#we dont have to roleplay every stupid thing

[allramnostorage]

i hate hate HATE dm rulings that are just to punish your players for no reason, i can't wait for this campaign to be over

[solarianradiance]

John: hey karkat! John: watcha up to?

Karkat: FIRST OF ALL. Karkat: IF YOU ARE GOING TO INVADE ANOTHER. ENTITIES ABODE THAT IS HIS HIVE. Karkat: I WOULD ADVISE YOU TO AT LEAST HAVE THE COURTESY OF KNOCKING ON HIS RESPITE BLOCKS DOOR. Karkat: LEST HE RIGHTFULLY BLOW YOUR INCONSIDERATE AND EMPTY FUCKING SKULL CLEAN OFF YOUR CLEARLY INEFFECTIVE SHOULDER OUT OF BEING STARTLED BY YOUR SUDDEN APPEARANCE.

Karkat: DO YOU PEOPLE JUST NOT UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPT OF PRIVATE PERSONAL SPACE AND WHY IT'S RUDE TO JUST COME AND GO ONTO OTHER PEOPLES PROPERTY WITHOUT PERMISSION LIKE THAT? Karkat: ITS GOD DAMN BARBARIC YOU UNMANNERED JACKASS!!!

Karkat: BUT TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTION, BECAUSE I KNOW YOU WILL ASK IT AGAIN. Karkat: IM DRAWING MY HUMANSONAS.

John: your human...sonas? John: you're being a furry, but with humans?

Karkat: I AM GOING TO PRETEND I DIDNT JUST HEAR THAT AND SAVE US BOTH THE RAGE INDUCED VIOLENCE YOU ARENT WORTH THE EFFORT OF. Karkat: INSTEAD I SHALL GIVE YOU THE BREAKDOWN OF WHY I AM DOING THIS. Karkat: IT IS NOT A FURRY THING. Karkat: IT IS A THERAPY THING.

Karkat: SEE I PROMISED KANAYA ON HER WRIGGLING DAY I WOULD TRY AND MANAGE MY ANGER BETTER. Karkat: WHICH MEANT SEEING A THERAPIST. Karkat: SO BASICALLY WASTE MY TIME HASHING IT OUT WITH A DUMB BLONDE LAVENDER BIMBO THAT SHES MARRIED TO FOR A COUPLE HOURS OF HOURS EVERY WEEK. Karkat: WE WERE NOT GETTING ANYWHERE FOR THE FIRST FEW NIGHTS. Karkat: WHICH I KNEW WOULD HAPPEN BECAUSE ITS FUCKING STUPID AND SHE KNEW IT. Karkat: THEN SHE SUGGESTED THAT I USE AN AVATAR OF MY OWN MAKING TO ROLEPLAY IT OUT AS ANOTHER PERSON. Karkat: WHICH, YKNOW, IM GOOD AT. SO I VERY CALMLY SAID Karkat:"Fuck it, why not?" Karkat: SO I STARTED DRAWING THEM AS SOON AS I GOT UNSTUCK FROM THEIR HOME, JUST SO I COULD WALK THROUGH THE MIND OF A HUMAN THAT SWAPPED HIVES WITH ME.

John: that sound like something rose would suggest. John: glad you're at least trying to hold to your promise, don't see a whole lotta that these days.

John: but now i gotta ask. John: why are you drawing two of em?

Karkat: WHAT PART OF "You are being rude." DO YOU NOT COMPREHEND? Karkat: DONT JUST LOOK AT THINGS THAT ARE NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!

John: you said humansona's John: as in plural. John: you're not exactly hiding anything anyways. John: it's right there for all the world to see. John: no need to be krabby about it.

Karkat: I AM NOT BEING KRABBY! Karkat: I AM BEING PATIENT TOWARDS YOUR ASININE BEHAVIOR! Karkat: BECAUSE Karkat: I AM LITERALLY INSIDE MY OWN PRIVATE FUCKING BEDROOM YOU GASLIGHTING PIECE OF SHIT! Karkat: THAT WAS THE WHOLE POINT OF ME BEING IN HERE TO BEGIN WITH! Karkat: TO KEEP MY AFFAIRS PRIVATE! Karkat: WHICH YOU AND EVERY OTHER GOD DAMN SNOOT SERPENT BEHEMOTH OF THE SAVANNAH SEEM HELLBENT ON MAKING PUBLIC! Karkat: YOU UTTERLY INVASIVE AND ABOUT TO BE ASSBUSTED GHOST!

John: ...

John: well. John: exscuuuuse me for taking an interest in my obviously isolated friend.

Karkat: ...

Karkat: YOUVE BEEN HANGING AROUND TEREZI VRISKA AND MEENAH TOO MUCH LATELY. Karkat: TO HELL WITH IT. Karkat: HERE. Karkat: I WAS ABOUT FINISHED DRAW THEM ANYWAYS. Karkat: GAZE UPON MY THE WORKS OF MY IMAGINATION AS TO WHAT I WOULD BE LIKE IF I WAS HUMAN!

John: holy crap karkat! John: these are really good! John: i didn't know you were such a capable artist! John: i'm actually impressed.

Karkat: WELL. Karkat: THATS THE FUNNY THING. Karkat: YOU THINK YOU KNOW A PERS-

John: you said these were your humansonas? John: for therapy? John: why do you have 2? John: and why is one of them a girl?

Karkat: WHAT? Karkat: IS THAT NOT ALLOWED? Karkat: I CAN EXPLORE MY FEMININE SIDE IF I WANT.

Kanaya: In Case You Are Wondering Kanaya: I Too Made A Humansona

John: AAA!!!!!!

Kanaya: BLEEEH!!!!!!

John: KANAYA! John: how long have you been in here with us?!

Kanaya: The Whole Time! Kanaya: Did You Not Know I Was In Here?

John: NO!

Karkat: SEE?! Karkat: THIS RIGHT HERE. Karkat: THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT. Karkat: THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU KNOCK AND ASK BEFORE ENTERING ANOTHER PERSONS RESPITE BLOCK. Karkat: CUZ ITS AS RUDE AS IT IS DANGEROUS. Karkat: YOURE LUCKY IT WAS KANAYA AND I AND NOT SOMEONE LIKE EQUIUS. Karkat: WHO WOULD REFLEXIVELY PUNCH YOU INTO GORE UPON BEING STARTLED. Karkat: SO SAY IT WITH ME. Karkat: WHEN YOU ENTER ANOTHER PERSONS ABODE... Karkat: FUCKING KNOCK FIRST.

[anruraiocht]

TOA Anniversary Munday

from neffi (thank you neffi!!)

Celebrating TOA and the people who contribute to make our group what it is.

Repost, don't reblog. Only fill in what you feel comfortable sharing!

Happy anniversary, TOA! Here's to many more years spent together.

Name: limit

Pronouns: they/them

Birthday (no year): 3/8 (thats march 8th for my non-americans)

Where are you from? What is your time zone? US | EST

How long is your roleplay experience? 10+ years

How were you introduced to roleplaying as a whole? i was doing warrior cats roleplay on scratch dot mit dot edu at age 10 brother

How were you introduced to TOA? n was talking about it on call and me and the oomfs decided to play a little prank on him when he went to the bathroom. it was really funny to be fair

Do you have any pets? three dogs (australian shepherd, shiba, chihuahua mix) and a cat (stupid)

What is your favorite time of year and why? (Season, holiday, general period) fall; i have pollen allergies that give me really bad headaches and live in a pollen bowl you can imagine my suffering.

Some interests and things you like/enjoy? i like to play and draw

What non-Fire Emblem games do you play? i'm a visual novel (otome, yuri, general non-romantic) and rhythm game type of guy. jrpgs and action rpgs when i'm in the mood

Favorite Pokemon type & Pokemon: the only pokemon type that matters to me is Dog

Tell us some funfacts and trivia about yourself! i used my wisdom teeth fun fact last yeah so uhhhhh did you know i can clap one handed but only with my right hand

How did you get into Fire Emblem? i think i saw awakening in gamestop and was like yeag i'll play that. my brother and i had just finished playing virtue's last reward together so we named our robins sigma and phi

What Fire Emblem games have you played? i've at least touched every game except for 1-3 (ymmv how much that means for each game)

First & Favorite Fire Emblem games: Awakening first, FE6 or Engage for fave

List your 5 favorite Fire Emblem characters across the series! honestly just look at my muse list for this one i only write my faves

Who was the first character ever to make you go “ooh I like this one in particular” and why? Can be any context and reason! lyn was the first fe character to really get me excited about fe i was writing essays about her in n's dms while in the middle of classes haha

Any Fire Emblem crushes? 😳 i am in love with nel like /srs /gen i opened engage on my birthday so i could hear her say happy birthday to me

If you’ve played (or are familiar with) the following games, who was your first S support? Who would you S support nowadays?

Awakening: Chrom (on purpose); married Olivia in my male run. i would still choose chrom Fates: kaden and keaton for birthright and conquest respectively. i stopped playing once i had my furry daughters. LMAO. Three Houses: never got that far. dorothea and mercedes probably. Engage: i have commitment issues and this is why i dont finish games

Favorite Fire Emblem class? Dark Mage(s)

If you were a Fire Emblem character, what would be your class and stats? Would you be playable? sticking with what i said last year; a mage that just completely sucks ass. repping my special girls by also being a character that makes people say "why would you use them"

If you were a Three Houses character, what would be your affiliation? i apparently said golden deer last year. yeah sure

If you were an Officers Academy student, what would be your boons, banes and potential budding talent? Reason boon, Heavy Armor and Faith Banes, bow budding talent

If you were an Engage character, which nation would you originate from? i was gonna say elusia but then i remembered solm is partially brazil inspired and i felt my father breathing down my neck to not betray his country

How do you pronounce TOA? TOE-uh

Current TOA muses: Miranda, Marni, Reginn

Past TOA muses? Volug, Lyn, Sophia

Who was your first TOA muse? If you no longer have them, can you see yourself picking them up again? Volug; he's comfortably retired.

Do you believe you have a type of character you gravitate towards writing? the three limit muse genders are as follows:

-depersonalization and/or self-isolation (we're not the same and never will be) -my siblings are all i have (but i dont know if love is enough to save us) -oh god where does the anger go after everything is over ..............the bonus limit muse gender is "man who is funny" ftr

Do you have characters or types of characters you don’t think you can handle writing, but wish you could? i think i could do anything if i tried hard enough (hubris speaking) but i would have to become obsessed with them first which is the hard part because i feel like i'm pretty picky

What kind of scenes, situations etc do you believe you enjoy writing the most? i've really gotten back into my complicated sibling relationship era lately. i like non-traditional family relationships in general and having to work to keep that connection alive. i like relationships between women (not necessarily romantic but also yeah i'm a lesbian so romantic too) and the nuances that come with that. Honestly i like talking about gender in general HAHA

Do you have any scenario in mind for your muse(s) that gets you thinking “man I hope I get to write this one day”? just happy to be here tbh :)

Favorite TOA-related memories? my friemds :)

Present or past tense? present tense but honestly i think im really bad at tenses. LMFAO.

Normal size text, small text, no preference? normal size is my default. i'll match whatever my partner prefers

Got any potential muse delusions to share? 😉 wouldnt you like to know weatherboy

[karusenka]

Matchup for @merbear25

Thank you for chatting with me! You are such a fun person to talk to! Sorry for the long long long wait but here you go, I hope you will like it!

Law

- I know you want your beloved Caesar but Im still going to include this emo boy because I think you both would fit well, just please let me explain little bit and then we can go to your beloved wife

- I think you both would have a lot of interesting conversations about death, biology and disease! You would see a smile on his face while you both talk, he found somebody smart and interesting to have a good talk about those topics 

- He needs someone who is caring and supportive so you would be pretty good for him, Law needs some comfort so he would love to lay his head on your lap while you both watch some horror movie, you both would watch and laugh at how stupid they are

Okay okay I will go to your wife and husband and whatever because you both are meant to each other!! Just wanted to add a bit of Law cuz I think you both match but with the goat…You guys are perfect

Caesar

(I had to use this gif)

- I see your obsession with him (that's so amazing of you) and honestly… He is obsessed with you too! Oh boy the first time he saw you, let say for this sake that you were with strawhats and just wow! He wanted to take you away from those filthy people! And well, he actually did take you away from them!

