#we could have seen her fall slowly towards becoming Anakin

[inquisitor-apologist]

Honestly I think the Kenobi show should’ve just. Been about Reva. She was the strongest part of the show, and I think that the narrative would’ve been a lot better if we got her full back story and perspective. Obi-Wan could’ve still been there, but Reva really should’ve been the main character

[tennessoui]

18 obikin!! Amnesia fics are super fun 🍆

18. One of them wakes up with amnesia (Option A because two people sent in this prompt number and I liked both ideas I saw for it enough to not want to pick) this involves an Obi-Wan that got deaged as well as lost his memories so he's Phantom Menace Obi-Wan. no i will not be explaining. hand wavey drabble fic writing.

--

The man has not stopped staring, but something in his intense gaze makes Obi-Wan feel safe. Almost. Well. On edge, yes, but. Protected. He has the strange feeling that he’d rather be under this man’s stare than anywhere else in the entire galaxy.

But he knows he’s never seen this man before in his life, the same way that he knows he’s twenty-five and that Qui-Gon Jinn is his Master, that he’s a Jedi knight-in-training, that he hates teas with mint leaves in them, that he’ll never say no to a drink with Quinlan, that--well.

He supposes none of that stuff could be true anymore. Vokra Che, who’s a grown and certified healer master now, had told him what had happened. An older version of himself had touched something he wasn’t supposed to. The closest translation they could find to the runes on the object was that it would transform the user back to their most balanced state. Obi-Wan’s had, apparently, been at the age of twenty-five. He hadn’t recognized the name Anakin Skywalker. He had never been to Naboo.

He throws the rest of his drink back and waves to the bartender to pour him another. He’d gone straight here from the Halls of Healing. He’d had a shadow the entire way, but the man has yet to try to talk to him at all. It’s infuriating.

His Padawan braid swings into his field of vision for a second. He tosses it over his shoulder. He’d been told. Qui-Gon had died. Obi-Wan wants to not think about it at all.

There’s a brush of a Force presence that’s both familiar and completely foreign next to him. The man has finally moved to his side. Obi-Wan’s jaw ticks at his continued reticence, the way he’s observing him but not talking to him. It just simply won’t do, but Obi-Wan isn’t feeling his kindest. He doesn’t want whatever this man is offering him with his silent, dour stares and his suffocating Force signature that keeps trying to tangle itself with Obi-Wan’s own. It’s rude is what it is.

He waves down the bartender and orders a drink for the man. “If you got mint, put it in,” he tells the woman who raises an eyebrow but shrugs, one pair of her arms busy with the drink. When she gives it to him he slides it to the man next to him without even looking at him.

“What--” the man asks. “I don’t--”

“You do tonight,” Obi-Wan says bracingly, throwing back half of his own drink. “We’ve both just lost our Masters, haven’t we?”

The man beside him flinches as if Obi-Wan had skewered him with his lightsaber.

“You are him, aren’t you?” Obi-Wan lolls his head to the side to look at the man threw half-closed eyes. “My padawan.”

“Anakin,” the man says so quietly it’s almost lost to the noise of the bar. “I’m Anakin Skywalker, yeah.”

Obi-Wan takes a drink reflexively, humming in disbelief. “You don’t look like it,” he says consideringly. At Anakin’s confused look, he elaborates. “You don’t look like you could have ever been a Padawan.”

The man pulls himself up, face darkening at the perceived slight. It’s almost too easy to rile him up, but now that he has, Obi-Wan finds he has no interest in fighting this man. Quite the opposite, really. That’s...something. He can’t tell if that emotion comes from him now or the older version of him.

Either way, Obi-Wan has no desire to stand in the way of whatever storm this Anakin is building up in his head, so he turns to face him completely and pushes both hands into his blond hair, raking down the scalp gently before collecting the strands into a poor imitation of the Padawan ponytail. “That’s better, I suppose. The hair threw me off.” He lets go slowly, making sure to tug at one of the strands at the last second.

Anakin has a very strange look on his face, but he’s definitely not angry anymore. He’s even shielding much more tightly now. Obi-Wan smirks into his glass as he takes a sip. He definitely remembers that trick.

“Do you know who cut it?” he asks, catching sight of the end of his braid again. The drinks are going to his head much more quickly than he had intended. Must be all the trauma his body has gone through in the past few days. “My braid.”

“I.” Anakin stutters, caught off guard. “You did.”

Obi-Wan feels like laughing but also a bit like crying. There’s a terrifying emotion rearing its head in his chest. It threatens to swallow him whole. “Well, I suppose I never liked to stand on ceremony.”

“You cut your braid in the fresher and then called me in and braided mine,” Anakin says distantly, as if caught up in the memory. “You wouldn’t let me hold it. I thought you were so mean. But I understood at my Knighting Ceremony. It was a part of me in my hand, a...starmap of all the places I’d been and the things I’d learned during my training. And there was only one person I wanted to give it to in the whole galaxy.”

“Did you?” He asks, taking a sip to hide how important the question is, how devastating the answer could be.

“Well. Yeah. But I guess I don’t know if you kept it,” Anakin cuts his eyes away from Obi-Wan’s and runs his fingers up the long stem of his drink.

Obi-Wan chokes on a laugh. “He definitely did.”

The other man’s face settles into a frown. “You don’t know that. You’re not him.”

“I’m enough of him. I’ve got--some feelings. In my head. Impressions.”

“Of me?”

“Of how he felt about you.”

Anakin’s eyes widen and then narrow with a sudden intensity that makes Obi-Wan want to shiver. It’s like being in the eye of a storm. His hold on the delicate glass in his hand becomes dangerously tight as he leans forward into Obi-Wan’s space, as if he can’t get close enough to him.

“What do you feel when you look at me?” he asks almost breathlessly. Obi-Wan blinks, trying to figure out if he’s being seduced or not. It’s sort of working. It’s all that focus, directly on him. Obi-Wan wouldn’t mind if that’s how the night ended. But sleeping with his former padawan who he can’t remember right now doesn’t seem like the best decision he could make.

But Anakin had liked it when Obi-Wan tugged at his hair. He’d arched closer to him. And now, the distance between them has been eaten away until they’re almost pressed chest to shoulder.

“Safe,” he decides to say, even though the word feels too small. “Sad,” which is mostly true but also an oversimplification. It’s a sort of nostalgia mixed with sadness, mixed with acceptance and resignation. “Warm,” because even after being denied entry to Obi-Wan’s mind, Anakin’s force presence has curled around Obi-Wan’s like some sort of krayt dragon, content to wait and guard and treasure. He leans forward, just until his mouth brushes against the skin of Anakin’s ear. “Coveted.”

Anakin definitely shifts at that, and when Obi-Wan pulls back enough to see his face, his pupils are blown wide.

Swallowing a grin, Obi-Wan swallows the rest of his drink in one go. “Drink up,” he tells Anakin in his most demanding tone, reaching into his pockets to pull out his older self’s credits to settle the tab. “I want to go.”

Anakin obeys immediately, making a face at the taste.

They’re out in the street within a few minutes, Anakin smacking his lips as if still trying to rid himself of the flavor. “I just don’t know why you had to order me that,” he complains, falling into step on Obi-Wan’s right.

Obi-Wan pauses and leans against the very unsanitary wall of the building, spreading his legs wide enough so that Anakin can come in between them. The man doesn’t seem to notice anything different, just steps a bit closer as a crowd of loud party-goers makes their way past them.

“I wanted to see if I liked mint,” Obi-Wan shrugs, raising his hand to rest on the skin of Anakin’s neck. He can feel the way his pulse is beating incredibly fast.

“Why would my drink help you with--”

Obi-Wan rolls his eyes. He commends his older self for being able to teach this idiot anything, even though he seems to have skipped over important lessons like Recognizing When You’re Being Flirted With.

Before Anakin can finish the thought, Obi-Wan twists his other hand in Anakin’s robes and pulls him forward until their lips are a hair’s breadth apart. “May I kiss you?” he asks because it’s only polite to.

Anakin’s eyes widen and then fall shut as he gives a little nod, finally stepping forward until their bodies are pressed completely together.

At least someone, although he doubts it was the older Obi-Wan, taught Anakin how to kiss. Obi-Wan’s toes curl in his boots as Anakin takes control of the action, moving his hands so one’s pressing against the wall behind them and one’s running up his scalp. Obi-Wan takes his time licking into Anakin’s mouth, allowing Anakin to explore him in return. One of them moans, which seems like as good a time as any to break the kiss.

“Well?” Anakin pants, diving in to place a short kiss onto Obi-Wan’s lips. “What do you think?”

The short answer is that Obi-Wan isn’t. He noses back towards Anakin’s mouth hopefully, sliding his hand down from his neck to rest on his hip.

“About mint,” Anakin elaborates when Obi-Wan doesn’t respond immediately.

“Inconclusive. Need more data,” Obi-Wan tries to kiss him but Anakin’s smiling too hard.

“Then next time you can get the awful drink, and you can get me the Alderaan Sunset,” Anakin is complaining, but he’s laughing too and that’s nice. Obi-Wan thinks that making Anakin Skywalker laugh is one of the best feelings in the galaxy, and he thinks his older self would agree, if the warmth sparking up in his very soul means anything at all.

[tommysparker]

Never Forget You [Chapter 3]

Obi-Wan Kenobi x Jedi!Reader

A/N: hey y’all! thank you for your patience with this chapter. enjoy!! :) [also totally didn’t have this in my drafts then forget to post earlier pfftttt whaaaatt?]

Warnings: angst with a tiny amount of fluff. anakin finally makes his debut in this series. it gets better just stay with me. long italic paragraphs = flashbacks

Anakin Skywalker had witnessed many things over the years. 

Giant beasts? At least once a week. Sith Lords? Becoming too common. Droid armies? All year long. Looking death in the eye? Simply another day in the life of a Jedi. 

Nothing could ever have prepared him for the sight he was currently witnessing. 

Obi-Wan Kenobi, his Master, The Negotiator, the Jedi Council’s most prized Jedi…sulking.

It has been a full week since You returned to the Jedi Temple and Anakin couldn’t help to think his former Master’s mood and your arrival were connected. He was vaguely aware of your past friendship, only hearing bits and pieces of the adventures you had together as Padawans. 

During his days under Obi-Wan’s apprenticeship he would often hear about how “a wise Jedi I once knew” would do certain things. He wanted to know more about this oh-so-great Jedi, however, any time the young boy asked his Master would always brush him off with a mournful look in his eyes.  

He didn’t understand at the time but now he’s beginning to piece together that perhaps there was something more between the two of you. 

“You think Master Y/l/n and Master Kenobi were courting?” 

“Keep your voice down, Snips,” Anakin hushed.

“Sorry, sorry. But Master,” Ahsoka lowers her voice, “what led you to that conclusion? I’ve hardly seen them together since Master Y/l/n came back. What makes you think they could be lovers?” 

“That’s just it, Ahoska. They’ve been avoiding each other like the Rakghoul plague. Obi-Wan told me they were such good friends, and now that they’re back they can’t stand to be in the same room as each other? I don’t buy it.” Anakin looked back to where Obi-Wan sat with Commander Cody, no doubt brainstorming new battle tactics and liberation plans. 

“So what do you suppose we do? Set them up or something?” The look her Master gave her made her regret her words the moment they left her mouth. 

“Come on, Snips. It’s a good idea. We get them to stay in the same room so they have no choice but to confront each other and talk things out! It’s genius.” Anakin smiled, his eyes still on his former Master. He had a feeling if Obi-Wan were to find out about this plan he would be in for a major lecture but he couldn’t bring himself to care at the moment. He couldn’t stand to see the old man look so miserable, not if he can do anything about it. 

Ahsoka crossed her arms and followed her Master’s gaze. Something was clearly different about her Grand-Master. He had put his full attention into ending the war, which wasn’t new. However, she could tell something was off. He no longer came out to the landing zone to greet returning fighters, stayed away from the meditation and training centers as well as the Jedi Archives which was the most off-putting observation considering that was where he spent most of his time.

Anytime someone needed to find Obi-Wan Kenobi, the first place they would check was the ancient history section of the Jedi Archives. 

“I don’t know why you find so much interest in these old books Y/n/n,” Obi-Wan complained from across the table. “Can’t we go practice our lightsaber skills instead?” 

You smiled. “Nuh uh, mister. If I won the wager you promised to sit with me during my reading time. Now shush, and read.” You pushed the unopened textbook toward the pouting Padawan. “Maybe you’ll actually learn something.” 

Obi-Wan stuck his tongue out in a childish manner, sighing dramatically when you gave him a certain look and reluctantly opened the cover and began to read Tales of The Old Republic. 

Safe to say from that point onward, Obi-Wan would join your daily Archive visits with zero complaints. 

You close the book, careful to make sure no pages fell out and gently push it back into its place on the shelf. Using the force, you carefully push the ladder you were currently standing on over to the next column and begin nitpicking through the array of old texts. 

It took a few days for you to settle in and readjust to the Jedi Temple life. Once you had, however, things quickly took a turn. 

Master Yoda requested that you help train some of the younglings who were having trouble advancing into the next stages of becoming a Jedi. In all honesty, you much rather have had the freedom to roam for at least one more week, but the new role presented an excuse to not be around a certain blue-eyed Jedi. 

“Looking for something?” 

The voice startled you, causing you to jump and lose your balance on the ladder. You yelp as you begin to fall towards the ground, bracing yourself for the hash impact and the bruises that would add to the collection on your side still currently healing.  

