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mythgrippa-blog · 1 year ago

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Another morning

Alright, where do I start. Perhaps with the app I've been working on with my team. Alright, where do I start with that... think think think...

I'm the technical lead for university year long project (its actually 6 months, so I don't know why they would call it a year project) and its essentially a capstone project for my computer science degree.

My team is composed of 5 people, including myself and 4 of those members I've been in another terminal war simulator C++ project with last year and the other member I've met and teamed up with this year.

When we first decided to team up, I didn't want to be group leader again because I'm simply not a leader! Its way too much pressure having to manage people and making sure everyone is doing their work, and in hindsight I still think someone else in my group should have been a leader because I don't like these responsibilities! I'm a techie, an introvert! PICKING ME TO BE A LEADER?!?!? ARE YOU INSANE??

But nobody else wanted and I hate how everyone thought I was just playing hard to get, bro I'm simply not like that! But alas I gave in since no one bothered to step up, the only leadership quality I think I have is my refusal to fail and my clear sight to a goal. And also my ability to go beyond my limits even if detrimental to my mental health

So, what was the project that I've someone ended up as a leader for? Well, the project was an event photo sharing app and our client was a software engineer from a popular tech company in my country.

We met up with them, discussed ideas for the project, tried my best to encourage my team for the most grueling 5-6 months of their lives and got to work!

Being a project manager/leader is super hard like oh my goodness, I had to make sure there were constant meetings and that we followed scrum agile framework, it was really hard managing because getting people to do work is not one of my skill sets, I've always been a solo leveler but now I have to tell others what to do. Its hard to enforce accountability for work not done when your members are also friends.

What I wanted for my team is for them to have fun, learn something that can make them more valuable in the long run and ultimately build something they're proud of. Those are the values I tried for but its very hard if nobody listens to me and it feels like a chore to them.

My role was mostly technical leading as in most of the technical decisions were made by me, and also technical support as in if you ran into an issue come to me and I'll help or lead you to someone who can help, and I was also DevOps as in I built the whole CI/CD pipeline for our project with automatic builds, tests and deployments (I've never done this before so I had to learn and learn a lot of github actions), I was also sort of doing full stack (backend/service engineer and integration engineer and ui engineer) and also involved in training an AI model which in the end didn't work but we found a nice python solution. As you can imagine, I was having a lot on my plate? more like table and all had to be done

The team focused towards the 4 demos we had, each demo was a sort of deliverable where we had to have a certain percentage of the app requirements done. It was exhausting work, I had to work so many nights and give up weeks of holidays and recess to get it done, I started eating more and sleeping less, moving less, always on my computer, coding and designing, day in day out, sacrificing family time to make progress for the sake of the project, why? because I don't want to fail, it was no longer for sake of making the best app in the world, somewhere down the line of development it was no longer for the fun of it, it was for survival. This felt like a Herculean challenge, as if I was Sisyphus or something, it was all I could think about. I thought this project would finally be the time I enjoy myself but it ended with me having to rush to meet deadlines. Pushing myself to the very limit.

I won't lie, I was starting to feel hate inside my heart because I was burning myself out. Before the project began, one of the assistant lecturers mentioned that the projects will be tough and that it may ruin friendships, I didn't think much of it but now I'm just shook at my team. Not because deadlines weren't being met but because I was being ignored, I felt like I was being an inconvenience, like I was just taking time away from them and when the demo was getting closer and then all so suddenly they look at me like why things weren't finished. I'm sorry but we have deadlines for a reason!!! And now we have to do crunch time and I look like a bad guy.

But those feelings so mostly dissipated in our 4th demo because that was it, our supposed final demo, at least where the app is supposed to be at 100% complete. We finished all of the required features and tried adding extra, and what was the result? Well you can go and see for yourself

This is what we were presenting, the presentation went alright, better than the first 3 but I wasn't satisfied because there were some features I wanted to add but couldn't since we had to make sure the parts we did have were working. We were presenting to our lecturers, not the module lecturers but lecturers for the whole computer science degree, so we were a bit shaky.

The presentation went alright, two of my members have a dynamic, one of my engineers had a Steve Jobs like talent and the other was a quick learner and were very good at hiding their fears. The lecturers asked us questions, there's something I noticed about these questions... they were ignited by our presentation, but thats something for later. The questions were essentially based on what they taught us in the last couple of years since the degree began in first year and as final years were we able to apply what they taught us.

We were able to answer most of the questions with confidence, however one of my lecturers wasn't happy with our implementation of microservices. But other than that, it wasn't anything major, we did our best. And now we can stop working on the project.

There's a fifth demo in case our 4th demo didn't go well, meaning that we have to make improvements to the app, but we haven't got the results yet. In the mean time, we are focusing on our other modules.

Well I think I've said enough about the project. I'll write more later on what I'm going to do with this new free time because its crazy how much free time we have without this project. I am happy my team was able to push themselves, I've always wanted to be part of a development team where we all code and eat pizza together while working on the app. Discussing ideas with each member and how they should be implemented. This experience was valuable and I don't believe it would have been possible if I wasn't the group leader or with these lovable goof balls.

I do have anger issues, but the normal amount of anger, you know when your buttons get pressed so much, I was the only technical support! I felt like an overworked gateway service! Oh my goosh I was just mad. But hey, there's a good and bad to this, all you need to know I won't be doing any more group leaderly stuff hopefully and I'm not going to be involved in software development for a while and I'm retiring. Its off to cybersecurity now.

I'll let you know how the results are, but my next post will come out shortly

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somethinglikelife · 2 years ago

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I had some time to think this weekend

I realized that I am too cultured for this area of the state, but not cultured enough for a big city (not that I would want to live in a big city, I have social anxiety, and large crowds are a pain for me). I kind of realized this while hanging out with my roommate's family, they're all younger than me, but we went to see the holiday lights and just get out of the apartment for a bit.

That was kind of a mistake, I peopled way too much, with people who have vastly different views than I do, hell, all of them want kids too. I have a ton of mental issues (thank you for those Mom and Dad) that make it so I don't want to have any of my own. I love babysitting, because I can enrich their lives a little (I'm the kind that will read undisneyfied fairy tails to the kids, take them to gardens or parks before sitting them in front of a TV, if my bad knee will let me). I will turn every little outing into a learning experience instead of just relying on the public school system to do it. And really where I am, our schools are barely funded because it's not a rich white city, it's a crumbling former rail town. They're trying to bring back the trains, but to get anywhere in this town without spending all day traveling by bus to go a whole 2 miles, you need a car.

As much as I would like to see it improve, this town feeds off your creativity and leaves you hollow. I used to be able weave stories and write two or three thousand words a day, now, I'm lucky if I can even write a couple hundred. Which is why I'm glad that the roommate and I might be moving. Though after that move, I might move again, I'll be saving up to get a van, thinking a work van to remodel as a small home so I can travel. Which means at some point my blog may lean more that way, to travel in my 50's if I can swing it.

In other words, kind of looking at things that I can do away from people for the most part. Not sure if it's my anti-social nature, just being an introvert (something that while looking back, kinda happened when I was in first grade,) or if it's the fact that the person who wants to me my travel companion, is someone that I don't think I could stand being in the car with for more than 4 hours at a time. I love my roomie like a sister, but she has quirks that drive me nuts. Also, who thinks that getting to the destination is the only reason to go somewhere. I may have been raised weird, by a father who was and still is an amazing photographer, that taught me that the journey is more important than the destination. Which may be why when I can, I take all back roads to get somewhere, not only do you see more, you experience more. I love going through farmlands, seeing cows, horses, even the fields. When you go through Amish country, you get to see the buggies and the air just smells a little fresher (Again will be showing I'm a little weird, I actually like the smell of organic fertilizer (ya know manure) in the spring and fall with freshly tilled soil. There's just life in the smell okay, unlike of the smells of the city, which feels heavily manufactured, and tainted with toxins.

I encourage you all to try a trip out of a city some time if you can. If you can't drive, go by bus, choose a destination that isn't on a highway, you might end up at your destination for over a day, so plan accordingly, but really, those small towns can be amazing.

And yeah I realized I rambled for this post. I promise that not all of them will be rambling on like this. I tend to get that way when it's closer to Yule. As an introverted Asexual during holiday season, it's one of those things that I wonder if my path is the right one, since I'm just pushing myself more into obscurity with being happy to enjoy the holidays without a human partner around.

#Observations of a GenXer #introspection #political #rambling #rant

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destinyimage · 2 years ago

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‘Tens of Thousands’ Saved During International Meetings

Since 2006, Pete Sulak, a chiropractor and self-described charismatic Christian, has taken his message of healing of body and soul far from his Knoxville office.

In December, Sulak plans to travel 8,400 miles to Andhra Pradesh, a southern state in India, through a nonprofit he founded called Matthew 10 International Ministries. He said he takes no salary from the ministry.

“I preach a simple message,” said Sulak. “God created a perfect world, sin destroyed it. Jesus fixed it, and you can receive it.”

Sulak said he will preach in English with a translator to Telagu, the local dialect.

“At a recent festival, I preached 300,000 people in four nights, and the largest crowd was 130,000 people,” said Sulak. “We were able to see tens of thousands of people give their lives to Christ. We've been able to plant 15 new churches, and many of the existing ones will grow.”

In the Knoxville, Tennessee area, Matthew 10 International Ministries sponsors local Christian movies, Sulak said.

“We do that just to be a blessing to the community,” said Sulak. “We pay for it, provide free food for everybody and invite our patients and people around the community to come. I usually present the gospel at the end.” Their next sponsored movie is “The Remaining,” at West Town Mall on Sept. 4.

Overseas, Sulak partners with Manna Group of Ministries in India, which runs 42 children's homes. Matthew 10 finances about 150 of the 5,000 children they house, Sulak said. He expects to see the children in December on his next visit. “They call me daddy, and I don't deserve that at all,” he said.

“Dr. Pete Sulak has preached in nine festivals as well as assisting in support for children homes that we run,” said Manna Group chairman, the Rev. Sudarshan Jyoti Komanapalli. “He has also assisted in building of a children’s home, and in some remodeling projects in some of our homes. He has also introduced us to others who have donated to our work.”