- You weren't even that surprised that he wanted you...Like, just look at yourself! Who wouldn't want you? 🤭 When he got you at first you were just a guinea pig for him, he didn't want to get attached to you...but surprise! He actually got attached <3 He hated it so much but after some time he accepted it

- I think he would get touchy a lot, he wants your attention 24/7, like I said before he is OBSESSED with you so uh, good luck with that! Oh and he needs to be praised for every single thing he does. If you don’t, he will complain and be grumpy, he is so dependent on you that it hurts, he is like your puppy… Big puppy

- You both are fucking crazy together and I love it, please encourage him to do fucked up experiments on people (or on yourself, whatever floats your boat ;3) Maybe he will corrupt you even more? Or maybe you will be the one who will corrupt him? Or maybe both! 

- Like we know, he used to buy girls to have fun but when you came into his life he finally stopped buying them because you were truly the one who satisfies him the most! Those girls are nothing compared to you ;)) You both have similar kinks and likings and you both can experiment a lot with things 

- I know you have a thing for blood so I bet you both would have sex after doing some fucked up experiments on a person and you both would be covered in blood <3 Fun! Overall you both would have a lot different ideas how to make your sex better, injecting yourselves with weird stuff, forcing people to watch you both fuck, fucking in different places, maybe even some roleplay? He would be into mommy dom for sure, he likes to be step on 100% 

- I bet you both would have a lot of sex, I know you both are obsessed with each other so you want to be as close to him as possible. You both fuck like rabbits LMAO

- He would give you a lot of gifts but not normal ones ofc, gives you a lot of weird drinks that he made himself, maybe a new victim to experiment on! Or maybe a collar that he thought you would look sexy in it (he is the one wearing a collar during sex tho) oh but then he would go broke 

- At first he would want to be a dominant one, but when you both got to know each other he finds out that he wants to be dominated by you- he is the puppy in the relationship, the pathetic dog who will beg you for more and lick your shoes, Caesar will do anything for you, like I said before, please praise him and he will get obsessed with you even more (I dont think its possible to get even more obsessive but you get my idea) 

- I see him quietly hugging you behind you, he would say nothing and put his chin on your head. He is a loud guy, but sometimes he just wants to be close to you… Without talking, I know it's hard to believe but I see him like this with you. Caesar seems like a person who doesn’t care about anyone at all… Well that’s true, but when he finds a right person he actually starts to care a little bit. He says he doesn’t care if something bad will happen to you but he is lying, Caesar doesn’t want you to die, doesn’t want anything that could actually kill you or something close to happen, he doesn’t want to be alone anymore. He finds his feelings about you annoying, he wants to focus on experiments, not on a person, but as you can see, he fell in love and doesn’t want you to go… And maybe if you die somehow, he will bring you back to life no matter what, even if he has to kill thousands of people, he will do it.

[cpulysses]

I dont think I ever poster my Whipped Cream Cookie obsession here bcs at the time I would "consistently" post I was also obsessed with We Happy Few but oh my DAYS!! HES GETTING A SKIN. HES GETTING STUFF HES GETTING SO MUCH FUCKKNG STUFF IM SO EXCITED!!! So I'm infodumping all here

OK first of all were starting from the beginning. when i was born anyways when I was like 13/14 or something around that age and on a bigggg road trip with only me and my dad, I was feeling super bored. Me and my friends just finished a roleplay we had so we were speaking in a groupchat and my boyfriend mentioned trying a Cookie Run roleplay! We all joined but I was the only one who stayed, everyone left immediately because their favorites were taken.

BUT NOT MINE!!! I really liked Whipped Cream Cookie, when I picked up the game again after a really long time I just looked at him and decided yeah that one and oh my god why did that like change the trajectory of my life. He wasnt taken and I knew jack shit about his lore, but I picked him up and later on Cyborg Cookie too

I wasn't... heh... known for my whipped cream..! 🤓! But I still really liked him, people liked how I wrote his dialogue, but I was cooking so well with Cyborg Cookie that theg were the main focus really, eventually I decided to connect the twos lore for fun! I knew like all of Cyborgs lore except for stuff with the future skins really, so I just interwove Whipped Cream as someone related to their past in a way where Cyborg makes that stupid pink egg Whipped Cream has, and Whipped Cream just kinda found it and was like this is FIRE! and Cyborg was like noooe :( Thats basically it shortly put but I had a lot of fun roleplaying the two and found my best friend ever while in that server and now were big and grown and :3!!!

But yeah, I basically ONLY have good memories with the character. I continued to grow to like HIM, when the server was sadly deleted I ocified him and Cyborg alongside other cookies, with my friend also taking them in as ocs as well. And I grew more attached to my ocified Cyborg cookie due to how different they were to the base, but my ocified Whipped Cream Cookie could never fucking take the wheel. I love him sure but canon Whipped Cream just always had a special spot for me, my friends literally told me they've never seen someone so infatuated with a character while barely posting about it online or anything (now here i am) or just in general so captured by a character, he was like my fucking mascot to my friends, they'd see ANYTHING with him in it and send it to me, to the point where I wouldn't be shocked if I've seen almost every fanmade and canon Whipped Cream cookie thing like in the world

And for part of that massive fixation I knew jack shit abt what lore he actually had 😭 I knew small things and then again all he really had was small things, but I didn't know all of it. Then randomly on his wiki page I was doomscrolling and found a link to an article all about him! Not an article just a long google doc, but thats where I learnt a bunch and could look into the Dessert Paradise and all the characters to know how each connect and know more about him and I was very joyous,,, I was content for SO LONG. Just knowing he was a fellow brownskin who loves ballet and pink, with my little headcanons. Now I knew real shit I felt like the man.

And now me, one of my friends, and my boyfriend are all ocifying some of the Dessert Paradise cookies that we see as family ^^ So like Sugar Swan, Wind Archer, Fig Cookie etc etc. I wish I knew who made that Whipped Cream Cookie document but if your out there just know you changed the trajectory of my autism for life. I won't say more I'm already rambling so much, but I love Whipped Cream with all my heart and this update has me so so excited because I've had dreams of being on my fuckjng death bed with one wish and wishing for an update about him. Its bad.

BUT!! I will draw him and my ocified version more to post here and on Twitter even if nobody gaf bcs i gaf. I love him so dearly I've grown with hum through time the span of like 4-5 years just because I randomly pointed to him and went that one!! And moved on. I could legit die happy now. Like my life is over this is my peak. My peak.

[msj4d3m4rv3l]

Vent about mamamax ↓

I'm sorry, but this mamamax nonsense is so stupid. I don't even want to get into what he's saying rn, I'm way too fucking tired. When I first started watching his vids I was like damn this is cool, he's actually bringing pedos to justice.

Then my friend reminded me of how crazily edited the videos are, and I thought: wait, now that I think about it, mamamax just seems like he wants to put up this vigilante persona about himself.

Like, the editing? The batman voice? The miami hotline clips? The music? It seems more like one of those Netflix true crime "docuseries" than an actual video portraying him trying to do good. Also, apparently ALL his exes said he was abusive? That's just crazy honestly

Also he's trying to bring every other popular YouTuber into it, like for example penguin0z, it's so fucking weird. It seems to me mamamax just wants to be seen as this batman vigilante pedophile hunter that brings people to justice because he wants to be seen as cool or whatever (if you know what I mean). Like, seriously dude? Why would you call a popular YouTuber bad because they don't want to talk about pedophiles for ten minutes or whatever (can't remember what he wanted them to do though, sorry I'm not well-versed in mamamax drama).

Also, his videos seem kind of faked. Remember that video about the Japanese cult? And remember when mamamax got that discord message (that was asahara backwards; come on now man. Cults aren't that stupid. They wouldn't put their names backwards that just sounds fake) threatening him? How do we know it's not just an alt of his or something? There's more info about some content being fake here ↓

But yeah. I don't know. Because I was an SA and grooming victim I was entranced by the videos of him hurting pedophiles and catching pedos

(yes I believe he did actually catch pedos but it's so dramatized I dont know how to feel. It feels disrespectful to paint himself as this vigilante while catching pedos. Why do you have to do that? Why do you have to paint an image about yourself? Can't you just be a normal person instead of roleplaying as Chris Hansen why can't you be a normal guy catching these pedos? Idk I'm getting a bad vibe from it)

But now with the GOD CULT thing it's just going way too overboard. I'm too tired to deal with it, and now mamamax just seems like he wants to the YouTuber Batman version of Chris hansen.

Sorry for the fucking essay I wrote, I just had to vent. I feel kind of stupid for falling for this stupid fucking persona he made for himself.

Yes. I know he's reported the pedos to the police, and I know the police arent listening. But idk. His content and his behavior is fucking weird.

TDLR; I don't really trust mamamax because of the stupid god cult thing and his persona he made for himself. Also, his content seems kind of questionable and his character also seems questionable.

[angeltiique]

OH MY GOD.

i just realised.

this is my blog.

i can do whatever i want.

so heres a giant fucking ramble with as many thoughts on Shenggou Ye as i can manage (who if you dont know is an oc belonging to my wonderful best friend reese aka rai aka rai.diate and her story universe Liar Liar Chaos Fire 😁 she doesnt know im doing this, this is for me):

if you dont know how did you NOT know shenggou ye accidentally became a biiiiiiit of a hyperfixation for me (exaggerating). reese and i can't exactly pinpoint when it started but we think its around the time we started a zombie apocolypse roleplay with us two and another friend <3

i love him so much i daydream and fantasise about him every moment i get. i see the colour red, or a wild dog or hyena, something to do with kung fu, or any obscure thing that i manage to tie him to and i go absolutely FERAL. hyenas are now my favourite animal because of him. i see a ricecooker and laugh at how he loves rice because his asian ass is so goofy (just like me fr). i love the colours red and teal which are his main colours. my favourite songs are loose cannon by set it off and mama by mcr which are his songs. he is TAKING OVER MY LIFE /POS

i feel bad that i dont get like this with other characters, especially my other friends and even my OWN, but thats just what ended up happening and i cannot seem to control myself lol

i even made up a list of why i kin him do you want to see it well too bad youre seeing it anyway i told you this is a megapost megalist mega fuckfest okay not a fuckfest but you get the idea:

SHENGGOU KIN MOMENTS:

- large hearts, both literally and metaphorically

- imposter syndrome (self-doubt, feeling like a fraud/liar)

- scared of being disowned/losing loved ones

- making jokes during serious moments (struggling to cope so makes light of the situation = ends up brushing it off/ignoring it)

- loving our best friend from high school fr fr /gen /pl and being so excited when we see them <3

- saying fucky ass and baybee (im the reason he says it LMAOOO)

- gayass motherfuckers (both bi)

- WE BOTH HAVE PUSSIES LMAOOOO and we aren't really dysphoric about it hell yeah (im trans and sheng is intersex 💪)

- lying lying chaos crying (i know a lot of them lie but shhhhhh)

- not being good at voice regulation/shutting the fuck up LMAO (apparently its a sign of autism... shenggou ye autism real!!? /j)

- having silly laughs <3 idk my mama makes fun of my laughs and he has a silly laugh it counts sshhhh

- he probably sits on surfaces weirdly or on places you wouldn't normally sit on, and i sit weirdly so YEAH

- sex jokes? yes please (they are funny !!!)

- dramatic as hell but its because we are silly goofy

- annoying as fuck but its slash pos

and thats all i had but theres probably more in fact im doing things because he does them, like saying "L" LMAOO BUT i mean it in an endearing way 🫶

ive also been calling my mother mama a LOT more like thats WHAT ive been calling her exclusively and i know for a fact its because shenggou calls HIS MOTHER mama and the song mama by mcr again. tsk tsk this hyperfixation is legit taking over. but i love it so much.

hes all i want to daydream about. we (friends and i) have a running joke that he is my husband, i love calling him my dearest darling husband shenggou ye. its great. but i like thinking about him with me during the day, maybe doing something stupid or dangerous and laughing at him, him helping me calm tf down when im stressed. its a weird coping mechanism but strangely effective!! i prefer keeping to myself but thinking about him with me makes me feel more seen and heard and loved. and reese is a bit like him, so its also like having my best friend with me even if shes not really. i like to think i can tell shenggou anything because thats how i feel about her. again, its all really stupid and cringe but its really nice and fun

im only now realising this is probably just turning a friends oc into a para. or like. something like a para. i mean the daydreams do get vivid.. Huh!

anyway thats about all i feel like sharing, i dont expect anyone to see this like all my other posts, i just enjoy screaming into the void and seeing if anyone screams back. let it be known, having weird coping mechanisms is cool and youre so.valid. /gen biggest hugest thank you to my bestie reese for creating this goober i am obsessed with. without her art that captures his handsomeness and her writing that demonstrates his personality i would never have fallen so deeply in love with him to the point of delusion.

