#we get cisheteronormativity and depression

[wangxianficfinder]

In the mood for...

Oct 27th

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1. Hiii, i have a request for the next ITMF: please recommend some lengthy canon divergence fics in which lan xichen gets told off for believing JGY over LWJ. Like the fact that he believed someone from another sect (especially the Jin) over his own brother is called out.

Ofcourse wangxian pairing with a happy ending for them.

Extra plus if it's not jiang cheng friendly or not jgy friendly.

Thank you 🙏

Discarded by teawater (E, 187k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Dying Lan children, Hurt/Comfort, YL WWX, Golden Core Reveal, Case Fic, Depression, Family Issues, Self-Esteem Issues, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Worth Issues, Angst with a Happy Ending, and it’s not always dark, POV Multiple, BAMF WWX, dubious morals in the Lan sect Feels, Pining, Grief, Fix-It, BAMF LWJ) if they don't mind a WIP

A Life Without Regrets by naqaashi (M, 163k, WangXian, JFM & WWX, JC & WWX, WRH & WWX, LXC & LWJ, LQR & LWJ, LWJ & NHS, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Crack Treated Seriously, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Murder Husbands, PTSD, BAMF WWX, Cultivation Sect Politics, Genius WWX, Cultivation Theory, Sentient Burial Mounds, Dysfunctional Family, Grief/Mourning, Angry WWX, No Golden Core Transfer, BAMF LWJ, Angry LWJ, One-Braincell WangXian, Idiots in Love, Requited Love, Requited Unrequited Love, Soft WangXian, Married WangXian, Soulmates, Not Cultivation World Friendly, Immortal WWX, Canon-Typical Violence, Not JC Friendly, Not Yunmeng Jiang friendly, not gusu lan friendly, Immortal LWJ) its not the Main Focus, but LX issues gets adressed

Twelve Moons and a Fortnight by stiltonbasket (M, 290k, WangXian, Humor, Slow Burn, Post-Canon Fix-It, Long-Distance Relationship, Epistolary, Love Letters, Family Feels, a-qing lives, teenage romance, Adoption, Romantic Comedy, Happy Ending, Weddings, Case Fic, Parenthood, Politics) link in #8 there's an epic scene where lxc calls himself (and the more toxic Lan rules) out, and dedicates himself to being a more proactive sect leader, set after canon.

Arrayed by FirefliesNLightningBugs (M, 5k, wangxian, angst w/ happy ending, LSZ found by LXC, LSZ keeps his memories, alive JYL & JZX, canon temporary character death, WIP) shows lxc slowly realizing that he did this and that was stupid from his pov, set post 1st siege of bm.

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2. Hello! IMTF fics that deal with self-discovery. Whether it be coming to terms with being queer or gender stuff or kink. Just grappling with identities and the social tumult that comes along with navigating them, purity culture, cisheteronormativity, etc. Just smth along those lines.

Thank you!!

KILF (Knits I’d Like To Fuck in) by ScarlettStorm (E, 168k, WangXian, Modern, Established Relationship, Porn, like in the writing and also as a plot point, onlyfans au, sex worker WWX, Fashionista LWJ, in this house we support sex workers, Fluff and Smut, they're horny and in love, mental health, therapy is good actually, Domestic Bliss, tender kink, Fiber Arts, autistic LWJ, neurodivergent WWX, switch rights, Nonbinary NHS, a soupçon of gender, get in losers we're introspecting about queerness, Genderfluid Character, Gender Exploration, perhaps slightly more than a soupçon of gender, Hurt/Comfort, past trauma, But They're Working Through It, aggressive mutual caretaking)

reports of my heterosexuality may have been exaggerated by sysrae (E, 8k, wangxian, modern, college/university au, getting together, straight boy LWJ, disaster gay WWX, heteronormativity, hockey player WWX, little angst)

Pride and Prejudice by sami (T, 3k, WangXian, Pride, Parades, Cats)

❤️ save a sword, ride a socialist by sysrae (E, 33k, wangxian, modern w magic, college/university au, fake/pretend relationship, single parent WWX, homophobia, light angst w/ happy ending, idiots to lovers, fluff)

without your new eyes by anaphoricae (E, 66k, WangXian, Modern, Didn’t Know They Were Dating, Sexuality Discovery, Self-Discovery, Literal Sleeping Together, (there is so much sleeping in this fic), mentions of WWX/others and LWJ/others, Drunk LWJ, Teacher LWJ, WWX is a… throws dart… computer scientist, No Angst, Jealous WWX, Flirty WWX, Eventual Smut, Bottom LWJ, Fluff, Non-Sexual Intimacy, WWX’s Love Language is Physical Touch, [Podfic] without your new eyes by anaphoricae by LadyEn)

this body is a gift for you by loosingletters (T, 1k, MXY & WWX, Trans Female WWX, Trans MXY, Canon Divergence, Gender Identity, Self-Discovery, Gender Roles)

The Sculptor by Eleanor_Fenyx (M, 27k, wangxian, LQY/WQ, LWJ & WQ, SL/XXC, modern, lavender marriage, period typical attituted and terminology, mute SL, queer themes, queer families, slow burn, getting together, intimacy, artist WWX, professor LWJ) autumn flower by ScarlettStorm (E, 78k, WIP, WangXian, Modern AU, no magic vague north american setting, transwoman wwx, transwoman lwj, Gender Experimentation, Angst with a Happy Ending, Gender Dysphoria, followed by gender euphoria, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, switch rights) Its trans fem lan zhan descovering herself and how to let herself be true to herself, and wei ying (also transfem) was a big part of cracking her egg. It's still ongoing and it's really good!

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3. ITMF fics that explore wwx’s cultivation - canon dynamics, preferably not cql compliant please!

🔒 Ad Oblivione by Baph, HikariNoHimeWriter (M, 70k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, Temporary Character Death, Canon-Typical Violence, POV Multiple, Hurt/Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Identity Reveal, Golden Core Reveal, Cultivation World Critical, Not JC Friendly, Abusive YZY, Angst with a Happy Ending)

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4. Hello! And thank you so much for all you do!! I’m in the mood for a fic set in canon universe where wangxian start a friends with benefits kind of thing, where they start having sex without discussing their feelings.

Always Light My Way by cqlorphan (E, 27k, wangxian, Post-Canon, Getting Together, Friends With Benefits, to lovers, wherein dual cultivation may be counted as a benefit, Jealous WWX, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Pining while fucking, angsty sex, Versatile | Switch WangXian, Bottom LWJ, Service Top LWJ, Topping from the Bottom, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Coming Untouched, Dom/sub Undertones, the angsty sex happens in the beginning but they get past it dw, Oblivious LWJ, archer WWX, Smart WWX, Porn with Feelings, Panic Attacks, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dual Cultivation)

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5. ITMF a fic similar to hyperballad by azuresummer please!

🔒 姻緣 | this marriage was always predestinedby saccharinings (E, 43k, wangxian, Cheating, Infidelity, not between wangxian, WWX is married and LWJ persuades him to cheat on his husband with him, Dark LWJ, A/B/O, Feminizing Language, Exhibitionism, Size Difference, WagnXian Have a Breeding Kink, Stomach Bulge, Possessive LWJ, Manipulation, WWX Wears Lingerie, Rape/Non-con Elements, for one part, Hair-pulling Kink, Alpha LWJ, Omega WWX, Mirror Sex, Vibrators, Phone Sex, Rimming, Edgeplay, slight choking kink, Light Bondage, Inappropriate Use of Gūsū Lán Forehead Ribbon, LJY’s Big Fat Crush on Milfxian, Pregnant WWX, WangXian Endgame, Spanish Translation) maybe. It has some common elements but ah no murder I think. A Wen does get screwed over.

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6. Hey its for the ITMF.