Instead, you feel a pair of arms catch you, one under your back and the other behind your knees in a classic bridal style. The hold felt secure instantly, and you instinctively clung to the tunic of your savior. You look up to thank the person for preventing any injuries, but the blue eyes staring back at you made your mind go blank. 

Obi-Wan stared back, unsure of what to say. This was the closest he has been to you since you left a decade ago. He longed to have you in his arms, to hug you, to regain that safety net you provided he knew he could always fall back on.

“Um...thank you, General.” It came out as more of a question, your mind still reeling from almost falling and also the fact that the man who you had been actively avoiding just happened to be in the same place you spent hours of your youth together. 

“Obi-Wan, please. No need for formalities, darling.” The old nickname slipped out, and he was about to apologize when he noticed the light blush that spread across your face. Perhaps not everything about you has changed. 

“Right...Obi-Wan. Well, I’ll be on my way then,” You rushed, trying to pass by him but he stopped you once again by the call of your name. 

“Y/n/n’s wait. Whatever game you’re playing, frankly I am not a fan of it.” Obi-Wan crossed his arms and furrowed his eyebrows. 

“What are you talking about?” You turned around and looked at him confused. 

“You were the one who summoned me here,” he stretched his arms out, “here I am and now you’re trying to run away again. I hardly think that’s fair.” He was beginning to get frustrated. He came in with his heart on his sleeve, ready to finally talk to you after so long and find out why you’ve been keeping your distance. Now, all he felt was betrayal and irritation at the ongoing dance you insist on doing around each other. 

He preferred to dance like you did in your youth, but alas this was nothing but another sign he needs to get mind out of the past.  

You scoffed lightly. “Again? What is that supposed to mean exactly?” You knew exactly what he meant, but you didn’t want to admit it. You’ve been denying it for ten years and Force be damned if you’d admit it now. 

“You’ve been avoiding me since your return--” You open your mouth to protest but he ignores you and continues “--and then you send the youngling to bring me here, only to try to flee upon my arrival,” He frowns, lifting his elbow and resting it on his remaining crossed arm. “I know our history can make things...difficult in the present time,” He glanced around cautiously as he spoke,”but I would appreciate it if we make an agreement simply to not speak from now on. No more games.” 

You blinked, head tilting slightly as you waited for him to finish. “Obi-Wan, I didn’t ask for you to come here. Nor would I ever involve younglings in personal matters.” He should know that, you thought. But should he really? 

His face fell from annoyance to embarrassment, his arms falling to his sides. “Oh.” He wasn’t sure what to do now. It was his own fault for getting his hopes up. I should have known better. 

You purse your lips and nodded slowly. “Well, I’m glad we at least came to an agreement. Goodbye, General Kenobi.” You took your leave, forcing yourself not to look back as you felt his eyes watching your figure. 

Obi-Wan let out a frustrated sigh, knowing he just ruined any and all changes of reconnecting with you. In his defense, however, you were the one avoiding his attempts at friendly conversation and refusing to meet and make up for lost time.  

Still, something didn’t feel right about this. 

“What the kriff was that?” 

Ah, there’s that something. “Anakin, please tell me this was not your doing.” 

Anakin smiled guilty, Ahsoka coming out from behind the bookshelf to stand next to her Master. 

“It was Snips' idea.” Anakin shrugged, flinching when he felt her punch his arm. “Ow!”

“You were the one who came up with the plan, and now look! Master Y/l/n and Master Kenobi will never get together--” Ahoska stops herself, realizing she said too much. “Oh no.” 

“I beg your pardon?” Obi-Wan looks at them both incredulously. “First of all, Master Y/l/n and I are simply…” he wanted to say friends, but even that was a reach at this point, “acquaintances. We knew each other in the past, and in the past our friendship shall stay. As for ‘getting together’, you both know very well any implication of that goes directly against the Jedi Code.” He crossed his arms tightly as he scolded. 

“I can tell you harbour feelings for them, Obi-Wan. You don’t need to lie to us.” 

“Whatever feelings I may or may not have for Y/n are unrelated. You must understand your responsibilities as a Jedi. No matter what emotional sacrifice we must make.” He made a point to look at Anakin at the end, knowing he won’t follow the implication but at least hoping he’ll get the message.     

“We’re sorry, Master.” Ahsoka looked down in shame not at what they had tried to achieve, but at the cost and clear damage they caused. 

Obi-Wan sighed, running a hand over his beard before resting it on her shoulder. “It’s alright young one. You meant no harm. Perhaps some things are better left forgotten.” 

Oh, if only it were that simple. 

A Padawan approached the three of them quickly. “Excuse me, Master Yoda sent me to tell you he and Master Y/l/n are waiting for you all in the council room.” 

Of course, these things never are. 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

heres a box to put your heart pieces in  -> []  :) 

Taglist: @queenariesofnarnia @dwarfplanet69 @katsukink @blondekel77 @generousrunawaydonut @fandomtrashwhore @fortheloveofaqueenfan @mrskenobi19 @mellowstatesmanhandsempath @hotleaf-juice @emiijemii @neji85 @doctor-warthrop @ayamenimthiriel @lizzy-95 @lovelylostminds 

[sonoftatooine]

Whumpay 2021

DAY 19: HOPE / DESPAIR

Finally, this one took ages

Characters: Padmé Amidala, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Anakin Skywalker

Warnings: Brainwashing

Summary: Winter Soldier AU - Jedi Knight Anakin Skywalker disappeared from the face of the Galaxy the day Palpatine executed Order 66. Padmé Amidala, however, managed to escape from Coruscant when the Empire was formed and became a founding member of the Rebellion. Several years later, when Obi-Wan Kenobi manages to capture the Emperor’s infamous Sith apprentice, Darth Vader, Padmé is left to deal with the horrifying discovery of what happened to her husband at the fall of the Republic.

***

“Are you sure you want to do this?”

Padmé Amidala, former Senator of Naboo and member of the High Council of the Rebel Alliance, frowned down at the screen displaying the flickering vid feed of her lost husband in the room adjacent to the high security—or as high security as their current base could afford them—cell in which he was being held.  She had been stood there for at least ten minutes, hovering, waiting, and in all of that time, Anakin had not so much as twitched—so much so that she might have been fooled into thinking that she was looking at a still image if not for the rise and fall of his chest and the occasional blink. It was so unlike him—her restless husband, always on the move, but who had always come back to her until the day that he didn't—that it made her eyes burn with the effort to hold back tears. This was wrong, so wrong—

“Yes, Obi-Wan, I'm sure” she said once she was sure she could bite back the sharp reply that was on the tip of her tongue that the man beside her didn't at all deserve. Of course she was sure. How could she not be sure, when this was her husband—the man she loved with all the force of a thousand stars—at stake? She had to.

“You don't have to, Padmé.” Stood beside her, arms folded over his chest, and tired blue eyes fixed as unrelentingly on Anakin's frozen figure as her own, Obi-Wan Kenobi sighed, his mouth curved downwards in an unhappy line. Grief had aged him badly since the horrors of Order 66 and the beginnings of Palpatine's Empire. There were new lines around his eyes, and his auburn hair was fast turning white, but the change over those years was not nearly as stark as that which had been wrought upon him over the past few days. He looked raw and worn down, no matter how he tried to disguise it with his regular stoicism, as if he was on the verge of being swallowed by despair. Ever since the Empire had come for him on his last mission. Ever since they had managed to capture the Emperor's enforcer, Darth Vader.

Vader. Lord Vader. The name sent a shiver of horror through her, but not for the reasons that it once had. Before, she had known him simply as the latest in what seemed to be Darth Sidious' ever replenishing supply of Sith apprentices, and one of the most troubling additions to the Empire's ranks. Robed and masked entirely in black, without even the slightest indication to what lay beneath his impenetrable disguise, he had been a complete unknown to all but Palpatine himself—Empire and Rebellion alike—save for the brutal efficiency with which he carried out his duties. They had watched the Emperor's transmission introducing him to the Galaxy—her and Obi-Wan and Bail, while Luke and Leia slept soundly in their cribs watched over by Threepio and Artoo—from their bunker about a year after the Empire was formed. Padmé remembered seeing him, standing tall and motionless, three steps behind his master, and had felt a frisson of fear and misery run through her that she hadn't quite understood at the time.

She understood now. Oh Force, she thought as the image of Anakin, swamped in black robes and strapped, unconscious, to a gurney, and Obi-Wan's anguished look as he gasped out “he doesn't remember us; he doesn't even remember who he is”, swam through her mind. Oh Force, she understood now.

“Yes, I do,” she said, with a nod that looked far more decisive than she felt. She clutched the pile of warm cloaks and blankets that she had brought with her tight to her chest. Anakin had always hated the cold, and she couldn't bear the thought of him all alone in that cell without at least making sure he was as comfortable as possible. “He's my husband. I want to see him.”

She wanted to see him ever since they had brought him off the ship, ever since she had been dragged away from Coruscant by a harried Obi-Wan and Bail, crying and begging for them to take her back, that they needed to find Anakin, they couldn't leave him there. Anakin who she had last seen standing to the right of the Chancellor during the meeting of the Delegation of the 2000, hands bundled into the voluminous sleeves of his Jedi robes and not quite able to meet her eyes. Who had been sent by the Council to report to Palpatine the day of Order 66, and had never been seen since.

Until now.

“Padmé, he tried to attack me when I went to talk to him,” Obi-Wan reminded her grimly. “Ahsoka too. He doesn't remember any of us. All he knows is what Sidious has made him believe. What if he hurts you?”

Padmé shook his head.

“He won't hurt me” she whispered. He wouldn't hurt her. Anakin would never— But she didn't think he could ever have tried to hurt Obi-Wan either. Or Ahsoka. But he didn't remember any of them, because Sidious had taken him and forced him to forget everything, turned him into his weapon— She was shaking, full of rage and grief, but she pushed them both down. It was alright now. It would have to be alright. He was with the Rebellion now and they would heal him of whatever vile Sith had done to him and then he could meet their two precious children and everything would be alright—

“Padmé.” She thought, faintly, that Obi-Wan had managed to hone saying her name in a tone of utmost exasperation and frustration to a fine art. No doubt Anakin had given him a great deal of practice in the past. “He's not the Anakin we know. Not anymore.”

This time, it took a great deal more effort for her to swallow her harsh retort. Obi-Wan had given up hope a long time ago—the night of Order 66 when his bond to Anakin had snapped. He had thought him dead, and blamed himself for it—the Council had pushed him into spying on Palpatine, he had said, and he was sure that Anakin had discovered the man's secret and been killed for it. She remembered how he had looked, blurred through her tears as they rushed through hyperspace away from Coruscant—dishevelled and worn, the telltale signs of his battle with Grievous burnt into his Jedi robes, and a haunted look in his eyes, misted up with tears that he refused to let fall. He had come back from his last visit to Anakin's cell much the same, convinced that his old padawan had died with whatever it was that Palpatine had put him through, that what was left was nothing but a shell of the man he had loved as a brother.

(It still hadn't stopped him from abruptly ending a call with Yoda when the old Jedi Grandmaster had suggested “lost to the Dark, young Skywalker is; let him go, you should”.)

“I don't believe that,” she said. She had never believed Anakin to be dead. Refused to believe it, told Luke and Leia all sorts of stories about their brave and dashing father that she saw so much of in each of them, hoping beyond hope that one day he would be there to share his own stories with them. She wasn't about to give up now, when he was here—finally here, in front of her, no matter how changed, and no matter what Jedi platitudes about letting go she heard. “We can save him. I know we can.”

She turned her pleading gaze to Obi-Wan, but he refused to meet her eyes. He was still staring at the screen, and though his expression was blank, she could see the longing in his gaze—longing and fear. Fear that he would get his hopes up when nothing could be done. Fear that she would get hurt trying. Padmé sighed sadly. Obi-Wan may have given up hope, but she wasn't about to let him fall into despair.

“Obi-Wan, you'll be here the whole time,” she said, softly, soothingly. “I have faith that you'll protect me, if need be.”

Obi-Wan scowled, finally turning to look at her, but there was a hint of something gentle and fond beneath it.

“The pair of you will be the death of me” he sighed. It was barely a ghost of how he had been before, when they had all been together and happy and none of them had been brainwashed into becoming a Sith, but it was familiar enough that Padmé couldn't help but send him a watery smile.

“Please, Obi-Wan, I'm ready.”

Reluctantly, Obi-Wan nodded.

“I'll be just on the other side of the door.”

Despite her words, Padmé's heart felt like it might burst out of her chest as she stepped into Anakin's cell, the pneumatic hiss of the door closing behind her reverberating in her ears like a threat. She was not afraid. At least, she was not afraid of the figure sitting, head bowed, on the little cot in front of her—he had not attacked any of his visitors since the two Jedi; indeed, had barely acknowledged them, enough so that the High Council had deemed it as safe as it would ever be for her to see him—but she was afraid of what would happen next. Of what she would learn from this meeting. Of looking into her husband's eyes and finding him unrecognisable. But Padmé was never one to shy away from things that made her afraid, and so she took a deep breath, and murmured:—

“Anakin.”

No response.

“I brought these.” She gestured to the robes and blankets in her arms. “I thought you might be cold.”

