#were literally married
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MORE ROCK LEE RAAAAH
#digital art#my art#procreate#art#fanart#rock lee#naruto fanart#naruto#sketch#rock lee fanart#my baby boy#were literally married
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matching outfits....
#hes my wife irl#were literally married#we are mops together#michael myers#rz michael myers#halloween 2007#rz halloween#self ship#bozoslasherart
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Yall wanna hear a kinda funny, kinda sad story about my grandmother and hetero-normativity?
Ok, so... when my grandmother was in her 50s (I was an infant), she met a woman at the Unitarian Church. And, as can happen when you meet your soul mate, this event made it impossible for her to deny parts of herself that she had fiercely hidden her whole life.
All the drama- their affair being found out, the divorce with my grandfather, the court battle over who got the house, happened while I was a baby. Even in my earliest memories, it's just Mama Jo and Oma, and my grandfather lived elsewhere (first his own apartment, then a nursing home, then with us.)
But here's the thing- no one ever explained any of this to me. No one ever sat down and was like "hey, Rosie, so do you know what a lesbian is?" It was the 90s. It was Texas. I think my mom was still kinda processing all this, and just assumed that like... I was gonna figure it out. Don't mention it, let it just be normal. Like I think my mom thought that if she explained the situation, she would be making it weird? I dunno.
But like. In the 90s, in all the movies I had seen and books I had read, do you know how many same sex couples I had seen? Like. 0. Do you know how many "platonic best friend/roommates" I had seen? A lot. I had no context, is what I'm saying.
I literally thought this was a Golden Girls, roommates, besties situation until I was like...I dunno, 11? 12?
It was actually their parrot, an African Grey named Spike, imitating my grandmothers voice saying "Johanna, honey, it's getting late", that triggered the MIND BLOWN moment as I realized that *there's only one master bedroom and it only has 1 waterbed* when all the pieces finally clicked.
Anyway. I think it's a real important thing for kids to know queer people exist, for a lot of reasons, but also because kids can be clueless and it's embarrassing to have your grandmother be outted by a parrot because everyone just thought you'd figure it out on your own.
Anyway, here is my grandma and her wife, my Oma, after they moved to Albuquerque to be artsy gay cowboys and live their best life. They helped run a "Lesbian Dude Ranch" out there (basically just with funding and financial support. As Oma has explained "traditionally, most lesbians don't have a lot of money" so they wrote the checks and let the younger ladies actually run the ranch.)
#this is the grandmother who passed away unexpectedly earlier this month#she was so cool yall#and so weird#they got married twice by the way once when Massachusetts legalized it and once when New Mexico did#they hiked the grand canyon together#they had a european river cruise planned for this fall#she was 89 and she wanted to see the whole world with her wife#and they were working on it#literally i thought they were roommates#and there was only one bed
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#i was curious bc i'm pretty sure my relatives from my mom's side have literally never interacted with the one's from my father's side#like sometimes i think about if i were to get married and i had to invite both sides of my family it would be so weird#but also for my family there's the issue of language barrier and racism so i don't know if it's different for other people#simone says
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comments from smosh cast + crew on shourtney's wedding post!!
ft. mythical, thomas sanders, macdoesit, and www.chess.com?? lol
#courtney miller#shayne topp#smosh#shourtney wedding#shourtney#smoshblr#if i missed comments... umm im not going thru those comments again i cant think straight#thought it was funny how some of the smosh gang are also acting confused in the comments AS IF THEYRE NOT IN ON IT#theyre REALLYYY selling it if its just a prank#real or not i KNOW they were all laughing around the office abt this#the battle btw angela damien and sarah trying to get first LMAO#this day is going to go down in smosh history as the day the the fandom broke#tbh real or not im just really impressed with this whole thing#even if im dying for answers#head vs heart ykwim#“guys its literally april fools” vs “guys theyre literally married now”#now watch me try to tag as many ppls names as i can TT#angela giarratana#chanse mccrary#amanda lehan canto#anthony padilla#damien haas#sarah whittle#arasha lalani#noah grossman#olivia sui#trevor evarts#tommy bowe#ian hecox#spencer agnew
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I think about this bit a lot
Bonus:
#jrwi the suckening#fizzfangs#emizel tucker#theo collins#jrwi soda#omgart#comic#I’d call deacon a bastard but he literally didn’t come up with this part#the wife and kids were all Emizel#ALSO. you know if Emizel’s marrying anybody but Theo then Theo’s got a monopoly on being best man#like THE GALL. of Emizel getting married WITHOUT HIM????#even IMAGINARY NOT-REAL married???#…I’m not past ep 9 yet but I just got chills there’s a marriage plot later on right?
