#wed play a bleep sound

[ao3tagoftheday]

[Image Description: Tags reading “Swearing, Or rather one instance of the fuck word”]

The AO3 Tag of the Day is: What's the fuck word?

[ldrmas]

OctoLolli Full Story

~~ This is based on https://www.instagram.com/p/CB_9reanS0H/ & https://www.instagram.com/p/CDC_IH5nLpg/  by  Ordinary__Art , please go check out her art!! All her art! SHES NOW ON TWITTER TOO AH I’M SO EXCITED!!

This is the full story from the part 1 post. The part 1 was just a tease but this is the full story! 

Btw OctoLolli is Remus and Logan, aka Intrulogical just so you all know! 

This will also mention Patton, Janus, etc. Remember I’m really bad at writing Remus so if he is a little oc I’m very sorry! I have no beta as well so if there are mistakes I apologize for those as well.  

Also Tagglist: @decadentscissorsapricotdeputy  Warnings for Swearing from Remus and Presmut attraction and activities!

 ~~

Logan could admit that he was becoming a hypocrite. He was getting on Thomas’s case anytime he had a chance to about sleeping in a perfect sleep schedule. And it had been that he would follow the same schedule, but lately that was not the case. After Janus had took his seat at the table, Thomas had been slightly more selfish. He had even admitted to his followers that he was finally taking a break.

Logan would never tell anyone, but he had been the one side who had been there to witness Janus’s break down dance in victory after Thomas made the announcement. It had made Logan begin to think. If Thomas could take a break for himself then Logan could be a little less strict. As long as Thomas was getting 7 hours of sleep like a grown adult should, then that was all that mattered. If seven hours were achieved then Logan was alright. He wouldn’t bother Thomas unless he deeply needed to step in and remind Thomas to sleep. That wasn’t the same for Logan. It didn’t just happen one night. It happened gradually.

He stayed up later and later and then it became that he would stay up for 24 hrs at a time. Being just a side, an imagined figment, he did not actually need to sleep. The sides slept so to perform at the best of their abilities. Not sleeping hadn’t hindered Logan yet so for now he would continue to perform his tasks until all the work was completed. But he didn’t always work in his room. It wasn’t his rooms fault. He couldn’t exactly blame his room which had been programmed by him. His room would in a way shut down at 8 every night. When he had been on a sleep schedule in the past, he had wanted it that way. But now not so much. He started working in the Mind Palace Common area, specifically at the table that was just outside the kitchen. He would only have a few lights on so he could see his screen but not bring notice that he was working in the room. The other sides usually were asleep when he was out there working, so he was never concerned about being found out. Then one night an interaction occurred that Logan didn’t quite suspect would happen.   The light sides and dark sides rooms were in two different parts of the MindScape. The Mind Palace usually looked Thomas’s apartment since it was the space they all basically knew by heart and could recreate without any trouble. Up the staircase was where one would find the “light” sides bedrooms. Janus’s room had just been recently added after the events of their latest video and though the others had been surprised, Logan hadn’t really been. Janus and Patton needed to start working together so that if Thomas came against another mature problem then they could confront it as a team instead of sending Thomas into another mental health breakdown. They couldn’t exactly learn to work together and start to get along better if Janus was still living and staying in the “dark” side. Logan didn’t like labeling them like they always had. Not one of the sides could be put in either category of light or dark. They were all just a part of Thomas and were doing the jobs given to them. No more no less. There was a “hidden” door attached to the stairs that led down to the “dark” side common space. The only thing about the dark sides space was that they didn’t have a kitchen. The only kitchen was in the light space. So both sides had to share the kitchen. Logan shouldn’t have been surprised that eventually he would meet one of the dark sides during his nightly escapades. Logan had taken a second to stretch and rub at his neck. The room was so quiet without his loud typing. It was in that moment that Remus slammed open the dark side door and stormed into the kitchen. In the second Remus had opened the fridge, the light of the appliance shined upon him and Logan was able to catch a glimpse of his outfit. His mouth immediately went dry and he felt like he couldn’t breathe. Remus was in a simple suite jacket and pants. The jacket was nightshade of black with mother of pearl lapels. The undershirt was Remus’s signature green color but instead of looking bad with the other parts of the suit it just added the perfect amount of color the creativity side needed to make the outfit look drop dead perfect. Logan was also able to see just a quick look at Remus’s face. He had on what appeared to be a very light shade of blush on the high of his cheeks and his hair was slightly curled as well. If Logan had to guess he would dare even say that it looked like Remus’s mustache had been groomed as well.

The dark side slammed the kitchen fridge door shut and started chugging the bottle of water he had grabbed. He must have been somewhat pissed to have grabbed a normal substance instead of the usual stuff Remus consumed. He still had yet to notice Logan was watching his every move. Usually Logan would have wanted to keep it that way. Remus would eventually go back down the stairs and Logan could resume his work. It appeared though that wasn’t something Logan had wanted. He was curious of why Remus was dressed this way and he wanted-no needed to know more about what was going on. So as Remus left the kitchen to go back downstairs, he was just about to grab the door, Logan spoke up.

“Remus?” “MO----ER F----KER, J----US SH-T ON A M---THER F—KING CRACKER!” Remus screamed and Logan held back a chuckle as the light side common place had took the liberty to bleep out Remus’s curse words. That was no doubt Patton’s doing. Remus turned on the lights and faced Logan, looking at him in complete disbelief. “What the f---king h-ll, Logic! You are g-d da-n lucky I didn’t have my mother f--king morningstar or I would have clobbered you to death! Je—s, why am I’m getting bleeped! What I’m saying isn’t as strong because of it!” Remus growled as he looked to the ceiling, as if that was the whole reason he was getting bleeped. “Why the h-ll are you sitting there in the dark?” “I’m working.” Logan answered simply as he gestured to his laptop. He closed it knowing that now he had Remus’s attention he wouldn’t be doing work for a while. Remus moved to the table and sat across from him chugging the water once more. Once he was done with that, he struck the water down upon the table, he leveled Logan with a glare. He wasn’t happy about Logic scaring him. He was usually the one to terrify the other sides. “You’re working out here why exactly?” “Do I get to ask a question if I answer yours?” “Like what we play 20 questions or something?” Remus chuckled as he swirled around the water in the bottle as if it was a fine wine. “I just don’t believe it would be justifiable if I answer and then you just leave me hanging.” Logan replied with a slight shrug. It was reasonable. Janus and Remus were known for not giving answers if they didn’t want to. “Fair enough. I’ll answer all your questions as long as you answer mine.” “You know me, Remus, I could never leave a question unanswered.” Logan answered as an agreement which brought a chuckle from the dark creativity side. “Yeah Yeah, Pocket Protector, now I believe you haven’t answered my question yet?” Remus commented as he waved his hand over his water bottle which magically refilled it. He took another sip from it never losing eyesight with Logan. “Oh yes, of course, I’m working out here because my room basically shuts down at 8 o’ clock every night.” “Shut down?” “Yes, the lights turn off and my power outlets don’t work. You know what I say no electronics 30 minutes before bed, so my room does that. But there is work to be done so I work out here now.” “Okaaaaaaaaaayy….” Remus drew out the word as he took a second to think about what exactly the Logical side was saying to him.

“So you work out here and let me see it’s…” Remus used a tentacle that appeared from his back to move his suit sleeve back. He looked down to a watch that probably just materialized on his wrist to make his point. “…It’s 5 am and how many days have you been out here working all night long?” “I’ve been doing this since the wedding video.” Logan replied truthfully, though he looked away for he realized how bad that sounded.   “That’s what I thought. Yoink!” Remus had actually said the word “yoink” out loud and it was then that Logan realized that one of Remus’s tentacles had wrapped around his laptop, sliding it toward the mustached man. Logan was too late to stop it from happening. One moment the laptop was wrapped in octopus tentacles and the next it disappeared in thin air. “Hey! Remus!” Logan shouted, nearly shooting up from his chair. “Remus, give that back right this moment!” “Nope.” Remus smacked his lips to emphasize the ‘p’. Logan glared deadly at him and held out his hand in demand for his laptop back. Remus only smirked. “Relax, nerdy wolverine. It’s in a safe place in my room. In the next 24 hrs if you sleep for a full 7 hours then you’ll get it back.” Remus explained as he admired one of his several tentacles as if it was a hand of nails. “And how exactly will you know that I have slept for that time?” “I have my ways.” The dark creativity side chuckled ominously as his eyes meet the Logical’s side. Logan shuddered either in fear or in curiosity, he couldn’t exactly tell in the moment. Did he really want to know how Remus would know that he slept? Most likely not. “Alright. I’m not happy about this but there is nothing I can do at this point to change it. Now I believe since you have gotten to ask your questions it is my turn. Why are you dressed as such?” “Heh. Well it’s story-time…” Remus paused with a smirk to let the joke linger. Logan suppressed his own small smile. He had always wanted to hear what “story-time” would sound like from the intrusive thoughts being. “…Anyway so you remember that post Thommy-salamony posted on Instagram the other day?” “The Spotify one with the flower crown, yes.” Logan recalled with an agreeing nod.

“Yep, that’s the one. Anyway, Janus and I were talking about it today. Annnnd long story short you would think with how long I’ve been in creation I would have learned by now that I can’t beat Janus in any bet. Since I haven’t learned it yet, I lost the bet and now I gotta wear this monkey suit for another six hours.” Remus explained once he glanced at the watch on his human wrist once again. “I have been in this for so long that Janus has taken one million and one pictures of me on his phone and if I had to deal with him for one more second I would have done several unpleasant things to him. I came up here to get a f—cking break.” “I understand if this may be rude to say but may I too take a picture of you?” Logan took a chance to ask but wasn’t surprised when Remus growled at him.

“No, you may f—king not! I’ll tell Janus that you want some of his pics, I’m sure our snake-boi will share them.” Logan nodded knowing that was reasonable. Remus was probably on his last straw and the logical side didn’t wish to further anger the manifestation being of dark creativity. Remus laid out on the table with a deep sigh.

Logan could now see just how weary the green colored side seemed and he felt sorry for him.

“Well, despite you hating your attire, I am grateful that you came up here and I have gotten this chance to see you. You say your clothes are a monkey suit, but I must say you wear this suit quite beautifully. It compliments you very well.” Logic went on to say as he leaned back in his seat but didn’t look away from Remus. One could even say he was gazing at Remus as if he was in a trance of sorts. It was almost as if he was trying to take several mental snap shots of Remus to save for himself. It also could have been that he was trying to take in as much detail of Remus’s outfit as quickly as he could in fear that he would never see it again. Remus too was gazing at the navy colored side but for different reasons. “Back up there, Teach, did you…did you just call me …beautiful?” Remus asked nervously as if he was fearful that he had misheard Logan to begin with. Logan coughed into his fist, and since the intrusive thoughts had turned on the lights, they were both able to see the red start to spread across his cheeks. “I did, though I believe I said you are wearing the suit beautifully, which yes means you are beautiful in the suit.” “What the f—ck is that suppose to mean?” Remus asked wanting Logan to explain further on what he was saying. “Well…what I mean is…” Logan started as the blush now was fully engulfing his face. He also looked away from Remus so that he may gather his thoughts.

“…Your regular outfit suits you quite favorably as well, but your current outfit is, I must admit, quite surprising. In a superb way, I mean. I must say that you look so elegant in a way that I frankly never considered that you could….” Logan paused as he too came to the same realization of Remus. He now understood how what he was saying sounded. His blush deepened. 

“Ap-Apologizes, Remus. I-I don’t quite understand where that came from… I think…Please, excuse me.” Logan tried to get up from his seat to escape but Remus was faster. His tentacles had swiftly wrapped around the logical side securing him to the chair. Remus wouldn’t allow him to leave that easily. Though it wasn’t as if Logan struggled against the octopi appendages. Logic knew he would not be able to get away from Remus’s hold.  

He only gulped audibly as Remus came around the table and sat upon it right in front of the teacher like side. The intrusive thoughts being perched upon the table yet leaned forward cupping Logan’s jaw affectionately in his palm.

“Remus…”

“Oh, Lolo, I finally understand. You, Mr. Logic, are Thomas’s suit kink.” “I beg your pardon?”

“Oh, come on Lollipop,” Remus laughed as he leaned back on the table. “You of all sides understand what my job as “Dark Creativity” is composed of. Intrusive Thoughts, nightmares, blasphemous thinking,  etc etc. And we can’t forgot the juiciest of all?” “Sexual Desires.”

“Very good, Smart Heart Bear! Anyhow, sexual desires includes sexy kinks, fetishes, and or fantasies. I know all of Thomas’s kinks from A to Z. I mean let’s be honest my brother is a f—king deer in the headlights once romance gets to the R-rated scenes. I mean sure RowRow can sweep any partner off their feet but once we to the bedroom, then it’s me time!” “Now so back what to I was saying, kinks! There have always been one or two I couldn’t for the life of me figure out, but I had found where most of them had come from. Oh, do you want to know what Patton’s is?” “Not particularly.”

“Sure you do! Patton’s is baking sex. Or sex in the kitchen. Or whatever he wants to call it. Your Happy Pappy has some pretty nasty thoughts when it comes to cooking twine, let me tell ya.” Remus snickered while Logan suppressed a shudder as he even considered what scenarios that thought could lead to.

“But anyway, like I said, I could see where most of them had come from, but I never had yours. I’m so stupid, I should have seen it. You are turned on by men in full suits. This outfit is turning you on. How did I not see that the man that is always in a tie was my connection to Thomas’s suit fetish? It’s so boringly oblivious now that I see how flushed you are in front of me.” Remus observed while reaching with one of his tentacles to start undoing his cuff links. Logan watched like a man possessed as the cuff links came off and the sleeves wrists unbuttoned. His mouth dried as the sleeves were slowly rolled up by Remus’s elegant fingers. Once both sleeves were comfortably up on Remus’s arms, he also took a second to run his right hand through his curled locks. The simple act turned the tips of Logan’s ears red.

The Intrusive Thoughts side never looked as hawt as he did just then, and Logan would have probably given anything in that moment to freeze time, so that he may enjoy the sight for as long as he wished.

“Holy sh-t, you really are turned on! Heh, must suck to be attracted to the bad guy, huh Logic?” And just like that Logan was snapped out of his distressed state and sat up straight in the chair. The lust that he had once felt was gone and now he wished he had just one arm free. He wanted to reach out to Remus desperately. “Remus…I know this won’t sound as if I’m being sincere because you will think I’m just saying this because of your clothes but I’m still going to say it.”

