#we’re not in 2013 anymore and he’s not a teenager

[releaseholiday]

.

[goodnightmemes]

EVIL DEAD (2013) SENTENCE STARTERS

trigger warning for violence, foul language, and horror. feel free to change pronouns / terms / tense as needed!

❛ Only the evil book can undo what the evil book has done. ❜

❛ Please. I just want to go home. ❜

❛ [name]'s dead. You know that. You killed her. ❜

❛ No, why are you saying these things? ❜

❛ I'll rip your soul out, you pathetic fuck! ❜

❛ I will kill you like I killed your whore! ❜

❛ You were supposed to be here two hours ago. ❜

❛ I'll be damned. You actually came. ❜

❛ I know I look like road kill. ❜

❛ You're a charming liar, as always. ❜

❛ We always loved this place, didn't we? ❜

❛ I thought you didn't believe in that kind of stuff. ❜

❛ Promise me you'll stay with me until the end. ❜

❛ Looks like someone broke in. ❜

❛ Some teenagers probably just broke in here to drink beer and bump uglies. ❜

❛ Let's make this place livable. ❜

❛ I don't think you need sad memories in your head right now. ❜

❛ I wanted to be there. Okay? I did. ❜

❛ This time the only way is the hard way. ❜

❛ Look, we all need to be together on this. Otherwise it won't work. ❜

❛ I came here to make things better with my sister, not worse. ❜

❛ I can't stand that fucking smell anymore. ❜

❛ Withdrawal's kicking in hard. ❜

❛ Oh, is that blood? ❜

❛ Careful. These steps are old and rotten. ❜

❛ What the fuck happened here? ❜

❛ No, no, no. Voodoo is more about dolls and personal artifacts. This is something different. ❜

❛ You shouldn't have touched anything from that basement. ❜

❛ I'm going insane here. I feel like I'm losing my mind. ❜

❛ We can't lose you again. ❜

❛ Oh, my God. I'm such an idiot. To think for once in my life, I could count on you. ❜

❛ She's talking about a woman in the woods. How the forest attacked her. ❜

❛ Well, don't you think we should take her to a hospital? ❜

❛ I feel like we're in over our heads here. ❜

❛ If we leave now, all of this mess will have been for nothing. ❜

❛ Please. You have to get me out of here. ❜

❛ There was something in the woods. And I think it's in here with us now. ❜

❛ Look, you know it's all in your head. Just try to get it together. ❜

❛ Please, would you just get rid of that thing? ❜

❛ Open the fucking door! ❜

❛ Well, nobody could have known she would do something so twisted! ❜

❛ No, you should have known! We've all been following your lead since we got here. ❜

❛ We should have left when [name] wanted to. ❜

❛ Everything's gonna be fine. ❜

❛ I don't know if you've noticed this, but nothing has been fine. And everything's been getting worse every second. ❜

❛ Put the gun down, please. Put the fucking gun down! ❜

❛ One by one, we will take you! ❜

❛ You are all going to die tonight. ❜

❛ This is impossible. I just gave her enough sedative to put a horse to sleep. ❜

❛ I gotta get the shrapnel out of my arm. ❜

❛ I don't think a tranquilizer's gonna do shit. 'Cause I don't think we're dealing with a freaking panic attack here! ❜

❛ I'm scared that what's happening to [name] has something to do with the fucking witchcraft in the basement! ❜

❛ Oh, my God! Why the fuck did you do that? ❜

❛ I did something terrible. ❜

❛ That thing I killed was not [name]. ❜

❛ I read a passage from that book. It was... It was some sort of prayer. I released something. I released something evil. ❜

❛ Why did you lock me down here? ❜

❛ You got violent and we didn't know what else to do. ❜

❛ Look, something really terrible has happened and we have to get out of here now. Okay? ❜

❛ He's not gonna let you leave! And he's not gonna stop till he has you. Until he has all of you! ❜

❛ I can smell your filthy soul. ❜

❛ [name]'s not here, you fucking idiot! ❜

❛ I don't know why, but I thought this would end it. ❜

❛ There's some translations, but...just scattered notes. They all refer to some... evil entity. A taker of souls. A demon. ❜

❛ This thing is attached to [name]'s soul like a leech. It's becoming her. ❜

❛ If we want to stop this, if we want to help [name]...I think we're gonna have to kill her. ❜

❛ We're not gonna fucking kill anybody! Are you listening to yourself? ❜

❛ It doesn't matter where we go. If we don't do something right now, we're all gonna be dead by then! ❜

❛ We're gonna get you ❜

❛ I had to do it. And I feel much better now. ❜

❛ These inscriptions are confusing, sometimes contradictory, but they're consistent about one thing. In order to stop this, the possessed must be cleansed. Purified. ❜

❛ Am I sure? Of course not. This is not a science book! ❜

❛ If she dies, then this thing is gonna die with her. ❜

❛ You're just a fucking coward. You know exactly what we have to do, but you're too scared to go through with it. ❜

❛ I'm gonna burn this fucking place down. And I'm gonna end this nightmare. ❜

❛ Why don't you just run away? Go hide beneath some rock somewhere. You know you're great at that. ❜

❛ Why are you hurting me? ❜

❛ Don't die on me, please! ❜

❛ Dying wouldn't be so bad right now. I just don't want to become the devil's bitch. ❜

❛ I'm gonna do what I gotta do. Okay? ❜

❛ Why do you hate me? I know you do. ❜

❛ You're gonna burn in hell for trying to kill me, you motherfucker! ❜

❛ I'm so sorry. I should have been there. I should've been there for you. ❜

❛ I've had enough of this shit. ❜

❛ I will feast on your soul. ❜

❛ Feast on this, motherfucker! ❜

[heronpoxed]

Everyone is on fire about Tara and that's deserved!!! The hate I see the most comes from the self-insert/fic crowd. And the arguments are how they would have been better old ladies and handled Gemma and "fixed" Jax. LMAO. Lol even. It's petty jealousy.

I think she was set up, as so many love interests are in crime shows (skyler from breaking bad), to be hated because while the viewer loves the aggression and the world building Tara pointed out how insane and dangerous it all was. Jax isn't so hot and cool anymore once the club and Gemma aren't praising him. Once Tara actually shines a light on how self absorbed and pointless the whole outlaw setup is. Selling guns and later drugs isn't a "mission", it's not being an outlaw. It's just crime for money without any redeeming qualities. As was the clubs behavior towards women and their own children, while yelling "family and brotherhood above all else".

Anyway. Tara was right. And I am very sorry she had to die for Jax to finally realize it. She really wanted the best for him and saw him as a good man.

I’ve only ever read one SOA fanfic that was written in 2013 which is more like a love letter to Tara and her & Jax’s teenage years than anything else (its rlly good. It’s called Beginnings if you’re interested in reading) so I have absolutely no idea what the SOA fic crowd is like lol.

You’re right about this too. Tara was set up but I’m connecting this one to misogyny too. If reasonable female characters weren’t notoriously hated - no matter which relatively older show we’re talking about - we wouldn’t be thinking that they were set up. Hope this makes sense. I get the attachment to the world-building because the setting and the world of the story is the first thing that a consumer sees. In the case of Sons of Anarchy though, it was clear from the very first episode that the current club life wasn’t a right way to live. That was the whole point of Jax finding John’s manuscript; that was what got Jax determined to get the club out of the gun running business right? But i guess the attachment to the world made everyone ignore the whole point of the show and ultimately hate Tara because she never let anyone forget that.

That’s one of the reasons why I don’t want a spin-off/sequel with Abel and Thomas (something that many fans want sm). Tara and Jax didn’t sacrifice everything - including their lives - for their sons’ well-being only for them to get back to SAMCRO. It would mean that all of their sacrifices were for nothing!

Good point on the club’s behavior towards women and their families. The way they are with women is absolutely horrible which makes no sense because all of them would go to war for their significant others but then treat them with sm disrespect at home? I guess that comes down to their ego and toxic masculinity.

Tig, Chibs, Opie, Bobby ALL OF THEM had children yet they never cared lmao. All Chibs could talk about during the entirety of s3 was ‘his girls’ yet he never mentioned either Fiona or Kerrianne in later seasons. As much as Tig loved his kids, his way of life got Dawn killed and he was so extremely devastated!! I can’t believe that after Dawn’s death he never for even a split second questioned his choices regarding his life and the club.

I also hated that Opie’s children gradually started disappearing. i feel like not giving him any storylines with his kids in later seasons dehumanized him in a way. But i’ll never be sure if it was intended that way or not.

All of this collectively comes down to inconsistent writing. To me at least. I don’t know why screenwriters are always adamant on leaving so many loose ends and not digging a bit deeper into stuff like this.

And to answer your last point. Obviously Tara was right and I’m sorry that it took me watching this show twice to realize it but in my defense, I was 15, stupid and didn’t speak good enough English :’)

[ms-demeanor]

Some meandering thoughts about jokes about rape and cultural changes in the last decade and a half

Like, don’t get me wrong, I’m really glad we’re in a place now where we DO question rape jokes and it would be much harder to get away with “raping Jonah Hill is incredibly amusing” as the center of a scene the way that you could in 2007-2013 but I do kind of feel like we don’t talk about how sudden that change was enough.

People talk about how you should have always known that awful things are awful but if you’re surrounded by rape jokes and pedophilia jokes all the time and that’s what’s funny to the other kids around you and the adults in your lives and what makes up the jokes in the movies you watch then it’s hard to act like you always knew it was wrong.

Dead baby jokes were a HUGE thing when I was a teen and in my early twenties and sitting around swapping dead baby jokes was just a thing we did, and tossed in among them were things like:

A joke about incest with the punchline “Get off me pa, you’re crushing my smokes.”

This joke about a pedophile murdering a child.

Let’s not turn this rape into a murder.

And hell, look at the activity graph for “soap on a rope” on urban dictionary:

2014 starts a significant taper.

Letterboxd has their “sexual assault against men played for comedy page” and if you sort by release date there’s a downward trend with 2014 as a really stand-out year for rape jokes about men in popular movies:

2010 - 10

2011 - 12

2012 - 14

2013 - 12

2014 - 18 (jesus, which includes a prison rape joke in “Paddington”)

2015 - 9

2016 - 9

2017 - 11

2018 - 15

2019 - 4

2020 - 1

(this is of course with the caveat that this is only what has been documented so far)

Shock porn sites used to be a thing and they used to be a COMMON thing. A thing that would get remixed and have late night hosts make jokes about them and that got parody music videos.

So on the one hand I was really glad that in 2010 the hacker conference WASN’T asking me to make a rape joke on their tee shirt, but since Pool 2 Girl came up at every single “this is what defcon is about” discussion and some of the guys from the con had printed up “lemonparty.org” stickers to slap up around town it wouldn’t have been *surprising* if they’d been asking for that.

If you were a teenager in 2005 would you have known how much of a dick move goatse-ing people was? We didn’t have the same culture of trigger warnings (not that I disapprove of trigger warnings, they are good and I like them) and there was very much an attitude online at the time of “if you can’t handle it log off.”

I think the fappening was the turning point for a lot of this stuff - I think that was a big cultural moment that changed a lot of people’s attitudes really quickly and I’m seeing echos of that with what Chris Evans is dealing with right now: people are a lot faster to say “oh, that sucks, don’t be an asshole, report people for posting the pics” while I remember sitting and arguing in an imgur thread because there were a bunch of people saying “if you don’t like it don’t take nudes” about the celebrities who got caught in the icloud leak.

People look at Shane Dawson’s (admittedly gross and incredibly inappropriate) behavior with a poster of Willow Smith and act like it’s unprecedented***** but as someone who remembers not only Olsen Eighteenth Birthday countdowns but ALSO the jokes about fucking the Olsen twins that came BEFORE they were legal that’s just bizarre. Seeing people my age and older react to James Gunn’s pedophilic twitter jokes like they’re worse than Jay Leno’s jokes about Michael Jackson (which were made on TV! Across America! On a major network!) is just. It’s bizarre.

I’m glad we are where we are now, I’m glad that making rape jokes in public or jokes about incest or pedophilia (or murder or abortion) is less common and less okay (especially in children’s media, jesus fuck) and more likely to get criticized.

But I’m also pretty sure I’m going to get called a rape apologist by *someone* for saying “2010 was a different time, rape jokes were more common and we didn’t realize how shitty it was” when it really was a different time and rape jokes were more common and most people didn’t realize how shitty it was. I sure didn’t. I do now, and I’m glad I do now. But pretending that we should have ALWAYS known this, pretending that this was NEVER acceptable, pretending that it WASN’T a different time is ignoring the fact that for over a decade there was an entire genre of pedophilic rape jokes (that were frequently also racist) centered around one celebrity and that people told these jokes in public and in pop culture *all the time.*

Does that make it right? Fuck, I don’t know, shit is relative. It was still largely acceptable to electrocute gay kids and people tossed around the word “faggot” pretty freely. Mean Girls is full of jokes about how awful it is for people to think you’re a lesbian and Superbad is full of jokes about getting people shitfaced so they’ll sleep with you (so date rape) and there’s an entire “cute comedy” from the 80s starring Kurt Russel and Goldie Hawn that’s an extended rape-by-fraud joke. I think that as a whole we’re better now as people than we were in 2010 and the 90s and the 80s and the 50s and I don’t think that someone who made a sexist joke in the 80s is irredeemably evil and I don’t think people making rape jokes in the 2010s are rape apologists in 2020 and I wish there was a lot more understanding of both history and nuance in these conversations.

