#we've got uhhhh
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hi
#my art#artfight#art fight#ocs#oc#we've got uhhhh#kanagi#she's another genshin oc#sóley#soley#which ever turns out more convenient#enmee#cautomorre#who is a kenopsia oc#carnalis#my beloved meaty boy#team vampire#art fight 2023#artfight2023#team vampires
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why did my dash teleport to three days ago. cool what why
#ramblings of a worm#it's my fault i use the most glitchy variant of tumblr#but in my defense it's funny#tumblr movile web sweep!#we've got uhhhh#broken tjinfs and uhhhhh#thay tag stealing glitch happened like a few months esrly to me
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how are u on gavv so far? because i need to scream about how insane it has been (and that zakuzakuchips and fuwamallow have won special places in my heart)
can't believe his mom got flavor-blasted to death. 😔 RIP.
#art#kamen rider#gavv#gavv spoilers#for another couple days at least whoops#INSANE SURE IS RIGHT HUH#man they decided to just go as hard as possible right out of the gate didn't they#four episodes in and we've already got two murdered moms#(maybe it's a good thing hajime didn't stick around after all...)#and just. straight up ending with the sad older couple being like “shoma isn't coming home is he :(”#complete with a pan over the photo of their long-dead son#oof#okay gavv calm down for like five seconds#(no it's great)#though i will say they showed SOMEONE getting crushed after being flavor-blasted#but they didn't explicitly show his mom's face so uhhhh maybe a dramatic twist coming up?#let her eat potato chips one last time...
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Whatever. go my sketches
#lemon art#toontown corporate clash#cogblr#ttcc#cogfee au#since its human versions and whatnot#then we've got uhhhh#chip revvington#chainsaw consultant ttcc#chainsaw consultant#major player#dave brubot#major player ttcc#buck ruffler#duck shuffler ttcc#duck shuffler#brubuck#issat the ship name?? hope so lol
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if 9&10 were "dont wander off", and 11&12 were "the doctor lies", 13s rule #1 is "dont question me"
"have we not had a good time together" shes pointing yaz to the rule that yaz very well knows is there: we can travel if you dont ask me any difficult questions. yaz knows this is the rule - "because you ask too many questions", "this team structure isnt flat" - but she also was the one to invite the doctor into her home so im pretty sure she also knows shes not gonna kicked out that easily. she has some leeway. which she has been using between revolution and flux, which is why the doctor reminds her of the rules
i dont think she'd kick her out though. she wouldnt. i think it's just that the more you break the rule, the more unpleasant she becomes to be around, and eventually youre gonna walk out on your own. she doesnt want you to, she'd rather you stay and dont ask questions. but if youre gonna try to ask questions anyway, i think thats whats gonna happen
and yaz must think so too. because she does back off. because she doesnt want that to happen either. and it does anyway
#dont question me/dont challenge me. questions are the sore spot but the challenge is one she says explicitly once#because you see this in how she is with other people too. dont try her patience. dont act like shes smaller. dont challenge her or Die#based on the giggle - 'i thought i was clever' 'what do i say?! because im always sooo certain' - i dont think 14 is like this#also based on the expressions of affection#hes not that......reactive. to this. specific thing#so i wonder if it runs over to 15#he seems chill. i think? he seems fairly chill. but also i think we've so far only seen him mostly in control of things#faced with the maestro temporarily not entirely in control hes Notably Less Chill#but still bigger picture. hes mostly in control of things right now i think#or uhhhh based on how eager he seems to get out of the role of doctor#hmmmmm#13 didnt want it but like. was stuck with it i think#didnt want it but nobody else was gonna do it. thats why 12 regenerated#15 comes out 14 Literally Quitting#he doesnt want it and hes decided hes not stuck with it. maybe#none of this is true btw im just saying words recreationally#like those 13 moments are super cherrypicked and i havent rewatched in forever so#dont believe me gfkjghgjh#this is based more on how i write them than what ive seen basically#anyway in terms of 14/yaz i think it takes yaz a while to figure out how to deal with 14 Not being like this#bc she got soooo practiced at handling 13. most of which was abt like not tripping this rule too much#she'd keep it up with 14 and he'd just do stuff that like breaks the rule from his side and yaz wouldnt have any idea how to deal with it#he'd show her hes chilled out a bit. about this. over and over and it'd still take her moooooonthssssssss to start relaxing#just muscle memory at this point. doesnt help that shes also like this#i wonder if 14 - in a sort of compelte reversal - wants to be told what to do and how to do and#seeks out situations where someone else knows more than him so he can sit down and say 'teach me'#i think thats what he does. about all the human stuff. hes like teach me. all of it. show me how to do this
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calling it now. the new apes trilogy is gonna have an ape/human kiss like the og movie did.
