#we set ourselves up for heartache but we wouldn’t have it any other way

[irisbleufic]

Oh no. Not this, not now. You are the last word-bound world I needed to wake from dreaming. Why do I even bother trying to shrug off the quicksilver jolt, the scorching down my spine. You lost too much in the years I turned away; you know all it takes is showing me the cost.

I’ll try my best to tell it in glimpses, in snatches. It will not be the same. I was dying when I gave you that last labored push, all my nights as I spiraled into the sickness, that weary, pain-spiked haze.

(But there’s a catch, isn’t there. I lived.)

[the-insomniac-emporium]

Serenade (Daniela Dimitrescu/Reader) Pt. 7

Fandom: Resident Evil: Village Rating: T for language Warnings: None? I think? Please let me know if I missed something Notes: This is incredibly dialogue heavy, and I actually don't feel as confident about this chapter as some of the past ones? Hopefully y'all like it, I mean at least the ending is cute (or cheesy, depending on who you ask). PS: Not sure how many chapters there will be in total, other than at least 3 more (one of which ill, in fact, get a little h*rny again. actually, h*rnier). Past Chapters: Pt. 1: Nocturne, Pt. 2: Overture, Pt. 3: Accelerando, Pt. 4: Toccata, Pt. 5: Poco a Poco, Pt. 6: Elegy

Chapter 7: Harmony

“We need to talk, yeah?” Daniela asked, nearly stuttering, a sort of nervous that you had never seen her exhibit before. The first thing you think is that she’s really, really cute when she doesn’t know what to do. After that you actually process what she said. Relief floods your chest, followed by warmth, and you make a mental note to thank Bela the next time you see her. In the meantime, you were unable to contain your happiness. Out of instinct you move closer to Daniela, smiling softly, quietly reaching one of your hands towards hers. There’s no hesitance in her response. Instead of taking your hand she pulls you in for a hug, opting to rest her chin against your shoulder. Admittedly you’re a little surprised, but you return the motion nonetheless. “Oh, little songbird…”

Heart racing, you softly press against Daniela, turning your head so that you could place a single, brief kiss against her exposed collarbone. For a moment the two of you just stay like that, holding each other close. When you pull away, remembering that you still hadn’t said anything, you find that Daniela is blushing from the neck up. In turn, the sight makes you blush. You can’t help but reach out and run your fingers through her hair. Though you can’t see yourself, you know your eyes are filled with affection.

“I love when you look at me like this,” Daniela whispered, not entirely meaning to voice her thoughts. Then you’re blushing harder, smile small but sweet. “Mmm, you’re just darling, aren’t you?”

“Not nearly as much as yourself, my Lady. To be in your company is to be the luckiest soul in the world. I cannot even begin to describe the feelings of which you inspire in me,” you replied, trying not to stumble over your words, barely able to process any thoughts other than ‘pretty lady likes me ahh’. Thankfully, you still remembered a few tricks from language arts class. Who knew studying the classics could make you more romantic? At least one English teacher, probably. “I’ll have plenty of time to try, though… after we talk about things, that is. Is there somewhere private we can talk? I’m not terribly eager for your mother to overhear.”

“Are you sure we can’t talk about how much you like me for a while longer?” Daniela asked, faking a pout. When you perk a brow at her antics, she shifts a little, forcing herself to be a little more serious (at least for the time being). “If you insist, my sweet thing. I’d suggest my room-” she winks at you- “but I doubt we’d stay talking for long, would we? Maybe the library? Neither of my sisters tend to go there around this time of day, and I can hardly remember the last time mother went there.”

“Well, no one from the day shift is scheduled to organize things until later this week, so… sounds like a date to me,” you chimed, enjoying the way that Daniela’s face lit up in response. “There’s just one thing I have to take care of first. Wouldn’t want my roommates to think something has happened to me, now would we?” With that said you linked your arm with your partner’s, setting off towards the servants quarters.

—————————————–

“Oh thank goodness, we were starting to get worried!” Daphne exclaimed as you quietly ducked into your room. For a second you freeze in place, hoping to whatever higher powers may be that she hadn’t seen Daniela behind you. Certainly the vampire would have moved out of sight?... Despite your assumption, you do see Daphne hesitate for a moment, gazing at the now closed door. Thinking quickly, you give a little wave to draw her attention elsewhere. Seemingly it works like a charm, with her attention returning to you, and so you release an internal sigh of relief. Now you just had to think of an excuse for why you’d be staying up late.

“It’s fine- I’m fine, really. Just had to carry something for one of the Ladies,” you lied, trying not to be specific enough to possibly contradict facts you weren’t aware of. “I, uh, kinda have to go back out, though? There are some piano books I need to find before tomorrow morning. I’ve already found a few, but apparently there’s at least one that goes over some technical practice songs, and I think D-” you almost wince, but lean into it, stuttering instead- “th-think that Lady Daniela would enjoy the variety. Not sure how long it’ll take me to find the books, so don’t stay up waiting for me. I promise I’ll still get enough sleep to function tomorrow.”

“So the lessons haven’t been canceled? That’s good to hear,” Daphne said, nodding slowly. The words catch you off guard, and you tilt your head to the side in confusion. Noticing your expression, your roommate is quick to explain. “After whatever happened yesterday… we weren’t sure if we’d ever hear you play again. Not that we know what happened, just that Lady Daniela was, well, upset, and you stopped playing sooner than usual. But I suppose if the lessons were canceled completely… I doubt Lady Dimitrescu would let you go that easily, huh?”

Again, you shift awkwardly, wondering how Daniela must feel hearing all of this. But just like that Daphne shakes her head, clearing her thoughts, and gives a little shrug.

“Don’t stay up too late, okay? I know you already promised, but we both know you’ll lose track of time if you aren’t careful. If you aren’t in bed by the time the sun reaches its peak, I swear we are gonna have words!” Both of you laugh before Daphne waves you off with a smile. Still, you wait to open the door until she (and the other maidens) has her back to you. Better safe than sorry, right?

—————————————–

Somehow the room felt different in a million ways, now that you were here with Daniela. There was something about the way she moved, freely, eyes and fingers running down the spines of familiar books. Even if you had not seen it before, it felt like the library was overflowing with magic. What I would give, you think, to see the whole world tinted in shades of her. Again you find yourself blushing as you followed Daniela towards a small sitting area. One of the chairs is practically a recliner, with plenty of space, and you realize what she has planned mere moments before she acts.

Next thing you know, you’re being pulled closer to her, practically lifted into the air. Then you’re falling back, right on top of a giggling Daniela. By the time you’ve regained your senses, you’re in her lap, held just tight enough to keep you from getting up. She’s watching your face closely, smirking with pure satisfaction.

“Are we going to be able to talk like this?” You asked, a little unsure yourself, already distracted by the soft curve of her jawline. Even as you speak you’re eying her, imagining what it would feel like to trail kisses along her skin until she was restless… Thankfully she responds before your mind gets too carried away.

“Of course we are, little songbird. Probably. If you behave,” Daniela teased, gently playing with your hair as she did. You can’t help but laugh when she suggests that you are the one who needs to control yourself. “Alright, alright, I get your point. I just… I think that it’s easier for me to, fuck, I don’t know. Relax? It’s easier for me to relax like this, holding you, getting to kiss that lovely neck of yours-” she pauses to demonstrate- “and that means I won’t freak out like last time. Or so goes my thought process, anyway.”

“In that case…” You’re sitting perpendicular to her now, still holding on tight. One hand cups her cheek, gently caressing the skin, before you lean in for a kiss. The two of you enjoy yourselves for a minute, glad to have this time together, more glad to be reassured of each other’s affection. To think that you wouldn’t even be able to meet her gaze if not for Bela’s intervention… Eventually you pull back, knowing that you did need to talk. “I care about you, firefly, and I want things between us to be real, and healthy, but I…”

The words died in your throat, a lump you couldn’t quite swallow, when memories sprung up like weeds in your brain. Communication mattered to you for a thousand reasons, and you weren’t blind to the irony of one of those reasons making you freeze up.

“I haven’t… done this before, not for real,” Daniela replied, mistaking your paues for uncertainty. “Apparently being an immortal, blood-drinking princess is only attractive in the realm of fiction. Maidens only ever seemed interested in a fleeting rush, or a fraction of a chance at an escape. They didn’t care for romance.” Now her tone gets bitter, and her eyebrows furrow. You can see her shoulders tense up, raising a little, making you try to snap out of your own thoughts for a few moments. By the time she speaks again, you’ve started to gently rub her back. “Maybe I should have paid more attention to my novels. How often does the monster actually get a happy ending?” She says the words with a hollow laugh. Still, she’s relaxed a little under your touch, even leaning into it.

“You’ve… done some bad things. Hurt a lot of people, and I can’t pretend that doesn’t scare me,” you started to say, ignoring the heartache you feel when you see Daniela’s hurt expression. “But you’re more than that. You’re soft, cute, and mischievous. More than that… I can tell that you want something beautiful. We can have that, we can make that, for ourselves, with our own hands and our own desires. But we can’t use stories as a blueprint. We can’t rely on what we’ve read, not when everything the two of us do is brand new. Not when-” you close your eyes, fighting back tears, glimpsing fragments of your last relationship- “not when I’ve already been hurt by my own misconceptions. The things we read aren’t always real, or right, or anything like what we need. What we deserve.”

“Something tells me you’re holding back a little,” Daniela murmured, barely able to get the words out. It almost looks like she’s close to crying, but her cheeks are dry, and her voice is steady. “But you’re right. What we have is better than anyone could write, anyway. You’re my little songbird, and I’m not letting you go anytime soon. Even if I have to figure out this whole ‘communication’ thing. I suppose that means I should… come clean. About a few things.” There’s a clear hesitance to her voice, like she’s embarrassed, and she’s speaking slower than usual. A blush rises to her cheeks before she takes a deep breath.

“We don’t have to talk about everything right now, if you aren’t ready. We’ve already made good progress, I think, even if half of it might be because of your sisters. Well, sister, singular. Cassandra throwing me into that wall really didn’t help anyone. Except maybe the chiropractor I will inevitably need to see,” you joked, remembering your earlier conversation with Bela.

“Hold up for a fucking second, Cassandra did what? I’m going to replace all her paint brushes with stained carpet strips, and that’s if she apologizes. Nobody fucks with my baby,” Daniela snapped, expression as serious as can be. Normally you found her anger to be terrifying. Now that she was directing it at someone else? And on your behalf?... Maybe it was a tiny bit cute. Which you tried to show, by gently bringing her in for another kiss. Of course, Daniela isn’t quite as gentle, instead kissing you hard, holding you as closely as she can. There’s a bit of possessiveness in her grip, and it makes you tense up. But as soon as you do she’s pulling back, breathing hard, eyes weighed down with concern.

“Y’know, I think she was just mad that I made you cry. And if I found out someone made you cry, I would be pretty angry. Not that I’d throw someone, partially because I don’t think I could, but still. It’s… almost cute how much your sisters care about you. Almost, just not quite,” you said, eager to draw the attention away from your reaction. Like you had told Daniela, it was okay if you weren’t ready to talk about everything. “Speaking of that, I can’t believe I haven’t apologized yet. I panicked so much, I didn’t even realize I was yelling until you picked me up. No matter how frustrated I was, I shouldn’t have-”

“Don’t, please,” Daniela interrupted, eyes closing for a moment. “I can’t believe you’re apologizing. I pinned you to the wall, and not for the usual reason!” There’s a bit of panic in her expression, and you get the feeling that she’s beating herself up inside about it. Which, based on what you had thought about what you had done, was understandable.

“Consider this: We both fucked up, and we’ve both acknowledged it now, so we could just… not talk about our regrets? At least for now,” you countered, glad to see Daniela relax and nod in response. Leaning in, you shift to rest your head against her shoulder, wanting to enjoy her proximity more. “Hey… if I’m your songbird, and you’re my firefly… are we, I don’t know… officially a couple now?”

“I was under the impression that we already were,” Daniela said, clearly a little confused. While you technically agreed with her… there was another part of you that wanted to have a little fun.

“You never asked, and I know I never did either, so…” Now you’re looking up at her, smile wide, heart beating faster than normal. “Lady Daniela, firefly of house Dimitrescu, lover of romance novels, player of pianos, keeper of my heart… Will you do me the honor of allowing me to court you? To be yours, officially, in the pursuit of affection and happiness like the village- nay, the world- has never before seen? Will you be my girlfriend?”

“How’s this for an answer, songbird?” Daniela cooed. Then she was lifting your chin from her shoulder, turning her head and bringing you closer. Your lips touch, as gentle as can be. It’s a short kiss, but one radiating with love, that ends with your foreheads pressed against each other. In this moment, you feel like you could stay in her arms for the rest of eternity. “Yes. Absolutely yes, obviously, a thousand times. I could never say no to you, especially not now, with your eyes so desperate for the sight of me, and your lips so begging to be kissed. Now, how about we celebrate, hmm?”

Just as Daphne had predicted, you end up staying awake far too late, but you were all the happier for it.

[makeste]

A theory I have seen is that Fuyumi wants the family back so desperately, because she and Toya experienced the better Endeavor, where everything was alright. My guess is that after his decent into abuse its stopped being like a normal family and Natsuo and Shoto never experienced a normal family. But that is just a therory

okay so speaking as someone who grew up with an abusive and neglectful parent (though in my case it was my mom rather than my dad)... it’s complicated. there are a lot of emotions there. I think one of the things Horikoshi has really excelled at with the whole Todoroki plot is the way that he’s used the four siblings to show the different ways that children respond to parental abuse. and I can say from personal experience that all of them are valid. not just the bitterness, anger, and resentment that Touya, Natsuo, and Shouto have all shown at times, but also that intense (but tentative, almost wishful-thinking) longing to just have a normal family that we see from Fuyumi. speaking again from experience, that last one isn’t an outlier at all. in fact, in my case, I’d say that was honestly the strongest feeling out of all of them, and it even fueled a lot of the other three emotions. btw just a heads up I’m gonna delve into some personal stuff here briefly, so yeah. I won’t put details, but if anyone wants an abuse trigger warning added to the post or anything like that, just let me know.

so the thing is, even during my angriest times, if some magic wish-granting genie had poofed in and told the child me, “��sup, I’m here to solve all of your family problems, just tell me what you want me to do,” I wouldn’t have wanted them to take my mom away and lock her up somewhere and make her suffer or anything like that. honestly, even during the worst of it, the thing I wanted more than anything else was just to have a normal family. my mom had a lot of untreated mental health issues, and it was basically a situation where you never knew which version of her you were going to get on any given day. so there were times when she was a kind and loving mother who took care of me and my siblings. and there were a great many more times when she was temperamental and erratic, and we all (my dad included) basically just walked on eggshells around her and did our best to lay low and try not to bother her because even little things might set her off, and we never knew how she was going to react. and my dad worked a lot, and my sibs and I were homeschooled for reasons which I’m not gonna get into because this post is already veering off on too many tangents, but anyway so the short of it is that my sibs and I grew up in this unstable environment and ended up more or less raising ourselves. and I resented my mom a lot for that, growing up, and I still do honestly.

now a lot’s happened since then, and she’s gotten some help, and my siblings and I are all adults now and we’re more or less good, even though we all took a certain amount of Psychic Damage along the way and we’re each still dealing with that. and we each have different relationships with our mom now, and a couple of my sibs are even fairly close to her. but for my part, I pretty much have no relationship with her at all outside of seeing her a few times a year at family get-togethers and the like. the thing is, even though my mom did eventually (after a LOT of false starts and struggles and heartache) get some help, she’s never really shown remorse for what my siblings and I went through because of her. she’s never taken responsibility for any of it. she blames a lot of other people, and will go on long rants about all of the terrible things that have happened to her and all of the horrible ways people have treated her (some of which is true, and some of which very much is not). but there’s never even the slightest acknowledgement of any of the things she herself has done to hurt others. she either passes the blame or just pretends it never happened. 

and honestly, it sucks. even now, there’s little to no real desire to change on her part. she’s gotten therapy and meds now, and so emotionally she’s much more stable than when we were kids, but one of the unfortunate results is that it’s all the more clear now that a lot of her behavior never had anything to do with her mental illness at all. she just didn’t care at all about how she was hurting others; or at the very least, didn’t care to face it. and that’s just how it is.

anyway, so I’m sorry to keep breaking away and telling you guys my own life story lol. but the point I’m trying to get at here is that I actually relate to Fuyumi so much, though. what I wanted more than anything was for my mom to care, and to say she was sorry, and for me to be able to believe that and to trust her, and for her to actually change. that was it.

and so for me, here’s the biggest difference between the Endeavor situation, and my own and so many others. the difference is that unlike people in real life, we know Endeavor is actually remorseful for what he’s done. we know it for certain because we’ve seen it for ourselves, from his own point of view. the manga actually lets us get inside his head and shows us that he really is sincere, that he really is sorry, and that he really is trying to change. and that’s something that’s impossible to get in real life. that certainty that the person really means it, that they’re genuinely remorseful and committed to making amends.

and for me, that’s fucking wish fulfillment right there. for the abusive parent to finally realize the error of their ways and be sorry and try to do right by their kids. I fucking wanted that. hell, I still want it, even though I’ve made my peace with things the way that they are. that chance to somehow heal the broken relationship, and have your parent genuinely try their best to be a real parent to you, even if it’s years after the fact? shit. I’d take that in a heartbeat.

and so when it comes to Fuyumi and her attempts to get her family to reconcile and experience a few normal things, I f feel that. I really do. because when you’re growing up in that type of situation, normal is all that you want. and I don’t think it’s anything that requires an explanation on her part, because it’s not actually an unusual reaction at all. it’s natural. it’s the most natural thing in the world. honestly it’s annoying that fandom sometimes tries to shame her for having those feelings. like honestly, fuck that. because the thing is, I’d wager that almost every kid who grew up with an abusive parent has at some time or other felt the exact same way.

and that includes Touya, Natsuo, and Shouto as well. literally the only difference between them and Fuyumi is that they feel that Endeavor’s change of heart is simply coming too late. it’s not that they don’t want their family back, just like she does; it’s that from their point of view, it’s something they can’t get back. for Fuyumi, that dream of having a normal family is something she’s still seeking. for Natsuo and Touya, that dream of having a normal family is something that was destroyed. something that Endeavor killed. something they’re in mourning of. and so Touya wants revenge for it, and Natsuo is trying to pick himself up and move past it. and meanwhile Shouto is caught somewhere in the middle of all of those reactions, because he’s still trying to decide whether or not he can ever bring himself to trust his father again. he’s somewhere in between his brothers’ mourning and his sister’s hopefulness. sort of a Schrodinger type of deal lol.

but anyway, the point I’m trying to make here is that all four siblings are really experiencing the same thing, just in different ways. Fuyu may be the one arranging family dinners and the like, but that same longing to be part of a normal family is at the core of Natsuo, Shouto, and even Touya’s behavior as well. Natsuo’s hurt and resentment, and Touya’s spite and bitterness, come from being denied the thing they want. and Fuyu’s shaky attempts at reconciliation come from her desire to still obtain it somehow. but at the end of the day they’re the exact same feelings. and they all come from the same place.

anyways, hopefully that makes some kind of sense. basically, everyone is valid. Fuyu is valid, Natsu and Shouto are valid, and Touya is murdery which isn’t cool, but his feelings are still valid too nonetheless. hugs and therapy for the Todoroki children in 2021, Horikoshi. please and thank you.

[sokkascroptop]

traitor. (sokka x f!reader) pt 5

part 1 | part 4 | part 6

A/N: Y/N finally meets the gaang; on a side note, I am really proud of this chapter ❤️

She caught it just a moment before it smacked her in the chest. Her reflexes were delayed from her sleepiness but also from the realization that her Fire Princess just had dropped to her knees and tied her boots for her. “Easy. I’m not a bender. I don’t need the sun.”

“Lo and Li have advised me that it isn’t smart to go after Zuko and Uncle with a Royal Procession.” Azula leaned in the doorway to Y/N’s room. Her hair was a black curtain around her pale face. Y/N ran her fingers through her own loose hair before replying.

“It would be less conspicuous without guards flanking us on all sides. Do you think that the two of us could do it ourselves?” She asked hesitantly, thinking back to just a day earlier when Azula said she was a liability. Y/N wasn’t even planning to fight when she agreed to come! She thought it was going to be easier, she didn’t expect Iroh to be so suspicious of them from the get go. Apparently, neither did Azula. She was so mad when they pulled her from the sea, the water was steaming off of her clothes and skin. 

Azula smiled and sat in the chair to the small, empty writing desk in the room. “I need a small, elite team.” She tapped one pointed nail on her chin. “I think it’s time to call on some old friends, don’t you think so?”

“Mai and Ty Lee?” Y/N questioned. The last time one of them was mentioned Azula set fire to the napkin she was holding at dinner and pointed a butter knife in Y/N’s direction telling her never to mention their names again. 

“Of course them.” Azula rolled her eyes and cracked her fingers. “They’re our friends, Y/N. They’ll do anything I want.” Her voice was low and even though it wasn’t meant as a threat, it sounded like one. 

Azula shut the door to Y/N’s room with a sharp click. She leaned back against her pillow and crossed her arms. This was not going to go well. 

Anytime she and the girls exchanged letters, the answer was always the same. Neither Mai or Ty Lee were planning on coming back to the palace any time soon. They never explicitly said that Azula was the reason–one could never know who was reading your letters–but Y/N could see the subtext. A taste of life outside of Capital City and outside of Azula’s influence had spoiled them. Y/N had never felt like that before, but every day, she got a little bit more understanding as to why one might want to leave. 

It was still dark out when Azula came into Y/N’s room the next morning. She tapped Y/N’s cheek with her nail. “Get up, we’re leaving soon.”

She glared at Azula from under the very warm covers. “Why so early?” 

Azula’s gold eyes flashed with humor. “It’s a long ride into town. I’ve got us a carriage.” She grabbed the blanket that Y/N was clutching and threw them off the bed, leaving her shivering. 

“Every time,” Y/N muttered as she pulled her night clothes off and her red tunic and pants on. 

“Every time what?” Azula asked. Y/N thought she could hear a smile in the other girls words but she was currently too busy looking cross-eyed at the laces of her boots to check. 

“Why are you such a morning person?” Y/N knew the answer that Azula was going to give, but it didn’t make the question any less relevant in her mind. She hated mornings. 

“More like a question as to why aren’t you?” Hands slapped Y/N’s own fumbling ones away and tied each boot deftly. Before Y/N could even utter a ‘thank you’, Azula was grabbing her sword from where it was propped in the corner and tossing it in Y/N’s direction. 