Sulak said he never thought he’d be a chiropractor, or a preacher, growing up in Minnesota.

“I was going to be a coach like my dad and grandfather. But once I started dating, I realized I needed to make more money, honestly. We had a family friend who was a chiropractor and offered to pay my expenses if I’d go into business with him.”

Sulak graduated from Northwestern Health Science University in Bloomington, Minn., and had an internship in Morristown, Tenn.

"I was expecting to go back to Minnesota, but the door closed there, which we thought was strange. So we began to look around here. And on the last day we were driving from Maryville to Oak Ridge, took a wrong exit in Farragut and said, ?This is it.' "

Sulak said he knocked on 11,000 doors, 10 hours a day for four months to drum up business in 2002 in West Knoxville. “That’s hard for an introvert. People see me on stage, and don’t believe it. They don't realize my wife's the fun one. I’m shy.”

Sulak’s wife, Stephanie, stays home with their four sons, ranging from ages 5 to 15. The whole Sulak family followed “Dr. Pete,” as he calls himself, to Knoxville. His mother and sister work in his office, and his brother is a chiropractor in North Knoxville. “My dad helps drive the kids around,” he said.

Although he grew up in a Christian home, Sulak said it was a mission trip to Africa in 2004 that changed his life. “I received the baptism of the Holy Spirit. My prayers changed because I had an encounter with the Lord, and realized my life was not my own, and I’m meant to share the Gospel.”

He has no formal training in preaching. “No, I just love Jesus,” he said. “I’m just a chiropractor in Knoxville, Tennessee. My Jesus didn't come to condemn the world, but to save it.”

Sulak prays with his patients, but said any healing or saving of souls is not his own doing.

Originally posted at Knox News, by Rebecca D. Williams.

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scentedinksandwhackedseals · 6 months ago

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i'm sorry that happened to you at your summer camp, that especially sucks that it was at a place you loved. camp is so special and it's awful that that counselor and your cabinmates had to mess that up for you.

the birches program is for teens who have almost aged out of camp but still want to be like normal campers. if you want a bit more responsibility, there's also the CIT (counselor in training) and LIT (leader in training) programs. i was a CIT last year and that was also great, if a bit more stressful. but at birches, you live in platform tents—with three people to a tent at most—at a campsite a little ways away from main camp. (there’s a lot of birch trees by the dock so that why it’s called birches.) you do activities both at the campsite and at main camp (there's a lot of walking back at forth). you also have a super lax schedule so you get to sleep in and have a lot more say in what activities you do. it's also nice because you get to live with a smaller group of people, separate from main camp, so you're kind of like a family. i got closer to the people at birches than i had been with any of my cabins when i was at main camp. also, sharing a sleeping space with fewer people helped me with connection too. the first time i did it, i was in a tent with two fellow introverts, so it was a little awkward but still nice. but the second time, i was with two extroverts, one of whom i had already been in a cabin with. so that was a lot more fun and i got closer with them. but both times i felt like i was really part of the group. we had our own inside jokes and everything. and the whole thing was so fun and i miss it.

20. What/who do you miss?

i really miss getting new content from the boys every day. and i miss my old friends from middle school. i also miss being able to easily get good grades, like i did when i was younger and also first semester sophomore year. and i miss my grandma's house. she moved and i never got to say goodbye to the house. and i miss summer camp but i'm gonna be there soon enough. just not as a camper so i'll miss that. specifically being in the birches program. that was one of the best times of my life. so i miss a lot of things. i can think of even more but i'll stop here.

#wow i just wrote a whole paragraph about birches. i’m really not surprised actually.#aida!#ask game

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keldae · 5 years ago

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Update for Kel’s Quarantine Saga (under the cut):

1. First off, the best possible news, is that my manager has officially said “Don’t worry about applying for EI, we’re still paying you like normal.” I’d like to take back all my bitching about working retail, because right now, I LOVE MY JOB.*

*it probably helps that we’re a non-essential store that sells steel-toe boots and PPE and not, y’know, food or hand sanitizer or TP. But still, I’m SO relieved on that front. I do wonder if the store’s even open, considering I’m out until AHS says otherwise, one of the other FT’ers just got back from Cuba and BETTER have her ass in quarantine, and the other FT’er has two little kids and no school/daycare.

2. My city has declared a State of Emergency, so right now, virtually everything is closed: libraries, parks, rec centres, theatres, etc. All K-12 schools and daycares (and I think all the universities) have been shut down indefinitely. All events are on-hold until further notice. Most of the grocery stores and malls have reduced their hours, and some stores in the mall where Roomie #1 works are closed entirely. Needless to say, my 501st and Rebel Legion groups have suspended all trooping. I’m not surprised by this -- I’m not thrilled, but I get why they’re doing it, and really hoping it works to keep the curve flat.

3. Canada is closing the borders to non-residents, and being hella picky on the Canadians that it does allow onto planes to come back home with symptoms. Again, not surprised by this... but anxious since my Mum, who is a flight attendant, was exposed to the plague on a flight last week, and now has symptoms... and is stuck in the UK in quarantine in the crew hotel. They’re not doing tests anymore over there since it’s too great a pandemic, so they’re just going off symptoms. I’m REALLY hoping she gets cleared to get out on a rescue flight soon, instead of potentially being stranded for a month. (Oh, and her airline has also announced they’re cutting ALL international flights. She’s worried about if she’ll still have a job at the end of the month. Here’s hoping her company seniority works in her favour.)

3.5 Symptoms notwithstanding, my mum is doing okay, all things considered. She’s so over the cough and fever, and she’s going mental from cabin fever, but she has friends sending her meals and treats, and the hotel manager is checking in on her every couple of hours. I’m still worried, but a little less worried since she’s in good hands on that side of the pond. <3

4. My roommates are apparently skittish as hell, while I’m in quarantine and waiting to A- be tested (AHS is swamped) and B- get the results of said test (They’re restricting tests here too, but I qualify since I was exposed to an international traveller with a respiratory illness). Roomie #1 has relocated herself and her pet bunny to her parents’ place until I get results in, and I’m not sure what Roomie #2 is doing.

5. Today’s particular ordeals have involved getting the run-around by Costco’s pharmacy and trying to figure out when I’ll be able to actually place an order for one of my prescriptions to be refilled (and then getting my dad to pick it up for me, which hasn’t been a problem yet).

6. Still waiting for AHS to let me know about when and where I can go for swab testing. They’ve got new drive-through testing stations set up, I just need the go-ahead to drive to one. They said they’d call in 24-48 hours from isolation beginning, and I think I’m on Hour #46? But considering they’re up to their ears in this, I’m being patient.

I’m doing okay still, if fretting about Mum and the possibility of me being a plague carrier. My symptoms are still mild, just a nagging chest cough and some tightness in my chest (not enough to be anxiety-inducing, just enough to be annoying, like I can’t inhale right, yaknow?) I have a grocery order being delivered on Thursday, and have enough in my house to hold me through until then. I’m stocked up on most of the essentials (... except wine, alas. But I’m fine on TP and soap. ;) ), and have both the Internet and a pile of books to keep me entertained. (Part of me wants to be doing costume work, but with Calgary Expo likely being postponed, not really feeling the urge to work -- not to mention my work area is in a somewhat-shared area of the house and I don’t want to make Roomie #2 anxious. Maybe I’ll actually finish slip-stitching Theron’s pants like I’ve been meaning to for MONTHS...)

... and part of me is kinda enjoying the “mandated, socially-sanctioned recluse behaviour that I demonstrate literally any other time anyway”, not gonna lie. ;)

#Kel's adventures in quarantine #COVID-19 #who knows? maybe I'll actually get through some prompts that have been languishing in my inbox for ages!#or do artsings!#we introverts have been training our whole lives for this #I might just have to have an LOTR marathon #for reasons

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writerdream22 · 4 years ago

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requested by: no one, but I sincerely hope you like this anyways ✨🌻💛

pairings: levi ackerman x wife!reader, eren jeager x reader (platonic), hange zoe x reader (platonic), erwin smith x reader (platonic), etc.

warnings: none

taglist: @randomfandomimagine (let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!)

a/n: I know I haven't been posting in a long while, and that I have lots and lots of pieces to work on. I've been watching aot for a while, and I wanted to write something regarding that fandom

You and Levi had met when you were just teenagers; you were the daughter of a scouting legion commander, and Erwin's new friend had caught your attention

Just like an ordinary introvert person, you were really shy, and it was Erwin himself who introduced you to Levi, Farlan and Isabel

“They seem like nice people, you know?”

“Uh?”

“The kids from the underground city. You should go introduce yourself”

“They're criminals, Erwin. I won't go talk to them. They will surely snob me as soon as they see me”

“Trying doesn't hurt. And if they say something, just use the moves you learnt while training.”

“If you say so”

You were intimidated, especially by Levi. But it seemed that he was willing to talk to you

“Hi, uhm, my name is— my name is y/n”

“We know who you are”

“Erwin told us lots about you! I'm Isabel, and these two boys are Levi and Farlan”

“I just wanted to know if the three of you needed someone to show you around”

“Kids, cadet y/l/n will show you around. All right?”

“Yes sir!”

You immediately thought that it was a bad idea to be left alone by yourself, with people you didn't know. Erwin knew well that you felt anxious around newcomers, but he sincerely wanted you to have some friends.

The tour went all right; you and Isabel had immediately gotten along, while it took you a few months to warm up to Levi and Farlan

As time went on and you were slowly becoming autonomous, people started to think that you and Levi were actually related and that you had somehow been separated at birth; you were both quite short, with dark hair and light-colored eyes

Not to mention that you both loved tea

When you became part of the scouting legion, you were happier than ever even though you were fully aware of the risks you were taking

When Isabel and Farlan died, you and Levi were devastated. You had set aside your grief, and stayed by Levi's side

“What are you doing here?”

“Couldn't sleep. You?”

“Neither could I. I was making some tea, do you want some?”

“Yeah, Levi, thank you”

“Would you like to talk about — about that?”

“No, not really”

“Oh, well— can I braid your hair instead? It calms down the two of us. Me and Isabel had so much fun doing that, remember?”

“Tch, I hated it. But yeah—braid my hair, y/n”

You and Levi shared a sweet moment. You didn't talk, nor you wanted to, but you comforted each other just with your presence.

