#well im here to have fun... effort is deserved on both parts....

[lottevence]

to be loved is to be seen

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆

steve harrington x fem!reader

summary: after accepting that he needed to focus on himself and stop with the constant dates, steve was forced to face some of the things he bruied inside with some drunken words by his favorite poet for the second time.

trope: friends to lovers, slowburn, being vulnureable to eachother, fluff, sorry its kinda depressing

────────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ────────

The first time she affected steve with her words were at a party. Steve was still mourning what happened with nancy even after all that time and she just had the right words, everytime.

Robin, steve and her attended the party together. It was a highschool party but who cared if steve and her graduated last year? Steve and her both had clearly drank slightly too much, robin was with vickie which meant no bothering them.

Steve wouldnt say you two were actually close like besties, no. You had these invisible walls around you, the walls that not many people noticed but he did. He actually noticed that you never talked about your stuff yet listening intently when someone talked. Thats what intrigued him the most. He was curious what was behind those walls.

After a few hours of dancing with the crowd, drinking and having fun, you were nowhere to be found. He didnt know why but he wanted to know where had you headed off to. Were you with a boy? or where you still having fun in the crowd without him? He HAD to know.

He looked around the halls, of course crowded with couples hanging out. He looked at the livingroom which turned into a dancefloor with everyone swaying to the music that was playing. He looked at the kitchen where all the alcohol was, still you were nowhere to be found. He still didnt know why he looked everywhere for you in his drunken state. Lastly he went out to the backyard. Here you were, sitting at one of the chairs at the porch with your marlboro red as you took a drag. He wasnt surprised finding you here just like this, he was more like... relieved? He sat beside you. "why am i not surprised finding you here just by yourself?" he said with a loopsided smirk of his. You turned to him, your lips turning into a smirk too. "well, am i that predictable?" Your words twisted something in his stomch, something that shouldnt have twisted because of you. He looked at you, grabbing a cigarette and lighting it. "maybe you are." he said with a slight tone of teasing. You glanced at him taking a drag "you okay?" you said. Only thought inside of his mind was, how did you noticed when he tried so hard not to be noticed. He sighed, looking at the sky above two of you. "its just that, sometimes i just feel like... i try too hard for things that i really shouldnt.." The words slipped his lips before he could prevent it. She hummed silently “You know… I don’t think trying too hard is a flaw. It just means you care, maybe more than most do. And yeah, not everything deserves that kind of effort but honestly, it’s one of the things I admire about you. Even when you give too much, you make things better just by being you. You've really changed yourself.. for the better.." She said softly as she watched the stars with him but quickly added, chuckling softly. "sorry, i always become too 'poetic' when im drunk." Steve was stunned upon hearing this, he turned to her in disbelief as his eyes wandered upon her with something raw. "you.. really think so?" Steve asked , barely above whisper. She took one last drag of her cigarette and turned to him. "and i hope... you never lose that part of yourself."

That was the first time he felt so appriciated and.. seen. He felt so understood that he looked at her freezing for a while until they started chatting again. That was the first time she affected him with her words.

────────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ────────

After that night steve started to notice simple yet affectionate things about her. Things that she did to her friends casually.

She was always there when one of them needed. When robin felt down she would sense it right away, getting her all the snacks she loves with her favorite movies without robin saying so. When eddie had a depressive episode she made sure to get to his trailer and make him his favorite brownies -with an igredient they both love ofcourse- playing his favorite music throughout it all even though it was not her favorite at all. When it came to steve she was so understanding, always having some kind of answer that always affected him deeply. She was just the professional to understand people but herself? She never shared, sometimes wandering off but quickly getting back her attention to you if she senses someone studying her. He didnt know why she was so close yet so distant. He wanted to understand, see you. This was diffrent from his past relationships, not that he didnt care about them but he never had to be curious about someone this close to him.

The second time was at one of their camping trips

.

Robin shouted as practically ran off to the lake the moment tents were done "FINALLYYY! i was waiting for this the whole time". You looked at her chuckling softly with your bright smile, "robs be careful, you'll slip!" you said as you walked towards her after removing your tshirt, leaving you with your bikini top and your shorts. Eddie and Steve chuckled to the two's interaction as they both removed their clothings before catching up to them. When you arrived at the water you removed your shorts too and looked behind the other two, robin urging you all to hurry. "c'mooonn the waters so nice." she said giggling still. Your eyes found steves after getting inside the lake with robin. The look of him walking towards you was... something that would make anyone flushed. You quickly looked away as you didnt want any of your looked noticed in any way.

The lake water was cold, but the kind of cold that felt like summer — fresh, alive, something that made you laugh as it hit your skin. You and Robin had been giggling like children, splashing each other as the sun dipped lazily behind the trees. Eddie was shouting something about leeches, but no one paid attention.

Steve, now waist-deep, had his eyes on you again.

Not in a creepy way, but in that quiet, studying sort of way. Like he was reading your body language the way he used to read comic books as a kid: slowly, over and over, hoping to notice something new each time.

You met his eyes briefly before looking away, pretending to focus on Robin dunking her head underwater.

He didn’t know what possessed him — maybe it was the warmth of the day, maybe the buzz of the beer he’d had earlier — but he waded closer, until the ripples of his movement lapped gently around your legs.

“You’ve got a weird way of always knowing what people need,” he said quietly.

You raised an eyebrow, water glistening off your skin. “Do I?”

“Yeah,” he said, eyes fixed on the way the fading sunlight caught in your hair. “Like… you see people in ways they don’t even see themselves.”

You tilted your head at him, the usual guarded look flickering behind your eyes. “It’s not that hard,” you said. “People are loud when they’re hurting. Most just don’t listen.”

Steve took a breath, suddenly very aware of how close you were. “You listen too much. But never talk.”

You went still. He could see it — the tiniest shift in your expression. A beat of silence passed before you swam a little further out, putting distance between you. Not enough to be obvious, just enough to feel safer.

“I guess… some people talk when they want to be saved,” you said, voice softer now. “Others just hope someone will see them drowning without having to say a word.”

Steve blinked.

There it was.

The second time.

The words that dug deeper than he expected, that made his chest twist and his throat tighten with something unspoken.

“Are you one of those people?” he asked, voice nearly breaking.

You smiled — not your bright, Robin-style smile, but that small, tired smile you saved for late nights and heavy truths.

“Maybe,” you said, “but I’m a pretty good swimmer.”

And then you dipped underwater, leaving Steve alone with the sting of something that felt a lot like falling.

────────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ────────

The sun was gone now, and the only light came from the fire they managed to build — mostly thanks to Eddie and a questionable amount of lighter fluid.

The lake shimmered dark in the distance, and the air had cooled just enough for you to wrap a hoodie over your damp bikini top. Steve watched you across the flames, the soft orange glow catching in your face, painting shadows under your eyes. You looked tired, but calm. That kind of calm he’d seen in you before — not peace, but pause. Like holding your breath.

Robin and Vickie were curled together on the same log, whispering and laughing. Eddie was on the ground, legs stretched out, a joint tucked lazily between his fingers. Steve sat next to him, beer in hand, cigarette lit but half-forgotten between his lips.

He kept sneaking glances at you.

You sat a little off to the side, cross-legged on a blanket, rolling a new cigarette from someone’s leftover tobacco pouch, fingers quick and practiced.

“You roll like a pro,” Steve commented after a few minutes, standing up and walking over to you. You didn’t look up.

“Learned young,” you said, licking the paper shut. “House full of people who’d rather smoke than talk.”

He sat beside you, close enough to feel the heat of your arm when it brushed his. You offered him the finished cigarette without looking, already lighting another for yourself.

He took it, nodded in thanks. There was silence for a while, just the crackle of the fire and Eddie’s soft humming.

“Earlier,” he said, voice low, “what you said… about people drowning.”

You exhaled smoke slowly. “What about it?”

He hesitated. “Did you mean me?”

You glanced at him finally, eyes unreadable. “Did it feel like I did?”

Steve nodded, barely.

You took a sip of your drink, then tapped ash into the grass beside you. “I didn’t mean to make you feel exposed,” you said. “But… yeah. Sometimes you look like you’re trying not to sink.”

The truth of it hit harder than expected.

“I’ve been trying,” he admitted, voice shaky now. “Trying not to be that guy anymore. The one who’s always chasing something—girls, attention, I don’t even know what. It gets exhausting.”

You looked at him for a long moment. “You’ve changed, Steve. You really have.”

He swallowed. “Does it show?”

“Yeah. In the way you listen now. In the way you don’t talk about Nancy like you used to. In the way you’re not trying to prove anything anymore.”

A beat of silence.

Then you added, your voice gentler, “You’re not drowning anymore. You’re just tired.”

Steve looked at you like he wanted to say something else — something important. Instead, he reached out, wordlessly, and stole the cigarette from your fingers to take a drag. You didn’t pull away. You just smirked a little, smoke curling past your lips.

For a moment, it felt easy between you.

Then you leaned your head back and looked up at the stars. “Drunk me says too much again, huh?”

“No,” he said quietly, watching you like you were the only thing that made sense in the dark. “Drunk you says exactly what I didn’t know I needed to hear.”

You turned to look at him, and for the first time that night, your expression softened completely. You didn’t say anything back.

But Steve felt it — that unspoken thing pulling tighter between you two.

And this time, it wasn’t the beer. Or the smoke. Or the stars.

It was just you.

────────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ────────

Steve woke up with a sore neck, a dry mouth, and the distant regret of drinking one beer too many — again. The sun was already high, cutting through the trees in streaks of gold. Birds were chirping too loud, and Eddie was snoring just as loud somewhere inside his tent.

Steve rubbed his face with both hands and slowly sat up. Someone had tossed an old hoodie over him during the night. He wasn’t sure who, but it smelled faintly like Marlboro and vanilla lotion.

You.

He looked around.

Robin was crouched near the embers of last night’s fire, poking at a dented kettle balanced on some rocks, trying to coax it into producing some kind of drinkable coffee. Her hair was a frizzy halo of chaos, her shirt inside out, and she was humming tunelessly under her breath.

“You’re a vision,” Steve croaked as he walked over and plopped down on the log beside her.

Robin didn’t even look up. “If by ‘vision’ you mean dehydrated and suffering, then yes. I am beauty, I am grace.”

Steve smiled, resting his arms on his knees, eyes half-lidded. He watched the kettle for a second before speaking again.

“Did you sleep okay?”

“Like a dead guy,” she said. “You?”

He hesitated. “Kind of.”

Robin didn’t say anything for a second. Just stirred the kettle with a stick like it would make it boil faster. Then, without looking at him, she said, “You gonna tell me what that was last night? By the fire?”

Steve’s head snapped toward her, caught off guard. “What do you mean?”

“Oh come on, Dingus,” she said, finally meeting his eyes. “You and her? Sitting there like the cover of some indie record? Sharing smokes, talking like you’re the only two people on earth? I may have been tipsy, but I’m not blind.”

Steve looked away, jaw tightening slightly. “She just… says things. Stuff that sticks.”

Robin tilted her head. “You like her.”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “I don’t know. Maybe. She’s just… different. Not in the ‘oh-she’s-so-mysterious’ way. More like—she gets it. People. Me. But she doesn’t let anyone get her.”

Robin nodded thoughtfully, finally pouring the vaguely coffee-colored liquid into two mismatched mugs. She handed him one.

“You know, for someone who says she never lets anyone in,” Robin said, sipping her coffee with a wince, “she sure says a lot when she’s with you.”

Steve blinked. “You think so?”

“I know so,” Robin replied. “She talks more around you than anyone. And you? You listen when it’s her. Like really listen. Which is saying something, because half the time I have to throw popcorn at your head just to get your attention.”

Steve laughed under his breath. Then he stared into his cup for a moment.

“She said she hoped I never lose that part of myself,” he murmured. “The part that tries too hard. Said she admires it.”

Robin softened. “Yeah. That sounds like her.”

“I think it was the first time I ever felt seen,” he added, quieter now.

Robin bumped his shoulder. “You deserve that. To be seen. And maybe you should let yourself see her, too. The real her. Not just the quiet cool girl who says poetic things when she’s drunk.”

Steve looked up at her, brows furrowed. “How?”

Robin smirked. “You’re Steve Harrington. You’ll figure it out.”

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By the time the coffee kicked in and the hangovers dulled into background noise, the group slowly came alive again. Robin and Vickie took control of the tiny speaker and started blasting cheesy ’80s pop hits while Eddie tried (and failed) to make breakfast on the rusty camping stove.

“Eddie, I swear to God, if you give us food poisoning before noon—” you called out from your spot on the picnic blanket.

“It’s called ‘flavor,’ sweetheart,” Eddie said, dramatically flipping something vaguely egg-shaped with his spatula. “You wouldn’t understand.”

Robin snorted as she handed you a drink. “He’s poisoning us with love and half-cooked bacon.”

“Honestly,” you shrugged, grinning, “that’s kinda romantic.”

Steve watched from where he sat at the edge of the group, still sipping his coffee, legs stretched out in the grass. His heart did a dumb little thing when he saw your eyes light up like that — soft and playful, your walls forgotten for a second.

Eddie burned the toast, then burned his finger, and Robin screamed-laughed while Vickie tried to help him with a Hello Kitty bandaid she brought from her purse. It was ridiculous. It was perfect.

After the tragic breakfast was consumed, someone suggested a game — Robin, naturally — and soon enough the six of you were knee-deep in a very competitive round of “truth or dare,” made up entirely of bad decisions and too much honesty.

Steve had to do ten jumping jacks while holding a beer in his mouth (he failed miserably). Eddie was dared to serenade a squirrel. Vickie admitted she once cried during a car commercial. Robin kept rigging the dares so she could get people to do karaoke. You laughed so hard you nearly fell over when Steve dramatically sang Take On Me into a marshmallow stick.

Later, when the sun dipped a little lower, the six of you made a sad little attempt at roasting marshmallows. Eddie lit his on fire immediately. You and Robin stole everyone else’s chocolate and built the worst s’mores tower ever made.

It was sticky. Loud. Beautifully dumb.

And somewhere in the middle of it all, Steve looked around at his friends — Eddie’s laugh, Robin’s endless commentary, your smile when you thought no one was looking — and felt something shift.

It was the kind of moment you don’t realize is golden until you’re far away from it.

But he already knew.

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The sun was low again, orange bleeding into pink as the heat of the day slipped away. The group had started to scatter — Robin and Vickie had retreated to the tent, whispering and giggling under the excuse of “changing clothes.” Eddie had wandered off with his guitar, probably to write a dramatic power ballad about squirrels and breakfast trauma.

And you… you were sitting at the lake’s edge, legs dangling into the water, cigarette tucked between your fingers, the hem of your hoodie sleeves pushed over your knuckles.

Steve saw you from the campfire and didn’t hesitate this time.

He grabbed a fresh beer, the cigarette of his own between his lips, and made his way down the worn path to where you sat, the ground cool and quiet.

You didn’t flinch when he sat beside you. Just passed him the lighter without a word.

He lit up, took a drag, then glanced sideways. “You disappeared again.”

“I like the quiet,” you said softly, eyes still on the water. “Noise is good, but quiet doesn’t ask anything of you.”

He nodded. “I used to hate it. The quiet. Felt like it gave me too much space to think.”

“And now?”

“Now… I kinda want to hear what I’m thinking. Even if it’s weird or messy.”

You turned to him, head tilted. “That’s new for you.”

He smiled, a little self-conscious. “Yeah. Guess I’m a work in progress.”

You flicked ash into the water and looked away again. “Aren’t we all.”

Steve sat in silence with you for a moment, letting the air settle, watching how the sky colored your features in warmth.

Then, gently, “You meant it, didn’t you? Last night.”

You didn’t pretend not to know what he meant.

“I always mean it,” you said after a beat. “Drunk or not.”

“I’ve never had someone say stuff like that to me,” he said, eyes distant now. “Not like… not in a way that felt like it was for me, not just about me.”

You looked over at him, the softest thing in your expression — something fragile and unsure, but open.

“I saw you, Steve. That night. The party. And now. I just… I see you.”

Steve turned toward you completely, cigarette forgotten between his fingers. “And I want to see you.”

That caught you off guard.

You blinked.

“I mean it,” he said, voice rough from smoke and nerves. “I notice how you vanish when things get too close. I notice how you always help people but never let them help you. You care so much about everyone, but you don’t let anyone hold that same care for you.”

You swallowed hard.

“I don’t want to push,” he added quickly. “But I just… I don’t want to pretend I don’t see it.”