She caught it just a moment before it smacked her in the chest. Her reflexes were delayed from her sleepiness but also from the realization that her Fire Princess just had dropped to her knees and tied her boots for her. “Easy. I’m not a bender. I don’t need the sun.”

Azula had only tied the boots because she wanted to get going, Y/N decided. Probably.

“You sound like one of those Water Tribe savages. Next thing you know, you’ll be howling at the moon.” Y/N laughed with Azula no matter how awful she thought the joke was and basked in the warm that her friend gave off. She was always so much nicer in the mornings. 

The sun was just rising as they set off, probably purposeful if she knew Azula. Y/N stared out the window the whole trip. She’d never been to the Earth Kingdom before and she was so intrigued by everything she saw. There was greenery everywhere. It made her heartache for her childhood home on Ember Island. The climate was different, here it was much cooler and the wind ruffled the leaves on the trees every now and then. And Ember Island was hot and muggy year round. But she couldn’t miss the similarities of the two places. Every now and then she’d catch an animal she’d never seen before run past and she’d all but hold her head out the window to get a second look. Azula was much more regal, which was unsurprising though she wasn’t sure if Azula had ever been to the Earth Kingdom either. She sat in the seat across Y/N with her arms crossed and her feet on the bench next to Y/N. Azula had her eyes closed the whole time, reclining in a beam of sunlight coming in through the windows, but Y/N knew she wasn’t sleeping. 

She thought Azula looked much better like this; with her face softened in relaxation. No furrowing of the eyebrows or pursing of her lips. Occasionally, the wind would blow in the windows and ruffle her usually pristine hair. Y/N thought Azula glared and frowned way too much for a fourteen year old girl, Fire Princess or not. Just then Azula cracked open one of her eyes like she knew Y/N was thinking about her. But Y/N didn’t look away like she usually would have done. She just stared and smiled at her friend until Azula closed that eye again and settled further down into the seat. Y/N chose to ignore the light tap of Azula’s toe on her elbow, but not the small smile that was now on her face. 

After reaching the town it wasn’t hard to find the circus. Azula and Y/N just followed the noise and the smell. They were set up in a large field where they could have enough room to set up their tall tents and keep their platypus-bears and scorpion-lions. 

Ty Lee was in the middle of it all. 

She didn’t see them when they first approached. Y/N thought it looked like Ty Lee was flying as she flipped head over heels in the grass. She held herself in a perfectly still handstand. Y/N’s abs ached just watching. 

“Azula! Y/N!” Ty Lee rushed forward, hastily bowed, before crushing Azula in a hug. Y/N received the same tight–albeit longer–hug. “It’s so good to see you!” Ty Lee chirped. 

“I’ve missed you!” Y/N did realize how excited she was to see her old friend until she was in her arms. She smelled the same, like rose perfume and the rosin she used in her tricks. Letters were nice, but they took weeks to travel to each other. Something always happened between them, and when it was time to reply, that ‘something’ was never important anymore. 

“Don’t let us interrupt… whatever you’re doing.” Azula raised an arched eyebrow.

Ty Lee took that as permission and backflipped back into a forearm stand and began scissoring her legs in the air. She held herself on her elbows and rested her head in her hands like it was the easiest thing in the world. 

“You look like you’re having the time of your life here, Ty Lee,” Y/N said. The glow on the girls cheeks and the permanent smile on her lips was obvious. She was always bubbly, but she’d never been like this.

“What is the daughter of a nobleman doing here?” Azula asked, gesturing around to the tents and people who walked by. A hurt look erased Ty Lee’s smile, one that Azula didn’t pay attention to. She jumped right in, never caring for small talk. “I have a proposition. I’m hunting a traitor. You remember my old fuddy-duddy uncle?”

“Oh, yeah!” Ty Lee exclaimed. “He was so funny.”

“I would be honored if you would help me and join my mission.” 

Ty Lee’s feet, which moment’s ago rested on her head, slipped as she lost balance and nearly fell forward on her face. She looked to Y/N for assistance but like a coward, Y/N looked at the grass under her boots. The glance lasted half a second, maybe even less but it still made Y/N tense next to Azula as if she was caught with her hand in the bowl of unfried dough by her mother. This was between Ty Lee and Azula. Any indication that Ty Lee and Y/N had spoken since she’d left would. Be. Bad. 

“Oh, you know Azula, I would love to.” She flipped back to her feet. “But the truth is I’m really happy here. My aura has never been pinker!” Y/N smiled. Leave it to Ty Lee to lighten the mood by talking about her auras. It was incredibly smart, to make it seem like you were dumb to avoid consequences. Y/N wished she could pull that card with Azula sometimes, but she knew her too well. And Y/N knew nothing about auras. 

“Well,” Azula frowned. “I wouldn’t want you to give up the life you love to please me.” 

Y/N ground her teeth. She looked up through her lashes at Ty Lee. This was somewhere she finally fit in. Y/N knew the story with Ty Lee’s sisters and how she felt like part of a matched set. This is where she needed to be, not traveling the world with Azula on some mission that wasn’t going to do anything for her. Y/N didn’t have a choice. Ty Lee did. Don’t fall for it! Y/N wanted to scream. 

Maybe it was Agni, or maybe Ty Lee just had more self control and a self-preservation that Y/N lacked. She placed one fist against her open palm and bowed deeply. “Thank you, Azula.” 

Azula was bristling beside Y/N as they walked away. “Of course before we leave we’re going to catch your show. Aren’t we, Y/N?” Azula gripped Y/N’s arm like a vise. 

“We wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Y/N said. 

----

Y/N wasn’t sure what Azula told the ringmaster, but every seat in the tent was empty that night. 

High above their box, a square frame filled the stage. Lanterns hung around the frame, illuminating the whole tent. A tightrope spanned across it; a tightrope which Ty Lee was currently balancing on. 

“We are so pleased to have the Fire Lord’s daughter here tonight to see our humble circus. Please tell us if we can do anything to make it more enjoyable.” the ringmaster bowed and left the stage. 

“I will,” Azula muttered. Y/N furrowed her brow in Azula’s direction but she stared straight ahead like she didn’t even notice. What was she planning? Y/N wondered. 

Ty Lee was perched on a pole that rolled along the tightrope like pulley. She slowly switched from hand to hand, posing with a split in the air. Her costume glimmered under the candle-lit lanterns and her full dancer’s skirt bounced as she moved. 

“Incredible. Do you think she’ll fall?” Azula asked Y/N. 

Y/N scoffed at the question, never taking her eyes off of Ty Lee. “Of course not!”

“Then let’s make it more interesting. Ringmaster! Let’s remove the net at the bottom.”

The man’s grey eyes widened. “Remove the net? The thing is–the performers–”

Azula waved a hand. “You’re right. That’s been done. Set the net on fire.”

“Azula, don’t you think that’s a little much?” Y/N asked warily. She wasn’t sure what her friend was playing at but risking Ty Lee’s life wasn’t the answer. Y/N, however, didn’t get an answer. The ringmaster had already done what she had asked. 

For a second, just as the fire reached all the corners of the net below, Ty Lee seemed to teeter, before regaining her balance. Azula huffed, almost like she expected the other girl to fall. “Brilliant. And ringmaster, what kind of dangerous animals do you have here?”

“Azula, I don’t think–” Y/N started only to be cut off by a hand waving in her face. 

“Well, Princess, our circus boasts an assortment of exotic–”

“Release them all,” Azula smiled. 

Y/N sat in horror as she watched saber-tooth moose tigers, scorpion-lions and even an elephant-bear get released below the tight-rope. 

How Ty Lee managed to finish her act without falling was a mystery to Y/N. When she reached the opposite platform she even blew a kiss in their direction before climbing down and ceding the stage to the rest of the performers. 

Azula had only been interested in Ty Lee’s performance and ignored the rest of the performers, finding filing her nails into sharp points more interesting. Y/N wasn’t much better, her head was still spinning at what Azula had done. This was her friend. Someone who ignited such a rage in leaving her that Azula had threatened Y/N with fire if she ever mentioned her name. Was that why she did it? Was this some type of revenge for running away to the circus?

For a second she allowed her mind to think of what would have happened if Ty Lee hadn’t been such a good acrobat. What would either of them have done had she fallen into the flames? The net was in tatters, blackened and burned away. It couldn’t have held her weight from a fall that far, would have been like it wasn’t even a net at all. Plus she would have been on fire! Y/N had just watched Azula try to publicly kill her, and Y/N had just sat there and watched. 

As soon as the performance ended Azula dragged Y/N out of the tent. The air was full of black smoke from the net being burnt away and it blotted out the stars above. They made their way to Ty Lee’s tent. 

She was sitting at her vanity peeling sticky jewels off her face and wiping away layers of makeup. Y/N stared at the stain of ash that coated her gold-plated headband.

Azula leaned against the table forcing Ty Lee to look up at her. “What an exquisite performance. I can’t wait to see how you’ll top yourself tomorrow.”

Ty Lee caught Y/N’s eyes in the mirror and Y/N knew what she was going to do. 

“Unfortunately, there won’t be a show tomorrow.”

Azula widened her eyes in mock-surprise at Y/N. “Really?”

Ty Lee stood to hang her headband above the mirror. “The universe is giving me strong hints that it’s time for a career change. I want to join you on your mission.”

And that’s when it all clicked for Y/N. That net being set on fire and the animals being released wasn’t about killing Ty Lee. Sure, it would have killed her if she had fallen, but the real motive behind it all was worse. 

She could tell by the smirk on Azula’s face that she had gotten exactly what she wanted. Because during Ty Lee’s show, Azula was putting on her own. She was displaying the power she held over them. Telling them without so many words what would happen if they proved disloyal, or stepped out of line. She was in control. And suddenly, Y/N was very fearful of her friend; even as she allowed herself to be pulled into a hug. 

“Let’s go get Mai.” Azula tucked a stray hair behind Y/N’s ear and nodded at them to follow her out of the tent and back to the carriage. 

----

Azula made the carriage take them back to the ship that night. The mountain roads were too small for a carriage as large as theirs to carry them to Omashu, where Mai’s father governed and they needed to dock the ship at the city’s port. This time, Azula entered on a palanquin. Ty Lee and Y/N marched behind it as they entered the palace grounds. 

“Please tell me you’re here to kill me.” Mai bowed to Azula as they approached. She looked at Azula seriously, before smiling and laughing. 

“It’s good to see you too, Mai,” Azula confessed. 

Ty Lee rushed past both of them to hug Mai. When Y/N could tell that the hug had lasted long enough for Mai, she gently pulled Ty Lee off and replaced her. 

“I thought you ran off and joined the circus?” Mai asked Ty Lee. “You said it was your calling.”

Ty Lee smiled brightly. “Well, Azula called a little louder.” 

“And you–” Mai gripped Y/N’s bicep. “Swinging that stupid sword must be all you do. You’re built like a guard.” A comment like that coming from anyone else might have offended Y/N, but from Mai she knew what it really meant–you’re still in one piece. 

Mai was quick to join their team. Y/N knew from letters that Mai was bored with Omashu, and this was a perfect opportunity to get out from underneath her parents. 

“You guys came at the right time,” Mai said as they entered the palace. “My brother was kidnapped by the resistance last night.”

“Oh no!” Ty Lee gasped. 

“Why would they take Tom-Tom?” Y/N asked. There had to be a motive behind kidnapping a baby. Omashu might have been taken over by the Fire Nation but surely the people here wouldn’t resort to anything...murder-y just for their city back. He was just a baby! 

Mai looked back at her and Y/N noticed dark circles under her eyes she hadn’t seen before. She didn’t sleep at all last night knowing someone had her brother. “We don’t know.”

As she led the three of them to the throne room where Ukano and Michi were waiting, she caught them up on everything they needed to know. The room smelled like dust, clearly sitting unused since the governor took over the city. The three girls, as well as Mai’s parent’s knelt on pillows as Azula ascended to the throne. 

They all bowed before sitting up. Mai continued, “We’ve offered up an exchange; we sent a messenger hawk last night. We have Omashu’s King in the prison–Bumi.”

Azula turned to Ukano. “I’m so sorry to hear about your son. But really, what did you expect by just letting all the citizens leave?” She clasped her hands together and crossed her legs. Y/N noticed she didn’t look sorry at all; her face was cold, angry even. 

“Princess–” Ukano bowed his head respectfully. 

“My father has trusted you with this city, and you’re making a mess of things.” She stepped down from the throne and the girls all rose to meet her. “Mai will handle the hostage trade so you don’t have the chance to mess it up. And there is no more Omashu.” Azula growled. “I’m renaming it in honor of my father. The city of New Ozai!” She strode out of the room with all three of them on her heels. All three of them ignored the tears in Michi’s eyes.

They met on the landing of a construction project. Looking up, Y/N could see what it was. It was a giant statue of Ozai. It was mostly covered in scaffolding but Y/N still shuddered just looking at it. Though this Ozai was made of stone, the eyes were the same, cold and dead. Mai took the lead flanked to left with her and Azula, the right with Ty Lee. 

Even from a distance Y/N could tell that these weren’t members of any resistance. They were kids, probably her age, but maybe younger. Two were wearing Water Tribe blue–the boy in the middle though–was wearing yellow and orange. Y/N had never seen anyone wear those colors before. She could hear Azula hum thoughtfully next to her. 

A crane from above lowered the metal box that held former King Bumi. Y/N noticed he seemed rather chipper for being locked in a metal coffin with only his head sticking out. 

“You brought my brother?” Mai asked. Her low, raspy voice carried over the distance between them. 

“He’s here. We’re ready to trade,” The one in orange answered.

Azula turned to Mai. “I’m sorry, but a thought just occurred to me. Do you mind?”

Mai tensed. “Of course not, Princess Azula.”

“We’re trading a two-year-old for a king. A powerful, earthbending king. It just doesn’t seem like a fair trade, does it?”

Mai’s eyes narrowed, searching over every inch of Azula’s face. Her jaw tightened and slowly she turned to look back at the ‘resistance’ members. “You’re right. The deal’s off.”

Ty Lee and Y/N shared a look. What was Mai thinking? This was her brother. 

As King Bumi was once again lifted into the air, the boy in orange ran towards them, a swirling mass of dirt trailing him. Azula stepped out and threw a ball of fire at him. Or at least where he should have been. He jumped and then flew? high above them, floating on air currents with his staff that was now a glider. He was an airbender. 

“The Avatar!” Azula exclaimed. “My lucky day.” As Azula took off after the Avatar, Y/N ran to the Water Tribesmen, Ty Lee and Mai hot on her tail. She drew her sword and cut an ice dagger in half that the girl threw at her head. She ducked a rope of water and slipped past the waterbender, leaving Mai and Ty Lee to take care of her. Y/N was going to get Tom-Tom. 

The Watertribe boy was furiously blowing on a silent whistle and trying to wrangle the squirming baby in his arms. He turned and ran but tripped over a loose board and slid backwards to the edge. Y/N was nearly there, her fingers inches from grabbing the baby when something wet wrapped around her ankle like seaweed and pulled her hard in the opposite direction. She hit her chin on the wooden boards and lost her grip on her sword which skittered away helplessly over the edge and down to the ground. 

She kicked out but there was nothing for her foot to hit. The waterbender had grabbed her foot with a water rope to stop her and went back to fighting Mai and Ty Lee. She had her hands full with them, dodging chi blocks and blocking knives so she was protective of the boy–loyal to him. Her brother. Use it. A voice in Y/N’s head that sounded too much like Azula’s told her.

Y/N pushed herself to her feet, ignoring the sting of her chin and slid down the ladder just as the Water Tribe boy had done seconds earlier. 

He stood at the bottom looking to the air like he was waiting for something. He watched her come near but didn’t move. That’s when she saw her sword laying a few feet away. He saw her see it at the same time. 

They both rushed to it. Y/N grabbed the hilt but couldn’t pull away. He’d crossed his club over it holding the blade down.

 “Don’t.”

“Then I won’t.” She kicked his club away and pulled her blade back. They both backstepped giving each other space. She held her hand out to him. “ I just want the baby.” 

“Not a chance.” His bright blue eyes watched her every move. He shifted Tom-Tom on his hip.

“Please, it’s my friend’s brother. What would you do if this was your sister?”

“Don’t talk about her!” He shouted. But Y/N didn’t miss his eyes flicker to the platform. 

“I can talk to Princess Azula. I can tell her to make the deal. Bumi for Tom-Tom. Just trust me.”

“Trust you?” he echoed. Then he laughed. Y/N didn’t get to ask him what he was laughing about because she was suddenly hit with something large in the ribs and thrown under the scaffolding. She grunted as she sat up and crawled through the broken beams she was thrown through. In the sky was a flying bison.

“Damn it.” 

After climbing back up the ladder, Y/N and her friends met in the middle of the platform, Azula nowhere in sight. 

Y/N shook her head. “I’m sorry I couldn’t get Tom-Tom.”

Mai massaged a bruised wrist and shrugged. 

“But why would Azula cancel the deal?” Ty Lee asked. “We want Tom-Tom back just as much as they wanted King Bumi!”

“Azula didn’t,” Mai spat. 

Y/N sighed. “Why’d you let her do it, Mai?”

“You know why.”

“It’s not fair.” Ty Lee slung an arm around Mai’s waist. Y/N mirrored her on the other side. They walked back to the palace in silence. Nothing needed to be said, they knew what one another were thinking. 

----

“We have a third target now,” Azula announced from inside the palanquin as they marched out of the city. “We’re going after the Avatar.” 

“Ooh, I’d like to see that cute Water Tribe boy again, wouldn’t you?” Ty Lee nudged Y/N in the ribs with her pointy elbow. Y/N smiled, he was pretty cute, she thought to herself. 

Her smile grew to a grin. “Yeah, but I bet Mai’s more excited to see Zuko.” Y/N poked Mai in the arm and watched the girl who tried her hardest not to show her emotions flushed a deep red. 

Ty Lee and Y/N fell into a fit of giggles. Y/N missed her friends.

Taglist: @reclusive-chicken-nugget​ , @myexgirlfriendisthemoon​ , @astroninaaa​

A/N: if you’re getting vibes that Azula likes Y/N more than a friend, you are right ;) AND HEY we finally meet the gaang!! Y/N thinks Sokka’s cute!! Sokka hates her Fire Nation guts!! 

Like & reblog!! ❤️If you would like to be added to the taglist please shoot me a message or ask! 

[chaoticallysapphic]

the great divide part one

summary:  Who knew that eight words would be your undoing. If you had known then what you know now you wouldn’t have signed up for Suyin’s dance troupe, you probably would have left Zaofu just to be safe. But you didn’t and fate had branded you with a path that chained you to someone who would break your heart. 

a/n: so uh just a few things to note, I came up with this idea before watching the last three episodes of lok (which I feel like really show who Kuvira truly is) and it’s not a healthy relationship. Please note that no one should treat you like this, and if so either ditch them or go to therapy with them (altho I’d advise you ditch them). Also a massive thanks to @medeliadracon​ the first chapter was rough because I wrote it at like 3 am and they helped me work out the kinks by being my beta reader.

word count: 4k

“Would you mind helping me memorize the routine?” You ask one of the dancers that Suyin had pointed you to. You recently joined and unfortunately, they were already in the middle of rehearsing a routine they’d been perfecting for weeks. Usually, Suyin would help you after class but with Avatar Korra visiting she was too busy. Thankfully she had pointed out one of your fellow dancers, a woman named Kuvira. “Suyin usually helps me but she said you would probably be happy to take her place." 

Kuvira stands in shock as she stares you down, you’d just said those eight magical words that she used to dream about when she was little and you seemed to have no clue what you’d just done. You’re staring at her expectantly and as time lapses on you start to look a little nervous under her gaze. 

“It would bring me great pleasure” Kuvira replies and takes a step closer, your eyes widen in shock, a flush dusting your cheeks as she replies with your six magic words. Kuvira toys with a strand of your hair as she looks deep into your eyes. Her voice is deep and traps you like honey. “We should begin.” 

After that day, Kuvira always volunteered to help teach you after class, neither of you spoke about the elephant in the room as she’d place her hands on your body to correct your position and brush herself against you any chance she got. You’d leave every session a flustered mess who’d go home to flop onto your bed with a massive grin on your face 

In the last session before the big performance, you were dancing in sync with one another. You were each on a metal flower petal directly across from the other and were meant to be the final act. With the class, you had performed the whole thing and aced it but alone you could only practice half the routine as the ending needed other metal benders to move the petals for you. 

So instead you and Kuvira practiced the aerial portion of the routine that would take place directly before the petals would move. With just the two of you instead of the whole class, you spun closer together and once you were within reach Kuvira grabbed your waist with her free hand and pulled you in close so she could lock you in a passionate kiss. 

You widen your eyes in shock, staying still for a moment as you process this overwhelming moment before pressing your lips against hers in return. You both gently land on the floor but Kuvira doesn’t let you go, instead, her other hand grabs the back of your neck to steady you as she hungrily kisses you like you might just disappear any moment and it takes your breath away. 

Slowly, Kuvira pulls away from your lips but keeps you pulled close to her body, she stares deeply into your eyes as if searching for something, maybe disapproval? She won’t find any though because you want to stay here in her arms forever. 

Her hand that was originally holding the back of your neck pulls away and bends the petals of the flowers upwards so they surround you both and offer cover from the outside world. “Do you want to stop?” She leans down to nibble on your earlobe and whispers those words to you. Her hand that was on your waist and traveling up your body, skimming the underside of your breasts as she waits for your answers. “Well?” 

“N-No, Kuvira please” you beg, something inside her is unleashed at your words and she pulls you back into a crushing kiss while she slides a hand under your shirt to feel your bare skin. 

“Lay down,” she says in a commanding tone that leaves no room for argument, you happily oblige and immediately pull away from her. The chill of the metal against your warm skin sends goosebumps down your arms and the look Kuvira is giving you from above makes you feel even hotter. 

She straddles your hips and slides both of her hands underneath your waist, running them up to your sides and under your breasts before pulling them away to pull your shirt off, you lean up off the metal to make it easier for her and she flings somewhere behind her. Kuvira puts both her hands on your shoulders and gently pushes you back down so your bareback and shoulders are against the cold metal. 

She threads her fingers through your hair and scratches at your scalp as she leans back down to kiss you once more. You moan at the blissful feeling of her warm body against your own and her nails on your scalp, giving her perfect access to your open mouth. You’ve never felt anything like this before, you’d decided to wait for your soulmate to share your first kiss, your first time and the wait was entirely worth it. 

You give yourself to each other in the dance studio that night, whilst Kuvira doesn’t coddle you she does gently guide you and give you praise when you do something right. You feel so in tune with her now as you curl your naked body against her own. She wraps an arm around your waist to tug you closer as you both try to catch your breath from the mind-blowing activity you just partook in. 