*****to be very, very clear Shane Dawson has been filmed kissing underage fans on the mouth and having explicit sexual conversations with his very young cousin - Dawson has done things that go beyond “inappropriate” and fall clearly into “wrong” “bad” “dangerous” “illegal” etc, which is all the more reason that it’s so strange to see people focusing on him fake masturbating on a poster of Willow Smith. YES doing that was gross but why is it even being compared to the way he’s been filmed interacting with fans? The lack of nuance, making “fake masturbating at a poster” and “creating a sexually abused puppet character” the same as “inappropriately touched and kissed minor fans and engaged a young child in explicit sexual conversations” is NOT GOOD. That is a bad thing. Two of those things are tasteless and two of those things are actively harmful and it’s the actively harmful stuff that we should be focusing on and part of why it’s really weird to see shit like “pizzagate conspiracist accuses James Gunn of making inappropriate jokes” like yes Gunn please don’t but can we maybe refocus and talk about the dude who can be pretty significantly assigned blame for a fucking shooting? https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2018/aug/01/james-gunn-alt-right-marvel-film-director-tweets

Actually, you know what, I thought I was done ranting, I’m not.

It’s purity culture.

YES you should attempt to do less harm with your language, YES you should attempt to not use slurs, YES you should try to avoid making rape jokes. But there’s an entire huge group of people who are willing to drag up rape jokes from a decade when rape jokes were REALLY REALLY common in order to say that nothing you say or do today matters.

And that same group is ALSO really interested in expanding the concept of what pedophilia is to include age differences in adults or liking the wrong style of drawing and it’s a purity culture silencing tactic and can we PLEASE stop pretending that gross, tasteless jokes are the same thing as actually sexually abusing people? Can we stop pretending that pointing out “rape jokes were more common fifteen years ago and I feel bad about it but that’s just the way it was and I don’t make jokes like that anymore” is the same as saying “rape isn’t bad and you shouldn’t make a big deal out of it.”

It’s always good to try to be a less shitty human but if you’re only allowed to grow and improve and be less shitty if you never fucked up in the first place then it’s all just calvinist bullshit and none of us could ever really be saved in the first place.

I dunno, dudes. We got so careful about disapproving of the wrong kind of language that we let a white supremacist concern troll Disney into firing a director who caught the attention of the alt right by shit-talking the president.

I think perhaps we need to reexamine some strategy here.

[purplesurveys]

1527

1. Is there a certain place or store you especially hate going to? Department stores. They’re usually too crowded for my liking and they’re also too large and vast for me to remember. I’d much rather go to individual shops that focus on a particular set of items - like if I needed shoes, I’m most likely to go inside a Nike or whatever so that my choices are already narrowed down from the get go.

2. When was the last time you made plans with someone? Kaye and I have been trying to arrange a meet-up for like a month now but our schedules are never aligned. Like when I had been free a few weeks back she pushed back our initial agreed-upon time to meet since apparently she booked a last-minute trip to Palawan lol and immediately after that was her grad. By the time she was free I had my own shit to do, so. We’re trying to reschedule again this Friday so I’m hoping it finally pushes through.

3. How long do leftovers usually sit in your fridge? It depends on how much of a hit they are in the household. Some dishes would last only a day and there are others we’d honestly forget about til it gets moldy and we’d be forced to throw it out. 4. What is something you do for other people that shows you care for them? Acknowledging them. It’s kind of hard to explain but it’s like, if they reach even just a minor accomplishment at work I’d congratulate them and chat them up for a bit about the milestone; or if they try something for the first time and post about it on socials I’d give it a heart reaction. I usually do this even with people I’m not close with or not necessarily friends with.

5. What was the last animal/pet that you met? Aki.

6. Is there anyone in your life with whom your opinion changes on frequently? You can say this, yes.

7. Do you ever look up set lists for concerts? If it’s a concert I’m going to, yes, I try to sneak around. I definitely did this during my last Paramore show because I wanted to see if they were going to do all my faves from After Laughter (spoiler: they did).

8. Have you ever woken up thinking that the dream you had was real? Yeah, but this normally isn’t a good sign. My dreams tend to feel more realistic when I’m in great stress or melancholy. 9. Have you ever kept a journal? Do you currently keep one? It’s this blog I have, and have had since like 2012? 2013? I don’t even remember anymore.

10. Is there a certain song or band who remind you of specific people? Of course. 11. Would you prefer to take a picture of yourself, or have someone else take it for you? Please, take the camera. I’ve always been garbage at selfies and RARELY take them.

12. How often do you style your hair differently from how you normally style it? I don’t care for hairdos. I just let my hair dry and then I place it in one of three main choices: a bun, a ponytail, or a half ponytail.

13. What was the last thing to really surprise you? I Literally woke up to my mom yelling up a goddamn storm this morning because my brother decided to be real stupid regarding his freshman enrolment for college. I won’t get into the details because it’s pretty complicated, but my animosity with him aside, what he did was pretty fucking dumb. Anyway, to answer the question, this surprised me in every sense of the word lol. The last thing I expected on a Saturday morning was to be woken up by a lot of yelling and reprimanding.

14. What did you do this past weekend? I didn’t make any plans this weekend and I am keeping it that way.

15. Is there something in particular you always seem to forget? Where I place things.

16. Have you ever found out that you have been sleep walking? I sleptwalk a few times as a toddler/kid. That’s it. I don’t think I ever did it as a teenager and now as an adult, and no one’s ever told me that I have, so.

17. What’s the last thing you promised yourself? That I’m taking myself out of the corporate world and some way, somehow, find a way to do the things I’m into and love and am passionate about.

18. Have you ever tried making something from one of those short cooking videos? How did it turn out? Hmm. Do dalgona coffee tutorials count? Hahaha mine turned out fine but I quickly learned it was only a trend for the aesthetics. It’s just milk and coffee that you have to work 10x as hard for lol.

19. When was the last time you had to wait in line for longer than a few minutes? Couple of months ago at the vet. There had been a couple of pet emergencies that needed to be prioritized, but all in all I had waited for a total of two hours. I was super annoyed by the end of the first hour and started to feel bad for Aki since there were no fans or aircon in the waiting area, but then one of the staff asked for my number and suggested that I can wait in the car (where I can keep the aircon on), and that they’ll just call me when Aki’s turn is up.

20. Have you ever written a review for a product you bought online? Yes, especially if I’ve bought from a small business.

21. Would you rather go out somewhere with your friends or stay at home and hang out with them instead? I’m honestly happy with both; it’s the time with them I look forward to, not where we happen to be.

22. Do you ever interact with any brands/companies online? Only if I have anything to raise/complain about.

23. How happy are you with your current job? If you don’t have a job, what’s something you think you think you would dislike about working? I’ve been very clear with my feelings on this blog but to reiterate, I feel like I’ve pretty much reached the finish line with it; the honeymoon days of genuinely finding satisfaction and worth in what I do are over, and I start and end the day feeling like a robot. I know the realistic, grown-up route to this is to suck it up (because who in the corpo world is actually happy?) but...that just doesn’t sit right with me. I have lots of interests and passions I could be doing something with, and I’m just looking for that golden ticket to like, be able to do something in a museum or like a historical commission or whatever. 24. Is there anything you seem especially sensitive to, such as sounds, smells, etc? The sound of a door slamming sends my brain into a panic. That was my mom’s typical move whenever she’d get mad when I was a kid, so the trauma lives on. Even if someone does it accidentally, it always feels like my heart drops and I’d need a couple of minutes to compose myself.

25. What was the last board game you played? I’m not super sure when it comes to board games.

[ashintheairlikesnow]

Guns Ain’t a Plague

I wrote some version of this story over and over. This is the version I apparently emailed to a friend in 2013 and just rediscovered in my inbox. I am staring at this and realizing how long ago 2013 was now. Oh my gosh.

Background: I was already very much all about post-apocalyptic stuff, but this takes place in a world entirely unlike - and yet strikingly like - our own. In a world where war and disease once tore the land apart, an isolated, caged city of children struggles to survive.

Until one decides to leave.

Oh man somewhere in my stuff I have all my old maps and descriptions of the different countries and the war and... I wrote so much stuff for this universe/storyline...

-

The young woman crouched where the last of the road crumbled into broken stone. It had been crushed when they exited the city, taking their horses and carriages, doctors and soldiers and history, with them. Her feet were bare and she dug her toes into the warm red earth between the cracked rock. The muscles in her legs tensed, she placed one hand for balance on the ground.

She would have to run like wind if she was going to survive this.

“Don’t,” came Tor’s familiar voice behind her. She jumped up, wondering why she was even surprised he had followed her. She had, after all, been the one to teach him how to do it. She turned around, to look him in the eye, heart aching at the idea that if she didn’t time this just right, she would never see him again.

“Ed,” The boy said in the same pleading tone, hands held out to grab her, “don’t. You can’t even think it. You’ll die, same as they all do!”

Ed rolled her eyes and shot him a baleful glare, but she was bluffing and they both knew it. The toughness fell off of her face almost immediately, and she grabbed the much younger boy, pulling him into a fierce hug.

The two of them looked so alike that they seemed mirrored, almost, the teenager and the adult just barely ten years older than him. Ed’s skin was the same dusky red-brown as Tor’s, their hair the same rich black. It even hung in the same small twists, cut short and close to their heads, although Tor’s was cut a little longer. The only difference was in their ages and in their eyes. Ed’s eyes were a deep, rich pure brown, but Tor’s were green.

Ed thought she was somewhere near twenty-five; no one was completely sure on ages here. She knew Tor had been something like two when she’d found him; herself a ragged orphan, hearing him crying from two buildings over and simply taking him home. It was better than letting him die.

“I should’ve known you’d follow me,” She said, shaking her head. “And if you’re here… Jedder came too, didn’t he?”

“I run faster’n Jedder,” Tor said, clinging to her even harder. His arms around her waist felt like they were crushing her organs and she attempted to try and loosen his grip, with no luck. “Don’t die, Ed!”

“Won’t die, Tor,” she replied. “Don’t think I will anyway. How long they been standin’ there, those towers? Ten years now? Every gun’s got to run out of bullets sometime, right?”

“Not those guns.” Torrin gestured at the small turret towers stationed every twenty feet or so as far as they both could see around the place designated as the ‘edge’ of the city. Wherever roads had gone any farther, they had been smashed to bits until the towers were up. It felt like a river of grass, weeds, broken rock and bone surrounded them, surrounded this whole ruined city, a city that no living person had ever seen before it was a pile of ghosts and disease.

Ed, for a moment, allowed her grip on Tor to be as tight as his grip on her.

“Besides,” he continued with his face still pushed against her shoulder, head still tucked just under her chin. “who’s gonna feed us if you’re dead? Who’s gonna take care of us? You always take care of us, Eddi! Always. Since everybody died you take care of us. You can’t just stop ‘cause your feet got itchy.”

“Tor, you know damn well that ain’t why I want to try this time. We can’t stay here forever. This place is full of us, we can’t keep enough food to go on livin’ like this.  It’s been over a hundred years since this city fell, by my parents’ reckoning, since they just left everyone to die. Left a city full of kids with a bunch of dead bodies and bullets, fat lot of good it’s doin’ us now. The Oracle and her folk may like this place, an’ the Keepers may think we’re stuck here carin’ for the dead, but I think… I think somebody needs to get out and prove we still exist.”

There were footsteps behind them and they turned, almost as one, with Tor’s hand still twisted in Ed’s shirt.

The sweaty, fast-breathing young man who came running up to them was not like them in the slightest. His skin and hair were the same flat and dull gray-white. Compared to Tor and Ed, his arms seemed too long, he was too skinny, his hands and feet just a mite too big to be human. His eyes were unsettling to everyone but his little chosen family; wide and far apart, set on a diagonal line in his face, they were black. He broke into a relieved smile at seeing them both standing there. “Eddi! Tor caught up with you then. He runs faster’n me!”

“That’s what I said!” Tor was entirely too proud of himself. Ed bit her lip to stop from chiding him for it.

Jedder stopped, leaning over to lean his hands flat on his thighs to try and stop gasping quite so much.

“’Course he does. Plesalka never could run to save your lives,” Ed said with a responding smile and managed to extricate her shirt from Tor’s grasp. She turned back to survey the turrets again. Old and rusting over time, evidence of Plesalka scientific genius, the kind of machines and creations that neither Letenje like Ed and Tor or the Teci had ever been able to match. Their last apology for their part in this before the Exile began.

She knew about the reason those turrets existed only her parents had hoarded the scribble writings of their own ancestors; her great-great grandmother had been alive to witness the Plague and the death, had survived long enough to make sure her children were as protected as possible.

In the end, there was only so much protection to give; scarcity of food and resources meant that no one had a very long life span here.

It was one of the reasons she was so aware of her need to leave.

“I’m going to try whether you two like it or not. I’m going to try on my own, got it? And if I make it over that rise to the other side, I will shut those turrets down somehow. I’ll bash ‘em in with one of those twisted hunks of metal lyin’ all over the damn place. Once they’re broken, you two can get over and we can leave together. We’re not gonna die here where they left all of us, thinkin’ we’d be gone eventually.” Old grief twisted in her heart; she’d lost both her parents when she was 12, when they had gone out scavenging and been caught in the middle of a battle between the old Oracle’s gang and other Scavs like them. It had been a long, lonely, horrible year before she’d found Jedder.

She crouched down again, curling her fingers around one of the broken pieces of the road here at the edge. It was heavier than it looked, warm from the constant rays of the sun. Even with the lean muscle she’d picked up in ten years of scavenging everything she ate she left out a small grunt of effort as she threw it straight at the closest turret. She missed by a long arc. The gun did not respond or move to follow the stone’s movement. “They’re gettin’ worse. They used to shoot the rocks, too.”

Jedder and Tor shared a look behind her back, unsure of what to do. Jedder, at fifteen, was still nine years Ed’s junior and Tor at twelve was a full twelve years younger. She had been as much a mother to them as a teenage girl could be when she’d found them. Jedder had been found first, a little Scav just barely staying alive by stealing from the gangs, unwelcome like all Plesalka were… Tor just two years old, crying inside a makeshift nursery, his parents dead on the floor and all their food stores stolen. She had taken them in, even knowing Jedder being Plesalka would make it harder on them.        