You were quiet, eyes on the ripples in the lake. Then, softly:

“It’s hard. Letting people in. When you’ve been… hurt. Or made small. Or told that being too much is something to be ashamed of.”

He nodded, gently. “Yeah. I get that.”

“But for what it’s worth… I don’t think you’re too much. I think you’re exactly enough. Even when you go quiet. Even when you disappear for a bit.”

That did something to you. You turned to him, eyes a little shinier than before, lips pressed in a thin line like you were holding something back.

Then, barely audible: “You see me, huh?”

Steve didn’t flinch. “Yeah. I do.”

You leaned your head against his shoulder, slow and cautious — like testing the weight of being known. And when he didn’t pull away, just exhaled slow and leaned his head gently against yours, you finally let your eyes close.

No more hiding.

Not tonight.

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It was supposed to be movie night.

Just a dumb horror marathon at Steve's house while his parents were away, junk food stacked on the coffee table, Vickie bringing popcorn nobody asked for, Eddie pretending to hate scary moviesand Robin jus being her usual self. You weren’t even sure why you came — probably because Robin begged, and Steve said, “C’mon, it’s fun when you’re there,” in that casual way that always made you wonder if he meant more.

By midnight, Eddie had fallen asleep with a half-eaten bag of Cheetos on his chest. Vickie and Robin had wandered off upstairs, whispering and trying not to be obvious. You were curled up under an old fleece blanket on the floor, your eyes stinging, head foggy from the wine you sipped too slowly for it to actually help.

Steve was still on the couch, legs sprawled, nursing his third beer. The glow from the TV flickered over his face, casting soft shadows under his eyes.

“You tired?” he asked suddenly, eyes shifting to you.

You nodded. “Kind of. Not tired enough to sleep, though.”

He made a low sound. “Yeah. Know that feeling.”

The movie had turned to credits, forgotten in the background.

You sat up, pulling the blanket tighter around your shoulders. “Want me to head out? I can walk home.”

Steve frowned instantly. “No. No way. It’s too late, and you’re buzzed. You can crash here.”

You looked at him carefully. “Are you sure?”

“I want you to,” he said simply, and something in his voice made your stomach twist.

So you stayed.

⸻

Sometime later, the lights were off, the room quiet. Everyone else was asleep or close enough. You lay beside Steve on the couch now, both of you sharing the blanket, not touching — but barely.

“You ever get scared when it’s quiet like this?” you asked into the dark.

Steve turned his head toward you. “Not of the quiet. But of what comes with it.”

You swallowed. “Yeah.”

He hesitated. “What scares you the most when everything’s quiet?”

You almost didn’t answer.

Then, voice low “That maybe this version of me—the one that makes people laugh and listens and brings the good wine—is the only version people want. That if I’m too much or too honest, they’ll just… leave.”

Steve exhaled slowly.

You weren’t looking at him when you said it, but when he spoke, his voice was close enough to feel.

“I wouldn’t.”

Your throat tightened.

You turned to face him in the dark, both of you just barely visible in the faint light from the streetlamp outside.

“I mean it,” he said. “I don’t care if you fall apart or go quiet or stop making poetic speeches every time we drink. You don’t have to be the ‘good’ version of you around me.”

You blinked, then whispered, “Then who do I have to be?”

Steve reached out — slow, unsure — and brushed a strand of hair off your cheek, his fingers warm and gentle. They lingered, just slightly, before falling away.

“Just you,” he said. “That’s enough.”

You didn’t say anything. You didn’t have to.

You just leaned your head against his shoulder, and he leaned gently into you.

No kisses. No confessions. Just warmth. Just presence.

And the soft, powerful truth of being seen in the dark — and not being afraid of it.

────────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ────────

The hum of the fluorescent lights above Family Video was especially irritating today. A storm had rolled through earlier, leaving the windows smudged with rain and the store with a damp, sleepy quiet.

Robin sat on the counter, lazily flipping through a stack of returned tapes, while Steve stood behind her, rewinding a copy of Pretty in Pink with one hand and nursing a lukewarm coffee in the other.

“God, this day is dragging,” Robin muttered. “We’ve had, like, three customers in four hours. I’m officially becoming part of the carpet.”

Steve didn’t answer.

She turned toward him, eyebrows raised. “You good?”

He nodded a little too quickly. “Yeah. I mean… I’m fine.”

Robin narrowed her eyes. “No, you’re weird. You’re doing that thing again.”

“What thing?” he asked defensively.

“That ‘staring-at-the-labels-but-not-seeing-them’ thing. The ‘I’ve-been-in-my-head-all-day’ thing. Is this about her?”

Steve looked up sharply.

Robin smirked. “Dingus. Come on. You think I didn’t notice the whole blanket-sharing, long-staring, lake-sitting, ‘oh-no-we-accidentally-touched-hands’ vibe happening between you two?”

Steve sighed, leaning on the counter beside her. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”

Robin grinned. “That’s how you know it’s good.”

“I mean it,” he said, quieter now. “She’s… different. I’ve never met someone who could just… undo me with a few words. And she doesn’t even try. She just is that way.”

Robin tilted her head. “And that’s a problem because…?”

“Because I want to be close to her,” Steve said. “But she’s still got these walls. I don’t want to push, but I also don’t want to wait around forever hoping she lets me in.”

Robin was quiet for a moment, tapping her fingers against the stack of tapes.

“You know,” she said slowly, “sometimes the only way someone lets you in is if you show them a door.”

Steve gave her a look. “That’s not a real saying.”

“It is now,” she shot back. “And guess what? You’re in luck. Because I happen to be a certified, government-licensed matchmaker.”

“You are not—”

“Hush. I’m scheming.” She slid off the counter and began pacing, deep in thought. “What you two need is time. But not group hangout time where Eddie’s talking about goblins or Vickie’s crying over documentaries. You need space where she doesn’t feel like she’s under a spotlight.”

Steve raised an eyebrow. “You’re planning a murder or a picnic?”

Robin smirked. “Both involve blankets and silence.”

Steve chuckled softly, but his heart was already racing a little.

Robin leaned back on the counter, arms crossed, eyes sparkling with purpose. “I’ll organize something low-key. Chill. No pressure. Just enough intimacy for something real to surface — or for you to accidentally hold her hand again.”

Steve smiled — truly smiled — for the first time that day.

“Thanks, Robs.”

“Don’t thank me yet,” she said. “Wait until you’re laying in the grass next to her again, trying not to fall in love.”

Steve looked away.

Too late.

────────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ────────

You weren’t exactly sure how it happened.

One minute you were at home, curled up with your book, and the next Robin was banging on your door with a plastic bag full of snacks and that too-sweet grin that meant she was up to something.

“Trust me,” she said, tossing a hoodie at you. “Dress cozy. We’re going somewhere.”

Fifteen minutes later, you found yourself in the back of Steve’s car — Eddie’s blanket stuffed in the trunk, a cooler full of stolen convenience store drinks in the backseat, and a portable radio Robin claimed she “borrowed” from her neighbor.

It wasn’t until Steve pulled the car into a quiet, grassy clearing just outside Hawkins — a place none of you ever really went — that it hit you.

This was a setup.

Robin, Vickie, and Eddie were all supposed to come. But somehow they mysteriously had other plans.

That left you and Steve.

Alone.

Under a sky spilling stars.

Robin didn’t even try to be subtle when she bailed last minute. She’d called it “giving the night some breathing room.”

Yeah, right.

⸻

Now it was just you and him.

The blanket was laid out across the grass. The drinks were opened. The radio played something soft and echoey in the background.

You both lay on your backs, staring up.

You pulled your hoodie sleeves over your hands again. It was quiet. Not the awkward kind. Just… open.

“I think she set us up,” you said finally.

Steve let out a soft laugh. “Oh, one hundred percent.”

You turned your head, saw the grin tugging at his lips.

“You mad?”

You shook your head slowly. “No. Just surprised.”

He glanced over at you, eyes soft. “Is it okay? Us being here? Just us?”

You didn’t answer right away. Then: “Yeah. It’s… nice.”

A beat passed.

He leaned back again. “I don’t do this often, you know.”

“Lay in fields and get tricked into stargazing?”

Steve chuckled. “No. I mean—try this hard to get closer to them for someone who isn’t even mine.”

That made your chest tighten.

You turned toward him again. “Why me, then?”

He looked at you.

And for once, he didn’t soften it with a joke.

“Because you say things that stay with me. Because you care without making it a performance. Because even when you vanish a little… I still want to find you.”

Your breath caught.

There was silence again. But this time it pulsed.

“I’m not used to people wanting to find me,” you said, your voice quiet, raw.

“I know,” he replied. “That’s why I keep showing up.”

Neither of you moved. Neither of you said it, but it was there — the weight, the want, the fear.

Then Steve nudged his hand slightly across the blanket, his pinky brushing yours.

He didn’t hold your hand.

He just made sure you knew it was there.

And you let it stay.

────────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ────────

The stars above felt too endless to speak under — like anything said here would echo for miles, held by the night itself.

Steve hadn’t moved his hand. Neither had you.

That small point of contact, that barely-there pinky touch, was the loudest thing between you.

You let the quiet stretch, let it wrap around you until you could finally breathe out the words that had been clawing at your chest for longer than you could admit.

“I used to write letters to people I never sent,” you said suddenly, eyes still on the sky.

Steve turned slightly, watching you now.

“Things I couldn’t say out loud. Apologies. Confessions. Sometimes just stuff I wished someone had told me when I was younger. I’d keep them folded in a box under my bed like they meant something.”

Steve didn’t interrupt.

You continued, voice softer now.

“One of them was to someone who made me feel small for caring too much. For being the one who noticed everything. They made it seem like it was a weakness. Like feeling deeply was embarrassing.”

Steve’s jaw clenched, but he stayed still.

“I think I learned to build walls right after that,” you admitted. “Because if no one can reach you, they can’t ruin you.”

A breeze moved through the grass. You didn’t shiver, but something inside you trembled.

“And yet,” you added with a hollow laugh, “here I am. Letting some guy brush his hand against mine like it’s the safest thing in the world.”

Steve’s voice was steady when he spoke. “I’m not gonna ruin you.”

“I know,” you said. “That’s what scares me.”

You turned to him then — fully, your eyes meeting his in the dark.

“I think I don’t know what to do with people who actually stay. People who don’t run when they see the real stuff.”

He leaned in, just slightly.

“Then let me be the one who stays.”

Not a promise. Not a plea.

Just a truth.

A breath passed between you. You didn’t kiss. You didn’t reach for more.

You just looked at him — really looked — and let him see you back.

Then, after a moment, you asked, almost teasing but not quite:

“Would you want to read one of the letters sometime?”

Steve smiled, soft and slow, like it reached somewhere deep in him.

“I’d want to read all of them.”

You looked back up at the sky.

And for the first time in a long time, it didn’t feel too quiet anymore.

────────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ────────

The blanket had been folded. The drinks packed away. The grass had left damp prints on your jeans, and the stars still clung to your skin like a secret.

You slid into the passenger seat, hoodie pulled tight around you, hair wind-tousled from the night. Steve got in on the other side, keys jingling as he started the car.

The radio picked up mid-song — something low and nostalgic. Fleetwood Mac, maybe. Something you both knew but wouldn’t admit you liked.

“I can’t believe Robin tricked me into this,” you said, half-laughing.

Steve grinned as he pulled onto the road. “You loved it.”

You gave a dramatic sigh. “Maybe. Still rude, though.”

“She’s persistent. I think she’s emotionally invested in our love lives.”

“Pretty sure she’s just bored.”

Steve glanced over at you. “She’s not wrong, though.”

You raised a brow. “About what?”

He shrugged, smile still tugging at his lips. “That it’s different with you.”

You looked out the window, trying to hide the warmth rising in your cheeks. “Yeah. It is.”

⸻

The road was quiet, passing under pools of moonlight. Your shoulders had relaxed. You were tapping your fingers gently on your thigh to the rhythm of the music, and Steve kept catching himself looking over.

“You know what I was thinking?” he said.

“That you’re gonna stop and get me fries?”

He laughed. “Okay, yes, but also—”

“Wait, was that a yes?”

Steve chuckled. “Yes, but also�� you don’t seem like the kind of person who lets people in easily. And yet… I feel like I’m already inside.”

You turned to him, caught off guard. His hands were still on the wheel, eyes on the road, but that vulnerability in his voice was unmistakable.

“You are,” you admitted softly. “Maybe not all the way, but… you’re somewhere important.”

Silence.

But it wasn’t heavy. It was full. Charged.

⸻

By the time he pulled into your driveway, the song on the radio had faded into a commercial you both ignored.

He didn’t turn off the engine.

You didn’t move to open the door.

You sat there, both quiet.

Then you turned to him, voice softer now. “Thanks for tonight. Even if it was a setup.”

“I’d let Robin trap me like that every week if it meant more nights like this,” he said.

You bit back a smile. “Careful, Harrington. You’re sounding dangerously close to romantic.”

He leaned across the console a little, the space between you narrowing, breath warming the air.

“I could be, you know,” he said. “If you let me.”

You met his eyes. “I think I’m ready to try.”

And then—

You kissed him.

It wasn’t perfect. His nose bumped yours, your hands were still cold, and the console made it awkward — but it was real.

Soft. Brave. Just a little shaky.

Like the beginning of something built slow and strong.

When you finally pulled back, forehead brushing his, you whispered, “Just so you know… I’m still scared.”

Steve smiled, his thumb gently brushing your cheek.

“That’s okay,” he whispered back. “I’ll stay anyway.”

────────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ────────

You’d written hundreds of letters before.

Some were angry, some desperate, some shaped like poetry or nothing at all. You never sent them. You weren’t supposed to. They were just for you — a way to let the ache out and trap it somewhere else.

But this one?

This one was different.

This one had Steve’s name on it.

It was folded carefully, sealed with a scrap of tape. No envelope. No address. Just his name, written in your handwriting — slightly tilted, always a little too careful.

You gave it to him on a quiet Wednesday afternoon. Family Video was slow, the rain had been soft all morning, and you’d swung by with coffee under the excuse of boredom.

Steve smiled when he saw you, hair a little messy, name tag crooked.

“You always bring the good kind,” he said, taking the coffee. “It’s like you know me or something.”

You rolled your eyes, pulling the letter from your jacket pocket and holding it out.

“What’s this?” he asked, frowning curiously.

You didn’t look at him. “Something I usually never give anyone.”

He sobered at your tone. Took it gently. “You want me to read it now?”

You hesitated. Then nodded.

So he did.

Right there behind the counter, leaning against the cash register, Steve unfolded the paper and began to read.

Dear Steve,

I never meant to let anyone in. Not really.

I got good at listening so I wouldn’t have to speak. I got good at asking questions so I wouldn’t have to answer any. And most people are fine with that. Most people don’t look closer.

But you did.

You noticed things I didn’t think anyone saw. You made space for me in ways no one else ever tried to. You didn’t ask me to open up — you just kept showing up. Again and again.

You made me feel safe.

That night at the lake, I felt seen. And it terrified me. And it made me feel alive. Both at once. You were patient with me, even when I gave you nothing back but half-smiles and smokes and silence.

This isn’t a love letter. Not yet. It’s a thank you.

For not asking me to be anything other than myself.

And for making me want to be brave enough to let someone stay.

– Yours. In whatever way that means to you.

Steve didn’t move for a long time.

He stared at the paper, reading it twice, then folding it with impossible care like it was something fragile.

When he looked up at you, his eyes were glassy.

“You meant this?” he asked quietly.

You nodded.

“I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t have to,” you said, stepping closer. “It was never about getting a response. I just… I wanted you to have something real.”

Steve reached forward, cupped your cheek gently, thumb brushing the edge of your jaw.

“You’re the bravest person I know.”

You leaned into his touch, eyes soft, breath shallow.

And then he kissed you again — this time slower, deeper, more sure. Like the letter had told him everything he’d needed to know, and now he could finally answer without words.

When he pulled back, he pressed his forehead against yours and whispered:

“Yours, too.”