Now if you'll Excuse me. i am going to dream the Best dreams (shenggou will be in it). thank you and Goodnight ^_^

[qsmp-slime]

hi hi hi. *smacks you with my paw* hi. hiiiiii

tell me about your blorbo

HIIIHIIHIHIHIHIHIHIHI SMACKS U HI. HELLO. HI !!!! oKAY. okay. OKAY. sSO.

i am going to preface here and point out that the creator that this series largely came from (v.enturiantale / jordan frye) KINDA SUCKS!!!!! and when we were still massively in the fandom last when this all came out, general consensus was/still is "fuck it we're stealing the characters" so this is like slightly actual old canon, and then half generall fanon stuff / half our own personal thoughts

THE GENERAL OLD CANON STUFF. spencers a nerdyass kid who used to be a god (i think that was still a thing towards the end but whatever) and hes obsessed with world of warcraft and star trek and that mfer is SO autism coded im sorry. also theres a lot of dark shit related to the family he lived with but im NOT !!!!!! getting into that sorry lol

BUT OKAY. okay. so like. i think if the stuff was still going hed be in his 20s??? by now?? we say ~21-22. boy can legally drink omg. BUT UH!! he is an EX-GOD he is stuck in a human body. he is pale as fuck and has red hair and he looks Grimey he has every disease known to man. he has rusty braces (this was actual literal canon) and one of the harshest lisps you could imagine.

he talks like a 13 year old roleplaying on quotev. he absolutely hates nintendo and i cant actually remember the reason why but he did. he can quote tiny bits from star trek episodes from memory and does so constantly, and either forgets that people dont have this same level of knowledge or just thinks ur stupid for not knowing.

hes the most INSUFFERABLE little shit i have ever heard of we actually used to find him annoying as FUCK when we were ac hild but he very quickly became Our Boy.

also he is trans and bi-ace because i say so <33

[pespillo]

man.  

you know what , yeah , ive been a major jackass for gd knows what long, i am bossy, i am annoying at times, i tend to take the wheel umprompted , i think I Know SOOOO much even when really im throwing stuff at the wall seeing what sticks best, i hype myself up because i legitimately feel like i need to do it , maybe im overcompensating a lot, i know i can make people feel Bad when i talk to them and criticize them , i think you all got all the right to criticize me when its due, i Should Drop Shit faster when some things turns out to be bad and not just hold the hot coal 6 months after the fact because my head tells me “there may be a chance things do an upturn right? maybe theres some inner company logistics i dont know about” n wait around like a fucking dog, barking but not biting . I Should have bitten. Maybe i should have been a kinder person sometimes , maybe i should have been a meaner person other times . And if i ever made you feel bad over something small, i Am sorry, i mean it, you deserved better.

but when i tell you all you dont know even half of me i really mean it, you guys dont know the fucking shit ive been through the past 5 years dealing with family and unemployment , i know it seems like i fucking got it alll together , that because i draw well enough to gain a measly income every month , im just living la vida loca and building this hugeee ego about my persona online , You dont fucking know me , and if you do? lemme tell you, i got dumped out from a newish group because apparently they couldnt Ever Tell me that i was a bit too bossy when roleplaying for a stupid fucking arg , they just decided to all block me and ghost me , PRETENDING to be all like “no no we wouldnt ever just cut people off like that lol” , i tried acting like i was gonna be fine, but i felt worthless and abandoned for a good ass month or two , like i did something  so awful that it was just better to dump me off like that without any answers or closure , turns out , it was just some petty rp bullshit because how dare i tell someone that their writing can be a bit Much i guess. and you know what ? after i learned that this month, im done being a spineless doormat , i realized just by this stupid drama, i WAS being a doormat to cawthon , i was treating this franchise like it was a real “friend” just because im horribly mentally ill about it and let it overtake me in my late teens, and since it was sooo hard to dump a “friend” i just felt like i JUST couldnt do it full on. thats so fucking dumb isnt it?

listen i have no fucking idea where some of you get the idea that i am some kind of , harasser or some shit like, fine , if you build this idea of me in your head because you think i receive too many compliments (its not like im asking for them , i am not gonna reject Kindness) sure whatever, but i dont waste my fucking time sending anons or calling out random people for nothing, literally i just sit here having to witness vile shit out in the public from people who are legit unapologetic and then putting out a post or two saying “hey what the fuck is wrong with these people please dont expose vulnerable people to the gross shit you put out for sexual gratification”. When do i ever act like im hot shit? i feel like a fucking wimp every day of my life, i feel like im a fragile bitch about everything , like i walk around and feel like i wanna cry but im supposed to suck it alllll up because im a grown ass man now and i need to keep people i care about safe , at all costs, even if most of the time i really wanna say “i wanna kill myself” .  

ive said this before, but i am not gonna lay my guts in the sun for strangers to gawk and look at me , not anymore. this is the LAST time i am laying down my problems like this , if you want to seriously talk to me. do it , do it because i literally dont care about blocking random people , i am not gonna fucking block any of you unless you legitimately want me to or , actively try harassing me or harm me or others . And i have good faith in so many people, you should feel good about yourself for having guts to tell it like it is.

anyways, i wish everyone a happy new year´s eve or just , a happy new year, keep yourselves safe and have a good time 

[mikaze-discord]

OG Heavens: Love letters

For these Heavens posts, I had reached out to a few people who just never ended up responding. With projects like these, please at least hear them out, you don't have to do it because I know its a huge project but at least tell them you won't be doing it instead of ghosting them. But apart from that little road block, this project was really fun!!

Please enjoy under the cut!!!!

EIICHI OTORI

From @milkmateartist:

I have always leaned towards megane characters and Eiichi is no exception. However, it's not often you see idols wearing glasses, and that is something I appreciate about Eiichi's design. His color palette also intrigues me since I love deep shades of blue. His royal blue jacket is very attractive, and the way he pops the collar also makes me go "kya!".  His voice is also very sexy as well and is pleasing to the ear uwu. I love how egoistic he is too. Being incredibly ambitious he has been able to reach amazing heights that surpass other idols. The one thing that seems to make him unique though is that he really gets zealous and overly passionate when it comes to the power of music, so much that it makes him physically tremble. You could get high off that shit literally. His entire being is centered around being an idol, and all the components of him go above and beyond the requirements. It's not just a job for him or something that simply makes an earning or brings satisfaction. It's pretty much everything to him. For that reason he has made it to the top. There is also the component where he's lonely and isolated emotionally that interests me. Despite being a beloved idol, he clearly didn't get the love he needed growing up. Even though he had Eiji I feel as though his nature was more to protect Eiji and shield him from whatever terrors would arise. I admire his ability to come through all of that and pay attention to the things he really cared about. Eiichi can be himself, his strange, sexy self, but also he acknowledges the lonesome darkness within too. I think that component makes him incredibly powerful.

Extra Details:

While appearing to be a bad guy in the anime (at least), Eiichi seemed to be that typical bad boy idol that would steal away Haruka from the main group. The time when he approached Haruka and took her by the chin is a perfect example. How dare this new guy just think he can have his way with our protagonist!  To be honest I liked that aspect about him a bit. While I can't remember my first impression of Eiichi aside from not knowing how to feel about that, he slowly grew on me. He had the appearance of just another selfish idol, demonstrated by swiping the mic away from the announcer at one of his concerts and immediately declaring their foreseen victory. So far that looked rather bland to me, and I was still cheering for STARISH. They really made him out to look like some bad guy who would not play fair and do whatever he could to take the throne (and the girl).  It's not surprising his glasses shine adds to his 'freaky antagonist' vibe that the show seemed to try to give off, but however for me I love the glasses beam, thus having the opposite effect.

And then there is the Next Door episode. Now here's where we got to see more of Eiichi aside from when the HEAVENS Dragon demolished the entire stadium. Aside from kya-ing over the EiichiOtoya content (especially where he goes behind otoya and covers his eyes), I got to see more of him here. It surprised me that someone so cocky and confident was actually the same depressed, lonely person that Otoya was. But it was also evident to me as well that he did care about the effect it had on Otoya as well after he sort-of-well mind broke him. I like how he is ambitious but also still caring, as compared to an antagonist that would stop at nothing to achieve their goal regardless of how much pain they cause.

I also enjoy Eiichi because I feel like I can roleplay him well. Usually for me, roleplay has to achieve some kind of goal since I tend to be business oriented. I think to some degree I'm able to practice being a eboy idol through Eiichi, as I do enjoy charming the fans. It also helps that I can naturally play characters with an inflated ego who enjoy charming people.

From @/egoisticCEO on twt:

July 2019. When Eiichi was first introduced to me via his voice, I hated him from the very beginning. His singing, his appearance, his personality – everything about him made me despise him. It’s funny looking back and seeing how quickly my attitude changed towards him, realising I’d been biased against him because of a friend. Finding more about him, hate turned to interest. It seemed like his life hadn’t been the best. Maybe that was why he acted in such a way? Interest turned to liking him more. Maybe I’d misunderstood him. I’d made the mistake of taking him at surface level.

December 2019. Like was slowly turning to love. More and more, I found myself looking at him instead of my current favourites. I found myself wanting him to actually be a part of Egoistic. Once I started devouring HEAVENS Radio and unveiling his true character, it was shocking how quickly I fell. He truly acted like a father to everyone in his band. Giving them what he never received. Everything was for them to thrive.

2020. With how much I was at home, it only made sense I grew more obsessed. I found Life with Thanks’ translation. “We’re irreplaceable to him,” he tells us, and that made me certain that his heart wasn’t as evil as some people liked to believe. He’s a caretaker, someone who wants everyone to feel like they matter. Even at his own expense. Instead of selfish, he’s selfless.

I related to him more than I have to any character – it was comforting. Seeing someone have no choice but to put on a brave face, even when his confidence was at an all time low. 2020 got a lot harder for me, but when I recovered, Eiichi was like a home to go back to. Time and time again, I’d have to break away, but I’d always be invited back in by that stupid smirk and overexaggerated ego and the warmest heart you could ever find. Every scene I watched with him would make me smile. I’d tease him to myself. I still do.

2021. That brings us to now. I can’t see my love for this one of a kind man dying any time soon. I don’t want it to, either. Just looking at him makes me happy! He’s the type of character with so many facets to his personality that you can keep digging and never reach the end. So, in conclusion, I hope I never stop finding new things out about this wonderful idiot. More than anything, he deserves all the love he gives to others, and I’d love to provide it tenfold.

KIRA SUMERAGI

From Anon: 

Many have their reasons to love their favorite characters. As for me, why Kira Sumeragi is my favorite character is because there are several things about him that I can relate myself to and there are a few qualities he has that I like about him. If many do not know about Kira that much, they’d look at who he is. He may look intimidating at first and may not talk much, when in actuality, Kira is a considerate, dependable, and mindful guy. Mainly, he is the type of guy that lets his actions do the explaining. He is a hard worker, as an idol, he looks after his bandmates, HEAVENS, like family. It’s like what Eiichi said in HEAVENS Radio about Kira, “he is HEAVENS’ pride!” Although he may not say much, Kira is very observant of his surroundings and never hesitates in his decisions. The members of HEAVENS understand and acknowledge Kira, knowing that he means well.

You can even tell in his solo music! Although there are only two solo songs for Kira, if you read the lyrics carefully, Kira’s thoughts and feelings are shown. Kira always knew that if he cannot explain his feelings through words, then he’ll let his songs and his actions do it for him for you to see.  Although the anime doesn’t show much of Kira, the only way to get to know him more is through HEAVENS Radio, also drama CDs like Paradise Lost, and other media like LINE Messenger Japan. There’s still much that I’d want to know about him, but as a start, these things are what makes Kira my favorite character for HEAVENS.

