#we'll see if i make any on either of my blogs. i have a lot of time while still struggling to find a job lmfaooo so:))))))

[lesbiancarat]

man, part of me really wants to type out a whole rant about this shit but I feel like if I do there won't really be a central point and it will just be a bunch of disjointed rambling. so all I'll say is I'm so fucking tired of svt being under a giant corporation. like regardless of opinion about pledis by itself/pre-hybe, at least then we a) knew what we were dealing with and b) had /some/ collective power as fans to influence the company (ex. getting closer MV and svt ring as merch incidents)

all the hybe acquisition did was add 10 more layers of politics onto everything. for every one thing you could argue hybe improved or fixed, there's like 100 other pieces of bullshit that got introduced directly or indirectly. and it's not even a situation of hybe trying to sabotage svt or whatever like some ppl try to fearmonger about, it's literally all just capitalism and trying to please shareholders and make a profit and I'm so fucking tired of it

[innielove]

hi i'm still alive, i will start queuing from my likes and from my tags soon 🫶🏻

[russellsppttemplates]

I thought you didn't want to tell anyone (Charles Leclerc)

It appears that the Leclerc family is growing

Note: english is not my first language. I got this request from @myheartgoesvroom a good while ago and I finally had the time to write it!

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

my masterlist

Tw: mentions pregnancy symptoms, feeling sick, being bothered by warm temperatures/heat

Tag list: @myloverjk-blog

"Are we all ready to go?", Charles checked with everyone inside the jet, seeing the nods and Charlotte, Lorenzo's girlfriend shrug her shoulders, "I slept funny last night, it's just tiredness", she said, closing her eyes and resting her head against the seat, "I'm going to sleep for a little bit".

Charles told the pilot they were ready, sitting next to you in the three seater, his mother sitting next to you on the other end, "I hope you are all going to take this time to rest", Pascale looked at all of you, "if I see any of you checking work e-mails, I'll swat your phones myself", she chuckled, seeing Arthur shake his head and Charles grab your hand in his, "if I see you in your phone, I'm locking it", you threatened, "you need to rest, amour, this season has been pushing you too much", you mumbled, kissing his cheek as Carla started talking about something she had seen on the news.

When you arrived at the airport, it didn't take long until you were in the van that was taking you to the hotel you were staying in, "well, these are some winding roads", Carla said, opening the window to get a little bit of fresh air, "we're nearly there, miss", the driver smiled apologetically, "but it is true, these roads are not the the weak".

"I'm usually fine, but motion sickness is bothering me a lot today", she muttered, taking big and deep breaths as she looked out the window, "it's that one there right? Looks really good!".

The check in was done seamlessly and everyone was given a card key before you headed to the villa, the staff members that helped you with the luggage also explaining a few of the amenities and how the services worked for you since you were staying in a villa and not in the hotel building.

"We have to go see about the rental cars, and the boat, too", Charles put his hands on either of his brothers' shoulder, "which one of you guys want to come with me?".

"I'll join you, and we can stop by the supermarket to get some snacks, yes?", Pascale suggested, grabbing her bag as the boys grabbed their wallets, "do you need us to go?", Charlotte asked, "no need, chérie, they can go and get the cars and we'll do the shopping. Go rest for a little bit, yes?", Lorenzo said to his girlfriend, kissing her forehead and leaving the three of you to unpack.

"The rooms are all pretty identical. The suite is bigger and has a bigger balcony, but they all have a bathroom", Carla pointed out as she opened the door to exemplify, "it has a bigger bed, but Charles will sleep glued to me, it's not like a bigger bed would make much of a difference", you blushed, "so if any of you guys want it, go for it. Or we can leave it for Pascale", you suggested, seeing the other two girls nod and go to each of the smaller rooms, leaving the one closest to the suite to you and Charles.

The room was decorated in a minimalist way, tones of white, beige and light brown complimented by the sunlight coming from the window to the balcony. While the girls unpacked, the boys and Pascale got back and discussed the plans for dinner.

"I can get them to deliver the food to the door, no problem", Charles said as Charlotte admitted that she was hoping for an early night, her headache still bothering her, "we just have to set the table and they'll bring anything we want", he showed them the menu, "I'm not picky", you said, "but if they have that local dish, you know the one with the chicken we had last year in that restaurant? I'll have that", you said to your boyfriend, getting up and heading to the kitchen with his mother, hoping you'd be able to find all the cutlery, cups and plates that you needed.

When the food arrived, everyone helped set it up in the table, "I'm just going to wash my hand quickly and I'll be right back", Charles mumbled, kissing your cheek as he held out his hand that seemed to have some sauce on it.

.

The first full day began with a walk along the beach since you wanted to get to know the area and Charles didn't mind joining you, walking hand in hand along the wooden decking, "it's really warm today", you pointed out, fixing your cap and adjusting your sunglasses, "yes, last year wasn't so warm, right?", he said, "it's a good thing we always have the time and the opportunity to come here year after year, specially as a family.

"They won't say it out loud, but I know maman, Lorenzo and Arthur, and girls, too, they consider you family already. The guys specially, I think they've always considered you part of our family and Pascale Leclerc herself has never failed to mention how much you and I were made for eachother since I was old enough to understand what that meant", he kissed your knuckles.

"I'm very grateful for that, I'm very grateful for you", you whispered, almost like you were telling him a secret even though you made conscious effort to let him know how much you loved him and cherished him everyday, not wanting him to ever entertain the idea that you didn't feel those things towards him.

The walk was going well until the heat started getting to you, "can we go walk along the water, please?", you caught Charles' attention, "I think it's getting a bit too warm for me, I'm nearly tripping over my steps", you giggled as Charles pulled you to the warm sand, "do you want me to carry you? Get some water? Look, there's a bar", he pointed, walking with you to the beach bar and getting a bottle of water, "here, amour", he handed you the bottle.

"I think it's the heat", you blushed, "and I admit I could be more diligent about my water intake", you admitted, holding Charles' hand in yours and pulling him towards the water, the freshness from the water in your feet helping you cool down.

Walking back to join the rest of the group, you noticed Charlotte in the water with Lorenzo and Pascale while Carla and Arthur stayed in the sun loungers, "I see Charlotte is feeling better, that's good", you smiled, arranging your towell and laying down on it, "can you reapply my sun block, please?", you asked Charles since he was still up.

"Sure", he grabbed the spray bottle, rubbing the product on your skin, "and are you feeling better?", he asked, "I think my mother always has a hand fan with her, I can go a look for it in her bag", he offered.

"Are you feeling okay?", Carla checked, emphasising you, "I'm fine, just bothered by the heat, I was not made for these temperatures", you chuckled.

"Oh, I just remembered that really hot summer in Monaco where you had to stay inside because the heat outside made your face go tomato red in less than a minute!", Arthur teased you, "Hey!! I was about eleven, I was going through puberty and, like I said, I wasn't made for these temperatures", you added, "Carla, if you want to to hit your boyfriend for that one, you have my blessing".

By the time the rest of the group came back, lunch time was approaching and you made your way to the villa, deciding to make something for lunch since you had the fully equipped kitchen. The boys were on the grill and Pascale was seasoning the fish, "you have to make sure it's properly cooked", Lorenzo explained to his younger brothers, assertive that no raw fish would end up on the table, "do you guys need help? Y/N is just finishing the salad, Carla went upstairs and Charlotte also went up to wash the salt off of her skin".

"She's okay, right?", Arthur asked, the worry in his voice noticeable, "I think so, yes, she said something about cream for her shoulders, I think", Pascale quirked her brow, "her skin was slightly red when we walked back here", Charles pointed out, still not convincing his youngest brother as he walked upstairs to check on his girlfriend.

"I don't want that towell, I want this one", Carla stated, swapping the identical towells on top of the sun loungers after everyhting was tidied and you decided to spend the afternoon by the pool, "sure have that one", Arthur smiled charmingly, "do you want anything else?", he asked her, "I can go and get if for you", he said as he saw her negative nod, moving to the lounger next to her, "I'd like a beer, actually", Lorenzo called for him, "then you can get up and go get it yourself, brother".

.

After you arrived back from dinner, Charlotte went upstairs so she could rest, Lorenzo excusing them and wishing everyone a good night before they went up, leaving you, Charles, Arthur, Carla and Pascale in the outside area, sitting in the sofas as you talked about the plans for the next day, "are we still up for the boat?", Charles checked.

"Do you feel better?", Arthur asked his girlfriend, rubbing her shoulder, "yes, I told you it was just the road. I'm not used to winding roads like that, not all of us can be fine at all that speed and turns and bumps", she nudged her boyfriend, "are you sure? We can just sit it out", Arthur insisted, "I'm fine, Arthur, let me go on the boat with my favourites. You'll also be there, but that's a pain I have to deal with", she teased him.

By the time Pascale asked for your intake on something, you were already asleep, holding one of the pillows, "Oh, bless her", she smiled, catching Charles attention to your figure, "I should take her to bed", he stated, getting up and storing his phone on his pocket.

"How do I...", he mumbled to himself, trying to find the best way to move you to the bedroom without waking up, "you can just wake her up, Charles, like usual", Pascale noticed her son's dilemma, "she needs her rest, she's... she needs all the help she can get from now on", he said, sliding his arm around your back and the other under your knees, successfully holding you safely against him, "Good night everyone, see you tomorrow", Charles said lastly, heading to your bedroom.

When he laid you down on the bed, you stirred a little bit, opening your eyes, "hey, beautiful, I did my best not to wake you up", he cooed, softly touching your cheek, "you can go back to sleep, amour, here", he nodded, taking his t-shirt and shorts off before laying down next to you, pushing you to lay on his chest, "have a good sleep, my loves", he kissed the top of your head.

.

"Are you sure you're okay?", Arthur asked Carla again for what felt like the tenth time in the thirty minutes they had been on the boat, "if anything feels wrong, you tell me and we will go back to the port?", he nudged, "yes, amour, I will tell you", she told him, looking at you and silently questioning if you too thought this was a bit much, her quirked brow showing her own confusion, "he's just being caring, I guess? It would be worse if he didn't care about you", you reasoned, grabbing your bag and finding a spot to lay on.

"I have your water, amour, to make sure you actually drink more that the average for a little kid", Charles said, walking to meet you in the deck with two big bottles of water, "I have ice cold and room temperature, depending on how you're feeling", she smiled, sitting next to you and placing a tote bag down, "I also have snacks if you get peckish", he said, "we just had breakfast, Charles".

"I know, but of you get peckish, it's okay, it's normal, so you have your snacks here if you want them", he added, laying on his stomach as his arm wrapped your body near your waist, his hand rubbing small circles and shapes on your tummy.

.

"Lorenzo just called me to check if I was okay. Am I being inconsiderate if I think this is too much?", Charlotte confided with you, "don't look at me, Charles suggested I sit this paddle game out 'and take the opportunity to rest, amour', like that's not what I have been doing", you reasoned, seeing Carla walk in with a pharmacy paper bag, "Arthur asked someone from the reception to bring me this, and then he texted me saying that 'they're safe' for me. Isn't medicine safe anyway?", she took a box from the bag, "those are anti-sickness pills", Pascale recognised after reading the box.