As time went by, you and Levi got extremely close. The two of you became corporals, giving Erwin the condition of always having to work together no matter what

The only people that the two of you became friends with, or just cared about, were Hange and your squad

One day, while you and the other corporals of the scouting legion were having breakfast, Hange made a sarcastic remark about how you and Levi were close

“Can't you just leave each other alone for a minute?”

“We just care about each other, and we respect our boundaries”

“Seems like you have some— that you share romantic feelings for each other, eh? ”

“What do you mean, Hange?”

“Yeah, this is ridiculous. Let's go, y/n, we need to prepare for our next mission”

Hange's words really sparked something in your soul. You started to think abot the relationship that you and Levi had, the special treatment you reserved for each other even though you were famous for being strict...

One day, you decided to confront him

“Hi”

“Hi, y/n, is everything all right?”

“Yeah. Have you— have you thought about what Hange said?”

“Yeah...”

“I did too, by the way”

“And what did you want to tell me about it?”

“She was right. I do have romantic feelings for you, but I need to know that you feel the same before I pour my heart out to you”

“Levi, please say something”

“I don't just like you, y/n, I love you. And now, come here—”

Then and there, he kissed you. Your first kiss, just like you had imagined.

You decided to keep your relationship a secret for a while, as you didn't want Hange to know that she was right. She found out anyways, and she told everyone.

After a few years, you decided to get married. You were extremely happy, and you couldn't ask for anything else in the world.

“With this ring, I give you my soul. With this ring, I put my trust in you, and hope to live by your side until we grow old. Meeting you was one of the best things that could have ever happened to me. I wanted a splinter of happiness in that pathetic, dark void I had grown accustomed to call life. Meeting you fulfilled my dream of becoming a better man. With this ring, you make me happy, and I hope that I'll make you happy as well. Meeting you made me learn what true love is. I love you, y/n, always and forever”

As a team, Levi was deemed as more important by your superiors. Sometimes, they didn't even address themselves to you and just talked to your husband.

“Sir, my wife here also contributed to the mission. I think that you should congratulate yourself to her, as well”

Levi always looked out for you, making sure that every single detail was to your liking. As everyone knew, he showed his vulnerable self to only you, and you were grateful for the trust he had given you.

“Are you ok, darling?”

“Yeah. You're still working on those papers, eh?”

“I just have to sign a few things, then I have to meet up with Erwin. Tch, this stuff is so tiring sometimes”

“We can take a walk around the compound later, if you want. Then, I can make you some tea”

“That would be fantastic, y/n. You're really the best wife in the world”

“I'm your only wife, Levi”

The whole situation that emerged from the apparition of abnormal titans stressed you out, quite a lot nevertheless. Levi had noticed it, and saw that you were more nervous than usual. He made sure to always ride by your side, to always be able to keep his eye on you.

He knew what stress did to you. It made you more vulnerable, more subject to distractions, and he didn't want to lose you at all.

During one of your many missions, where you had the unpleasant surprise of meeting the female titan, you got severely hurt.

“What were you thinking?!”

“I wanted to save our squad! I wanted to save Petra, Oluo, everyone! But I couldn't!”

“You risked your life, y/n! You could have died, you know that?”

“I sure do, Levi! That's what soldiers do! They die, after having done something good for humanity, and I lived a pretty decent life! I got married, I had friends, but I am alive now! I am all right, it's just routine”

“You can't just do things recklessly. I can't stand losing you. Not now, not ever. I want to build a family with you, I want to live my life with you and only you. You can't die, you got it?”

“Yes, Levi. I'm sorry”

“Let me get you some tea, now”

That's when you fully understood that Levi loved you. You had managed to warm up his heart with your sweet and kind words, and he'd managed to conquer yours with just a look in your eyes.

521 notes · View notes

pairofmelaninkweens · 3 years ago

Text

Shrine of Lies

Characters: Preist Tamaki x Y/n

Word count: 6131

By: @sweet-darling91

TW:CW: Marking, biblical references, sacrilege, demons, corruption, marking, biting, mutual masterbation, cunnilingus, blowjob

This Peice is a part of the 𝐀 𝐒𝐚𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐀𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐂𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐛 please check out the other works here, and mind the content warnings!

The work of an exorcist was arduous, traumatizing and even life-threatening. You and your team, a young group of exorcists, continue to train and aid the remote village in Japan from the rising number of possessions and assaults from demons. Tasks range from blessing homes, tending to the ill, cleansing a home from a demon assault and exorcizing the demons from a host body. Even after exorcizing the demon and banishing it, the responsibility of tending to whatever damage the fallout was also fell on you.

At first nothing phased you, you got into this line of work to help and support others as best as you could. Your views on the locals were expressed when you rolled your eyes and accepted their old fashioned and unfounded tips with underhanded comments of your own, it still weighed on you and formed a jaded view on the locals. No matter what you did for them, they would praise your name for 5 minutes, then resume their onslaught of demands and eventually returned to the sins that drove them to darken your doorstep with sullen expressions waiting for you to clean up their mess all over again. Jaded, was one way of expressing your feelings towards their hypocritical and backwards demands. You were here to help, not to be a slave to their crooked crusade. At this rate once you were perfectly happy having your guard up, only being contacted when necessary. All the other exorcists except Tamaki followed suit. The village favorites the young priest for his pious nature, he was always diligent in his tasks relating to the church and listened carefully to whatever they had to tell him through his slight fidgets and the blush that spanned his entire face. What’s more is the way he would carry himself, with dignity that compensated the social awkwardness. His habit of mumbling and soft introverted nature was endearing and explained why he would pair with you. You were a buffer between him and those who blindly idolized him, drawn to his purity. You weren’t into socializing with the locals either, but your straightforwardness aided you in taking the lead, and keeping the dreaded social interactions to a minimum for him. He was more inclined to completing the tasks. Whenever you witnessed him performing them, he was a natural genius in the way he made it look so effortless compared to your peers, and in some instances you would swear you would see a fleeting glimmer of darkness in his eyes with the slightest smirk at the sight of the possessed hosts, or hear a sarcastic chuckle he tried to supress with his mutterings when you were retreating to the confines of your sanctuary. It was clear to you that he was hiding something and on days like today where you paired up to gather supplies in the village gave you optimum time to pick up on some of the habits he would mask with his mumbling and fidgeting, either Tamaki was a pious man, struggling against his own sinful nature, or a wolf in sheep’s clothing, either option was exciting, but you were secretly hoping it was the latter.

Back on the church grounds you were welcomed with a notice that there was an impromptu meeting with Tashiro, and the other members. Exasperation escaped your lips in a sigh and grumbling as you made your way to the meeting, slamming yourself in the furthest chair from the group and closest to the door to hear what Father Fat gum had to say. When the large, muscled man made his way through the entrance and stood at the centre of the room he cleared his throat and scanned the faces gathered, mentally taking attendance.

“Glad that you were all able to make it to this meeting, it is a bit of an urgent matter to remind you of why we are here, what are roles are and what is expected of us during our stay.” He begins, noticing you huff and roll your eyes then settle yourself to sit quietly and give him your attention. It’s not Fat gum that stoked your irritation, it’s what comes next that tests your patience.

“I’m sorry that I don’t have better news to share with you all, but it seems that the villagers have some concerns that worried head office and now we are instructed to fall into some of their rules if we are to stay here.” He casts a side glance at you as his lips thin in concern of your reaction. Wipes his head and proceed in a neutral tone. “We are supposed to be the example of what they are to follow, so there is going to be more scorn and burden on our part in how we carry ourselves. Namely how we carry ourselves when we are not on duty. I’m not going to spare you the unnecessary details and get to the point. We are to no longer pair off in coed partners unless said partners are married. Interactions with others need to be held to a minimum. So, no touching while we are out. Dressing should be modest.” He pauses to clear his throat, must be from spewing the absolute bullshit they are having him repeat. “Even if your bodies are shaped a certain way, clothing is to conceal not reveal. Now finally the last and most important part is, abstinence. We are to remain pure to these folks to be taken seriously, and before you berate me. I have rung off their phone, bargained and argued with every supervisor leading to the head. Unfortunately, these mandates are not going anywhere, and we have to practice them effective immediately.” He finishes with his eyes on the floor and his mouth sunken into a frown.

“That sounds like complete and utter puritan garbage.” you spat your disapproval and looked away in disgust.

“Sorry, it’s what we have to answer to, Y/N. Apparently, this will make us more trustworthy, more reliable in the eyes of the community. Honestly we don’t need to make more waves given the dismal situation they are already in.” Tashiro reassured,

“It’s still garbage, the whole no sex till married, and no sex for priests and exorcists? It’s ridiculous, no” - you smirked cruelly. “a divine comedy, that the same ‘community’ thinks they have a say as to what we do in our personal lives, when it’s their vices that cause us to risk life and limb!” You retort with such passion Tamaki looked straight into your eyes. “Tama,” your sudden attention gave him a start. “Yeah?”

“Aren’t you tired of this strain? These incessant rules? They forever give themselves over to the very said demons that they fear whenever they need something. Just last week we had to fight against one of Beelzebub’s lower grade minions because two merchants surrendered to their own greed-'' At the mention of that incident made Tamaki bow his head and pointedly look at the floor, to others that looked as if you were making him uncomfortable. Had that been the case you would have backed up, but that little shit was suppressing a smirk, you were sure of it because that was the same way he would stifle his laughter whenever you studied scriptures on the blind leading the blind, how man-made rules and ideologies lead the people of the past straight into the hands of the same demons they feared. The irony was all too much for him not to grin at, but his reputation allowed him to get away with these mannerisms. The perfect disguise, you thought much like that of one of the princes of darkness. Tashiro cuts you off with a warning look and an irritated noise from clearing his throat, he must be tired of your outbursts whenever you called shit for what it was, and unlike Tamaki, your reputation was less than pious, but your skills were what saved you from being booted from the clergy. “I did warn you of how primitive this neck of the woods can be in certain customs. Celibacy happens to be one of them. Let’s try not to make any waves, yeah?” he finishes with a hard look of finality and concludes the impromptu meeting, sending everyone to their quarters. You lag to walk with Tamaki. The trip is silent, but you pick up on the way his breathing gets ragged when you catch close in on him, eyeing the rouge color creeping up his neck and the way he bites his lip and hunches his shoulders. As you are round the corner to your rooms you stop him just short of his door in the cranny shielding the two of you from the view of any onlookers, but just barely.

