#we’re not talking about the fact I’m still awake

[toxicrevolver]

wait that is yoongi right

i thought it was jooyeon for a good minute

Bruh why is tumblr so stupid. I never saw the notif for this.

Have all of the pics of El Capitxn I have saved as apology.

[pathologicalreid]

heart to heart | s.r.

in which hotchner!reader is set to have heart surgery, and Spencer can't help but be concerned for her

margotober masterlist

who? spencer reid x hotchner!reader category: angst content warnings: fem!reader, chronically ill!reader, spencer is anxious, inadvertently made jack hotchner a glass child, hospitals, medications, surgery, heart transplant, hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, mostly medically accurate, rejected proposals, spencer's pov, mentions death and dying and wills, howl's moving castle word count: 2.51k a/n: this might be my favorite margotober post of the week. i don't know. it's very introspective. twas a request!

Ironically, his heart was racing. Spencer made his way through the cardiac unit with nothing but his imagination to guide him. He had just left the building a few hours ago when you insisted that he sleep in a real bed, and now he was back.

Your dad hadn’t told him what was going on, he just told him to get to the hospital. It was an hour’s drive from his place in D.C. to Johns Hopkins in Baltimore—you could already be dead by now.

He didn’t even have a chance to say goodbye to you. Not a real, proper goodbye. He told you he’d come back in the morning, which felt ridiculous now.

The sterile fluorescence of the intensive care unit only added to his irritability as he washed his hands upon entry, the CVICU had been your home for the past two months, and in a way, it had become Spencer’s as well. He couldn’t be shocked, you’d been in heart failure for nearly two years, and there was no way he could ignore the worried glances between your doctors and nurses.

You slept more than you were awake most days, Spencer and your dad took turns staying behind on cases, and you usually didn’t have the energy to hold a conversation.

That’s why he’s so surprised to see you sitting up in bed with a cap over your hair, talking to your cardiologist. You looked drained, dark circles gave your eyes a haunted look, but Spencer’s chest filled with relief at the fact that you were still very much alive. “Hey,” Spencer said, looking around the room for even the slightest clue as to what was going on.

Sluggishly, your head turned to look at him, “Hey,” you said back, a weak smile on your face.

He wanted to tell you to lie down, sitting up was obviously draining you of what little energy you had, but more than that, he wanted you to tell him what was going on—he couldn’t guess, he couldn’t bear to be wrong. “What is it? What happened?” His questions were frantic, your father had never called him in the middle of the night like this.

“I’m getting a heart, Spence,” you told him, your voice was gentle.

So, the sky wasn’t falling. The feeling of impending doom that he’s had for the last two years was potentially going to be lifted away, “When?” He asked, stepping further into the room and setting his bag in the chair, crossing his arms as he joined the conversation between you and your doctor.

You took a deep breath, in through your nose and out through your mouth, “Tonight.”

He needed to sit down.

“We’re just waiting on some final pre-op labs,” your doctor confirmed, nodding at the both of you. “It’s a good match,” he assured Spencer, “I’ll let you two talk.”

As soon as you were alone, Spencer guided you down to the pillows. Too weak to resist, you leaned back until your shoulders hit the pillows, “Where’s Hotch?”

You hummed in response, “Jack freaked out when we told him I was getting a new heart, dad’s with him until our aunt gets here.”

“He’s worried about you,” he observed, sometimes it was hard to put the age difference between you and your brother into perspective, but at times like this, he remembered just how young Jack really was.

Clearing your throat, you shook your head once, “He’s scared that my new heart won’t love him the same.”

Spencer nodded in understanding, “So, what did you tell him?”

You smiled softly, “I told him it was like in Howl’s Moving Castle.” Pausing for a moment to catch your breath, Spencer took your hand in his, “They’re not taking my love away, I’ll be able to love him even more with a new heart.”

“So, now he thinks your heart is on fire,” Spencer pointed out, tucking a stray hair underneath your cap.

Sighing, you shut your eyes for a moment, “Sometimes it feels like it.”

His chest tightened in sympathy while watching you try to catch your breath, vaguely aware that this was the last night that tonight would be like this, “Are you scared?” It seemed like a foolish question to ask, knowing that you’d had more procedures than most people your age, but this was a big one. This was the big one.

You nodded gently, there were so many things to be scared of, surgical complications, transplant rejection, but you looked at Spencer with pity in your eyes. You were pitying him, “My will is in the top drawer of my nightstand,” you started.

“No,” Spencer interjected, denial creeping up on him.

You sighed, it took everything in you to hold back your tears, “Spence, we have to talk about this.”

He shook his head, “No, we don’t. You’re going to be fine.”

“I need you to be rational,” you pleaded. The irony of the situation was not lost on him, you were begging him to think rationally as refusal crept over him. “You know the statistics. In fact, you probably know them better than me,” you said pointedly.

He sniffled, “You have good odds,” he insisted. “Even if you didn’t have good chances, you’ve always been good at beating the odds,” he reminded you. The two of you had said goodbye before, a nasty battle with bacterial endocarditis had put you in a coma, but you had come out of it, sending you even higher on the UNOS transplant list.

Issues with your kidneys had knocked you out of the running for some hearts, so your only hope was a direct donation. It seemed like you were getting your wish. “My heart won’t be as big,” you murmured, not having the energy to debate Spencer on probability.

“No,” he affirmed, “It’ll be a bit smaller.” Your heart muscle was thick as a result of your cardiomyopathy, and your pacemaker wasn’t able to keep up with your deteriorating health. A transplant became your only hope.

You sighed contentedly, “You always made me feel so lucky.”

“Stop trying to say goodbye,” he told you, tilting his head to the side.

Nodding, he could tell that you understood him, “You’ll never get rid of me, I’ll come back and haunt you.”

Spencer shook his head dismissively, “No dying, sweet girl. We’ve got to take care of your new heart.”

A peaceful silence blanketed the two of you, sitting and waiting for someone to tell him it was time to go. He didn’t want to go. He’d go with you to the operating room if they’d let him.

He said goodbye to you in the hallway, watching you get wheeled away before shoving his hands in his pockets and walking to the waiting room, stopping in his tracks at the sight before him.

A majority of the BAU had gathered in the waiting room, taking up all of the chairs on the right-hand side, settling in for the long haul. “Hey,” JJ was the first one to speak, giving Spencer a quick embrace before stepping back, “How was she?”

“She’s good,” he answered absentmindedly, still looking around the room, a few familiar faces nowhere to be found. “She was tired,” and a bit morbid toward the end.

Jack was curled up on one of the loveseats, a blanket tucked over him. Spencer continued looking around, confusion settling in until Emily spoke up, “He’s in the chapel. Rossi and Morgan are with him.”

Hotch was in the chapel, likely lighting a candle for Haley while Rossi and Morgan said a prayer for you. Oddly enough, it brought Spencer comfort to know that his friends were pulling for you in the ways they knew how, especially when he didn’t believe in it himself.

Spencer looked at the bracelet that you had placed in his hands, it was one of your most prized possessions, and should something happen to you, he was under strict instructions to hand it over to your father.

You were still a teenager when you were first diagnosed, and you were scared of having a big scar from open heart surgery, so your mom went out and bought you a charm bracelet. For each procedure after, you’d gotten a new charm for the bracelet with Hotch continuing the tradition after your mother had passed away.

There was no doubt in his mind that there would be a special charm for this surgery, Hotch usually had Penelope and JJ help him pick it out.

Penelope walked in, handing Spencer a cup of coffee. The average heart transplant takes six hours, but you have so much scar tissue that he wouldn’t be surprised if it took longer than that.

You were two years younger than him, and he found himself enamored with you from the moment you met. Your disease had forced you to leave college early, but your dad had set you up with a job in records at Quantico, both to give you something to do and to keep you nearby.

Until you just kept getting sicker, you were the best person they had working in records, but eventually, you had to leave that too.

The rest of the team caught on to Spencer’s crush, but you found yourself avoiding him like the plague. You turned him down eight times before you finally acquiesced, come to find out the only reason you said yes is because Hotch pushed you in that direction. Of all people, your father had just wanted you to continue living your life—he didn’t want you to become a hermit.

You would be one now though, with all of the immunosuppressants you’d be on post-transplant, you’d be spending a lot of time at home.

Rejection became a trend in your relationship when Spencer proposed to you last year. He’d done it properly, asking your father and Jack for permission, but you’d said no, rattling off some excuse about how he shouldn’t shackle himself to someone with one foot in the grave.

That night, after you had all but broken up with him, you’d collapsed and ended up in the hospital. The two of you made a promise to each other. If you ever got a new heart, you’d finally say yes.

The promise had been your idea, claiming that karma had caused you to collapse in your apartment because you turned him down. Spencer didn’t believe in karma and fate the way you did, but he did believe in you. That was enough for him.

Hotch came back up first, setting a comforting hand on Spencer’s shoulder before he walked back to where Jack was sleeping, your Aunt Jessica was back there with the two of them.

They hit the two-hour mark with no update, and Spencer convinced himself that no news had to be good news.

Derek and Rossi had made their way up to the waiting room, pulling out a deck of cards from the hospital gift shop and dealing around the table. Spencer just watched, he’d played more than enough card games in this hospital before, and he’d likely be playing many more in the future.

You’d have to stay in the hospital post-transplant for approximately a month, but it was some comfort to Spencer that instead of your health declining, you would begin feeling better. It hurt to hope, but he found himself excited at the prospect of you regaining your strength.

By the time five hours had passed, JJ and Derek had fallen asleep in their chairs, but everyone had committed themselves to waiting for you.

Spencer wanted to take you home, settle you into your shared apartment together, and let you heal, but you weren’t going to come home with him. When your month in the hospital was up, you’d go home with your dad and Jack. Your apartment didn’t have an elevator, and he worried about you having to use the stairs all the time. Your dad’s apartment had an elevator, so it became the obvious choice.

You told him you didn’t even remember what home looked like anymore. He couldn’t wait to bring you home.

He’d started to worry after six hours had passed, but just before hour seven hit, your cardiothoracic surgeon came out to the waiting room.

Careful not to wake Jack, Hotch stood up from his chair, approaching the surgeon with a wariness that Spencer had never seen from him. He waved Spencer over, silently inviting him to join the conversation.

“Everything went well, she’ll be in the CVICU still for a few days before she’s strong enough to be transferred,” the doctor explained, garnering the attention of some of the other people in the room. “Visiting hours don’t start for a few hours, but if one of you wants to stay with her until she wakes up, then I’d be willing to arrange an exception.”

You’d be waking up in a bright room with a tube in your throat, and having someone that you knew with you when you woke up would hopefully ease some of your fears. As soon as Spencer was about to offer to keep an eye on Jack so Hotch could sit with you, Hotch interrupted his train of thought, “You should go.”

Spencer frowned, glancing over your father, “Are you sure?”

Nodding, Hotch looked back at Jack, still sleeping on the loveseat. “I need to stay with him, and she wouldn’t want him to see her first thing,” he explained.

If Jack’s fear from earlier was any kind of forewarning, Hotch probably had a point when it came to wanting to stay with his youngest. Even still, Spencer protested, “I can stay with Jack.”

There were a number of people in the room who could stay with Jack, but Hotch clearly wanted to stay, “Don’t keep my daughter waiting, Reid.”

He did not have to be told twice, turning around and following the doctor to your room, scrubbing his hands before approaching the door. Faltering slightly at the doorway, Spencer found himself staring at you. There were so many wires and tubes connected to you that he’d have to take his time doing inventory of them all, there was a tube breathing for you, but your heart—your heart was beating steady.

“You can take a seat here,” a nurse said, gesturing to a chair for him to use. He sat down obediently, setting his bag on the ground next to him.

You wouldn’t come out from under the anesthesia for hours yet, but Spencer found comfort in knowing that he’d be here for you when you woke up. He could let you squeeze your hand when you felt pain, and he’d be there to wipe your tears away. At this point, he’d do anything you asked of him.

For now, all he had to do was wait. He clasped your hand in both of his and sat at your bedside, a ring box burning a hole in his messenger bag—waiting for you to be ready for it.

[spencersssockss]

Separation anxiety.

Summery: your out with the girls when Spencer calls, he realizes he can’t sleep without you so you go home and the two of you cuddle until you fall asleep.

Warnings: fluff, alcohol, separation anxiety and I think that’s all!

Word count: 600

You were out with the girls, celebrating for no reason at all but to simply have fun. You were all at your last stop, a bar, and It was safe to say Emily was plastered.

Meanwhile, your boyfriend of six months lay in your shared bed wide awake. He couldn’t sleep, he needed you to be next to him.

He knew that you wouldn’t be any longer but he decided to call to check on you.

Your phone rang loudly prompting you to tell the girls you’d be outside for a second so you could answer it, they simply nodded and you headed out before clicking the answer button.

“Hey I’m just checking on you, how are you doing?” Spencer asked the grogginess heavy in his voice.

“I’m good, why are you still awake though?” “It’s past midnight,” you spoke softly through the phone.

“I can’t sleep and I miss you so I figured I would just wait until you got home,” he added and you could hear him shuffle beneath the blanket.

“Oh, Spence, I’ll be home in ten, let me go talk to the girls,” you say making Spencer’s heart swell.

“No, you don’t have to, I want you to have fun,” he mumbled into the phone making you sigh.

“Spencer, Emily is wasted and I’m not going to let you be a zombie in the morning,” you say before opening the door and going back in.

“Fine, I love you,” Spencer said smiling softly on the other end of the phone.

“I love you too,” you spoke before smiling and hanging up.

Spencer was flattered that you would drop everything like that just so he could sleep. It meant so much to him, he thought you were the prettiest girl he had ever seen, and the fact you fell for him just as hard as he did you, made him love you even more.

“Hey guys I’m going to head home, does anyone need a ride home?” You ask the girls.

“Nope, we’re good thanks though, have fun with boy genius,” Emily replied winking, making you giggle softly.

“Alright, I’ll see you girls tomorrow!” You say smiling and waving before walking back outside to your car. You unlocked it and sat down, started it, and then sat for a minute to allow the heater to warm up.

You let out a content sigh once you could feel the heat being blown out and started driving home. You arrived about five minutes later put the car in park and went inside. It was silent as you walked upstairs to your bedroom.

Spencer sat up in bed reading a book patiently a smile covering his face once he saw you were home.

“Your home,” he exclaimed smiling softly. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too, I’m going to change into my pajamas and then we can get some shut-eye,” you spoke smiling and grabbing a nightgown from your closet.

You changed quickly and Spencer put his book down waiting for you to crawl in beside him.

After finishing you did just that, you crawled into bed beside him and he wrapped his arms around you gently while tucking his head into the crook of your neck.

“Mmm,” he groaned softly finally feeling at ease with you in his arms.

“Get some sleep pretty boy,” you spoke feeling him smile against your neck at the nickname.

“Will do, pretty girl,” he whispered back as the two of you slowly drifted off to sleep in eachothers arms.

[clockwayswrites]

Not So Imaginary

Parts 1-3 cw: Ethiopia, nightmares, medical care, non-graphic torture

Bruce had a file on Jason’s “imaginary” friend already, of course he did, but now it was being handled in a different light. Now it was being handled as facts. There was a theory, that Jason didn’t want to think too hard about, that Shelia had been able to see the Jason’s friend because they shared the same DNA.

(She wasn’t his mother, no matter the DNA.)

When Jason was well enough to sit and talk, they went through the file, occurrence by occurrence. When the file ran out— when Jason had stopped telling them about his friend— Jason had a lot more talking to do. The problem was, the more he was awake to talk, the more he worried about the fact that he hadn’t seen his friend.

He picked at the worry like a scab, constantly fussing over it out of worry. It didn’t go unnoticed.

“Maybe they’re not around because we’re around you more,” Dick said, prattling on like he did. “Or they used up a lot of energy! They did go all the way to Ethiopia. They could even still be traveling back.”

They were all good enough reasons, Jason supposed, but Jason wasn’t convinced so despite Dick’s effort, Jason stayed worried. Then he grew despondent. Then the nightmares changed.

Jason’s dreams had been uneasy since Ethiopia. His therapist said that was to be expected.

Some nights they were horrifying.

This was a different sort of horrifying.

This wasn’t his nightmares of being beat, endlessly, by that crowbar. Of Joker’s laughter. Of Shelia’s cold stare. The place he dreamed of wasn’t a warehouse but a facility. The cold eyes were hidden behind face shields. The pain was sharp and cutting.

Jason woke up screaming and knowing that the dream wasn’t his.

“They’re being tortured,” Jason mumbled into Bruce’s side after the tremors had faded and they all had calmed. They were piled in Bruce’s massive bed. Bruce still had his fingers against Jason’s pulse, Dick was gripping Jason’s ankle, and Jason didn’t even fight the nasal canal of oxygen.

“Little Wing?”

“It’s why they’re not here. I saw it in my dream. I know…” Jason had to close his eyes and focus on breathing for a little bit before he could continue. “I know how it sounds, but that wasn’t my dream. It was theirs. I know it was. They can… they always know when I’m in danger, is it crazy to think it works both ways?”

Bruce did that sigh of his, the one he did when he had too much in his head and needed to set it aside. “No, Jaylad, it’s not crazy. If you’re up for it chum, we’ll go to the Watchtower today and have J’onn see if he can sense any sort of telepathic connection.”

“And if he does? If they’re being hurt?”

“Then we’ll save them.”

---

AN: This story has turned very mean lol sorry. But! Danny soon? Still a very little bit, writing is a struggle atm with this week long migraine, but! It's something. Stay delightful, darlings.

[imfinereallyy]

“The demon is back.” Eddie pokes into Steve’s side to wake him up.

“Babe, please go back to sleep.” Steve shoves his face into the pillow, making his voice muffled.

“Steeeeve.” Eddie whines, “It’s really there I swear this time. And I locked the door so I know it’s the demon again. Nothing else can get inside.”

“Eddie.” Steve squishes his face even deeper into the mattress. “You do this at least once a week. I love you; I do. But I never look because there is no demon. And every morning, you wake up fine. So please, go back to sleep.”

“What if I promise never to mention it again if it’s not really there? Will you look then?” This time Eddie’s voice wavers, his actual terror showing.

Steve sighs and shifts his head to look at Eddie, “This is really freaking you out, huh?” He says it kindly. Steve can tell this is serious to Eddie. So even if he doesn’t believe it, Eddie does. And what’s important to Eddie is important to Steve.

Eddie nods back furiously.

“Okay, I’ll look.” Steve shifts his head towards the other side, where the chair by the window sits. There, sitting in that corner is a dark shadowy figure. “Oh.”

“See! I told you! Demon! Oh god, it’s gonna get us.” Eddie throws his hands up. Even though he’s terrified, he’s accepted defeat.

“No.” Steve says calmly. “It’s just El.”

Eddie pauses his rant, “What?”

“It’s just El. In the corner. She does that sometimes, watches people she cares about until she falls asleep. To make sure they’re safe.” Steve looks at Eddie.

“The door was locked! How are you so calm about one of the kids just watching us at night?”

“Honey, she has mind powers. I don’t think a flimsy lock from Home Depot is going to stop her.” Steve deadpans before shrugging, “And it’s El. She could ask me to kill a man, and I probably wouldn’t even ask questions.”

“What if she asked you to kill me?”

“I’d be conflicted.”

“I want to be mad, but honestly I think I’d hand you the knife.” Eddie sighs, looking down at Steve.

Steve scoffs, “Don’t be ridiculous. I wouldn’t stab you. I’d obviously sneak some kind of poison into your honeycombs. Way less messy.”

Eddie goes back to nearly shouting, “Why have you thought about this?!”

“Honestly, I have a lot of intrusive thoughts. I just don’t speak them out loud.”

Despite the fact they are actively talking about his murder, Eddie can’t help but get all gooey with Steve in their bed. “Is this why you don’t get mad when I think aloud? Another reason why you just get me. Adding that tally to the ‘why we are great together’ column.”

“Yes, we’re pretty amazing. Can we go back to sleep now?” Steve smiles.

“Yes—wait, no.” Eddie corrects himself, getting himself back on track. He loves this man, but he is a sneaky little minx. “Why did El never say anything? I mean, this is not the first time I accused her of being a demon. Hell, we’ve been talking for literally five minutes, and she still hasn’t said anything. Also, what if she walked in on us doing, ya know, adult stuff?” Eddie blushes at the end. He’s acting like he hasn’t been whispering way worse things in Steve’s ear every night.

“First off, she won’t walk in on that. Apparently Max taught her about happy screams a long time ago.”

“Gross.”

“Yeaaa. Second, I’m pretty sure she’s asleep right now.”

Huh, now that Eddie thinks about it, he does hear soft little snores. Which is weird since neither he nor Steve snores, and they are both, ya know, awake.

“And I don’t think El speaking in a dark corner would have helped your fears. Like imagine just hear her soft “Hello” at 2 a.m.” Steve raises an eyebrow.

“I—okay I got nothing.”

“Fantastic can we go back to sleep now?”

Eddie gives one last shout, “You’re not going to stop her?”

“Are you going to tell her no? And make her worry?”

Eddie slinks down into the covers, “...no.”

“That’s what I thought.”

Eddie curves his body into Steve’s, seeking him out. Steve wraps his arms around Eddie, securing him to his chest. “Thank you for indulging me.”

Steve hums. “Anything for you baby. I love you.”

“I love you too.” Eddie kisses Steve lightly.

“I love you both as well.” El’s voice suddenly speaks into the silent room.

“Jesus Christ!” Eddie screams.

Steve can’t help the giggles that come out of him. He tries to smother them into Eddie’s shoulder.

Eddie can’t find it in himself to be mad.

———

some people seemed interested in more el + Steve sibling energy. And they are a sibling-like duo I love. So here’s a little something but more steddie involved. I think all three of their relationship would be very sweet. Both Eddie and Steve would protect el. I hope you enjoyed :)

[irndad]

hi im back! okey so def can see spencer still wanting to hug and snuggle with you even when fighting or mad at each other. he even gets genuinely ??? confused ??? when you try to sleep on the couch instead of in bed at night. he holds you and either reader or him is like "i know we are snuggling right now but i am still super pissed off at you." lol i can just see it. he may be petty when mad but he wont stop trying to touch you bc its a biological need of his and no argument is more important than needing you 🥺

enjoy this I did it very fast!!!! ily

He knows he’s not easy to be with sometimes. She would never say it, but it’s true. He doesn’t always get the jokes, sometimes pushes things too far and without even knowing it the ground gets pulled out from under him. 

And sleep- Sleep is so complicated. The memory of the first time she slept in his bed is etched into a place he could never erase. Spencer had always had trouble sleeping, either fear or alertness plaguing him into the late hours of the night. He used to lie awake, the kind of exhausted that feels like it’s seeping out of your bones, while constantly facts he’d unwittingly memorized about how sleep deprivation can cause brain damage. 

But then she’d come into his life. All soft words and gentle disposition, and there really is something magic about the way that everything just dissipates when her warm, soft body curves into his own. He’s slept well almost every night since. 

Except today, she isn’t coming to bed. 

It’s his fault, and he knows it. He wasn’t being fair. She hadn’t seen him for two weeks (and he hadn’t slept nearly enough without the weight of her form beside him since the last time he saw her) and she’d said that she wanted to be prioritized more. 

“I haven’t seen you in weeks, Spence!”

His head was killing him. Was it actually possible, for a headache to kill you? Her voice is audibly upset, and it’s alarming how he could be the cause of it. 

“Please,” he had said through labored effort, “Can we talk about this later?” 

“When would you like to talk about it? Because I don’t ever know if you’re leaving-“

“Do you even know what it is that I do?  That it’s not a choice for me to go? I have to do this. I can’t pick and choose and honestly, I don’t want to. If you don’t get that, we’re not doing what I thought we were doing.”

It sounds foreign, his own voice. And it’s after he’s said it that the sick taste reaches his throat because oh, that means the end. Her lovely face is unreadable for a brief moment, before something like grief splays over her expression.

It’s silent for a beat, and Spencer wishes he could swallow the words back up, rewind his life like a battered VHS tape where he’s not so stupid to mess up the one thing that’s ever brought him peace.

“You’re not yourself, Spencer. I’m gonna give you a minute.”

A minute, it turns out, is hours in the living room. She hadn’t left, thank fucking god, but she hadn’t come back. Of course she hadn’t. She wasn’t the one who needed to apologize. 

He’s just so tired. 

He thinks of her so-sweet voice, the curve of cheek- the junction of her neck and shoulder, and how much he would like to have her pressed against him. He pads out into the living room like a nervous puppy, and sees her sleeping on the olive green couch she had picked out. Her hair was splayed across the arm of the sofa, and her head laid on a throw pillow, their fuzziest blanket draped across her form. 

His first thought is how low he’s dropped, that he’s jealous of a blanket. 

His second his that she is not coming to bed. He sits beside her gingerly, and the scent of her body wash lingers in the air. 

“Are you planning on coming to bed?”

“I didn’t think you’d want me to.” He can tell she wants to sound cold, but the truth is much worse; she sounds guarded. 

“I always want you to.” It’s the most honest thing he’s said today, and it’s just not fair, how much he revolves around her. How he has waited 14 days, 13 hours and 34 minutes to hold her again and managed to ruin it within the first 20 minutes of having seen her again. He grabs her hand, soft and pliant against his in a way that almost makes his heart leap. “Please? Come to bed?”

Her gaze softens, the warmth and light that guides him back in her eyes, and he hopes his relief isn’t too visible. It’s then that she drinks him in. It feels too revealing like she can see right through him. His clothes are old. He’d rushed off the jet to see her, and the half moon circles under his eyes only lend to the unimpressive picture of himself. 

“Oh, sweetheart,” she breathes, touching the side of his face. He instantly leans into it, the contact more than he’d be willing to give up to save his dignity. “Come here.”

She wraps her arms around him, and he pulls her into his lap, squeezing her tight to his chest, like she might disappear. 

“I’m still mad at you,” she says, looking at him with such affection it betrays her words.

“That’s okay,” he says into her collarbone, “As long as I still have you.”

[luvhughes43]

is it over now? | jack hughes

part two of the beginning

au masterlist⭐️

note: i switched to first person pov for this story just to test it out. Inbox me if you’d want to go back to 3rd person.

warnings: pregnancy, birth

word count: 4.7k

the doctors waiting room is cold and uninviting. i stare up at all the pregnancy posters that litter the walls, and soon my gaze falls to all the mothers and all the fathers. they all sit, talking quietly amongst themselves. the women are gorgeously radiant, and if this were any other time i’d compare their beauty to mine. 

instead, i linger on the way they interact with their husbands, boyfriends, whatever. small touches, whispers, and smiles all burn into my mind like a useless cd. 

“y/n l/n?” a nurse in all blue interrupts my thoughts, she gestures for me to follow her and i do. 

like the waiting room, the small room i’m brought into is cold. i wonder briefly what jacks doing right now. if he had gotten my message or if he’s still asleep. i try to imagine his reaction but i can’t bring myself to conjure up an accurate depiction of him. everything is off - and i fear if i keep trying to imagine this man who’s not my jack, that i’ll somehow forget the real one. 

“we’re just going to do some tests, all very basic things. i need to know your medical history, and i’ll have to do a complete physical assessment,” a doctor walks into the room, clipboard in hand. she doesn’t look at me as she speaks, but I absentmindedly nod to her words anyway. 

“Okay so, is this your first pregnancy?” the doctor asks. 

“Yes” i nod.

“And, do you have any medical history I should be aware of? Past procedures, family history, etc” the doctor looks up from their notes and i pause. 

“Uh, i -” my cell phone buzzes in my purse and i quickly reach for it. Its a notification from sephora, something about how there’s a last minute sale and that i should buy some overpriced body spray. 

“I had my tonsils taken out when I was five, but other than that i’ve had no other procedures” my words come out shaky, as if i’m confused. i turn my phone over again, willing for another notification to pop up. It’s 11:40am, and jack is definitely awake by now. 

the doctor calls a nurse in to prep for the examination. everythings a blur as i lean back. the nurse, short with reddish-blonde hair, has to ask me to lift up the bottom of my shirt twice. 