“Remus, I never once thought of you as the villain.” Logan took the moment to make sure the green colored side was seriously looking at him.

“You are not a bad guy, Remus. You did your job as a side nothing more nothing less. You can’t help that you were dealt the dreadful cards but just because you were, it does not in any way make you evil. Or the villain or the antihero.” “Or even a dark sid-“ Logan gasped loudly as the tentacle suddenly released him and he was roughly pulled forward. A hand had wrapped around his tie and jerked him towards the table, nearly causing him to fall off his chair.

More than that, his gasp was silenced as lips fell upon his in a deep bruising kiss. It was a surprise and just for a moment something within Logan yelled at him to pull away, yet he quickly dismissed such a thought. Instead he leaned into the action and once he got his bearings returned the passion that Remus was sharing with him. It was only when he placed his hand on Remus’s cheek that he realized the other was crying. “Shut up.” Remus wept once the two finally separated but Remus didn’t let go of the tie. He held onto it in a death grip. “You gotta shut up! You-you can’t say things like that when your looking so f--kable, Lo.”

“No.” Logan replied once he was able to catch his breath.

“I won’t stop saying it. You need to know what I think! You need to know that even without the suit, I have always thought you were beautiful. That I secretly have had a small crush on you.” Logan admitted as he tried to turn his head away. Remus stopped him by grabbing his jaw once again. “F—k, Logan.” Remus whispered then brought their lips together again for another kiss. This one just as passionate as the first but was shorter. Remus smirked at the whimper Logan let out once he had pulled away. “Me too. I was mad crushing on you for so long, Apple Watch.” Logic chuckled at the nickname, knowing there was no meanness behind the words. They sat there in silence just holding onto one another.  If there was certainly a moment that Logan wanted to last for eternity, then it would have been this one. The two of them in each other’s embrace letting their feelings be shared by touch alone. “This sucks.” Remus finally groaned as he nuzzled his forehead against the blue colored side’s. “What do you mean?” “I want to f—k you so bad right now. I want to make love to you for so long that you wouldn’t even be able to get up if Thomas called for you.” Remus pressed his lips to Logan’s once more and though he made sure to make it last longer than the second time, he still pulled away too soon for Logic’s liking. “But I won’t. You need sleep. I may be intrusive thoughts, but I won’t take advantage of you when your practically dead on your feet.  I hate to say it, but we waited this long, what’s seven more hours, am I right?” Logan grasped onto the hand that was still secure around his tie. “You promise me that we will pursue this after I sleep? I won’t just wake up and have to go back to believing that I never even cross your mind?”

Logan’s fears were answered with another kiss, a gentle reassuring one this time. “Seven hours, then you’ll never be rid of me again, Glasses.” Logic chuckled at the answer, though it seemed forced. He didn’t want to continue these next few hours alone. Not when they had at last admitted out loud and to each other about what they felt for one another. Remus was right though, Logan was dead on his feet. These last few moments without his laptop had given his body the chance to let the months of backed up exhaustion wash over him. He was convinced he wouldn’t even had been able to stay awake through foreplay let alone other sexual activities. He had Remus’s word. Once he awoke, they would explore this relationship further, or at least he hoped this thing between them would turn into a relationship.

Logan jumped as Remus deeply chuckled. “Go, Logan. Go to bed. I can practically hear your thoughts from over here. We’ll talk when you’re up.” Logan rose from the chair but before sinking out he was the one who initiated a kiss this time. He even made sure to run his tongue along Remus’s lips causing the neon green side to groan loudly in need.

Logan pulled away with a victorious smirk. “Until then, Octo.” Remus smirked as the Logical side sank down through the floor. He ran his fingertips along his lips still faintly feeling Logan’s own lips against them. “I’ll see you soon, Lollipop.” ~ Bonus ~ Remus did his best to stay away. He really had but as the hours dragged on and on, he was getting more and more impatient. It was finally just one hour left. Remus wouldn’t dare wake the side but that didn’t mean he couldn’t go to his room. Right? Remus sank out in front of Logan’s door quietly. It was now the middle of the afternoon. The other sides were up and about doing their daily endeavors. He was thankful that Thomas hadn’t called for them all. He probably would have tried, and of course fail since he was imaginary, to punch Thomas in the face if he had even tried to call for Logan while the side finally slept.  

Remus didn’t think on that any further and instead tried Logan’s door. If he stood out here any longer one of the others might see him. It was a shock that the door opened for him. He didn’t wait too long to think about it and quickly shuffled into the room, silently closing the door behind him. He hadn’t awakened Logan by entering the room. That was a good start. He crossed the room with ease since there was a soft glowing night light on the far side of the room. Once he made it to the edge of Logan’s bed it was there that he paused. Would it be too bold of him to join Logan? He wouldn’t touch the sleeping Logical side but would it still be too much if he got into the blue side’s bed? Before his thoughts to tumble into the mess of what ifs, he took the chance. He let his shirt disappear but left on a pair of comfy sleep pants. He eased into the open space in Logan’s bed and happily sighed as he sank into the perfect pillows and mattress. He let himself drift between awake and sleep, but his eyes opened as he felt Logan turn towards him as the hour came to an end. Logan didn’t react once he felt another being in his bed, he just rolled towards it in curiosity. Once he saw the wisps of white bangs and the constellation of freckles upon ivory skin, a smile shaped upon his face. “Good morning, Octo.” “Morin’, Lollipop.”

~The End!!~~

[bilgisticallykosher]

Selfishness vs. Selfishness Redux

Pre-episode thoughts. I don't think they're going to address the dark side Everybody-already-knew-that thing right away. I'm still thinking Deceit's gonna be Virgil, but I'm also not so certain that's going to wind up going down. Because there's a lot of other stuff to get into. We know from the first Asides that stuff between Virgil and Patton is growing, and simmering. It's coming, and while that's in the future, there's probably going to be more build-up here. Is it that Patton knew about Virgil's past? Is it something else entirely? This is going to be a two hour episode, geez. 

Also, I can't believe he's actually going to the wedding. Idk. All those people saying he got the date wrong, though? First of all, Logan is in charge of the schedule, he'd never let that happen, how dare? And also, I always double check dates and invitations for stuff. I really doubt Virgil wouldn't have looked at the invitation and checked the information again. Watch me be totally wrong now. 

I don't know who I think the cloaked figure is. Could be Deceit ("like a freaking Scooby Doo villain"), could be Thomas himself. Probably not Organization XIII, but I'm not completely eliminating the option, let me have this. 

Things I'd like, but am 99% certain won't happen; Deceit's name (which I'm both hoping and expecting to not start with D), a new side, Remus and Deceit interacting on camera, or really Remus at all. Except for that green score of BOOBS, I maintain that's Remus's contribution. 

ALRIGHT, LET'S GO, I'M NOT READY!!!!

First impression of the thumbnail. You vs. Yourself???? Oh my gosh. Ohhhh, I'm freaking out. Patton looks so apprehensive, and I don't know if that's on general, or because of Roman or in response to Roman, because Roman looks so annoyed at Patton! He's so angry oh my gosh. I mentioned I wasn't ready, right? Okay. Okay. So their sprites are different styles, which is cool. Patton's looks risk-based stroll around town type of RPG, Roman's looks fighting style. 

The options for the character select???? Oh my gosh, that's. Hi, Remus. Anyway, uh, I don't know what this means, but there's three character options on top and- DARK SIDES ARE SEPARATE FROM LIGHT SIDES! Oh gosh, I was thinking maybe it was something to do with specifically Logan. Ooh, Deceit's in his lawyer outfit, nice touch.  THERE'S AN EXTRA BLANK PLAYER OPTION. I don't know if that means he'll be revealed this episode, or just that he exists. I mean, we just had Deceit's logo, Remus's reveal and name reveal… here goes.

IT STARTS WITH THE VIDEO GAME??? THIS IS THE INTRO????? THE WEDDING??????!!!!!!! Oh hey word crush. Oh hey, it's the couple! Starting to think this is a dream or fantasy, btw. Also, Lee and Mary Lee sound like...Esteban and Valerie? Maybe? Idk. Omg, Life is pain. 

This is awkward, beautiful. Pfft, hence the marriage. Photographer is great, no idea who he or the emcee are. Ooh. Crushed. 

INTRO??? EXCUSE ME??? Oh was SvS originally on 3/31? Yeah, good, play a review like all of us haven't been obsessing over what happened last time. "APRIL 13" I'm just going thi pause forever now. Oh this is going to be the angry walk in that was previewed in the bloopers, I can tell. Oh no. OH NO! And it is at night and he seriously freaking actually went to the wedding????

Oh my gosh he's so angry. Ohhh, Patton rethinking his phrasing, nice. You should never→I'm surprised that you etc. Oh Roman! Oh, maybe we should… not review. Oh boy. 

Oh there's Patton's avatar. In then guitar hero thing. Oh, Thomas is associated with the color white, confirmed??? I like how they did the notes there. So much detail. The talk sprites are great, but the expressions on the dancing sprites are worth paying attention to. Okay, Patton's still very, um, defensive, I guess is the word? Thomas is angry and bereft and confused and full of doubt, and Roman's heavily on the confused side (ha) about him aligning with Deceit. This is why he stole his hat. Great animation work, everyone, that was fantastic, artists! 

"Why didn't I just talk to them before the wedding?" THOMAS. Also, because Deceit specifically prevented Logan from being too close to the courtroom scene by benching him and not asking him what his idea of a compromise was. "I brought that up," well, you did, but Deceit kinda made it seem like you were suggesting lying to them, so you got shut down. Sorry, Ro. Listen, I love Deceit, but the boy's a manipulator. 

We learn to predict the future!!! Roman, no. Woah, Patton's just being completely dismissive. I mean he's been through some hard times the last few episodes, minus LNTAO, but damn. Oh. Roman's very much defending Patton. This forebodes very badly. This is going to explode terribly. Oh no. 

Okay, so, the thing with the feral cats. Is Roman okay? Did someone do this to him? More importantly, did he do this to me? Also, on a serious note, I'm super shocked Deceit hasn't come in yet, because he (and Thomas, and arguably Patton) is obviously regretting going to the wedding. I mean, Virgil's not coming in right away because of the reveal at the end of DWIT, but- hey where's Logan?! Logan and Deceit should both totally be here! *gasp* Except in the one on one episodes (Heart vs. Mind, My Negative Thinking, Logince; the argument) it's always primarily been the two sides that are featured with the others either not there or off-screen or making small cameos. But Deceit was and is an important part of this decision past, present, and going forward! 

Oooh, I like the Lee and Mary Lee backstory. Hm. Patton does bring good points, but. I still agree with- oh, Thomas just solidly saying no made me snort. Okay, so speaking of the coin bleeping, why the video games? I know there's more to come with it, how do they come into play? Oh okay metaphor. 

That was clearly not the good ending, Roman. Bringing up Is Thomas A Good Person again. OOH xylophone, is he a-comin'? Oh he's directly blaming Patton. Wow, Roman. 

A BAGEL?! Oh, game sssssssstore. Really? Frogger, Pat? 16 graphics. Oh there's the hotdogs. OH and there's the cloaked guy! Smashing our theories. That does not seem like Sondheim. 

The puns, oh my gosh, brilliant. Getting to the meat of them here. Gosh these graphics are fantastic. 6AM dull. 

Oh. Hm. Technically, he does not have to give him the 'dog. The building tension is fascinating. 

HI, LOGAN! Patton looking real uncomfortable at "regret." I mean, they all know they regret it now, right? Roman making fun of behoove, that's so funny, I have no idea why. Seriously, whoever's doing the art, I'm dying at Logan's expressions. Woah good thing viewers have the pause button. I'm all for not buying X-mas decorations. I'm doing my part, goyim. 

I'm counting "it's not like Kingdom Hearts" in lieu of that having been Organization XIII. Oh boy, Patton. Right thing vs. Feeling good vs. Feeling good about doing the right thing. This is falling apart. Patton's noise. 

BOOBS omg Deceit is Bowser. I love that painting in the background! Scutes! Time went from limited to being lost to poorly spent to wasted! I'm standing by the purple being Virgil. Fyi, in Judaism, doing a good thing for the wrong reasons doesn't matter, because you're still doing the good thing, even if it's just for the reward. There's a thing about it with Avraham and a King.

Roman's getting close to breaking. Reptilian rapscallian guy. And who's to say he can't be doing it for the reward and to help people? 

"... an individual's happiness and the amount of selfless acts…" that should be number, not amount, Logan! Can't judge good deeds only by how good you feel when you do them. 

Okay, here we go. How do we know what's Right? Killing and stealing is illegal everywhere, yes, Thomas, what are you doing, Thomas???

Oh my gosh, not the trolley problem. They're referring to Deceit as Denial and Roman as Passion! Oh gosh, that looks like Joan, Talyn, Dot, Valerie, and Terrence, and Leo by himself, maybe? Oh geez, I jolted. Logan index carding for trolley problem. 

Unus Annus is right, the trolley problem is stupid. Oh my gosh, Logan's giant wall of text physically pushing Patton back, I spit all over my screen. Skip All. 

Roman's… blaming himself? Oh!!! Are we getting Roman's insecure arc???!!! This is a complex issue, and Patton's having a hard time backing down, and everyone's feeling bad.

Scared?! I hear music! NO. Why is he scared, oh my gosh?????? That's not a tired metaphor. Oh! I've heard of hypoxia! It was hypothesized (and disproven) to be the reason for a specific Bermuda Triangle incident. 

Good point, Logan. Regarding theory and in the moment instincts. Remus mention with intrusive thoughts! Shocked that Logan is arguing for leisure time. Logan's self satisfied smirk at the self-sacrifice. GLITCHY! Oh he's a frog. Lilypadton. 

Oh my gosh I'm getting so stressed. Yes, thank you, Logan for the scream. I… don't. The conscientious comment. No, it's not. This seems… Deceit-y. IT IS! SHARP SIDE OH MY GOSH! Oh, he didn't rise up, he popped out in the freaking dialogue box, NO, FRICK IT WAS RIGHT THERE! And the Nietzsche and the specific examples that he used!!! I'm so angry! I DIDN'T THINK HE'D TAKE LOGAN'S PLACE AGAIN! I MISSED THE SIGNS! 

Hey guys, look, it's Deceit. Bull… frog. Lord of the lies. Oh! 8-bit Deceit theme. Okay, the first thing Deceit said about him not doing it on purpose was nice, but yeah, those words striking him is accurate. Yeesh, harsh. 

Is Patton eating his own words? Oh, uh, is anyone going to acknowledge he hit Thomas? Is that telling of the situation instead of just being a funny background event? 