“Tamaki, this sounds like garbage to you too, doesn’t it?” you whispered to him with a sad look in your eyes that he can’t place. “Y/N, I’m sure it’s a hassle that will pass, just remember to be in check of your emotions so as not to make yourself vulnerable when we go out to exorcise demons ok?” he says hoping it brings some sort of ease to you. He’s surprised when you smile at him and wrap your arms around his middle. Closing his eyes he relaxes in the feeling of your warmth, the smell of your shampoo tempts him to lean into the hug and then he feels the softness of your breasts squeeze into him. “You could do that for me, can’t you….Tama~” your breathy whisper floods his face with warmth, and he leans away when you release him, meeting his gaze you clasped one of his hands and squeezed it between your smaller ones. You were pushing him, baiting him out to bend the rules.

“Y/N what are you doing? You can’t be touching me here in the open, the hug was risky.” He stammers, turning his head, fixing his attention to the stained-glass windows.

“Tamaki~” You purr, trailing your finger down his temple, then tracing the sharp line of his jaw, turning his head forcing his gaze to return to meet yours. Tell me, do you honestly think complying to the forced celibacy rule will make us better at our job? Answer me honestly and I’ll let go.”

Tamaki’s body grows rigid, large hands grasping your shoulders and pushing your body against the wall, causing you to pout at him. “That’s not nice.”

“I don’t agree with them, but I’m not getting into trouble either. I have been able to suppress my desires for years, and despite what you think. We can get in trouble just by being this close.” He mutters.

“Then are we gonna sort through these feeling together?” you close the space between you and palm the growing bulge in his pants. “You know I like being around you, I like how gentle you are. I especially like how excited you get to see me.” You hum, but he stands upright. “The rules have just been made y/n. I’m not going to break them on the first night.” He asserts and brushes past you with his hand on the knob of his chamber door, but before he opens it you hear him mutter in a deep, darkening tone that makes your hairs stand on end. “Don’t go knocking on the devil’s door, he might just answer.” You smirk to yourself as he disappears into his room and locks the door. That was his answer, but you could see he didn’t mean it. The rigidness and the fumbling of his hands were tactics in keeping himself busy from grabbing you, that didn’t escape your observations, and you have been watching him for some time, picking up on these behaviours, sparking your curiosity and pushing you to find out where these clues lead to. Repressed urges, or wolf in sheep’s clothing. You were determined to find out, despite his warnings.

Pulling yourself off the wall with a disappointed huff you make your way into your room, slipping out of your robes and walking over to your dresser to get a change of clothes when you heard it. A soft whimper rung in your ears. Tamaki sat on his bed on the opposite side of the wall stroking his aching length, eyes closed and imagining your smaller hands barely able to wrap around his length stroke him from base to tip, playing with his tip. Squeezing his eyes to suppress the frustration that melted away when he heard your voice, through the walls. “Tamaki~ please.” Your sweet moan made him buck into the air unconsciously. His pointed ears twitched listening to you but there was no mistaking the sounds of you fingering yourself. “I can hear you, you don’t have to answer me, but let me do this with you.” You whisper through the wall. There was no time to think of any reason to reject you, you were moaning so sweetly for him. Helping him through his time of need right? Surly this one transgression would be overlooked. Scooting closer to the wall, secretly kicking himself because it could have been your body, he was scooting closer to instead. “Go faster” he ordered, matching his strokes to the squelching sounds of your fingers plunging into your wet swollen pussy. Fuck he wished it was his cock splitting you open, watching your essence coat his cock before it disappeared deep inside you. “I’m close Tamaki” you mewled the pace of your fingers sped up, the sounds were all he could hear, all he focused on when he fucked into his fist, then finally shooting silken ropes of cum up his belly, as he heard you stifle you moan as you reached your climax. He reached over to grab a cloth to clean himself, smiling over at the wall. Not daring to say anything to urge you to do anything impulsive and get you into more trouble. Then drifted off to sleep, his head pressed against the wall, with you mirroring his actions on the other side.

Then next morning you were sitting in the pews watching Tamaki bless the crosses and refill the holy water bottles for the other priest on duty performing exorcisms in the village. When his hands were busy, it was easy for his mind to focus on the task at hand. The look of total concentration and his steady hands stirred something wicked in you, wanting to push his buttons and shake his resolve. This, moments when he was busy fulfilling his duties rendered his morale struggle and indiscretions invisible in the eyes of the others but you weren’t the others you thought to yourself abandoning the Pew, you join him on the opposite side of the altar tracing your fingers over the cherry oak. “Anything I can do to help… Brother Tamaki” you whisper leaning forward just enough for him to be able to spy your cleavage. Smirking when you see the colour rise from his neck to his hairline, dropping the bottles and stumbling back stuttering. “Ttt-too close y/n”. Pouting with a finger to your chin you slip around the altar to his side. “ooo Tama-kii~”, are you ill? Your rather flushed” you coo, feeling his forehead, making sure to press your chest into his. A smile tugs at the corner of your lips when you feel him instinctively move to grab you, but instead stiffens his entire body, planting himself in place. “You know you can grab me, cus...I’m not going to break.” whispering the latter half you pull back with a wink “unless you want to break me. That would be fun too.” you smile, unable to hide your mirth, but he shushes you with his finger against your lips. “can’t do this y/n” he mutters and slams your hands down to your sides before retreating to his quarters. Well, there is something to be said about that stubborn resolve he has, once he made up his mind on something he sure gave his all in standing by it. Too bad you were hell-bent on making sure that “belief” he had unraveled, it was satisfying to see that look of impending defeat cross his face. You finished his task for him and headed over to your quarters, which are conveniently neighbouring Tamaki’s. With your bed to the wall, you could hear him trying to suppress the low moans and whimpers, as he no doubt was stroking his cock falling apart as he fucked his fist. What was he thinking about? Well, you certainly accompanied him in reaching down your garments and rubbing slow tight circles into your clit, imagining how full his thick fingers would make your cunt feel, how he could mute your voice with two of his digits in your mouth. Hoping that he would give in and come through your door to sink his cock into you and fuck you into the mattress. What you didn’t see was the changes to his appearance he was stifling, as his restraint began to unravel, the fluctuations in his voice and the protesting groans in response to the change of his mass.

Weeks had passed since you last gotten to work with Tamaki, the confines of the Chapel began to get on your nerves, the frustration of not having your whispered moments in the night, glancing his expressions when you brushed close to him, offered yourself to him only to see the struggle with his own ideals and the orders that were forced on you. The villagers seemed to be well pleased though the visitors never ceased to utter their pleased opinions of how much better you were carrying yourself. You had to bite your tongue when they asked you. “Don’t you feel much better now that you look the part?” they wouldn’t know what looking the part was if it was right before their eyes. From all the secret looks you would cast Tamaki in the brief moments in passing you knew that he wanted more than this. He was full of potential, overlooked for his quiet agreeable nature, but if you took the time, like you have been with the secret nightly routine guiding each other to release, you could see that there was a powerful darkness, a dominance in him that you wanted to feel. Smiling to yourself you placed in your request for practicing the ritual for confessions after an exorcism. Knowing Tamaki would be the one to answer that request given that he was the most skilled at the task, the one that was always requested by popular demand. It was almost eerie the way that he was revered, naturally drawing the villagers to his side, like moths to a flame. Always in awe as he banished some of the top tier minions haunting homes, reining havoc from a deal gone awry, and it was the last Exorcism that confirmed your belief and answered your hunch. A villager’s daughter who was possessed by a lesser demon had made eye contact with him and addressed him with reverence before being slain. You could not ignore the unmistakable look of disdain in his expression, the way his body stood with the confidence of a certified leader. Then of course the muttering of in the distorted tone, “should have executed you long ago.” Approaching his side, you asked. “Did you know that demon?” The question made his eyes hone in on you as if gauging you to decide on the best answer, then dismissing it with an awkward wave of his hand with the attempt of masking the event with his false timid nature, and sheepish voice. That was enough, you just needed him alone, and to stay in the room long enough to get what you wanted. Based on what you witnessed lined with what you studied in The Grimoire of Pope Honorius, the appearance, skills and abilities aligned with Tamaki’s quirk and the way the population of the area perceived him. One of the ancient demon kings was known for his ability to shift from man to creature and even a mixture of the two. As well as the hoarse voice, the demanding presence of a leader since he easily led sixty legions of lesser demons complete with skills to use invisibility, and popularity. The latter lining perfectly with how he was able to hide in plain sight yet being revered by the masses. Indeed this “lesson” would be one to remember.

When the time came you dressed the part perfectly, not a hair out of place, robes freshly starched and ironed. However, it was the same robes that the village requested you not to wear because of how poorly it concealed your curves. If anything, the garment that would have offered a baggy fit on others, proved to be snug on your frame. You even pushed the envelope in neglecting your tights to cover your bare legs. You were not in need of concealing anything you thought with excitement. Barely containing yourself when you heard the doors swing open.

What is it that you need my help with y/n?”

“Oh, you know, just running through the steps of confession, nothing major.”