"A harmony between qin and se" by alaceron is one of my all-time favourites. It'd be great if you could recommend some wangxian fics with household intrigue and scheming. Lwj being a simp as a bonus is even better!! (doesn't matter if wwx is a male or female)

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7. ITMF fics where WWX and LWJ end up accidentally married. Or ones where they end up married because of political/economic reasons. Canon era fics are preferred but will accept modern era if it’s the “we got married for tax benefits but i’m actually in love with you” kind of trope. Mpreg only if it’s really good please.

a long time coming by syriala (G, 2k, WangXian, Getting Together, Pining, Accidental Marriage, except it's not so accidental, Supportive LXC, Fluff)

30 Days of Secret Marriage at Cloud Recesses by starandrea (T, 43k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Bunnies, Gusu Lan Forehead Ribbon, Accidental Marriage, Coming Out, Falling In Love, supportive family, Fluff, Happy Ending, the whole story is happy)

🔒 the world passes by but for me there is only you by beeswaxing (E, 82k, wangxian, canon divergence, fix-it of sorts, golden core reveal, accidental marriage, love confessions, horny teenagers, pining, fluff, everybody lives, first time)

play your love songs all night long by AlfAlfAlfAlfAlf, tardigradeschool (E, 17k, WangXian, Modern AU, Marriage of Convenience, Mutual Pining, Light Angst, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, One Big Happy Family, Sharing a Bed, (platonically for 13 years), Therapy, in the grand tradition of the untamed most of this is flashback, Pegging, Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, Romantic Comedy, Misunderstandings)

Only Fools Rush In by vesna (mrsronweasley) (E, 27k, WangXian, Modern, Woke Up Married, alcohol use but no sex happens while drunk, Mutual Pining, Getting Together, what happens in Vegas etc etc)

What If….. Jiang Cheng Understood? by ToxicAngel13 (M, 66k, WIP, WangXian, Ribbons, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, WangXian Get Married in the Cold Springs Cave, Protective JC, Confused WWX, Angry LWJ, Fix-It of Sorts, Good Uncle LQR, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, POV LQR, YZY Bashing, POV JFM, Not JFM Friendly, Hurt/Comfort, Protective NHS)

The Simplest Way Forward by harriet_vane (E, 70k, WangXian, Modern AU, Accidental Baby Acquisition,Kid Fic, explicit in much much later chapters, green card marriage (but not really), pining for your own husband, endless pining, Slow Burn, Happy Ending, Nothing else bad or traumatic happens to the baby, [Podfic of] The Simplest Way Forward by knight_tracer) LWJ is in love when they effectively get married for tax purposes, and WWX gets there, and of course there's lots of pining for your husband

🔒 Two Weddings and a Family Reunion by scifigeek14 (T, 36k, wangxian, canon divergence, shotgun wedding, politics, everyone lives au, fix-it, feelings realization, family feels, marriage proposal, marriage of convenience)

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8. Hello! I am new to the fandom, I just finished watching the drama and I want more!!! I have been recced to your blog for fic suggestions? May I please have suggestions for canon compliant stories that are mostly light hearted (no heavy angst please)? I really enjoyed the mood in the first part of the show when all the characters were energetic and goofy teens, so perhaps some fics set then? I want more of the world, clans, costumes, etc. World building is maybe the right word? Thank you so much!

It’s Only Time by etymologyplayground (T, 8k, WangXian, Epistolary, Post-Canon, Canon Compliant, It’s About The Yearning., Getting Together, Love Confessions, Cuddling & Snuggling, Humor) this one is tagged as Post-Canon Canon Compliant so I hope it's okay

Twelve Moons and a Fortnight by stiltonbasket (M, 290k, WangXian, Humor, Slow Burn, Post-Canon Fix-It, Long-Distance Relationship, Epistolary, Love Letters, Family Feels, a-qing lives, teenage romance, Adoption, Romantic Comedy, Happy Ending, Weddings, Case Fic, Parenthood, Politics)

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9. ITMF: No JGY redemption. Like, he has many choices or someone give him another path to take but he still choose the unforgivable one. I dont want it from JGY's POV. I want it to focus on WWX story like in canon i guess? Thanks!

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10. For itmf, I'm craving some angst with a happy ending fics! Established relationship wangxian where they fight and/or break up and both of them are hurting a lot, but they make up and get back together. Thank you!

🔒 Wish I could forget the taste of your skin and the feel of your hands pinning me down by KizuKatana (E, 63k, wangxian, WQ & WWX & WN, Modern Cultivation, weapons-grade thirst, Getting Back Together, Trying REALLY hard to not still like your Ex, but failing, BAMF WWX, BAMF LWJ, Canon Divergence, Case Fic, LWJ’s canonically big dick, sort of a ‘thirsting for your co-worker ex’ vibe, it eventually gets worked out, Mutual Pining, Guest-starring LWJ’s canonically poor communication choices after romantic cave encounters, novel canon relationship dynamics, basically this fic is about escalating sexual tension)

estuaries by vesna (mrsronweasley) (E, 34k, wangixan, modern, breakup/makeup, pining while fucking, single dad WWX, angst w/ happy ending)

Tempo Rubato by Spodumene (E, 108k, wangxian, modern, angst w/ happy ending, romance, persuasion au, separations, pining, miscommunication, depression, self-harm, reconciliation, smut)

💖 love wakes me by dea_liberty (E, 46k, wangxian, modern, angst w happy ending, childhood sweethearts, misunderstanding, famous LWJ, coffee shop owner WWX, found families, grand romantic gestures)

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11. (This part added to fic finder, fic might be decay by antebunny)

Also, if you know any fics with similar plot (like Wei Ying being forced to cleanse from RE for "his own good" and getting hurt instead), i would appreciate the recommendations! Thank you 🍁 @shellennium

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12. I am hoping someone has fanfic with

A. Wei Wuxian becoming miserable after marrying into the Lan sect, a bit of lxc/lqr bashing but with them eventually realizing they were wrong, also if Wei Wuxian tries to commit suicide it would be better

B. Fanfics in which wwx doesn't want to have children but is forced because he is lwj's husband

C. Wwx having a parental figure for the first time, I don't want it to be the Jiang parents but anyone else is fine

Also, no jyl or long lwj bashing, please

12A)

Practical Considerations by teawater, the_anthropologist (E, 97k, WangXian, JC & WWX, LXC & WWX, LQR & WWX, Arranged Marriage, Canon Divergence, Found Family, Spouses to Lovers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Politics, Scheming, Lán Elders are assholes, BAMF WWX, BAMF LWJ, eventually BAMF LXC, learning to make decisions, Learning Self-worth, Self-Esteem Issues, Sweet Wangxian, Domestic Fluff, Fix-It, JC is a big asshole, he improves somewhat but it’s open-ended, WWX learns to stand up for himself, Quote: Come Back to Gusu With Me, POV wwx, POV LWJ, POV JC, Golden Core Reveal, Teacher wwx, Golden Core Transfer Fix-It, Alcohol as a Coping Mechanism, Past Suicidal Thoughts, Post-Sunshot Campaign, WWX Protection Squad, Feelings Realization, WWX protector of the twin jades, Protective LWJ, Protective WWX, Protective LQR, Demonic Cultivator WWX, WWX is Loved, Married WangXian, Genius WWX, Everybody Lives)

Concord by Deastar (T, 41k, WangXian, Arranged Marriage, Gusu Lan Sect Rules, Depression, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending)

12C)

safe here with me by xcourtney_chaoticx (G, 3k, WangXian, Family Feels, Good Uncle LQR, WWX Goes to Gusu, Fluff, Childhood Friends, Friends to Lovers, Food Issues, Endgame WangXian)

Scars of Lightning by The_peregrine_falcon (T, 6k, YZY & WWX, WWX & WRH, WangXian, YZY’s A+ Parenting, Canon Divergence, Not Canon Compliant, Wen WWX, zidian, YZY is a bitch, Canon-Typical Violence, Blood and Injury, Major Character Injury, Heavy Angst, Lotus Pier, Nightless City, Young WWX, Muteness, Hurt kind of comfort)

藍色的花，紅色的蘭 {Lan se de hua, hongse de lan} by Admiranda, AshayaTReldai (M, 45k, WIP, WangXian, Orphan WWX, Friends to Lovers, Childhood Friends, wwx raised in the lan clan, softer lqr, Good Uncle LQR, Good lan clan, Good Older Sibling LXC)