“And if you look over here, this is where your baby is,” the doctor is confident in her speech as she shifts the little wand around my stomach. 

the appointment was nightmarish. 

the nurse sent me home with a little packet of information sheets, all different colours and all about different things. i don’t want to look at them, so i shove them into the bottom of my purse when i get out of the office. 

⋆ ★

vivienne always made sure to wake up an hour before jack. she liked to make herself a fancy coffee with her espresso machine, and she liked to plan out her events for the day. she had decided that they’d go to the grocery store sometime before noon, hit the mall for an outfit to wear to dinner, and then of course dinner with viviennes friends at 7. 

after her coffee, Vivienne tiptoed her way back into her bedroom. she was proud of the fact that Jack liked to stay here. she made sure her bedding was always fresh and clean when he was over, and she made sure to spray a little bit of her perfume on his pillows so he’d get used to falling asleep to the scent of her. 

Vivienne grabbed a hold of Jack's phone on his nightstand, and slowly slid it off the side of the table and into the palm of her hand. she turned it over, bombarded with the amount of notifications that littered his phone screen. she slid up, quickly typing his passcode. she had to be mindful of her next moves. she didn’t have long to do her routine digging. 

“It’s not really fair for you to be with vivienne if you still have feelings for y/n”

“will you drop it? you were the one who told me to go for viv”

“Jack-”

“No! Dawson, you were the one who begged me to move on. I am. What happened with me and y/n-"Jack cuts himself off. “what happened.. It’s done now. leave me alone” 

Vivienne recalled the conversation she overheard a few weeks ago and she couldn’t shake it from her mind. So, she did what any girlfriend would do and searched the girls username on instagram. 

She hadn’t thought y/n would be any type of problem in hers and Jack's relationship. That was until Jack and Vivienne were laying in bed, with Jack wanting to show Vivienne a picture he had taken a while ago on a roadie. He was scrolling past his photo albums when she saw it. The “it” being a photo album titled “❤️” filled with pictures of jack and y/n at art galleries and whatnot. 

Ynuser: 1 dm request

Accept | Delete

Vivienne clicked onto the dm, and when she saw the words pregnant and yours her blood ran cold. She angled her body away from Jack, and with his reassuring snores clouding her mind, she reread the dm again. 

Jack, I don't even know how to tell you this. It doesn’t feel right. But, I took a pregnancy test and it came back positive. I’ve booked an appointment with my obgyn for tomorrow and they’re going to confirm the test for me. You're the only person that I've been with since we’ve gotten together so it’s for sure yours. If you need a paternity test or anything at all just let me know and we can sort it out. Please reach out and we can talk about this in person. I’m sorry.

“Fuck” Vivienne cursed as she clicked Jacks phone off. She turned around and stared at the man in question while debating her options. 

Letting Jack find the message on his own was the most obvious answer but… would he still want to be with her when he found out about the baby? If it even is his, Vivienne rolled her eyes at the thought. 

The next logical option was to delete the message and block the girl. Jack would never have to know, and Vivienne would just have to be the perfect girlfriend for the next little while. She’d make him his favourite foods, dress extra hot, and do everything in her power to make sure he forgot about his ex. 

Vivienne turned Jack's phone on again, and without a second thought, swiftly declined the message request before blocking the girl. 

To make sure her tracks were completely cleared, she searched the girls name up in his contact list and blocked her there as well. 

And, just as quickly as Vivienne had picked up her boyfriends phone, she had set it back down. 

⋆ ★

After the appointment, I was stuck in meetings for the rest of the day with no opportunities to check my phone. During my appointed bathroom breaks, I was too anxious to check. My hands trembled as I hovered over the instagram app, too nervous to see if he had read the message. 

I thought about the next message that I would send all day. Would I send the doctors confirmation? My next appointment date? The reason why I found out about the pregnancy so late? 

When I got out from work, I decided to walk the 45 minutes home instead of taking the Subway. I hoped that the semi-fresh air would clear my mind. 

By the time I unlocked the front door of my apartment, it was 6:45pm. Jack would have gotten out of practice, and he would probably be at home grilling himself a piece of chicken while his rice cooked. 

I pull my boots off and wander into my bathroom. i shut the door behind me, giving myself some privacy from my own space. When I close my eyes, all the memories of Jack and I flicker through my mind like one of those plastic children's cameras.

I take a deep breath, before finally pulling my phone out of my pocket and turning it on. I click into instagram and my stomach drops. 

jackhughes

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what the fuck was i going to do.

⋆ ★

“Claudia!” my voice was hoarse from crying as I pounded on my best friend's door with my fists. I had run all the way to Claudia's apartment, and luckily someone was walking into her apartment complex so I didn't have to buzz in. 

Claudia's door swung open, and she immediately pulled me inside and into her arms. “What's wrong?” she practically cooed, not a stranger to my breakdowns. 

“J-jack he-” I couldn't stomach the rest.

“Babe, slow down… breathe..” Claudia stressed as she started doing breathing exercises for me to copy. I followed her movements, and when I was deemed calm enough she moved me over to sit on her couch. 

I take a few minutes to recover before explaining what happened. 

“I’m going to kill him” Claudia sneered after I had explained the pregnancy, the message, and how my ex boyfriend-turned-baby daddy had blocked me. 

“What am I going to do?” I was crying again. I was bordering on exhaustion as I leaned my head against the back of Claudia's couch and wailed.  

My hand found its place at the top of my stomach, where the faintest baby bump had begun to form. 

⋆ ★

vivienne just added to their story!

vivienne

liked by jackhughes, trevorzegras, alixearle, and others

vivienne mr nhl man

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user01 VIVIENNE HAS A BF??

user02 viv baby who is it

user04 vivnation lost

user05 jack and trevor liking ohhh wow…

user06 is it jack?

user07 i thought jack has a gf?

user06 he was seen out with a girl a few times months ago but that was it lol

user08 the nhl girlies lost

⋆ ★

ynuser

liked by claudia, and others

ynuser my baby🤍

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claudia im a proud honorary aunt❤️

user00 congrats!! 

user01 Congratulations on your pregnancy sweetie! We have to get together sometime soon😘❤️

⋆ ★

the pregnancy was lonely. It was all long hours at work, quiet doctor appointments, and late nights binge sessions watching gossip girl with whatever craving plagued my mind. 

I tried my hardest to stay away from social media, my heart cracking a little more every time jack came across my feed with his rumoured new girlfriend. of course, i knew it wasn’t a rumour, which just made everything more miserable. 

“Do you want to know the gender?” the ultrasound tech asked as she shielded the sonogram screen away from my view. 

I nod, “yes, please”

Claudia squeezes my hand. “Are you sure? I can throw you a gender reveal party if you want? Or we can do something with just the two of us?” 

I didn’t want to hurt Claudias feelings, but it wouldn’t be the same without jack. 

I must have took too long to answer though, because the ultrasound tech looked at me with pity filled eyes as she said, “i’ll put the gender info in an envelope for you to take home”

All i could do was nod. 

⋆ ★

“Im sorry, blair.. But you lost the baby”

“where’s chuck?”

“B, he lost a lot of blood, and he never woke up” 

Gossip girl season 5 played in the background as I picked at my newest pregnancy craving, strawberry cupcakes from a bakery off seventh ave. 

i sighed heavily as i continued watching the show. this has got to be the saddest episode… i thought as blair started praying for chucks survival. As the scene went on, tears pricked my own eyes as i thought about the past five months. 

i was almost done with my 2nd trimester, and i was still refusing to acknowledge my pregnancy. I felt as if i were walking through water, i was restricted in all of my movements and my mind was cloudy like i had just spent all day in the michigan summer sun. 

The episode finished, with blair telling chuck that she loved him but that she couldn’t be with him and that she couldnt tell him why. 

When the screen turned black and i was faced with my reflection, i started sobbing. 

Heavy tears rolled down my cheeks and fell onto my duvet, which turned the cream coloured blanket into spots of grey. 

Without thinking, I rolled out of bed and threw on a thick sweater that I found strewn against a chair backing. I wandered out into my entryway, shoving on a pair of my mini uggs as I searched high and low for that stupid little envelope that my tech gave me. 

It was in my purse, hidden behind a hundred other little things. Once the envelope was grasped firmly in my hands, i ripped open my door and rushed down onto the street. 

I didn’t have a lot of time to think this through. If i placed the order now, everything would be okay and fine...

Truth be told, i was afraid that if i didn’t order a gender reveal cupcake that i would be doing my baby a disservice. I promised to myself that i would be able to do this without jacks support, and yet here i was crumbling under the pressure of motherhood. 

The bakery shop chimed with my arrival, and then i was in the small line up to make an order. 

“Hey, what can i get for you tod-”

“Can i get a gender reveal cupcake? Or one of those little cakes?” i ask, thrusting my envelope into the guy at the registers hands. 

He looked taken aback before responding very politely, “i’m sorry, you’re going to have to make an order online” 

“Oh,” my shoulders sag in disappointment. I hadn't thought far enough ahead. 

the guy stared at the crumpled up envelope in his hand, and then back at me. “Why don’t you go sit down and i’ll figure something out for you,” his voice was kind as he noticed my dishevelled state. 

I nod, and then move to an empty seat in the corner of the bakery. Another employee was sweeping the floors, and i realize that the store must be due to close soon. I need to pull myself together… 

About ten minutes later, the guy from before walked over with a little white box in his hand. On top of the box sat my envelope which was now cleanly cut into. 

“It’s not the prettiest thing in the world,” the guy chuckled as he placed the small box in front of me, “but it should work” 

“Thank you,” i stutter, pulling a crisp $10 bill out of my pocket and handing it over to the guy. 

At first he shakes his head in an attempt to decline the money, but I insist he takes it anyway. 

back at home, i get comfy at my kitchen table where i finally open up my box. It was a vanilla cupcake with white vanilla frosting. 

I take a deep breath before taking a small bite, and when i swallow, i see the remaining pink icing that filled the inside of the cupcake. 

“we’re having a little girl,” i whispered, tears sliding down my cheeks as i rub my bump soothingly. 

⋆ ★

Jack Hughes was stuck. He felt bad for Vivienne and he felt bad for himself. It wasn’t Viviennes fault that his attention was elsewhere because on paper, Vivienne Aiden was probably who most would consider his perfect match. 

Vivienne was gorgeous, she had an online career going for her, and her apartment did smell amazing… but something just wasn’t right. 

When she fell asleep beside him, Jack would pull out his phone and scroll through his photo album full of pictures of his ex-girlfriend. He would wonder what she was doing, what new journalist piece she was working on, and most importantly, if she was happy. He couldn’t bear searching her up online, for fear of seeing she had moved on (which, let's be honest, is very hypocritical of him), so Jack settled with his photo album. 

When Jack finally closed his eyes for the night, he imagined the sleeping figure next to him was his y/n. Vanilla scent was swapped with coconut, a windy spring turned into an endless summer, and the lingering emptiness felt like coming home after a long roadie. 

And in the morning, when y/ns lovely green eyes woke him up, he would blink to find Vivienne staring back at him, and whatever relief he had accustomed himself with in sleep came crashing down again. 

⋆ ★

ynuser posted on their story! 

jackhughes posted on their story!

Vivienne posted on their story!

⋆ ★

Vivienne wasn’t an idiot. she could feel the small shifts in Jack's behaviour. He was slowly distancing himself from her and she wouldn't allow that to happen. 

Therefore, she sent him a teasing photo, planned a romantic dinner at her apartment, and took care of business. 

Create an Account

User: user257483475

ynuser

Dm Request

User257483475: how does it feel knowing that you’re going to be a single mom?

User257483475: must be tough knowing that the daddy doesn’t want it

User257483475: if i were you i wouldn’t even try

Read

⋆ ★

“I can’t believe you're having a little girl!” Claudia squealed as she met me at the front of a baby store. I was now 6 months along, and I hadn’t done any of the necessary baby shopping yet. 

We walked into the store, light pinks and blues and purples clouding my vision. “I can't believe it either! A little girl…” I smile, picking up a little onesie. 

Claudia gets a basket, and we start to make our way through the store. “Have you thought of any names yet?” she asks as she holds up what might've been the cutest baby dress i’ve ever seen. 

I placed the dress in the basket. “I’ve been toying with a few names but it just feels strange” I pick up another little dress and put it in the basket as well. “I’m sure once I see the nursery all together it’ll feel a little more real and i’ll be able to pick something out” 

Claudia smiles at me sympathetically before taking the shopping basket out of my hand and guiding me towards the furniture section.

“I was thinking-” my phone buzzes causing me to pause. I pull out my phone, only to see a few instagram notifications. 

User257483475: viviennes so pretty, i bet you're real jealous huh?

User257483475: jack didn't even want to post you publicly and now he wont even acknowledge his baby… he never loved you.

User257483475: i wish you the worst xx

Read

“y/n? What were you thinking?” Claudia asks, immediately noticing my pause. She walks over to me, one hand on my shoulder as she tries to gauge my facial expressions. “Are you okay?”

I don't want to speak, and so I thrust my phone into Claudia's hands. 

She gasps when she reads the first message from a few weeks ago, and I can feel her tense beside me as she lets her hand drop from my shoulder.

“What the fuck!” she seethes as she stares at all the messages littering my phone.

“How do they know the baby’s Jacks? How do they even know I'm pregnant? My account’s private!” I utter as I close my eyes. 

“Who’s Vivienne?” Claudia asks as she switches out of my dms and onto the search page. I watch her type in Vivienne's name.

“She’s Jack’s girlfriend,” I reply just as Claudia presses on her instagram account. The newest picture on her feed was of her and Jack at some cafe… I felt nauseous. 

“Well, she’s obviously the one sending the messages” my best friend states firmly. Great I thought. Could my life get any more fucked up? 

That night at home, I easily verifiy that it was Vivienne behind the account. For all the scheming she liked to do, she wasn’t very good at covering her tracks. 

First, I used my laptop to try and log into her main instagram account. When I got the password wrong, I clicked the option for instagram to send a code for password resetting via email. The email, half unblurred, showed up on screen. Then, i moved onto the account who’s been sending me nasty messages. Repeated the process, and wouldn’t you know! Vivienne Aiden didn’t doesn’t know how to make a fake email for her fake account, that she uses to harass her boyfriend's ex! Nice. 

With that little confirmation, I blocked both her and the account she’s using to send me messages. 

⋆ ★

My baby’s nursery is painted a soft pink. Her crib is a beige wood, and there’s white flowy curtains with a blackout curtain set underneath. flower prints decorate the walls, and my baby’s name is highlighted on a beautiful homemade blanket which was gifted to me by one of my coworkers. 

“Are you ready, baby?” my mom asks to which I nod. I watch her silently as her hands weave between different sets of baby clothes.

She’s helping me get the nursery finished for babygirls birth next month. 

“I’m nervous, but i’m ready,” I smile, waddling over to the blush pink rocking chair that sits in the corner of the room. 

⋆ ★

“i’m not ready! i need jack!” i cry, squeezing my eyes shut tight as pain overtook my body. i could hear the nurses faintly in the background of my own thoughts, shouting something about an excess of blood. 

a group of nurses stand around me, all shouting different orders to one another. “ma’am you’re bleeding-“ 

“i need, i just need-“ 

a sweet looking nurse cut me off. “sweetie, you’re going to be alright. just breathe, i’ll be right here with you this whole time!” she grabs ahold of my hand to which i squeeze tightly. 

the room spins and my whole body feels cold. I could tell that the nurses started going about their business from all the pinching and poking that was going on, but i couldn’t figure out where all the pain was coming from.

⋆ ★

“Mommy?” I whispered. My mom whipped her head in my direction upon my words. 

“Oh sweetie,” she coos, tears lingering in her eyes as she sits on the edge of my hospital bed. she grabs ahold of my hand. 

“Is…” I start to ask about my daughter but a cry falls from my lips. 

My mom grabs my hand tighter and brushes my hair out of my face. “She’s in the NICU, but the nurses say she’s doing well” 

“Can I see her?” my voice is hoarse. My mom jumps up from the bed and fills an empty paper cup with water. She passes the cup to me, and I gratefully drink its contents. 

“I’ll go get a nurse, okay? She’ll tell you everything you need to know”

I had been asleep for roughly ten hours after my daughters birth. The doctor told me that the pain I woke up to last night was from blood clots, which is the reason behind all the blood and the premature birth. Luckily though, I was pretty close to full term, and I got to the hospital at the perfect time therefore babygirl would only have to stay at the NICU for a few short weeks to monitor her development. 

“what’s her name, sweetheart?” my mom whispered softly to me while her hand ghosted across hairline.

“Leighton Rowe LN,” I replied sleepily as I stared at my baby in my arms. Leightons sweet face suddenly made all the pain worth it.

my mom brushed my damp hair out of my face. “that’s beautiful,” she cooed, and when she gestured towards the baby I tiredly nodded.

as my mom took my baby out of my arms to coddle, i let my eyes close and then i softly drifted off to sleep.

⋆ ★

It was a few months later when it happened. claudia was at my apartment, watching leighton while i ran around the city to get some much needed errands done. i stop at my favourite coffee shop, a place that i hadn’t been to since jack and i broke up. 

i order my usual, a mocha to go, and when i turn to leave jack had just opened the door. I stumble back, not prepared to see jack in the flesh. He looks familiar and yet completely different. 

“y/n,” he greets me, his tone uncertain as he takes a step towards me. How dare he.

“If your girlfriend sends me one more fucking text i swear i’ll ruin her life” i start, my words threatening as i let the weight of viviennes words fall onto my shoulders. for months shes been creating new accounts and messaging me, and despite hitting the "block all and future accounts" feature she still managed to harass me.

“I get that you don’t want to have a baby, but she’s here, and I'm capable of doing it without you. I have been doing it without you. So get your girlfriend to stop harassing me or i’ll press charges,” i spit out, pushing past a shell-shocked jack and storming out onto the street. 

⋆ ★

“I have a baby!” jack shouts angrily, kicking one of vivienne's wooden dinning room chairs. “You hid my baby from me!” 

Vivienne stares, glassy eyed as she watches her boyfriend stomp around her apartment. “Jack, i didn’t mean for it to go this far i-”

“You what? What was the plan here?” he shouts again, running a hand frustratingly through his hair. Jack stops, whipping around to face vivienne again. “Show me the messages.”

“What?” she cries. 

“y/n said you were sending her messages. Show me them” jack repeats, causing vivienne to jump up in alarm. If he saw even half of the things she sent…

Jack storms up to vivienne who immediately pulls her phone out of her pocket. She switches onto one of her many burner accounts used to send y/n messages. 

Jack sat on the couch, hunched over while he read through every single message. He felt sick. 

he hates you

It must suck knowing that your child's dad doesn't want her

Jacks going to be the best daddy to our future baby… its too bad he didn’t want that for you. 

“Jack we can fix this, i swear i’ll do better and-”

Jack stood up abruptly, letting viviennes phone tumble to the ground with a loud thud. “We’re- we’re past done. I don't even know what to say to you,” jack stutters, tears falling steadily down his cheeks. 

“Baby, i’m so sorry” vivienne cries. she tries to reach out to jack, be he swats her hands away. 

Jack backs away, and without another word he leaves viviennes apartment with the slam of a door.  he had to make this right to y/n and his... baby.

-

part three

[idkwhatever580]

Nat…

Masterlist

Taglist

Pairings: Natasha romanoff x reader!highschoolau

Prompt: Natasha and y/n like each other but are two dumb idiots that won’t ever confess their love. Or will they? (You know they will) both are about 17-18

Warnings: swearing, Natasha has bad parents

Pronouns: she/her mostly

A/N: Omg I need some fluff. lol all of my stuff is basically fluff. Also I’m graduating todayyy!!!!! I’m so excited!!! I’m gonna cry 😭

Nobody’s Pov

Natasha and y/n are having yet another sleepover. Ever since Natasha turned 16 she was basically kicked out.

And so naturally her best friend y/n welcomed her immediately into her home.

And of course y/n’s parents were more than happy to take her in.

Natasha goes home sometimes, but mostly stays in the y/l/n’s guest room which at this point is her own room.

And yet, the girls always find themselves asleep together in one of either beds.

Natasha lies awake behind y/n in an almost spooning position, and she just admires y/n from afar. She can’t even see y/n’s face but she doesn’t care. She softly trails her nimble fingers up and down her arms and shoulders.

Her touch is so light. Yet not enough to wake up y/n. Or so she thought.

Y/n’s pov

I softly awake to Nat’s hands rubbing up and down my arm.

I don’t want her to pull away like she always does, so I stay as still and as calm as possible.

I won’t move a muscle so that she stays close to me.

Okay. Sure. Maybe I do have a little crush on her.

Maybe it’s not so little.

We’ve known each other since we started school. And although her parents are assholes, I’ve always been by her side. Through thick and thin.

So of course I was bound to fall in love with her.

It’s hard though. She hates physical touch but I’m her exception. She loves simple things like holding pinkies. Or a slight touch of shoulders or knees. But when we’re alone she’s all over me.

And yeah it’s nice but it’s hard when she doesn’t like me the same way. It’s hard when she’s so flirty too.

But I don’t care. All I can about right now is the fact that she is touching me.

I keep pretending to sleep but I know I move a lot in my sleep so I decide to turn around and snuggle into her. She won’t do anything since I’m “asleep.”

She pauses her movements scared she’s woken me up but then when she thinks I’m still asleep she envelopes me in a hug.

I softly breathe into her neck and smell her.

She smells nice.

She smells my hair. And rubs my back. And I wish she’d do this in a romantic way. But that’s not her thing.

But then. Out of the blue she starts whispering to me. Obviously she thinks I’m still asleep. And I guess I’m doing a good job. But I’ve always been god at fake sleeping. And it’s not like she’s a super spy or anything.

She starts whispering into my head from where she is. Like she’s wanting to tell me this.

“Y/n, I don’t know how or why, but I’ve fallen for you.”

If I wasn’t fake sleeping I would be shitting my pants right now. But I want to hear what she has to say so I keep up my facade.

“I love your hair and how it looks in the wind. I love how your nose crinkles a bit when you smile. I love you have little specks of gold in your eyes when you look at the sun.”

She sighs and continues

“I wish I was brave enough to tell you all of this. I wish I could kiss you and tell you how much I love you.”

She is getting a bit choked up and I hear her sniffle a bit but she keeps going

“I wish you loved me. But you don’t. So I can’t ever tell you these things. Because I don’t want to lose you. If I can’t have you as a lover, then I’ll take you as my friend. And that’s okay.”

She sniffs a bit more and continues, god what I’d do to kiss her right now

“I just don’t know what I’m going to do when you fall in love with someone else. I’m not ready to hear you talk about your crush. I’m not ready for you to break my heart. I’m not ready to watch you at the altar and hear you say I do to a stranger as I stay silent when they ask if anyone objects.”

Another sigh. She starts scratching my head softly.

“But I won’t say anything. I will never tell you how the first time you gave me butterflies, I thought I was actually sick. I thought I was having a heart attack at 16. And I never said anything. I can’t. I won’t. Your happiness matters too much to me. So I’ll stay your best friend. And I’ll let you go.”

She holds me tighter and says

“Because sometimes when you love something, you have to set it free”

My heart clenches at her words.

She really does love me. Oh my god she loves me back. I have to tell her!

I almost jump up but then I realize she’d know I was fake sleeping if I jumped up. So I pretend to shuffle a bit.

She stops her speech knowing I’ll be “waking up” soon and just continues to scratch my head softly.

I “wake up” and peek my eyes open at her.

She smiles and says

“Hi”

I send her a dopey smile full of love back at her and say

“Hey”

Then we pull apart awkwardly and I don’t know how to tell her that I love her too.

So I end up letting us get ready and then we go downstairs for breakfast.

My mom has known about my crush on nat for a while but she doesn’t mind. She thinks it’s cute.

And my dad has an idea about it but he doesn’t really dabble with my relationships yet. They’re both supportive though thankfully.

We eat breakfast and have some small talk.

Natasha knows I don’t like to talk a bunch in the mornings. But when we’re done with breakfast and put our dishes in the sink to clean later we head back up to my room.

“Wanna play Roblox?”

Natasha asks me with a smile knowing I love Roblox on Saturdays.

I nod my head and we jump on the bed and I decide I should tell her.

We sit on my bed and I set my phone down as I think of how to tell her. She suddenly says

“You alright?”

I nod my head and say

“Can I tell you something?”

She sets down her phone and nods her head. Then we face each other sitting with our legs criss crossed and she’s all ears.

“I have this crush on this girl.”

A flash of dread goes over her face. Clearly she is not ready to hear this yet. But she doesn’t know it’s her. Either way she covers it up and pretends to be excited.

“Omg! Really? Who is she! Do I know her? What’s her name? What does she look like?”

I smile cheekily and say

“Well. I won’t tell you her name yet”

She groans at my teasing and I continue regardless

“But. I’ll tell you about her and then I’ll tell you who she is.”

She nods her head and is staring at me.

“Well, her hair is so pretty. It’s curly and red. And her eyes are like forests.”

I kind of look off into space and keep talking as if I’m imagining my dream girl

“Her smile is so pretty and we’re pretty good friends. Her laugh is so contagious and she just lights up the room wherever she goes. She has had a rough life, but she’s never lost her heart. And she’s so kind to me. But I think the thing that gets me is how she loves everyone and everything. She talks to passionately about her feelings and her hopes and dreams to me. And it’s really only a few people she lets in and I am so lucky to be her friend. And I think she likes me back”

Natasha’s shoulders slump a bit more every few seconds and she’s droopy now. I look back at her and say

“Any guesses?”

I send her a sly smile and she looks at me and says

“Wanda?”

I start laughing my ass of and I say

“Oh man you’re so funny. Heck no! She might fit my type but definitely not her.”

Then Natasha kind of shrugs her shoulders and is gloomy now. She doesn’t care that she’s showing her dissapointed face at my crush.

I lift her chin up and say

“Nat…”

I give her a look telling her everything she needs to know. But she doesn’t believe me so she says

“Who is it then?”

I smile and giggle at her obliviousness and I say

“I’m not gonna tell you until you give me some advice. What should I do about it?”

She sighs and says

“I guess you should tell her.”

I smile and say

“Nat…”

She looks at me and says

“What?”

I smile and say

“I just did”

Her face turns pale and she says

“Wha- what do you mean?”

I giggle and say

“Natty, I just told her.”

She blinks a bit and silently points at herself as if she doesn’t believe me.

I laugh and nod and then I say

“I really really like you nat. And I wanna kiss you”

Usually I am not this bold so she is a bit dumbfounded and she nods her head so I lean in until I’m about half an inch away from her and she takes the initiative to go the rest of the way.

The kiss is soft and tender. Wayyy better than i imagined. And her lips are divine. They make me think of when the girl from the Lorax was describing truffula trees. (I don’t know. Don’t ask)

Then I pull away in need of air even though I don’t want to and we just stare at each other.

I look back at her lips and now I have become very shy. So she takes the lead and kisses me hard on the lips this time.

She ends up pushing me back on the bed and I wrap my left hand around her side and my right one threads into her hair.

We kiss and kiss and then after a bit, she trails her tongue along my bottom lip asking for permission and I grant it.

When she puts her tongue in my mouth I almost pass out. God she’s going to be the death of me.

This kiss is amazing. After a bit more kissing I accidentally let out a moan and it brings us back to reality so she pulls away.

I keep my eyes closed for a few seconds and a dopey smile is on my face.

She giggles at my flustered state and I finally open my eyes and awkwardly say

“Hi”

She laughs and says

“Hi”

We sit in silence for a bit until she gets off of me and I sit up. I look at her and say

“I’m sorry”

Her eyebrows furrow and she says

“Why?”

I look at my hands in my lap and I say

“I heard you this morning. When you said all those things to me. I’m sorry I didn’t say anything earlier but I didn’t know how to tell you”

She scoffs and shoves my shoulder slightly saying

“You little fuck!”

I laugh and then say

“Forgive me?”

She thinks about it and says

“I’ll forgive you if you say yes to this…”

I nod my head and dramatically say

“I’d do anything for my queen to forgive me!”

She laughs and says

“Be my girlfriend?”

My breath catches in my throat and all I can muster up is a nod.