"We all believe something is wrong with them, don't we?", Charlotte was the first to point it out, verbally you soon after found out, as Pascale shook her head as he laughed, "something has been wrong with them since this holiday started. I know I raised attentive boys, but neither of them have let either of you out of their sight, I mean, yesterday I heard Charles tell Y/N that he was going to use the bathroom and he would leave the door semi open so she could call him if she needed anything", Pascale offered, seeing you roll your eyes, "that was true, I was hoping no one heard it", you blushed, "no worries, the walls are not that thick, chérie, and Charles didn't exactly whisper either", she rubbed your shoulders.

"So they're treating us like we are made of porcelain and no one knows what is up with them?", Carla asked, "a couple of nights ago, Lorenzo told me he would wait until I was ready to tell him", Charlotte shrugged, "I just let it slide because I didn't know what he was talking about and, honestly, I was closer to dreamland than I was to here, so I didn't pay it too much attention".

"What would you tell him, though? And it seems like they haven't talked about whatever is going on between them either. Was it something they saw?", you reasoned.

"We have to try and think like they're thinking so we can figure out", Carla said, "a hard task at hand considering how they think", Pascale retorted.

"They've been very caring with us, more than usual, and it's each one of them with each one of us, and not with you", you pointed to Pascale, "do they think we're ill? We're not mad at them, right?", you looked over, "so, it's, like a health thing, something that requires changes in the long run and- Oh no", you pitched in, sure that if you were a cartoon, the light bulb would be lit up on top of your head.

"I think my card is not working properly, I'm going to the front desk to see if they can sort it out or give me a new one", you informed Charlotte and Carla as you closed the door before you. When you went to the front door to grab the towells one of the staff left there, you weren't quick enough and let the door close, and when you tried to ring your card in, it didn't work.

"I'm sorry for the inconvenience", the man at the front desk apoligised, "it's okay, these things happen. Thank you again, have a good day", you smiled at him, grabbing your new card and walking back to the villa.

The house had three big bedrooms, the suite, a big living area connecting the kitchen to the living room and the outside was even bigger. You had direct access to the patio where you had a big table and barbecue area, as well as a pool and a big garden with a small gate at the end that led to the beach. Overall, it was the perfect place for you to spend your holiday and you had been looking forward to spending time with family.

You were taking in the view and enjoying how the warm air surrounded you when you stumbled on someone, "I'm so sorry, are you okay?", you asked, looking at the whole situation and seeing a few games on the floor and a small box you recognised from the pharmacy.

"I'm good", a shaky voice said, "I'm sorry I ran into you, I have to admit I was distracted", a young woman around your age apoligised back to you, "I work with kids all day, why would I be so nervous to be pregnant?", she blurted.

Sensing her nerves, you thought you could help her, "do you need help with that? I'm pretty good in a crisis so I can be a sound mind of you want to", you attempted.

"Would you, actually? I really need to vent it all out", she cringed, "I'm staying right here, let me just tell the girls", you opened the door, "Carla! Charlotte!", you called, seeing them join you in the hall, "this is Ana", you introduced, "these are Carla and Charlotte, we are all dating brothers, different ones, I mean", you chuckled, "and Ana here could use our support because she has to take a pregnancy test", you smiled.

"It's very nice to meet you, you can use this bathroom, here", Charlotte said warmly as she opened the door of the bathroom by the stairs.

After reading the instructions, you left Ana to do her thing before she opened the door again, "so,", she smiled nervously, "is this your first time here?". "Yes, we've never been here. Last year we stayed somewhere else. So far, so good", Carla responded, "pardon my question, but are counting on a certain result?".

"My boyfriend and I have been together for a long time, and we've not been not trying, I guess?", she chuckled, "it's just nerve wracking you know? I work with kids, that's why I have all of those games, I work at the kid's club", she explained. The phone with the timer beeped, catching her attention and making you rub her back soothingly as she got it and read the results, "you're pregnant, Ana", you smiled.

"She must've put it in the trash and they saw it, let me check", you said as you walked to the bathroom, "there it is! She put it in the trash and they all saw it", you reasoned.

"Well, that surely explains a lot of it. I have seen Charles, particularly, dote on your like your a porcelain doll, but even these last few days were unusual for him", Pascale chuckled, "the way he helped you up the stairs? That's when it clicked for me that something was really different".

"Well, the things is that there's nothing different", you stated, "and Lorenzo and Arthur too, then!", you rubbed your temples, giggle alongside with the rest of the women in the room, "Pascale, with all due respect because you've raised these men impeccably, sometimes they're not the sharpest", Carla touched her shoulder, "should I be offended because I followed their train of thought?", you wondered.

When the boys arrived back from their paddle game, you and the rest of the group stayed in the living room as they headed up for showers, claiming you'd prefer to stay in for the night since you weren't feeling well, earning all of the three boys' approvals without further questions.

Charles was the first to come down, hair still wet as he walked to you, kissing your forehead, "do you need anything, amour?", he asked and acknowledged your negative answer, sitting next to you and cuddling you to his chest, "have you been feeling good today?", he brushed your hair and pulled it behind your ear. On your end, you were trying your best to keep a straight face, "yes, I'm fine, got all the rest I needed", you smiled, kissing his cheek and allowing him to place his hands under your top you were wearing and touch your tummy.

A little while later, Lorenzo walked dowstairs too, stopping by the kitchen to grab a bottle of water for him and another for Charlotte, checking if she was feeling better while Arthur also joined you in the living room.

"I'm just ordering dinner", Charles said as he typed on his phone screen, "they say they can put everything with eggs on the side and separately, and there are no raw ingredients, everything is washed and I-", he was interrupted by Carla's loud laugh.

"I'm sorry, I can't do it, not when I know where all of this is coming from", she continued as Charlottle broke down, too.

"What do you mean?", Charles said as the confusion on his face became clear, "Charles, amour, look at me", you called, "do you think there is something wrong with me? That my health status has changed?", you questioned honestly.

Charles fumbled with his words, "I mean, amour, I- do you want me to say it out loud or whisper in your ear? I didn't know of you wanted to tell anyone because you haven't told me either, and that's okay! But do I say it now?", he yelped, "you're pregnant, Y/N", he stated.

Arthur and Lorenzo got up as if on cue, both belting out "Y/N's pregnant, too?", before looking at their girlfriends and seeing their giggles, "you think the three of us are pregnant?". The brother's looked between them, "I saw the test in the trash bin, and Carla had just been in the bathroom, so I assumed we were having a baby", Arthur reasoned, "Charlotte hasn't been feeling well, it's her test", Lorenzo offered, "are we talking about the same test on that bathroom or has that bathroom been the 'pee on the stick and find out you're pregnant' Station?", Charles argued back.

Chuckling you got up and cupped Charles face with your hands, "it happened once and it's Ana's test", you smiled, "the girl from the kid's club. She was scared to take it and we gave her some support, that's all", you smiled, "no one's pregnant here", you finally said.

The boys made a collective "oh" noise until Arthur spoke, "you were not feeling well and I just thought that it was yours", he said to Carla, accepting her hug, "same goes to you, you kept saying the food tasted funny and I connected the dots, that apparently weren't so clear", Lorenzo said to Carla.

Charles had shifted on his feet a couple of times before he turned to you, "I thought you didn't want to tell anyone, that's why I didn't say anything. If you did not feel comfortable in telling it, it was because you wanted privacy and I respected that. I thought you'd eventually announce it when you were ready so I didn't push for it either, I just wanted to be there", he admitted. You kissed his jaw soflty, "well, there's no baby in here, the test does not belong to any of us".

"It's a good thing to know, though. Whenever the time comes, I'm having enough grandchildren to spoil to my heart's content", Pascale clapped, getting up and heading to the outside area, "Oh, look at that sunset, it's beautiful!".

"So, no baby...", Charles trailed off, holding your hands in his, "I have to admit that, in a way, I'm relieved, because that would change up our lives a lot, especially with three babies in the family", he chuckled, "but when things are more settled, in a few years surely, we can start our family if you want to", he smiled charmingly, "of course, whenever the time comes. I love you, Charles, I love you so much", you smiled, "but, please, whenever that happens, don't coddle me like I'm a porcelain doll", you attempted, "Oh, that will have a to be another negotiation I'm afraid, amour".

[freyito]

ꜱʟᴇᴇᴘɪɴɢ ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ɢᴀʀᴅᴇɴ

✭ pairing(s): gallagher x ftm reader

★ summary: Gallagher has been the only one in your life to make you feel like a man. Even if you can mold and shape yourself in the Dreamscape, make yourself look and feel as Cis as you want, and yet, nothing has been able to fill the hole you feel within your very existence... aside from Gallagher. And now you can't find him. You can't find Gallagher. You can't find him.

✧ a/n: HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!!!!! im gonna be writing a lot more x male readers and especially a lot more x ftm readers... i started this blog cause wherever i looked in whatever fandom i was in i never found many male readers... and especially barely any ftm ones... and it feels like i havent written any proper x m! reader fics in a while, soooo... we'll start here. i'll still write gn reader of course!!!! but i like lowkey haven't written much that matches my identity in a bit.

🗒 cw: ftm reader, 2.2 story spoilers, dysphoria like mad dysphoria, anxiety, depression, sensory overloard, grief (?), hurt/no comfort, proofread

✎ wc: 2.2k

The Dreamscape has been quiet lately. Even Golden Hour was quiet, silent, and whenever you looked to the sky, its brilliance had begun to dim. The Dreamflux Reef had always been quiet, too, and yet now, it was uncanny. Micah had been so aloof, answering your questions curtly, and Gallagher hadn’t even sent you a text. Every time you texted him, it never went through, as if he wasn’t in an area with service. Which was normally okay, you knew he had to be out on a job or something, but it had been a whole week and he hadn’t even come back to his bar. When you had asked anyone about Gallagher, they had given you this look like they didn’t know where your lost dog was… which isn’t exactly far from the truth, you suppose. But you could see some sort of guilt behind their eyes. And that made you uneasy.

Sure, he had gone weeks at a time without being with you, but he always sent texts, and most people knew where he was, especially the locals. His last text to you was an ‘I love you babyboy.’, which isn’t abnormal, he had a habit of texting you that specifically around five times a day. He had to drill it into your head. He always made sure you knew you were loved, especially by him. You were ‘something special’, as he said, ‘the best thing that ever happened to him’, ‘his pretty boy’, and the list goes on. But your phone remains eerily silent.

You can’t help but check it every other minute, wading through the crowds of Golden Hour, the last place you wanted to be right now. No one in Dreamflux Reef would give you a definitive answer, no one had seen him, or if they had, they gave you indecisive answers. He was out on a case, he was at the lounge, anything to get you off their backs. You had to admit, you were becoming increasingly nagging, annoying, even. But who wouldn’t? Your boyfriend had been gone a whole week with no trace of him, no communication, and you were starting to think the worst.

Golden Hour makes your head spin, looking under every literal rock you can find, getting any info you can from the most lucid strangers and even mumbling drunkards. You are desperate, any little bit of information you use. Even if they had just seen a man with brown hair or a man with hazel eyes. Of course, none lead you to Gallagher. And the Bloodhounds aren’t of any help either, they all stare at you with confused looks and some even tell you to stop playing around.

You’ve already given up, the hustle and bustle of Golden Hour making you feel even more hopeless, the feel of everyone's eyes on you, not fitting in, it all sinks in once more. You were better off putting up lost dog posters at that point. Was it possible for people to go missing in the dreamscape? You had no idea, but you were holding onto the hope that perhaps this was all some twisted nightmare that had crept into your head, but each step you took disproved that thought.

