#we listened to we've always lived in the castle

[cyrsed]

oh i just love merricat :-)

[veloursdor]

the thing about larys strong is that i think he's been lonely his entire life, lonelier than even he realised/admitted to himself. he craves connection, someone to see him for who he is. and that's what's been guiding most of his actions throught the entire time we've known him.

when he saw alicent being unheard and unseen, he tried to form a connection with her as he saw himself in her (through manipulations of course, but his intention there when saying "i could be your ally" were sincere). but she rejected him (by refusing to see him as a man, by being horrified at his true self (the harrenhal fire), etc) and thus he grew to resent her and want to control her/humiliate her like she "humiliated him", probably thinking it was enough because of the power she gave him.

but then viserys died and alicent's power died with him.

spoilers for season 2 of house of the dragon below the cut

i think his "love" for her... changed or was put on the back of his mind after 2x04, especially after he sees the moon tea and she's in pain. when he asks her about criston, his reaction to her words is as if he is confused, as if he's recalculating what he thought of her because he's seeing her in a whole new light.

and maybe he is seeing her truly for the first time ever.

he said "you and i are the same", was always listening in on her conversations to gather information, maybe even convincing himself by doing so that she truly was like him. but, i think that, when larys says "you have not been yourself" is his way of saying "who are you? are you who i've always thought you were or someone i do not know?" and has to change his view of her, of what he convienced himself he saw in her.

maybe he sees that he's been living in a lie made of his own words.

so, when the council scene happens, he pities her and rejects her idea, because it has no ground and she's grasping at straws. (i do think he does feel sorry for rejecting her but he also doesn't have enough solid ground with aemond as regent (his position in the small council is fairly new) and slighting aemond would cost him the power he has, so he stays quiet and looks away).

however, he also manages to drive a nail to alicole's coffin but he walks away without looking back at the mess it left.

they then don't share a scene at all for the rest of the season.

from then on all his scenes are with aegon, and we see a side of larys we haven't seen before.

ageon gave him power (of course larys manipulated aegon with the Hand comment) because of his "loyalty" following blood and cheese (i still believe larys "let it happen") and made him his master of whispers. he placed larys in the small council (when alicent never did in the 6 years she acted as regent) and gave him status outside of the dungeons. he "brought him [larys] out of the shadows" in a way.

the show has made a point to tell us, since episode one of season two, that larys has been looking at aegon the same way he used to look at alicent in season one, staring him down as if he could see what he's made of, constantly analysing and calculating how to best approach him.

he made small attempts at conversations and funny lines ("that castle is more crippled than me") as the whole alicent thing is going on.

and then the battle of rook's rest happened.

with aegon barely holding on, we have a scene where larys is honest, vulnerable, sincere maybe for the first time ever (yes there's manipulation, but also genuine compassion). he sees the struggles aegon will have to face because he lived them himself.

like with alicent in the weirdwood, he tried to form a connection with aegon. but where alicent "rejected" his true self, aegon instead listened to what larys was saying, saw the truth in it and raged, which made larys feel seen and heard, beyond manipulation and twisted words, probably for the first time in his life

larys, for all his talk that love is a downfall, craves connection, the desire to not be alone in the world. he does feel love.

and whereas alicent rejected his love and was disgusted by his true self, aegon welcomed his help, invited his advice, and embraced his aid to become stronger

i think larys will be loyal to him as long as aegon allows his love and it does not fester into resentment, like his love for alicent did

[selfloverrrrrr]

The Fallen Angel~

Chapter 1

Masterlist , This Story Masterlist

( All characters are aged up/18+)

Minors Do Not Interact

Read the warnings carefully....if you don't like my stories block me not report

Warnings : love, fluff, a lot of plots, smut , heavy smut, unprotected sex, Noncon, Kidnapping, physically and emotional abuse, biting, torture, size difference, fallen angel gojo....

Summary: Gojo Satoru was an angel. But instead of falling in hell accidentally he falls on earth and got a life like humans. Then the story begins....

It was a sunny day. We all were doing our work. Cutting the wood and pack them for the royal family. The zenin family. We live in The Kingdom of Zenin family.

"Oi Geto...calm down. You're going to cut the earth with the wood with the pressure you are giving" Shoko said who was sitting on the floor beside where the boys Geto, Nanami and haibara were cutting the woods. Geto cackled. "Mhm.... don't say that Shoko! Geto is strong after all!" I said grabbing Geto's bicep and he winked at me. "Yeah yeah continue flirting with each other " Shoko said with a giggle.

"whatever you say.... anyways, guys guess what.... I've made a dessert.... it's too sweet... I've tried hope y'all gonna like it " I announced with both of my hands behind me and a cheeky smile. "We like everything you make y/n" Nanami said with a smile. "Awww thank you sooooo much Nanami!" I replied.

We all lived together. We all are friends. We means me, Shoko, Geto, Nanami and Haibara. We don't have parents. From our childhood we grew up together like that. We all live in one house. All of us are best friends. We help each other with anything. Geto was the strongest in our friend circle. As a human he's too strong! He's the one who always protects all of us from any danger.

It was almost the sun set. All woods were chopped for today. We girls tied those woods and took it to the cattle car who brings the woods to the castle. Geto, Nanami and Haibara were handing us the woods and me and Shoko were bringing those woods to the cattle car. Two soliders were standing beside the car.

"why are you still working so hard, y/n? When price Noya is ready to marry you and you can live a luxury life marrying him?" One of the solider said. "Why are you still talking so much instead of shutting your fucking mouth up knowing damn well that I can chop your damn head with this axe if say a single word again " Geto said glaring at the soliders. They quickly went to the car and went out from there.

"it's okey Geto... don't listen to them... you know that they always come and say that so I can say yes" I said putting a hand on his shoulder. "Nah nah... it's totally fine... Geto is just protecting his future wife" Shoko teased with a smirk.

Geto looked at Shoko and said "madam why don't you go and marry Haibara who is already your boyfriend?" Geto teased back. This time Shoko blushed. "Why are you blushing now ma'am?" I teased. We all laughed.

We all were laughing when suddenly we heard a loud sound. That came from our garden. The sound was like as if something fell in the garden. We all became silent. "What was that?" Nanami asked. "I'm thinking the same" Haibara said. "Let's see it together what was that" I said.

We all started walking towards the garden together. We were almost near the garden when we heard a groaning sound. Our heart was beating so loudly. We finally reached the garden. But what was that...? All of our eyes widened. We've never seen this in our whole life. There was a man on the ground of our garden. But he wasn't like normal human. He looks like a normal human but it has two big white wings on it's back.

Chapter 2

Tagging : @liciaforlife @candy69gurl @byakuya61085

[evermorelore]

Can we take a moment to talk about Alexius and Solas?

The parallels and perhaps the foreshadowing In Hushed Whispers gives us is WILD considering what we know of Dragon Age: The Veilguard.

Once the inquisitor is sent forward in time and finds Solas, there's an dialogue choice to essentially say that you're glad Solas can understand the timey-wimey concepts from Dorian - to which Solas replies:

"You would think such understanding would stop me from making such terrible mistakes. You would be wrong. This world is an abomination. It must never come to pass." Hm, interesting.

Because once we leave the castle interior to where you can see what has become of the breach he says: "The veil is shattered. There is no boundary now between the world and the fade." And is not happy about it. Is this not what u wanted babe?

When comparing Alexius and Solas, this line from Alexius in particular hit hard:

"...all that I fought for, all that I betrayed! What have I wrought?" 👀 It's giving: what pride has wrought.

And at last, given the new cutscenes we've now seen from Dragon Age: The Veilgaurd, the most interesting parallel I found was between the conversation Alexius and Felix have once you go back in time and Solas's conversation with Varric.

Alexius: "You'll die."

Felix: "Everyone dies."

Varric: "People are dying right now! You need to listen! Please!"

Solas: "People are always dying. It is what they do."

I'm not a good analytical writer, but there's something so juicy and depressing to read into those comparisons. Wildly, what Solas has been attempting did come to pass - in some fucked up way mind you - and it wasn't worth it. It destroyed everything good about both realms. Naturally he wouldn't remember a future he didn't live, but damn what wild parallels to see when replaying right now.

[spunsugarmusings]

Young Frankenstein: The Musical Starter Sentences

Starters from the Mel Brookes' hit musical Young Frankenstein. Change pronouns and tenses as necessary, and enjoy!

"What happened in that castle made our lives a living Hell!"

"We're the happiest town in town!"

"Hold the happiness!"

"Please, do I look like the kind of madman who'd prowl around graveyards, digging up freshly buried corpses?"

"I don't indulge in hijinks or tomfoolery!"

"I live for truth and reason, that's the reason I exist!"

"Hearts and lungs are simply tinker toys when stacked against the brain!"

"His reflexes have no freedom to react when I mistreat him."

"Those naughty thoughts are fine with me as long as they stay locked away in your imagination."

"You can savage me and ravage me; I care not what you do."

"Oh everybody look! How unique. They're not touching."

"Please keep your hands off these."

"It'll be like old time, you and me, right up there with the world's greatest pairs!"

"We've only met in a dream!"

"Up until now it's been the worst time, but now that you're here, we're a team!"

"What good is a stooge if he ain't got a boss?"

"I'm very high spirited, doctor. I hope you won't hold it against me."

"So, have you thought of any ways you could use me?"

"Nothing's better than a hayride, underneath the sun."

"There! There wolves!"

"There wolves, there castle!"

"Don't risk my curse, it could be worse!"

"Join the family business, learn the family trade!"

"Make yourself a monster, and make the world afraid!"

"Follow in our footsteps and you'll earn eternal fame!"

"As you know, predestination, from the day of your creation has determined you vocation, that's a fact!"

"Just relax, create a serum; come up with a brilliant theorum!"

"This is one position that you never can decline!"

"Love dances in on a whim."

"He was a bully and a brute, he was as crazy as a coot!"

"He was my boyfriend!"

"He always treated me like dirt!"

"But I was happy to be hurt!"

"I was an innocent young lamb, and he was a dirty old goat."

"He was the one I gave my heart to, but we were never wed, even so."

"If I'd mention wedlock, he put me in a headlock!"

"When I asked to be his wife, he stabbed me with a kitchen knife!"

"Where did all the good times go?!"

"If he had an angry fit, I was the first thing that he hit! But I didn't give a shit!"

"So, now we hurl the gauntlet of science into the frightful face of death itself."

"Death has ruled without question."

"Tear the night asunder, cast your light upon the dark!"

"Give my creature life!"

"We're considered both a Death and a Tourist Trap."

"Rich and poor are all soft-shoeing it in hotels or huts!"

"Even dogs are also doing it, pedigrees and mutts!"

"Do the Transylvania Mania!"

"Catch the monster before he strikes again!"