The crick in Thomas's neck is so funny. SNAKES ON THE PLANE!!! ...Hm. Happy that he brought that up. Oh my gosh, Deceit's spluttering, he's like so bad at things sometimes, I love it. 

Logan! No, don’t do that, everybody appreciates you! Double curse? Pffffft, Logan. Deceit…definitely smiling at Logan's logic. Deceit is interesting here. Oh wow, yikes. He's really fascinating here. Legitimately complimentary? Oh, no, kind of not, maybe. Roman looks distressed.

"...Trees?" Roman's super pumped up. Good for him! Ha, his imitation. Deceit looking confused? Patton looking all sorts of things, I really think that Deceit is being genuine here- NAME?! I'D THIS HAPPENING? Why is he stripping? His, no, what does his glove have to do with his name? 

………. Janice? Did he say Jenus or Janice. It sounded like Janice. Deceit. No. Oh, burn, Roman. Damn, he almost got me. His name is not Janice. No. It's not. Don't even. Deceit was being so straight(ha)forward for the past couple of minutes. Awww, Roman. Insecurity addressing time? Wait, why is Deceit nodding at the hero thing? His lip is trembling, his voice is cracking and oh no! Roman just sank out.

Don't call him Janice, that's not his name. Oh he's being genuine again. Patton's talking about himself. WAIT WHAT. He had a five second cameo, omg. 

Yeah, those are the easier questions. No, Deceit, bad Deceit. Man, his facial expressions in this episode. Fractionally fiendish fibber. Oh, I like the reasons for Deceit being a part of him! That's… cute? Oddly cute, maybe. So, freaking how far in the future is the Asides? 

Stop calling him Janice, that's not his name. Oh, Deceit and Thomas bonding. That snort, oh my gosh. Oh, serious Deceit again! That reaction to "you're right" is oddly similar to that fake laugh at the end of Embarrassing Phases. 

………. Virgil's not here yet. His reveal isn't being addressed. Accepting Deceit. That's why he's so pissed at Patton in Asides. The next episode proper they're going to reveal that Deceit's accepted, more or less, and Patton was a big part of that, hugely changing his mind, that's why he's so pissed at him!!!

April 30th? Oh is this Lee and Mary Lee? I was wrong on the voices. Door-yelling! Hm. I mean. It's nice that they're acknowledging him, but I really don't think that sways the situation one way or another. Cute more background, and Thomas being awkward. They. This could have been instead of the wedding. Kingdom Hearts again! 

Oh hi, Patton and Deceit. He seems annoyed at the situation. Patton and Deceit bonding. Hi again, Leslie. Wild. 

This video really didn't go at all how I thought it would. Roman was barely miffed at Patton. Oh man, this was intense. I. Oh man. I need to process a lot. But I think we're on the right path, here. Janice is not his name!

Okay, I went on tumblr and two seconds in, I saw Janus, which I looked up and that makes way more sense. Another, more condensed post to follow. And several thousand reblogs.

[strrne]

Give Me a Signal, Ch.5

Chapters: 5/?

Word count (so far): 13043

AO3  Ch.1 Ch.2  Ch.3 Ch.4 Ch.6  Ch.7

Summary: When Padmé Amidala is unable to contact Coruscant while negotiating a loan on Scipio, the Senate suspects trouble, and sends Anakin Skywalker to go check on her. Of course, the resourceful senator isn’t really in any trouble – don’t flatter yourself, Rush Clovis – but there’s definitely some brewing.

(or; rewrite of the tcw S6 Clovis arc; anidala + a gen very plotty plot)

Chapter 5

”Have you seen my 87’s?!” Anakin demanded from Obi-Wan before the Jedi Master had barely taken a step into his former Padawan’s temple quarters.

Obi-Wan tilted his head, not entirely thrilled with what he was looking at. Tousled hair sounded too deliberate, too carefully arranged into some roguishly appealing look – no, this was disheveled hair, framing a pair of red-black under-eyes and a matching scowl.

“Your eighty-sevens?” Obi-Wan echoed, as Anakin didn’t bother waiting for an answer, and instead dove headfirst into an already half-scoured drawer, and started tossing things out, “Well that depends. Would that be the 87 times you've crashed your ship within the last week?”

“Ha, ha,” Anakin interjected, now doing some sort of handstand on top of the only barely heavy enough piece of furniture, and still somehow managing to rummage the contents.

“Or the 87 times you’ve already rolled your eyes at me during this conversation? In both of which cases, yes, I was there to witness it.”

“Ha. Ha.”

“Or could you possibly be referring to the 87 conversations we haven’t had about you and Senator Amidala?”

Anakin turned his head, but Obi-Wan was having trouble taking him seriously in his present position; hands gripping on the drawer edges, toes almost hitting the ceiling, Jedi tunics and undershirts falling all over his reddening face. The Jedi Master shook his head, with fondness. Was it beneath the Chosen One to do something like a regular person? At least he once used to find new and exciting ways to assert his maverick status. Now the attempts were just getting more mundane and desperate.  

“Anakin, get down from there.”

At his Master’s orders, Anakin performed his 88th crash landing within the last week, making Obi-Wan grin and shake his head. The younger Jedi just gave a 'go on, if you dare' sort of gesture with as much dignity as he could muster.

Obi-Wan straightened his shoulders - he needed to do some mustering of his own - and while he did, Anakin took shelter behind his tinkering table. He grabbed a seemingly random tool and challenged it to a staring contest.  

“Anakin, you’ve met Satine,” Obi-Wan finally began. “You know I once harbored… feelings for her.” The Jedi Master sighed, already exhausted, wondering how deeply he would have to delve into this topic until he got something out of Anakin. The boy's shields were up - which in itself was an indication of something.

“It’s not that we’re not allowed to have these feelings. It’s… natural.”

Anakin made a barely audible, frustrated sound. Obi-Wan felt that this conversation was dangerously close to turning into another generic lecture about attachments - which Anakin seemed to all but tune out these days - not to mention an excavation of some painful memories of his own. He'd have to try something new. The 'fate of the Republic' could be at stake, according to his bad feeling anyway - and if that turned out not to be the case in the end, well, then he would formally renounce feelings for all eternity.

On a whim, Obi-Wan spluttered out a string of words that neither Anakin nor himself could make out.

“What?”

Obi-Wan drew a deep breath.

“What exactly is the nature of the relationship between you and… Padmé?”

Anakin stared at him, with caution in his eyes, although it seemed the outermost layer of surprise had been scraped off by Obi-Wan’s initial forewarning. He now sat down behind the table, holding in his hand some kind of model spaceship. He peered inside the minuscule cockpit, pulled out some sort of funny-looking wrench, then put it down in obvious disappointment.

“A 44 won’t cut it,” he muttered under his breath.

“Anakin, answer the question.”

“You didn't answer mine. For your information," he brandished the tiny tool like a weapon, "a 87 looks like this, but bigger, and with a sort of a mount between the jaws. Oh, and the Senator and I are just friends.”

Obi-Wan scratched his head, wishing he had written down the lines he had thought up in the shower this morning. He had tried to approach the topic softly; tried to – as they called it – relate to him. What could he have possibly done with Padmé that he had not with Satine?

“Anakin, I have eyes.”

“Yes, Master, and let me just say, that dreary tunic really brings out the color.”

Dreary? Obi-Wan clasped the hem instinctively. So uncalled-for...

“I can sense that you’re upset about her working with Rush Clovis.”

This at least brought about a reaction - an immediate one - as Anakin slammed another bewildering piece of durasteel against the table.

“Last time they worked together,” Anakin snarled, “he almost got Senator Amidala killed, and I would’ve been responsible.”

“How so? She is her own person, and responsible for her own life.”

Anakin glared at him, recognizing the insinuation.

“What do you expect me to say?” he scoffed, before a very curious expression spread on his features. He paused for a moment, and his voice faltered ever so slightly as he added, without blinking, “That we have been secretly married for the past two years? Hoping to start a little family once this blasted war finally ends? To hell with the Order and their rules?”

The words startled Obi-Wan before he fully registered their meaning. But as soon as he did, he began examining them more closely. There were two options really: this was pure, unadulterated sarcasm, a form of communication he himself was dearly fond of. Or this was the so-called ‘lying by telling the truth’ ploy, a maneuver he had also used in the past. Usually very effective… usually.

“...Alright then,” Obi-Wan said simply, trying to process the notion. “Big wedding?"

Anakin seemed to think they were still trading jokes.

“Bit noisy."

"Noisy?"

"Threepio wouldn't stop making speeches."

And perhaps they were? A tinge of doubt seeped into Obi-Wan’s mind. It was just too ridiculous, too bold, even of him. Not to mention the very level-headed Senator… no. The insolent kid was just trying to avoid another scolding by playing off the whole thing as a joke altogether.

Anakin, a married man? For two years… before even being knighted? Marriage – with a ceremony! Official documents! Probably some kind of symbolic jewelry… and a devotion far more passionate, far more selfish than that of serving the Galaxy. If it was the truth, there was no sermon spectacular enough that he could give. Why had he ever bothered? This whelp was already laughing soundlessly in his face, and so was that wily politician… his supposed wife. His wife!

Obi-Wan mentally shook his head for even having entertained the idea. Something was going on between them, that much was for certain, but this… this was too much.

“Very good, Anakin, you can quit making fun of me now.”

-

Clovis closed his eyes and tried again. A lot was riding on the success of this investigation. A good majority of the Senators didn’t trust him, his colleagues would sooner or later find out he was attempting to bring them down, a Jedi Knight was most likely plotting his murder, and Padmé...  

No – most importantly, for once in his life, for the love of everything the war had not yet tainted… he wanted to do the right thing.

The analysis sounded a bleep on its arrival.

It had come up blank again.

“Clovis, I’m exhausted,” Padmé confessed, getting up from the couch and walking up to the window. “Please, answer me honestly – is the evidence adequate? Is it enough to convict the Core Five?”

Clovis thought about the question long and hard, leaning his head on his fist, until his knuckles almost penetrated the skin on his lower jaw.

“It’s… it's enough to bring them to trial.”

Padmé spun around, running her fingers through her fairly simple, curled hairstyle.

“And when they do stand trial…” she twirled a ringlet around her finger.

“Padmé, I’m sorry, but I don’t know,” Clovis confessed, no longer bothering to hide his concern. He made a frustrated wave at the screen, “I think… I think this might be the wrong file. It shows that the accounts exists, and that they’re not grouped with the regular accounts, and have some special features… but it won't display any details, and it -well, you can't see the money flowing from the Republic account to these ones. They can simply insist that these are just some empty accounts they created as a spare, or something. We can keep digging further, but…”

“Nothing will likely turn up. I understand,” Padmé said, turning her head away. Clovis put down the processor and went up to join her at the window. She was very evidently keeping a professional distance, but, like Clovis, seemed to have dropped some of her politician's pretenses of self-possession and stoicism.

“What are we going to do, Clovis? Even if they fail to notice the stolen files, they'll never let us into the vault again.”

Clovis gave a deep sigh, motioning restlessly without saying anything, until Padmé was compelled to ask him what he was thinking about.

“The thing is, Padmé… I don't think the Senate even needs proof. I don't think they'll wait for proof.”

“Why would you think that?” Padmé questioned, sounding almost shocked – or affronted.

“You saw how they welcomed me. Everything from 'This is a most interesting development'” to… 'we will keep a watchful eye on you, Clovis'. They still see me as a traitor and a Separatist. They probably think I'm trying to hide the evidence, with- with some kind of reverse psychology trick. What I'm trying to say is, they don't want the evidence from me. Should we manage to acquire it, they'll only accept it because of you, because you're here to legitimize it.”

Padmé lowered her eyes, nodding gravely as she stroked her embroidered blue sleeve.

“But trust me,” Clovis went on, “they will get the evidence. They'll find a way into that vault alright. You see, it's not just me they despise. It's not just the Core Five that they don't trust. You've already heard the whispers, haven't you? They hate my home and my people, and seem to think we want to pick a fight with the Republic.”

“Clovis, that's–“ Padmé began, now definitely shocked and affronted. Clovis just shook his head.

“There are already rumors going around about what's really going on with our holo signal. It's all over the holonet. They're saying the Clan as well as the police department employ private networks to communicate in secret, and that all the mechanics are all bribed into not doing anything. And why is our law enforcement suddenly under suspicion? Any guesses? Why, it is because a pair of Jedi Generals recently got themselves arrested. Your Senate now believes all our laws archaic and worthless - and no doubt, cannot wait for an excuse to invade Scipio and instate the Republic constitution at the earliest opportunity. Some sources have already speculated that Skywalker's imprisonment was some kind of open declaration of war – which we haven't been able to correct, and you know why? Because of the connectivity issues. It's a vicious circle."

Clovis paused, but not nearly long enough for Padmé to interject. In fervor, he suddenly grabbed her by the shoulders, causing her to recoil and look away, “You have heard the whispers, right? Or have you just willfully turned your head away, as you Republic Senators always do? For pity's sake…I overheard the Supreme Chancellor himself badmouthing the Muuns and making a fuss over his golden boy Skywalker. He is the most powerful person in the Galaxy, Padmé, and if that is what he thinks of my Muun brothers...”

Padmé was still silent, but her expression seemed to betray more knowledge than she let on. Before Clovis could question her about it, she spoke instead, “Clovis, I don't pretend to have all the answers or even the consolations. So forgive me if I ask you a question instead. Something I still don't understand.”

“Do tell.”

“General Kenobi told me that the law is still technically valid, but mostly overlooked, and, I imagine, rarely ever applicable. Why, in this rare case when it did apply, was it then enforced? Who brought it up? And how did it all turn into such a complete and utter farce? I'm afraid I was too busy with the contract on Scipio to truly appreciate who was responsible.”

Clovis sighed, trying to buy himself some time to calculate what parts of the truth he wanted to tell – as well as ponder if he even knew the entirety of it.

It had all begun when he had – rudely – eavesdropped on Padmé after she had initially refused to cooperate with him, only to learn that her holo call to Coruscant hadn't gotten through. She had surmised that the Senate would suspect trouble and send 'help' – which in the Republic's case, always seemed to mean a pair of 'peacekeepers' with rock-levitating abilities. He had surmised that because Padmé was involved, said help would most certainly turn out to be General Skywalker, with whom he'd already had one mutually unpleasant encounter – whom he had since looked into – just enough to confirm his suspicion that the man was neither a mere pilot nor in any way indifferent to Padmé Amidala.

For a moment, he had accepted the man's arrival as a necessary evil – like a tropical storm on a planet one had studied and still chosen to live on – until he’d realized it wasn’t just his face the gale would whisk against.