#uhhhh AUBGAJSHDAHSAKB#maybe not on the lips like taylor and zira but#like a platonic cheek kiss at least. im calling it idc#pota#planet of the apes#kingdom of the planet of the apes#look. listen. we've already got references for other og apes stuff in the caesar trilogy#the names for nova and cornelius. the spaceship easter egg in Rise. the “no!” scene#uhhh caesar is doing a statue of liberty puzzle thingy in Rise#bright eyes!!!#i know theres gotta be more. my mind is blanking rn.#does. does that one track in Dawn with the xylophones count ASDGIAUSD#i forget what the track is called. but its the one where koba and his dudes go to check out what the humans are doing? the first time aroun#i think#theres some old timey sounding instruments and xylophones that soundl like it came from the og movie#i KNOW theres more refs im just tired and havent seen War in a while#my freaking blu ray player stopped working when i was watching Dawn a month or two ago LOLLL#Dawn is still stuck in there... </3#uhhh yeah anyways#rewatched War several times after i made this post and#for references in War to the ogs. we got those cross thingies#ekhras ya ameerah
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Like class differences is always so painfully obvious to me at times...
#miranda talking shit#I know quite a bit of different people. I don't think I know anyone in “high” class where they're shitting money#But it's... Always a bit of an disconnect when talking about growing up with people that obviously had more money#I'm from an multi-generation low class family. I mean we always had enough to eat and never had to struggle to urvive in that sense#But we've always lived modest. Especially from my mom's side. And talking about growing up with similar peoples#Backgrounds is like ah yes you inherited toys and things from siblings. Didn't have expensive game consoles#But got to play them at friends house etc. Then you talk to someone who weren't in that corner and it's like#Uhhhh what you went on multiple vacations outside the country? You got expensive toys and elictrical things? Multiple? Huh? Uh...#My first and second phone were inherited from my older siblings#Hi I talked about... Child funds with Fabian and I was like oh... They invested your money so it grew nicely#Your starting amount was my final amount um...#It's a weird disconnect somehow. Can't describe it. Just like... Oh you basically got majority things you wanted as young?#I learned to not wish for much and settle... I learned to reuse items. I learned to save things to save a bit of money#I don't even think they were spoiled. There are definitely spoiled people but I do not think I know anyone like that#But it's so wild to hear... Oh your family own an vacation house by the coast? Um... We have one inland north which was#The first own land my grand grand parents saved up and bought and built an tiny cabin on um...
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holy shit. y'all you aren't gonna believe what the pals and I are working on
#warning to PLEASE give us a LOT of time on this because uhhhh this is a big project and we've never done something like this. BUT#ehehehhehehe#we are hopefully going to have a subtitled version of the 2021 stageplay eventually#i've got a pal working on translating it into a script in english for me#(please give them some time!!! japanese is their third language and we owe them our lives for this help)#then i'll take this file. edit it. timesync it. prepare it into a subtitle file. and then merge that into a video file#HOPEFULLY please don't be mad if this takes a decade or if we end up abandoning the project
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still… not neck-deep, but perhaps hip-deep in Family Time, and wondering how many of us have to start seeking an adhd diagnosis before I'm officially allowed to find it funny.