From Anon: 

Aside from my huge bias towards OnoD the first thing that drew my attention to Kira was his design. Dark haired anime boys with bright eyes have such a vibe and I loved how mysterious he was set up to be in season 2. But the thing that really hooked me a lot was the found family that Heavens became over the progression of the anime.

Particularly since people in the fandom have a bunch of funky headcanons about Kira being the mom friend in the group, which is incredibly wholesome. Kira’s very quiet and reserved but clearly holds a deep caring for his group members and does what he can when needed which is one of the reasons why he became so loveable for me.

NAGI MIKADO

From @/_PXRFECTIONIST on twt: 

If I managed to stan Nagi, so will you.

Greetings. I present to you, once more, a story of how I came to love a character that I wished I threw hands with.

So.

Nagi Mikado.

The possible only utapri character that Shinomiya oshis despise. Thanks to what happened in the anime.

Truth be told, I too was one of them. Until I came to love Both Shinomiya and Nagi. Reason?

Research.

Ya see, it is universally agreed upon that the way Nagi was pushing and pulling at Shinomiya's trauma and DID was… Not okay. So I said "yeah okay what an obnoxious kid i dont think ill ever like him lol" especially since I never come to really warm up to people younger than me.

Boy was I wrong.

My heart really sways easily when I go deep into characters, and why they act the way they are. And also because I chose to roleplay as him, but let's not. Speak of that.

(its actually the main reason i like him in the first place who am i fooling)

Nagi is… Indeed obnoxious, and really has bad manners that are covered up by his cute looks and fame, especially since he's one of the original HEAVENS members, but once you get to really know him.. It makes sense why he's being such a brat. And that is sort of endearing. And knowing how his group is like family to him too, it becomes harder and harder to completely dislike him.

….

He really is a boss man.

He knows what he wants, and how to get it. He knows how to get people to like him without handing over the tiniest sliver of his weaknesses. He acts in his own way that shapes his personality to suit him, yet still manages to be caring and helpful, even if it's hard to see tenderness and good will through his aggression.

Reading his solo lyrics, listening to the drama CDs, even thinking of headcanons due to lack of lore, it all slowly comes together like a lovely parfait to suddenly make you realize..

'Wow…'

'I really do like that rat.

[maybe-your-left]

Kylo doesn't like wearing the skirt? Imagine if he does wear one, you could see his third leg just swinging around.

kylo does NOT like the skirt.

———

“Hey,” you cooed. Running your finger across Kylos broad back from behind the couch. You leaned over the lip, giving him your best puppy eyes, “What if we did something new?”

“What do you mean,” he mumbled through a mouthful of cereal. Kylo didn’t even turn to look at you, staring directly at the screen. History channel was on, its more important than you. You traced your finger up to his ear, brushing his long hair back to expose it. Kylo shuddered as you traced it, giving you a sideways glare before taking another bite of his precious meal.

“I just wanna try some stuff with you...”

“What kind of stuff? We already do enough.”

“Like in the bedroom,” you leaned further, almost flopping into the couch in the process. “I wanna try something new.”

Kylo snorted, “I’ve already fucked all your holes, unless you want me to try and burst your eardrum there’s nothing new to work in.”

“Okay gross,” you sighed, “I was thinking some roleplay.”

“Oh.”

You had his attention now, you climbed over the lip. Perching next to him on your heels and puffing your bottom lip out. Being sure to press your breasts together so he was nice and buttered up. “I wanted to do like a school girl role play.”

“School girl?”

You nodded.

“Angel, we haven’t been in school in like 7 years. I’m almost 30.”

You groaned, slumping into his lap dramatically. Smushing your face into the cushion on the other side of his thigh, “That’s why it’s a role playyyyy.”

Kylo smacked the back of your thigh, “Dont fuckin’ whine. What would it even be? You getting a fucked for an A?”

“Not exactly...”

“You didn’t even get As in college.”

———

Three nights later you executed your plan, laying out a school girl uniform on the bed. Along with various toys, you were wearing a black lingerie set. Looking extra tantalizing for his royal jackass to come see you.

“I’m home,” you heard him holler from the kitchen, you perked up right away. Vibrating from excitement as you waited. Soon he strode through the door, dead in his tracks when he saw you.

“What’s this?” He asked, his eyes dancing across your skin and finally settling on the outfit. He scrunched his forehead, “Arent you supposed to have that on?”

You shook your head, your smile wide across your face.

“Well,” Kylo kept staring at it, “Whose it for then? This isn’t like a threeway thing again, right? Because last time you picked the girl and she didn’t stop calling me for a month.”

“It’s for you.”

Just when you thought he was froze before, he somehow became even stiffer. His smirk falling into a deep frown as he back away from the bed. “Why would I wear that,” he stuttered.

You crawled to the edge of the bed, grasping his collar before he could run away. Bringing him close to your face as you whispered, “Because I’m going to fuck your pretty little ass.”

Kylo visibly gulped, “Are you serious?”

You nodded your head, placing a plush kiss before you whispered again, “Since you’ve been such a slut, needing to get your grades up by fucking your teacher.”

“Oh my god, your fucking serious right now.”

“Get your outfit on,” you pushed him away, “Dont keep me waiting.”

———

“This thing is uncomfortable,” Kylo whined from the bathroom, he had been in there for 10 minutes. You weren’t sure if he spent it cleaning himself or trying to break out through the window, but you were done waiting.

“Come out here or I’m giving you an F!”

“I thought you were giving me a D!”

“Just for that,” you sneered through the door, “I’m not going gentle!”

Kylo finally emerged, face beet red and scrunched in embarrassment. You were so excited, it was so snug on him. Caressing his muscles, every dip and bulge of his skin, right down to his cock. Which was harder than you expected, peaking out from under the pleating.

You placed your palms on his cheeks, sloppy kisses against his mouth. Kylo hummed into you, the tension from before melting away as he wrapped his large hands around your waist. His fingers digging into your skin as your tongues danced. You grinded into him, causing him to hiss as you squeezed his cock between the two of you. “This better be worth it,” he growled into your mouth. Lifting you from the floor and walking the two of you to the bed.

Kylo slotted between your legs, pushing your open with a palm behind each knee. He stared down at your pussy, glistening and bare. Lips parting as he spread your legs more. Kylo gathered some spit, letting it fall on your clit before he rocked his cock against you. The skirt pulled back enough for him to coat him in your juices.

“Baby,” you whined, “I’m supposed to be fucking you.”

Kylo shook his head, “Not yet, professor, I need to be sure your good enough to fuck my ass.”

His hand dropped your leg, popping the tip inside you. You moaned at the stretch, even after all these years together. He still split you, stretching and pushing you apart to make room for his monster cock. Kylo grunted as he sunk inside you, a loud squelch when he was flush with your hips.

“Am I good enough?”

He nodded silently, sucking in a breathe through his teeth before pounding into you. Anchoring himself over you, his stupid skirt covering the image of his cock ripping you.

“You like getting fucked by me?” he growled, “In this stupid outfit?”

You dug your nails into his shoulders, pulling him down to your face. “It’s a mandatory uniform you filthy slut.”

Kylo growled again, slamming harder and harder into you. He latched his mouth to your neck, sucking a deep purple welt. “Everyone’s gonna know you let one of your students fuck you, you’re going to get fired.”

You grabbed his face between your thumb and forefinger, just the way he does to you, “Do you want the whole class to know I fucked you?” Kylo froze, trying to work his jaw close from your steel grip. You brought his real close, “Get on your fucking hands and knees, you need to earn your grade.”

Shockingly enough, Kylo obeyed without a word. The slight whine from his throat was all you heard when he pulled out. Centering himself on the bed and bending over, you smiled when you saw him. His firm, pale ass up in the air for you.

And nestled inside in was a plug, just for you to take out.

You brought a finger to it, taping the base experimentally. “Look at you,” you mused, giving a light tug to it, Kylo shuddered underneath you. Nuzzling his face into the duvet, he let out a lewd moan. “Fuck Angel,” he whimpered, spreading his legs a little wider for you. Even arching his back so you would reward him with more touches.

“Are you eager to get fucked?”

Kylo nodded, “I’m eager to get this skirt off, now fuck me.”

You scowled at it him.

“Please,” he whimpered.

You reached to your side, grabbing the strap to nestle inside you. Being sure to place the base right over your aching clit, you then squirted copious amounts of lube on the length. Fucking yourself with a fist while you tugged at the plug. Kylo groaned beneath you as the largest part pulled out. Exhaling hotly once it was free, you wasted no time bringing the tip to him. Thrusting your hips slowly, you scratched your nails up his thighs. Digging them into his skin just the way he likes.

“Okay Ky?”

He nodded into the blankets, “Mhm, please move. I’m going to fucking cum if you don’t do something.”

You smiled, snapping your hips into him. Both of you groaning out from the double sided toy. You saw one of Kylos arms fold under his chest, tugging at his weeping cock. Still slick from your pussy, you canted into him. A symphony of smacks, moans, and cries as you fucked him.

Kylo cried out, “Fucking fuck! Cumming... I’m fucking cumming!” His body seized below you, followed by more choking sobs as he sat up on his hands and sank back into you. His cock spurting cum all over the covers, pooling between his legs as he trembled.

You softly pushed into him, trying to move him off so you could get out. Kylo took the hint, wincing as you pulled away. Quickly standing from the bed to grab towels and water for him.

When you came back he was still panting, laying in a u-shape around his mess. A weak had stretched out to grab the bottle, chugging the entirety in one move.

“I’m never wearing the skirt again.”

———

i’m hot and HARD.

TAGGING: @finn-ray-nal-beads @caillea @roanniom @contesa-lui-alucard @historyandfandoms50 @relationshipwithmybed @emeraldsiren20 @shesakillerkween @jynz-andtonic

[tomatograter]

Do you have any tips on starting fics? Like thinking of idea's, getting motivation, and thinking up plots and themes?

Think of things you want to read about! The litmus test of anything writing-related to me is if i think it is compelling for myself. Trying to appeal to an outside audience can be very discouraging and counterproductive to getting words out.

I realize not everyone thinks like this, but i believe fics should be no different than other kinds of fiction, so; try to think of a Genre for your story while you're brainstorming it. This could flatten the process. It doesn't have to be set in stone, but ideally, placing what you intend to write as an "action" "adventure" "horror" "western" "dissertation" "comedy" "scifi" "missing scenes" etc etc story can be helpful to develop an atmosphere, further ideas, define what kinds of devices are to be employed and such.

Specially when it comes to fanfic and dealing with prewritten characters (see: dming for tabletop roleplaying games), i also think it is useful to write a story that challenges your characters. Not "i have a setting. I guess the characters will kick it up somehooooooow?". Make it tailor made. Character is afraid of snakes? Throw a fucking naja at them. This is a critical moment, what happens? Whos affected? Why should we care? What are the consequences? That gets your brain running. "Character is very invested in (X)" ok, now crush it. Same questions as before, why should we care? Can you pierce it back together? So on and so forth.

When you're cobbling it together, think of what kinds of situations could make a good contrast to their personality, troubles, weaknesses and a little bit of their strengths. (Balance it out.) It keeps things more engaging and interesting if your character is walking towards something, rather than being limblessly pushed by a series of events.

Being acquainted with the characters you're writing, their ticks, interests and embarassing traits is very helpful here. Play to their tune.

Dont let your scenes be an afterthought. You'll still have to write them after all!!! Not every scene has to be a showstopper, but if you find yourself writing large swatches of text whose only purpose is filling up space and not doing much tonally, emotionally, or character-wise, what is the point? Write things you want to read about. Think of the minutiae. 'How is this meeting/development/conflict different from others ive seen? Is it funnier? Is it unexpected? Is it cute? Is it embarassing - how can i make it evoke something like these traits?'

Write to your/your audience's level. Purple prose is cool, but are you comfortable with it? Does the story call for it? Are you sure you aren't more comfortable with other structures? Homestuck fanfic is neat because it's the fandom where I've seen the most entertaining works utilizing second person, and they can really rock.

Be indulgent. Don't be afraid to be stupid. This is self-explanatory. Keep a little document with all your ideas and dumb thoughts, no matter how messy they are. You'll eventually thank yourself for writing them down and not losing them later. Who cares if you want to write a fairy themed romance set in space? Wait, thats homest

Read other fanfics, sure, but read things that aren't fanfic. A lot of fanworks follow molds that may not be the best to replicate in your own writing. (Remember the "genre" bit from above? This is also helpful here, because then you know what to look for.) Hell, you don't even have to settle down to read all 600 pages of a book. Read opening statements from different authors. Compare and contrast first chapters. Find out what you like and what you dislike re: writing and try to replicate it in the lab. Do you have a story hook? Do these authors have a story hook that made you want to keep reading? How was that applied?