🔒 crying like a fire in the sun by Reverie (cl410) (T, 10k, WangXian, SongXiao, BSSR/LY, Runaway WWX, Canon Divergence, Everyone Lives/Nobody Die, rogue cultivator WWX, Angst, Post Cloud Recesses, Not YZY Friendly, Happy Ending, BSSR is WWX’s grandmother instead of grandmaster)

Crimson leaves by barisan (T, 4k, WangXian, WWX & OFC(s), WWX Leaves the Yunmeng Jiang Sect, Rogue Cultivator WWX, WWX gets lesbian grandmothers, WWX learns about his parents, WWX is a Wen, (Through his lesbian granny but still), Getting Together, WWX Has a Fear of Dogs, Pre-Canon, Genius WWX)

All Things Belong by kuroi_atropos (M, 93k, WRH & WWX, WangXian, WN & WWX, WWX is a Wen, Abuse, Whipping, Manipulations, Warning: WRH, Smart WWX, Possessive Behavior, Warning: JGS, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Past Rape/Non-con, Society Level Victim Blaming, Victim Blaming)

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13. Hii, so I'm looking for fics kinda enemies to lovers but not exactly 😅 like one of them is reluctant to get together at first? Or at least it looks like it, like in All The Roads or The earthquake in the room, both the I highly recommend btw. Thanks a lot @akutamichan

baby let’s take the long way home by plonk (Not rated, 10k, WangXian, Modern with Magic, Abortion, Mpreg, With A Twist, Enemies to Lovers)

🔒 no certainty of doors between us by betts (T, 6k, WangXian, Modern AU, College/University, Roommates, Crack Treated Seriously, Drunken Confessions, Idiots in Love, dubiously consensual spooning, Enemies to Lovers, Sharing Clothes, Hurt/Comfort, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, wwx’s casual intimacy meets lwj’s touch starvation, wwx doesn’t know they’re enemies, lwj doesn’t know they’re dating)

varied my velocities by fantasiavii (E, 58k, WangXian, Modern AU, Ballerina LWJ, Football/Soccer player WWX, Enemies to Lovers, Top WWX/Bottom LWJ, Dom WWX, Angst with a happy ending, Internalized homophobia)

🔒 The Second Jade of Lan’s late but incendiary sexual awakening by KizuKatana (E, 41k, wangxian, First Time, LWJ’s Horny Grip, LWJ does not know what hit him, and yet somehow he still realizes it before WWX, canon wangxian dynamics, college AU, LWJ starts off annoyed at WWX, But quickly discovers both his competency kink and a caretaking kink, Genius WWX)

Documented Fact by Scrippio (T, 7k, WangXian, LSZ & LJY & OYZZ, Modern with Magic, College/University, Professors, Minor Injuries, Misunderstandings, Fluff, OYZZ POV, Humor) which features married Wangxian but everyone believes they're enemies.

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14. This account is a treasure!!! What I’m looking for are the post WWX resurrection fics that address Wangxian age gap. Can be fun, kinky, healing, basically anything. @feanarotherindion

Help, My Dad Is Fucking Someone My Age!! by sweetlolixo (T, 3k, WangXian, LSZ & LWJ, Canon Divergence, Humor, Crack, Fluff, Romance)

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15. I recently read fic While covered in mud by merthurlin. And I really love badass Huaisang who takes matters into his own hands earlier in the story. Is there any more fic where Huaisang went into Burial Mounds like that? Or just awesome badass scary Huaisang in general. I have huge need to read some badass Huaisang who will get recognized for his mastery too.

Story-Shaped by lingering_song (T, 13k, NHS & WWX, wangxian, Post-Canon, Chief Cultivator LWJ, Inventor WWX, Found Family, NHS needs a new hobby, And apparently that’s spoiling his Wei-Xiong, Mentioned Character Death, Alcohol, Protective NHS, WangXian Endgame, Not JC Friendly, Not particularly gentry sects friendly overall tbh)

💖 demons run when a good man goes to warby Miranda_Aurelia (T, 20k, wangxian, LWJ & NHS, JYL/JZX, canon divergence, angst w happy ending, NHS & LWJ friendship, not JGY friendly, dark LWJ, revenge, (presumed) major character death, not LXC friendly)

The Lost Cause by KouriArashi (T, 18k, JGY & NHS, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Murder Bros, NHS is a boss bitch, JGY is a hot mess, Everybody Lives, except the people who suck, (lookin at you JGS and JZN))

The Threads of Fate by WaitForTheSnitch (E, 78k, WangXian, WIP, Time Travel Fix-It, Canon Divergence, Not Everyone Dies, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Cloud Recesses Shenanigans, Good Uncle LQR, Protective LWJ, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, Pining LWJ, WWX in WWX's Body, JC & WWX Reconciliation, is it reconciliation if WWX doesn't know they were estranged?, Oblivious WWX, WWX Deserves Better, WWX Deserves Happiness, Siblings JC & WWX, Supportive JYL, Protective NHS, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Comic Book Science) If the requester doesn't mind a WIP, the frequently updating The Threads of Fate is another good one that features a brilliant Nie Huaisang.

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16. itmf for fics where lan wangji is very forward? in terms of flirting or expressing his adoration/ attraction for wei wuxian

can be canon or au or even modern au!

(just no side jc/wq please)

🔒Tangible by apathyinreverie (T, 2k, WangXian, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Canon Divergence, Fluff, Humor, Possessive LWJ, First Kiss, Getting Together, the library scene)

Tripped at Every Step by brooklinegirl (E, 28k, WangXian)

dream of a funeral; hear of a marriage by defractum (nyargles) (T, 36k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Happy Ending, Domestic Fluff, First Time, Fluff and Humor)

loveliness by orphan_account (T, 1k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Pining, Teen Romance, Getting Together)

body and soul by TooSel (E, 41k, wangxian, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Marriage Proposal, Everyone Lives AU, Cultivation Sect Politics, Yílíng Wèi Sect AU, Adoption, Smut, Friends to Lovers, Angst with a Happy Ending)

💖 Echo, Murmur, Dream, Here by bluerainmist (M, 51k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Universe Alteration, the yiling patriarch survives, Angst with a Happy Ending, Catharsis, Slow Burn, Drama, Getting Together, Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Melancholy, Love, Mutual Pining, Reunions, Love Confessions, Eventual Smut, Blow Jobs, Anal Sex, Switching, Grief/Mourning, fucking while pining, Implied/Referenced Torture, Self-Harm, golden core transfer, Playing fast and loose with worldbuilding, Battle Scenes, Canon-Typical Violence, Canonical Character Death, implied / Referenced suicide attempt, Sect Leader WWX, YLLZ WWX, Yílíng Wèi Sect)

❤️ Standing Engagement by x_los (M, 18k, wangxian, misunderstandings, accidental engagement, sunshot campaign, golden core reveal, accidental relationship, WQ lives, everyone lives au, Mojo’s post)

Give Me One Good Honest Kiss by thunderwear (T, 1k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, First Kiss, horny LWJ agenda, LXC is suffering in LQR’s name, [PODFIC] Give Me One Good Honest Kiss by thunderwear)

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17. ITMF where WWX agree to come to gusu in exchange of wen remnants protection. I want WWX accept the lan condirion to lock him up. I want him to live lifelessly/aphatic/just living because he is nit dead yet. Or maybe like in Always walked a very thin line by tucuxi.

Bonus if LWJ/LXC/LQR managed to make WWX scream at them and tell them whats wrong with him in anger. Thanks

The Forsaken Jade Statue by SaiaiSaiko (Not Rated, 7k, WangXian, Curse Breaking, Curses, WWX Goes to Gusu, Dark Gusu Lan Sect Imprisonment, Seclusion as Imprisonment, YLLZ WWX, Older LWJ, Older LXC, Cursed LWJ, petrification, Hopeful Ending) Wei Wuxian in 'Seclusion' for the Wen's protection and stumbling over Lan Wangji cursed to be a statue

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If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

[filmydidii]

HIIIIIII I had a quick question for you! If you don't feel comfortable answering that's totally fine but I'd really appreciate you answering!