He had studied Scipian law long and meticulously. He had worked hard to acquire this position. He’d always been driven and diligent, he had memorized every letter, even the most nugatory footnotes – because he was going to be a hero; because he was personally going to make sure that the negotiations with the Republic would proceed smoothly, whether or not there would be a corruption to expose. He would regain Republic's trust as their representative. He would do everything right, and nothing, nothing – no trifling detail nor full-blown scandal – was going to jeopardize that.

That's when he had remembered one of those trifling details – Article 356; the correct negotiation protocol. What if someone else had done their homework? What if the trifling detail was a full-blown scandal just waiting to happen?  What if there was just one high-ranking Muun official who shared that overzealous servant boy’s sensibilities? No – not on his watch – preventing any and all of such scenarios was his personal responsibility.

The fact that it would probably be Skywalker he'd get to send packing was just an added bonus.

Of course, he wouldn’t be there personally. The Jedi he expected to welcome (not) didn't seem like the rule-abiding type, and he definitely wouldn't take any orders from him. He was better off keeping this from Padmé as well – namely, the fact that he had personally made sure a Republic scout wouldn't be allowed to ascertain her safety – law-based reason or not, he had yet to regain her trust.

Clovis had sent an anonymous memo with the Clan’s signet to one of the lower-level assistants, with an order to contact the law enforcement and have them deport the Jedi on their arrival. Padmé would only find out much later, and none of this could be traced back to him.

What had happened at the spaceport, he still didn’t know. He did suspect the Jedi to be violent, if not downright psychotic. If he had refused to leave, his arrest had probably been unavoidable  – much like bad weather. But even then, Clovis had never expected the police to cling onto an archaic law with such stubbornness, to the point of tainting and almost spoiling the contract negotiation.

He knew that the Clan held power even the police department – hence their ability to finally incorporate Skywalker's release into the contract – so why even have a symbolic investigation? Why even hold him at all, if he was just going to be released anyway without charges?

He had to admit, it did almost seem like someone was purposely trying to cause a public outcry.

As well as a personal one. For Clovis was still convinced he’d eventually have to brave a full-blown hurricane; one with a personal vendetta against a mountain cabin that had already crumbled once and only newly been rebuilt.

They had also released the other Jedi, Kenobi, early. Why only him? What were the odds that someone else, besides himself, had a personal aversion to General Skywalker, and wanted to go about expressing it in the completely opposite way? Pretty high, now that he thought about it. But really, what was the point of angering an already angry man – who would benefit from that anger? What was the use?

“Padmé, I… I don't know.”

-

At midnight, in his quarters, Clovis was roused by a surprise visitor – or wherever life-sized holograms landed on the sliding scale of trespassing.

“Hello, Clovis. Have you had your fill of desperation? Would you quite prefer acquiring the correct data, exposing the full extent of the Banking Clan's corruption in a single, easily accessible file?"

[niall-is-my-dream]

The Bucket List - Chapter Eleven

You woke the next morning, your bodies still wrapped around each other, your hands on his chest. You felt complete with him, but you knew the next ten days would be long while he was away. You could do it though, you were determined not to wallow about in self pity whilst he was gone. If the last 15 months had taught you anything then it was to be strong, focussed and to live for the day. You didn't want to scare him off by being clingy or by telling him that you knew you loved him.

You gazed up at him, listening to him breath, looking at every freckle he had, trying to memorize it for when you were apart. You don't know how long you laid like that but when he woke he smiled when he realised you'd been watching him sleep. 

"Like what you see?" He said kissing you. 

"Mmmm I do, you look cute when you sleep." You replied.

You looked over at the clock 9:35am. 

"Fancy some breakfast babe?" You asked. 

"Mmmmm breakfast sounds good." He said as he pulled at the covers and brought his body to hover over yours. He leaned down and kissed you softly, moving his tongue to part your lips wanting the kiss to be deeper.

"That wasn't what I meant Niall!" You replied chuckling as his lips trailed down your neck leaving kisses along your jaw. 

"We have to leave in like an hour, and we haven't eaten or got dressed. You don't even have your golf stuff sorted!"

He let out a sigh knowing you were right. You couldn't believe you'd turned down sex with Niall, but you didn't fancy explaining to your Pops about why you were late picking him and your Mam up!

"When we get back later after lunch you can do whatever you like with me." You whispered in his ear.

"Oh god that will be all I'll be thinking about now for the rest of the day!" He said laughing.

You laughed to as you kissed him again deep and hard desperately trying to show him how much you wanted him. You pulled away from the kiss gasping, your hands laying on his chest as he still hovered over you staring into your eyes.

"Come on big boy lets go make toast." You said, easing yourself from under him and getting out of bed. You walked over to your drawer getting out some knickers and a top. Niall got out of bed to put on some boxers, you snuck a cheeky look at his peachy bum and smiled.

You made the coffee and toast and sat down at the dining table together. Niall was strangely quiet. 

"You ok babe?" You asked.

"Yeah, just going to miss this." He said looking at you.

"It's only ten days and you'll be so busy and having a great time to worry about me!" You said trying to soothe him.

Just then Niall's phone bleeped. He looked at the message and sighed.

"A Newspaper has contacted management about us, obviously got a good picture of us both last night." He said. "They are not going to comment, leave it up to me in interviews to confirm it if I'm asked. That ok with you or shall I say we are friends?"

"Baby, I'm not offended if you want to say we are just friends and that you were holding my hand to protect me from the photographers in case I fell or something. You don't have to say anything in interviews about us. I won't be upset." You said leaning over and taking his hand in yours.

"If I get asked I don't want to lie about you, I don't want you to be a secret unless you'd prefer I didn't say anything?" He asked.

"This is your career Niall and if you'd prefer I was kept out of it I really don't mind but if you want to tell people we are seeing each other then that's ok with me to. I don't want you to feel any pressure. I don't want to ruin this. I'm having way too much fun!" You said smiling.

"Annie, I've never felt like this before about anyone, I'm actually questioning myself as to whether I've ever been in love before. This has been such a crazy couple of weeks."

Fuck did he say love?! Don't say anything about love to him, you'll freak him out you said to yourself.

"I feel the same. Look, if you get asked in an interview then tell them what you think is best, you'll know at the time what that is."

He smiled at you. "You're perfect you know that?"

"I try." You say smiling back and laughing. "Come on lets gets showered and dressed." You gathered up the plates and loaded them into the dishwasher. 

"Shower together?"

"Yeah, but no funny business! No time!"

"Ok, but later you are so getting it!" He said smirking.

You pulled up at your Mam and Pops house just before 11, you both jumped out of the car and walked towards the back gate. You opened it and walked down the passage way to the kitchen door. 

"Mam! Pops!" You called out as you entered their house.

"Hey baby girl!" Your Mam said in her strong Irish accent as she walked in the kitchen, walking over to you and kissing your cheek. "Niall's joining us if that's ok?" You asked.

"Of course sweetheart! Nice to see you again." She said giving him a kiss to.

"Pops is just finishing a phone call, he won't be a minute. How are you both then?" She asked smiling.

"Good thanks, you had a good couple of days Mam?" You asked back.

"Not too bad, went shopping with Sarah from next door yesterday and had lunch out, it was ok but she's always gloating about her kids so I obviously boasted about you and Michael! Silly woman she can't compete with my kids!" She said laughing. "You know her son cheated on that nice wife of his! Dirty boy! And with his secretary, oh the irony!" 

"Jesus feckin Christ Mam, how did you find that out? Did she blurt it out over lunch?!"

"No Mandy and Len were in the pub over the weekend and told me so when she started gloating about how great her son is and how successful he was I told her about how fabulous Michael and Claire were and how amazing the wedding was. And how my girl had got herself a lovely my boy to. Didn't mention your name my darling boy as I didn't think you'd appreciate that." She said gesturing to Niall. "I like hearing the gossip, but I don't let on I know or spread it, don't you worry. Part of being a pub landlady." She said. "You have to be discreet!"

"Mam, you just told us the gossip that's hardly discreet!" You said as both you and Niall laughed.

"Well you're my family, you're not going to spread it around are you?!"

"Oh dear God woman you're not gossiping again are you?" Your Pops said as he strolled into the kitchen. 

"Baby girl." He said as he gave you a hug. "Niall son how are you?" He asked holding out his hand. 

"Good thanks." Niall replied shaking his hand "Tagging along today if that's ok?"

"Of course." Said Pops. "Come on lets get going before she spills anymore gossip!"

The drive to the golf club was only 30 minutes outside of the city and you drove while your Mam sat in the front, at Niall's insistence. He was totally sucking up to them and it was sweet although you were worried your Pops might ask him the boyfriend/father awkward questions but he didn't. They talked about Niall's travels and about golf. 

You pulled up to the club and parked before all climbing out and grabbing your clubs, your Mam had her knitting with her like she always did. You walked up to the desk and confirmed your booking before heading out to the driving range area, your mum making herself comfy on one of the seats behind your Pop's. Once you'd collected your balls you were ready to go and now you were nervous.

"Go on then Annie! Show us what you got!" Said Niall.

"I'm nervous you're watching me! Stop staring!"

You heard your Pops laugh next to you.

You pulled out your driver and positioned yourself taking a long hard swing. It went perfectly straight exactly where you wanted, your arms had stayed in position well.

"Ooohhh very nice!" Niall said.

"Come on then Mr Golf Management Company your turn!" You said.

He smirked as he took his swing and hit it perfectly to.

"Ooohhh very nice!" You mimicked.

You each carried on taking your shots in your own area, chatting and laughing as you went before Niall headed off to the loo.

"Hi Annie! How are you?" It was David one of the private golf tutors who you knew from the club.

"Hi David, I'm good thanks, how have you been?"

"Great, been busy up here the last few weeks, haven't seen you for ages."

"Well Pops and I have been a few times. Must have been on your days off."

Just then Niall joined you placing his hand on the small of your back.

"Hey you." You said "This is David a tutor here."

"Hi." He said. "I'm Niall, Annie's boyfriend." Stretching his hand out, David shaking it in return.

"Hi, nice to meet you." He said looking shocked, clearly knowing who he was considering how involved Niall was within golf. He counted Rory McIIroy and Justin Rose as friends.

"Right I best get on." He said. "See you soon Annie and nice to meet you Niall."

"You to." Niall said.

As David walked away you turned to Niall. "You're so funny when you're jealous!" You said.

"Not jealous, just making him aware you had a boyfriend!" He said smirking.

"I liked that you called yourself that to him." You said in a whisper so that your Pops couldn't hear. 

"Well you said I'd know what to say and what felt best at the time and that did." He said smiling. 

Niall was amazing at golf, you were watching him closely as he took his shots. His drive was incredibly. He chatted with your Pops easily and you knew he had charmed your Mam especially over lunch.

You dropped your Mam and Pops home and made your way back to yours. Niall moving into the front with you and placing his hand on your thigh. You felt such a rush at his touch. Apart from him placing his hand on your back when you were talking to David he'd not touched you at all, probably because you'd been with your Mam and Pops. Right now you couldn't wait to get home and get him naked for some afternoon play time.

Chapter Twelve

https://niall-is-my-dream.tumblr.com/post/168218489873/the-bucket-list-chapter-twelve

[sinsiriuslyemo]

Good afternoon guys!! I have a new chapter of Making an Agent for you!! Would any of you like to be tagged since I’m not posting this every day? Please let me know in the comments! Will Rafael and Charlie be able to get past what happened?

Chapter Fourteen: The Morning After

The next morning, Rafael got down to the gym for more training with Cole, Charlie and what had happened between them last night still playing over and over in his mind. What was most frustrating was that he couldn’t understand why she’d decided to cross the boundaries she herself had set forward and yet act as though it were no big deal. Had he not made it clear enough that he was interested in more than just sex? Was sex the only thing she’d been trying to avoid by rejecting his attempt to kiss her? Refusing to call him by his first name?

His instincts told him no, that the connection and chemistry he’d felt between them was real, and that she’d felt it just as much as he did. Had she been afraid of those feelings, so similar to those of which he imagined she’d felt for her old partner? Albeit not nearly as deep; they hadn’t know each other long enough or gotten to know each other well enough for it to be love. Still, it was more than merely sex. It had to be.

But then why would she initiate a physical relationship in the first place? If she was so afraid of getting closer to him emotionally, why would she do so physically?

The only logical conclusion that his anger had concocted was that she was merely lonely, and knowing he was lonely too, she saw fit to take advantage of that. This infuriated him.

He’d never hit Cole so hard during their combat training, that much he knew. It wasn’t until he delivered a hard jab with his left hand, and heard Cole growl at him to stop that he realized just how much what had happened last night bothered him.

“What the fuck?!” Cole was holding his nose, and Rafael could see the copper dripping from behind his palm.

“Oh God, Cole, I’m so sorry,” he said, immediately going for a towel and handing it to his trainer. “Is it broken?” he asked tentatively.

“No, if it were broken, I’d have broken your hand,” Cole answered with a smirk, wiping the blood from under his nose. “I could tell you were angry, tried to get you to stop, but you were someplace else. What’s going on with you?”

Rafael sighed, shaking his head as he fixed his eyes on Bobby on the far side of the gym, lifting weights.

“Nothing, I just um…” He shook his head again, swallowing the pain and the anger he was feeling. “Just had a rough night, that’s all. I really am sorry--”

“I’m okay,” Cole insisted, waving the other man off gently. “But you gotta focus while you’re fighting,” he added, earning a nod from the other man.

“I know, I’m sorry,” Rafael sighed.

“You wanna talk about it?”

“Not really,” Rafael mumbled.

He’d never really been one to express emotions, a habit from needing to be the tough, quick-witted ADA everyone knew him as. The only person he could ever really talk to besides his mother was Olivia, and that just wasn’t an option now.

“Okay,” Cole replied, shrugging his shoulders and squaring up. “Come on, let’s go again.”

Charlie hadn't left her condo all morning, not even for her usual iced latte from the coffee bar. She wasn’t even sure she could face Rafael again after what had happened last night.

Maybe I need more therapy after all, she thought to herself, running her fingers through her hair.

Looking down at the hand that had been touching her partner, that she’d wrapped around him until he submitted to her, she frowned. Her eyes closed as she let out a huff of air. She had to apologize. In person.

But he would likely want to talk about it if she did, and that might open a floodgate of emotions that she’d kept buried for so long. She just wasn’t sure if she was ready to feel something for another person again. And yet she already felt something for Rafael.