[angels-heap]

Asides from the whole age gap valhoun discourse, why do you actually ship them? Like whats their dynamic im genuinely curious,,, i probably dont see it bc i cant see it as a cannon thing bc when I get interested in smth i often find myself sticking close to cannon unless its an AU

Oh yeah, valhoun's about as canon as freehoun (which is to say, Valve 100% did not intend for anyone to ship these two), but I'm a multishipper at heart despite being a canon stickler elsewhere. I think it's fun to imagine how Barney and Alyx would interact if they were put into Situations or if they spent more time together in canon. I've talked about the appeal of valhoun before (specifically here, here, and here that I could find), and other folks have also shared their thoughts. To summarize:

Unlike Gordon, Alyx and Barney are both (relatively) fleshed-out characters with known voices, mannerisms, personalities, and motivations. They don't seem to know each other well in canon, but this is never stated outright, so there's lots of room for interpretation. They're both a bit goofy/snarky, so there's potential for some excellent banter between them, and I personally find it easier to get into their heads (relative to Gordon's) and imagine them interacting for writing purposes, since I don't have to start from scratch.

Despite their age gap, Barney and Alyx have a lot in common and a lot to bond over (arguably more than other popular pairings; see the "none of us are free of sin" venn diagram). They've spent the same amount of time living on Combine-occupied earth and lost a significant chunk of their lives (Alyx's childhood; Barney's young adulthood) under Combine rule. They're both uniquely connected to Black Mesa and the resonance cascade. Perhaps most importantly, they're both involved with the Resistance, albeit in very different capacities, which entails shared goals and loyalties.

Because of their age gap, they're bound to encounter situational or interpersonal conflicts, which are an essential component of any compelling story. For instance, Barney remembers things and people from the Before Times that Alyx doesn't, but probably desperately wants to — possibly including her late mother. Alyx is optimistic and resilient in a way that Barney never will be but may find refreshing, because despite her best efforts, she can't fully comprehend what was lost and thus has not developed the same bitterness. I can also see her canonical empathy and naivete coming into play in a relationship with Barney (or anyone else, for that matter). I've said before that she approaches him like he's a stray dog she wants to rescue, and he regards her like a gift he doesn't deserve (that might also be a ticking time bomb). While I could go on for hours, I think that about sums it up.

There's potential for a whole "star-crossed lovers" dynamic here, if you squint. Whether they're just friends, or they're in love, or they're just hooking up to try and feel something, the fact remains that they can't develop any sort of meaningful relationship while Barney's undercover and Alyx is such a valuable Combine target. Any interactions between them are likely to be fleeting and dangerous and/or public. I like to imagine they're mutually attracted to one another, and they try to make it work for a while, but they end up taking one too many risks and someone (probably Barney) calls it off after a close call. Maybe they rekindle things post-canon, or maybe they don't. It's a choose your own adventure where the adventure is delicious angst. And on that note...

Valhoun can exist between HL1 and HL2 canon. Honestly, a big part of the appeal of valhoun to me as a writer is that it gives me an excuse to explore what all our favorite characters were up to while Gordon was in stasis. What was the Resistance working on in the years leading up to Gordon's return? How did Barney seemingly become Dr. Kleiner's personal bodyguard? How's he holding up mentally in such a miserable situation, and what does his job actually entail? What was it like for Alyx to come of age as one of the youngest people alive, surrounded by middle-aged scientists? How did those experiences shape her into the person we meet in HL2? Sure, we don't necessarily need a shipping angle to explore these things, but interpersonal relationships are a big part of the human experience, so a little sprinkle of valhoun adds some extra flavor.

Alyx and Barney are both hot. That's not the whole appeal, or even the main appeal, but it's worth mentioning. I am a filthy bisexual and I want to make the hot dolls kiss. So sue me.

I'm not arguing that valhoun is the "best" HL ship or even my favorite ship, but it's got plenty of room for humor, angst, and character development and hot people kissing. I hope this post helps other folks see my/our vision and get on board. A little variety is good for any fandom ecosystem. :)

[marias-wonderland]

im really glad you liked my ask!!!! :D im a fellow fic writer (sometimes) and i had ideas for writing but honestly i just was too scared to put my thoughts into paper ૮(˶ㅠ︿ㅠ)ა i would also love to see your poems posted because i used to find peace in poetry back in the day even though i never put any effort into it, it was just me expressing myself (　◕‿◕✿) that cringe part really hit with me tho i had bad experiences with people making fun of things i like and i even considered them my friends ｡･(ू˃̣̣̣̣̣̣ ꞈ˂̣̣̣̣̣̣ ू) also try to think better of yourself, youre not that bad and have a unique set of skills and deserve way better stuff than you think you do (≧∇≦)/ i am sure you have found people and will find people who will love you for who you are and have been are and will cherish you so please be kind to yourself and treat yourself to nice things ＼(★^∀^★)／

(no I'm not giving free handjobs, I'm simply too excited about another mega super special awesome anon ask!!)

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

my reaction rn

cus 1 anon ask was already too much, for this one idk

at this point i will be communicating my thoughts through tumblr pictures. also the second one is me hopping all around the house cus i was giddy THANKS TO THIS AWESOME MESSAGE!!!!1ONE

Alright, back to using words!

Look, we all have been there. feeling as if everyone and their mother writes better stuff than we do. and to a degree is true. sure there are people, both professionals and amateur writers, who write "better" than we do (highly subjective stand if you ask me).

So what?

Just because there's a stephen king out there, chugging out books in a heartbeat, doesnt mean that i shouldnt be posting on the internet my fanfics or my poetry or my clay charms or my cat licking his balls.

We use art to express ourselves/have fun/ study our deepest parts of ourselves/ create porn with our characters because official writers are cowards (hirano i see you...)

As for your friends.. well, they werent the brightest ornament on the christmas tree!! theres no need to put down people with different interests than your own! simply accept the differences and move on or find new people. besides, whats this? the late 90's??

"did you hear about that neeerd?? he reads and writes instead of partying! ewwww"

I thought we moved on past this empty-brained teenage behavior...

share your poetry! and you really prompted me to share mine in here! idk how many people will like it (even 1 will be enough xD) but what the hell, I've seen worse stuff in here.

Just like I deserve nice stuff, you also deserve the same if not a greater amount of mega special awesome stuff sprinkled with sugar!!

too bad idk your account so i could spam you with hearts and memes!

Nevertheless, hope you are having an awesome day!!! keep being awesome and anon-ish!!

[doriana-gray-games]

Collection of asks !

Hi! Don't want to clog up your dashboards so I am answering some asks that have piled up while I was a bit absent <3

(Game update status: both going good and bad. Stuck on this one scene, but I am starting to see the end in the tunnel lol. Have been trying a new approach where I don't edit while writing :0 it's hard but does increase productivity! I just hope the quality isn't too bad after it lol. You can tell me once the update is out haha!)

Bahaha Love that! W deserves all the love <3

😏😏😏 Watson likes all of Sherlock, tho I'm sure they are partial to some... parts hehe

But the reaction is not new!! Tho I know a lot of people miss it (there's a few easily missed things tbh haha, maybe not optimal, but I find it fun to hide little things). There's one reaction with small waist too !

lolol I see it. I have a scene in my notes where MC basically has to teach H to sit on (and touch) grass...

@jumpyhamster Maybe? Not sure yet, sorry!

Ah--was it so obvious i'm not english haha! Yeah, I might as well tell you all too (despite my best efforts of internet anonymity, I talk too much on discord lol) I am Swedish. So if I make some weird English mistake or miss some quintessential British thing the MC or NPCs would know plz let me know! <3

Aww I think I know who this is!!! 💛💛💛 hearts right back!!!!

@4332 <3<3<3 I'm so glad you liked it!! (I don't recommend it to 12 years old tho! might be too adult for that haha)

<3 <3 <3

I am for sandwich solidarity in all forms haha! XD

Hopefully MC will be able to get them a not-chewed on sandwich soon <3

It seems I can't paste more images sorry-- One similar question I got was what the elegant body type looks like:

Currently the body types won't assume a lot much more than the word and possibly synonyms to the word. That's because it's so subjective. So--if I were to make further content about it I probably will have to ask further questions about that setting <3 I do think it would be fun and interesting to do!

Elegant, is again, what you want it to mean. But generally I've heard it to mean semi-long limbs with "ideal" like proportions. And in mass perhaps somewhere between tall-athletic and lean. I personally think of grace kelly I think

Love this game and the new details you added <3 this is definitely a spoilery question but man, i gotta ask... what happened in Lestrade's life that to made him so... unhappy? Careless with his own wellbeing? :(

<3

A previous answer I have given: "Just a spiral of things. Life turning the wrong way, things looking bad on the horizon, failing to take care of themselves so they have poor chances of climbing out or realising they even can." In addition to this. This had not started when MC and L first met. And there was a catalyst event, that set it off, and in a way MC is involved in this.

💖💝💕💯💐

💕💕💕💕💕💕💕

you deserve to go to jail for making me choose between two cute love interests... that aside, your game has helped me a lot while struggling with mental health problems. which sounds a little silly but genuinely it warms my heart when i don't feel well. so thank you for creating something so wonderful. + i know most asks here are RO-related but im also very excited to see how the story goes!

Gosh Anon, you gave me a heart-attack with those first few words haha-- but to the rest, thank you so much <3<3<3 That's very sweet. I'm really glad and honoured to help in anyway I can. There's a lot of plot coming anon! Don't you worry! :D

harrypotternerd934 asked:

I need to say that I'm absolutely amoured by your story. I really enjoy playing as Sherlock and I think you did a really great job at capturing the vibe of the setting.

Much love and further luck with your story 🤗

@harrypotternerd934 <3

Aww, thank you so much! <3<3<3

approxtwelveangrybees asked:

I need you to know that I had so much fun with the Victorian gazing in the first two chapters

@approxtwelveangrybees <3<3<3

Congratulations on the anniversary <3 the update was so good.. all the little reworked scenes... the love kernels... But wait, will there actually be a love triangle route!!!!?

Yeees <3 Lot's of them <3

phaedraismyusername asked:

My favourite line of the update - just a top tier IQ drop right there 😍 lol

The whole thing was so good! An absolute joy to read as always ❤️❤️❤️

@phaedraismyusername <3<3<3 You're a joy!!! <3<3<3 (I love how people are discovering the thigh line haha)

and to "The trio Lestrade/hungry tumblr anon" Thank you for your story <3

[bubbledumbbinch]

Heya! Congrats on the 100+ followers!! Your writing is really good and I enjoy reading your works!

If you dont mind, what would be your headcanons on the TWST dorm leaders of what prefrences they have for a S/O? Like what would they want in an S/O? (Also Im sorry if this has already been asked Im also kinda new to your blog as well ;w;)

Hii!! And thank you 🥰🥺💕 that means a lot to me!! I hope you stay and continue to enjoy yourself here!This hasn’t been asked before so I hope you enjoy!!! ;w; I hope you all enjoy I had a fun time (and a difficult time) writing this out! I think I made it too long, again ;w;

I made this SFW uwu just some fluff!!!! But please keep in mind before you follow me, I MOSTLY POST NSFW works.

Warnings: slight story spoilers for episode 5, for Idia’s part, if u squint

Pairings: Dorm Leaders x Reader

I put things under a cut for length!!

Riddle Rosehearts

Riddle would probably want a partner who does well in school - at least someone who tries to! It would go against his own desires to do well in life if he has a partner who doesn’t have the drive to succeed like he does.

He isn’t particularly fond of people who have a lot of potential yet waste it on being lazy. Like I said before, it goes against his own morals.

I also see him wanting someone fun-loving! Riddle grew up in an environment where fun was essentially taboo so he would be drawn like a moth to a flame to someone who has so much energy in them. Remember one of his best childhood friends is Che’nya so he would probably not hate the idea of joking around and being silly once in a while!

Someone who would love sweets like him! Not too often so he could maintain his shape, but someone who would love to indulge him once in a while!

Riddle would love to see an S/O who makes time for him and the unbirthday parties that Heartslabyul hosts! He feels like a good dorm leader and seeing you make an effort to come makes him feel like a great boyfriend too!

“Ah, Y/N, I was afraid you wouldn’t be able to make it today.” Riddle sighed to himself in relief. He feared his rose would come to the party late. “Ah, sorry Riddle! I was late because I was studying for Professor Crewel’s exam but I lost track of time!” You breathed out, a bit exhausted from running.

The redhead only nodded and smiled at you. “Don’t worry about it, my rose. We’ve only just begun the party, so no need to fret.” Riddle’s gentlemanly ways never failed to make your heart soar. “No no, I’ll make it up to you! I’ll bake you a tart sometime, you’ll let me right?” You playfully nudged at your boyfriend’s arm and smirked.

Riddle could only blush furiously. “Th-that would not be a bad idea. I suppose I would accept the gift graciously, dear, but only if we can cook it together. I believe it would be beneficial to both of us to learn!”

Leona Kingscholar

Someone who loves to nap with him like all the time

Leona would definitely want someone who is willing to praise him a lot. Growing up he never really had that and felt like he was overshadowed by his big brother, so this guy needs validation like crazy. Tell him how strong he is, how much you love him, how warm he is… he’ll scoff and look away but you could see the faintest blush on his cheeks. He secretly loves it.

I feel like Leona would like bratty tsunderes, for some reason. He would be the perfect teasing type for them and I think I can just picture Leona and his S/O getting into play fights that lead to something more, if you catch my drift.

Someone who can be ��refined” enough for show so that when he brings you home to his family, they can accept you fully. The last thing he wants is his family pestering him about how his potential mate isn’t a good fit.

As tough as he may be he def wants someone at the end of the day to stroke his head and calm him down after a long and stressful day.

“Oi, herbivore, come here and be my pillow.” Leona’s gruff voice broke the silence of his room. He was sitting up on his bed while you studied on his desk. Giggling, you made your way into his bed, crawling over to where he was. Leona pushed your torso down gently and started nuzzling his head on your chest, and you could feel the vibrations coming from his body that was like a low growl. Or was it purring?

“Of course, anything for my big strong boyfriend, the best Magift player in the school, my one and only love~” you endlessly praised him, smiling at him as if he were a rare diamond. Leona only huffed as he wrapped his muscular arms around your form, effectively preventing you from leaving.

“Tch…. Damn right….” Leona mumbled. “Why don’t you tell me more while I start drifting to sleep?” Leona smirked. Running your fingers through his hair carefully, you obliged, feeling Leona’s breathing become more calm as you continued.

Azul Ashengrotto

Azul would ALSO want someone who praises him, due to his years of being bullied. Call him beautiful, smart, tell him he’s the most cunning man on campus. He EATS IT UP. This man will swear on his life for you.

He also would want someone who has the ability to work hard… what? The Mostro Lounge needs extra workers sometimes! Azul thinks that if he can own the lounge, manage contracts, AND study hard for school, his S/O should be able to match him!

I can see Azul absolutely praising/spoiling his S/O too. Since you give him so much happiness in his life he should pay it forward, no? What would you like, a new dress/suit? A new piece of jewelry?

Someone !!! Loyal!!! Azul wants someone who he can feel secure with in a relationship, so he probably wouldn’t want you to flirt with anybody else since his insecurities will SPARK UP like crazy!

Azul wants someone who loves him for who he is, unconditionally!

“Angelfish… hello, good evening. I’m sorry if I am a bit more tired than usual, I just finished with ordering more inventory for the lounge and dealing with some paperwork.” Azul sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose. You dropped your bags on one of the chairs of the VIP room and walked over slowly to your octomer boyfriend. Bringing your arms to his shoulders, you slowly begin to knead and massage his arms gently. Azul groaned at the contact, muscles aching.

“How is this, Azul? I know how hard you work, you deserve to take a break too, sometimes…” you spoke gently into his ear, kissing the shell of it. The contact gave him slight goosebumps. “Ah, I would love to but, I have so much more to do… I know it’s going to be a late night for me, so why don’t you head on to sleep?” You tsked, upset with his answer. “I know it’s late Azul, that’s why I’m here. You know, if you keep doing this you’ll get wrinkles, right?”

“Ahem! Well. Then, this might be a good place to stop if that’s the case…” Azul huffed, standing up quickly to retire to his room, you in tow.

Kalim Al-Asim

Kalim wants someone who is cheerful! They may not be a ray of sunshine like he is, but I honestly can’t picture him with someone smug/gloomy. Kalim might be dense but he isn’t THAT stupid. I think he would be able to notice if you were upset which makes him upset.

Someone who is down for anything, Kalim would love to take you on a ride on his magic carpet at random hours of the day so be prepared to drop whatever you’re doing if you want to appease your impulsive boyfriend!

A fun loving person for sure, who isn’t super self conscious about what people think. If he asks you to dance with him he would really love for you to join! He wouldn’t want you to say something like, “oh, but I’m a bad dancer…” Kalim would shake his head and ask you why you would say that! It’s all about having a fun time together, right?