No one ever stopped being angry, especially since in a century the stories to explain what had happened had gotten weirder and more elaborate as told by the remaining survivors. Even the truth made it hard to forgive either the Plesalka or the Teci for what they had created, what they had done in their war on each other… even if kids like Jedder were so far removed from those events as to be a whole separate people by now.

“Eddi,” Tor said, and now his voice was starting to take on a edge of nagging worry, “Eddi, what if this doesn’t work and you die?”

“Then you and Jedder go on livin’,” Ed replied without looking back at them.

She was surveying all possible obstacles between her and the turrets. Rocks. Weeds.

Bodies.

The last made her shudder, made the already roiling pit of nervousness that was her stomach threaten to riot up her meager lunch. Some of the bodies out here weren’t even bodies anymore. It was mostly bones left for her to look at, though now and then she could see evidence of newer deaths. Some kids still went crazy and made a run for it. She herself probably counted as crazy, just to be thinking about it. Still. There was a lot of bone out here. A lot of dead people dumped here at the edge to warn away anyone who might see them, to keep visitors out, to keep the descendents of Pohroma citizens in.

Barefoot, you want to run through a burial ground, she thought, wondering if it would be the last thing she did. “I’ve taught you both how to live if you lost me. If you think you can’t stick it out just the two of you, well, the other Plesalka that’re still alive would take Jedder in, if he went to them. Tor, you know the Oracle or the Keepers would have you. They could keep you safe. Don’t you dare join up with any of the Scav gangs, though.”

“We want you,” Jedder said stubbornly. “Besides, even if you died we’d just stick together. We don’t know any other way to be but the three of us.”

“Then you better be prayin’ to somebody’s god I don’t die now, because I’m going to do this.” She didn’t wait for their response but just launched herself forward with all the speed her legs could give her.  Not being able to crouch down and prepare first had only cost her half a second, but nonetheless she felt a rush of fear that it would be a half-second too many.

She felt Tor’s fingers clutch the back of her shirt, but he couldn’t get a grip and she twisted away from him easily, running like the devil was at her heels.

There was a rusty shrieking coming from turrets that had been left abandoned, not repaired or even touched in almost twenty years. The sound filled the air, coming from nearly ten turrets who were all slowly, inexorably pointing in her direction as she ran. Birds, having made nests in the openings, took to the air in a sudden frenzy of wings and shrieking birdcalls. For a moment, the sky was dark with them.

Ed ran.

She dodged larger rocks and the corpses of both people and animals shot dead by the turrets. Dogs, rats, foxes, cats, people… all just empty bones, she told herself, trying not to let her feet even brush them as she went past.

She ran.

She caught a glint and looked up, realizing that she could see the sun shining off all the metal casing on the ground for every bullet these huge guns had ever fired. She was caught by the shine of them just long enough to distract her.

And she tripped.

She had to have tripped on a rock, she could feel the rough of it scrape all the way down from mid-calf to her ankle as she fell and went rolling, coming to a halt only when she hit another big chunk of rock a few feet away. The breath was knocked out of her and she could only gasp, frozen, realizing that the horrible groaning of the moving metal had finally come to an end.

She looked up, and was looking directly up the barrel of one of the turrets, and it was aiming at her. She could not move. She thought of her parents, long dead from the violence in this city. She thought of finding Tor at two years old, Jedder at the time the only one who keep the little toddler from crying all the time. She thought of how they had lived the last ten years as a family, kept each other safe. She thought of every time she had ever seen a wild animal gunned down by these turrets, ripped to absolute shreds by the bullets.

She flinched at the sudden click of the gun.

Click?

It echoed, bouncing off against the walls and back again and at least twenty of the turrets were clicking in a chorus and Ed began, despite the aftermath of adrenaline still pumping, to laugh.

The sound of her laughter was something just below a scream, hysterical and echoing, bouncing off against the old stone walls behind Tor and Jedder, making them jump.

It took some effort and her ankle ached in a way that told her this victory wasn’t coming to her without some price to pay, but she began to hobble back to Jedder and Tor, arms out to them, spread as wide as her smile.

“They’re empty!” She called out above the noise. “Every single one!”

Only a moment of hesitation, a look of pure relief shared between the two boys, and then they came pounding across the earth until they could throw their arms around her, the both of them at once.

“They’re empty,” she whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of Tor’s head, to the fuzzy twists of his hair, before turning to lean her forehead against Jedder’s cheek. “I knew it. They never did come back to replace ‘em, not since before I was born, at least my da said. They had to run out sooner or later.” She squeezed the two of them even tighter, then finally let them go. Reluctantly, they let go of her as well.

“Empty,” she said one more time, savoring the taste of the word.

“So we can go,” Jedder breathed out. “We can leave. I don’t. I’ve never been outside the city. No one has. We don’t even know if there’s other people out there or if everyone died in the Plague, if it hit other places, too.”

 “I don’t think it did,” Tor said, thoughtfully. “Cause otherwise why would they have had to send people to keep us locked in by replacin’ bullets, ever?” Curling his fingers in Ed’s patched and worn shirt, he shook his head. “Bet there’s a whole world full of people out there. Maybe they don’t even know about us.”

Ed smiled, but it was a smile entirely without humor.

“Let’s go show the bastards we’re still alive.”

[lilatreus]

im new to the ac fandom and i didnt know there were any books should i be reading them?? or are there certain ones that i absolutely need to read or would i be okay if i skip them?

Yeah it’s okay to skip them if you want! They’re mostly there to give some more insight on some of the characters. If you want to read them but you don’t have to money to buy the books, you can read them here. I actually have all the books already on paper copy so I would definitely recommend buying them if you really enjoy them.

There’s also some comics and graphic novels about them too which I have included in on the master list. They actually follow the modern storyline of you want to read up on that. If you want to read them just do readcomicsonline. They have them all, only watch out for ads.

Anyway here’s the master list, it’s pretty long won’t lie:

The books, in order of strictly historical events:

Assassin’s Creed Odyssey by Gordon Doherty (2018)

Basically this books gives the canonical story to assassin’s creed odyssey following Kassandra around Greece. If you had the “best” or good ending from the story then you’re probably going to be upset with the book. I actually liked it and if you were ever confused about the game then this is definitely for you to read.

Assassin’s Creed Origins: Desert Oath by Oliver Bowden (2017)

This book takes place years before Origins. It follows Bayek who a teenager at the time. We learn how Bayek and Aya start their relationship and it kind of explains some of the side missions that talk about Bayek’s past. If you love Bayek and Aya’s relationship you will love this book.

[ insert for whenever an ac valhalla book is written ]

Assassin’s Creed: The Secret Crusade by Oliver Bowden (2011)

This book is the one I’m currently rereading, so it takes place with the father of Marco Polo talking about Altaïr’s life. It talks about his—Altaïr’s—dad within the first few chapters, events that happened in the game, and then what happens after. It gives more insight on what happened between the events of ac one and the little bits of scenes we see in ac revelations of Altaïr in game. If you want to know how Maria and Altaïr got together you’ll like this book it’s very sweet and I love how smitten Altaïr was. If you love Atlmal (Altaïr and Malik) you’ll also like this book but it will crush you.

Assassin’s Creed: Renaissance by Oliver Bowden (2009)

This follows Ezio through assassin’s creed two. Literally just the book version of the game. Does talk about how Ezio and Cristina got together and a few of the memories you get to play in Brotherhood are in this book. I like it. It pretty much follows the game exactly so if you want to skip it, you can but still a really good book that I recommend reading.

Assassin’s Creed: Brotherhood by Oliver Bowden (2010)

Follows the plot of the game. It’s pretty similar to it as opposed to a few differences. While I like this book, I will always say the game is better than this book entirely. Still, it’s pretty good and explains a lot of plot.

Assassin’s Creed: Revelations by Oliver Bowden (2011)

It explains why Ezio is doing what he does in the game. Why he’s there and what is reasoning is. You get a little small bit about Claudia but that’s it. Ezio does, in book, visit Leonardo on the last few days before the artist dies :( that’s pretty much it. Only some minor differences to the game. If you’re looking for something about Desmond, you won’t find it in this book.

Assassin’s Creed: Black Flag by Oliver Bowden (2013)

I’ll be honest I only read this book once so my memory is pretty poor on it but from what I can remember it’s about Edward and Caroline and how they got together. And then there’s something about Anne Boney and Edward towards the end I believe. Kind of explains his backstory from the little scenes we’re shown in the game I think? (Correct me if I’m wrong on this one but I’m certain that’s the gist of it).

Assassin’s Creed: Forsaken by Oliver Bowden (2012)

This one was the first assassin’s creed book I read. Now fair warning: if you do not like Haytham Kenway, I strongly advise you to not read this book. It is all about Haytham until the final few chapters and then Connor takes over the book once you’ve killed him in game. This book explains how he (Haytham) came to be apart of the Templars and how Edward dies. It talks about his relationship with Ziio and how he built the Templar order up during the seven years war. I’ll be honest it was okay when I first read it because I was like 11 and the only other thing I had read was like just percy jackson. Looking back on this book though, it’s not that great. I do not like Haytham at all so I, personally, would not recommend this book. I went in reading it expecting for it to be about Connor and I was very disappointed and upset that it wasn’t. So you can skip this book if you like because the only thing it does is give insight to a lot of what Haytham does.

Assassin’s Creed: Unity by Oliver Bowden (2014)

This is my favorite book. This is about Arno reading Elise’s diary after she passed. There’s little bits where Arno writes in here and there throughout the novel. It’s pretty sad I won’t lie. Explains how Elise grew up, what she did during the parts where we didn’t see her in game, and talks about how she felt during the parts where we did see her in game. Basically at the end of the book it’s Elise asking Arno to please help seek unity and stop the war between the Templars and Assassins.

Assassin’s Creed: Underworld by Oliver Bowden (2015)

This book follows Jayadeep Mir, also known to us as Henry Green. There’s two parts to this book. The first part takes place six years before the events of syndicate and you get to really learn about the twin’s father and then the second part takes place during the events of the game. It talks about Evie and Henry’s relationship during the second part and it’s pretty good!

There are no books about assassin’s creed chronicles (ac China, India, and Russia) if you’re wondering why they’re missing :(

The comics:

*most of these take place during the modern storyline I’ll try my best to explain when they come in and how it adds up to the new our modern storyline at the end

Assassin’s Creed the Fall

There’s three issues with this it’s just a graphic novel honestly. Takes place with the main character from AC Chronicles: Russia

Assassin’s Creed the Chain

Graphic Novel sequel to the Fall

Assassin’s Creed Brahman

Written by the same people who wrote The Fall and The Chain, however this focuses on Arbaaz Mir who is the main character from Assassin’s Creed Chronicles: India.

Now from what I’ve seen, correct me if I’m wrong, but the templar and assassin comics pretty much take place around the same time.

Assassin’s Creed: Trial by Fire

Assassin’s Creed issue #1, #2, #3, #4, #5

Assassin’s Creed Templars: Black Cross

Assassin’s Creed Templars issue #1, #2, #3, #4, #5

Assassin’s Creed: Setting Sun

Assassin’s Creed issue #6, #7, #8, #9, #10

Assassin’s Creed Templars: Cross of War

Assassin’s Creed Templars issue issue #6, #7, #8, #9

Assassin’s Creed: Homecoming

Assassin’s Creed issue #11, #12, #13, #14

Assassin’s Creed: Uprising

Common Ground Vol 1: issue #1, #2, #3, #4

Infection Point Vol 2: issue #5, #6, #7, #8

Finale vol 3: #9, #10, #11, #12

Assassin’s Creed Reflections (pretty much a stand alone I would say, focuses entirely on past assassins but canon to the templar comics).

Reflections 1: modern story focuses on Otso Berg historical story focuses on Ezio where we learn Ezio is implied to have hooked up with the woman who in the Mona Lisa painting.

Reflections 2: same thing for modern story but now Otso is looking into Altaïr’s story. We get to see Maria, Altaïr, and their son Darim.

Reflections 3: Otso is now looking into Edward Kenway.

Reflections 4: Otso looks into Connor and we see him with his daughter. It’s super cute this issue is my favorite.

Last Descendants

The Last Descendants (Novel)

Locus: issues 1 - 4

The Last Descendants: Tomb of the Khan (novel)

The Last Descendants: Fate of the Gods (novel)

Assassin’s Creed: the French Books (these have all been translated into english and theyre all graphic novels).

These books I would say to skip. If you want to read it you can, however the modern storyline has been said to no longer be canon anymore. The historical storyline however is still canon but not actually necessary to the plot of anything.

Cycle 1

Assassin’s Creed 1: Desmond

Assassin's Creed 2: Aquilus

Assassin's Creed 3: Accipiter

Assassin's Creed 4: Hawk

Assassin's Creed 5: El Cakr

Assassin's Creed 6: Leila

Cycle 2

Assassin’s Creed: Conspiracies

This takes place during WW2

Vol 1: Die Glocke

Vol 2: Project Rainbow

Cycle 3

Assassin’s Creed: Bloodstone

This takes place during the Vietnam War. A follow up on Conspiracies.

Vol 1: book one

Vol 2: book two

The last two I have listed (Conspiracies and Bloodstone) are canon to the comics’ modern storyline as well as the historical. Cycle one is not. They’re both graphic novels. Also I want to say that I have not read these two yet so idk if I’ll be allowed to recommend them but they’re there. I have no idea where they’re placed in terms of modern storyline bc these two are very confusing seeing as they originally were canon then told they weren’t and now they are again.

Other comics that I really have no idea where to place but they do exist if you want to read them:

Assassin’s Creed: Origins (mini series)

Four issues for this comic takes place following Aya and her journey. You get to see what happens with Cleopatra. I personally really like this comic you get some lore on the Brotherhood and Aya so it’s good. Read this after the video game. (Pretty positive it takes place after the game events but before the DLC: hidden ones)

Assassin’s Creed: Valhalla: Song of Glory (mini series)

There are three issues in this. Haven’t read this one yet, however it focuses on Eivor. Read this alongside the video game.