That got a reaction from him. Slowly, jerkily, as if his head were being lifted up by a string, he turned his face towards her. The sight of him made her want to scream—scream and cry and hold him in her arms and never let go. He looked sick and gaunt, and the change from golden tan to waxy white looked even more stark under the bright lights of the cell, the circles under his eyes dark like bruises. And his eyes, oh his eyes. The sparkling blue that she remembered—had loved and missed so much for all that she saw it every day in the face of their son—had been replaced with the same horrible yellow that she had seen deep set in the sunken face of Emperor Palpatine, gleaming cruelly under the shadow of his hood, during Empire Day transmissions. But that wasn't even the worst of it. Anakin's eyes had always been so expressive, brimming with love and joy and fear and anger and grief, as if he felt too much and too deeply to keep it all inside. It was one of the things that she loved about him. Now, however, he turned those sickly eyes to her and she saw nothing in them but blankness. For the first time in his life, Anakin Skywalker looked upon her and he felt nothing.

Padmé swallowed, fighting back the urge to cry. She wanted to run to him, bury her fingers in his hair and press her lips to his as she used to do each time he came home to her from the war, but, with what felt like a monumental effort, she pushed the desire away. That wasn't what Anakin needed right now, no matter how much she wanted it. Instead, she waited for him to reply, waited for some sort of acknowledgement—anything to indicate what she should do, what she should say.

None came.

She sighed. Stepping forward, she leaned down and placed the pile of clothes next to him on the bed, trying to keep her heart from shattering into a thousand pieces at the tiny flinch he gave as she approached him. Carefully, so as not to startle him, she pulled back, coming to a stop once she was far enough away for him to relax minutely. Hot tears burnt at her eyes.

“Do you know who I am?” she asked, wishing that her voice did not sound so shaky, so thick with emotion. Anakin had always had a way of bringing out absolute honesty in her—even when she didn't even know she was trying to hide something—and now, confronted with her husband whom she hadn't seen in years, and who had spent every day of those long years suffering under the man who had enslaved the entire Galaxy to his will, all her politician's training, all her masks and airs had fled her. Even if she had wanted to, she couldn't have done a thing to hide her feelings from him.

Anakin frowned.

“You are Padmé Amidala,” he answered tonelessly. His voice was as dead and as flat as the look in his eyes. He sounded hoarse and tired, like he used to after waking up from a particularly bad nightmare. Like he had when he had when he had dreamt of her death in childbirth, only a week before he had disappeared, before she had run and left him— “One of the founders of the Rebellion.”

“That's right,” she said, with a nod that she wasn't sure was meant to encourage him or herself. “Do you— Is there anything else you remember about me?”

She knew it would be no. She knew he remembered nothing. But she wanted so badly for him to remember at least something of her. Wanted to know that Sidious hadn't taken everything from him. No matter what she wanted, though, she knew what his answer would be. Knew it and feared it.

“I understand that it's more usual for an interrogator to ask their prisoner for information,” Anakin replied. He tilted his head to the side, the expression on his face somewhere between confused and wary. “Not questions about themselves.”

He didn't sound like Anakin. Or rather, he sounded like Anakin—his voice sounded like Anakin, but the words, said in that flat, dull tone— It was wrong, all wrong. Oh my love, Padmé thought. My love, what has that monster done to you?

“I'm not interrogating you, Anakin” she said. She fought keep her voice steady and calm, even as she wanted nothing more than to burst into tears. Anakin's frown deepened, a look of suspicion flitting across his face.

“Why does everyone keep calling me that?” he asked, and for the first time, there seemed to be a hint of something else in his flat tone, a hint of uncertainty, of apprehension. His hands twitched, like he wanted to twist his fingers together like he used to do beneath the sleeves of his Jedi robes when he was nervous. Instead, he balled them tight into fists.

Padmé sent him a watery smile.

“It's your name, Ani.”

My Ani, she thought, watching him twitch oddly at the contraction of his name, turning sharply away. Her Ani who didn't even remember his own name. Oh, what was she going to do. How could she help him when he remembered nothing—nothing about his friends, nothing about her, nothing about himself—and they didn't even know what it was that Palpatine had done to him to cause this? She felt despair rushing in on her like a shark that had scented blood in the water, but she pushed back against it. She couldn't given in now. For Anakin's sake, she couldn't give up hope.

“How much has Obi-Wan told you?” she asked carefully. It was a risk mentioning Obi-Wan—a Jedi, a man he had ostensibly been sent to kill before the Rebellion had captured him—but she needed to know how much he had actually taken in.

Yellow eyes flicked back to her, the wariness and suspicion turning his expression even more closed off and guarded than it had been before.

“He told me I was once his Jedi apprentice,” he replied. “But I suppose you'll claim that I was your closest friend in the Senate. Or have you had the chance to corroborate your stories since Kenobi's last visit?”

The harshness of his words—as much as their content—made it all the harder to hold back her tears. Anakin had hardly ever spoken to her like that, was hardly ever sharp with her. Around her, perhaps, when he was particularly upset or frustrated, but rarely with her. It was yet another reminder of what had been done to him—the changes Sidious had forced upon him, as if he were nothing but a droid to be reprogrammed according to an owner's desire. Well, she would fix it, she would help him, and she would never let that vile man near him again. But to do that, she would have to get him to believe her, and for him to believe her, she—

“I'm not lying to you,” she insisted. “I promise you. It's Palpatine—Sidious—who has lied to you. You were a Jedi—have been since you were nine years old. Near the end of the war, the Council was concerned about the powers Palpatine had gathered for himself and sent you to report on him. But you— They sent you to his office the day he ordered the Jedi killed and then you disappeared. The Jedi thought you were dead, but he took you and he did something to you and you don't remember it because—”

“No.”

The sharp growl silenced her rambling mid-sentence. Her mouth clicked shut and her eyes widened as Anakin stood abruptly from the bed, his expression as hard as durasteel. Padmé swallowed, a flicker of nervousness fluttering in her stomach that she ruthlessly pushed down. She wondered if Obi-Wan was getting ready to dash into the cell from the other side of the door, afraid that he was about to attack her. But she refused to share that fear. She had never been afraid of Anakin, and she never would.

“No,” Anakin repeated, more softly this time. Instead of starting towards her, he prowled away to the far corner of the cell, back not quite turned to her—just enough to keep her in his line of sight—and hunched in on himself, arms crossed defensively across his chest. It was such a familiar gesture that, despite herself, Padmé couldn't help but feel a sliver of relief at the sight of it. Whatever Sidious had done to him, he hadn't managed to chase every last part of him from his mind. “My master warned me about this,” he muttered, more to himself than to her. “He told me that you would try to deceive me, turn me against him—”

“He's the one deceiving you!,” she cried, trying to ignore worm of uneasiness in her stomach at the thought of the Emperor warning her husband against the Jedi and the Rebellion—or perhaps her specifically. If she could just get him to see, just get him to believe— “I don't know what he's done to you but please, Anakin, all we want is to help you. All I want is to help you. But to help you, I need you to believe me—”

She approached him, slowly, cautiously, as one might a wounded animal. His gaze fixed on her the whole way, wary, unrelenting, but he did not move, frozen to the spot. She itched to reach out to him, to pull him in and hold him close, but she wrestled the urge down to the depths of her heart.

“Please, Ani,” she begged, barely a whisper. “Please.”

Anakin stared down at her, and for a moment, she thought she saw a flash of blue in those yellow eyes.

“You haven't told me who you are,” he said, after a long moment of silence. His tone was guarded, cautious, just as quiet as her own. “Who you were to me. If what you say is true, what did I mean to you?”

Everything, Padmé thought. You meant everything to me. You mean everything to me. You and Luke and Leia. And one day, I'll be able to have them meet their father and you'll mean everything to them too. Her heart, too full of love and fear and hope and despair, ached in her chest, snatching up all her words before they could reach her mouth. How could she say all of this to him? How could she say any of this to him, when he barely believed she was telling him the truth about his name?

“You're—”

She faltered, unsure what to do. Would it be too much for him, finding out that he was married to a woman he didn't even remember? But what could she say? She couldn't lie to him—wouldn't lie to him. She wanted him to trust her again, like he used to before everything had gone so wrong, and how could they ever help him if they too deceived him?

“I'm...I...I'm your wife.”

Anakin froze stock still.

“...What?” he whispered hoarsely.

“It's true.” Padmé could no longer stop herself. She reached out slowly with both hands, making to smooth down his hair—it had always calmed him down after a nightmare; maybe if he accepted the truth, it might soothe him a little now? He gave an odd little jerk at the contact, his tongue darting out nervously to wet his lips, but he didn't pull away, still frozen to the spot, staring down at her with wide eyes. “Please believe me. It's true. I'm your wife—”

“No,” Anakin cut across her again. This time, however, his eyes had not hardened, and he could see the uncertainty creeping into them. His voice shook. “No, you're a liar.”

His hand—the one of durasteel that she had held at their wedding after he lost it to Count Dooku—darted up to snatch her wrist. But instead of shoving her right away, he held her in place, her hand hovering between them, arm extended towards him, as if he could not decide whether to push her aside or pull her closer. Padmé stared into his eyes, vaguely aware that Obi-Wan was probably panicking by now on the other side of the door. She could feel the strength in his grip, well acquainted with what his mechno hand could do. He had been horribly embarrassed when he had managed to crush several of her cups after their wedding, still unused to the amount of force his prosthetic required compared to his flesh hand. If he wanted to, he could tighten his grip now and crush her just as he had those cups, shatter every bone in her wrist. But he did not press down. He didn't even so much as grip hard enough to bruise.

“I'm not,” she cried—really cried, the tears she had been holding back starting to trickle down her cheeks. “I swear to you—”

“You didn't corroborate your stories after all,” Anakin retorted. “I could hardly have been a Jedi and a husband.”

Padmé shook her head, blinking heavily to keep the tears from blurring her vision. It would be alright, she told herself. She could persuade him. His voice was not nearly so certain as his words, and if she could just explain properly—

“You broke the Code to marry me,” she said. “We kept it secret, so you could stay as a Jedi and I could keep serving in the Senate until the war was over—”

“How convenient” Anakin returned, perhaps not as derisively as he had intended. He still hadn't let go of her wrist.

Padmé shook her head again, more insistently this time. She reached once more with her free hand to cradle his cheek in his palm.

“Please, Anakin, please. I love you. I love—”

“No!” With a cry, Anakin jerked backwards. The durasteel fingers wrapped about her wrist pulled away. “No! You—”

But words seemed to be beyond him. He staggered back, hand shooting out to steady himself against the wall, but it wasn't enough. His legs failed him, and he sank down to the floor, forehead pressed to his knees, trembling violently.

“This isn't—,” he hissed. “You can't— It's a trick. It's a trick—”

His hands fisted in his hair, so tight that Padmé thought he might tear clumps of it out. She rushed to his side, wiping her tears away furiously with her sleeve. She had pushed him too far. It was too much for him—too much at once.

“Padmé.”

Anakin's head shot up just as Padmé turned around to see Obi-Wan standing in the doorway, trying to remain impassive and failing miserably. She caught a flurry of movement in the corner of her eyes—Anakin had forced himself to stand back up, pressed up against the wall. He looked like a cornered loth-wolf, hunched in on himself, ready to spring, his yellow eyes wide and feral.

“It's alright,” Obi-Wan soothed, holding up the palms of his hands to show him he wasn't armed. Despite the calmness of his tone, Padmé could hear the agony beneath his words. “I won't hurt you. We will leave you to rest now.”

He turned a significant glance towards her, and Padmé could do nothing but nod, for all that she wanted to stay. She didn't want to overwhelm Anakin any more than she had already. Swallowing thickly, she forced down her tears, turning to meet her husband's unnatural yellow eyes with her own glistening brown.

“I'm sorry,” she whispered. “I'm so sorry.”

She made it to the other side of the door before she broke down in tears.

(Later, when she came to check on him to find him curled up in the warm robe she'd brought him, she cried for very different reasons).

[ddaeng-danvers]

lake house

pairing: anakin skywalker x reader

genre: fluff

summary: in which anakin doesn’t turn to the dark side and padme gives you a lake house

warnings: canon-typical violence, death, pregnancy 

word count: 2610

a/n: i literally did this in one sitting bc i’m stupid and it’s so bad, so please do not expect a masterpiece,, for reference this is the nightgown i refer to at the end ----,, also this was slightly inspired by an ask i sent to @etherealsanakin the other day so here is that -----

masterlist

Anakin had been staring out the window of the Council room for what felt like hours, but you were sure was only a few minutes. His gaze was strong and hard. It wouldn’t take a force-wielder to understand something was on his mind. You knew he’d been agitated since his placement on the Council without becoming a master, but you knew there was more to this story. You held your tongue until you saw a single tear roll down the side of his face. 

“Ani, my love what is bothering you?” You crouched down next to his seat and wrapped his hand in your own. He squeezed your hand. 

“The Chancellor, he’s,” He closed his eyes and took in a shaky breath. “He’s the Sith Lord.” You let silence fill the room, before placing a chaste kiss on your and Anakin’s entwined hands. 

“Have you told anyone? Anyone on the Council?” Anakin nodded ever so slightly. 

“I informed Master Windu, and he told me to stay behind. That he would handle it.” He closed his eyes for a moment as if to better gather his thoughts. “I’m feeling, confused. I’m not sure of my place in all this.” 

“I’m not sure I understand what you mean, Ani. Are you talking about the Order?” Anakin pulled his hand away from yours and pressed his palms to his face. 

“The Chancellor promised me powers. Powers greater than any Jedi has ever possessed. The power to save you, from whatever it is I keep dreaming about.” Everything slowly started to click into place. Asking Anakin to be his representative on the Council. The nightmares and visions. Why no Jedi could sense a Sith Lord right under their noses. It was all the Chancellor’s manipulation. All of it. You stood up from your crouched position and stood in front of Anakin. You brought your hands to either side of his face and touched your foreheads together. 