Letting a loud groan rip through her lips from behind her clenched teeth, she stood and went into her bedroom to get dressed, opting for a pair of jeans and a tank top. She looked at the clock and realized that Rafael would likely be coming back from his training session with Cole, and with a deep breath she opened the door to her condo, and left.

About a quarter of the way to the gym, she decided to go down to the coffee bar for her latte after all, and decided to grab him a coffee as well. A peace offering. She made a face at the thought, stirring one cream and two sugars into his coffee, the way she knew he preferred it before she headed down towards the gym.

When she arrived, she could see Bobby on one of the treadmills, but no Rafael, no Cole either.

“Bobby baby!” she called out, smiling when he rolled his eyes a little and hopped off the machine.

“If you’re looking for your partner, he left already,” Bobby said, wiping the sweat from his brow. “He looked pretty angry if you ask me.”

“I wasn’t asking you,” she answered softly, a faint smile still on her face. “You wouldn’t happen to know where he went, do you?”

“I assumed he went to find you,” Bobby replied, bobbing his shoulders.

Sighing heavily, Charlie smiled and thanked him before trekking back up towards their quarters, figuring maybe he’d gone home for a shower. One thing she had a feeling about was that he definitely hadn’t gone to find her.

Had he?

Rafael knocked on Charlie’s door repeatedly; he was still angry, and truth be told, felt as though she should be the one trying to seek him out, but far be it from him to not want to forgive her for last night. It was becoming more and more difficult to justify when she wouldn’t even come to the door.

Had she really regretted it that much? Or was she simply not home?

He hoped for the latter. It seemed the more he thought about how angry he was, the more he wanted to rewind the clock so that he’d never opened that email two years ago. He never would've met Charlie, never would've been ripped from his life...but then he would still be alone.

Isn’t that what he was now? Alone? And in the only place he was meant to feel safe?

He was about to give up and go into his own condo when he heard the elevator ding, and he turned his head towards the sound hopefully just as Charlie stepped off. She had her head down, was watching her steps as she approached him, and when she looked up to see him, she froze.

She stared at him, cups of coffee in her hands as she took the last few steps to reach her front door.

“Hi,” she said gently.

At first he didn’t answer, trying to ignore the nagging voice in his head telling him how beautiful she looked.

“Hi,” he whispered.

The corner of her mouth quirked upward slightly as she looked him over, noticing a little blood on his knuckles.

“Cole really worked you over today, huh?” she asked, gesturing to her discovery.

He followed her gaze, smirking a bit as he shook his head.

“Actually, I gave Cole a bloody nose,” he answered softly before he looked back up at her, the smirk long gone. “We really need to talk.”

She nodded her head knowingly, swallowing her nerves and holding up the coffee she’d procured for him.

“One cream, two sugars?” she offered.

Nodding his head, he took a measured step forward to claim his gift.

“If you think this makes everything alright--”

“I know it doesn’t,” she replied, nodding to emphasize her understanding. “But it’s a start right?”

“Let’s talk,” he said after a moment, inviting her to come in as he opened the door to his condo.

“Okay,” she whispered, taking a deep breath and following him inside.

FORMER HQ. SOMEWHERE IN UPSTATE NEW YORK. TWO YEARS AGO, 9:15 PM

Brainey played with his yo-yo as he watched the monitors in the security room, Cole beside him, cleaning his gun. A bleep appeared on one of the monitors and both men looked up from their respective tasks.

“Coyote?” Brainey suggested absently, immediately running a system diagnostic when the object on the security grid disappeared as quickly as it had shown up.

“Maybe…” Cole mumbled wearily. Something wasn’t right; not that coyotes weren’t common in the area, but they typically didn’t abruptly vanish from the security grid like that.

“You don't sound convinced,” Brainey observed. “Diagnostic came back clear...are your spidey senses tingling?”

“A little. It’s probably Riff Raf or the Emcee lurking around, but it doesn’t hurt to be on the safe side and dump the security files to the off site back-up facility. Just in case,” Cole answered. With Malcolm Gershon in the wind, even the most minute glitch in their security had him on edge. There was no harm in being overly cautious.

“Let’s talk,” Jake said, coming over to her with a few samples of wedding invitations. “I know you were really keen on song-grams for invitations, which I agree is hilarious--”

“Not only hilarious, but original,” she added with a grin.

“Very original, but I would expect nothing less from you. I just think--”

A loud boom in the distance broke his thoughts, and he and Charlie both looked towards the sound, thoughts of wedding plans forgotten. Just as he was about to investigate the interruption, the emergency alarm rang out over the compound.

“Intruder?” Charlie inquired as she went for her gun, and moved in a crouched position towards the window.

“I don’t know, but that definitely sounded like an E-bomb,” he answered.

Bobby came up for air from beneath the covers, his latest conquest gasping at the sound of the explosion.

“What was that?” she asked in a whisper, propping herself up onto her elbows as he moved to sit up beside her.

“I’m not sure,” he replied. “Sounded like an explosion, though I was aiming for a different kind of explosion,” he muttered, adjusting himself to tuck his erection inside his boxers as he got up from between his lover’s legs and went to the window.

“I’m gonna get Trish,” Cole said, getting up just as the blip reappeared on the screen, this time with friends that were closing in on all sides of the compound. “Shit,” he spat, moving quickly to sound the alarm as he rushed towards Trish’s quarters.

Brainey froze as the alarm sounded overhead, his fingers furiously tapping at the keyboard, trying to get in contact with the RAUL station in Key West with very little luck. The communications had been compromised.

“This is my literal nightmare,” he hissed to himself as another explosion rocked the main building, knocking out the power generator. “Oh fuck my life, sideways, with a flag pole,” he groaned, activating the emergency backup generator as he continued to send a distress signal to the Key West station.

“What’s going on?” Trish asked as she came charging into the security room, Cole on her heels.

“It’s a perimeter breach. Comm systems are down, they’re coming from all sides,” Brainey answered urgently. “I can’t get in touch with JT in Key West.”

“Keep trying,” she replied before turning to Cole. “We need to get into the armory before they do.”

Charlie followed Jake to the shattered sliding glass door of their condo, both of them crouched low as he peaked outside.

“What do you see?” she stage whispered, unsure as to how many intruders there were or even where they were.

“Flashes,” he answered, ducking back around the corner and taking the safety off his weapon, she followed suit. “I think there’s a fire in the main building, and a lot of gunfire. You good?” he asked, looking back to her as she pulled her sneakers on, earning a nod. Kissing her lips firmly, they both made their way out into the chaos.

[imsfire2]

The wedding

[My May the Fourth story for the lovely @hanorganaas]

[The prompt was “Jyn and Cassian’s wedding night”; I got a bit carried away with it and did the whole wedding]

“On Perralt they drink salt water at a wedding,” Bodhi says.  Cassian looks up from his data pad and wrinkles his brow in distaste.

“Drinking salt water causes insanity and hallucinations in humans.”  K-2 sounds intrigued. “Perhaps it’s symbolic.”

“It says here it’s supposed to make the bride and groom thirst for one another forevermore.”  

Cassian turns to look across the cabin at Jyn as she moves about in the aft section, bending and stretching as she checks on the stowed shipment.  As if cued by his silence, Jyn glances round and meets his gaze.  

Her eyes go dream-swept for a moment and her lips curve. “That’s hardly a problem we need worry about.”

Cassian grins appreciatively.  “Also we’re not planning a Perralti ceremony.”  He shakes himself, imagining her skin against his own; goes back to the report he’s been writing for the last half hour.  Scratches his beard and scribes another few lines before glancing up at Bodhi. ”Isn’t it Perralt where the best man and the bride’s attendant also have to marry?”

“No,” Bodhi says “That’s on Hroshor.  And it’s only if the bride and groom both pass away before the wedding.”

“No plans for that,” Jyn says dryly.

“And I have no plans for marrying anyone,” K adds.  “Even if it were legal.  Which it is not.”  He releases the connection catch on the gun he is cleaning and takes the sections apart carefully.

“Ah – ah, but –“ Bodhi scrolls through about ten back screens, searching – “on Eb’Isa it is.  Here it is: ‘Eb’Isan droids, and off-world droids resident on Eb’Isa more than eight planetary months, may contract a marriage with other droids or organics, and may also act as proxy spouses in the event of –‘ - oh, this is fascinating! I wonder why that arose…”  He reads on, silently, absorbed again in the encyclopaedia.

Cassian chuckles. “Well, there you have it, K.  If you ever lose the heart of your circuits to a shiny astromech, you know where to go.”

“That is unlikely. Astromechs are very seldom shiny. And I have never understood why people consider them cute.”

“People like it when someone small and insignificant-looking is feisty and outspoken and brave beyond their size.  It is cute. Especially if they bleep.  You know, this is why I love Jyn.”

“I’ll make you bleep if you’re not careful,” his fiancée tells him, coming back into the main cabin.  “Come on, Bodhi, surely you’ve read enough wedding customs by now?”

Bodhi shakes his head. “Barely started, I’m afraid.  It’s a big old galaxy out there.”  He grins up at them.  “There’s got to be a perfect tradition somewhere for the two of you. Just let me keep researching, something’ll come up.”

Cassian asks “Did you go to any weddings when you were a child?”

She shakes her head. “I don’t think my parents knew anyone well enough on Coruscant.  And we were on Lah’mu less than a year.  I’m sure there was a certain amount of sleeping around among the partisans but Saw frowned upon anyone forming close attachments.  Said it was a sign of weakness.”

Her face has gone quiet. He reaches across to her, strokes her arm.  Shifts along on the bench, inviting her to take the empty space beside him.  “If it’s weakness, then we’re weak together.”

Jyn’s smile is small and closed-lipped as she sits down, but her eyes meet his with warmth, and stay. He falls into their sea-green beauty. For a moment the only sound is the throb of his pulse; that and the click and tap of K’s durasteel fingers working on the blaster.

“What are Festi weddings like?” Jyn asks.  “I know you’ve never been back.  But that’s where you got the idea of paired rings, isn’t it?”

He knows she wants a quiet wedding; practically the first thing she said when they discussed it was “simple, no fuss”.  He’s thought about this but in the end it had seemed easier to avoid mentioning the other traditions of his home; he simply can’t picture the fireworks and drinking contests being what she has in mind.  And the shouting, and the dancing; and the brilliant colours, all that red and yellow and violet blue.  She’s put him on the spot now, and he tries to prevaricate. “They’re pretty loud and messy, not really what we’d been planning.”  Jyn looks worried for a moment, and he offers the one thing that doesn’t make marrying on Fest sound like mayhem.  “I remember there were always flowers.  But flowers aren’t easy to get hold of, and it’s not important. All that matters is that we’re together and we’re with our friends.”  

She squeezes his hand.

K-2 locks the gun barrel back together.  “All done, ready for use!”

**

Standing at the front of the small chamber of ceremonies, waiting and waiting like this, is weirdly terrifying. He’s been in so many situations where torture or even death were imminent, and it shocks him to realise this feels worse.  It should be the happiest moment of his life but he has never been so nervous.  

At some point K has become as attached to the concept of “wedding traditions” as Bodhi, and is now refusing to allow him to look round at the guests as they come in, in case of incurring something he refers to, with completely deadpan solemnity, as “bad luck”.  Cassian can hear the doors hissing open and shut, the sound of footsteps and murmuring voices.  But with the exception of the two beings in front of him and the droid at his side, he cannot see anyone.

The celebrant and co-celebrant are both, in their different ways, pretty impressive.  Admiral Ackbar has turned out in full ceremonial dress uniform, snow-white and gold, with huge padded sleeves and massive pleated ruffles that mount up his back like fins.  General Draven looks as though he’s been ironed to within an inch of his life; and he’s smiling, which is downright intimidating.

K-2 chatters.  If he didn’t know better he would think his best man was nervous too.  But it’s probably meant to be reassuring.  

Cassian picks at the starched cuff of his jacket.  This is all taking so long…

“Good luck, Cassian,” says K; and reaches out to turn him gently round.

There’s music playing; bright, joyful music with woodwind and brass and a march rhythm.  It helps him to smile as his best man repositions him; as he wonders whether he really would have been incapable of turning unaided (his legs feel strange enough that it’s not impossible); as he sees Jyn approaching, down the centre aisle between the ranks of guests, with Bodhi at her back grinning like a kid.

Like him, she’s wearing uniform.  The formal grey-green jacket and snug pants fit her figure closely.  Like him she has a line of small medals and ribbons on her chest; fewer than his, but just as well-polished.  Like him, she has a smile that is 20% nerves and 80% sudden incredulous happiness.

Unlike him, she’s wearing flowers.

Her dark hair is brushed and parted but where normally it would be bound into a bun with a plain tie, today it hangs over her shoulders and down her back in loose chestnut brown waves.  Wrapped over her head, holding the swept-back locks away from her face, is a broad, piled up band of crimson and gold and violet-blue flowers.

Bodhi is wearing one, too, and carrying what looks like a third.  The brilliant colours of a traditional Festi wedding crown.  As they reach the front of the aisle he passes it to Jyn and she reaches up to place it on Cassian’s head.

Her lip quivers, and he has a struggle not to cry.  He’s biting his own lip as they turn, hand in hand at last, to face the Admiral.

“Friends and comrades, welcome to this happy gathering…”

**

The ceremony itself is short and simple.  Elements of it will stay in Cassian’s memory forever.  Discovering that his flowers must have been kept in water till the very last minute, as a hundred icy-cold drips sink into his hair.  Jyn’s expression when K-2 produces the rings from his thoracic storage slot.  Admiral Ackbar’s improvised flourishes of poetic language, and the astonishing realisation at one moment that Draven is trying not to laugh at a particularly choice phrase.

Signing the register and seeing Jyn sign her name beside his.  She writes “Jyn Andor”, without hesitation.  One would almost think she had been practising.

The realisation, as the wedding party comes into the main canteen to eat afterwards, that the reason rations have seemed unusually dull of late has been because the cooks were preparing baked goods and saving up fresh ingredients for today.

K-2’s speech, spectacular even by his standards.

Chirrut and Baze dancing. The Twi’leks dancing.  The sword dances, the candle dances…

The extraordinary amounts of alcohol, from high quality wines to the rawest hooch, that people have brought.

Bodhi, drunk.  Luke Skywalker drunk.  Leia Organa Solo, quietly tipsy, admitting it was she who three years ago set up the SkyPilot Kiss Sweepstake that has run so successfully since, and raised so much credit for the Alderaan refugee relief fund.  Her husband laughing so much he falls off his seat.

Chewbacca and the diminutive Takodanan pirate singing duets, very drunk indeed.

The fireworks.

