#we get trained for this shit for 3years for what

[zahnaufzahn]

im trying to stay hopeful and inspire people to reflect and learn but the further we get into this apprenticeship the angrier and dejected I become. people refusing to learn anything thats got nothing to do with their personal lives is so frustrating to observe. you look at people and you want to shake them and shake them and scream "why arent u opening ur eyes? the world is so big LOOk u IDIOT" and they keep them shut so tight and scream back "no no i dont care haha"

[baekuras]

I have also now spent 3 nights in a row being upset at working at my current job because I can’t go experiment with my style in any meaningful way

Like yes plain black shirt+pants are a nice safe option and work clothes being different from party clothes or even everyday ones is fine

But I can’t go experiment with my hair, I can’t go experiment with makeup and let’s not even start with tattoos

and I really, really, REALLY wanna do that

I hate going to the hairdresser but there are also some hairstyles I just wanna try which all lean towards a generally more messy or shaggy appearance, right down into shaving the sides because I just wanna...try many things out

and my coworkers may be all ‘oh but you are so young and pretty you should go dress nicely’ etc but ‘dress nicely’ means shit like a blouse and ballerinas and not ‘my style’

it just irritates me so much because I am so not going to go get like a blunt bob (i have wavy/up to curly hair and i will not straighten it every.single.morning for like an hour and harden it to stone with god knows how much product for it to stay that specific shape AND commit to it-i barely commit to having my fringe at preferred length and not in the awkward between stage bc i cant be bothered)

+i also just...want tattoos? and not just a teeny tiny hidden one

I at LEAST want one on my arm, preferrebly even forearm if not a full sleeve because I just like the look, but i havent even bothered looking into that or what i’d really want etc because i know I cant wear it at work and I dont wanna have to cover up every single day

i need a job with 0 dresscode shits, not customer service/retail style and with good pay without a college degree i dont even wanna redo the 3year training bit for any new thing

I LOVE learning how shit works for anything in any field but dear god does switching jobs seem like a waste of time because before you can make any meaningful money they want to train you for so.fucking.long

understandable but also...i dont have the time the way shit is going i wouldn’t be surprised if we died before getting a whiff of our pension

just lemme actually go have fun in my own style i am in my early 20s ffs, isn’t that like whats supposed to happen or does this only count for people in college (which i dont think i can go into unless i get a higher education which means at LEAST another like year of studying general crap including math which ew before doing anything afaik god I hate this system so much right now)

[break-dancing-spaghetti]

I don’t normally do this and feel like shit for asking, but desperate times call for desperate measures. If my husband and I don’t come up with 5k to cover half the charges we owe on our home, 10k to fully be caught up, our mortgage company is going to foreclose our home.

My husband was fired from his career, dream job right after we got our home almost 3years ago and has been working any other jobs he can get to try and make payments. Some places won’t hire him cz he’s “overqualified” and just when we start to get back on our feet he’s been laid off, “due to Covid” is always the excuse… he’s just started a new job but the mortgage company says we have to pay $5,000 usd to stop them from foreclosing by October. We’ve kept in contact with them to tell them everything that’s going on and made what payments we could, honestly we’ve only missed 6months total in the 3years we’ve been struggling. They said some months could be put on back pay until recently. I’ve done what I can, but was laid off a minimum wage job that was just keeping little bills/utilities paid. I have medical problems that make it hard to find a new job, a heart condition and depression that makes most things very hard to do I am now 7months pregnant to top it off (which exasperates the heart condition). As of now we won’t be able to pay utilities or get our dogs their food until we can work this out. We have 3 fur babies we both adore, my service dog who is getting ready to retire, my service dog in training, and my husband’s love bug of a pup. If anyone could help even if it’s just help get dog food so our fur babies don’t starve it would mean so much to me and my husband.