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They're married my lord.
#tged#the greatest estate developer#tged fanart#lloyd frontera#javier asrahan#lloyd x javier#llojavi#javilloy#하비로이#Believe me or not#If Javier and Lloyd were married#Javier...he will take Lloyd's last name#Yes I'm literally talking about#javier frontera#FOR A GOD'S SAKE PLEASE SEE MY VISION#also silver hair javier my favorite
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The doors to Olympus are sturdy and strong, given everyone's preferences for drama and slamming said doors open and sending them cracking into the wall whenever the opportunity arises. Which is why it's a surprise when they creak open during the once-a-decade pantheon meeting; less so because no entity worth their salt would take so long to open the doors, and more so because everyone who is anyone is already there.
But if everyone is being honest with themselves- which no one is, usually- these gatherings are boring enough that the bland conversation is dropped immediately in favour of craning their necks to catch a glimpse of whatever is coming to relieve them of their boredom.
When the doors finally open however, several of the pantheon murmur in surprise.
"Odysseus," Athena whispers, wide-eyed as she pushes herself off her throne to her feet. It is him- in the king's garb he was buried in but the face he has when he reached home, hair till the shoulders and speckled with grey, face oddly blank. His feet are transparent.
"What are you doing here, sceptre?" Poseidon booms, hair the color of a stormy sea. Zeus, beside him, looks reserved, observing the ghost with something approaching curiosity- eyes flicking to the lightning scars on his daughter's face and back. "Your time has long passed, and Hades-"
"It is a temporary agreement," Odysseus says curtly, barely sparing him a glance as he approaches his patron. "Athena."
Her armour clinks as she steps forward and the gods all twitch, trading glances. Owls are silent creatures- to have her aspect so affected to make noise was... uneasy to say the least. She even holds herself different than usual, something like confused delight shining in her eyes. "How did you-"
"Did you sleep with my wife?"
The throne room is silent. Several jaws drop.
Athena straightens back up, blinking in surprise. She looks a bit shifty, some of the nymphs closest whisper to each other, which- well, almost every single god present owed some part of their existence to the mere story of Odysseus loving his wife.
Would he fight his own patron goddess over it in front of Mount Olympus, though? He certainly was unbalanced enough; Athena herself looked rather uncertain of her odds, even though-
"Are you addled in death, King of Ithaka?" Artemis drawls, looking amused. "Did you forget that your own patron is celibate? Whatever rumor you-"
"No, I-" Athena says suddenly, shifting her spear to her other hand. "I did."
Artemis chokes on her breath and several assorted divine beings gasp in shock and the rest shouting for explanations, although everyone is nearly drowned out by Aphrodite's loud, "WHAT?"
Odysseus inhales sharply and pinches the bridge of his nose. "I cannot believe you."
"She asked-" Athena starts, only to be drowned out by the din of various beings screeching and shouting about the scandal.
"ATHENA!" Hera hisses, peacock tail fanning behind her sharply as she pushes herself up. "Explain yourself!"
Athena half-turns to face her, face creased in a frown. "Mother, I-"
"LET ME REPHRASE!" Odysseus cuts in loudly, and the shouting settles down into silence. He walks to his patron, eyes blazing. "I cannot believe," he throws his clenched fists wide as he growls the last word, "-you took Penelope to bed-" Athena surprisingly stays still as he reaches her, mouth falling open as he grabs her by the chiton to yank her down, uncaring of the gasps of horror from all around as he snarls, "-before you ever kissed me."
And then Odysseus grabs Athena by the face roughly and kisses her.
This time Aphrodite's shriek cannot be escaped by anyone.
"Aphrodite, please," Zeus says a few moments later, wincing as his throne reforms around him, stained oddly pink. Quite a few minor entities have discorporated, and the ones nearest to her are still trying to regenerate their hearing. "Control yourself."