#there are serious answers here and I'M IGNORING THEM <3#this post was going to have a more coherent. like. ending but we've got the last Big Thing tomorrow#and my brain's stopped working to conserve resources#wish me luck I got through the last Thing by being sleep-deprived and lucky and this one's going to have. more people. oh god.#falderal speaks#there's a point here and it's uhhhh. I'll stop neglecting my sideblog soon? I might be slow to respond for now?#I'm staking out a nice cave (with wifi) to go hermit in when this is over? <3
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WELL. that was certainly a different way for L to die
#its fascinating to me the times where in having to cut things it requires them to create entirely new scenarios#like this whole thing of L and light's confrontation in this warehouse and L has a gun but actually his actions have all been written to#happen by rem when she wrote his name and so him shooting light is just so light can claim he killed L in self defense#and then he's forced to shoot himself. damn#definitely didnt have the same impact. but i mean. yknow. whatever lol#i'll save my thoughts for later cause it kinda plays into my thoughts on the musical over all#but anyways. now i REALLY dont know where we're going from here#so many things have gone down differently. and from the amount of time left i was kind of expecting them to change it to L being the one#to take light down. but nope they still had him die so uhhhh#guys we've got like 12 minutes left. what the fuck is this ending gonna be like#serena.txt#death note posting
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vent
#had an issue a while ago where my bf was leaving his dirty clothes in piles on the floor which is fine except when the piles#are kept in the same room as the litterbox and the cat takes that as a cue to start pissing in piles of clothes#so i told him he couldnt do it anymore he said ok and then a bit later i caught the cat right as he was abt to piss in said clothes again#and when i was like 'hey i said you cant do this it can ruin your clothes if it gets left there' and he was like 'oh yeah i know but it's#my clothes so that's a risk i just decided to take' which uhhhh No????? no in so many ways?????????#but i didnt process how wack that is at the time so i just moved on and was like 'no but for real you cant do this anymore like not#a suggestion like legit This Cannot Continur Happening bc the end of this road is that the cat learns pissing in clothes piles is#ok whenever he wants' which did actually get him to stop but that was apparently enough learning time for mr carrot#we've had a few issues with it not toooo bad but its definitely been getting steadily more frequent#anyways guess whose electric blanket got pissed in today bc he left it in a pile on the floor and taught the cat its ok to piss in those#im having trouble giving a shit about it in the ways i should#like. idc that the blanket is maybe ruined#when he bought it he said it was for both of us but its just his so like idc but what i AM feeling is mad at him#cause like. i told him not to#and i shouldn't have HAD to tell him not to‚ 'the cat is pissing in my clothes so i will make it no longer possible for that to happen'#should be a no brainer i cannot imagine going 'welp i guess if it happens it happens' ITS PISS IN YOUR CLOTHES SITTING STALE FOR#WHO KNOWS HOW LONG and now we have to be hypervigilant abt Any Fabric Ever and who knows if itll escalate even further#hes already escalated from exclusively floor fabric to pissing in MY clothes that i was keeping on a table#like. the next stop is obviously couches/beds but like once they learn something its real hard to train them not to#and im just. frustrated that this is just gonna be yet another thing i have to deal with all the time when he shouldve just#Not Decided It Was Fine For The Cat To Piss In His Clothes In The First Place Hello?????!!!#but i also feel bad bc i feel like im holding a grudge about something small but i also Cant Let It Go#usually when the thing im mad abt is something insignificant its annoying for a bit then i let go but im just like !!!!!! what the fuck!!!!#idk. whatever#its his problem now idk how to get the heating psrt separate from the blanket part so i just sprayed some urine enzyme#on it and he can figure out wtf to do with in once he gets home in like two hours#and if thats too long and the smell gets baked in. oh well i guess#he hasnt been able to smell since we got covid anyways so like. its whatever i guess he can stew in a cat piss blanket if he wants#but i also cant tell if this is just a side effect of my General Irritability over the last few months and i really am mad abt nothing#ESPECIALLY because i keep saying it doesnt really directly effect me at this point then its like ok why are you so mad abt it then
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"Nah," I said, "part one is just emotionally heavy. Physically it's really not as bad as some of the others...."