His pulse rises, his gut tightens with anticipation; he knows that you were exceptional in what you were doing, but his curiosity and the allure of seeing what you had up your sleeve excited him. He was so good for so long, depriving these forbidden pleasures for years. Years that stretched longer than your lifespan. Surely if he slipped just this once, it could be overlooked; if he could just see what it was you were up to, he could sate his curiosity and retreat to his quarters before anything serious transpired. Closing his eyes and refocusing his attention on you, he asked, “ ok, let’s practice receiving the forgiveness of sins to confess. Y/n I need you to get down on your knees and recite the initial line.” Your lips tugged at the corners into a small smile. “I’m a wretched sinner that needs your sanctification,” you purr, sinking to your knees, palms pressed together, doe eyes looking up at him through lashes barely masking the glimmer of mischief as you open your mouth and stretch out your tongue with a lewd moan, parting your thighs.” Tamaki’s eyes widen in shock at your downright lewd actions in the middle of the pulpit, no less. He could feel lust heat his blood, coursing through his body, tightening the coil in his core, and his mouth salivate. Fuck, that moan sounded so good, so sweet; as bratty as you were, he was sure you could be good, you could behave. He could make you behave with his steady hand. He knew it, was sure of it he thought as he forced his body still to allow him to take the bread and place it on your waiting tongue. He watches you capture his thumb between your lips, pulling a small gasp from his throat witnessing you pulling his thumb in your mouth. Swirling your warm tongue around it, savouring the salt on his fingertips, and humming in pleasure all while holding his gaze. Tamaki’s mouth drops open, watching you, feeling his cock twitch to life, and before he was conscious of what he was doing, he hooks the thumb in your mouth pulling you close to his growing bulge. Not ready for him to take the opportunity to come to his senses, you reach for his hips, smoothing your hand down his thigh, pressing your nails down as you go, dragging them back up and finally palming his growing erection.

Tamaki yanks at your jaw so harshly it makes you squeeze your eyes shut, then look up at him. “ You, filthy temptress.” his voice held a deep dark timber that amplified in his chest, his eyes starting to glow with a light of danger as his pupils began to dilate. Once again, he surprises you with that resolve of his when he shakes his head, pulling away from you and raking his fingers through his indigo strands, exhaling as if that would force the temptations out of his mind, wipe the lewd actions and sounds you made from his mind. You couldn’t let that be the case, where was the fun in that? You stood up and made your way to the altar, taking a seat and whistling over to him, getting his attention. “I’m sorry, Tama, but tell me. Do you honestly think that depriving your needs to the point that your mind spirals into insanity will save you? Who do you think your prayers go? And what deity do you think these pitiful actions will appease?” you mock.

Tamaki’s ears grew hot, and his eyes narrowed. “You think my actions are pointless?”

You pretend to mull over his question. “I never said that. I just think you forgot who you are and are trying to awaken your full potential. You need to stop suppressing it, Tamaki~” you purr his name the same way you do when you touch yourself in the shroud of darkness, to the sounds of him fucking into his fist and spilling his cum all over himself. Tutting at the memory, you lick your lips and hope that this time, it would be your throat he cums into instead of his fist. “Everything I do has a purpose.” irritation heats his word, his canines elongate as he sneers at you, approaching with an unhurried pace. “What potential do you think you can unlock in me and how?” he asks. Finally, he is asking the right question. Spreading your legs and hiking up your robes, you begin to ask, “well, you can manifest what you eat; what if I tell you, I have something that will manifest your truth if you have a taste?” He stops and stares; the look of conflicting thoughts span across his face, but you call out to him. “You know I have never hurt you; why would I start now?” You pull your panties to the side and run your finger up your slit, spreading your lips and curling the finger of your free hand over to him. As if caught in a trance, he closes the distance between you and kneels between your thighs, finally close enough to appreciate the sweet soft scent of your skin and the slick glistening on your lips. Before he could stop himself, he licks a hot stripe up your quivering cunt, moaning in response to the sinful sound coming out of you. The taste of you dances on his tongue, the sweetest and most sinful flavour he has ever had, clouding his logic and corrupting everything he has ever known, tarnishing every practice and need to stop like aged silver. His muscles contracted, and his nails grew into talons that bite into the plush of your thighs, sending sharp pricks of paint ebbing into pleasure as he prods his tongue into you, groaning when your walls flutter around his tongue and squeeze down onto him. He begins to lose himself in you, worshiping you with a hungry mouth, searching tongue, and holding onto you like your cunt is the only salvation left in this life. The feeling of him contorting his tongue in you was overwhelming you, you have had men tongue fuck you before, just not the way Tamaki was actually prodding deep, swirling his tongue against the convulsing walls of your pussy. Your moans rose in volume, pitch and with a tone of neediness. His tongue felt like it was actually stretching you, as he rocked his face back and forth. Nodding when you bucked your hips into his mouth. His eyes rolled back feeling any sense of restraint evaporate, being replaced with the need to claim you, mark you, and consume you. He wanted to ruin you, and why shouldn’t he? If no good deed goes unpunished. Then he’s ready to deal with whatever the wages are for this transgression. His tongue elongates inside of you, the friction it causes has you whimpering from the ways it made you writhe in pleasure, as you submerge into the warm pulsing bliss of your orgasm. Tamaki’s assault on your fluttering walls does not stop, he continues contorting his tongue in you despite your efforts in closing your legs from the feeling of overstimulation, but the force he uses made his talons bite into your thighs pricking you with sharp stings of pain. Pulling back his head and pulling his tongue out of your dripping lips, he laps at the swollen flesh, looking at you with blown pupils almost making his eyes look completely as dark as the night sky outside.

Licking his lips clean of you, he leans in close to breathe against your clit. “ Well done, y/n. I think I know what it is you want me to realize, but before we get to that task, and before you get to cum again, why not reward me? nothing is free, so why don’t you go ahead and take a taste for yourself?” He releases his hold on your thighs letting them droop to the altar like the tendrils of a jellyfish. Watching Tamaki rise to his feet made your mouth fall open to see his new height, and the ways his toned body had filled out his robes, threatening to tear at the seams when he moved his arms. You were surprised the effects of his quirk were working so quickly but the time for realizations was cut short when he let his pants and boxers pool around his ankles revealing his veiny erection. He wrapped his hand around his length and fisted himself giving himself a few pumps to alleviate the throbbing need building up. Your mouth watered seeing the way pre began to seep from his swollen tip. Sliding off the altar you make your way before Tamaki, who now caresses your face letting you relax into his large palm so he can sharply grab your cheeks and pull your face close to his. “I’m your God now.” Though he never asked for it, you nodded your understanding. Both your heart and your pussy fluttered with the excitement of his transformation. “Now it’s time for you to worship me as such'' he breathes. Voice so low it resonated in your core, flashing goosebumps across your flesh. “Tch, if you want me to bless you, you have to serve me, nothing is free '' The command shoots down your spine and pools into a tightening cord in your core. When he snaked his hands through your hair, gripping your strands close to your scalp and bringing you to your knees observing intently as you wrap your lips around his cock, slipping your eyes shut and wrapping your hand pumping the length that didn't fit down your throat. Tamaki flexed his thighs and groaned in pleasure, slowly pushing his hips forward as you pump him, swirling your tongue along the underside of his cock twitching in your mouth and moaning around it, letting the vibrations of your moan pleasure him further. Taking advantage of your relaxed muscles he thrusted into you brushing your hands away, content with your actions making you look like you were uttering a lewd prayer on your knees, eyes closed, and hands clasped around the base of him. Fuck you were so eager to please why did he deprive himself this pleasure for so long? Your moans began to sound more desperate, as his pace increased fucking your throat raw. Barely giving you time to catch a breath before his thick hot seed pooled on your tongue. His large hand slipped down from your hair and wrapped around your throat lightly squeezing the side gathering your attention to slide open your eyes. "Don't swallow, show me" he ordered as he slipped his slickened cock out of your mouth, biting at his bottom lip at the sight of your fucked out expression. The sound of tearing fabric filled the otherwise silent room and made you widen your eyes to see what was happening. Tamaki had manifested wings, shredding his robes and you realized he also had claws growing from his hands. You should be panicking, yet the euphoric feeling of excitement floods your bloodstream with dopamine, dilating your pupils, reducing your irises to thin strips of e/c. Lapping up the cum and looking up at his Ruby irises you curl your lips into a smile. "I knew you were something more, a wolf hiding in sheep's clothing. Baal." You mused.

"And you have done well seeing who I am, obediently recognising me, constantly offered yourself to me despite the persecution you received." He says stroking your hair then grabbing the nape of your neck pulling you up to your feet, then scooping you up into his hold. "Your body is a beautiful offering I accept with contentment." He whispers against your jaw, freeing you of your remaining clothing, effectively removing anything that would prevent him from making direct contact with your heated skin. Carting you over to the altar and spreading your thighs so he could slot himself between them. You stare up at him in a heated gaze, pulse thrumming in your ears, goosebumps line your skin, and your waiting cunt are already slick and quivering. Ready for him to fuck you into the afterlife, and he does. He lines his head with your swollen lips, slipping his hardening cock through your silken folds, relishing the sound of your mewls and stifled moans. It’s cute to see you tremble beneath him, bucking your hips with impatience. He laughs at your futile attempts and slaps his length against your sensitive swollen clit, pulling a small squeal of surprise from you. Seeing how frustration creased your eyebrows, pouted your lips and welled tears threatening to breach your waterline and streak down your face. When you feel his head breach your entrance and you clench down on him, feeling how deliciously he stretches you as he sinks deeper into your warmth that welcomes the intrusion by clenching down on him. The feeling is mutually divine: the burn from the stretch as he bottoms out inside you melds into pleasure almost instantly when he starts to pull out and plummets back into you with so much force you gasp out breaths each time he repeats the movement. Your clit tickling against the dusting of groomed pubes sent pleasure signals shooting through your nerves. Your back arched as Baal dug his talons into your sides creating shallow scratches and lapping at the blood that sprang up. You felt light headed at the mixture of pain from how he was slamming his hips into yours, scratching and marking your body, then feeling pleasure when he licked and soothed the wounds, when he brought his lips to your ear and praised you for taking his entire length how beautiful you are and how sweet your voice is pleading for him not to stop as your are swept away in the shocking current of your orgasm. Placing your palms up and nibbling at his bottom lip to deepen the kiss he presses against your lips he chuckles and grabbed onto the altar’s edge and delivers sloppy punishing blows of his hips into yours making your see glowing stars dancing in your field of vision and hearing a splintering noise muted in your ears and then feeling like you were falling, only to be caught by a pair of large warm hands that offered stability, a safe space to fall apart in, and so you did. Cumming hard, covered in sweat and exhausted from taking the fucking of a lifetime from the Demon king brought you back to your senses to realize you were spit on Tamaki’s dick, while he held you up with no effort, making you feel tiny compared to his now towering form with extended wings, fangs extending from his lips, claws that threatened to pierce your flesh with one wrong move. His legs were thickly muscled and feet hooved in his signature appearance. Despite the changed exterior you could still make out Tamaki’s personality mingled with the dark deity as he brought his lips to your temple, nuzzling you and smiling when he felt your weak hands caress his cheeks. The intimate moment was interrupted with the door creaking open, revealing the arrival of a shell-shocked Fat Gum, other lower ranking priests and exorcist staring at the sight of your joined bodies in the center of the pulpit and the destroyed alter that Tamaki fucked you on now laying in splinters scattered around your feet. Well, now that they see, maybe now they will believe, not everything was what it seemed.