What exactly are your beliefs on this entire transphobic, trans, terms stuff? I'm just sorta wondering because I've seen your posts with other people and was sorta confused! If you could just clear it up for me that would be amazing!

Hi. Thanks for questioning in good faith.

My beliefs are that no one is entitled to their assigned sex at birth. They are only entitled to individual experiences.

Saying "I am afab" brings baggages of implications, such as "the world has been unfair to me" and "i struggle biologically (gestation, periods, etc)"

And that's pretty lame.

You see, there is this idea in all of us, that "male and female" are opposites. These ideas have been beaten into us since childhood. "Male is big, female is small. Female is nurturer, male is stoic" etc. "Male and female are opposites."

When someone says "I am afab," they are telling you to assume their life as the "average female life."

And here is my issue:

At my birth, A doctor looked at my genitals and said that I am male, which I am not!

When someone says they are "afab" (thus "female," emotional, understanding, quiet, nurturing etc) they are automatically saying "I WAS GIVEN THE FEMALE ROLE AT BIRTH. YOU WERE GIVEN THE MALE ROLE AT BIRTH." And so, I become "amab" (thus "male," stoic, violent, scrutinising, mansplaining etc)

But the main problem?

I am a woman. I am female. And I may be trans, but that doesnt make me any less female. I do not have male privilige; I have been physically and sexually assualted my entire life because I am a woman, and I have been silenced my entire life because I am a transgender woman.

If you believe that a trans woman being assigned the male gender matters, then you believe that she, somewhere, in some way, is male.

Cisgender men benefit the most in conservative environments where they are gladly ready to carry out the succesful male roles handed out to them. And women find it hard to speak in these environments.

But here is the thing.

Almost no transgender woman gets to adorn those successful male roles. We don't perform those roles.

We do not get male privilige because we don't perform those roles.

We get called faggots and sissies. We get our clothes pulled and we get groped. We get yelled at and we spend all that time confused, and wondering if we will ever be allowed any empathy. We learn to get by our lives as masculine women who are percieved as male. We get into unhealthy relationships. We disassociate and fall into deep depression. We can't take good opportunities because they all require you to be hand of the patriarchs.

I personally had become an extra wife of my single father, he would beat me and yell at me and make me do all the chores. He didn't talk to me either. (If you let your thoughts wander into the previous points, you will know the dynamic taking place here.) And, I had to literally do sex work in my boys only highschool to survive the hostility of the boys.

—

In queer environments, queer people take refuge from the patriarchy and cisheteronormative judgement; The patriarchy is bad, the patriarchs are priviliged, and so they do not get to speak.

When you say "I am afab" you are putting fake privilige on the transgender woman. You are calling her "amab." You are saying that she is priviliged, and thus, does not deserve to speak.

Trans women can't speak in queer environments, and can't benefit from male privilige either. We learn to stay put and learn our places as doormats. And no one saves us.

This, is called Transmisogyny.

—

Also, as someone who is intersex, I want to make another important point:

Your AGAB does not define your life, your genitals, your body type or the rest of your life.

I was assigned male at birth without any confusion, but it turns out I have ovarian and uterine tissue in me, and that I might have XX chromosomes.

Alot of intersex people are assigned a different gender, without their consent, later in life.

And sex is social. And a spectrum.

Stop spreading misinformation, everyone.

Respect trans women and intersex people a little bit more.

[lovelyrotter]

actually yknow scratch that last part cause the way the epilogues are written makes it pretty explicit that theyre not '''dubiously canon''', thats a gimmic, transmasc roxy IS hard canon. and it pisses me off even more when ppl write him off in favour of headcanons instead, which leads to MORE transmasc vs transfem rhetoric bc transfem roxy is a really popular headcanon. like hes still a trans character. in canon. roxy is still trans even using she/her in candy. THEY ARE TRANS and that is CANON. would yall do that if roxy was revealed to be canonically transfem?? would yall disregard their canonical transgenderness in favour of your cisgendered headcanon? bet yall you wouldnt. bet thatd feel way more uncomfortable for a lotta people. this is disregarding the obvious and usual amount of transphobia canon trans characters get anyway from cis people. this is about trans community in-fighting and inter-community weirdly gendered favoritism and the weird mirroring of the more typical 'boys vs girls' logic from cishet culture

why do so many people dislike or outright hate the concept of he/him transmasc roxy but at the same time love june egbert and insist that shes hard canon... like can we cool it on the transmasc vs transfem '''war''' logic..... can we cool it on the open hatred for transmascs both real and fictional.... can we not appreciate both because theyre literally the same kind of dubiously canon

[highfaelucien]

I really enjoy your idea of friendship mates being a thing, especially for mor/az, because it would eliminate more of the toxic masculinity and possessiveness sjm tries to spin as romance and replace it with something else that isn’t explored much. Especially since the inner court is supposed to be a found family, it would tie in nicely to include deeper friendships among them.

I might explore it/write it anyway, tbh. Because Mor and Az deserve to have the connection and the understanding and the obvious love they had for each other in ACOMAF again.

I re-read some of their scenes the other day, and while I'm sure they were building up to a romantic relationship (bc that's what sjm do/The Ultimate Relationships Always Ever) they spoke of such a quiet, familiar intimacy:

Mor waiting for him/being there for his return from every single mission. Knowing he needs someone to greet him as Azriel, before he has to go to Rhys as spymaster.

Mor having the stubbornness to wear down his "infinite patience" to get him to open up, and talk about his feelings. Her being literally the only person he'll do that with.

Az being there for Mor in the Court of Nightmares, by her side, utterly willing to have everyone there know that he's hers for her comfort.

Interrupting Cassian to stop him saying too much.

Keeping eyes on each other when they get upset/overwhelmed by a situation or topic of conversation.

Az going dancing with Mor at Rita's whenever she asks - a victory for them both.

Mor knowing Azriel is in love with her but not pushing him to confront it. Not rushing him. Az acknowledging how much the inner circle means to both of them, how terrified she is to threaten that dynamic again, and refusing to ask her to do it.

This intimate, mutual stasis in their relationship, both longing for more, but being too respectful and understanding of the other to ever push them. And so they maintain.

And that didn't have to be fucking romantic. It could have been platonic. She didn't have to completely eradicate one of the most nuanced, subtle, and beautiful dynamics in the series just because she decided to make Mor a tormented lesbian.

And I will never, ever, EVER fucking forgive her for using 'I don't/can't love Azriel' as the method of her coming out.

Her voice broke as she said, “I don’t love Azriel.”

I remained perfectly still. Listening.

“No, that’s not true, either. I—I do love him. As my family. And sometimes I wonder if it can be … more, but … I do not love him. Not the way he—he feels for me.”

The big "dramatic reveal" shocking plot twist bit of dialogue here is "I don't love Azriel". And then she tries to backtrack/make that sound less bad, and 'I do love him as my family' but 'I do not love him the way he loves me.'

It's just. The whole thing is steeped in 'romantic love is the most valid/powerful kind of love and everything else is secondary'.

As if she and Azriel don't have as deep a connection, as strong a bond, as intense a relationship as Feyre and Rhys do just because they're romantically connected? As if 500 fucking years of devotion and adoration and connection and companionship isn't worth shit compared to 'what Az feels for her'. As if Azriel loves her more than she loves him becahse he wants to bone her and she doesn't want to bone him.

It's fucking infuriating. And it's fucking insulting as well.

The implication that ace people can't love their partners as much because they don't want sex.

The implication that aro people can never form meaningful bonds/love anyone as deeply as people in romantic relationships.

I call fucking bullshit. It's an absolute fucking disgrace and I'm still mad about it multiple years later.

And in ACOMAF she set up the idea of mates as like soulmates? You know. Two people who can understand each other and see each other and connect with each other more deeply than anyone else.

But then she had to introduce ~drama~ into into elucien and oh maybe they won’t get together. And then ACOWAR Rhys is coming out with ‘maybe the bond is just for who’ll make the nicest babies’ and I wanted to commit BLOODY MURDER.