#uhhh so far we've got a taser. a cattle prod. and kicking someone when they're down all in one scene#I mean. ONLY that scene. but uhhhh#occasionally I let myself go all out#and also I need to shine a little light on the way Richard treated a certain someone for a very long time
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crazy how this has been the driest growing season we've had in years BUT now that its time to start getting the grain and 2nd hay crop in it suddenly can't stop raining :/
#farm boy tag#winter speaks#i mean not that its gonna be my problem in a few days but. sighhhh#we've only got one harvest of hay baled and stacked for the herds all winter this is uhhhh not good.#i hope we at LEAST get the grain in. because you get One (1) grain harvest and if it fucks up youre also fucked#whatever. whatever its not my problem anymore i gotta stop worrying about farm shit.
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so. um. 👉👈
hi guysies.
Ig I should just say like. Hi
I haven't been posting here as much cause. Idk. Might be depression? I keep thinking its cause I've been so busy, which also wouldn't be not untrue, but these past, like, 3 weeks I think so far? I've had some free time but I haven't cause. I dunno, then again, I haven't been doing too much in general? I gues, besides very mandatory things, hell I've even been lacking in my regular skyrim hours of playing.
That, and as said, I get super melancholic when I remember just how sad and bittersweet it is that t0h is. Actually legit over. The show and experience, that is.
Oh all that and also becuz my headphones broke! Fuck! That's like number 2 in my bare necessities for when I post, do almost anything really! It's seriously been painful this past month going without headphones holy shit. Dude I've been scratching at the bit for some relief for headphones, I NEED music legitimately. Even right now, as I'm typing this on my phone, my music is on low levels.
But yerp. Its been. Rough. Really rough. I really do appreciate yall, everyone of yall. Have a sweet week everyone, ✌️!
#the butts chronicles#ogh but yea. been rough.#as said I have no idea if we'll keep this house cause man shits been fucked#uhhhh. lets see. recently my sister got into a fairly nasty argument with her husband since they were both drunk and hes a bit of a. hm#quick to being mad guy? I spose? but yea they made up and he actually apologized to me and my family for that so. its okay?#OH YEA FUCK LOL a few weeks ago fuckin tecksas got hit nasty with a hurricane and GUYS. I FREAKED OUT SO BAD LOL#cuz there was hail with the rain but since. I dont think we even ever experienced hail here I was scared that my ceiling roof broke again#and that it was the rain leaking to my room ceiling and was about to burst my ceiling so I legit started hyperventilating and panicking#with like. short and heavy breathing and almost crying badly until I went to look outside and saw hail and only slightly calmed down#oh but yea it was nasty lol. then the next day almost the entire block lost power and apparently sparks were happening cause fallen trees#uhhh. lets see. hmmm. OH OH RIGHT DAMN I FORGOT WE GOT A PUPPY LOL#we've gotten a lil pup all the way back from dec? iirc and she is now older and a shit lol shes in her teething phase and whatnot#still p cute tho and very puppyish. oh yea also during dec our power went out and ogh man dec was so freezing literally.#almost as bad as the one from. uhhh I cant remember the exact year but I remember it being within these past 4 years at least cause I read#a t0h fic during it lol. oh yea speaking of. we also changed our light company and damn. its been not bad so far! we had to pay up to 300#in our old company and now we dont even get to 200 so far! hope Im not jinxing it! hmm oh did I already say before that I had to get a new#phone? cause I did and I did not enjoy it lol. had it for a while and now and its arguably worse cause no damn headphone plug-in#I think I did mention this but in case. I did finish counseling. well more accurately they required payments again since things and whatnot.#I think? I mentioned the stuff I got for my bday and chmisas. I got mostly neat stuff. I guess. one of them has still yet to arrive lol#uhhhh. hrm. I did get Mr. Martinet's autograph as a present! hrmmm#my other sister got another surgery a while back and its been relatively the same since. hmm. my only other living grandparent passed away#me and my ex got into a. not great argument cause mistakes and whatnot. raccoons in the attic thats hopefully taken care of for now#aaaaand the plushes I ordered a damn near year ago have been technically canceled cause of unfortunate circumstances for the creator#who just kinda. posts things now lol ig.#but yea. lots. holy shit guys. lots has happened. fuck man. I think Ive been way more tired than I thought.#not to mention the past weeks of just. reflecting. man#uhhh#long post#LOL i gues#but yerp.