You’re about to tell her how much you like her, how excited you are to discover more about her when she beats you to the punch, “I think we should keep this to ourselves for now.” You sharply pull away from her, your brows pinched together in confusion. Your heart feels the first pinprick of heartache Kuvira will give you. “What? But we’re soulmates, why should we keep this a secret?” 

Kuvira rolls her eyes and sits up to face you. “I just want us to be able to cherish this thing between us as it grows. If we tell everyone suddenly we’ll be bombarded with questions that will only stress us out.” 

Your shoulders sag as you think about it, you don’t want to keep this a secret. All your life you dreamed of the day you’d meet your soulmate, the day you could have someone to hold hands with in public and go on dates with, maybe even kiss in the botanical gardens. 

“I guess…” you gulp, “if it’s only for a while then I guess it can remain a secret.” 

Oh, how you wish you could take that back after everything that is about to happen.

———————————————————————————————————–

A few weeks later is the grand opening (which had to be postponed whilst Suyin and her army were gone to help Avatar Korra) of the dance troupes performance, you feel like you might vomit and suddenly the last thing you want to do is go up there just so you can mess it up. Especially since you and Kuvira are the final act, twisting your legs together in the air as you each balance on your other foot so the flower can unfold around you. 

That flower has caused you so much trouble since that night with Kuvira, throughout the dress rehearsal the night before you kept messing up anytime you so much as touched the metal because your thoughts became consumed by her and what you both had done. 

You hadn’t had many moments alone since but in the locker room after the dress rehearsal, Kuvira had let her hand brush against your naked back as you changed into clean clothes after your shower and suddenly you were set alight with that same fire she ignited the other night. 

You must look like you’re unwell because Suyin comes into view and she places her hands on your shoulders to give them a reassuring squeeze. “You can do this y/n, I believe you,” she says in an encouraging tone. 

“I wish you didn’t, what if I mess up?” 

“People mess up sometimes, all you have to do is pick yourself back up and try again. You can’t be too hard on yourself y/n, I’ve seen how you’ve really changed these last few practices. Those private lessons with Kuvira must have helped” she drops her hands from your shoulders and gives you a bright smile before rushing off, claiming she has to check on the lights. 

You flush at her words, Kuvira’s lessons did help… sort of. One of the stagehands calls out that it’s time and you walk over to the stage entrance. On the other side of the stage stands Kuvira with half of the dancers behind her. She simply holds your gaze for a minute before the curtain draws and the dance must begin. You force down any thoughts you get of that night as you perform the routine and it’s going so well, when it gets to the part where the flower closes around you guys you suddenly feel too exposed and scandalized. Despite your thoughts Kuvira still hooks her foot with your own, she sends a small smile your way that calms you just a bit as the flower begins to bloom once more. 

The crowd erupts into applause and whistles as flowers are thrown onto the stage, you and Kuvira unhook your feet and bow with the rest of the troupe before exiting the stage for the next talent to take the stage, it was some new instrument a student had metal bent, something called a harp.  

Everyone begins to hug one another and congratulate them, Suyin pulls you into a quick side hug and softly says “I told you that you could do it.” It feels good to have her say that, to know that she’s right and despite being new to this you did well enough to not humiliate yourself. Other people begin to crowd the backstage as dancers’ family members and friends come to congratulate them and offer them bouquets. 

Your parents rush up to pull you into a tight hug that knocks the wind out of you, they shower you in praises and your mom kisses the top of your head before pulling away. “You did amazing, y/n. We’re both so proud of you” your dad says as he hands you a bouquet of lotuses. You’re about to call over Kuvira to introduce her as a friend and to tell your parents about how much she helped you but the sight in front of you kills the words that were on the tip of your tongue. 

Baatar Jr. has his arm wrapped around Kuvira’s waist as he offers her a bouquet and gives her this wide smile. “Junior, why didn’t you tell us?” You hear Suyin say in a betrayed tone. Baatar Sr. has a hand on Suyin’s shoulder as he looks disapprovingly at the couple in front of him. 

“I knew you guys would overreact! Kuvira and I are in love. I hope you both realize how important she is to me.” Baatar Jr. spits out, Kuvira places a hand on his chest to settle him down and flashes the two parents a smile. 

“I was hoping you both would approve of us.” You can’t stand there and watch anymore as she flaunts her relationship in front of you like you don’t matter. 

“I’m a bit tired from the performance, I think I’m gonna head home,” you tell your parents, trying not to let them know how badly you’re hurting.  

“Oh well, we wanted to take you out to dinne-” 

“Maybe tomorrow, I think I just wanna take a shower and go to sleep,” you say before walking off. Your parents share a look of concern as they watch your retreating figure. In a matter of seconds, your once overjoyed demeanor turned to something melancholic. 

Once out of the building you walk to the botanical gardens knowing that at this time of night no one is there, your parents will probably return home soon and you don’t want to worry them with your crying. You find a spot tucked away from sight behind a bunch of sunflowers and lean your back against the tree. 

You’re so confused, she’s your soulmate and yet she’s with someone else. Baatar Jr. said they were in love which must mean they’ve been together for some time. She never mentioned him to you. Suddenly the desire to keep your relationship a secret makes sense and you feel stupid for playing along. 

At least an hour passes as you cry out all your emotions until you’re just sitting there numbly trying to figure out what to do next. A crunch of a leaf can be heard from in front of you and your head snaps up and away from your lap. Kuvira is standing there, she’s changed out of her dancing clothes and is in a casual outfit now, you look away from her, unable to look at her first without crying again. 

“He wasn’t meant to tell them tonight,” she confesses and you scoff. Is that supposed to make you feel better?

“What are you doing Kuvira? W-We’re soulmates and yet you’re with this guy despite telling me I had to keep us a secret.” You stand from your spot and your muscles ache from sitting in that uncomfortable position for so long, you try to ignore her as you go to walk away but she grabs your forearm as you go to pass her. 

“I don’t love him,” she admits “but I need him for something and the only way he’ll do it is if he thinks I do.” You rear your head back in shock, what in the world is going on. 

“What could you possibly want from him? A seat at the Beifong family table!?” You shout and Kuvira aggressively shushes you. You rip your arm out of her grasp but stay still as you wait to hear what she’ll say next. 

“After the earth queen’s death the earth kingdom is in disarray and Suyin won’t step up to help those who are suffering. Junior has inventions that can help us rebuild these impoverished towns and cities so we can bring them back to their former glory.” Kuvira sighs, her palm going to rub at her forehead “he won’t go against his mother unless we’re together, I can’t let those people have their homes ransacked by raiders and be left to starve when we can make a difference.” 

“So you’re… manipulating him” you murmur, Kuvira’s eyes narrow a bit at your words and she takes a step closer to you, you stumble back until your back hits the tree behind you and Kuvira keeps walking until she’s against you. Her hands go to rest above your head as she looks into your eyes. 

“I’m pushing him in the right direction. I want to leave soon to start and I want you to come with,” she moves one of her hands to grasp your chin when you try to look away from her and says “we all have to make sacrifices for this cause, y/n. Mine is playing pretend with him and yours is having to keep us a secret.” 

Your eyes water at the idea, you don’t want to leave Zaofu behind. Your parents are here and you think you might want to pursue a career in dancing. Kuvira grips your chin just a fraction tighter and brings her lips to yours. It’s a deep, slow kiss and suddenly you’re consumed with her just like the other day in the dance studio. You moan as she lightly tugs at your bottom lip as she pulls away from you, she lets go of it and you can feel it swell a bit from her actions. You slowly open your eyes back up and she’s giving you this intense look that has your knees weak. 

“Please, I want you there with me,” she says in a husky tone that has you nodding in agreement, she grins before pulling you back into a kiss, this one is far more heated than the last.

You wish you’d said no. 

———————————————————————————————————–

 “I think we should keep this to ourselves for now.” 

For now turned into a year, once the train tracks were built Bolin along with Varrick and Zhu Li joined your cause. In front of everyone, Kuvira played the role of not only being the compassionate leader but also the love of Baatar’s life. Yeah, he no longer went by Baatar Jr. Kuvira convinced him to drop the honorific. 

Behind closed doors, late at night when everyone was asleep Kuvira would come and visit you, most times you guys would passionately make love as she took charge but sometimes, and these times were your favorite, she’d lay in bed beside you and talk about all you guys would do once your mission was over. “We could get married,” you whispered one night and Kuvira pulled you in a slow, sweet kiss before murmuring against your lips “you’d look good in white.” 

Right now those sweet moments are far from your mind though as Baatar hands Kuvira a file in the main cabin of the train where meetings are held, he places a hand on her waist and you look away as you try to push down the anger bubbling within you. You were about to stop in a rather large town that had fallen on hard times, as all had. And if all goes well you might need to take a moment for yourself. This train was starting to feel suffocating and you were this close to metal bending the roof open.

The train lurches to a stop, sending Bolin almost off the couch opposite you, he grips the back of it to keep from falling flat on his face and you grab the armrest to your right. As always, Kuvira is the only one who seems to remain unaffected, she stumbles back two steps before regaining her balance and squaring her shoulders. 

“We’re here,” she says in her normal calm voice before heading to the door to step outside. The town is surrounded by lush greenery and towering trees. The buildings tower to three stories and market stalls are lining the streets. It looks like it was once a hub, maybe a stopping point for travelers, but now there are holes in some of the buildings from raiders and the market stalls have been torn apart. All of the citizens are waiting for them at the entrance of the city and you note how tired and thin they look. 

“Woah, looks like we are definitely needed here” Bolin mutters beside you. As Kuvira talks to the mayor in private, you all begin to load up carts and trucks with crates of food, they always give into her eventually so there wasn’t much point in waiting. The meeting between the two takes an hour and a half, when the mayor walks off the train he wears a look of defeat and Kuvira saunters out with that same air of confidence that makes you wonder if she was born with it. 

She walks over to you and signals for the men beside you to start giving out the crates of food and supplies. “Another small victory,” she mutters. 

“If anything I’d say it’s a big one, this is a large province and this town is the only one in it. Not only that but it’s a hub for trading and travelers, having this under our belt is helpful.” You look into her eyes and notice that same dissatisfied look she gets any time someone praises her. “This is good, Vira.” 

“I told you not to call me that in public,” her tone is scolding and she looks away so she doesn’t have to see the disappointment in your eyes. Whilst everyone thought you two were close friends she was still worried about someone figuring it out and telling Baatar. He was too oblivious to figure it out himself but quite a few times she caught Zhu Li looking between the two of you when you’re deep in conversation. “Besides, I won’t be happy until we’ve united the entire earth kingdom. “ 

You bite your lip as another one of those oh too familiar aches in your heart. It feels like someone has gotten a needle and aggressively stabbed at the center of it. “I’m going to go help,” you say before walking away, she doesn’t call after you or even say goodbye 

Later, once all the supplies are given out, the townspeople decide to celebrate in the main square, live music is being played as everyone dances and laughs. Kuvira usually makes a short appearance to things like this just to make everyone happy before heading back to the train. Usually, you trail behind her along with Baatar while Bolin and Varrick tend to stay for an extra hour or two. Most of the time they stumble in drunk and loudly shush one another. 

“C’mon y/n, just stay a while longer!” Bolin shouts over the music, he gives you another cup of alcohol, a part of you doesn’t want to. You’ve never stayed behind to celebrate after Kuvira heads back and you wonder if that means she won’t show up in your room as per usual. But it’s just one extra hour… 

You take the cup from Bolin’s hand and down it, causing him to cheer. The alcohol burns down your throat and you cough from taking it all at once. Varrick saddles up beside him and slaps his hand on the young earth bender’s shoulder. “What are we getting excited about?” 

“Y/n’s actually gonna stay and party!” Bolin shouts, you fill the cup back up and take a sip. You haven’t been drunk since Zaofu, you deserve this break. “Wait, you’re telling me y/n isn’t a stick in the mud? Well, that’s the shock of the century!” Varrick replies you roll your eyes at his comment, trying to not let it bother you. You could be fun, you were fun before everything happened. 

“Let’s dance!” You shout and finish up your drink before setting it on the table to head to the designated area for dancing. You thought of the studio back in Zaofu, how freeing it felt, and how you had felt like you’d finally found your calling. Bolin cheers you on as he dances beside you and Varrick keeps making ridiculous comments about the parties he used to throw back in republic city. You make out the words platypus bear and skiing at one point but decide to not ask him to explain what the hell he’s talking about. 

An hour passes, maybe two, before the three of you are stumbling back to the train. You haven’t had this much fun in so long and your cheeks hurt from laughing. You’re warm from the alcohol despite the cool breeze brushing up against your skin and at some point, you took your jacket off to keep from sweating. You weren’t meant to be out of uniform when out of your room but it was late at night and you didn’t think much of it. 

When you guys climbed up the steps to the train and entered the main compartment Bolin began to loudly talk about how much he missed his soulmate, Opal. Suddenly your bright mood dimmed at the fact that you couldn’t talk about your soulmate to anyone, but your mood was truly ruined when Bolin said, “y’know one-day y/n, you’re gonna meet your soulmate and it’s gonna feel amazing just you wait!” 

You forced out a chuckle before softly bidding them goodnight and walking off to your room, you heard Bolin ask Varrick if he said something wrong but you were too far away to hear his reply. When you opened your door a part of you hoped Kuvira would be inside, but she wasn’t. Your shoulders slumped as you kicked off your boots before falling into bed. You didn’t bother with undoing your updo or changing into proper sleeping clothes. 

When you wake up you are alone, usually, Kuvira would wake up before the sun rose and leave but not before kissing your forehead and whispering that she loved you. It was always a great way to start your day but today you were alone. You got dressed and fixed your mess of hair before exiting your room to head down towards the dining cart.

 Your room was right beside Kuvira’s which was beside Zhu Li’s and then it was Baatars, Bolin’s was on the other side of your room. Thankfully the walls were thick though so you didn’t have to worry about him hearing you and Kuvira late at night.

The door to Baatar’s room opens, but instead of the young engineer walking out, Kuvira does, she’s in her uniform from yesterday which you can tell because there’s a few wrinkles and her hair is down. She makes eye contact with you before heading to her room and without thinking you follow after her. Technically you aren’t allowed in her room for appearance reasons but your heart is racing and you need her to reassure you that what you just saw wasn’t what you thought it was. 

You close the door after you, trying not to slam it but you desperately want to. “What were you doing in there?” you ask and part of you internally cringes at how you sound. It’s obvious in your tone how hurt you are, how confused. Kuvira simply begins to undress from her old clothes and takes her time formulating a reply.

“He was getting suspicious of my lack of affection for him,” is her reply. You back up until your knees hit the edge of her bed and fall into a sitting position. “So you…” you gulp, “slept with him?” 

“I did what needed to be done. Besides, you weren’t here last night,” she spits out. By now she’s in her underwear which would usually cause you to flush but right now your vision is blurring from tears and you feel bile rising from your throat but it’s not due to last night. “So what, it was some kind of way to get back at me for letting loose for once?!” 

Kuvira whirls around to glare at you, she has a pair of pants on now and she stalks over to you like you’re her prey until she’s between your legs. She roughly grabs your chin to make sure you keep eye contact with her and she says “so me fucking you senseless isn’t enough to alleviate the stress from the day before?” 

Your heart races, “Vira…” You aren’t sure if you like this part of her, in a fucked up way it’s kind of hot but it’s also terrifying and you feel so small. “If you disobey me or humiliate me again you’ll be punished the same way you were last night. If you are to one day become my wife you’ll need to start working on your image and getting drunk in public isn’t a good look.” 

She lets go of your chin and swiftly walks back over to her closet to finish getting dressed. “You may leave.” Her tone doesn’t leave any room for argument so you blink away the tears threatening to spill from your eyes before promptly leaving your lover’s room. Suddenly you’ve lost your appetite so you head back to your room where you plan on spending the rest of your day, As you go to open your door, Bolin sluggishly opens his own and walks into the bright hallway with a groan. 

You look away from him but not in time as he notices your red eyes and the tears threatening to spill, he steps forward, a look of concern taking over his features but you quickly enter your room and slam the door shut behind you. 

You miss home. 

[livesincerely]

alriGht what about jacks dad becuase now im interested 👀

Might I offer you a scene in these trying times? ;)

00000

“Just because I’ve lost control of my life doesn’t mean you have to give up yours,” Davey says.

“You ain’t lost control of your life,” Jack says, which is so incredibly untrue and so thoroughly not the point that Davey could almost scream in frustration. “You barely had a life to lose control of⁠—it got stolen from you months ago.”

“Jackie,” Davey says, determined to stay on track. “I’m not saying I don’t appreciate it. These two weeks have been like something out of a daydream, and I’ll never be able to thank you enough for giving me all this. But I can’t let you sacrifice everything you’ve worked towards for me⁠—that’s not fair to you.”

“Davey,” Jack says, already shaking his head. “I’m not sacrificing anything I can’t live without. I want to be here, with you.”

“You say that now,” Davey counters. “But a few weeks from now? A few months? You’ll regret all the time you wasted worrying about me when you realize what you’ve lost, I know you will, and I can’t risk⁠—” 

Davey cuts himself off, biting his lip. 

He takes a breath, re-centers, then carefully continues with, “So, we should just stop this now, while it’s not too late. We can turn around, head back home, beg forgiveness... and go back to our lives.”

“Is that what you want?” Jack asks quietly.

“It’s what’s best,” Davey says. “We can’t run forever, so we might as well save ourselves the heartache.”

Jack doesn’t respond for a long time⁠—long enough that Davey thinks he’s not going to acknowledge what he said at all. But then he lets out a soft, whispering sigh.

“Do you remember freshman year, when my dad got outta prison?” Jack asks. 

Davey's head whips around to stare at him, eyes wide. But Jack’s hands are perfectly steady on the steering wheel, his gaze fixed out on the sprawling highway before them.

Suddenly uncertain, Davey says, “Of course I do.”

“Then you remember how bad it was, right?” Jack continues, and it’s only the tone of his voice⁠—too perfectly controlled and even⁠—that gives away the depth of his feelings. “How I fell apart, just absolutely raging at everyone and everything, all the time? I couldn’t sleep, couldn’t concentrate. I stopped turning in assignments, then stopped going to class altogether, because what was the point? What was the point in anything, in pretending to even try, if they were just gonna give me back to my old man?”

“I remember,” Davey says softly, and he does. 

He remembers it like it was yesterday, the worry and fear that welled up inside him, watching Jack spiral and sink under the weight of it all, how utterly useless he’d felt watching his best friend struggle and suffer. It’d been absolute hell. 

“You held me together, Dave,” Jack says. “I wouldn’t have made it through that year without you.”

“Yes, you would’ve⁠—”

“No, Davey, I’m serious,” Jack insists, and even at this angle Davey can see that his mouth is set, grim and solemn, across his face. “If you hadn’t’a been there, I’m not sure what woulda happened. Because the others… they love me and they tried their best, but you were just… you were fucking incredible. You put up with all my mood swings, kept me from doin’ anything irreversibly stupid⁠—and god knows I considered doin’ all kinds of stupid shit back then, just desperate and panicking⁠. Half the time you knew what I needed even before I did, and when you didn’t you would sit there and listen and help me figure it out, or just keep me company when I couldn’t stand to be alone with my thoughts but also didn’t wanna be around anyone.”

“What, did I not count as someone?” Davey says, and he’s trying for a bit of levity, but the effect is ruined by the rasp in his voice.

Jack looks at him. It’s just a brief meeting of their eyes before he looks back at the road, but it feels weighted, a deliberate contact: like how it feels to have an arm thrown around your waist or a hand pressed against the space between your shoulder blades. 

“You ain’t someone,” Jack says, the words ringing with warmth. “You’re more than just someone. You’re Davey.”

Before Davey can come up with any kind of response to this declaration, Jack continues with, “You were there for me. Not ‘cause you had to be, but because I needed my best friend to drag me, limping and sweating and bleeding and crying, through the worst year of my life. Because you loved me enough to make sure I got through it, no matter what. That’s what you told me, remember? That you were gonna get me through the year, even if you had to carry me along on your back?”

Davey nods, helpless to do anything else, his voice trapped somewhere in the back of his throat.

“So the only way I’m wastin’ my time now is if you were wastin’ your time back then,” Jack says, each syllable crisp and concise. “And, well, I wouldn’t blame you for thinkin’ that, but⁠—”

It comes tearing out of him: “You are not a waste of my time⁠—!”

“And you aren’t a waste of mine,” Jack smoothly interjects, and he’s smirking, just a little, because he’s an asshole. “Glad we could agree on that one.”

Davey blinks at the side of Jack’s head, realizing, finally, that he’s been thoughtfully outmaneuvered. For several minutes there’s nothing but blur of open fields on either side of the road, the wide expanse of endless blue sky above them.

“This is different,” Davey says, once he thinks he can manage the words. “I know you’re trying to make me feel better about it, but we both know this is different.”

“Don’t seem so different to me,” Jack says calmly. “Seems like we’re both making sure the other gets taken care of, however that has to happen.”

“It’s different,” Davey insists. “You needed someone to lean on during a rough patch, I’m dragging you across the fucking country. You’re putting your whole life on hold for me.”

“I would argue that I’m the one draggin’ you across the country,” Jack says. “You ain’t exactly puttin’ a gun to my head⁠—”

“Stop pretending like this isn’t a big deal!” Davey shouts, and the outburst takes them both by surprise. “Jack, you have to see that this is⁠— That this isn’t just⁠—”

“David,” Jack says, and there’s a world of feeling in just that one word. “You’re not gonna be able to talk me out of this. Because you were hurting. Because they were crushing you. Because you needed to get away from all of that and someone had to drive the getaway car. Because you needed someone to push you to go and keep you from talking yourself into a life of misery, because that’s what this is, you know? This is you feeling guilty about stealing even a fucking second of your happiness back, and I’m not gonna let them have you again until you can tell me that you actually want to go home, not just that you think you should.”

“You stayed,” Davey whispers. “Back then, with everything… you stayed. I made sure that you stayed.”

“And that’s why I needed you: to anchor me, to keep me steady.” Jack says. “But Dave, if they weighed you down with any more chains, you’d sink right through the ground. It’s different on the surface, yeah, but not at the heart of it. Not where it counts.” 

Jack reaches over and places his hand over Davey’s, giving it a gentle squeeze, then leaves it there—their hands curled together over the console.

“Let me take care of you the way you took care of me, okay?” Jack continues softly, carefully. “Let me be the place where you hide, at least for a little while.”

Davey stares down at their joined hands for what feels like an eternity⁠⁠—until his vision goes blurry and his eyes start to sting⁠—feeling at once horribly guilty and terribly, terribly grateful. 