So ace people can’t have bonds because they don’t want to bone?? Aro people can’t have bonds because it’s just for loving and having kids (which you know sjm only considers valid if it’s done by two people In Love/a typical nuclear family option). Gay people? Trans people?? Infertile straight people??? None of you or your bonds are valid because it’s just for making babies.

GO FUCK OFF.

Moriel as mates even after the utter DISASTER of Mor’s sexuality reveal is quite literally the only way to fix this fucking mess.

Saying ‘you don’t want to be in my bed, but you do want to share my life, you love me, and you understand me in a way no one else ever has. And that has always been enough for me. And it always will be. Because you’re my mate, and we’re bonded, and we’ll be there for each other whatever.’

And then they’re happy queer platonic people who live together and love each other but also have other partners, sometimes long-term, sometimes short-term, and they’re poly and happy and we expand the idea of mates beyond ‘we want to fuck non stop and we’ll eat you if you so much as look at our partner’ because I’m TIIIIIIIRREEEED and this could be so much MORE. It could be so deep. It could be so nuanced. It-

WAIT. I’VEJUST HAD A RANTING REVELATION.

I want ACOTAR mates to function exactly the same as the drift compatible concept in Pacific Rim. People who can just fucking vibe so hard their souls merge and they can control giant robots together.

And the grumpy TL;DR of this post is: if you don't think Mor and Az are drift compatible you can remove yourself from my blog for being BASIC AND WRONG.

That concludes today’s ‘how SJM fucked us all’ rant.

[pissjesus]

go on 👁👁

Ok sooooooo I wanted to keep their personalities as close to their actual characterization, obviously, but I was thinking about how they’d get to the same place from a different starting point, if that makes sense. Cuz they’d probably be treated very differently if they acted and looked the way they do but were women instead (or a boy in Noodle’s case)🙃. Unfortunately these can get kinda depressing so fair warning. And these are just my takes so 🤷 unfortunately a lot of them are based on cisheteronormativity because we live in a cisheteronormative society

Also a lot of these ideas came from smashing my last brain cells together with @plastickatz and @alicepalmersnokia

* This all started from me finding out that “Murdina” is the feminine version of the name “Murdoch,” which sounds like what Murdoc would call himself if he put on a wig drunk in his room at 5am. So I’ve been calling them Murdina, Udon, and Rose— 2D stays the same cuz she’s still got 2 dents. But some people (Murdina) call her 2A cuz she still has no boobs 😔

* 2D does modeling on the side cuz her tall, slender, androgynous appearance and pilled-out, blank stare make her a y2k alt it-girl

* Murdina finding a younger, more attractive girl to be the face of her band when she’s in her 30s and considered “ugly” seems like it’d be of greater importance. Murdoc gets to make being ugly and gross his schtick. Not that Murdina would compromise her right to replace a shower with half a bottle of “Truth or Dare” by Madonna, but she’d probably have to work harder to get fame

* She’d be constantly in the tabloids for nip-slips and ass crack, throwing her heels at the paparazzi, and her “foul” comments about eating babies. She’d also post slutty pictures online and be shaking with rage as people comment “omg body positive queen, love your bravery <3”

* 2D is already treated like he’s stupid but I think people would expect girl 2D to roll over and take a lot more bullshit— she would have flipped her lid WAYYYY earlier on

* Don’t worry Rose is still bald she just wears wigs. Hear me out but I feel like Rose would be a lot more femme than Russel (or at least more femme than he’s allowed to be). Russel prides himself on being educated, well-spoken, and fashionable, and I feel like that standard would be higher as a woman (especially being a fat black woman in the early 2000s). So I think she’d be very conscious about her image— she’d probably be everything Russel wishes he could be. However, she’d get very down on herself when she can’t reach that standard of perfectionism when she’s really depressed.

* Russel being put on a pedestal as “the only responsible caretaker” would be cranked to 1000. Though, besides Rose being an über-perfectionist, I think her and Udon’s relationship would ultimately remain unchanged. They’d still be very close even through all the lows

* Rose criticizes Murdina and 2D for their lack of hygiene and sitting with their legs spread— she puts forth that she doesn’t believe in tearing down other women but once in a while she lets it slip that she thinks they’re sluts. She’s also a repressed lesbian but she’ll figure that out eventually

* Murdina, on the other hand, has no qualms with tearing down other women and resents 2D for being considered “the pretty one” (which I fully believe Murdoc already does, but the media doesn’t pit men against each other in terms of looks quite as much, don’t they? 🙃)

* On a darker note, and this might be a hot take I guess, but I feel like Murdina’s MO would be less physical and more psychological. If Murdoc/Murdina wants to hold power over 2D, they’d have to do it in a way where people are going to turn a blind eye. It’s not that big a deal for men to push each other around and hit each other, but it’s considered more unusual for women to physically fight in public. Murdoc still tries to get in 2D’s head and Murdina would still swat her occasionally but I just think Murdina would have had decades of practice in psychological warfare

* In the same vein 2D would have to fight back in the same way. I feel like she’d give her backhanded compliments in interviews— like “I always admired that you don’t give in to the pressure to get a nose job :)”— and Murdina can only sit there fuming because she can’t throw a table.

* 2D would have very little tolerance for men because they expect/want her to go along with anything since they think she’s stupid, but she wouldn’t take it. But I also don’t think she’d be particularly clever on the fly so when some guy is trying to make her look stupid she just throws things at them (which Murdina would kinda respect)

* I also think 2D already cries easily but girl 2D cries at any provocation so not only is she whaling on you with her bony fists but she’s also crying. Category 5 white woman moment

* Udon is a weird one and I don’t have as many thoughts about him, unfortunately. Like he’s still a former child soldier, fighting his way out of hell, killing zombies in his own home, and bearing witness to psychological warfare within his band, but I guess now he doesn’t have interviewers asking him if he’s drawn anatomically correct.

* I guess interestingly, here is where Kat and I had differing opinions. Cuz I think 2D and Udon wouldn’t be as close but they don’t think their relationship would be any different, so I don’t know, I’m not dead-set on my take

* I already think Noodle has a hard time being vulnerable and I think part of it is because she takes after Murdoc in that aspect, partially because she feels like she has to prove herself as the only girl. Udon would likely be the same way but maybe for different reasons? Perhaps seeing the way Murdina gets into peoples heads would make him keep his distance, though Rose and 2D’s influence would keep him from being too cold.

* I’m sure there’d probably be “concern” that he doesn’t have a proper masculine influence in his life when he’s like 14 and wants to paint his nails but idk, when 3 disaster bachelors took in a random little girl and put her to work, no one seemed too concerned

* I can literally name like 4 different pieces of media about 3 disaster bachelors taking care of a baby but I can’t name a single story about 3 disaster women raising a kid together so that’s probably why I have a hard time thinking of what to do with Udon

* Sorry if these are kinda depressing, I do have funnier scenarios if people wanna hear them. Or darker ones if you want to peep the horror

[tmitransitioning]

How many mods are there? How many are amab and how many are afab? I'm just curious!! I feel like there's an overwhelming majority of afab related questions being answered and I was wondering if it's due to an unbalanced ratio of afab to amab mods.