“My love, I need you to listen to me right now. And I need you to trust me. Can you do that?” Anakin smiled and his eyes curled up, sending a few stray tears down his face

“I always trust you.” Your heart warmed at his confession.

“I know you feel conflicted right now. You aren’t sure where your alliances truly lie.” Anakin nodded as if answering the question. “But if the Chancellor is a Sith Lord like you’ve said, he’s been manipulating you. Anakin, he wants you to join the dark side, and I know that’s not what you want. I know that’s not who you are.” Anakin stays silent, waiting for you to continue. “I have my criticisms of the Order, just as you do, but they want the best for you, I promise.” You place a kiss on the top of Anakin’s head. “I love you. I love you so much that I won’t let the Chancellor make you the man you’re not.” Anakin stands up from his seat and turns to look out the window. 

“I love you too, Y/N. I-I just don’t want to lose you. I can’t” 

“And you won’t. I’m right here.” You bring his hands to your cheeks. “I’m not leaving you.”

“I want to aid Master Windu,” Anakin admits. 

“Then let’s go.” Anakin smiles up at you and grabs your hand. You both run from the Council room to the hanger, and grab a ship to fit both of you. The journey is short. As soon as you land, you both jump out and begin running towards the Chancellor’s office. While running, your each out for Anakin’s hand and grab it. “I’m not gonna lose you Ani.” Anakin looks at you, his expression still serious.

He simply says, “You won’t.” Before you knew it, you ran into the Chancellor’s office. The window had been shattered and blown out. Master Windu held his lightsaber to the Chancellor’s throat. The Chancellor was laying in front of Master Windu, his hands up in “peace”. 

“You are under arrest, my lord.” Master Windu proclaimed. You and Anakin have released hands since entering the room but chose to remain close. 

“Anakin, I told you it would come to this.” Anakin looked down at the Chancellor. A man he thought he could rely on, a man he thought he could trust. A man that turned out to be a liar. “I was right. The Jedi are taking over.” 

“You are mistaken, Chancellor!” You exclaim.

“The oppression of the Sith will never return. You have lost.” Master Windu adds. 

“No, no. You have lost!” The Chancellor yells as he shoots force lightning towards you and  Master Windu. The lightning strikes you before you have a chance to ignite your lightsaber. You fall to the ground, and attempt to hold out. Anakin stands there, confused and conflicted yet again. All of his senses are overwhelming him. He trusts you, with his life. But the Chancellor had promised him the power to save you, and he couldn’t afford to lose you.

“Anakin!” You yell over the noise. You cannot hold out much longer, the Chancellor is too powerful. “He is lying to you, Anakin. He can’t help you!” Moments later, the Chancellor shouts out a response, still shooting out lightning. You are writhing on the floor. 

“I have the power to save the one you love!” Ironic, Anakin thinks, as he’s shocking you with lightning. “You must choose!” 

“Don’t listen to him Anakin!” Master Windu shouts out. You can barely hear what’s going on, too focused on keeping yourself conscious. The pain suddenly stops, and you try to pull yourself off the ground. Anakin leans down and helps you to your feet. You pull away from him as he pulls out his lightsaber. 

“I trusted you, Chancellor! I trusted you, and all you did was lie!” Master Windu stepped aside slightly as if he knew what was to come. “You’ve done nothing but lie. And you hurt the one I love.” With that, Anakin swung his lightsaber and struck the Chancellor. And the Clone War was over. 

---

Immediately following the Chancellor’s death, Master Windu sent you and Anakin to the med bay to treat your injuries. They were relatively minimal, considering the nature of the attack. Anakin stayed with you the whole time, he refused to leave your side. You suspected he blamed himself for waiting so long to step in. 

“My love I know what you’re thinking. This isn’t your fault.” Anakin looked at the floor and shook his head. 

“I let it go on for far too long, love. I shouldn’t have just let you lay there on the-” 

“Anakin.” You interrupted. “You killed the Chancellor, you resisted his manipulation. The war is practically over.” Anakin squeezed your hand. 

“You flatter me, Y/N.” The medical droid spoke up, reminding you of its presence. 

“Y/N suffered minor burns and will make a full recovery. 

“Thank you, 2-1B.” The droid held up its hand as if it had more to say. 

“However, during the scan, I have found the Y/N is pregnant.” You feel your heart sink to your stomach. Was the baby okay? Had anything happened to it when you were attacked?

“Is the baby alright” Anakin spoke up. 

“Yes, the baby is healthy.” 2-1B responded. You stood off of the bed and moved next to Anakin. He looked at your face before moving his gaze down to your stomach. 

“My love, this, this is wonderful.” Anakin envelops you in a hug, squeezing you ever-so-slightly. “And the war is ending, this is perfect timing.” Anakin’s smile seems to increase tenfold with every passing second. 

“Anakin, we’re still Jedi. What’re we gonna do?” Anakin smooths down the back of your hair and runs it between his fingers. “We’re not gonna worry about anything right now. All right?” You nod. “This is a happy moment. The happiest moment of my life.” 

---

In the weeks that followed, Jedi and their platoons were sent to resolve any remaining conflicts. Luckily, the Council, recognizing your and Anakin’s efforts that ended the war, were absolved from duty. 

Padme visited after the final negotiations concluded, and the treaty was signed. At this point, you were only a month or so along, and still found it easy to hide it from others. However, you’d spoken with Anakin the other night about plans for the future. What were you going to do when you couldn’t hide it. And clearly, you’d both broken the Code. You both came to the conclusion that your best bet would be asking Padme, a trusted friend if you could use her planet as a refuge.

“Padme!” You exclaimed as you opened the door to your quarters. You both gathered each other in a hug, having not seen each other since the Chancellor’s death. As you separated, you invited her in. You took a seat on your bed, as she gave Anakin a brief hug before sitting down. 

“How have you both been?” Padme asked. She looked concerned. It’s clear she’d been worried since hearing about the nature of the Chancellor’s death. 

“We’ve been doing well. Actually-”

“Y/N���s pregnant.” Anakin blurted out. As much as you were annoyed that he spoiled the announcement, you couldn’t be mad at the lovestruck expression on his face. 

“Congratulations!” Padme stood up to give you another hug. Anakin stood up as well and placed a comforting hand on your back as you and Padme separated. “Is there anything I can do?”

“Yes, actually.” Padme looks at you, ready to listen. “The Order prohibits attachments, which clearly we have not abided by.” Anakin laughs softly. “So, as things become more obvious, we’re going to need somewhere to stay. We wondering if-”

“Of course you can come to Naboo!” Padme interrupts. “You two are always welcome. You can stay in one of my family’s lake houses, we don’t have much use for them anyway.” 

“Thank you, Padme, truly.” 

---

Eventually, it was time to present your situation to the Council. You and Anakin had decided to leave the Order so you could raise your family in peace. You had had enough fighting for a lifetime. You never wanted to become a General in the first place, but the war threw many of your plans out the window. 

The only Council member who knew of your situation was Obi-Wan, who was incredibly accepting (and also very excited to be an Uncle). He promised to do as much as possible to lessen any consequences given by the Council. 

Anakin grabbed your hand and pressed a kiss to your knuckles before you entered the room. “Everything will be okay, my love.” As you stepped into the room, you were met with the many faces of the Council. The Masters that raised you, trained you. You owed your life to these individuals, and it would be difficult to part with them. 

“Master Skywalker, Master Y/L/N,” Master Yoda begins. “A request for us, you have?” 

“Yes Master Yoda,” Anakin begins. “If I may be blunt, Y/N is with a child.” Several Council members made audible expressions of surprise, but many also looked as if Anakin had made the most obvious statement in the galaxy. 

“You really think we weren’t aware of your attachment?” Master Windu chuckled. “The pregnancy, however, is a surprise.” Master Windu looks around at the members, who all nod their heads. “But we are willing to excuse this ignorance of the Code because of all you two have done for the order.” 

“Thank you, Master Windu, but Anakin and I were planning on leaving the order to raise the child.” Many members begin to whisper among themselves. 

“Many we ask why?” Shakk Ti, your former master asks.

“Master Ti, I think we’ve all had enough fighting for a lifetime.” Many members smile and chuckle at your comment. “I own the Jedi Order my life. But I am ready for another chapter of my life.” 

“Granted, your request is.” Master Yoda replies. 

---

You, Anakin, and Padme head to Naboo only a few days later, and Obi-Wan is there to send you off. 

“You must send me holo-vids once the baby is born. I’m not sure how often I will be able to visit.” 

“Of course, Master. We wouldn’t let you miss anything.” Anakin smiles.

Obi-Wan pulls you into a hug. “I wish you the best of luck, Y/N. I remember when you 

were just a youngling, and look at you now.” Obi-Wan’s memory makes you smile. Some of your earliest memories were of the older padawans playing with you and your youngling clan in the Creche. It’s sweet to know Obi-Wan was one of those padawans. 

“Thank you, Master Kenobi.” You look up to Anakin. “I’ll be with Padme, I’ll let you two say goodbye.” Anakin looks at his former master for but a moment before wrapping him up in a hug. 

“Thank you, master. I’ve never thanked you enough for putting up with me all these years.” Obi-Wan chuckles. 

“It was a pleasure, Anakin. It was a pleasure and an honor to train you. And I wish you well. Take care of her.” 

“I plan on it.” With that, Anakin boards the ship to Naboo with you and Padme. 

--

Upon landing, Padme excitedly shows you around the house her family is gifting you. The house is modest. A few bedrooms, a couple of refreshers, the perfect home for the (growing) family moving in. 

“We can’t thank you enough, Padme.” 

“It’s really no problem, let me know if there is anything else you need. I’m just a holo-call away.” With that, Padme left you two alone. You continued to move about the house. With what little possession you and Anakin had, there wasn’t much to decorate, you hoped that would change over time. You eventually ended up in your and Anakin’s room. It wasn’t much, but it was yours, and that’s all that mattered. However, when you opened the closet, you found it fully stocked. You’d always admired Padme’s gowns, and it seems she left you some of your own. One, in particular, struck your eye. A blue silk nightgown with pearls at the neckline. You slip in on, thankful to be out of your Jedi robes for one of the first times in your life. 

You make your way out onto the balcony overlooking the lake. Anakin is already there watching the sunset. He senses your presence and turns around. 

“Love, what are you wearing?” He asks, a smirk rising on his face. Anakin holds out his hand and pulls you to him. He looks from your eyes to your lips and kisses you. 

“Padme left all kinds of things in the closet. I thought I’d try one on.” Anakin smiles. 

“I’ll be sure to give Padme my thanks.” Anakin pulls you in closer and kisses you harder. He eventually pulls away to breathe. The happiness on his face is contagious. 

“You look happy, my love.” Anakin lays his forehead against yours. 

“It’s because I am, love. Maker, I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. We’re here, together, and the baby will be able to grow up here.” Anakin places his hands on your stomach, and his expression changes quickly. 

“What is it love, is something wrong?” His expression of surprise changes to one of content. 

“Nothing it wrong, Y/N. I’m not a med droid but I think I sense two force presences in there.”

“Two? Two as in-”

“Twins, yes, twins! Twins Y/N!” Anakin picks you up and practically spins you before setting you down and embracing you again. “I love you so much, Y/N.”

“I love you too, Anakin.”

[queenofspades6]

More than Partners- The Mandalorian x reader

Not a Jedi Anymore

Chapter 12 of More than Partners

———

Summary: Ahsoka Tano is scared that you’ll fall to the Dark Side by loving the Mandalorian. You are trying to find who you are without the Force, and especially who you want to be?

Warnings: Spoilers of episode 5 season 2 of the Mandalorian. Mentions of clone wars. Anakin Skywalker And Darth Vader

AN: Heyyy! I am very early but I really wanted to post it early for you guys!! I’ll definitely be back every Monday to post another chapter! I have so many ideas for this fanfic. It’s gonna be wonderfullll! I love seeing how reader has changed over the chapters and how independent she tries to become, Jedi or not. I also want to focus on Mando, to see how all along the chapters, he cares more, and more and becomes all caring and protective. Tell me if you want to be tagged in the comments and don’t forget to like, share, and comment, helps me stay motivated for you guys!

A NEW CHAPTER IS OUT EVERY MONDAY

———

<Chapter 11 — Chapter 13>

———

You spent the night away from the Mandalorian, Ahsoka and the Child. You couldn’t face them yet, you wished to wait until the morning to show up when Ahsoka Tano would test Grogu.

When you woke up, and came to see the Child, Mando was already awake, Grogu in his arms cooing when he saw you and stretching his arms towards you.

You smiled to him, and without a word, the Mandalorian gave you the Child in your arms. You patted Grogu’s head and murmured:

“I missed you, little guy.”

Mando was watching you all along. He didn’t really understand your sudden change of behavior. You were usually the one cheering people up and hating avoidance. And to say he was terrified was an understatement. The Mandalorian removed his helmet in front you, yes it was dark and yes you couldn’t decipher his traits, but he had removed it in front of someone, he had broken his Creed in more than a way. He wasn’t regretting that night he had with you, it was something he cherished more than life itself. It was probably the best night of his life, and knowing after all he gave you, all he sacrificed, you were slowly going away from him. The bounty hunter didn’t show it, and he was grateful for his helmet, but it hurt, watching you indifferent, like nothing happened between both of you. He thought after that night you spent in Sorgan together, everything would be easier, but definitely not, it was worst. You only remained cordial with him, as if that night was only a mean to satisfy your common needs.

“Y/N.”He whispered, an ounce of despair in his voice.

“Mando.”

“Ahsoka told me Grogu is the same species as someone named Yodu.”