With a shaky exhale, he squeezes back.

“Okay,” Davey says quietly, because there’s nothing else to be said in the face of all that is Jack Kelly. “At least for a little while.”

00000

[ororowrites]

By the Open Fire - Yahya x Black Character

I’m getting back into the writing spirit and decided to write a little Christmas one-shot about my latest celebrity crush. Merry Christmas, Happy Kwanzaa and Happy Holidays! 

Warnings: Very, very, light smut, fluffy as hell

Word Count: 2,664

Six months was entirely too long to be away from the love of her life. 

Candace tapped the tip of her pen against the blank page, hoping her writer’s block would magically disappear. Being an actress was so much easier than trying to write a novel. Why didn’t Candace just stick to her day job? Since the pandemic began, she was trying her hand at other talents and writing a novel seemed to be the one wish on her wish list that stood out. On top of Yahya being out of the country filming for most of the year, Candace was in search of a way to fight a depression that was on the brink of flooding her life. Her filming project had come to a halt until 2021 and she was stuck in her Manhattan apartment until it was safe to come out again.

Yahya would be home in a couple of days and Candace was looking forward to his arrival. So many months a part made her heart ache and the heart below her waist. After hundreds of facetime calls, numerous texts a day and a few Zoom sessions that included their shared friends, her man would be there in the flesh. 

“Fuck,” Candace cursed under her breath. The block wasn’t budging, forcing the actress to give up and retreat to the kitchen for wine. Her phone rang, interrupting her attempt to brainstorm for the next chapter in her book. “You always call at the perfect time,” she groaned at her twin sister on the other end of the line. 

“Candy, you can never just say hello like a normal human,” Trinity laughed. “But did mama call you with the latest gossip?” 

“No, but she’s been texting me all damn day. I’ve been busy so I haven’t checked them yet. Wassup,” she pressed, knowing the gossip was most likely church related. Their mother had been an usher at the same church since they were nine. 

“Girl,” Trinity exclaimed, before explaining the recent Chicago gossip. “Mrs. Jackson got caught cheating with James. Someone saw them out at the park together, kissing up on each other and all that.” 

“Ewww, in this panoramic,” Candace gagged. “I’m not shocked though. That old floozy was always flirting with daddy and almost made mama beat her ass one Easter Sunday. Remember that?” 

Trinity cackled, “Boooooy, mama was about to peel that woman’s skin back and break her neck. Ol’ girl was trying it that day and knows she is too old to still be acting like that. But enough about Florence, what have you been up to today? Ain’t your man on his way back to New York?” 

 Candace rolled her eyes because she knew where this conversation was going. Her sister had four children, leaving Candace the only childless sibling left in the pack of five children. 

“He’ll be back in two days and then we’re going to Colorado for Christmas. Since we can’t gather for the holidays, figured we’d go somewhere where we can safely distance ourselves but still get away. You know,” Candace said, swirling the wine around in her glass before taking a sip. 

“Mmmhhhhmmm. You gon’ get knocked up in them mountains,” Trinity added in a serious tone. “You two renting out a cabin or something up there?” 

“Ain’t nobody getting knocked up until she has a ring on her finger. Yes, we’re getting a cabin and just chillin’ out. Yahya has been working and needs a break. I’ve been....lonely.” Candace paced her kitchen, trying to think of an excuse to end this call before her twin irritated her soul. 

“Ya’ll haven’t seen each in months, he’s going to tear--” 

“Trin!” One major difference between the two of them was the lack of filter on Trinity’s part. The woman would say anything in front of anyone. “Look, I need to go straighten up before before Yah gets here. I’ll talk to you later?” 

Trinity sighed loudly on the other end because she knew her sister was rushing her off the call. Not liking people in her relationship business bugged Trinity because she was the nosey twin that wanted to know everything, much like their mother. “Well at least you won’t be needing to replace the batteries in that vibrator any time soon since the real Dr. Manhattan is back in the picture.” Before Candace could reply to the vulgar comment, Trinity squeezed out a quick ‘love you’ before hanging up. 

“Nasty ass,” Candace rolled her eyes and placed the phone back in the pocket of her jeans. 

The next two days were the same song. Candace’s brain did not want to focus on writing, so she eventually gave up and settled on online shopping to ease her frustration. The night her beautiful man was supposed to return, the actress fell asleep on the couch. His flight had been delayed by a couple of hours and he didn’t make it home until 3AM. 

He quietly entered the apartment, knowing Candace could never stay awake past twelve. The 6′3 actor, tip toed across the floor doing his best ballerina impression. Light snores could be heard over the infomercial playing on the television. She looked peaceful, almost child-like curled up on the sofa under her favorite coral throw. Yahya slowly leaned in, placing a soft kiss on Candace’s pouted lips. She stirred slightly, mumbling under her breath and fell back into a slumber. 

“Baby,” he sung into her ear, placing another kiss on her cheek. 

“Hmm.” Candace finally opened her eyes to see her Christmas gift standing right in front of her. Even with blurred vision, the smell of his cologne was a dead giveaway. She screeched and scurried to her feet to throw her arms around Yahya’s neck. Naturally, her legs wrapped around his waist as he rocked them back and forth. “I missed you so much.” 

“I missed you too,” he grunted, peppering Candace’s face in kisses. “My baaaaaaby,” Yahya sang as they fell to the sofa in a heap of long limbs. “It smells good in here, what you cook?” 

“Negro, you’re always looking for the food. Ol’ hungry ass,” Candace shook her head and playfully punched her lover’s bicep. “But, I saved you some fried rice and shrimp...homemade because that’s the only dish I’m good at.” 

“Oh, that’s not the only dish you’re good at,” he bit his lip, pulling Candace into a slow, passionate kiss, showing her how much he really missed her. With both of them being in the industry, they understood the heartache that came with being in a relationship and not seeing your significant other for weeks or months at a time. In this case, their time away from each other was extended due to the pandemic. “Mmmmm,” Yahya hummed into Candace’s lips before pulling away. He wanted to save the X-rated loving for their trip when he would have more time to rest and beat the severe jet lag from flying across the world for 12 hours. 

“We should get some food in this belly, babe,” Candace couldn’t contain the big cheesy grin that made her cheeks hurt. 

------- 

Christmas Eve 

Toni Braxton’s sultry voice filled the cabin as Yahya finished pouring the wine for their night cap. They had a busy day on the slopes trying not to kill themselves or break any bones. 

“Baby, where your fine ass at,” Yahya called out, making his way to the living room. The fireplace crackled, sending waves of heat throughout the cabin’s living area. The sun had set, but the mountains were still glowing against the dark sky. Their view was impeccable and the mood was set for a night of bonding and loving. “Candy, don’t make me come get you.” He warned playfully, sitting in front of the fire on their floor palette they had built earlier that night. 

“What was that,” Candace teased, stopping in the doorway getting a front row view of Yahya’s bare upper half. His back muscles bulged as he tended to the fire. 

“You back there sleeping, old lady,” he asked, with his back still turned away from her. 

“No, I was back there wrapping one last gift,” she replied, her voice dropping an octave prompting Yahya to turn around. 

His eyes almost fell out of his head, “Damn girl.” Pulling his bottom lip into his mouth, he moved forward, inspecting the gift that was screaming to be unwrapped. “This all for me?” 

“Every inch of it.” Her words almost came out as a moan. The way this man was eyeing her had moisture pooling between her legs. The fancy lingerie wouldn’t last long at this rate. Words became an afterthought when actions began to do all the talking. All it took was a soul turning kiss to send them both to the floor on their palette in front of the fireplace. Candace couldn’t tell if the fire had her skin tingling or the anticipation of having his hands rubbing over the most sensitive parts of her body. The wine and fruits sitting on the mantle quickly became an afterthought. 

For minutes, they enjoyed exploring each other and parts they hadn’t touched in months. Yahya was nestled between Candace’s thighs, both of them breathless and horny. Candace’s lace get up was quickly removed and thrown to the side. She giggled when his lips grazed her belly button, those giggles soon turning into pants and whispered obscenities. With gentle licks, he coaxed her clit out of its hood.

 Toys were fun but they weren’t the real thing and oh did she miss the real thing. See, the real thing knew exactly how to pull her close to the edge before sending her back. Her man’s skilled tongue sank deeper drawing intricate patterns in her center as she massaged the top of his head with her fingertips. 

Candace’s breath hitched in her throat and her thighs shook awaiting the impending release. “Jesus,” she moaned as her body suddenly felt light and her center thumped. 

“Still as sweet as I remember,” he grinned, kissing Candace’s inner thigh. 

Another track on their Toni Braxton Christmas playlist began to play and Yahya rested his head on Candace’s stomach. Time was precious and Yahya didn’t want to waste an ounce of the rare quiet moment they had. Soon, they’d both be filming again and the world would be back to normal. 

“What’s on your mind, baby,” Candace asked, her heart and breath back to a steady rhythm. 

“I don’t spend enough time with you. At least not lately,” he began. “I knew what I was getting into when we were back in school. Still makes me feel bad though.” 

“Yah, I enjoy all the moments that we do get to spend together. You’ve been working your ass off this year. Yes, I would love more times like this but we should also celebrate all your accomplishments. Because you’re doing the damn thang and I’m so proud of you.” 

“Thank you. You always say the right shit to get me together,” he chuckled. “Sometimes a nigga just be in his feelings and I missed the hell out of you those six months.” 

“Yeah, six months has never gone by that slowly. You should see my credit card statements. I’ve never purchased that many sex toys in my life,” Candace covered her face with her arm. 

“Word? Well.... you won’t be needing those sex toys for awhile.” 

A smirk formed on her lips when she felt him bump against her thigh, “No, no, you just sit back and relax. I got this.” Sitting up, Candace placed a hand on Yahya’s chest, prompting him to switch her spots. 

“You are beautiful,” Yahya’s eyes gleamed. After all these years, he could still make Candace blush like a little school girl. “Don’t hide that smile, girl.” His large hands massaged her thighs as she eased him inside of her. 

They both exhaled, letting Toni Braxton serenade them through the night.

--------- 

Christmas Morning

They had finally made it to bed and got a few hours of sleep before Christmas morning arrived and it was time to get up for their next day of adventures. 

First, they needed to re-fuel their bodies after the festivities that took place the night before in front of the fireplace and in the bedroom. The shower also got some of their loving that morning. Candace could hear Yahya singing his own version of Joy to the World while whipping up his famous oatmeal. That man never knew the words to any song but sung his own words with all the confidence in the world. 

“Yah, do you ever know the words,” Candace questioned, placing a quick kiss on his cheek before grabbing a bowl from one of the kitchen shelves. 

“Nope,” he replied in a matter of fact tone. “It’s the Abdul-Mateen version.”

“Uh huh, sure.” 

Over breakfast, they continued joking about Yahya’s talent of making up his own versions of songs. Joy and love was on full display. They had always been the couple to roast each other and the next minute adore each other like the two biggest saps in the world.. Their relationship was built on a strong friendship they developed while they were in film school before reconnecting a few years later. 

They walked a short distance to one of the coffee shops near their cabin to grab hot chocolate. It was a chilly 45 degrees, but to avoid sitting in the shop, they walked back to their rental, taking a scenic route that Yahya suggested. 

“If we get lost or I end up falling off one of these mountains, I hope my family doesn’t kill you,” Candace joked, admiring the beautiful scene before them. 

“Oh, I know where we are. I was out here early yesterday morning trying to find the perfect spot,” Yahya replied. 

“Huh, perfect spot for what?” 

He didn’t answer right away and instead reached for Candace’s hand, stopping her in her tracks. “Something I’ve been wanting to do for awhile.” Placing his cup on one of the rocks, Yahya pulled a box from his pocket and got down on one knee. 

“What...what...” For once, Candace was speechless and caught completely off guard. 

“It’s hard as hell to surprise you and I’ve been trying to think of the perfect time to do this without your nosey ass finding out.” Tears began to flow down Candace’s cheeks. “We’ve been at this for a few years and I’ve had some of my best moments with you by my side. I want to make what we have forever.” He opened the small box to reveal a beautiful emerald cut ring. “Say love... would you marry me?” 

Being the goofball that she was, Candace laughed between her tears “You’re trying to get me pregnant on this trip, aren’t you?” 

“Well that can be arranged if you say yes.” 

“Ye...yes, of course!” Her vision blurred as Yahya slid the rock on her finger and stood to his feet to kiss his future bride. Moments later Yahya’s phone rang with an incoming Facetime call. 

“Hey Trinity, hey moms,” Yahya cheesed, turning his phone to share the screen with Candace. “Looks like you two aren’t getting rid of me anytime soon.” 

“She said yes,” Trinity screamed, jumping up and down with their mother. “Aye, aye, ayyyeeeeee.” 

Still in complete shock and happiness overflowing, Candace shrieked, “Wait, you two knew about this the entire time!” 

“Yep! It’s been burning my ass to keep this secret from you all this time,” Trinity teased, sticking out her tongue. “He took mom with him to ring shop last year and everything.” 

“Welcome to the family, son. Congratulations baby,” Ms. Fredrick sang, clapping for the happy couple on the other end of the call. 

“Now, I hope you two are using protection out there because having a baby before the wedding is-” 

“Trinity,” Candace called out, shaking her head. 

They should have followed Trinity’s advice because approximately two months later..... 

Hope you all enjoyed! This is the first piece I’ve written in a year. I have no idea if I’ m going to continue the stories I began before my hiatus, yet. But, we will explore that in the coming year! Who knows, we may get more Candace and Yahya depending on how hard writer’s block slaps me. May the new year bring you all peace and joy! 

[owl-with-a-pen]

also aw, please imagine Brainy and Alex both not being able to sleep, and staying up together in the Tower, talking about how much they miss Kara

- This is too cute and it inspired me to write a quick piece about it!

Brainy hadn’t moved from the Tower’s computer since they’d saved M’gann.

Alex knew why. Of course, she knew why. It was the same reason she’d found herself back here in the first place, even though her girlfriend was waiting patiently for her at their apartment. At their apartment. God, Alex only wished the warmth that knowledge brought was enough to melt the ice that still sat heavily inside her stomach, sending a fierce ache directly to her chest.

At least here, she felt like she could be of use, somehow. After spending most of the morning holed up in bed, it didn’t feel right to ignore this any longer.

And she knew she wasn’t the only one.

Brainy’s face looked so washed out behind the glare of the screen, highlighting the bags that hung heavy beneath his eyes. Still, there was something behind that look, something that hadn’t been not even a few hours ago. 

Alex had noticed it before – for just a moment, back there, fighting by his side against the Phantoms, it had felt like they’d finally begun to slip back into old habits, like the last few months had been nothing but a bad dream.

But, they weren’t, and Brainy was still holding back so much. Alex could see it written all over him, even as he tirelessly scoured his Phantom Zone map for the hundredth time that day, desperate to find Kara, to set things right.

Even with a multitude of enhancements at his disposal, she knew he was pushing himself. Sooner or later, Brainy was gonna crash.

Which was why Alex ambled her way over to Brainy’s desk, armed with two piping hot cups.

“Coffee,” Alex announced, setting one down loudly on the desk.

Brainy didn’t move his attention from the screen. He stared at it pragmatically, eyes narrowed. “I’m not thirsty,” he mumbled.

“That wasn’t a question,” Alex said, gesturing to the cup. “You need it.”

Brainy snorted. This time, he did look up at her, his eyes red rimmed. “I think you’ll find I’m fully capable of functioning adequately without it.”

“Uh-huh,” Alex said, rolling her eyes. She took a sip of her own coffee, peering over his shoulder at the complex diagrams repainting themselves over and over. “When was the last time you took a break?”

Brainy stilled, his hands stiffening suddenly over the keys. Frustration was practically leaking out from his pores, but this close, Alex knew it was more than that. She’d witnessed a few lapses in this cool and controlled personality Brainy had been trying to output over the last few days, not to mention the keyboard he’d nearly snapped in half in front of J’onn. 

When Brainy didn’t speak, Alex sighed, stepping carefully into his space. “Brainy?”

Brainy ducked his head, a tight grimace pulling at the corners of his lips. “We don’t have time,” he spat. “Every second we waste, Kara is-is out there, cold and alone and-and I can’t stand that.” He pushed himself from the desk suddenly, half turning in his chair to face her. “You shouldn’t either!”

“Trust me,” Alex said evenly. “I can’t.”

Brainy’s eyes were shimmering, desperation and pain flooding all at once to the surface. After everything, though? It was nearly a relief to see it. It definitely made Alex feel more confident to keep talking. “It hurts,” she admitted. “Every second knowing she’s in that hell, it’s like… it’s like sometimes I just forget how to breathe.”

“I know the feeling.” Brainy laughed weakly, wiping at his face. “I know the feeling and-and I can’t bear it. How do you bear it?”

“I don’t,” Alex said simply. “Not on my own, at least. I take solace in the fact that I’m surrounded with loved ones fighting just as hard as me to get Kara back.” When Brainy’s lips trembled, Alex reached for him impulsively, taking his shoulder firmly. “We’re all hurting, Brainy. But… but we’re hurting together. Sharing that burden, talking about how it makes us feel, knowing that we’re here for each other. That’s how I’m getting through every day.”

Brainy’s eyes darted from her suddenly, looking everywhere and nowhere at once. He sniffed. “I… am unfamiliar with that.”

“Sharing?” Alex snorted. “Really? You?” She winked. “I never would have guessed.”

Brainy ruffled a little at that before his brow furrowed. He frowned in consideration. “Although… I believe I may have made progress today.”

“Oh?”

“I… shared. I think. With Lena.”

Alex’s eyes widened. “And how did that go?”

Brainy blinked, as though curious to know the answer for himself. “I said some truly… vile things, but I also admitted to emotions I had been harbouring for far too long. I felt... better once it was all out. Lighter.” His eyes clouded again, his lips twisting as he reached suddenly, desperately for his ring finger, turning it rhythmically. “But it’s all still in there. I thought that by doing what Lena advised, it would take that pain away… I thought-”

“Heartache doesn’t work like that,” Alex said, giving his shoulder a tight squeeze. “It’s slow and awful and creeps up on you even when you think you have it handled.” She smiled gently. “But, if you feel like you want to share again, take a little more weight off your shoulders, I’m right here.”

Brainy watched her weakly, eyes still glittering with unshed tears. In that moment, Alex wasn’t certain if what she’d said had reached through to him. That was, at least, until he reached hesitantly for the coffee on his desk, sipping her peace offering carefully. “Thank you,” he murmured.

Even with enough caffeine in that cup to kill a baby elephant, Alex knew it wouldn’t stop the inevitable. When Brainy yawned around his next gulp, she took that as her cue. “Alright,” she said firmly, “enough computer screens. You’re taking a break.”

“Alex-”

“I know half of those mapping commands are automatic, so don’t even try to make up an excuse. You need a break. Right now.” She shot him a glare. “Come with me.”

It took a few moments, but eventually Brainy begrudgingly stood from his chair. Alex couldn’t help but smirk when she noticed he’d taken the coffee along with him, trailing behind her in a sleep deprived daze.

She guided him carefully down towards the leather sofa, grabbing the blanket J’onn had thrown over the arm as an afterthought. She sat herself down, folding one leg beneath her before patting the empty space at her side.

Brainy followed suit, mirroring Alex’s position as he curled into his side, keeping the coffee cradled protectively against his chest. Alex smirked, smoothing the blanket over her legs before throwing the other half over Brainy’s lap. The Tower got pretty cold at night, and although Alex knew Brainy didn’t feel the cold quite like she did, she also figured he could use the comfort right about now.

When Brainy let out a soft sigh, ducking his head, she knew that her suspicions were correct.

Alex drank her coffee slowly, watching as Brainy coddled his own cup, staring listlessly into its contents.

“Tell me what you’re thinking,” Alex said softly.

Brainy glanced up at her curiously. “I am thinking several things.”

Alex rolled her eyes. “Okay, smart guy. Tell me one thing you’re thinking.”

Brainy softened at that. He pursed his lips, gritting his teeth. She watched his fingers tighten around the cup, enough to distress the surface. Then, Brainy squeezed his eyes shut, letting out a long, slow breath. “I miss her,” he murmured. “And I… I can’t stop this guilt inside my chest, like it’s eating me alive. I-I can’t rest, knowing that she’s out there, knowing that I failed her.” Brainy blinked his eyes open, looking at Alex desperately. “If Lex hadn’t had Leviathan’s power, he would have never had the opportunity to use the Phantom Zone projector in the first place. She would still be here!”

“Hey,” Alex said gently, reaching for his knee. “If you hadn’t bottled Leviathan, I wouldn’t be here. Or M’gann or J’onn, or Nia. You saved us Brainy, don’t forget that.”

Brainy’s returning smile was watery. “But knowing that does not stop it from hurting.”

“I know,” Alex murmured. “I feel that guilt, too. I keep thinking of everything I could have done differently. If I’d been quicker at shooting Lex, then maybe…” Alex sucked in a breath suddenly, feeling the burn of her own tears threatening to spill over. “I guess we’re all just trying to find a way to blame ourselves.”

Brainy glanced at her worriedly, no doubt noting the pain in her own expression. He reached out his hand, still warm from the cup, and clasped it gently over the one she had rested on his leg.

“Sharing our pain,” Brainy said slowly, his fingers clenching carefully over Alex’s. “It isn’t… fun.”

Alex smiled grimly, sidling in close enough to knock her shoulder against his. “I never said it would be,” she pointed out. “But, it’s better than going it alone.”

Alex felt Brainy sag against her then, could feel the gentle brush of his hair as he finally began to settle against her side. “Yes,” he said softly, barely forming the word around another rather intense yawn. Alex grinned, winding her arm around his back as Brainy’s eyes finally began to flutter shut. “It is.”

[wolffnichols]

do you think we’ll get a juke kiss or are we all setting ourselves up for heartache

HOPE BABE ILYSFM THANK YOU

okay so, this is an excellent question that I’ve casually seen a lot of ppl talk about but hadn’t fully paid attention too much of what they said. I think I should start with what I have seen ppl talk about, which is them being worried about Madison (Julie) being a minor and Charlie (Luke) being like 22 and not wanting her to have to be forced to kiss someone older if she doesn’t want to, especially since they’ve noted how she and Charlie would act all gross out by the thought (but I would also like to point out that they both are Team Juke and her dad is like Juke’s #1 fan.) However, from what I’ve see from Maddie and what she’s talked about, she always has her dad on set and her sister comes there a lot, and it seems like Kenny and the crew treat her really well and give her a great work environment. So it seems that she wouldn’t do anything that she would be uncomfortable with. After all, going back to what I said, she’s mentioned several times that she’s Team Juke and wants them to happen as well. Also, just like today or yesterday she posted (i think on her ig) about a gum (i think spearmint but don’t quote me on this) giving her great gum to help her in juke kissing scenes and she was gonna give it to charlie so that take as you will lol. Also, I think they all knew what they were getting into when they were casted (since they’re the main ship i can see them having a chemistry read with each other during auditions) since the Juke ship is pretty obviously a big ship in s1 (I mean they literally wrote Perfect Harmony and wanted Juke to have an epic Troy and Gabriella- eques dance and Charlie was the one who suggestion that Luke’s guitar sing to Julie so...). My conclusion? They’re both professional actors and I think they’d both be professional and okay with it, but if they’re not then I can see the show respect their wishes and do something for juke that is still natural and explores their epic romantic relationship, maybe even another epic song/dance.