#bnha tamaki #tamaki x you #tamaki smutt #heavenly bodies collab

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youcouldmakealife · 4 years ago

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SOTW: Bryce/Jared, various; omission

For the prompt: What does that article about Jared and Bryce actually say?

When pictures of Bryce Marcus and Erin Matheson surfaced on social media, people were assuming the worst. Bryce Marcus, 25, of the Calgary Flames, is wearing a wedding ring. Erin Matheson, 18, the younger sister of Jared Matheson of the Vancouver Canucks, is not.

The pictures weren’t what they looked like.

“It was crazy getting a call from my mom like ‘twitter’s all saying Bryce is cheating on his wife with you’,” Erin Matheson says, with a slightly incredulous laugh. “I was sleeping and I got that call and I was like ‘wait what?’.”

“Bryce is basically my big brother,” Erin says. “And no offence to Jared, but he’s totally my favourite big brother. I graduated high school and Bryce wanted to do something special to celebrate that so we did a little staycation thing. I think it’s kind of weird that everyone just assumed things. He’s family to us.”

Bryce Marcus and Jared Matheson met at a summer development camp for elite Western Canadian prospects in 2015. Marcus was an associate coach, Jared a camper. By the end of the month, they were inseparable.

“They said he was a coach but he mostly just stood around,” Jared says. “Totally slacking as a coach.”

“Jared didn’t listen to anything I told him,” Bryce counters. “He was totally uncoachable. He listens to my advice now though.”

“He has pretty good advice,” Jared admits. “I definitely listen now. He knows the game inside and out.”

“They instantly clicked,” says Rafael Sanchez of the Washington Capitals, who was also a prospect at that camp, and trains with Matheson in Calgary during the offseason. “They’re really different personalities but they complement one another.”

Chaz Rossi, former linemate of Matheson’s on the Calgary Hitmen and current teammate of Marcus’ on the Calgary Flames, also trains with Sanchez and Matheson during the offseason. He disagrees with Sanchez about how different Matheson and Marcus are.

“They’re actually really similar in a lot of ways. They’re really quiet until you get to know them, pretty introverted people, and they’re two of the best hockey IQs I’ve ever met. Really smart guys. I’m not surprised that things clicked when they met one another. People really underestimate Bryce in a lot of ways, which is frustrating to watch. I can’t imagine how frustrating it must be to deal with every day.”

Rossi is also frustrated with press coverage of Marcus, and unsurprised people assumed Marcus was dating Erin Matheson, who he describes as a ‘cool kid’. “My girlfriend Ashley and I hang out with Bryce a lot,” Rossi says. “We’re tight. So of course everyone was saying that she was Bryce’s secret wife or something. I think it’s really messed up that people think because Bryce plays hockey for a living that he doesn’t get to have privacy. Ash and Bryce were able to brush it off, but it’s messed up.”

<image, selfie of Ashley and Bryce, taken by Ashley Guerin>

<image, Bryce, Jared, Chaz, Raf, and Grace at a restaurant table, taken by Ashley Guerin>

<image, Bryce and Jared and Chaz playing video games, taken by Ashley Guerin>

“We’re all really close during the offseason,” Rossi says. “Bryce doesn’t train with us but he hangs out with our training group and all that. That’s basically our Calgary crew. Whatever happens during the season, we all end up back in the same place, and during the season we’ve got a group chat and everything. And Don and Susan <Matheson> are really welcoming to us too. Basically a Calgary family or something.”

Don Matheson agrees with Rossi that they’re a family.

“Bryce is pretty much a second son to me and Susan,” Don Matheson says. “So at least I have one Flame in the family.”

Jared Matheson groans when he’s told what his father said. “My dad’s been a Flames fan his whole life. It was a little tough when I got drafted by the Oilers. He has Bryce to cheer for, at least. He says he cheers for me when the Canucks play the Flames but I’m not so sure. Depends on the standings, probably.”

The Mathesons, who live in Calgary, almost instantly adopted Bryce into the family, and soon that included his mother, Elaine Marcus. The Mathesons attended Bryce’s wedding, and the two families even share Christmas together.

<image, Elaine and Erin wearing formal attire at an outdoor event>

<image, Bryce and Erin with presents in their laps>

<image, Elaine and Susan with wine glasses, mid-conversation>

“It’s really a comfort knowing Bryce has had a family in Calgary,” Elaine Marcus says. “I feel better knowing that. Bryce lost his dad when he was young, and I think it’s important that he has Don in his life.”

And the hospitality goes both ways — when Jared was traded to the Vancouver Canucks, Elaine was happy to offer him a place to stay.

“Elaine’s amazing,” Jared Matheson says. “One of the nicest people you’ll ever meet. She would even drive me into practice some days, it was like having a mom in Vancouver. It was a big comfort when I was adjusting.”

“He was the perfect house guest,” Elaine says. “He cooks and cleans, unlike someone I won’t name. He was a pleasure to have.”

“It was a relief knowing that Jared was staying with Elaine,” Don Matheson says. “Jared’s really self-sufficient but he’s still young, and you never stop worrying about your kids. But knowing he was with Elaine, I wasn’t worried.”

We caught up with Matheson and Marcus when the Flames came to Vancouver. They’ve just finished lunch with Bryce’s mother, and managed to find the time to squeeze in a quick interview before they separated for their respective pregames.

“He’s my best friend,” Marcus says, with the earnest seriousness his friends and family all remarked upon. “Some people you just know are supposed to be in your life.”

“I don’t know about best,” Matheson says with a straight face, indulging one of the favourite pastimes of siblings and hockey players alike. “I have a lot of friends.”

“Jared,” Marcus says, in the complaining voice of all siblings facing a chirp.

Matheson grins now that he’s scored his hit.

“He’s my best friend too,” Matheson says.

How is it, being so close to a player on a rival team?

“We put it aside,” Matheson says. “Obviously when it’s game time we both do our best to win, but whatever happens — it’s hockey. You don’t let it define you at the end of the day. Some things are more important.”

“Totally agree,” Marcus says.

Would it be the same if they were to face off in the playoffs this year?

“Absolutely,” Marcus says.

Matheson laughs and disagrees. “All bets are off.”

-Danielle Weber, NHL.com

#SOTW #jared matheson #bryce marcus #elaine marcus #chaz rossi #don matheson #erin matheson #raf sanchez #ashley guerin

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santmat · 2 years ago

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Hathras Tulsi Sahibi Satsang Discourses: Sant Mat Spirituality

Complete Mahatmas, Genuine Saints came to the world in their respective times and kept on emancipating the living beings who were connected with them. On completion of their time, they left the body as per the will of the Lord and went to the Lord and left their work [their spiritual mission] to the other saints when departing.

** Actually God appears through the medium of the Master, the Guru, so we have to search for a living Master.**

"Complete and imperishable (permanent) benefit is available only through the living Guru. In him is the magnetic power of the Great Consciousness or the dynamic Consciousness, the touch of which creates power in us and connects our soul to the Current of the Word (ātmā ko Shabda) that rises to the spiritual plane." She (the Sound Current) helps us by being with our organs. [The Shabd/Sound Current is the vital life force of the body.] Very fortunate is that soul who takes shelter of such a supreme saint (param santa kī sharaṇ)."

INITIATION Into Surat Shabd Yoga: ** The Jivatma (soul) being given Shabda is the first step of Guru devotion (guru bhakti). **

"Mercy of Satguru Sahib

"Only with the grace of the master, the knowledge of the path of Naam is obtained. The Complete Satguru, the true Saint, is the real form of Naam or Word. That's why the Sound is revealed within them. Only by breaking the bonds of mind, illusion and time is one free from the cycle of transmigration. The Naam is only something the soul experiences, which is possible only through the Master (the guidance, teachings and mentoring of the living master).

"Sahib ji teaches the meditation of Surat-Shabd or Sound yoga.

1) Surat is called soul, the attention faculty of the soul.

2) The Sound creates and permeates the whole universe.

3) The Surat, the soul, carefully focuses upon that musical Naam (the Word), listening and merging into the Sound.

4) By holding the stream of that Sound, the surat-soul returns to it's core, it's essence.

5) This practice can be learnt through training by a complete saint, a Satguru. Only a present teacher, a living teacher, can teach this sadhana, this spiritual practice.

6) This practice is simple so it is also called Sahaja Yoga, easy or natural yoga, the yoga of Sound.

7) There is no boundary or barrier of country, caste, sect, etc..., for this practice. All are welcome.

There is no need to sacrifice the world or give up your worldly duties for successful meditation.

This path is the way to die while living, the body of the seeker starts to numb. Due to full concentration in Simran, the soul is concentrated in the third eye behind the eyes and one merges into the Sound. That's why the soul tastes the nectar, the bliss, and shines in the light of the Sound. In this situation, the the seeker becomes unaware of the outside world. This is the situation of dying while alive [death before dying]. Sahib ji says:

"The stream of Sound is the Word of the Lord in the whole universe or cosmos. This Word is the consciousness stream that reaches everything in the cosmos from the creator (the Supreme Being). This is the stream he created to connect the whole, the All. This is what he is nurturing in all. The Word or Sound is our foundation. By holding the notes of the same tune, the Divine Sound, you can get back to your core, your essence, and merge into It."

In our scriptures, there are many types of yogas like Hatha yoga, Mantra Yoga, Laya yoga, Raja yoga, etc…, but all of these remain confined to the limits of body and mind, have not been said to free the soul from the trap of mind and illusion.

The true master practices the spiritual Sound and Light that comes from beyond. By these methods of meditation, the soul becomes introverted through regular practice and hears the Melodious Sound within, and the soul reaches where the Sound is emanating from. This is the goal of the practice of Surat-Shabd-Yoga.