A patient lover is what Kalim would want as well, someone who’s kind, too. At the end of the day when Kalim is ready to sleep after his crazy antics, he wants a partner he can be able to lay next to and feel like himself.

Someone who loves him even if he weren’t rich, Kalim would want someone for their personality and not materialistic things or beauty. Kalim sees someone for their heart ! (*´꒳`*)

You yawned heavily while rubbing your eyes. Was that a tapping noise coming from the window? “Ugh…. What time is it?” Checking your phone, you saw it was 1:30am. You also had a text from Kalim.

*tap tap tap*

You groggily walked over to the window and opened the curtains to see Kalim sitting on his magic carpet with the biggest grin upon seeing you. Opening the window, you giggled lightly. “Good evening Kalim, fancy seeing you here so late.”

“Hi, Y/N!! I woke up and felt bored so, you wanna join me on a night ride around campus?” Kalim practically beamed at you, even this late at night. His smile never failed to make your heart flutter. The boy’s positive energy also transferred to you, effectively waking you up.Stepping onto the carpet from your window was your answer. After getting situated, you kissed Kalim’s cheek and held his hand. “Of course Kalim, I would love to.”

Vil Schoenheit

Someone who can tough out his callous words and treatment. Vil might be a bit much, but the reason why he does this is because he does it with the goal of ultimately helping you. He only wants to see the best out of people, including but not limited to his little sweet potato!

Someone who is patient. He knows he checks who the most beautiful person is quite often and he doesn’t do it to annoy you, it’s just for his own personal validation issues. Lay a hand on his arm, back, or head to give him praises and let him know he’s beautiful to you no matter what.

Someone who is willing to pepper him lightly with kisses (not the face though, he has makeup on!). He definitely eats it up and loves it so much, he feels like you are treating him like a king. He’ll pay that back tenfold and give you beauty treatments, it’ll feel like you’re at the spa on a weekday!

Vil is constantly posting on Magicam, depending on whether you’re comfortable enough to be posted on there he would want to make sure you are okay with him constantly taking photos to be posted on there. Whether it be food you cooked, matching couples outfits, or even pictures of you without makeup, be ready to face comments of all sorts coming from his fans.

“Mira Mira on my phone… Currently, who is the most beautiful of all?” You heard Vil speak outside of his room. Currently you sat on the small chaise at the foot of his bed. Vil told you he needed to step out for a second, so you could get ready for bed now. After putting on your sleeping clothes, Vil finally came back in, seeming more irritated than before. His eyebrows furrowed and his body looked tense.

“Vil, are you alright?” You questioned him as you made your way to his bed, slipping under the covers. Vil only sighed and exchange a quick “Mm.” as he changed into his pajamas and came to join you. He was turned so his back was facing you and he was a bit distant. You knew he didn’t get the answer he wanted when he got those search results back. You didn’t know how to convince your boyfriend otherwise but you decided you needed to talk to him.

“Vil, darling…” you spoke gently as you nuzzled closer, your chest pressing into his back. Your arm wrapped around him to pull him closer, to which he responded with finally relaxing in your touch. “You’re one of the best things that’s happened to me, Vil, I don’t know if you realize how lucky I am to have such a loving, caring, and talented boyfriend like you. Your beauty is simply the cherry on top of the person I fell in love with. To me, you’re perfect. I love you.” You ended your tangent by placing a gentle kiss on his shoulder, dozing off.

You couldn’t see Vil but he trembled lightly as tears silently fell down his face. “Thank you… I love you too, my sweet potato.” Vil whispered into his pillow. With you, he always felt like the most beautiful person.

Idia Shroud

Personality wise, I don’t think Idia would be picky. He’s a shy person and honestly would be surprised he could get an S/O at all! So is Ortho!

Speaking of Ortho, Idia wants someone who is kind and loving to his little brother. Knowing his partner loves his brother would only make him fall for you harder!

Probably someone who would give Idia his own space until he finally felt comfortable and wanted to take it further, he would prob take a few days to even kiss you!!!

Idia wants someone to be his player 2 :) like actually, come over and game with him and he’ll probably be the happiest boy ever.

Big big bonus if you love anime, cosplay, gaming, etc. It’s one thing to be an otaku like Idia but when he has a partner to fully indulge in his interests with?? It’s a win-win situation for everyone! He wants to do a couple cosplay one day if he gets the courage to ask you.

Someone who won’t pressure him too much. If you remember how Riddle pressured Idia into trying to speak publicly, you know how much of a scary situation it put Idia in, even though he was able to do it. Stressing him out is just gonna make him unhappy :(

Someone who enjoys spending as much time inside as he does! I’m not talking a hikikomori but someone who wouldn’t be opposed to staying inside with him 99.9% of the time lol

“Y-Y/N-shi, would you like to g-go on a date with me soon?” Idia fumbled with his fingers, looking away as he asked you. You raised an eyebrow. “Oh? Idia, this is the first time you asked me to ‘go on a date’. Don’t tell me, are we actually going out somewhere?!”

“Eek! D-don’t be ridiculous, Y/N!!” He almost screeched the words out. Suddenly he pulled out a couple of VR headsets with hand controllers, and handed one to you. “Fuhehe, I just made a bunch of simulation locations. We could go to the park, a restaurant, even an amusement park..!” He grinned showing off his teeth.

You giggled at Idia’s enthusiasm, loving the way he gets after speaking about his own creations. “What a wonderful idea, Idia. Maybe we could take Ortho to the ‘amusement park’ too? We’ll be a big family.” You mused. Idia’s face brightened and a faint pink tinge covered his cheeks.

“F-family, huh? Ah, Y-Y/N-shi…. That would be n-nice…” Idia blushed as he considered what the future would bring for the both of you.

Malleus Draconia

Malleus would also mostly not have preferences on a person’s personality. Like, he wouldn’t say something like: “I want someone shy vs someone bold.” Anything his child of man does is interesting to him and he’s entranced by you!

That being said, Malleus would not tolerate rudeness, disrespect to him, Lilia, or his fellow dorm mates, etc. He may love you but he values those bonds more, especially Lilia’s and his grandmother’s.

Malleus wants someone who is willing to teach him human tendencies, since he is curious about them. Malleus will also probably never stop asking you about your life in the previous world, and listen passionately as you describe the hobbies you had, family members, etc.

As long as you continue to love and treat Malleus like a normal person and with kindness, he will continue to love you endlessly. He’s so unused to it that he will feel so special as you only coo in awe instead of fear away, if he showed you a magic trick or maybe donned more of his draconic features like his tail or long claws.

You walked with Malleus under the bright moonlight in the woods near Ramshackle dorm. His height and charm never failed to impress you. And his face, he was so very handsome. His striking green eyes always made you feel hypnotized and his horns were so well taken care of, you almost wanted to reach out and-

“Hm, Child of Man… you do know it’s quite rude to stare, yes?” Malleus chuckled and suddenly broke the silence, making you gasp. “Ah, sorry Tsunotarou. I-,” searching your thoughts, you just couldn’t think of anything quickly enough. “I just couldn’t help myself. You’re very attractive.” You murmured, admitting defeat.

“Oh? Do I not intimidate you, my dear? Usually humans and even other fae fear my features and tend to shy away…” Malleus looked down in thought as he continued walking. You wrapped yourself around one of his arms as he walked, effectively stopping him in his place. “Well, you don’t intimidate me! I like being around you, so, let’s keep it that way. I want to stay with you for a long time so don’t get too tired of me okay, Malleus?”

Hearing you say his given name only made the fae’s heart beat harder in his chest. Surely you knew what you did to him. He smiled down at you, green eyes softening in your gaze.

“I assure you I won’t, little human.”

[multiverse-of-pizza-time]

Guys, I need a minute

To talk about the absolute OUTPOURING OF LOVE I have received since starting this blog. Not only have I reached 50% of the following I received on my main blog ages ago, which I ran for YEARS to get that many followers, I have done so in the matter of just a month. 

I credit this in large part to @doctorstrangeaskblog, who both encouraged me to give this whole thing a shot and who gave me a lot of exposure by sharing their well-deserved spotlight. I feel a bit as though I’m just riding on their coattails, so if you don’t follow them YOU SHOULD. GO DO IT.

To be perfectly up front, this was in my own mind going to be my “last hurrah” of RPing. A last chance to enjoy a hobby I have loved since I was about 11. Over the years people I have written with have come and gone, but I remember all of them. The things I’ve written with them mean an immeasurable amount to me. Within the last year or so, all my remaining threads had basically dried up, as most of my writing partners during the pandemic got back to their lives. I myself knew I would soon be busy with not one but 2 new jobs coming up. Still, I wanted to do use the time I had before then to do something I loved one more time before I gave it up for good.  For ages, RPing has been a form of escapism for me from the struggles of my real-world life. It’s been a shelter and a source of inspiration and strength, as well as a way I’ve made a lot of friends over the years. Previously, I had been very private about RPing, since I honestly believed for so long I was a bad writer. Before this blog, it was something I did more privately on tumblr (without tags) or in Google Docs, and yes, back in the day, on MSN Messenger/ IM. At this point, I’m still not convinced I’m really a very good writer, but I am convinced other people at least find what I’m doing here fun, and that’s good enough. If other people get enjoyment out of what I make, I am happy to share it :).

That being said, this was never meant to take off like this, and I never could have predicted or expected it would... I fully intended to retire this blog quietly after my real job TM started, or even earlier. 

But in truth I’m more excited about RPing than I have been in probably more than a year. 

So... I’m not quitting for good. I’m not even planning to go on hiatus. Obviously as my workload changes I might not be on as frequently or able to write as much... but I’m having fun with this and I want to keep at it as long as I’m enjoying the ride. I hope I can continue to make content people like here, though I do have summer job #1 starting up next week... followed by a 2 week or so vacation out of the country, followed by more permanent job starting the week following that. 8′D (Not to mention part of me does want to produce some new content for that other blog, even if only as a labor of love.)

So in summary, I want to thank each and every one of you who has asked a question, reblogged, or liked something I’ve written. It’s incredibly validating to feel like this time and effort hasn’t just been the dying embers of my cherished memories of RPing and imagining and having fun with writing characters, but perhaps even just the beginning of the next step in that part of my creative journey.  Oh, and especially to that person who sent me their extra Multiverse of Madness movie poster... a very special thanks to you, you know who you are <3. If I give up on finding love and just start a Benedict Cumberbatch-based religion, this is the first thing going in the shrine LOL XD

Lots of love to all of you, and again, from the bottom of my extremely sentimental and sappy heart, thank you all SO SO MUCH for giving me something to smile about. I’m glad I fell into this tumblrverse <3 - Callie (AKA Pizza-Mun)

[ablackfangirlwrites]

Jealous ll

Part 2!!!! I linked the sone again cause its a bop and I love it also heres pt one!

You had had enough

Thats what you kept telling yourself

As you got ready tonight

You weren't going sit in the house anymore waiting for keigo to show up whenever he felt like it

Tonight you were going out for you

You thought about how you used to have fun, how you used to be happy

And how miserable you had been lately and you decided

If Keigo didnt appreciate you anymore

Then you'd find someone who would

So thats why you found yourself looking in the mirror admiring how well you dressed up tonight to go out

You almost forgot how hot you were when you put in a little effort

You had originally stopped because keigo would tell you how beautiful and perfect you were without make up or anything

But now you were on the prowl for someone new to notice you and keigo's words meant little to nothing to you right now

Tonight you were gonna find someone to show you just a little bit of attention you craved so much and it wasnt going to be keigo

Just then you saw keigo staring at you from the reflection in mirror

he was home unusually eailer

"Dont you have to work?" You asked bitterly

"Where are you going?" He asked ignoring your statement

Sighed and rolling your eyes and picking up your purse you turned to him before leaving the bedroom, "Out. You don't have to wait up for me."

"You're being ridiculous y/n."

He said following you but you ignored him

"Y/n? Y/n?" He kept calling you, "You cant just go out an-"

"And why not?" You turned to him before you left the apartment, "according to you were not even really dating-"

"You know why that is." He told you seriously

You huffed out a fake laugh, "yeah, but its still okay for you to flirt with anyone?"

Keigo didnt respond to that making you chuckle, "Exactly...like I said im going out dont wait up." Then you slammed the door leaving.

You knew you were being unreasonable with him

You knew the two of you needed to just talk and make up

But you kept letting your anger from all your arguments cloud your judgment

Because you just wanted him to feel the same hurt and jealously you had been feeling more then anything

Keigo stared at the door you had just slammed

Things somehow got worse in the following days after your argument on your anniversary

You refused to talk to him

He tried to apologize to you but you basically brushed him off

Keigo wasn't sure what to think you said you hated him, you wouldnt sleep in the bed with him

Yet you hadn't packed up and left so that was good right?

But that distance that was growing between the two of you was wider then before

And he didnt know what to do to fix it

And now you were going out clearly dressed to find someone else

Did you really hate him? Had you really had enough of him?

Hell, he couldnt even blame you if you did he thought

You had put up with so much of him up until now

And maybe some of what you said the other night was true? Had he gotten too comfortable with you always being there?

But that was only because he loved you

Keigo was truly in love with you, and dispite you suspensions he never cheated on you

And he would never do that, you were the only one he wanted even now when you two seemed to be at each others throats

He still wanted you, and he couldn't picture his life without you

So thats why he ended up following you to the bar you were currently at

He made sure you hadnt noticed him staying in the back out of your sight

And he hated what he saw

He saw you having fun

You had met up with some of your girlfriends the three of you all laughing and drinking

You acting like you didnt have a care in the world, like the two of you didnt argue before you left out

Having a good time as if you didnt leave him alone in the house

He watched you dancing as though you were having the time of your life as other mean stared and gawked at you

He watched as a guy singled you out and was clearly flirting with you

And worst you let him and was encouraging him

You kept touching his shoulder laughing at his jokes letting him dance against you

Words couldnt describe the irritation he felt watching

He wanted nothing more then to rip that mans hands off you and fly away with you in his arms

But part of him felt like he deserved this

This feeling he had, was it how you felt?

If so he needed to fix this, was all that he could think

And he was about to go to you, but before he could someone called out his name

"Hey! Hawks is here!"

Fuck he said to himself when a crowd started to form around him

His eyes then connected with yours knowing you heard he was here

And for a moment he thought you were gonna come up to him

But instead you kept talking to the random guy ignoring him

Hawks wanted to go to you and talk to just take you back home

But was having trouble getting away from the crowd

He was all smiles talking to his fans but the whole time he kept his eyes on you

But somehow it became a battle to see who was going to be more stubborn

You continued to dance with the random guy, but now you knew keigo was here watching you

You convinced yourself not to care, you came here to have fun and he wasnt going to ruin it for you

But thats just what he was doing as you watched him talk to some random girl now

He was here to get under you skin, you were sure of it

But two could play this little game

Both of you having this little war with each other watching each other from across the room

And you couldnt lie you were enjoying it a bit

Seeing his eyes watching you, knowing he had to be feeling the sting of jealousy as another man held you close

But It all came to a head when you saw the girl he was dancing with lips on his neck

He wasnt looking at you when you saw that all his attention clearly on her

You couldn't deny the sharp feeling in your chest at the sight

And not wanting to see anymore you left the dance floor telling the guy you needed to go to the bathroom

Hawks pulled away from the handsy fan

Denying anymore of her advances

Yeah he had been trying to get under your skin now but thats was a bit much

But now when he looked up to find you again, only to see you were gone

His stomach sank

Where did you go? You had to had just seen that?

Did you leave with that guy? Hawks started to panic when he didnt seem him either

Where did you go? Why was he being so stupid just now? He should have just went to talk to you

Just then keigo noticed the guy you had been flirting with at the bar and went up to him

"The girl you were dancing with? Where'd she go?"

The guy looked at him like he was crazy "whats it too you?" He challenged him

But keigo wasnt in a playful mood and grabbed the man by the collar, "Answer the question asshole."

The guy quickly put his hands up in defeat, "she just said-

"Hawks?"

He heard his name called out and looked behing him to see you

"What are- you are so unbelievable." Yku shook your head storming off

You couldn't believe him he had the audacity to attack the guy you had been talking to

It didnt take much thought to figure out why

And it annoyed you to no end

So keigo could flirt and let girls kiss all over him but if you had a guy around you that was too much

He was such a hypocrite

You were angry your whole way back home

You stood in the mirror once you got back

But with a different feeling in your stomach then the feeling you had before you left

You felt defeated your plans of fun had been ruined and you felt like your back in the same spot you had been in

Hawks was giving you a little bit of space taking his time getting back home

Because now you were probably madder than before at him

When hr got in he saw you had just got out the shower

"Y/n..."