Okay, now that that long explanation is out of the way, we’re gonna go with the idea that they’re both cool with it and go from there. 

Okay, tbh when I first saw the show and the final scene where they finally get to touch and they’re looking all loving into each other’s eyes with their hands placed all lovingly on each other’s faces, I totally thought that they were gonna kiss! (same goes with the last Willex scene). It makes sense that they didn’t tho since a lot was going on and Alex and Reggie were right there. But, what seems like their newfound abilities where Julie can now touch them (which means more hugs yay!!), they can actually kiss now. Yay! Which begs the question, what does this mean for their relationship since that’s now an option?

As a sidenote, tbh if it wasn’t for Luke dying bc of Caleb’s spell, i think that porch scene would’ve ended with them making their ‘interesting little relationship’ official since the episode started with Julie turning down Nick (her big crush that she had in the beginning of the season who she preseries seemed to be on crushing on forever and is an actual lifer like her) bc she didn’t think that it was fair to him since she had feelings for Luke even though she thought that nothing could happen bc of it. And then you see you her go to Luke’s parent’s house to give them Unsaid Emily bc she just wants to help him feel better bc she knows how badly that he’s hurting. And then the way he tries to hold her hand, forgetting for a moment that they can’t touch, but then says, “This is an interesting little relationship you and I have.” And they’re both so adorable looking at each other when the other isn’t looking. Also, when he said ‘there’s something I have to tell you” the way Julie was sorta standing up and down on her tippy toes and sorta looked like she was anticipating something, I feel like she was expecting Luke to officially say something about him liking her. I really think that without him dying and having to focus on trying to crossover, they might’ve started some sort of relationship even though it would’ve been different. (again she could’ve started one with Nick but refused bc she liked Luke). And that was when they couldn’t even touch. Although of course you can have a relationship without touching, from what we’ve seen between Julie and Luke, it looks like they craved each other’s touch i.e. all of her looks in Perfect Harmony and back to that porch scene where they forgot that they couldn’t touch and wanted to hold each other’s hands and the way that they looked at each other’s lips at the end of Edge of Great. So I think it’s save to say that they did wish that they could touch. 

Which leads me back to the end, where they can touch and don’t have to worry about him crossing over any time soon (since it looks like the boys will wanna stick around for a while and not look for their unfinished business anytime soon since they’d want to continue on their music career). So, with The Phantoms not going anywhere anytime soon, and all that had happened with Juke prior to that, I think it wouldn’t take long for them to try to start something, unless something stood between them. Which seems like caleb!nick could in fact put a wedge between them (especially since Nick was there to give her flowers and ‘fight for her’ as Caleb said). But even without that that wedge, I’m still kinda unsure of if Juke would officially admit their feelings to each other right after that night, or still kinda have it sorta linger in the air. 

Either way, whether they do get together pretty quickly or take their time bc of outside and internal obstacles (i.e. Nick and their own inner worries of not being sure if a lifer/ghost relationship would work) I think the show will take their time with a kiss. There’s a lot of Troyella parallels for Juke, and I can see them pull a troyella where we get almost kisses and but always get interrupted (i.e. HSM 2) up until A Big Epic Moment™ toward the end. I mean in a way, we already got something similar to that when they wanted to hold hands back in the porch scene but their hands went through bc he’s...you know...a ghost. So since we already had a scene in that similar vain, I can totally see that happening. Especially since this ship is already so agonizing like that. 

But back to your original point, I think (if the actors are okay with it ofc) we will get a kiss. Whether it’s s2 or another, I completely believe that we’re gonna get a kiss at some point. So I don’t think our hearst will break on that front (although that is valid concern given our track record with ships). However, there is also the big question of whether or not they end up together, since he is after all still a ghost (unless him and the boys become alive again at like the end which i really want to happen). But that’s a whole question for another post, and this is already super long. 

In conclusion, if the actors are okay with it, then I really think that we’re gonna get a Juke kiss (and hopefully Willex too), but I also think that they might torture us with it before it happens. 

Anyways, sorry this is so freaking long and probably doesn’t make any sense. But thank you so much Hope!! ILSYFM BABE and I absolutely LOVE talking Juke with you!! 

send me some fun asks

[noxtms]

IN CHARACTER DATE : december 9th, 2020. SYNOPSIS : the answer to the question of where is percy weasley.  TRIGGER WARNINGS : abduction & blood, torture implied. 

and the panic sets in like this : slow and brutal, tar - thick in the back of his throat when he realises that he can’t move his hands. ( it comes as a double edged sword of terror and dread ; there is nothing he can do. PERCY is acutely aware of something sliciing neat ribbons into the flesh of his wrist, of the way blood trickles lazy rivers down his hands. ) hues haven’t quite been able to focus / devoid of either contacts or the glasses he only wears when he’s alone, percy’s never felt quite this helpless before. bound to god knows what and barely able to see : he cuts a desperate, sad image. he’s too afraid of the way the noise might ricochet in the silence, the way it might snowball into a sob that’ll wrack an attenuate ribcage. god, he feels exposed.

( and despite it all, he’ll cling to ludicity : he knows that screaming, begging, yelling won’t do him any good. crying out somewhere at the back of his mind, the sickened thought : this isn’t good. someone wants you dead, and if you scream you’re more likely to die. you cannot afford your mother another dead son, another casket her frail shoulder cannot possible bear. in the face of abject misery, you resolve to stay silent / complacent in your own disappearance. that’s if they notice, what if they don’t notice, what if a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it scream --- )

somewhere, a rustle in the dark, and resolve crumbles. it can’t be helped. “please, help me, please.” 

four words & suddenly it’s a performance / mask down, lights up, camera set, action. all the world a stage and the space is now a grandstand, one that amycus intends to milk for all it’s worth. he comes to life as if it’s that note of desperation that he’s been waiting for, puppet on string. he pushes wide the door of the room the other is held in as if it took force to burst inside, his chest heaving from imagined exertion, his wand clutched too tightly as if he’s ready at any moment to defend them from unseen terror. he looks equal parts terrified & frantic, as if he doesn’t know what’s around any shadowed corner and he wants to get them out of there as quick as possible. 

of course, his steps falter immediately. a true rescuer wouldn’t hesitate to release the bonds holding the other in place, but AMYCUS holds back as if assessing a situation that needs no assessment. there’s a waver to his voice. “percy weasley. merlin’s beard... your family will be so relieved you’re alright.” he feigns a look over his shoulder, all the better for appearances. “i don’t know how much time i have...”

he’s begging. one sound from them and he’s already pleading, as if the sound in the dark is a savior, instead of specters plucked from ephilates of a tired generation. perhaps it would be a mercy to cut to the chase, but the carrow twins, well, they’re known for playing games. that’s all this is, isn’t it? their way of playing god by toying with percy like he’s little more than a plaything in the hands of spoiled children.

ALECTO lingers behind as amycus enters the room where the weasley is kept, falling into her own role. “did you find him? do you need me to come help?” her distant voice slips into the overlap of breathless apprehension and uncertain hope, the cadence of a rescuer watching for the return of the monster under the bed. languid are her movements as she paces, wand tapping across knuckles. “you have to be quick!” 

if foreboding was a tight knot in the colum of a constricted throat earlier, it’s the cold tendrils wrapped tight around flesh now. solace would’ve been a warm blossom through limbs if PERCY wasn’t so brutally aware of who his supposed rescuers are : he’s no fool. the carrows’ faces have snarled up at him from posters since his days at the ministry, and a new wave of trepidity rolls right through a quaking, bound frame. ( as hard as he tries, there’s a buoyant little squeak from the backburner / “what if they’re here to help?” he’s many things but an idiot isn’t one, he knows that no good can come of the pantomime he’s found himself embroiled in. there’s nothing resembling hope in the scene that has begun to unfold. it’s strange, really : the brunt of percy’s heartache is borne of worry for the family he’s convinced he’ll leave behind. own mortal peril is LESS of a concern than their collective grief / he wishes, in these strange moments that he’s sure will be his last, that he could apologise to molly and arthur. sorry mum, sorry dad. you deserved better than this. )

“where am i?” he’ll try to amplify the modicum of bravery that’s set into his tongue, but it wavers / intonation gives way to distress and percy sounds like a fucking child, so far removed from his near-thirty years. “how long have i been gone?” 

he’s more intelligent than they’ve given him credit for. there’s a spark of recognition in those wide, fearful eyes that couldn’t be DISGUISED if he had the forethought to try, and AMYCUS is almost colored impressed by it. the emotions rolling through him - terror, dread, uncertainty, grief - were so powerful in origin amycus had trusted in a cloud of doubt thrown over their faces, but percy weasley is not as much fool as the family name implied.

he casts a glance towards his sister, the sort they don’t need to couple with words ( it’s an old wives tale that all twins can communicate by thought, but the carrow twins are an old time terror, aren’t they ? two little children born to blood, lying awake in the dead of night and learning each other’s faces better than they knew their own ). it says he knows, even while the tiny smirk that pulls at the corner of his lips says, but we can work with that. 

“you’re just outside of swindon,” he’s turned back to the other now and his expression is back to faux care, back to something that resembles genuine concern - all it misses, now, is the added note to a purposely trembled voice. amycus abandons this, now, going for confusion above flawless PERFORMANCE. “that isn’t a detail you need concern yourself with, percy,” long enough for the questions to start, yet not long enough for the printing presses to begin churning out the missing poster. amycus does not make a show of dropping the facade, once and for all : it is simply there, and then not. “the question is how much longer you have to stay.”

the hope in his voice gives way to an ill impersonation of courage, and ALECTO finds that it sounds little more than that of a child’s mettle. her brother looks to her and she reacts with a quirk of her brow, a casual cant of her head. ( he does? how boring. ) when she steps from the penumbra cast by the empty, unlit room she was waiting in prior, she looks a touch uncanny, with cheeks just a bit too hollow and pallid skin just south of a typical color since leaving azkaban. almost normal, if not for the little things. “quite ugly place, really. don’t know why anyone would wish to come here.” words border a taunt, an almost cloying thing on her tongue. only a matter of time before they figure him gone, and she’s called to work. certainly just enough of it to begin pulling at threads, to the start of unraveling it all. she takes a step or two forward, and it’s like she clisk into something, a return to herself maybe, when she falls into place next to amycus. she plays off of him. “and how long it’s going to take your family to notice. any guesses? no?” 

it comes and goes in waves : the startling clarity that chills him right to the bone ( i am going to die at their hands i am going to die here i am going to be another tragedy upon the family name oh god mum i’m so sorry i’m so sorry- ), and then the hysteria that crowds his throat, makes him want to laugh in sheer delirium. it is altogether surreal, to feel your pulse running cold one minute and chruning something intemperate in your ears the next / PERCY weasley, alone with the carrows. fate has a funny way of rolling the dice, only to leave you stinging when you lose.

“what do you want?” ( an altogether practical question / percy’s never been one to sit around, wait it out. their histrionics do nothing for a choleric captive ; not when blood is still running thick rivulets down palms of his hands, when he’s bitton so hard at a lower lip that it too glistens crimson. there is a trace of it on his canines. he doesn’t know. ) “i don’t have anything you’re looking for, i swear.” 

AMYCUS is a predator circling prey as he moves further into the room and closer, still, to percy. alecto joins him and only near to his sister does he feel - in an odd way, confident enough - to crouch at the others level. "don't insult yourself or our intelligence," it's funny, the contrast : his expression is cold but his voice is almost velveteen, low & warm & in any other setting, any other situation, nice.

"you aren't the only person with the information that we need, percy. you're here because ronald and ginevra aren't, but don't doubt in our willingness to abandon you here, alone, and finally introduce ourselves properly to your brother... or reunite, with your sister." he smiled. again : pleasantly. if not for the context of carrow, amycus would be nothing more than a professor expressing interest in catching up with an old student. "i promise that you don't want that to happen, and to stop it, all you have to do is tell us what we want to know."

pulse throbs something fierce behind eyelids, violent underneath the sacrum of his throat, helpless in the way he cannot move. “don’t you dare touch them. don’t you dare.” ( his heart beats a little faster at the mere mention of younger siblings. all those years spent chastising, picking at them, far too overprotective and never as kind as he should’ve been : symptomatic of a love that doesn’t know vernacular confines, that only knows the kind of rage that builds an inferno behind gritted teeth when they’re referenced like that. ) clever wizard that he is, PERCY can only kick out ; nearly loses his balance, almost topples his little prison over. it’s an adrenaline rush he needs / the kickstart he needs to spit another falsehood like a loose, bloodied tooth.

“i told you, i don’t know what you want.” and to some extent, he doesn’t : captor keeps mentioning information that he doesn’t understand. “nobody told me anything.” feigned reticence suits him ; percy makes a wonderful liar, all bruises and swollen despite the way lies make his stomach twist into sailor’s knots. 

there’s a roll of dark irses, a testament to patience lost during her time in azkaban. “you’re right, how can you be so sure you don’t know without us even asking?” cadence borders something sing-songy, something sweet enough to rot. long strides bring her around his chair, where hands push down on the back, balancing what he had almost thrown askew. the legs are strident when they return to hardwood floor. percy’s boxed in by them both, now, and though wands aren’t drawn, they don’t need to be to prove a point. “it’s easy, percy. where is harry potter? his body, his things...” ALECTO paints an almost innocent picture with wide eyes and relaxed posture as she lingers over his shoulder. “and a little tip --- we don’t take too well to being lied to. my ideal day may not be spending time with the most boring, self righteous weasley, but like amycus said, we can just as easily go to one of the other, hm, is it six of you now?” 

and the thing is, every fivre of an aching being is straining against this ! the hard line of a jaw is stiff with muscle, and yet it happens anyway : in light of alecto carrow lingering over his shoulder, circling like a vulture, PERCY laughs. it’s entirely humourless, dry and barked into atmosphere so tense you could carve it, but it happens. ( for what it’s worth he regrets it immediately / urge to be violently sick follows it, but he’s able to swallow that one down. )

“you think they told me where his body was? jesus fucking christ,” ( muggle london has fouled up that mouth --- ) “you can’t possible think they told me that.” hysteria is a slow bloom that’s spreading through blood and bone alike, deadly in the way it seems determined to swallow him whole. “every bit as fucking daft as she is, you two, thinking they told me anything. fuck.”

percy knows the price, knows it intimately before he’s even spoken. you don’t leave something like this unscathed, something like this without the battle scars to prove it. he knows, deep in marrow, that he isn’t leaving this alive. shaking, terrified, quaking with nothing but sheer fury, he steels himself for the bloe before it even arrives. this is what happens when you lie, when you laugh. this is what happens, and so it goes. 

the carrow twins move deliberately. they move as one. where one pushes the other pulls ( like opposing magnets, still connected in some indescribable way ), always compensating for the other on little more than blood instinct. alecto crosses to steady percy and amycus - in what is almost bored glory - rises, only then, to his full height. she leans left, he takes a step right. she focuses upon their charge, AMYCUS allows his attention to float. he undoes the buttons of his sleeves, both rolled up slowly to expose arms that are mottled by stark white scars & marred by one recognisable tattoo.

"percy, percy, percy," he clucked his tongue, caught between chilling disapproval & aching disappointment. there's a reason that he keeps using his name, as if they're old friends caught in something neither can control : a power to claiming it, an added threat. "we already know of the boys connection to your blood traitorous family. all those summers spent under the same roof, one more child for your overworked mother to wrangle... of course you know where he is. your family loved him."

"i'm sorry, percy. i know you'll tell us what we want to hear-" he sighs. gaze flickers towards his sister, an almost imperceptible jut of his chin given to urge her to stand away from the seated boy, and from his back pocket is pulled a wand that is, even without brandishing, a threat. "but we did tell you not to lie." the striking of a snake : predator meet prey.

with the reverent uttering of "crucio," amycus' wand slashes downwards.

[acourtofhopeanddreams]

A Prince of Royal Blood

Inspired by Braids of Silver by Laura Greenwood

Princess Sansa Stark is in tears. Just when she was about to tell her parents that she had fallen in love with Jon Snow they tell her they officially invited all the princes of royal blood for her prince trials. And Jon Snow is many things, but he is not of royal blood, is he?

Royal AU // Hidden Royalty // Prince Trials

One last goodbye

“Jon!” Sansa wrapped her arms around his broad shoulders and buried her face in his neck. Salted tears dripped on his white shirt and a little reluctantly he embraced her and pressed her as tight to him as possible.

Usually these meetings in the woods were the highlight of both their weeks. For her it was an escape from court, no matter how much she enjoyed the gossiping and the balls. For him it was the only time someone was actually seeing him as the guy he could have been.

“San…” Jon pressed a soft kiss on her hair. “What’s wrong?”

“Everything!” She looked up at him with red and swollen eyes. “I don’t know what to do!”

If Sansa didn’t know what to do, how could he ever know what to do? And so he held her. He rocked her in his arms. He pressed more soft kisses to her forehead and hair. And he most of all waited patiently until she was ready to tell him more.

“They want me to marry!” The blue of her eyes had never been as vibrant as now, when she looked at him with wide open eyes. “And it has to be someone with royal blood.” She swallowed. “I wanted to tell them about you. I wanted to tell them that I wanted to marry you, but they’ve already sent the invitations to all the royal families in Westeros.”

Jon wasn’t the kind of guy to cry. He had grown up in an orphanage with barely enough food on the table and daily fights for comfortable sleeping spaces and sips of water. He had worked the rest of his life in dirty stables, never allowed to get anywhere near the horses and the more interesting jobs. But now, now the only really good thing that had ever happened to him was about to be taken away from him, he felt his eyes burning and stinging.

“It’s gonna be a competition. Every man with royal blood can sign up and whoever wins will get my hand.”

Jon furrowed his eyebrows. “And you’ve got no say in it?” He tensed all his muscles.

“The tests will make sure he’s a good man. Brave and gentle and strong.” She sniffed. Strands of her hair had come loose and framed her angelic face. “But I don’t want someone brave and gentle and strong. I want you!” She locked her glance with his.

“Is there no way I can sign up?” Jon placed his hands firmly on her shoulders. He wasn’t sure if he was the right man for Sansa. He was even less sure if he was the kind of man her parents wanted for her. But he wasn’t gonna let her go without a fight either. He had to at least try.

Sansa shook her head. “They test everyone’s blood. If it’s not royal, you will be sent away.”

“Will I be punished if I try?” He was only a simple orphan. A stable boy. But there would probably be countless of men trying. Why couldn’t he?

She shrugged. “I don’t think father feels like beheading half of his male population because they want to marry his daughter.”

“Then I will try.” Jon spoke firmly, but Sansa smiled while she bent her head.

“It won’t change anything…” She sighed. The palm of her hand felt warm and sweaty when she pressed it to his stubbled cheek. “You don’t have royal blood, so you won’t get in. All of this will be over. No more picnics while it’s pouring rain. No more swims in the ice cold lake when the sun is burning our skin. No more stolen kisses and tender embraces.”

Jon’s heart raced in his chest. He knew that all of this had to end at some point. He knew that one day she would marry a handsome and rich prince and he would go on his way with memories and a heartache. But he was no prepared to see her this broken.

Sansa was always fierce. She always walked with her back straight and her chin up. She had a solution for every problem and whenever she discovered that something was impossible she simply found another way. If she was defeated, if she couldn’t see how they would change their fate, how could he ever have hope?

“If this is our last afternoon together…” Jon cleared his throat. “We shouldn’t waste it.” He tucked a strand of her red hair behind her ear and then his lips brushed hers.

The rest of the afternoon they talked. They kissed. They held each other and made love in the deserted meadow. They both tried to forget that this was their last afternoon and yet they both made sure to store every little detail away into their memories.

The tips of his fingers touched every curve of her body. His lips and tongue kissed every bit of naked skin. His eyes focussed on her bright blue eyes, staring at him as if he was her world and her world would start crumbling the moment he left. He held his breath while her hands roamed over his body. While her mouth explored every sensitive part of him he forced to keep his eyes open. And when she nestled herself satisfied in his strong arms he wished he could freeze this moment, right here, right now.

But then the sun set. They had almost missed it at first, they had most of all denied it at first, but when they were unmistakably surrounded by twilight they couldn’t run away any longer.

“I have to go…” Sansa whispered. “Mom and dad will sent men to look for me and I don’t want  them to find us like this.” She pushed herself up and her eyes reflected the last rays of sunshine. “Whatever happens…” She reached for her clothes and started to dress herself while Jon couldn’t move. “You will always be the only man I’ve ever truly loved.” She smiled at him.

The tears on her cheeks had dried. Her eyes were no longer puffy and red and swollen. But the weight on her shoulders was unmistakably still there.

“I’ll never love someone else.” Jon eventually stood up too. “If I can’t have you, I won’t have anyone.”

Sansa shook her head. “Don’t promise me that, Jon.” She cupped his face one more time. “How can I ever be happy if I know that you will be out there waiting for me for the rest of your life?” She kissed his lips and he made sure to memorize her taste too. “There is another girl for you out there, somewhere. Promise me that once I am married, you will go find her and will fall madly in love with her.”

He couldn’t promise her that. He didn’t want to promise her that and yet he nodded, knowing that letting her go was the only good thing he had left to give her. “Be happy.” He embraced her one more time and then it was time to let her go.

“I will if you will.” Sansa walked away, back to the main road, to the horse that would bring her home, to her castle, to her family and to the prince who would be lucky enough to win her hand and hopefully her heart.

One desperate attempt

Pearls of sweat covered his forehead. His black curls sticked to his face and sand and dirt covered his clothes.

“Jon!”

He didn’t look up from the box he was cleaning when Sam walked in.

“Are you coming?”

Normally he joined them when they visited the nearby tavern to drink ale and talk about women they could never have. But he was counting down the days until he would tell the stable master that he would leave. He didn’t need to make friends anymore. As soon as Sansa had her husband he would leave this place and would never come back.

“It’s the last day to sign up from the prince trials.”