"Hello heartaches, goodbye kvellings."

"Let's forget about thinking, thinking's never smart."

"Flush your brain right down the drain, and listen to your heart!"

"Lose your mind, 'cause love is blind, and listen to your heart!"

"You'll find such bliss in the kissin' you're missin'."

"Intellectuals are ineffectuals when it comes to making love."

"Don't resist cupid's dart."

"Everybody loves to get a surprise."

"It all can change, if your fates arrange a nice surprise for you."

"There’s nothing like a wonderful surprise!"

"Here’s what we advise, never bother people with a surprise!"

"It's been so long since I felt the touch of someone's hand."

"Oh, Lord, let's face it, we're talkin' LONELY here!"

"You don't know your left from your right."

"You'll be the greatest creation of man since the invention of fire!"

"You'll be cheered, never feared evermore!"

"You know, until now my life has been nothing but a meaningless world of silly parties."

"Again? Oh, you're incouragable, aren't you?"

"We will take a hay ride when we're on our honeymoon!"

"Even monsters fall in love!"

[deepseaorcapt]

Let You Break My Heart Again

Pairing: Revali x GN! Hylian Reader Summary: You and Revali have been friends for some time despite your differences before. You worked/lived in Hyrule Castle Town for most of your time and finally found time today to visit your dear friend. Themes: Romance, Angst, Unrequited Love Word Count: 1,661 A/N: Reader is honestly heavily based off of my OC, Lillia, but since this is my first rodeo, I kind of wanted to make it for everyone, so here you go! I also suggest listening to Laufey’s Let You Break My Heart Again. Tell me if you’d like a sequel too because I’ve been thinking of some things.

It's been quite some time since you've last visited Rito Village. Your duties at Hyrule Castle Town never dwindled for the past months at all. Today, however, you've found some time to ride your stead up to Rito Village, a place where you found comfort for most of your days.

Giving your horse a pet and leaving him at the Rito Stable, You breathe in as the cool air brushes your ears slightly. You sigh as you take in its sights. The sound of chirping from the little chicks welcomes you as you make your way into the village.

Greeting guards as you pass by, as well as some other friends you've made before, you make your way to greet the village elder. On your way there, a very fond friend of yours catches your attention as he stands on his own landing, Revali's Landing.

"Well, if it isn't you. Took you quite a while to visit me and I could tell from the look on your face, you've missed me very much." He snarkily remarks as he makes his way to you, his wings holding each other on his back. You scoff but give him a slight smile, "Well, Is it bad that maybe I have?" You say with fondness as Revali is quite taken aback, the feathers on his neck puffing up as he shakes his head to the side. "As you should." He replies softly, quite obviously embarrassed. You chuckle as you watch your friend. 

Approaching the landing, feeling the cold air all around you. It felt truly like home. You approached the edge, holding onto the railing and looked at Revali. "It's nice to see Rito Village still be the quiet and humble place I've grown to love." You said as you smiled and looked up at the slightly taller Rito. He quickly retaliates with a huff, "Well, even without you here, we would have been fine like we've always been." Revali has always been sharp with his tongue and a bit insensitive at times but after spending time as his friend, you've learned to see through this proudness and aloofness of his. 

You look at him, glancing at his bright emerald eyes. You tell him, "Well, I would honestly say I'm glad to hear it, I know as well that I have to thank you for keeping this place safe too, Revali." Giggling a bit before giving him a genuine smile and a slight bow as you thank him. His feathers puff up again and he avoids your eyes. It's not that Revali isn't used to such politeness, but it's more that he finds it embarrassing that you acknowledge his credit so easily. "But of course, I excel well for the village. It would be disappointing if the Rito’s champion would let any harm come close. Besides, I would say that we, Ritos, have great taste." He says proudly as you chuckle. 

Silence fills the air once more. ‘Has it always been this awkward between us both?’ You thought as you tighten your grip on the railing slightly, your heart beated loudly in your chest as your ears are filled with the deafening silence.

"Enough of this small talk, I've got no time for such. What matters do you have in the village?" He curiously asks, breaking the silence. 

You stayed silent for a few moments, thinking over the reason why you came to the village in the first place, why you wanted so much to escape your duties for a day to visit Rito Village.

You breathe in getting ready for what you were about to say. "I�� I really wanted to… No, I needed to take time off. It was a bit suffocating back home.” You say a bit solemnly before you hear Revali say quietly, “I see.”

The silence returned for a few moments as you looked at your hands as your nails slightly dug into the dark pine wood. The cold felt like it was seeping into your snowquill coat. Feeling a bit overwhelmed by the silence, you bit your lip slightly then looked at Revali. 

“I also… I also honestly wanted to see you, Revali." 

Gently let go of your grip on the railing as you finally said it all. You give him a tired smile as a slight blush dusts your cheeks. 

You've grown fond of the Rito as much as you've had with the village. Sharing memories, as well as, little connections through your hobbies have made him a great friend to you. His brilliance in archery and flight, you've thought are all reasons for his growing ego and found it cute. In moments like these, when you both just need time to stop and let silence fill the void, you both found comfort in being there together.

He chuckles as he realizes the situation and faces you. “I would honestly say, I’m honored to have you want to see me.” He teases you a bit before watching the view in front of him once more. He wasn’t the type to really admit he felt the same, but you knew with the way he phrased it, he was just as glad to see you as well. It brought a smile to your face as you let out a giggle. You loosened up and then asked, “How about you, Revali? How have you been? I’ve noticed you’ve been nicer to me today.”

His prussian blue feathers slightly puff up in the wind as he relaxes before he starts, "Well if you must know…” His voice trails off as he puts his wings on the railing as well for support. He was hesitant and it showed. He closes his eyes for a bit before facing you, staring at your eyes directly. "I've grown fond of someone in the village and… She has... returned my affections as well." He says rather quietly but a hint of pride can be heard in his voice. 

You blink as you hear this. His words didn’t processed to you as quickly as it should nor as you had imagined. As a Hylian, you knew your affections wouldn't value much to the Rito, accepting that the anatomical differences might have affected his attraction to your Hylian nature, but was it really that impossible of an idea that you could’ve been together?

Your mind was empty save for the echoing words of his affections for this other Rito. Affection, how much you craved his. You were silent which concerned the Rito quite a bit. He calls your name softly and it rips your heart even more. Even after the revelation, the fondness of how he says your name takes hold of your heart so gently. You couldn’t help but despise it and yet, your arms tremble wanting to be in his embrace. You shook your head as you composed yourself, trying to be as supportive as you could to your friend. 

"That's great, Revali. I wouldn't peg you to be the type to fall in love at all." You teased as you tried to fake a smile to him, causing him to puff up his feathers again and looking away from you. "Wh- You really think I'm not capable of that!? You think that I didn’t have the ability to fall in love?!" He scoffs at your words, sounding offended by your teasing but knowing of your usual teasing. You reply to him with a smile, “Couldn’t help it if the only few words that come out of your mouth are training, pride, and greatness. All of which, directed to yourself.” He opens his mouth in disbelief and crosses his arms quite a bit before you look back out into the region once more.

Revali settles down and sighs, "... I just thought it would be fair that you knew, as a... friend of mine." It took quite some time before he said the last part but he did so anyway. His words sting more than they should, as if the back of your neck felt a prickling down your spine. You both were silent. The winds of the Tabantha region blow as you hear the ruffling of cloths and feathers. It felt agonizing to you both and yet, you knew, you’ve told yourself before. You’ve told yourself before that the day would come for you to bear the burden you’ve let grow in your heart as you’ve fallen for your Rito friend.

You broke the silence first, realizing the more you stayed, the more your thoughts may wander. "It's great to hear that, Revali. I.. I wish you two the best." You give him a genuine smile before giving him a nod, looking back at him. Revali was looking for your gaze but couldn’t find it, as if you were looking far beyond him, lost in thought. You’ve said your goodbyes, saying that you have some things to do for now which left him on the railing of his landing. He stayed and stood there against the railing, staring out through the snow with a confused look on his face for his friend's sudden exit.

You sigh as you walk down the steps, you lose your energy to talk to the village elder and everyone to that extent. Entering the inn, you laid on the bed you rented out for the day. It was still bright and early in the afternoon as you watched the blue skies out. 

It drove you insane. Your feelings drilling down your heart, your eyes glossy over those thoughts. You lay on your side, slowly raising your legs to your chest. "You held up well" you told yourself quietly as you held your hands together. The grip tightens at every thought you've had with him being with his beloved.

As they held hands, they shared an embrace, they had their first kiss. It ruined you.

 "One day" You whispered to yourself as the tears fell, "I'll stop falling in love with you."

[lady-dulcinea]

I was listening to The Count of Monte Cristo musical's soundtrack (the book is a great one too, we should all read it together someday) and found this one song, I Will Be There, to be sooooooo Mina and Jonathan's vibe! Specifically, it has big "Jonathan escaping from the castle through sheer need of seeing Mina again X Mina on Whitby Bay longing for Jonathan and worrying for him" energy.

In the light that falls at moonrise In the rhythm of the rain In the miracle of ordinary days In the hush of night I will be in the whisper of lovers Everywhere, you will find me there

In the rustle of a curtain In the bustle of the world In a thousand little unexpected ways When you lift your gaze I will be like the shimmer of one small star Out there, shining everywhere

I will be there beside you through the lonely nights that fall So close your eyes, remember my embrace I will be there like mercy; I will find you through it all This do I swear, I will be there

In a language never spoken Live the promises we've made In the endless love that owned me heart and soul In the certainty I will always be true And as near as my next prayer, you will find me there

In the echo of the ocean In the hunting of the wind In mysterious extraordinary ways Through the darkest sky I will be like the shimmer of one small star Out there, shining everywhere

I will be there beside you through the lonely nights that fall So close your eyes, remember my embrace I will be there like freedom; I will find you through it all This do I swear, I will be there

In the harbor quarter

In the stone and mortar

In the star that we both share

In the sound of laughter

Now and ever after

Look for me, I will be there

I will be there beside you through the lonely nights that fall So close your eyes

Remember my embrace I will be there

Remember my embrace Yes, will be there

Like justness; I will find you through it all

This do I swear, I will be there This do I swear, I will be there This do I swear, I will be there

[dragon-appreciator-fray]

Depths of Promises Sworn

A reading by the author!

Tonight's chapter: 1 - An Unwanted Prince.

I thought it would be fun to do a reading of my own story. Below the Keep Reading break is a long series of thoughts on my own work. Despite the risk of turning subtext into overt Word of the Goddess, I ultimately want to give myself space and a platform to share how much this story means to me.

But first off, a link to the chapter I will be quoting. (Everything I write is intended to remain freely available to read for as long as I live. After that point it will get considerably more difficult for me to guarantee.)

