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#well thats not all i need but its all i can really give myself
mistyechoes · 1 year
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I think an hour long hug while watching mutant mayhem with a friend I love dearly would fix me
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uygfiug · 2 months
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thought my school was finally going to try & help me next year but it sounds like theyre just trying to get me to act normal without actually helping
#idk it all sounds very familiar#i have to 'prove i can do things i dont want to do' and theyre going to help me 'fix my behaviour bc uni wont tolerate it'#but the behaviour they mean is just me being disabled#its about how i freeze up sometimes i think#and i cannot bring myself to do whatever im supposed to#sometimes i cant even move or speak#thats the behaviour they mean#but i cant just make that go away#ive been trying all my fucking life#also??? i go to school every fucking day?? does that not count as proving i can do things i dont want to do#surely they dont think i want to be there#idk man this is exactly the kinda stuff they said in primary school before they started punishing me for being disabled#like giving me extra work bc i froze or something#or send me away to work alone in a room & not talk to any of my peers bc i didnt manage to talk to the teacher#force me to make eyecontact for a full 10 minutes while giving me a lecture about why eyecontact is so important#or not allow me to go outside for breaks#that kinda stuff#it sounds like they have the same idea?#so im very worried about going back to school in september#they were supposed to attempt to help more this year as well but outside of one thing they didnt really do anything#and now they want to 'be more firm about it' ????#i dont trust that#mine#also !! ive been getting told all my life that whatever the next stage is they wont tolerate my behaviour there#in primary they said id never get past first year in secondary#in secondary they say i wont get through uni this way#seems to me that really its fine#yeah i need help sometimes#but also i could probably go to uni & itll be fine#ill have my diagnosis & ill figure out who i need to talk to & how i can get the help i need
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i need to consume something or my thoughts consume me
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This semester's summary: existential crisis, existential crisis, existential crisis
#ah and 💸💸💸#so im always good in words compared to action so theory is not bad but my skills is lacking#im aware of it but im always a bit slow to catch up and all and that's one of my biggest insecurity#anyway today we had our last review skills session and i was unfortunately standing nearest to the trolley#so i was selected to do the tracheostomy suctioning and boy thats one of the skills that im really bad in#and i was struggling so bad and im shaking and my group has the top students and while i give no fuck you can see how they judge me#and the person in charge for that section is a master student who is having her assessment and i really dont want her to get bad results#so more panic and insecurity#but throughout the session she still guide me patiently and even say like its okay youre doing great and all#and by the end of it i got the grip of it but i was so upset with myself and regret everything#but then she lightly touch my arm and said its okay youre doing really well when i obviously fucked up#and then i just.. cried#what a good thing i wear a mask because two of my course mates are tested positive today because damn#and i keep on pretending to wipe my glasses when i was actually hiding my tears like damn this is embarrassing#but... i really want to thank her personally but i cant even talk just now and i dont even know if i will meet her again#because i really am doubting myself lately and that word is really comforting and i really needed to hear it#god 2nd year sucks i didnt even cry throughout my first year even when i did the worst presentation of my life and look like a dumbass#i always rant here you guys must be sick of me lol#personal.txt
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qazastra · 1 year
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actually can i complain about my boss again.
apparently he only wants to have one experienced person on a training shift from now on. one person to train the entirely new worker how to work at our cafe. because "labor costs are through the roof." are you
are you fucking with meeee FUCK WITH MEEEEEE YOU PAY US MINIMUM WAGE YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO COMPLAIN ABOUT THIS
hes just simply not going to have people who know what to do then!!!!! bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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blueslight · 2 years
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👎
#I domt think I made it clear enough to my now ex girlfriend that I broke up with her because she is absolutely unbearably clingy#and now.i feel guilty that she didnt get it cuz like until she realizes that all her relationships are gonna fail cuz any normal guy would#lose his fucking mind at her and anyone who WOULDNT would probably use her depedence to abuse her and like. I know that and i feel.bad for#evidently not making it clear enough to her#cause like also even now shes still being clingy with me ....and i find myself unable to set proper boundaries cause I dont wanna be mean#and them im morally unhappy with myself. but like then again i DO set boundaries she just doesnt respect them . and then I lose my#composure and get mean and thats even worse cuz i dont wanna be mean to someome as fragile as her but like. Shes suffocated me so much im#in the mindset of a cornered injured animal . and they bite#and it frustrates me that i cant react organically to her cause i always have to keep quiet and not protest even when she really crosses#my boundarjes cuz i dont wanna upset her#and she even said herself that even now im the omly.person she wants to talk to and i told her several.times to go talk to our other#friends cuz how am i supposed to comfort her about her breakup WHEN I DID THE FUCKING BREAKING UP..#plus I dont want that like i dont want the sole responsiblity for her social interactioms and emotional support just because shes#got unhealthy attachment behavior and refuses to get therapy ..#and like now its like well i domt wanna be mean or hurt her even more but also I dont wanna comfort my ex ABOUT *OUR* FUCKIMG BREAKUP that#is 1. fucked up EVEN THO we are still friends like id.comfort her about other stuff but how does she not realize that this wont. help#and 2. it gives me fuckin war flashbacks to my last relationship which just activates my injured animal instinct even further#and Idk why i cant set boundaries w her cuz i can do it well with other people but she just paralyzes me somehow w this stuff EVEN THO WE#GET ALONG WELL WHEN WERE LIKE NORMALLY PLATONICALLY INTERACRING#idk man i just need a fucking breather like i understand breakups hurt and i was anticipating giving her space until we can properly be#friends again (which we agreed on wanting) but like#Its not gonna get any better for her if shes constantly interacting w me#and on god her attachmenr to me isnt entirely healthy AND I DOMR WANNA SUPPORT HER UNHEALTHY BEHAVIORS but i also dont wanna be constantly#like acting on a meta level thinking whats besr for HER instead of just acting on instinct ...