**

In lieu of the honeymoon they won’t be able to begin till it’s operationally feasible, they’ve been assigned an unoccupied suite in Command quarters for their wedding night. It’s huge, easily four times the size of their room in officers’ quarters.  A bed made up in crisp, ironed sheets and soft quilts, a ‘fresher so big there’d be room to dance in the shower; even a tiny personal kitchen unit.

“Look, Jyn, I can cook for you!”

“Cassian, I’m stuffed. All that fruit cake.  All that cheese!”

“You didn’t have to eat all the cheese.”

“Oh, I did…”

“Okay, maybe you did. Mrs Andor.”

Jyn strolls into the refresher and he hears the taps running at the basin.  After a moment she calls “I’m putting my flowers in water – do you want to put yours in, too?”

He follows her and leans on the doorframe, watching.

One of the dahlias in her crown has begun to collapse, and when she lifts it away from her head it leaves a scattering of hot gold petals in her hair.  She settles the crown carefully on the surface of the water, stems immersed and flowers floating.

“Did Bodhi get the flowers right?” she asks.  “He was worried they’d be the wrong kind, or the wrong colours…”

“They’re beautiful. He found the right colours, just perfect, the traditional ones.  Flowers – flowers were such a huge luxury on Fest, because of the cold.  So we only wore them for really special occasions, to show how highly we honour someone or how much we love them.  I still can’t believe how stunning you looked when I turned round.  It was like a dream.”  He takes off his own crown and examines it thoughtfully. “You’re supposed to press one bloom from each of them in a big book and keep them forever.  But we don’t have any paper books.”

“We could freeze them?” Jyn suggests.  “Or preserve them in liquid nitro?”

“Let’s think about that tomorrow, shall we?”

He lowers the circlet of crimson and gold and blue into the water beside hers.

There’s a mirror above the basin.  Cassian slides his arms round her and pulls her close, her back warm against his chest, and they stand looking at their reflections above the basin full of colour.

“Captain and Mrs Andor,” Jyn says. “Well, well…”

“So, Mrs Andor…” He nuzzles under her ear and kisses her. “Do you want to have a shower – or a bath, look - when did you last see an actual bath tub? – or do you want to consummate our marriage?”

In the glass he sees Jyn’s smile slowly blossom into a wide open grin.  Even now it’s unusual to see her smile so broadly.  “Consummate,” she says.  “I like that word.  And after all, it is our wedding night.”

**

After years when being together meant the rare  bits of time they could snatch between missions, days numbered as soon as they began, exhausted nights sleeping curled against one another, it still seems strange to have leisure.  The bed looks unnervingly luxurious, and the cleanliness and spaciousness and excess of comfort all make Cassian feel oddly nervous.  

He toes off his shoes carelessly and pushes them under the console shelf.  Fiddles with his collar, unused to this formal wear with all the extra buttons.  Hears Jyn mutter a swear word, and looks up to find she too is struggling with fastenings, with her head down and slightly turned away.  This is supposed to be the most romantic moment of their lives, and here they both are, awkwardly undressing, shy of one another and of the solemnity of the night.

But this is Jyn, who he trusts more than any living being in the universe.  The heart of his heart.

He moves to her side of the bed quickly.  She’s got the jacket off now and is folding it neatly, glancing round for somewhere to put it.  The tension that has made him discard his shoes has got her suddenly tidy and anxious. She looks up startled into his face as he joins her, and he takes the jacket and tosses it on the console; raises his hands to help her with the shirt.  It strikes him as ridiculous that it should be easier to undo someone else’s clothing than one’s own.  

His hands move quickly and neatly down, slipping each button free.  As he reaches her waist she lays her own hands over his, stilling him.  He looks up, meets her eyes.

There’s heat in their sea-coloured depths that catches a fire in him, now as always.  Now and forever, he thinks, and is glad.  

They are standing very close now, almost breathing one another’s breath.  He thinks of their first time, both of them still stiff and bruised from Scarif, scars barely scabbed, hair smelling of bacta in the humid air; of the mingled perspiration, the clumsy, desperate need, overwhelming, insatiable, fulfilled at last.  Thinks of nights on the ice, clinging, trying to conserve every scrap of body heat.  He pushes the fabric of her dress uniform shirt slowly off her shoulders, first one side and then the other; slides it down her arms, those deceptively slender arms, hard with muscle.  The shirt falls behind her as she pulls its tails out of her waistband and lets it drop to the floor.  Very gently she raises one arm to embrace his neck while the other steals round his back.

She’s still gazing into his face.  He’s still burning and drowning in her eyes, he sees how her gaze flicks across his features, taking him in as she’s done so many times.  If he were bloody or beaten now, she would be noting each wound.  He remembers standing like this, light passing in broad bands, the vibration of the elevator almost too much for him to stay standing; seeing her take in how broken he was, how he shook with pain and exhaustion.  Seeing her joy break and fall in the face of his injuries, her eyes filling with loss anticipated, with the knowledge they were descending not to hope but to death, his death and very probably hers.    

The memory must be in his eyes now; Jyn moves her hand to his cheek, stroking him, her thumb brushing across his lips.  A faint crease of concern comes and goes between her brows.

He pulls her to him, as he had wanted to do that day when he’d lacked the strength to make another move unaided.  All her warmth presses against him and she raises her mouth to his.  The intensity of desire and the intensity of memory twine together through every feeling, every thought; what they have been and what they are now, inseparable.  He would not change it, because all that pain led to this now.  Will there ever be a day when Jyn’s mouth on his does not feel sacred?  He is a man born on the grey ice, and he holds fire in his arms and is bathed in it, and knows it is his life.

These lips parting on his, tender, inviting; lips he has seen split and bruised, bloodied, clenched in pain.  These hands caressing him, that he has seen gone limp in unconsciousness, or shaking, strapped in reddened bandages, cradled against her panting breast.

All of his longing still unassuaged, trembling, welcoming and begging, just as hers does.  Life, not death; hope, and the certainty of something more than a dead ending.  One another.

Hands touch, and every grazing contact is like the kiss of sunlight.  Jyn’s mouth on his is hot and wet, her tongue teasing his; he presses back joyfully and suddenly she begins to giggle.

“What?”  He breaks off from her lips, breathless, aching, alive. Begins to grin stupidly at the sight in his arms; Jyn the taciturn shield-maiden who allowed no-one to approach her; Jyn laughing, half-naked, with flower petals in her hair.

“I am so happy,” she says. Sparkling-eyed; then her smile clamps shut in disbelief for a moment at the sound of the words.  It wavers back and returns with a little doubting gasp. “So happy – I don’t know how to be so happy…”

Cassian takes her face between his hands, presses his own smile to hers.  “Querida…”

“Te quiero,” Jyn says when their lips part again; speaking very precisely and carefully, as though it is she teaching him the words.

“Te quiero, te amo,” he murmurs back.  He kisses down her neck into the hollow of her collar bone.  “Mi amor…”

“Mi amor…” Her hands are in his hair, fingertips stroking, smoothing then ruffling it again, probing in to draw the shape of his skull. “Oh, my love.”

“My love…”  Cassian slips the straps of her bra off her shoulders and pushes the soft cups down with his mouth, trailing kisses onto one breast.  A bubble of triumphant amusement escapes him as he manages to udo the back clasp one-handed. “Ah, got it first time!”

“Mi amor – how do you say ‘hurry up and finish undressing me’ in Festi?”

She has that challenge look on her face that he’s seen countless times and loves more than he knows how to say; as though she’ll fight him even in play, and trusts him never to retaliate except in the same way.  The last ghosts of past pain vanish as he starts to chuckle.   “What about me?  When do I start to get undressed?”

For answer Jyn reaches out and carefully unfastens one jacket button for him.  “Kiss me.”

He kisses her upper lip.

She shrugs off the bra and lets it fall.

“Again?” he asks.

“Yes please, Cassian. Husband.”

Another kiss, to the corner of her smiling mouth.  Another button.  Then she slides her hands inside the half-opened jacket and tugs the shirt out of his pants; works her hands inside it, strokes up his spine till she’s clasping the wings of his shoulder blades.  

The next kiss is long and hot again, till they are both breathless.

“You want to get another button for me?” Cassian pants.  “Or shall I just rip everything off now?”

She laughs, as out of breath as he, and begins systematically unfastening his jacket and then his shirt.  He throws both garments off and catches hold of her hands; draws them to his lips, kisses each fingertip in turn.  Then bends and scoops her up, and carries her to the bed, and the next embrace.

**

He wakes with the taste of salt on his lips, and Jyn’s body warm against his side.  The lamps are still burning, and he’s fallen asleep with his head pillowed on her bosom, her left hand resting in his hair.  His mouth is mere inches from a long scar, one that puckers down from the collar bone almost to her nipple.  

He remembers the day she took that blow.  So many times he has almost lost her.  So many scars like this, left behind.

Cassian raises his head, props himself on his elbows, and looks at his wife.

Her hair is down, tangled around her on the pillow, and her face is soft in sleep, all the lines and shadows eased, at rest.  She almost looks just her age; a bare twenty-six, still not much more than a girl in some societies, and no older than he was when they first knew one another. But the shuttered, broken fury he met on Yavin 4 has gone; has changed, has flowered and grown strong.  And his own shut, broken life has opened and grown with hers.  He never thought to see his thirtieth year.  Never thought to see the peace.

Scarred, sleeping Jyn beside him, the catalyst that changed the course of the war, and saved countless billions of lives, his own among them.  

They’ll build some kind of a future together; make some kind of home, find some kind of new roles, now the Alliance is beginning to wind down intelligence operations at last.  They’ll raise a child together, and face that and all the other challenges of this new life, together.

He kisses the length of the nearest scar, from the shoulder down to her breast.  Lingers for a moment at the lower end, feeling Jyn stir in her sleep and shift her weight beneath him.  The hand that had slipped from his hair comes back, feeling for him, finding him. He moves his lips slowly down, onto the nipple, and kisses and nibbles at her there; hears her voice give a happy mumble, still half asleep, feels a breath of laughter moving through her body.

“Good morning,” she murmurs.

“Good morning,” Cassian says, and goes on kissing.

He moves to the old burn at the side of her ribs; then to the knife scar just below her sternum. Corellia, Lothal.  The knife wound had been small, but deep, she’d bled quietly for hours while outside the viewports the frenzied blue of hyperspace blurred time, and Cassian swore and sweated in fear and tried to gun some tiny further margin of speed from the engines.

The next scar is the neat one on the right side of her abdomen; the mission to infiltrate a medical facility on Ennoch 3, where their cover was inadvertently improved instead of blown, by Jyn’s appendicitis.

There’s a circular pucker next to her hip bone, a direct hit from a projectile gun on Naator; and below that another long one, jagged and irregular as an earthquake fracture, scissoring round her left thigh; shrapnel that tore through her quadriceps, one of the few times he’s ever heard her scream aloud in pain.  That was another bleeder, another close call.  He kisses the scar slowly and tenderly; every inch of healed skin holding the life in, the death out.  

Jyn’s hand strokes his hair sleepily.  “Do I get to kiss all your scars next?” she asks.

“If you want to.”

“I’d like that.  There are a lot of them…”

“This is true…”

Reaching the inner edge of the shrapnel scar he nuzzles in; spreads her thighs slowly, works his way in between her legs.  Tender rose-red flesh throbs under his tongue and Jyn groans softly.

That bittersweet taste, the musk of her body, with its edge of salt seas and sweetness; her movements under him suddenly going weak and soft; it’s the fire he’s never extinguished, the turn-on he’s never come close to exhausting, feeling her trust in every helpless sound she makes, every unresisting muscle.  He pulses his tongue against her, quick and hard, licking and sucking while she shivers, shudders, moans, gasps his name. When she comes he slides a finger inside her and presses home while her walls flutter and clench in a wild grip.  He’ll never be able to get enough of this; it’s still as much a shock and a delight today as it first was five years ago, to hear and feel her coming apart, allowing herself to let go, for him.

As the pulse of her orgasm begins to slow he works his way back up her body, and she touches him, and guides him in, slowly, till he is sheathed in her wet, close heat, hanging breathless above her.   Her eyes open, the fire of oceans, melting, dissolving, and there’s no defence between them, nothing but skin on skin, heart on heart.  The weakening throbbing inside her as she comes down is almost unbearably arousing and he pushes deep and draws back, moaning into her neck “Jyn, Jyn…” unsure how long he can hold on.  Wanting never to come, and to keep coming forever, never to lose this perfect tenderness, this vulnerability; his strength safe inside hers, this miracle…

Jyn clutches onto him, quickening again, muscles pulsating and tightening.  Her hands grip his back convulsively and her voice in his ear is small and fearless and ecstatic: “I love you, I love you…”  Cassian whimpers and comes, losing everything in her embrace, the world going dark; nothing left but her arms wrapped round him, her body holding him, her heartbeat drumming against his skin.  “Yes, yes, yes…”

They sleep again, tangled together, limb upon limb and breast against breast.  This night and all the many nights to come.

[hatnews3-blog]

Ask Ausiello: Spoilers on Good Place, Riverdale, Timeless, B99, Resident, Million Little Things, Flash and More

Got a scoop request? An anonymous tip you’re dying to share? Send any/all of the above to askausiello@tvline.com

Question: Got any Riverdale scoop? What’s next for Archie? —Kerri Ausiello: When we last saw Archie in the fall finale, he was dyeing his famous red locks and making a run for the Canadian border. Executive producer Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa won’t tell us who he finds when he gets there, but “he is headed into the Canadian wilderness, for sure.” He won’t be seeing his dad Fred in the flesh anytime soon, though: It wasn’t shown on-screen, but the EP confirms that Fred did make it back into Riverdale before the quarantine came down.

Question: Any Million Little Things scoop? My friends and I are obsessed with it and hope it’s back for another season. —Montreal4 Ausiello: Remember how showrunner DJ Nash said that everyone in the group of friends has a secret they’ve kept? Look for Regina’s to come to light in Episode 14.

Question: Any scoop on what to expect when Grey’s Anatomy returns? —Al Ausiello: I will have a special holiday treat for you this coming Monday, so sit tight. In the meantime, I tried to get showrunner Krista Vernoff to share even the tiniest bit of intel about Jennifer Grey’s mysterious character and… I struck out. “I can’t [say anything],” she responded. “Because it would really ruin a twist and turn that I don’t want to ruin.” Hmm… I’m sticking with my initial prediction: She’s Jo’s mom.