You're not going to write the fucking Mona Lisa on the first draft. Get that concept into your head, make peace with it, there, now you're friends. First drafts suck ass.

First drafts should suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck big smelly turds.

You're not doing it wrong. Try not to be discouraged! Instead, take it as a chance to read over your story and figure out what is not working. Write it again, with improvements. Personally i can't write anything straight through and i know very little people who can without having planned it beforehand - thats another keyword. Loosely planning scenes and a sequence of events showing how things happen is good even if you're improvising most of it, it gives you direction. Even better, sometimes it can help you visualize entire chapters or stories before punching them out. Even better! Crossing out the little blurbs of scenes you've completed and seeing how many are left to go can keep you motivated to finish the whole thing.

Writing is a laborious process, you dont need to make it more mystifying. Most of the magic comes with editing, re-writing, and adjustements.

Also, when you're done writing let it rest. Coming back to a text you think is finished 1-2 days later can be very illuminating, as opposed to posting straight away.

I hope this is useful in some way, and if it isn't, maybe this could be more up to your speed:

(Don't be intimidated by the equation. That was a very optional tip in a runtime of friendlier ones)

This lecture has some engaging tips on quickly snapping up concepts for short stories - your intention may not be writing a short story, but you still can get a kick out of how quickly she can structure them, brainstorming, what is used to give a sense of narrative progress, how to break complex things into bites, etc. Don't be afraid to learn stuff from people who have been doing this for longer than you have, but remember no writing instruction is necessarily universal.

[crowsent]

a fuckton of things i want in da4

a few words censored bc tumblr will swallow this in the void if i dont. long ass fuck list ahead

a romanceable dwarf

more romanceable elves/qunari

more elf/qunari/dwarf companions

consistent writing for once

more nb representation

good hair. please just give me good hair options. give me long hair. give me luxurious flowing locks. give me braids. give me good fucking hair options

let me shittalk the chantry

dalish elf npcs that impact the plot in unique ways

dalish elf companions that are proud of being dalish

if it is set in tevinter maybe uh. maybe address the issue of systemic oppression (and slavery) of elves???????

a return of the friendship/rivalry system in da2 but improved. maybe instead of a friendship rivalry sliding scale its friendship/rivalry/animosity sliding scale. bc rivalry is more like. two people pushing each other to be better than they were before. friendly competition. hes an idiot but hes my idiot kind of deal. animosity would be just regular disapproval. i liked the crisis cutscenes in dai so high animosity would be the same as low approval and might make the companion leave still, but theres more variety with high approval. high approval “friendship” would be the “were best friends and we share many opinions and agree on almost everything” while high approval “rivalry” being “we disagree on almost everything but goddamn it youre my friend and ill follow you into the fade if i have to” so you can have a high approval with someone instead of being a kissass

actions and choices having consequences again

multiple endings again (epilogue slideshows dont count)

dialogue wheels with descriptions that match what you actually say

characters from rivain, antiva, anderfels, etc

gifts. bring back the gifts. i want to give my companions gifts

maybe. maybe a focus of non-andrastian religion for once?

let me shittalk the chantry

i know its a stretch, but maybe. diverse skin colours. please?

nd characters that are written respectfully and treated w dignity

please bring back the talent wheel from dao and da2

more bi romance options

more wlw romance options

more mlm romance options

ace romance options

nb romance options

background romances

let me shittalk the chantry

far fetched but maybe a polycule?

i lowkey LOVED the fast-paced feel of da2s combat so maybe bring that back in some form? maybe improved to mesh with the tactics of dai to give players absolute freedom of playstyle whether they want to be like me and rush into every encounter or play more strategically

companions with unique companion abilities

would be nice to explore cities

would be nice if the open world were a little smaller so it doesnt feel empty all the gd time

more mage spells. mages felt like just another class of fighter to me in dai. they dont really have any awe-inducing wow factor like in dao or even da2. if the narrative wants me to believe that mages are powerful and dangerous and that it takes multiple templars to hunt down an apostate, maybe show that? give me strong mages

remove the jump ability. its pointless

a narrative that addresses the oppression that the chantry and templars perpetuated please

bring back the attributes

make the choices in dai matter. mages governing themselves? i wanna see that

let me shittalk the chantry

please bring back the healing magic for fucks sakes

multi-class system between rogues and warriors?

multiple specialisations that feel like specialisations and not just skill tree+

player-only skill trees

hardening

companion quests that affect their abilities and further dialogue

actual morally grey choices instead of this stupid mage freedom vs templar oppression narrative that is in no way morally grey but is presented as such and thus leaves the conflicts and narratives set up by dao and da2 to be fucking meaningless

bring back the tactics

would be nice to have an origins-esque prologue again. maybe one that would determine future events in game just to give your character better narrative cohesion with the plot

an approval/disapproval system but for companions with other companions. bringing certain companions together may bring them closer or make them pissed off with each other which affects banter maybe quests maybe combat

give me a fucking mabari bioware. give me back my fucking mabari

day/night cycle

a nightmare mode where you have to finish the main quest on a time limit. it is absurd that dai expects me to believe that i have all this time to do wartable missions that can take literal real life DAYS to finish and still thwart corypheus’ plans in time. bullshit

that said. no more wartable missions. waiting for a countdown to finish isnt very fun

let me shittalk the chantry

kal-sharok. ive been hearing about it since dao let me fucking see kal-sharok

dwarven politics

politics in general. my fav dao quest was the succession crisis plotline in orzammar/the landsmeet and wewh in dai

npcs i can talk to. even with generic dialogue like in dao. makes the world more alive

using the environment to your advantage. far fetched but i would love to be able to pull down boulders if were in the mountains or freeze water to get to places as a mage

home base customisation but the customisation choices you make actually. mean something. and do something. or at the very least give more companion dialogue/banter/approval change

laconic and ergonomic codexes. like. sorted by what kind of codex it is, etc etc but then you just get a brief summary of the codex and the option to read more about it so i dont spend eternity scrolling through cards looking for a specific codex entry. cool aesthetic dont get me wrong but real irritating to deal with. also. maybe. the pc making comments about the codex if you do read more about it? like a dalish elf saying “they got it all wrong” when reading a codex about dalish elves written by a human??? that would a) give character to the pc b) incentivise people to actually read the codex to see what was so wrong about it c) summarise the codex for people who want to learn the lore but dont want to spent the entire game reading text

maybe have the merchants in your home base close to crafting stations so you dont have to take a fucking hike if you miscounted the amount of elfroot you need?

let me shittalk the chantry

avvar companion maybe??? interesting lore right there

bring back stat requirements for weapons and remove the class restriction for most shit. obviously a dagger would be better for a rogue than a longsword and a mage would do better with a staff than a sword and shield but its not about efficiency. its about the roleplay. its about the options. give me the option to make a mage with wildly inappropriate stat distribution

bring back sustained mode abilities

traps. bring back traps. bring back the option to stealth into an area, trap the fuck out of it, and go from there

have the three available classes in kind of a rock paper scissors scenario. warriors do real well against rogues who do real well against mages who do real well against warriors. so you can plan your party depending on who/what youll face AND how much their approval will change during the quest you take them on

let me shittalk the chantry

actually resolve the plot points introduced in dai

a more threatening villain. the inquisitor thwarted every attempt made by corypheus in dai. he was not threatening at all

queer characters. background, companions, etc. queer characters

mounts were meh in dai. maybe. make them faster? or less cumbersome? or have your companions on mounts too so theres still banter?

i liked the armour tinting. let me have armour tinting from the beginning

i would really like mages to move and attack at the same time bc lowkey standing in one spot is uhhhhhhh kinda boring

let me check companions friendship/rivalry levels

would be nice if the narrative acknowledged that elves suffered greatly at the hands of the chantry and stopped victim-blaming them

more taverns. specifically like tapsters in dao where theres a dwarf just reciting something in a language i cant understand and if you look its a ballad/poet about dwarven culture and that was a real nice touch let me have that

dalish elf clan. dalish elf clan that does not get murdered please and thank you

meaningful quests. more cinematic dialogue

make found gear / quest reward gear more valuable than crafted gear

game modifiers like in dai were real nice. i want more

let me shittalk the chantry

quests that can be resolved in multiple ways. like connors fate in dao. and for those ways to impact further quests

companions with varying moral alignments

companions that are mutually exclusive (like alistair and loghain) but are both good companions so itd really make you think

a pc that IS NOT a “chosen one” vanilla da2 is my fav dragon age game for one reason and one reason only and that is because hawke is just some random refugee who escaped lothering. no chosen one magic at all. just an ordinary person who is a real good fighter. and that appealed to me more than this “you are the only one who can do it” narrative

let me meet more elvhen gods

if the setting is in tevinter, GIVE ME FUCKING ARCHITECTURE. give me the high spires, the archways, the buttresses, give me statues lining city gates and magic infused into the buildings. tevinter is a land ruled by MAGES give me magical architecture. give me floating buildings. give me fire floating as orbs above the streets like lamps. GIVE ME ARCHITECTURE

SHALE

let me shittalk the chantry

PIERCINGS GIVE ME FUCKING PIERCINGS BIOWARE

more main quests, longer main quests

if it is set in tevinter maybe. maybe address the fact that tevinter has been at war with the qunari for a while? on and off war is still war. and maybe give us the option to influence the outcome of that war?

more voice options. instead of just american voice or british voice, do the thing in dao again where there are multiple voices of different tones to further cement the pcs personality

more armour designs

biased but uh. can. can taliesen jaffe va a character?

i already said qunari companions but specifically saarebas companions

blood magic

FINISHING MOVE ANIMATIONS

please do not let it be as long as inquisition. inquisition was a SLOG in later playthroughs

body sliders. what if i want a tall but lanky qunari? what if i want a buff as shit elf? body sliders

more eye options

let me call out companions

btw bioware. if you really wanted cullen to be a good guy. maybe handle his fucking redemption arc a little better instead of retconning all the terrible and creepy shit hes done in the past k thx

can female walk/run animations not have. so much swaying hips? no one moves like that

personality dialogue that affects future dialogue like in da2 but meshed with the wider range of emotions introduced by dai

keep the race/s*x lock on romance candidates like in dai. keep the fact that some characters can only be romanced by certain races or s*xes

nb and genderqueer options for the pc

cutscenes of companions interacting

ngl i lowkey liked the random encounters of dao so maybe bring that back

my fav quest in dao is the landsmeet / orzammar succession crisis questline but you know whats my second favourite? the rescue mission if the warden gets captured and you have to play as your party members. give me that again

more creepy/dark shit. dai was too lighthearted for me esp after da2 and dao

let me shittalk the chantry

broodmothers. in hd.

red lyrium broodmothers. in hd

companions with different backgrounds. different faiths. different statuses. different families. etc

maybe make the pcs appearance make an impact on the story? like how bull says he likes redheads, but even if you are a redhead, he says nothing about it????? maybe keep track of which slider the player picks so that can affect the story?

i love my inquisitors but maybe. dont. bring the inquisitor in as anything more than an advisor/npc in this game? let me fall in love with a new pc???

if theres gonna be a homebase like skyhold where youre not in armor. maybe give us better clothing?

a kind of gear skin mechanic similar to ac:odyssey where you can change how the gear looks but keep the stats. so you can equip that higher level armour and keep the look and aesthetic of your old armour and you unlock the skins/looks of the armours you discover/make so you can be both powerful AND aesthetic

i enjoyed the nobility/underworld/arcane/etc knowledge in dai unlocking more dialogue options so maybe keep/expand on that but make it more accessible by side missions or companions or something that isnt the abysmal perk system in dai

let me shittalk the chantry

customisable walking animations. does the pc walk straightbacked? slouched? with a swagger? please

since there will undoubtedly be an obligatory fade sequence, maybe have an option for nightmare demons that ARENT spiders. thank you

slap on subtitles and conlang some languages. i want to hear elvish. i want to hear tevene. give me the languages

more dragons. esp if they look vastly different

more bard songs

i am completely biased here, but i would like to hear laura bailey as a va for a character. preferably a voice option for the pc

hey maybe have the true ending actually included in the base game and not in a dlc (tresppasser cough cough)

better val royeaux

please remove the had to do it to em idle animation tis distracting

on that note, more idle animations. maybe some unique to companions?