there’s 11 mods.  I’ll post the bios here, since people can’t get them on mobile.  I can’t say who was assigned what at birth (most of us have only known each other about 3 months), but the bios should help answer the questions you have about lived experience.  Mod Aaron:  I’m Aaron, I’m an 18 y/o gay trans man living in the US. I’m taking an injectable progesterone hormone blocker until testosterone is financially available to me, hopefully by January of 2019.I’m also on an antidepressant for anxiety, and I have Sensory Processing DisorderMod Ferrum: 25, almost 26 nonbinary with a goal of comfortably identifying as a girl; been on oral E and Spiro since July 2014 and Finasteride since 2015. Also on antidepressants. Doctoral student in Metallurgy and corrosion who regularly melts iron.Mod Luna: Mod Luna is a 17 year old Agender cool-bean. They’ve gotten onto estrogen! H*ck yes! They’re also pretty anxious, but it could be worse. Luna isn’t sure what they wanna do for work yet, though becoming an actor sounds really fun!Mod Mayhem: 34yo trans male, nurse, on T (IM and SQ) for +5y. Multiply neurodivergent, chronically ill with several major medical conditions since childhood. I’m on hand for medical/science questions, but NOT specific patient advice that would be best handled by a professional who is familiar with you.Mod Moss: Mod Moss is a 22 year old non-binary queer who has been on oral spironolactone and estradiol for about 4 years. Mod Rabbit: Mod Rabbit is a 22 year old Jewish nonbinary queer who has been on and off injection testosterone for the past 4 years and has had a double mastectomy. They are an autistic multiple system of many brainweirds, in addition to several chronic illnesses. They are particularly interested in answering questions about the intersections of transition and disability, neurodivergence, and religion or spirituality, as well as talking about the construction of cisheteronormative gender roles in (mostly American, as that’s what they know the most about) culture. They like dinosaurs and fantasy novels.Mod Shelley: Mod Shelley is a 25 year old American trans woman who has been on estradiol and spironolactone for ~4 years. She has used pills, patches and injections to varying levels of effectiveness. Mod Shelley has social and generalized anxiety disorder, and clinical depression that are occasionally medicated with Lexapro. Mod Shelley is a semi-professional geologist and hopeful future graduate student.Mod Vega: Mod Vega is 25 year old, American, nonbinary, androgynous, and has been on and off testosterone cypionate in injectable and topical gel form for 3 years and stopped use in July 2017.Mod Wolf: Mod Wolf is a 20 year old genderqueer butch on low-dose IM testosterone since summer 2017. They have a hormonal intersex condition and hypermobile type Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, as well as a wide and colourful variety of interlacing neurodivergencies. They study narrative psychology in Canada, with a focus on how conventions of fiction shape people’s experiences with neurodivergence.Mod Zorf: Mod Zorf is a 21-year-old mtf art student. She’s on IM estradiol, formerly took spironolactone pills, and all the while has been on Prozac (until very recently). She also a radical sex-positivist, and a gender-bending weirdo. She’s up for any and all questions related to HRT, including questions about HRT’s effects on sexuality and or psychological health.Mod Caleb: Mod Caleb is 24 years old and has a complicated relationship with his gender, but for the sake of simplicity identifies as a man. He has been on T for 4 years and is 3.5 years post op for top surgery and is actively going through the process of being approved for a hysterectomy. In addition to being on antidepressants and anxiety medication, he also experiences difficulty absorbing T and has had a lot of complications with getting dosage right. He has used gel, patches, and injectable hormones.

we have an overwhelming majority of testosterone/masculine centered asks being submitted, so that’s why this blog seems to answer them more.  To balance that we’re trying to answer estrogen questions as soon as they’re asked(to put it into perspective, of the 80 asks that are still unanswered in our box, at a minimum, 70 of them are testosterone based asks- i didn’t review the 110+ in the queue, but i would guess it’s near that ratio) As when this question was last answered, we strive to answer questions from all submissions and eagerly encourage asks and submissions from nonbinary and trans women/feminine of center people.  

[lilac-written]

1, 6, 9, 11, 26, 31, 32, 34, 43, 45, 48, 50 for that ask thing

Ahhhh thanks~ I didn’t think I was gonna get any

1 : What age-group do you write?

Uhhh depends which project we’re talking about tbh. TOOD is super 100% adult based on the content itself. I’d consider Midnight Darlings to be NA. Lilium would be upper-level YA. I think TWEfA is YA?

6 : What would be the biggest compliment you could hope to receive on your current WIP?

So, it’s actually a compliment I’ve already gotten and it was in regards to TOOD. There were a couple. The first was in my PMs one day telling me that TOOD was their first exposure to queer people in fiction and they were so interested by it they did a whole bunch of research which is. Strangely humbling?

The other was related, from a different person. They thought TOOD was very important in regards to normalizing queer people in fantasy and I about cried so.

9 : What do you struggle most with as a writer?

Fuckin,,, writing. 

In reality it’s moreso like…. staying on task. And also, revising. I’m doing that with TOOD rn and it’s a nightmare.

11 : Do you base your characters off of real people? 

I… very very rarely do. The last time I did - which was the last time I have for several, several years, was I based Jayashekar Katsaros off of @junekinn partly because his name is cool and I wanted to honor him with a person as cool as his name is and partly cause June in general is a crazy-cool person and deserves a son as wild as he is.

26 : What would you like to see more of in your genre?

Less cisheteronormative bullshit. More diverse settings [as in, not Medieval Europe #156797903]. More POC leads. More women who aren’t misogynistic caricatures. More mental illness rep. More characters with trauma that doesn’t define them. More recovery arcs tbh. Um… 

I really could go on but I won’t.

31 : What trope do you actually like?

I am really fond of the gruff asshole with a softer side points at Tantirell. Also fond of the motley crew that has to learn to work together.

32 : Do you give your side-characters extensive backstories?

So… I honestly try not to and then end up doing it anyway. Katalin Basurto has quite an extensive backstory. In TWEfA I mentioned a sea witch from a country that NONE of my projects take place in and yet… I know a whole bunch about them and I just started seriously thinking about them yesterday so….

Like I said, try not to but end up doing it anyway.

34 : Describe your old writing in one word.

Ambitious.

43 : Do you tend to write protagonists like yourself or unlike yourself? 

If you mean “queer, traumatized, dealing with a Lot” then I write protagonists like myself. In all other respects, they are vastly different. 

45 : Do you find it harder or easier to write when you’re stressed out?

Depends the kinda stress. I couldn’t write for several days after my grandma died. Severe depression or… uh. Work stress, writing is a good decompressor.

48 : Would you ever co-write?

Honestly? probably not. I tried once before with an ex-girlfriend. We had a super messy breakup. Eventually what we had I turned into MD but…. yeah no I don’t really want cowriters.

Even now my partner really REALLY wants to write something with me but I’m super protective of my writing and also don’t want the same thing to happen?

50 : Would you rather be remembered for your fantastic world-building or your lifelike characters?

Is… both an option?

In all honestly, probably the worldbuilding. The worldbuilding itself is queer so like. Even if people remember it more I’m still a queer icon so.

Thanks for the ask~

[restingbritishface]

whoops all of them

1: My name? 

Adam Gabriel :) I’m not a fan of my last name though... can I have yours?

2: Do I have any nicknames? Not derivatives of my name, but you call me a lot of cute ones 

3: Zodiac sign? Aries/Taurus

4: Video game I play to chill, not to win?Skyrim lol5: Book/series I reread? Rangers Apprentice or Percy Jackson 6: Aliens or ghosts? Ghosts7: Writer I trust enough to read whatever they write? You 8: Favourite radio station? Whatever actually plays a good song?9: Favourite flavour of anything? Chocolate? Or salty10: The word that I use all the time to describe something great? Awesome or great lol11: Favourite song? Currently I kissed a boy by Jupither12: The question you ask new friends to get to know them better? I just sort of ask random questions until we have something in common lol13: Favourite word? FUCK14: The last person who hurt me, did I forgive them? Forgiving them isn’t beneficial for me and they don’t think they need it, so no.15: Last song I listened to? I kissed a boy - jupither16: TV show I always recommend? Probably Brooklyn 99 lol I haven’t seen it but I’m behind it 100%17: Pirates or ninjas? Ninja pirates!18: Movie I watch when I'm feeling down? Wonder Woman or Moana19: Song that I always start my shuffle with/wake-up song/always-on-a-loop song? My alarm always plays either i kissed a boy or from the dining table 20: Favourite video games? Probably skyrim, I don’t play too many video games21: What am I most afraid of? Losing people I love22: A good quality of mine? I’m good at giving advice23: A bad quality of mine? Probably my pickiness with food lol. That, or the fact that I always feel like I have to earn good things before I can have them24: Cats or dogs? Kitties!25: Actor/actress you trust enough to watch whatever they're in? Mmmm I don’t really have one26: Favourite season? Autumn!27: Am I in a relationship? Hell yeah!28: Something I miss? Serotonin... best thing from my childhood rip29: My best friend? You!30: Eye colour? Blue?31: Hair colour? currently blondish red32: Someone I love? You!33: Someone I trust? You!34: Someone I always think about? You!35: Am I excited about anything? You!36: My current obsession? Gay shit37: Favourite TV shows as a child? Oooh hmm I liked a lot of Disney Channel shows