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fardf150 · 3 months
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fuck
#like idk i never realized just how bad she hurt me. i didnt even rly realize she hurt me at all#bc there are so so so many ways she sldve reacted so much worse. but like i never thought someone cld just straight up ignore it.#like i get the way i told her was dumb and confusing. ok. i can understand that. whatever#but idk. she said she wished my sister had told her years earlier so that she cldve helped her back then#but then suddenly it's different when it's me. suddenly it's 'but youve always been my little girl' and 'oh i dont know that sounds dangerou#s' and 'are you sure?' and 'how long have you felt like this'#well it's been almost 5 fucking years now and it hasnt changed. i havent changed. fuck#i trusted her. i trusted her to be there for me and to support me and to accept me and she threw it back in my face and never even blinked#i can never ever trust her again and she doesnt care. she doesnt even know bc shes so wrapped up in all the fucking lies she tells herself#fuck. she did everything wrong. fuck. i can never fully trust anyone with this part of me again bc of her#and it's awful bc it's such an important part of me. it brings me so much joy and i think on it often and i love myself for it#but it's just simmering in my chest and every time i think of letting it hit air again i freeze bc i thought it was safe once and it WASNT.#i wanted to get my name changed before high school. i wanted to start the medical process. i wanted all the thing i thought shed do for me.#my wants and my understanding of my identity has changed now but it still hurts.#it hurts so bad to see other ppl my age get all of that and to have the support of their family and to not be afraid to put a name to it all#im happy for them. but it's so awful hearing her point those ppl out w no self awareness like oh thats so good for them isnt that sweet#I AM RIGHT HERE! YOU COULD BE DOING ALL OF THAT! I NEEDED YOU TO BE THAT FOR ME!#and every time she does acknowledge it she gets it completely wrong or it's just to bemoan how little she understands#'oh everyones changing their name now its so confusing' 'im really trying i dont know what else you want from me' NO YOURE NOT! YOURE NOT!#YOUVE NEVER BEEN WILLING TO TRY. NOT FOR ME.#you never fucking loved me you loved the idea of what you thought i would be and you cant fucking let it go even when the truth is staring#you dead in the face. fuck. you complain about how i 'hate you' or 'think youre stupid' well maybw treat me with an ounce of respect and act#like you understand the things youve EXPLICITLY BEEN TOLD. even a little.#but honestly it's too late. if she were to suddenly have a change of heart now i wouldnt give a damn.#the damage is done you dont get to have this part of me and act like youre such a good and supportive mother.#i cant even say i hate her. i love her but shes hurt me more than anyone else ever has and i can never trust her to actually love me or even#fucking see me or support anything about me that actually matters to me#i dont know. i dont know. thinking about it again.#ive thought abt telling my dad. not bc it wld do any good but bc ik he values honesty and maybe hed throw me a 'damn that sucks'#my sister said this is something i have to fight on but she doesnt get it. i have no ground to stand on as far as shes concerned
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hecksupremechips · 9 months
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Mutuals I have a dilemma and I require assistance okay
I have a massive crush on someone that I am friends with and I want to shoot my shot cuz it’s getting like unbearable keeping this to myself lol but they were in a long term relationship that ended badly a while back and it kinda messed them up so I don’t know if they’d really wanna consider dating me, or if they even like me that way and I would just be like. Really sad if I got rejected and they’re such a good presence I don’t wanna lose our friendship but I’m like gonna explode if I have to keep this in any longer so what should I do and how should I go about bringing this up 🥺
#i am also just gonna talk about them a bit cuz teehee i just NEED TO#theyre so fucking cool theyre all punk rock they play the electric guitar and can SCREAM really good#theyre only a little bit taller than me and they got this pretty shoulder length dark hair#theyre really shy and dont talk much but theyre so funny they did these really good spongebob impressions to make me laugh#and i literally started happy flapping it made me so happy!!! and they like my impressions too!#and theyre so sweet like so sweet to animals they love animals so much they said its a fault#they have this baby orange cat named momo hes just the cutest baby i love him so much#and they work horrible jobs just because they needed to move out cuz momo was being forced to live outside in a cage#and they were just so upset they worked really hard to give momo a good life#and they took me to this cemetery where their family was buried for generations and like we found one grace that was broken#like the top had fallen off and they put the pieces back together and pat the top and was like ‘there you go buddy!’#guys i was like OHHHH like that was the final straw that got me down so bad#theyre really smart too they told me all about exotic fruit and this forest in utah thats the biggest organism in the world!#like all the trees are all connected its so cool!#and we played mario party they were donkey kong they spammed the button that makes thre characters laugh#going ooh ooh aah aah#and theyre soooo cute they have like nose rings and painted nails and a rose tattoo and nice hands really pretty lips 😳#they were trying to make a black denim skirt out of jeans and they cant sew well so it kinda fell apart#i definitely think im just gonna take it and sew it up for them myself cuz they were SO EXCITED to have a skirt and im just#IM NOT LETTING THEM BE ROBBED OF THIS EXPERIENCE I WILL SLAVE AWAY WITH THE NEEDLE IF I MUST#hnnnghh god i just like them so much i really just wanna kiss them and like cuddle and wrap my legs around them and uhhhh 🫣#like i dont get crushes much and even the ones ive had ive been skeptical to if they even were crushes#but i literally cant stop thinking of this person we talk like every day and just talking about them has my heart pounding#im just so worried about them not liking me back or them being too hurt from their last relationship to give me a shot#according to jackie i ‘got it bad’ so getting rejected would just be like. hnnghhh scary#WHAT DO I DOOOOOO