Abruptly he looked up. “You’re not gonna sign up, are you?” A chuckle escaped.

“Well, Edd says we can always try.” Sam smiled. “Every guy in the village has tried. You never know, right?”

Jon swallowed. He had promised Sansa that he would try. He had promised her that he would get his blood tested. But why would he do that? He was an orphan! Who dumped a baby prince in an orphanage?

“Don’t you want to know if you don’t have royal blood secretly?”

Another chuckle escaped. “If we’d have royal blood, we wouldn’t be cleaning stables.” Jon shook his head. “But fine. Why don’t we go and make fools of ourselves?” He put all his stuff away. “Go get the horses ready and give me a second to get changed.”

A few minutes later he wore a set of clean clothes. He didn’t know why, but he had searched for his best shirt and his best pants. He had even splashed some water over his shoes to get rid of the worst of the dirt.

“Look at you.” Edd grinned. “Don’t you look pretty all dressed up.”

Jon felt his cheeks heating up, but he didn’t comment while he climbed on the horse he had always considered his. With one brisk movement he forced his horse forward. The sooner this humiliation would be over, the sooner he could start saying goodbye for good.

The line of young men at the market square was hard to miss. Sam hadn’t been exaggerating when he said that every men in the village was determined to grab his chance to find out if there really wasn’t a drop of royal blood in their veins.

“Are we really gonna waste our entire afternoon standing in the burning sun?” He watched one man after the other walk away with his head bowed down in shame.

“Yes, we are.” Edd pushed him to the back of the line. “What do we have to lose? We’re scum anyway. It can’t get any worse.”

And yet Jon felt his heart racing in his chest, speeding up the closer they came to the very front where important looking people were piercing fingertips with sharp needles.

His palms started sweating when there were still twenty people in front of him.

When there were only ten men between him and the table his chest moved up and down that rapidly that Sam grabbed his wrist in an attempt to calm him down.

“You guys go first.” Jon nodded at Edd and Sam when it was finally their turn.

With a shrug of their shoulders they offered the official their fingers. They didn’t wince when the needle pricked them. They even smiled when the official shook his head to confirm for once and for all that they would never be more than stable boys.

“Are you coming forward or what?”

Jon looked up and saw how the elder guy shifted his weight and gestured with his fingers for him to come forward.

“There are more men behind you. It’s now or never. Either you come forward and get tested or you leave now.”

Jon bit his lip. Nothing would change if the official would shake his head after examining his drop of blood. He would still be the stable boy who had some amazing moments with the princess, but couldn’t marry her in the end. But everything would change if, as some sort of miracle, the official would see something, something not even Jon knew was there.

He was an orphan. He didn’t know who his father was. He had never slept in the arms of his mother. Everything was possible.

“What’s the matter, Jon? Afraid you are a prince and will have to compete?” Edd laughed and the men standing behind them in line laughed along. “Come one, get it over with so we can have a few ales and laugh about our tries.”

As if there was enough ale in the world to drown in once every last little bit of hope would be shattered.

Jon stepped forward and held out his hand. His fingers were calloused and the official had to try a few times before the needle finally pierced his skin. Jon barely felt the sting. His heart hurt way too much already for a small prick to bother him. And yet he held his breath when the drop of blood welled up on top of his finger. He didn’t dare to exhale while the official looked at the blood carefully.

In a few more seconds he would shake his head.

“Mister…” The official looked up at Jon.

“Snow, Jon Snow.” He cleared his dry throat.

“Will you come with me for a closer inspection?” The official gestured to the white tent behind the wooden table. “I saw something irregular in your blood.”

Could it be?

Jon didn’t dare to hope, but with a little more hope in his steps he followed the elder man to the secrecy of the tent. He ignored the whispers of all the other gathered men. He even ignored Edd and Sam trying to ask him what was wrong.

“Please, sit down.”

Jon sat down in a wooden chair.

“I will try to be careful, considering the tests in the upcoming days, but I do need a little more blood.” The man reached for Jon’s hand and with a sharp knife he cut his palm.

But Jon was still incapable of feeling pain. Adrenaline was rushing through his veins. He didn’t dare to hope. He didn’t dare to believe that maybe, just maybe he could try and win her hand. That maybe, just maybe for once in his life something would go the way he wanted.

“Jon Snow?” The official looked up. “Congratulations. You are a prince and are hereby allowed to compete for Princess Sansa’s hand in marriage.”

Jon blinked a few times. Had he heard that right? He was a prince? He could compete? A huge smile spread across his face and he jumped up. It took every bit of self control to not wrap his arms around the official and peck his cheek. It took even more self control to not scream that he was gonna marry princess Sansa and that there was absolutely nothing in his way anymore.

Apart from a competition. And a lot of other princes.

But if somehow he could have royal blood in his veins, he didn’t doubt that somehow he would find a way to win this.

One happily ever after

“I present you…”

The palm of his hand was sweating, even though he was holding hers as firmly as he could. He had her. He truly had her. And he swore her and himself that he would never ever let her go again.

“Princess Sansa Stark…”

She looked at him with a huge smile on her face. She had always been beautiful. She had been beautiful covered in grass, surrounded by water or naked in his arms. And yet he had never seen her more beautiful than right now.

“And her betrothed…”

He wouldn’t say the competition had been easy. He wouldn’t say he had never been afraid to be eliminated, like so many others. He wouldn’t say he had never been terrified to fail a test or to make a fool of himself.

But every time he had looked at the other princes he had known that he was the only one fighting for love. He was the only one knowing that the princess rooted for him. He was the only one who had something to lose. Losing hadn’t been an option.

So he had barely slept, using every spare minute to practice and learn. He had given everything he had to give and a little more. He had learned new skills and customs. He had called in every favor of everyone he had ever known.

All this time he had known that if Edd and Sam hadn’t forced him to get his blood tested, he wouldn’t have been here. And all this time he had realized that he owed Sansa more than that. He had promised to fight for her. He almost hadn’t done so, but he had made up for it.

“Prince Jon Snow!”

He wore clothes more expansive than everything he had over owned combined. His new shoes were not only clean, but they were carefully polished and blinking. He still didn’t always know how to behave, how to talk and how to smile.

It didn’t matter.

He had the rest of his life to learn from the best, the woman at his side.

Sansa beamed while they walked down the stairs into the throne room. Her beautiful pink dress swirled around her legs. In her red hair a silver tiara blinked in the light of a million burning candles.

Jon almost couldn’t focus on his own steps, but the fear of tripping over his own feet in front of the entire royal family and all the gathered noblemen conquered his urge to keep on looking at the beautiful woman who would really be his wife.

Eddard Stark and his wife Catelyn stood in front of the crowd, surrounded by their children. Arya, the younger sister he had befriended during the last few weeks, was clapping her hands and not even Robb Stark, who already treated him as a brother, attempted to stop her.

Behind them stood the princes who lost. Most of them would simply compete in the trial for another princess and, if they wouldn’t win that trial either, also in the ones after that.

Joffrey Baratheon, crown prince of King’s landing, had threatened not to come and still wore the disgust visible on his face. He had tried to play dirty, but unlike the tricks of Ramsay Bolton, who was now rotting away in the cells of Winterfell, Joffrey’s attempts to ridge the game had not resulted in severe casualties.

Theon Greyjoy, crown prince of the Iron Isles and probably the only other man who had wanted Sansa for more than just her title and beauty, nodded encouragingly at Jon. He was the only one who had stepped away from the game when he noticed how much Sansa loved Jon and the other way round.

Once their feet safely reached the dance floor the orchestra in the corner of the throne room started playing.

Jon always thought that dancing wasn’t his strongest suit, until he discovered that he could do everything as long as it was with her. In one smooth movement he twirled her towards him and they smiled when they heard the audience gasp.

“And here I thought we would never make another memory together.” Sansa placed a hand on his chest. “Who could have thought that all of the memories we already had were only the beginning?”

Jon smiled when he carefully guided her through the steps they had practiced for hours. “Who could have thought that I was a prince?”

“Do you want to know who your parents are?” Sansa cocked her head. She looked graceful and even though she was clearly focussing on anything but her steps she didn’t miss a beat. “Would you want to find your family?”

The last couple of weeks he had asked himself that same question over and over. He still wasn’t sure. It wouldn’t change his childhood. And yet he wondered why someone would leave a prince in an orphanage without letting anyone know who he was. But what if they had left him there to protect him? What if going after his parentage would put him, and Sansa, in danger?

He smiled. “I wanna focus on our wedding first.” He pulled Sansa a littler closer towards him, even though it was not considered appropriate by the etiquettes they had taught him. “I never had a family. Now I’m gonna be part of yours.” His nose brushed hers. “One step at a time.”

Sansa chuckled. “My family can be quite overwhelming at times, but I promise they mean well.” She locked her glance with his. “Especially Arya seems to like you.”

Jon rolled his eyes. “No, she likes me because I’m even worse at being a royal than she is.”

“Who knows.” Sansa glanced at her sister before she looked but at Jon. “In a few years she will be old enough for her own prince trials.” She bit her lip. “She might find her own hidden prince.”

“As if this will happen again.”

Sansa shrugged. “If our story has proven one thing, it’s that you should never give up before the game is played.”

Jon swallowed. “I almost did.” He licked his lips. “I didn’t even want to get my blood tested.” He sighed. “If one day I would have found out I had royal blood and could have competed…”

Sansa pressed a finger to his lips. “It doesn’t matter anymore. You did get your blood tested and you did win the competition and you will become my husband.” She quickly pecked his lips. “And we will get our happily ever after.”

“Careful, San.” Jon whispered. “We’re not married yet. If we don’t behave your parents can still cast me out.”

Sansa shook her head. “They can try. But if they cast you out, I will leave this palace with you and go wherever they are happy to have us. Together.”

Jon smiled. “You have no idea how much I love you.”

“I do, but I still love you more.”

He wasn’t so sure about that. He wasn’t sure it was even possible. He really would never ever let her go again.

[lia-jones]

Growing Stronger - Chapter Thirty-Four - Leave Me As Usual

Author’s Note: Hello beautiful people! Thanks to @muart0113​, our super talented artist, you are in for a treat! This chapter has some exquisite art, made by our sweet Mu! Thank you, gorgeous Mu, for your immense support and love for the Growing Universe. People like you fuel my inspiration, and are the ones that keep me going when things get a little bit harder!

Victor let out a deep breath, watching it turn into condensation in the frosty morning air. Not even the cold weather would make him give up on his morning run. It was his alone time, when he dealt with all the feelings he had to put aside in his daily life. And that morning, he definitely needed to clear his head.

He took the first step with conviction, and soon he was increasing the pace, making his heart race as much as his head. She had said she wanted to be done with the wedding, that she felt like she didn’t fit in his life. Even if Andrea didn’t know it yet, he did; she was giving up. She was slowly retreating from his life. And he had no idea what to do.

What could he do? The uncertainty of the future was driving him insane. He set his personal feelings aside for a moment, building a scenario analysis in his mind. Base case scenario, he would get married, there would still be issues, but those could be dealt with in the long run. He would support her every step of the way and shower her with love, and eventually, she would understand he could and would make her happy. Best case scenario, they would solve said issues before the wedding. Some miraculous event would make her less busy, she would engage happily and effortlessly in all wedding-related activities, and she would be happy, knowing he would make her happy.

Worst case scenario... Victor sighed, he never liked this part. But one must be prepared for all situations, no matter how painful said situation is. Worst case scenario, she would leave him. She would conclude she didn’t want the life he had to offer, that Levi or any other guy was a better match, and she would leave him. He would be alone.

The next part of the scenario analysis entailed the steps for recuperation, should the worst case scenario occur.

Step number one, he would have to communicate the end of the engagement to all of his guests. Approximately three hundred and seventy out of four hundred. He would make a bland speech about incompatibility and different life goals, trying to protect Andrea’s image at all costs. He wouldn’t let people think poorly of her. If anything, they should think poorly of him. He was the one that failed miserably

Step number two, he would have to cancel all the services for the wedding. Florist, band, wedding planner. He would have to cancel the construction of the large structure he was building in his aunt’s land. He would have Goldman do all that.

Step number three, he would have to control the media. He would assign that task to Mia, with the crystal clear instruction to leave Andrea out of the confusion as much as possible. After that poor excuse of a boyfriend, and seeing her name slandered on the media because of her abuse, he wouldn’t allow her to be unwillingly involved. Andrea should be able to continue her life as if nothing happened. Everything should fall on him.

Step number four, he had to prepare for his father’s lecture. Victor wasn’t expecting any support from him, already guessing the main topics of his speech: he was a fool in love, how could he so easily let these filthy people into his life, his mother would be ashamed of him. Victor would listen to it all and wonder if, this time, his father was right. He could already feel the shame.

Step number five, and this was one Victor was certain of: he would close his heart forever. He would never love ever again. He had found the love of his life, only to see her walk away and break his heart. And he would not allow it to happen ever again.

Victor stopped dead on his tracks, realizing he had gone much further than his usual route. Sighing heavily, he returned home. He now had a backup plan, but he wished he didn’t have to use it. He was prepared for the circumstances, but no plan could prepare him for the heartache.

He entered the apartment, a delicious smell coming from the kitchen grabbing his attention. Andrea was cooking breakfast.

“Victor!” Out of the blue, she jumped into his arms and kissed him, almost toppling them to the ground. The weight he felt in his heart was immediately lifted with her affection.

“I’m covered in sweat.” He warned softly, as she broke the kiss, stroking his cheek. ”What happened?”

“It’s done!” She beamed at him. “I finally finished it! I’m publishing the first half of the study tomorrow morning.”

“It’s done?” Victor could barely believe it. The miraculous event had taken place after all. With the study out of her mind, she could finally focus on them, and the wedding.

“Finally!” Her eyes sparkled with joy, it had been months since Victor had seen that light in her eyes. “I feel like I could cry! I can finally breathe, I can finally relax. No more calls, no more late-night hours working, I can finally have a life!”

Victor squeezed her soft body against his chest. He felt like he could cry as well. However, he had something else in mind.

“That’s definitely worth celebrating.” His voice was low and sensual, as his lips touched her neck. “Let’s go get ourselves clean.” He carried her towards the bathroom, her legs still tightly wrapped around his waist.

“While getting ourselves dirty?” She asked in a sultry voice, hot and moist against his ear.

“Something along those lines.” He smirked, looking forward to the intimacy.

It had been a long time since they last had sex. He loved her intensely, made her lose her mind countless times, allowing himself to get lost in her, as the fog and warm water enveloped them, intensifying their senses. He tasted, kissed, caressed every inch of her skin, until his lustful hunger was completely satiated and she was pliant in his arms, her body soft with pleasure and exhaustion. He didn’t care if they would be late. She was his top priority.

“Now that the study is done, I assume you’re less busy today?” He asked while he ate the delicious frittata she had prepared for breakfast.

“Yes, I’m waiting for a printed version of the study to review. After that, I’m free.” She happily sipped her coffee. Andrea always looked beautiful after sex, her cheeks a beautiful pink, her complexion glowing. “What do you have in mind?”

“We could visit my aunt’s ranch this afternoon and see how the construction is going. Maybe stay for dinner. Mina would love to see you again.”

“Sounds wonderful.” The doorbell rang. Andrea got up to get it.

She returned with a wide smile on her face, holding a folder.

“And here it is, the fruit of my labor.” She opened the folder as she finished her coffee. “Oh no, that can’t be right.” She frowned, as she read some documents. “Hand me that pen, will you?”

And just like that, she was gone, totally engrossed in the folder in front of her, frowning and shaking her head as she read.

“Did I lose you already?” Victor asked softly.

“Sure. Just text me in case I forget.” She answered, absentmindedly, eyes fixed on paper.

Victor held her face gently, kissing her temple.

“I’ll call you later. You’re not listening anyway.”

She seemed to realize she had been distracted, glancing at him with worried eyes.

“I’m sorry, got lost a bit here.” She grimaced, and he chuckled. “Can I call you after I sort this out? It’s really urgent.”

“I’ll be waiting.” He gave her a warm smile. “Enjoy your day.”

He walked in LFG in a much better mood. What was he thinking, considering a breakup? In retrospect, it almost sounded silly.

An hour later, he got a text from her.

I’m sorry, I can’t make it today. Something came up, I need to solve it as soon as possible. Can we reschedule for tomorrow? Love you.

Probably something to do with the mistakes she saw that morning. If the study was to be published the following day, it was only natural that she would need to fix it promptly. He replied with a smile.

It can be rescheduled. In the meantime, I will prepare a list of things you should do as compensation. Be prepared. I love you.

Probably for the best, he thought. He had no shortage of things that were demanding his immediate attention, and maybe the next day they could take the day off, maybe have another picnic. He should call Mina to make arrangements.

It was later afternoon when he called Goldman, looking for his assistant’s wife. One of her clients had an accident that resulted in millions worth of damage, and Victor needed to know how much the insurance would cover, and how much that would cost LFG.

“Diane took the afternoon off, she’s out with Andrea somewhere. But she told me she emailed you the last report.”

Diane’s report was the furthest thing from Victor’s mind.

“You said Diane is with Andrea? Right this moment?” He felt an icy sensation in the pit of his stomach.

“Shouldn’t she be? She… She left after lunch.” Goldman looked confused. “Is everything ok? You look pale.”

“Everything is fine.” Victor cleared his throat, closing the laptop and getting up from his chair. “I’m done for today. My phone will be off, call me at home in case of emergency only.”

“Are you sure you are ok to drive, you don’t seem-” Goldman fussed.

“Mind your own business, you have work to do. Like I said, I am fine.” And with that, Victor stormed off. He couldn’t bear talking to anyone at that moment, let alone someone that could read him so well.

Andrea had lied. Andrea never lied, something was seriously wrong. The ice in Victor’s stomach soon grew into a frigid wall. He was nursing a glass of brandy, hoping the frost in his heart would cool the fire in his blood, when Andrea came home.

“How was work?” He couldn’t avoid the irritation creeping into his voice.

“It was fine.” She didn’t look him in the eyes, taking her jacket off and leaving to hang it in the closet. “How was your day?”

Victor was done with idle conversation. He followed Andrea to the hall, ready for confrontation.

“Now you lie to me?”

Andrea’s shoulders tensed, her back turned to him.

“Victor…” She turned to him with a worried expression.

“Do you even want to get married?” Victor threw at her.

He turned to the living room, not wanting to explode right there in the hallway. Part of him wanted to confront her, wanted to demand justice for being wronged and deceived, to make her see how much she hurt him, how a simple lie left his heart torn and aching. Another part of him knew that this would lead to nothing pleasant, and it would just be the beginning of the end. The final confrontation. Although he understood that some things can’t be helped or avoided, that one should just face it and move past them, Victor also wanted to hold on to those last minutes with her, and pretend for a while things could still be saved.

“Victor, listen…” She followed him to the living room.

“I have been more than patient, Andrea.” Victor tried to hide the hurt and fury in his voice, but found he couldn’t. “I know the University has been putting a great amount of pressure on you, and I have given you time, and space. I have respected that. But you have been using it as an excuse to avoid me. You lied to me, Andrea.” Victor looked her straight in the eyes. No matter how painful it would be, she would tell him the truth. “Just admit it, this is over for you, isn’t it? You don’t want to get married.”

“Wait, that’s not fair!” Andrea raised her voice, although the hurt was more visible than the rage. “You know how hard I worked for this, you know I can’t just let it go down the drain! This is my career, I fought very hard for it!”

“What about ME? Why won’t you fight for me? Am I that forgettable?!” His voice came like a roar, echoing in the apartment, surprising him with its force.

The pain inside him was suddenly so unbearable he felt weak in the knees, having to sit on the leather sofa to steady himself, a tear escaping his eyes. Her silence, on the other hand, was deafening, making his ears ring. She said nothing, tears rolling down her face, as she turned her back on him and left, returning a moment after, her eyes full of rage.

“I am doing the very best I can. I’m sorry that’s not good enough for you.” She threw a piece of paper at him, walking away again.

Victor picked up the paper from the floor. It was stamped with that day’s date, from one of the designers he picked for Andrea. It was a receipt for a dress fitting.

The dagger in his heart dug so deep he let out a silent sob. That’s why Diane was with her, that’s why she didn’t say anything about it. She went to the designer to try on her wedding dress. Their relationship was already so fragile, and he managed to completely destroy it with a single blow.

He wanted to get up and follow her into the bedroom, apologize, admit what a big idiot he was, but he couldn’t. The ice around his heart had spread to his veins and froze his muscles in place, restraining his movements. Besides, he knew what she was doing in their bedroom. She was packing. She was getting ready to leave. At that moment, Victor was nothing more than a helpless spectator, watching his dream crumble to the ground, unable to act, unable to stop it. The only thing he could do was pick up the pieces.

He sighed, resigned, as he heard her come into the room again.

“I’m sorry-” She started. He already knew what was coming. He couldn’t bear to hear it.

“I’ll inform the guests that the wedding is canceled. You talk to your family. You don’t need to mind any expenses that were already made, all of those are on me.” His voice was monotonous and detached, hiding the fact that his heart was beating wildly inside his chest.

“Victor…”

“No!” He closed his eyes, another tear escaping them, betraying him. Before she could say anything else, he continued. “Take your time getting your things out of the house, I will stay in a hotel and go on some business trips I have been postponing. I will also withdraw my funding from your study, so you won’t have to see me again.” His voice started shaking, he wanted to cry so much, but he refused. “You have plenty of people that believe in your work. You don’t need me.”

Victor remembered his childhood, and how quickly he was dismissed by his own parents. They loved the idea of having a son, an heir, but they didn’t love him , not truly. All his life, he had been alone, so alone it was hard to picture himself any other way. He was a powerful man in his professional life, but at the same time, in his private one, he was invisible, insignificant. Everybody always wondered why he didn’t have any friends, or close relatives, or a wife, thinking that it was his fault, for keeping people at bay. But the truth was, no matter how hard he tried, no one cared enough to stay. And eventually, he stopped trying.

“In the end, it’s always the same.” He spoke, more to himself than to her. “I was a fool to believe this would be any different. Everybody leaves, every single time. And I’m left alone.”

Andrea suddenly kneeled before him, taking his hands. He was so numb he could barely feel her touch. He kept his head down, afraid to face her.

“You are not alone.” She held his hands tighter. “I’m here. I’m not going anywhere, Victor. I will never leave you.”

“Forget it. “He shook his head. “Maybe you’re right.” His voice was so strained he could barely speak. “Maybe when things are too hard, it just means they are supposed to end.”

“Fuck that.” There was a strong determination in her voice and her touch, as she lifted his head to make him face her. “Look, I know right now you are building a wall between us, I can feel it. But if you ever loved me, if the love you said you felt for me was ever true, you’ll bring it down for a minute and listen.”