Perhaps reality will have answers, and while you feel so reluctant to wake up, to be seen once more. You had never met Gallagher out of the dreamscape, and only now did you realize what you could be getting yourself into. Perhaps he had just… left? After so many years? Surely not, right?

You return to reality, unsteady. Your body feels frail, even if you had been maintaining it properly. It feels odd to be back in reality, where suddenly how you look, how you talk, and your mannerisms all mattered. You had to act masculine, you had to shut up and walk tall, hyper aware of the eyes on you. Even if it only takes only a minute to get to the front desk, even if you know the guests will never recognize you in the dreamscape. You still can’t help but feel self-conscious, being able to hide behind the veil of the dreamscape for so long, now out in reality, feeling as if you were stripped bare for all to see. Which you weren’t, but perhaps your nerves were getting to you.

When you reach the front counter, your nerves don't abate. They only grow in size, the fear quickly creeping through your system. There was no guest named Gallagher, and you didn’t even know what room he had been staying in. They can’t tell you anything considering that you yourself aren’t the customer they are looking for. But the way they look at you just as the people in Golden Hour and Dreamflux Reef do tells you all.

Reluctantly, you make it back to your room. You don’t know if you want to go back to the Dreamscape, you’re already shook up as is. If something so dire could make you resurface from the vast, blissful ocean that was the Dreamscape, why would you go back? No sign of him for a week, reality or otherwise, and not a word from those closest to him. Do you really wish to go back? Where you know your current efforts have failed. Where that sinking feeling that you know he’s gone takes hold of you?

You stare at the dreampool for a second longer, trying your best to shove down your doubts and your fears, and sink back into the sweet allure of dreams, waking up once more in the Dreamflux Reef. You stay where you are for another minute, a place you’ve called home for several years, a place that would be filled with hearty laughter, maybe even the clinking of glasses, and smell like Gallagher’s mild cologne. That scent has dimmed recently, either because he hadn’t come home, or perhaps you were… used to it. His clothes were still strewn about on the bed, what he was going to wear the day after he had disappeared. You didn’t dare move them, not once, afraid of losing all the little things about him.

When you finally exit the house, the streets feel colder. It’s even quieter than before, and most residents look… somber. Perhaps they always looked that way, and you just didn’t know. You figure you’d try your luck with Micah again, either to get closure or just wallow with someone who was close to Gallagher, you are unsure.

You had done your best to ignore the… tower that seemed to breach out of nowhere in the Reef, despite how tall it had been and just how oddly enchanting it was. You, like many of the Penacony locals, didn’t enjoy change. To have something like that just simply grow out of the ground you knew when those Trailblazers came around was jarring. That had also been the day that Gallagher had stopped coming home, and the events that followed had made you so desperate to find him once more. This beautiful dream, torn asunder by some madman’s delusion of a grander, peaceful life. You never did like the family, you never liked Sunday.

On that note, Micah was nowhere to be seen, at least where you looked. Not all the way down in the alleys or by the train station, not in the dive bar playing pool, nowhere. You had no where but to ascend those damned stairs that faced towards a false moon. You didn’t want to, not at all. It wasn’t intimidating, but every time you lingered near it for too long, you felt uneasy. It had an air to it that spoke of danger, something that told you it ‘was not for you’. And here you were, stood in front of it and the three graves that paid homage to it.

The first step you take bathes you in a stillness unlike one you’ve ever felt. Tranquility follows as you continue to walk, the world is suddenly so quiet, the hustle and bustle of the Reef fades out, and you are left with blissful nothingness. The only sound that follows you is your steps. It isn’t so bad when you think about it, it’s comforting, in a way.

Micah is tending to the plants that surround a small little courtyard. He’s relaxed, untensed, and seems genuinely at peace. It’s been rare to see someone like that in recent days. When he hears you, he lifts his head and gives you a soft smile, one that reeks of pity, as if he knows what you are going to ask him.

“Micah–”

“I have no idea where Gallagher is,” Micah sighed, his smile faltering slightly. “Not a text, not a word.”

At this point, you knew people were lying to you. Micah’s reminder only makes you realize just how much people were. “I know that. Tell me what happened to him.”

Micah is taken aback by your blunt reaction, but easily gives in. The jig is up it seems, and he doesn’t fight back any longer. With a soft huff and slump of his shoulders, he sets aside his current task, turning his full attention towards you.

“Then we’re gonna have to sit down and talk. It’s a bit of a doozy.”

.  * 　　　 ✦     .     　⁺ 　 .

Your head spins with all the details. It’s all so confusing, Gallagher, being… fictional? The man you had fallen in love with was simply just a creation, not tangible, not real. What were you supposed to do with that information? All you had been doing for the past hour or so is staring at the wall. Your room is silent, as is all things now, dark and lonely. It’s suffocating. You feel empty, devoid of whatever was there, whatever had filled the hole in your heart, as cliche as it was.

A hollow home, a hollow heart, and not a soul to mend it. Those welcoming arms are no more, or perhaps, never were. And yet, his clothes still remain, his toothbrush and cologne and shampoo and everything else stay in the bathroom as if he were. If you spaced out long enough, you could still hear his hearty laughter, if you sink a little deeper into the pillows you can smell faint traces of his shampoo. Anything to hold onto what you love. Who you love.

You need to drown yourself in something before you lose your mind. You want to cry, and yet… you can’t. It is still all catching up to you. You wander around the house mindlessly, desperate for something to happen. Anything. But there is nothing. When you stop, there is null, a terrifying distance between you and the empty kitchen. You have to get out of here, you have to leave, this home is not yours anymore. It is simply a house.

Your feet bring you away from the Reef, finally, settling you in the Reverie. You follow a familiar path, one that you had walked on a particularly bad night, that had led you to the Dreamjolt Holstery. It was unwise of you to fall in love with the mixologist, but here you were, several years in, finding out he was quite literally made up.

Slowly, you take a seat at the bar, the lounge around you empty, dead. You have no idea where the bartender is, but you don’t care. This is the same seat you had taken that night. It was something you should’ve forgotten, really, such a minor detail that now felt all too big and meaningful to your heart. You can still remember what had torn you up, it was a particularly bad day, feeling too dysphoric, and no matter what you did, even in the Dreamscape, it had done nothing to affirm your identity more. So you sought out a drink, or a few, to wash down that bitter taste that plagued your taste buds all day. And there he was, a little disheveled as always, eyebags, gravelly voice, something about him just… washed over you as if he were a dream. Which, looking back, apparently he was. You remember fighting between two thoughts; wanting to be him, or wanting him. To be a man so… masculine, gruff, big and intimidating, something like that…

Your nostalgic daydream is broken by steps, and a figure above you. You look up, hoping that you’ll see the same scene once more, that Gallagher will shoot you a smile and a chuckle, ask you what’s got you down, but instead, it’s Siobhan. She looks down at you with a sympathetic smile, as if she knows exactly what you were thinking about. You can’t tell if you feel angry or sad, or neither. You simply push those feelings down.

“What can I get you tonight?” She asks, her voice even and calm as always.

You take a minute to think, unsure if you want something strong to keep you occupied or something that could serve as a tribute. Ultimately, you settle with…

“A glass of uh… The Big Sleep,” You can’t help but chuckle lightly at the name, even if the chuckle was devoid of joy. Siobhan doesn’t mention it, simply smiles and nods.

“... To the ghosts of the past?”

“Yeah… to the ghosts of the past.”

© freyito, 2024 | masterlist | queue | kofi | star header by roseschoices DO NOT REPOST AS YOUR OWN OR USE FOR AI/AI CHATBOTS.

[hotvintagepoll]

Welcome to the HOT AND VINTAGE MOVIE STARS poll blog! The Hot & Vintage Men Tournament and The Hot & Vintage Movie Women Tournament are now wrapped—congrats to Toshiro Mifune and Eartha Kitt! If you are here for the Dracula Daily polls, those will be posted regularly following the progress of the Substack newsletters.

All polls—including ongoing polls, previous rounds, old tournaments, the various shadow brackets, the Dracula Daily polls, and fun mini polls—can be found in the #hotvintagepoll tag.

FAQs:

"What is the next tournament?" We'll either do the scrungly little guys contest or the Ultimate Hotties tournament.

"When is the next tournament?" Sometime later this summer. I need to take a break, but then I'll be back.

"I want to find my favorite hottie!" Try a tag search for them (ie, use a hashtag in my search bar to find every post I've tagged them in). If you still haven't found your hottie, they either did not fit the criteria of being a movie star from 1910-1970 or they did not make it past the prelims.

“Can I start submitting for the future tournaments? I have guys! I have propaganda!” Please wait for me to post a submission form or otherwise formally announce a tournament before submitting anything.

The views expressed in the propaganda are not my own. I don’t submit my own propaganda, and I don’t change what’s submitted beyond fixing obvious spelling mistakes. If you hate a poll bio or a pic, let me know and send me something I can use instead.

I don’t post or boost negative propaganda about any of the hotties. If you really hate that someone is winning, send me positive propaganda for their hot opponent instead. A lot of these hotties were flawed or problematic in some way—or straight up garbage—but for reasons I go into here, I don't boost anti-propaganda.

If I see repetitive, trolling, and/or bigoted remarks in the comments, I may block you from this bracket. If you want to point out a competitor's problems in the replies, that's fine, but if I see consistent bad-faith trolling or targeted harassment of anyone, you will be blocked.

"Tel me again who won the major tournaments?" Eartha Kitt was crowned the hottest Hot & Vintage Movie Woman, and Toshiro Mifune won the Hot & Vintage Movie Man Tournament.

"Tell me more about this shadow realm?" There is too much lore.

“My FAQ isn’t on here :(” send me an ask! I love hearing from you guys—just please check these basics first.

Tournament schedule post-hiatus:

Ongoing: Dracula Daily casting polls

Possibly next: Scrungly Little Guys contest (gender neutral)

Possibly next: Ultimate Hottie Tournament (top brackets of the hot men & hot women competing together)

TBD: Horror Hotties (Frankensteins, Draculas, Brides, etc.)

TBD: Dandy Detectives (Marples, Sherlocks, Nancy Drews, etc.)

fun mini polls that pit sets of characters from the same movie together, like the Philadelphia Story or Seven Brides for Seven Brothers ones (these can be found in the #minis tag)

Thank you for being here! Enjoy the polls.

[jillsandwhichs]

RE Character x Reader Smutshot Collection , Chap 5 , "Office" work

Masterlist

Pairing: F!reader x Albert Wesker

Summary: You and Albert are doing an experiment together and decide to experiment with something else

Status of your guy's relationship in this one shot: Co-workers

WC: 3.1k

Type: NSFW

Warnings: You two argue, Angry make out/sex, Choking, Slapping, Dirty talk, Spanking, P in V, He pins you down, Cums inside of you twice, Hair pulling and No aftercare

A/n: Hi! Hope you all enjoy. Please check out my masterlist, there's a lot of stuff there. You can get to know me, you can see the rules of my blog and then you can see all of my fanfictions. You'll be able to find the previous chapters to this fic and upcoming ones. You'll also be able to find my Wattpad & AO3. Comments, reblogs & likes are appreciated. Thank you

This is it. This is the moment you and Albert have been anticipating. As he used the tube to drop some of the tablets into the mixture, you two stepped back, waiting to see the results. What the two of you have been attempting to do was enhance part of the T virus, not that it needed it, it was already extremely strong, but Albert and you wonder what it could possibly do. Any lifeform that injects it into them could experience anything, Albert has already offered to be the subject for it, but you're unsure.