She smiles and gives me a soft peck and my face turns red. I am all awkward now so I say

“What now?”

not knowing what to do and Natasha says

“Well. We could play Roblox?”

I nod my head and gasp and say

“Wanna be Roblox girlfriends?!”

She nods her head at my childishness and I pump my fist knowing Roblox girlfriends is like the ultimate title. Then my mom knocks on my door and says

“Y/n?”

“Come in!”

I smile at my mom and she narrows her eyes at me and says

“You’re being suspicious…”

She takes a look around my room but drops it and says

“Can you please text me those pictures from last night?”

I nod my head and say

“Do you want the ones of me in my cap and gown?”

she nods her head and says

“Yeah and make sure you send me the one of you throwing your cap in the air”

I nod my head and she leaves. Then I turn to Natasha and she says

“I can’t believe we graduated yesterday and now we’re dating!!!”

I nod my head and say

“Roblox baby”

“Yes of course. I forgot”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: sorry about the last part. I didn’t know how to finish it and graduation has been on my mind.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taglist

@ihartnat @ilovesnat

[honeypiehotchner]

The Gambit (Hotch x Fem!Reader) -- part four

(Yes I'm posting another one don't look at me) Happy New Year's Eve everyone! Another treat for the holidays from me as I keep writing at the speed of light xxx

Warnings: angst angst angst!

When you get downstairs to the hotel lobby in the morning, Hotch thinks it’s time to play twenty-fucking-questions.

“Did you sleep?”

You give him a weird look. This is question number seven. “I took a nap. I’m fine.” Never mind the fact that Hotch doesn’t look like he slept a wink. He probably stayed awake, mulling over files all night.

“How much did you smoke?” he asks. Number eight.

Behind you, Derek joins in as he walks up with coffee. “You bought cigarettes? We talked about this.”

“Can both of you get off my dick?” you laugh, trying to hide how annoyed and uncomfortable this is making you. “We have a missing girl. Shouldn’t we focus on that? Can we go?”

“Does everyone have what they need?” Hotch asks, though he’s already moving toward the door. His phone lights up in his hand and he takes it, muttering, “This is Agent Hotchner.”

You all wait anxiously for Hotch to finish the call, but continue walking toward the parking lot. It’s not until you’re nearly at the cars that the call ends, and Hotch begins speed walking.

“That was the sheriff,” he says, opening the driver’s side door. “Richard Monroe turned himself in five minutes ago.”

“What?” you blurt, hopping in the passenger seat of Hotch’s car without thinking. You see Derek get in the backseat and think thank god someone else got in. “Does he have Lila?” As much as you hate Hotch’s view of this case, you still feel the need to ask.

“No,” Hotch says, and you feel a spark of pride in yourself. “He claims to not know where she is.”

You groan, but it’s cut off by a surprised yelp as Hotch speeds onto the main road, putting the lights on, and squealing the tires. You reach up for the safety bar, holding on for dear life as Hotch races to the precinct.

+++

Richard Monroe looks like a ghost.

He spends the first few minutes of the interrogation asking Morgan where Lila is. And when Morgan finally says “we don’t know,” Richard starts to cry.

“Hotch…” you shake your head, looking away. “He’s telling the truth. He doesn’t have her.”

Hotch stays silent, arms crossed over his chest as he watches Richard and Morgan. “Or he’s playing a game.”

“Can you be serious for one second?” 

Hotch doesn’t even turn his head to look at you. Instead, you get a glare from the corner of his eye. “I am being serious.”

“We need to ask him if he knows anyone that might pose as him,” you press. 

Hotch ignores you.

Morgan stands and leaves the interrogation room, coming out to stand next to you and Hotch. “He’s distraught, man.”

“Because he doesn’t have her,” you insist. “Let me talk to him.”

“No,” Hotch says.

“You didn’t even think about it.”

“Because I don’t need to,” Hotch replies, still cold. “You don’t have clearance.”

“Clearance?”

“Hotch, what does that even mean?” Morgan butts in, surprising you. “It can’t hurt, man. I think he needs someone in there that’s not me or you. He’s just going to get angry if you walk in there.”

“Exactly,” you nod in agreement. “He needs to feel in control again. So let me.”

Hotch takes a moment to at least think about it, and then he says, “Go.”

“Is that a yes?”

“Go before I change my mind.”

You smile. “Is there a box of tissues around?”

+++

You set the box of tissues in front of Richard Monroe, also giving him a cup of water. He keeps his head down, his fingers clenched together.

“Here,” you barely whisper. “I’m really sorry about my colleague. He can get a little…aggressive.”

Richard says nothing, but he does nod.

“I’m Agent L/N,” you begin. “I’m new. I just felt so bad for you, I had to come say something.” You pause, taking the seat across from him. “I’m really sorry about your daughter. We’re doing everything we can to find her. I know you had nothing to do with this.”

“I really didn’t,” he says. The words are as quiet as they are pitiful. “I wouldn’t. Not her.”

“I know,” you nod. You need to ask your next question. You just hope it won’t set him off again. “Do you know anyone who would?” 

He shakes his head, but doesn’t seem angry or upset. “No one knows about her. And if they do, they know not to fucking touch her.”

That sounds about right. “I understand,” you nod. “Is there anyone who would,” you pause and chuckle, playing up the dumb newbie act, “have ‘beef’ with you, so to speak? About anything?”

He looks up then, and grins. It makes your stomach turn. “They don’t live long enough.”

You lean into your startled reaction. You can see he’s opening up more and more with how vulnerable you let yourself seem. 

He grabs the cup of water and downs it in one go. “How new are you?”

“It’s my first day,” you reply sheepishly, making yourself smaller and smaller. “I’m not supposed to be in here, but I just felt so bad.”

“You’re a sweet girl,” Richard says, still with the same smile that makes you uneasy. It takes too long for you to realize that it’s the same crazed look your dad used to have. “What’s a sweet girl like you doing working for the FBI?”

“What’s someone like you doing turning yourself in to the FBI?” you counter. “I’ve heard about you, y’know.”

Richard leans back in his seat. “Yeah? What have you heard?”

“That you’ve gotten away with it all thus far,” you shrug. “Been completely off the FBI’s radar. So why’d you jump back on it now?”

He narrows his eyes at you. “How new did you say you were?”

You ignore him. He’s halfway onto you now anyway. “Surely it’s not just because your daughter has gone missing. You couldn’t possibly love her that m—”

He slams his hands on the table hard, and you almost jump, but you don’t move an inch. He stares at you, that same wild look you’ve seen before.

“You don’t scare me,” you say. “What’s the real reason you’re here?”

His left eye twitches. “Why do you look familiar?”

Your blood runs cold but you don’t show it. “Why are you avoiding my question?” You cross your arms over your chest. “I know you don’t give a shit about your ex-wife either, Richard, so what is it?”

“You think we’re all the same, don’t you?” he taunts. “That just because we do what we do means we can’t feel love.”

I know you can’t, you think. “Do you love your daughter?”

“Yes,” he answers instantly. Zero doubt. “And despite what my ex-wife tells you, I love her too. I just want to keep them safe.”

“Safe from what?”

“People like me,” he replies. “Who do you think?”

You stay silent for a moment. He’s studying your face in a way you don’t like. That’s your cue to leave.

You nod like you’ve figured him out and stand up, pushing your chair in. “Do you want more water?”

“No.”

“Suit yourself,” you shrug, turning for the door.

“What’d you say your name was?”

You repeat it, knowing it will tell him nothing. There’s a reason you changed it. He seems dissatisfied as you expected because if your hunch is right about his, it wasn’t the surname he expected you to have.

He shouldn’t have expected you to keep the name. Lila probably won’t keep hers.

You return to the other room where Hotch is waiting and watching. His eyes follow you as you step inside, looking through the window at Richard.

“I’m not sure if any of that was remotely useful,” you admit. “But maybe he’ll be more amenable now. I seem to have caught him off guard.”

Hotch says nothing. And he won’t stop looking at you.

You sigh, turning to meet his eyes with a tired stare. You raise your eyebrows. “What? Do I have something on my face?”

“Why did he recognize you?”

You keep your expression neutral. “I don’t know, Hotch. Ask him. He’s the one in handcuffs.”

Hotch seems to accept your answer — or if he doesn’t, he doesn’t show it. You leave him to brood and head back into the conference room to help Reid. Rossi goes to join Hotch and you pointedly don’t think about how they’re probably talking about you.

+++

Richard must really love his daughter. He’s not happy to learn there’s someone posing as him on said chatting site, and that they convinced Lila to run away with them. 

He swears up and down that he’ll do anything to help find her. It makes you angrier than it should.

You’re not angry at him, not really. You know it’s misguided anger. You know who you’re really angry at. But you refuse to admit that to yourself, so instead you’re picking fights with your boss.

Although, in your opinion, Hotch started it.

“You’re seriously going to keep me from speaking to him just because he thinks he recognizes me?” You nearly roll your eyes at Hotch, but you stop yourself. “You’re being ridiculous.”

“You’re being defensive,” Hotch points out, his arms crossed like he’s trying to prove a point. “What are you not telling me?”

“Why are you so interested?” you counter, crossing your arms too. You’re not trying to mock him, but if it comes across that way, then so be it. “Trying to get in my pants or something?”

Hotch’s gaze might as well be laced with fire. “Take a walk. Now.”

“Fuck off.”

“Agent—”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m going.” You glare at him over your shoulder as you head for the doors of the precinct.

You shove the doors open with a huff, turning and walking to the left of the parking lot. You’re really wishing you didn’t leave the pack of cigarettes in your hotel room right about now.

What the hell is Hotch’s problem— No, what the hell is Richard’s problem? Why does he think he knows you? How is that even possible? 

You think back. Your dad would’ve been in his sixties now, pushing seventy. Richard is 54. The possibility that they knew each other is small, but still there, and not impossible like you’d prefer. The fact that the possibility is there at all is pissing you off.

You’re not stupid. You know this comes with the territory. You know this is what you get for testing fate like this. But there’s a reason you changed your name. There’s a reason your mom packed everything up and moved halfway across the country with you when you were a teenager. It was a new start, a new life. One where you had no ties to him. None.

So why does some random FBI’s Most Wanted act like he’s seen your face before? Has he? How?

“You’re gonna start a tornado if you keep turning in circles like that.”

“Not in the mood, Morgan,” you say calmly, despite the anger raging through you. “Sorry if he’s being a jackass.” You raise your hand and gesture to yourself, “My fault.”

Morgan scoffs. “Right.”

You shrug. As much as Hotch irritates the shit out of you, you’re well aware you bring it on yourself sometimes. It doesn’t help that he gets under your skin so easily and will have you firing off at any little thing. You bring it on yourself just as much as he starts it on his own.

You’re both at fault and neither of you will admit it. Ever. Over your dead body.

“Come back inside.”

“Can’t. I’ve been exiled.”

“Y/N,” Morgan tries again. “What’s going on?”

You stop pacing. “Nothing is going on.”

“Hotch told me the guy recognized you.” 

You roll your eyes. “Hotch is paranoid.”

“Really? ‘Cause right now you’re looking just as paranoid.”

You shoot him a glare. “Don’t.”

“I’m just saying.”

“I know you are, but don’t, okay?” you all but plead. “Leave it alone. Please.”

Morgan tilts his head. He looks ready to do everything except leave it alone. “You’ll tell me if it’s a problem?”

“Yes,” you nod, meaning it. He’s dead, anyway, so it won’t be a problem. “But it’s really not. And I’m not paranoid, I’m just thinking. Well— Maybe I am paranoid. We need to find her.”

“We will,” Morgan says. “Now, come inside. We need everyone on deck.”

You can’t argue with that and you’re cooled down enough now, so you relent. “Alright.”

You follow Morgan back into the precinct and into the conference room with the rest of the team. You share a look and single nod with Hotch. A silent truce, for now. 

+++

Turns out, a serial killer like Richard does have a lot of enemies, including some who would jump at the chance to torment his daughter. Go figure.

They’re easier to narrow down and pinpoint once Richard actually starts to work with the team. Hotch struck a deal, apparently, to make his sentence lighter if he helps. No death penalty, but still life in prison, after all he’s done.

To your surprise, Richard is relieved about no death penalty. Because, he said, if there’s any chance his daughter will see him one day, he wants to be alive.

It sends a spark of anger through you so hot that you have to walk away. 

You spend the rest of the day with Reid, decoding messages, silently nodding back and forth, and chewing on as many pen caps as you can. It’s probably not good for your teeth, but neither of you care about that right now.

You’re both shocked out of your trances when Morgan comes flying into the room, Garcia on speakerphone, with Hotch and Prentiss right behind them. 

“I found her phone, I found it,” Garcia’s voice comes through the speaker. “Sending coordinates to everyone now.”

“Rossi and JJ are on it,” Hotch answers. “They’re already out.”

“It’s not moving, so it might be nothing,” Garcia says.

You worry for a moment that her phone is thrown in a bush somewhere. And then you feel sick to your stomach when Rossi confirms as much.

“They’re bringing it back here,” Hotch says, his phone still pressed to his ear. “It’s broken, like someone threw it out. Garcia, can you get me any and all CCTV footage in the area?”

“Already ahead of you, sir,” she replies. “Give me five.” The call ends abruptly, no doubt so she can focus and type faster.

“Should we tell Richard?” you ask. “He’s been cooperating, but this could be an extra push.”

Hotch studies you for a moment. “Fine. But wait until they bring the phone. Show it to him.” 

He gives you a look that just screams and if he recognizes you again, you’re out.

[tortillamastersblog]

Back To You - Part 4 | Sam Carpenter

Pairing: Sam Carpenter x reader

Warnings: mentions of violence, death, blood, injuries, and swearing

Summary: When Sam left after turning eighteen, you were devastated. You’d been in love with her since you were kids and her leaving meant you never got to tell her how you truly felt.

Fast forward a couple of years, Tara gets attacked and Sam returns. . .

Previous Part | Next Part | Masterlist

_______________________________________________

Present

Billy Loomis is Sam’s real dad. . .

Tara’s words and her recount of her conversation with Sam makes all the puzzle pieces fall into place.

That’s why Sam snuck into my room all those years ago. That’s why she changed so much after, and that’s why she left.

It all makes sense now, but it doesn’t change the fact that she hurt Tara by leaving, hurt me by leaving. It also doesn’t change the fact that she wasn’t there for me when I needed her to most. When I begged her to come back and she just screamed at me to stop calling without even letting me explain why I was calling in the first place.

I’m feeling so many things right now, it’s kind of overwhelming, but I try my best to stay calm so I don’t freak Tara out.

She’s been moved to a private floor since Sam left and slept earlier while I called Liam and Paige again. Now, she’s awake once more, curled into my side while we’re watching a movie together.

I really try to focus on what’s going on, but my mind keeps drifting back to Sam.

She could have talked to me! She could have told me about her real dad. Why didn’t she? Did she think I was going to hate her for it? Did she think I would stop being her friend if I knew?

I wouldn’t have done any of that. Who her father is doesn’t change who she is. At least that’s my opinion. She must think otherwise, because if she didn’t, she wouldn’t have left.

I’m mad at her for abandoning Tara and leaving me. I’m sad she felt like she couldn’t talk to me, and I’m heartbroken thinking about how she tried to numb her pain by doing every drug imaginable and sleeping with anyone who would have her.

I still love her, that’s for sure because if I didn’t, I wouldn’t be feeling like this, but I’m just not sure love is enough for me to forgive and forget everything she’s done.

“Hey.” Tara’s voice and her finger poking my chin snaps me out of my thoughts.

I clear my throat quietly and look down at her. “Yeah?”

“You okay?” she asks, her kind brown eyes darting between my own.

“No, not really, Sprout.” Tara wrinkles her nose and I chuckle. She’s never liked that nickname. “But I will be, and so will you.“

“You sure?” she asks and I nod.

“I’m sure. Now watch the movie, or I’m changing it,” I tease, making her laugh softly.

“Okay, okay. . .” She looks me over one last time before turning her attention back to the movie, mumbling, “You’re so annoying.”

I just hum and scratch her head, settling deeper into the bed and actually focusing on the movie. Thoughts of Sam are still swirling around in the back of my mind, but I ignore them as best as I can.

About half an hour later, the movie is still playing and, much to my surprise, I’m actually invested in the story now.

Some shuffling and a grunt in the hallway outside makes me look away from the TV though. We’re on a private floor and no one but Deputy Vinson should be here. A nurse comes in every two hours or so to check on Tara, but she was just here before we started the movie.

Alarm bells almost instantly go off in the back of my head, but I don’t want to scare Tara, so I stay calm and shout, “Hello?”

There’s no answer.

“Vinson?”

Again, nothing.

My stomach drops. This is not good. This is not good, at all.

“Y/N?” Tara whispers fearfully, the beeping sound of her heart rate monitor next to the bed speeding up.

I swallow thickly and continue to stare at the open doorway, straining my ears to hear anything else. It stays quiet though, and with every second that passes, the uneasiness in the pit of my stomach grows.

“Y/N,” Tara whimpers and when our eyes meet I see the fear I’m feeling inside reflected back at me.

He’s back. It’s Ghostface. It has to be him. He’s returned to finish the job.

I can feel my own heart rate picking up speed, and after another beat of silence, I decide that we have to leave. We’re sitting ducks if we stay.

“Fuck this.” I swallow again and nod to myself before pushing the blanket to the bottom of the bed. “We’re leaving, Sprout.”

Tara’s eyes widen and she doesn’t protest when I disconnect the IV from the back of her hand. For a moment, she’s frozen, watching me disconnect her from all the machines she’s attached to, before springing into action herself.

With shaking hands, she removes the oxygen tube while I get up and pull the nearby wheelchair to the side of the bed.

I won’t be able to do anything with only one arm, so even though it hurts and I know I’m probably going to tear my stitches, I take off my sling.

I wince at the stinging pain that shoots through my neck and arm, but grit my teeth and help Tara with the rest of the wires. Then I make sure the wheelchair’s breaks are on before turning back to the bed.

“We have to get moving, c’mon. I know this is going to hurt, but we have to go,” I say, slipping my arms under Tara’s knees and under her back. I don’t lift her yet though, waiting for her to nod before hoisting her up.

The gasp she lets out makes me hurt for her, but I can’t stop now.

We have to leave.

Carefully, I lift her out of the bed and place her in the wheelchair, making sure I don’t bump her broken leg against anything.

My shoulder protests, screaming in pain even though Tara is easy to lift, but I don’t stop moving especially when the lights suddenly go out.

We have to leave, now!

Tara whimpers in fear and in pain, and I rush to turn off the breaks on the wheelchair before pushing her to the doorway.

He’s here. I know it.

I peek into the ominously dark hallway all while trying not to let panic take over my mind.

Fear is healthy, panic is deadly.

That’s what my father taught me, and I know if we’re going to get out of this alive, I have to keep a clear head.

The hallway is empty, and the only way out is by getting to the elevator at the end of the hallway, so I slowly push Tara out of the room, keeping my eyes and ears open for any movement near by.

Just get to the elevator.

The deafening sound of Tara’s phone ringing on the bedside table back in her room makes both of us jump for a moment.

Tara sobs quietly, and I tighten my grip on the wheelchair.

I glance over my shoulder, seeing the screen of the phone light up the room before turning back around. There’s no time to get it now, and even less time to answer it.

I push Tara into the hallway, slowly and quietly while letting my eyes dart around in the darkness for any sign of danger.

It still eerily quiet though and I don’t see anything, so I continue pushing her until we get to the nurses’ station.

That’s where a chocked gasp claws it’s way out of Tara and when I follow her line of sight, I freeze for a second.

Laying right there on his back on the ground, with a slit throat and a pool of blood around his head is one of the deputies Sheriff Hicks assigned to Tara’s floor. He’s still alive, even though only barely, and chokes on his own blood, his wide eyes staring unblinkingly at the ceiling.

There’s nothing we can do to help him, he’ll be dead within a minute, but still, the sight of him, so helpless and alone, makes the blood in my veins freeze.

That could be me, or worse, Tara.

Stop! Don’t think about that, Y/N. Focus.

My dad’s voice rings in my head and makes me snap out of it. He’s right, I have to focus.

I’m about to continue pushing Tara towards the elevator, but then a thought strikes me.

I pause and look around again before letting go of the wheelchair and crouching down next to the deputy. I reach for his belt, fumbling around until my hand grazes the holster of his gun.

With a gun, we’d at least stand a change against Ghostface, but as fate would have it, the holster is empty. The gun is gone.

Fuck.

Not only does that mean that we have nothing to defend ourselves with, it also means that Ghostface has the gun.

Tara sobs into her hands and watches me get back up, only to flinch and freeze a second later when we hear a door being opened somewhere down the hall.

There’s no time to ponder over the gun and its whereabouts now. I spin around and take a hold of the wheelchair again.

Getting to the elevator now is too risky. It’s too far away, so I wheel Tara into the room right next to the nurses’ station.

We need help.

Tara whimpers and cries quietly while I close the door behind us. I don’t shut it all the way, just enough to hide us from plain sight while still being able to see what’s going on outside. Then, I fumble around for my phone in my sweatpants.

Just like with the gun though, I come up empty, and the realization that it must have slipped out of my pocket while watching the movie makes my heart drop.

No, no, no, no, no. This can’t be happening.

My hands begin shaking, and it’s getting harder to keep my panic at bay.

We’re alone with a psychopathic killer, we have no way out, no help is coming, and I’m not in any shape to fight properly.

Tears well up in my eyes and I feel my bottom lip quivering. There’s no way out.

My heart starts pounding in my ears and my hands start shaking.

Please, no. Not now.

I’ve had enough panic attacks after my parents death to know what it feels like when one is about to start, and even though it sucks having them at any time, it would be especially inconvenient right now.

I force myself to calm my breaths and blink away the tears, but it doesn’t help much.

We’re trapped.

We’re alone.

I continue to focus on steadying my breathing while also keeping an ear out for any more sounds in the hallway.

That is until Tara nudges me. I clench and unclench my fists, and look at her. She has tears streaming down her face, but she’s urgently gesturing at something she can’t reach.

I follow the length of her arm with my eyes and almost start crying with relief when I spot the phone on the wall right next to the door.

I lunge for it and start dialing 911 with shaking hands only to stop a moment later when another door opens out in the hallway.

Tara clutches the back of my sweater with her uninjured hand and bites her bottom lip to prevent any more sobs from escaping her.

I flinch when another door gets opened, this time closer by, and hold my breath.

This is it. He’s here.

I lower the phone and square my shoulders, ready to fight when the door to our room suddenly swings open.

Tara yelps and I instinctively punch whoever just walked in.

“Ow!” Richie stumbles back against the doorframe and raises a hand to where my fist just connected with his jaw. “Ah, goddamn it!”

“Richie?” Tara’s pulls on the back of my sweater to get me to step out of her line of sight while I simply stare at Richie in disbelief.

I’m honestly relieved it’s just him, and that he’s here because now we’re no longer alone, but I can’t find it in myself to feel sorry for punching him.

“What are you doing here?” Tara asks as Richie continues to recover from the punch.

“Sam called,” he explains and as he continues to talk, I feel some of the tension in my body dissipate. “She said that you were in trouble.”

He doesn’t look at me when he says it, and the revelation that Sam probably only called about Tara is like a blow to the stomach.

I don’t get much time to dwell on it though because a split second later, Ghosface appears behind Richie, ready to strike with a knife in his hand.

“Look out!” I shout, stepping in front of Tara again.

Richie spins just in time to avoid getting stabbed, but the knife manages to cut his forearm. Ghostface goes in for another stab, but Richie manages to catch his wrist before he can bring the knife down on him.

He grunts and they struggle for a moment, but then Ghostface manages to grab the back of Richies head and slam him into the door frame, knocking him out.

“Shit!” I clench my jaw when Ghostface turns his attention to Tara and me, and quickly grab the IV stand next to us, flinging it at him.

Ghostface goes down because the monitor on the IV stand hits him in the head, and I rush to wheel Tara out of the room.

We’re almost back in the hallway, away from Ghostface, when he suddenly lands a punch on the back of my left knee, making my leg buckle. I stumble and manage to regain my footing without going down, but that little trip costs me a lot of precious seconds.

“Y/N!” Tara twists around in the wheelchair with wide eyes and even though I know Ghostface is now back on his feet and right behind me, it still catches me off guard when he wraps his arm around my neck from behind and punches me in the side, right below my ribs.

“Ah, fuck!” I grunt and grab his forearm, trying to pry it away from my neck, but it doesn’t budge. “Go, Tara!”

Another blow, this time to my ribs, takes my breath away, and even though I’m in pain, it fills me with an unexplainable rage.

Instead of trying to get his arm away from my neck again, I dig my heels into the ground and push backward until we hit a wall. Ghostface hisses in pain and I use the momentary distraction to get out of the headlock.

Then, I run to Tara, limping slightly and ignoring the sound of a phone ringing nearby. She’s crying and struggling to move in the wheelchair, and the sight of the blood soaked bandage around her hand makes my stomach clench.

I’m about to reach her, my arms already outstretched to grab onto the wheelchair, but then I’m tackled to the ground from behind.

My head hits the floor, making black dots dance in my vision for a moment and then my head is yanked up by my hair.

“Hold it right there, Tara,” Ghostface says, the voice changer eerily distorting his voice, “or I’ll slit Y/N’s throat.”

Tara freezes and wheels around in time to see Ghostface press the blade of his knife against my neck. He’s kneeling on my back and I know I have no way of escaping without getting my throat slit.

It stings when he pushes the knife down a little too hard, drawing some blood in the process, but I don’t dare to move.

“Y/N!” Tara cries and I try not to cough because of the weight on my back. “No, please don’t.“

“Tara, go!” I rasp, feeling the edge of the knife dig even deeper into the skin of my neck.

Tara shakes he head desperately, tears rolling down her cheeks. “No, Y/N, I—“

“Do you hear that, Sam?” Ghostface says and at the mention of Sam’s name my heart drops. He must be on the phone with her. “Your little sister and Y/N, begging for each other’s lives. Pathetic, don’t you think?”

Tara makes a move to wheel closer, but I pin her down with a stare to stop her. Go, I mouth, but Tara doesn’t move while Ghostface continues talking to Sam.

I can’t hear everything he’s saying because my ears are ringing, but when he suddenly gets off my back and approaches Tara with calculated steps, I hear him say, “So, the choice is up to you. Who is it going to be, Sam? Richie, Y/N, or Tara?”

Tara whimpers as Ghostface gets nearer, but she’s too injured to get away. She manages to turn the wheelchair around, but Ghostface is right there before she can even attempt to get away.

He grabs the handles of the chair and tips it forward forcefully, making Tara fall and land on the ground with a cry of pain.

No, not her. Not Tara. Please, anyone but her. She’s been through enough.

“Stop!” I groan, trying to get up, but slipping on something sticky on the floor. My shoulder stings and the side where Ghostface punched me burns, but I try to get back up again, and this time, I manage. On unsteady feet, I limp toward Ghostface who’s now standing over Tara.

He twirls the knife in his hand and raises his arm, getting ready to strike while Tara sobs.

“No!” I’m not going to make it. “Tara!”

Just then, the elevator dings and the doors open. Ghostface looks up, surprised, and dives out of the way when gunshots ring out.

My eyes widen at the sight of Sam and Dewey?! who dart out of the elevator.

“Tara!” Sam rushes to her sister’s side and drops to her knees, trying to help her to her feet.

“I’ll get Richie,” Dewey says, but then he freezes when his eyes land on me. “Y/N?! What are you doing here? Are you hurt?”

I wave him off and shake my head, looking around to see where Ghostface went. “Not now, I’m fine. Go get Richie, I’ll help Sam with Tara.”

“Okay.” Dewey nods and stares at me a moment longer before dashing past me to help Richie.

The last time we saw each other was at my parents’ funeral. He used to be like an uncle to me because he was friends with my dad, but after the accident, we kind of drifted apart.

Now is no time to dwell on the past though. I push through my dizziness and the pain in my side, shoulder and leg, and limp the rest of the way to Tara and Sam.

Sam’s already managed to get a crying and whimpering Tara to her feet, but Tara can’t walk with her broken leg, so as soon as I’m within reach I tug on Sam’s jacket to get her to stop dragging Tara to the elevator.