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toastsnaffler · 2 years
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man. getting a little sick of being everyones 15th option for everything. when is it my turn to be someone's first choice :^[
#or even second tbh I'll take it#i had a couple old friends from college msg me recently to tell me what theyve been up to#which is sweet and i care abt them n wanna hear it! but they dont ask after me or show any interest in how I'm doing#and it makes me feel like I'm just their journal or smth. a brick wall they happen to be standing near#don't get me wrong I love to be useful. but when ppl only ever interact w u bc they need smth from u. well.#rly not doing anything good for this complex im developing where my self worth is directly tied to my usefulness to other ppl lmfao#i dont want to be ppls fucking dog!! or not any more than i already am but whatever thats all im good for i guess!!#and i desperately want someone to be my fave person rn bc all my energy is going nowhere + im at my best when im at my most devoted#so ppl treating me like this rn is just making me incredibly vulnerable to being taken advantage of.#like yeah i am eager to please and ill follow anyone around and do whatever for a crumb of attention but maybe#if you're actually my friend u shouldnt be encouraging that behaviour. even if it makes u feel good like cmon thats not so cool man#or if you ARE going to encourage it then maybe u should acknowledge the power dynamic ur creating + try not to abuse it. idk 🤷‍♂️#urgh idk maybe im just saying words rn im very tired#I just feel like all the friendships etc I have atm are slipping into that dangerously unbalanced zone + becoming v one way#and I don't know what I'm doing wrong I'm trying the best I can and I guess its just not enough for anyone and that really really sucks#I'm doing better mentally rn but I dont currently have a support system + there are a lot of destabilising forces in my life#so im just. worried abt the direction things could take if I lose this foothold I've dragged myself onto yknow.#and I wouldnt have to be so worried abt that all of the time if I just had someone literally anyone I could rely on or even trust#but oh well. it is what it is. doing all I can to take care of myself so hopefully it won't come to that anyway.#sorry for rambling on so much if u read this far I'm giving u a kiss on the cheek don't worry abt me honey I've got this#anywayy goodnight#.vent#.diaries
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genderkoolaid · 1 year
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some musings on transmasc mulan:
i think the reason why Reflection & mulan as a trans man is impactful to me is the fact that mulan appears as a woman and has the social role of a woman. i love rep of transmascs who are fully transitioned/present masc or male! but ive thought a lot about the erasure & invisibility of transmascs throughout history. the bits of our history we do have tend to be people who had the ability to pass as men, but there were undoubtedly so many trans men&mascs who lived as women, who could not pass well enough to live full-time as a man, who were wives and mothers! and idk i find it really impactful to read Reflection as the pain of a trans man in the closet, or who doesn't even realize that being a man is a Thing they can Do. i love how it touches on the pain of failing to be a woman. i think part of it is how often people want to dissociate trans men from misogyny, or at least control how we are "supposed" to relate to it. again, the mainstream (queer) narrative around transmasc history (and present) is trans men who could/can pass as cis men, who live their lives fully stealth. but there are and always have been many transmascs who live as women, most or all of the time, and who have to struggle with the demands of misogyny to be good daughters/wives/mothers, and the knowledge that to be a trans man would make you such a disgrace and disappointment ("if i were truly to be myself, i would break my family's heart"). i think its important to give a voice to the trans men past and present who live as women and their gendered experiences! i desperately want to give a voice to every trans man throughout time who lived and died in a dress, who had children, who thought they were the only one or who didn't even understand what or why they were.
obviously mulan does crossdress and does pass as a cis man, but specifically "Reflection" to me means a lot because i love how it can be read to be an expression of closeted transmasculinity. with transmascs, the bits of history we do get are constantly scrutinized by everyone; there's an unspoken rule of "cis woman until proven otherwise, why do you want to erase women?" and again! thats just when it comes to "women who crossdress" situations! people are so stingy when it comes to who they will "allow" transmascs to claim, seeing a "feminine cis woman" expressing transmasculinity feels transgressive in a very good way to me. also, i think we need more recognition that there are a lot of feminine women who really wish they were men (because they are), and its important to represent that experience and make it clear that being feminine (while presenting as a woman, or in general) does not mean you can't be a man.
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mrfoox · 2 years
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Ok over an hour later and no im still a mess...