The liquid began to fizz and bubble up like soda pop. "Step back." Albert pushed you back with him, the thought of the vial shattering due to heat or it overflowing and somehow managing to hit the two of you was scary - Neither of you wanted that. That entrancing blue liquid began to change into a more thicker substance. "Oh Albert, I believe it is working." You said to him with a soft tone. "Let's not get our hopes up." Albert replied, his voice rather deep and sly sounding, like a fox would sound if it were human.

"And if it does work?" "We'll use it on the ultimate life form." "You?" You questioned the slim, blonde man. Albert only laughed in reply. "You shall see, dear." He always either called you dear or love, maybe it was something he did with all of his former female colleagues.

As for Albert, you don't know much about him. He did tell you on vital thing though and that was that he once worked for Umbrella, those damned bastards. He met you through The Organization though, but you split from them. They were a little too sketchy for your liking. Now ever since, the two of you agreed to work together to bring the T virus into it's most important state, the state that'll enhance it like never before.

Finally, the virus stopped fizzing and went back to it's normal look, although it was still thicker. "When are we going to use it on the uh, 'Ultimate lifeform'?" You asked of him, watching as he slipped his gloves up to pick up the vial. "We? Love, I thought we only agreed to work on it together, not to stick together." He chuckled, screwing the top back onto it and slipping it into a white case that had the Umbrella logo stained onto it.

Ignoring his last words, you spoke up, "Umbrella?" "Need not to worry, it's merely a cover up, therefore, they'll assume it's the doings of the tragic pharmaceutical company." Albert assured you, setting the smaller white case into a black brief one. Little do you know, he's a double crosser.

"Let me help you, I helped you with this, let me see what our creation does." You demanded, you were relentless, Albert liked the spunk you had to you. "No, no, no, you aren't apart of the initial plan." "Now I am." "No you aren't, dear." Albert spoke with a condensing tone which absolutely rubbed you the wrong way. You knew Albert was off, you knew he was far from a good man but somehow you had managed to trust him, confide in him and truly think he'd allow you to see what you helped do.

Albert began to tread off, ignoring your pleas, as if he had absolutely no care in the world. You doubt he ever did. But working with him, you thought the two of you had formed something. You didn't expect to be friends with the man, hell, you didn't want to be. He does realize you know more than he thinks you do, correct? You may be gullible but you aren't fucking stupid. You know he's the captain of the S.T.A.R.S Alpha Squad, which he never thought to make you aware of.

"You will let me help, or else I'll leak what you've done to the public, and all those puny S.T.A.R.S members and that bastard Irons will know of your doings." You yelled as he headed for the white sliding door, he soon paused in his tracks, his head tilted down as he shook it. "What did you just say to me?" He growled. The man turned around, setting the brief case down and speedily headed towards you. You backed up, your back hitting one of the desks, a glass pitcher tipping over. You were scared of him, even if you didn't want to be.

He grabbed your neck, it wasn't hurtful, it was a light choke, but it sure as hell kept you in place. "You want to repeat that?" He grunted, his face only inches from yours. "You heard me, I'll tell them, I'll tell them all." You said sternly, attempting to get out of his grip. This had all happened so quickly. It was like a bomb dropping out of no where. His cat like shaped eyes stared into what seemed to be your soul, as if he was reading you and trying to catch a lie somewhere in your words.

"You know nothing." Albert shouted, slamming you against the wall. Your head hurt afterwards, despite the fact it was only a push. "I know a lot more than you think. I know about you being the captain, I know that you plan to betray them and shit, you probably aren't just working for The Organization either." You rambled on, Albert seemed to be surprised yet amused. "How'd you figure this all out, hm? Who're you truly working for?" "The Organization, because unlike you, I am not a shitty person." "Yes you are, you're helping develop a virus that could wipe out mankind." He shut your statement down real quick.

Both of his hands gripped the white counter top, anger in his face evidently. "Why?" He yelled, "Why must you help?" He was furious, clearly. You stepped closer to him, not being as scared as you were before. "Because, I want to see what it does, I wanna see what it is you plan to do." "But it's none of your business." "But it'll be the Police Department's business when I let them know what their precious captain has been up to." You countered his sentence. He scoffed rudely.

"You're pathetic." Albert spat out at you, pulling away from the counter and once again getting in your face. He was mad, really mad. You felt scared but not as you did before. If anything, this was the first time he wasn't so monotone; He seemed real as of now. Those blue orbs of his were easy to get lost in, and you found yourself finding it hard to get out of them, time and time again. He was furious, yeah, but he looked better than ever, admittedly.

Are you truly pathetic?

"Am I?" "Very much." "How so?" "Look at you, black mailing me. Scum to the Earth, you are." "As if you aren't completely black mailing the R.P.D." You stated rudely, crossing your arms and stepping closer to him, standing up for yourself as you should. A sly smirk formed on the mans face, seeming as if he was pleased by something. The smirk soon faded as he spoke up again. "I could kill you." "Yet you haven't." "Yet I will." "So then do it." You know he won't. He can't. He defies himself to not do so.

Now, it was as if the two of you were in a staring competition.

His cold, icy eyes were staring into your soft, delicate ones. You didn't know what to think nor what to say. You were stumped, he seemed to be too. Anything you said, you were able to clap back ten times harder. A look of defeat was plastered on his smooth face, irritatied is most likely how he was feeling.

You went to turn away, wanting to just get out of this mess but before you could even proceed with one step, he pushed you up against the wall again and smashed his lips to yours. Utter shock. "Why do you defy me?" He growled, lifting your arms above your head and keeping them there. You grinned into the kiss, your gentle lips mad against his obsessive ones. "Because someone has to." You snorted, kissing him back, oh how you've yearned for this. Albert was always an attractive man.

You'd be lying if you said you've never imagined how this very moment would go down.

You attempted to move your hands, but ultimately failed. He kept you in place. You wanted to touch him though, feel his slim body. "You enrage me." "You think you don't do the same?" You mumbled against his lips, moaning as he pressed himself into you, your body shoved up against the wall completely. His fingers were wrapped tightly around your small wrists, making sure you weren't going anywhere. "You should just be obedient, but no, you just can't be, can you? Do you give your other co-workers this difficult of a time?"

Great question! You don't. Just him.

"It's none of your business, what I do with other workers." You stated cockily, this earned a light slap to your face before he then grabbed it, staring at you once again. "You're a brat." He grumbled. "I am?" You were so cocky, so snarky. He couldn't stand it. It were as if he was looking into a mirror. He couldn't stand how similar you are to him, he couldn't believe there was someone out there like him. It drives him literally mad.

"Tell me," He began, a seductive tone playing off of his tounge. "Is this what you want? Hm? To be fucked? To be told what a brat you are? Because frankly, you seem to be enjoying this." He teased, his face once again so close to yours. "Is that what you want?" "That wasn't the question." He then practically tossed you against one of the desks, having you bent over in front of him. "I'll make sure this is quick, brats don't deserve the good girl treatment." Albert hummed out, you could hear him messing with his pants, then yours.

This was it.

"What are you going to do?" "Fuck you, hard. Make sure you stop disobeying everything I tell you, and what others tell you. Clearly, you need it." Albert scoffed at you. You felt pathetic but oh, in the best way imaginable. You allowed him to pull down your baggy, gray pants, the cold lab air hit your legs instantly, your faded unshaven hairs sticking up and your stomach doing a twirl; It felt more like excitement rather than being affected by the cold though.

"Pull your panties down, slowly, and stay in position." He ordered sternly. You were frozen. You didn't know if he was being serious or not. "Did you hear me?" "Yes..." "So get to it then." He grunted, taking his hand right across your ass. You didn't know whether to smile or yelp, both maybe?

You took both of your hands on either side of your panties, slowly yet surely pulling them all the way down. You could feel Albert staring you down, glancing at your ass as you listened to his demand. A pool of wetness sat in your panties, soaked into them, you wondered if Albert was hard or not, he had to be. You felt scared, being completely nude from the waist down now. You are self conscious, hopefully he doesn't notice that about you.

He came up from behind you, lifting your stomach up slightly, causing your legs to lift off of the ground and when you did that, he used his dress shoe to pull your panties out from below you. You turned your head to the side, waiting to see what he was going to do and what he did totally caught you off guard. He picked up your underwear, scrunching them into a ball and sniffing them, his eyes closing gently as he did. The pheromones releasing from them and into his brain seemed to cause the erection in his pants to only grow worse.

You could literally see the imprint through his underwear.

"Smells amazing." He growled, now taking off his undergarments.

Your breath shuttered, you were in awe with how this man was. He could be so angry yet so sexy all at once, how was that even manageable? He stuffed your underwear into the pocket of his lab coat, then he grabbed ahold of your waist, a grin on his face that you couldn't see considering he has you bent over the table. You felt his manhood press against your ass before he then pulled his underwear down, his hard cock hitting your ass, then part of your center, earning a soft sigh out of you.

"You will be quiet, don't make a single sound, got it?" "Yes." You nodded, resting your head against the table, on your arms which were also set on it.

Behind you, you heard some shuffling before you felt his dick enter you, not even a single fucking warning. A small squeal came from you, your eyes widened and you heard Albert's "Tsk, tsk tsk..." From behind you. "Stay silent." That was going to be your only warning, you presume.

He began to pump himself into you, every inch feeling never ending. He had to at least be six or seven inches, oh he was so big. He was on the thicker side though, you could tell. His girth shot into you like a bullet flying out of an automatic, he just didn't let up. His hands held your waist in place, his long fingers trailing on your midriff, all over it. You could hear his moans behind you, at least he was enjoying this as well.

It was hard to stay quiet. You wanted to moan, whimper, all of it. You needed to let out something. It simply felt so good. "Crazy how quiet you get once you're being fucked." Albert taunted from behind you. The sound of your guy's skin slapping was rowdy, especially when he'd go into a frenzy, he'd go super fast and hard, that's when it felt best. "Can I speak?" You whined out, closing your eyes tightly as his thrusts got deeper, hitting that far, sweet spot. "What do you have to say?" He questioned you.

"It feels amazing." You giggled, lifting your head up, stabling yourself finally. "Oh, does it now?" "Mhm." You moaned, instantly covering your mouth, but that didn't last long as he pulled your arm behind your back, then the other one. "No, uh uh, no cheating your way out of this, my dear." Albert teased, one of his hands holding your wrists in place, his other still on your waist. Your entire torso was laying on the white table now, it was a bit uncomfy but it was difficult to think about that when he was dicking you down.

With each thrust, the desk beneath you shook and shifted, pushing itself further up. Albert hadn't seemed to have taken notice of it though, unless he simply just didn't care. "You're such a bad girl, so disobedient." You were. He wasn't wrong. But look at him now, fucking it out of you. Maybe he's the bad and dirty one.

Like he read your mind, he pounded into you harder, his cock twitching within you, your tight walls clenched around him, your cunt dripping. "Bet you've had more than one worker fuck you like this in attempts to get your attitude straight, hm? But they never fucked you this good." Albert huffed out, his other hand now on the back of your desk. You felt paralyzed but there was no complaining from you, him man handling you was needed, you deserved it.