“Stop, let me help.”

Sam’s eyes widen. “Y/N, y-you’re here?”

“Of course, I’m here,” I snap, not because I’m mad but because there’s no time to talk. “Now, let’s get a move on!”

Still in disbelief, Sam doesn’t say anything else as I scoop Tara up into my arms.

“Ow,” she whines and I quickly apologize for hurting her.

I limp to the elevator with Sam hot on my heels and lean against the wall as soon as we’re inside. My legs are shaking and my entire body hurts, but I’m not letting go of Tara until we’re safe.

Sam holds the doors open while Richie and Dewey make their way to the elevator.

They’ve almost made it when, out of nowhere, Ghostface comes back, crashing into them from the side. Richie falls to the ground, and Dewey gets pushed against the wall which makes him fire his gun.

A struggle ensues between Dewey and Ghostface while Richie tries to get back up, and for a moment it looks as though Ghostface’s got the upper hand, but then Dewey headbutts him.

Ghostface stumbles back and Dewey grabs his gun off the ground, firing it at Ghostface before he can come at him again.

He stumbles back at the force of the shots hitting him in the chest until he crashes into the glass display cabinet on the opposite wall.

He sinks to the ground and stops moving, and even though I’m not convinced he’s dead, there’s no time to make sure he is. We have to get out of here as fast as possible.

Dewey must think so too because he gets to his feet and immediately pulls Richie up as well.

“Let’s get out of here,” he grunts, dragging Richie toward the elevator. “Come on, hurry up.”

They finally make it, and Richie slumps against the wall next to Sam who runs her hands over him and checks for any not-so obvious injuries.

“You okay?” she asks, her voice laced with worry.

Richie nods and exhales shakily. “Yeah, you?”

Sam nods. “Fine.” Then she turns her attention back to Tara who’s got her arms wrapped around my neck and is crying into my shoulder.

“It hurts, Sam,” she cries, and I press a kiss to her forehead while Sam takes a hold of her hand.

Dewey pushes the elevator button for the first floor, but before the doors can slide shut, he stops them with his hand and says, “The head. . .”

Richie frowns. “What?”

“You have to shoot ‘em in the head or they always come back,” Dewey explains, stepping back out of the elevator.

Sam gapes at him and asks exactly what I’m thinking. “Dewey, who gives a fuck?”

A forlorn look enters his eyes and as the doors slide shut, he says, “I do.”

“No! Dewey!” I try to step forward to stop him, but as soon as I shift my weight off the wall, my legs start trembling, so I slump back and grit my teeth.

It’s too late.

The doors close and the elevator starts descending. A tense silence settles over us for the duration of the ride, but then the doors open and Richie stumbles out first, shouting for help.

Doctors and nurses swarm us almost instantly and within seconds, a gurney is brought over and I place Tara on it.

She’s okay.

Seeing her being taken care of lifts a huge weight off my shoulders and the relief on Sam’s face makes me smile a little.

She’s going to be okay.

The dizziness I felt before suddenly returns full force now that the adrenaline is wearing off, but I can’t sit down and rest until Dewey is safe, too.

He’s up there all alone. Someone has to help him.

I stumble back to the elevator but a hand on my stomach stops me from entering it.

I look down, swaying slightly, before following the arm connect to the hand all the way up with my eyes until they land on Sam’s face.

Wait. . . Sam?

“Where are you going, Y/N?” she asks, frowning.

I blink to get rid of the irritating black dots growing in my vision and try to push past her. “D-Dewey, he needs—he needs help, Sam.”

“I know,” she says, stopping me again by grabbing a fistful of my sweater. “But you can’t go up there. The police are already on their way.”

“But. . . But Dewey,” I slur. I grasp at Sam’s hand to get her to let go of me which, much to my surprise, she actually does.

It doesn’t last long though because not even a second later my knees buckle and I fall forward, right into her arms.

“Y/N? Y/N!” Sam panics and grabs onto anything she can to stop both of us from toppling to the ground. “Oh my God, you’re hurt.”

I awkwardly slide down her body, bringing her down with me until we’re both on the floor and I’m gasping for air.

“Y/N, hey. . . Hey!” Sam grunts and manages to scramble out from underneath me before propping me up against the wall next to us. “Look at me. What’s wrong? What hurts?” she asks, but I can’t answer. My lungs suddenly feel like they’re on fire and every breath I take makes it harder to breathe.

“What happened? Did Ghostface—“ She falls silent when her eyes land on her hands and when I look down, I see why.

They’re covered in blood. My blood. But. . . how?

I think about everything that happened, and then dread settles in the pit of my stomach when the realization hits.

Ghostface wasn’t punching me. When he “hit” me all those times, he wasn’t punching me. He wasn’t punching me at all. He was stabbing me.

Welp, that explains why my side hurts so much. I thought I was going soft.

My eyes flutter shut and I cough, tasting blood in my mouth.

I guess no one noticed I was hurt until now because I didn’t feel anything until the adrenaline wore off and the blood soaking my clothes wasn’t visible because both my sweater and my sweatpants are black.

“Y/N, hey! Don’t you dare close your eyes.” Sam cups my cheeks and shakes my head slightly to get me to open my eyes again. “We need some help over here!” she shouts over her shoulder before looking back at me.

She’s frantic, more frantic than I’ve ever seen her, and her eyes are filling with tears. Her hands drop off my face and she’s quick to push my sweater up to take in the extent of my injuries.

“Oh my God.” Her voice cracks and when she presses her hands against my side to slow the bleeding, I cry out in pain.

I gasp like a fish out of water, still struggling to get enough air into my lungs, and push at her hands.

“No, stop— Stop!” she protests, desperately pressing her hands against my side again.

“Hurts,” I wheeze and Sam nods frantically with tears dripping down her cheeks.

“I know, I know,” she says, “but I’m trying to help.”

I writhe in agony, but don’t try to push her off again. I don’t think I even could if I tried because with every passing moment I feel weaker.

My eyes are also threatening to close again and when Sam notices, she presses down harder on my side and shouts for help again.

This time, a nearby nurse notices and she springs into action. She rushes over, dragging a doctor with her and tells another nurse to bring a gurney.

I don’t focus on her though. No, I keep my attention on Sam and how she’s desperately try to stop my bleeding.

She’s crying, covered in blood, and on the verge of hyperventilating, but she’s still beautiful.

So beautiful. . .

I cough again just as the nurse and doctor drop down next to me, and when Sam takes her hands away so they can examine me, I give into the urge to close my eyes.

_______________________________________________

Whew! I wrote this in one sitting, and only proofread it once, so please excuse any mistakes I may have made/overlooked.

Tag list: @artrizzler19 @btay3115 @canyonyodeler @quadofthec @pussyydestroyer @bella423

[alwaysanundertone]

Day 14, bet's on | rosekiller

@yourfiendlyneighbourspiderman sent a request for this one <3

smut

TW: NSFW, oral (fem and male receiving), bondage, piv, multiple orgasms.

part 1, part 2 will be released after kinktober

“… and he wanted to go back to his apartment, but obviously I refused and then he lashed out, saying I’m a prude and stuff, and it’s just so unfair” You were on your friends’ bed, there were many bottles of beers discarded on the floor. It was typical for you to hang out like this, talking about everything and anything. “I mean, it’s not like I am some type of prude-“

“Y/N, you are”

You widened your eyes, surprised, then shot Barty a dirty look. “Am not, thank you very much”

Evan rolled his eyes. “Oh, come on, stop lying to yourself and admit it. When was the last time you did something adventurous?”

You rolled your eyes, but, if you had to really think about it, you couldn’t find any examples: maybe they were right, maybe you had become a prude. Still, you couldn’t let them win. “I’m drunk and my brain isn’t co-operating, but there are plenty of examples.”

“Prove you’re not a prude, then.”

You scrunched your eyebrows. “How?”

They both exchanged a look. “How about a little game? You’re going to watch our next game from here, in our apartment: for every goal that we score, you’re going to take off a piece of clothing. If you run out of them, you’re going to tie yourself up, and you’ll be waiting patiently for us here, on our bed. When we’ll come home, we’re going to have free access to whatever part of your body is exposed”

You sat up straight, staring at them, your mouth agape. “What- What”

Barty chuckled. “Evan, I think we broke her. We understand, Y/N, you’re not that adventurous, it’s okay, it’s normal”

You felt your blood starting to boil, you never were the one to back down from a challenge, and you weren’t going to start now. “Okay, bets on. You’re going to score two goals maximum, anyways”

They exchanged a surprised look. “We’re going to see about that.”

You just turned up the tv, anxiety clawing at your stomach. Sure, they couldn’t score that many goals, right? It was nearly impossible; you were going to be just fine. For the first time, you wished their time would loose.

As they started to fly on their brooms, you saw Evan scoring the first goal. Hell, not even a minute had passed.

“And just like that, Rosier scores the first point…” You tuned out the speaker’s voice, seeing how Barty and Evan shared a smirk, the camera focusing on their high five.

“Okay, Y/N, it’s a single piece of clothing” You took off one of your socks.

But as the game went on, you found yourself quickly only in your panties and bra, feeling extremely nervous, praying for them to stop scoring points.

It wasn’t that they both weren’t extremely hot, the prospect of them both focusing on your body making you feel hot and bothered; no, it was the fact that you hadn’t experienced any sexual interaction in more than two years, and, even worse than that, you didn’t know how you would have reacted after the sexual intercourse. When they were finished with you, would you be feeling clingy? Would you develop a crush on them? What if you already were crushing on them?

Before you could pity yourself more, Barty scored another goal, followed by Evan, and you swore you could see them winking at the camera. With shaky hands you took off your panties and bra. Now you had to deal with the damned ropes.

At a certain point, you had fallen asleep, tied up on their bed. You startled awake when you felt a hand caressing your stomach, your eyelids fluttering quickly.

“There she is, our angel”

“Evan?”

He chuckled. “What a good girl, doing what she was told to do. Hope you’ve slept well, because the night has just begun. If it gets too much or you feel uncomfortable, say ‘red’ and we will stop.”

As you were about to reply, you felt a tongue licking up a stripe from your hole to your clit, making you whimper. Barty smiled up at you from between your thighs. “Look at you, so responsive. We’re going to have so much fun”

Evan kneeled, staring at your eyes, his gaze dropping to your mouth before dipping his head to kiss you. You moaned; he smiled in the kiss. “Sounds so cute”

“Rosier, get your ass down here and taste her” The blonde guy rolled his eyes, obeying to Barty. Suddenly, two tongues were feasting on your core, the stimulation making your brain turn to mush. “Oh, God, what the fuck”

The boys chuckled. “Yes, sweetheart, tell us how good we make you feel” You felt their tongues meeting over your cunt, then they stopped giving you attention. As you looked down, you saw them making out sloppily directly over your core, seeing them like that was probably the hottest thing you had ever seen.

You whimpered, catching their attention. “You like seeing us like this, don’t you? Naughty, naughty girl” They went back to focusing on your pussy, and you already felt really close to coming, your moans getting progressively more high-pitched.

“Are you going to come on our faces like a good girl, mh?” As soon as Barty inserted a finger in you, curling it upwards, you knew you were gone for. You let out a loud moan, your mind fuzzy, filled with fireworks and fucking rainbows as they worked you through it.

As soon as you came back, you saw in the corner of your eye Evan undressing, and suddenly you felt uncomfortable. “Yellow” They both focused immediately on you.

“What’s up, sweetheart? Do you want to stop?”

“No, but” You felt embarrassed to tell them this, but you knew you had to. “Thing is, I haven’t done anything in a while, and” You didn’t know how to continue, but they seemed to understand.

“It’s okay, we can go as slow as you can, do you want us to undo the ropes?”

You blushed furiously, shaking your head. They both exchanged a look. “Oh, so you like them, huh? Going to keep this in mind in the future”

You didn’t have time to make sense of the innuendo, because Barty was starting to pump his fingers into you, making you moan. He curled them, hitting a specific spot into you, making you mewl. “Evan, I think I found it” He proceeded to caress it repeatedly, working you up once again, but suddenly his fingers were gone, making you whimper in disappointment.

“I know, Barty’s so mean, love” You felt Evan’s dick at your entrance, he was dragging it up and down slowly, making you feel crazy with need. He put in just the tip, staying there for a minute or two, making you feral.

“Evan, please, pleasepleaseplease, I’m going to be good, just” You weren’t even controlling your words anymore, you just knew that you needed him inside of you, and you needed him now.

“Are you hearing this, Barty? She’s going to be good” He mocked you. “What if I stayed like this?” You whined; you would have pushed it in yourself if you weren’t fucking bound. He kneeled down, kissing your nose and entering you altogether, your breath catching in your throat. “Just kidding, you’ve been such a good girl, it wouldn’t be fair to punishing you”.

Once he started picking up the rhythm of his thrusts, Barty slightly slapped your cheek with his cock. “Open up, sweetheart” You did, starting to suck on the head of his dick, hollowing your cheeks, looking up at him innocently. “Fuck, Evan-“ You sucked him even harder, making him whimper. “Fucking hell, I won’t last”

“Neither will I” Evan called out from between your thighs. “She’s so fucking tight, it’s a miracle I haven’t come already”

You were a moaning mess, Evan was somehow capable of hitting all of the right spots, you felt your mind starting to black out as you came on his dick.

“Switch” You widened your eyes as the two boys switched places, the prospect of possibly coming again in such a short period of time making you squirm. Barty entered you with one violent thrust, making you loose your breath.  He positioned his index and middle fingers on your clit, making you mewl. “You’re going to come on my dick like a good girl”

You shook your head, Evan giving you a break to speak. “I… Can’t, it’s too much”

Barty cooed at you in fake sympathy. “Awe love, you have to get used to it, just because you’ve been with little boys who can’t make a woman come, doesn’t mean you won’t start now. You will come on my cock, and you will enjoy it” His words were making you even wetter, when he started attacking your G-spot you knew that you were gone for, coming all over him, both og the boys following you.

As you were cathing your breath, Evan started undoing the ropes, while Barty wetted a washcloth and started cleaning you. He smiled up at you. “Guess you aren’t a prude, after all” You scoffed, pushing him away slightly. tags: @sxmnc @peterparkerspersonalplaything @riaaavm @iamawkwardandshy @eeviee4 @mysterialee @famouscrusadeluminary @el1smells @rishofkf @mooonyxoxo @happymaeday @yourfiendlyneighbourspiderman @whyshouldihaveanam3 @amazing-bobinsky @barnesandmetal @just-here-for-ff @remussbitch @sammyreid

[crazyunsexycool]

My Little Love

Chapter 38

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x enhanced!Reader

Word Count: 6.4K

Warnings: I don't want to add to many warnings and give away the plot so read with caution, Henry and Charlotte being the sweet little duo they are, crying

A/N: the time has finally come to see what's going to happen next with our favorite family.... Idk how to feel about this chapter but it needed to happen so we can keep moving forward.

Series Masterlist:

Henry laid awake after you left. He worried about you. Even at his young age he could tell something was not quite right with the way you had been behaving. He also didn’t like the fact that his dad didn’t know you’d be going on a mission. 

There was only one thing he could do and he only hoped you wouldn’t be mad at him. But Henry would rather have an angry mama than none at all. So he slipped out of his bed and Lottie’s grip on his shirt so that he could put shoes on. 

“Bubba?” Lottie’s sleepy voice called from behind him. “Whe-uh you going?” 

“I have to do something for mama.” 

“You call daddy?” 

Henry sighed and turned to look at Lottie, she was now sitting up in bed and rubbing the sleep from her eyes with the back of her hand. 

“Yes. I think mama is going to need help.” 

“I go with you?” Lottie asks, getting out of bed. 

“You should stay here with grandpa.” 

Lottie shakes her head. “I go with you.” 

“Fine, go get your shoes and be as quiet as you can.” 

“Kay.”

Henry meets Lottie in the hallway. He takes her hand and turns them both invisible before quietly going down the stairs. In the living room Eddie has the tv on even though it’s still dark out. His head is tilted backwards resting against the back of the couch while he snored peacefully. Henry places a finger of his lips to make sure Lottie knows she needs to be quiet. They leave out of the front door.

“Ok baby, I’ll give you a piggyback ride because we have to be fast.” Henry tells his sister before turning and lowering himself. 

Lottie climbs on Henry’s back and locks her legs around her brother’s midsection. Her arms wrap over his shoulders. 

“You ready?” 

“Am weady.” Lottie says with a nod.

“Ok, hold on tight.” Henry says and he starts running towards the compound.

****

They knock furiously on the door to the communications room. It’s only after a few minutes that it swings open. 

“Hi Ms. Maria.” Henry looks up at Maria Hill who’s in charge of running the operation from the comms room. 

“Henry, what are you two doing here? Where’s Y/N? Is Lottie having another vision?” 

“No but I need to talk to daddy. It’s important.” Henry’s eyes are pleading and Lottie is matching him. 

“Ok, come in but you’ll have to wait, they’re still on the mission. I’ll let you talk to him as soon as I can.” Maria says, opening the door wider and ushering the kids in. 

It takes a few minutes but eventually they hear Steve’s voice crackle through. 

“Mission was a success. Everyone’s back on the jet and we’re on our way home.”  

The small group in the room cheered. Maria heads to one of the stations and speaks to the person manning it before picking up the mic and headphones. 

“Sergeant Barnes, please switch to channel 3.” She says. 

“Everything ok Hill?” 

“I’m not sure, Henry needs to speak to you and it couldn’t wait.” Maria says before handing the mic and headphones over.

“Daddy?” 

“Hey bubs, what’s going on? Where’s mama?” Bucky tried not to let his panic be heard in his voice. 

“Mama went on a mission. She told me not to tell you but baby had a vision about it and I’m worried. Baby said there was a mean lady.” 

Bucky sucked in a sharp breath. It couldn’t be who he thought it was but he also had to trust your judgment. 

“Daddy?” 

“Hi doll. Can you tell me who you saw?” 

“Daddy it was mama’s mama. I membuh fwom my biwthday.” 

Bucky pinched the bridge of his nose and tried to take some calming breaths but that was only getting attention from the team. 

“Do you know where she went?” He asked anyone who was listening. 

“She took a jet Barnes. We are sending you the location now.” Hill jumped in. 

“Thank you, Hill. Kids, is grandpa watching you?” 

“Yeah.” Henry said quietly after taking the mic back. 

“I’m assuming he doesn’t know where you are. Please go back home. I’m gonna go help mama and I’ll see you later. And don’t tell grandpa anything about this, it’s a secret for now.” 

Both kids say their goodbye and the line drops. Hill tries her best to give them a reassuring smile. The kids leave and sneak back into the house and Henry’s room without their grandpa ever noticing they were gone. 

“Well it took you long enough to come find me.” Your mother says. She has a pleased look on her face as she takes a seat. “Did you finally come to your senses? Or are you going to kill me?” 

You stare at her for a moment, really taking her in. It’s alarming to realize that this is who she always was. She had never hid herself behind the role of a sweet and loving homemaker, at least not in front of you. 

“I’m not going to kill you.” You say calmly. 

“Still weak I see. No matter, we can work that right out of your system this time.”

“Yeah, how will you manage to do that?” 

Your mother’s smile is sinister. It sends a shiver down your spine. 

“Do you really think I didn’t know you were here before I walked in? You tripped an alarm. At any moment my backup will be here.” She laughs as if she’s won, as if she has the upper hand. “I have so many plans for you. Things I didn’t get to finish the first time round.” 

You smile back. From one of the pockets of your utility belt you pull up four different dog tags, all of them covered in blood. 

“You mean the idiots that live down the hill? I mean, lived down the hill. I paid them a visit first and I cut the alarm in the cabin just in case there was anyone else wandering around.”

Lorraine’s face morphed from smug to absolute rage. She was fuming and you were satisfied that you’d managed to catch her off guard. 

“What were you planning to do with Luke and the twins? Were you going to kidnap them? What about Olivia?” You ask, you motioned to the files on the coffee table. 

“I’ve had to come up with backup plans. Since you’ve been nothing but a disappointment.” She spat with all the fury she had. She stands and tries to loom over you but the tactic doesn’t scare you anymore. “You would’ve been dead if it wasn’t for me. I gave you the only thing that makes you special.”

“You’ve done nothing but abuse me. You are a sick and twisted person.” 

“And you’re an ungrateful brat.”

Her right hand came up to strike you across the face but you blocked and batted it away before pushing her back. It was hard enough that she tripped and fell over the coffee table taking some of the files with her. Metal ropes slithered across the area rug from you to her. They wrapped around her arms, neck down her back and around her waist, lifting her back onto the couch. The now solid metal kept her in place. 

“For as much as you loved to call me pathetic, look at you now. You’re nothing. Hydra is nothing.” You growled, standing up from your seat. 

“Hydra will rise again. It always does and they’ll come for you and your stupid little family. We will have what is rightfully ours again.” 

“No! Hydra ends with you. It ended a long time ago you and the rest of those maniacs were just grasping at straws. You are nothing, no one will ever remember you because you didn’t do anything great.” 

“I am the greatest mind Hydra has.” Lorraine screamed, writhing as she tried to break free. With each movement the restraints got tighter. 

“Then why did they send you to have babies for them? You were useless to them. You had no purpose your own father thought that.” 

She stopped moving. Lorraine was panting as she stayed still, eyes closed. 

“Your father didn’t think you were anything special. You were ordinary, just one of the bunch. He thought the world of Henry though, didn’t he? Same thing with Lottie. They were his pride and joy. He saw them as the true future of hydra. They were everything he wanted in a child. Before he died he even treated them very well. But you? You were the disappointment of the family. He had no use for you, at least not until you got pregnant. I read all about what he thought of you. How he was glad to finally get rid of you so he could focus on what he had created.” You say. Your voice is eerily calm, it sounds strange to your own ears. There’s a sense of satisfaction in watching the woman who tormented you for years breakdown. You lean down into her space and look her in the eye. “How does it feel that even your own husband and children would prefer them over you?” 

 She lets out a blood curdling screech. “I did what I had to do in order to prove my loyalty. You would be nothing if it weren’t for me and this is how you repay me? You wouldn’t have your precious family and your precious Bucky if it weren’t for me.” She grits out. “The things we did to him. The way he cried and screamed and begged. He was such a great little play thing. Almost as fun as you were. But it doesn’t matter, once I’m done with you I’ll get my hands on him and those snot nosed brats and then I’ll really make them suffer. I’ll make you watch so you learn what I’m capable of.” 

That had you seeing red. It was bad enough to understand what they went through but to hear it from your own mother’s mouth made you sick. Instinctively the metal you were holding her back with tightened even more. She gasped for air before she began laughing. It was bone chilling and sinister. 

“I-I knew you h-had...” She begins but cuts herself off by coughing. “Had it in you.” Blood pools in the corners of her mouth as she finally looks at you. Her eyes are bewildered, as if she finally had gotten what she wanted.

“What?” 

“You we-re always me-meant to be the p-p-perfect killing machine.” She stutters before she laughs again. “We are the same, we-we are both killers now. The p-p-pride of Hydra.” She cries what you assume are happy tears. “O-our lega-legacy w-will live th-through you.”

As you realize what she meant you gasp. The metal that had been restraining her falls to the ground in small round pellets. She lay motionless on the couch. Some blood drips from her nose and mouth. 

You fell to the ground. Your eyes stuck to your mother’s motionless body. How could you have done that? Sure you had killed before but it had been in self defense. This time you let her get under your skin like she always had. You thought you had the upper hand but she played you. How would you tell your family?

**** 

You spent a few hours in a daze. Unsure of what to do. You didn’t even realize there was movement in front of you until two hands wrapped around your neck. 

“Weak and pathetic. You couldn’t even finish the job. I didn’t suffer through childbirth and family holidays and school and those stupid recitals and sport games just for you to quit on me now.” Lorraine, your mother was choking you. Part of you didn’t know if you should fight back. It was so surreal. “Do it. Turn into what I made you.” 

You scrambled to your feet in an effort to have the upper hand. Her grip was tight, nails digging into your flesh. You slipped your fingers in between her hands and your neck. The look on her face was terrifying. She sneered, her eyes almost black from rage. You weren’t sure where she got the strength to hold you down.

“Stop.” You hissed.

“Make me.” Lorraine leans in, her face inches away from yours. “We could rule the world. There is so much you’re capable of and I can teach you. You are meant to be the new fist of hydra. You’ll bring us into a new age but only if you give in.”

“It doesn’t have to be like this. You don’t have to do this. I can get you help, you can see our family again. Do you really not care about them? Hydra doesn't care about you but we do.”

Lorraine scoffs. “No one has ever cared about me. You don’t have to be a lost cause. You just can’t see what I do. The world could lay at our feet, we could rule everything. We could be the most powerful people in the world. Why must you settle if you were made for such a great purpose? You could influence the ways of the world, hydra could continue to live through you.” She states. It’s all she cares about, the power and influence. She was a lost cause long before you were ever even born.

You stare her down for a moment and shake your head. “Hydra dies tonight. If it has to die with me, then so be it.”

Lorraine lets out a mixture of a groan and a screech of frustration. One of her hands lets go and she reaches behind her. You put your focus on the metal that is lying around and pull it towards you in order to use it to defend yourself. Lorraine holds a blade and brings it down toward your chest.

Pop.

Pop.

Pop.

Three quick gunshots. Two to the heart and one to the head. Lorraine’s eyes widen for a second and then she drops at your feet. From the darkness of the hallway Bucky steps out, gun still in hand. 

“Are you ok?” He asks hesitantly. 

You nod. “It’s over.” You murmur in disbelief.

Bucky rushes over when he sees the tears in your eyes. He doesn’t hesitate to bring you in for a comforting hug as you start to sob. 

“It’s ok, Sugar. I got you.” He murmurs. 

It took you some time to compose yourself. But in your defense you had gone from thinking you killed your own mother to her trying to kill you to your fiancé killing her instead. You didn’t even want to hurt her, that hadn’t been your intention at all. 

“Let’s get out of here.” Bucky didn’t give you a chance to protest. He manhandled you and took you outside. 

Taking gulps of fresh air, you began to cry again when you saw Steve standing a few feet away. Bucky pushed you in his direction before going back to the cabin. 

“Are you hurt?” Steve’s words are dripping with concern as he makes his way to you. “Whatever you need, I’m here for you.” 

You didn’t answer. No one you knew had ever been in this position so they wouldn’t understand. You watched as Bucky walked out with your mother’s body wrapped in a blanket. He was gentle with her as he set her down and headed back inside. It made you want to throw up and you did. Steve held you up, offered you a bottle of water from a bag he had been carrying. It didn’t stop the sick feeling in your gut.  Bucky walks back out with all of the files in hand. 

“Let’s go.” Bucky says, handing Steve the files and trusting he’d help you back to the jet while taking the responsibility of carrying your mother. 

You sat quietly in the jet. Every few minutes you’d look to the side and see your dead mother laying there. The more you looked at her the angrier you got. Everything she’d put you through was just for power.  

“Hey,” Bucky called softly as he sat next to you, blocking your view. “How are you feeling?” 

“I don’t know. Sad? Angry? Relieved?” 

Bucky’s hand cups your cheek, his thumb moving back and forth. You can see the sadness reflected in his eyes. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to do that but when I saw that knife I had to act fast.” 

“It’s not your fault, you were only protecting me and I’ll always love you for that.” You say quietly before turning your head and kissing the palm of his hand. “How did you know I was here anyways?” 

“Henry went to Hill and asked to talk to me, he told me everything. He was worried about you. Lottie had a vision of your mom. Hill tracked the jet.” Bucky responds. “We had the team redirect here. Steve over there just had to join me to try and steal my thunder.” 

“Hey, she was my friend before she was the love of your life.” 

You give him a small smile. Steve gets up from the pilot’s seat and sits across from you. He pats your knee reassuringly. 

“Bucky told me about your mom. I’m sorry you went through all of that. Especially when it was someone that was supposed to protect you.” 

You give him a small nod. There wasn’t  much you could say. Your thoughts were on how and exactly what you were going to tell your family. The relationship you had with them could change forever in the next few hours. 