38: Do I have someone of the opposite sex that I can tell everything to? I don’t care enough about people’s genitals to know who the ~opposite sex~ is, plus intersex people exist so39: Am I superstitious? A little? Not really40: What do I think about most? Youuuuu41: Do I have any strange phobias? I have fear foods, does that count42: Do I prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? I live for the spotlight43: Favourite hobbies? Dancing! Singing! Getting overwhelmed with crippling depression!44: Last book I read? Simon and the Homo Sapiens Agenda45: Last film I watched? The Greatest Showman46: Do I play any instruments? Piano and guitar47: Favourite animal? Kitties or penguins!48: Top 5 blog on Tumblr that I follow? In no particular order:       @misstheroses        @charmingimmortality          @beaniebaneenie             @hclliish​               @slenderlof

49: Superpower I wish I could have? Flying would be fucking great50: How do I destress? I love to take long baths or talk to you51: Do I like confrontation? No, but I do like to communicate, so I guess that could be seen as confrontation52: When do I feel most at peace? When I feel like I pass and I’m around people who accept me53: What makes me smile? You, kitties, babies, genuine compliments54: Do I sleep with the lights on or off? Off ofc what am I a heathen?55: Play any sports? Dance is a sport so yes

56: What is my song of the week? oooh I like so many...57: Favourite drink? Fresh orange juice probably58: When did I last send a handwritten letter to somebody? Earlier this month to youuuu59: Afraid of heights? Nope60: Pet peeve? When people order a drink and don’t tell me the fuckin size like thanks for ordering a three shot 8 pump nonfat vanilla latte with no whip, carol, now tell me what size you want before i charge you for the large

61: What was the last concert I went to see? Oh god it was so long ago i don’t even remember62: Am I vegetarian/vegan/pescatarian? I’m mostly vegetarian except when my family makes me eat meat63: What occupation did I want to do when I was younger? I wanted to be a movie star lol64: Have I ever had a friend turn enemy? Yeah haha65: What fictional universe would I like to be a part of? Oooh idk maybe middle earth?

66: Something I worry about? Accidentally pushing people away

67: Scared of the dark? nope

68: Who are my best friends? I consider @misstheroses @charmingimmortality @slenderlof and @beaniebaneenie to be some of my best friends 

69: What do I admire most about others? Their capacity for kindness even in a world that destroys it70: Can I sing? Well enough?71: Something I wish I could do? Move to london right now72: If I won the lottery, what would I do? a shit load of random acts of kindness, pay off my student loans, move to london and buy a flat, then open a queer cafe 73: Have I ever skipped school? I’ve skipped classes, but never an entire school day74: Favourite place on the planet? Wherever you are75: Where do I want to live? London76: Do I have any pets? Three cats and a doggo77: What is my current desktop picture? Wonder woman78: Early bird or night owl? Night owl for sure79: Sunsets or sunrise? Sunsets80: Can I drive? Yep81: Story behind my last kiss? Never been kissed lol82: Earphones or headphones? Earphones83: Have I ever had braces? Yep84: Story behind one of my scars? I scar super easily lol so i have a lot but when I was ~1 or so I got a cyst by my eye removed85: Favourite genre of music? Gay music86: Who is my hero? my boyfriend (it you)87: Favourite comic book character? Oooh Wonder Woman88: What makes me really angry? Assholes who purposefully fuck shit up89: Kindle or real book? I love real books90: Favourite sporty activity? Dancing91: What is one thing that isn’t taught in schools that should be? Non eurocentric history and queer inclusive sex ed92: What was my favourite subject at school? Probably English93: Siblings? I’ve got five94: What was the last thing I bought? Makeup95: How tall am I? 5′796: Can I cook? Yep it’s a lot of fun97: Can I bake? Yes yes yes98: 3 things I love? Babies, binders, and boys99: 3 things I hate? Cisheteronormativity, capitalism, and cunts100: Do I have more girl friends or boy friends? I have friend friends101: Who do I get on with better, girls or boys? Most of my friends don’t identify as only male or female so let’s just say cis boys are hard af to get on with102: Where was I born? In a hospital...?103: Sexual orientation? Gay af 104: Where do I currently live? Too fucking far away from you105: Last person I texted? You 106: Last time I cried? A little while ago? 107: Guilty pleasure? No such thing as guilty pleasures, you shouldn’t feel guilty about self-love108: Favourite Youtuber? I don’t really have one109: A photo of myself. Lmao nah110: Do I like selfies? I guess?111: Favourite game app? I don’t really have one?112: My relationship with my parents? As fucked up as capitalism haha113: Favourite accents? Oh my god I just love british accents they all sound like Tom Hiddleston oh my god so sexy114: A place I have not been but wish to visit? London115: Favourite number? 420 lmao116: Can I juggle? No haha117: Am I religious? nope118: Do I like space? yeah119: Do I like the deep ocean? scary cool120: Am I much of a daredevil? yeah tbh i can be121: Am I allergic to anything? penicillin lol and some other meds122: Can I curl my tongue? yep123: Can I wiggle my ears? no124: Do I like clowns? oh hell no125: The Beatles or Elvis? no thanks126: My current project? i’m working on nothing really currently lol127: Am I a bad loser? I can be tbh128: Do I admit when I wrong? i hate doing it but yeah129: Forest or beach? foresttttttt130: Favourite piece of advice? communicate!131: Am I a good liar? i can be if i have to but i’m terrible at lying to friends132: Hogwarts house / Divergent faction / Hunger Games district? Fairly hufflepuff, dauntless, and idk lol133: Do I talk to myself? not too much?134: Am I very social? if i know everyone i’d be hanging out with, then yes135: Do I like gossip? not really136: Do I keep a journal/diary? nope137: Have I ever hopelessly failed a test? i’ve had breakdowns for getting a b on a test so thank fuck no138: Do I believe in second chances? in certain circumstances139: If I found a wallet full of cash on the ground, what would I do? probably see if there’s any sort of id in there, but then hang around for a while to see if anyone comes looking for it. if they don’t, then i’d keep it140: Do I believe people are capable of change? to a certain extent141: Have I ever been underweight? lmao142: Am I ticklish? literally do not tickle me ever i will hurt you143: Have I ever been in a submarine? nope i’d die from claustrophobia144: Have I ever been on a plane? yep145: In a film about my life, who would I cast as myself, friends and family? oh i have no idea haha146: Have I ever been overweight? lmao147: Do I have any piercings? yeah but they closed up148: Which fictional character do I wish was real? Wonder woman149: Do I have any tattoos? not yet150: What is the best decision I have made in life so far? dating you151: Do I believe in Karma? sort of yeah152: Do I wear glasses or contacts? yep!153: What was my first car? the one i have now 154: Do I want children? i’d adopt, yeah155: Who is the most intelligent person I know? idek there’s so many types of intelligence156: My most embarrassing memory? omfg i don’t even know157: What makes me nostalgic? the smell of hairspray158: Have I ever pulled an all-nighter? yes it was not fun159: Which do I value more in others, brains or beauty? kindness160: What colour mostly dominates my wardrobe? dark colours, esp grey and red161: Have I ever had a paranormal experience? i heard a girl singing from inside my sister’s room but no one was in there, so there’s that162: What do I hate most about myself? oh boy where do I start... lol I get really dysphoric 163: What do I love most about myself? my eyes and my optimism164: Do I like adventure? hell yeah!165: Do I believe in fate? not really166: Favourite animal? kitties or penguins167: Have I ever been on radio? yeah actually i was when I was little168: Have I ever been on TV? not yet!169: How old am I? almost 20170: One of my favourite quotes? “You’re stronger than you believe”171: Do I hold grudges? yeah sometimes172: Do I trust easily? i like to think I dont’, but i trust way too easily haha173: Have I learnt from my mistakes? some of them174: Best gift I’ve ever received? love175: Do I dream? yep176: Have I ever had a night terror? yeahhhh177: Do I remember my dreams, and what is one that comes to mind? cuddling with my boyfriend in a hotel178: An experience that has made me stronger? i hate to say negative experiences made me stronger tbh i don’t know179: If I were immortal, what would I do? idk haha180: Do I like shopping? yeah but i hate spending money lmao181: If I could get away with a crime, what would I choose to do? rob a bank so i can help people182: What does “family” mean to me? people who completely love and accept you and support you183: What is my spirit animal? that’s cultural appropriation of native american culture184: How do I want to be remembered? as a kind person185: If I could master one skill, what would I choose? dance probably186: What is my greatest failure?187: What is my greatest achievement?188: Love or money? love189: Love or career? love190: If I could time travel, where and when would I want to go? i’d probably go to the past sometime191: What makes me the happiest? being myself192: What is “home” to me? wherever you are193: What motivates me?194: If I could choose my last words, what would they be? “go my son, be the biggest slut you can be”195: Would I ever want to encounter aliens? maybe if they’re nice196: A movie that scared me as a child? oooh hmm maybe terminator?197: Something I hated as a child that I like now? the gays lol198: Zombies or vampires? neither199: Live in the city or suburbs? city for sure200: Dragons or wizards? dragons201: A nightmare that has stayed with me? someone very close to me dying202: How do I define love? a deep connection to someone and a desire to support them and accept them 203: Do I judge a book by its cover? yeah i do that a lot204: Have I ever had my heart broken? yeah but i got over it real quick205: Do I like my handwriting? sort of206: Sweet or savoury? both207: Worst job I’ve had? customer service during christmas 208: Do I collect anything? memories209: Item of clothing or jewellery you’ll never see me without? probably my binder210: What is on my bucket list? travel the world, get married, be gay211: How do I handle anger? i don’t handle it well haha 212: Was I named after anyone? my birth name, yes, my real name, no213: Do I use sarcasm a lot? oh hell no I never do that214: What TV character am I most like? idk someone tell me lol215: What is the weirdest talent I have? i’m not sure?216: Favourite fictional character? Wonder Woman and any queer person in any book ever