"No one can fuck you like I can." He finally stated before you felt his cum stream into you, earning the loudest moan out of you, it was so unexpected. You would've at least thought he'd pull out, but nope. "Jesus Christ." You attempted to stand up but he shoved you back down. "I'm not done with you yet." He began to move into you again, his erection forming back up inside of you, filling up your walls. "What?" "I'm not letting you go til you cum around me." Albert established with you.

Wow, what a gentleman...

You rolled your eyes at his statement.

How could he immediately go back to fucking directly after cumming inside of you? That's rare for men, super uncommon. But overall, you aren't complaining.

His hand that was on the back of your neck now slithered up to your hair, gripping it as he fucked you. Gosh, it felt amazing, it was a such an adrenaline rush. "Oh fuck." "Stay quiet." He groaned, tossing his head back as he continuously slammed into you. Oh you could feel it, your climax was about to hit it's peak, your pussy clenched around his member, milking him once again, his semen inside of you. A total creampie.

You then also came, all around his length. He pulled out of you as you did, leaving you there to have an orgasm alone, without his touch. You held onto the table for dear life as you did. "Ohhh fuck." You whimpered, your legs twitching. You truly can't recall the last time you were fucked that good, it felt wonderful. He really knows how to use that dick of his. "My God." You chuckled, turning around as your orgasm died down but all you seem was him getting dressed immediately.

"Where are you going?" "Away." "Already?" "Do I have any more reason to stay?" He didn't seem to care at all, he was so nonchalant about this entire situation. You remembered your panties being in his possession. "At least give me my underwear." You sighed, being kind of upset with how he was just planning to up and go. Did he have no heart? "Hmm." He thought for a moment. "No, I'd rather keep them, use them for later." He snickered, that turned you on a bit but his actions were nonsense.

"So what, you just fuck me and leave? What's your deal?" "My deal? I needed to fuck the bitchiness out of you, guess that didn't work." "Albert..." "My love..." He mocked you, a chuckle coming out from him as he went for the door but you stopped him once again, for the last time. "Am I able to help and see what our creation will unfold?" You asked him, pleading at this point. "You know my email, my dear." He smiled menacingly before he walked out of the office, leaving you there, naked.

[halfmoth-halfman]

Leaving this blog.

With my mini-series finishing up soon, I've decided to leave this blog as well as my AO3 account once it’s finished. This is not a decision I've made lightly, but circumstances have left this a place where I no longer feel safe.

As of now, I won't be deactivating this blog and will be leaving my fics up for anyone who'd still like to read them. I can't say this decision won't change later, but right now I feel that I've put too much work into this blog to simple delete it.

Below the cut is an explanation of why I'm making this decision, and what has been happening on this blog since the end of last year. It's not required to read or anything to understand the gist of this post; it's simply for my own peace of mind knowing that I spoke up about it. There will be topics that are possibly triggering such as harassment, threats, and racism so please mind the warnings and tags.

The mini-series is queued to finish next week, but there will be no more fic polls or wip wednesdays. I'll still be on here to make sure the queue does its job, and maybe post some stuff from my old drafts as a last bit of fun.

I'll have dms tentatively open for the next two-ish weeks for those who'd like to follow my new account, however I will not be answering anything from empty blogs. After that, asks and dms will be turned off, and I won't be coming back to this blog very often, if at all.

I cannot say thank you enough to the wonderful readers I've had and the amazing people I've met. I don't think I would've ever continued writing without your support and friendship. There's nothing I can do to show my appreciation for all of you.

Maybe we'll see each other again. If not, I hope your inspiration is always flowing, and 2024 treats you kindly.

Mothie 💜

Again, TW: rape/death threats, violent racism, repeated harassment, and mental health.

Back in November, I started getting rude, mean-spirited anons. It wasn't anything I was too bothered with because it didn't happen often and, honestly, my inbox gets flooded for a week or so anytime I post about certain topics. I blocked, deleted, reported and moved on thinking whoever it was would get bored and leave.

However, what started as a few rude anons calling me a bitch or stupid turned into a lot of anons being vile and racist which only worsened over the next few months.

I spoke about it in this post (link) near the end of November. In that post, I mentioned that those were the nicer asks and that was not an exaggeration. I have gotten my fair share of shitty anons as seen here (link) when I had to take a break from my blog because of said anons, but I have never gotten the amount of vitriol that I saw in these asks.

When I turned anon off, I started getting even worse messages from empty blogs that would either be blocked or deactivate within a week. When I turned my askbox off, I started getting hateful DMs. When I turned DMs off, it jumped from Tumblr to my other social medias which I had to private, completely avoid, or outright delete.

I got messages attacking my writing, calling me slurs, threatening to find me and rape or kill me, sending me explicit porn and rape videos while insulting my sexuality, and going into gross detail about how much people I interacted with hated me or how I would never be as good as them. I tried to power through it, pretending everything was fine while I pulled away from this blog, from writing, from friends that I loved and talked to every day. Everything about this blog, the fandoms I enjoyed, the people I talked to, made me so anxious because of these constant messages.

I took several breaks while dealing with this in therapy, repeatedly trying to come back and get comfortable on this blog, but within a few days of coming back the messages would start up again, either here or on any of my social medias I tried to unprivate, and I couldn't deal with it.

Only in the last week or two has it started to slow down and stop on a few of my other socials, which is the only reason I even feel comfortable making this post. However, in regards to this blog and my feelings toward it, the damage is done.

I don't think I can ever truly convey how isolating this has been. So many of these messages were about how I've spoken about my struggles as a black woman in fandom, how much of a burden it puts on the people who interact with me, how inferior I am to them and that I am everything that's wrong with fandom.

I felt scared and anxious to talk to anyone about this, especially people mentioned in those messages, out of fear that this harassment would jump to them. There are friendships that I stepped away from that I will never get back because of that. There are friends that I've felt like I was betraying by never telling them about what was happening because I felt too ashamed about letting this get to me.

I constantly worried that making a post like this would feel like, "Oh, Mothie's whining and trauma-dumping into the void about fandom racism again", that those messages would be right and it would force people to feel like they had to support me. Or worse, that people would agree and it would only make things worse. I've wrestled with so much guilt trying to decide to make this post and figure out what to do to make me trust myself again.

Ultimately, I don't think I was wrong for talking about my issues in fandom, and I don't think anything I've said has warranted this kind of harassment. I don’t know the who’s or why’s behind of this, but I've come to terms with the fact that I'll never really know. Truthfully, I'm not sure it even matters at this point. In the end, I think moving on from this blog entirely would be the best thing for me right now.

But, man, does it fucking suck.

This was the blog where I felt comfortable enough to start writing again, to start posting my fics. It's the blog where I met so many friends, got the courage to join new communities, found new hobbies, new music, new things to enjoy in life. It feels silly to say about a blog, but this was a place where I felt like I was able to carve out a space for myself. I put so much work into making it my own, and now the only thing I feel about it is anxious.

Hate messages and threats and racism have always been a part of fandom, and the internet as a whole. I’ve known since I started participating in fandom spaces that it was going to and continue to happen. I've known that I had to have a tough skin, especially if I ever spoke up about problems I faced because no one was going to have my back if I didn't have my own. I thought I had learned how to deal with it, and how to make a safe space for myself. But this goes beyond that. I did not deserve this. No one deserves this.

In some ways, it feels like admitting defeat, like I'm weak or hypocritical for not being as strong as I pretended I was and leaving. In other ways, it feels freeing to start over, and I'm choosing to view look at this optimistically even if it bittersweet. I don't want to let this scare me away from writing or from speaking about things that are important to me. All I can do now is say I'm so incredibly sorry to those I've hurt by stepping away or keeping this secret, and make sure I'm able to at least leave this blog on as happy a note as I can have.

[bloggingboutburgers]

Am gonna miss the kinda content you had before. I know you’re v happy and good for you! But this blog used to be a rare piece of internet haven that wasn’t about relationships and dating and marriage. Now it is. That’s obviously my problem. I get it - your blog, your life. Am just sad is all.

Sorry if my recent life news made things scary – but I assure you, I don't plan to make my stuff about dating and marriage from now on! (Relationships in itself is a tricky one, since technically "relationships" is every single type of rapport a human being can have with another imo, but I don't plan to start talking about romantic relationships either, I have no idea how those work.)

Yeah, I'm planning to get married – but not with a romantic partner, with my queerplatonic partner. Considering the nature of our relationship I myself sometimes have trouble even saying we're "dating" because it's something different (though we do call our video call "dates", I'll give ya that). But even if they're not "my whole life" in a romantic sense, I really like spending time with them, we're oceans apart so we don't get to do so very often, and during and after the pandemic, the US placed a ban on my country that made it near-impossible for me to visit them for almost 2 years, and being scared of never being able to spend time with them again broke my brain really bad, so I vowed to take measures so this never happens again. So yeah, i'm planning to get married, but it's more out of necessity, as this is seemingly the only way we could stay in the same area permanently and the only way we could counter a travel ban like that if it happens again for any reason (as only spouses or direct relatives were allowed to visit each other back then). I hate that it means doing the thing© amatonormativity and archaic socail rules seem to push people to do all the time, but international rules are a bitch like that, so we don't have many more other options.

That said – my content already included stuff I do with my partner before, and our relationship isn't changing because we're engaged – we're still never gonna have sex, and I'm still not romantically attracted to them nor have I ever been. But I do like them a lot as a queerplatonic partner, and I wanna vibe the way I show us vibing and get to do so on a daily basis, not every 6 to 9 months and breaking bank every time I do.

So... Yeah, despite the surface value of the whole thing, I don't think being engaged makes me a counter-example. If anything I guess we'll be rep for a queerplatonic relationship that involves marriage, and we'll see how that works (if our respective governments even LET us get married at all). My views on my sexual and romantic orientations haven't changed and I don't intend to change my content any time soon. I'll keep being annoying to everyone about how the world doesn't need sex and romance for a long time if people will have me, cus I have way too much of a chip on my shoulder not to.

[esmerulia-chantelle]

Deeply and Hopelessly In Love Part 1

Azul Ashengrotto x GN!Reader

Summary: You wonder about a lot of things, especially regarding Azul.

Notes: Happens at the end of Book 3 so there will be some spoilers! Also, Azul calls you sweetheart. Reader is not Yuu.

A repost from my old blog @escha-evenstar. Edited.

The sounds of abundant chatter from customers and the shuffle of footsteps from workers could be heard. It was a busy day at the Mostro Lounge. The point-card system you proposed was now being implemented and based on the large crowd inside the campus cafe, it certainly attracted a lot of students.

By reaching a certain number of points via orders, customers may redeem a free consultation with the manager — namely the one and only Azul Ashengrotto, Housewarden of Octavinelle known for his ability to make any wish or desire come true.

Who wouldn't be drawn to that kind of opportunity?

After hearing about the new promotional offer, your friends immediately placed in their orders to start collecting points which delighted Azul as he thanked them for their prompt orders. Your friends cheerily walked away to take a seat while Jade and Floyd went to where they were assigned and started to work. But you? You stayed right where you were. Azul then turned to you.

"What about you? Are you not going to order something?" He asked confusedly.

"Nope. I'm happy the place is packed but that means you'll have your work cut out for you, right? So let me help! The more hands to help, the better!" You said enthusiastically.