“Everything will be ok. I’m staying right by your side.” Bucky murmured as he pulled you in. 

Steve and Bucky looked at each other for a moment, a silent understanding that they’d need to be there for you. While Bucky held you Steve went back to the pilot’s chair. It would be a few more hours until you got home and then you’d have to face your family.

You turned the corner into the long hallway that led to many conference rooms with determination. Towards the end of the flight you’d decided that what’s done is done. Lorraine had made her choices and you’d made yours. The only thing you could do was tell your family the truth and give them the evidence you had and let them decide what they wanted to do. You couldn’t control their reactions but you could control yours.     

Halfway down the hallway Henry and Lottie sat outside one of the rooms. Their feet kicked back and forth as they waited. Lottie was mumbling something and patting Henry on the arm in a comforting manner. It made you genuinely smile to see them like this. 

Lottie saw you first and jumped off her seat in order to get to you. Her arms open wide, her pink teddy bear in one hand. Lottie launched herself into your waiting arms. You pulled her close and even gave her a little squeeze. She rewarded you by peppering kisses over your cheek. 

“You is kay mama?” Lottie asked once she pulled back. Her finger traced your cheek, up and over your brow and down your nose before ending the delicate touch with a small ‘boop’. 

“I am more than ok now my sweet Angel.” 

She smiles when you lean down and kiss her forehead. Your attention then turns to Henry who is standing not too far from you. The telltale signs of his nervousness present as he fluctuates in his invisibility. You reach out for him and he slowly makes his way to you. As you hold him, his form stays visible and he relaxes into your hug. 

“Mama, I’m sorry I know you di-“ 

“Never apologize for doing the right thing.” You cut him off while pulling away to look at him. “You followed your instincts and it was the right call, ok?” 

Henry nods before giving you one more hug. 

“Can you stay out here with your sister while I talk to our family?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Thank you, sweet boy.” 

You stand and take a deep breath. It was now or never. You had asked Bucky to make sure your family was at the compound by the time you got there. Steve was still with you when you walked in the room but he stayed in a corner, he was there more for moral support than anything else. 

With Bucky’s help you managed to get the blood off of you but you didn’t look great. Eddie was the first one out of his chair to hug you. Luke, Sofia and Josh followed soon after before settling back down in their chairs. You sit across the four of them and you feel sick to your stomach knowing what you have to do. 

“So before I start you have to know that what I’m going to say is very serious. I’m not joking about this situation. It’s going to be difficult to understand and even accept but I have proof to back up what I’m going to tell you.” You take a deep breath. “I also need you all to listen to everything I have to say.” 

“Kitten, what is going on?” 

“I need to tell you about what happened to me when hydra captured me last year. Specifically I need to tell you about who was responsible for everything.” You say as you grab the laptop in the middle of the table and connect the usb with all the evidence. 

You look over at Steve and then Bucky. Both of them giving you a nod to reassure you that they had your back. With one more calming breath you turn back to your family and begin to explain everything.

****

“So our mom and her family were involved with hydra?” Sofia asked after everything was said. By the tone in her voice you knew she had trouble believing you. 

“Yes. They were involved for generations. They were responsible for Henry, Lottie and the other kids. They were trying to create a new generation of soldiers.” 

“And she had us with the intention of using us to create more soldiers?” It was Joshua’s turn to question you.

You can only nod in response. Meanwhile Luke sits silently as he looks through the files you had given him. One for him, Molly, Olivia and their unborn baby. In the margins were the plans Lorraine had for them. 

Next to Luke sat your father. It looked like he was going to be sick. It was one thing to learn that your wife had treated one of your kids differently but it was another to realize you didn’t know the monster you had married. As he read his own file and even glanced over at Luke’s, Eddie wished he didn’t know any of this. 

“Dad?” You called him softly, worried that he might actually be sick. Maybe his heart couldn’t handle this. 

“Y/N,” he said quietly. It hurt to hear him call you by your name and not the affectionate nickname he had given you. “Why didn’t you tell us sooner?” 

“I was scared. I didn’t have enough evidence and I needed for you to believe me. Especially after I was taken. She was power hungry and she was willing to do anything to gain control of hydra.” 

“But you could have said something to me.” 

“Would you have believed me?” You ask. “Would any of you have believed what I said after I was rescued? I had been mentally and physically tortured. My autonomy had been taken from me. Anything I said at that time would have been questionable.”

Your family didn’t say anything. The tension was slowly rising in the room and then the one question you didn’t want to answer was asked. 

“Where is she now?” Sofia asks. 

You take a deep breath and close your eyes. The pain you felt from her death would surely be different than theirs but part of you still felt the loss in some weird way.

“She’s gone.” 

“What do you mean? Did she escape or something?” Joshua speaks up. 

Joshua and Sofia had been treated the best by her. Maybe she had found a little bit of maternal love for them in the cold and twisted heart she had. 

“No, I mean she’s gone, she died.” You deliver the news as gently as possible.

The truth hangs in the air and for the first time since reuniting it feels like your family is broken again. Your eyes stay glued to the table as you wait for their reactions. The only comfort you have is Bucky’s hand in yours. 

“You killed her.” It wasn’t a question or an accusation. Eddie just came to the realization much more quickly than your siblings had. 

“How could you kill her? She was still your mother.” 

“I-It’s complicated. I only wanted to bring her in. I gave her a choice.“

“But you killed her.” Sofia accuses.

“I killed her.” Bucky speaks up and everyone’s attention turns to him. “It was a life or death situation and I had to choose between Lorraine and Y/N. I did what I had to do to protect Y/N.” 

“You couldn’t have knocked her unconscious or something?” 

“She was choking Y/N. If I didn’t act fast this would be a completely different conversation.” Bucky defends himself. “Y/N’s safety was my priority. I’m sorry I really am but I did what I had to do.” 

Sofia gets up first, followed by Joshua and Luke. They take the files you gave them and leave, not saying another word to you. It crushed you to see how Lorraine had broken your family. Finally Eddie gets up and starts to walk out. 

“Dad?” 

“Let me handle this, I’ll talk to you soon.” Your father says and follows your siblings. 

Bucky pulls you into his chest. He comforts you while you cry. He whispers sweet reassurances as he guides you out of the conference room. The kids follow as Bucky takes you home. 

Bucky had ushered the kids into the playroom before pulling you along to your shared room. He didn’t say much as he helped you undress and sent you in to take a shower. Once you walked out Bucky got you into bed. He’d offered to stay with you but you wanted to be alone so he gave you space. 

It had been a difficult few days. Bucky could see the worry and anxiety grow with every moment that you didn’t hear from your father. You paced, you zoned out and you slept, nothing else. Not only was Bucky worried but so were the kids and the team. He’d even taken over making the final decisions on some things for the wedding. Not that he minded but he missed the excitement in your eyes as you talked about how great the day was going to be. All Bucky could do was be there for you, hold you while you cried and reassure you that you did nothing wrong. He shouldered the burden of having killed your mother so that you wouldn’t feel guilty about it for the rest of your life. But if you asked him, he’d do it again as long as it meant that you were safe by his side.

The kids also saw how down you were. They missed their mama. It was actually Henry’s idea to do something to cheer you up. So while you’d been sitting outside at Bucky’s insistence, he and the kids prepared a surprise for you. When you walked into your room you were surprised to find Henry and Lottie running out of your bathroom giggling. 

“What are you up to?” You asked with a small smile for the first time in days. 

“You’re just in time mama. Come look.” 

Henry takes your hand and pulls you into your bathroom. You find Bucky putting some finishing touches to a bubble bath. 

“What is going on?” You ask while looking around at the lit candles and bathtub. 

“We wanted to do something special for you.” Henry says before holding his hand up for you to see what he’s holding. “You can even use my boat so you don’t get bored.” 

“An my duckies mama.” 

You turn around to see Lottie holding up her little basket of rubber duckies. Most of them are dressed as the Avengers, your own duckie included. You wanted to cry again. For as much as you worried that your siblings hated you again, your family was right there showing you all the love you could ever need.

“The-uh you go mama.” Lottie says after dumping the duckies into the bath. 

Bucky ushered the kids out before telling you to relax and giving you a quick kiss.

****

Downstairs Bucky, Henry and Lottie rushed around trying to get another surprise ready for you. This had been Lottie’s idea. She had seen what happened and had been distraught but having you home eased her worries. Now all she wanted was to see her mama happy. 

“Hold this here.” Bucky held up a string of lights for Henry.

“Like this?” 

“Just like that bubs. Doll, grab that pillow and put it over there.” Lottie rushed around doing as she was told. 

The three of them freeze when they hear the door to your room open and close.

“It’s not weady.” Lottie looked at Bucky, panicked.

“I need like a minute. Go distract mama.” Bucky tells Lottie and she rushes out of the living room. 

She finds you at the bottom of the stairs. 

“Mama wook ovuh the-uh.” She points to a random spot behind you. 

You turn to look at the wall and try not to laugh. Then you turn back to look at her with furrowed brows. 

“What am I supposed to be looking at?” 

“Uh,” Lottie looks distraught as she tries to think of something. “It’s just so pwetty?” 

“The wall is pretty?” You say teasingly while looking back at the blank wall. 

You hear whispering but you can’t see where it’s coming from so you assume Henry is just invisible. Lottie looks up at you and smiles. 

“Kay mama come on.” She takes your hand and pulls you in the direction of the living room. 

You stop in your tracks when you see the lights and pillow fort. Bucky and Henry stand in the middle of the room smiling at you. The tv was on and an episode of the Golden Girls was ready to go. 

“Is this for me?” 

“Yeah.” Lottie nods as she looks up at you. “It’s a suwpwise. I don’t wike it when mama is sad.” 

That alone made you want to cry again. Instead you scoop Lottie up and hug her while walking towards Bucky and Henry. They join in on the hug and then you all find a comfortable place to sit. 

Lottie stays on your lap, Bucky sits next to you on the floor while Henry lounges on the couch behind you. He has his arm hanging over your shoulder. Even Alpine joins in for cuddles. The show plays but you can’t focus on it. All you can do is think about your sweet family and the fact that they’d do anything to make you happy the same way you'd do it for them. So you sit back and enjoy the moment pushing all the bad memories from the last few days out of your mind. 

The sun was starting to set as you were all still sitting together in the living room. You’d changed the show for a movie while the kids did some coloring. Your head was resting against Bucky’s shoulder as you yawned. Bucky was just about to suggest calling it a night when the doorbell rang. 

“Who the hell could it be at this hour?” Bucky mutters as he stands and makes his way to the door. 

There’s a hushed conversation before Bucky walks back. Behind him is Eddie. You tense and immediately you turn your gaze away from him. The kids, who usually ran towards their grandfather, stayed put. Everyone could feel the heaviness in the air. 

“Can we talk?” Is all your father asks so you get up and lead him outside to the back porch. 

Both of you sit in silence side by side, not knowing what to say. His expression was unreadable. It was one of the few times he ever concealed his feelings from you.

“How are they?” 

“How are you?” 

You asked at the same time. Eddie looked over at you, taking in your profile. He could see the tension in your shoulders and the way you clenched your jaw. He could see how exhausted you were. 

“Kitten.” Eddie said softly and you finally looked at him. You had never seen him look this tired or defeated. 

“How are they?” 

“Upset, confused, angry.” 

You nod and look away. “I’m sorry for not saying anything but you have to understand why I did what I did.” 

Eddie pats your shoulder before pulling you in for a hug. This time you don’t cry though. You’re done crying over this. 

“Kitten, I’m not blaming you.”

“They are. And I get it, I do. I’d also understand if you did too. She was your wife and you were together for so long.” 

“That woman was not my wife.” Eddie says. His tone is sad but resigned. “I was married to a stranger my whole life. She was a great actress though, I’ll tell you that much.”

You didn’t reply. What could you possibly say to him to ease the pain he was surely feeling? 

“Lorraine brought this on herself. As long as you tried to bring her in, alive, you have nothing to feel guilty about. She wasn’t a good person, kitten. I can see that now. You did what you had to do as an Avenger trying to protect innocent people and then as a mother trying to protect your family. You gave her a choice and she chose wrong. That doesn’t fall on you.”

“Thanks dad.” You say between quiet sniffles. He hugs you tighter. “As long as you don’t hate me.” 

“I could never hate you, you’re my girl.” 

You close your eyes and smile. He’s told you that all your life. The two of you sit in comfortable silence, holding each other and watching the sunset. 

“The funeral is tomorrow.” He said quietly, long after the last rays of sun had disappeared. 

“Oh.” 

“You should come, be there for your siblings. I think it could be good for the four of you.” 

“It wouldn’t.” You pull away from him. “She was their mother, not mine. I think I would just make it worse by showing up.” 

Eddie nods. “I understand, Kitten. I thought I would offer just in case. But don’t worry, your siblings will come around soon. They love you all.” He pats your thigh before getting up. 

You have one question. But you aren’t sure if you should ask. If it’s even appropriate. But seeing as your father knew you well, he stops before opening the door and turns to you again. 

“I hope this doesn’t change anything for the wedding. I’d still love to walk you down the aisle.” 

You look up at him, tears in your eyes and a smile on your lips. You give him a small nod. Eddie gets closer again and places a kiss on your forehead and leaves. 

Inside, Bucky meets Eddie at the bottom of the stairs after putting the kids to bed. Eddie stretches his hand to Bucky who seems surprised at the gesture.

“Thank you for bringing her back.” 

“Of course. I know it must be hard on Luke, Joshua and Sofia to just accept the death of their mother and not be able to bury her.” 

Eddie looks at Bucky confused before shaking his head. “No, I meant Y/N. I knew you’d keep her safe.” 

“With my life Ed. Listen about Lorraine- I really didn’t-“ 

Eddie raises a hand to stop Bucky. “You don’t have to explain yourself, you were protecting our girl, that’s all that matters. From what I’ve read in those files, she had it coming. If you hadn’t done it Lorraine would have kept coming after her. You not only kept Y/N safe but the rest of my family.” Eddie places a hand on Bucky’s shoulder and looks him in the eye. “You protected our family. Never apologize or feel guilty about it.” 

Bucky only nods understanding that Eddie was including him as part of his family.

“To be honest, and I mean this in the best way possible, I’m glad it was you that did it and not her. She would have carried that guilt for the rest of her life.”

“I’d do it again, if I had to.” Bucky reassures the man in front of him. 

“Good. Well I’ll get going now. See you at the wedding.” 

Bucky smiles and nods, following Eddie to the door and closing it behind the older man. When he turns he sees you walking around and turning off lights before making your way towards him. He smiles as you throw yourself into his arms. 

“Let’s go to bed.” He says softly, feeling as you take a deep breath and exhale. 

You practically melt against Bucky as you nod. Bucky kisses the top of your head as his hold on you tightens. He doesn’t let you go, instead Bucky leans down and hooks his hands around the back of your knees. You wrap your legs around his waist as he makes his way up the stairs while carrying you to your shared room. 

Bucky lays you down and you laugh while he tucks you in. “Do you want me to read you a bedtime story?” 

“Shut up and get in bed.” 

“I keep telling you this is where Charlotte gets her attitude from.” Bucky mutters as he takes off his shirt and settles beside you. 

You laugh as Bucky pulls you closer. With a sigh you lay your head on Bucky’s chest. 

“Is everything ok?” He asks.

“I guess. The funeral is tomorrow.” 

“Do you want to go?” 

“No. I’m done with everything that has to do with Lorraine. I have more important things to focus on.” 

“Yeah?” Bucky looks down at you and smiles. “Like what?”

“Like marrying the love of my life.”

“Well that does sound like it’s super important.”

“It is.” You snuggle closer to Bucky. “I can’t wait to marry you.” 

“I can’t wait either, Sugar.” 

Ch. 39

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Love's Second Chance: A Holiday Reunion - Chapter 6

Summary: Negan gets a proper introduction to Y/N's children, attempting to get to know them. Joel finds out about it and he's not too happy to hear about the time that his children are spending with the man from his past.

Characters: Negan Smith, the reader (OC), Joel Miller, Elizabeth, Peter, etc.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/60501985/chapters/155201419

Warnings: Swearing, angst, bickering, dirty talk, etc.

Notes: Thanks again to those that read the story. This chapter has both boys in it again. I think they are both in most of the chapters from here on out.

“Hello?” Elizabeth’s voice called out when she entered her mother’s home. Instead of just barging in like she had done the night before, Elizabeth wanted to make her presence known. Thankfully when she entered the home she lived at with her mother, the Christmas decorations were lit up alerting her to the fact that her mother was most likely awake. It was morning and something smelled incredible. Moving further into the house, she entered the kitchen to see Negan and her mother making breakfast together laughing. Just seeing the two of them like that had Elizabeth stepping back. With how happy the two of them looked it reminded her of what her parents had been like when she was little. It had been a long time since she saw her mother laugh like that. Negan was behind her mother, his arms reaching around her to help her finish whatever they were cooking. An uneasy breath fell from her throat when Negan stole a quick kiss from her mother. “Mom?”

“Oh hey honey,” Y/N was surprised to see her daughter, turning to face her to show that she was still wearing her pajamas. Negan was in a pair of gray sweatpants and a black tank top that Elizabeth assumed used to be her father’s that her mother loaned him. She didn’t know how she felt about that. “We were making breakfast for all of us.”

It had been a long time since she had seen her parents making breakfast together like that. Smiling, laughing and working together. It was shocking to see and what was even more mind blowing was how happy her mother looked with Negan. For that small moment she remembered what it was like when she was young with her mom and dad, but it had been a long time since they had been that happy together.

“Hey kiddo,” Negan nodded over toward the kitchen table where scrambled eggs and some fresh fruit were already prepared. “We’re making the sausage gravy right now and the biscuits will be out of the oven in a minute.”

“I didn’t know you could bake and cook,” Elizabeth gazed upon Negan who gave her a cheesy, big smile.

“There are a lot of things that you probably don’t know,” Negan winked, going back to working on what he was doing on the stove. “I like to be a man of mystery sometimes. It keeps things interesting.”

“He says that, but once you get him talking, he won’t shut up,” Y/N teased, reaching out to poke at Negan’s ribs. It had him laughing, arching away from her and Elizabeth was surprised how quickly these two seemed to be at ease with one another. A loud snort fell from Negan which involuntarily made Elizabeth laugh. “See, he’s no heartthrob. He’s just a massive dork.”

“I’m heavily offended,” Negan asserted, placing his hand in over his chest to feign being hurt by the comment. Looking back at Elizabeth again, Negan nodded his head about dramatically. “Actually, your mom is right. I have a big mouth and I talk way too much. I just tried to keep my private life away from the public. No baseball fan wants to hear that their favorite player loves to bake.”

“You’d be surprised,” Elizabeth commented, stepping forward to look at the things that Negan and her mother were working on. “Do you need some help with something?”

“We’re almost done here. Unless you want to grab some juice from the fridge for everyone?” Y/N asked of her daughter, stepping forward to place a quick kiss at her daughter’s temple.  

With a nod, Elizabeth went to grab some glasses. Putting them on the table, she spun on her heel to go for the refrigerator. Stopping, she looked back again hearing Negan humming a song out loud. Watching the two of them together had a lot of mixed emotions flooding through Elizabeth. Elizabeth had only met Negan last night and he was a stranger to her. Just someone she grew up watching on the television. But with her mother? It looked like Negan had known her for a lifetime with how comfortable they were together. Playfully Negan nudged Y/N with his hip and it had her giggling.

Shaking off the feeling that she was experiencing, Elizabeth opened the fridge and grabbed the juice. Closing the door after she pulled it out, she headed back for the table and poured some into each glass. Setting the bottle at the center, she then headed to take a seat for herself.

“Are you okay with me cutting open the biscuits and putting the sausage gravy on top of them?” Negan confirmed with Elizabeth, looking back at her with his big hazel eyes. Quickly she nodded clearing her throat uneasily when he went back to finishing things up.

It seemed like Negan did her plate first and handed it to Y/N to give to her before going back to working on the last two plates. Y/N carried the plate over to the table, scooping some of the scrambled eggs out of the serving bowl that was at the center of the table. And then went to grab two regular pieces of sausage for Elizabeth.

“I don’t mind doing that,” Elizabeth offered, holding her hand out. There was a bit of color in Elizabeth’s face and it made Y/N smile that her daughter was embarrassed.

“I’m sorry sweetheart, I’m just used to being your mother and taking care of you,” Y/N lowered the plate down for Elizabeth to finish gathering what she wanted. Pushing the individual bowl of fresh fruit closer to Elizabeth, Y/N also put the other two bowls where her and Negan would be sitting.

“Oh! Don’t forget about the blueberry muffins we made,” Negan snapped his fingers pointing toward the blueberry muffins that were cooling on the counter. It made Elizabeth smile when she realized how big this breakfast was turning out to be.

“You didn’t have to do all of this for me,” Elizabeth stated and it made Negan’s eyebrows bounce up when he turned to face them holding his and Y/N’s plates in his hands.

“I was just really hungry,” Negan insisted with another big, cheeky smile moving toward the table to set the plates down. Turning back, he grabbed some of the muffins and set them at the center of the table. “I’ve already eaten two of these and trust me, they are better when they are warm. So I’d have one if I were you.”

Nodding, Elizabeth reached out to grab one of the muffins to set it beside her plate. Noticing the way that Y/N was smiling at Negan when he took his time sitting down still was weird for Elizabeth. It was nice seeing her mother happy, but this was new and this was fast.

Starting off with the muffin, Elizabeth took a bite of it and was pleasantly surprised how good it tasted. Then again, her mother was always a good baker so she wasn’t sure how much of it was Negan and how much of it was Y/N.

Swallowing down her food, Elizabeth looked between Y/N and Negan while she poked at her food, “I don’t want to sound rude or ungrateful, but do you mind if I ask the both of you what is going on here?”

“Breakfast?” Negan spoke with a mouthful of one of the blueberry muffins that he had grabbed. Even if she didn’t want to laugh, there was something about the facial expression that Negan had that made her giggle.

“That’s…that’s not what I mean,” Elizabeth tried to hold herself together at how simply put Negan said that. Setting her fork down, Elizabeth knew that this was something that was actually important so she wanted to give the two of them her full attention in this moment. “I mean between the two of you. I only just found out the other day that the two of you were really good friends. And then suddenly Negan Smith is in our home and the two of you look like something out of a romance film.”

That comment had both Negan and Y/N looking to each other. Color flooded into Y/N’s face and a smirk tugged at Negan’s handsome features, “Are the two of you dating?”

“I wouldn’t say that,” Y/N looked to Negan who was allowing her to answer the questions since Elizabeth was her daughter. “We just had a date last night and the two of us are enjoying being around each other right now. Negan is only going to be here for the holidays and we…”

“Missed each other,” Negan finished for Y/N with a charming smile that made some color flood into Elizabeth’s cheeks. Hearing them talking about each other like that was pretty hard to comprehend and take in for her. “I understand how this could be uncomfortable for you Liz and if you have any questions about me…or us…I’m willing to answer them.”

“What did you call me?” Elizabeth demanded with Negan’s long eyelashes fluttering. Looking to Y/N, Negan seemed to panic before looking back again. “Did you call me Liz?”

“Your mother said you wanted to be called Liz when we were talking about you last night. I just thought…” Negan stuttered, clearing his throat uneasily. By her reaction to him calling her that, he thought that Y/N’s daughter seemed angry. “I’m sorry Elizabeth.”

“No, I’m okay with being called Liz. I’m just surprised you know my name,” Elizabeth liked that someone she had looked up to for so long actually knew who she was. “I don’t mind you calling me Liz. It’s hard for me to think that you know about me.”

“You were one of our biggest topics of discussion last night and this morning. Of course I know your name,” Negan assured her letting out a sigh of relief since he thought he had done something wrong originally. “I mean what I said though. Any questions you have, I’ll answer.”

Pushing her hair back over her shoulder, Elizabeth gave a nod. Dropping her hands down at her sides, she curled her fingers around the edge of the seat and sighed, “Did the two of you have sex?”

Hearing that so bluntly asked had Y/N choking on what she had in her mouth. Instead of being offended, Negan just seemed to laugh at how quickly that was brought up.

“I’m sure he’s okay with you asking questions, but nothing like that,” Y/N pled with her daughter knowing that Elizabeth probably could answer that herself after everything. The truth was that they had slept together multiple times during the night and the morning, but she wasn’t about to tell her daughter that. “Please.”

“Maybe we can keep the questions non-pornographic?” Negan requested, teasing Elizabeth in the moment. A tiny snort fell from him again and the color grew back into Elizabeth’s cheeks. Embarrassment flooded throughout her veins realizing that was probably too much of a question to ask. But Negan did seem rather amused with her bluntness instead of being offended. Elizabeth’s brown eyes seemed to want to avoid meeting his stare now. “You’re still a kid after all.”

“I’m not a kid,” Elizabeth was quick to correct Negan, not wanting to be viewed as a child in the situation. Smirking, Negan gave a nod of his head and Y/N pushed her chair a little away from the table.

“You’re still my child and you’re not eighteen yet,” Y/N reminded her daughter of things, reaching out to extend her hand to place it in over Elizabeth’s. Squeezing softly at her hand, Y/N wanted to show that she supported her daughter but still wanted to stress that she wasn’t an adult yet.

“Then can I ask if you want to date my mom?” Elizabeth looked to Negan again after Y/N pulled her hand away. Reaching for the fork that she had put down, Elizabeth started to poke at the scrambled eggs while Negan chewed. Negan’s thick eyebrows bounced up with a muscle flexing at the corner of his jaw. “Like are you calling yourself her boyfriend or something?”

“I don’t think we’ve really talked about that yet,” Negan responded the best way he knew how. “We’re just two people that used to be close and we’re enjoying each other’s company while I’m here.”

“You won’t hurt her?” Elizabeth questioned and she felt like she sounded like a parent right now instead of a teenager who was meeting their celebrity idol.

“I don’t plan to,” Negan stated with a shrug of his shoulders looking to Y/N who was gazing back and forth between the two. “I hurt your mother a long time ago by letting our friendship slip through my fingers and I want to make up for that.”

“So I should expect to see more of you then?” Elizabeth confirmed with Negan. Nodding his head while he swallowed down his food, Negan looked to Y/N for confirmation. “More than just Christmas time?”

“I’d hope so,” Negan took another bite of his breakfast, waving his fork about afterwards. “With my schedule, I’ll do my best. I’d like to get to know her better along with you and your little brother. I should have been here all along to do that.”

“So…does that mean you want to be like our dad now?” Elizabeth wasn’t sure how to take that. Immediately Negan shook his head.

“No, I don’t ever expect to take the position of your father. I know the two of you have a good relationship with him,” Negan felt odd talking about marriage, dating and all of this when it was just the first night they spent together. Only more so because he didn’t want to rush things. He felt comfortable with Y/N, but he didn’t want to scare her away. “You both sound like awesome kids and I’d just like to get to know you more.”

“Dad told me that mom wanted you to be my godfather,” Elizabeth recalled what Joel had informed her of the other day. Maybe it was stupid to mention it, but after Joel said it, it had been lingering in her mind for days.

“And I wish I would have been around to have that opportunity,” Negan stressed, his Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat. Looking to Y/N, a large amount of empathy seemed to flood into Negan’s features knowing that was something Y/N wanted. “I would have been so lucky to be your godfather.”

“It would have given me awesome bragging rights,” Elizabeth added eliciting a loud laugh from Negan with her response to it. “Seriously. Could you imagine? Me getting to go around and tell everyone that you were my godfather? People would be so jealous.”

“Who is your godfather?” Negan wondered looking between both Elizabeth and Y/N.

“Uncle Tommy,” Elizabeth was quick to answer, shrugging her shoulders at the idea of it. “It still blows my mind that you were so close to my parents. When my dad said you were best friends, I didn’t believe it. Then he told me you were closer to my mom.”

“Well, your Uncle Tommy is a good man,” Negan conceded, taking another big bite of the food that was on his plate. Waving his fork about, Negan thought back to when they were children. “Your mother was always my best friend. I can’t remember how we met, but we were together all the time. And then your dad and your Uncle Tommy moved to town and they just became part of our group. After your mother knocked out a bully for Tommy, we were pretty much inseparable.”