Obligatory mention that I accept financial support in the form of patreon subs and ko-fi at this time.

If you like what you read here, the link above has 25 chapters as of the time of writing. Royal Road counts just the text (minus author's notes and announcements) as 86,682 words.

Depths of Promises Sworn opens with a letter.

"By order of the Vylian Castellan, forever may she reign." are my first choice of words.

We have what is framed as the name of a nation, not so subtlety meant to sound like the word villain. Whoever we're talking about, she rules from a castle. The line ends with a refrain to paint this as a long lived entity.

This line is meant to cast a shadow over sooooo much. But to say anything more would be spoilers.

The body of the message more directly and succinctly outlines the situation. An arranged marriage between the fourteenth of the Castellan's brood to a pair of characters with lunar themed names.

A protector is assigned, material investments are articulated, and the continuation of some correspondence on the subject of a deepening alliance justifies the opener as a tangible letter that exists in the world.

The sign off line: "Faithfully yours until the thrones of old are bled dry and our vile moon is satiated" is all intrigue~!

Setting up anchor points to play with later is important, I think. And now that I'm well into Arc Two? I am quite satisfied with the payoff for what this line sets up. Even just in Arc One, if there is proof that the correspondents here can fuck with the moon, it does not bode well for whoever is occupying an Old Throne.

This was always going to be a story with a sense of scale and intrigue, but I'm quite comfortable building up to that at my pace.

Arc One: Everything to Prove

I did not name the arcs until I got to Arc Two, but this was more or less always going to be the name of this one? It gives me a lot of room to just let the Fourteenth Prince Ayre make the most of their circumstances.

We've got a scale. If the Second Broodling is casually discussing fucking with a moon and bleeding dry the thrones of old, what is the Fourteenth capable of? Very little? Or an alarming amount?

There's a lot of room there for Ayre to reveal what they are capable of and at their own pace. I always knew that I'd hold off on introducing anymore of Ayre's siblings at least until Arc One's end.

After that, well, the safety wheels come off and things can escalate whenever one is on screen.

Astraea Wyrmsbane is introduced as a lilac horned and fleshed woman who is tall enough to need to be mindful about the carriage's height.

Between this and the letter, I feel like I've done a good job at belittling Ayre's importance in their own story.

Almost immediately after, Ayre wonders about how capable their vulpine driver is of listening through the walls.

With Ayre uncertain of their privacy and likening of the carriage to a cage, much of the conversation is presented as hiding behind a layer of allegory or intrigue.

Ayre's first words... are about the Castellan. Something I genuinely don't think I do enough is allude to her.

I've got a carefully crafted opening that talks about the main character as a pawn, sold off as some bargaining chip in an arranged marriage over whatever an implement is. (Equivalent to cursed magic wands)

The first thing overtly spoken about the Castellan is that her dungeons do not pretend to be comfortable.

And I quite love that as a first line.

Someone who confines a character framed as their child to the dungeons for much of their life is not someone I expect readers to like much. And yet Ayre would prefer the dungeons to this carriage delivering them to their destination three days early.

I definitely go on to frame and think of the Castellan as Ayre's abuser. That she is open and unapologetic about it is probably my favorite part. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

Ayre is quick to display a mindfulness about their dolls, who themselves need to be reminded to take care of themselves. They are then shown to be very aware that any vulnerability Astraea shows in this chapter is something to be seen as consistently exploited weakness.

Ayre comes from incredibly fucked up circumstances. Yet they immediately present as striving to be sensitive and responsible with the kind of power afforded to them.

I portray them as new to court, and as an unwilling participant, but their hands are not bloodless. It is the kind of thing where I can make them just knowledgeable enough to be incredibly capable and confident when it is needed, but there is a lot of room for them to learn alongside the readers.

Ayre is not a blank slate.

Ayre is deeply deeply traumatized, but they are fresh from circumstances where they cannot under any circumstances show it. Which affords me opportunities to constantly reintroduce you all to Ayre as their backstory reveals itself and Ayre makes peace with their past.

The Depths of Promises Sworn comes from a place of me wanting to write about queer characters in incredibly bleak circumstances.

The Depths are a curse that Ayre frequently uses.

I frame it as a crucible to such an extent that this is a story where Ayre even struggles with agreeing to make promises with the characters they meet. And I'm okay mentioning that here to set expectations.

The Depths as a location and backstory element probably deserve their own book. But I did not want to write Dark Fantasy when I first started writing this story, merely skip to writing a traumatized protagonist because that's what I keep writing, whether I intend it or not.

That's the TLDR on why Ayre is "like this."

Ayre wants better.

They accept things proposed to them that might be incredibly forward for others, and just work from whatever position is put forward for them.

When next Astraea speaks, I recognize the hope in her words. “My life only began to feel like my own once I escaped the shadows cast by my infamous parents.” Unable to correlate this hope with anything but foolishness, I hold my tongue. What am I supposed to say to that? That much of these woods still fall under the shadow of Castellan’s mountain fortifications? Or the last time someone looked at me the way she is now, I tore out their throat for daring to think the depths were possible to escape? No. My late sister would never forgive me for being as cruel as the rest of my family.

And there we have it. I propose Astraea as something of a mentor in this chapter. But Ayre already had an incredible positive influence on their life. A sister who would never forgive cruelty in Ayre.

I decide instead to ask the most obvious question that occurs to me. “Your parents didn’t craft you to be perfect?” I mean, just look at her unnatural lilac skin, horns, and claws.

This is immediately followed up by Ayre making such inquiries that should give readers a lot to think about what kind of fantasy world they are stepping into.

This is one where physical features CAN BE PICKED.

But which way is this going? Eugenics nightmare world or a queer paradise? Something to chew on for later as I leave that deliberately unanswered, giving only somewhat alarming non-answers as I allude to what things are going on.

Astraea goes on to speak of personal reflection counterbalanced by what makes her feel like enough. All sentiments Ayre has engaged with in this conversation.

This quickly escalates to this fanciful story of Astraea's talking openly of challenging her family.

And what does Ayre immediately think?

"Did they hurt you?"

Ayre has my heart.

I love them so much for being focused on the personal cost of attempting such a thing, nevermind thinking about how it played out.

The casual mention of the Castellan's library including information on any number of long lived entities, but none fitting Astraea's description is intended to be a sign.

Ayre is very cautious. I don't really see them as the type to ask someone their age. But a lil critical thinking and some reveals later will reveal that Ayre hasn't had much opportunities to gain an appreciable measure or understanding of time.

What this section is intended to outline is that Astraea is not someone Ayre will be able to run away with lightly.

In spite of me framing all of this as a comforting story or a commitment to offer Ayre assurances that all will be well, I do give you more than enough information here to make any number of educated guesses about why Astraea is here.

Ayre clearly isn't thinking of the bigger picture of their own future and why someone might invest in them early. They're still used to surviving assassination attempts but do not see themselves as having a position of any real worth beyond being able to claim Fia and Selescia as their own.

With Astraea having three lovers, you could take multiple guesses and still be true. As of the most up to date chapters? I show the fate of one and very clearly outline another.

But there is never enough time to communicate all the things it feels like we need to.

This feels like a staple line that Ayre already believes. Surely it will never come up again.

If I allow myself to assume for a moment that she is trustworthy, Astraea is probably who I needed most to fill the role of my Sworn Blade. "I suspect you are going to prove irreplaceable, Astraea.” “I know.” She says, once more adopting that confident mask, and not a moment too soon. Our illusion of privacy is broken as the carriage door opens to reveal our white furred guide. “Right this way, young Princeling. Your new home awaits.”

Confirming that the vulpine guide from earlier is definitely some kind of furry fox girl. Just to really cement that I'm committing to something unconcerned with elves, dwarves, and humans.

Astraea has genuinely treated this whole chapter as a comforting truth that Ayre isn't ready for.

But there is hope for the hopeless yet.

I enjoyed writing all of this up immensely. I think I'll definitely be doing these again. Even if they are a bit of a commitment.

[lukaherehelp]

恋の羊羹 « The feeling you get when you meet a person with whom you are going to fall hopelessly in love. »

a "the fox & the prince" playlist.

Please, listen in order. Under the cut is links to the lyrics of each song and a highlight of the lyrics that fits the narrative!

( I wrote them as if they were text extracts and changed the pronouns on some of them to fit the narrative.)

Lu Decker & Gonzalo Hermida - Pasajeros a su tren || 👑&🌹

" We both stopped living at the same moment and now each one of us will have its own story, because ours could not be. I am sorry I have not returned I'm sorry, I won't come back And I'll always remember how nice it was, that now because of selfishness, it's not so nice any more. Look at us "

Taylor Swift - Midnight Rain ||🌹

" My boy was a montage: a slow-motion, love potion. I broke his heart 'cause he was nice. I guess sometimes we all get just what we wanted. And he never thinks of me. And I never think of him "

Alec Benjamin - Paper Crown || 👑

" He'll make it out, but he's never the same. He's looking down at the scars that remain. But you hold your ground when your kingdom's in flames. 'Cause it's the story of a king whose castle has fallen to the sea, knowing there's no one who will come and save this king. And there's no one, who is strong enough to save your love. There's no fairytale. When all he needs, when all he wants, when all he finds. When all he is and ever was is compromised 'cause there's no one to love him when you build your walls too high. And there's no one to love you when you trap yourself inside. "

CHUU - Hitchhiker ||👑

" I crash-landed somewhere. In the blink of an eye, everything became a new trip. A straight road extending on the horizon. As I walked, I wondered if I would meet a friend. Taking a deep breath and looking around my own earth even without a map, somehow I like it. My small, secluded island where beautiful flowers bloom. I open my eyes wide and engrave it in my heart, I have a lot of questions in this different world. I've never seen this unfamiliar view before, so it becomes special. In my secluded island with many mysteries, something unpredictable might happen. "

The Chainsmokers & Coldplay - Something Just Like This ||👑 to 🦊

" I've been reading books of old, the legends and the myths, And clearly I don't see myself upon that list. But he said, "Where d'you wanna go? How much you wanna risk?" I'm not looking for somebody with some superhuman gifts. Some superhero, some fairytale bliss. Just something I can turn to, somebody I can kiss. I want something just like this. "

Demi Lovato & Bert McCraken - Give Your Heart A Break ||🦊 to 👑

" I know you're scared it's wrong, like you might make a mistake. There's just one life to live and there's no time to wait, so let me give your heart a break, when your lips are on my lips, then, our hearts beat as one. "