Azul protested, wanting for you to just relax and dine with your friends yet you insisted on helping around, showing him that bright smile of yours. You started to walk away to start taking someone's order when he suddenly held your hand and pulled you back to him, surprising you.

"Wait," Azul said, his cerulean eyes boring into your (e/c) ones. As you stared back, you took the chance to appreciate the beautiful shade of blue orbs looking at you.

"Yes?" You asked. "I still have some energy so I really don't mind helping out if that's what you're worried about. Oh! Or if it's money, you don't have to pay me back either."

"Nonsense! I can't have you work and not reimburse you," Azul retorted. He opened his mouth to continue speaking but a staff member was calling for his attention. Most probably matters related to the lounge.

"Just go. I'll be okay," you reassured him with a smile. "I've already worked here a few times before so it'll be fine. Let me help you."

Azul sighed. "You're not going to give up, are you? ...fine. But we'll talk later," he said, still speaking in a businessman-like manner, though you couldn't help but think that there was a hint of.. softness to it?

You nodded and hummed in agreement. You were about to start working but you couldn't leave yet.

You're still holding my hand. I wonder why. I wonder about a lot of things.

"Azul?" You called him softly.

Azul had a dazed look in his eyes and so you squeezed his hand once more. He then noticed he was still holding onto your hand. "Ah! Right, of course," he said before reluctantly letting go and clearing his throat. "Ehem. My apologies." You could see tinge of pink on his cheeks.

"It's alright. Don't worry," you giggled.

The two of you then set off to do some work. Fast forward the time and now Mostro Lounge is finally closed. After the last customers have left, you felt the tiredness seeping in. You sat down on the nearest couch and let out a sigh of relief, closing your eyes to rest. Your friends have already left together with your dorm mates, Yuu and Grim, who were called in by Headmage Crowley for whatever reason, unfortunately. You were thinking about today's events when a smooth, calm voice rang in your ears.

"I see the day has worn you out," someone said. Your eyes sprang open in surprise.

It was Azul. Still looking as handsome as always with that crisp dorm uniform. His confident aura that commands such power. Those lips that curve into a teasing smile. And the eyes. Oh, those ocean-hued eyes! You could stare at them all day long.

You're so charming. I find a lot of things about you attractive. I wonder.. what do you think of me? Am I attractive too?

It's only been a few hours but you honestly missed him already. Although you saw him while serving customers with their orders, stolen glances and subtle smiles were sadly not enough for you who craved his presence.

I wonder.. Did you miss me? I missed you. I'm sorry if I'm clingy. I just like being with you.

You couldn't muster a reply, too busy and lost in your thoughts as you stared at him.

Azul spoke again. "Too tired to even answer me, sweetheart?" He teased.

You blushed at his words. Particularly, that one word. Azul only addresses you by that nickname when the two of you are alone, or out of earshot from others. Even though he's been calling you that for some time now, you still blush every time he calls you by that term. He seemed to take delight in making your face flush pink. If only it meant more than just a teasing from a friend.

You let out a chuckle, trying to hide that feeling in your chest and ignoring the heat on your face. "Ehehe~ I guess I am feeling a bit tired. I've never seen the lounge have that many customers before."

"This is good news, of course," Azul exclaimed. "We made three times our usual profit. All in but a day's work! Your suggestion has definitely made Mostro Lounge even more successful. Now, shall we continue our conversation from earlier?"

You and Azul were now seated side by side on a comfortable leather couch inside a different room. Lots of books were propped on bookshelves and his desk was neatly piled with contracts and other paperworks. Behind his desk stood the entrance to his private vault. Soft, wavering lights from the aquarium gleamed across the room. This was Azul's office, also known as the VIP Room. You've been here a number of times before so it provided a sense of familiarity and tranquility to you. This place was also witness to some small but special moments you had with the cecaelia.

I wonder.. Did you think those moments were special too?

As you were reliving some memories, Azul's voice pulled you out of your trance as he offered you some tea. You thanked him and sipped on the warm beverage, he discussed what he was offering in exchange for the work you did for the lounge. You reasoned out that he didn't have to but Azul insisted that he give something back to you in return. In the end, you just accepted his "payment". Seeing as he's still in the give-and-take mindset.

You then enjoyed a scrumptious meal together with Azul and the Leech brothers. It was a delightful dinner, to be honest. Although most people probably thought the trio to be.. Suspicious? Shady? Terrifying, even? They could also be very nice and fun to be with. You enjoyed their company.

After finishing, you decided it was time to leave since it was starting to get late. You bid them your thanks and farewell. "I'll see you guys tomorrow! Goodnight!"

You were now heading back to Ramshackle Dorm. The peace of the night made you recall today's memories. The trip to the museum. Your heart-to-heart talk with Azul. Helping out at the lounge. Dinner with friends. It was really a nice day, and as you strolled along the path, your mind couldn't help but think. You did wonder a lot, after all.

I wonder.. do you feel the same way as I do?

Part 2 here! Masterlist here!

If you enjoyed this: likes, comments, and reblogs are much appreciated. Thank you for reading!

[lych33dragoncookie]

alright so the main reason i wanted to make this blog; those new Wind Archer trailers.

I already had a lot to say about the first one, for... One big reason.

The fact we're going to the laboratorium is pretty exciting, but I did not expect for us to already catch a glimpse of the Ultimate Cookie. In fact, I had almost forgotten about that; I thought Matcha making MyCookie was more of a byproduct of the Beast cookies needing bodies to inhabit, but...

Well, I guess Dark Enchantress's original ambitions haven't left her. And she's really, really close to realizing her dreams; the dreams she carries on from White Lily Cookie.

It really makes me wonder how White Lily would react to these developments. To see her dreams realized, every bit as horrifying as she most likely knew they'd be, carried on by a part of herself. I really, really wanna see where they go with this.

On another note...

sorry, i just much prefer his Japanese VA HE'S BAAAAAAAACKKKKK~

You have... No idea how frustrated I was to see that the first Beast cookie to release was Mystic Flour and not him. And while it's not guaranteed we'll get him this time, either (even if i really hope we do)... Come on, it's just nice to have him back. He's a really, really fun antagonist. Sometimes, when all your antagonists have complex motives, believing that despite everything they've done, ultimately they're the ones in the right (with even Dark Enchantress only committing as much harm as she has as a response to the revelation that the world, on a fundamental level, was seemingly much more cruel, uncaring and pointless than she had ever thought; a desperate need to make a difference, no matter how many lives and pain it takes), it's incredibly nice to have that one villain, that one villain who doesn't try to find an excuse for what they do, having fun, not believing that they're doing everything that they do for some greater motive, but just to have fun, to make the entire world one big, brightly burning play area for them to toy with as long as they want, however they want. I love Shadow Milk, because he perfectly offsets the usual monologuing, self-righteous villainy we tend to see (And often enjoy, don't get me wrong, both Dark Enchantress and Mystic Flour have grown one me) with just pure, uncaring, show-stopping villainy for the sake of villainy.

He's manipulative, playful, silly, over the top, more concerned with putting on a show first and foremost than actually accomplishing his objectives; because you and I both know that he knows that he could probably just brute force his way into getting his soul jam back, into taking down the heroes without any opportunity for them to do anything about it. If he wanted to, he could very, very easily create an unwinnable scenario. But he doesn't. Because that's no fun.

And I absolutely adore him for it. Every single scene he's in is an absolute delight.

... Right, uh. Wind Archer.

I'm excited for him! It's been a while since we've gotten any Ovenbreak legendaries, and with Wind Archer in the game, it means we're likely very close to seeing Fire Spirit and Millennial Tree (Both pretty big faves for me, though Millie is the one that does unholy things to my brain just from looking at him). And honestly, this feels like a really, really good use for him! No beating around the bush, no overcomplicating anything, just going straight to the point and trying to stop the current threat at its root. He's going to fail, obviously. Even if he takes out the ultimate cookie, chances are it can just be rebuilt, and the beasts on an individual level would be way too much for him to handle. And with Shadow Milk having awoken... Yeah, he stands just about no chance. But, it will be very fun to see, methinks. It's also just a pretty natural fit; a protector of nature that hunts down anything that may disturb or corrupt said nature being sent to strike down what's pretty much a threat that's entirely artificial, unnatural, bodies made through forbidden, arcane magic and ethically dubious means, stumbling upon the culmination of someone's ambitions to create perfect life by artificial means. It works out really, really well, methinks.

But yeah that's my thoughts so far on the 2 Wind Archer update trailers, I'm actually really excited for where they're gonna take this, we've actually got some good plot progression going on and a lot of interesting writing ideas that while I don't fully trust the devs to execute perfectly, I do still really like and feel pretty hopeful for!

... Now just give me Shadow Milk and Millennial Tree and my life is yours. And Lychee, maybe. That one might take a bit. how are they even gonna do Longan in Kingdom. that's... quite a lot to try to adapt without either rehashing content or completely hijacking the plot. god i hope this doesn't mean they'll just stop at Lotus. I miss my dragons. Except not really because OB has been doing some good stuff with them.

Sorry for the really long post, but I wanted to dump some thoughts and have a sort of primer for the kinda stuff I wanna make for this blog.

Oh, and expect some shitposts along the way, too.

[blinkysrewatchparty]

Welcome to Blinky's Rewatch Party!

Hello Nighthawks, Sniggles, and Latte Hattes! You've found the official tumblr page for Blinky's Rewatch Party--where we organize semi-regular watch parties of Nightmare Time 2 episodes as part of our campaign to both share our love of NMT and hopefully get our grubby little hands on Nightmare Time 3!

Current Rewatch Party Planning Polls: None Currently Active!

FAQ with all the basic info under the cut!

WHEN ARE THE REWATCH PARTIES?

The Rewatch Parties are every other Saturday, at two different times, so that as many people as possible can participate directly! The schedule for the current round of Rewatch Parties is:

HOW CAN I PARTICIPATE?

Here on Tumblr, we will be using the tag "Blinky's Rewatch Party." You can use the tag to liveblog your rewatch, or wait until the story is over to post any and all thoughts at once. If you can't make either of the chosen times, that's okay! The tag's not going anywhere; simply watch and post your thoughts whenever you can. And remember to check out the tag to see what other people are saying!

If the Tumblr tagging system isn't your ideal communal watching experience, that's cool too. We're set up on several other social media platforms that you are welcome to check out!

Also you can follow this blog! It's not super necessary, but it will make keeping up with any updates easier. Also, likes and ESPECIALLY reblogs of any and all posts are greatly appreciated--I don't really care about notes for notes' sake, but since the whole point is to keep people watching Nightmare Time, I'd love for the parties to reach as many people as possible!

WHAT OTHER SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORMS? HOW DO I FIND YOU THERE?

We'll be hosting the watch parties here on Tumblr, but also on Discord, YouTube, and Twitter.

Our discord is currently invite only! DM this account if you're interested in joining and we'll see what we can do. The server is super chill and fun and there's a surprising amount of discussion and theorizing about Chumby.

We don't have a specific YouTube page (yet!)--we'll simply be hosting the watch parties in the comments sections of the Nightmare Time episodes themselves. This will have the added bonus of really showing increased interest in NMT, and getting us one step closer to our ultimate goal: MORE HATCHETFIELD!