very trivial but. unique stair climbing/descending animation

bring back talking to companions on the road. maybe with some dialogue that can only be said on the road???

if banter is interrupted, make like rdr2 and pick up where the banter left off

more vallaslin designs please?

if theres another formal scene like dai maybe. give us. decent clothing. or better yet, decen clothing OPTIONS. i wanna decide how i look in a ball full of haughty orlesians

mage vs templar conflict resolved and addressed please. it is NOT resolved in dai. what we got was sequel bait and a slideshow. resolve it please

let me shittalk the chantry

a pro-mage anti-circle circle mage companion like anders

religious person who doesnt victim-blame elves in the codex or in game or anywhere please

characters more like leliana who question the chantry and acknowledge its corruption and greed

unapologetically sapphic companion

idc if its tevinter i dont want to fucking see queer people being disrespected

a true tal-vashoth companion, one who escaped from the qun

have quest decisions affect whether or not a companion will turn hostile to you or not

if IF solas will be redeemed, please do the redemption arc right

more horn options for qunari

an apostate mage who doesnt use me for their personal agenda whilst hiding something from me (morrigan, anders, solas) thanks

i really dig the whole “leader of an army” thing dai was trying to go for. but you didnt actually. lead. anything. would be nice to have that option. command soldiers. send them places that affect further quests. would even use the wartable for its intended purpose. planning wars. battles. like. you get sent word that there are bandits harassing villagers. you can set up an ambush with your soldiers or confront them headon, and theres a new mini-location on the map like the manor you meet vivienne in where you can go deal with the bandits and depending on your choices, there are actually soldiers with you in a field, or traps in a narrow pass, or even in a city. id rather the wartable shit dont return but if they have to, at least this way youre not just waiting real life time for a bunch of text to appear

i am real fucking excited for the possibility that da4 companions can just fucking die on you. good shit. give me that angst

missions that certain companions would refuse to go with you to. you know. so you actually have to use other members of your party instead of the same 3 (three) people all the goddamn time

disabled characters (i want a character who suffers from the same chronic bad leg disease as i do is that too much to ask)

kinda touched on by the da2 combat point but let me do close combat damage with the staff

no multiplayer. and if there is a multiplayer, dont tie it with achievements

let me fucking explore weisshaupt

(i dont think solas will be the endgame villain of da and i dont think da4 will be the last da game but still) again. for emphasis. resolve the plot points dai brought up

full-body scars and tattoo options

companions and npcs changing their opinions about things over time. eg: a pro-circle mage wanting instead for circles to be abolished after a specific side mission or a main quest decision etc

keep the multiple companion quests. and maybe change what kinds of companion quests are available further down depending on choices made in previous companion quests

please for fucks sake give us more characters of colour

let me shittalk the chantry

[akasuki]

Tw ra*pe. Tw dr*wning. Tw kn*fe/ cut*ing someone. (I can’t remember what I’m allowed to say on tumblr so I’m gonna censor a lot srry). Maybe more tw’s I’m not sure just be careful reading this I just wanted to share this story and talk about something important. I decided to tell this story and talk about this point after I saw your stuff about gator and how people were talking about adults just assuming minors don’t know about p*rn and why it’s not a good idea and can be damaging espically if you are or plan on ever being a parent.

I hate how people treat minors like they’re blind to the world of p*rn. It’s so stupid, especially this generation social media has gotten so much better as well as access to info. It’s practically impossible to not hear about it. Even if you don’t have a device there’s ways to find about like public school. I personally have great parents who always normalized s*x . To me it was a normal thing that would happen when you get older and I am SO thankful to my parents for that because if made the story I’m about to tell so much easier.

When I was eight I was exposed to a darker side of porn by a family friends kid (she was 14 at the time I think maybe younger). It had consensual r*pe which is people basically role playing getting r*ped it also included Cut*ing, ki*napping, dr*owning, and other forms of to*ture. (I think it was roleplaying due to the fact the women were wearing heels and shit in a forest) To this day even though I have a sh*t memory I can remember almost every detail to this day from the outfits in the vid to the setup of the room we were watching it in. I’m still not fully sure how I did this but I somehow forced myself to forget it when I was younger (till I was about 13 I think). Which is quite dangerous because it could have caused me to develop split personality’s (where one is stuck is a 8 year olds mind and another acts as a defense and protects the other from trauma) . Now onto the point of this story as a kid my parents had normalized s*x as a thing that happens when your an adult. By doing that not only did it take away some of the shame of the hole experience but it also made me able to come to them and talk about it. (Which seriously helped haveing my parents there to support and help me through the trauma). Now I’m not saying as a parent you need to talk about s*x all the time all I’m saying is that you should normalize the idea of it and possibly of it happening. Most importantly DONT shame them on it. I completely get if they’re doing something like talking to an adult about it and you are worried about them. In that case do what you can to stop communication and talk to them about how it is wrong. Make sure they know it’s not ok but don’t shame or make them feel as though it was they’re fault.

Sorry if I rambled I just wanted to talk about how we need to normalize this stuff because if you don’t it can cause worse reactions to other bad stuff including fear of venting. Also do you think I could be 🕊 if not 🎨 ,🌻, or 🌼anon? I’ve been a lurker for a while and I would love to interact more!

I'm not very good at comforting, but I'm extremely sorry that that happened to you. No child should get exposed to something as traumatising as that could have been at a very young age. I do agree that parents should normalise subjects like sex etc. maybe not make it the only thing you talk about, but make it something natural that may happen when you get older, shaming the child isn't a way to go here. Yes you can be 🕊 anon! Welcome aboard :))

[acescreations]

Roleplay Transcript (pt. 1)

So this is an old roleplay I got permission from my RP partner to post to my writing blog. I guess revisiting this is kind of a birthday gift to myself and also an apology gift to all of you guys for not writing for shit.

Warnings: Fighting, swearing, violence, verbal abuse, emotional abuse, homophobia, panic attacks

Ship(s): Platonic Analogical

Word Count: 12,553

When Logan went to school on his first day of junior year, he was filled with a strange sense of pride. Students shot glances at him, seemingly worried that Logan would for some reason pick a fight with them, which he would only really do if they were being a jerk and deserved it. Teachers read his name off the attendance list with a hopeless tone upon realizing they had Logan, before looking up with a disappointed resignation when they saw Logan's patch of electric blue hair. Logan had built up a reputation of being strong, of being tough. Just about every kid in school knew about him, whether they be the bullies he fought, the kids he was defending from the bullies, or just the people who saw the fights he was in.

Virgil’s first day at Mindset High was pretty scary. He didnt make friends easily, and he felt like everyone was judging him. He wore a soft lavender hoodie and royal purple sweat pants. Everyone seemed scared of this guy called Logan. I mean, he seemed so grumpy.. He sighed, sitting next to Logan.

Logan blinked in surprise as he watched another student sit down next to him. Most people tried to avoid him as much as possible, so he usually sat alone during class. Even when there were only enough desks for each student in the classroom, people usually pulled their desk a distance away after even the slightest glance from Logan. He guessed this kid sitting next to him hadn't heard of his reputation yet. Well, unfortunately for him, the two were in Logan's least favorite class: history. The class that Logan now associated with whitewashed nationalist propaganda, and arguing with the teacher.

Virgil decided that he would at least get to know this strange man that everyone seemed so.. reluctant to like？ “Uh, hello, I’m.. well, if..  I’m Virgil.” He said tamely, he hoped that they could.. maybe talk？A friend would be nice.

Logan looked over at Virgil with an even, if not cold, expression. That wasn't a name he recognized, so this was probably a new student, which explained why they were actually talking to him. "Logan," he said shortly. They'd learn soon enough that Logan was someone you didn't want to be associated with if you want to have even just a neutral social standing.

Virgil nodded nervously. The dude seemed to be angry at him？Did he provoke him？Should he move seats？ He sighed as he looked down at his work.

Logan put his feet up on the table in front of him, pulling out his phone as he waited for the teacher to, as he put it, "begin his attempt at brainwashing a class of impressionable teenagers."

“Today we shall learn about the history of people that.. well.. people who.. the homosexuals.. and.. others.” Virgil was completely stunned, before immediately grtting dissapointed. “Well fuck me gently with a chainsaw.” He mumbled.

"Oh hell no," Logan said out loud. Literally everyone in the room probably already guessed about Logan not being straight, so he didn't have anything to lose from being vocal about his distaste over the lesson. "Oh, FUCK no." Underneath his iwn complaining, however, he heard Virgil's much more quiet complaint. Okay, so this guy is actually pretty chill. That's good to know. By "chill" Logan meant "not a smallminded conservative" but those pretty much meant the same thing to him.

Virgil sighed. “This.. is fine.” He said. He was a closeted gay boy, he didnt need this. “Now, this shall be respectful..” The teacher rolled her eyes. “Now, what do we know about.. you know.. those people.”

Logan heard what Virgil said, but to him, this most certainly was not fine. He had already picked his battles, and he picked all of them. "If it's gonna be respectful then why don't you just say the word 'Gay'?" he yelled at the teacher.

The class went dead silent. Virgil sighed softly. If someone found out he was gay, he would die on the inside. “Well, as you all know, the bible said that homosexuals.. will rot in hell.”

"FALSEHOOD!" Logan screamed, slamming his hands on the table as he stood up. "Respectful my ass! And how is this even history?!" Logan would go on, but if he's learned anything from the debate team, it's to let people keep saying stupid shit for Logan to prove wrong.

“Homosexuality is a diease. Now, now more recent years, we have homosexuality shoved down our throats. This is causing more parents to force their children to be gay. This all started because a black trans-” “Please stop talking..” Virgil groaned, tempted to just bash his head into the table.

"Gayness is NOT a disease," Logan said, smacking his hand on the table as he began talking over the teacher. "It's a human characteristic just like height or eye color. Gayness is NOT being 'shoved down our throats,'" he smacked the table again, "people are just getting introduced to labels they didn't originally have. Parents are NOT forcing their children to be gay-" smack "- most are actually beating and throwing their children out of their homes for being gay. But you know what? You just keep talking. Maybe one of these days you'll actually say something intelligent."

“You come from a biased pretense！You only see the side of the homosexuals, thats why you are one of the-” “OH, FOR FUCKS SAKE, CHANGE THE GOD DAMN SUBJECT YOU-” “Damn pastel！Didnt know you could speak.” A guy called out.

Logan immediately turned and shot a glare at the person who insulted Virgil, forgetting the current feud with the teacher for a moment. "If you're going to waste oxygen like that, at least keep it relevant to the conversation." Logan then turned back to the teacher. "You're the fucking biased one, you homophobe!" he shouted, pointing a finger at the teacher as he leaned nearly halfway across the table to yell at him.

“I am not a homophobe！I like.. the lesbians.” The teacher smirked, as Virgil began to laugh. Hes just,, this teacher, how did you get a job？ ”Fine. We will move onto a differ-”

For once in his life, Logan is so stunned by by what he's hearing reaches a loss for words. "How did you even get your teaching degree, you fucking creep?"

“I try to act respectful, and you insult me？I think people like you just stir up drama to draw attention to yourself.” Virgil had stopped laughing. He felt.. guilty. He shouldnt have laughed. Maybe the teacher was right？

Logan went completely silent, his hands curling into fists. "Don't. You. Ever. Generalize me. Like that." Then, to make sure he didn't try to physically fight his teacher, he walked out the door, slamming it behind him.

Virgil watched Logan leave, watched everyone whispering about how freaky Logan was. How gay he was.. Virgil stayed quiet and refused to speak to anyone.

Logan stormed down the hallway, absolutely fuming. He ended up in the school's gym, knowing there wasn't a gym class that period. He let out a shout of frustration as he punched a wall, which hurt, obviously, but it satisfied him and let out some of his anger. After that he just stood there, fist against the wall, breathing heavily.

Virgils scheduele was lost, so he asked around for his next class. They led him to the schools gym, and left him there, lost and confused. Time to make an unlikely friend.