#miranda talking shit#I know i wont find an answer today bc i need time to weight pros and cons etc but like... My mind really is all over#Do i have the right to set some kind of rules? He's more experienced than me and this was his idea. Meanwhile im a virgin and basically not#Done much at all... Would it be crazy if i set some rules or boundaries anf what would those be? The obvious is. If i say im uncomfortable#It stops. That goes for him too. But idk if i can demand more and what it would be? I at one hand cant see myself setting the pace#Bc im so anxious and shy... Plus i wonder if theres anything one can do about ... Me feelinh potentially used? I dont know#Thats a worry for me. That he'll just want to f me and then hes gone. He said he wouldn't bc he cares about me#But its a worry? But how would that... Work... He have to give me a hug before he leaves? Would that be stupid idk.#My biggest fears is that I'll feel used or develop more feelings. I think i have the feelings under control. I obviously like him already#But if we do this we would go in with those expectations. Id not expect him to love me like that... I feel like i should for my own saftey#Set up some ttpe of rules to prevent me being hurt but i have no experience so i cant say what a rule would be stupid and what would be#Helpful/reasonable? I also know. We wont go all the way any time soon. He said that to me that he knows that im still a virgin#And he would not want to be the one to take it if i wasnt completely comfortable with it. He knows that if we do iy it'll be very#Well... Mild for a long time unless always. I know anyone who knows me will most likely scream and tell me not to... But also more than 50%#Of me really wants to... I feel like if this is a mistake? He'll be the best person I'd be able to do that mistake with? Does that make#Any sense? Because i trust him and like him and i feel like he does the same for me... I feel he would listen to me and respect me and not#Force me or push himself on me? And im definitely curious... Like yeah... And id kinda want to get some more experience... And gasp#Have fun??? Like when we discussed this even i laughed. He made me laugh during this. So i was obviously comfortable enough to do that#I guess this is an brain vs heart thing... Am i stupid and selfish for wanting this bc it'll potentially feel good and I'll feel wanted?#Maybe. Probably. But also... I can not think of any mistake like this ive ever made in my life. I havent allowed myself to do stupid shit#Ive not gotten stupid wasted or done something like that in my teens... This feels. If it'll hurt I'll learn from it and not be scarred#Forever? But i dont know. I think big part is that its new and exciting and all that and i want something like that... I want to feel#Something like that.... At least for a while as long as its actually fun...#Any advice or thoughts please do share. I know i sound naive and stupid bc i am honestly... But is that only a bad thing?#Idk genuinely so... Any thoughts I'll take anything. Or questions or any own experience i just need some others views
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chaepink · 1 year
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bark for me | sub!denji
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wc: 400+ words | masterlist
dom!reader, kinda puppy boy!denji, slight crying, pet play, collars, praising, begging, thigh riding
note : puppy boys are so cute
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"bark for me, denji"
The blond flushes red at your command. You want him to bark?
"Go on. Do you need me to repeat myself?"
You raise an eyebrow at him and give a sharp tug to his leash, making him whimper. With the way he's sitting at your feet looking up at you, you're able to see the way the bell connected to his red collar—you knew the color would look good on him—jingles as he moves and how his face turns red from your praise or insults.
Especially the way his dick is hard and continues to leak pre-cum no matter how hard he tries to hide it between his legs and with his hands.
Denji gulps and licks his lips. The fact that he's naked and that you're fully clothed makes him even harder.
"w-woof?"
Your stare stays blank. Did he do it wrong?
"Thats disappointing denji," you say, letting out a feign sigh. "That sounded like a question rather than a actual bark. Maybe you're not fit to be my dog after all-"
"N-No! P-Please!" You stop talking as you see actual tears well up in Denji's eyes. "Please... i-i swear i'll be a good dog for you!" He paws at your legs as he pouts at you. His bell jingles as he frantically tries to convince you for another chance.
You coo at him, your hand going down to caress his check. You can feel the way he tilts his head to rub against it gently.
"Really? Then prove it." Denji shivers at the tone of your voice. "Know that I won't give you another chance so go on and bark." He knows its not a request, its a command. And he's not one to ever disobey you.
"woof woof!"
At last you smile at him and Denji feels his heart swell, knowing he did it well. You give him a pat on the head and rub it, watching as he lowers his head to hide his flushed face.
"Good boy"
You watch as his body shivers from the praise. He lets out a whimper as he rubs his head against your thigh, looking at you with pleading, innocent eyes.
"Please"
"Please what, baby?"
He lets out a whine. "Touch me please!"
You take a quick glance at his hard dick and look back at Denji who has a pout on his lips. How adorable.
"How about you ride my thigh?" You watch as a grin appears on Denji's face and his personality changes into a more energetic, happy one.
"R-Really?" You smile and if you didn't know any better, you would've thought that there was a actual tail behind him wagging side to side if you were to look.
"Yes baby, think about it as a reward." Immediately he jumps onto your thigh, a whimper leaving him as his dick touches your thigh.
He slowly rocks against you, afraid to speed up in case he's not supposed to. But your impatience gets the best of you and you grab his hips to force him to ride your thigh faster.
He jolts as he lets out a gasp that soon turns into a needy whine. He quickly crams his face into your neck, letting out quiet whimpers and moans as he wraps his arms around your neck. Each roll of his hips against your thigh has him letting out even louder noises, letting you to assume that he's close.
A hand leaves his hips and goes to travel up his back before it gently wraps around his neck.
You hear his breathing turn ragged when you gently squeeze his neck, your head turning sideways to whisper in his ear.
"such a adorable puppy, arent you?" Denji lets out a whimper and wraps his arms around you even tighter, his hips practically rutting against your thigh on his own, trying to chase his orgasm.
"If you want to cum, i want to hear you properly beg for it, denji."
With a slight nod, he lifts his head from your neck only to throw it back as particular thrust of your thigh has his body shivering in pleasure.
"ah! please! fuck- let me cum please" He looks at you with tear-filled eyes as he paws at your chest with a pout.
"wanna k-kiss you ah!" You quickly bring him into a kiss filled with teeth clashing and some rather lewd noises coming from him.
He's so eager, really. Even with the way his hips are humping your thigh as if his life depends on it and the way he's moaning and mewling against your lips, you still think he's so so cute.
A perfect puppy boy for you to ruin, for you to keep, and to play with whenever your heart desires.
You pull back from the kiss and have to pull on his hair in order to keep him from chasing your lips to which he whines at. With a grin, you mumble against his mouth.
"Go on and cum, baby."
He widens his eyes at your command but he doesn't waste another second and shoves his face into your neck with a muffled cry, his body spasming as his orgasm hits him hard. Ropes of his cum shoots out and onto your clothes and his chest.