You giggled awkwardly, putting a hand on your mouth and holding the Child in your other hand.

“It’s not “Yodu”, Mando, it’s Yoda.”You replied, a small smirk drawing on your lips.

“Yodu, Yoda, that’s the same.”

You laughed again. It made you feel a bit more relaxed. You felt your anxiety slowly fading in presence of the Mandalorian.

“The Jedi told me the Child was trying to be trained and they hid him when the Jedi Temple was destroyed in Coruscant.”He stated, trying to make you talk to him.

“She is no Jedi.”

“What?”He questioned, eyebrows raised in wonder behind his heavy helmet.

“Ahsoka Tano is not a Jedi. She uses the Force, that’s all.”You answered harshly slowly putting the Child on a rock, and turning your back to Mando.

“But she is a Jedi. She has lightsabers and she uses the thing called the Force.”

“She is not! Not every person that uses the Force is a Jedi.”

The Mandalorian sighed and tilted his head.

“What?”You interrogated, hands on your hips and clenching your teeth.

“What are you then?”

You felt the tears rushing to your eyes, and you did your best to hold them. What were you? That was a simple question, and yet, you couldn’t reply.

“I don’t know anymore!”You spitted, water flowing in your eyes.”Now let me alone, Mando!”

“Y/N! I didn’t say that to hurt you.”He declared, rushing to your sides.

“Am I interrupting something?”Ahsoka Tano asked staring at you, and then at the Mandalorian.

“No, nothing.”You answered.

“Then, I am going to test the Child.”

Mando acquiesced, and you did the same, taking some steps back.

Ahsoka Tano closed her eyes, focused on the feeling of power and balance in her body. She put her arm in front of her, a stone resting in the palm of her hand, and then, using the Force, she twirled the stone in a stable and slow line to Grogu’s hands.

“Now, return the stone to me, Grogu.”Ahsoka asked in a reassuring tone.

“He doesn’t understand.”Mando replied immediately.

“He does.”You answered harshly.

Ahsoka tries to reassure the Child with a soft and slow tone, but he whined and looked at you and the Mandalorian. The bounty hunter did a little head nod gesturing to the Child to give back the stone to the ex-Jedi. At that moment, you felt your anger fade. It was for these little things you loved Din Djarin, and that was why it was so difficult to choose, or to make your own path. You were not Master Yoda after all. Even if your old Master had adviced you to follow your heart, how could you be sure you didn’t imagine him saying that to comfort you and make your decision right?

The Child let the stone clatter on the ground, avoiding both your and the Mandalorian’s gaze. Ahsoka sighed, and advanced towards the Child.

“I sense much fear in you.”

You sighed and felt a bit jealous of Ahsoka’s sweetness and natural gentleness. Where she was soft and caring, you were rough and stubborn. Maybe that’s why you got along so well with Anakin Skywalker.

“Come here.”Ahsoka said in an authoritative tone.

“He’s stubborn.”Mando replied, glancing at you discreetly.

“Not him. You. I want to see if he’ll listen to you.”

“That would be a first.”

Mando took Ahsoka’s place, and stared at you, and then at the Child. The ex-Jedi was explaining to the Mandalorian what to do, while you focused on the Force, trying to empty your head of any thoughts or emotions. For an instant, you could feel Grogu’s fear for his ability with the Force, his fear to lose both you and the Mandalorian, but what you sensed trouble you. Love. The Child loved you and the Mandalorian. A lot. You were like a mother to him, and Mando was like a Father. And then your link with the Force was broken by your anger and your feelings rushing like a wave hitting you all at once.

“Alright, kid. Lift the stone.”

“Come on.”You whispered to him a shy smile on your lips.”You can do it. We believe in you, Grogu.”

The Child looked at Mando with intensity and tries to connect with him through the Force.

“Stubborn like his father.”You thought referring to the Child and Mando, and Ahsoka glanced at you, a strict look on her face. At least, the Force was still with you.

“Grogu.”Mando murmured, the small thing that had became the Child’s toy in his hands.

Again, you fell in love with the Mandalorian. Just that small gesture, him playing with the Child’s toy, he made you remember why you were here in the first place. The Child and the Mandalorian had became your home.

“Come on you can have it.”

You nodded to Grogu, an affectionate smile on your face.

The Child stared at his toy, and then, with only a little push, the toy came to his hand. He cooed and Mando congratulated him, proud of his little youngling.

“That’s really great, little one.”You declared, patting his head in reward.

“He’s formed a strong attachment to both of you.”The ex-Jedi shouted.

You nodded.

“I cannot train him.”

“What?”Mando stammered, standing up straight away.”Why not? You’ve seen what he can do.”

“His attachment to you and Y/N makes him vulnerable to his fears. His anger.”

“All the more reason to train him.”The Mandalorian exclaimed.

“No. I’ve seen what such feelings can do to a fully trained Jedi Knight. To the best of us. Ask Y/N. She knows why I can’t train him, and she understands it more than anyone else.”

“I will not start this child down that path. Better to let his abilities fade.”

“But Ahsoka, we can’t do that! The Child has an ability, we need to train him, we can’t let that go to waste!”You screamed, grabbing Ahsoka’s arm to make her listen.

“I can’t, Y/N. You are in the best position to know why. You’ve seen what a Jedi can do when his feelings take over. For all of our sakes, I can’t train him.”

“Then I’ll train him.”You declared solemnly.

“You? The Force is really strong in you, Y/N, but your feelings make you unstable. Have you told him?”Ahsoka gestured to the Mandalorian.

“Tell me what?”He asked, looking at you with sudden interest.

You looked at the ground, ashamed.

“That’s what I thought. Y/N has troubles using the Force. Her powers are fading. She can’t control her feelings, and that’s making her impotent.”

The Mandalorian peered at you. He approached you carefully and asked:

“Is it true?”

Even if he had his helmet hiding his face, you could swear his eyes were staring at your soul.

“Yes. It’s true.”

He took some small steps towards you and you can only see the beskar of his helmet in front of you.

“What did you not tell me?”

“I was afraid of how you would react! I don’t know what to do anymore, Mando. I am useless to you without the Force, I only have my lightsaber. I was a Jedi all my life, and now that I can’t control my feelings, I need to discover who I am really.”You murmured, your voice breaking a bit.

“You should have told me, Y/N. You can tell me everything.”He whispered, caressing your cheek with his gloved hand.

“I thought you would try to get rid of me.”

“It hasn’t even cross my mind. Not after what happened between us. I want you to stay.”

Ahsoka Tano cleared her throat.

“I don’t want to disturb your touching conversation, but I’ve delayed too long, I must get back to the village.”

The Mandalorian sighed. He knew you were going to tell him more about your past and Ahsoka had interrupted you.

“The Magistrate sent me to kill you. I didn’t agree with anything. And I’ll help you with your problem, if you see to it that Grogu is properly trained.”The Mandalorian uttered, willing to do whatever it would take to see Grogu be trained.

“And I’ll help.”You vociferated, your hand on your lightsaber.”I may have troubles using the Force, but I do know how to fight.”

*****

You, Ahsoka, and Mando were ready to free the villagers and make Morgan Elsbeth pay for what she made these people endured. Maybe you weren’t a Jedi anymore, but you knew you wanted to fight for freedom, and peace, even if it was the greatest lie of the Universe.

You heard an alarm ringing. You and Mando exchanged a look.

Ahsoka Tano had arrived.

You and the Mandalorian were waiting for the proper moment to free the prisoners while the ex-Jedi would take care of that Morgan Elsbeth. Even if the Force wasn’t as strong as before within you, it hadn’t betrayed you when it came to that woman. She was a monster, and, on that point, the Force wasn’t wrong.

A guard was going to kill a prisoner. Mando was going to take care of him, but with a small nod, he understood you wanted to take care of him. You rushed to the guard’s sides who startled discovering you. You initiated your lightsaber in a rapid motion and your saber went through the guard’s stomach. The guard collapsed on the ground.

Mando surprised a villager who was going to try to save the prisoners’lives. You, the Mandalorian and the villager freed the prisonners, and tried to shelter as many people as possible.

The captain was here, admiring Mando with a threatening gaze. You rushed to his sides and initiated your lightsaber again. You really wanted to slice that guy.

“So you threw in with the Jedi?”The captain asked, surprised to see Ahsoka behind the Mandalorian.

“Looks that way.”

“Who do you think’s gonna win. Could be your side… Could be my side…”The captain declared, a sadistic smile appearing on his thin lips.

“Can I kill him, please?”You asked Mando.”I can’t bear his little smile.”

“I got no quarrel with you and your whore, Mandalorian.”

“Mando, please? Can I show him whose the whore?”You whispered.

“Wait. Don’t rush things, Y/N.”

“You and I are a lot alike. Willing to lay our lives down for the right cause. Which this is not. Sounds like you win.”

The captain put his weapon on the ground, and Mando removed his hand from his blaster. You saw the captain pulling a blaster out of his pocket quickly. Instinctively, you threw your lightsaber and pierced the captain’s stomach with the blade, returning after in your hand like nothing happened.

“Good job, Y/N.”

The same villager who wanted to save the prisoners came out of his hiding place to thank you and the Mandalorian, and then he screamed:

“Behind you, Jedi!”

Mando unsheathed his blaster and fired without even looking up.

“Thanks Mando. Looks like we’re even.”

“Hmm. You still owe me explanations, Y/N.”

“You’re right. All in due time.”

You waited for the bounty hunter at the ship. You were cuddling with the Child. You couldn’t say goodbye to him. He was family. How could you even say goodbye to someone you loved.

“I am gonna miss you, little guy. So much.”

The Child cooed in reply.

“I am back. It’s time.”Mando announced himself, taking the Child in his arms and talking to him softly.

“What will we do after, Mando? Without him?”

“I- I didn’t think of that.”

You both remained silent for an instant, trying to consider life without the Child, just both of you. A Mandalorian and an ex-Jedi.

“Mandalorian, you’re like a father to him. And Y/N, you’re like a mother to him. I cannot train him.”Ahsoka Tano stated waiting fro both of you in front of the Razor Crest.

“You made me a promise, and I held up my end.”

“There is one possibility.”Ahsoka began to say, not leaving your gaze.”Go to the planet Tython. You will find the ancient ruins of a temple that has a strong connection to the Force. Place Grogu on the seeing stone at the top of the mountain.”

“Then what?”Mando asked, holding softly the Child.

“Then Grogu may choose his path. If he reaches out through the Force, there’s a chance a Jedi may sense his presence and come searching for him. Then again, there aren’t many Jedi left.”

“Thank you.”The bounty hunter replied.

“May I have a word with Y/N before you go?”

The Mandalorian nodded, and let you talk with Ahsoka, your old friend.

“I suppose you don’t want to stay.”

“I have found a home, Ahsoka.”

“You are right. You’ve grown, Y/N. Master Yoda would be proud. He always expected a lot from you. He trusted you with his life.”

“I don’t deserve his recognition. Not yet.”You murmured to Ahsoka, as to yourself.

“I’ll miss you, Y/N, but you’ve found your own path. All I can say now is be careful with your feelings, don’t fall to the Dark Side. Don’t become like Anakin. Please.”

Listening to Ahsoka talking, you noticed at that moment she was vulnerable. She lost her old master. Anakin Skywalker who became Darth Vader. And in Ahsoka’s heart, that was something that made an indelible scar. She didn’t want to lose another friend to the Dark Side. Not again.

“I’ve succumbed to my feelings, but I realized that isn’t something necessarily bad. But I can promise you one thing, Ahsoka, I won’t fall to the Dark Side.”

Ahsoka fell into your arms, her arms embracing your smaller body. She had grown a lot since you’d last seen her. She wasn’t that reckless Padawan anymore, she was a woman. Not a Jedi, but she chose to do what was best for everyone.

“Thank you Ahsoka.”

“For what, Y/N?”

“You made me realize I am not a Jedi anymore. I am more than that. More than that title. I’ll be better than the Jedi where they failed before; Better than the Siths. What made Anakin fall to the Dark Side wasn’t love, it was the Jedi Code, if love had been allowed, he wouldn’t have turned to the Dark Side. I know what to do now. The Jedi Order isn’t anymore, and so is their Code. And you know what, I’ll love, I’ll let myself feel while using the Force. It’s who I am, Ahsoka. I don’t know what’ll happen, but I’ll make my own way. I’ll bring my guilt and shame along with me on that path, but I’ll be better than the Jedi and the Siths. That’s my promise to you.”

“I believe you. Take care of Grogu for me, and don’t give up on the Mandalorian. He seems stubborn, deadly and reckless, but he cares for you. He even threatens to kill me if I hurt you.”She admitted, a genuine smile appearing on her lips.

You giggled, and smirked. It was definitely your Mandalorian.

“I’ll try, Ahsoka. But I can’t promise I won’t slice him in two.”You laughed.

“Goodbye my friend.”

Walking towards the Razor Crest, you waved to Ahsoka Tano, your old friend you would probably never see again.

“Y/N. We were waiting for you.”Mando stated, gesturing to your seat near his on the ship.

“I need to tell you, Mando.”

He tilted his helmet in wonder, waiting for your answer.

“I am not a Jedi anymore.”

———

Taglist: @lol-who-am-i @kiaralein @kryttlebee @hoodedbirdie @heaven77 @eyeliveinabook @horsesandwolvesaremyanimals @mitamixer @fleurdemiel145 @kneeldowntoyouralpha @pinkninja190 @esoltis280 @over300books @lover1307 @sad-anxious-girl @jedi-dreea @katialvi

Tell me if you want to be tagged or if you want me to remove you from the taglist!