Their eyes land back on where Athena has dropped her spear- dropped her spear, Ares in the corner seems to be having some minor hysteria over this, well warranted- and is also on the floor, still being thoroughly kissed by that insufferable, mannerless hero of hers, perched on her stomach to reach. Zeus inhales in fury, Poseidon close behind him as the shock wears off, lightning crackling around his fingers as he opens his mouth to shout- of all the indignities-
"If you two ruin this for me," Aphrodite thunders, warping in front of them and glaring. "I will make you both regret it."
Both gods visibly blanch at the threat, taken aback for one brief moment. Threats from Aphrodite are far worse than any of her more violent siblings, at the end of the day.
Zeus visibly gathers himself just as Athena's helmet clatters to the floor, and he gains a second wind immediately, eye twitching as he spreads a hand to the spectacle in the middle of the hall. "WHAT MANNER OF DISRESPECT IS THIS? TO BARGE INTO OUR MEETING AND THROW ONE OF THE OLDEST GODDESSES TO THE FLOOR LIKE A COMMON WENCH-"
"Zeus," Hera says quietly. Everyone falls silent, although it's not quite enough to stop the two tangled together on the ground. She clears her throat, which finally seems to get through to Athena, who had finally seemed to have gotten over her shock enough to reach out, hands hovering over Odysseus hesitantly. Still, at the noise she seems to remember herself, pushing herself up on an elbow and dislodging him enough to break their necking. He pouts at her, but Athena's eyes are too glazed over to notice, heaving for breath.
Hera opens her mouth to speak, crown manifesting on her brow as she steps in front of the throne, but closes it as the door rattles again.
This time, the spectre shimmers with a faint hint of scales that comes with a freshwater nymph's heritage and excited whispers starved for drama explode across the room as the Queen of Ithaka steps into the room, skirts hitched in her hand and panting as if she'd been running.
"Your Graces," She bows respectfully before entering, Spartan princess through and through, until she catches sight of her husband and Athena, the former of whom seems to have taken the opportunity to start kissing the wisdom goddess again, fingers in her curls.
"What are you doing?" She snaps, rushing over. The entire courtroom holds its breath. She slaps her husband upside the head, making him yelp and move back to shoot her a betrayed look. Athena looks even further dazed than before, cheeks red. "Argos has more manners than you! No wonder Lady Athena wanted nothing to do with you- ah, hello, darling, by the way."
"Penelope," Athena murmurs hoarsely, and the Queen of Ithaka leans down to kiss her as well.
Odysseus chuckles, then jumps with everyone else as Hera slams a hand down on the throne elegantly, cracking it to the base.
"Ah, goddess-" He says, clambering off Athena to bow.
"Silence," Hera interrupts, holding up a hand, eyes cold. "You will not say anything to me apart from an explanation. My agreement for your release from Ogygia was due to the assurance that your marriage was one of the truest I have ever witnessed, conveyed by Athena herself when bartered with all of us to let you go. Tell me, was it a ploy? Because from the disgraceful looks of it, this seems to not be the case in the slightest."
Odysseus frowns, face twisting in confusion. "Athena bartered with...?" He turns to look at his patron, who stares back, unspeaking. His eyes flicker to the lightning scar over her right eye as Penelope traces it with horrified eyes and a gentle thumb, and understanding seems to dawn.
For a moment, rage seems to fill him, glaring with a hatred towards Zeus that everyone whispered later wasn't met by the god king with anger, but a flicker of remorse- before he visibly throws it away behind Athena's old smile and bows.
"God-queen," He says formally, gracefully. Hera twitches a bit, and they'll all talk later about how odd it was to so clearly see Athena's younger mannerisms in the man, down to the curl of the letters. "My marriage to Penelope has never been false, never been broken, this I promise you." He takes Penelope's hand and squeezes it for emphasis, and she raises them as acknowledgement. "But... can you not argue that Athena has been part of our marriage all this time? From its start, where she advised me on courting and her on what to look for, to the twenty years she spent with both of us- me on the battlefield and Penelope in the court; to say nothing of how she helped raise our son and lived in our palace in the days after. And is she not so unbearably beautiful that even my Penelope couldn't wait-" He shoots a glare at her, which Penelope returns with a smile. "-when the chance was presented? How can you fault us for disgrace, after being so long apart from our wife?"
Hera raises both eyebrows at the impudence, the kind of disbelieving expression that hides a warning to tread carefully. "So you claim to be both married to Pallas Athena?"