You heard him call out your name But you ignored him

Y/n, you have to listen to me."

You werent going to turned around but before you knew it he hugged you from behind

"Im sorry."

"Let go of me hawks." You spat out but he didnt budge

"Just listen to me y/n..."

"Why are we doing this to each other?" You asked quietly, "Why do you keep hurting me? What are we even doing? It clearly isnt wor-"

"Ive been an idiot, y/n."

Keigo buried his face in your neck, "I've been so stupid, but please please dont leave me."

You were trying to fight back tears, "I dont want to leave you keigo....but I cant-"

"Dont say you can't with me anymore. I need you." Keigo pleaded holding you tighter

You were so frustrated

You still loved him, you still wanted to be with him, because when things are good between you they're great

But the way your relationship had been it was becoming too much

But you wanted to stay with him

Because you loved him

You moved your hands and held on to his arms secretly enjoying his embrace that you missed so much

"I know you mean well keigo-"

"I love you so much y/n," keigo cut you off again, "I know ive been an asshole, ive been neglectful, ive been the worst, but dont give up on me. Please."

You finally turned around to face him and hugged him back

You could see the sincerity in his eyes as you did "I love you too keigo but I just cant do this- we keep hurting each other...thats not what your supposed to do to the people you love."

Keigo pulled back "You want me to tell everyone about us? I will." He told you, "You want me to tell you everything ive been doing I will, I promise you Ill to whatever it takes to fix us. I dont want to live the way we have anymore."

You knew he was serious and your heart leaped hearing his words but you werent sure

"You're the only one I want y/n" he said giving you a light kiss

Almost like he was asking for permission

"Ill do whatever it takes for you to forgive me."

He said inbetween kisses, "you're so important to me, im sorry i made you think you weren't."

You couldnt lie he was finally saying everything you wanted to hear

And you wanted to believe him

"You promise?" You asked him

"I promise."

[damn-stark]

I missed you

Reiner Braun x reader

Requested by anon “Are you asking for Reiner's request? I have one! How about a NSFW and hurt/comfort drabble about S4 Reiner x female reader where he’s depressed and thinks like he’s undeserving of any sort of kindness or affection but reader comforts him? Reader was Reiner's former partner in the scouts and one of his best friends before he reveals himself as a titan shifter. She no longer hates him. Reiner being a sub. If you don't want to do it NSFW, just do it fluff. Fluff is fine too! Add some angst. Thanks!”

A/N- sorry if this wasn’t the smut you, but since what they talk about is serious, I wanted to keep it serious

Warning- Angst, slight sexual intentions but nothing to grande, talk of death and low

———-

“Come on,” you whisper as you take Reiners hand and pull him with you deeper into the woods.

“I guess old habits don’t die. You still like sneaking around, huh?”

You smirk and look at him over your shoulder, “I do remember you would follow me...like now.” You return your eyes to your designated path ahead and you make sure not to get seen by the soldiers keeping watch from the trees above. “Plus it’s okay to—”

“Have a little fun.” Reiner finishes for you. “Yeah you would say that too,” he finishes with a soft chuckle.

You express a lighthearted scoff and quietly continue manuerving to the place you had intended taking him, making it to the last obstacle in your way and having to push away some branches, and going through some tall bushes to finally make it to the cliff that overlooked a big beautiful lake that reflected the moon in the sky.

You pull your hand from Reiners grip and walk to the edge, crouching down to pick up a small stone and throwing it as far as you could over the cliff. “I really do wish we were by the ocean,” you groan as you sit down on the edge and admire the view nonetheless. “The world is so big and we were blind and naive before, hidden from it all.” You slide your eyes to the side to see Reiner sit at your side, looking at you instead of looking out at the glimmering lake. “And let’s not talk about the food,” you muse with a happy smile on your lips. “It’s all so good, I could cry right now.” You fall back to rest your head on his shoulder. “You truly were hiding all of it.”

“I…” he begins to stammer, losing that happy spark in his eyes.

“Reiner, I was just teasing.” You chuckle while you pull away and turn slightly to be able to face him, moving your hand to cup his cheek and let your eyes wonder his face as your smile widened. “Don't worry about it.”

Even before, when you had seen him for the first time after four years, you instantly took notice that he had grown taller, that he had let his beard grow on his face, that he had lost weight and his cheeks were now slightly more hallowed in; you noticed that he was also more handsome. The only thing that was the same, was his pretty gold eyes.

“Reiner,” you finally mutter with a smirk, “you know, I really like your beard, I think it suits you very well.” You begin to gently caress his cheek and notice the smile slowly tugging on his lips.

“You think so?” He asks almost unsurely.

“Mhmm,” you lean closer and see him swallow thickly, see as his eyes like yours drift down to each other’s lips. You don’t hesitate to close the gap slowly, pressing a gentle kiss on his lips, and then moving to press a kiss on his cheek to then whisper by his ear. “You know, I missed you.” You move and swing your legs over either side of his lap and slide your hands over his biceps and slide them to his shoulders to then wrap them around his neck. “So much.”

Reiner carefully places his hands on your hips and he presses a kiss on your jaw.

“After all this time?” He queried, “even after all I did?”

You move to meet his gaze and you sigh out slowly, “I’ve had four years to be mad at you, I wanted to hate you, but I couldn’t. Reiner…” you pause and offer him a soft smile, seeing his eyes gleam and reflect the moonlight behind you and your face as you stay before him. “I love you, and I have since before you left.”

Reiner smiles and he lifts his hands to cup your cheeks, leaning in and pulling you in for a deep, yet short kiss that he began to slowly pull away from to then whisper his own comment by your lips, glancing repeatedly from your lips and to your eyes. “Im...in love with you too.”

A grin slowly spreads on your lips and you once again close the small gap left between you too to kiss him, sliding your hands to the back of his head to knot your fingers in his hair, feeling how soft it felt in between your fingers. Reiner proceeds to slowly skim his fingers down your body, creating chills all over your body yet not making you falter. Instead you proceeded to part his lips as you slide your tongue over his bottom lip, the sensation of your tongue over his lip making him shiver and causing him to express a soft moan in the back of his throat.

You smirk and pull away to start leaving warm and wet kisses on his jaw and down to his neck, you pause and let your lips brush over a part of his skin, pressing small kisses on that piece of skin and beginning to whisper what you had already told him, but what you couldn’t hold back. “I missed you. I missed talking to you and I missed kissing you.”

Reiner lets out a shaky breath and his fingers dig into your hips, he keeps quiet and let’s you continue kissing his skin, let’s you take the piece of his skin in between your teeth to gently suck on it and make him express another moan.

You slide your hands down to the button of his shirt to rip his shirt apart, pulling your head away and meeting his gaze to offer him a sweet mile, but before you could remove his shirt his hand cupped your cheeks and he tilted your head so your eyes met his once again. A smile decorates his features, but it slowly falls and made your breathing calm and your own smile falter.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t do this.”

You pull away from his hold and your lips drop to form a frown. “What...what are you talking about?”

Reiner raises his hands and tries to again get a hold of your face so you’d listen, but they just hovered over your cheeks as he shook his head and began to explain himself in a shaky voice. “I don’t deserve this, I don’t deserve you, or the kindness and love you give me.” He inhaled deeply and shakily exhaled, showing tears well in his eyes whilst he pulled back and got on his knees instead. “I don’t deserve to live after what I did, I-I’m a despicable human being.”

“Reiner,” you interject softly, dropping the anger that had begun to boil and replacing it with deep concern. “Reiner don’t say that—”

“But it’s true,” he raises his voice as more tears stream down his face and he falls on his hands and knees. “I don’t deserve your forgiveness, not after the pain I caused you. Not after the pain I caused our comrades.” He cries out, digging his fingers into the ground while his body trembled. “I love you, but I can’t let you love me. I can’t do this, just kill me!”

You hesitate for a moment, remain speechless and with your head full of racing thoughts; tears sting your eyes and you can’t find what to do or say to him to comfort him. All you could piece together was the whisper of his name, “Reiner…”

Reiner sobbed to the ground and made your own tears roll down the curve of your cheeks, you didn’t agree with anything he said, it upset you deeply that he would say that about himself. Actually the way he expressed himself left you in disbelief.

What you start to do is crawl closer to him, placing a hand on the back of his head and tilting your head down to try and see his face and eyes. But failing to do so as he kept his head down.

“Reiner,” you whisper, “please look at me.”

Said man doesn’t listen and keeps himself down and cries more softly than before.

“Look at me.” You say in a more strict tone, slowly earning what you demanded and seeing his gold eyes look up at you. “Yes, what you may have done was bad, but I know why you did it, I know why you left, I knew why you did everything past that. It’s not because you’re a bad person, it’s because you were just doing what you thought was right, we were both raised differently, and after spending time undercover where you were raised I understand why you did it, I would’ve done it too. You don’t deserve to die, and you do deserve all the love in the world.” You cup his cheeks and offer him a gentle and assuring smile. “Don’t blame yourself, all that matters is that you’re doing what’s right now.”

Reiner gets on his knees and you proceed to wipe the tears off his cheeks to continue. “You’re a good man, I see the way you’re with your cousin and I notice the way she admires you. You go out of your way to help and protect people, you’re trying to save humanity and I admire that. You have to live to see the peace your efforts will cause.” You laugh softly and press your forehead against his, “you’re important Reiner. Not only to me, but to your cousin, that little boy that came with her, the rest of your family and to humanity.”

Reiner cups your hands and you notice that he calms down, his breathing is shaky and his eyes are still glossy, but he isn’t crying anymore. His lips are formed into a sad frown, but you notice relief in his eyes.

“I love you,” you whisper, “and I always have and I always will.”

A soft and small smile tugs on his lips and he gently squeezes your hands. “Thank you. I love you.” He whispers. “Thank you.”

You pull away and move to sit beside him, interlacing your hand with his and resting your head on his shoulder. “Why don’t we stay here for another little while before we go back, yeah?”

“Sounds good.” He assures you.

[novamirmirsblog]

Romeo, Romeo wherefore art thou Romeo

YOU GUYS JUST SEND IN SUCH CUTE PROMPTS AND IT STOPS ME FROM WRITING ANGST BECAUSE THEY'RE SO DAMN LOVELY.

Enjoy! @avengers-wholesome Hopefully this is what you wanted! Also this was super fun to write so thank you so much for the request :3

Tag list: @d14n4ol

request: yes

Genre: Fluff 🙄 (Kidding - NATASHA DESERVES HAPPINESS)

word count: 707

Warnings: None

'Well in the spirit of graduation season this is the prompt: Peter (for extra credit) had to take theatre and is the understudy for Romeo in Romeo and Juliet. While at the Avengers Tower, he’s having a hard time memorizing the lines, and reader and Natasha and Tony witness it. So reader demonstrates how the balcony scene is done and tells Natasha to read the Juliet lines, while reader acts Romeo’s lines. The whole scene they become enamored and a spark is lit between them. Fast forward, The Avengers go to Peter’s high school graduation and are being that kind of family that is loud as hell when their kid gets called, especially Tony. Natasha and reader cheer and reader shouts “THATS OUR NEPHEW!” And as Natasha smiles, reader says “Hey, let’s face it: Tony is one second away from adopting him and Tony is like a brother to me, so that makes me his aunt. And because your my girlfriend, makes YOU his aunt!” (IM SO SORRY THIS GOT LONG!)'

YES. I mean let’s face it, Peter would totally do extra credit work. I feel like he would be the kind of student who’s super smart but because he’s all over the place, he never actually does very well.

- Peter often used the avengers as his own personal google. Tony would help with product design, Bruce would help with science, Natasha and Wanda with foreign languages and F.R.I.D.A.Y. with just about anything else

- You, however had a secret talent. Your parents had made you go to acting school when you were very young. There were only two people outside your parents who knew of your talent - Nat and Tony.

- Nat knew because, well, she's a spy and quote unquote 'it was vital she knew everything about you because you might have been a HYDRA spy.'

- Tony knew because he was the one who recruited you into the Avenger family once he saw one of your fight scenes when you were a part time stunt double.

- So when the two see Peter struggling with learning his lines for his extra credit work, their minds automatically go to you.

- 'Heyy Y/nnnnn"

- "What do you want Tony?"

- "Can't I just want to talk to you?"

- "No."

- "Y/n?"

-"Hey Natasha..."

- "Wait why does Natasha get a hey and I get a what?"

- "Because I like her more than you. She doesn't only come to me when she needs a favour."

- Natasha let Tony try to convince you to help Peter with his lines just for her own enjoyment. She then stepped in and you agreed.

- "Natasha come here, you can read Juliet's lines."

- You looked cute, your hair a little messy from trying to explain to Peter many times that it doesn't really matter if he understands what they're saying or not, he just has to read it.

- It's why Natasha took a little longer to reach you than it normally would have done, she was too busy watching you rather than actually listening.

- You start the scene "Wilt thou be gone? it is not yet near day..."

- "It was the lark, the herald of the morn, No nightingale: look, love, what envious streaks..."

- You both get wayyy more into it than you should have. Luckily, Peter just thought it was really good acting.

- Luckily there was no kissing in the scene. It would have been too much for either of you to deal with. Also kissing in front of Peter just felt... wrong...

- Something was started when the two of you performed that scene.

- Even though Natasha is a total top, you were the one who asked her out. You had a feeling that if you didn't do it then there would be much more pining than there should be. Life is too short to live pining after someone.

- Your first date out as an official couple was actually to Peter's play.

-Well technically it was drinks that were after the dinner that was after the play.

- He did amazingly (as you knew he would - he had put so much effort into learning his lines)

- You did have a backup plan in case he didn't learn his lines in time though.

- Plan B was Wanda using her mind powers to send Peter the lines.

- "Y/n, I can here you thinking"

- "WANDA GET OUT OF MY HEAD" (You respectfully whisper shouted this and Wanda whisper shouted back)

- "ONLY WHEN YOU ADMIT THAT MY POWERS DON'T WORK LIKE THAT."

- You loved Wanda but her powers were confusing and you could only focus on things for short bursts of time.

- Act 5, scene 3 had just ended and you guys were definitely cheering the loudest.

- Thor was literally asked by security to leave.

- "THAT'S OUR NEPHEW!" You screamed in Natasha's face as you jumped up and down.

- She smiled - not smirked - but really smiled, you had made her soft.

- “Hey, let’s face it: Tony is one second away from adopting him and Tony is like a brother to me, so that makes me his aunt. And because your my girlfriend, makes YOU his aunt!”

- Peter bounds over to the two of you and wraps you both in a bone-crushing hug.

- Natasha looks at you over Peter's head "Yeah, we're his aunts."

[volfoss]

How about josuke or hayato?

im doing both namely bc i have been thinking abt hayato a ton lately and josuke is my bestie idc! will be longish prob so under the cut, also obviously part 4 spoilers (up to the ending)

Josuke:

Headcanon A: realistic

I feel he gets any homework done on time but tends to space it out over the night instead of getting it done in one big chunk because he gets distracted or frustrated about it. He'll take a lot of breaks to call a friend, have dinner, or play a game or two!

Headcanon B: while it may not be realistic it is hilarious

I think his hair has a lot of the padding stuff that he has to use because he finds it a lot easier in the school mornings to just pop the foam contraption on and style his hair around that rather than doing it all by hand and in a slightly more meticulous manner.

Headcanon C: heart-crushing and awful, but fun to inflict on friends

I feel that Okuyasu's near death really hit a lot worse due to what happened to his grandfather just a few months prior and Shigechi's death a monthish prior. I feel Josuke simply doesn't have the time to deal with the losses and is quite honestly just numb about it. When I say he doesn't necessarily have the time, it's more of he keeps himself so busy so that he never really has the time to weigh on what happens.

Headcanon D: unrealistic, but I will disregard canon about it because I reject canon reality and substitute my own.

Has a stick and poke tattoo that he keeps hidden under his shirt! It's matching with the rest of his friends and is a small diamond shape! Tomoko does NOT know about this

Hayato:

Headcanon A: realistic

He's the kind of kid to take every single burden on himself. I feel it's partially to blame with how Kosaku (not referring to Kira here) seemed to be a distant parent/husband to Shinobu and focused infinitely more on work than his family. I feel he very much withdrew a lot as a kid due to this environment and was someone who tended to play quietly alone in his room despite Shinobu being home.