Satnam

Jai Sat Naam

Satnam-Satguru

Mercy of Satguru Sahib Ji

Satnam - Satguru

-- Satsang Discourses from the Hathras Satsang Associated With Sant Tulsi Sahib

Sant Mat Radhasoami Books, The E Library: Tulsi Sahibi and Maharshi Mehi Section -

Recent Publications Related to Maharshi Mehi, Sant Tulsi Sahib of Hathras and Their Successors:

https://SantMatRadhasoami.blogspot.com/2019/01/sant-mat-e-library-maharshi-mehi-sant.html

#satsang #hathras #india #tulsi sahib #wali #mandir #ashram #santmat #sant mat #radhasoami #spirituality #meditation

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readersperspective · 5 years ago

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Writing Advice Bilingual Characters

As some of you (who read my reviews) already might have noticed, I am bilingual myself. Sadly, multilingual people do not get represented well a lot in media, so yeah... some advice for writing them. It will certainly not capture every aspect of being bilingual, but it might give you a first idea.

There are different ways to be multilingual.

People who grew up with more than one native language will almost certainly speak all of them fluently. Most of them have two (their parents’ language and their country’s language, or the language of one parent and of the other) but I also know a family where the children grew up with four native languages (the mother speaks Portuguese, the father Italian, they talk to each other in English, and live in Germany, where the children grew up)

Some people speak two or more languages, but cannot write all of them - especially when the alphabets are not the same, for example English and Russian or Arabic. This affects mostly children of immigrants.

Some people can read and write a language quite well, but are not good at speaking or listening comprehension. Those people often learned the language at school with a bad teacher or by themselves with books and apps.

Some people, again mostly children and grandchildren of immigrants, can read and understand a language, but don’t speak it. Mostly, the parents decided to not teach the child the language, and they learned it themselves by listening to their parents talk to relatives.

Confidence can play a big role in this. I understand the dialect of my grandparents without a problem, but I would never try to speak it. I can’t even imagine forming those words with my mouth, and it would sound terrible.

People who learnt a language at school can reach completely different levels of that language. I started learning English at age 6 and am completely fluent by now. Other people in my class barely understand more than easy conversations in English.

Most people will do their very best to hide their accents.

If the person is not a native speaker, but fluent in a language, their accent will be a mix of whatever they can find at the moment. Media is a big influence in that.

Since I watch more British than American TV, my accent sounds a bit british, too. When I watched “Call the Midwife”, I often even unconciously copy the accent of Laura Main. I don’t know why her, but my brain just liked it, I guess.

Also, we will use words, phrases and sentence structures from so many different sources.

People who learnt English through the internet (aka most of the younger generation) will have problems to not use swear words when actually being in Great Britain or America. They just do not have the weight for us, since on the internet they get used all the time.

I have never in my whole live heard a multilingual person switch languages mid-sentence on accident.

We will do it on purpose, though, if the other part of the conversation understands both languages.

Also, we will maybe say the word in another language if we forget the meaning.

Multilingual people that are not natives in the language they usually use in their day-to-day life (immigrants, for example) will often count and calculate in their native language. For example at a restaurant where they calculate the price in their head, they will probably do it in their native language.

Conversations with multiple multilingual people can be very different.

If one person only understands one language, they will probably try to include that person by speaking the language they share. I can say from experience, though, that if eight native Germans that have varying levels of English language skills will sit together with one introverted Turkish person with medium English language skills, they will go back to German quite often. It’s not nice, but sadly natural.

In general, people will try to speak in their native language if possible. You can take two people that share a native language and also both speak English and let them walk around in London - they will probably speak their native language, no matter how well they speak English.

Multilingual people that share multiple languages will switch on purpose when they feel like they can express their thoughts better in the other language.

Many languages have taken words from English.

Especially young people take a lot of English filler words and phrases (or insults) and put them into their native language. “Help, mein Deutschlehrer überfordert uns mit Hausaufgaben, like, what the fuck, glaubt der wir haben nichts besseres zu tun?” Is a sentence you would absolutely hear from a German student.

Many young people that don’t live in Great Britain or America will not use these words and phrases around their parents. First of all, our parents often do not speak English as well as we do, but more importantly, our parents do not like us using English instead of ur native language.

Many professions nowadays have an English name, I don’t know why. What used to be a Hausmeister is now a Facility Manager. The longer the English phrase for your profession, the more likely you will not be taken serious by older people.

Once you have more than one native language, you learn new languages more easily, for some reason. I know a girl that speaks 7 languages, at age 20, 5 of them fluently.

"You speak English quite well” or phrases like that said by a native speaker can be the best compliment ever, or more uncomfortable than nice.

When you are translating for your family and hear that sentence, it is super nice.

When you are only speaking English, that sentence indicates that your accent is still heavy. You do not pass as a native speaker.

When you are a native speaker, that sentence is just weird.

You can indentify the people that learnt a language through reading by giving them words that are pronounced untypically.

For years I thought “precious” (a word that is heavily used on the internet, especially in fan communities, but not that much in school) was pronounces pree-ci-ous. I was shocked when I heard it for the first time.

There are situations where even quite fluent non-native speakers will not be able to understand or talk in their second language.

The first few minutes after standing up (although that can change when the person is really fluent)

When they are in great pain

When they are in great fear

When they are under great stress

Sometimes even when they did not use that language in the last few days

Translating in realtime is terribly hard and will fuck your head. When I was on holiday with my parents, I often had to read the information signs in museums or at sights for them and translate. It’s easier when you first read the text and then summarise it in another language, but trying to translate it sentence by sentence is painful and you will question your abilities in both languages.

This gets just more horrible when under pressure. While we were in England, a visibly stressed young woman came to us and asked us if we had 5 pounds, she had lost some money she needed to take the train back home. I repeated her sentence to my father. In English.

Also sorry to the poor worker at McDonalds who I talked English to while speaking German to my English exchange student.

People abroad will absolutely become friends with every person that they hear speaking their language. While being in London, we overheard a man talking to his son in German about taking a photo, and I immediately asked (in German) if I should take a photo of both of them together. We talked for fifteen minutes after that, even though we had never met before.

On that note, in tourist citys the people that try to sell things to tourists usually speak a lot of languages enough to say things like “Oh, I speak a bit of [language], too, but not well. Didn’t pay enough attention in school. You look like nice people.” Makes it so easy to sell things.

Idioms are literally hell. Best example has been in the news currently, with Greta Thunberg literally translating a Swedish idiom in a tweet not realising that “putting someone against a wall” means something totally different in English.

Idioms will be hell for you as a writer, too, though, as long as you do not fluently speak both of the languages or at least one of them is fictional, because it’s quite easy to mess up if you use idioms that jus aren’t normally used by people speaking that language.

Bilingual puns are amazing, but sadly rare.

Those are the things I thought of first... Maybe you can find some ideas or inspiration there for your characters, too. The best thing of course is to let someone proof-read your character if you are uncertain, but this hopefully already helped you a bit!

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lgcmanager · 2 years ago

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PUNISHMENTS (3/4)

TO: ALL DEBUTED ARTISTS

On SATURDAY, MAY 7, all the currently debuted artists of Legacy (with the exception of senior idols) are called to the cafeteria a little before noon. It is incredibly rare that everyone is gathered at the same place and time and everyone wonders what could possibly be the reason. They see familiar faces: KIM HYUNCHEOL, HEO AECHA, PARK JEONGAN, and their MANAGERS, who all sport a neutral expression. The most unusual presence, however, is that of the CEO of the company himself, PARK JEONGAN. Surely a sign that a big announcement is about to be made.

“Though you must all be well acquainted with our CEO-nim, I wish to thank him for taking time out of his busy schedule to come here today. Before any of you start hoping for some exciting news, we’re here for something a lot more disappointing today. Yet again. I expected better of you. We’ve had this talk before, haven’t we? I guess some things have a hard time getting into those thick skulls some of you have. Let’s get straight to the point, as everyone’s time is precious.” Hyuncheol’s voice is grave. After a quick glance at his watch, he turns to the CEO. The latter is looking at the artists, neither happy nor upset. Unlike Kim Hyuncheol’s sometimes explosive personality, he is the type to remain calm under any circumstance. He never shouts, but never expresses true kindness either. “As you all know, I’m not the type of CEO who likes being in the front and giving speeches. I do most of my business behind closed doors. As is the trend nowadays, my MBTI would put me in the introverted category.” a dry chuckle escapes his mouth. You can tell he’s not the type to joke often and when he does, it’s not really funny. “I still thought it was essential to be the one to address you today. You are, in my eyes and those of the public, the new shining stars of this company. The generation that will define the future of Legacy Entertainment. You’ve probably all heard before that with great privilege comes great responsibility. We are all aware that a lot of pressure, hardwork and dedication rests upon your shoulders. We demand a lot of you. We make you train countless hours, we ask that you sacrifice a lot of your personal lives. None of this is easy. But I have come to notice a great sense of selfishness from some of you. YOU, kids, are the ones in the spotlight. You put in half the work, while the staff behind the scenes puts the other one. Yet you reap most of the benefits. It’s your name on everybody’s lips. You have dedicated fandoms buying merchandise with your face on it. Never forget that there’s a whole team whose livelihood depends on you. This, my friends, is the true cost of fame. If you’re unwilling or unable to make this sacrifice in exchange for the immense wealth and privilege this company can bring you, your career will not last in this industry.”

He takes a pause, giving the artists some time to digest all of this information. “When you step foot in this building, or any other building in which you represent this company, you need to act professionally and respectfully. You do not get to fool around with your secret lovers where you could easily be caught, you do not get to act in any way that would bring shame to you, to someone else or to the good reputation of Legacy. Relationships have never been strictly forbidden. If you do not wish to disclose them, you better make absolutely sure that you are never caught, whether by us or any member of the public. And it will never be achieved by having displays of affection in a professional setting. We are here to work and we expect you to keep your private life out of it. And now,” he says, bowing to the crowd before taking a step back, “I will let our Kim Hyuncheol take it from here and give you more practical information. I wish you all a good day.”