Here’s my cash app: $iloikfood

Here’s a gofundme link too:

https://gofund.me/9fdad23e

[mrpirodude]

I've always been outside

All through my life I've been an outsider. Some cases people do it unintentionally, sometimes on purpose. My best friend and I have had the same conversation many times because he feels the same way. We ave this sneaking suspicion that we're mentally handicapped but we can't tell and no one has said anything about it simply to be PC. I wasn't very well welcomed by the kids I went to school with. They grew up with Disney channel, lady gaga, and I phones. I grew up with Andy Griffith, the rolling stones, and a qwerty keyboard phone. Through middle school I tried to embrace my weirdness. I tried to make that my personality in hopes that people would love me for it. In highschool I saw it wasn't working and I grew angry. I grew resentful of those who wouldn't accept me. My first job was a dishwasher at Duffys sports grill and I finally felt accepted. The wait staff adored me because I was quirky and they thought it was fun I was "such a hippy". Even after not working there for 3years they greet me with big smiles. Next I joined the Army in November of 2015. I felt welcomed by my battle buddies at reception and through red phase despite my injury and mistakes I made. When they sent us home for Christmas and new years things changed. My injury had gotten worse and when we returned I felt that familiar sting of being an outcast again. My suggestions fell on deaf ears and my presence was treated as a burden and annoyance more than anything. I was different and again I was being shunned for it. Soon, about 2 days into blue phase, I was sent to an rhu due to my injury and failing moral. Rhu was quite the experience. I spent 308 or more hours with 80+ guys. I was welcomed by kind but cautious men. Everyone had a chip on their shoulder and their guard up but they weren't taking it out on anyone. Like any large group of people, it quickly split into factions. The African Americans had their group, the rednecks had theirs. The people getting discharged from AIT hardly mixed with those getting discharged from BCT, and then it split between those who were discharged from reception and those who made it through red phase. I finally felt accepted and by all things it was by fellow "failures". There were those who tested positive for drugs, those who were injured, those who were caught fraternizing, those who couldn't pass the APFT and just a few oddballs who got through meps physical exams but not reception physical exams. We all excepted each other and supported each other how we could. Some of us did a few favors for some extra cash like myself, I gave massages for a dollar. I made about $40 in my time there. Others worked multiple fireguard shifts for some extra cash. Some commissioned artwork. The people who excepted me most were those who also got discharged from my company which comprised of 1 positive drug test from someone who would have made an excellent soldier, 3 failed APFT people, 1 who just flat out quit, 3 who were having suicidal thoughts, and 2 others who were injured. Although it was a shitty time, I kind of miss the people of my RHU. I was ofically discharged in march of 2016. When I came home I took a long motorcycle trip on my 1985 Honda rebel 250. I rode that thing with an 80lb rucksack from Palm Beach, Florida to Dothan, Alabama. It took me 15 hours and cost me about $25 in gas believe it or not. I was visiting my friends up there. The same friend who I have that repetitive conversation with and his girlfriend. He welcomed me with open arms but from her I could feel a certain resentment for some reason. I had assumed it was because she thought I was a joke for having failed to complete basic training. This prepared me for what I thought was going to be a long life of hiding in shame my failures. Even now I can't go a day without thinking about the Army and u really wish I could. I'm not trying to put myself on the same level as combat veterans with PTSD, They've most definitely have it worse than me, but Army BCT had a profound effect on me and I wish I could escape it. from that trip I returned to work at Publix and stayed there until July 15th, 2017. Now I work at an animal hospital and I'm getting ready to start school. I'm going to lose some weight and get back into shape like I was when I was discharged. I'm joining the police academy to be a wildlife officer. My beautiful girlfriend Hailey has been there for me since may 10th 2016. She has been a huge support in everything from buying my Harley and fixing it, to buying my first truck, helping me while my dad has been fighting cancer, to supporting me in my dream of being a wildlife officer. I love her so much and she inspires me every day to keep pushing though the shit till I strike gold. For her and I its only up from here. I know not many people will read this and even fewer will even care but its sure nice to have it all written out and out of my head, even if it only lasts a little while. I hope you've enjoyed my story thus far and will join me for the remainder of it.

[baekuras]

nearing the end of my 3year job training shit, whatever you call it in english, and i am so unsure if i should add another 1.5 years to get my master and earn a little tiny bit more where i am rn or go work at a clinic or some shit just don’t know if i care for that enviroment but i am also not spending 1.5years and money on getting ~300bucks per month more i don’t even care for this job but thats not a surprise, i don’t have a job i have seen and gone “omg i HAVE TO do this”

this is literally just because otherwise the state would make me work god knows what kinda trash and because i need money and don’t want to completely rot when i can finally stop working at...well 75 or smth probably by the time we get good old old people pay.............aka money i am making rn and boy am i not getting into my gripes with a helpful system that is crumbling apart because people didn’t have enough foresight or whatever