Headcanon B: while it may not be realistic it is hilarious

(Hayato pokemon fan is real as fuck to me idc, prefacing it with this) But I think if for whatever reason he decided to not pursue killing Kira/stopping him, I think there is a TON of comedic potential for him holding the truth about Kira over his head. So much would have to line up including them like just barely tolerating each other, but I think Hayato needs to blackmail him into watching pokemon with him and having to learn every single pokemon. I think he literally deserves to have his bastard kid hours.

Headcanon C: heart-crushing and awful, but fun to inflict on friends

Idk how much of a headcanon this is, but Shinobu points out in ch 131 (on pg 7 on mangadex at least), he doesn't seem to have any close friends. I feel that's by choice quite honestly, he's not a particularly unfriendly person but seems to prefer being alone/in quiet environments. I feel like it kind of got moreso like this post canon, as seeing these people who are friendly to him and trying to help him die over and over probably made him feel more withdrawn. It does seem that he puts forth a tiny bit more effort (externally) towards Shinobu but I do genuinely feel it would make having friends a lot harder due to that trauma and how his trust was broken so badly with Kira replacing his dad.

Headcanon D: unrealistic, but I will disregard canon about it because I reject canon reality and substitute my own.

Has tried to turn the bathroom into a dark room to develop film once (it did not go well)

[satorugojowidow]

Jujutsu Kaisen ep 149 spoilers, analysis and maybe theories about what Gege is doing

In my opinion it wasn't a romantic kiss, was a CPR. She was unconscious and the kiss came after Mao hited her chest. Is a CPR move to me.

About incest in Jujutsu Kaisen

First i will like bring this post wich im agree with it. Write about incest or abuse is not wrong. What is wrong is romanticize. In my perspective incest is not romanticize in JJK.

Mei and Ui: Mei character is built as someone who has no values or etic at the point where she doesnt even understand it. She even says to Satoru that she does not understand any issue not related to money. She is also potrayed like someone who only cares for herself and we saw that when she ask Ui to sacrifice for her and quickly left Japan in Shibuya incident leaving everyone behind and taking only the money with her (and Ui who is more like a tool to her). It is clear that she has an abusive relationship with his brother. Ui is potrayed like someone who is absolute caught in Mei web. I think there is an effort to show this relantionship like something twisted, abusive and sick. So its clear to me that there is no intention from Gege to romanticize it.

Maki and Mai: first i have to say that kiss looked more like a CPR than a romantic kiss. But i going for the way where this kiss is a romantic kiss to express my point. If there is a romantic feeling between this two (wich i believe not), we have to understand it in the context of their shitty family. There is high chances that cousin x cousin marriage is happening inside the clan. This interfamily marriage are common in clans, dynasty, etc., to protect to blood line and all that shit. Main clans in Jujutsu society are very interested in keep their inherited technique so nobody would be surprised that they practice this type of incestuos marriage. The fact that they look alike so much in Zenin clan could point to this. So Maki and Mai grow up in a context where incest happen. Also the amount of physical and mental abuse in them and the fact that they only have each other to gain support could make this incest feeling possible. As they didn't grow up in a healthy environment and didn't have anyone to teach them about healthy feelings or even love in any form (their mother is totally caught in patriarchy). Again, there is an effort to show that all the problems that Toji, Maki and Mai have are because their shitty family. If incest is happening here is becaue this two girls never learned how to love in a healty way and they are confussed about their feelings. If May really kissed Maki is more like she doesnt know how to express herself because she grow up in abuse and there is no single healthy relationship in her family to look up.

Conclusion: incest is not romanticize in JJK. Maybe need to be portrayed more like a "trouble", maybe. But i think is enough portrayed like a trouble.

Mai's death: I know everyone is hurted because her death. But, lets be honest. We could see that comming. I predicted in my JJK Oracle serie but is not like im super smart or anything, is something we could see comming from how JJK story is build and the meaning of pass deaths in the manga.

"Mai deserve better": of course she did. But I dont think this story is about give what people deserve, is not about make justice for them. Real life and real world is extremly unfair. A story with any kind verisimilitude would potray unjustice.

"Gege is killing all his characters": In the same line of verisimilitude if some big events happen like shibuya incident we can not expect that everyone comeback alive. If all characters always comeback is more like a plot armor.

"Pointless dead" "Mai's arc wasted": All dead in JJK until now have a meaning and Mai's arc was this one from the start. Let try to figure out this.

In the story Maki is the main character, Mai (sorry to say) was auxiliary to her story. Mai is presented to develoment Maki story. To go deep in the patriarchal structures of Jujutsu world and to present the shitty dinamic of the Zenin clan from inside. Mai personal develoment was to understand that Maki actions wasnt the problem, but her all family itself. When the break point comes (Ougi desition to kill both) she realize that live peacefull in the clan dont depends on her obedience, it dependence in what the clan need from her from a moment to other. That there is no way to live peacefully in such an environment. That is when she can finally understand her sister action, reconcile with it and her, and support her sister road. Sadly she can only support with her death. But she doesnt die like subordinate person (like she was in pass episode or like her mother is) she die free, she is not simply killed, she gives her life in order to save her sister and destroy the clan. She emancipates at the end. Of course is sad that she has to die, but again, life is unfair and this story is not about make justice.

In jujutsu kaisen "death" works to build the living characters that go trought that lost.

Suguru -> Satoru

Junpei and Nanami -> Yuuji

Also, it establishes the situation where the characters are. Like Yaga's death wich leave the students in their own.

"Kill another female strong character": Well, i go for this one. There is no much female strong characters so Gege do something for gender equality and stop killing them.

-------------------

In my opinion, and this is in some way a theory, what Gege is trying to do is reverse the typical shonen story.

He brought the typical elements from a shonen: a regular boy who discover that he is not so regular, lots of fights, power up, and even some kind of tournament (just to name a few one).

But at the same time Gege is slowly deconstructing the elements of shonen genre:

The hero is the strongest character and save everyones. We have Satoru is the strongest character and he fails to save people at the point when he realize that "save" dont depends on him. That is why he goes for the teaching/supporting role. Help others to save themselves. However situations keeps going in a way where he losses his closes people and he cant do anything to stop that.

So we can say this: in JJK heros cant save others.

In regular shonen the social structures are never questioned. In JJK we can see how those structures are the villain. We have the conservative structures of jujutsu society wich higher up keep against everything because their privilege depends on it. And the patriarcal structures. Even if JJK is stil away from being "feminist" is one step in the right direction from most regular shonen. Specially those shonen where the main female character is there just to be cute and she cant even speak her mind

We all feel like fell in some kind of trap in JJK. Because in firsts episodes we were like "oh, how cute and fun. look there is a speaking panda" and then we fell in angst. I think this is part of how Gege builds the story to reverse the genre.

Dont expect a happy ending, expect a end with meaning. Dont expect to see your fav getting what they deserve, expect to understand why they went through that.

And remember one thing: Yuuji death is not in discussion in the plot, what is in discussion is how he is going to live what he has left of live.

[asian-hero]

The Words I Can Finally Say To You In Confidence

A/N: Remember when I wrote “The Words I Desperately Want To Say” and “[Im]perfectly You?” Well, here’s the aftermath of those two fics :) 

The third (and perhaps final) part of this impromptu series 

also ahaHA I’M BACK :,)

Summary: After a long road of learning to love himself, Todoroki Shouto is finally in a place where he feels comfortable with himself, flaws and all. So, what better way to celebrate this newfound self love than to finally tell you what he’s been trying to so desperately for the past few years?

Words: 1,612

Todoroki Shouto never once considered himself to be worthy of love.

Though, no one could really blame him. After all, his family, already cracked beyond repair with tension, was completely demolished by his birth. His father, so distracted by wanting to create the “prefect” vessel for him to beat All Might with, pushed him further from both his family and beyond his body’s limits. His mother, driven to the edge by his father, left him with a permanent reminder that he’d always be remembered as a monster in her eyes. His eldest brother, Touya, grew to despise him and wanted him dead. Fuyumi and Natsuo, while they never said anything, were awkward around him, not quite knowing what to do with themselves, with the knowledge of what he did to their family. Throughout the majority of his life, he’d never been showed the love that he so desperately craved.

It wasn’t until high school that he finally began to see himself as more than a home wrecker, as more than a monster. His friends made sure to remind him that he was his own person, someone who could be worthy of the praise he received, worthy of friendship. Yet despite these newfound bonds, he still never felt that he was someone who deserved love. A part of him still held onto the belief that he would ruin everything eventually, as he always did.

But, when you forced yourself into his life, determined to show him all of the wonderful things about himself, he couldn’t help but give into you. 

Even when he couldn’t see anything worthy of your love inside himself, you made an effort to remind him that he was your favorite person on the planet. Whenever he was beating himself up, it was you who would come to his aid, a kind smile on your face as you quietly listed off all of the things you loved about him, all the way from his mismatched, slightly singed hair, to his calloused hands, hard from all of the work and dedication he put into his job. Soft kisses were shared throughout the day, right from when he woke up, all the way up until the two of you were settled in bed, getting ready for the next day. Every kiss would be accompanied with a sweet declaration of love, one that you never forced him to reciprocate. 

For some reason, he could never get the words out, the shape of them so foreign. Though it wasn’t for a lack of trying, as there had been a multitude of times where he wanted to scream to the world about how much he loved you, about how you made him feel like he finally deserved what he so desperately craved. He wanted to tell everyone he knew about how you made him feel like he was an actual person, with feelings and all, rather than the monster he’d grown up thinking he was. However, whenever the words were on the tip of his tongue, he’d shut his mouth tightly, the words dying in his throat. 

When the night came and all of his emotions were put on display for you to see, rather than admonishing him for what he saw as a stupid flaw, you held him close, whispering to him just how much you loved and cared for him. You made him feel safe. Even when he still didn’t tell you those three little words, you never made him feel bad about it. Rather, you made sure to say it enough for the both of you, in hopes to remind him that he was truly worthy of everything good in the world. 

Even when he had a breakdown about his own self-image, of how he viewed himself, you never made fun of him. Rather than look at him incredulously, telling him that his self-esteem issues were ridiculous, you instead told him you’d remind him everyday just how beautiful you thought he was. 

To him, you were the epitome of warmth. Though it took a lot of effort on your part, you helped him see himself the way you saw him. While he knew there would never be a moment where he fully loved himself, you helped him at least learn to care for himself. He may not love himself, but he certainly liked the person he was becoming. 

So, after years of learning how to like himself, when the opportunity arose, he couldn’t stop the words he’d been aching to say from rushing out of him.

The two of you were relaxing on the couch, with your legs propped up onto his lap while you lazily scrolled through your phone. Shouto, as usual, was simply admiring you, enjoying the way your nose scrunched up whenever you found something funny, or when you’d lean over to show him a cute cat video you thought he’d like. As he continued to watch you, he couldn’t stop the warm feeling from bubbling up his chest, a pleasant wash of happiness bathing him. 

If he were to ascribe a word to you, he’d call you home. The feeling of when you come back from a long day at work, the cold of the evening biting at your figure, suddenly being immersed in the comforting warmth of your home. Seeing you felt as though Shouto were being wrapped into a woolen blanket, enjoying the peaceful air surrounding him. He’d been told before, by his mother, that home wasn’t always a place, but sometimes it was a person who made you feel comfortable enough to be yourself. Years of mistreatment and abuse had made him skeptical of that notion, as he could never see himself ever taking solace in a person. However, as soon as he’d met you, and you’d somehow wormed your way into his heart, he knew exactly what his mother was talking about. 

As Shouto continued to stare at you, seemingly lost in his own thoughts, you rose an eyebrow, setting your phone down. Smiling, you tapped his thigh with your foot, a giggle leaving your lips as he was startled back into reality.

“Something you want to share with the class, love bug?” You asked, enjoying the way his face crinkled at the new nickname, “Admiring my beauty?”

When he didn’t respond, your smile faded. Sitting up straighter, you looked at him, a bit of concern flickering in your eyes. “Sho, is everything—“

“I love you.”

The words were quiet, and they were so rushed that it almost sounded as if he were speaking another language. But you heard it.

You blinked once. Then twice. Finally, you felt your eyes widen, your body trying to cope with what you just heard. Taking in a shaky breath, you frowned.

“Shouto, you don’t have to—“

“I know I don’t have to,” He said, his own face telling you that he didn’t expect the words to come out, “But I want to. You deserve to hear it, (Y/N),”

You looked down at your hands, nervously wringing them together as you fought a smile off of your face. Shyly, you peeked up at him, heat rushing to your face, “Well, if that’s the case, could you say it again?”

Pulling you by your legs, he tugged you onto his lap, eyes slightly watery and a warm smile on his lips as he pressed a kiss to your jaw, “I love you, I love you, I love you,”

You let out a laugh, a sound of pure elation. Capturing his lips with yours, you hoped that you could convey all of the emotions you were feeling at the moment. You felt his arms wrap themselves around your waist, squeezing you tight against him, as if you’d disappear if he’d let go. 

Pulling away, you brushed your hand against his cheek, feeling him nestle into your touch. When the dreamy look in his eyes returned, you giggled. “What brought this on?”

He shrugged his shoulders, his eyes brighter than they had ever been, “It’s been a long time coming, I just couldn’t say it before,”

“So,” He continued, turning his head to press a kiss to your palm, eliciting a quiet squeal from you, “Let me make up for all the times I couldn’t say ‘I love you,’ even though it’s the only thought that runs through my mind when I think of you,”

He continued to press soft kisses to you, starting with your forehead, moving to your eyelids, to your nose, your cheeks, and finally, to your lips. Every step of the way, he’d whisper quiet confessions of love for you, each one making your heart flutter. Though you told him that you didn’t mind, that you knew he loved you, it seemed as though he was on a mission to make sure that you felt loved, this time verbally. Once his kisses began to tickle, you laughed as you pulled away once more, bumping noses before staring into his eyes. What you weren’t expecting was for a tear to have slipped from his eyes. 

Wiping the tear away with your thumb, you frowned, “What’s with the tears?”

Letting out a light sigh, the kind that made you feel ten times lighter, Shouto shook his head, his hands now squeezing at your thighs, “It’s nothing, just—“

He cut himself off, pressing another kiss to your lips. This time, rather than the soft, playful ones you’d be receiving, it was tender, and made you feel as though you were on cloud nine.

“Thank you for loving me, even when I couldn’t. I’ll spend the rest of my days telling you just how much I love you.”

[straighttohellbuddy]

📓 !!

Okay im so excited please know I think about How The Light Gets In's world every day still, and so anyways here is a side story I want to write but there's a lot of set up regarding the reader and eef becoming friends again. For context, they were incredibly close around 2014-2017, but people were getting creepy and invasive and demanding about their friendship (think 2012 toxic side of the Phandom, if that makes sense), and a lot of the reader's relationships were strained at that time because while they had been successful before, they were absolutely blowing up after their first album released and they became far more mainstream. They felt like they were bothering the people they had become closest to, both because they're worried that they're a bother, and because gossip rags and paps would harrass their friends looking for a scoop, and so they ended up just completely cutting off contact without warning one day right before they went on their first tour. the start of HTLGI is about 3 years since they'd been in proper contact with any of the creators they were close to at that time.

DON'T LOOK AT ME on their 2017 ep Hyperfocus was a more general song in response to everything that had been happening in their life around that time, with a focus on how they stop associating with anyone for a while, without outright addressing it, but on their latest album n o s t a l g i a, read at 5am ft. Troye was specifically written at the start of quarantine, when the reader was getting back into YouTube, about their feelings regarding how their friendship with ethan ended, as they spent a lot of this time looking back of their YouTube career, and he was the person they were closest to for a very long time, before they iced everyone out.

OKAY SO THERES MORE OF THE BACKGROUND OF THE WHOLE FIC AND THE READER BUT

Werewolf Ethan & Mark. I'm sorry I don't make the rules. They have golden retriever energy you cannot change my mind. But also because this is the HTLGI you know that supernatural characteristics are able to be activated rather than just triggered by the full moon. What I'm trying to say is since this is set in the year of Unus Annus, they film a video together that's like, you know that show where a person has to try and outwit a professional tracker? Except its the reader being tracked by two werewolves at night in a national park. Reader is wearing some sort of night vision camera on themselves so whenever it cuts to them the audience can't actually see how they're using their powers, if that makes sense.