“Dad told me about that,” Elizabeth couldn’t help but laugh and it had Y/N lowering her head to bury it in her hand. “I can’t believe you beat that kid with a hockey stick!”

“Your dad did not tell you that!” Y/N seemed offended, dropping her hand down so fast that it smacked against the table. Warmth flooded into Y/N’s features at the idea that Joel told their daughter about how she attacked someone. Both Elizabeth and Negan were laughing at her response. “I hit him once with the hockey stick just to get him to let go of your Uncle Tommy!”

“It echoed throughout the entire street,” Negan reminded Y/N, setting his fork down for a moment. Acting like he was holding a hockey stick, Negan made a popping sound when he pretended he was hitting someone with it. Groaning out, Y/N dropped her head down into her hand again. “And as soon as he dropped your Uncle Tommy, the fists started swinging.”

“Dad said you beat him so bad that he wouldn’t tell anyone because you were a girl and he was embarrassed,” Elizabeth added to the conversation drawing Y/N to drop back against the seat. Folding her arms in front of her chest, Y/N shook her head slowly. “Dad said he was afraid of you after that.”

“Your mom could kick some serious ass,” Negan alerted Elizabeth evoking a glare from Y/N when she looked to him. Throwing his hands up, he couldn’t help but laugh at the situation. “I mean it. No one fucked with you because you would whoop their ass. You were a badass.”

“It’s so hard to picture you like that now,” Elizabeth was amused to hear about that side of her mother. “You really had a lot of fire in you, huh?”

“I did,” Y/N admitted, tipping her head from side to side. She never lied to Elizabeth before so she wasn’t going to start now. “I had a problem with people being assholes. Especially since the boy bullying your Uncle Tommy was my age. It pissed me off. If someone was an asshole, I would put them in their place no questions asked. But I don’t condone that behavior now of course.”

“I think it’s cool,” Elizabeth responded with another amused sound. “Knowing you were a badass does make things more interesting.”

“Your Uncle Tommy thought he was the biggest bad ass being part of our group. He was five years younger than me and your dad. And he would get to hang out with people our age. All the kids his age were jealous of him. Or scared I guess,” Negan thought aloud, reaching for another blueberry muffin. “If someone stepped out of line, they would have had to deal with one of the three of us.”

“I wish that wouldn’t have changed,” Elizabeth sighed loudly, entertained at the idea of it but sad in a way that she missed out on that.

“Yeah, me too,” Negan dropped down his hand to place it in over Y/N’s knee. Patting it a few times, Negan squeezed gently and then smiled when Y/N lowered her hand to place hers over his.

“I’m still going to throw some shade at you about stealing those bragging rights away from me,” Elizabeth pushed, almost in a joking tone when she went back to eating.

“What can I do to make up for it?” Negan questioned, pulling his hand out from underneath Y/N’s. Tapping his hands over the top of the table brought Elizabeth’s attention back to him. Stretching out his arms, he threw them up in the air. Elizabeth didn’t know how to respond to that. “What can we do now to give you bragging rights?”

“Careful,” Y/N warned Negan knowing that her daughter might have a field day with what he was asking. Rubbing his hands together, Negan didn’t seem to mind whatever would be thrown his way. He wanted to make a good impression with Elizabeth. He made that very obvious.

“If she wants to show off to her friends somehow, we can do whatever,” Negan allowed that idea to be thrown out there, waving his hand about as he spoke. “I dropped the ball when it came to being her godfather, so if I can make up for it some other way. I’d like to.”

“Bullshit,” Elizabeth stammered causing Negan to laugh out loud. While Elizabeth picked up a lot of her father’s features, the expression she just made reminded Negan so much of Y/N when she was younger.

Truthfully? Looking at Elizabeth also had a shit load of emotions flooding throughout Negan. Back when they were younger, Negan could have never pictured Joel and Y/N having a child together. But, here one of them were. And she really did seem to be a mix of both of her parents. Negan picked up on it so quickly.

“Well, I mean within reason of course,” Negan stressed, biting down at his bottom lip knowing that it was best to throw that out there just in case. Y/N still thought this was brave, but she was waiting for Elizabeth’s response. “You know, to make up for the way things went down.”

“Can I take a selfie with you and post it on my socials?” Elizabeth pushed, a range of excitement flooding into her younger features. Looking to Y/N, Negan wanted her to give him a silent answer to make sure it was okay with her first.

“They aren’t going to show up at our house wanting to do the same, are they?” Y/N inquired seeing her daughter immediately shake her head. Even if they did show up at the house, Elizabeth would assure them that they wouldn’t because she wanted this.

“I mean Lydia might want to meet him, but she’s my best friend so…” Elizabeth stressed looking between the two of them. Getting up from the table, Negan moved around it and knelt down beside Elizabeth. Allowing Elizabeth to take a photo of the two of them, he noticed that she was posting it on something saying she was having breakfast with ‘the’ Negan Smith.

“You’re still such a teenager,” her mother smirked, reaching out to squeeze her hand in over her daughter’s wrist noticing that Elizabeth got a bit embarrassed at how she reacted. Hearing the notifications going off on her daughter’s phone made Y/N look to Negan who gave her a wink. Successfully, Elizabeth got what she wanted. Bragging rights.

Getting up, Negan went back to his seat in attempts to finish his breakfast. Instead of looking at her phone, Elizabeth pushed it forward on the kitchen table and looked between them. There was a sense of pride that ran through Elizabeth after the move she pulled.

“Your mother tells me that you play softball,” Negan changed the subject for a moment after taking a big bite of one of the biscuits that was covered with gravy. “She says you’re really good at it. Did you want to go professional with it?”

“Professional? Probably not,” Elizabeth answered, her eyes falling to her phone that once again buzzed. Y/N felt like her daughter was probably desperate to see who it was but she was trying to act levelheaded in front of Negan. “It’s not the same for women like it is men. But it has been helpful with college. I can still play when I’m in college. Do something I love while also focusing on my education.”

“That’s very smart,” Negan applauded her for her decision, snickering when her phone vibrated again. “We’ll have to throw a ball around one day. See how strong of an arm you got there.”

“That’d be really awesome. I’d like that,” Elizabeth confessed with a huge smile.

This was really something special to Elizabeth and Y/N knew that. This was someone Elizabeth looked up to and he was treating her extremely good. It actually impressed Y/N with how good Negan was being around her daughter. It was their first day back with spending a lot of time together and he was already taking on the job of making her daughter feel comfortable around him. That made Y/N happy and showed that Negan meant what he said about things.

“Does dad know about this?” Elizabeth broke the silence that had fallen upon them for a while so they could eat their breakfast. Even though she was very happy about everything and geeked out, she couldn’t help but let her father linger on her mind.

“Which part?” Y/N didn’t know how to respond because there was a lot going on.

“That the two of you are spending time together?” Elizabeth spoke before going to eat some of the breakfast that they made for her.

“If he didn’t, he sure does now,” Negan pointed toward Elizabeth’s phone, giving a half smirk. “Unless he doesn’t follow your socials.”

“He doesn’t,” Elizabeth was quick to answer Negan with a shake of her head. In fact, it made her smile because one thing about Joel was that he absolutely hated the internet. Social media didn’t make much sense to him and while Joel was good at most things, he wasn’t incredibly good with computers. “He doesn’t really like technology things. He’s not very good at them. Mom is always having to fix his laptop for him because he just doesn’t…get it.”

“Your father knew that I was going on a date with him last night,” Y/N was honest with her daughter wanting to be as open as she could possibly be with her.

“And he was okay with that?” Elizabeth was curious and it had Y/N looking down toward her plate. Poking at her food, Y/N knew that Joel had been on her mind all night, but with Negan here it wasn’t the time or place.

“Baby I love you,” Y/N began, speaking softly so that she didn’t seem to have any anger toward Elizabeth or Joel from the start. “And while I care a lot about your father, whether he’s upset about us spending time together or not is not really something I want to stress about.”

Was she scared about Joel’s reaction to things? Of course. It was something that Y/N had thought about all night after she had slept with Negan the first time. There was no questioning that Joel would be furious with her for sleeping with Negan. Deep down she knew that. All she could do was compare both Joel and Negan all night long. But if she worried about Joel’s response? She was never going to be able to relax.

“Your father dated Tess off and on for years,” Y/N reminded her daughter, not wanting to sound too angry about things. “And not once did someone ask me if I was okay with it because at the end of the day, it wasn’t my place to be angry or accepting of it. It was your father’s life and he was doing what he wanted.”

“You’re right,” Elizabeth had taken a moment to think about what her mother said. There wasn’t much more that she could say really because she was aware just how true that statement was. So she went back to eating.

A moment later Negan nudged Y/N with his arm to get her to look at him. With a nod of encouragement he was letting her know that he thought her answer was a good one. It was nice knowing that Negan had her back to let her know that she didn’t fuck up in that moment. His wink told her that.

“Are you really retiring because of your knee?” Elizabeth stammered after a few moments of silence and it had Negan lifting his head. Arching his eyebrow, Negan’s expression was confused where she was going. “I’ve just seen people talk on the internet about why you were really retiring. You’ve hurt your knee twice. Everyone knows that. But the whole sticking around for another season thing. Does that mean your knee is good enough for you to keep playing?”

“Yeah, I’m retiring because of my knee,” Negan replied, swallowing down hard when his career was brought to the table. “When I hurt my knee the first time I was told that I shouldn’t have gone back. But I did. I loved the game too much. And then I hurt it the second time. I just don’t think I ever felt the same again after that injury. I’m slowing down and I was told that I was going to have to get surgery on my knee again. But I’m putting it off. I wanted to have one last go before I retired officially. I’m getting older anyways and I should stop before I’m no longer good at what I do.”

“Most people play until they suck,” Elizabeth brought up other players hating to hear that his retirement was legit.

“I can’t be that person,” Negan spoke honestly realizing that he had thought about that a lot too. “I don’t want to be forced to quit because I’m so bad. I want to go out while I’m still good at what I do. Where I’m still at the top. Because then I can have a final year where people still love me. I’ve seen some of the much older guys overstay their welcome and instead of being supportive, the fans turn on them. I don’t want that to happen with me.”  

“Can I see your knee?” Elizabeth wondered, her brown eyes getting big with Negan snickering. She was hopping all over the place, but it amused Negan. It was typical for a young kid to be scatter minded when someone they looked up to was around. He was used to this over the years he had been a baseball player meeting fans.

“It’s just a knee,” Y/N chuckled but Elizabeth shrugged. With another smirk, Negan stood up from the table and moved in beside Elizabeth. Bending over, he rolled up the pant leg of the sweatpants. Pretty quickly, she turned in her seat to observe Negan’s knee. You couldn’t miss the scars from Negan’s surgeries but it didn’t look as bad as Negan clearly thought it did.

“I would have killed that guy that purposely did that to you,” Elizabeth snorted with an angered sound, sliding back into her seat. “Everyone knows he did it because you were destroying them. With you on the team, there was no losing. Plowing into your knee from behind? That was such a shitty thing to do. And what did it get him? He’s no longer playing. And you still are. Fucking loser he was.”

“Elizabeth!” Y/N was surprised to hear her daughter talking like that which had Negan amused as he rolled his pants back down over his leg.

“I’m not a child anymore! Plus, that’s what dad said back then too!” Elizabeth defended herself, placing her hand in over the center of her chest. “I learned everything I know from him. We watch sports together all the time. That guy that hurt Negan was a fucking loser. If he wanted to win, he could have done it fair and square instead of going after the best player on the team like that.”

“I don’t really know what to say,” Negan began, heading back over to his seat to sit down. “Unfortunately, injuries like mine are the most common for a lot of baseball players. It could have happened to me at any point, but it was sad that another player did that to me purposely.”

“Did you at least punch the guy out?” Elizabeth begged for some kind of answer which had Y/N looking to Negan.

“I wanted to, but my wife did instead,” Negan huffed hearing both the girls laugh. “If you remember that game, it caused a huge fight on the field. The coach on the other team forced that guy to apologize to me as they were loading me into an ambulance. My wife was at the game and when he approached us, she just full on right hooked him. Hit him so hard that she broke his nose and there was blood everywhere.”

“Your…” the smile slowly faded from Elizabeth’s face when she tore her stare away from Negan and to her mother. “Your wife? I forgot that you were married.”

“I was,” Negan stressed his words, reaching for the necklace that he wore to bring it forward to show the wedding rings that were there. Worry had filled Elizabeth at that point because she was obviously nervous that her mother was spending time with a married man. “She passed away a few years ago.”

“That…that makes sense,” Elizabeth frowned, setting her fork down. Guilt started to eat away at her. By the expression over Negan’s face it had upset him some talking about his late wife. “I remember you talking about her all the time when I was little and then you didn’t. That’s probably why…I’m sorry…I shouldn’t have brought that up.”

“You didn’t know,” Negan lowered his necklace back down, outstretching his hand to give Elizabeth’s hand a firm squeeze.

A buzzing filled the air drawing all of their attention to Elizabeth’s phone seeing that it was Peter calling her. Instead of answering, Elizabeth kept eating and there was a certain smirk that was over Elizabeth’s face that said she knew Peter was calling about Negan. The call ended and then Peter started calling her again which had Elizabeth avoiding it once more.

“Elizabeth,” Y/N called out to her daughter seeing that there was amusement across her daughter’s face. “You’re teasing your brother.”

“You know just as much as I do that he’s going to call me a few more times and then he’s going to call you,” Elizabeth suggested pointing at the phone. Peter called one more time before Y/N heard her cell phone ringing on the counter. “See. You better be prepared because once Peter knows that you are here he is going to want to come over here to meet you too. And if you think I talk too much, wait until he is here.”

“I’m okay with that,” Negan gave the go ahead with a nod when Y/N pushed her seat back to go head over to grab her phone. “The only thing I have to do later is go to my mother’s house for dinner. But if the three of you want, you can come with me. My mother loved your mother. So I think she would be excited to see her.”

“You’d let us meet your mother?” Elizabeth seemed shocked that Negan was so willing and open to include them in his life.

“It’s not exactly a good thing,” Negan teased Elizabeth with a wink. “She is my mother after all.”

“Yep. Peter is coming home immediately,” Y/N hung up her phone causing Negan to snort. “He’s desperate to meet you too.”

“I just invited you and the kids to come with me to my mother’s house tonight for dinner,” Negan adjusted Y/N’s chair so she could sit down in it easier. “That’s if you want to.”

“It’s supposed to be Joel’s time with them,” Y/N responded having Elizabeth hush Y/N from speaking any further. “I’m just saying I don’t know how your father would feel with you spending one of his days with us instead of with him.”

“We’ll go to dad’s house after the dinner, but do you really think it would be cool for him to turn away time with my favorite athlete?” Elizabeth desperately wanted to be around Negan more and it was obvious. An amused rumble of a breath fell from Negan’s lips before he went back to eating. “And you know that Peter is going to eat up most of Negan’s time when he gets here.”

“As long as I don’t get in trouble with your father for it?” Y/N rambled on, looking to Negan who gave her a smile. “Then I’m completely okay with it.”

----

Well today did not go how Y/N thought it would. At first it did. Peter came home and he immediately was full of questions for Negan. Peter snacked on some of the cupcakes and muffins that they had made while they all sat together to talk in the living room. Which was really just Elizabeth and Peter asking Negan hundreds of questions that he tried to answer for them. It was mostly about baseball and being famous, but he answered every single one of them. It surprised her how much patience Negan had for them. But she appreciated that he did.

The day went by quickly and before she knew it, it was time for them to go to dinner at Negan’s mother’s home. Even though Negan’s mother was someone she grew up with, she wanted to make a good impression with her. So they all got dressed nicely. Both her and the children. Because Negan didn’t have any clothes at her house, he just put on what he had worn the night before with her for their date.

What was surprising was learning where Negan’s mother lived. She still lived in the childhood home that Negan grew up in. For some reason, she thought that Negan’s mother moved out of that home when Negan’s father passed away. Then again, she really lost all contact with Negan after they stopped being friends. Maybe she publicly ignored things with Negan’s mother to force herself not to care about him anymore.

There were two problems with coming to dinner here. The first? Negan’s childhood home was right next to her parents’ home. The reason Negan and Y/N were so close is because they were neighbors. They were never too far from each other. After Y/N had gotten pregnant with Elizabeth, her parents had kicked her out of their home. They wanted her to get an abortion and she refused. So they wrote her off completely. And that never changed. It had been over eighteen years since she had spoken to either one of her parents. That didn’t mean she didn’t try though in the past. They lived in the same small town after all. There were moments where she saw them and tried to interact with them. Get them to realize that they had grandchildren that could use them in their lives, but they didn’t care. Nothing broke down that wall they put up after they cut her off completely. Elizabeth and Peter never met any of their grandparents. All they ever knew was their parents and Tommy. So being next to her parents’ home? Yeah, that was really uncomfortable and brought back painful memories.

The less painful, but just as uncomfortable thing was that Joel and Tommy’s home was down the street. The reason they were all so close as children was because they lived by each other. Joel’s parents’ home was down the street from them. That was the first home she shared with Joel. They lived their together until they both could afford to move to the home that she lived in now. After they got divorced? That was the home that Joel moved back into with Tommy who was still living there at the time.

A lot of her fears were put to rest when they got here though. Negan’s mother welcomed her with open arms like there was no time gap between. How Negan’s mother treated her back when she was a child was the same way she did now. She was welcoming, friendly and very sweet. The children really seemed to like her and vice versa. Negan’s mother treated Y/N like she was still that girl that lived next door. And she was very doting on both Elizabeth and Peter.

Considering Peter and Elizabeth never had grandparents, they actually seemed to cling to Negan’s mother while they spent time there. It wasn’t often they got attention from others. So they were eating it up. Also, they were both just so incredibly excited to be spending time with Negan. They had to stress that like every five minutes. Which Negan no doubt liked. They always made him laugh and smile. That was nice to see.

During dinner a snowstorm started. One that they weren’t really prepared for. It was a heavy one that the weather channel was reporting as dangerous to be outside in. It would be impossible for her to drive home. And that meant she was stuck here.

And right now? The four of them sat together on the couch in the living room watching Christmas movies together. Negan’s mother had set them all up with desserts before going to bed for the night. Before she made sure Y/N knew that she had set the guest room up for Y/N to stay for the night.

They were two movies in at this point. And surprisingly the children had managed to stay quiet during the movies. Well, that’s what Y/N thought at least. Especially since they had been talking Negan’s head off during the rest of the day.

“I think Peter is drooling on Negan,” Elizabeth finally spoke up, interrupting their silence to draw attention to Peter. Tired himself, Negan looked beside him to gaze at Peter. Peter’s head was resting on Negan’s shoulder, his deep breaths were filling the air. “He is such a child. Eats a ton and then falls right asleep. He’s like a baby.”

“I don’t mind,” Negan snickered, reaching up with his left hand to rub at his tired eyes. “When I was his age I used to pass right out if I was sitting by a warm fire after eating a bunch of treats and a big dinner. So I can’t say I blame him. It’s getting late anyways…”

“Let’s not pretend you wouldn’t like to be sleeping on Negan,” Y/N teased her daughter hearing Elizabeth groan out and cover her face. Negan’s laugh followed and Elizabeth shook her head.

“It’s kind of creepy now. Isn’t it?” Elizabeth eyed over Negan and Y/N who were seated at the middle of the couch holding hands. “If you would have told me the two of you were this close? I would have never let the celebrity crush get so big. Trust me, the crush is slowly leaving.”

“Slowly?” Negan’s eyebrow arched in amusement drawing Y/N’s daughter to grow red. Falling back against the couch, she pulled her legs up against her chest and it made Negan giggle. “It’s okay. I crushed on my mom’s friends when I was younger too.”

“You’re not just her friend,” Elizabeth was quiet in the way she spoke because she didn’t want to draw Peter’s attention to what she knew about Negan with their mom. “So yeah. It’s a little creepy and it will be gone soon. I’m forcing it to go away.”

“I’m sorry,” Y/N frowned and Elizabeth held her hand up to stop her mom from going forward.

“Don’t worry about it. Let’s just try to erase from our minds that I crushed on him,” Elizabeth made a disgusted expression. Negan attempted to hide his laugh and Y/N nudged him with her shoulder. They were having small amounts of fun teasing her about it, but at the same time she actually understood why it would make her daughter uncomfortable. It was a tense situation. “Dad was right. It was weird for me to be crushing on someone his age anyways.”

“It was innocent,” Negan suggested with a shrug of his shoulders trying to not make Elizabeth feel even worse about things.

There was a knock on the door, interrupting their time talking and it made Negan look back over his shoulder. Looking at the time, Negan grumbled under his breath and sighed loudly, “Who could be here this late at night?”

Adjusting Peter, Negan was careful in the way that he moved. He didn’t want to wake Peter up since he seemed to be really out cold. Helping Peter to rest against the arm of the couch instead, Negan didn’t rush it. Watching Negan being so good with her son took Y/N’s breath away. It was nice to see.

Tip toeing toward the door, Negan unlocked it and started to slowly open it up. A moment later the door was pushed open firmly with a huff escaping Negan’s throat. Being pushed aside, Negan stumbled back and grumbled under his breath when he realized who it was, “Please Joel, come in.”

“Joel?” Y/N repeated what Negan said, her heart skipping a beat. Sitting forward on the couch, her eyes grew wide when Joel stepped in beside the couch. His glare locked with hers and it was very obvious by the expression over Joel’s face that he was angry. “Hey.”

“Hey,” Joel scoffed, shoving his hands into his pockets. Back at the door, Negan was closing things up. Tension flooded the room with Joel’s dark eyes locked on Y/N’s as if he was waiting for something from her. A thin layer of snow was covering Joel from the snowstorm that was still undoubtedly going. “It’s my night with the children. So I came to pick them up and walk them home.”

“We were just finishing a movie dad,” Elizabeth acknowledged, nodding toward the television. Side stepping, Joel looked to the television to eye over what was on the screen. A muscle was flexing at Joel’s jaw that had Y/N ill at ease. That was definitely a sign that he was angry. And she wasn’t really sure why. “Do you want to finish it with us?”

“No, I don’t,” Joel felt the warmth of someone moving in behind him and he quickly shifted to allow Negan to move in beside the couch. Looking down, Joel saw that Peter was sleeping heavily and he shook his head. Snapping his fingers, Joel expected it to wake Peter up, but it wasn’t working. “Buddy?”

“Just let him sleep?” Negan recommended, nodding over toward the chair that was in the corner. “I can pull the chair in closer, you can sit with Peter and we can keep watching the movie if you’d like? I can grab you a cup of hot chocolate, let you warm up. My mother made this dessert that Y/N and the kids really liked so I’m sure you’d enjoy it. Maybe after the movie you could wake Peter up and…” the sound of Joel clapping his hands together firmly echoed throughout the room causing Peter’s head to shoot up. The sound had scared him awake and Negan sighed loudly. “Or not.”

“Dad?” Peter’s dark eyes blinked a few times trying to register what was going on. Rubbing at his eyes, Peter yawned and forced himself to sit up straighter. “What are you doing here?”

“The snow is really starting to come down. And it’s getting late. I wanted to come get the two of you before it was too dangerous for you to walk home,” Joel explained, outstretching his hand toward Elizabeth. Confusion flooded her young features with Y/N placing her hand in over Elizabeth’s knee. “Come on Ellie, it’s time to go home.”

“Joel. It’s a few houses down. I’m sure they would have been fine,” Y/N couldn’t help but think there was more going on here. Especially with how angrily Joel stormed into the house. “And if it got bad, they could have just stayed in the guest room with me.”

“Why would they do that when they have their own bedrooms just a few houses down?” Joel’s southern drawl grew angrier. Beside Joel, Negan seemed uneasy as he pushed his hands into the pockets of the dark slacks that he was wearing. Narrowing his eyes, Negan kept his stare on Joel while Joel rocked back and forth on his feet. “That doesn’t make a lick of sense.”

“How did you even know we were here?” Elizabeth blurt out, curious to know what led Joel to coming here in the first place. Silence filled the room until Joel looked to Peter. And in that moment? Everyone else looked to Peter too. Innocently shrugging his shoulders, Peter threw his hands up in the air. “Pete?!”

“He asked what we were doing with mom and I was honest. I told him where we were. I thought it was super cool. I didn’t know I had to be quiet about it,” Peter defended himself throwing both of his hands to his chest. “I just texted him at the end of the last movie.”

“I should have been told to begin with,” Joel interrupted Peter, throwing his hand about. Connecting eyes with Y/N, Joel felt his heart hammering in his chest. “Why wasn’t I told where you were going? I think I had the right to know.”

“Because I don’t tell you everything Joel,” Y/N stood up from the couch finding this whole thing to be ridiculous. “Going to Negan’s mother’s house for a dinner so they could meet his mom didn’t seem like such a big deal.”

“I should be able to have a say in who my children spend their time with,” Joel snapped, pointing his finger out at her in a moment of anger.

“Dad?” Peter stood up from the couch hating to see that his parents were angry with each other. It had been a long time since he saw his parents acting like this toward one another. “We’re not babies anymore. We’re teenagers. I hardly tell you who my friends are. I just tell you where I’m going if I’m leaving. We were with mom. Nothing bad was going to happen.”

“And if you wanted us home, we could have just walked home ourselves,” Elizabeth added from where she was still seated on the couch. Right now she didn’t understand why her father was so angry. “It’s really okay.”

“It’s getting dangerous out,” Joel quickly changed his tune, lowering his hand at his side. Clearing his throat, Joel nodded toward the door. “I came here to make sure that the two of you got home safely. I was worried and I didn’t want either of you hurt.”

“Fine,” Elizabeth shrugged, still attempting to understand where all this worry came from. Standing up from the couch, she knew that they weren’t going to be able to finish the film. So before it got any more uneasy, she would just do what Joel wanted. Facing Negan, Elizabeth tried to gather words and it took a minute before she did. “Please thank your mom for us? It was an awesome meal. And it was a lot of fun.”

“Of course,” Negan gave a wink noticing that things got strange as soon as Joel entered the home. “I promise you she feels the same way.”

Back stepping, Negan pointed toward an area and gave a weak smile, “Let me go grab your jackets.”

“We’ll come with you,” Peter announced, waving Elizabeth beside him so they could follow Negan to the closet.

Watching Negan with his children, Joel grunted when Negan grabbed Elizabeth’s jacket. Holding it out for her, Negan helped her get the jacket on before doing the same with Peter. Both of them seemed lost in saying goodbye to Negan.

“You really should have told me this is what you were doing,” Joel whispered so that only she could hear him. “You didn’t tell me for a reason. And I think that’s shady. If I would have known…”

“You would have flipped out,” Y/N finished for him, her eyebrows bouncing up. Joel’s lips parted like he wanted to say something, but he just grumbled something under his breath. Folding her arms in front of her chest, she shook her head and couldn’t believe he came in guns blazing. “Just like you are now. You might want to cool it Rambo.”

Licking his lips, Joel’s eyes narrowed and he didn’t seem too happy with her, “They just wanted to spend some time getting to know Negan. I thought it was innocent, so, I let them. You know Negan and you know his mother. His mother was always amazing with us when we were younger. So don’t pretend like this home was somewhere dangerous for them to be.”

“Right,” Joel’s expression softened, his head nodding when he forced himself to look away from her. “You’re absolutely right.”

“Do you want me to grab some of the dessert that my mother made so you can take some home with you?” Negan’s voice interrupted the two of them, disappointing Joel with his presence.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. I eat enough sweets as it is,” Joel began and it looked like he was considering something. “Y’know, I think it’s going to be dangerous driving home tonight. How about you come with us? You can stay in the spare room.”

“My mother already set up the guest room here for her,” Negan informed Joel, moving in beside Y/N with a loud exhale. “I won’t let her drive home. She’ll be safe here. I promise.”

“I’m sure here she will be safe, but at my home, she will be with her family,” Joel attempted to assert his dominance in the moment. Instead of having an impact on Negan, it just made Negan smile. “And I think we’re all safer together.”

“I’ll be right down the street if something happens,” Y/N replied back, reaching out to grab a hold of Joel’s arm to get him to back down. Considering how loud Joel was breathing, it was making it pretty obvious to the children that it was getting awkward between all of them.