Okay so for canon timeline purposes here is the exact order of everything I’ve listed and where they fall in for strictly the modern storyline:

1 The Fall and the Chain (also called subject four which is just the two of the books into one)

2 Desmond’s story

3 Brahman

4 Assassin’s Creed: Trial by Fire 1 - 5

5 Assassin’s Creed Templars: Black Cross 1 - 5

6 Assassin’s Creed: Setting Sun 6 - 10

6 Assassin’s Creed Templars: Cross of War 6 - 9

7 Assassin’s Creed: Homecoming 11 - 14

Assassin’s Creed Reflections (stand alone don’t have to read if you don’t want to but if you do, read along side the templar stories.)

8 Assassin’s Creed Syndicate modern storyline takes place here

9 Assassin’s Creed: Uprising

10 Origins modern storyline starts here and continues for assassin’s creed odyssey and valhalla*

*If you’re confused as to why Juno isn’t in the game plot anymore the comics explains it. Ubisoft has completely moved her story to the comics entirely and in doing so completely finished the story.

[astrolornb]

hbd to Hayao Miyazaki! (Capricorn sun/Aries moon)

Iconic animator, director, and screenwriter Hayao Miyazaki (b. January 5, 1941) turned 80 years old on January 5, 2021.

Miyazaki is the co-founder of Studio Ghibli and acclaimed for his whimsical and fantastical animated feature-length films. He is known for writing stories with environmental and social messages, which often centre independent girls as protagonists.

His first breakthrough directorial film, Nausicäa of the Valley of The Wind (1984) follows a young princess who fights to defend her home community from war and environmental devastation in a post-apocalyptic world. Miyazaki adapted this screenplay based on a manga he wrote.

To be frank, I find I can’t really watch this film anymore (after having watched it maybe 3 or 4 times?), with the amount of war and fighting in it (the accompanying music is also kinda intense). However, this was once my favourite film by Miyazaki and I still recommend watching if you haven’t already seen it.

Today, Spirited Away (2001) and Kiki’s Delivery Service (1989) remain some of my favourite films.

In Spirited Away, a ten-year old girl named Chihiro must save her parents from the spirit world by overcoming obstacles in a bathhouse full of spirits and outsmarting a powerful witch. I think this film both fascinated and slightly scared me as a kid, but I’ve grown to love it more as an adult. This description truly doesn’t quite do the film justice as the cast of unique characters each add a different twist to Chihiro’s journey towards bravery.

In Kiki’s Delivery Service, a young girl must leave home to train as a witch as per the traditions of her village. However, she starts to lose her powers when on her own and must regain them in order to survive. Kiki was truly an angsty teen of her time. As an entrepreneur, she basically delivered bread UberEats-style on her broom, to boot!

How many other teenage witches can you name who fly across the sea while listening to the radio? I once dressed up as Kiki for Halloween.

The above mentioned films were all written and directed by Hayao Miyazaki.

When I found out Miyazaki’s birthday, it came as no surprise that he was born as a Capricorn. I say this in reference to watching the NHK docu-series “10 Years with Hayao Miyazaki,” which highlights his obsessive and regimented work schedule and habits, reeking of Capricorn stereotypes.

“Placing value on the act of working hard is an incredible mistake…Working hard, it’s just something you do. If you don’t, nothing worthwhile will come about.” - Hayao Miyazaki (source)

Capricorns are Earth signs who are passionate and driven, above all else.

I don’t know about you, but in my life, Capricorns are always grinding (staying on top of everything!). These include successful artists and freelancers who are committed to their practice and communities (often while working multiple jobs), pushing through law/grad school during a pandemic, and dedicated to showing up and caring for their friends and family.

Tweets by astrologer Danielle Ayoka (@mysticxlipstick)

Maybe this devout sense of purpose and passion is what makes them come off as so wise beyond their years.

Capricorns are the epitomy of old souls. Their practicality makes them seem like a grandparent, regardless of their actual age.

“I’m so excited!” Miyazaki smiles with grandpa joy as he releases the tape from the video camera that he installed in his car to record as he drives. A little strange, perhaps, yet in the first part of the docu-series, it truly offers a pragmatic glimpse into his approach to work. (In this case, the study of daily motion.)

Screencapture from 10 Years with Hayao Miyazaki by NHK

Of an emotional nature, another Capricorn stereotype is that they come off as cool and distant. In the same docu-series, viewers later witness Miyazaki walk out of the middle of his son’s film premiere. Ouch.

For Miyazaki, quality of work > everything else.

Tweet by karen han (@karenyhan)

In the documentary film the Kingdom of Dreams and Madness (2013), viewers watch Miyazaki going off on a team of animators, even making some cry after giving his feedback.

Capricorns set high standards. More so for themselves than for others though. However, beyond his Capricorn sun, Miyazaki has an Aries moon. The moon represents a significant emotional aspect of our inner selves.

What does this mean? According to the AstroTwins,

Aries is ruled by Mars, the planet of aggression and war, which can make you temperamental and straight-up combative. With your fiery emotions, you get frustrated easily, blowing up at the slightest provocations. Although your temper tantrums pass quickly, you don’t always realize how much havoc your rage spells can wreak. The fallout could take years to live down, if the bridge isn’t permanently burned.

...

Aries is the first sign of the zodiac, and this moon sign makes you an initiator who likes to be number one. A warrior at heart, you’ll courageously champion any cause, project or person you believe in. You have a star quality, but your competitive streak can be fierce! 

Hayao Miyazaki’s birth chart (via astro-charts.com)

This combination of steadfast hard work (Capricorn sun/Earth sign) and fierce independence (Aries moon/Fire sign) likely contributes much to how Miyazaki has attained his status as such an accomplished filmmaker and artist.

While this blog post is a tribute to the great Miyazaki, it is also an acknowledgement that he is an imperfect person, as we all are. Humans are complex creatures. Like so many of us, he is someone who has caused hurt and someone who has experienced significant loss. And, at the same time, he is someone who has created so much beauty, too.

Screenshot from The Kingdom of Dreams and Madness (2013)

To many fans disappointment, Miyazaki retired from filmmaking after The Wind Rises (2013). However, in true Capricorn style, he has returned to work and emerged from retirement to direct a new film titled How Do You Live? which he intends to dedicate to his grandson.

With this forthcoming film, the Studio Ghibli animators have been tasked to draw more frames by hand than ever before. In the slow and steady Earth-sign-led process, they are producing a single minute of animation per month with a team of 60 people.

Studio Ghibli producer and general manager Toshio Suzuki says, “That means 12 months a year, you get 12 minutes worth of movie. Actually, we’ve been working on this film for three years, so that means we have 36 minutes completed so far. We’re hoping it will finish in the next three years.” Wow.

In Japan, an 80th birthday is referred to as the “umbrella celebration” (sanju 傘寿) in reference to the shape of the characters. The abbreviation of the character for “umbrella” (傘) can be read as “80″ by overlapping numbers 8 (八) and 10 (十).

Astrology writer Gala Mukamalova, once wrote about the power we give years. In an astrological love letter, she offered this to our hardworking, stubborn goat friends:

“But you, Capricorn, you who are still here, still wind howling through trees, still a leaf clinging to this life—forgiveness is something you can learn. How to give it, yes, but mostly how to receive it.”

Despite how much I enjoy projecting onto famous people based on their birth charts, I don’t truly know all that haunts Miyazaki or drives him to create as an artist, a son, a father, and a survivor of war.

Yet still, I hope this year may allow Miyazaki and his Capricorn sun to pursue forgiveness of self, whatever that may look like. I have no doubt that he will continue to find success with his work to come. Hopefully his Aries moon can tread lighter and enable him to act more kindly towards his studio team, too. After all, it is 2021.

Happy 80th birthday, Hayao Miyazaki. ☂️

[liam-93-productions]

For the last 10 or so months, most people's lives have seriously slowed down. With shelter-in-place and lockdown orders mandated around the world, it's no surprise that many celebrities's once-busy and hectic public lives have come to a startling halt, but this hasn't necessarily been the case for Liam Payne.

Besides churning out new music, the singer has been very busy this year. Not unlike most of us, he's joined TikTok and discovered the benefits of sustainability, (...) and even held a livestream concert series. Long story short, Payne's life hasn't changed pace, so it makes a lot of sense that he's updating his résumé with yet another accomplishment: being the face of a sexy new fragrance.

The partnership itself isn't new — Payne has been an ambassador for Hugo for the last few years — but the presence of Payne's smouldering stare in the latest campaign for Hugo Man seems fitting. After all, 2020 was the year of significant anniversaries for both the brand and Payne: Hugo Man not only celebrated its 25th birthday, but July 23 marked the 10th anniversary of One Direction. While 1D fans didn't get exactly what they'd hoped for (i.e. a band reunion), even the most soured superfans can feel a sense of pride for Payne's personal evolution.

Ahead, Payne shares what he's been up to while staying home, his plans for 2021, the tattoo he loves (now), and how an unlikely TikTok collaboration came to be.

Liam Payne On His Signature Scent as a Teen

It's a universal truth that most teenagers do not smell great (or at least smell a lot better after moving past puberty and skipping the body spray housed inside a neon plastic bottle). While Payne spent most of his formative years in a band, he's not exactly exempt from our collective smelly past.

"I think when we're teenagers we choose those really cheap scents that everybody seems to have and they smell like a changing room most times," he told POPSUGAR. "I hope my own personal journey has been good, but I'm sure there must have been points when it wasn't." Despite what those handmade One Direction candles would tell you, Payne most certainly smells great now: modern, masculine, and after about 20 minutes, a bit woody.

While most of us could've maybe guessed what Payne smells like on a daily basis — introduce us to a 20-something guy who doesn't appreciate a balsam note — we would've never assumed his favourite scent that's not a fragrance: history. To be specific, really old houses. "I just moved into a house and it's really old. You know when you can smell that the house has history? That smell," he confirmed. "That smell is quite nice."

Liam Payne On His Most Regrettable Tattoo

Payne is not the first person to regret a tattoo, but could maybe teach a masterclass on learning to love yours. So, what is — or was — his most regrettable ink? The chevron-like row of arrows on his right arm. "The guy put the design on me and it was way too big, but I hadn't got the heart to tell him because I was kind of afraid," Payne said. "I think I fell asleep on the desk in the tattoo shop, it was the most random thing, ever. Then, I woke up the next morning and my arm was hurting. I was like, oh no, that didn't happen, did it?"

Payne revealed that he quickly went to Google to search for ways to remove the tattoo, but as you'll see, he never really went through with it. In fact, the large piece served as inspiration for one of his collections with Hugo (you can spot it on the collar of some of the pieces).

So, how does he feel about it now? "It was a beautiful mistake," he said. "I feel like tattoos do become a part of you, like a scar or something. They'll always be there and you always grow to love them."

Liam Payne On His Most Recent Tattoo

According to some experts, the post-coronavirus tattoo boom is inevitable. Even we can admit that we've been eyeing a few designs over the last year. As for Payne, he doesn't entirely relate. "I yearn for more tattoos, but I only ever get tattoos when I'm a little bit drunk," he said. "I can't sit with an idea and then hope I'm going to get it. I'm not one of those people.

While Payne is one of those spur-of-the-moment kind of tattoo lovers, he admitted that he's excited to reunite with one of his favourite LA-based artists, Nikko Hurtado. So, no, he doesn't know what kind of tattoo he might get once lockdown is over, but he can confirm the very last tattoo he got before everything changed. "I got my initials on my hand in case I ever can't remember who I am," he said, referencing the "L" and "P" inked on his left and right hands, respectively. "At least I've got the letters to start with."

Liam Payne On Collabing With TikTok's Abby Roberts

After the year we've had, nothing really shocks us anymore — except maybe coming across Liam Payne in clown makeup on TikTok. If he made a surprising appearance on your For You Page this year, you may have wondered how the musician ended up on the app collaborating with one of its most popular makeup artists, Abby Roberts. Turns out, Payne had seen some of Roberts's videos before and initiated the harmonious partnership in anticipation for his Halloween concert special. And so their viral TikToks were born. (Seriously, the first video he posted with Roberts has since earned four millions likes.)

Just because we were surprised by this collaboration doesn't mean Payne is a stranger to undergoing seriously long makeup transformations. Remember those intro videos One Direction made for the Take Me Home Tour in 2013? The boys went undercover in London thanks to prosthetics and wigs. Tl;dr hijinks ensued, fans loved it, and Payne still remembers what it was like to be turned into Harry Styles's elderly husband. "I think I was in the chair for five hours while I was being made into an old man," he recalled of the prosthetics. "It was quite fun, but watching yourself age before the mirror was a very daunting prospect, but it was a lot of fun to play [that] part."

Liam Payne On His Commitment to Sustainability

Like many of us, Payne has become more aware of just how crucial a eco-conscious lifestyle can be for our present and future. As a Hugo ambassador, he's familiar with the importance of sourcing sustainable materials and ingredients when creating both clothes and fragrances. Perhaps the sexiest thing about the relaunched Hugo Man is that it's housed inside a box made from recycled paper. Even sexier, Payne admits he's made his own personal commitment to recycling while staying home. "It's made me take a longer look at myself and the way I treat things," he said. Even he agrees we all have to start somewhere.

Liam Payne On His Plans For 2021

Everyone's plans and expectations for this new year are very different, but Payne's already got his eye on some downtime. "I feel like because we didn't know if we had to completely stop working or whether we were even going to have anything to do this year, we worked as hard as we could constantly since March," he said. "It feels for all of us that 2021 is going to hit a little bit of a refresh button."

Still, even he can admit while we'd love to leave a lot of 2020 behind, there is one thing he'll take with him: quality time. "Life's been on a bit of treadmill for a long time and I think when you live in big cities, like London and LA, everybody's always go go go all the time," he said, "I think it's been important this year that we've got to learn to take some time for ourselves and stop and enjoy these moments."