"In every way that matters except legality," Odysseus says, fearlessly. He is dead, after all, what much can you do to a shade that they didn't already put him through when alive. He is sort of worried about Athena, though, as they both help her back to her feet, Penelope busy whispering compliments and updates and endearments in turn- she's not usually one to be quiet in face of a problem.
Hera tilts her head. "Ah, but you see. I need the legality, if I am to finally-" A helpless, excited smile pulls at her lips once, twice, before unfolding into a bright grin, peacock tails unfolding to their full wingspan. "-finally arrange for a marriage for my eldest daughter who has not once- oh finally, I can hardly believe this day has come-"
"I do not like the way you grabbed her, Sacker of Troy," Ares steps forward as Hera starts ranting half to herself, half to an equally loud assemblage of joyful entities about wedding arrangements, eyes narrowed.
Odysseus barks an incredulous, loud laugh, gesturing to Athena with a slightly crazed look in his eyes. "This lady has broken- and I do not exaggerate- every single bone in my body before I saw my sixteenth year. I have punched her a hundred times in the face when she taught me how to fight. We'll survive, thanks."
"That is fair," Ares steps back, hands raised.
"What duties will you provide as spouses, Ithakan Queen?" Hestia questions, stepping forward.
"Oh, the same we did when we were living," Penelope huffs a laugh. "Keep her busy, make her laugh, be of mild frustration to her, love her well, worship her-"
"I do not. Need to know," Hestia closes her eyes and raises a hand to cut her off, stepping back. Around them, the din catches speed and volume as no further objections arise, excitement spilling into the air.
"What is happening?" Athena says faintly, looking around as if she was just waking up.
"-oh, and we can get out the decor once more! Hebe, Aphrodite, loves, do you remember where we kept the fountains-"
"-finally, a reason to celebrate! Call them all out of hiding-"
"-can't believe this is finally happening, oh sister, what songs should we-
"Why am I getting married," Athena says with much more alarm and horror. She turns to Odysseus and shakes him by the shoulder, eyes wild. "What did you do?"
"Nothing!"
"How is this nothing? Do you have any idea the headache-"
"Athena, sweetheart, will you consider changing into that beautiful piece you made for the ceremony?"
Creakily, she turns her head to Hera, disbelief pasted across her face. "Mother," She says slowly. "They are both dead."
"Oh, I'll make a deal with Hades or something, you hush!" Aphrodite leans forward and snaps, before her irritation melts back into a manic joy. "Oh, what paint shall we do?"
Paint, Athena mouths, looking afraid for possibly the first time since her conception.
Penelope laughs and tugs on Athena's hand to make her turn, tucking dishevelled curls behind her ear. She wonders if the goddess knows how beautiful she is when she's flustered. "Take us away," She whispers. On Athena's other side, Odysseus leans against their patron with a besotted, helpless smile as he stares up at her, her helmet and spear in hand. She'd missed Athena like a limb, missed her deep laugh at night when they'd discussed the day's court, the dry jokes, the hands over hers as she weaved- but Odysseus wasn't himself without her, happy though they were in Hades' lands together, all of them.
"I'm-" Athena wavers, then looks around once more at all the excited screaming, something unreadable flashing in her eyes. Almost against her will, her eyes fall to Zeus, who is sitting silently and staring back at her. Poseidon looks like he still wants to start a fight, but clearly by his wary looks below can tell he will be heavily outnumbered by the overexcited crowd to not try, but Zeus just stares back at her, face blank of any emotion.
"We ask you formally this time," King Odysseus says, walking in front of her to take her attention away, holding onto her hand. His voice has strength in it, drawing the eyes of the murmuring crowd, but he's deaf to it as he stares up at her.
"Will you be our wife?" Queen Penelope asks, joining him, watching their beautiful patron shudder for breath she does not need as her eyes flick to one of them and then the other.
"Yes," She whispers and cheers erupt all across Mount Olympus.
"Finally!" Odysseus complains, and then pulls her down once more to kiss her, all three of them fading at the edges as one of the generous gods present there- who seems to realize that they're not very inclined to stop anytime soon- thankfully teleports them away into a nice room with a large bed.
"Finally," He whispers as he breaks apart to lay her down, cupping her face, voice heavy with the longing of a full lifetime and more. Penelope circles to the head of the bed and starts undoing Athena's braid, staring at them both lovingly.