His hips slow down as the intensity dies down. You press a kiss onto the side of his head.
"You did so good for me denji." Denji lets out a hum and cuddles against your body further. He stays still and when you look at his face, you find out that he fell asleep on you.
Perhaps your puppy boy used up too much of his energy today.
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ty for reading to the end! ❤ - chaepink
╰┈➤ masterlist | rules
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tgcg · 8 months
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bad mouther, hole master
TG: kissing with tongue is gross as hell
CG: COME THE FUCK OFF IT.
TG: what
CG: I'M SAYING SHUT UP.
TG: oh
CG: IT'S NOT THAT WEIRD. IT'S LIKE THE NATURAL PROGRESSION OF REGULAR KISSING TO EVENTUALLY INCLUDE THAT. IF YOU HAD ANY SEMBLANCE OF ROMANCE GHOSTING THROUGH THE DEVOLVING REMNANTS OF YOUR THINKPAN YOU'D APPRECIATE WHAT IT BRINGS TO THE NUTRITION PLATFORM OF ANY CONSENTING CONCUPISCENT RELATIONSHIP!
TG: youre talking about it like its a goddamn military weapon or some shit
TG: some kinda scientific fuckin method to fondle a dudes mouth with your own mouth thats
TG: thats gross
TG: this isnt supposed to be a debate before fuckin congress on the pros and cons of getting your mack on
TG: its i would say a reasonably personal thing to react about and thats just my reaction man you dont gotta arbitrate it
TG: and like why the hell do they have to linger on it so long in these movies do they really want me to immerse myself in people necking each other that much
TG: roll the sounds around in my earholes like im swilling a fine fuckin wine
TG: well my professional opinion is that shit tastes and sounds mad gross and tbh i havent seen a single movie where it was close to being any kind of necessary
TG: its just a cringy waste of everyones time
CG: YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT, AND I DISAGREE WITH EVERYTHING THAT COMES OUT OF YOUR IGNORANCE GASH, YOU LUMP OF TIGHT-LIPPED CLUELESSNESS.
TG: did you just homestar me
CG: FOR THE SAKE OF ARGUMENT, SINCE YOU'RE APPARENTLY DESPERATE TO START SHIT WITH ME RIGHT NOW: HAVE YOU EVER EVEN DONE IT?
TG: hell no
CG: THANK YOU FOR PROVING MY POINT.
TG: proving your point--
TG: bro have uh
TG: have YOU???
CG: EXCUSE ME? HAVE I WHAT?
TG: come on
TG: i walked into this stupid conversation with a fucking shovel and by god am i digging myself a damn hole big and wide enough for every dave across time to squeeze in so i might as well get cosy in this shit before we all start collectively shoving dirt in our mouths
TG: bet your ass im taking you down with me though
TG: grab your spade and get digging man
CG: GRAB MY WHAT????????
TG: just tell me
CG: ???????!!!!!!!!
TG: karkat
CG: NO!
TG: f-
CG: WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM!!!!! WHAT PART OF "SHUT UP" DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND????
TG: wait no
TG: oh my god dude
TG: you can spin that shit all you want but you can do it the hell away from me
TG: i do not need to be hip to your weirdo foursquare fantasies
TG: patently not my business
CG: STOP RIGHT THERE. JUST SHUT IT. I AM PUTTING US OUT OF OUR MISERY RIGHT NOW. I AM CONDUCTING AN ACT OF MERCY ON THIS INSANE FUCKING CONVERSATION AND YOU ARE GOING TO ZIP YOUR LIPS AND TAKE IT.
CG: HERE IT IS: YOUR SINGLE OPPORTUNITY TO PRETEND YOU NEVER SAID THAT TO ME. I AM GOING TO FORGET YOU MADE A COMPLETE MOCKERY OF ME AND MY CULTURE THIS ONE TIME. AND LET YOU CONTINUE TO DIG YOUR STUPID, SHITTY HOLE.
CG: AND DAVE, I AM BEGGING YOU NOT TO WASTE IT.
CG: TO ANSWER YOUR SHOCKINGLY INAPPROPRIATE QUESTION, NO I HAVE NOT DONE IT.
CG: WHO GIVES A FLYING FUCK.
CG: HAPPY?
TG: ……..
TG: way to defuse the situation solid work
TG: real gold star effort grabbin that lit wick and blowing on it
TG: ok first of all you asked me first so dont act like im the one being a weirdo about this
TG: second of all i didnt mean it like that and you know it
TG: THIRD of all what the hell was the point of engaging the knightly theatrics then if you cant even verify that shit
CG: WELL FUCK, SORRY DAVE! I GUESS I'M JUST A FUCKING ROMANCE ENTHUSIAST! I GUESS I GIVE A MAJOR SHIT ABOUT THE THING YOU'RE OPENLY MOCKING TO MY FACE! IS THAT SO IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU TO WRAP YOUR THOUGHT SPONGE AROUND?
CG: AND IT WAS COMPLETELY REASONABLE FOR ME TO ASK YOU THAT, YOU CONGEALED FETID NOOKSTAIN! MY STATUS ON THE MATTER HAS LITERALLY NOTHING TO DO WITH THE POINT EITHER OF US IS TRYING TO MAKE.