[destielficarchive]

Deleted Author Profile: TamrynEradani

Author and co-author of more than 50 fics, for a while TamrynEradani was one of the most popular authors in the fandom, especially known for their break-out BDSM fic, “Carry On.” They’re also one of the easiest deleted authors to talk about, because they gave warning before they deleted so people could save files and (as far as I know, anyway) gave blanket permission for copies of their works to be distributed. 

Work Highlights:

Carry On, and its Timestamp (Explicit). 148,087 words (main story); 5,985 words (timestamp). No Archive Warnings Apply.

When Sam gets into Stanford, Dean needs a bigger paycheck than Bobby's garage can give him. Luckily, he knows a guy.

This is the original summary but it unfortunately gives little idea of what Carry On is actually about; basically, from a “fandom history” stand point, Carry On (written in 2013) created the BDSM genre for the Destiel fandom. While of course it wasn’t the first Destiel BDSM fic, and far from the only one even at the time it was published, it was such a major work in terms of popularity, and so well known and widely read that, especially in 2014 and 2015, almost every BDSM story that came out bore echoes of Carry On. The basic premise is: Dean needs money for Sam’s tuition, and so he decides to become a sub-for-hire, and is hired by Cas. Sound familiar? Well, Carry On did it first. (don’t take this as a judgement call or a statement on the quality of Carry On or any of the works that came after).

(Archivist’s Note: don’t expect me to write quite so much about every story, but unlike the vast majority of the fics in the Archive, I actually read Carry On, when it was still up on AO3, and so I can speak a little more than usual to it’s backstory and plot.)

Set Me Up, Buttercup (Teen+). 30,071 words. No Archive Warnings Apply.

Dean is the starting setter for his college's volleyball team. His plans for the year include winning Conferences, passing his classes, kicking Benny's butt at basketball, and making sure Ash remembers to eat and bathe on a semi-regular basis. He doesn't plan on meeting Cas Milton but once he does, Dean's carefully planned year changes.  

TamrynEradani’sentry to the 2013 Dean/Cas Bing Bang is a college AU with art by crimsonswirls.

Time of My Life (Teen+). 35,940 words. No Archive Warnings Apply.

Dean Winchester is an ice dancer who is scrambling to find a new partner after his couldn't skate with him anymore. Castiel is an ice dancer who can't seem to keep a partner. They're each other's last chance but can they also be each other's best chance?

It’s been years since I read this but irc, Time of My Life isn’t a Cutting Edge AU - TamrynEradani had never seen the movie, I think is in one of their author’s notes - but if you’ve seen the movie you’d never guess that. As the summary makes clear it’s not a precise overlap, but there’s definite commonalities.

The Dean Smith ‘Verse (Explicit). 6 stories, 28,483 words. No Archive Warnings Apply.

Dean Smith is a man of routine. Castiel takes him apart.

Another BDSM AU; Dean Smith becomes the sub for Cas. As a side note, the verse includes a threesome with Benny, but is most definitely primarily a Destiel AU.

This Crooked Fish, co-written with clotpoleofthelord (Explicit). 3 stories, 52,249 words.

With the first Lady Knight in centuries, a tournament and Progress to honor a Royal Marriage, and the Crown Prince falling in love with the King of the Rogues, it's certainly not going to be a boring year in the kingdom of Tortall.

Written with Tamryneradani, who is no longer on the internet.

Note that This Crooked Fish is still available on AO3.

Interested in any of these or other works by TamrynEradani? There is a publicly accessible list of their most popular works, with links to download them, that can be found here. (the archive also reblogged this post earlier this week)

Or, click on the read more below to see a list of which TamrynEradani fics are available in the Archive, and which we’re still looking for!

Warning: While I am willing to distribute what I have - please contact me by DM for more information - if I hear anything from the author or their representative asking me not to distribute these fics I will cease to do so. Thank you for understanding!

Fics by TamrynEradani currently in the Destiel Fic Archive:

A Glimpse of the World

A Lesson in Communication

An Empty Heart and a Full Clip 1: An Empty Heart and a Full Clip

An Empty Heart and a Full Clip 2: Graduation Party

Baking Season

Beloved

Both Sides Now

Carry On 1: Carry On

Carry On 2: Five Times Sam and Cas Met

Dean Smith Verse 1: Delayed Gratification

Dean Smith Verse 2: Who I Am When I'm With You

Dean Smith Verse 3: Positive Reinforcement

Dean Smith Verse 4: Work It

Dean Smith Verse 5: Weekend Getaway

Dean Smith Verse 6: Caught in Between

Don't Stop Believing

Employee of the Month

Games We Play

Get Out Alive

He Prayed to You Every Night

Heavenly Delights

Here in Your Arms

Hero

His Mother's Son

I Can Haz Kittenz

I'm Sorry

If You Rock the Boat, You're Gonna Get Splashed

Inside Your Heaven

Like a Human

Morning Sunshine

Mornings Like These

Most Obnoxious Angel in the Garrison 1: Paging the Righteous Man

Most Obnoxious Angel in the Garrison 2: Baked Lays and Nail Polish

My Morning Light

Never Enough

No Place Like Home

Now I See

Part of the Family

Patchwork Project

Peace of Mind

Rest for the Weary

Set Me Up, Buttercup

Softly Spoken, Softly Received

Take Us Home

Teacher Dean 1: New Students and New Beginnings

Teacher Dean 2: Tea Parties and Burritos

Teenage Rebellion

The Auction

The Dean Winchester Guide to Dating 1: Consent and Intent

The Dean Winchester Guide to Dating 2: Flowers are a Must

The Life of a Hunter

The Monster Within

Time of My Life

To Boldly Go

Unusual Combinations

Welcome to the Dork Side

What's in a Name

Whisper My Confessions to the Dark

Work It

Fics I Do Not Have Copies Of - IF YOU HAVE COPIES AND ARE WILLING TO SHARE THEM WITH ME, PLEASE CONTACT ME!

A Lifetime Special

Angels We Have Heard on High

Deck the Halls

Drive-In

Get Off My Beach

I Put Myself in Your Hands

My Pretty Boy

Speak Now

Tinfoil Dinners

Note: if you know of or have a copy of a TamrynEradani work that is on neither of the two lists just above, that means I don’t know said story even exists, and even if you don’t have a copy I’d appreciate if you could tell me the work title so I can try to find it. I do my best to be thorough, but tracking down full work lists for deleted authors is an imperfect art at best, and can be nigh-impossible at worst. Thank you!

[chemicalarospec]

A Look At Dan’s Recent Branding

AKA I Make Up a Bunch of Stuff About Media and Perception and Promotion and Branding and Say the Same Things Over and Over

I’m so sorry this is actually horrendously long. I’m a loquacious a$$hole.

So I started rambling in the tags of this post began thinking about Dan’s  presence recently. The reason so many of us fell for the red chairing was because it actually seemed possible -- perhaps not a proper joint video, but a cameo or side role.

Now that the video’s out, I can see it has very strong Solo Phil vibes, but I can still imagine a few different ways Dan could have been in it if he wanted to be. (Side note: It also feels like a run-of-the-mill, everyday, video, though seasonal, and not a festive special, despite the content. idk, I blame it on the lack of decoration and boring grey wall. cue clowning for more spoopy content though.) Dan is not in the video, so he must not have wanted to be in it. Why? 

Before I talk more, let’s just talk about “branding” for a bit. I use it interchangeably with “image”/”public image”/”public persona”/”common connotations”/”associations” here (kinda wrongly), but I default to “branding” because it’s what the phandom (possibly even Dan and Phil themselves?) use the most frequently -- “image” is perhaps the best-fitting term. Regardless, in a very general example, if Stephen King wrote a fluffy teenage romance book, it would be “off-brand” for him. That’s what we’re talking about here. Except with Dan and smaller differences.

It’s also worth noting that Dan and Phil were not always Dan-and-Phil -- I remember seeing an early liveshow clip where Dan says they’re not a double act. I’m pretty sure the radio show in 2013/early 2014 followed by the launch of the gaming channel in 2014 is when they became a “double act” --  the BBC absolutely billed them as such. 

You can see what I’m getting at here: Dan is trying to drop the “and Phil” in a softer way than he dropped the “isnotonfire” back in 2017. However, it’s definitely worth noting that he had already distanced himself quite a bit from it before the official name change, with first the shorter fringe and then the curls being a visual representation of that. And it’s probably just a mental thing on my part, but curly Dan now looks different from curly Dan-with-Phil.

Okay so first, why is he trying to change his image? Like his first evolution, a major component is being more mature -- llamas and malteasers didn’t simply not represent Dan anymore, they represented a younger, less mature Dan. He didn’t like it anymore. Does Dan not like who we view him as now? My first instinct is “no,” because his current connotations are fairly empty, but I don’t really know, so I’ll just move on.

What do we associate with Dan right now? i. e. what’s “on brand” for him? Well, again, there’s not a lot of strong specifics, at least for me. After two years for being nearly absent from the internet and very clearly growing a lot as a person, Daniel hasn’t talked enough for there to be only the basics left: tall, British, memes, and gay.

Okay, but the gay. Dan and Phil have been out for one year, but being part of The Gays is a pretty big part of their branding. This is because of their already long-standing reputation, more specifically their attachments to the community -- all those teenage girls turning out to be lesbians and, of course, the shipping.

The Gay is also an answer to the next question: What different aspects of his image is he pushing? Again, that he’s more mature and serious -- the UN talk, for example. I’m not counting the book here because that’s the product of the changes, not content being used to create a shift.

The big thing I want to focus on is the attitude video series. I’m very curious as to how this came about to be and don’t know enough details to say some things, but one thing I can note is that the plug for You Will Get Through This Night is a really small part of it. It’s literally the last thing he says, and they don’t even show the cover. It’s so skippable, and while it’s good that means they all really care about the important content of the series, it does create some questions.

To be honest, all of the attitude/This Night content is kind of strange to me. For example, the quote they used to promote it doesn’t mention the book, which just looks bad. This Night isn’t really the center of the collab -- it’s more general mental health awareness and activism.

So that’s the first thing Dan’s trying to put into his image. The podcast (Get Britain Talking or something like that) is, I feel, more directly part of marketing This Night, though of course, like with the video series, the content itself is emphasized and important and I should treat it as such.

Back to attitude. attitude is “the UK’s best selling gay magazine.” Why is Dan trying to build connotations to things he already is? No, but actually this gives insight on how he’s trying to be perceived: he’s a confident gay man. This magazine with its connotations (formal media, queer, well-established) will come up should someone new search up Dan -- obviously that’s not the direct reason; it’s a representation of his public image. 

Why is he trying to create this image? Right now, us in the phandom are probably 90% of the people tuned into Daniel’s actions. We’ve already built up a lot about him, and though we don’t want to admit it, we do like Dan-and-Phil, the double act. Overall, I do think Dan will not change our image of him as much as he’d like, but he has changed it more than we might think -- for example, people talking about how “mature” and “grown-up” he is in new photos. 

I think I’m just stupid, but these pushes don’t seem to be needed for You Will Get Through This Night. Okay so the problem here is “how do you get people to buy a book?” An author’s broader public persona doesn’t really impact this. I’m not going to hear about a mental health book written by an ex-Youtuber and search up the author. I’m not going to hear about a mental health book written by an ex-Youtuber in my normal book searching, period.

You know where I could see myself finding out about a book like this, and what would get people to buy the book? Doing mainstream interviews specifically about it; I’ll read TIME interviews with anyone, so long as it seems mildly interesting. But Dan’s not doing that, not a lot, not yet. (I bet he will later.)

I guess what I’m saying is the attitude video series is periphery media that impacts his branding but does not reach a large audience; it’s impact is atmospheric, not promotional.

(Dude it’s 10:30 at this point I’m not sure what I’m saying.) (also I rearranged these paragraphs sorry if it reads poorly)

Dan is a private person. He has made this extensively clear throughout the years and in the most recent content. What this means is I don’t believe he wants to update his branding just for the sake of accuracy to self.

So it’s (partially) for something else, but the public framing clearly goes beyond This Night. The obvious answer is that Dan’s just trying to return to the public eye, but then I still ask why???

The attitude series is not an end goal -- i. e. it is a building block for something. I mean, I just don’t think Dan’s like “yeah I want to create content again and this is the content I want to create,” simply because it started out seeming like an extension of the interview and now it’s clearly more than that, but it’s still like, for the magazine. It’s not his.

So what’s Dan going to do with this status of being a queer content creater and mental health advocate he’s curating? So remember how there’s a 99% chance he’s doing something w/ television but there’s been no official announcement? Yeah, that. 

I had a few paragraphs talking about book-adjacent media (interviews, reviews, ect.) vs television-adjacent media but all of it was me 100% making stuff up so it’s gone now. Basically, I *think* if he were to make a show, fiction or non-fiction, people would search him up and write a small description of him, and I *think* this is less likely for You Will Get Through This Night, so I *think* this reputation-building is in preparation of the former, not the latter.

Isabelle, you spent over an hour on this, do you actually have anything interesting to say?

Freaking *waves hands* promotional-- social dynamics-- what the heck actually is branding at this point-- Dan show.

TL;DR: It might just be the French in me (or just *my* French relatives?), but life is manipulation and Dan is trying to drop “and Phil” from his name and is manipulating his public image to be more mature, with a focus on being one of The Gays and a mental health advocate. Because it’s not vibin’ as This Night promotion/set-up, it is likely setup for promotion for another project, probably the TV one.

TL;DR 2: Just read the tags on the original post I literally didn’t have to say any of this except for “television theory”.

[ohblushes]

spare bower snippet for us to read over and over instead of die of anticipation/fear for the election?

i hope a preview of the next chapter works!! it’s the kind of night where we all need every ounce of distraction we can get, i’m watching a beer and drinking a fluffy movie and it’s definitely helping more than the alternative, phew

-

Fuck. He has to tell Jonny.