Question: Anything on The Good Place? (Janet, specifically.) —Whitney Ausiello: Everyone’s favorite not-a-robot will be forever changed by having the humans materialize in Janet form, creator Michael Schur teases: “The way to really have empathy for people is to walk a mile in their shoes, and she did, like, the inverse of that. A bunch of people walked in her weird body for a decent amount of time… so that is another contributing factor to her evolution.” He adds that the season finale “has some pretty wonderful ‘compare this version of Janet to the one you saw in the pilot’ kinds of scenes.” So enjoy, Janet fans!

Question: I’m glad Dorian finally confronted Kaleb about his feeding problem on this week’s Legacies. Can I stop worrying about MG now? —Susan Ausiello: I don’t think it’s ever safe to stop worrying about MG, but as far as Kaleb goes, it sounds like Dorian’s pep talk was just the beginning. “Kaleb has a lot of really big ideas, and a lot of opinions about how things should work,” series creator Julie Plec says. “Much like in the real world when a hot-headed teenager thinks he can second guess what makes the rules the rules, he’s going to have a rude awakening pretty soon where he realizes he doesn’t know as much as he thinks he knows.”

Question: The ending of New Amsterdam‘s fall finale makes me think that Max’s cancer is progressing quicker than first assessed. Will this affect the clinical trial Dr. Sharpe has gotten him into? —Malasha Ausiello: We brought your query to showrunner David Schulner, and he said: “While we can’t reveal here what happened to Max on that dock, we will in our first episode back January 8. But, you’re right to ask if this will affect Max’s clinical trial. It most definitely will. This setback will change a lot of things in Max’s life. And Dr. Sharpe’s too. Thanks for watching and caring and writing to TVLine about the show.”

Question: Will The Flash give us any more hints about what Nora seems to be hiding? —SSH Ausiello: Now that we know there is some sort of alliance with Eobard Thawne, you should expect “a flash-forward flashback episode” that explains “how all that came to be, which will be a lot of fun,” says showrunner Todd Helbing. “You’ll slowly start to get the pieces of info that you need, but there will probably be one episode where we explain how that all happened to get her to come back [in time].”

Question: Challenge: Make me look forward to the Schitt’s Creek holiday episode more than I am already. — Belinda Ausiello: TVLine’s resident Schitthead Charlie Mason promises me that, no matter how great your expectations are, you won’t be disappointed — the special totally “sleighs.” What’s more, he issues a warning that the episode reveals a potential stumbling block to Alexis and Ted’s rekindled romance that neither she nor we anticipated.

Question: I need to know two things about Timeless: First, will #lyatt have a baby? Two, is Jessica really pregnant with Wyatt’s baby? —Miwako Ausiello: In response to your second question, star Matt Lanter says, “We address that [in the series finale, airing Dec. 20]. We’ll find out.” As for Wyatt, he’s not suspicious of Jessica and her baby news. “We’ve seen Wyatt be blinded by love throughout the last two seasons, though, and this is nothing new for him,” Lanter says. “Inherently, he’s a good person with a good heart, and I think he has a hard time accepting that people he loves or cares about … wouldn’t be good. So I think it’s easier as an audience member to look at Jessica and go, ‘Yeah, she’s lying.’ But I think Wyatt is just more blind to things.”

Question: How many time periods will we see in the Timeless finale? —Amanda Ausiello: “There are two-plus time periods, I will say that, that we have not visited before,” showrunner Arika Lisanne Mittman shares, adding that the historical time trips highlight “ethnic representations that we have not seen before [on the show]. Both of these stories are things that [are about] lesser known historical figures. You get to meet some new people that you’ve probably never heard of.”

Question: I’d love a Resident scoop on Conrad/Nic. —Holly Ausiello: I hope you enjoyed the couple’s honeymoon phase while it lasted, because the back half of Season 2 will be “nothing but obstacles” for the pair, according to executive producer Todd Harthan. “In just about every episode, there’s a new one for them to overcome… and they just start stacking up,” Harthan says, adding that the couple will be especially preoccupied with the health of Conrad’s father and Nic’s sister. “It’s going to be a ‘hold on and hope that they make it’ kind of ride,” he teases.

Question: Any hints on how to solve the Blindspot episode title puzzle for Season 4? —Hannah Ausiello: “Oh man! We finally built a title puzzle this season that is legit very hard to crack,” showrunner Martin Gero answers. “I will say this: The puzzle is an homage to some our favorite TV series and how they title the shows. Figure out which, and you might be a step closer.”

Question: Creek’s death on Midnight, Texas was so awful. Please promise me no one dies in tonight’s episode! —Rina Ausiello: I cannot make that promise. But I can tell you that Mr. Snuggly makes it through OK. So that’s something… right?

Question: Got any red-hot Chicago Fire scoopage, Aus? —Gene Ausiello: I see what you did there and I’m… very amused. Well done. The NBC drama is planning some girls-only bonding time for Sylvie, Stella and Emily. “They’re going to go on a road trip to [Sylvie] Brett’s hometown,” showrunner Derek Haas previews. The episode will air the week of Valentine’s Day, “so we’re calling it the Galentine’s trip.” Before that, though, the show will explore Emily’s “attitudes towards dating, which are different than Brett’s, and I don’t mean LGBTQ,” Haas explains. “I mean more of what [Emily, who is bisexual] considers casual versus what Brett considers casual. All of those dynamics are going to be deepened.”

Question: March is far away. I want American Gods scoop now! —Rob Ausiello: Well, because you asked so nicely… Pablo Schrieber says the “antagonist and ally” relationship between Mad Sweeney and Laura Moon will be tested big time by his allegiance to Mr. Wednesday when the Starz drama returns for Season 2. The leprechaun’s destiny “is tied to [Wednesday], no matter what, but it’s also very thoroughly tied to her,” the actor says. “So Sweeney is walking the line, balancing what he owes Wednesday and what he’s realizing he feels in other places.” Hmm. Sounds a lot like we’ll see Laura kissing the Blarney Stone before the season’s over, am I right?

Question: Can you give us any Outlander spoilers? (Especially involving Brianna’s and Jamie’s meeting!?!) This is my first time doing this — hope I’m doing it correctly! —Carolina Ausiello: You did OK. I’ll send you some notes about how to refine your approach in a separate email. Regarding the question at hand, I turn it over to our resident sassenach, Kim Roots, who has seen the scene in question: “I have rather high standards for the huge moments on this show — the wedding night, the print shop reunion, etc. — and I was incredibly satisfied by how the father-daughter plays out in [episode number redacted according to Starz’s spoiler restrictions]. Fans of the book definitely won’t be disappointed.”

Question: Elizabeth and Henry on Madam Secretary are #couplegoals. Please tell me anything you can. —Mary Ausiello: An upcoming episode opens with the McCords taking a tango lesson. And one of them is significantly more skilled than the other.

This AAnd That… ♦ THE BLACKLIST: As teased in the Season 6 trailer, Red will spend some time behind bars after being double-crossed by a close confidant — but don’t count him out just yet. “He’s really been stripped of his superpowers,” series creator Jon Bokenkamp shares. “He’s disconnected from his resources, he may have friends who will fall away and he’s sort of on his heels, which is new for us.” But Bokenkamp assures fans that “if anyone could embrace the solitude of a cell and the experience of incarceration with open arms, it would be Raymond Reddington. We have really high stakes, but we also have some of the most fun we’ve had, as well.” ♦ BROOKLYN NINE-NINE: There will be one major.hilarious change when the sitcom makes the leap from Fox to NBC in January. “We’re allowed to bleep and blur [now],” series co-creator Dan Goor recently told us. “Fox had a no bleeping and no pixelation policy.” Now the gloves are off. “Some filthy, filthy things have been said,” added Terry Crews. “I had one [joke] where I’m ashamed. I’m actually very, very ashamed. It was so jarring that everyone was like, ‘Whoa,’ and we needed to regroup… But holy cow, we never heard language like that on the show.” ♦ CHICAGO PD: Burgess is not the only one who will have a reaction to Upton and Ruzek’s romance. In an upcoming episode, Jay “responds in a way I think you’d expect Halstead to respond,” showrunner Rick Eid teases, “and I think what’s going on in his head is a little different than what he says.” Eid also adds that Jay’s “relationship [with] Upton is interesting and evolving, so don’t sleep on that.” ♦ HOUSEKEEPING NOTE: This is the last AA of ’18 so happy holidays and all that jazz!

That’s a wrap! Please send questions, comments and anonymous tips to askausiello@tvline.com. (Additional reporting by Kim Roots, Andy Swift, Dave Nemetz, Vlada Gelman and Diane Gordon)

Source: https://tvline.com/2018/12/14/million-little-things-spoilers-season-1-episode-14-regina-secret/

[dinoalexander]

Your Moment of Zen: The Goirmet Academy’s Semi-Quotable 2018 Quotedown Quotetacular PART 2

PART 2 of the Quote Wall. Thanks, Tumblr.

—

“I’m the broadcasting geek, but YOU fangirl out!” -C

“I want this fucking song to be over right now, my ears are bleeding!” -Q on... well, any Beyoncé song really, but in particular, “Crazy in Love”

“... have you seen my granddaughter? She has my breasts.” -Christina, channeling her nana

“My first ex sells houses. My second ex sells bullshit.” -Jordan

“Someone, anyone! Please help. Jordan is very sick and has forgotten who he is. Someone hurry!!!!” -She Who Shall Not Be Named, after Jordan’s why should I watch hockey rant

“Well maybe you should stop thinking of shit. You know what happens when you think of shit? You have shitty thoughts. And shitty thoughts become shitty ideas!” -C

“I saw a woman fall asleep standing in line for security at the airport. She gets me.” -Rebecca

“Why buy it for $30 when you can make it yourself with $72 in craft supplies?” -Austin

“Do I sound like a witch when I laugh?” -Q

“You sound like a combination of a witch and Betty Rubble.” -C

(She really does!)

“Look at that penis!” -Nick

Jay: Arizona and New Orleans are getting the Super Bowl.

C: In other news, the sky is blue, water is wet, and the Bears still suck.

Christina: “I would propose marriage to my bed right now if I could.”

Kim: “Best lay you'll ever have.”

“Having an emergency at the Nerd Castle because it’s rainy and gloomy and both of the space coffee machines are down... Jesus take the wheel.” -Shannon

“Why are you always calling me during trivia? Stop that shit and text me!” -Michael

“I would like to announce I have just been named the #Gamecocks’ special teams coach. The next person who drops a ball will be forced to play quiz bowl.” -Ben

“I need to make myself a 'Gordon is a Fucking Idiot' card the next time I know I'm going to be doing something royally stupid by getting involved in something I should never get myself involved in, but decide to do it anyways.” -Gordon, a fucking idiot

“I feel like I’ve been denied critical need-to-know information.” -Erskine

“HOW DOES A TEACHER HATE THE READERS?” -... She Who Shall Not Be Named obviously meant the Raiders

“When you get back to whatever steaming underworld shithole you came from, you tell them there are still Belmonts up here!” -Trevor Belmont (Richard Armitage), “Castlevania”

“Giddy Friday noises yay!” -Dahlia

“I told you not to date the woman with the Minnie Mouse head on.” -Gordon

“You didn’t say she was crazy, you said she was bleeping Goofy!” -Jay

“Why does your shirt smell like stripper herpes?” -Jeremy

“Balls are not penises.” -Professor O

“The residue from last night's "smokey eye" was this morning's "hooker murdered in a back alley" eye.” -Leslie

“Everyone’s awesome after two Diet Cokes.” -somebody at Heather’s work

“If Trump wanted Hillary locked up, he should have brought her into his administration.” -Dane

“We’re going in the back way.” -Joe

“Phrasing!” -Jason & C

“We’re using the service entry.” -Joe

“PHRASING!” -Jason & C

“We’re going in the back way using the service entry.” -Joe

“That’s definitely phrasing.” -Jason & C

“It’s break time, and I’ve become a basic white girl.” -Jordan

“I would like to announce that in the upcoming election for U.S. Senate I will be voting for Graham Gano's leg.” -Ben

“Dr. Oz is the Skip Bayless of the medical field.” -Greg

“Air Canada Rouge is not Air Canada Huge.” -TV’s Ryan Vickers

“LeBron James has more money than God... and he’s just GIVING IT AWAY!” -C

“The Wall, tonight at 8/7central on NBC.” -Jordan

“I sing to myself at work like I think I’m a Disney princess in real life and my poor coworkers probably want to shoot themselves. But hey, I could be a crack addict instead, so let’s take a minute to consider that.” -Christina

“To everyone who imagines that those of us amused and entertained by royal weddings must be forelock-tugging peasants. You obviously think people watch the Eurovision Song Contest for the great music.” -The Governess

“My name is Craig and I don’t know.” -Gena

“I don't mind being on the show with you me and Jason on stage. I would have a problem with me Maury and some other person on that stage. And a screaming 3 month old in the back.” -Gordon

“Met a nice lady, but she’s married.” -C

“Story of your life.” -D

“...and her wife is awesome, too.” -C

“Story of MY life!” -D

“We’re on are awesome.” -Suzy

“Fecebook is an entirely different shit show.” -Professor O

“Is...is this when we come together and form a powerful entity like Voltron? And can I request that Greg be in the groinal chamber this year? Our quote-tron doesn't clean itself down there properly.” -Klaussie

“That’s a good mantra to have, Amanda... “whatever happens, know in your heart of hearts... you’re not going to die.”” -C

[kandadiff]

Updates - Kay Snow part 1

I’m redoing yours and making it longer - 

Many of you will know Kay Snow as the leader of the famous girl group Trinity, in which her and her two cousins (Adi Snow & Bri Snow) rocked the world with there very unique sound. 

Or maybe you know her as the leader and main singer of her extremely popular (#1 worldwide) girl group The Sirens, name any of the sirens and they are all household names. Plus Kay and Adi snow videos are hilarious literally go on youtube and watch there videos it makes me laugh every time. Or do you recognize her as Harley Quinn, or Serena from the I Spit on Your Grave movie franchise or even her solo album Dark Paradise.

Anyway lets dive in, so another thing Kay is known for is her various public realtionships, first linked with Liam Payne former 1d member, actor Damien Thorne and many others. However it was her relationship with actor and producer Negan Morgan. They met on the set of the Left for Dead during season 4 and 5 when she was a recurring character as Lana, Negans love interest. And like many actors these two went from co-star to couple coming out during the after show after Lana’s death scene. 