Lola Índigo - cómo te va? ||👑 & 🌹

"I watered the flower and you made it rot. I was metal and you rusted me, you blamed me and then you left. Your memory won't go away, it's not time for you to come back now. 🌹 How do I explain to you that it wasn't for you? How do I explain it to you if you're not here? I promised you Heaven and it didn't make sense because in reality we were already there. 👑 Now that I'm gone, you want to change. I have realized that. You were my weakness, it hurts and squeezes. That's why we're not coming back, I don't trust you anymore. When you're around I only feel cold. I'll cry my sorrows, I'll jump into the void. I'll get out of this, but not with you. "

Demi Lovato - Don't Forget || 🌹 to 👑

" Did you forget about me? Now I'm left to forget about us. And at last, all the pictures have been burned and all the past is just a lesson that we've learned. I won't forget, please don't forget us. Somewhere, we went wrong. Our love is like a song, but you won't sing along. "

IU - Love wins all || 👑 & 🦊

" Dearest, darling, my universe. Would you take me along? To a place I can't dream with my poor imagination. Far away in the universe, from Earth to Mars, will you please go with me? Go to the end with me, my lover. The two of us, side by side, gone astray on purpose. Crush me in your arms, give me a lovelier kiss, lover. Our love wins all, love wins all "

[hailey-murdock]

Lose you

Chapter 3

Paring: Matt Murdock x Fem!reader

Warnings:(for this entire series) Angst, death, illness, nightmare, established relationship, drinking, depression, use of pet names, fluff, implied smut, mentions of college Matt and reader(let me know if I missed something out)

Tags: @little-miss-dilf-lover

Summary: Matt "the man without fear" may not after all be that. He fears he'll lose the person he most loves

Other characters: Foggy Nelson, Frank Castle

WC: 2.4K

A/N: Keep in mind the warnings, this chapter can be triggering to readers. Please read with precaution. (Reblogs, comment and likes are appreciated)

"You're amazing, sweetheart." Matt felt so much pride in his heart after the both of you had shown each other how deep your love is.

"And you're perfect Matty".

"Thank you..I love you, hun."

"I love you to the moon and back matty". A smile appeared on your face while the two of you held each other, entangled naked in the bed sheets.

"I love you even more than that. I love you to the multiverse and back. I will always love you in every world that exists. And I will always love you in every world that exists..in every timeline..in every universe. You're my soulmate".

You felt your eyes water. "I'm so sorry Matt, I don't want to leave you-". The guilt was eating you up inside of knowing you were going to leave behind Matt alone.

"What do you mean.."? He felt his heart beat faster and he started to tear up. What is it? What did the doctor say"? Matt had genuinely been caught up in the moment that he forgot about everything. That illusion was slowly starting to fade as reality finally managed to set into his head. 

"Matt remember that he said I have 6 months to live, you were there with me". 

The color drained from Matt's  face as he heard your words. His eyes widened and he stopped tearing up immediately. Matt didn't know what to say. He didn't know what to think. His mind was blank.

"That's not..".  Matt closed his eyes as tears started to fall. "That's not fair.."

That was all Matt could say. He was speechless. He didn't want to believe it.

"Matt, listen to me, we are gonna make those 6 months the best 6 months we've ever lived. And I'm gonna love you until my last breath". 

"Y..you promise?" Matt tilted his head, tears running down his face. He was going to try to believe it, to keep a positive attitude. But deep down, Matt just felt like his world was collapsing around him. He was in denial.

You crossed your heart "I promise baby".  You smiled softly, but your face was still red and you were still wiping tears from your eyes.

"Thank you..thank you for that. I..I..I'll be strong. For you and for us. I'll make these last 6 months of your life memorable. I love you".

"You don't have to be strong Matty, it's okay to be sad and cry about it. You need to let it out, don't bottle it up. That will do you more harm".

"Ok ok..maybe I'll allow myself to cry..just a little.." Matt smiled and he gave a little laugh. He wiped his tears and he gave you a little kiss. "Hey...I don't know what I would do without you. I don't know how I would be strong enough to deal with anything..without you. You're my rock. You're my compass. I don't..I don't know what I would do without my rock..my compass..my love".

You cried softly at Matt's words. "Ever since I've met you Matt, you have made me a better person each day. You've shown me what real true love is and I'm thankful for that. We've both have made mistakes about our relationship in the past but we've always done everything we can to move forward and love one another"

Matt started tearing up more as I heard you as well. "You make me a better person too. You taught me what it's like to be kind and to be loving. I was so tough before I met you..so cold. But you..you showed me what it means to be warm, what it means to be gentle..what it means to be kind. You taught me things..you even taught me that it's ok to cry..that it's ok to be sad. Your heart is full of love..and you've taught me that". 

You grabbed Matt's hand and kissed it. "You, Matt Murdock are by far the greatest blessings that God has given me in my entire life".

"You're the greatest blessing God has given me too. I'll never understand what he sees in me. I don't understand how he could make a man as imperfect as me just happen to meet someone as perfect as you..but I'm so grateful that I did. I love you so much".

You wrapped your arm around Matt's arms and held it  tightly. "You are an angel sent from God to me".

Matt's eyes widened and tears dropped from his eyes even more than before.  "I...I don't know I deserve that title. I'm too imperfect.". He laughed a little bit. "I'm just..just a man. Who is in love. A silly, imperfect man who is in love".

You leaned in to kiss Matt's soft lips. "There are no words to describe...what you are to me..what we are to each other..I love you Matt Murdock".

Matt held you tight. "I love you too, sweetheart. I love you so much". Matt sighed and he closed his eyes. "I just wish that we could be together forever..but that can't be.."

His voice was sad. "I'm not going to give up, though. I will try and make every second I have with you count and live every second to the fullest".

"I know you will and that's why I love you Matt".

Five months pass and you're  getting worse each day. Matt still tried to put on a smile, but over the months his heart felt so heavy..and he tried his best to keep things positive. His heart broke though as he watched the days slowly go away. Matt tried to make things the best they could be..and he tried to spend as much time as he could with you, to make each day as memorable as he could.

Over the months Matt started to go back to college, and he tried to give himself something to work towards as well...to keep his mind off of things.

You were on call with Foggy, you both had agreed on him visiting you in a few. But started feeling really sick but you didn't want to say anything to Foggy. So you decided to call Matt while he was at school. 

The sound of the buzzing was loud in your ear and it was starting to get hard to keep your eyes open. Finally Matt answered the phone. 

"Hey sweetheart".

"Matt?" Your voice sounded so weak. Matt's face quickly went from neutral to worried.

"Is...is everything alright"? He began to walk out of the classroom and he started to walk back to the apartment worried. "Are you ok..are you feeling sick..?"

"M-Matt I need you to c-come h-home". You say very softly to the point you could barely hear your voice and you felt so weak that I collapsed on the floor and passed out as you tried to walk to the bedroom. 

Matt felt scared when he heard your words. He felt my heart drop to the floor and I started to get nervous when he heard the "thud" understanding that you fell.

"No no no..". Matt ran into an alley and I kept running as fast as I could. And jumping up to the roof and running to you. He felt tears drop from his face as I was already expecting the worst...but I was trying not to think about it.

You laid on the floor mumbling softly his name. Matt had never run faster in his entire life like in that moment, tears dropped from his face as I thought about being alone again. As he thought about losing...you. Matt knew what this meant.

"Please God, no..please. Tell me I have at least a little more time..".

Your heartbeat was getting slower by the minute. After some time had passed, Matt finally managed to get there. I ran so fast to the house...to get to you. He ran in the house and I sensed  you laying on the floor. Matt dropped to his knees next to you. 

"N..No...please". His voice broke. "You can't die...you can't". Tears dropped from my face again as he hugged you and he squeezed you tight.

A tear ran down your face and you felt cold, your body was freezing. Your heartbeat was getting even more slower and that for the first time ever Matt hated the way your heart beated. "M-Matt?" You pulled him with the last bit of energy you had left. 

"Y..yes..I'm here". Matt put his head on your chest and he hugged you tightly.

"I'm so sorry. I..I don't want to lose you. Why so soon"?  Matt was trying to hold his composure, but he found it hard to do so as tears continued to fall from his face.

"I-i love y-you in every world t-that exists".

Those are your last words as you take your last breath.

Matt heard your words and he felt a rush of grief hit his heart. He closed my eyes and his tears dropped on your face as I kept hugging you closely. Out of so much pain Matt let out a scream of pain and anger. He felt so much emotion..so many different kinds of emotions..all at the same time. He didn't know what to do or to say.

"N..no..No no no no no". Matt kept shaking his head. "God no". Matt squeezed you close, refusing to accept what you said. Even if it was true, he didn't want to accept it.

Your lifeless body laid there in his arms. More tears dropped from Matt's face as I kept holding you..not letting go. He doesn't want to believe this. Matt closed his eyes and he  tried to block out everything he was feeling and he just held you..but it didn't work. Matt kept crying.

It had been an hour since Foggy had called asking to come by and when he got to the apartment he saw Matt on the ground holding your lifeless body.

"Matt"? Foggy couldn't believe what was right in front of him. Tears pricked his eyes. He was speechless. He had just called, how was this possible. You sounded fine on the phone call. 

Matt didn't hear him. He was completely and utterly consumed in his grief. When he heard his name..I felt an immense amount of sadness. Matt  opened his eyes to see Foggy in front of him, and Matt felt tears running down my face again as his chest began to drop. That was the final nail in the coffin.

"N..no". It became too much..Matt couldn't accept it. Foggy immediately called for an ambulance to take you away. 

"Matt get up". Foggy tried to pull Matt away from you, he couldn't stand the scene in front of him. He tried to stay strong for Matt as he held back his tears. In Matt's grief and sadness, he didn't stop him as Foggy started to pull him away. Matt let himself fall to the floor and his heart broke even more. He felt so crushed. He felt like I had lost everything.

"Foggy…she's g-gone". Foggy held Matt in his arms to try to comfort him as he saw you on the ground. "It's all gonna be okay". Matt started sobbing as he felt so much emotion. His heart was completely shattered, and he felt like his soul was being crushed. He held Foggy tightly in a hug as he continued to sob in desperation. 

The ambulance came to take your body away. When the ambulance came, Matt felt his heart drop. He didn't want to let you go...there had to be something he could do. He wouldn't give up. Matt wanted to stay with you, no matter what. He tried asking them to be let inside the ambulance. Matt even attempted to go in. He tried going into the ambulance but they told him they wouldn't allow him.

"No..please". Tears dropped from Matt's face as he watched them take you away from him. Foggy held him back to let them do their job since he tried to get into the ambulance, fighting with them. "Matt, we have to let her go".

"F..foggy why? Why"?! He cried into his shoulder in grief. There had to be something that could have saved you. Matt had never in his entire life had felt so weak and powerless. All because he had lost you. You were gone. 

"I'm sorry but it was her time to go Matt". 

Tears kept falling as Matt heard the ambulance drive away, taking you away from him. First he lost his dad, Stick and now you? Why? Wasn't he god's soldier? Hasn't he sacrificed so much already?