The link to our twitter is here: https://twitter.com/BlinkysParty. We will be using the hashtag #BlinkysRewatchParty.

For more information on participating in the Rewatch Parties on various social medias, go here.

WHO RUNS THE WATCH PARTIES?

That would be me! Hello! My name is Brooke (she/her), and you may know me on here as @man-down-in-hatchet-town. I want these watch parties to be as positive an experience as possible, so please feel free to reach out to me on this page OR man-down with any thoughts, questions, or concerns. Unlike Hidgens, I promise I won't show you my résumé!

Our discord is also largely managed by the amazing @abarryswiftexit! They are super cool and friendly and the real hero of this whole endeavor.

YOUR ART IS SO COOL! WHO MADE IT?

I'm so glad you asked! Our awesome text graphics and unbelievable avatar are all by my wonderful fandom best buddy @its-short-for-jackalope. Seriously, guys, their art is so good and interesting, so be sure to check it all out and give his page a follow!

Thanks, Jack! 💜

AND THE BIG ONE: WHAT HAPPENED IN 2005 TO MAKE THE HATCHETFIELD TIMELINE SPLIT?

I actually don't know this one (though I have lots of thoughts and ideas, help)! But I do know that rewatching Nightmare Time will help us get the chance to find out. So let's get our Bliklotep on and do this thing!

[oboy-me]

NSFW prompt for ur consideration: The Demon Brothers' first time with a he/him transmasc!MC? You can pick which brothers you wanna do if u don't feel like writing all of em!

Ooooh what a fantastic request, and the first saucy prompt for the blog! This will presume the MC's had his top surgery but hasn't gotten around to the bottom surgery yet (either due to just time, money, or maybe has been looking around in the Devildom now instead of the human realm for a good way to do it, etc..)

——————————————————————————————————————

▸▸ You have him all riled up, either by accident or on purpose; either way it happened, you find his hunger to consume your love growing more and more needy until it comes time to remove the clothing barring his eyes from beholding you in your purest form. Your hesitation speaks volumes and his heels cool a bit to see what's bothering you, to make sure you're comfortable above all else.

——————————————————————————————————————

Lucifer already had a suspicion what this was about. He's read your file, gathered information on you; he knew you hadn't yet fully transitioned in the physical sense. So when your hand grabs his wrist lightly to stop him from undoing your shirt buttons, he immediately had a clue what was happening. He ceased what he was doing and leaned in to press a loving kiss to your forehead. "Are you concerned with what I will think? That it is your first time in such an intimate situation, with a body you have not quite come to terms with yet?" he'd mutter into your ear; though his tone had kept that silky smooth flit that made your spine shudder in anticipation, you could also hear the soft consideration behind it echoing his desire to make you more comfortable. You nod a little, and he just smirked in response at first.

"Do you really believe I would judge such a good boy on frivolous details?" His playful-yet-genuine words made your heart skip a beat. How did he always seem to know just what to say? "When I fell in love with you, I fell in love with you for more than just your body — it was your spirit, your heart that drew me in first. How it is presented to me matters very little beyond presenting me another way to please you." Another kiss of his graced your temple then, and you could feel how those lips were pulled in to a smile.

"I won't rush you, however. I know plenty of ways to bring you to your climax without moving a single inch of clothing aside... So tonight I'll treat you to something special, and if you're an obedient boy, I may even let you take in a rare sight indeed... Make sure I can hear you, or I might just punish you instead..."

Mammon initially gets a bit flustered when you grabbed for his hand — he thought maybe he'd been a bit too eager and crossed over into aggressiveness when he practically tore the bottom of your shirt out from under your belt. It takes a lot of stuttered words to convince him it's not anything to do with him, you're just nervous about how you look to him, on top of it being your first time ever having sex like this. There's a moment of short-circuiting from Mammon who just looks at you dumbfounded and you're nearly certain you already messed it up, until...

"Wha? My absolutely handsome human, lookin' bad? Tch! As if! Did'ja forget I got an eye for sexiness? That's right! And The Great Mammon ain't gonna let anythin' but the sexiest hang off his arm, so you best believe I'm madly in love with ya inside and out!" Him calling you handsome and sexy made sure it was your turn to get flustered, and he made sure to move and gentle straddle over your belly while you were still trying to process what he'd just said. The way he leaned back gave you an absolute mouthwatering eyeful of his toned body, and following it up showed his lopsided grin flashing his fangs down at you.

"No need 'ta rush, right? We'll just work ya up until you're feelin' ready, so instead of focusin' on any of that right now, why don't we see how good that sweet little mouth of yours is? You've always got a way with your words, so why don't'ya show me how you work that tongue in other ways if you want? Or I can just put on a private modelin' show for your eyes only — the thought of havin' my handsome boyfriend starin' me down like that's already gettin' me all sorts of riled up...

Leviathan ended up riled up after a fair bit of teasing him and once there was a mutual approval to let things get much more intimate past the touches and kisses he was the first one mostly out of his clothes. He only stopped when he realized you probably shouldn't just be left in yours too and had thought to try a slick move he watched in a hentai "educational anime series" by letting the tip of his tail slither up your back and around your neck, exploring down in to your shirt. He only got to the tips of your collarbone before you yelped for him to wait, and to say he looked guilty would be an understatement.

Poor Levi's immediately apologizing, swearing up and down he's just some filthy pervert of an otaku for ever trying to make the first move, and it takes a moment to calm him down and reassure the demon that it's not him at all, it's about the fact it's your first time and how you feel about your own body. Cue a few more moments before something dings in his head and he turns to go find a box that had been hidden in a rather inconspicuous spot — and from that box you see a flash of what looked like a very specific belt-like accessory, meant to hold a very familiar toy. His face is beet red as he seems unable to show the strap-on in full, but he seemed rather excited for the prospect.

"Th-That-- That's totally fine! I... I went out and watched some anime that h-had some protagonists like you, uhm... a-and I... I ord- ordered some stuff in advance... I figured y-y-you'd be worried... bu-but I promise I'll like it! I even tried it out on myself first! ... I-I mean, gah! I'm no-not f-f-forcing you to do this to me though okay?! I just... uhm... I'm really t-turned on by the thought of being topped by my hot human boyfriend, no matter how we do it!!"

Satan already had been teasing you with being relatively hands-off, utilizing his words and ghosting touches to get you hot and bothered; the way he muttered near your ear and let his breath wash down across your neck was but a small part of the myriad of ways he worked you up without ever letting a finger lay upon your body. You thought he'd be content with this alone but when you found one of his hands nearing your shirt you asked him to pause for a moment. You felt the need to tell him it was your first time, and on top of that you were unsure what he would think of how you looked. The way he paused to think made you nervous that you might have spoken out of line, but the smile he wore said differently.

"I've been alive for a couple centuries now and have seen a lot of things; if you think I will mind that your body does or doesn't have certain traits, then let me remind you..." You yelp softly when you feel his fingers trace the underside of your jaw, gasping when he finally graced the side of your neck with his lips. It was surprisingly sensual, thoughtful, careful; his free hand had grasped at your thigh only to then drag upwards with a light curl to his digits to pull the fabric of your clothing with them.

"I love you, Y/N. Everything about you, even as you are now, even as you will be in the future. Even if you don't trust yourself... trust in my words, in my touch, in my love. I could write a book a day for centuries filled to the brim with words of affection and adoration for you, and that still would only be but a droplet in the ocean that has welled up in my heart. You will always be the handsome human I am honored to call mine."

Asmodeus is no stranger to affairs of the body, both the good and the bad. Even when you got him all hot and bothered and ready to pounce on you, he could tell you were nervous by the way you hesitated at times. That cat-like grin remained on his lips as he crawled over top of you, letting his honey-pink eyes watch yours closely — but not to induce any magic upon you. You could tell he gazed at you sincerely, sweetly, wanting no question of his feelings to remain as he adjusted on his elbows to let his hands cradle the sides of your face with dancing fingertips.

"Oh hon, I know that look so well," he cooed quietly, his perfectly painted lips pulled in to his prettiest, most genuine smile. "That's the look of a young man who's still unsure of himself, isn't it? You know, I had that very same look once upon a time." Surely he must have seen the shock on your face because he'd follow that up with a giggling laugh. "Surprised? It's not just humans that often feel wrong in their bodies! We demons just have a much easier time making the changes we want. That's why I totally get it, my absolutely gorgeous boy. ♥ "

"I would never offer my body to just any old someone, Y/N~ That someone's gotta be drop-dead gorgeous, in a league anywhere near me, and I can confidently say that you're just that! In fact... You're the only person I've ever wanted to chase that wasn't just myself. If you were scared of how you looked... You've got my mark of approval — and I'll put that mark right in the most scandalous places, just for you...~ ♥♥♥ "

Beelzebub, despite being someone who seems unconcerned with most details not related to food, always takes your comfort very, very seriously. So seriously in fact that even when you were pulled up to straddle his chest as you both made out, he could see you weren't daring to put your full weight down and immediately stopped what you both were doing. He started to ask you if you were hurt, if he'd somehow pulled your legs too hard; it took a few tries of guessing before you finally blurted out that you're both a virgin and nervous about what he'd think of your appearance.

You can see the head empty stare he's got. "But... why does that matter?" He asked it sincerely, but realized he worded it poorly so he tried again. "What I mean is... would I be here showering you with love if I didn't like how you looked, or thought any less of you for this being your first time? If anything... I'm even more excited than ever. It's really special for humans to have their first time, right? So the fact you chose me... It makes me feel really good." Every inch of your body flushed hot as he picked you up effortlessly and sat you down on the bed next to him, his sweet eyes focused on you from below.

"But we don't have to rush at all. Like a gourmet dish, you've gotta go slow and savor it to really enjoy it. As much as I just want to drink up all your love, it wont taste the same if I sour it from pushing you. So we'll go at your own pace. Are you still up for anything? If you are, just let me know what you're comfortable with. If not, that's okay; we can go grab some dinner together instead."

Belphegor couldn't care less, but this meant that he didn't really look at you in any binary sense; even as you shared your transitional journey with him, he stayed supportive of you, unbothered by the changes because all he was looking at was you. Not a constantly-changing body, not some arbitrary label, but you as a whole. This couldn't be any more obvious than it was as you two lay intwined in bed, Belphegor leaving sloppy kisses down your jaw and neck, his hands bold as they groped at your posterior enough to arc in to his body. You only barely muttered out a plea to wait a moment, which he gave to hear you out. When you told him what bothered you, he threw you a quizzical look.

"Y/N, you're so caught up in what others think of you," he remarked earnestly as he trailed his finger up and down your spine. "But how do you feel? Not "what do I think Belphie wants to hear," but "what is my heart telling me?" Then listen to that voice." Belphegor always had a way of stunning you silent, and he could tell he had a profound effect on you. His lips would graze the outside of your ear, the trail left in its wake warm for a few moments before it felt like an icy chill across your hot skin.

"Besides. You shouldn't be thinking about anyone but me. You belong to me, and you know I'll always love you no matter what happens... Even if you changed your body little bits at a time every day for the rest of your life, all that would mean is I get new things to love about you. So come a little closer... Let me indulge you in how good I can make you feel, and let me show you just how much I've fallen for you..."