———

⬇️ Chapter 13 ⬇️

[band--psycho]

Obi Wan x Reader-I Love You(Follower Prompt)

My fifth entry for @girl-next-door-writes bingo challenge! I hope you enjoy it!!

Follower Prompt by @xacatapelsyx :

Were you ever going to tell me about her? You weren’t, were you? I had heard rumours but I didn’t even think to ask, I… I thought we told each other everything. 

You hated how jealous you were of Satine...hated the thoughts that flooded into your mind when you saw the two of them together. You’d heard quiet rumours about the two of them but naively, you chose not to believe them. It wasn’t until Anakin mentioned it that you thought there may be some truth in the words some of padawans were saying. And then you saw it, the way he looked at her...like she held all the suns and stars in the universe, a look of pure adoration, you knew that look all too well because it’s how you’d catch him looking at you..but now, he just did everything to avoid you. Instead of going on missions with you, he’d send Anakin in his place, the training sessions you both normally took part in all but ceased to exist...and you hated it. 

From the second you laid eyes on him, you knew you were a goner. When you first met him you felt both calm and nervous, a contradicting collection of emotions that you thought would fade in time, but they didn’t, you just got better at hiding them. After years of working and training together, things began to change, or you thought they did, you thought he felt the same. Now, you weren’t sure what to believe. Whenever you saw them together, you’d feel your heart ache as thoughts of jealousy would swim through your mind. There is no emotion, there is peace. There is no ignorance, there is knowledge. There is no passion, there is serenity. There is no chaos, there is harmony. There is no death there is the Force, that was the Jedi code, your code. And You knew how you shouldn’t have felt how you did, it was against the code, against everything that you were meant to believe in but that didn’t stop you from falling for Obi- Wan Kenobi.

 You needed answers. You needed to know if you’d imagined everything between the two of us, if it was all just some embarrassing miscommunication. So I headed to Obi’s chambers, you knew he was going to be back from his latest mission soon, so you thought you’d just wait here and ask him about it. You practised what you were going to say over and over again in your head, none of the words seeming to fit together or make sense. You couldn’t help the curse that fell from my lips as the words ran through your head; if you were wrong about how he felt, you were going to make a complete idiot of yourself. Then a wave of anxiety washed over you. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all you thought to yourself as you began to walk towards the door, but just as you were about to reach for the handle, it moved downwards as the door opened to reveal Obi Wan Kenobi on the other side. Confusion washed over his once soft features, including his eyes as he pushed your practically frozen body deeper into the room as he abruptly closed the door behind him before standing infront of you. 

“Y/n? What are you doing here?” He asked, you could feel his eyes burning into you, waiting for your answer, you thought about lying but he’d know even before the words left your mouth that it wasn’t the truth. 

“Were you ever going to tell me about her?” Your timid voice asked as you locked eyes with him, seeing all the colour drain from his face. Your question caught him off guard. 

Slowly he approached you; carefully he placed one foot infront of the other treating you as though you were prey and he was the predator and then you saw it in his eyes. A flicker of truth, that was only there for a second, he wasn’t going to tell you.

“You weren’t, were you?” Your voice was sharper now, gone was the timid girl who’d asked the first question, you tried to remain calm but couldn’t help the feeling of pain and anger that rushed through you. 

“I had heard rumours but I didn’t even think to ask. I thought you’d tell me.Maker, I can’t believe you! We’re supposed to be a team. I… I thought we told each other everything,”you said shaking your head, a fake laugh escaping your lips as you walked away from him, before you did though you noticed the  pain flashed in Obi Wans eyes. 

“Yes, I kept it a secret from you but don’t think you can get up on your high horse and lecture me about secrets when you have your own,” he said, grabbing your arm, halting your footsteps. You felt yourself jolt as his touch, a single touch shouldn’t have had this effect on you, it shouldn’t have made you want him more but it did. 

“Secrets. No I only have one secret and it’s not exactly a secret, least of all from you,” you whispered harshly, recoiling your arm from his grasp.

“But if you really want to hear me say it?” As you said those words you walked closer to him, your confidence momentarily faltering as you looked into his sapphire orbs. All the anger that you held seemed to wash away with one glance, instead you just felt sadness as reality dawned on you. You loved him and he didn’t love you...and now you were about to admit it, knowing what would happen, knowing what his answer would be. 

“I love you, okay? I love you and I hate it. I want this feeling to stop, but it won’t, I know it never will, I’m in love with you and I can’t stop,” you felt the tears fall from your eyes and slide down your cheeks as you admitted your feelings to him, your gaze instantly shifting to the floor, not wanting to see the look in his eyes. You were so wrapped up in your own thoughts that you hadn;t even realised him coming closer to you saw his shoes appear, when you looked up, he was closer than you originally thought. 

“I had feelings for Satine, a long time ago and I pushed those feelings aside to become a Jedi and I hadn’t seen her until this week. I won’t lie to you, yes, some of my old feelings came up but something else also came to light. How I feel about you,” you felt your heart flutter as he said those last few words. How he felt about you...

“None of it was a lie or in your head, you didn't imagine any of it. It was real, all of it. How I feel about you, is real,” he said, his voice soft and vulnerable as he placed his hands either side of your face, pulling you closer to him. So close that you could feel his warm breath on your lips. So close that with the slightest movement your lips would be touching. 

“I’ve been in love with you from the first moment I saw you.I love you, Y/n, I’ve tried not to but I cannot get you out of my head,” and with that he closed what little distance there was between the two of you, placing his lips on yours. He was kissing you. It took a few moments for your brain to catch up with what was happening, but soon enough you started kissing him back, like he was the only source of oxygen in the world. You felt like you were on cloud nine, every thought seemed to fade away, the only thing on your mind was this moment with him. This perfect moment.

(Credit to the gif owner)

[passable-talent]

okok so imagine growing up/ training with Anakin as kids in the Jedi temple?? and when he turns to the dark side, you join him and rule by his side???? I- asdfghjjfksa

how did u know that I’m a slut for this kinda shit

i’m not even 100% sure this was meant as a request but anon, you’re in luck, BECAUSE YOU’RE GETTING AN ENTIRE FUCKING FIC OUT OF THAT SHIT

make an entire 70 song playlist just to write this? yes. yes i did. 

As a Jedi Knight, you had been assigned to protect Padme Amidala. Such an assignment had been decided by the chancellor himself- he did so adore Padme, and could not stand the thought of her coming to harm. 

Darth Sidious, you see, had assumed that Anakin Skywalker cared for her deeply, and so needed her alive, for his plan concerning Anakin to come to fruition. He made a single, harmless mistake, one that had managed not at all to affect his plan. 

All that time that Anakin spent with Padme was indeed because he cared for her. She was his best friend- and it was you that he had married in secret some years ago. He did care deeply for Padme Amidala, but not in the same way he felt for his oldest friend in the Jedi Order, besides Obi-Wan. The one he’d grown up with, trained with. 

She was your best friend, and his. The three of you were an unstoppable trio (people notice when three of incredible beauty and power like the three of you enter a room), and you trusted each other with everything. She knew and helped hide your relationship with him, she was the only human at your wedding. 

And when the Republic was remade into the Empire, you sat in her apartment in Coruscant, her loyal bodyguard and best friend. As you always did when you had much to consider, you rolled a ring around your finger. Anakin had given it to you at your wedding. It wasn’t a wedding band, just a simple ring, one that wasn’t too far out of place for a Jedi to wear. But it was your wedding ring, all the same.

Obi-Wan knew that if anyone would know where Anakin was, it was one of the two of you. And he knew that you’d be together. 

“When was the last time you saw him?”

“Yesterday,” you answered, as you often did for the senator. It helped give her that aire of superiority that served her well. 

“And do you know where he is now?” He pressed, and you looked to Padme. She shook her head. 

“No,” you answered for her again, leaning still against one of the columns of her apartment. You knew she was safe with Obi-Wan, and your guard was as low as it had been in weeks. 

“I need your help,” Obi-Wan said, to the both of you. “He is in grave danger.” You stood up straight, surprised. 

“From the Sith?” You asked. 

“No,” Obi-Wan said, “from himself.” You approached Obi-Wan slowly, until you stood side by side with Padme. “I’m afraid...” Obi-Wan looked to the side, full of sorrow. “Anakin has turned to the Dark Side.” 

It felt as though a hole opened up in the floor beneath you, and you could do nothing but fall. 

“You’re wrong,” Padme said, conviction in her voice, “How could you even say that?”

You turned your face to the side, eyes cast to the floor, and murmured only a single ‘no’.

Obi-Wan pushed between the two of you, still pain in his voice, and you didn’t know how this could get any worse. 

“I-I have seen a security hologram,” he stuttered, voice soft, and you turned toward him. “Of him...” he trailed away as his footsteps stopped, and he brought his hand to his mouth. “Killing younglings.” 

“Not Anakin,” Padme said, “he couldn’t!”

“It can’t be true,” you murmured, shutting your eyes briefly against it all, as though you could block it away. Your thumb went to the ring on your fourth finger, just to feel the metal, and to remember who it represented. 

“He was deceived by a lie, we all were.” Obi-Wan turned, and now his face was hard. “It appears the chancellor is behind everything, including the war.” 

“The Emperor,” you corrected, anger coiling between your ribs, and now you had someone to blame. The same man who had shown so much kindness to you, and your two best friends. And he’d done this. 

“Palpatine is the Sith Lord we’ve been looking for,” Obi-Wan told you both, and you flicked your eyes for just a moment to Padme- she looked surprised, and hurt. As were you all. “After the death of Count Dooku, Anakin became his new apprentice.” She paused, taking it all in, and in her strife took a seat on the nearby couch. 

“Anakin isn’t a Sith,” you said, under your breath, wishing you could convince yourself of it. 

“I must find him,” Obi-Wan said, and your gaze snapped to him. 

“And kill him?" You accused, “He’s been deceived, just like the rest of us. You said it yourself!” 

“He has become a very great threat,” Obi-Wan insisted, and you shook your head, taking a step in his direction. 

“And he can be lead back to the light!” You said, astounded that Obi-Wan could even consider harming him. “Obi-Wan, don’t you see? If you turn on him, it’ll only push him further toward the dark! You, Obi-Wan Kenobi, his master!” You noticed the briefest expression of guilt cross Obi-Wan’s face, and you thought you might convince him to reconsider. 

His eyes flicked downward to the ring, and his resolve hardened, and he stepped back toward the balcony, and his ship. He paused, just outside the walls of the apartment. 

“(Y/N),” he said, and you lifted your chin toward him. “You’ve married him, haven’t you?” 

You kept his gaze, and did not deny it. 

“I’m so sorry,” he said, turning from you and boarding his ship. 

“Remember what I said, Obi-Wan,” you said, and the conviction in your voice was almost a threat, “If you find him. If he thinks you’ve turned on him, we’ll never get him back.” Obi-Wan nodded, slightly, and left the balcony. 

You turned back to Padme with sadness in your eyes. 

“You know where he is, don’t you?” She asked, and you reached with your right hand to fiddle with the ring on your left. 

“Of course I do,” you admitted, and she walked to you. 

“Let me come with.”

“Padme, love,” you said, “if what Obi-Wan said is true, and he has turned to the dark, I want to keep you as far away as possible. I’ll send Captain Typho down, he’ll watch over you while I’m gone.” Padme nodded, pulling you into a hug. 

“Take my ship,” she said, “so he’ll know it’s you.” 

“Thank you,” you breathed, and when you parted, you felt her run her thumb over your wedding ring. “I promise I’ll bring him back.” 

Mustafar- that’s where he was. You flew there, alone with your thoughts for the entire ride, but you knew that it would be your husband waiting for you when you arrived. 

You touched down on the landing dock, and for a moment, stared across the fiery landscape, wondering if this was your own, personal hell. To lose Anakin, to stand opposite Obi-Wan, to abandon Padme. 

A figure appeared, and dropped his hood, and you’d recognize him anywhere. He ran- and you did the same, opening the hatch so you could meet him. He opened his arms to you, and you fell into them, and if you hadn’t known, you wouldn’t have thought that anything changed. 

“Padme’s ship,” he said, posing a question, and you shook your head.

“She’s on Coruscant,” you said, resting your forehead against his shoulder. “It’s just me.” 

“What are you doing out here?” He asked, and you swallowed hard. 

“I was worried about you,” you said, holding onto his arms. “Obi-Wan...” you trailed off, and thought of your own advice. If there was any chance that the two of them would ever reconcile, it would be affected by your words in this moment. 

“We’ve been told terrible things,” you said, and you saw concern in his eyes. How this loving man before you could have done what Obi-Wan said... it didn’t make sense. 

“What things?”

“They said you’ve turned to the dark side,” you said, nearly in a whimper, but you chose not to specify who ‘they’ where that told you this rumor. He lowered his gaze, and pressed his forehead to yours, and it almost helped. “That you killed younglings.” 

“They’re trying to turn you against me,” Anakin said, holding you gently, and you shut your eyes. Obi-Wan was right, and Sidious had manipulated Anakin. You just had to get him back. 

“Anakin, I want to help you,” you said, and you felt him pull from your grip, slowly. 

“And I want to protect you,” he said, and his voice was so calm, like he didn’t realize the meaning that was behind them. “Only my new powers can do that.” 

As a Jedi, you excelled in decision making. You had strong instincts, and you had been praised in the past that any decision you made was likely the right one. 

So here, you needed to make a choice. A choice as to how you would bring Anakin back to the light. You could push, now, and make him feel betrayed. Or you could wait, and tug him slowly. 