After the CEO makes his exit, the mood switches. Hyuncheol looks impatient. “If this doesn’t serve as a wake up call for some of you, I really don’t know what will. You need to realize that being in your position is a privilege that very few get to have. We audition thousands of hopefuls every single year. They want so badly to be in your place. We gave you the chance to share your talent with the world and we expect you to do something with it. It doesn’t mean to throw away your private life, but I am BEGGING you to make better choices. Don’t be idiots. And remember that your actions affect not only yourself but your coworkers as well. When you mess up, everyone is impacted. With that being said, for the time being we will be keeping a closer eye on all of you, monitor your actions more closely until we consider you’ve earned our trust. Are we clear?” His glare lands on someone in particular. “Now go back to your regular schedule. LEE YUAN ( @lgcyuan ), pack your things and follow me.”

#lgc:punishment #lgcyuan

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sepublic · 4 years ago

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Happy Birthday to The Owl House!

Honestly, I’m… REALLY shocked to think back on how it’s been a year? It’s been a full, actual year, since that first episode?

I remember when The Owl House was first announced around early 2018. Something about it, the premise, the characters from that one poster we got; It really drew me in, and I kept track of the show’s progress in eager anticipation. Whenever Dana released art of Luz, Eda, and King, I was ecstatic- And when the show was delayed to 2020, I was dismayed.

Then we got our teaser trailer; The opening them, the end credits, even a little sneak peek! I remember speculating a lot about Luz and all of the other new characters we were introduced to, such as Willow, Amity, and Gus- And then we got more and more trailers in the days leading up to the show. I wondered about Luz’s home back on Earth and where her family was, I listened intently to the Hooty and the Parliament music video, finding an almost melancholic, weirdly nostalgic (despite having never watched the show yet) vibe to it- Whilst also avoiding looking at the screen and seeing all of the various clips it offered, because I wanted to be surprised! It was two years of anticipation, two years of wait for this show- I’d never looked forward to a series before like this, last I can recall… So having this content FINALLY come out, seeing these characters in animation, hearing their wonderful voices! My soul was vibing, it was time, it was coming after all this time…!

Eventually I finished Infinity Train Book 2, the same day that The Owl House premiered… I was blindsided when I woke up to the first episode’s release online, in full- I was already planning to wait until later to watch it on television, so having it permanently accessible from the internet was such a pleasant surprise! And the show… The show, man- That premiere caught me off-guard with how much I enjoyed it! I knew I was looking forward to this show, but still…! It blew away my expectations, and even now, has continued to; It was like my personal investment and attention had paid off so patiently well! I even got a DisneyNOW subscription so I could watch each new episode ASAP, the day it premiered, hours before it aired on television!

I remember scouring Tumblr before the show officially premiered, and there was understandably very little- A few pieces of fanart here or there. And when the show DID premiere, for a while there wasn’t really much of a fandom- There was barely anyone, in fact! But I can remember a few notable blogs who have been around since the beginning… Me, I got invested into this show. I found myself really enjoying Lumity as a ship, especially since I resonated with both characters in it; Luz was such a ball of sunshine that brightened my day, and Amity really spoke to me with her more introverted, top-scoring personality. When the show hit its mid-season hiatus, I remember not handling it too well, as I got impatient and frantic in my speculations- I wanted so badly to learn more about these characters, see what happened- Get a look at Emperor Belos (then known as Bellows by the fandom), etc.

I wrote my Bile Coven piece in preparation for Halloween, even got to know a mutual or two over shared theorizing! I kept track of Dana’s updates, and even had people come to my blog, of all places, to send asks! It was and still has been such an engaging part of fandom for me… I recall impatiently waiting for the Owl Pellet shorts and freaking out over them- And when Adventures in the Elements leaked early? I LOST MY MIND, I remember postponing something I was supposed to go to, just so I could watch the episode- And it was so good! Then I started wondering and hoping the rest of Season 1 would come out, and well- It took a while…

And when Season 1B’s trailer came out, I was all over it; Scouring every possible frame, freaking out over the Grom screenshot, and appreciating the influx of new fans! It was amazing to watch The Owl House go from a relatively minor and obscure fandom, to becoming so much more mainstream and populous! I got into Rebecca Rose’s channel, I began writing more meta and posts about the show, as well as little recaps for each new episode. I feel like my blog really took off from here, as I got to interact with more and more people who shared this mutual love of The Owl House, and I was so ecstatic to see more content and buzz about it!

My mind was solely focused on The Owl House, it was one of my huge hyperfixations, even moreso than during Season 1A’s run- I remember being anxious about Enchanting Grom Fright, wondering if we’d get queerbaited… But NO, Amity was in love with Luz! She canonically had a crush on her, a girl in love with another girl- And I loved it because Lumity was a special comfort ship of mine! Then Amity was confirmed lesbian… It was amazing! And I found myself SO invested, so inspired by the show and its characters, and all of the little allusions to things, the foreshadowing, the moments here or there that made so much more sense after a new episode.

This show inspired me creatively- It got me to write some of my personal favorite fanfics, and I was and still am so touched by whatever feedback I get from them! The Owl House really got me to write, to obsess over characters and analyze them, to look at motifs, to think about worldbuilding… It’s been such an artistically enriching experience, both the show and the fandom! I remember despairing so terribly when Agony of a Witch came out, the genuine betrayal I had when Lilith revealed the truth- Because I’d been legitimately endeared to her character beforehand, even formed a sort of ‘trust’ in a sense… And like many others, I agonizingly anticipated the season finale, the much-needed emotional reconciliation!

I remember how the episode titles were revealed, bit by bit, and how I and others speculated on what they’d spell out! I remember when the fandom obsessed over the Witch’s Apprentice game and its relics, for clues and new lore after each episode, the little hints here or there! I was freaked out by characters like Belos, who lived up to my hopes and expectations- First being alluded to by name, then his amazing appearance… And then his voice and mannerisms and everything about him! And when the Season Finale came out…

Well, there was relief. But there was a bittersweet emptiness- That it was over! The first season was over! There was a celebratory triumph, of course- We finally wrapped up the first, major arc of the show, the first batch of episodes that had been worked upon, the whole thing now unveiled and appreciated! But I was a little dismayed because a part of me KNEW a hiatus much longer than the previous one was ahead of me, and I did not handle the mid-season hiatus well. Of course, then Dana had her Reddit AMA, and the charity livestream; Both of which NOURISHED me creatively, and have helped to fill out the wait! To carry out my momentum, to not flounder about in hiatus; I invested myself into more meta, into various posts, etc. I read fanfiction that genuinely floored me, obsessed over fanart, etc.

I supported the show’s release on Disney Plus, ecstatic to get this kind of ready access. I revisited past episodes and characters, looking at them in a new light, appreciating things; Like Luz’s relationship with fantasy… King’s surprising development, all of Eda’s little hints and clues. There’s been an emotional catharsis with these characters for me- And I genuinely feel like I’ve been a lot happier lately because of this show! I’ve met so many other blogs and gotten to know them, seen their ideas and displayed mine as we appreciated one another… I even remember doing another blog’s fanart prompt prior to the show’s release, in preparation!

I feel like The Owl House has genuinely given me a new appreciation for meta, for fandom and analysis… For headcanons, for writing my own stories and contributing my own ideas and speculations, etc.! It’s contributed SO much joy to me as a hyperfixation, and rapidly risen through my blog as my most frequent tag! And even as I explore other fandoms and hyperfixations, both then and now, especially to pass on this crippling hiatus… This show holds a VERY special place in my heart for me. It’s really made me feel for these characters, the love and sadness, the excitement and sense of comfort… Its love and emotions, angst and found family, lore and speculation, it hits so hard to me in a way that other media hasn’t!

It’s provided representation- Such as canonically queer characters, or protagonists who speak so well to the neurodivergent experience for many people! I’ve had delight in seeing people suggest Amity as autistic, when before Season 1B, I lowkey headcanoned and saw her as such- So seeing more evidence for this resonated deeply in my heart! I remember all of the discussion about King as a character, the confusion and talk about whether or not he WAS a King of Demons, when that first announcement in 2018 had made a similar claim… I looked forward to Eda and Lilith’s relationship, speculated on who cursed Eda, and remembered when I’d considered the Blights as a potential culprit! I remember thinking about Hooty, wondering what his deal is- And thinking then and now about that Owl Deity mural in the Owl House! Watching Luz’s development as a character and as a witch, seeing her become more proficient with magic until it finally pays off with her squaring up against Belos, and wounding him- I’d never felt so proud of a character and their progress before!

There’s still so many more questions and mystery, lore… as well as just genuine character interactions, to look forward to! I think The Owl House is one of my favorite shows of all time… It’s deeply touched me as a person and creator, and I genuinely strive to create something even close to this one day. This show has inspired me, made me laugh and cry, compelled me to creatively make content; It’s introduced me to a wider fandom that I genuinely feel like a part of, had me meet other mutuals… It really is something special to me. And while I am eager for Season 2, I also want to appreciate what Dana Terrace and her crew have already established. I love this show’s art style and animation, the designs and overall weirdness of its characters- I love speculating and thinking about them, getting more and more details, and so forth.

If it’s for a better product, I’m fine waiting for Season 2. And honestly, I love what we already have, and I’ve done a lot with so many people. I’ve even looked over supplementary materials and stuff posted by the crew or news articles, in my need for content… And I love every bit of update, art, and/or acknowledgement of the show’s hiatus, and Season 2’s development! There’s so much to look forward to… And there’s so much that I’ve enjoyed, after plenty of anticipation!

Thank you @danaterrace, and everyone who worked on this- For everything. It really is crazy to reflect on this entire year, to realize it’s been a full year since that first episode, since that first premiere that lit up my world like Luz’s light spells; And it feels like such a milestone that we’ve reached! I look forward to what comes next, and I also intend to keep appreciating and cherishing what we’ve already gotten. Here’s to this show’s second year, people- It’s been such a journey to look back on and remember each step, each phase, each particular moment and stage… And I can only imagine what will come next! This show has SUCH a special place in my heart, and has made me feel in so many ways I haven’t before!

Happy Birthday, The Owl House! You’ve earned it!

#the owl house #toh #owl house #the owl house luz #luz noceda #the owl house eda #edalyn clawthorne #the owl house king #lumity #happy birthday #dana terrace #ramblings #nostalgia #meta

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