"It can't be the end for her..please don't tell me that". He felt like his heart was going to explode as so many different things were hitting. Matt felt so crushed and he wasn’t ready for this.

I'm so sorry Matt but it's real. S-she's gone and there's nothing we can do…look we have to plan a funeral for her….."

Funeral.

Matt's heart dropped even more when the reality finally set in. You were gone..and then he and Foggy had to plan your funeral. He felt even more sad. Matt closed his eyes as he felt more tears run down his face. Matt felt like the only one who could understand his pain was Frank. Who knew this could be so painful? Of course Matt lost many people in his life, but you, with you it was so much different. You were the reason Matt wanted to live, to keep on fighting his demons. 

"I...how?..this doesn't feel real". 

"It's real bud and I'm truly sorry, I know how much you loved her. Foggy hugged him tightly. He didn't know what to say anymore. His guard was crumbling slowly. He tried so hard to be strong for Matt but he couldn’t. 

"I don't know how I can live without her...everything I did was with her in mind. Everything I loved..she was a part of it. She was..she was my whole life..and she's gone. This..this isn't fair".

Foggy didn't know what to say except just to hold you. Matt was completely devastated.

"Please God..tell me this isn't real.Please tell me this is all a nightmare..that I'm going to wake up soon".

"I'm sorry Matt".

Previous | Next

[pwblogarchive]

July 2005

July 4, 2005

your number one with a bullet:

i love the way you have with me.

i love william beckett. like a boy loves a boy.

i love this one girl. she makes me swoon.

i love your tired eyes trying to keep up with us on stage.

i love the way youre gonna make me an honest man.

and im kinda easy on the eyes sometimes, right?

i love being up at 9 am.

i love the night.

i love living forever.

i love summer.

i am loving this.

and you and everything.

you cant miss me, baby boy, we're doing big things.

thanks for always being the bestfriends and fans we could ever have.

- petey

July 4, 2005

----dearests

sorry i never get on the internet anymore. we're in fresno, california. warped tour has completely taken over our lives. everything we breathe and do is warped tour right now. we love seeing all of your little red faces singing with us. we're working on a new video right now. we'll probably shoot it later on this summer. we've also got some other exciting things coming up. theres nothing like seeing the same people over and over again over the years. you mean the world to us. keep up the votes over at TRL! we're thinking about you every second, so don't forget us. lets just live forever and ever. we've got some new plans coming for the end of this summer and fall.

hot and miserable but totally in love.

love you all

peter.joe.patrick.andy.

July 7, 2005

hey beauties.

hotness on warped tour.

checking in. just stealing an internet signal from our friends in My Chem. speaking of, we are really excited to have them on the TRL countdown with us! good music is taking over again. keep voting! the info is on the front page. if we keep it up there, we're pushning to do a free fans only show with mtv paying for the venue!! keep your fingers crossed. you guys have always been our ambassadors and made the world listen- number one with a bullet. we are going to be on the cover of Alternative press later this year. we did the photoshoot for it- kind of a creepy idea. but we're excited for you to see it. we have also been writing a treatment for a new video- i think it'll suprise some people. we don't get on here as much lately due to all the madness going on with Warped tour. but we still wanted to let you know how much your support means to our band, and it shows on a daily basis. so thank you. boo and yah. i dyed my hair black. now it doesn't look so shitty anymore. blah. i am tired but it's way too hot out to sleep. howl's moving castle is a great movie and made me feel alive. thanks for coming out to the shows...

i heart leslie simon. go listen to maximo park before you fall asleep. it will make you smile and miss someone/something you love.

"i sleep with my hands across my chest and dream of you with someone else..."

keep on living (forever).

xo peter

July 11, 2005

Soooo its been a dramafree summer so far which is amazing. Almost as good as swimming pools and sleepovers. I'm watching the notebook does that make me sucky? Circle y or n. I need to take a shower. Nobody likes a dirty boy. I really don't have anything good to say.... No good words or neat quotes. Oh well.

Can you vote us back to number 1 on trl? That was a pretty amazing moment for us and we'd love to have another shot at it. Again, its all up to you though the info is in the news on the front page.

I miss you dearly.

XO

July 12, 2005

i'm in canada. it can't take me. i am stealing all of it's candy and pretty colored money. hidden behind eyes painted up to block out the sun. no more talking about hair color and eye color - the who's who of future failures. throw it away. close your eyes and put the speaker next to your pillow. dream away. dream yourself to life. stop wasting your eyes trying to figure out who is the heart - the smile - the voice - the words. you can't pull them apart. its just a mess. how you understand us is so one dimensional. but changes are coming. you won't wrap your head around us so easily. "you're nobody until somebody loves you" at least that's half true. let's not make it through the night. come on. you look so wrong but you feel so right. "he tastes like you only sweeter he tastes like you only sweeter he tastes like you only sweeter he tastes like you only sweeter..." and so on until the end. sometimes i'm just a goddamned lunatic. but i only keep myself this sick in the head cause i know how you get off on these words.

baby, ive got it bad for you.

peter

ps i love seeing all the s.o. kids and overcast kids... it makes my heart race

pps just call me up and tell me everything is going to be okay. it came out of nowhere and i just want everyone to know our thoughts are with them.

www.clandestineindustries.com - get your body covered in our ideas... fall line s(w)oon

www.jeanae.com - get your hur cut

www.infectkids.com - get your website designed

- petey

July 13, 2005

Hey from vancouver. I just got a new belt buckle and made a hoody. Just heard we were number three on trl. It blows my mind that you have kept us on there this long. Haha. I totally brag to other bands about how much cooler our fans our. Yeah I know I'm lame. But you guys make me proud. Take us to number 1. Its in your hands and io definitely feel okay about that. I trust you.

Well I gotta go and talk about how shitty I thought the new fantastic four movie was.

Love can't save you. Only my new powers can.

Stay in touch and see you soon

Xo peter

July 15, 2005

Woah. I feel almost bad saying it cause we are putting it out, but trust me I had nothing to do with it: the new panic at the disco songs will change how your head feels. You guys are doing an amazing job. Me and ryan worked together on some lyrics for it and I have to say he put me to shame.

Also, I wanted to say rest in peace chuck. Our thoughts go out to your family. Please be respectful and keep conversations about this off of livejournals and messageboards. Thank you to mcr and ray toro for filling in for a show.

Jose canseco is a madman. So am I.

Though I am over hearing your thoughts on haircuts and pants. I'm over us trying to be perfect tens for your little eyes. We don't care what you think of us. Listen to a song and time your heartbeat. Let it be okay to fall asleep slow tonight. Think about a good friend. Think about god. Think about death. Think about someone elses hand clumsily on your belt in the dark. Think it will be okay.

No more rants

No more poetry

Not tonight.

True love for the believers. Thank you. Keep on l i/o ving

July 17, 2005

From the diary of a madman: I think possibly I have been letting things get to me too much lately. Or maybe I hadn't been enough before. Either way, I'm sorry. Maybe one day we can explain both of our perspectives and laugh out loud at how stupid we sounded when we worried about "girls pants and selling out". Sometimes its hard to look in the mirror and feel okay with the person looking back. I've been going through a lot, not like its an excuse but more like I feel you deserved to know.

In other news, I haven't gotten the new harry potter yet but as soon as I do well talk about how awesome you/it is.

July 19, 2005

“guysanddolls-”

i guess we are half way to retirement on TRL. how insane is that? it makes me kinda giggle a little bit. but in a good way. thanks for keeping us in there and up so high on it. it probably doesn't mean a whole lot to you and it doesn't get us invited to any cool parties but what it does is get our label excited- so we can get money to make a better video! we have a plan coming together for it. it's gonna be a bit R. Kelly (but none of the pedophilia), a bit star wars (but none of the jar jar binks), and a bit sixteen candles (but- oh wait- but nothing we love that thing). haha i probably just gave you the weirdest impression of our video. i had the best time on kimmel the other night. i wish they could air the whole show- i proposed to caprice- i think it made her gag hahahaha and joe did metal hands/wizard claw a bunch. it was just fun. the way our shows always used to be. we got some plans for the fall tour that are gonna make you swoon- especially our old friends. remember when i made you guys that mixed cd- instead of talking about whose gay and whose got what girlfriend- tell me the perfect mixed cd for me right now... mwah. im gonna update the buzznet in a bit with some new pics. r.i.p. that sunburst bass- im glad he had a chance to get his fifteen minutes before he died. hehe. it was kind of sad all warped. it wouldn't stay in tune cause of this huge crack in it. i have decided i hate playing on tv, i always come off wrong- if i smile too much it means i am obsessed with attention, if i don't smile enough it means i am having a bad day. i think i am going to make a shirt that says what mood i am in. mostly it will be shy/looking for a starbucks mood. or maybe when we have to play tv i think i will just hide behind a post and highfive korean tom cruise a bunch. i flew home to see my mom today, so sorry i missed talking to everyone in l.a. last night- she bought me new socks and cologne so i won't be the smelly kid in class anymore. i go on the internet too much. i don't know why the q and a on the site isn't working but it bothers me just as much as you. i have alot of answers just bubbling inside me- favorite color- hrm i dunno. do you have a gf- uh david from simple plan. does patrick have a gf- uh this one girl...

wow i need to sleep. keep voting. keep loving.

for the longer story: www.fueledbyramen.com/journal 

time to make my dogs circle pit.

peter

July 19, 2005

to the peanut gallery: just flew in on the red eye. it feels so amazing to be at home. Kimmy Jimmel (fix the spelling on that one hehe). was one of the best "tv" shows we've ever played. the crowd was amazing. contrary to popular belief my bass was smashed because it had an unfixable crack all the way through the neck- korean tom cruise looked at me before we played and said "this is it for this one" - so we figured we'd send it out with a bang. don't worry we had a funeral for it. i don't know the story about joe throwing his guitar, but i'm guessing it was a good one. i dunno the story about breaking the mic stand, it just looked like it was sitting there taunting me. besides i kinda wanted korean tom cruise to get a bit of screen time. i was in the worst mood all day/week, so low and playing that show just definitely brightened my day. seeing all of those happy faces... i'm definitely gonna write more later. i just wanted to thank all of the kids who came out or glued their sleepy little eyes to the screen late at night- i am sorry i didn't get to say hey and all, i had to go to the airport right when we finished.

xxoo

dont believe everything you read on the internet.

most of all what we write on it. haha.

peter

July 19, 2005

wrote you a goodbye note (you just wrote me off) on your arm when you passed out. bestfriends, exfriends- better off as lovers not the other way around. racing through the city in the back of yellow checkered cars. the takeoffs are the worst but the skin from your shoulder to your ear makes it all worth it. and im sorry the way my moods flicker on and off like old light on your porch, but i know you wouldn't have it any other way. sneaking in your window instead of out. the way you hold a cigarette cause you don't know what to do with your hands when we are sitting this close. the way the waists of pants feel better at the ankles. the way you always were my best excuse for calling in sick on everyone else. i miss you.