He watched her closely and skeptically as she spoke.

“I was wrong when I said that. Things that matter sometimes are hard, but we don’t give up on them, because they are precious to us. They are worth every fight, they are worth every struggle, and sometimes we will stumble and do the wrong thing, but we keep going, you know why? Because they are so rare, so unique that we refuse to give up.”

Victor shook his head in disbelief. Yes, that could be true for most people, but not for them.

“Just give up, Andrea, just leave. It wasn’t hard for you before, I’m certain you can do it again. You have proven to be capable of leading a happy life without me, go and find your happiness.  There is no point in wasting time with foolish delusions. You were right to leave me the first time.”

Andrea looked at him with a scary determination in her eyes.

“No, I won’t. Not until you look me in the eye and tell me you want me out of your life.”

He felt his bad blood rising again. He did not like being defied like that.

“Fine.” He scoffed. “I’ll go.”

He should’ve known. He should’ve guessed that Andrea would never relent when she set her mind on something. Before he could reach the door she was already there, leaning against it, blocking it.

“No.” She spoke like it was obvious she wouldn’t let him leave. “Not until we figure this out.”

Victor’s mind was reeling, he couldn’t understand why she was doing this. Wasn’t she the one that said she did not fit in his life? Wasn’t she the one that kept avoiding him, neglecting him? Wasn’t she the one that was supposed to be upset? He had been an idiot, accusing her of lying to him when actually all she wanted was to surprise him? Why was she pushing him around, wanting to make things better again, when she was the one that showed intentions of leaving in the first place?

Why? Why was she fighting if the obvious choice would be to leave, like everybody did?

“Why are you doing this?” Despite his best efforts, tears filled his eyes, revealing how hurt he was.

“Because this happened before, and I left. And there is not a day that I don’t regret it. You think I was happy? I was trying to survive.” She moved to be in front of him, leaving the door clear, a sad look in her eyes. “Do as you must, I don’t want to force you into doing anything. But know this: I won’t be happy. I will never find bliss. And I won’t find anyone else, because nobody else is you.”

The wisest action would be to leave. It had been established that this wouldn’t work, not because he didn’t love her, but because he obviously couldn’t make her happy. An honorable man would probably leave, do the painful thing, sacrifice his happiness for hers. But Victor was weak, selfish. He wanted to stay, he wanted to hold her, kiss her, love her, end the fight. Try again, even if just for the sake of another moment with her. Victor couldn’t move.

She pulled him down and leaned her forehead against his, making his heart beat harder. “You are the love of my life, you always will be. Yes, I could leave, but where would I go? You are my life. Why is it so hard for you to believe that?”

The moment her lips touched his, Victor lost it. He kissed her back with passion, but more than that, with hunger, as he was craving the love she was giving him to soothe his aching heart. He took her in his arms and lifted her up, sitting her on the end table of the hallway, his body pinning her against the wall, his arms trapping her. And she was holding him back, caressing him, nurturing him, giving him the affection he had always dreamed of. When they broke the kiss, he held her tight. The fear of losing her was stronger than ever.

“I don’t want to let you go.” He confessed, nuzzling her neck.

“Then don’t.” She tightened the embrace, and he noticed she was shaking slightly. Guilt weighed in his heart for scaring her like that.

Slowly, he slackened the embrace to look her in the eyes, his nose touching hers, his ragged breath mixing with hers.

“I’m sorry.” They said in unison. Andrea pecked his nose, smiling at him lovingly.

“No, I’m sorry, Victor, this is mostly my fault. I know I have been a mess, and yes, you have been very patient with me. I have been feeling such pressure from so many people I unwillingly disregarded the only one that was actually trying to give me some relief. I’m sorry if I made you feel like I didn’t care. I want this to work. Can we work this out?”

“Yes.” His voice was shaky, but his heart felt warmer.

“I love you, Victor.” She smiled at him. “Will you marry me, and build a life with me?”

He wanted nothing more in this world. To have the woman he loved in his arms, to create a life for himself that would be completely different from the one he had before, one where he wouldn’t be alone and invisible. Her words made the warmth spread in him, like light flooding a dark room.

“Yes.” He smiled, his lips touching hers, asking for a kiss.

[gamebunny-advance]

Huh

I started writing a script for another NSR comic about 1010, but it just got kinda sad and writing it is bumming me out. It’s not finished, but I sunk too much time into it for me to just throw it out. This isn’t fanfic, it’s an unedited comic script and is almost entirely dialogue. It really doesn’t read well, but maybe y’all will get something out of my ramblings anyway.

Note: The script calls them by their hair colors, but they refer to each other by a number: White=1, Red=2, Blue=3, Yellow=4, Green=5. Neon J refers to them by the fanon names.

(It's a peaceful afternoon. 1010 is taking a break in a rec room in the Barrac Mansion. Green is slumped over on an exercise ball. Yellow is laid down next to Green. White and Red are playing cards. Blue is reading a book.)

Green: So, are we supposed to be brothers, or are we just 5 guys who live in the same house? White: If it wasn't programmed into us, then it doesn't matter. Yellow: Yeah, why are you worried about that anyway Number 5?

(Green has a flashback of coming face-to-face with another Green 1010)

Green: The other day I ran into one of my duplicates. When I looked at it, I thought, "this is me" and just went about my day, but when I look at you guys I think, "this is not me" and that's it. It's weird that something like that is so vague in our memory. Yellow: You do have a point. All that's programmed is that we're all "1010", but I guess that could mean anything. White: Let's just drop it. Knowing that isn't going to change anything. Green: True, but I think it'd be fun to talk about. Red: Sure, I'll bite. Since we're made by the same person, then we'd be brothers right? White: You wouldn't call a fridge and a toaster "brothers" just because they're from the same manufacturer, would you? Blue: I wouldn't call those related at all, but we're all in the same series, so we're obviously supposed to be a set. We might as well be brothers at that point. White: Being a set doesn't make us brothers. A set of cards all belong together, but they're not all the same. Cards can share numbers and suits...

(White picks out the Joker from his hand of cards.)

White: ...or nothing at all.

Green: Why do you keep comparing us to "things". I know we're not "human", but we're still people man. People work differently from "things". White: We are what we are and what we are is manufactured. We can't apply "human" logic to our situation. Blue: Are you alright Number 1? You've been acting weird ever since the BBJ incident. White: I'm fine. I just don't think we're brothers. Am I not allowed to have a different opinion? Red: It's fine man, you're just getting a little aggressive. You're supposed to be the "chill" one, remember? White: I'll be whatever I'm told to be, but I'm not going to be what I'm not, okay?? If it's not written in our code or given as an order, then it doesn't matter.

(All fall silent. Blue, Red, Green, and Yellow turn to each other and nod. All stand up from their current positions, dropping whatever they were holding. White looks surprised.)

Red: Okay it's time for: All -White: OPERATION: CHILL OUT White: Huh?

(The four pick up White and begin to run out of the mansion with him all while he's flailing around trying to get free. They get to their backyard and toss White into the pool.)

White: Are you trying to short-circuit me?!

(The four look down on White from the edge of the pool, arms crossed.)

Blue: It's about time you tell us what's going on. White: I told you nothing is wrong with me. Yellow: Then why were we able to throw you in there? Green: You should have seen this coming if you were still on the network. White: ... Red: Number 1, why did you desync? Is there something you don't want us to know about? White: ...

Blue: You can give us the silent treatment all you want, but we're not letting you out of there until you explain yourself. Red: Whether we're brothers or not, we're still welded from the same sheet metal. Yellow: We're here to support each other no matter what. We'll hear you out, even if it's something difficult to say. Green: We'll even keep it secret from the captain if we have to. White: ...I'll talk. Just let me out of here. It takes too much energy to stay afloat.

(The four nod and pull out White by the hands. White drains the water from his extremities. They stand opposed.)

White: I just don't like the idea of us being brothers. Blue: Do you not like us or something? Red: C'mon, we said we'd hear him out. White: It's because it'd hurt too much. Yellow: What would hurt? White: After the incident, something pierced my chest and began to hurt. I kept looking for whatever was causing the pain, but my diagnostic always passed without error. But it kept getting worse. It got so bad that I started producing distress signals, so I desynced to keep you all from finding out. Green: Why wouldn't you tell us that?! If you're making distress signals then something is seriously wrong! Yellow: We should probably get you to Neon J right now. White: Don't bother. I don't... want to see him. Red: What? What's your problem with the captain? White: I don't...know. Red: C'mon, just resync with us. We'll have an easier time figuring this out if you let us see it ourselves. White: ...I can't. I just... can't right now. It doesn't matter. It's nothing you all need to know about anyway. Red: This is going nowhere. Number 3 and 4, go find the captain. Number 5 stay here with me and 1.

All: Affirmative.

White: I told you I'm fine. Stop worrying about me.

***

(White has been placed on what looks an examination table surrounded by several monitors. Several cords are connected to his opened chest cavity. Neon J sits nearby White and a computer, observing the reports.)

Neon J: It's just like you said, you're not pulling up any errors but you're producing some very urgent distress signals that aren't actually being sent. It's like you're sending them to yourself. White: ... Neon J: *Sigh* The others told me what you said. I am very concerned about your condition. White: ...They said they wouldn't tell. Neon J: ...Rin. White: Don't call me that. A machine doesn't need a name like that. Neon J: What has you thinking that you're just a machine? You know that you're more than that. You're a person Rin. White: People can't be replaced with just the push of a button.

Neon J: ... I heard that you all were debating if you were brothers or not. I thought that was funny. White:... Neon J: I left that detail out so you all could decide that for yourselves. I didn't know how close you all would wind up being, whether you'd look at yourselves as mere comrades or best friends. I never would have imagined that you'd go so far to call each other brothers. If I'd known your AI would evolve like that, I wouldn't have left it so open-ended. Being so close... is only going to give you heartache. White: ... Neon J: Do you hate me Rin? For making you? White: ...I don't know. When I look at you I start feeling angry, but I don't know why. It's like these feelings aren't mine. I don't know... what's happened to me. Neon J: I see. Your syncing function is supposed to keep you all in harmony. The more you understand each other, the more you can function as a complete unit. But you're not just synced to each other. You're also synced with me. Whatever signals you send out get sent to me too, but it also works the other way around. White: ...but I've never heard your thoughts. Neon J: You have, you just don’t notice it. The signals I send back are just general reports about my location and condition so you all can find your way back to me. I can also send orders that way. But... you're a little bit different Rin. Neon J: Each of you was assigned a role in your squad. You of course are the leader, so you have a few extra functions to help you fill that role. Namely, you're more in sync with me than the others so you can react quicker to my incoming orders. White: ... Neon J: Part of that is that my emotional state gets transferred to you too.

(Neon J hangs his head low and squeezes his fist into his opposite hand.)

Neon J: I'm sorry. You're like this... because of me. White: ...But why? Neon J: After the incident, I was scared that I wouldn't be able to bring you back. It hurt so much knowing that I failed to protect you. I felt like I was about to lose everything again. To keep it from hurting I had to stop thinking of you as "people". You had to be machines so I didn't have to deal with the guilt of you getting killed on my watch. If I could accept that you were disposable, then it wouldn't matter if you'd all died because I could rebuild you. That's pretty terrible right? Not the kind of thing you'd want to hear from your captain. I felt so ashamed for even having thought that. I haven't been able to forgive myself all this time. White: So this hate... Neon J: It's probably my own self-loathing. I'm pretty sure part of me wants you to hate me. I don't have the right to your respect anymore, not after thinking something like that.

[gra-sonas]

Roswell, New Mexico’s Michael Vlamis sat down for an exclusive interview with HypabIe, and we got into everyone’s favorite alien love triangle.

Michael Guerin has a lot on his plate in Roswell, New Mexico season 2. His brother died, his sister’s husband died, he’s trying to resurrect the aforementioned brother, he’s learning more about his mother, and he’s trying to pretend that his hand wasn’t miraculously healed. And you thought your 2020 was off to a rough start!

We’re not sure how the guy is even finding time for romance, but we’re so, so glad he is. While struggling through things with his long-time-love Alex Manes in season 1, he also found a connection with Maria DiLuca. In season 2, it looks like he’s chosen to give things a shot with New Mexico’s most beautiful bar owner.

Of course, my first question was about Malex. Are things really over? What’s to come for them? “In a romantic sense, yes, this is the end for now,” Vlamis confessed. “But we actually had more scenes together this season than in season 1 where we really get to work on our friendship, which I think is what we really need.”

That’s probably not what Malex fans wanted to hear, but there’s still hope. If you read to the end of the interview, Michael Vlamis reveals his favorite Malex scene from Roswell, New Mexico season 2, and it sounds like a really good one!

Also, Vlamis revealed his three favorite songs to get into character as Michael Guerin. They are the incredibly fitting “Buckskin Stallion Blues” by Amy Annelle, “Mamas Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to be Cowboys,” by Waylon Jennings, and “First Day of My Life,” by Bright Eyes! If you don’t remember, that’s the song that Michael and Alex shared their first kiss to. *swoon*

Hypable: Often, different romantic relationships bring out different sides of people’s personalities. What’s your favorite thing about Michael with Maria versus Michael with Alex?

Michael Vlamis: I think with Maria he feels safe. I think with Alex there are moments of him feeling safe when they’re intertwined and in the bed and a couple moments we saw last year, but really he’s never feeling safe. Yes, his hand’s heeled now but he’s still wearing a bandana to hide that. First of all, because if anyone in the town pays attention to that they’re going to be like, “how did his hand get heeled?” but also that bandana is a reminder of the pain that he’s gone through in his life, and that pain, unfortunately, is directly correlated with Alex.

You might see a little bit of a softer side when we see Guerin and Maria coming together, and that was really fun to play. Everything’s okay. This is fresh, this is good, this is kind of my new home right now where I can come back to.

Hypable: What can you tease about Guerin’s journey to find his mother in ‘Roswell, New Mexico’ season 2, and how both Maria and Alex will be involved in that?

MV: Yeah, so over the whole season I really spend time trying to break that story and figure out what happened, which is just helping me figure out who I am, what’s my self-worth, and just kind of piecing together why I am the way I am and trying to piece together a family. Because yes, I have Isobel and Max…well, I had Max, but I never really felt like I had a family. Over the season, we’re trying to uncover this mystery of where my mom really disappeared, especially Alex. Was she in Roswell, for a little bit of time before she disappeared? Did she ever make contact with anyone?

It was fun to go back to the 1940s, early 1950s and see what life was like in Roswell back then. With the costumes and the set decorations there was a lot of fun to be had on set with that. As I am unveiling the story we see that story unveiled in the flashbacks. That was really cool.

Hypable: Isobel and Max have both begun to explore the breadth and potential of their powers. Will your character be doing the same in ‘Roswell, New Mexico’ season 2?

MV: Not exactly. Michael is playing a little bit of the victim card. He’s just been punched on his whole life, and taking a beating. And now, he lost his brother. It’s like when you go through a break up, right? You don’t care about anything else, you just miss that one person. What he’s thinking about right now is escaping, so he’s not trying to get his powers any stronger because part of him probably wishes he was just a normal guy who didn’t even have these powers. Then everything would be so much easier and they wouldn’t have had to kill a bunch of girls and stage a car accident and deaths. That’s all stuff that he doesn’t want. He was a good kid who was off the college, and then all of a sudden this changed his whole life and he’s just been kind of dealing with that ever since.

Hypable: On top of missing Max is he feeling any kind of pressure to take on Max’s role as the traditional big brother?

MV: One hundred percent. Their whole lives Max was always the hero and I think in a way, Michael, looked up to him for many years. But then when Max made the decision to cover up the murder instead of letting ourselves be exposed, I don’t think Michael Guerin wanted that. He’s a selfless guy for the most part, and he means well. I think he wanted the truth to be out there. But yeah, he’s going to struggle with that a lot and just figuring out what his new role is now especially with Isobel.

For instance, he didn’t wanna be at the church [for the funeral]. The only reason he showed up at that funeral was for his sister, so he knows deep down he has to step up and be this kind of hero savior thing, which he freaking hates. He doesn’t want that responsibility, but he knows that it’s his time to step up and play that role.

Hypable: Could college still be on the horizon for Michael Guerin?

MV: I think that’s one of those things that’s gone now, but I do think that he would take his talents and put them towards something bigger. If he’s ever able to fully escape living in hiding and the kind of prison that they’ve built around their lives. I think as time progresses, he’s going to continue exercising his talents and his mind and stepping up and not letting that all go to the wayside. But right now, he’s not thinking about that at all.

Hypable: Is he still eager to get back to his home planet, or did meeting his mom change that drive?

MV: I think it definitely changed the drive a little bit, but I also think with her being gone, and him knowing that she existed, it gives him hope. Maybe there are other family members or there’s another community of aliens still living somewhere and thriving. So yeah, I think it was definitely a deterrent. And that’s why you see him in these first couple of episodes. He seems like a guy who’s given up with the way he’s treating people, especially Maria. And also just how dirty he is. I mean, they made me so filthy this season…in like a CW hot way though.

I’m a dirty, dirty man who’s just a little hopeless right now. But yeah, as time goes on, he reels it in and tries to figure out why he’s here. Why is anyone here? Is he supposed to go home? I don’t know, I think that is all going to depend on how this season plays out, and also where his love interest is. I can see him getting his heart broken and just leaving the planet for sure, but I don’t think he really wants that if he could have that true love that he’s longing for.

Hypable: Are there any character dynamics that you got to explore more of in ‘Roswell, New Mexico’ season 2 that you were excited about?

MV: Oh yeah, it was fun doing more scenes with Michael Trevino (Kyle Valenti) this year. Obviously we’re working together to save Max. We only got a few scenes last year towards the prison shots at the end of the season where we were really together. Aside from that, it was just like me giving him a dirty look and pushing him off Alex in the flashback episode. It’s been really fun to work with Trevino just because he’s another guy who, like Nathan Parsons and Heather Hemmens, they’re pros. They’ve done this before. They’ve done eight seasons of a show.

Trevino was in my exact position where a show just comes about and changes your life. It’s really cool seeing how he navigate a set. Also, we just kind of mess with each other all the time. I mess around with everyone, but when it comes to Trevino, he’s such a confident man’s man. He wears really cool clothes, works out all the time, has a six pack no matter what he eats, so we just shit on each other. We shit on each other all the time. That dynamic really comes through when we’re working together as well.

[...]

Hypable: What are you doing to stay sane in this crazy time of self-isolation, and what do you think Michael Guerin would be doing?

MV: You know what, I bet I’m doing similar things to him. We have all these cinder blocks on a bonfire we built in our backyard and we’ve been taking those and making a home work out set up. So I’m doing prison workouts right now in my backyard, and I feel like that’s very Guerin-esque. Also, during this quarantine I’m eating healthy, I’m on a cooking routine with my roommates and that means that I’m feeling better about myself, so like Guerin, I’m just taking my shirt off all the time.

Hypable: Finally, do you have a favorite moment from Malex and MiLuca in ‘Roswell, New Mexico?’

MV: eah, I do. I’m going to focus specifically on season two. I was really, really proud of that last scene where me and Maria kissed at the end of episode two. That was a really cool scene to do. And actually, what was so interesting about that is in the episode I said “I’m sorry” to her, but it wasn’t written. Carina MacKenzie, our showrunner, came out and was like, “listen guys, this is working great. The chemistry, the passion, the love, the heartache, the hope, everything is there. But Guerin was just all over some girl in the bar in front of Maria. This is bullshit, he needs to apologize.” And so she was like, “Vlam, do you want to try working in an ‘I’m sorry,’ right around this moment?” And I did that, and I think it kind of changed the whole scene. That one little line. It made you remember that this guy is a good guy, he’s just caught up in something that he’s having a hard time wrestling with right now.

With Alex, there’s a moment at the end of the season that I actually asked the director for another take. I have so much pride as an actor, I’m just so hard on myself, I never do stuff like that. But in this one moment, I knew how much the scene meant and I asked for another take and something really special happened internally with how I was feeling. In that moment, locked in with Alex. I’m not saying if it was romantic or whatnot, but there’s a scene at the end of the season that was probably my favorite and it’ll be a lot of fun to watch too.

If you’re looking to see more of Michael Vlamis outside of his regularly scheduled Monday night appearances in Roswell, New Mexico, you can check out his recently released three-part series on michaelvlamis.com! Making it is a hilarious (and extremely well shot) series about a baby-faced Michael Vlamis and his friends trying to “make it” in Hollywood.

He decided to release the series in response to the increased demand for entertainment due to the COVID-19 quarantines. “It’s a digital series making fun of this industry, and everything that we go through.” The first episode tackles an audition process that I’m guessing is shockingly similar to his experience with Roswell, New Mexico, complete with cowboy hat and “Magic Mike abs,” but presented in a way that will make you laugh…and maybe also make you slightly nauseous. Check it out!

~ HypabIe

[theonewiththefanfics]

Hawkins’ Charm (Part 3/?)

Synopsys: They had gotten out of Hawkins. After all the shit that had happened, all the heartache and pain, Billy and the Reader had gotten away from that hellhole, building their life in California as he had dreamed. But when Max’s graduation rolls around and they go to celebrate, it’s as if the Upside Down was just waiting for all of them to return. And it has a bone to pick.

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x f!Reader; platonic!Steve Harrington x f!Reader

Genre: angst, fluff

Warnings: swearing, drinking, smoking, I don’t think there’s anything else :)

Word count: 3998

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT CONDONE BILLY’S ACTIONS AND THE THINGS HE’S DONE! THIS IS BASICALLY AN AU, WHEN REALLY LOOKING AT IT! SPOILERS FOR S3! READ AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION!

It truly was high school all over again. As Y/N and Billy walked around the newly rebuilt mall, he kept bickering with Max about her going to a party. They had decided to meet up with everyone for a bowling game instead of sitting with Susan and Neil in tense silence by the dinner table, but the two were going at it like they would at home.        “You were so much worse at my age than I am,” Max exclaimed throwing her hands in the air. “Besides, I wouldn’t get drunk or even drink, I have graduation the next day.”        “You could be drinking water and still get roofied,” Billy’s hand slid into the back pocket of Y/N’s jeans. “Trust me, guys your age only think with their dicks.”        “Like you did?” Max’s ginger eyebrow rose, a smirk on her face as her brother only glared at her.        “Watch it, Maxine.”        “Call me Maxine again, and I’ll drive your Camaro into the lake.”        Billy pointed a stern finger at her as they entered the bowling alley. “Touch my car and you’re dead.”    “How're things between you and Lucas?” Y/N butted in, tired of their arguing. They really were siblings, and it didn’t matter if they were related or not, they definitely acted like it.        “We broke up.”        Billy snorted. “Which time is it now? Twelfth?”        “Fourteenth.”        “What happened?” Y/N asked lacing up the shoes the guy behind the desk had given her, but where she thought it’d be just stupid teenager drama, Max’s face completely fell.        “He’s going to NYU… got his acceptance letter during Spring Break.”        “Max, that’s amazing,” Billy said but his sister’s mood only soured.        “Yeah, well for him, not for us… he’s going to NYU I’m going to UCLA, but the thing is we’d talked about applying to the same ones, and he did it behind my back!” she exclaimed. “He didn’t even tell me he was thinking about it! That’s what pisses me off the most.”