“Joel, do you think we can talk for a minute?” Negan requested pointing between both him and Joel. The expression over Joel’s face looked like an immediate fuck no, but when he looked to the children Joel’s features softened. Joel nodded and Negan gave a weak smile to Peter and Elizabeth. “You should go get some of the sweets that my mother made regardless of what your dad said. Christmas time is the best time to allow yourself to eat like a king. Let your dad have some of the dessert. I know my mother would be upset if I didn’t get you to do that. Take your time.”

Pressing his hand in over Joel’s shoulder had Joel pulling out from underneath Negan’s grasp as they headed for the door. Negan wasn’t wearing his suit jacket or his coat when he walked out into the heavy snow with Joel. They moved away from the door and onto the sidewalk with Joel turning on his heel to face Negan. Even though it was later, it was lighter outside with how much snow was falling. A few inches had fallen already and Negan could feel the chill all around him.

“What do you want Negan?” Joel’s hands fell to his hips where he waited to find out why Negan brought them outside to talk in the first place.

“It doesn’t have to be like this, you know?” Negan reasoned with Joel referring to the anger and tension that Joel was visibly feeling toward him. “The two of us were good friends too when we were younger. I’d like for us to have a friendship again if you’re willing.”

A long, uncomfortable pause surrounded them. Laughing apprehensively, Negan reached up to rub at the side of his face, “I’m willing to forgive you for what you did. This anger? Whatever this is? There is no need for it. I let go of the past. I don’t know where all this hostility for me is coming from.”

“You’re willing to forgive me? Forgive me for what?” Joel snapped, his face scrunching up in anger. Curling his fists at his side, Joel seemed disgusted with Negan. Tipping his head to the side, Negan’s thick eyebrows bounced up and he smiled uncomfortably. “I did nothing wrong.”

Standing his ground, Joel stepped forward and even though he was smaller than Negan he was doing his best to be intimidating.

“We both know that’s not the case,” Negan scoffed, the bridge of his nose wrinkling when he was referring to something that Joel obviously knew he was talking about. Making sure that it was only the two of them outside, Negan nodded his head about and sighed. “But like I said, I’m willing to forgive and forget it.”

“Are you? Since you’re the one that brought it up?” Joel sneered, shrinking the distance between them. It had a tiny smirk tugging at Negan’s lips and his eyes narrowed. “I reckon if you forgave me, you wouldn’t have mentioned it.”

“I was mentioning it because that’s clearly why you’re acting like this,” Negan attempted to reason with Joel, not liking how things were already starting off between them. A slight shove from Joel was felt at the center of Negan’s chest causing him to step back. Lowering his head, an amused sigh escaped Negan’s throat. “Okay Joel. Or you can blatantly hate me if that makes you feel better. I’d really prefer us to be friends. But I’m assuming that’s not something you’re interested in?”

“I know what you’re doing,” Joel warned Negan, stepping forward to shove Negan again, but this time it barely had Negan moving since he was prepared for it. “You’re doing this because of what I did. I can see right through you.”

“Can you? Because from where I’m standing you sound a little nuts Joel,” Negan threw his hand up in the air, shaking his head. “I’m not doing anything out of malicious intent. I didn’t come back to town with some kind of plan to fuck with you. I just came here wanting to see my mother and take a break from what I was used to. Then I ran into Y/N and we just clicked.”

“Of course you fucking did,” Joel snarled rolling his eyes and scoffing out loud. It infuriated him when it felt like there was a small inkling of hope between him and Y/N before Negan suddenly showed up. “You’re fucking with my family.”

“I’m really not,” Negan stressed gazing back over his shoulder at the front door that was partially opened. “Believe it or not Joel, I actually really like your family. And as I told you earlier, I would really like it if you and I could attempt to be friends again in some fashion.”

“You’re so full of shit it hurts,” Joel claimed with a hiss which had disappointment flooding Negan’s face. In that moment it seemed like the snow started to fall harder around them. “I’m not going to give you my blessing or decide that I’m okay with this because I’m not. I’m not okay with this Negan.”

“Well, that’s not really your decision to make,” Negan exhaled loudly, shrugging his shoulders. A fire was growing inside of Joel with the response that Negan gave him. Even though they were outside in the freezing snow, Joel felt like his body was ready to explode with how angry he was. “I’m sorry you want it to be like this.”

Turning on his heel, Negan stopped when Joel called out to him, “I do have to reiterate that I did nothing wrong. I shouldn’t have to apologize for what happened. I don’t regret it. I wouldn’t take it back.”

“I wouldn’t want you to take it back,” Negan brushed off what Joel was saying, giving another small shake of his head. “What happened? It was meant to happen. And I firmly believe that. You were meant to have your children. They are great kids. I really do believe that what was meant to happen, did. But what you did in the past? Well that just proved what a fucking asshole you really could be.”

“Yeah, I’m sure you’re man of the year,” Joel threw that out there getting disgusted with the way that Negan was talking about things. “I’m sure your wife was always happy, right?”

“Excuse me?” Negan muttered, turning on his heel with Joel’s eyebrows tightening up. That was the first moment that Joel saw any real anger coming out of Negan. The mention of Negan’s wife was something that obviously bothered him. “What do you know about my wife?”

“You’d be surprised,” Joel responded looking beyond Negan when the children started to move out of the house. It had Joel’s posture straightening up and he moved forward, slamming his shoulder into Negan’s who let out a grunt.

“Thanks for letting us come over Negan,” Elizabeth spoke loud enough to draw Negan’s attention to her. Even though things had gotten stressful, Negan tried to force those feelings away. Turning on his heel, Negan gave a wink. Rubbing his hands together, he attempted to warm his hands up. “I’m sorry about the…weirdness of everything.”

“Nothing I couldn’t handle kiddo,” Negan promised her with a weak smile, holding his hand out into a fist. Flashing her a big cheesy smile had Elizabeth smiling in return as she knuckle bumped him. In the background Negan could see that Joel was rolling his eyes, but Negan didn’t address it. Peter swiftly moved forward in beside Elizabeth holding his fist up as well for Negan to knuckle bump him. “And Peter. My dude, we’ll have to play some video games sometime.”

“I would die,” Peter emphasized his words eliciting a deep rumble of a laugh from Negan. “That would be awesome.”

“You’re awesome,” Negan rustled Peter’s dark hair before stepping back allowing Y/N to say goodbye to her children.

Outstretching his hand after Y/N was done hugging their children Joel hooked his fingers with Elizabeth’s and then grabbed Peter’s hand with the other. Moving to the door, Y/N watched as Joel back stepped with their children.

“The offer is still on the table. We have a place for you if you want it for the night,” Joel called out to Y/N, hoping to appeal to her somehow. “I’m sure it will feel more like home than this.”

“I’ll keep it in mind,” Y/N stepped outside, moving in beside Negan who looked both confused and angry with Joel. Taking a second to look them over, Joel shook his head and then started moving down the driveway with the children. They took their time walking to Joel’s house while Y/N reached up to stroke her fingers over the bottom of Negan’s neck. “What’d he say?”

“Nothing,” Negan lied, his long eyelashes fluttering when he looked to Y/N with a shake of his head. After being out in the cold, Negan felt a chill flooding his body and he stepped forward to wrap Y/N up in his arms to give her a hug. “I’m sorry if how Joel is toward me makes you uncomfortable.”

“I’m kind of used to Joel being grumpy toward everyone,” she half laughed burying her nose against the side of Negan’s neck. Hearing the sound of a car, she lifted her head up and felt her heart skip a beat. Next door, she caught sight of her parents pulling into the driveway. Stepping away from Negan, she felt a sense of optimism. It was Christmas time and it had been a very long time. By the way they were dressed, Y/N could tell that they had likely been to a party of some kind and were just getting back home. Moving forward, she was hoping to catch her parents’ eye and when she reached a certain spot, she did. Holding her hand up to wave once her mother caught sight of her, Y/N tried to offer up a smile. There was some kind of hope that was lingering there longing for something positive to happen. She should have known better. Immediately, a scowl tugged at her mother’s features when she realized it was Y/N waving to her. It was like a kick to the gut when her father stepped in beside her mother. His reaction time was even faster than her mother’s. Any hope that she had of rekindling a relationship with her parents flew right out the door as quickly as it had entered her mind. With a nudge, her father motioned her mother to move for the door. Neither one of them acknowledged her existence other than that expression of utter disgust. When her mother got to the door, she had looked back at Y/N once more. There was nothing soft in the expression. It was absolute loathing that she could see and it made her chest ache. After they made it inside their home, a pained sound escaped her lips. “Well that hurt more than I thought it would.”

“Fuck them! Do you want me to go say something?” Negan offered, stepping in beside her when she lowered her head and felt embarrassed for even trying.  When Negan had left, obviously, Y/N’s parents weren’t like that. So he couldn’t fathom why they would even act like this to begin with. The people he knew seemed to be very loving and caring. Sure, they wanted the best for their daughter, but kicking her out and shunning her completely from their lives? That was probably his biggest shock. “I can. You know I don’t mind putting people in their fucking places.”

“Don’t,” she placed her hand in over the center of Negan’s back hearing him sigh loudly because he wanted to do something. There was nothing he could do that would change their minds. They would just get angry with Negan and who knows what they were capable of these days. “They made up their minds a long time ago that they wanted nothing to do with me or their grandchildren. It just hurts. Every once in a while I get that reminder and it stings just as much as the day they threw me out.”

“I don’t get it,” Negan stated with a rumble, turning on his heel to look down at Y/N. “They have grandchildren that they want nothing to do with. Why?”

“They didn’t agree with me keeping Elizabeth. Peter they want nothing to do with by default,” she educated Negan on the past, her throat tensing up when she thought about the day her parents lectured her about her decision to keep Elizabeth. “They thought I was ruining both my life and Joel’s. I was the embarrassment for them getting pregnant when I did. I thought they’d break once they saw their grandchildren, but they never did. It’s just hard seeing them around town and having them pretend I’m some kind of stranger.”

“Fuck them,” Negan scoffed, reaching out to grab her shoulders to give them a supportive squeeze. “You’re already a better parent than they were. And you didn’t need them helping you for you to get that way. Your children love you. They will never have to want for anything because both you and Joel made sure that you were present in their lives.”

Instead of speaking, she reached up to place her hand in over Negan’s that was on her left shoulder. Hooking her fingers with his, she knew she’d be lying if she said that she wasn’t sad. There was a soft pull at her shoulder with Negan leading her toward the house. Closing everything up, Negan turned off the tv and put out the fire in the fireplace. Moving upstairs, Negan took her toward his bedroom and it made her smile when she entered it.

“This is like it was when we were young,” she mused stepping away from Negan to look around the room. Gazing at all the posters on the wall made her chuckle because she couldn’t believe that Negan’s mother kept it the same after this long. The bookshelves were lined with trophies and she found herself in awe. Stopping, she couldn’t help but notice the few shelves that had photos lined up. Reaching for one of them, a smile spread out over her face. It was a photo of the two of them before they were even teenagers together. They were hugging each other and the young version of Negan was giving the biggest, cheesiest smile ever. “You’ve always been a ham.”

“I worked on that smile my whole life,” Negan stammered drawing her attention back to him. Standing at his dresser, Negan was shirtless starting to change for the night. Doing the same smile that he was in the photo had her laughing out. Negan could always make her laugh. That was something that she was thankful for. Setting that photo down, she reached for another that was the two of them together as teens. How she had been so stupid to things back then swirled through her mind. It made sense to her why Negan ghosted her completely when they were young. Hearing Negan going through things behind her, she set that photo down and then reached for the photo of a teenage Lucille that was on another one of the shelves. “Hey?”

“Yeah?” she swiftly set the photo down and turned on her heel to see Negan was holding out a t-shirt and some sweatpants for her. “Careful. When you give me your clothes, I tend to take them. I have a history of it.”

“If it makes you happy, I don’t care,” Negan chuckled working his slacks off and adjusting the waistband of his boxer briefs. Awe filled his body when she turned to face him and started taking off her clothes. A wolfish smile expanded over his handsome features when he took a seat on the edge of his desk. “I feel like I’m having flashbacks.”

“You still look at me like you did then,” she announced stepping out of the dress that she was wearing standing before him in just her bra and panties. Setting aside the clothes he gave her, she moved in before him and traced her fingers down over the center of his chest having him tremor beneath her touch. “Maybe this is our sign to do what we never could before.”

“Have sex in my bedroom?” Negan snickered having her head tip from side to side considering the whole thing. “No dad to come in and lecture us. Although, I don’t have any condoms again.”

“That didn’t seem to be a problem yesterday,” she noted tracing her fingers over the tattoo that covered his pectoral muscle. A shuddering breath escaped his parted lips with his long eyelashes fluttering to a close with her touching him.

“While I want to,” Negan lifted his hand, his fingers curling around her wrist. Sweeping his fingers over her pulse point, Negan shook his head. Bringing her hand up, he deposited a kiss over the center of her palm. “You’re sad. You’re hiding it. What you need isn’t sex. That’s only a temporary fix.”

“You can’t fix my sad Negan,” she pointed out having him frown at her counter statement. “I can’t expect anyone to change the pain that I’ve felt for almost two decades. You’re my angel, but no one is capable of that. You’ve already made me happier in the last day than I have felt in a long time. I can’t expect you to carry the weight of my woes on your shoulders.”

“I know, but I would be an asshole to take advantage of how you are feeling about your parents,” Negan stepped forward to caress his hands up over her sides. The roughness of his fingertips traced over her flesh and he nuzzled his nose in against hers. “Cuddle with me tonight? Then in the morning if you’re feeling frisky still, we can take a shower together and sneak one in.”

“You’re sticking to your guns, huh?” she breathed out slowly having Negan smirk and nod his head once. “Alright then.”

Stepping away from Negan, she pulled both the shirt and sweatpants on. By the time she turned back to Negan he was laying stretched out on the bed in a pair of pajama pants and an old band t-shirt. Patting beside him on the bed, Negan beckoned her to come lay with him. Moving across the room, she laid next to him and let out an amused breath looking up at the ceiling. There was an array of paintings that Negan had done up there of a space scene when he was younger that they always used to stare at.

“I’m surprised she kept it the same way,” she breathed out lowering her hand to hook her fingers with Negan’s. “I’m sure my parents threw everything out the moment they kicked me out. Yet your mother, she kept everything the same.”

“My mother is great. And that makes me feel bad sometimes. I couldn’t get the fuck away from my father fast enough,” Negan reminded her letting out a long sigh. Negan also had a complicated relationship with his father and she knew that. “I think this was her way of keeping me with her. It’s pretty sweet. Plus it’s nice to come back here to see who I used to be. Where I came from.”

“Sometimes it feels like yesterday,” she turned on her side, resting her head over the center of Negan’s chest. Cuddling her head in closer to him, she felt his arm hooking around her shoulders pulling her close. “It’d be nice to go back and take everything in. Relax.”

A loud exhale fell from Negan before he pressed a kiss against her temple, “I always thought there was a problem with me. Everyone got sick of me after a while. It scares me with Elizabeth and Peter. I worry that they will be like everyone else.”

“There is nothing wrong with you,” Negan denied with a huff, but she lifted her head to give him a tense expression. “There isn’t.”

“My parents threw me away when I was seventeen. You left. Joel got sick of me,” she listed off what she knew to be true having Negan frown. These feelings weren’t something that she just came up with. Ideas of being the problem had been flooding her mind since she was sixteen years old. “There has to be something wrong with me, right?”

“I left because…” Negan swallowed down, his Adam’s apple bouncing in this throat. “It’s complicated, but there was never anything wrong with you. If anything, you were too good. And that makes it easy for people to treat you badly. But I don’t think you have anything to worry about with your children.”

“They love their father more,” she admitted closing her eyes enjoying the way that Negan stroked his fingers through her hair.

“I did too when I was younger,” Negan reminded her, swallowing down hard thinking about his past. At the beginning of his life, Negan admired his father. A lot. His dad was the man he looked up to the most. And he was blind to how amazing his mother was. When he hit his teens, Negan had started to realize how often his father would let him down and hurt him. So he understood how she was feeling, but he knew that within time, he himself had realized his mother was the better parent all along. “It took me growing up and seeing how things were that it was my mother the whole time that was there for me. Loving me. Caring about me. I just was so desperate for his attention that I never saw that she was there the whole time for me. Sometimes it takes growing up to see who the better parent is. Now I’m not saying Joel is a bad father, but I can see how much you love your children. You like talking about them.”

“I’m sorry,” she apologized with a long sigh, but he was quick to hush her. “I know talking about them is what I do the most.”

“I like it,” Negan claimed with a snort, squeezing her in closer to him. “Your self-esteem has been shit on by the world. I think it’s time we work on that because you’re fucking amazing. And you deserve to feel that way. We’re gonna work on that together with my time here. Because I know what you’re capable of and you shouldn’t let people make you feel this way.”

Tipping her head back, she stared up at Negan and sighed. Right now she wished that was a possibility, but after everything she had been through? She wasn’t sure that was obtainable.

----

Tags: @chainsawsangel @fancypeacepersona @violent-darkness @negansbestie @elegantfanficluv

@sanctuaryforthelost @dead-of-niight @dilfsandmartinis

[kosagum]

no more naps — nanami kento · fluff · 700 words

summary: nanami worries about you. especially now, when you fall asleep on his shoulder on the train.

NANAMI worries about you, quite a bit too. nanami is a go-to-sleep-at-10-p.m., wake-up-at-7-a.m. type of man, so when he looks over to find you drifting off to sleep on his shoulder at 3 p.m., he feels perturbed. especially since you both are on the train.

how can you even sleep with all this noise? the loud roar of the train engine, the screeching of the brakes, the clacking of the wheels on the tracks, the people coming in and out, all the conversations being had, the speaker announcing the stops; you truly amaze him sometimes. he doesn’t say anything to you as he doesn’t want to disturb you, but he wonders about what your quality of sleep will be like later that night. should he wake you up now?

while nanami internally debates himself, a group of teenagers walks onto the train. they’re quite loud, talking 10 times louder due to the background noise. nanami feels irritation rise within him; their volume will definitely affect you.

he looks down at you and realizes he may have had nothing to worry about, as you now were fast asleep. his anxiety easing, nanami starts to think about your sleep schedule. as far as he knows, you sleep at the same time he does.

normally, he would have woken you up, deciding it’s better to save sleep for the end of the day and get the highest quality. but, since you guys are taking a long train ride, he’ll allow it this once.

you start to stir in your seat, which prompts nanami to pull you even closer to him while trying to stay as still as he can. he feels himself begin to blush, but decides that maximizing your sleep is most important. it’s for your health, so there’s no reason to feel nervous.

some of the teens nanami was initially worried about started to become louder. in fact, it felt like everything was becoming louder. the people entering and exiting, the people already inside, the train itself. you were bound to wake up at this rate. nanami sighs and adjusts his hold on you. he even contemplates covering your ears, but decides against it.

turning toward you, he finds himself smiling. he, again, had nothing to worry about. you were still sound asleep.

the scent of your perfume makes him begin to relax. he starts to drown out the noise, only focusing on the two of you. slowly, he begins to understand how you can become drowsy in a loud environment like this, though he will never outwardly admit it.

nanami feels his eyelids becoming heavier and heavier, the noise of everything beginning to still, his body slumping deeper into the train seat, but most importantly: his arms tightening around you.

he cannot believe he’s actually falling asleep on the train. you really have been influencing him. 

“kento. kento,” you poke his cheek.

nanami slowly opens his eyes, looking around and trying to remember where he is. once he realizes he’s on the train, another wave of anxiety ambushes him. you might have missed your stop.

“ken, it’s okay,” you giggle. “we still have around 15 minutes left. go back to sleep.” 

you give him a small peck on the cheek. nanami feels his face warming up and a smile coming on.

shaking his head, “no, i’m ok dear. i’m awake.”

“sure you are,” you tease.

you start tracing the lines on his hand with your finger, partly to remain awake, but also to try and make up for the time you spent asleep.

nanami places a kiss on your forehead and snuggles impossibly closer to you.

“still don't understand how you can sleep on the train,” he mumbles.

“i don’t understand how you don’t understand. it’s one of the best public places to sleep,” you retort.

nanami turns towards you, speechless. after stifling a small laugh, “yeah, we’re definitely going to fix your sleeping schedule. no more naps, love.”

you fake a gasp and lean toward him. “i can’t believe you’d do this to me.”

nanami lets out a real laugh this time, leaning his head on yours. “i promise it’s for the best.”

“if you say so.”

[mockerycrow]

CONGRATS ON YOUR 4K POOKIE I’M SO GLAD FOR YOU, YOU DESERVE THE WORLD 🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛

can i pretty please request roach x gn!reader with a fluff prompt “god, i’m so glad you’re alright”, after him and ghost survive “loose ends”, because they were warned in time that they cannot trust shepherd. THANK YOU AND CONGRATS AGAIN, MWAHHH

- 🐇

STILL STANDING (Roach x GN!Reader) — 4K CELEBRATION

[WARNINGS; talks about death, life affirming kisses, roach is selectively mute, fluff.]

IT WAS THE last second. It was the very last second when Roach and Ghost had heard Price’s panicked shouts through the radio, to not trust Shepherd, to go somewhere else, that they will meet again. Ghost and Roach had exchanged panicked glances the DSM in Roach’s hands when at the last second, they turned around in went deep into the woods, a completely different direction than where the chopper with Shepherd was—anything to survive that.

All Roach could think about was you and others. Ghost and Roach had cut all contact, knowing Shepherd’s men would canvas the surrounding areas for a couple of days, weeks at most; they managed to find an extremely rundown medium sized shed, one that was hidden by brush and trees. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to shelter the two from the natural elements.

Combining Ghost and Roach’s wilderness survival skills, they were able to scrounge up food when they ran out of MREs. It has to be day six when he begins to think about you again—wondering, hoping you were good they got away.

That leads him to dread another possibility; would Shepherd go after you next? Would he be found, only to be let know you’re rotting in a pool of your own blood somewhere? There’s too much that would be left unsaid between you two, not enough fucking time.

When Roach approached Ghost with his predicament, rapidly signing his thoughts—way too fast for Ghost to understand. “I— wha— alright, slow down, will ya? Can barely understand you.” Ghost says, putting his hands up as if to calm him.

Like anything could calm him; not when he had a nightmare about finding you cold and dead.

Roach takes in a slow breath as he forces his hands to slow down into more concise sentences so the other masked man can understand him. “When will we be out of here, Lieutenant?” Roach signs, watching how Ghost’s eyes track the movements of his hands and fingers. Ghost crosses his arms, his eyes flickering up to Roach’s. “I’m not too sure, I don’t think too much longer. Why?”

Roach signs your name and that’s all it takes for it to register in Ghost’s head, his eyebrows raising above the sunglasses he’s wearing. “Oh, you’re worried about them, are ya?” Ghost hums. “I’m sure they’re fine, we’ll try to contact ‘em tomorrow.” Roach let’s out a huff of relief and lazily signs thank you before he sits down on the wooden floor of the shed next to some of his gear.

Roach doesn’t sleep much that night, ranging from the fact they’re going to attempt to make contact again and the gnawing worry in his stomach; as well as the fact they’re still sleeping in shifts just in case. Roach is awoken by Ghost grabbing his shoulder and shaking him awake, his voice urging for him to wake up. Roach groggily sits up whilst Ghost stupidly tries to tell him what he has to say right off the bat, causing Roach to just stare at him with exhausted eyes.

Ghost lets out a sigh. “Roach.” He utters, waiting for Roach to give him a sign he is processing things. Roach takes a second before nodding, running his fingers through his hair. His helmet and goggles are by his side which Roach grabs before adjusting the tan mask on his face. “I made contact, they’re fine.” Ghost murmurs, making Roach light up, his eyebrows raising. He begins to rapidly sign, making Ghost chuckle. “Calm down, will ya? We’re meeting them 2 klicks north from here, so we can regroup.”

Roach wastes no time, quickly putting on his helmet and goggles, clicking the strap. He adjusts the goggles and the man stands up so quickly, he’s dizzy. “Woah there—“ Ghost grabs his shoulder to steady the man, but Roach quickly begins to gather his things, reorganizing what’s needed in his bag. The excitement and nervousness beneath his skin threatened to burst with every moment, his fingers trembling. Roach knows he needs to feel you under his fingers to properly process you’re genuinely okay.

Ghost packs his stuff as well, and they work together to make it look like no one was in the shed in the first place. They leave the shed with their guns in hand, slowly making their way through the thick forest towards the location. Roach is deep in thought as they begin their journey; are you as relieved as he is? He hopes so, but on the other hand, he doesn’t want you to be so worried over him. Roach keeps reminding himself to sign slowly for you, because he knows the second he sees you, he won’t be able to properly sign. 

His heart is pounding in his chest as Ghost utters that they’re close, that they should be able to spot a vehicle soon. A few more minutes of walking and they hear shuffling of leaves. Roach quickly turns and aims his rifle—it’s you. He nearly drops his rifle, a smile widening under his mask. You’re running towards him which does actually prompt him to drop his rifle—his bootcamp instructors are screaming at him in his head—but he starts running towards you as well. You run right into him, nearly toppling him over with your hug, your arms wrapping tightly around him. Roach’s hands scramble to grab onto your gear, stumbling around as you sniffle, holding onto him.

Roach lets out a shuddery breath, relief rolling off of him in waves. His tense shoulders relax once he finally has you in his arms. You pull your head away enough to look at him in the eyes, tears in your own. “God, I’m so glad you’re alright.” Your voice cracks as you express your relief. Roach’s breath hitches in his throat and he lets go of you, shakily ripping his helmet off, dropping it in the sticks and leaves to the side. He raises his goggles to sit on his forehead and he rips his mask down before he cups your cheeks and presses a desperate kiss against your lips which you return. You both know you’ll equally be embarrassed about this, kissing so needily in front of the others, but it’s needed—you both needed it.

[thebestofoneshots]

Gilded Constellations | wolfstar x reader

Series Masterlist | Previous episode

Pairing: Wolfstar x Reader Word Count: 6.2 K Warnings: None Prompt: It's all about planning. This IS a wolfstar x reader fic, but it's incredibly slow burn. They won't start all dating each other until we're very deep into the story, but I promise the long wait will be worth it.

Chapter 18: Friends will be friends

Somehow, the pranks you'd pulled with Remus had ended up all over the school, hidden by students in the most inconspicuous places so that distracted and unsuspecting kids would stumble upon them and get a good jumpscare. Steven SkeIIignton, as he’d gotten baptised by Marlene who’d gotten a hellscare later on the Halloween party, was still in the closet, and had already gotten at least 20 kids to jump out of their skin in the past week.. .

As a matter of fact, it was often the gophers who would nonchalantly ask their friends to retrieve an item from the wardrobe or hand them a sweater they claimed to have left inside, all in the hopes of giving them a good stratle. And the cycle would just repeat itself. At some point, people even started being wary when asked for small favours like that. It was hilarious. 

Meanwhile, James was determined on making his date with Lily absolutely perfect. He did not want to rush it, and so he had you, Sirius, Remus and Peter wake up even earlier so that you’d talk about possible plans. It must have been like 4:30 in the morning when you heard a knock on your door the first time. You hadn’t been sleeping well at all, so you rushed to see who the hell would be knocking on the door only to find James’ head poking out from the invisibility cloak.

“Hurry, you’ve gotta come with me,” he whispered. 

“I’m in pyjamas?” You argued, and you really had only a pair of shorts and a light shirt, your covers had a warming spell, so you didn’t need much warm clothes, even with how chill the November night had already gotten in Scotland. 

“Doesn't matter, I’ll tell Sirius to lend you something if you get too cold. Now come, it’s urgent!”

You rolled your eyes, picking your wand up and did what James asked since it sounded important. Once you stepped outside he quickly wrapped the cloak around the two of you, holding it carefully above your head, you were huddled beside him as he guided you up a couple of stairs. Since you were still a bit sleepy, you didn’t quite register he was taking you back to their room until you saw their door “James, an emergency?!? What happened?” you asked genuinely worried now. 