[theblackpoets]

What Do The Idiomatic Expressions "Move On", "Live In the Moment", and "We're Progressive" Mean In Modern America?

Many of us have known and understood the objectivity of horrors that were hidden from us throughout American history: we have been subject to living under white supremacy, ableism, homophobia, transphobia, systemic racism, capitalism, patriarchy, and all other systems of oppression.

Though it is enlightening and reaffirming for us to come to an agreement of what socioeconomic, environmental problems exist and continue to permeate into our lives and our society, there are many contrarians who obviously disprove that these many systems, which oppress us, exist. And while many of them will renounce marginalized people's oppression as "millennial repining," they will contend that in order for us to coexist, we need to "ascend beyond" the calamities that have always been right in front of us.

Speaking from experience of a formerly colorblind Black man who grew up city-hopping from suburban neighborhood to the other and recognizing that systemic racism is more than one's volition to be racist, I've been learning that, within our colonized minds, there exists a maliciousness, a timidity, an unconscious subservience behind an 'individual inclination' for lunging all of our past occurrences behind us. As I was one of those people, I understood that these problems ingrained within us will never fix themselves. Systemic oppression has existed. Systemic oppression exists every day. At all times. No matter where I am.

These detrimental systems that keep us oppressed (e.g.: cisheteronormative, white supremacist, capitalist, patriarchy) have existed long before I was even born. Before delving into the main subject, I want to give a brief anecdote, which will follow into the rest of this explication. I went to a talk about a week or two ago on Black Male Feminism. The orator, David Ikard, explicated that our human behavioral psychology, is vindicated as Cultural Common Sense, when in truth, the oppressive ways in which we have been conditioned to act toward one another stem from dominant ideologies.

For example, a child talks back to their parent. The parent beats their child as an attempt to not get the child to listen, but because the parent wants to assert their dominance and maintain control as their authority figure. A woman chooses to wear a low-cut dress. She is slut-shamed for it. A 10-year old child has depression and experiences recurring suicidal ideations. Their parents invalidate the child's mental illness by suggesting that they are too young to have depression. Another example, a cisgender, heterosexual Black male is seen crying in pain. He is called gay, effeminate, and weak.

Let us critique the semantics of the idiomatic phrases that are used to very often to dismiss the dehumanizing commonplace reality we have been subjected to living in.

1. Move On - This phrase is used as a means of closure. When we humans are confronted with situations we cannot overcome, happenings we cannot avoid, or eventualities that we cannot control (because humans obviously can't control everything). We, to some degree, assert that we can only acknowledge these things and accept thing for what they are.

When the phrase could be used: Saying that we should move on from an occurrence or situation, would only make sense when we attempt to fight, for example, the inevitability of rejection and disappointment.

When the phrase is used incorrectly: The phrase, "move on," is used out of maliciousness, denial, privilege, unconscious subservience, to suggest, for example, that oppression can be overcome. For the reason people will disapprove of the actuality of my oppression by contending it can be overcome by moving on from it, is unquestionably impossible. My ancestors could not "move on" from slavery. Neither can I. I cannot "move on" from oppressive systems that condemn me to arbitrary imprisonment or unjust, immediate death.

2. Live In The Moment - This phrase, is commonly used to assert that for as long as we remain present, we are perhaps void of past occurrences, and or pain.

When the phrase could be used: We can live in the moment and enjoy ourselves if we might be earning a Bachelor's Degree in College in Neurosciences. We can live in the moment if we are hanging out with close friends at a party. We can especially live in the moment if we've created something beautiful (e.g.: A literary piece, taken a photo, a child who has been born).

When the phrase is used incorrectly: Historically, we can infer that in traditional, philosophical Buddhist thought (e.g.: Taoism) and Hinduism ideology (e.g.: Upanishads). We are urged to live life contingent on the nonexistence of our egos, which is a self that is not our self (e.g.: anatman). This has become existentially problematic for us modern-day Westerners. The meaning, semantics, and contexts of a plethora of Buddhist and Hinduism texts have been bastardized in contemporary White supremacist popular culture. This means, that a person of color, a transgender man, or a woman cannot assume their oppression has been extinguished, simply by so-called "being present."

This way of thinking buries the detriment of these oppressive systems, and will likely worry them even more if they're always coerced to "live in the moment."

3. We're Progressive - The misuse of this word is egregious. It is used to assert that because Western civilization has improved because we've had a Black man in office for eight years, and that humans have become more efficient through technological advancement.

When could it ever be said that the people of America have truly progressed as a nation?

Progression, perhaps, to the indifferent liberals, conservatives, and those apolitical might very well be referring to change industrially and sensationalizing inward change ideally.

Some people who cling to their beliefs would prefer to live life as it is now. Nevertheless, the progression which a lot of us have idealized, and many of the people we know have been fighting for us, and are fighting for us now, have yearned for a truer progression.

Progression on a revolutionary scale means change in terms of representation, politically, socioeconomically, and existentially.

There is no change when we know Mass Incarceration still exists. There is no change when the White Elite wants to build the Dakota Access Pipeline where Native Americans' lives have been endangered in trying to protect their water. There is no change when we know the Flint water crisis in Michigan hasn't been resolved for three years plus. There is no change when men haven't reacted against rape culture and patriarchy. There is no change when white supremacist elitist hegemony still plagues our schools. And there will be probably no change–no progression–until we end the victim-blaming culture and human dismissiveness among one another in this country.

If you are complicit, it is because you are privileged. You are also complicit because you are used to living within the socially constructed illusions of "civility" and "order."

Have the idioms, "moving on," "living in the moment," and "being progressive" lost their meaning? Or, have these seemingly dismissive phrases truly become a destructive way of silencing dissent–expressing fake, obligatory concern for others, invalidating the reality of one's problems–or most likely all three?

via TheOdysseyOnline: https://www.theodysseyonline.com/idiomatic-expressions-move-live-moment-progressive-modern-america