Logan had since moved to sit on the bleachers, glancing up to glare as Virgil entered the gym. He was currently in a mindset that nobody would be friendly towards him, especially right now.

Virgil felt the glare, but sighed. He did promise Patton to make one friend at this god forsaken hell hole. He slowly walks up to Logan. “Uhrm, hi？”

"What do you want?" Logan growled. He recognized that this was the person who was sitting beside him in history, but he still felt like he'd antagonize Logan anyway. Most people did anyway.

He gave Logan a weak smile. “A..Are you okay？” He tilted his head. ”And where is the rest of our class？” He expected at least one othed person to come in. Poor thing.

"I'm fine," Logan snapped defensively, in a counter-productive attempt at convincing Virgil that that was actually true. "And there isn't a class in here right now." Logan didn't have a gym class at all. He was actually skipping a class right now, but it wasn't like his teacher would miss him anyway.

“Oh..” He stammered, looked down at the floor guiltily. “Do you know where S7 is？” He rubbed the back of his neck. “And.. wait. Why arent you in class.. oh.”

Logan sighed as he stood up. "Yeah, come on." He gestured for Virgil to follow him with a small shrug of a shoulder.

Virgil smiled. “Thank you, Logan.” He said softly, following behind him, glad that Logan would do this for him.

Logan shrugged as he began leading Virgil to his classroom. "Whatever," he muttered. Whatever it took to get himself his alone time in the gym. He doubted it would do Virgil's social reputation much good to see him with Logan, though.

“To be honest, that ass of a teacher really should be fired. What kind of creep just likes lesbians？” He tried to make small talk.

"Basically the entire American public does, actually." Logan was pretty sure it was a rhetorical question, but it wasn't like he was wrong, he thought.

“oh.. well.. thats..” Virgil sighed. “Why were you there alone instead of hanging out with friends？” He seemed rather done.

Logan glanced back at Virgil, although he didn't stop walking. "Because there are classes going on right now," Logan said. It was true, although Logan wasn't hanging out with friends because he didn't have any. He just wasn't going to tell Virgil that.

“Dont you have a badass like, gang？Like everyone says？” He tilted his head, very confused. “Oh.. are you.. uh..” He was genuinely confused.

"A gang?" Logan said in mild surprise and disbelief. That was seriously what people said about him? Logan guessed he underestimated his own reputation.

“Yeah. Also, apparently you dont like when people steal your role, so you are going to beat my ass. If you are, then I guess do it here.” He has no fear for death anymore. This school sucked any hope of caring out of him.

"What exactly do people say my role is then?" Logan hadn't intended on carrying on a conversation for this long, or really at all, but he couldn't help but be curious as to what people said about him.

He stared up at the sky, he really didnt want to say this. Dear god, please strike him with lighting. Oh, no lighting？F- “You’re the bad boy that all the girls swoon over. Apparently you’re soft and sweet on the inside.” He scoffed slightly. His defense is up.

Logan stiffened as he continued walking, gagging a little. That was it. It was official. Logan hated his reputation. He supposed he'd have to work harder on establishing his reputation as being stone cold and heartless. He wasn't going to stop picking fights with bigots though, he knew that much. "Well, here's your class," he said to Virgil, stopping in front of a classroom before immediately turning go back to the gym instead of the class he had that period.

“Thanks Logan.” He gave him a weak grin. “Logan Man, Fighting off bigots day after day.” He scoffed, before it turned to a light giggle, and Virgil went into class. What a dork. A nice dork.

Logan glanced back as he walked off, turning back after Virgil walked into class. As he neared the gym again, he glanced down at his left knuckles. After punching the wall, they became red and sore, and Logan was starting to regret punching the wall. His hand still stung.

This is why you dont start a war on walls, you idiot. Virgils class exprience was.. intresting. They made up rumors about him and Logan, and Virgil wanted to vomit. Love always made him feel weird and uncomfortable, but hes absolutely sure hes just gay.

Logan sat back down in the gym bleachers. He didn't know what he was doing back here instead of going to class. He guessed he pretty much didn't want to hear whatever his classmates would say about him. That was actually the first time he stormed out in the middle of class like that, and he assumed that was what people would be talking about right now.

They began to gossip about Logan having a girlfriend, boyfriend, and then him being in a gang. Now they all think Logans a fucking gang leader. Good luck talking to anyone, Logie.

After sitting in the gym with nothing to do for a while, Logan stood back up and headed to the band room. That was where he usually went when he wanted alone time, the gym had just been closer that time. As he walked down, he realized that being a musician probably contributed to people thinking he's "soft and sweet on the inside" but fuck it. Music is probably the reason he doesn't throw hands with every mildly unpleasant person in his vicinity.

Virgil cant stop laughing at the pure idiocity, wanting to just record this and send it to Logan... Eh, later. Once he befriends Logan. He nods to himself as the bell rung. Now he could go find Logan！And hang out with him！

Logan had just reached the band room by the time the bell rang. "God dammit," he said loudly. Now he'd have to choose between letting out some energy and missing another class. Logan sat down behind the drumset in the room, pulling out his phone and earbuds. He figured his teacher wouldn't miss him, and really, who cares if the teacher calls his house? Who gives a shit? Certainly not him. So he put on a pair of fingerless gloves he kept with him, turned on his music, and played along to American Idiot.

Virgil was going to class, but heard... music？He quietly walks towards the sounds, peering in. They had a music room？！ Logan plays music？！ He quietly attempted to sneak in, to be able to hear better. He ended up tripping into a guitar, miraculously not breaking it.

Most people would've heard Virgil tripping as he snuck in, but not only was Logan listening to really loud music, but he was also playing a really loud instrument. But really, neither of those things meant much, because Logan was in The Zone. It would take a lot to break his focus.

Virgil was extremely impressed. Logan really was in the mood. He sat on the floor, just admiring the music.

Logan looked up once the song had ended, quickly pulling out his earbuds and jolting upwards once he saw Virgil sitting there. "What the hell are you doing here?"

“...Uhhhhh, I thought this was the cafeteria？Nice pl-playing.” He quickly stood up, immediately smackin into a cupboard and just sighing softly.

"Of course this isn't the fucking cafeteria, do you see any tabl-" Logan went quiet for a moment when he saw the knocked over guitar. He practically threw himself over the drumset as he ran to check on the guitar, because despite the fact that the school technically owned all of the instruments, that was Logan's Guitar. "The fuck did you do?!" Logan shouted as he checked the guitar over for any damage.

He quickly stood up. “See-ing a-as this isnt the cafeteria, I-I’m going to-” He began to speed for thr door.

Logan looked back up once he was sure his guitar was alright. Once he saw Virgil heading for the door, it occurred to him what he had just done. "I, I didn't mean to snap," he said apologetically, rubbing the back of his head as he looked away from Virgil. This new body language was a complete change from how he usually acts.

Virgil paused, reluctantly rubbing the back of his neck. “U-Uh, oh, ok-okay. I’m.. I’m sorry. You.. You clearly werent..” All words just seemed to die in his mouth.

Logan sighed as he stood back up. "Whatever, just, try not to knock any instruments over, okay?" Logan mumbled as he began walking past Virgil out the door. Okay, so he didn't mumble, but compared to how clearly he normally speaks he might as well have been.

"Thank you, L-Logan." He stammered. He didnt move, just awkwardly standing there. "O-Oh, uh, of course.. Uh, can I sit with you at lunch?" He managed through jumbled stammering.

Logan glanced back at Virgil as he walked out, trying to understand the logic of wanting to be around somebody who just yelled at you for something that wasn't intentional. Logan was hoping it wasn't anything like Logan being nice, because if Logan was the nicest person Virgil knew, well that's just sad. "Sure, whatever." Logan shrugged. He didn't actually know if he was actually going to stay until lunch, since he had been planning on leaving for the rest of the day. He shrugged at himself as he left the band room. Logan supposed he'd find out by lunch.

Virgil just followed after him, quietly. Hey, Logans the nicest guy here at this hell hole of a school, Well, the nicest guy he has met. He looks around, feeling awkward. Oh god. Why is he bothering Logan. He doesnt want you here. Just leave. "Uh-"

Logan attempted to continue walking as normal, despite the ever present awareness of Virgil following him. After all, by the looks of this kid, he's definitely harmless. Although after a while it became hard to ignore the little lost puppy of Virgil. "What are you following me for?" Logan asked over his shoulder. "Don't you have a class or something?" Honestly, how is anyone supposed to let out some steam when someone is following them everywhere?

Virgil flinched. "uh.. yeah.. sure.." He mumbled, and he quickly left. He didnt know why he cared so much. Oh wait, yes he did. Because he wanted Logan's friend. Why? Because he found Logan cool.

Logan sighed once Virgil left. He didn't really know why. Was he disappointed? Logan actually thought he might be. That was probably the longest anyone had ever voluntarily been around him, after all. Either way, Logan still had no idea what to do at this point, especially considering that if he left before school ended he'd definitely have to deal with the consequences soon enough.

Virgil headed off into the bathroom. He just needed somewhere to stay calm, and clear his head. Everything just made him feel horrible. He quietly locked himself into a stall, keeping himself quiet.

Logan leaned against a wall in the hallway, getting out his phone as he debated his options. If he left school now, Virgil wouldn't have to worry about his mistake of wanting to be around him during lunch, but his mom would be pissed if she found out he didn't even stay half of the day. But if he stayed and went to class, he'd half a lot of pent up anger with him during class, and his home had probably already been called due to him not having made it to this class period, so he'd still probably hear about it anyway.

Virgil calmed himself down, and went back outside. He looked around, wondering if Logan was still around. He.. He hoped so. He is not going to that hell hole alone.

Logan sighed as he put his phone away, finally heading to class. He was pretty sure that it was the world's most stupid desicion for Virgil to want to be anywhere near him, but as a new kid who clearly had no idea how to survive in this school, he probably wouldn't be very safe if he was alone during lunch.

Virgil quietly sighed, deciding to go to class. He hid his eyes with his hair. He slunk into the back of the class, trying to keep away from everyone.

Logan managed to keep himself from throwing hands for the rest of his morning class, heading down to the lunchroom afterwards. He stood against a wall and watched people enter without personally eating.

Once that hellish excuse for a class was done, Virgil quietly found Logan and walked up to him. “Uh, hi.”

Logan looked over at Virgil, honestly kind of surprised that he committed to his decision to spend the lunch period with Logan. "Hey," he said briefly, looking back across the room.

He gave him a pathetic grin, trying to not be awkward, but the boy radiates awkward. “Uh, uhm, er, hi.” He began to play with his hands, biting his lip.

"You don't talk to people much, do you?" Logam didn't look back at Virgil as he spoke. Was he hoping Virgil would decide Logan actually was unpleasant to be around and leave? Yeah, Logan thought he was.

“N-Not really.” He mumbled, not moving, copying Logans pose. He wasnt exactly enjoying the people staring at him, but hes happy having a friend.

Logan's surprise grew as Virgil started copying him. He didn't know why, but that was really unexpected. "Aren't you going to eat or something?" Logan was determined to not let his surprise, or really any other emotion, show.

Virgil shook his head, deciding a verbal response wasnt worth it. Plus, the food looked like slop. He fidgetted with his hands, trying to spark a conversation.

Logan glanced over at Virgil, trying to figure out what to do in this situation. God, this kid is making me more awkward just by being around me. It's a wonder he's survived this long.

Virgil thought about his family. His family sucked. It would be nice to know what raised that hardcore lad. “Uh... Whats your family like？” He said softly. God fUcking damn it, Virgil. You cant ask about anything N O RM A L-

The change in Logan's posture was immediate. His back straightened, his shoulders became more squared, his hands tightened into fists. "Why do you care?" Logan's voice was cold and hard as knives.

Virgil shrunk back, his eyes wide. “I-I dont know？I’m just trying to make conversations..” He trailed off, going silent. Wait. Why was Logan caring so much. “Oh god, are you an orp-”

Logan scoffed at that second comment, giving Virgil the slightest shake of his head and somehow managing to make those small actions violent and angry. I wish I was that lucky.

Virgil flinched. He felt his heart race at those angry movements. “Uh, er.. sorry.” Virgil practically sped off, he feels sick.

Logan turned and watched him go. If he were in any other mood, he'd probably feel bad for scaring Virgil like that. But right now he didn't even care, he simply turned back to glare at the rest of the people in the room.