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My Boss: I want to send out quotes to all our customers with old computers but I don't want it to take a month.
Me: Okay, I've been building a spreadsheet with all the computers that can't upgrade to Windows 11, why don't we send customers a structured schedule of replacements so they can swap those out over the next eighteen months?
My Boss: Sounds good, but just quote them all at once. How many can you get out today?
Me: Uhhhh well getting the data from each computer takes a couple minutes and we manage a couple thousand computers so if I work through the client list alphabetically I can maybe do a couple clients a day? Maybe five?
My Boss: I said I don't want it to take a month.
Me: Okay, well, how about this, I'll work on this while we've got phone coverage. I'll spend five solid hours on it and I'll ignore my teams channels and email and just do this until Patty leaves at two and I have to take over the phones, because yesterday I was slammed with stuff and didn't get any work in on the list. I'll just focus on this alone for five straight hours and I'll respond to other stuff in the afternoon.
My Boss: Well you can't ignore the techs, if they need you you need to drop what you're doing to get stuff done for them.
Me: And that's why putting together this list has taken a month *so far.*
My Boss: Well, figure it out. I want to get these quotes out today.
-----
Anyway so that's why I'm fucking around on tumblr at work. If I'm going to fail at the task he's set anyway I might as well be relaxed while I'm failing at it.
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Have you got any thoughts to share about Sphene? I saw your post about how misrepresented FFXIV’s female characters are, and I’ve been hoping to see anything more than the typical “Evil AI colonizer etc.” or “Tragic woman who can never change ever” or “Wuk Lamat’s girlfriend”. Maybe our interpretations will differ but I’ll be happy if you can provide anything more complex than those.
Sure! Throwing all this under a read-more for anyone who hasn't finished 7.0 yet. I think I'll probably expand on this more later but wanted to get initial thoughts down. (Note after writing: I meant this to be brief but uhhhh brevity is not my strong suit sorry. This take just sort of ends abruptly because I realize I'm rambling.) Again, spoilers through the end of 7.0 MSQ.
I think Sphene is the sharpest work the game has done yet in casting the antagonist as the noble double of the protagonist (a well it returns to a lot with Emet, and Zenos, and Golbez, and...). But because the protagonist here is Wuk Lamat and not the Warrior of Light, that's also a much more defined and interesting role. To me, Wuk Lamat is, above all, the Righteous Queen, who rules thoughtfully, wisely, and justly, and whose claim to the throne is justified by her moral clarity. Sphene, in turn, is also a wise and good queen, one who undertakes all her actions with her people first in her hearts, a sense of compassion towards all, and a clear eye for the consequences and costs of her intended course of action. And it leads to utter disaster, for her, her people, and the people of Tural. That rocks!
The first half of 7.0 is about justifying the fact that Wuk Lamat's going to be Dawnservant. Wuk Lamat is compassionate, curious, wise, and open-minded. She wins over rebels and malcontents not by asserting her authority or by strength of force, but by taking her obligations to them (as her subjects) seriously. She knows many of her subjects personally and takes a great interest in their lives, and she respects even those who openly oppose her.
And everything Wuk Lamat does, Sphene does to 11. Wuk Lamat respects her subject peoples and is curious about their cultures? Sphene forcibly annexes Yyasulani, but goes out of her way and expends Alexandria's limited resources to enable the remaining Xak Turali to live in their accustomed way if desired (…to the extent allowed by the new permanent lightning storms and the internal conflicts caused by regulator adoption). Wuk Lamat cares about her people not just in the abstract but as individuals? Sphene visits sick kids, knows them by name! Wuk Lamat understands the burden of rulership is too great and cedes half her power to her brother? Sphene recognizes her own weaknesses and makes a deal with the devil to keep Alexandria's culture alive! Wuk Lamat is willing to die for her people? Sphene will forcibly traumatize herself into being a better queen, if that's what rulership demands.