Also the reader agreed to this knowing it would probably be when they ended up telling Mark and Ethan about them being a demon.

Video is titled Hunting Down An Old Friend

A few Moments that the boys edit out:

The reader using their stupidly sharp prehensile tail to swing from tree branches, though they leave in shots where the reader's tail can't be seen.

Knowing that with the werewolves having advanced hearing, the reader would give themselves away by talking to the camera, they take a few minutes having flown up to a high tree branch, to pull out a notebook and do a little sketch of how Mark and Ethan appear in their Demon True Sight, and holding it up to their camera.

Werewolves being one of the animals who can kind of sense demons without being able to identify them, essentially like dogs can sense natural disasters and are often good judges of character, this can be heightened on command for werewolves. There's about 15 minutes of footage cut out of the boys discussing or mentioning how this place has awful vibes and that they should have done this during the day. It gets worse as they get closer to the reader, who didn't realise that the boys hadn't thought to ever use that particular power around them before.

("I say this with so much love and appreciation for you, dude," Ethan yells, looking up at you from the base of the tree they'd finally found you in, "but I- this is making me anxious I feel like something terrible's gonna happen, and we should probably get out of here and film the rest of the video back at Mark's." And behind him, Mark's nodding, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, eyes scanning the trees for whatever was most likely the cause of this terrible impending doom.

Oh. It's you. And they don't know its you.

Now or never, you suppose.

"Can you cut the cameras for a second? You're going to be fine I promise," you called back, and though they obligingly did, they both seemed antsy. You cleared your throat awkwardly, "that... that terrible feeling, that's not the park or anything in it- well I mean, it is, but it's just- it's me."

and later

"Dude your wings smell like rotten eggs."

"To YOU Ethan! And no they don't!"

"If it makes you feel better they smell like burning and rotten eggs."

"It does not."

(for reference, when enhancing their sense of smell werewolves can kind of distinguish various supernatural creatures, or parts of supernatural creatures. Some creatures have an inherent scent, but some, like angels and demons, only have distinct scents when they've activated certain attributesor abilities; demon wings smell like fire and brimstone, which unfortunately means burning and rotten eggs. I like to think angels wings are like the love potion in Harry Potter that smells like the things you love the most. Mark and Ethan usually don't enhance it around each other because they smell like wet dog to the other)

This gets about 2k notes on tumblr. The reader likes it:

Ethan finally finding Y/N at the end of Hunting Down An Old Friend (2020) Colourised.

Other things to note regarding all this:

It takes a while to rebuild their friendship to the point where they're comfortable enough to be on camera together (eef and reader specifically).

However, the Unus Annus video is the first thing they properly do together, and the reader, in an effort to connect more and make up for the past, will join in multiplayer gaming streams if asked.

Impromptu duet in proximity Among Us of Young Volcanoes by Fall Out Boy, which has their respective chats and fandoms losing their minds, except it stops abruptly after the first chorus as they both remember the opening lines of the second verse (make it easy, say I never mattered -- those lyrics hit a little too close to home)

But also the reader convinces him to join him for a proper cover in like, February of 2021, and it's something deeply sappy (I'm thinking Bon Iver by mxmtoon because I think its sweet and fits them well)

Also Ethan being reminded that the reader is kind of a much bigger deal than when they'd been friends before.

designed to hurt (touch me) from their ep Working On It is nominated for a Grammy for Track of the Year, and n o s t a l g i a wins Best Pop Album (because it's my fic and I said so)

FIRST OF ALL designed to hurt (touch me) is a beautifully produced song about Corpse (which people do not know) and the title itself is literally making fun of something he said IMAGINE his reaction to it being Grammy Nominated 😂😂😂 God he'd be proud but lowkey fuming, meanwhile the moment the nominations are announced the reader tweets:

me: here is an album where I processed my entire world view including heartfelt explorations of the trauma of existing and oversharing in the public eye from a young age without the traditional barrier between audience and entertainer

the grammys: that's cute BUT you know the song you wrote to bully your boyfriend and also be horny on main for him before you guys were even dating? THAT deserves its own recognition.

meanwhile Ethan's like..... this is the same person who I filmed a video with playing cards against humanity, and you laughed so hard you almost threw up. I am very proud but deeply confused.

The Hot Meme of Late April 2021 is "2 time Grammy Award Winning Artist Y/N" with a gif, still, or quote from the reader where they're just being an absolute chaos gremlin.

Of course we have "If I bleached my asshole for charity I'd do it tastefully."

2 Time Grammy Award Winning Artist Y/N speaking to their actual boyfriend in the year of our lord 2020: You are being executed for Clown Crimes.

ethan posts a short video to twitter simply of his screen where he's renaming a folder from "Never Before Seen Images of Grammy Award Winning Artist Y/N" simply changing it to 2 time Artist. The reader responds specifically to his tweet with a video of themselves asking Google how to hard reset someone else's computer.

So many screenshots from old videos surface that week.

I miss this world. Sorry this is rambly!!

[kaaytea]

Im the anon who requested the Koushuu x manager/Kazuya's sister reader

Since im still completely in love with the dinner headcanons, I was wondering since it its Koushuu's bday, if i could make another request?^^

About how manager/kazuya's sister would surprise him? Maybe she finally convinces Kazuya to let her spend some time with Kou in the dorm room and they have this really special, fluffy moment cause he deserves some love on his bday🥺🥺

I’m honestly surprised at how quickly I wrote this (see what happens when you guys inspire me😤) so hopefully it sounds consistent. As a fellow Koushuu lover I had sO much fun writing this. Technically bc Wolfy's birthday is in the winter, Miyuki wouldn't share a dorm with him anymore but for the sake of this oneshot let's pretend third years are allowed to stay on the team 🤭 I hope you like it anon! 💖

Reason

----------------------------------------------------------

"Please Nii-chan!"

Kazuya's face scrunched in displeasure as he twirled the bat in his hand.

"How many times do I have to say no?" He flatly stated. Kazuya kicked his foot against the crate you were sitting on, his way of trying to end the discussion and get you to continue tossing balls for him.

You let out a deep sigh before picking up another baseball, briefly letting your fingers brush over the worn stitching and scratched leather then lightly tossing it up where Kazuya cleanly hit the ball into the net. You sat there stewing in your thoughts as you continued to half-heartedly toss the balls up, putting in only just enough effort to get the ball up for your brother to hit. You didn't flinch at the sharp clang of the bat, once upon a time you might have, but at that moment you were too upset to even give it a second thought.

"Ok, but what if-"

"(Y/n)," Kazuya cut you off with a stern look, his tone was frighteningly reminiscent of the one your father used to scold you. The simple utter of your name immediately sent chills up your arms as you fought the urge to cower as you did when you were a child. "I said no, I'm not discussing this with you anymore."

You shot up from the crate, gripping the ball in your hand tightly as you glared up at your brother. You weren't going to let him play the older brother card -not this time! You would keep pushing for this until he broke down.

"But it's not fair! You hang out with your friends all the time! Why can't I?!"

"Because Dad told me to look after you, and that includes keeping you from mischievous boys"

Your face screwed up in a sour expression, "If you wanted to keep me from boys why in the world did you let me become a manager for a BOYS baseball team?"

Kazuya stared down at you, his mouth opening and closing as he tried to find the words to respond to you.

"That's.....that's actually a good question. Any chance you'd consider resigning?"

"NII-CHAN!"

The boy broke out into a fit of laughter leaning his weight onto the bat to keep himself upright as he gasped out phrases like: "your face!" and "You actually thought I was serious!"

You huffed at your brother’s childish behavior and slumped back onto the crate, leaning your head on your palm as you spun the baseball around In your other hand. You were completely frustrated with Kazuya, he was treating this like a joke, and somewhere deep in your heart you were a bit hurt by his lack of faith in, not only you but Okumura as well.

Kazuya's laughter started to die down as he straightened up and got back into his batting stance. Only this time you didn't toss him a ball to hit, he watched as you dejectedly dropped the ball in your hand back into the crate.

"Do you really not trust me?"

You heard him sigh through his nose, followed by the sound of another crate being dragged over so he could sit in front of you. He kicked your foot gently, an unspoken way of him telling you to look at him while he talked.

"Look, it's not that I don't trust you, you're very smart and have always been careful with who you make friends with," he offered you a small smile making you fight the urge to smile back, "It's more the fact that you asked to be alone in a dorm room with Okumura. That boy confuses the hell out of me, I never know what he's thinking so it's difficult for me to give you permission to leave you unsupervised with him."

You snorted at what he said. Your brother made Koushuu sound like a mysterious delinquent when in reality he was anything but.

"Nii-chan, Kou can't look me in the eyes longer than 5 minutes. You don't have to worry about him doing anything bad."

"Kou?!" He gasped out. The catcher brought a hand to his forehead dramatically, "You're on a first-name basis with him already! What do I do?! You're being corrupted!"

You groaned, rubbing the heels of your hands into your eyes trying to distract yourself from the unavoidable headache that would surely appear in the next few minutes.

Kazuya stood up from the crate and pushed it to the side with his foot.

"Two hours"

"What?"

"I'm giving you two hours with him -but that's it!"

A grin spread across your face and you jumped up trapping Kazuya in a tight hug. One of his hands ruffled your hair as you babbled out thank yous.

"Yeah, yeah whatever. Now get off, I wanna get through the rest of this crate, and then I'll walk you back to your dorm."

--------------------------------------------------

The day was finally here! Your brother had graciously granted you two whole hours to hang out with Kou in his dorm! Safe to say you were a little more than excited as your dorm mates teased you about seeming extra lively that morning. You simply brushed it off as having gotten a good night’s rest, but the heat radiating off your cheeks contradicted your efforts.

You checked the gift bag hanging loosely from your wrist for the thousandth time as you approached the familiar door. After confirming that his gift was still safely stowed away, you gently knocked and impatiently bounced on the balls of your feet while waiting to be let in.

It didn't take long for the door to swing open and reveal the familiar eyes that always shone with warmth, a juxtaposition to their icy color when you were around. It took you countless hours and silly conversations to melt Okumura's frosty exterior, leaving something reminiscent of a loyal pup.

"Hi," he softly said, already moving to the side to let you into the dorm. When the door closed you threw yourself at Okumura, wrapping your arms around the boy’s neck and pulling him into a hug. The action startled him slightly, his body stiffening up from surprise before he cautiously wrapped his arms around your waist.

"Happy birthday, Kou!" You chirped, beaming up at the blonde, whose cheeks were quickly tinting a soft pink.

"T-thanks," he sputtered as he untangled himself from you. Before Okumura could get a chance to process and compose himself you were already pushing his gift into his hands while chanting "open it open it!"

He sat down on the edge of his bed —with you doing the same, positively vibrating with excitement— and gently pulled out a little bundle of blue tissue paper neatly folded over the gift. Okumura carefully unwrapped the object revealing a new pair of batting gloves.

He turned the gloves over in his hands inspecting them. A mixture of white and deep blue detailing produced a very clean look to the gloves. The thicker material around palms and the very obvious brand name instantly made him realize you probably spent a good amount of money to get these.

"Do you like them?" He turned to look at how excited you seemed. The sparkle in your eyes made his heart flutter, but he couldn't shake the slight guilt that ate at him. "Takuma helped me a bit with finding a style similar to your old pair -but, I noticed you rub at your palms after batting so I got you gloves with extra padding around the base of your hands!"

Okumura was a bit surprised at how observant you were. It's true his old gloves, a pair he's had since his second year in junior high, had started to wear down. It always amazed him how you could pick up on small cues in the sport. Although to be fair, you were a Miyuki and had basically been trained by your older brother in everything baseball-related since you could walk.

"They're really nice," he slipped one of the gloves on, clenching his hand a few times to get a feel for them, "you didn't have to spend so much on me though."

You rolled your eyes and bumped your shoulder against his.

"I knew you'd say that...Think of it this way, these will probably last you the rest of your time at Seidou, so technically they were a valid investment on my part." You sent him a gentle smile which he returned before taking off the glove and moving to put them in his practice bag.

While Okumura was occupied your attention was stolen by the laptop sitting open on his bed.

"You weren't doing school work, right? I'm not interrupting or anything?"

The boy looked back at you and shook his head, his blonde hair bounced slightly at the movement. He walked back over to the bed returning to his spot next to you. In one quick movement, he dragged the laptop over to the both of you and unplugged the headphones he had in. Immediately your senses were filled with the voices of announcers and the crack! of a wooden bat.

"The Hanshin Tigers?," You looked up at him where he confirmed your guess with a short nod, his eyes not leaving the screen as he watched the team’s left fielder catch a pop-up, "I didn't know you were a fan."

"I wouldn't really consider myself one," he softly said, "Taku made me watch all their games with him when we were kids, and the habit sort of stuck."

You smiled at the thought of a younger Koushuu being forced to watch games with his enthusiastic friend. You wished you were there at that time to see a younger version of your two friends, Takuma most definitely shaking Koushuu’s shoulders excitedly at any play that seemed remotely difficult. 

It was obvious that Okumura was still invested in the game, and you'd be lying if you said you weren't interested in seeing how it was gonna play out, so the both of you found yourselves sitting up in his bed.

You quickly lost track of time as you both watched the game, pointing out plays and betting on what would happen. Although, the longer you sat the more sore your arm was becoming. Okumura didn't have the largest build compared to other players on the team, but his shoulders were still significantly broader than your own. Because of that you had bent you right arm and shoulder in an awkward position to watched the game. You started to fidget around trying to find a more comfortable way to sit. Koushuu was about to offer to set the laptop up on a desk instead, but his thoughts were cut off when he let out an involuntary squeak as you picked up his left arm and draped it across your shoulders.

"Is this ok?"

He could only stiffly nod as he felt his heart rate pick up and heat spreading across his cheeks. The heat spread to the tips of his ears as he felt you snuggle closer into his side and rest your head on his chest.

As awkward as he felt in the moment, Okumura had to admit that having you tucked under his arm was a nice feeling. He enjoyed being able to connect with you, somewhere deep in his heart he hoped this moment was what would push the both of you to become a little more than just friends. Slowly Okumura relaxed into the feeling, pulling you closer into him and gingerly leaning his head on yours.

--------------------------------------------------

"Koushuu?" You questioned as you both watched the ending ceremony to the game being displayed. He responded with a hum, dropping his hand to play with the ends of your hair.

"Would you play professionally if you were given the chance?"

He sighed, twisting a lock of your hair around his finger as he pondered your question. He was quite familiar with this topic, his family had been asking him that very question for the past few years and he always had the same response.

"If I found a reason to."

He gazed down at you, watching your eyes shift around his face as you studied his expression.

"I've always just followed Kazuya from team to team, managing and learning so I wouldn't be left behind," your eyes flicked to his lips briefly before locking back on to his crystalline hues, "But he leaves in a few months....I've been trying to find a new path to follow."

A greedy voice from the depths of Okumura's mind whispered 'me'. If he were to be honest he already found his reason to continue perusing baseball, and that reason was you.

In only a short time span you had somehow given a new meaning to the game, your passion and joy for the sport had spread into his heart and, as selfish as it sounded, he hoped that you'd join his side and face the sport together as partners once your time at Seidou came to an end.

Neither of you had noticed how you were slowly leaning closer and closer to each other, a magnetized energy pulling you together. With your noses just barely touching, you cupped his jaw and started to tilt your head up.

"YOUR TWO HOURS ARE UP (Y/N)! ITS TIME FOR YOU TO LEAVE NOW!~"

The magnetic feeling vanished the instant the door slammed open and Kazuya practically sang for you to leave. Luckily, Okumura had quick reflexes and was able to put a decent amount of space between the two of you the moment Kazuya's voice echoed around the room.

"I'll walk you back to your dorm," he said softly, avoiding looking at his captain as you both shuffled out the door.

The walk to your dorm was silent. There was nothing to say as you were both too embarrassed to mention what had almost happened.

Okumura was somehow even more aggravated by Miyuki, the both of you were so close to finally admitting and giving in to the chemistry that had been slowly and steadily building since summer break. All of that progress was ruined in a matter of seconds by the nuisance of a captain.

You stopped in front of your dorm door, quickly looking down both halls only to find the area vacant of any other girls.

"Koushuu," you tapped his shoulder making him turn his attention from the floor to you. Your arms wrapped around his neck and you reached up on your tiptoes, your lips a hairs width away from his.

"Happy Birthday," you whispered before pressing your lips together.