It's four in the morning and Patrick can't sleep. He should be sleeping. He has been sleeping, a lot, but sometimes he goes through spells like this. It's worse now than it's ever been except maybe the period right before his draft, and now's the time he most needs his sleep. The baby needs him to sleep. Patrick has to take care of his baby. 

He finally lets himself crawl out of bed and flip on a light. His bedroom isn't exactly cavernous, but the little pool of light produced by the lamp beside his armchair makes it seem bigger and emptier than it is, so Patrick puts Independence Day on and starts cleaning.

Cleaning isn't the right word. He makes circuits of the room, stops to sort through a drawer, straightens a lampshade, picks up a picture frame and puts it down again. Notices that his picture ledges are getting dusty, and goes to retrieve a rag from the closet to wipe it down. 

There's a lot of history here. Him and Erica holding with a baby Jackie between them while Jess made bunny ears behind their heads, his grandpa at the drive-in where he'd worked as a teenager, a pack of Patrick's Buffalo friends on a basketball court, Sharpy and Abby on either side of Patrick at some brewery Abby had wanted to try. They're always dragging him along as their third wheel; Abby jokes about it sometimes, and Sharpy gives away what a sap he is by reassuring Patrick that Patrick's never the third wheel. He and Abby always end up trading fondly incredulous looks behind Sharpy's back. Patrick had tried turning down the invitations for a while, but Abby kept asking, and that even more than Sharpy's needling had made Patrick start saying yes again. 

The empty frame he'd picked up at the drug store the other day is on the top ledge, right in the middle. He has a vague idea that that's where his first sonogram picture is going to go, but then it hits him that he's not just going to have one picture of his baby, he's going to have lots of pictures of his baby. Fuck. He's going to need more picture frames. He's going to need more space.

He ends up taking all of the pictures off the top ledge other than the empty frame, and in the process of trying to cram them all on the bottom ledge he gets frustrated and piles everything on the ground. It makes dusting the ledge easier, at least. When he's done, he sits down cross-legged on the floor in the middle of his piles and starts sorting.

Some of these he doesn't feel a need to display anymore. He's fallen out of touch with most of the guys from Buffalo, although he does set a picture of his favorite cousin in the stack of stuff to keep, and he probably doesn't need as many pictures of the team as he has. The one unframed photo he displays is stuck between the 2013 and 2015 cup wins; when he reaches it, he picks it up carefully, tries not to look at it, and ends up pouring over it anyway.

It's the only picture of Jonny he allows himself. He shouldn't let himself have even this much, but it serves as a reminder to be more careful, and he makes himself keep it tucked off to the side in a place of no particular importance. What he really wants to do is put it next to the empty frame. He won't. He can't. What would Jonny think if he saw - ?

Stupid. Jonny's never going to see it. Patrick finally drags his eyes away. He should crumple the fucking thing up and throw it in the trash, but the thought of treating any picture of Jonny that callously makes him want to cry, and only mostly because all he does anymore is sleep and cry and watch movies. Sometimes he does two of those at a time. He hasn't managed all three yet, but pregnancy is opening so many new doors that it may very well happen tomorrow.

Patrick's never felt this lost in his life. He's always had something to work towards - one thing to work towards, that came packaged with an entire lifetime of subgoals. Now there's simultaneously a new priority and zero plan for navigating it. What he really needs to do is stop hanging out with Jonny. No, what he really needs to do is tell Jonny the truth. He just has to figure out how.

One thought that keeps occurring to him is to contact a lawyer and have custody paperwork already. Jonny seems so… so startlingly excited about Patrick having a baby, and Patrick's always known Jonny should be a dad. Maybe he'll want the baby. Maybe Patrick should initiate a legal agreement to show Jonny that Jonny can be involved if he wants. As much as he wants. That he can be involved with the baby but not involved with Patrick. He'd ultimately concluded that that wouldn't be a good idea, though, or at least telling Jonny about the paperwork wouldn't be; the last thing Patrick wants is to pressure Jonny, or trap him. There's already a very real risk that Jonny's going to throw himself into being a parent to Patrick's baby just because he thinks it's the right thing to do rather than out of any real desire. So that's a consideration.

And on top of all the other shit, he doesn't even have hockey to fall back on.

The baby's not shit, though. He tries to reassure it as often as he can; it's a good thing he's been spending most of his time alone, because he's taken to talking to his kid the way Jess talks to her cats - the way Jonny talks to his new dog, which is the most fucking hilarious and dorky and endearing sight Patrick has seen in maybe his entire life. 

When he's finished sorting his photos, the top ledge is still almost empty, and the bottom has been curated into some semblance of order. He stacks the rest on his dresser to deal with in the morning, or the afternoon, or whenever he feels like it. "We're definitely going to have to get more picture frames," he tells his baby. "Someday I'm going to embarrass you with how many pictures I have up here. And you'll actually get to see them, too. I've never had anyone else in this room before, you know. Although technically you already are in the room, aren't you?" Patrick pats his abs. "These conversations are going to get a lot more interesting once you can talk back."

[fymonsta-x]

[ADMIN] Final notes

Hello, this is FY!MX admin.

For the last couple of days, I’ve been going back and forth in my head trying to decide on whether to keep this blog or not. So I’ve re-read all of your messages and it dawned on me that this blog is somehow important to some of you; and given it’s also my one source of positive influence regarding MONSTA X, I decided on keeping it, rather than just closing it, despite how suffocating Wonho’s absence has been imposing in my life.

However, I would like to share a few notes concerning the sum of events that took place up until today. In advance, I would like to share that I’m a lawbebe and that possibly due to that fact, I’m brutally realistic with this kind of things, so I hope you can understand why I’m about to state the following notes. I hope no one will get hurt by my words, but most of all, I hope no one will get hurt hoping for things that will hardly happen again at all.

Regarding Starship’s announcement (Nov 4) on finally taking legal action, I hope you can understand the first half refers to events that took place back in July; the other half refers to Shownu. I’m saying this because I’ve seen fans reading into the statement thinking it refers to Wonho as well. I’m not entirely sure that’s a possibility — and you don’t have to agree with me — given Wonho is no longer part of Starship’s legal sphere (he doesn’t have a contract with them anymore), so realistically, they have no obligation whatsoever in protecting him, as they also weren’t interested in protecting him prior to terminating his contract. I know Starship staff continues to send mixed signals, but no matter how much the staff loved Wonho, the final word is always up to the upper, powerful members of the company. The entire situation is more complex and delicate than it seems.

Trust me when I tell you you won’t see legal results in a while. It won’t happen next week, nor next month, I doubt it will happen this year. Courts are universally perceived by commoners as a place to solve the littlest quarrels, so they are often drowned in meaningless cases that take up most of their time. Naturally, you will get tired of waiting for results, but I can assure you they will come at some point.

Whereas I don’t condemn fans fighting for Wonho, I hope you keep in mind that Wonho is gone and it would be very difficult for him to join MONSTA X without dragging them to his negative media attention. At this very point, people literally care more about what Wonho did as a teenager than the fact JDE is close friends with a Burning Sun MD. If anything, you should be fighting for his right to see justice regarding the defamatory attacks he saw fall on him without any sort of legal defence. I want to remind you that we still don’t know the facts of the alleged debt, even though in no way should a debt dictate the end of your entire career.

The personal grudge that followed resulted in the revelation to the media that an apparent police investigation is taking place, regarding the alleged purchase and use of marijuana by Wonho in 2013, without Starship knowing (possibly not even Wonho, as he is yet to be summoned). Because the statute of limitations regarding that alleged crime goes up to seven years (there’s one year left), if the results turn out to be positive or if the police collects any other source of proof, Wonho might be looking at a real sentence that could throw him in jail, as marijuana use is a very serious crime in Korea (yes, even if it was six years ago). I do condemn Starship for throwing Wonho under the bus without the results being revealed or the investigation going forward as of now, but I can reason with the fact that they might have thought of the worst scenario in advance, advised by their legal team, following the myriad of other accusations Wonho was involved in.

On that note, I also want to clarify that the juvenile detention rumour turned out to be false, as I’ve seen plenty of people ignoring Dispatch’s report regarding that matter. Dispatch oh so kindly uncovered Wonho’s past for us, directly contradicting JDE: “The leader of the theft was sent to a juvenile detention centre, while Wonho was given probation”. If Wonho got probation, that means he was never in juvenile detention, as a probation exists precisely to replace the latter sentence.

Finally, I want to remind you not to engage with hateful comments or posts, as hate thrives and succeeds based on attention. When I say don’t engage I mean:

🚫 Don’t reply/comment

🚫 Don’t share/repost/retweet/quote retweet

✅ Simply report and block.

Shownu’s rumour has been receiving so much attention it could possibly dictate the end of MONSTA X with the same strength Wonho’s marijuana rumour would if he were still part of the group. For that, I want to applaud Monbebe for trying so hard to keep his name out of the online search engines, eventually succeeding. You truly are doing amazing and I hope your focus will remain on protecting MONSTA X, as I don’t think this is the end just yet.

I.M knows what we’re up to and he supports all of us. He sent us a little message in the best way he knows: through music. MONSTA X are watching us, they are on our side, and that’s why I could never give up on them.

EDIT:

I am basing my opinion that Wonho’s contract has been terminated on this article, that mentions Starship’s reply to Wonho’s marijuana use accusations, and them not knowing about the ongoing investigation as a justification to terminate his contract, possibly over the violation of his contract legal clauses.

This is no longer about a debt (hardly ever was) or his juvenile detention fake rumour, it now involves serious criminal accusations, as Wonho can still respond for a crime he allegedly committed six years ago, since the Korean law allows so during the period of seven years (2013-2020). The suspicious timing to bring up this alleged crime is no coincidence at all.

In no way did I write this post to shatter people’s hope. In fact, I clarified one of the rumours based on contradictory reports. I wrote the post to remind you what’s at stake for MONSTA X and Wonho right now, and why the possibility of Wonho coming back is slim: he is being investigated for an alleged crime and will be for the next year, as the police seems to have nothing better to do than to take two criminals as their proof statements regarding an alleged six-year-old crime.

All my opinions are based on what I gathered from media articles, so you should take it as a grain of salt about this entire matter. No one knows what really happened between Starship and Wonho, except for themselves.

I will resume regular posting as always, starting now. If you wish to see FY!MX posting regarding any current situation, message us or me personally, I’ll make sure to help in the best way I can and make your concern visible. Love,

✨

[orangeoctopi7]

Stupid Teen Emotions

@forduary Week three is travel/trapped. In this story, Stan and Ford TRAVEL back to the past, where they become TRAPPED! It fits!

Chapter 1:  Back in My Day

They didn’t sleep well, that first night. Ford stayed up late, because of course he would have stayed up into the wee hours of the night working on his perpetual motion machine in the original timeline. But he barely touched the project. With the knowledge he had now, he could probably build the whole thing tonight, but that would, of course, be changing the timeline. A younger Ford had learned a lot, working so hard and so long on this machine, and future Ford didn’t want to deprive his past self of that important lesson. So instead, he began writing, racking his brain for anything he could remember of January, 1969.

Stan tried to sleep at first, but he just couldn't. He was too anxious and excited, all rolled into one. So he instead dug out a few of his old comic books that never got thrown away.

They both must have fallen asleep at some point, because come morning, there was a rapping at the door that woke them both with a start.

“Get up, you two! You’re gonna be late for school!” A woman with a thick Jersey accent yelled through the door.

“M-mom?” Ford’s head lifted blearily off his desk.

“Wow, you are really taking the whole ‘stick to the timeline’ thing seriously.” Stan mused from his bottom bunk.

“I didn’t mean to fall asleep at my desk…” Ford groaned.

“You never do, Sixer, you never do.”

They marched downstairs and into the kitchen, where their mother had a breakfast of hot cinnamon and apple oatmeal waiting for them. Stan was so happy to see her, he ran over and hugged her, pecking a swift kiss on her cheek.

"Aww, sweetie!" She planted a kiss on his forehead. "I'm still not paying your parking ticket." She added flatly.

"What parking ticket?" Stan asked, confused. "Oh, um, I mean, drat."

Ford was too tired to even work up the energy to be happy to see his mother. As he sat down, he automatically reached for the coffee pot. But a rolled up newspaper smacked his hand away.

“What d’you think you’re doin’?” Caryn asked, eyebrow raised.

“... getting my morning coffee?” Ford answered, addled.

“How many times do I have to tell you, honey? No coffee ‘til you’re 18. It’ll stunt your growth!”

Ford looked like he was about to have a fit.

“Wait, are we not 18?” Stan asked quickly. Luckily, his parents ignored his out-of-place comment.

“Ya don’t need coffee, ya need more sleep!” Filbrick grunted from behind his newspaper.

“You both drink ten cups a day!” Ford argued, his voice cracking again.

“That’s cuz we’re adults.” Filbrick growled, “Once you’re old an’ decrepit, you can drink all the coffee ya want.”

“Trust me, he will.” Stan said flatly.

Ford kicked him under the table. Hard. Stan cried out.

“Can it, you two!” Caryn scolded them, “You’ll wake up Shermie. I don’t wanna have to deal with three crying babies.”

The brothers finished their breakfast sullenly but quietly, and grabbed their backpacks before heading out the door.

“Think we should leave Shermie a note warning him to watch out for time travelers?” Stan asked as he fished out his keys to the STNLYMBL. “Y’know, for when he’s older?”

“Then Dipper and Mabel will be born later than 2000.” Ford reminded him irritably.

“Right.” Stan smacked himself. “Man, this sucks! Why time travel if we can’t make things better?”

Ford’s only reply was a surly sigh as he turned to the cafe next door.

“Hey, where’re you goin’?” Stan asked.

“To get some coffee!”

“Seriously, Sixer? Hot Belgian Waffles is next door, Mrs. DuBios will rat you out to Ma for sure!”

Ford heaved an even more enraged sigh that bordered on a growl, and turned on his heal to get into Stan’s car, slamming the door shut.