CG: TRY TO KEEP YOUR NUGBONE FROM CAVING IN ON ITSELF WHEN I DROP THIS BOMBSHELL: I'M ALLOWED TO HAVE OPINIONS ON THINGS I ACTUALLY KNOW ABOUT, EVEN IF I HAVEN'T DONE THEM! I DON'T JUST GO TROUNCING THE FUCK ABOUT LOBBING MY UNFOUNDED OPINIONS AT PEOPLE LIKE I KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT ANYTHING. UNLIKE SOMEONE WHO MAY OR MAY NOT BE INVOLVED IN THIS CONVERSATION WE'RE HAVING RIGHT NOW!
TG: youre
CG: I’M TALKING ABOUT YOU BY THE WAY. THE SOMEONE IS YOU.
TG: oh gimme a break
TG: bro youre going apeshit over something you havent even done
TG: you know what that sounds like to me it sounds like an overcompensating fake fan who doesnt get any
TG: you heard of troll napoleon complex
CG: AT LEAST I ACTUALLY FORMED MY OPINION BASED ON CAREFUL CONSIDERATION --
TG: -- oh yeah i bet huh
CG: -- INSTEAD OF JUST BANKING ON NUBJERK --
TG: -- not a real thing you just said
CG: -- REACTIONS AND WRINKLING MY SNIFF NUB AT ANY SIGNS OF GENUINE PHYSICAL INTIMACY!
TG: stop saying nub
CG: YOU EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED BULGEWAD
TG: not too much worse than being a perpetual fountain of emotional diarrhea
CG: DON'T YOU DARE.
CG: DON'T YOU DARE TRY TO USE THAT AS A "GOTCHA", YOU--… YOU! FUCK!
TG: dude did you actually run out of insults
TG: okay this is getting concerning
TG: youre the international dude of verbal dunks
TG: that can not be happening
CG: AAGHRJRGHJRGRHJAGHRJGRHJAGRHJRGRHJRGRHRJR
TG: you cant run out of em youre like the ultimate peddler of hate
CG: YOU DON'T THINK I'M CRITICALLY AWARE OF THE HOOFBEASTSHIT I'M SPEWING NIGH FUCKING CONSTANTLY?! I AM PAINFULLY COGNIZANT OF HOW MORONIC EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS IS!!!!
TG: feel like ive done some damage here
CG: ESPECIALLY MYSELF!
TG: alright bud time to calm down
CG: YOU CALM DOWN!!!!
TG: okay whatever!
CG: WHATEVER!!!!!!!!
TG: jeez
TG: here
CG: UGH.
TG: yeah
TG: really glad stuff like this happens in private
CG: YEAH. SAME HERE.
CG: JEGUS, CAN WE GO BACK TO BEFORE WE HAD THIS CONVERSATION? I DON'T ASK YOU MANY FAVORS, SO SURELY YOUR SLURRY OF ILL-DEFINED TIME POWERS CAN ALLOW YOU TO DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT.
CG: JUST LIKE, WIPE THAT WHOLE THING OFF THE SLATE.
CG: LET'S START OVER. SAY, FIVE MINUTES AGO. HOW DOES THAT SOUND?
TG: what conversation?
CG: OKAY, GOTCHA.
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welldrawnfish · 10 months
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So these last few days has been.. Turbulent. DIFFERENT
I think I may be a System? Infact I KNOW I am a system at this point, but Im also not ready to accept that. Well a part of me isnt, and the other parts of me are like… uh duh of course you are. 
*A system in this context refers to the collective consciousness under the DID / OSDD Umbrella, I dont know the correct terminology in all of this, so im so sorry If i I mess up. I don’t necessarily want to give myself a label, there's .. brain scans and stuff I can get to prove it. And I need those, thats the only way I know this is real. But for now, for my own mental health I am treating it as if it were.. “real “ And I dont really know… what to expect…? I want to find something, ANYTHING, on I guess.. Systems waking up? But I cant find it. So I’ll just do this here Im gonna dump out all our thoughts onto some comic pages and we will figure it out.  I had a bit of an awakening roughly.. 5 days ago, and for the sake of convenience gonna use Plural/System terminology - There are alters, I have met them, the have names and personalities and some of them are really fuckin annoying i just want to punch him in his TEETH
Anyways, since the alter awakening moment, my brain has been in TURMOIL parts of me accept this, parts of me dont, i keep feeling like my face is like shifted 2 inches to the right and everything gets fuzzy in the real world. Not that these alters have names like.. Files are getting sorted  into these proper figures and everything is getting explained and figured out. And its making me feel like I'm not me anymore?
Like I always would argue and barter and fight with my own thoughts, but that's the thing, they wer thoughts, voices in my head with just like, distinct personalities. I just saw it as a different part of me?? Figured that was normal.
But now they are.. stronger ? OR maybe because i'm more aware of them and the personalities I can tell whos out now and like.. Obviously they are happy to get some facetime with the world properly?? But like.. Am *I* just aware of it, aware of them now, aware that it is not just *I* but *We* and so noticing it more, I'm resisting even harder? We feel more fractured than ever.
I have a good friend helping me out, another system, I owe them everything, maybe my life. (PLEASE FOLLOW @transpanda-1 BTW THEY DESERVE IT) They had a few amazing tips, but I cant keep bugging them about every anxiety on my mind thats not fair, so I’ll ask the whole community.
I guess what I want to know is.. Like is this normal? Do all systems go through this? What should I expect in the future and how do I make this more streamlined and stop.. Fighting it? I guess?
I thought I finally had myself figured out, just be the girl who makes the funny relatable trans comics… it was simple.