Okumura gently returned the kiss, his hands hovering near you —unsure of what to do with them— until you moved his right hand to cup your cheek. Instinctively he tilted your head up slightly.

You both pulled away with batted breath and burning faces. In those few seconds following, your actions caught up with you. Your body burned in embarrassment as you stuttered out a 'bye' and slipped into your dorm.

Koushuu's fingers drifted up to his mouth as he walked back to the baseball team's dorms, still slightly in shock at the situation.

Hopefully, that first kiss showed you your new path just as it had confirmed his.

[whitexwingedxdoves]

a love like war | part two

Pairing: Negan x Reader Pronouns: She/her Warnings: Language Summary: Sequel to The Other Side: It seems like Negan’s efforts to win you back are too hard to fight off. A/N: I had so much fun with this sequel <3 Again all the thanks goes to @jinxeee <3 Tags: @aubageddon91  @phoenixblack89 @chloe-skywalker​ @srhxpci @browneyes528​

Read part one here.​​

When you arrived back at Alexandria, Daryl wasn’t best pleased when he saw you with Negan. In fact that night he gave you a lecture on how you should have found a way to tell him. You could barely even think for yourself that night, all you could think about was what Negan had said to you but you realised quickly that it was a dangerous territory for you to be in. You had come to the conclusion that you wouldn’t put yourself in a situation like that again, you’d do your very best to stay clear of the ex leader.

Michonne had taken it upon herself to join Daryl in a hunt leaving you with babysitting duties, Judith had gone off to work on her homework and RJ seemed content playing in the street, you watched him dance around the street giggling at the story he had made up in his head from the kitchen window, it was the first time since the hoard that you felt at ease. You turned away for just a second to place down your empty glass and when you returned to the window, RJ was much further down the road crying. It looked like he had fallen over and hurt himself which only panicked you, you took off running out of the house and in his direction.

Before you made it to RJ’s side you noticed the very man you had been avoiding bent down by his side, making the child smile and forget about the scrap on his knee. You could feel all the muscles in your body tense as you slowed your pace, your heart was racing as you made your way to the boy’s side. You noticed Negan rubbing his hand over the graze that now occupied the child’s skin reminding him it was nothing and just a bump. He managed to calm RJ down completely as you bent over to check on him. “What happened buddy?” your voice was soft and calm as you reached your arms out to the boy, instantly he clung onto you in the form of a hug.

“Little fella just had a fall” Negan now spoke, nudging RJ gently before sending him a wink “but you’re alright now, aren’t ya?” RJ seemingly turned shy and nodded at the question.

Your head only seemed to grow foggier as you watched the way Negan interacted with the toddler, your heart seemed to swell at the sight “Thank you” you whispered to the tall man as you both rose to your feet. He shrugged off your appreciation as if his actions didn’t require a thanks.  “You know its cheating when you use the kids too get me to forgive you” though you passed it as a joke, you felt it fully, you couldn’t believe a simple act of kindness towards a child would almost make you forget the torture you endured at the hands of the man. Negan simply laughed at your words allowing his tongue to guide his bottom lip between his teeth. You looked down at RJ letting him back down on his feet now that he seemed confident enough to brave walking again. “Thank you, again” your eyes now met with Negan’s again and he sent you a sincere smile. You’re not sure why but you stood on the tips of your toes and gave him a small kiss on his cheek and turned away from him following RJ back down the street. You instantly regretted your actions, a moment of weakness on your behalf only confirmed Negan’s plans to win back your heart were slowly working.

You gave it a lot of thought and now that Daryl had gone to Hilltop to help out some more up there, you decided to give Negan the benefit of the doubt. You told Gabriel you were willing to take your share of shifts on ‘Negan watch’ though you weren’t fully ready to forgive him for what he had done, he had proven his willingness to change and that seemed like enough to build some sort of friendship with him and start your healing process.

The shifts went well, not once did he ever say anything out of place or make you feel uncomfortable. He’d ask you about your day and offer you a joke about his, you got on fairly well for the first two days. You had mentioned to him that Judith was struggling with her math work and he offered to help with your supervision. You’d take her to the cell and let her ask him questions and laugh whenever she responded to him with nothing but pure sass. When she had finally had enough of her work, Judith took off leaving you alone with Negan.

You unlocked his cell door and asked him to hold out his hands so you could shackle him. “Thank you for that “ you giggled, taking his hands in yours and clasping the handcuffs on. You were taken back slightly when your skin touched his but you didn’t let it show.

“She sure has an attitude” he allowed a chuckle of his own pass as he looked down at you, your eyes slowly met with his and it caused instant tension. It confused you how he still had such a hold on your heart despite all the horrible things he put you through. You barely noticed his eyes flickering between your gaze and your lips. When he slowly lowered his head that when you pulled away, pushing on his chest a little to make him stand further back into his cell.

“What the fuck!” you shouted in his direction, your breathing seemed to become short as you tried to piece together what just happened.

“Im sorry, I thought-“ you cut him off instantly, the anger quickly bubbling to the surface.

“You thought what? You thought that just because you helped a kid with their math homework I’m gonna instantly forget what you did to me?” He hung his head in shame as you scolded him. “You can’t just pull that shit! It’s not fair! Every time I see you, there’s always some new attempt to get me to forgive you but it doesn’t matter, it doesn’t matter how much I love you, it’s never going to change the fact that you broke me. I can’t trust you” tears now streamed down your face like a constant flowing body of water.

“I’ll never stop” Negan shouted back at you, your face starting to crease as he spoke. “I won’t stop until I make it right, until I make it up to you. You’re the only thing that matters now.” His words managed to take away your ability to breathe. Your stomach felt as though there was a large pit that occupied it, shaking your head you turned away from him and ran out of the room, ignoring any stares you seemed to attract as you made your way down the street. You tried your best to mask the emotion that spilled from your eyes but the wet tracks on your face gave you away.

-

 You found yourself sitting in one of the newer buildings, people often gathered there for prayer and though your faith had been tested by the new world, you seemed drawn to it. You sat on one of the many chairs available and admired the woodwork of the beams that supported the room, you thought you were alone until you heard footsteps creeping up behind you. You turned to meet their maker and were met with the priest himself, you gave him a soft smile before turning your attention back to the beams. “I can’t remember the last time I saw you in here” Gabriel’s words were soft as he pulled up a seat next to you, you let a breathy laugh pass as you let your head hang a little “something on your mind?” what wasn’t on your mind, you looked over at the man sending him an obvious look.

“You could say that” you joked back pressing your lips into a thin line. “I’m not much of a believer but I think only a higher power can help me with the situation I find myself in”  you sighed to further prove the stress you felt. Gabriel let a small smile creep onto his lips before placing his hand on your shoulder and just like that you let everything out, you explained your situation with Negan and how confused you felt by his recent pass. You’re not sure how Gabriel made you feel safe enough to trust him with your honesty but he did and he did it well.

He allowed the information to settle for a moment before a sigh of his own passed his lips “anyone who is given the chance can change” you weren’t convinced of his words, you knew people could change but you also knew that once someone had crossed a line, there was no going back and you were sure Negan crossed the line long ago. “You and I both know that a second chance can go a long way, maybe Negan deserves one too but only you can decide that ” Gabriel left you to your own thoughts after that, he figured he helped as much as he could. You stayed in your seat for a while thinking over the new advice you had been given, tears seemed to cloud your eyesight as you grew closer to your conclusion. Eventually you allowed yourself to leave the building, even though you weren’t fully convinced of your decision you made your way in the direction of Negan’s cell.

Negan was laid on his bed, staring up at the concrete wall when you made your way back into the room. He instantly pulled himself from the bed and made his way to the bars, he opened his mouth to talk but you cut him off before he had chance “I thought about, about you” at first your words came out as whisper, you seemed shy as you kept yourself close to the door but the way he looked at you in that moment made you sure this was the right decision. “I’m not sure how it will work, I mean your in prison for crying out loud” you bit down on your lip as you allowed your eyes to meet finally “but I can’t deny it anymore, I’ve tried to fight it, to bury it so deep that it can’t resurface but it always does. I don’t know why after the shit you put me through but I do, I love you” you tried to disguise the crack in your voice but at that point it didn’t matter, your feelings were now stripped bare and you felt naked as you stood before him. “I’m willing to at least try put it behind me, give you a second chance but if you do as much as put a toe out of line in anyway, I’ll make sure they keep you locked in this cell until you die” You stood your ground and did your best to stay stern but the wobble of your chin gave away your nerves.

Negan didn’t say a word he just nodded waiting for you to finish your speech but he still didn’t have a word to say. The room fell silent after that, you watched the former leader with tears in your eyes, noting how desperate he looked as he waited by the door of his cell for you. You were slow with putting the key in the lock and once you heard the sound that signalled it had unlocked your eyes met with his again, slowly you pulled back the metal bars until even he couldn’t take it anymore. He pushed through the bars and his hands engulfed your face, your heart felt like it was on fire when he touched you, your eyes flickered slightly at the pure euphoria your skin felt against his. It wasn’t long until his lips were entangled with yours, the way he attacked your lips like there was nothing else he wanted more made you let out a soft moan. It was like music to his ears. You allowed your hands to find the back of his neck as he let his hands slowly fall down your body and wrap around you to bring you closer to him. As he slowly pulled away from you, your eyes started to well up again. You pressed your head against his chest your hands clutching onto the fabric of his shirt “please don’t break me again”

[luminisvii]

RATING! ALL! THE CHAR CLONES!

i love char and gundam loves him too so because i am BORED i'm gonna rate all characters that the wiki tells me qualifies as a char clone!

many of these men will be rated on aesthetics and their wiki blurb alone since i have not watched all gundams

i tried to include pics but it SAID i can only use ten. WHAT? how am i supposed to rate how sexy they are?

Char Aznable

the man. the myth. the legend. i love him so much. hes super fucking hot bc of how bad he is. like an absolute madlad he goes around destroying the zabis and giving amuro hell. hes so good that despite being on team evil he regularly tops popularity polls and is widely regarded as being super attractive. im asexual but i agree. char is supreme. he and his red mobile suits cannot be topped. 20/10

Quattro Bajeena

now, char might be evil, but this guy is totally a stand up dude who is definitely not char. and the hyaku shiki? top tier. also very sexy. maybe char should take a lesson or two from this lovely man. 18/10 could not possibly be char himself

Glemy Toto

i have not watched ZZ. this dude upholds the tradition of stupid ass names in gundam. he just kinda look like hes a good person, though, which would be nice, but i prefer the evil men here. 6/10 love the idiotic name

Afranche Char

apparently a literal char clone. don't give a fuck. 1/10

Carozzo Ronah/Iron Mask

this guy really takes the mask thing seriously. i have also not watched F91. i love the just robot lookin mask and the purple color scheme. 8/10

Anavel Gato

this guy is kind of a chump. i get the feeling i'm supposed to find gato very cool, but all i could see was a total loser pushover as long as it was in the name of zeon. although to be fair, he was basically one of the most enjoyable characters in the mess that is stardust memory. 7/10 too much of a zeon apologist

Chronicle Asher

i called gato a chump but this guy looks like a tool. hes got the mask! i know nothing about victory gundam but this guy looks like, okay. 5/10

Schwarz Bruder

im ignoring the other guy listed with him on the wiki bc Herr Bruder is in fact, awesome. he isn't on team evil like some others, but he doesn't need to be. hes a JESTER NINJA. what's not to love? somehow, despite me thinking i knew the twist that was coming, he was still full of surprises. you cannot possibly predict the actual twist here. he really teaches domon how to get shit done. 15/10 absolutely sublime take on the trope

Zechs Marquise

not only is he voiced by takehito koyasu, but he chars so hard he chars three times as fast! we LOVE his dedication to being a char clone. i will never forget how treize challenged him to a fair fight and he was just like nah lmao. you go you stinky man! 10/10 for char-ing hard

Lancerow Dawell and Jamil Neate

i am fascinated by after war X and i'll watch it one day. it seems like the wiki is confused about these two and is going with very surface level details for these two being char clones. however i'll rate them both higher bc i think mr. neate's sideburns and glasses are just top tier character design. 9/10

Harry Ord

10/10

Rau le Creuset

i think i saw him in the like three episodes of SEED i watched. he definitely looks the part. seems kinda lame though. 6/10

Athrun Zala

this kid is hilarious, and also the most likable character i met in SEED, and he even has a quattro phase as he goes by alex dino! we'll give him points for effort. 9/10 you tried

Neo Roanoke

definitely not mu la flaga. hes also voiced by takehito koyasu. his mask looks kinda dumb, but i think the long hair look upgrades my man mu. takehito koyasu makes everything sexier. 8/10 bc i also simp for dio brando

Rey Za Burrel

how many char clones does the SEEDverse have? i do appreciate rey's early 2000s brooding anime boy look, though. 5/10

Gilbert Durandal

WHY ARE THERE SO MANY SEED CHARS!!! this guy doesn't even look like a char clone, but he has the same voice actor and also apparently tries to drop shit on earth. we stan a king, honestly. 6/10 being in SEED deducts points

Hal Vizardt and Vladi Zarth

the wiki wont even give me a picture of these guys. 2/10 they get a point each

Ali Al-Saachez

i hate this guy. he sucks. normally i would find such endless villainy entertaining, but ali simply cannot work it in a way that's fun to watch or even in a way where you're like 'he's got a point.' he just sucks and i wish he could have been funny. we already have a char clone in graham anyway, so why are you here? bitch. 0/10 i was waiting for him to die

Graham Aker

he has all the tropes of being a char clone, and i loved him at first bc of his flair for drama and poetry, but alas! he got more and more sidelined for a different motherfucker. it's okay graham, i still love you! your mr. bushido phase was hilarious! 9/10 you deserved so much more

Full Frontal

hes getting points for the hilarious name but thats it. he is otherwise very boring. you cannot make me love a man just bc he is a literal char clone. 3/10

Zeheart Galette

AGE is also on my "deeply fascinated" list. eventually, eventually. i kinda dig this one's look. 7/10

Tatsuya Yuuki

initially, i hated yuuki bc i thought he was beating on middle schoolers for fun, but then i learned the dude is so goddamn passionate about gundam that he HAS to share it with others and honestly? king shit. while he's technically a char clone, i think he's actually a graham aker clone. the dude stans 00. an admirable position to be in. i love yuuki so much and hes my favorite build fighters character. 15/10 i will always respect the meijin

Captain Mask

the name is hilarious. hes got a cool mask too. i'll maybe watch recon one day bc of how ridiculous the reputation is. 8/10

Lady Kawaguchi

the rare female one, and proves that the kawaguchi name requires you to be extra as fuck. compared to yuuki's raw passion, she's cool and knows it, and doesn't need to flex. sadly doesn't get to do a lot. 10/10

McGillis Fareed

MCGILLIS MY BELOVED!!!! perhaps the only char clone that matters. this dude brings back the classic level of backstabbing, the supreme attractiveness, and in general, being an awful person. but i can't help but feel for the guy. he was trying his goddamn hardest to overturn a fucked up system. he also simply could not fathom having friends. mcgillis might only do the mask thing for a little and also wears a wig (McWiggis) but i forgive him, because the moves he does in bael are truly sexy. i adore mcgillis i have to rate him high but he cannot overtake the classic. 19/10 would let him betray me

Kyoya Kujo

even the wiki doesn't seem confident in this one. i like his look though. hes kinda got some gentle eyes, so i will assume he's the more quattro flavor of things. 6/10

Masaki Shido

BRUHHHH HE LOOKS LIKE A KNIGHT. 10/10

Honorable Mentions:

Master Asia

i didn't think he truly qualified as a char clone. he hits the villain thing and technically has some ideals aligned with char ? but he's a little too different. lacks majority of the archetype tropes. i still love him though 9/10

Vidar

hes got a mask and wants revenge. definitely not gaelio. the problem is, we already have mcgillis in IBO. i just don't register gaelio as being a char clone, because mcgillis is out here being the worst. gaelio is a wonderful character in his own right for all the opposite reasons that mcgillis is fantastic for being the worst. 10/10 i want nothing but the best for him

Ulube Ishikawa

just bc he has a mask covering half his face and is evil doesn't mean he's a char clone, wiki! and how dare you take away from schwarz just to be like "well ulube has a mask" WE HAVE ONE ALREADY!!! i also hate ulube. he is not a particularly charismatic character, but he isn't supposed to be. 2/10

and thus is my arbitrary ranking of the char clones. some people think char clones are bad. i for one, love them! i hope future entries have more masked men.