“Whoa, easy, we’ll just stop by the donut place on the boardwalk.” Stan reassured him as he started the car. “What’s gotten into you?”

The scientist groaned and pulled his fingers through his curly brown hair. “I don’t know! Normally it’s simple to just focus on my intellect and control my emotions, but it just isn’t working now for some reason!”

“‘Control’ your emotions, or bottle them up?” Stan muttered. Ford shot him a withering glare. “Shoot, I wasn’t supposed to say that out loud. Why do I keep doin’ that?”

“And the only reason I’m so mad in the first place is because I’m so tired!” Ford continued to rant, “I got at least four hours of sleep last night, it doesn’t make any sense!”

“Heh, guess teen Ford isn’t used to old man Ford’s space-sleep schedule. Or lack of sleep schedule, anyway.”

Ford’s face brightened into his ‘a-ha!’ expression. “Stanley, that’s it!”

“What?” 

“The reason I’m having such a hard time regulating my emotions, and the reason you can’t keep your mouth shut even more than usual! We may still have our minds from 2013, but our bodies are teenagers in the middle of puberty. Our hormone levels are magnitudes higher than what we’ve become accustomed to.”

“Great. Goin’ through puberty again. Just what everyone wants outta time travel.”

They pulled up to the donut shop on the boardwalk. Stan poked around in his seat and found a quarter, which he handed to Ford. Suddenly, his brother looked unsure.

“Stan, maybe you should hang onto this. You’re going to need all the money you can get, come summer.”

“It’s a freaking quarter, Poindexter.”

“Yeah, but a quarter is worth a lot more in 1969 than it will be in 2013! This is almost a whole gallon of gas!”

Stan pinched the bridge of his nose. “Ten minutes ago you were about to have a meltdown because you couldn't get your morning coffee, just buy it, Ford!”

“Fine, but I’ll pay for it myself.”

“With what money, genius? You didn’t have a job in high school because you were too busy with your academic science nerd stuff! Now go buy yourself a cup of coffee, or I’ll make you walk the rest of the way to school.”

Ford frowned, but took the quarter. He couldn’t help but feel guilty as he got his cup of coffee. How could he or anyone else have ever said that Stan was the lazy one, when Stan was the only one who’d ever had a ‘real’ job? Even to this day, Ford had never had what anyone would call a normal job, barring that one summer he’d been a lifeguard at a waterpark in a dolphin-dominant dimension. He’d always relied on scholarships and grants and accademia, which was hard work, in its own way, but still.  It certainly wasn’t what his father would have called a real job. While traveling across dimensions, he’d relied on trading information and knowledge, building and selling inventions, and even, occasionally, stealing.

Stan was the one who’d gotten a minimum wage, part-time job selling popsicles on the beach. Stan was the one who’d entered local semi-pro boxing matches and brought home winnings. Stan was the one who’d saved up for his own car. 

“Ar-are you crying!?” Stan exclaimed when Ford climbed back into the car, cup of coffee in hand.  Ford reached up to wipe his eyes, surprised as his brother to find tears there.

“Oh geez, Stanford, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be so harsh, I just--” Stan began to babble.

“N-no, it’s not you.” Ford found his voice wavering as soon as he tried to speak. “It’s just-- gah, I’m so stupid! Stupid hormonal chemical imbalance!”

Ford tried to keep himself from crying anymore by taking a big gulp of coffee. It wasn’t very good, and it was just this side of warm, but it instantly improved his mood.

“Ah, there’s that good dopamine.”

“Better?”

“Much. Let’s go. I think we’re already late.”

Despite the fact that they were ten minutes late, there were still several students milling about when they arrived at the school. The twins felt like they should stick out like a sore thumb, but nobody paid them any mind. 

“Ugh, never thought I’d come back here.” Stan grumbled.

“Well, look on the bright side!” Ford reassured him, “Now that you’ve studied quantum physics and run your own business for thirty years, Math and Science classes should be a breeze!”

“Hey, yeah! I can’t wait to see the look on Mr. Grauberger’s face when I can tell him exactly how much interest $300 will accumulate over 20 years!” But he paused. “Wait, what about changin’ the timeline? Pretty sure I never answered questions in class.”

“Oh, it wouldn’t make that much of a difference.” Ford scoffed. “Even if you get 100% on every quiz while we’re here, I don’t think it’d be enough to bring your grade up past a C, and you’ll be dropping out before graduation anyway.”

“Oh yeah….” Stan’s good mood quickly washed away.

Ford rested a comforting hand on his shoulder. “We know it all works out in the end.”

“Yeah…” Stan agreed, “but there was still a lot of heartache gettin’ there.”

[purplesurveys]

1120

[created by: vyvyan86]

What do you do for work? I work at a public relations agency, so I handle servicing for a good number of clients across different industries. PR is basically like the extroverted sibling of journalism; and since I turned out to not enjoy journ, I gave PR a try halfway through my time in college and ended up liking it more.

What would you ideally like to do for work? I actually really enjoy what I do, like getting to work directly with big local and even international brands. I’m glad I made the decision to make the career shift because I can’t imagine how miserable I would be in a newsroom.

What are you doing in order to achieve this? I’m already where I want to be, at least for now. I don’t see it changing any time soon because I’m nowhere near tired of the work yet.

What is the meaning of your life? What is it that you really live for? Erm I don’t really try to define it or have an answer to this right away because I feel like it puts a lot of unwanted pressure on me, by me. As long as I’m satisfied in the present, I shouldn’t be worrying for whom or what my life is ultimately supposed to be.

Have you ever REALLY thought what it means to have children? Yup. Having kids would be the perfect life, but realistically speaking I am not at all ready to start that particular chapter. I don’t make enough money to be able to build a family, and I’ve never even tried changing a diaper yet...then you have to think about weekly formulas, what school to enroll them in, building a nursery...it’s all very hectic and stressful and it’s definitely not a priority as of the moment.

Are you planning to have children anyway? It would be nice, but I still don’t know if it’s in my future.

What is the most awful thing about the world today? I doooooooooon’t understand racism. It’s those videos of white people being caught on tape harassing POCs without a care in the world that get to me the most. It’s horrifying and it’s made me have close to zero plans to travel to the places where the videos usually come from. It’s happened too many times and too many clips have gone viral, that I can’t help but think it would happen to me and my family as well. What do you think is the worst being on the planet? Abusive and/or neglectful parents.

Have you ever been arrested? If so, what for? Nopes.

Have you ever been in court? If so, in which role? Definitely not.

Which do you think is a more valuable being, a human or an animal? I don’t think it’s fair to compare. A life is a life.

What, in your opinion, will cause the end of the world? I’m gonna let science answer this and refer to whatever predictions they have for the future based on their calculations. 

What does your mother do for work? She works in an international hotel chain as an executive secretary, but work is actually kind of slippery for her at the moment because of Covid. There are only certain days in the week where she’s called in to report for work, and there is a chance those requests will stop coming in at a certain point.

^If she's a homemaker, any specific reason for this? She’s not anymore but she did enjoy a brief period of being a homemaker after resigning from her previous workplace back in likeeeee 2013 I’d say? which according to her had increasingly turned into a toxic environment after 20+ years of working there.

What about your father? What does he do? He is an executive sous chef. Cruise ship industry, so his situation is also actually quite bleak. Fortunately the job security with his company is a lot stronger and more guaranteed.

How do you like your coffee? I like it sweet and for its color to be light brown.

If you're of age, what's your favorite alcoholic drink? Tequila shots if we’re going hard. Long Island Iced Tea or Zombie if I’m looking to have a chill session with friends. Red Horse is fine as well, whatever. I hate beer with a passion but I’d drink it if everyone in the table is having a bottle.

If you're under-aged, what is your favorite soft drink? Bold of you to assume all minors like soda hahaha. I don’t, though.

Do you smoke? Yeah, just super seldom though because I don’t want to form a habit. I had the opportunity to last Friday but voluntarily skipped out on it, but that was also because I already had a vape pen on me.

^If so, did you start when you were 18 or were you younger? My first cigarette was when I was 21. Start of 2020.

Did your parents approve of your smoking/alcohol use before you turned 18? They wouldn’t have approved of it at all. And I wouldn’t have let myself either.

Do you have siblings? If not, skip the next few questions. Yeup.

Are you eldest, in the middle or youngest? I’m the eldest of two siblings.

How big an age gap is between you and your siblings? With my sister, 2 years. With my brother, 5 years.

Do/did your siblings cause trouble? Not at all, actually. We were all well-behaved, aka the three of us were always too shy to do anything bad or mischevious. I guess the biggest issues with each of us were - I was very messy with my stuff and ignored all my homework; Nina was a crybaby and would get into tears over literally any inconvenience; and my brother was a violent crybaby, which means he is Nina but always ready to punch you in the face, kick you in the neck or stomach, scream into your ear, etc.

If your siblings are old enough, what do they do for work? My sister is taking up digital filmmaking in an art school; my brother is only in his junior year of high school.

Have you ever been jealous of your siblings? I’m not jealous of her, but Nina is amazing at art and drawing and painting and all that stuff and I always wish I shared even like 1/98th of her skills, hahah.

Do you still live with your parent/s or do you live alone/with a partner? I live with my family, yeah. I’m nowhere near ready to start being on my own.

What do you think about growing up? Like what Paramore said (heheh), has to happen sometimes.

What about having responsibilities? I don’t really think anything of them? They’re kind of expected.

Do you know how to cook? Nope.

^If so, what's your favorite thing to cook? I don’t know how to make anything yet, but some dishes I would love to be able to master are risotto and paella. I’d also love to inherit my grandma’s kare-kare recipe but I’m already 300% sure from this early that I’ll never be able to make it as good as she does.

What about baking? I also can’t bake but some stuff I’d want to learn how to make are cupcakes, macarons, cheesecake, and a chocolate chip cookie recipe so good that my kids would literally bring their friends over to our house just to make them try it.

Do you ever drink tea? Iced tea for the most part. If I do ever drink the traditional hot tea, it’s usually because it’s served either at a hotel I’m staying at, or at an Asian restaurant.

Have you ever followed any of these fad diets that go around? I don’t follow a diet. I’m usually open to trying out foods that are packaged to fall under a certain diet, though – paleo, keto, etc. - just to experience how much different it could possibly taste from the food I typically have.

What do you usually order at your favorite restaurant? I usually get rosu, a type of tonkatsu cut that has a lining of fat on its side. My favorite restaurant then provides unlimited rice, miso soup, and cabbage with my order.

Do you prefer a proper restaurant to a fast food place? Not necessarily. I love a lot of either.

What's your dream vehicle? A Mini Countryman.

What about your dream house? I don’t have an exact image of it yet, but I always said that my dream house, wherever and whatever it might be, must have a room for all the wrestling memorabilia I plan to collect in the future. It’ll be like a ~mancave~  as I also plan to have a couch and a big TV in it so I can watch documentaries and pay-per-views there.

What is the biggest dream of your life? Right now, I would say the ‘biggest’ - since I’ve established it since I was a kid - is to go to the 50th installment of Wrestlemania, which is like the Superbowl of wrestling. This year it’ll be the 37th, so I have 13 years left to plan the dream out and save up and stuff.

If you could travel to another country right now, where would you go? Morocco.

What is a country you'd never ever visit? There isn’t a country I wouldn’t want to visit at least once. I’d probably avoid the ones that have dangerous political situations or are literally at war at the moment, but it doesn’t mean I don’t ever want to step foot in them.

Are you good at taking care of your finances? I’m getting there! I was able to have a good amount of savings this month :) My finances were shit for the first two months of my job because there was immediately soooooooo much to pay for, but I’m glad everything is on track now.

Have you ever had any trouble paying your bills? Well no, because I don’t pay my own yet. I do hand a portion of my allowance to my parents every payday so that I can help out with the family bills, though.

What about your rent? We don’t have rent.

What do you think is the best thing about being an adult? The freedom that comes with it is very empowering. I don’t technically have to ask permission to go out with friends anymore, or be scared of a curfew (but my mom still imposes one, LOL. It’ll mellow it within time though, I’m sure); I make my own money and can spend it however way I want while the rest I can save; I can take a drive or book an entire trip altogether as long as I can afford it...it’s letting me get to know myself even more, in a way that college and my teenage years weren’t able to do.

What about the worst? Being expected to have my shit together when I’m very clueless still about so many things in life. I make fuckups at work at least once a week and I always feel like I’m going to get fired with every mistake, lol.

Is there a person in your life, who wastes their life somehow? Hmm, I don’t think so. I have an uncle who had seemed to be headed nowhere before, but I think he’s slowly getting back on track. I think. At least I don’t hear anything about him anymore.

^If so, how are they wasting their life? Never had a stable job, was a neglectful husband and father (I think he still is), was never able to secure a house and even a car for his family, and deals with his problems by drinking...and worse, drunk-driving, sometimes. It’s an embarrassment and I don’t care if my grandma tells me off for giving him the cold shoulder every family gathering. I’m not gonna get close to someone who negatively affects my mood and my energy.

What is something you need to do, but you keep postponing it? Getting a new pair of glasses. Booking an appointment is a Newly-Unlocked Adult Thing that I’ve never done yet, so I’m nervous and I keep putting it off, hahaha.

Do you think life should just hand things to you? Not at all.

Or should you earn the things you want and need with hard work? Yeah, there you go.

Would you rather live off government benefits or earn your own money? Earn on my own, as much as possible. But some balance would be nice as well so that I can start feeling as if the government is actually helping and serving me.

When you take a survey, do you skip questions? Typically, no. But some of the older ones I’ve seen made by, like, 15 year olds of the time will have nonsense, downright immature, or lowkey racist/homophobic questions that I will have no problem deleting altogether as I think no one here would have any interest in answering them either.

Why, do you think, people write lyrics as the title for a survey? To be creative and catchy, I guess. And it works - I do tend to click on surveys that use lyrics.

If you have a Facebook, what do you use it for? Look for things to share, mainly. I’m fully back on it now after going a way for a bit to do some healing on my own.