The whispers of the room continued, questioning Logan and why he doesnt like his family

Logan didn't say anything to anyone, although when he heard someone talking about him he'd shoot a glare at them to get them to shut up.

The cafeteria was awkward and quiet. Nobody wanted to talk to Logan, or get beaten up.

Eventually Logan got tired of the stares and went back to the gym. He would've went to the band room, but there was a class there at the time, so he had to go with the next best thing.

Virgil was sitting behind the bleachers, desperately trying to calm himself. Logan hates him. Everyone hates him. He hates this hell-hole of a school.

Logan didn't notice Virgil as he came in, walking over to a padded part of the wall so he could punch it and not hurt himself again. He punched the wall, then drew his hand back and punched again, and again, and again. He hated his mother. He hated every single boyfriend she had ever had. He hated this school. He hated that he was always alone. He hated that this one time somebody actually wanted to be around him, he was determined to scare them off. He hated everything right now.

The punches just terrified Virgil even more. Oh great. Now a murderer was after him. He let out a strangled gasp, as his world began to spin round, making Virgil shake.

Logan paused when he heard the gasp behind him. He turned and finally noticed Virgil behind him, and of course it was only after he started panicking. Logan stood there, trying to figure out if he should go try to help, considering he was probably the thing causing Virgil to panic and being closer might just make it worse.

He couldnt breathe. The gasps became more frequent. Fuck. Hes gonna die here. Hes gonna die alone. Jesus this is getting sad.

Soon enough, Logan decided on walking over, kneeling down in front of Virgil. It wasn't like he was getting any better without Logan interacting. "Hey, Virgil?" Logan started in the most even voice he could produce. "I'm gonna need you to calm down, can you do that? Just focus on breathing." Fuck, is this what you're supposed to do? Logan honestly didn't have a clue, but from what he did know about panic attacks this seemed like an appropriate response.

Virgil trembles, before his blood stopped. Logan. “I-I’m sorry！I’m sorry！I-I-I-I...” He hears that Logans hear to help. “I-I cant- I-I’m a failure！”

Upon hearing Virgil's words, Logan's hands curled into fists. He was immediately ready to fight on behalf of someone he didn't even know. Then Logan reminded himself that right now, fighting was not in fact going to help. He took a deep breath, forcing his hands to relax again before continuing to talk to Virgil. "No, you're not a failure, there's no need to be sorry." Logan slowly reached out and took one of Virgil's hands in his own, checking for his reaction.

Virgil jolted, scramming away, apologizing. “I said- I said sorry！P-Please.. Leave me alone.” He sobbed. “I-I-I-” He felt his throat constrict.

Logan quickly pulled his hands away from Virgil, feeling guilt like a stab in his gut. This was all because of him, wasn't it? Maybe he should just leave, Virgil did tell Logan to leave him alone, didn't he? And Logan was pretty sure he just made it worse because he had no idea how to help, so Virgil would probably be better off if Logan left him alone.

Virgil whimpers, god hes so pathetic. Such a useless person. “Pathetic.. Useless..” He mumbled softly, looking away from Logan. The attack was beginning to die down, but he wouldnt be calm for a while.

Logan opened his mouth, about to correct Virgil on what he was saying about himself, but then he hesitated, and soon closed his mouth again. Logan looked down at the floor as he slowly stood back up and left, his endgoal being the doors leading out of the school. Logan officially decided he was done with being around people for a good while. Logan easily ignored the stares of the people in the halls. Most people took one look at Logan's overall demeanor and knew not to stare, so Logan was able to get out the school doors without even being interuppted.

Virgil made sure to keep close to Logan. He felt so guilty, he can’t believe he was so stupid. He had to have Logan come help him from a panic attack！All he is, is a panicky, clingy, failure.

Logan sighed and turned around as he got outside the door, facing Virgil. "Don't you have something better to do? Like class or something?" Logan was trying not to snap, especially since Virgil had just gotten out of a panic attack, but his voice was still harsh. Logan just wanted an escape from people, and now this little lost puppy of a person was becoming the first and only obstacle to that.

He kept his mouth shut. He felt so awkward. Like he owed Logan and apology. For seeing that. For seeing how much of a mess he was.. Yeah, he left soon after Logan spoke.

Logan walked away from the school after that, although he didn't really know where he was going. All he really knew at the time was that he wanted to escape from people, despite the fact that he didn't know where he could go that didn't have people. Logan ended up going over to the park, deciding that the park would have the least amount of people. After a while Logan had calmed down enough to tolerate human connection again, and walked down to the local café, because despite its black color, the fabric of Logan's jacket did little to protect him from the cold. He almost smiled as he walked through the door of the café, looking at the pride flag sticker on the window. Logan sat down in a booth, although since he was a regular the staff weren't expecting him to order anything.

Virgil was nervous. He had gotten lost on his way home, and was walking down to a cafe. He was hungry, after all. He looked at his phone, cringing at its dead battery. But he managed to smile. Today started off great, at least. Logan was.. his friend？Well, he seemed to begin to tolerate Virgil. And hes fine with that. He ordered a cup with a long list of ingredients. His own list of “Fuck me up” ingredients.

Logan didn't notice Virgil walking in. He had started dozing off in his seat when a waiter walked over, giving him a plate of eggs and toast. "It's on the house. You look like you could use it," they said with a smile as they left the table. They were right about that; Logan hadn't eaten all day. Logan glanced back over, guilt weighing down his shoulders as he began eating. He glanced over at his phone as he ate. The only reason it wasn't dead was because he was at the table with the outlet. That was basically His Table and both the visitors and staff knew this. Once Logan finished eating, he put his head atop his hand and began dozing off again. The poor kid hadn't slept well in ages.

The waitress did NOT look happy that Virgil had such a long list, but, he paid and ordered it, so she had to. When he asked for an outlet seat, he was pointed into Satan- I mean, Logans direction. “Oh, hi Logan.” Virgil said softly, holding his head phone.

Logan was partially asleep at the time, although he had trained himself to not fall asleep entirely, so when he heard his name he was immediately awake and alert. He put his arm down on the table as he looked at Virgil. "Hey," he said shortly, realizing that this was the kid from school, which meant school was over. Logan hadn't really been paying attention.

“Uh, Uhmm...” He felt really awakward.. Was there any other outlet booths？Logan looked like he would murder Virgil if he sat there.

Logan raised an eyebrow at Virgil, drumming his fingers against the table. Honestly, if there was anywhere that he was least likely to murder someone, it was that café. It was quite honestly the most comfortable place he had ever been in, and he wasn't about to throw that away by getting into a fight.

Virgil looked away. They say, if you look Logan in the eye, you’ll turn into stone. “Sorry. I’ll just take the bus.” Yes. The bus. That he has no.clue about. Tbh, If I were Virgil？I’d rather walk.

Logan stared at Virgil. What the hell was he talking about? "We don't have a bus." Did Virgil just move here? Also why was he talking about a bus inside a café? What the hell was his train of thought?

Transfer student. Yes, he did just move here. Thats.. Thats kinda why he wasnt as fearful of Logan. ”Oh.” He said simply. “Fu-”

Logan sighed in confusion as he looked away from Virgil, bringing up his hand again to set his head on and closing his eyes. He didn't have any sort of obligation to interact with Virgil, so if he wasn't going to actually say anything then Logan was going to try to stock up on light sleep.

“ck.” He sighed. He awkwardly shuffled into the booth, just wanting to charge his phone, man.

Logan opened his eyes again, having expected Virgil to just stand awkwardly or leave. He glanced at the coffee Virgil had as he sat down, reading the ingredient label. "That's incredibly unhealthy for you." Logan didn't know why he was starting conversation when he could be sleeping, but he was aware of how much Virgil's coffee could fuck someone up.

“Eh. Nobody really cares.” He took a sip, waiting for his phone to do him a favour and charge. One percent, and the most aggressive spam of messages blasts through his phone. “Oh. I’m popular today.” He muttered. Of course, his parents had guests today. They had to pretend they cared.

Logan watched the phone screen as the messages showed up on the screen. Honestly he was pretty surprised by the spam, he barely ever got any messages, and he definitely didn't remember the last time his mom texted him. She generally saved her barrage of harassment for when they were face-to-face. He genuinely didn't think whatever the messages were about could be good.

They werent. They were degrading messages about his intelligence. “Ah！My mom.. uh, says that.. I gotta go.. God, shes so kind.” He made a convincing act. “See you, Punk.” He gave him a pathethically weak smile. He had no way home. Sadness hours.

Logan didn't believe the act for a second. Everything he read on that screen were things he could practically hear his mother saying to him, and "kind" wasn't even the last word he'd use to describe her. Nonetheless, he understood the need to get home. Logan sighed at the smile. Honestly it was kind of sad. "You don't know where you're going, do you?" Logan asked, deadpan. Seeing how lost Virgil was in school, the entire town probably seemed like an actual maze to him.

Virgil flinched at the deadpan tone. “Ah, well, uhrm, yeah..” He muttered, allowing his bangs to cover his eyes. “I’ll find my way home, I dont need a gang member to escort me.” He muttered, a bit of a bitter tone in his voice. He doesnt know why he said that. Maybe to drive Logan away？But he adored Logan！Logan was so cool.. God damn, you stalker, stop thinking about him！ “...sorry.” He muttered, getting up.

Logan sighed and looked away. Gang member. Is that really how people saw him? He only meant to scare off jerks and bigots, and he honestly wanted to be supportive of basically anyone who got picked on or bullied. Apparently those people couldn't trust him either. He knew he couldn't be surprised though, nobody in their right mind would trust somebody who got so angry they had to punch a wall to feel just a little better. "Whatever," Logan muttered. "I just hope you know that everyone's gonna assume you're queer now." Logan jabbed a finger towards the pride flag sticker he had looked at on the way in.

The look of sheer terror as he saw the said flag was hilarious. He had tried his best to act like a straight guy. “I’m straight.” He mumbled. “Uhm, are you gay, Logan？”

Logan almost laughed at what was to him an obvious lie. Almost. "I think I'm as straight as you are." Straight as a rainbow, that is.

Virgil looked afraid. But then again, when hes with Logan... Wait. Beforehand, Virgil wasnt scared or worried. Aww！You turned someone who, rather blindly, trusted you, against you！But isnt that what you do best, Logan？

[stvrdazed]

honestly your post is the reason i stopped rping on tumblr and only do 1x1 on discord. i get to just chill and have a good time with my friends without the anons and the stupid rpts. like they make jokes about how, "why haven't we bullied abc for xyz reason?" ik they think they're justified bc of the reason but joking about bullying and actually fucking doing it is not fucking funny.

this might not even be what you're talking about lmfao idk i'm just over it honestly. all the posts about how you have to do your research and do everything absolutely fucking perfect is tiring and i'm over it. like i rp instead of writing a novel bc i'm fucking lazy and don't want to spend 287 hours researching every detail of a plot i want to write. and having to play fcs to the exact specifications of who they are in real life to the point where i'm like, am i just rping as this person now??? yeah like 1x1 where i get to do whatever the fuck i want without rpts whining about about little damn thing people do was the best choice i ever made. sorry this rant makes no sense lmfao i just... hate the tumnlr rpc lol here's my advice guys. go to jcink. go to discord. go LITERALLY ANYWHERE ELSE.

exactly! i agree whole heartedly. i’ve been roleplaying with my small group of friends on discord for a while along with a bit of 1x1 here and there. though, its just upsetting to come back to a platform that shaped you into the writer you are and find these fucking awful people.  roleplaying in a group is not worth the mental fuckery that some of these admins and members put you through. its a group. it’s a roleplaying GAME. admins are not some sort of hierarchy who can judge other people based on if they “like them” or not. some admins act as if they’re bigger than the entire group. it gets down to the idea that you have to devote your entire life just to write this one character because god forbid if you have to be absent for a week.  hiatuses exist, yeah. but i still just dont understand what gives these people the right to be so fucking awful. and you know, i’ll be the first to say it. i’m not innocent. sometimes you do things to fit in places and sometimes you do mean things. the difference is that people who are actually sorry and want to grow from their mistakes ADMIT it and apologize.  thank you so much for sending me this ask. it helped me get some more thoughts off my chest. i really hope you’re doing well and taking care of yourself through this shitty time. you can always rant in my ask box, nonnie. i know sometimes we just need to rant together.