The problem with the plan, the kink in the line, was that Obi-Wan was on his way, searching for Anakin. Sidious likely was, too. If you didn’t pull him to the light now, things would get worse. 

But you were willing to do whatever it took to keep Anakin alive. 

You pulled him against you again, in another hug, and wished that you could spend forever here, wrapped within him. 

“I am becoming more powerful than any Jedi has ever dreamed of,” he said, fingers slipping through your hair the way he would calm you of a nightmare. If only this were another nightmare, and you would wake up, and all would be right again. “And I’m doing it for you. To protect you.” 

You were sure, now, that Obi-Wan was right. Anakin had been taken to the dark side, but you knew he had not yet been lost. You knew you could bring him back. 

“We could leave,” you suggested quietly, fingers knotting into his robes. “Leave it all behind. We don’t have to be Jedi, we can just be together, far away from here.” 

“Don’t you see?” he asked, and as you pulled away, you saw a smile on his face. “We don’t have to run away anymore. I have brought peace to the Republic! Now we can be safe, Padme can be safe, the Separatists are gone. I’m even more powerful than the chancellor, (Y/N), I-I can overthrow him, if that’s what you want.” 

You had to make a decision. You had to choose. 

“And together, you and I can rule the galaxy! Make things the way we want them to be, the way they should be!” 

Choose- choose between the Jedi way that you’d been taught all your life, or Anakin. 

You brought your hands to his face, letting your fingertips settle in his hair. 

“Promise me,” you whispered, and your eyes lifted to his. “Promise me that when the day comes, you’ll overthrow the chancellor. Promise me that you’ll choose me over him.” 

“Of course,” he insisted, putting his flesh hand over yours, “It’s all for you, (Y/N).” 

“Anakin,” said a voice behind you, and you whirled from his arms to see Obi-Wan, standing at the hatch of Padme’s ship. 

“No, no!” You said, throwing up a hand toward him, your other to your side as though you were protecting Anakin from him. “No, Obi-Wan, you’ll only push him away! I can handle this!”

“He’s endangering himself, (Y/N),” Obi-Wan said, stepping down the ramp. 

“You brought him here?” 

“No!” you shouted over your shoulder, “I didn’t know he was on the ship!” Turning back to Obi-Wan, you brought your hand up higher, and you’d force him back, if you needed to. 

“Obi-Wan, trust me. He’s fine, he’ll be okay, I need you to go.” Obi-Wan looked at you for a moment, and you saw no trust in his eyes. Your right hand, which once kept Anakin back, slowly rounded to your saber where it hung on your back. 

“Obi-Wan, please. We don’t need to fight.” 

You expected, though, that you would have to. 

But Obi-Wan let out a breath, and conceded, stepping away. 

“Listen to me, both of you,” you said, turning your shoulders just so that you could refer to both of them, but still stand between them. 

“Obi-Wan, you need to be far from here. Far from Coruscant. Take Padme, too- far away. I don’t trust the emperor not to harm either of you.” You made a small motion to Anakin.

“We’ll take care of Sidious. He trusts Anakin, we can remove him. When it’s safe, I’ll let you know, and you can come home.” You could feel the way the air between them bristled, but it seemed Obi-Wan trusted you enough to heed your words. 

“Take Padme’s ship. Fly to Coruscant, then go, as far away as you can.”

“Tatooine,” Anakin suggested, voice dark. 

“Yes, go to Tatooine, and hide, please, Obi-Wan.” 

Without a word, Obi-Wan nodded, and turned back to the ship. You watched as it lifted off, and you didn’t look away until it had gone. You could feel Anakin simmering behind you. 

“Did he come to kill me?” He asked, and you reached for him. 

“No, no,” you soothed, hating yourself with every lie you told him. You knew it was for the best. “He was worried, worried for you, worried that he would have to kill you because of your loyalty to Sidious.” You pet his hair back, holding his face. “But you aren’t loyal to Sidious, see? And now that he knows that, we can all work together. He’ll keep Padme safe until we rule the galaxy.” Anakin nodded, resting his forehead against yours again. 

“When the time is right, (Y/N), I’ll do it. I’ll kill Palpatine.”