- petey

July 19, 2005

first to all the kids at kimmel! thank you so much. i know alot of kids travelled far away and got there really early. it suprised me how many people i recognized. you didn't go unnnoticed! alot of people emailed about smashing the bass and what kind of mood i was in. i wish they had shown the whole show. that show made me light up. i felt alive. i don't know why i break stuff, its cause im little and strange. i throw mic stands and spit water and lick joes guitar. and being able jump on stuff and touch your sweaty little arms, honestly it gives me chills as dumb as it sounds. its all how the chords and words feel when they come out. 

"you want a war, you've got a war but what are you fighting for?"

hey. here i am 35,000 feet off of the ground writing to you. i will upload this when i land i guess. i'm not even too sure what i am writing for. not breaking new ground or breaking down. just maybe i need to take a break from getting on here so much cause i tend to run my mouth/heart without thinking too much about it. sometimes i need (alright alright) slow down. anyway. all of the growth and changes get to me too. i guess everyone says you get what you wished for. but this was never a genie in a lamp for me. it's always just been me and my bestfriends. and sometimes it feels weird inside like being pulled apart. and maybe people like my smile and patricks voice and joe's spins and how nice andy is or they hate how short i am and i can't think of any of the stuff anyone hates about the other boys but i've heard it- and it just feels weird, cause we never did this thing so it would become what it has. we always just wanted to sit in between the speakers in your bedroom and spin you to sleep. and these kids are my bestfriends. we talk about sometimes just disappearing off of the face of the planet and just doing something else. and everyone kind of laughs but just for a minute it sounds like the best idea. we are so happy and in love with everyone who has stuck it out with us. and i'm SOrry if i seem distant at times, my head is just filled with ideas, good and bad- its funny when you keep letting the same person get to you over and over and over and over- i'll try and be better. after having my livejournal hacked, i kind of decided maybe i need to take a break from just sitting on the internet and trying to decipher every little thing out there and at the same time drop coded messages everywhere. anyway, more than anything. i just wanted to thank you for helping me bloom and become a better person, or at least want to become a person that you could actually look up to. its time to be the dreamer instead of the dream///

talk to you soon.

i am going to go read the entire new harry potter book right this second.

peter

July 21, 2005

If you like My Chemical Romance, Saves The Day, Midtown, New Found Glory, Taking Back Sunday, BrandNew or Fall Out Boy....and you want to see where it all came from. Find your way to www.hellfest.com and go see the band that started it all: Lifetime

Oh yeah. Then vote for us on TRL. We want to be your number one again.

P

July 21, 2005

you/we are safe and (se)cure. no more stealing glances like a thief.. taking chances without giving them back. and maybe i take advantage of that by staring too long. but if you wanted the stars i wouldn’t rest until i was able to pull every one down and name one after each twinkle in your eyes.. and hope you don’t frown when we run out of stars. i just love that spark of light i get to see when all the other lights are out. you have the best smile even better than mine. this is for your memories section, this is for forever. we’re kissing out dreams goodbye cause who needs dreams when we have this. we’re risking everything and nothing could be more worth it. 

i guess my point is, you make me wanna fall in love and get stuck - haha

July 21, 2005

lately i’ve been into believing fictional stories like the ones about me and you being happy. they’ve gotta be science fiction because how else can you have a monster fall in love with a boy with no heart? actually i’m pretty sure you have a heart, but i’m just as certain it’ll never be mine. i can tell you’re willing to be loved somewhere on the inside but that doesn’t do me any good when i’m still seeing things through thick curtains over windows and padlocked doors on the outside. bitter regrets, predictable forfeits. we lit a fire that was nothing but smoke and hot air. ashes. my hands are empty and you hold all the cards, kind of funny how you don’t even want them/me. the final nail in my coffin stabbed me in the heart - from my back. you once made my heart skip a beat, now you make it want to skip this. you’ve got salty mails ripping my wounds open that you’re telling me to let heal. Love is a mirage, you only think it’s there for so long..til you either wise up or die of hydration. love is the way to blow your brains out minus the gun, i swear. it’s the stupidest form of suicide cause you don’t die. and whatever doesn’t kill you only laughs at you for coming close enough to. sorry, it’s just the bitterness talking. ignore it/me. i’m just loose words hanging on the ends of your lips, even looser when i’m anywhere near your hips. poetry written from blistered fingertips and sleep deprived eyes that was better before the ink dried. He said, "I should have stayed with her,” and I should have stayed away. held together by paperclips and lies, a part of me is still trying to pretend i was (mis)hearing things but even the voices in my head aren’t that mean to me. and them “i’m sorry,” too late, i’m a better (re)actor than the one you’re being to convince me. i’m just convinced that telemarketers are the only people with more hang ups than me. you called this before you knew the number, and hung up before you got a response. tell me any of this will get me somewhere worth being without being left behind. i tried, i gave it/you my all, but all i can do is give up. i don’t tell you my insecurities so you can use them against me, but help me get over them. instead you said and did the worst thing you could do. worse than cheating to me, i hope you know. but whatever i don’t even know, i guess sometimes it takes losing what you had to see what you didn’t.

June 23, 2005

From the bottom of our blackened hearts. Thank you for making us number one on trl. Its hotter than hell in dallas right now and we want to go to a waterpark. Koreantom cruise isn’t helping it go down though.

We always knew how you felt. Now the world knows.

Honestly. Beaming from cheek to cheek.

July 24, 2005

Sometimes when you’re feeling this blue the right smile can save you.

July 26, 2005

We spend way too much time talking about this one band f.o.b. (Both in a good way and a bad way). So let's focus some time on bands that are really underappreciated:

Panic! At the Disco- I just heard the new record mixes. I must say. I want to live inside their songs. I think I could be happy.

Lifetime- I wouldn't have made it through highschool without this band.

The Plain White T's- people don't get it yet, but I think they will.

Gym Class Heroes- people don't get this one yet either. And that's sad cause I think years later they will be considered a groundbreaking band.

Quicksand- I don't even know what to say. Go buy "Slip".

July 30, 2005

“baby boy don't be blue. we've got big plans for you.”

ive been up for three days straight trying to get you off of my mind. but your stuck like super glue. what a mess. i can't say i mind it. i am in love with the show 24. it's obsession. summertime is running. sprinting. it kinda makes me feel sick to my stomach. come back. punched a wall so i couldn't type anymore. gotta make it stop. all these paragraphs have become rainchecks. promises on things that will never change. and oh god. the cameras flash at us in the dark. i miss the days of sweat dripping under the radar, just off of the grid. the grogshop. the fireside bowl. chainraction. the greendoor. the downtown. the arlington heights knights of columbus. the continental. the crystal ball never looks this clear looking into the past. im becoming vaguely disinterested in myself and all of my excuses and complaints. and you're pretty easy on the eyes- i never know how to end my conversations with you. i need a writer. i need a script. im getting desperate.

"we're just a wetdream for the webzines. make us hip, make us hip. make us scene"

July 30, 2005

Thanks for keeping us on trl! We have some cool ideas coming up and also a bit of news for our friends in u.k.... As soon as we have more details well let you know, as we hate to miss shows under any circumstances.

And j, happy birthday.

07/30/05 Q&A

question

so pete, since you wrote the lyrics for saturday, was it originally patrick and i attacked the laws of astoria? can you take off your pants with your tongue?

answer

yes. and we had to change it to make sense.

question

Patrick has the SEXIEST voice! Are you jealous?

answer

nah hes my best buddy. we dont get jealous of eachother.

question

HEYYY!! old Joely Moely has been saying some nice stuff bout you Petey Wenztyy!! hehe!! im glad you guys n GC know each other!! my 2 fav bands!!!! yeaaa!!! oh and me n my yahoo buddy wanna know if we can touch you?? lol MADD LUV GRACIE

answer

me and joel hung out a bunch the other day. he’s definitely a good guy.

question

In The Song Atavan Halen Does Brendon From Panic At The Disco Sing In It And If So Which Parts? YOU GUYS ROCK

answer

yes the prechorus “keep telling myself…”

question

haha i just read a fan fic about you and frankie from mcr going out.

answer

man, you wish that was fiction.

question

hey pete you meanie, a group of us from the message boards (the messageboard bitches as we like to call ourselves) were upset that you NEVER answered any of our questions, so we got together and asked you around 400 questions. they were good questions too, funny and random because we thought they could get your attention and make you laugh and hopefully just maybe youd answer at least one. but no, we were let down. and yet you answer such things as “patrick and andy are so sexy!” why is this pete? just why? its so disappointing.

answer

look all you needed to do was ask 400 questions to get one answered. ps. i love you even if you hate me.

question

I read a lot of band journals and you are mentioned in almost all of them. How/why are you so popular?

answer

i pay good money for all my friends.

question

Im so flaming pissed at you guys right now. “we only do it for the scars & stories, not the fame” what the fuck happened to that?! seems you sure are doing it for the fame, ditching your whole European tour for a stupid VMA. that is fucking ridiculous and i hope you all feel fucking shitty, but im sure you wont feel as shitty as the fans you made a commitment to who were so excited to see you and spent TONS of money on you. I hope MCR beats you for that VMA, they dont screw their fans over. ill never buy another piece of fall out boy merch or pay the money that i was going to pay to go on your overcastkids trip to texas, because you guys probably wont show up to that either. fuck you.

answer

i’m sorry you are angry. we feel terrible that we have let you and a bunch of our other fans over there angry. we miss you. we are going to make this up to you. hopefully, we’ll get another chance with you— its not about selling our merch or tickets- its a chance for a connection. i apologize. this was beyond our control.

question

do you think you are hot? do you think anyone is hot?

answer

i dont think i am hot. i definitely think alot of people are hot. smart ones, funny ones, pretty ones.

[itwasthereaminuteago]

|| 20:20 ||

Matt Murdock x Frank Castle

Tags/warnings: breakup, Matt's morality, Frank's stubbornness, sadness and angst, oh god I'm really sorry I'll make it up to you all sometime soon! 😭 Um, please let me know if you 'enjoyed' it by reblogging or commenting, thank you. 💔

.

.

"-the point is you didn't have to!" Matt strides into the apartment, ripping off his cowl and gloves and throwing them across the floor as if they're white hot and burning his skin.

Frank storms in after him. "Christ, it was him or you! You really think I'm gonna just stand by and let you get put down by some low grade asshole just to preserve your moral superiority?"

Matt paces a furrow into the floor, overwhelmed with adrenaline and emotion. "No, you don't get to bring this back to me. You said you'd stop, you told me you wouldn't go back to it. Promised, even."