For an expansion that spends the first half being like "wow isn't this perfect candidate for the crown so likable and humble? wouldn't it be nice to be ruled by a good king?," it sure is funny that the final boss is THE QUEEN ETERNAL and she hits you with attacks like LEGITIMATE FORCE and ABSOLUTE AUTHORITY and ROYAL DOMAIN. This, to me, is Sphene's role: she complicates and questions the themes we've developed in the first half. Most importantly to me, she makes us ask: what is devotion to a people or culture even worth?
There's a thing I kept thinking of constantly during Dawntrail, not because I think it directly influenced the game in any way but because the parallels were so stark and startling. It's Jonathan Hickman's New Avengers #18 (2014). Truthfully, I'm not a big comics guy; I only know this sequence because Ta-Nehisi Coates cited it as inspiration for his Black Panther run on Twitter once (I also didn't read TNC's run, I was following him for politics talk). Forgive me, comics people, if I get any details wrong. The parallels are almost comical, though. It goes like this:
A superhuman secret society formed of some of the smartest heroes (and villains) in the land re-forms to oppose an existential threat caused by incursions from other dimensions that threaten to cause literal collisions between Earth and its alternate dimension counterparts. Seeing no other alternatives, they undertake work on a weapon to destroy these other worlds. T'challa—king of a fictional hyperadvanced nation called Wakanda, and also the superhuman Black Panther—meets with his ghostly predecessors, the previous Black Panthers/kings, for he fears the moral stain on his soul and the souls of the people of Wakanda, if they survive explicitly by killing their alternate counterparts, will be too heavy to bear. His ancestors are not impressed.
To them, there is no question at all. A king's duty may be complex in the execution, but it is simple in its conception. Your people come before all others. Always. This is, must be, the fundamental ethic of a good king. To do otherwise would be a betrayal of the social order on which this imagined good monarchy is built. In a situation like this, the only option is to do what you must to protect them. "Will there be a cost? Yes. Might the universe burn? Let it. . . . You will kill them all if it means Wakanda stands. The golden city must never fall."
"I will do what I must" is Sphene's guiding principle. It is so important to her that when she recognizes that her sentimental attachments are making her waver in her duty, she severs them entirely, sacrificing her whole identity to the throne. It is also implicitly Wuk Lamat's position: she has no choice but to fight Sphene because to do otherwise would be to fail to protect her people. In fact, it's briefly even sort of the Warrior of Light's position, as when you tell Sphene before her trial that you understand what you must do, which is shut her down to protect others.
(One quick thought about the Warrior of Light: one cool thing about the antagonist this time being a double in a more exact way than Emet or Zenos is that it means other characters get a chance to relate to her differently than Wuk Lamat. The Warrior of Light, for example, is pressed into her service immediately upon your first meeting as the Queen's Champion, there to defend her if need be against all evil. This role is further affirmed by both robot Otis and Endless Otis, who essentially hand off their role as her knight to you, and reinforced when you flash back to the "might I call upon your aid" moment right before the end. Except, of course, you are loyal not just to her, but to the principles she represents, which her own acts betray, and so your ultimate act of aid is to essentially pass judgment on her and execute her. In a sense, you become the internal safeguard that a political system is supposed to have to protect against this very issue, and which Alexandria explicitly lost when it cast out/forgot Otis. Very Voeburt/ShB tank quests, it owns.)
But really, it's Sphene who embodies this sort of grim logic best. Aside from her transformation into the Queen Eternal, it's also why she suggests you simply become Alexandrians. It's the only way for her to reconcile her values and worldview, which have backed her into a corner where preserving Alexandria has come to mean a maximalist declaration of war on all life outside its borders because the kind of absolutely pain-free life she envisions for her citizens is completely unsustainable.