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babybinko · 1 year
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Made a TON of Venture Bros. genderbends :D
Bonus + some of my thoughts on all the designs under the cut:
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This is from a conversation I had with a friend about how Dermott and Hank would behave in this AU (its exactly the same as normal)
Ok now some thoughts on my design process
Hank: I think I drew Hank's face actually perfect, I made her so cute. I also feel like there's a common trope with genderbends where athletic characters get short hair so I gave her long hair and gave Dean short hair. I actually think the longer hair fits her perfectly. ALSO I LOVE HER BOOTS.
Dean: I gave goth Dean more Accessories than normal because normal goth dean had no fucking swag (it was besties idea to make her pants ripped). Even before I started drawing college Dean I knew I was giving her those legwarmers you can pry them from my cold dead hands. Same with the legwarmers I knew the first dean design needed a Jean skirt its just the vibes.
Dermott: The millisecond I even thought about doing Dermott I KNEW she would be 2012 grunge girl aesthetic. Gigantic shoplifting energy. Love her.
Rusty: I wanted her to look like a mean mom and I believe I accomplished that goal. Absolutely had to add the glasses strap. Very Jamie Lee Curtis.
Brock: I drew the one with the hair down first and my friends preferred the one with the hair up so I just did both. I wonder if she was a cheerleader in college and killed another girl on her cheer squad by throwing her too far/dropping them.
21: I drew 21 then I realized I had just drawn myself with bangs. Also I drew her with a blunt because there's an episode where 21 has a joint in his mouth the whole episode the other henchmen are standing in stupid poses in the background and its maybe one of my favorite bits in the entire show its so stupid.
24: 24 took several attempts to get the hair right I kept drawing it short and curly and my friend told me to give her Elaine from Seinfeld hair which I think ended up working really well.
Monarch: One of my favorites I did. I feel like this one you can definitely tell how Bayonetta completely re-arranged my brain chemicals as teenager. I love the hip cutouts, I made a tummy cutout to kind of mimic how Dr.GF's monarch costume is kinda skimpy. It's also hard to tell because of the cowl but I tried to give her like a finger waves hairstyle.
Dr.Gf: I tried a bunch of different hats but my friends liked the brimless hat the most and completely doomed him into looking like a Bellhop (more than he already did). Its giving Tyler the Creator at the 2020 Grammys. I still think he's cute though :)
Billy: I really didnt want to just draw her in a suit because thats boring. The show always gives me 60s vibes despite being set in modern day (I'm sure its on purpose) and I definitely channeled that with Billy. It took a couple tries to find a balance between fitting her body but still looking adult but I think I got it in the end.
Pete: YAYYYY PETE YAAAAYY!!! ^_^ Shes so Ava Max Coded. I also gave her giant buckles on her shoes to match his stupid ass one two buckle my shoes ass shoes.
Triana: Very much looks like putting emo boy in the Pinterest search bar. I made her thigh highs into his sleeves and I gave him square bangs like her.
Dr. Orpheus: NEEDED to make her a hot milf and I did. Its a little hard to see but her shirt has lace over the open part. I love the hair Jewerly at the bottom of her braid. :)
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anonymouscheeses · 8 months
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Obvious shit I noticed part 3 (spoilers for welcome to heaven)
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Look at her! "Teehee"
Also she's nervous! Foreshadowing omg 🤯
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STICKERS! Two pride stickers and a cute donut. Gives me an idea to draw Chaggie at a donut shop while everything is burning down <3 (I'll probably do it but if any artist wants to as well go ahead!)
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*CHOKES ON COFFEE* I LOVE THEM. I'M SORRY I GET SO GIDDY WHEN THEY HAVE EVEN THE SMALLEST INTERACTION BUT UGHHH I NEED MORE, IT WILL NEVER BE ENOUGH 🙏🙏
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KISSY! MWA! *SCREAMS INTO THE VOID*
Vivzie give me more, moar now. MOAR
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DAMN. SHE CAN THROW- or maybe it just exaggerates the perspective in this frame but still- ZAMNNN
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Cherri x Sir Pentious fans RISE UP.
I wasn't ever really a fan of it myself but I always thought it was CUTE. Like 3 seconds before this part I was already begging for them to kiss 😭
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More foreshadowing!
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AAAAAA CREEPY BIRD THINGS!!!
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Oh wait- Sera's hot and Emily's already adorable
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If heaven don't look like what this is in the show, I DONT WANT IT! (THATS A JOKE PLEASE DON'T SMITE ME)
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JEALOUS GIRLFRIEND VAGGIE!! Can I just say how much I love Vaggie's face expressions? Not just here but like all the time. She's just made to be so exaggerated, out of all of them I thought it would be Charlie who would have the most dramatic faces but Vaggie wins it for me. I JUST GIGGLE SO HARD WHEN SHE LOOKS LIKE THIS BAHAHAH
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Okay yeah. It's very obvious now. Vaggie is definitely an ex-exterminator. They don't close in on Charlie here so it's made to subtly nudge the attention to Vaggie. HOW DID THEY IMMEDIATELY NOTICE IT WAS HER THO??
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Hot-
That's it.
SHARE THAT MOTHUSSY GIRL-
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YOU'RE TELLING ME SHE GREW OUT ALL OF THAT HAIR?!? YEAH ITS BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE THEN BUT STILL AJJSJD.