Later the ones closest will murmur, as the silhouettes faded away, that tears had slipped from proud Pallas Athena's eyes as she placed one hand against Odysseus' cheek, trembling.
"I missed you," She will whisper back, and all three of them fade away to their own story, yet to be made.
#sorry athena ur not immune to the “when will u get married” mom speech#anyways i believe in demisexual athena amen#epic the musical#odysseus#penelope#athena#odypen#you know the eyes w spirals in anime thats athena after being kissed by her bff within an inch of her life on a regular tuesday#hera#woman is on CLOUD NINE she will literally kill anyone who gets in her way this time. the wedding is gonna be great.#aphrodite#< also going crazy shes been trying to matchmake her sister for a thousand years now#ares#< extremely conflicted. has never felt protectiveness for athena before this moment . also he wants eye bleach.#hestia#“HOW WILL THEY MAKE A HOME IN THE UNDERWORLD WHAT HEARTH-”#zeus#athena hasn't spoken to him since god games.#also tbc pen Didnt know ody and athena were Not Like That. she was convinced day one that they were a package deal.#and the two of them had literally Never considered it even though it was the norm! but once he finds out that Penelope did ody casually#just like. figures out a way to get to mount olympus from hades and storm in to plant one on her#athena x odysseus x penelope#< ig?? whats the ship name#to anyone who sees this vision. join me.#odyath#penath#odypenath#my fic
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This is my favorite type of Moshang
#svsss#shang Qinghua#mobei jun#Mobei-Jun#moshang#scum villains self saving system#scum villain self saving system#the scum villain's self saving system#scum villian self saving system#sqh#mbj#i love when mobei jun is so sure that he's snagged the perfect husband only for him to realize said husband had NO idea they were married#that shang Qinghua has been dying everyday to kiss him when he literally could do it any time he wanted#literally its SO GOOD I ITS MY FAVORITE#sorry for my handwriting#and any typos if you see then 😭#my art#nibbelraz#also ya i forgot his demon mark and edited it in 2 minutes after posting but thats ok
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rewatched bsd w my friend seeing it for the first time and the nostalgia of seeing these two together again hit me like a bus
#literally mom and dad of the agency#dazai and kunikida protect yokohama but more importantly they also protect atsushi#funny story but we were watching in sub and the translations were wack bc when i watched dazai refers to kunikida as his colleague#but in the version we were watching he just called him partner w/o any context it was so fucking funny😭#bro rly just pointed to a random man across the river and was like “oh that's my partner btw!! we can use his money to treat you to dinner!#my bestie made me pause the show and was like “????partner. are they married??? either way it's cute that there's mlm rep in this anime🥺”#i was genuinely holding back tears#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#bsd#dazai osamu#osamu dazai#kunikida doppo#doppo kunikida#kunikidazai#knkdz#lotus draws#SRY FOR THE UNGODLY HR IM POSTING AT I DIDNT WANT TO LOSE THE MOTIVATION I SUDDENLY GOT AFTER WATCHING THE FIRST FEW EPS#IVE WANTED TO DRAW THESE TWO FOR SO LONG IDK WHAT TOOK ME SO LONG😭😭😭😭
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Together
#LITERALLY WHAT THE HELL SCREAMING CRYING THIS IS SO CLOSE AND INTIMATE#CAPS KISSING!!!!!!#carlos sainz jr#charles leclerc#charlos#f1#scuderia ferrari#c2#c square#australia 2024#EVERYBODY THEY GOT MARRIED!!!#I mean they were already married but they finally chose to have a public ceremony for it#THIS IS THEM AFTER RECITING THEIR VOWS AND THE MINISTER LETS THEM KISS#AND THEN THEY GENTLY PULL APART AND SMILE AT EACH OTHER LIKE THIS#soft smiley giggly happy
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Do you have gemcyt designs for joel and lizzie?
i do now!!!