"I thought the obvious exception was if it was you they were gunning for!?" Frank says with incredulous laughter.

Matt braces his hands on the back of the couch, knuckles flashing white with how hard he's gripping it. "You don't need to kill people, Frank. Sometimes you act like it's the easiest solution!"

"Act like its the easiest- are you fucking serious? You'd be dead if I hadn't taken the shot. Dead! Do you not see that?! You know me, you knew what you were taking on with this." He scrubs his hand over his face, he can't stop the words from pouring out now that the gloves were well and truly off in all respects.

"What about you? You don't fucking need to be Daredevil do you?"

"It isn't the same thing Frank. It's not a choice for me, this city needs Daredevil!"

"Killing ain't always a choice, sometimes it's a fucking necessity. And yeah that's my whole fucking point! If you're dead the city won't have you to protect it! Stop trying to make yourself into some sort of martyr, Matt. It doesn't suit you. People will die if you want to live, that's just how it is. We've just gotta accept what happened and move on."

Matt's still pacing, shaking his head. It's starting to hurt. "Yeah, thing is, I don't know if I can. If you really feel like you can go on that way then maybe… maybe-"

Frank stops, looks at him. "What are you sayin'?"

Matt shrugs, throwing up his hands. "I don't... I don't know." He can feel the sting of the tears waiting to fall already.

"Bullshit. You know. Go on, say it." It's the last thing Frank wants to hear but he needs the truth out of him.

Matt chokes. "I'm not-, I can't…" There's a monumental lump of lead in his chest, the words feel barbed and bloody waiting in his throat. He can hear the steady beat of Frank's heart. It's so loud it's almost bursting his eardrums.

"Just say it." Frank challenges him again, his brow furrowed. "You want to. Say we can't be together."

Matt hangs his head, sniffs.

Frank keeps on despite the voice in the back of his head telling him to shut up, to stop.

"Say you can't love someone like that. Someone like me."

"Frank, don't…"

"Don't what? I'm fucking making it easy for you." Frank could feel his heart shredding into a million pieces as he watches Matt give up fighting for them right before his eyes. What a dumb fuck he had been to think that they could ever actually work. Hindsight is 20:20.

"It's not easy." Tears are freely rolling down Matt's beautiful face now. "I love you." he sobs. Frank grabs his coat from where he left it on the back of the couch.

"No, you don't. You can't love a killer." He spares him a last glance, it feels like Matt's unseeing eyes meet his perfectly.

"You can't love me."

As the door closes and he listens to Frank's fading footsteps, Matt falls to his knees.

"I can't."

Sad Fratt tags: @mindidjarin @castlesnchurches @peterman-spideyparker @pastafossa @mattmurdocksscars @mattmurdockspainkink @marvelswh0re @munsonownsmyass

@hellskitchenswhore @pedrito-friskito @sweetieswiftie @briefcasejuice @shedaresthedevil @freshabogados @e-dubbc11 @father4giveme @idrinkcoffeeandobsess @imperfxctly-me @stress--relief @murnsondock @stupidthoughtsinwriting @whistle1whistle @tea-and-wine @emiemiemiii @imherefordeanandbones @m0nster-fvcker @creatingjana @echos-muses @lazyxsquirrel @messymissy @evilbubu @lucy-sky @anna-hawk

[babytoothbrain]

I decided to compile a list of all the books I reference on a regular basis irl, mostly classics because I thrive on validation from English teachers.

- The Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka (70 pages)

- The Trial by Franz Kafka (178 pages)

- Rebecca by Daphne Du Maurier (416 pages)

- No Exit by Jean Paul Sartre [Play] (60 pages)

- We Have Always Lived in The Castle by Shirley Jackson (146 pages)

- Electra by Euripides [Play] (44 pages)

- Alice the Sausage by Sophie Jabés (115 pages)

- Bless the Daughter Raised by a Voice in Her Head [Poetry] (96 pages)

- Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk (224 pages)

- Carmilla by Sheridan le Fanu (108 pages)

- Talk to Me Like the Rain and Let Me Listen by Tennessee Williams [Play] (15 pages)

- A Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger (234 pages)

- Things Have Gotten Worse Since We've Last Spoke by Eric LaRocca (120 pages)

- The Laugh of Medusa by Hélène Cixous [Essay] (20 pages)

- The New Me by Halle Butler (193 pages)

- The Myth of Sisyphus by Albert Camus [Essay] (120 pages)

- The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath (294 pages)

- Notes from Underground by Fyodor Dostoevsky (136 pages)

- The Secret History by Donna Tart (559 pages)

- Sputnik Sweetheart by Haruki Murakami (229 pages)

[seafoamchild]

january is a rough month. it feels like it's been january for like 3 weeks but it's only the 9th. the grey skies and general lack of color and warmth really gets me down. i feel like i'm always tired no matter how much i sleep. i feel so lacking in energy and motivation. and i feel so ugly too. i started using retinol on my face and i'm going through the "purge" period where my skin is breaking out. i really hope it'll get better after this. cuz having acne again is not chill. i'm not as self conscious about it as i once was, but i really do feel a little ugly. and i'm still reckoning with the changes in my body. i've definitely gained weight and sometimes i feel okay about it and other times (like now) i just can't believe it and i get into these shame spirals. i'm going to the gym a lot and still eating relatively well but i just feel very unattractive and blah.

i'm doing dry january too and i'm not sure if it's the right choice but i'm going to try it. it's only january 9th and i feel like it's been SO LONG and i want to drink SO BAD. no powders either. i have been thinking about my substance abuse issues for a while now and i think taking a break is necessary. i need to reassess my relationship with alcohol. i think getting out of the service industry would help a lot. i just hate that getting fucked up seems so necessary to have fun in so many situations. this is so hard.

a good thing is that i'm having a lot of fun with T. the more i get to know him the more i like him. he's funny, smart, willing to try new things, emotionally intelligent, social, kind, caring, doesn't take himself too seriously, a good listener, and a really loyal friend. he has a good heart. i'm really happy with him. we're doing dry january together and we've had so much fun going on adventures and cooking and watching weird documentaries. we're going to chicago next weekend and i'm really excited. he treats me the way i deserve to be treated and i hope i'm doing the same for him.

it just scares me a little because i still want to move to another city, even if it's just for a little while. and i don't want a boyfriend to hold me back. and i feel like it's too soon to ask if he wants to come with me. there are so many uncertainties. i tend to get so invested in relationships so quickly. so i need to talk about this in therapy.

i'm also still having the same issues with insomnia that i had with luke. every time we slept in the same bed i could not fall asleep. like at all. it's insane. i took a lunesta the last time T stayed over and i don't think i slept. like my body just will not let me be unconscious and i don't know why. it's absolutely maddening. i can't understand why this is happening and i'm so frustrated with people telling me to have a bedtime routine or to try meditating or take fucking melatonin. i know they're just trying to help but it's clearly a much deeper issue and i need professional help. my psychiatrist hasn't done anything helpful except prescribe me lunesta. i made an appointment with a sleep specialist but it's not til the third week of february. it's so fucking exhausting and annoying to want to just spend the night with T and i get up the next day feeling like absolute shit because i didn't sleep. i hate it i hate it i hate it!!!!!!!

also i was in barcelona for christmas. it was so much fun. it honestly felt strange to be back in that city. familiar but not. i spent a lot of time there in 2016 and it was weird to be like, oh i remember eating breakfast in that mcdonald's with my friend hashi more than seven years ago. or how i used to take the blue line on the metro to crazy denise's house where i was living. but this time we balled out and spent so much money on food! christmas dinner was the best meal i've ever had in my life. and we went to museums and went on a roadtrip and saw castles and drank a lot of vermouth and reveled in the sunlight and laughed until we cried every single day. i really loved that trip.

i was somewhat of a control freak on the trip because i planned everything, but no one else seemed that interested in planning anyway. i don't know. i've been thinking about my flaws as a person. i'm super laid back sometimes and then so controlling other times. i'm so impatient. i think i'm better than everyone sometimes. i need praise and reassurance. maybe i just have a big, fragile ego. sometimes i feel like i'm selfish. but you know, none of us are perfect. i am trying. and this is where i'm at.

[velvetporcelain]

The Lecture

We've got three feminine archetypes: The divine whore, Medusa - and me. What archetype am l?

- The Virgin Mary? - Thanks a lot, Trevor.

No, the faithful handmaiden. Always the bridesmaid, never the bride.

lt proves what Jung said all along. Myths and archetypes are alive and well and living in my apartment. As l stood beside the altar beside my sister and her husband to be, - it struck me that this ritual, a wedding ceremony, -- is the last scene of a fairy tale. They never say what happens after. That Cinderella drove the prince mad by obsessively cleaning the castle. They don't say what happens after because there is no after. The be-all and end-all of romantic love was ... Mike?

- Sex?

- You have sex on the brain.

- Marriage.

- But it wasn't always like that.

The th century had ''courtly love'', which had nothing to do with sex. The relationship between a knight and a married lady of the court ... And so they could never consummate their love. They rose above ''going to the toilet in front of each other'' love, -

- and went after something more divine.

They took sex out of the equation, leaving them with a union of souls.

Think of this. Sex was always the fatal love potion. Look at the literature of the time. All consummation could lead to was madness, despair or death. Experts, scholars and my Aunt Esther are united in one belief:

True love has spiritual dimensions, while romantic love is a lie. A myth. A soulless manipulation. And speaking of manipulation ... lt's like going to the movies and seeing the lovers kiss ...

The music swells, and we buy it, right?

So when my date kisses me, and l don't hear strings, l dump him.

The question is, why do we buy it? Because, myth or manipulation, we all want to fall in love. That experience makes us feel completely alive. Our everyday reality is shattered, and we are flung into the heavens.

lt may only last a moment, an hour, but that doesn't diminish its value.

We're left with memories we treasure for the rest of our lives.

l read, ''When we fall in love, we hear Puccini in our heads.''

l love that. His music expresses our need for passion and romantic love. We listen to La Bóheme or Turandot, or read Wuthering Heights, - or watch Casablanca, and a little of that love lives in us too.

So the final question is:

Why do people want to fall in love -

love -

- when it can have such a short run and be so painful?

- Propagation of the species?

- We need to connect with somebody.

- Are we culturally preconditioned?

- Good, but too intellectual for me.

l think it's because, as some of you may already know ...

While it does last, it feels fucking great.

-Barbra Streisand- The Mirror Has Two Faces

[itsthemysterykids]

Into the woods au

Once upon a time, in a far-off Kingdom There lay a small village at the edge of the woods

Lili: I wish (And in this village) More than anything (Lived a young maiden) More than life, more than jewels

(A carefree young lad)

Neil: I wish... More than life!