But overall the design is pretty meh. I always loved the idea of short hair Vaggie and even have seen art of it but it's just yknow, alright. Reminds me of Cassandra from Tangled: the series. IM LISTENING TO ONE OF THE SONGS RIGHT NOW HELPPP
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THIS SCENE HERE! WOOOOO! SO GLAD WE KNOW WHEN AND WHERE THEY FIRST MET!! Wish we got it extended tho. And also probably push it to next episode so it would have a better impact(atleast I think thats when they'll have the duet). BUT WHATEVER SOMETHING IS BETTER THAN NOTHING! or uh whatever
Vaggie must've been a bit terrified at first. The only sinner she ever sent mercy to was a child. Then to see someone who to her is an adult sinner who just looks really human, that must be crazy. BUT THEN IF SHE WAS TOLD THAT CHARLIE WAS ACTUALLY THE PRINCESS OF HELL? HOOOO, LOCK IN AND STEAL HER. THAT'S SOME WATTPAD SHIT. Also, I wonder how long Charlie thought of redeeming sinners. It would make sense to be after meeting Vaggie, since it could have been a wake up call to the fact not all sinners are bad people. Even though Vaggie isn't a sinner technically, Charlie didn't know that at the time. But maybe Charlie was always like this but just needed to meet someone who could start her dream with her. Long rant uhhh
Haha penis 🫵
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SCRAP WHATEVER I SAID IN THE FIRST PART. THEY PROBABLY DO FUCK- OR DONT?? I DONT KNOW- ANYWAY LESBIAN SEX (BOTTOM TEXT). WHY DO I CARE SO MUCH??? SOMEONE PULL THE TRIGGER.
Lute looks like a basic asf anime gorl. Adam doesn't ever take his helmet off, or maybe he just can't. OH HE'S DOING THE GAY SIGN 💅💅 Very appropriate for what he's saying
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Mentor, apprentice. I love that Husk is just trying to help Angel grow but isn't going to force him into it if he doesn't want to.
Im not a fan of huskerdust and think they'd be better friends as I can't imagine a relationship with them at all. But it's still nice and they are supportive of eachother so that's like- yknow. Basic rules. Or something like that. (HELP. I ruined it all at the last part)
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I- girl- WHY IS SHE GROWLING?? GRR GRR RR (INSERT TWILIGHT SAGA HERE)
VAGGIE'S FACE. SENDS ME. WHO GAVE HER THESE OVERDRAMATIC EXPRESSIONS, I APPLAUD YOU RGAGAGA
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Ooo... I didnt like this part at all... Instead of making the choice she just runs off. Then because the plot demands it, Adam says nothing. Kinda whish she atleast avoided the question, maybe in some way that would require actual thinking? For a character like Vaggie, she could choose either way and it feel like it's still her. If she chose to protect Charlie's dream, she would still be perfectly loyal to her but in the act of so would reveal a secret that could harm their relationship(which does happen at the end but that's because the plot wanted it like that). If she chose to side with Adam, she'd be hurting Charlie emotionally, sure, but it would keep a secret that could make Charlie see Vaggie less than who she is to her already(atleast what Vaggie might think would happen). Imo it should've been her deciding to protect Charlie, since it would mean she's devoted to her at all times.
ANOTHER THING! IF SHE COULDN'T MAKE THE CHOICE, THAT IS SOMETHING INTERESTING TO GO INTO. Maybe it could go deeper into how Vaggie doesn't know who she is without Charlie. So when she has a choice to make, like here, she can't do it without feeling the need to ask Charlie. BUT NOOO, YA HAD TO GO WITH THIS!! Wow. That was a long ass rant. Wtf 😭
Maybe I'm a dumbass. Maybe they'll talk about that next episode, but still, atleast touch on it a bit to not seem rushed?
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Angel looking out for his kids like a mom. We always did need the motherly figure, the one closest to that being Charlie but girl needs a mother in her life too(damn, wait, I did her so dirty).
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Huh, so why does it work here then? 🤨🤨 if it was said in the contract that Valentino can do whatever he wants only in the studio, then why is this the exception? 🤨🤨
Yes I'm stupid. Why do you ask? (No genuinely what's happening here)
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OH ITS THE IMAGE! I really like Sera so far, hope we get more of her soon or in season 2.
Now that we know the context of this, yeah, that's fucking insane. And badass. WOMEN.
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HMM. THATS STRANGE. DID YOU NOT FOR ONCE THINK THERE COULD BE A POSSIBILITY SHE MIGHT HAVE BEEN AN ANGEL? Okay I probably wouldn't either but I have an excuse, I'm an idiot. Some girl with a standing out outfit, with one eye, looks unusually human, right after/during the extermination... that's pretty solid ass proof. But I'm dumb so don't take anything i say seriously :D
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Imagine this. No- shit. Just-
JUST LOOK! THEY ARE SO CUTE! EVEN THOUGH CRAZY SHIT IS HAPPENING.
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*SWEATS*
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Vaggie is DESPERATE. PLEADING. That's obvious yeah, but don't mind me I had nothing to say for the last 3 images I just thought they were cool
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I mean. Slay I guess. 😍💅
Do all the exterminators look similar or is it just Lute and Vaggie? 🤨
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Even though Vaggie and Charlie may be going through this horrible thing with a hard punch in the gut, but Vaggie is always going to comfort her and I just think that's so adorable.
Also Adam looks like a chicken hah.
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Everyone fears to be like Lucifer. If they don't do bad things they believe are for the greater good and make sacrifices that put them higher than those in hell, they could themselves be fallen. It's really interesting but I don't know if it's going to be fleshed out enough with the amount of episodes left. Which also worries me about everything else that still hasn't be concluded. There's gonna be loose strings I just know it. Hopefully though they rather do that then rush everything out y'know?
I want the next episode to be mostly focused on Vaggie and Charlie's relationship and the healing of what happened. Not for the entire episode of course, it would feel drawn out if it did, but atleast address the problem for the first like I would say 10 minutes? Then the rest would focus on one or two loose threads while also having Vaggie and Charlie acting upon moving on. That's just my idea but yeah-
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