In this reading, one of Sphene's main beats is to unsettle what has preceded her in MSQ. In nearly all respects, she shares your values. She prizes life, is curious about other cultures, believes in the greatest good for the greatest possible number. But she is also a queen, and therefore irrevocably (in her eyes) tied to her state. Gulool Ja Ja and Wuk Lamat (and Koana) are the mythical wise rulers, thank god--but what if Wuk had inherited a Turali state that wasn't desperately in need of cross-cultural understanding, but one in a state of war? What value would her deep love for the people of Tural have held then? Sphene says, it would have held no value. If the survival of your people means harming the innocent, you harm the innocent. Kingship allows for no alternatives.
But she also concedes, in the very next breath, that she is still kind of wrong. Because what happened here was not inevitable, despite her programming (a brief note: to me Sphene being programmed is exactly the same as Emet being maybe-tempered, it's a fantasy gloss on the idea of social and cultural education. "I was programmed for this" is really no different from "I was trained and educated for this"), because the truth is that this kind of thoughtful, principled devotion to the state and its people is also a form of sentimental attachment, in the end. One that is maintained not because it is natural, and necessary, but because the monarch, too, likes it, and gets something from it.
In so many ways, in so many senses, the monarch is the state. Kings and queens may fancy themselves merely a reflection of their people's needs and desires, but of course even a cursory glance at history will tell you that far more often, states reflect their rulers. Sphene and Wuk Lamat both suggest that their conflict was inevitable, but was it? Or is the truth, as Sphene glancingly acknowledges here, that she turned her own fears and desires into the same policy goals that led to this tragedy? And if so...what does that say of our Good Queen, Wuk Lamat? Perhaps this could be different if they met earlier, says Wuk Lamat. But when? When did Wuk Lamat ever not love her people so dearly that she would not have sacrificed herself for them, or caused mass death for the sake of their survival? When did Sphene not believe the Endless to be people, or the preservation of Alexandria to be the most important thing? Maybe she means "had we met before you met Zoraal Ja," but of course, we the player actually saw their meeting. And we know that Sphene even then was not the hapless naif she'd like to pretend. She always knew exactly what she was doing.
We know the price of this kind of thinking, this Hobbesian view that states are engaged in a struggle of all against all. Living Memory lets you walk through it. To preserve Tural, we exterminate the Endless. We befriend them, learn about their lives, promise to remember them, and then we destroy them and their homes, leaving nothing but a bleak blank landscape and the sound of wind. This is what Sphene would have done to Tural and Eorzea. Indeed, it's what she's already doing to the people of Yyasulani, because no amount of well-intentioned aid can make up for trapping people under the dome for 30 years and systematically eroding their culture through the resonators.
To me, this is what makes Sphene really work, that way she has of forcing Wuk Lamat and the player to commit the same kinds of sins she has. We'd like to think ourselves better than her, but of course, we've already reconciled with and integrated Mamook's brutal eugenicist regime back into Turali society well before we ever met Sphene. At the end of our long "wow isn't having a wise queen cool???" expansion, we are met with "Legitimate Force" and "Absolute Authority" and see them for what they truly are: nothing but tools of violence. No longer does the idea of the Warrior of Light hanging around Tural as Wuk Lamat's advisor have the same attraction, now that we have been reminded of the way the putatively unquestionable logic of kingship can ultimately lock even the wisest and kindest rulers into a path of war and exploitation and destruction.
I think Sphene is FFXIV's most interesting and nuanced depiction yet of a leader. She really, truly, wants nothing more than to save her people and protect them from pain. But even seemingly loving and compassionate goals like these can readily lead us down dark paths. She's a "hard men make hard choices"-type character, a noble but misguided opponent, but as a loving and elegant fairy queen instead of a grizzled knight or extremely sad man. She fucking rocks.
#sphene#ffxiv#dawntrail spoilers#dt spoilers#spoilers#overtagging this one lmao#sphene alexandros xiv#meta: durai report
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