Mabel/Coraline: (And a parentless girl) I wish (With her friend)

Mabel: More than anything.

Coraline: More than the moon.

Mabel: I wish

Lili: The King is giving a Festival (more than life) (I wish) I wish to go to the Festival (More than riches) and the ball

Neil: I wish my cow would give us some milk (More than anything)

Mabel: I wish I had parents (please, pal) I want a mom and dad (squeeze, pal)

Lili: I wish to go to the Festival (I wish you could give us some milk)

Mabel: I wish I might have a home, I wish...

Priscilla: You wish to go to the Festival? (The poor girl's parents had died) You, Lili, the Festival? You wish to go to the Festival? The Festival? The King's Festival? (And now she lived with her stepmother) The Festival? Ha! (Who had two daughters of her own)

Pacifica: Look at your nails!

Siobhan: Look at your dress!

Pacifica: People would laugh at you

Lili: Nevertheless, I still want to go to the Festival!

Priscilla/Pacifica/Priscilla: And dance before the prince Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha (All three were beautiful of face, but vile and black of heart)

(And the boy's sister)

Winnie: I wish (Well, she was at her wit's end) I wish my bro were not a fool I wish my house was not a mess I wish the cow was full of milk I wish the walls were full of gold I wish a lot of things

Winnie: What in heaven's name are you doing with the cow inside the house?!

Neil: I thought if he got nice and warm, he might produce some milk.

Winnie: It's a she, how many times do I have to tell you only shes can give milk?

(Then there was a young boy who always wore a black cape)

Wybie: I wish It's not for me, it's for my granny in the woods A loaf of bread, please To bring my poor old hungry granny in the woods Just a loaf of bread, please

Priscilla: Lili, if you can pick up these lentils, and finish your chores on time, then you may go to the ball with us. Come along ladies.

Pacifica: Yes, mother

Siobhan: Good luck

Lili: Come, little birds Down from the eaves, and the leaves, over fields, out of castles and ponds

Neil: Now, squeeze, pal

Lili: Quick, little birds Flick through the ashes Pick and peck but swiftly sift through the ashes, into the pot.

Winnie: Now listen to me well, Neil, Milky-White must be taken to market

Neil: Sis, no, he's the best cow in the world.

Winnie: Was, she has been dry for weeks now with no food or money, and no choice but to sell her!

Neil: But Milky-White's my best friend!

Winnie: Look at her There are bugs on her dugs There are flies in her eyes There's a lump on her rump Big enough to be a hump (but) We've no time to sit and dither While her wither's wither with her And no one keeps a cow for a friend Sometimes I wonder what's goin' on in that head of yours.

Wybie: Into the woods, it's time to go, I hate to leave, I have to, though Into the woods, it's time, and so, I must begin my journey Into the woods and through the trees to where I am expected, ma'am Into the woods to grandmother's house Into the woods to grandmother's house

Pepa: Are you certain of your way?

Wybie: The way is clear, the light is good I have no fear, nor no one should The woods are just trees, the trees are just wood I sort of hate to ask it, but do you have a basket?

Pepa: Yes, we do.

Camilo: I don't suppose you're planning on saving some for the rest of us.

Felix: Ah, leave the boy be. Now, don't stray and be late, alright?

Camilo: Yeah, stay out for as long as you’d like. *Wybie takes his arepa* Dios-!

Pepa: Leave it.

Camilo: You always let him steal seconds!

Wybie: Into the woods and down the dell, the path is straight, I know it well Into the woods, and who can tell what's waiting on the journey? Into the woods to bring some bread to granny who is sick in bed Never can tell what lies ahead, for all that I know, she's already dead But into the woods Into the woods, into the woods to grandmother's house, and home before dark

Priscilla: Lili! Get up here!

Lili: Fly, birds, back to the sky...

Priscilla: We're waiting!

Lili: Back to the eaves, and the leaves, and the fields, and the-

Pacifica: Hurry up and do my hair, Lili Are you really wearing that?

Siobhan: Here, I found a little tear, Lili Can't you hide it with a hat?

Lili: You look beautiful.

Siobhan: I know (she means me), no she didn't

Lili: Mother said be good, father said be nice That was always their advice So be nice, Lili, good, Lili Nice, good, good, nice (tighter!)

What's the good of being good if everyone is blind Always leaving you behind? Never mind, Lila, kind, Lila Nice, good, nice, kind, good, nice

Pacifica: OW! Not that right! CLOD!

*Back at the bakery, there’s a knock at the door*

Mabel: Who might that be?

Coraline: The last loaf was just sold!

Mabel: ... It's the witch from next-door.

*Agatha makes her dramatic entrance*

Coraline: We have no bread.

Agatha: I don't want your parents' bread.

Mabel: Then what is it you wish?

Agatha: It's not what I wish, it's what you wish. Still no family to call your own? Well, it'll stay like that. Unless you do exactly as I say. In three days time, a blue-moon will appear. Only then can the curse be undone.

Mabel: What curse?

Agatha: The one I placed on your bloodline.

Mabel: What are you talking about?

Agatha: In the past, when you were no more than a babe. Your father brought his young wife and you to your old cottage. They were a lovely couple. But not lovely neighbors. You see, your mother was with child. And she developed an unusual appetite. She admired my beautiful garden, and she told your father that what she wanted more than anything in the world, was Greens, greens, nothing but greens Parsley, peppers, cabbages and celery Asparagus, and watercress, and fiddleferns, and lettuce

He said, "All right", but it wasn't, quite 'Cause I caught him in the autumn in my garden one night He was robbing me, taking from me Rooting through my rutabaga Raiding my arugula and ripping up the rampion My champion! My favorite! I should have laid a spell on him right there!... I could have turned him into stone. Or a dog... Or a chair. But I let him have the rampion, I'd lots to spare. In return, however, I said, "Fair is fair. You can let me have the baby that your wife will bear... And we'll call it square"

Mabel: I had a sister?

Agatha: No, but you had a brother.

Mabel: Where is he?!

Agatha: He's mine now! And you'll never find him. Small price to pay for what else your father stole from me. It cost me my youth, my beauty. My mother warned me. She would punish me with the curse of ugliness if I ever lost any of them.

Coraline: Lost what?

Agatha: The beans (beans?) The special beans I'd let him go, I didn't know he'd stolen my beans I was watching him crawl back over the wall When bang! Crash! A lightning flash!...

Well, that's another story, never mind, anyway At last the big day came I made my claim "Oh, don't take away the baby" They shrieked and screeched But I did And I hid her where she'll never be reached

Your mother cried, and your father died When for extra measure, I admit it was a pleasure I said, "Sorry, I'm still not mollified" And I laid a little spell on them You too, dear. That your family tree would end... With you.

Mabel: How could you do that?!

Agatha: And when your father died, your mother deserted you. Your mother was no mother, so why should you get to be one? Now there's no more fuss, and there's no more scenes And my garden thrives, you should see my nectarines! But I'm telling you the same I tell Kings and queens Don't ever never ever mess around with my greens! Especially the beans

Neil: But why do we have to go to the next village?

Winnie: Because everyone in this village knows the cow hasn't given a drop of milk in weeks.

Neil: That's cheating!

Winnie: We're starving, Neil! Can't you understand that? Now, you're not to accept less than five pounds for her. Are you listening to me?

Neil: Yes.

Winnie: How much are you to ask?

Neil: No more than five pounds.

Winnie: Less than five!

Winnie: Into the woods, the time is now, we have to live, I don't care how Into the woods to sell the cow, you must begin the journey Straight to the woods and don't delay, we have to face the marketplace Into the woods to journey's end.

Neil: Into the woods to sell a friend.

Agatha: You wish to have the curse reversed? I'll need a certain potion first Go to the woods and bring me back

One, the cow as white as milk Two, the cape as black as ebony Three, the hair as brown as bronze Four, the slipper as pure as gold

Bring me these before the chime of midnight In three day's time tis' then the blue moon reappears Which comes but once each hundred years Bring 'em, and I guarantee a child as perfect as child can be Go to the wood! *Dramatic exit*

Priscilla: Ladies, our carriage waits

Lili: Now may I go to the Festival?

Priscilla: The Festival? Darling, those nails, darling, those clothes Lentils are one thing, but, darling, with those You'd make us the fools of the Festival and mortify the prince!

Lili: The Festival lasts three nights. Surely, you could let me be there for one of them.

Priscilla: The King is trying to find his son a wife, not a scullery maid. We must be gone, go!

*The stepfamily leaves*

Lili: I wish.

Coraline: *Finds beans in a coat pocket* Beans? These must be the witch's beans, we'll take them with us

Mabel: We?

Coraline: Yeah.

Mabel: You're not coming, it's not safe out there.

Coraline: I can help you.

Mabel: No, I can do this on my own. The spell is on my house, only I can lift the spell.

Coraline: Well, yes, the spell is on your house. But we can lift the spell together, so the spell is on our house!

Mabel: Now tell me, what am I to return with?

Coraline: Ugh, God! You don't remember? The cow as white as milk, the cape as black as ebony The hair as brown as bronze, the slipper as pure as gold

Mabel: The cow as white as milk, the cape as black as ebony The hair as brown as bronze, the slipper as pure as gold

Lili: I still wish to go to the Festival (the cow as white as milk) But how am I ever to get to the Festival? (The cape as black as ebony, the hair as brown as bronze) I know, I'll visit mother's grave, the grave at the willow tree (the slipper as pure as gold) And tell her I just want to go to the King's Festival (the cow, the cape, the slipper as pure as gold, the hair!)

Mabel/Coraline: Into the woods, it's time to go, it may be all in vain, I know Into the woods, but even so, I have to take the journey.

Coraline: Into the woods, the path is straight, you know it well.

Mabel: But who can tell?

Coraline: Into the woods to lift the spell.

Lili: Into the woods to visit mother.

Winnie: Into the woods to sell the cow.

Neil: To get the money.

Lili: To go to the Festival

Wybie: Into the woods to grandmother's house Into the woods to grandmother's house

Coraline/Mabel/Lili/Neil/Wybie: The way is clear, the light is good I have no fear, nor no one should The woods are just trees, the trees are just wood No need to be afraid there.

Mabel: There's something in the glade there

Into the woods without delay, but careful not to lose the way Into the woods, who knows what may be lurking on the journey? Into the woods to get the thing that makes it worth the journeying

Priscilla: Into the woods to see the King.

Neil: To sell the cow.

Mabel: To make the potion

To see, to sell, to get, to bring To make, to lift, to go to the Festival

Into the woods Into the woods Into the woods Into the woods Into the woods Into the woods

Into the woods, then out of the woods To see, to sell, to get, to bring To make, to lift, to go to the Festival Into the woods, then out of the woods, and home before dark

Close Curtains!