#gemcyt#mcyt#su#steven universe au#empiresblr#empires smp#<- designs were heavily based on their s1 vibes#chris doodles#smallishbeans#ldshadowlady#do they have a ship name or a duo name#i dont know if they do#surely they do theyre literally married#(edit: i have now learned... regrettably)#jizzie
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The foxes are maybe the most interesting iteration of the found family trope I've ever seen. They love each other. They hate each other. They spend half their time fighting. They literally hide behind each other when threatened. They call each other slurs. They're all gay and date each other. They're mentally ill and traumatised. They're so problematic it's ridiculous. Canonically three of them are murderers. They have a massive sleepover where they all snuggle together .Some of them have about two lines of dialogue together. What the fuck
#tfc#aftg#neil josten#andrew minyard#kevin day#fr tho like#im reading fics rn and they range from#“these people are codependent due to mutual levels of trauma and mental issues”#to “these people were briefly on a sports team together and a few stayed friends and got married but most of them barely interact”#and its all perfectly reasonable#you can literally write them any way and it fits
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see you at home
#hades#hades game#megaera#megzag#zagreus#literally childhood friends/exes gets me every time#and then they were MARRIED#and also COWORKERS#and she has a WHIP#all the best things in one#they're bisexual even#genuinely i spent hours on this going back and forth on how to draw megs face#and the colors#i have such an intense love hate relationship with coloring
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Maybe I just feel this way because I have mixed feelings about musical Gelphie as a ship, but it seems to me that the way the musical fandom ships Gelphie reflects the ways that the musical is "the Glinda show." Personally, I can believe that Glinda might really be in love with Elphaba and not Fiyero, but I just don't see the same being true for Elphaba; her love for Fiyero and the trauma of losing him are too essential to her arc. Yet the fans insist that Fiyero is just comphet for both ladies.
*looks around nervously for the Gelphies* You said it, not me.
Seriously, you took the words out of my mouth. I’ve re-read Wicked countless times during the years, even adapted it into a movie script, so I close read it pretty carefully. Romance-wise, Elphaba’s true love was definitely Fiyero. And no, it wasn’t comp het, either in Elphaba’s character or authorial (also, accusing Gregory Maguire of out-of-character comp het is just hilarious).
Let’s put aside the fact that Elphaba went into a trauma coma when she lost him, gave birth to his son during said coma, went to the Vinkus to ask forgiveness from his wife, lived there, worked tirelessly to find out what happened to Fiyero’s whole-ass family after they were captured by the Wizard’s guards, and ran his family estate for years. Let’s put all of that aside.
Fiyero was the only one in the whole damn book even to come close to matching Elphaba intellectually and philosophically. He even manages to challenge her on some points (and honestly, imo, he did gag her at some points). He even reached a level of empathy for the Animals on his own, witnessing an act of violence. And he risked his own life to protect Elphaba, even following her in her assassination attempt to Madame Morrible. And it was thanks to his influence that Elphaba ultimately refused to hurt others in order to kill Morrible (they literally had a whole conversation about collateral damage, with Elphaba prepared to accept it and Fiyero firmly against it). When he died, it was as if a key part of Elphaba had died as well. It was in that section that she truly became the Witch.
With Glinda, Elphaba would essentially be replicating her dynamic with Nessarose as glorified handmaiden, and this at best. Also, Glinda was never that great an influence on Elphaba in the books to begin with; the whole point of that section was Elphaba’s influence on Glinda. And Glinda did not go with her after their meeting with the Wizard, and Elphaba did not offer.
Even in the musical-verse, Fiyero actively chooses Elphaba and her cause. His support is ultimately why Elphaba chooses him. With Glinda, she would have to live in her world, work with the Wizard, and turn a blind eye over the injustices of Oz. And that is something Elphaba can’t or will not compromise, as she knows it would lead her into certain danger.
#princesssarisa#ask#wicked meta#wicked book#re-reading key parts and i was mistaken before in one crucial respect#book glinda does not tell elphaba she wants to come with her#she just tells her to get in the cab to return to shiz#i checked all of my editions#i know i’m shocked too#i could have SWORN#i guess i was gelphied#elphaba does not ask her to come along this i knew#that is not a great argument against gelphie though since there is clearly a protective element to her decision#elphaba protected fiyero in similar ways#it was ironically fiyero’s own love and protectiveness towards her that doomed him#granted elphaba’s future with both glinda and fiyero were doomed#fiyero because he was married and glinda because of *gestures vaguely* literally everything#i once read a gelphie tweet admitting that even though they thought gelphie was the more interesting ship endgame fiyeraba made sense#the power of boss ass writing#even the musical got it right even if they made fiyero a bit of a glinda clone#cristina metas#fiyeraba#faeyero
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promise i have not disappeared off the face of the earth, just am writing an android!price au and it is KICKING my ass rn
general plot is fem!reader is married and price is their new android that her military husband gets her so someone is in the house to keep her safe while he's away. and it's dubcon bc ofc it it. excerpt below while i try to wrangle it into something salvageable lol
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The night before Arthur comes home, you try to sort yourself out. Routine is only another day away and you crave it so bad that your mouth waters with it. You decide you’re going to speak with Arthur when he gets back, tell him that you understand why he has left John with you, but it’s just not working out.