       Billy grunted standing up after having put on his own shoes. “Do you want me to beat him up?”        “What? No!” Max rolled her eyes. “I can do that myself. I just… this isn’t the kinda shit we usually break up over.”        Y/N gave her a sympathetic look. Before she’d ever met Billy, she had been thinking about going to NYU as well. And if she was being honest, for the first few months they lived in California, she had regretted not going to the Big Apple. Things had obviously worked out just fine, but it was a little tear in her heart to know her plans hadn’t really gone the way she thought they would. Then again, Y/N didn’t think she’d have to fight the Mind Flayer either, so there was that.        “And what kind of things did you usually break up because?” Y/N asked as she and Max went to pick out their balls, Billy quickly ordering some drinks and food for them and the rest of the Party as they’d join later.        “I dunno,” the redhead sighed and looked up at the board showing her name. “Like in eighth grade, I dumped him ‘cause he stepped on the back of my shoes for a week. He thought he was being funny, so I told him to back off. Another time was ‘cause he’d been copying my homework, but when I wanted to do the same he wouldn’t give. That’s the kind of stuff we argue abou-“ her train of thought was interrupted as everyone else loudly entered the alley, Nancy's hand in Johnathan's as El, Dustin, Mike, Will, Alex and Lucas all barreling in.        Max's blue eyes locked onto the latter’s brown ones for a moment, before he broke the gaze and took one of the bowling balls. The silent treatment was in full force.          “Did he say he was going?” Y/N asked, after having scored a spare and sitting down onto one of the seats. El was instantly by their side, wanting in on the girl conversation.        “No,” Max groaned looking at Lucas who was holding the ball by his face, trying to figure out the trajectory that would give him a strike. “But that’s not the point. The point is, he didn’t even tell me he was applying… like I think we would be able to manage a long-distance thing… but it’s just… like he didn’t trust me, like he was afraid I would discourage him from doing it.”        “Would you, have?” Y/N hesitated to ask but knew she should. “If he had told you he wanted to go to NYU, knowing you’re set on UCLA, do you think you’d try and talk him out of it?”        “I just…” Max dragged a hand through her hair, tears she never let fall glistening on her lower lash line.  “I love him. I don’t wanna lose him. But he doesn’t trust me.”        By that point, Nancy, Johnathan, Steve with the addition of Robin who’d been busy earlier that morning had joined in on the game, and were all preoccupied with beating the kids' scores.        “Y/N!” Billy shouted, “You’re up!”        “Look, Max, I think you two need to sit down and talk about it,” the girl stood up and went to grab her bowling ball. “Maybe he was scared of losing you too… maybe that's why he didn't say anything...”        Her Y/E/C eyes zeroed in on the pins, arm pulled back and with a little skip forward, she let the ball go, knocking down the ten white pieces of wood.        STRIKE! The board announced with a little animation on it.        Max just huffed at the implication it had.

***

       Dustin ended up being the one who scored most.        “It’s the missing bones, I’m telling you!” he laughed as everyone gave back their bowling shoes and made their way out of the mall, the parking lot practically deserted save for a few cars.        Y/N’s hand was in Billy’s, and he was swinging them back and forth.    “How does that make any sense?” she asked looking up at the teenager. All of them had grown so much, it was practically unfair.        “It’s just the way it is.”        “So, you’re like Gumby or some shit?”        “Uh,” Steve butted in, “I’m pretty sure it’s gumbo. We had this conversation years ago.”        Y/N raised her eyebrow and looked at Robin who just rolled her eyes. “You do know gumbo is a dish, right?”        “Yeah, but does it have any bones in it?” he remarked. Nobody had anything to answer, so he just gave them a smug smirk, opening his car’s door. “Thought so.”        Dustin, Robin and Lucas piled inside Harrington’s vehicle while Nancy and Johnathan would bring Will, Alex and Mike home, Max driving with Y/N and Billy.        “We were actually thinking about going to Tina’s after we drop these ones off,” Nancy said, leaning on her door. “So, if you wanna join, we’ll be there in like half an hour.”        Y/N sighed, nodding her head and giving a small smile before ducking inside the safety of Billy’s car. They drove to Max’s in silence, the rock music that usually blasted on high had been turned down low, so Neil wouldn’t hear them approaching.        “Think about what I said. Please,” Y/N said to Max with a sympathetic smile as the teenager hopped out from the backseat.        She responded with a small nod and then closed the door.        The two watched Max skip up the porch and unlock the door. Only when her bedroom’s light was off and there was no other movement in the house did they pull away and started to drive down the road.        “Do you think we could go to that party?” Billy’s question caught Y/N completely off guard. It was already eleven thirty so without a doubt it would be in full swing.        “You didn’t want to earlier today, what changed?”        He just shrugged and looked back at the road, streetlights guiding their way. “Just thought it might be fun… ever since Clara, we haven’t had much time to ourselves. I absolutely love her and would give up everything for her happiness, but I just thought… I dunno… it might be fun…”        Y/N bit her lip as she watched Billy chew on the inside of his cheek. She didn’t really want to go. The thought of seeing Carol, Tommy and the other delinquents was not an appealing one, and, without a doubt, the woman would try to get a rise out of her, seeing as Y/N had helped the bad boy of Hawkins settle down, but he looked so nervous when he’d asked it, she just let out a sigh and nodded.        “Why not… besides, Nance, Steve and the rest are going as well, so… sure.”        But Y/N regretted that decision almost immediately. She didn’t mind parties, just the people that went to them, and when the first people she saw was Vicky Mulligan and Tina Wakefield sucking on some strangers’ necks she immediately decided to scour the place for her friends, if they had to stay.        “Look who decided to show up,” Tommy slurred, already intoxicated with his shirt buttoned open and sweat or beer trickling down his chest. “Ladies and gentlemen, the King of Hawkins has finally graced us with his presence. Though I have to warn you – he’s quite boring now. Doesn’t drink or even fucking smoke.”        Laughter and booing erupted throughout the house, and Y/N saw Carol snicker, as she had joined them by the driveway, a cigarette hanging between her fingers.        Billy didn’t even bristle as he pulled off his leather jacket and slammed his car door closed. “What’s the record?”        “What?” Tommy laughed dragging a puff before exhaling it through his nose.        “I asked what’s the record?”        Tommy’s lackeys all scoffed and crossed their arms before he answered. “You’re still in the lead.”        Y/N saw him smirk and threw her a wink. “Them I’m about to beat myself.”        She sighed, knowing what was going to happen. As the boys all gathered around Billy, grabbing him by the legs and waist to hoist him up, Tommy passing the hose to let the beer flow, she entered the house, harshly slamming her shoulder into Carol’s, Vicky and Tina sneering at her.        Pure Fuel was her mission, and that’s where she found her saviour in the form of Robin.        “You don’t look like you wanna be here,” she stated handing Y/N a red cup filled with the alcohol mixture. They’d shared English with Mrs Nelson during their last year of school, but other than a couple of group projects the two girls hadn’t interacted much, until the summer that changed it all.        Robin was still someone Y/N looked forward to seeing and hearing from, but she also knew that their friendship was nothing compared to hers and Steve’s. In a lot of ways, Robin had replaced Y/N as Steve’s best friend, but she wasn’t bitter about it. In fact, she was truly happy there was someone he could be completely himself without any other intention than being a friend.        “That’s ‘cause I really don’t,” Y/N snorted and gulped down half her drink. “I have no joy sharing air with those three harpies.”        Robin nodded and sipped on her gin and tonic. “It’s truly amazing how they haven’t changed a bit. It’s like they’re still stuck in high school.”        “You’re telling me,” Y/N shook her head. “Carol looked like her eyes were going to pop out of her sockets when I said Billy’s my husband.”        “I would pay to see that,” Robin pointed with a finger at her and chuckled in her raspy tone.        “I mean, imagine how she’d look if you said you have a daughter.”        They snickered for a moment and shook their heads, Robin looking to the garden where the popular ex-kids-now-adults had gathered.        “You find a girl in London?” the question took her attention away and though unexpected it wasn’t unwelcome. She trusted Y/N enough to come out and had never heard a harsh word from her. The blush that crept up Robin’s neck would’ve been enough of an answer, but she did give a soft ‘yeah’ as well.        “Tell me everything,” Y/N leaned forward, genuinely interested in what this person was like, and if she made Robin happy. But she didn’t get a chance to open her mouth when the deafening cheering of boys bombarded their senses.    “The Keg King still lives!” Tommy hollered over the heads of everyone, and Billy let out a yell of victory.    He couldn’t help himself as he slipped back into that persona that didn’t care about anything or anyone. Obviously, things had changed, and where he used to slink away to find his taste of the week as a teenager, Billy was very much so devoted to his family, but it was nice to let loose for a bit. If only for a moment to become the Keg King.         His wife stood by the door aisle looking at the aftermath of the whole ordeal, but contrary to where her husband had drunk beer for a minute and a half without stopping for a breath basically, she had been nursing the same cup of Pure Fuel the entire time.    In Y/N’s mind, she thought they’d come here, mingle for a bit, maybe talk with a few other of their fellow ex-classmates and go home to rest, but given how it was moving closer to two AM already, she knew that wouldn’t happen.        “Babe, did you hear that?” Billy’s arms were wide open in pride as he looked at her. “I’m still Hawkins’ reigning King.”        Y/N pulled her mouth in a tight-lipped smile and crossed her arms humming in agreement. “Imma get you some water.”       Tommy H scoffed. “Water; if you’re getting him anything get him Pure Fuel. It’s a party, not a sermon.”        “C’ mon,” Billy sighed moving to where she stood, hands grasping at her waist and pressing his forehead against Y/N’s. “Don’t be like that.”        “Like what?”        “A mood killer. This is just one night.”        Y/N scoffed pulling back. “What happened to ‘I don’t drink or smoke’? You were pretty happy to put both Carol and Tommy down when we first met them today, but the second you have a bigger audience it’s back to the old ways?”        “You know that’s not true,” the words were more like a growl than anything else. “I’m just trying to make the best out of a bad situation.”        “You wanted to come here,” she pointed out. “Not me. I’m just tagging along.”        “Well maybe then you should go home.”        That was not the answer Y/N expected to hear from Billy. With wide eyes, she pulled back from his embrace and stepped out of arms reach. “Maybe I will.”        With that, she turned around and weaved between the drunk people, searching for someplace quiet, but given how every single space in Tina’s house was packed, the only unoccupied place would be the woods at the back.        Y/N ran a hand down her face, as she stepped onto the forest floor, the noise of gravel crunching under her feet being replaced by moss, making her steps completely soundless.        “And what are you doing here alone?” a voice from the shadows startled her, but it turned out to be just Steve as it seemed he had run away from Tina’s as well.        “Reliving the first party of senior year, I guess,” Y/N snorted giving the house a quick look. “Billy’s the Keg King again, and I’m hiding in the woods. Seems about right.”        “Shouldn’t’ the Queen be next to her husband?”        “The Queen,” Y/N sighed, “is apparently killing the mood… I didn’t think things would go back to the way they were so quickly…” she bit her lip and exhaled another breath. “Like, I know we’re not that much older, and it doesn’t matter if we’re twenty-two or eighteen, but I thought, you know… we have a kid,” she chuckled. “We’re married… maybe I was just naïve thinking that he’d be the same as he’s in San Diego.”        Steve sighed, a pained look on his face. “Come on, don’t say that,” he went to stand next to Y/N. “The guy’s crazy about you. And I never thought I’d say that about Billy Hargrove. You know, the guy who went around town screwing every girl that would open her legs for him. He hasn’t so much as looked at someone else. He loves you, it’s just those assholes goading him.”        “I know,” Y/N sighed and leaned against the tree trunk. “and I get it, I guess. It’s easier for him to shut everyone out and become someone he isn’t here. At first, it was kind of sweet, that only I’d got to see who was underneath all that brashness and temperament, but now… it just feels like a weight dragging everything down. It’s like all those soft moments we’ve spent together and with Clara mean nothing as long as he gets to beat the record again.”        Steve could understand where she was coming from. They’d been best friends since forever, and after having been through unimaginable shit, he was genuinely happy Y/N had found someone to call her home. And having seen how affectionate Billy could be when they were at the bowling alley, his heart hurt for her.        “Hey,” he tried to distract her, “the junkyard wasn’t that far now was it?”        Y/N shrugged. “A twenty-minute walk. Wanna go?”        And it really was like high school all over again. With the booming sounds of the party remaining in the distance, Y/N walked side by side with Steve, catching up on the things they had missed over the phone or just reminiscing about how things were, and how they’d changed.        “Been drugged by any more Russians?” Y/N quipped as the sound of cicadas chirping trailed behind them.        “No,” Steve replied through a snort. “But anytime I walked into an ice cream shop, I was a bit weary.”        Their conversations drifted from one topic to another without a single pause. Y/N felt like she was seventeen once more, and that feeling only intensified when the smashed carcasses of old cars came in view, both of them dashing to the old bus they loved to sit on top of.        Together they set off into a sprint, loud giggles taking over the quiet of the junkyard, as Y/N leapt onto the hood of an old crushed BMW, but Steve slammed open the door of the bus and decided to use the hatch on its roof.        “I,” she breathed out heavily, “win.”        “You,” Steve mocked her out-of-breath voice, “cheated.”        “I did not!”        “Yes, you did!”        “Really,” Y/N lifted an eyebrow and crossed her arms. “How so?”        “You had a head start!”        “No, I’m just not slow like you.”        At that, he showed her shoulder and she almost tumbled to the ground, had it not been for Steve’s fingers grabbing onto her jean jacket. Billy’s jean jacket that she had stolen to wear. She sighed and leaned her head against Steve's shoulder, nose hidden in the lapel of the piece of clothing, her husband’s smell enveloping her.        “I just really hate them. Hate how they were able to get under his skin when he didn’t even let Neil do it.”        Steve’s arm wrapped around her shoulder as he rested his head against Y/N’s. “Well, Billy was right about one thing – Hawkins’ a shithole.”        For a moment they were silent, eyes trained towards where the lights of the mall glittered brighter than the stars in the sky when something moved between the cars. Something that was coming towards them.        “Steve,” Y/N’s voice trembled as she extended a shaking finger. “What’s that?”

***

       Robin’s heart was pumping as if she had just run sixty miles, Nancy and Johnathan scattered throughout the house as they tried to locate Billy. He had disappeared after his little argument with Y/N either gone to a quiet place to gather himself or Tommy had dragged him somewhere and shoved a bottle of tequila in one hand, a pack of cigarettes in the other.        She finally found him when the Californian exited the bathroom, a desperate girl trying to flirt with him, not noticing how his eyes didn’t even lift to look at her. But he did see a panting Robin, that grabbed onto his bicep and pulled him down the stairs.        “I saw something in the woods.”        Billy was beyond confused. “What?”        “Steve and Y/N,” she took in a breath and quickly exhaled, “they were in the woods, talking and then I saw something."        His heart dropped to his feet at the words, but he masked it quickly with a sneer, trying to push through the crowd and into the kitchen, the anger that had returned to his blood since arriving in Hawkins, slowly starting to boil.        “Yeah, well, I hope those two have a grand fucking time.”        “No, you don’t get it,” Robin shook Billy’s shoulder a bit and yanked him hard enough that the man turned around. “I said I saw something.”        That’s when pure fear took over his body. In all honesty, he would rather Y/N cheat on him, to say she didn’t love him, tell him she was running off with Steve ‘the Hair’ Harrington than what Robin’s words meant.        Immediately, he was running or at least attempting to get out of the house and to his car. He could already see Nancy and Johnathan waiting by the door aisle. He was almost out of the woods, when a slurring Tina stopped him in the middle of his tracks, trailing a hand along his exposed chest.        “Billy, where are you going?” she tried to purr, but he just pushed her away in disgust.        “My wife’s missing, so I’m going to find her.”        “You don’t need her.” The woman was relentless, especially when there was liquid courage in her system. “She’s boring, a snooze fest. Bet she doesn’t even put out.”        Her whiskey stained breath slammed into Billy’s nose, and he physically recoiled.    “You need a woman that knows how to take care of a man’s needs,” Tina continued on.       Billy was fuming by that point. Every wasted second was a possibility of Y/N getting hurt. Sure, she had Steve with her, but as far as he knew, neither had any kind of weapon to protect themselves, and if Robin was sure that a monster from the Upside Down was lurking in the forest and maybe even tracking them, there wasn’t much they could use.    “Someone like you?” he asked.       Tina’s smirk widened, and she was emboldened, sliding her palm down his chest, abs and towards his belt buckle. “Someone exactly like me.”    “Listen here sweetheart,” Billy started grabbing ahold of Tina’s hand. “If in these two minutes that I’ve wasted on talking to you or rather listening to you put down my wife something happened to her, it’ll be your head I’ll be coming after. If even a single strand of hair I find amiss on her head, I’ll scalp you with my bare hands.”        “She’s probably off somewhere screwing Harrington!” Carol hollered after Billy as he pushed Tina from where she’d been grasping at the collar of his shirt.        “Go choke!” was the only thing he dignified them with.        Elbowing away Tommy’s hand that wanted Billy to turn around and prod him to do another stand, he rushed out of the house and to his Camaro Robin following suit while, Nancy and Johnathan piled into her car, but not before she took out a shotgun from her trunk and passed it over to Billy, a box of bullets with it.        “The junction before the junkyard. We’ll try and get there from the other side.”        No more words needed to be spoken as the engine roared to life, Billy speeding away from the party.        “Don’t do anything stupid, baby,” he muttered to himself hoping that somehow Y/N would hear his words. “I’m coming. Everything’s gonna be alright.”

Tags (crossed out wouldn't take): 

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A/N: If you wanna be tagged, please drop me a message :)

P.S. I went to see Spider-Man: Far From Home and it was such an adorkable movie, like omg I loved IT!!!!!!!!

[ftpthemovement]

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer. Psalms 19:14

Every day we wake up we have the ability to transform our lives and the lives of others. We can create positive outcomes or subject ourselves to negative ones. Some of us decide to allow the outside world to affect us by giving them our peace. While others decide to control the outcome of the day by being proactive and taking extreme ownership. It’s best to make the choice now, not to let the former affect you, even though it’s likely the majority of the people you come in contact with will fall into this category.

So what do we do to keep our peace? We proactively control our words and we make the best of every encounter we have with people. What I mean by that, is we can control the outcome of almost all the ongoing communication we have with others. How do we do that? One way, I’m going to y’all about today is keeping a book on others.

Why in the world would you keep a book on others? Well, number one, to remind yourself how people operate, number two, to save yourself from running into any potential hazards in communication. Scripture says, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.” Php2:3 If we are to esteem others higher than ourselves, it’s best to serve them in a way that helps make life go smoother for everyone. That way the words that come out of your mouth and the meditation of your mind will be sound and acceptable in the sight of the Lord.

Let’s break down some examples. Let’s say one of the superiors in your office an absolute monster before lunch, after lunch they seem to be a little easier going and more approachable. When would be the best time for you to approach that person? Why put yourself in a position to incur harm unless absolutely necessary? Regardless of how you feel they should act, isn’t it wise to make mental note of their personality, and esteem them higher than yourself through acts of selflessness instead of selfishness?

I’m sure you could give them a piece of your mind on workplace ethics and how they made you feel, but wouldn’t it be better to set a good example before that approach? People tend to notice when you are being genuine and going out of your way to serve them. Something about true love, care, and generosity, tends to get noticed when it doesn’t come from a heart of expectation. Normally people are willing to let their guard down and be receptive to criticism when someone is willing to bridge the gap to see why they are the way they are. But let’s stay on topic and give a less vague example:

Your wife and you haven’t gotten along for a long time and you both have your reasons. If you set and took the time to look past the grievances you have with one another, you could probably start to identify the things you know she likes and appreciates. Now, you could just complain and moan because she’s not gonna care to do the same in return, or if you do those things it’s still not going to change, but, that’s just you being selfish and having a heart full of expectation on a person instead of God. At least take the time to make the book, and go apply the things you know are applicable.

What are the things that you know she loves? What is her favorite food or choice in entertainment? What are things that would help her pick up around the house? What are ways that could serve her that she would truly be thankful for no matter if she expressed it or not? What could you say that would help brighten her day? Etc etc.

Trust me I know that blanket statements don’t work in every situation. But in statements like the one, I’m making people always have an additional point and counterpoint for every lazy motive they have. They normally take an exorbitant amount of time exposing how they’ve been wronged and why they feel how they feel. These people tend to look for as many ways possible to justify their shortcomings by making excuses. Keeping a book is not for those people.

Those people will keep a book on you alright. It won’t be a book to help the situation, it will be a book to keep a note of everything you’ve ever done wrong to hurt them. A book for them to justify their rationale and stay the same on the bitterness and resentment. The book I’m talking about isn’t for people who like living with excuses, it’s for people who still care enough to make a change. When you take the time to keep track of emotions, verbal cues, trigger points, likes, dislikes, interests, and dislikes, you begin paving the way to successful communications with each entry.

Once you have enough information on the people you have relations with, you can truly begin to control the outcome of almost every situation you enter into. It allows you to operate smoothly and without the risk of losing your cool and saying things you don’t mean. It allows you the freedom to operate around trigger points and avoid insteps. After a while, you begin to actually have fun serving others because in return you do see that it yields incredible returns.

The only problem when tend to run into is our own tongue. The tongue itself is one of the hardest things to control. When taking action use it as little as possible. But, If you have to use it, it’s best to have a mission in mind to esteem others higher than yourself. This proactive commitment saves you a lot of heartaches when you know how to use it right.

So, if you want the word of your mouth and the mediation of your heart to be acceptable to Christ, esteem others higher than yourself. Stay prayed up going into, in, and out of each situation. If for some reason you find yourself in trouble, shut your mouth, and walk away! You got this, now go take what you have and apply it to your everyday life. Go write the book to help be a positive influence on others and esteem them higher than yourself. Watch what the outcome ends up being when you truly have zero expectation of others, but place all of your expectations on God! -ES