WHEW goodness, more suggestive than outright NSFW mostly, but I hope you like it regardless anon! As a confession, despite being transmasc myself I've never actually sat down and written proper transmasc smut, so that's part of why I was a bit shy on the more sexual nature of things. But still, I do hope I did alright! if you need me to go back and do another take please let me know! 💖

[thoughts-on-bangtan]

A Little Farewell

With about a week left to go we had our final OT4 weverse live today and it's safe to say, we were not prepared. But I'm very grateful that they did a live all together giving us a last dose of chaos, cuteness and giggles before we'll be left to fend for ourselves for 6 months before Jin returns to us in June 2024.

The live truly was a beautiful gift that kept on giving starting with Tae's new short haircut and JK hiding his now shaved head from us, Namjoon even claiming that JKs hair is shorter than his own (JK supposedly felt inspired to shave his head a little early after he met Usher, who has pretty short hair himself, and went for it), and Jimin practically getting offended by a comment saying they wanted to see him with a buzzcut. To be honest Tae's cute little haircut looks a little like he did it himself in the dead of the night but it also makes him look like we traveled back in time to 2013 or earlier. Adorable. After so long it was really nice to see them together again, and to generally have more than one Tannie in a live together.

Since the first leaks about their military service appeared a few days ago we've seen vminies talk among themselves, and not to mention the near constant fighting that's been going on between the two xkook camps, but seeing vmin being so cute together in this live, it felt reassuring. Whatever questions or worries we might've had, they were washed away. In a way it makes sense that Tae and Jimin didn't go together, even if we all would've loved to see them go together and make use of the buddy system, but that isn't the choice they made for themselves and that's okay. It's easy to see what vmin are doing more than just fine and that's all that matters. Admin 2 really hoped we'd get a vmin handshake or hand holding, and we got two! I mean, look at all this cuteness:

And then also Tae going home in five minutes flat and doing a small solo live which was basically just him being adorable and talking to Jimin, who was immediately in the comments, before leaving again. Love when we get to third wheel them, wow, I truly will miss that a lot.

At one point in the live JK mentioned that he'd wanted to go to the special forces as well, implying that for some reason he couldn't, which makes me wonder why. Was it because of his tattoos? Either way, it's nice that he'll instead get to go with Jimin and supposedly they'll be in the training camp where Seokjin is one of the trainers so that's cute.

Speaking of Seokjin, after so long it was adorable how often Namjoon brought up Seokjin in this live. Just Jin hyung this and Jin hyung that, very cute. And they also mentioned Hobi a bunch, how he's gotten cooler and more manly, which comes as a great reminder to basically all of us that the cute boys we've known until now, well, they'll probably fade away and get replaced by more mature versions of our beloved members in the next months and they'll return to us as a different set of Tannies. And that's okay. They're grown up men so it makes sense that eventually some of that aegyo cuteness will fade away and personally I'm very curious to see how things will turn out and what they'll be like in 2025.

And I'm very curious to see if idiots will respect Namjoon's and Tae's pleas for people not to show up for their entrance ceremonies. Especially since Namjoon asked for it in three languages to make sure everyone understood it. Unfortunately I have my doubts, since we know the maknae line have some of the most unhinged solos but here's hoping.

Now, what does this mean for us now? Well, it'll be quite a while until we'll see the members slowly returning one after the other so we'd like to take this time for a 'official' hiatus as well. Admin 2 is considering a temporary "rebrand" into a BL blog since they've gotten into Thai BLs in the last year, so that's something that might happen. Would any of you be interested in something like that?

But we'll still be ARMY, still love vmin and namjin, and once the guys will return, so will we, so don't worry, we're not leaving BTS any time soon.

Lastly, here's a blurry screenshot of a coconut headed JK running across the screen screaming THIS WAS BTS. A beautifully chaotic ending to this solo era. Let's see what the next months will bring us and what 2025 will be like when chapter 2 will come to a close and a new chapter of BTS and ARMY will open, eventually.

Thank you so much for reading!

[gonzo-rella]

Headcanons: Being Nonbinary in the Study Group

MASTERLIST | AO3 | KO-FI

Pride Month 2024 #9

Relationship(s): Abed Nadir x nonbinary!reader (platonic), Annie Edison x nonbinary!reader (platonic), Britta Perry x nonbinary!reader (platonic), Jeff Winger x nonbinary!reader (platonic), Pierce Hawthorne x nonbinary!reader (platonic), Shirley Bennett x nonbinary!reader (platonic), Troy Barnes x nonbinary!reader.

Warnings: References to mild trans/enbyphobia. (Let me know if I need to add any)

(A/N: This is an idea I've had since long before Pride Month, but somehow it's the penultimate Pride Month fic I've posted. I've started a (slow) Community rewatch for the first time in at least a year, so hopefully that will motivate me to get back into writing for the show. I mean, this blog started out as a Community reader-insert fic blog, so who would I be if I stopped writing for it? I think I got a bit burnt out writing for it so much, but I'm ready to write more for it again. I'm hoping to get through some of the really old Community requests on my to-do list by the end of the year- we'll see! And, if you want to make a request for Community, with a nonbinary!reader or not, feel free to send one in.)

Annie and Abed are definitely the ones who find it the easiest to gender you correctly.

With Abed especially, he doesn’t treat it as a big deal, and he’s for sure the most understanding of it in the group.

Annie might be a bit awkward and ask questions of varying levels of appropriateness.

If you wear a pronoun pin or express a desire to get one, Annie will buy you matching pins in the same style.

Abed wants to be a good friend to you, so he’ll ask you outright if he’s not sure about something.

Jeff might not completely understand, but he finds most things easy, including getting your name/pronouns/etc. right.

He doesn’t bother asking you any questions; he figures everything out for himself.

Like Abed, he’s pretty good at not making your gender a big deal.

Britta will 100% be your biggest advocate.

She will always correct people if they get things wrong (even if you tell her she doesn't have to).

(If she ever accidentally misgenders you, Jeff will smugly correct her)

She will argue with Pierce if he’s a dick to you (more on him in a second).

And, if you run into any issues at Greendale, she will fight tooth and nail for you.

Troy gives off 'his pronouns are 'they/them'' energy.

He thinks that nonbinary people are cool as fuck.

He has a baseline understanding of it.

Like Annie, he asks you a lot of questions (also of varying levels of appropriateness).

A lot of his questions are outright bizarre compared to hers.

(‘Where does your gender fluid come from?’, for example)

Shirley doesn’t get the whole nonbinary thing (at first at least), but she will try her absolute best to show you respect and kindness.

And, despite her lack of understanding, she will stand up for you in a very motherly way.

(She will bring an eager Britta and a reluctant Jeff as her reinforcements)

I’m not sure where I stand with Pierce.

I can see him constantly making bottom of the barrel jokes about your gender that no one finds funny, and will either doubledown or backtrack with a defensive ‘what, can you say anything these days?’

But, I think with all the spiritual stuff he’s into, he might be comically understanding and accepting of nonbinary people. 

(It’s comical considering how bigoted/prejudiced or at the very least insensitive he is about race, gender etc.)

Maybe he’s a mixture of both of those things?

Either way, I can see him confidently making the dumbest and wildest claims about nonbinary people.

(Troy may or may not believe half of them and ask you to confirm)

And, on the rare occasion he says something right about nonbinary people, you’ll shamefully have to admit it.

As the years go on, it’s rare that any of them thinks much about your gender.

Even the ones who don’t understand it will get used to using your pronouns and gendering you correctly.

Everyone in the Study Group would, despite their varying levels of understanding, show as much respect to you as they do one another.

No matter your gender, you’re one of them, and that’s all that matters.

[incorrectgenv]

Hey guys!!

Just wanted to say thanks to everyone who's interacted and followed my posts. I really did just make this blog on a whim, especially after not seeing much Gen V stuff going around, so it's nice to see people are enjoying it.

Given everything that's going on, it's looks like we're not gonna get much more any time soon (for very valid reasons) so I'm gonna try to step up my game a bit.

Gonna keep going with the consistent 2 posts a day for incorrect quotes, I have a lot backed up and ready to go. I'm also gonna start seeing if I can make some in-character social post edits. Never tried it before, so we'll see how that goes!!

If you guys have any post suggestions, edits, templates, scenarios, characters you'd like to see included or anything like that that you'd like to see, I'll have my dms open so you can submit things that way!!

(keep it appropriate. Think, show rating wise. Innuendos and other mild things are fine. Anything too explicit will either come with a warning or not be posted. At my discretion. Thank you.)

Hope you all have a good day 🤟

(I love them ❤️💙)

[dearweirdme]

Is there you Rain, or anyone here who can talk about 2018 at length. I'm kinda new to taekookery and doesn't understand 2018-2019 period. That whole set up and disghuising or hiding Taehyung when Jungkook got sick. What was that? Didn't army find it weird? It's not even taekookers randomly linking things. It's open if you wanna see it. And I don't know if it is 2018 or 19 but taekook interaction on concert became less. A lot of things they used to do with each other was either given to do with Jmn or Jin. And it's not only about both.

2017 Taehyung attracted lot of attention and suddenly in 2018 you see him all the members equally (well except Jungkook) and this weird narrative that started in 2017 about Taehyung being too rude and disinterested in group escalated. You think along with Taekook Bighit had a major 🦴 to pick with Taehyung. Like he was getting too much attention. I can't forget how he cried on stage. That's the first time I've seen him so overwhelmed.

I don't know how true is this but I've read this somewhere. BH doesn't fear too much that Taehyung will leave the group but he will take Jungkook with him. I think it's correct to an extent. I don't mean it by saying Taehyung is any less than Jungkook. Just two people leaving would be a huge blowout for the company especially when one of them is main singer and one of the main dancer.

My thoughts are scattered. If you have any comments on this, I would appreciate listening to your thoughts or anyone who can expand and simplify this.

Hi anon!

I can't really speak in depth about 2018/2019, because I wasn't around then. If anyone has experiences or takes on this to share please do! I also think Kayla's blog is a great source to visit, because it gives a great chronological recounting of events @taekooktimeline , but you probably already found her.

In general I feel the separating began before 2018. I think when it became clear to the company that Jk and Tae were a couple they likely made rules and boundaries for them to adhere to. Tae and Jk were probably told not to be too close on camera (which must've been real hard in practice, because they would have had to find a balance between too close and not too awkward). So I think they themselves tried to hide their relationship. Aside from that, staff would also have had instructions on how to deal with them. WHich resulted into things like Tae not being with Jk when he was sick. Peoples minds work black and white sometimes, so I think for the people involved some situations would have been easier to detect as 'risky' than others. When Jk got sick for instance.. that clicks as an important moment and they would know not to have Tae too close. On other stuff though.. such as a Run episode.. we'll see Tae and Jk super close just becasue those times it wouldn't have clicked as a risky moment perse.

On your thoughts about BH not minding Tae leaving... I don't really agree. Tae has a huge fanbase and is amongst the most popluar members.. if not the most popular at times. Even though he doesn't get the most singing opportunities out of all members, I think his voice is really important to BTS's sound and aside from Jk I think his vocal skills are the strongest (not hate to any members, just stating my perception). Tae is also a great performer and a great dancer. They make such use of him as a visual. Aside from that, losing a member is a scandal amongst kpop groups.. it would've refelcted badly on Bh and BTS. I think.. had Tae not been as valuable as he is.. they would've kicked him to the side when they discovered Tae and Jk were more than friends. Though they treat him like shit, I don't think BH want's Tae to go at all.