“I’ll tell you once we’re in the room, we don’t want anyone to see us,” he said as he opened the door and brought the two of you inside. He took off the cloak and you took a couple of steps from him, without James’ body heat irradiating onto you, the sudden drop in temperature made you wince. 

“Do you not have a heater in this room?” you complained. 

He just shrugged and then clapped his hands loudly “All right boys, wakey, wakey!” he shouted, before using his wand to turn on several lights around the room, you squinted as he did since your eyes were not used to so much brightness. 

Peter was the first one to startle awake, looking at you and James very confused, “(Y/N)?” 

“Get your own girlfriend and stop dreaming about mine Wormtail!” Sirius, who had the covers on top of his head to avoid the light, said irritated.

“I wasn’t-“ The boy started. 

“–She’s here,” Remus said, sitting up on his bed, and rubbing his eyes. He was wearing a soft brown plaid pyjama shirt, and didn’t have all his buttons done, he kinda looked like the softer version of his sexy pirate outfit from the party. But like, really soft and cuddly. 

“Who’s here?” He asked, finally kicking the covers off his head, and hollymotherofmerlin, that’s what he looks like just waking up? You wondered as you tried not to shamelessly stare at the way his hair was beautifully sprawled on the bed. “Stashine? What are you doing here?” 

You turned to James, “Yeah Prongs, what am I doing here?” You asked, arms crossed over your chest, mostly because of the cold. 

“I need your help.” 

“For what?” Asked Peter with a frown. You shot him an annoyed look. “Didn’t mean it like that…” he added. You were all too sleepy for decency. 

James went and sat on top of the rug in between the beds, and motioned for you to sit next to him. “Come on, I didn’t wake her for you to stay in bed all day, hurry up!” he urged the rest. Peter stood from his bed, he wore a long sleeve white tee and a pair of red plaid pants, and he sat right in front of the two of you. Remus stood up and sat next to James, almost across from you. He had matching pants and a pair of fuzzy socks on. Sirius unsurprisingly was the last one, he lazily brushed his hair with his fingers before he stood up, he had a black queen shirt and his pants had electric guitars stamped all over them. You wonder where he’d gotten those muggle clothes when James spoke again, “Ok kids, we need to plan this together.” 

“A prank?” Remus asked. 

“You’re bringing her in?” Asked a leery Peter.

“She’d be of great help actually,” chimed Remus, a little defensively. 

“She really would! Didn’t I tell you about the libra-“ he started. 

“-It’s not a prank you wankers!” James said, interrupting the little fight Sirius and Peter might just start “All though I do think you’d be useful in a prank,” he said turning to you and thinking of the Magical Theory project you’d been working on. 

“Jee, Thanks Prongs!” you responded, almost sarcastically, “but if it’s not a prank, then… What's the emergency?”

“There is no emergency, I said it was urgent.”

“James, mate, you either tell us what the hell is going on in your head or I’ll go back to bed,” Sirius threatened “It’s like 5 am.”

“4:30 actually,” you corrected him. 

“4:30!? PROOONGS!” Peter whined. 

“It’s about Lily!” 

“You brought me here for Lily?” You asked with a frown. 

“You woke us up because of your crush?!” Remus complained, he was about to snap at James and go back to his bed. As much as he loved his friend, he needed his sleep. He did not want to be snappy all day because of a lack of it. 

“It’ll be just a moment, then you can go back to sleep.”

“I thought you were flying today,” Remus said and turned to you, you had your arms wrapped around your legs, and you were rubbing them every now and then, “You cold luv?” He asked. You nodded.

“I meant you and Peter,” he responded “These two will come flying earlier today anyway, the game’s just around the corner, I have to make sure they’re in top shape.” 

Remus extended his hand and pulled a sweater from the chest at the end of his bed, before throwing it at you. “Thanks Rem,” you said, pulling the sweater over your head, it was so big you could even cover your legs with it, which you did. And fuck, she looks adorable, Remus thought before mentally slapping himself for it. 

Sirius then used his wand to levitate his cover above your head, letting it gently fall over your head, “It’s pretty cold in here, right Starshine?” he asked softly. Sirius could sometimes be so gentle it startled you, but you nodded, turning a little red as you wrapped yourself around the covers. Remus’ sweater wasn’t too warm, but it was soft, and it smelled like chocolate and old books, exactly like the boy, which you had always considered a very pleasant smell, nice, it’s nice, your mind whispered. Meanwhile, Sirius’ cover was still warm since it was the one he had been using earlier, it did not feel like it had any charms on it, which meant it was all just Sirius’ body heat, you wondered how nice it’d be to sleep beside him as you snuggled yourself deeper into the clothes they had borrowed you, relishing on the soft combination of scents. 

“Can we focus?” James pressed. 

“You haven’t told us why we’re here, James,” You reminded him. 

“It’s about the date,” you nodded, prompting him to continue, but it was a little hard to take you seriously wrapped in so many covers like that. “I want it to be the best date of her life.” 

“Take her to Hogsmeade,” Peter proposed. 

“Take her flying,” Sirius offered, “it always works with girls.” 

You threw him a surprised look “Does it?” 

“Worked with you, didn’t it?” He told you with the sweetest little face he could pull off. 

“You’re such an idiot,” you said as you went for a playful hit on his shoulder, but he stopped your hand and pulled it to his lips instead, kissing it softly.  

“Maybe, but you love me anyway,” he responded cockily, leaning his cheek on your hand. 

“How about a date in the Room of Requirements?” Remus said loudly, trying not to sound bitter as he interrupted the two of you. 

You were still staring into Sirius’s eyes when he spoke but turned to Remus when what he said piqued your interest “The what?” 

“The Room of Requirements. It’s this room that sometimes shows up, only when you really need it, and it basically becomes whatever you need it to be. I stumbled into it when I was looking for my homework once, and it was this massive lost objects storage room,” he explained.

“But then he went with me and it turned into a room with a huge cauldron on the inside, basically enough space for us to brew the potion we wanted to brew for a prank. That’s how we discovered it was magical,” James explained.

“That sounds incredible! But… What if it turns into something that scares Lily away?” 

“Like what?” James asked, confused. 

“Well… I don’t know what you require Prongs, but if by bad luck you think the wrong thing and a freaking bedroom shows up, Lily will probably never talk to you again.” 

All the boys laughed at that, even Peter, who seemed to be a lot more at ease now “She just called you horny mate,” he told him in between chuckles. 

James had just gone red, which caused everyone to laugh even more “That rules out the Room of Requirements,” Remus said with a playful smile. 

“But we should go, tho, seems like a cool place.” 

“Not scared of what may show up, Starshine?” Sirius teased, leaning onto you.  

“Why? Are you?” you teased back. 

James cleared his throat, “Any other ideas?” he asked, looking straight at you “Where would you take Lily on a date?” 

You thought about it for a second, “To a picnic by the lake,” you said simply “I’ve seen Lily sketch a few things on a little notebook that she carries around with her all the time.” 

“It’s her journal,” James clarified. 

“How do you…?” 

“He tried to steal it once,” Remus said casually. 

“Dude, that’s awful.” 

“I was 13! I genuinely thought it’d be a great idea,” he clarified “Besides it was Sirius’ idea.” 

“I said it as a JOKE!” The other said, it seemed like a small little quarrel was about to start regarding that particular incident, which just made you look at the two of them, diverted. 

“The journal…” Remus said to you, asking you to finish your earlier thought. 

“Right, so, she likes drawing,” James stopped staring at Sirius and turned his attention back at you “I’d get some art supplies or something, and take her to a nice place by the lake so we could draw something together, take some of her favourite treats from the kitchens, and maybe some soft music too, she likes ABBA a lot. Then I’d go for a walk with her, while our paintings dry, and just be super nice and listen to her talk. She knows so much, it’s always fun to hear whatever she has to say, so it’d be fun for the two of us.” 

“You’re lucky she’s not your love rival Prongs, she’d definitely sway me with a date like that,” Remus teased, as if you needed to take him on a date to sway him. 

“You draw?” you asked him, he shook his head “Sirius does tho.” 

You turned to your boyfriend, amazed “I’ve never seen you draw.” 

“He only draws when he’s alone, I discovered by accident,” Remus answered instead.

“You should show me one day,” you told Sirius with a soft smile.

“Good luck with that,” Remus responded, “he almost beat me once for taking his sketchbook from his hands.” 

“Wait, really?” You asked the taller boy.

“If we’re done with date planning, can I go back to bed?” Peter asked. 

James took a look at his watch, and nodded “Sure, we’ll meet tomorrow at the same time for the details,” he said. 

“Prongs, 4:30? Two days in a row? for real?!” Remus asked, a little annoyed. 

“Yeah, we could just do it after classes or something.” You offered. 

“Yeah, as if sneaking you into our room in the middle of the night wasn’t hard enough,” James answered.

“I could just… walk in?” you said with a little frown.

“Nope, too suspicious, Lily will notice, she’s clever like that.” 

“I could just tell her you’re helping me get some quality time with my boyfriend.” You said, pointing at Sirius “You literally sleep in the same room, no one will think anything of it.” 

“Except that you’re shagging Sirius,” Peter said casually. 

“It’s her boyfriend though, and they won’t shag with the rest of us here,” Remus said logically.

“Who knows?” Peter said with a shrug “Maybe they’re into that kind of stuff, wouldn’t be the first poly wizards in the history of the world.”

“Poly what-?!” You asked confused.  

“-Shut up guys! That’s… It’s not entirely a bad idea…” 

“Poly isn’t a bad idea?” Peter asked, just to fuck with James.

“What? No, not that Wormtail, shut up! The other thing…” He turned to you, “We bring you here with the excuse that you’re gonna see Sirius, and then we plan the date,” James said. 

“You don’t mind that luv?” Remus asked with a little frown, always so considerate. 

“‘Course she doesn’t, we’re dating,” Sirius said matter-of-factly as he placed his arm over your shoulders and brought you closer to him.

“Sirius.” Remus said sternly “She’s a girl, it’s not the same for them, there’s double standards.” 

“Why don’t we meet in the Room of Requirements instead?” you suggested, “No one finds out, no one thinks we’re shagging or whatever, and no one suspects we’re planning James’ date either?”

“Gosh, you’re so clever, aren’t you Starshine?” Sirius said as he brought you closer and placed a kiss on your head, or at least over the covers you had around it. 

“Sounds good enough for me,” James said with a smile. 

“Fantastic, I’m going back to bed,” Remus said as he stood up and walked straight into his bed, gently laying down and covering his face with a pillow. Peter followed suit, although he just threw himself on the bed head down. Sirius only laid his head on top of yours, since you had yours on his shoulder already. 

“We’re going flying now, aren’t we?” He asked with a sigh. 

“We are indeed,” James said animatedly, a smile playing on his face, he was the biggest morning person you’d ever met, you definitely couldn’t relate, even if you loved flying as much as he did, mornings were just tough on you. From what you were looking at, Sirius was the same, in fact, James was the odd one out of the entire room. 

“I should go change,” You said, as you motioned to get up. 

“You can’t!” James said, moving his hands in the air, panicked, “Lily will ask why you weren’t in the room, she might be awake by now.” 

He wasn’t wrong, Lily might be awake by now, she sometimes woke up earlier to add final touches to her homework or do some of the readings you were left by teachers “But I can’t go flying with shorts and a shirt, I’ll freeze!” 

“Keep my sweater,” Remus mumbled, still from under his pillow. 

“Problem solved,” James said with a smile. 

“The shorts, James.” 

“You could just stay and cuddle with me,” Sirius offered with a shrug “James can go flying by himself. Promise my bed is warm and we could–” 

“–No way! Quidditch match is in a week, you can’t skip flying now!” 

Sirius took a deep breath and groaned, patting you lightly on the back so you’d stop leaning on him as he moved to his own chest, rummaging through it and picking up a pair of pants that didn’t fit anymore “You think this would fit?” he asked. 

You raised your eyebrows, and then tilt your head lightly, analysing the situation “It just might,” You said taking it from his hands and putting it against your body. 

“Sweet, go change then,” James said as he pretty much pushed you into the bathroom, he was damn lucky you’d put on a pair of trainers when he asked you to come without a warning of his plan. 

You sighed once you were inside their bathroom. You couldn’t help but look around a little as you put on Sirius’ pants. Their bathroom was almost a mirror to yours, it had a small cupboard next to the sink with a lot of potions, aftershave and even some Sleekeasy’s, you wondered who was the one that used it, since clearly, it wasn’t Potter, even if his dad had invented it. Probably Peter, you thought, he always has a rather put-together look going on.  When you were done you realised the pants fit well enough, all thought they were a little loose on the waist. You put your trainers back on and threw some water at your face and hair, to get it to somehow look decent, it’d gotten even messier since you’d placed Sirius soft covers over it. 

When you walked out of the Bathroom James was sitting on his bed while putting on a pair of shoes while Sirius was putting on his thick quidditch sweater. “Got a hair tie?” You asked him. 

He turned to you and nodded “Come,” he said softly as he patted his bed. You did as he rummaged through his side table “Want me to tie it for you?” 

You almost gave him a questioning look but shrugged in the end, turning around so he could do his thing. He was soft, a lot softer than you remember him being in the Great Hall a couple of months back, but you weren’t moving as much this time either. And he also had a brush this time, he gently brushed your strands a couple of times before he started to softly pull your hair back. You visibly relaxed as he was running his fingers through your scalp, allowing him to make your ponytail however he wanted. When he was done he leaned closer and pressed a cheeky kiss on your neck. 

“Done luv,” he said as he buried his head deeper into your neck, enjoying the way you smelled today. 

“Great, let’s go!” James said, completely oblivious to how much Sirius was enjoying himself. The boy gave him an annoyed look as he separated from your neck, but James wasn’t even phased. He was used to Sirius’ temperament, and he also knew he loved flying with you in the mornings. 

The three of you walked down to the courtyard and James started giving you exercises to warm up. After that, he gave you a couple of instructions and had you speed back and forth from tower to tower. He was flying beside you as you sped through the buildings and avoided the obstacles that came on the way. 

He also had you practise resistance, “The match might be long, we need you to pay attention to everything that’s going on and not to lose concentration because of tiredness.” he told you, he had you hold yourself in the air by grabbing onto the broom with your hands and also practise the same trick you’d done on the trials, over and over again, until your arms were trembling. All the while he had Sirius beat the quaffle back and forth, with the help of a spell that had it bounce back at his face every time he shot it away. 

“Prooongs, I’m tired,” He complained, as he flew to the side so the quaffle wouldn’t hit his face “Aren’t you Starshine?” 

“Yeah,” you sighed as you let yourself fall on your broom, allowing your head to rest on the handle as you laid flat on it “And we should probably,” you yawned “start going back, we have class in 30 minutes, I still have to put my uniform on.” 

“Watch out!” You heard James scream as Sirius’ bludger rapidly sped towards you, you raised back into a sitting position and flew downwards as you grabbed onto the ball with both hands, trying to slowly reduce its speed. 

“The chest.” You struggled to say as the quaffle fought its way out of your grasp, Sirius flew straight down and opened the place where you kept all of the quidditch stuff, you flew right after him and forced the bludger into its spot while the grey-eyed boy wrapped the protection chains over it. Once the bludger was secure, you let yourself fall on the ground, exhausted. 

James rushed down when he realised the commotion his little practice had caused, it was far away from the worst thing that had happened on morning flights, especially since you had joined them; you and Sirius would constantly do stupid shit that could get you three kiIled, especially because James had somewhat of a lack of self-control, and all that Gryffindor bravado mixed with the endorphins of flying, almost always had him joining your little shenanigans “You ok?” he asked “please tell me you’re not hurt anywhere,” he said as he reached closer to you and started inspecting your hands “we can’t have out star keeper injured just before the ga–“

“–James!” you reprimanded. “Quidditch?! Really?” 

“You know I didn’t mean it like that!” he told you, a small regretful frown on his face. 

You scoffed playfully, “I sometimes forget James’ priorities consist of Lily Evans and Quidditch, exclusively,” you joked, though you knew it was a lie, technically James’ priorities consisted of: his friends, getting Lily Evans to like him back and Quidditch, in that order. Unless a quidditch game was around the corner in which case, number three became priority #1. 

“‘M sorry luv. Are you ok? Not because of quidditch this time.” 

You laughed but nodded “Yeah, ‘m good. I just… want to lay here for a bit.”  

Sirius threw himself next to you, “We’ve got class.” 

“I know,” you answered, “I’m just… really freaking tired today, didn’t sleep well either.” 

“‘Cause of Prongs?” he asked, and you felt him reach for your hand, tracing small patterns with his finger over your palm.

You shook your head,  “Not that… I’ve got those nightmares again.” 

He turned to you, a sympathetic look on his face “I wouldn’t let anything happen to you, you know that, right?” You nodded, not sure how much Sirius would be able to do against your nightmare. But leaned in to give him a soft kiss on the cheek, but he was faster, and he moved to give you a kiss on the lips “Been wanting to do that since I saw you standing in my room,” he said “That and other things.” 

“Ugh, get a room! I swear, We were better off before you two started dating,” James complained as he started gathering up his things. 

“Shut it Prongs, you’re just jealous,” Sirius said before giving you another kiss. 

“20 minutes to get to class.” James reminded you then. Sirius groaned, but finally stood up, extending a hand to pull you as well. You took it gladly and stood next to them, as you levitated the chest towards the storage room under the bleachers. 

“How about I go change and bring your cloaks while you gather some food for me? We can meet just outside the great hall?” 

“That’s a brilliant idea!” James told you as he pulled a pair of keys outside of his pocket, and threw them at you, you caught them with ease “Mine is hanged next to my bed.” 

“Mine’s on my dresser,” Sirius added. 

“Sweet, I’ll hurry up and meet you in a bit, deal?” You said, before taking off. 

“What about my goodbye kiss, Starshine?” Sirius shouted. 

“I’ll give you a hello kiss when we see each other again instead Puppy,” you said casually, throwing a wink his way. 

Once you arrived at your bedroom, you realised everyone was gone. Which made sense, the girls should have gone down for breakfast several minutes ago, it was you who was lagging behind. You quickly took off the clothes the boys had given you and put your uniform on, taking Remus’ sweater along with you when you walked towards the boys’ room. You used James’ key to open the door and went straight to James’ bed, taking his cloak in a swift motion before realising Remus was still in his bed. 

He was soundly asleep, his chest rising and falling slowly, looking ever so peaceful. You stared at him for a minute, not realising you were staring until he frowned and moved a little in his sleep. Peter had clearly left a while ago, his bed a total mess, since he had rushed down to get a good fill of breakfast. You approached the boy “Hey Rem!” you whispered, as not to startle him, but he didn’t budge, which prompted you to move closer to him and gently place your hand over his shoulder, shaking it just slightly “Remus, class is about to start.” 

Remus, still half asleep, and thinking you were Sirius, grabbed your arm and threw you onto the bed next to him, placing his forearm over your chest to hold you down in a move that you could only describe as a martial arts movement you’d seen in comics at some point.

You gasped, it all happened too fast “Ooofff... if you didn’t want to wake up, you could’ve just told me…” you joked as you stared right into his eyes, he was hovering over you, pressing you into the bed a little harder than what would be comfortable. 

“Dollface?” He asked confused, quickly getting off you “I’m sorry, I thought you were Sirius.”

Dollface? That’s a new nickname, you thought. “Do you normally push Sirius onto your bed like that?” you asked with eyebrows raised as you sat back on the bed to look at him better. 

“It’s an inside joke,” Remus explained “Sirius did it to me once when I tried to wake him up.” He yawned, “Why are you here again?” He asked, a little confused. 

“Came to get the boys’ robes,” You said, lifting yourself over him, who was sitting on the other side, to try and find James’ uniform that you’d grabbed previously. Remus held his breath as your hand crossed over his lap casually. Can she hear my heart racing? he wondered. The robe was now pooling on the floor, no longer neatly ironed as it had been, you winced when you noticed the state it was on, and let yourself fall back on Remus’ bed as if it were your own with a sigh “James went a little savage with training today,” you complained “I feel like my arms will fall off.” 

Were you being a little dramatic? Probably, still, Remus felt like the only person you could complain to, you didn’t want to appear weak to anybody, let alone James who was way too preoccupied with the game, but with Remus it was different, you genuinely felt like he wouldn’t judge you for being tired, or for not managing to quite keep up with the other boys’ stamina. 

“I might have something that could help,” He told you looking through his drawers. 

You shook your head quickly, “Nu-uh, last time I took some of your medicine Remus, I ended up so freaking high I kept blabbering about how pretty Lily’s hair was, how nice your hands are, and how thirsty I was for Sirius.” 

“You… like my hands?” He asked with a frown, taking a look at them, especially at the scars on them.  

“And that wasn’t the only thing I said either,” you responded with a sigh, finally standing up, “We should probably go,” You told him, as you grabbed his sweater from the spot you’d left it next to your bag “Where do you put your dirty clothes?”

“What for?” He asked, turning around “Oh, that?” He approached you and took it in his hands before giving it a whiff “It’s not dirty,” he said before plopping it over his head. 

“Didn’t I sweat it?” You asked with a little frown.

“Nah, it smells fine,” he said casually as he walked over to the bathroom, that was a lie, it didn’t just smell fine, it smelled bIoody delightful. He gave it another whiff as he sat on the edge of the tub and then quickly remembered what he was doing. Cursing himself for it and banging the wall, causing a potion bottle to fall on the ground and break into hundreds of tiny little pieces. 

“You all right?” he heard you asking from the other side of the door. 

“Yeah, fine, fine.” He said as he pulled his wand out and whispered “reparo.” 

When he was out of the bathroom, Remus already had his school pants on, he didn’t bother to change his pyjamas nor his sweater before he plopped his robe on top. 

“You found Sirius’ robes?” he asked as he approached you, you were rummaging through some of the drawers next to Sirius’ bed. 

“He said on the dresser, but he didn’t say where on the dresser,” you complained. 

“Bottom left drawer,” Remus replied simply, he was over at his desk, gathering some books and placing them on his bag.

You leaned down to get it and finally found the robe, pulling it out just to have a small sketchbook drop from it. You opened your eyes wide as you picked it up, looking back at Remus “Is this the–“ 

“–Yeah,” he said. 

“You never got to see it, did you?” He shook his head in response. You looked at the small notebook, so tempting. Not only for you, in fact, it was just as tempting for the two. “Imma… Imma put it back…” 

“Yeah, great idea,” he said and helped you close the drawer after you put the notebook back in the dresser. 

“We’re super late.” He told you. 

“Let’s run!” You said with a smile as you approached the door. 

“Weren’t you knackered?” 

You shrugged “We need to get to class anyway,” you said, nodding your head with a smile, Remus thought it was the most tempting smile he’d ever seen in his life. 

“Fine then, let’s run.” 

The two of you started running right after, down the stairs, through the common room, out of the portrait and towards the other set of stairs. You slid down some of the stairs’ handles and then continued running. Remus was keeping up with you easily, and he was having lots of fun. He was actually admiring the way your hair flowed behind you when you turned to him “Come on, we gotta hurry!” you said with another one of those diverted smiles that made him want to kiIl himself for liking you so much. When the two of you finally arrived outside of the great hall, Sirius, James and Peter were already there. 

“Told you they’d come together,” Peter told Sirius “You woke Moony up, didn’t you?” he asked. 

“Yeah,” you said, leaning down and using your own knees for support as you regained your breath “he sleeps like a log,” you added. 

“I wouldn’t say that…” Remus said, also panting a little. 

“You ran all the way here?” James asked. You only nodded. “That’s great for strengthening your legs,” he said with a small approving nod. You threw his robe at him “Oi! Careful luv.” 

“Stop pestering her about quidditch you plonker,” Remus said, finally standing straight, and handing Sirius his robe, their fingers brushed lightly as he did and he almost flushed. Fucking hell, this needs to stop. He made a mental note to call Alice later, she was really good at helping him forget, or at least distract enough to calm the urges down a little.

“Well then, let’s get going,” Sirius said as he handed you a sandwich wrapped in a napkin. 

“You didn’t get anything for Rem?” you asked as you walked alongside them toward the classroom. 

“Wormy didn’t tell us you hadn’t eaten until we were outside,” James said apologetically. 

“No problem, we can share,” you said, giving it a bite and handing it over to the boy so he could do the same, he seemed rather hesitant “Unless you think sharing food is gross… We could cut it or–“ 

“No, it’s fine.” He said as he took the sandwich from your hands. 

“It’s not like you’ve never exchanged saliva anyway,” Peter shrugged casually. 

That had Remus choking on his bite and coughing a couple of times, you took an empty water bottle from your bag and whispered “aguamenti,” before handing it over to him. You then placed your hand over his to drag it closer to your mouth and give the sandwich another bite. Remus had gotten so red at that point you started to worry, maybe he was actually choking on something, he wasn’t. “Remus are you–“ 

“I’m fine, just, I choked for a second,” he lied. In truth, he’d actually gotten flashbacks to the time you’d both kissed when you randomly grabbed onto his hand and thank Merlin it seemed like he was choking because if he hadn’t he was sure Sirius would punch him in the face for it, and maybe he actually deserved it. 

You all got to class a little late that day, Professor Bins had you practise a couple of cleaning spells as a punishment. But the five of you executed them so impeccably, that he ended up giving you house points for it. 

Later on that day, you were sitting alongside the girls in the Great Hall during lunch when you heard the owls started to arrive. A few minutes later, a package wrapped in brown kraft paper dropped down right in front of you.

“Is it? it?” Marlene asked.  

“I think so,” you nodded, ripping the paper open, only to find your quidditch sweater, along with the rest of the uniforms, you smiled widely when you saw it proudly put it on “It’s stunning.” 

Marlene nodded in agreement, she still remembered the day she got her first Quidditch uniform delivered. Sirius was walking towards the table and as you were adjusting the sweater and whistled. You dеadpanned at him as he approached you with a cheeky grin, biting his own lip to avoid making it bigger “It suits you.” 

“Thanks Puppy!” you replied, smiling as well. He sat beside you, unnecessarily close, not that either of you minded.

“All of your gear is here?” He asked as he looked through the rest of the items in the bag. 

“All the new stuff at least,” you responded. The rest is already in my room, especially the protective stuff; James gave me some from when he was smaller, they’re still in great condition.

“Oh, you’ll take my goggles then.”

“I’ve got some of my own.” 

“I’m aware,” he said. “But if you’re wearing James’ clothes, then you should also wear something of mine.” 

“Why?” 

“Because.” You frowned at his answer. 

“For luck,” Peter intervened. “You know what they say, something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue.” 

“You can’t wear something blue on a match against Ravenclaw,” Tom intervened, even if he wasn’t a player, he was very passionate about Quidditch, mostly because he was friends with a bunch of players. 

“Isn’t that for weddings?” Beth intervened as she placed a piece of bread in her mouth. 

“No, I’m pretty sure it’s for luck,” Peter repeated. 

“It is for weddings,” Lily said then, “It’s a muggle thing. Besides, if she’s wearing some of the old stuff from James, she wouldn’t need anything else. That would be enough for the borrowed thing.” 

“Oh, I know! You could wear blue undies!” Tom said suddenly, you threw him a warning look “What?” he said, “Ye lads ’re looking for problems, I’m getting solutions.” 

“I’ve got this really old hair broach you could wear.” Beth offered. 

“So that’s… Something old from Beth, something borrowed from James, something blue: Tom’s idea for the underwear, and something new,” Marlene said, pointing at the bag filled with new equipment as she said the last bit. 

“Brilliant, now she can get married,” said Mary ironically, “Will you really do such a ridiculous thing for luck?” She said, turning to you.

“I, for once, think she’ll look great in blue undies,” said Tom with a shrug. That earned him a kick on the shin from Sirius, “Auch!” he complained “I was just saying.” 

“You’ll still wear my goggles right?” He asked, throwing you his puppy eye look.

You sighed but nodded “Sure thing Puppy, I’ll wear your goggles.”

Series Masterlist | Next Chapter

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A/N: I had the absolute worst time trying to post this episode and I kid you not I almost cried out of distress. But it's finally working! Thanks to many tests and also to our lord savior ChatGPT who helped me find the pesky/problematic words. Hope you enjoyed the cute Remus moments, much love!

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