Holy shit did this not go over so well with fans, the Left for Dead fans loved it (theyre couple was the most popular on the show), but some of Kay Snows fans gave her a lot of flack for the 20 yr age difference. A few celebrities even chimed in against it. Wendy Williams calling it “shameful, what could a little girl have in common with a man like him?”, Bri Snow agreeing calling him a “cradle-robber.” and like always Azealia banks took to twitter trying to denounce there relationship saying it was “f**king gross but I guess that someone with no talent needs a sugar daddy to pay for her. I bet she was pimped herself out to him for Fire.” (Fire being the third album of The Sirens). 

Both Negan and Kay came back at her both posting a picture with both of the sticking up the middle finger with the caption “I’m happy deal with it.” and then tweeted back at Banks, Shangela’s famous sugar daddy speech from Rupauls Drag Race and went on to co-write one of her most famous solo albums Off to the Races which describes her and Negans relationship mixed with there characters in Left for Dead. 

Anyway despite opposition from others they stayed together for quite a bit considering Hollywood romances don’t last every long. Even going to the Caribbean together for vacation soon after that he went back to Left for dead and Kay and the Sirens went on the Playing with Fire world tour, which I went to it was amazing! Loved the show for real get tickets to them you wont regret it. . But nothing gold can stay and around them being together for three years they split up. Some people specuated it was because of Kay’s friendship with footballer Maximus Valente since they were seen out shortly after at disco style club Studio 54. She addressed it later on an episode of Ellen saying “Max, didn’t cause anything. Sometimes things just don’t work out the way you plan, sometimes things happen but that doesn't mean I love Negan any less. He’ll always be apart of my life.”

And to move on from her relationship she moved out of her own house and bought a new one which is where Kitty and the Sirens wrote the singles Dirty Harry, Clint Eastwood and Pity Party. 

6 months after her breakup she was seen getting in a fight with ex-one direction member on the street in front of The To Anyone Entertainment building, during the fight Louis grabbed her and tried to drag her into into a car all while they are yelling at each other and cursing and hitting and this is all being filmed and everything - right here, the video is pretty crazy like youd think after being told to leave her alone he would- nope. So he got a restraining order on him and it turns out he had been harassing and stalking her for months previous to the fight and that day it all came to a head. She also sued but the argument was settled before it went to court. 

When asked about it during a interview with Thomas Valentine “Louis and I were good friends during the one direction days especially when Trinity was new and I was learning about the industry from someone I thought I could trust. But I was young and foolish and let him get away with a lot of things that were sort of red flags because I thought he was my friend. But he took advantage of me and my kindness and I believed in him and his empty promises. I caught on more when he couldn’t rely on Liam to hide behind and told him to (bleep) off he didn’t take it well and really started to … harass me with constant calls and visits and I thought it was over but his family  owned more then half of To Anyone Entertainment and I was supposed to act like he wasn’t doing what he was doing and sweep it under the rug as nothing and in return he was supposed to leave me alone especially in the building. He did not listen which is why a lot of the music writing and recording was not in building however Louis isn’t stupid and only did it around people he knew he could get away with it around, he rarely did it around Edward, Draven, William or Negan or Max because he was afraid of them that's why I was always around them and no matter how much I yelled at him or cursed him or even hit him he wouldn’t stop. He even had the nerve to write that song Addiction about me and I know its about me because when it came out he wrote me this like 14 page letter discussing how every lyric reflected his thoughts about me … I guess im grateful for that considering after the judge read it the restraining order was practically done by then.” Holy hell, the hate Louis received after that made him delete his all of his social media and a few assholes came after Kay saying she was making it all up but the Cat Crew backed the main Cat Girl up, including Adi Snow who called Louis out and said her story was all true. 

To bring out the new year Maximus Valente announced his relationship with Kay snow on a cute Instagram video at a beach party thrown by fellow teammate player Romeo Popov. That is where Max and Kay became the couple goals we all know them to be. Seriously they are so cute together and by the way so good together can I just say. However another scandal rocked this girl during the filming of Harley & Ivy, where Kay played Harley Quinn, a sex tape featuring Kay and Liam leaked online from someone to have claimed to been an inside source having been taken years earlier. 

A few people on twitter took to talking about it almost right away trouble maker Azealia Banks claims she was cheating on Maximus and was “a dirty bitch with an even dirtier p*ssy.” Camilla Cabelo liking the tweet and @ Liam then Bri Snow tweeting “Just waiting for this drama # GotMyPopcorn.” Liam tweeted back saying “That was filmed a long time ago, she isn’t a cheater, I am not a cheater and honestly its obvious it was a long time ago, both her and I have gotten tattoos since then and I don’t know how it was leaked but the hate is completely unnecessary. Its not a secret, we were a couple but this video is one we meant to keep private so please just respect us enough to not send us hate about it.” Finally able to get to social media Kay addresses the video in a video of her own. “Liam said it perfectly, the hate is stupid and clearly given most of my tattoos are missing and my hair is shorter and red in the video I mean really guys? I obviously never wanted it to get out and it is an incredible invasion of privacy but its out now so just be kind to Liam and I and be kind to Maximus and Liams partner.”

However the sex tape scandal faded as The Sirens announced there highly successful I Am The Best Album and following world tour and even had two remixes of the songs as a distrack of I am the best and Ddu du ddu du to those who have come for them, Kay addressing Camilla, Bri Snow and Azealia in the remixes. That amazing ass album went platinum and they deserved it. It was amazing!

During the Sirens hiatus following Makayla Arrabah’s pregnancy announcement a video that all Malyn shippers saved to look at forever came out of Maximus proposing to Kay in cute little restaurant in Greece during there vacation. Oh my god my heart hurt it was so sweet! This was a really sweet time by the way because within this year period Makayla gave birth, Adi and Edward became an official couple, the new Wonder Woman movie starring Draven came out and Katya’s solo album Diamonds came out. 

The dream couple got married in October of that year near the couples favorite holiday (Halloween)  and in Maximus’ home country of Italy in a beautiful ceremony captured by Maid of Honor Adi Snow and Best man Romeo Popov. The wedding was supposed to be private but since both the bride and the groom had star studded guest list paps actually had people trying to break in to the venue. 

For their there honeymoon (after football season) these cuties went back Greece and enjoyed there little vacations, Maximus’s Instagram is filled with pictures like this. The year following there honeymoon she was pretty free from scandal and stayed pretty out of the magazines, working closer and closer with Edward Styles actually directing the film style music videos for his Album Abyss and starring as the Demon of Fame in the music video My Darling and this was also the time Real Time with the Snows the reality show about the snow family. It mostly revolves around her mothers side of the family and the constant drama around them.

But it was on an episode, now famous for revealing Kay’s pregnancy, which Kay was staying at her moms house and when her mother and Eva were coming back from the nail salon and a 6-month pregnant Kay was with Tyler and Adi in the kitchen complaining at who was eating her Rocky Road Ice Cream. And the fans went crazy after that aired all her social media was flooded with questions about her pregnancy and a few people actually sent her more Rocky Road Ice Cream. She and Maximus confirmed they were expecting twins and didn’t want to jinx anything that's why they waited to confirm the pregnancy. 

2months later they gave birth to there twins a boy and a girl. Apollo Romeo Valente. 

And Annabel Lee Valente aka Ella. These kids are the freaking cutest! So she really took a break from performing and got into the producing aspect of things directing a lot of To Anyone’s singers videos including Edward Styles, William, Kitty and the boy group Millennium and even helped recruit new talent for the Agency. She even traveled with the kids to start a To Anyone agency in South Korea. 

During the next 2 years Kay was pretty much exempt from scandal and worked on the horror/ thriller revenge tale I Spit On Your Grave as Serena Lorelai. So okay I love kay but I held off watching it because I heard it has a lot of gore and I’m a big baby when it comes to that but I finally watched it and holy shit its amazing! Like it is just a woman taking charge after 5 men do some really fucked up stuff to her and oh my god it was so good! Like I bought it on iTunes and watch it every two months like its a great movie for real. 

However, tragedy struck my favorite people shortly after something kay described as “the worst moment that ever happened to me.” Kay was spending time with a heavily pregnant Adi and the kids in her house when the news came on. Drunk driver struck celebrities limo all being rushed to the hospital. The limo was for Edward Styles bachelor party and in it was William Tomlinson, Harry and Marcel Styles, Stephen James, Robert and Andrew Hood, Ian Payne, Maximus Valente and Billy Hargrove. All besides Andrew Hood were seriously injured. The scene around the hospital was ridiculous, so many paparazzi and fans crowded the hospital not only because of the news but also because the news caused Arianna snow to go into labor a few days early. Sadly, Edward Styles, Maximus Valente and Robert Hood passed away just a day later. I can’t begin to imagine the pain these poor people felt and no one got out of that car crash unharmed. William has a metal pins in his legs since both were broken, Stephen has a slight limp when he walks, Ian and Billy both have scars where they had to get surgery, Harry had to have surgery on his arm and Marcel’s wrist still aches when it rains. 

The three funerals were held within a couple of days of each other but all of them were so beautiful and heartbreaking, so many people came to the funeral and so many pictures were taken. You can see she just looked so sad delivering the eulogy and Ella and Apollo even ran on stage with her when she started crying. 

In the following months Adi moved in with Kay and both found inspiration in there tragedy and while Adi was writing her Album For Him Kay co-wrote the songs and directed the beautiful cinematic music videos Dark Paradise, Like You’ll never see me again (I cry every time I hear that song) and You Found Me. She said writing and counselling really helped her get back out into the public and she slowly began to preform the songs live and began to go on social media again and became the face of Kyle Couture’s X! Line. 

Then our leader headed to Asia at the request of Got7′s Jackson Wang and BTS’s RM both wanted to help write/produce the sirens newest album and they actually started one of the most successful collaborations between Korean artists with the song Oh Yeah!, Oh Nana (ft. Suga), and E.T. Like if you thought this woman was popular in asia before, this boosted her appeal out there by like 1000%. Actually Big Hit and JYP offered her a job as a producer to help create new girl groups for the company. With plenty convincing from both sides she decided to take the job with Big Hit and with RM helped create the girl group Dream. It was the closeness of the way both boys (Jackson and RM) acted with Kay during interviews, the constant inst pictures with the twins and how fondly they spoke of her, the fact that Jackson just straight up said he loved her and RM saying that she was an inspiration for the song DNA, that made many fans speculate whether kay was dating either boy and between the internet fans it actually started a sort of war between the two fandoms, shipping #Kackson or #Kayjoon. 

Fans went real stalkerish during this time practically analyzing everything about Kay and these two boys, any pictures or interview that was made about them people analyzed. Half of Kays fans (and GOT7 stans) favored Jackson from the simple fact that hes always been close to her even before she met RM. They met through former Miss A member Jia and have been good friends ever since. Plus everyone knows he’ s like amazing with kids and Ella and Apollo seem to get along with him very well. Plus this sneaky boy is always posting pictures of the five of them (including his super cute dog) with the family emoji.

The case for Namjoon was that they clearly work so well together, even building a girl group and the long nights they have to pull together and on interviews they seem to be good friends. Plus he’s crazy smart and clearly cares for her, even on BTS TV he watched Ella and Apollo a few times and its honestly adorable how cute he is with them. Plus everyone can see how respectful he is of Kay. And this boy includes her in everything, Jungkook even joked they should just get a spare room for her at the house. 

During Dreams highly successful debut stage and first mini album Kay stepped back for a moment and headed back to the States to return to Left For Dead season 9 returning as Lana. However, both Namjoon and Jackson posted them still facetiming and fans from both sides of the argument demanded or begged or pressured her to pick one but Kay stayed illusive about her relationships with the boys. The views for the Left for Dead episode where Lana came back was highly rated and a few people thought that Negan and Kay would get back together especially since the chemistry was 100% for real like I loved it, it was steamy af. She actually received an Emmy for her performance as Lana a few months later and during this time Kay was seen out more and more with her children and her left for dead costars but many people focused on her outings with Negan but what kills me is that she was never just them two in these outings all her pictures Adi or Shawn were by her. 

Unfortunately for Kay just a week before the Emmy’s in which she was nominated for best guest actress as Lana Rhodes, she suffered from an armed break-in in her Los Angela’s home. The upcoming description is from what she said in interviews and released police reports, testimonys and her 911 call.  At approximately 4:30 am, Louis Tomlinson, former One Direction member broke in through the laundry room of Kay Snow’s LA home with a gun with a silencer, while Kay, Apollo and Ella slept upstairs. Louis then got out laundry room and headed upstairs while Hades, Kay’s German Shepard Dog awoke from his sleep and presumably found Louis as he exited the laundry room, he let out a few barks that alerted Kay and was silenced when Louis shot him and dragged his body into the laundry room. Quickly cleaning up the blood with his sweatshirt when Kay walked downstairs, he hid once again in the laundry room until he heard the girl walk back upstairs. As soon as she went upstairs, Louis exited the laundry room and made his way upstairs and into Kay Snow’s room and proceeded to watch her sleep until she awoke at 6:30 where as soon as her alarm went off he hid in her closest and she went into the bathroom and as she was headed into the hallway he sprung out and grabbed her. She fought back but he threatened her with the gun if she screamed and told her to do her morning routine as normal because “this is the new normal.” 

Kay proceeded to get her children ready for school, packing Ella and Apollo’s lunch while Louis watches and “he kept staring at the kids and he folded down every picture I had around the house of Max saying he was going to replace them all and when he was taking down the portait of Max and I, I wrote the note and sent the kids off.” In both Ella and Apollo’s lunches Kay wrote notes to there teachers both saying ‘Please call 911 and send them to my house SOS -Kay S.’ “I found Hades [her dog] and I was crying while I was cleaning him up, but he was so far gone he didn’t care or notice he took away my phone and every half an hour he was putting something up his nose, he was high out of his mind and waving that gun around. He was trying to test, see if I would fight him like I did before. I couldn’t- this time I had kids to think about. It was terrifying, he was ranting and raving how we were going to get married and how I was going to change mine and my kids named to Tomlinson. Just crazy shit like that and when the cops got there finally it got worse.” There was a standoff with the cops for 9 hours, where Louis held her hostage. Media went crazy, Adi Snow cutting her world tour short when she heard what happened. Louis then announced that if they cant live happily “then we can’t live at all.” He then proceeded to cook a dinner for him and kay lacing her drink with a sedative which “He didn’t notice I saw him put whatever it was in there and as soon as he set it down in front of me I threw It in his face and ran, that’s when he started shooting his gun, so I ran as fast as could upstairs and I went into the nearest room. Ella’s. I locked the door and I heard him coming up the stairs while shooting the gun. I was trying to climb out of the window but he shot off the lock and grabbed me back in and just kept hitting me with the gun. Then he dragged me downstairs and that’s when the swat team came in.”