If you have a Twitter, what do you use it for? As a space to let out literally all my thoughts and brianfarts. No one cares on Twitter, so it’s the perfect space to make a mess and be a mess.

If you have a Tumblr, what do you use it for? I used to have a wrestling-themed Tumblr (and before that, many more other themed Tumblrs), but when my interest died down I soon switched to using Tumblr for my surveys and being more lowkey altogether on here.

If you have an iPhone, why? I find it easier to use, and I like the interface more. The camera’s features are also more to my liking.

If you have an iPad, why? We have a really old model of it, and we bought that because iPads were all the rage at the time. It had been the newest concept from Apple and most people felt they had to have one, including my family. We definitely don’t feel the need to get another tablet anytime soon since it just functions like a giant phone for the most part.

If you have the latest electronic gadgets, did you pay for them yourself? I’ve never paid for a gadget before.

Do you always put your litter in a trashcan? Of course. I know how to pick up after myself like a respectful human. < Yup.

When you walk/ride your bike/drive your car, are you careful? Yeah, unless I’m mad. Sometimes road rage will take over me tbh, especially if other people on the road have been stupid for quite some time.

What is the rudest thing a person could do or say to you? Something phobic after seeing Jess and I together. < This reminds me of when my ex and I used to get stares or whispers in public. But to be honest, I actually enjoyed those encounters because it only served as fuel for me to get even more affectionate and piss them off more, lol. Good times. 

Anyway, the rudest thing I can think of at the moment is being cut while in line. Some people do it so subtly too, and their shy, careful shuffle to get in front of me is what irritates me the most because THEY KNOW they’re doing something shitty and yet are being so sneaky about it.

Have you ever been that rude to someone else? I have never cut in line, never will.

Do you think your parents are proud of you and what you do with your life? I don’t know. I hope so. I don’t know if they’re expecting me to move out at this point, but I hope they’re at least proud of the fact that their first kid managed to land a job, especially considering we’re living in Covid times.

Which would you rather be, famous or a "nobody"? Why? Can’t I be somewhere in between? When it boils down to it, I’d probably go with being a nobody...I’d miss the socialization and having friends, but at least it means I can get away with more.

Do you need to have the latest fashion in clothes and accessories? It would be nice, but I’m not desperate to have them.

If you have a job, do you get along with your co-workers? Yeah, I’d say so. I definitely have never fought with anyone yet. It’s hard to gauge my relationship with each of them because I entered the workplace while we’re under WFH so I’ve only gotten to talk to most of them through Viber; but so far, so good.

What kind of hobbies do you have? I like traveling and learning, so anything that’s got to do with those - going to museums, visiting ancestral houses, trying local art forms - I would definitely dive into. But if I’m not in a new province or country altogether, I like trying out new food and new restaurants, embroidering, watching my favorite shows, coloring, painting, and reading essays about history. :)

Would anything in the whole world make you give up any of those hobbies? I’m not super attached to painting anymore, so I guess.

Have you had/do you have any pets? I currently have two dogs. In the past we’ve had a cat, a rabbit, two birds, and several goldfish.

Do you even like animals? I love them, except insects.

If you aren't already, would you ever get married? It would be a nice thing to tick off my life event list.

If you are already married, what was the ultimate reason for the marriage? -

As a child, did you do anything really bad? I was raised in a highly violent household with the worst influences as my elders. Yes, I managed to squeeze in some horrible stuff when no one was looking.

^If so, what was it? What were the consequences? I was violent towards my brother but won’t get into it. The only thing I’ll mention is that I used to chase him around with a knife whenever he’d start becoming too much of a headache.

As a teenager, did you do anything really bad? I don’t think so. I was well-traumatized and abused by the time I was a teenager so I was afraid of fucking anything up and being in more trouble.

^If so, what was it? What were the consequences? The worst thing I did was lie about my performance in school, honestly. Which, looking back now, doesn’t even seem like a big deal considering I was only in high school then and grades from there barely matter.

Do you have a problem with authority? Nope. Well, a good number of my teachers didn’t seem to like me for some reason. I’d say it’s their problem though since I never did anything to raise hell in school, ever.

What's your favorite comic strip? I don’t have one.

Is there a piece of clothing you absolutely must wear every day Underwear... < Yep.

Has a doctor ever told you to lose weight? No. I’ve always been on the lighter side so that has never been a comment given to me by anyone.

Have you ever been diagnosed with a lifelong disease? Isn’t scoliosis a lifelong thing? If it is, then yes I have been.

What is something you absolutely hate? Fruits.

What about something you absolutely love? Seafood! Which is why I have spicy tuna salad and dynamite rolls with me at the moment :)

[brandtmax]

welcome back to gallagher academy, soo-yun ‘maxine’ brandt ! according to their records, they’re a first year, specializing in research & development; and they did not go to a spy prep high school. when i see them walking around in the halls, i usually see a flash of ( sugar-free mints, a messy low bun, wisps of hair alongside her face, the end of a pen between her teeth, the patek philippe calatrava 4897r-010 in rose gold, off-white pants in every fabric ). when it’s the ( virgo ) ’s birthday on 08/23/1997, they always request their japchae from the school’s chefs. looks like they’re well on their way to graduation. 

henlo it me again i hope u guys aren’t sick of me yet bc i have a new bby named max! i’ve written a lot™️ so brace urself but it’s worth it ( i think ) + trigger warnings: death and alcohol dependency under the cut xxx

the basics

full name: soo-yun ‘ maxine ’ brandt

nicknames: max — just max

age: twenty-two years old

birthday: august 23rd, 1997

gender: cis female

preferred pronouns: she / her

sexuality: bisexual

major: research & development (  formerly a b.a. political science degree from yale university )

known languages: english ( native ) / german ( native ) / korean ( native )

background

nationality: american

birthplace: new haven, connecticut, new hampshire

current location: gallagher academy, roseville, virginia

financial status: upper class

religion: non-theistic

appearance

eye color: brown

hair color: black

height: 5′8.5″

notable features: curly hair on lazy days, rosy cheeks

usual mood and expression: calm, furrowed eyebrows whenever her eyes are on work; lethargic and irritable when she’s overworked ( or without alcohol )

family

birth order: second born

parents: soon-bok ‘ vivian ’ jang and stephen brandt ( d. 2018 )

siblings: min-jun ‘ parker ’ brandt ( b. 1995 ) & georgia ‘ gigi ’ brandt ( b. 2001 )

significant others: chris harmon ( 2013-2015 ) / ava carrillo ( 2015-2016 )

her story so far (this is so long n serious lol)

soo-yun 'maxine' brandt was born and raised in new haven, connecticut, to jang soon-bok ( vivian ), a surgeon, and stephen brandt, a ( n allegedly shady ) criminal justice lawyer.

the brandt siblings were raised like any other blue-blooded, very strict but loving household ( strict = mom / loving = dad )

brandt house rules: get straight a’s, follow the 12 am curfew and don't bring anyone home that you know you’d get disowned for. follow those three rules, and you can do whatever you want.

there was pressure for the brandt siblings to be academically accomplished, but it wasn't anything they couldn't handle. they were well-tutored, semi-popular, attractive teenagers, which were common in new haven, and everyone knew they were destined for ivy league.

in high school, she dated chris harmon, and it was the kind of relationship that could only be described as the personification of a kinder egg. sweet on the outside, a waste of time and money on the inside.

which is fine; it took max about 2 months to get over it when they broke up halfway through senior year, because neither of them thought of their relationship going far. the joy of getting into yale ( already expected ) trumped the feeling of losing a boyfriend. she even bet parker $5,000 she'd get early admission. she won.

during college, she had an on-off relationship with ava carrillo for a year, which inevitably became a permanent off. it turned out that it wasn't a good idea to throw herself into a committed relationship the minute she stepped foot into yale. max never had the time, and ava didn't have the patience. at least she tried it tho !

things seemed to be on the up and up for their family, and the worst thing max has ever been through is being awake for 24 straight hours to prepare for a final presentation. but ! you know what they say about the calm before the storm.

( tw: death ) on december 18, 2018, their father unexpectedly passed away from a heart attack during a layover flight in new york. the brandt family was at home when they heard the news. needless to say, they had a quiet christmas and new year.

the family tried to move on as best they could, but the siblings knew their dad's death irreversibly changed their mom. they have a rocky relationship to begin with, the siblings always feeling like vivian never wanted to become a parent and only did so for their father. they have absolutely no mother-children bond, and it got worse when stephen died. being the older brother, parker took it upon himself to take care of vivian, balancing that with running the home stretch with his undergrad degree.

on the other hand, maxine still had a few years left at yale. no amount of therapy helped her cope with the loss of her father, the way her mother seemed to become a shell of herself, how parker had to break the momentum of his career to be there for their mom, and the constant pressure to do good academically.

( tw: alcohol dependency ) it started with buying bottled moscow mules because she didn't like how beer tasted, and she wasn't dumb enough to go straight to hard liquor. just one to take the edge off whenever stacks of coursework became too much, or when her mother would send her an email talking about her day, and she didn't have the courage to read it. then it went from a one, two, three-time thing to a whenever-i'm-upset thing, which slid into a whenever-i-feel-like-it thing. after a while, it became a daylight thing where she would add a splash of soju ( or whatever ) to her lunchtime drinks, and she genuinely thought it was just a funny idea at first. max wasn't the only day drinker in her social group, anyway. she found it acceptable, no different than how other people would pound red bull every 6 hours like it's their life force. it was manageable for her since she was able to schedule when she'd be indisposed, and she still can.

parker had ( and still has ) no clue. despite the two being close, max spared him the burden of having another thing to worry about. as long as she can control it ( or she thinks she can ) then nobody had anything to worry about.

eventually, both maxine and parker were offered the opportunity to join gallagher academy, with parker in line to graduate with honors in global affairs and maxine, not far behind with her own impressive academic portfolio in political science.

though really, her acceptance into gallagher has less to do with her published papers ( still impressive, tho ) and more to do with her covertly helping her father win cases by doing some expert sleuthing, strategizing, witness dispatching + discrediting, sexc breaking and entering, and good, old-fashioned manipulation !

it was something they both wanted; to be a part of the bigger picture in the world, but they knew they couldn't leave their mother alone. parker, who chose to make the sacrifice, let maxine go and stayed behind to take care of vivian.

( but if we’re honest, maxine would’ve left for gallagher regardless if parker was coming with her, but she’ll never tell him that )

despite the guilt and telling parker she wasn't going anywhere ( cough ), he insisted on her taking the once-in-a-lifetime chance to be a part of something they never knew existed. he knew they were going to end up resenting each other if they both stayed. at least one person in the family should be doing something that made them happy.

and so max dropped out of yale and left for roseville, even though she hadn't thoroughly planned out her career trajectory.

she’s eager not just because of the school, obviously. she can't handle going back to their childhood home and seeing how hollow everything is. plus, the immense anger and denial she feels over her dad’s untimely death has no place in new haven anymore.

she promised parker she'd make it up to him, though. somehow, someday.

who is this b*nch

max is relatively easy to get along with, tbh !

she’s a mood matcher; meaning if you’re nice to her, then she’s nice to you ( and if you’re gonna be a punk bitch, then she’ll be a punk bitch right back )

she’s a lil spoiled, lil sheltered, and lil ignorant but her general friendliness makes up for it, she’s the type to be friends with ( almost ) everyone

internally: perfectionist to the point of being ruthless, first place is the only acceptable place, meticulous, neurotic, workaholic, overachiever, if you’re not useful then what’s your purpose?, slightly egotistical, etc etc

externally: caring, protective, and supportive mom friend who just wants people to get their shit together because inadequacy is unacceptable, fixer, likes to dip into different social circles, consciously makes the effort to be more patient with people

she’s incredibly ambitious ? morally ambiguous ? slightly self-serving and self-involved ? her father’s a criminal “justice” lawyer whose clientele doesn’t exactly consist of the beacons of society so... she learned a lot of lessons about how you can win any case in the courtroom if you’re smart enough to a ) make a good story, b ) get the fitting evidence by any means necessary, c ) discredit and discard the necessary people, and d ) be charming and persuasive enough to rock the jury

she’s actively trying to be more open-minded and assimilate to a diverse group of people because back in yale she was definitely in a wasp bubble, and admittedly there are times where she will come off as super snobby without meaning to and tbh sorry about it

she’s still an extremely sociable person because yale also taught her how to network like a motherfucker, and how it’s important to know / be friends with everyone

honestly, intense people turn her off ( both positive and negative ) a little because she can't handle concentrated personalities in one sitting

even though she’s a little intense herself sometimes but it’s fine, we love hypocrites in this house !

neat freak ? but honestly who doesn’t like a friend who squeegees the shower every day and has a tiny can of lysol in their bag and an aroma diffuser with three ( 3 ) oil blends

she’s like... weirdly aggressive sometimes and most definitely has anger issues ( still in denial over her father unexpectedly passing away and getting stuck with a mom who doesn’t like her own children very much )

but also, she’s just agro in general and has a number of physical hobbies. she’s an ice skater, equestrian, a soulcyclist, and a kickboxer. she can fite.

she’s not the type to make fun of herself because she's not at a point where she sees qualities in her that are okay to laugh at ( unless you’re tight )

keeps her negative juju to herself because she’s a very private person

will prioritize work over play because she'd hardwired like that, but that doesn't mean she's anti-fun ( clearly )

definitely needs to loosen up a little that doesn't involve alcohol... jenga perhaps ? or actually try therapy again ?

very effectively sneaky about her growing alcohol dependency ( sugar-free breath mints, brushes her teeth + uses mouthwash after every meal )

dry sense of humor

at all times: wears a 1-carat, emerald cut, pavé diamond ring ( family heirloom ) + carries her trusty black hydro flask with her ( 24 oz. ) and no one is allowed to drink from it !

her signature scent is le labo bergamote 22 🤍

hmu on my discord @ tin#0697 for plottage !