Standing at the kitchen sink, washing clean cups again, let John stand to the side of you. You’re feeling petty, the thought of being rid of him soon filling you with a specific type of bravery. It’s like he knows, you tell yourself. That’s why he’s being so quiet. Waiting for you to speak first rather than the usual, where he lets you know what he’s going to do, as if to forewarn you to not even try.
You hear him stand, turn around just to see him adjust himself in his trousers. You frown, confused. Perhaps stare a bit too intently at his crotch. He looks back at you, amused in the way that you imagine hunters are when they hear an animal yowl in pain from a shot. “Can I help you, ma’am?” he asks.
You flush but refuse to look away from him. “Is that just something to make you seem human? I can’t imagine you actually have -” Cut yourself off. Filthy words that have never been spoken in this house. Only the sweet back and forth of you and Arthur’s routine. Would feel like a betrayal of some kind, as if Arthur will come home and hear the echoing of your foul mouth hours after, bouncing off of the walls and settling into the grain of the wood.
“You asking if I have a cock, sweetheart?” John asks, steps closer. Slippery hands clench around glass. He looks like he’s scented blood, like he wants to dart forward and finally catch you in this elaborate game that you’ve been playing that only he knows the rules to.
“Why would you? What purpose would that have?” you return, frowning at him. Disapproving, a familiar role for you, even if it is relatively passive compared to how you feel now. You feel the absurd urge to hiss at him, poison in your mouth. Feel how it burns your gums.
“Most likely a function for bored housewives,” he drawls, dark eyes intent on you.
You freeze, stare at him. You know that he isn’t supposed to speak to you like that. Know that backchat must not be some certain part of his hardwiring. He seems to be challenging you as well, watching you with that half-smirk, half-scowl of his. You tilt your hand under the hot water, let the snapping burn of your skin pull your focus away.
He clicks his tongue, as if disappointed. Feel the point of his stare on the sink. You twist your hand, the squeak of flesh against glass, grating.
Your skin turns red under the water, the flow shattering against the nerves on the back of your palm before it is suddenly stopped. You startle, heat at your side suddenly as he pulls your hands out of the sink, dries them with a gentleness that quiets you.
The hair across his knuckles tickles against the smooth of your own. He holds them, as if he just wants to. Function done, the gap between one order and the next. You stay quiet, watch him. Study him for once.
He’s openly frowning now, thumb against the blotches of red. “Be careful,” he says, suddenly, as if the temperature reading he has just read on you is not to his liking. Body twisting with displeasure. Feel him run it through his synthetic surface and into your skin, running through wiring and into your blood vessels, becomes your own.
Open your mouth to snark back, silenced when he gives you a firm look. “It’s only water,” you mutter, sullen.
“Doesn’t matter,” he barks back. Culls you. “I don’t want you near the sink.” You bristle. “Or will you wear gloves next time?” He looms over you, a threat in the size of him. The urge to behave for someone bigger than you. The way he doesn’t have to throw you around, the shift of his bicep is implicit enough.
“I’ll wear gloves,” you give in, mullish. Desperate not to be banned from the sink in your own home.
He settles with that, one last smooth over the back of your hand, leaves you feeling like static. “Good girl,” he murmurs. You hear it like a gunshot, and spend the rest of the day with music blaring in the kitchen, hoping to drown that sound out before your husband comes home and finds it in the metal of the sink.
Or worse, hears the intake of breath you emitted. Guilty.
#john price#john price x reader#cod x reader#call of duty x reader#android au#nic talks#really trying to make it good guys. like smth about a married woman who is barely hinged#and price is like. i will literally make myself a real person so i can tie you down and make sure u never do anything again#really struggling to justify why he fucks tho like ill be fr thats the sticking point#like we make fun here. but the in universe reasoning for him having a cock. idk man those scientists were just divas i guess#HAH
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