“I know,” you breathed, and it almost seemed like everything would be okay. 

~~~

He didn’t kill Palpatine. 

Sidious trusted him, and so did what Anakin asked, keeping you alive and nearby. He called you a Sith, and fashioned a saber for you, its color autumn red, with just the slightest reminder of your former orange. You were allowed to be on his left, when Anakin was on his right. 

In his office at the senate, he was in the midst of a meeting when you ran him through.

It had been two months since that day on Mustafar. Obi-Wan reported that Yoda had disappeared, and most other Jedi had scattered throughout the system. Padme was safe. And you loved Anakin, but he was taking his time to remove Sidious. 

You wondered if it was because of Sidious’ control over him. Possibly, Sidious could sense his intentions. You doubted he could sense yours. 

So, from behind him, beside your husband, you ignited your saber, running straight through his stomach. 

He fell to the floor, and the members of his cabinet looked at you, stunned. 

“Leave,” Anakin ordered, and they immediately obeyed. With Palpatine dead, the empire fell to Anakin. 

When the room was empty, you looked down at the monster on the floor. He was wheezing, and bleeding rapidly. 

With hands almost tender, you sat him up, and rested his head against the desk. 

“With your remaining breath, my master,” you said, sitting back onto the floor, “tell me your plan. Tell me how you pulled Anakin to the dark side. And I’ll tell you why you failed.” He glared at you. 

“I could kill you now,” you offered, auburn saber still in your hand. “But I want to know how to do what you’ve done. To pass on the way of the Sith.” 

“Anakin Skywalker loved Padme Amidala,” Palpatine wheezed, and you raised your chin. “I promised him that I could save the one he loved from certain death. And when she disappeared, he held loyalty to no one but me.” 

“You didn’t count on me,” you continued for him, “If it weren’t for me, it would have worked.” 

“Yes,” Palpatine growled. You smiled, wickedly, and collected your legs underneath you as though you were meditating. 

“You failed,” you said, holding up your end of the bargain, “because while Anakin loves Padme, he married me.” Sidious’ eyes went wide. How he had managed to discuss Padme with Anakin and it never somehow came up that he hadn’t married Padme, you didn’t want to know. 

“His loyalty is to me. And to Padme- who is right now on Tatooine, in the care of Obi-Wan Kenobi.” You lifted your saber, pointing it to him casually, like one might gesture with a pen. 

“It seems, Sidious, I never discussed with you my true feelings for Anakin.” You pressed the saber forward to his stab wound, and the blood around it began to boil and sizzle. You went in slowly, making him groan, having not enough energy to scream. 

“I love him,” you explained, “I would do anything for him.” You slid the saber up toward his chest, and began the same slow press, this time toward his heart, through healthy flesh. 

“And I’ve got to say,” you began, readying to shove the saber forward and stop his miserable, shriveled heart, “I don’t think I appreciate how you’ve treated him.” 

One thrust forward, and Emperor Palpatine was no more. 

With his lungs empty of their final breaths, you snuffed your saber, and turned back to Anakin. He was still sitting in the chair he’d had beside Palpatine, eyes trained to you, shining in intensity. 

“You’re in my seat,” you said as you stood. You approached him and grabbed him by the shirt, pulling him against you. “I’m afraid I’ve taken your place as right hand to the emperor.” 

“Is that so?” he teased, his hands on your lower back. 

“I believe it is,” you breathed, “Emperor Skywalker.” 

No one in the galaxy had ever shared a sweeter kiss. 

-🦌 Roe

[damn-stark]

The Jedi Master

Chapter 2 of Unfrozen

Summary: You once were a General and Jedi Master fighting against separatists alongside the clones, the next, darkness clouded over and life passed in flash, and before you knew it you’re waking up with no memory running for your life.

A/N- next part, I hope you all like it!!

Warning- Angst, SLOWBURN.

Pairing- Since Poe and Rey were tied, what I’m going to do is let you all choose which you like more as the story continues and chemistry’s unfold!!!

————

“So this is our key? A Jedi Master?” Finn asks Rey in a horrible whisper. Your drift your gaze up to the trio and pull your hands from your head, looking to Commander Dameron as his gaze remains on you.

“Do you have a starfighter?”

Commander Dameron blinks in surprise, not expecting you to speak, he shifts in his seat and shakes his head. “Have you seen the ship we’re on? Doesn’t really fit a starfighter now does it? Plus it seems like you may have some type of amnesia, you can’t fly.”

You sit up straight to stand to your feet, looking to the end of the hall and feeling the strong urge to not do as he says and attempt your sudden made up plan. “I can fly, I need to go save my Commander. You heard what they said, they have him.”

Rey stands up and gets in your way as you attempt going out to search for some sort of escape pod. “I can’t let you do that. You can’t, you don’t know if they’re lying—”

“I do,” you remark with a cold gaze. Even if you didn’t have an idea how, you knew. “Search your feelings, citizen.”

Finn beside her looks between the both of you with his eyes peeled and Commander Dameron steps in. “We can’t go back on just a hunch.”

“And he’s my Commander, I leave no man behind.” You interject sharply. “And it’s no hunch, they said it, aren’t you paying attention?”

The Commander sighs and nods, grabbing your shoulder to attempt and assure you. “I understand that, trust me, but getting you back to our base alive is our priority. If you go back there's a possibility that you’ll get killed.”

You step back away from him and begin to pace as you think of a plan.

“Plus, if it’s you they want, they won’t kill your Commander,” Rey continues, “they’ll use him as bait. Besides don’t you want to remember your past first?”

You stop your pacing and lift your head to look at her, frowning and letting out a deep sigh. “I do.”

“Well I can help, but only if we go back to base.”

You hum and sit back down to put your head in your hands again. “At least please tell me what year it is? I,” you pause and swallow thickly at the feeling of a sharp pounding pain in your head, more memories flash, but they’re like if you were looking at someone else’s memories. It was all surreal. “I can’t remember.”

The three of them look at one another and commander Dameron answers for all of them with a sympathetic look featured on his face. “It’s thirty-four ABY. It’s been fifty four years since the fall of the Republic and jedi order.”

Your frown deepens and it seems that at the mention, at the knowledge of how many years have passed your headache heightens. You cover your whole face with your hands and tilt your head down, part of you wants to cry, but the other part doesn’t know why exactly. Your head was in thousands of pieces with only small fragments of it pieced together.

“General….Heart, is it?” You hear Finn's voice ask. You proceed to look up and meet his dark gaze, at that moment seeing another vivid flash of someone else.

“Y/N!”

You whirl around and a smile instantly widens on your face at the sight of Anakin Skywalker, your best friend; you see he mirrors your gesture and you both rush towards one another to meet each other halfway with a big, warm bear hug. “Ani! Haha. It’s so good to see you!”

Anakin pulls away and his grin widens as you two begin to pace around each other in a circle, as if it was the most unbelievable thing in the whole universe. “And it’s so good to see you! Damn, it’s been so long! Wow! Look at you! Jedi Master and all!”

You grin and just shrug, “what can I say? But look at you! Look at your hair!” Your eyes scan his shoulder length light hair and you can’t help but giggle at the memory of his previous cut. “It suits you.”

“What can I say?” He mocks you, both of you finally coming to a complete stop in front of each other, still sharing the same gleeful look. “But you, wow, I’m so proud. Turned Jedi Master at nineteen. You’re the youngest Jedi master, I’m sorry I couldn’t be there.”

“It’s no problem, it was a year ago, I’m over it.” You assure him.

Anakin rests his hands on his hips and his grin falls a bit, but not completely, his childlike joy still remains. “What is it your clones call you, General Heart is it?”

Your smile turns shy, and you nod, “yep, it’s silly, but they insist on it, so I’m letting it slide.”

“Well, General Heart not to brag, or anything, but I was the youngest Jedi knight to become a general.”

“Oh, is that so?”

“Definitely,” Anakin says smugly as he crosses his arms over his chest. “So I guess we’re both making history.” He begins to approach you and wraps his arm around your shoulders to walk you to the briefing room. “We’ve definitely come far, I never imagined becoming war Generals so young.”

You wrap your arm around his shoulders and agree with his statement. “Nor I.”

Your eyes widen and tears sting your eyes, you look away from Finn and grab onto your chest as this sudden heart aching pain starts within you. Hundreds of memories flash through your mind, all having to do with that same young blue-eyed, brunette that just suddenly appeared in your mind. You suddenly remember his name and what he meant to you, you acknowledge your name from that memory but even that seemed insignificant at the time. You hear the three people before you begin to worry over your current state, but you block them out as the memories of Anakin Skywalker just resurface.

Just the memories that had to with him and nothing else.

“Anakin….” you mouth, feeling the subtle taste of salt in the corner of your lips.

“Did you just remember something?” You hear Rey ask in a concerned tone.

When you look up to her, you make sure to wipe away your tear before speaking. “Uh, yes, my name and a friend.”

“Oh...what is your name?”

“It’d be pretty ridiculous to ask if either of you had knowledge of my friend, would it not?” You ask desperately avoiding her question.

“Uh, depends what friend.” Commander Dameron answers.

“Anakin Skywalker.”

Again they look at one another and share a look you couldn’t understand, when they turn back to you, Rey suddenly has this assuring look on her face that is basked by the yellow light from the hall beyond the cockpit door. “We’re almost at base, it’s best if General Organa helps you with your questions, she’s much more reliable than any of us could be.”

You nod slowly and grip onto your knees as you reveal your name. “My name is Master Y/N L/N.” You offer them a kind smile.

“Oh well it’s very nice to meet you, Master y/n l/n,” Rey formally greets you with her hand extended out towards you.

You look at it and wrap your hand around her forearm. Which confuses her slightly, leaving her a little stunned and unable to think of what to do until a couple minutes later where she does the same. You pull away after a few seconds and stand up to take Finns arm and then Commander Dameron’s; who seems a little starstruck now. He has his lips parted and keeps his hand on your forearm longer than the rest had.

“I, I just want to say that I’m a big fan,”

“Huh?” You quirk your brow and look at him nervously.

He draws in a deep breath and then swallows thickly before releasing his breath and explaining. “You may not remember, but you’re actually a very amazing pilot, my mother used to look up to you, she would tell me so many stories of you and Anakin Skywalker.”

“Oh,” you grin, feeling a warmth begin to burn under your cheeks, “well I’m very flattered.” You use your other hand to grab his forearm with both hands and just suddenly become very flustered. “Thank you,” you pull your hands away and rest them on your hips, “I’m very honored, as well as proud and upset because I can’t rub it in my friends face.” You smirk, “regardless, thank you.”

“No wonder you seemed so familiar,” Commander Dameron added with a more confident smile.

You look to the other two who just look at the commander with a teasing look, and before they could say a thing, the same blue and white droid as before rolls before you and beeps before showing a hologram screen of a scoreboard that read, “Skywalker v L/N.”, and had a line in the middle that each side kept a score of ten tally marks. You narrow your gaze on it and can’t help but grin brightly at the memory. “Ah, yes I remember now, Ani and I had a racing competition going on, we restarted every couple of months because he couldn’t handle not being the best pilot in the galaxy or whatever he called himself.”

The droid remarks your comment and you laugh for the first time before glaring at him. “Don't make me throw you out of this ship you old fried machine, because I will. Anakin isn’t here to stop me.”

The droid goes on a burning ramble and you recall your relationship with this droid and just ignore him and sit back down to look at the three people just watching your interaction. Rey chuckles, but still looks at the droid with concern. “Wow, I’ve never heard him swear, it’s new.”

You scoff, “new is understatement.”

“Well,” Commander Dameron sighs as he turns to the control board, “enough of that, the ship should jump out of hyperspace in three, two and one.” He jumps on the pilot seat and maneuvers the ship down to a beautiful, green jungle planet that soon showed a small hidden base on the ground, hidden amongst all of the greenery. When the ship lands you can’t help but feel a tight stomach churning feeling, or as if something was going to happen. You walk out as normal as possible, you disguise your nerves and walk through the tiny base, seeing the stares and hearing the murmurs. It’s not until you walk inside a building does your gaze focus on one person, on the General they were speaking of.

Upon sight of you she dropped what she was doing and approached you and the four walking beside you. You studied her and noticed she was very small, old and pretty, yet her determination was unmistakably reconzible. Her brown eyes locked on your eyes and her eyes widened a bit as her face turned paler, as if she was seeing a ghost. Once you all finally came to a stop in front of one another, she managed a warm assuring smile that matched her greeting. “Master y/n l/n, welcome.” She grabs your hands and her gaze turns more sympathetic, “everything must be so confusing at the moment, I’m sorry, but I can assure you that we can help with any of your concerns.”

You tugs your lips into an understanding smile and nod. “Thank you, General. And as far concerns, I have plenty,” you swallow thickly and sigh, “I can’t seem to remember a lot of my past, I’ve been getting some memories back. Piece by piece, but there's still a lot I’m missing.”

The General nods and walks you further into the base. “Well to ease some confusion, I’m General Leia Organa Skywalker.”

You drop your smile and a new wave of confusion spills all over you. You blink and freeze in your spot. “Skywalker?”

“Yes,” she confirms, turning to face you as the others watched curiously, “you may have known my father, Anakin Skywalker.”

A faint smile tugs on your lips and you nod, “yes, he was my best friend, he was like my brother, and,” you suddenly cut yourself off and stare blankly at the ground as the memory slams into you. “And I knew your mother too. She was a good friend too,” tears well in your eyes and your voice sounds shaky, “you-you’re their child. I knew of you, of course you were only a fetus before, but I knew of their secret. It’s such an honor to meet you.”

The general's face expresses different emotions, but she ends up smiling softly. “And it's an honor meeting you. I’m sorry for what happened, to be thrusted into such a new place, a new year, everything must feel like a crazy dream.”

“Yeah, just about,” you nod, clasping your hands behind your back.

“And I’m sorry to put you in distress, but it seems the force has brought you here for a reason. The galaxy is yet in another war and we need your help.”

You frown and keep your gaze downcasted. “Hmm.”

“And before I go into much more grave detail, I think it’s better if we ease your mind and help recover what you've lost.” Her gaze drifts to Rey beside you and she gives her a small nod, “Rey if you could, please.”

“Of course.” Said girl responds kindly, turning to you and offering a warm smile, “we’ll find more peace outside, I can take you somewhere.”

With no choice in the matter you follow after her, leaving the two men and the General behind; walking back out to the blazing sun and the humid jungle air. Even if you knew it was impossible, part of you searched for something slightly familiar, a face mainly. But nothing, you were surrounded by new unfamiliar people. All from a different generation apparently, all just purely new.

“We can stop here,” Rey spoke up, breaking you from your train of thought and stopping in a clear spot. Proceeding to turn to you with a sweet and assuring smile, “I’m just going to need you to clear your mind and meditate. I’m going to just help you remember, heal you in a way.”

“Okay,” you nod, looking down at the new change of clothes she had let you borrow before straightening your shoulders and closing your eyes to take in deep breath, breathing them out and clearing your mind, falling into a deep state of meditation. Not feeling as her fingers gently touch the side of your temple and she slowly begins to use the force to ease your confused state; to heal what was damaged and reel back everything that had been lost in the inner corner of your brain, bringing back a huge wave of emotions that used to be well put away. Causing a pain and disturbance within you.

“Something doesn’t feel right, I sense a disturbance in the force.” A new pain shoots through your head and you fall to your knees, screaming and hearing voices and other shouts, feeling a heartbreaking pain and a breakaway.

“Execute order 66.”

The order passes over your head as you’re on your knees in pain, all you could say was just. “No...Anakin.”

The heartbreaking pain finds its source and the face of your longtime friend fades through your mind and displays an unfamiliarity in his now yellow sith eyes. As hard as you try to hold on and just confuse it as some trick, the blue eyes that belonged to Anakin were gone. You were left suffering until it was too late to notice what was actually happening around you.

“General General run! Get out of here!”

“Ahhhh!” You scream out and fall to your knees, grabbing onto your chest and crying out in pain and heartbreak as everything resurfaces and you remember yourself, remember your time before it froze. Literally.

“Y/N! I’m so sorry!” Rey exclaims as she falls on her knees before you, grabbing your hands and trying to help ease your situation.

You fall on your hands and knees and cry out to the ground. You punch it and punch it as if that was going to do anything. You last in your own little secluded, painful and heartbreaking world for a while, until you could grasp what was currently happening, where you were, what time you were in. You speak up hoarsely and unintinally startle Rey. “I remember, everything,” you croak out, slowly picking up your head to look at her with your bloodshot eyes. “The force, it kept me alive when I fell in the ice,” you sniffle, “my commander pushed me to save me and I pulled him down with me. The force kept us alive.”

Rey’s eyebrows knit together and her light eyes search you for her response. She’s caught lost, unable to find the exact wording to help you. She can only seem to cup your shoulder and try to share an assuring look. “I’m sorry. I really am. I wish I could say something to ease your pain, but I feel like there's nothing I can say.”

“Don’t worry,” you assure her before you clear your throat and push yourself to your feet, “I understand. Thank you for helping me,” you express kindly, grabbing her hand and failing to smile, “I appreciate it.”

You drop her hands and then begin your mission and walk past her, hearing her quickly catch up. “Wait, Master, don’t you want to know more? I know a way you can talk to your previous master, talk to any master and...Anakin Skywalker—”

“Don’t,” you cut her off sharply, “don’t say that traitors name again.” You whirl around and glare at her, “don’t you dare.”

Rey stops in her tracks and looks at you stunned and mouth agape, gasping at the new sudden change at the mention of his name. She wants to apologize, but you walk off towards General Organa before she could.

“General.”

“Yes, Master?”

“I need a ship.”

“Wait,” she blinks, “what?”

Your gaze drifts to Commander Dameron and Finn behind her and then slides back to her. “Rey helped me remember what I had forgotten and now I need a ship to rescue my friend. My commander.”

“But, we—”

“And I understand you need me help,” you cut her off in a cold tone, “but I need to save my friend before I can help. Your fellow soldiers promised and I promised my friend I would help him. What kind of General would I be if I can’t keep my promises?”

“Master, l/n, I know you’re desperate, but there's still much you have to learn, to know before you go running off.” General Organa tries to calm you down, “I can help, you’re struggling, you’re confused and hurting. Please wait until everything makes sense.”

You fist your hands and shake your head, “no, I can’t, but I'll hear you out after.”

“You’ll hear me out?” She questioned with a pointed gaze.

“Hmm.”

General Organa looks at Rey behind you and then at the two behind her before looking back at you with a sigh. “Fine, but I can’t let you go alone.” She turns to Commander Dameron and her face softens, “Poe, I know I may be asking a lot, but I trust you to fly her to her location and bring her and her Commander back. All of you.” She turns to Finn and Rey with the same look.

“I don’t need help,” you interject, “I can fly myself.”

“You could,” General Organa says as she turns back to you, “but I need reassurance that you’ll return, I need you.”

You look to a ship parked a few feet behind you and then return your gaze to her, adding a feigned smile and a lie. “I will.”

.

.

.

.

A/N- again depending on the interactions with Rey and Poe you guys can choose which ship you like better :) Rey and him tied so I feel like choosing as the story proceeds would be fun.

[jennana501]

Attachment and the Jedi Way

SPOILERS FOR THE MANDALORIAN AND STAR WARS REBELS

I always know a story is quality when what I want to say about it to my mother and sisters is too difficult to text, and I have to drive over and talk with them in person. Such was the case when I watched the Mandalorian Chapter 13. There were so many juicy details, plot developments, and general excitement about the long awaited appearance of one of our favorite Star Wars characters that I couldn’t stand being restricted by phone when I wanted to gush a million things. We were all so stunned with the emotion of her appearance. Truly a moment I will remember for the rest of my life. 

But after all the sweet outer frosting on the Chapter 13 cake had been licked clean, I dove into the center of this delectable episode and began to savor in its indulgent but substantial core. I have many thoughts about Thrawn, where Rex can be (is he dead or alive?) and where the season is going to go from there. What has interested me the most is Ahsoka’s reaction to our newly named green baby friend, Grogu. 

First I must say how much I love Rosario Dawson’s performance. I feel she knows who Ahsoka is and what she has gone through. I am reminded of little ‘Soka in her very first appearance in the Clone Wars animated movie when she takes care of the way less loveable baby Hutt. Seeing that she is  charmed by Grogu and that she clearly thinks he is cute makes me feel all sorts of warm fuzzies. Their very mythical and silent conversation in the moonlight shows how in tune with the force Ahsoka has become and that Grogu himself is much more than meets the eye. 

And yet when it comes to it, Ahsoka says she cannot train Grogu. The reason: his attachment to Din. I was surprised at first. Ahsoka does not see herself as a Jedi, at least as far as her association with the order that raised and trained her. I didn’t think I’d hear about attachment from someone who has forgone the Jedi way, especially since Ahsoka appears to have indulged in an attachment or two.

I immediately realized she was on to something. I recall Grogu’s moments of using the force: saving Din from the mudhorn; using the Force to save everyone from a giant fireball; Force healing Greef Karga; and Force choking Cara Dune. The latter example stands out to me as being the most violent use of the Force we see from little Grogu. He perceives that Din is in danger and acts against what we now know is his training to hurt someone in a manner that is often consistent with the dark side. 

Sure he is innocent and adorable. But he is also dangerous. And Ahsoka is right. It’s his attachment to Din that turns him from benevolent force using baby, to emotionally fueled deadly force bomb.

But I’ve seen Star Wars Rebels. I know that a Jedi can have relationships with other people and not turn to the dark side. You can love and still listen to the will of the Force. The Jedi were wrong. So I’m here to look into what attachment is, how you can love and not have attachment, and how Grogu might still become a Jedi, or at least the new wave sort of Jedi. 

First we must look at the poster child for attachment issues: Anakin Skywalker. The Clone Wars TV show could be renamed- Star Wars: Attachment and How it Disrupts Nearly Every Mission the Republic Assigns Anakin. He prioritizes Padme, Ahsoka, R2, and even Obi-wan over everything else. He is constantly  defying the orders of his commanders and putting the mission in danger. 

This all comes down to what happened to Anakin’s mother. 

When Anakin is taken from Tatooine, he has to leave his mother behind, with whom he shares a strong bond and attachment. When he is brought before the council and they say “he is too old”, what it really means is “he has already attached himself to something other than the Force.” Why else would being “too old” matter? The Jedi prefer blank slates for a good reason. Very small children have not developed strong attachments.

Anakin does turn into Darth Vader, after all. 

It would appear the Jedi are very right to say that Anakin should not be trained. He is ripped away from his mother; the man who believes in him is killed; and he is forced to be trained by someone who treated him with bitter indifference. After losing his mother he has no help, no advice, no direction other than to stifle his negative emotions. 

So instead of processing his grief and finding peace, he latches onto Padme. This attachment he will never abandon. He trains harder and becomes more powerful to always be able to keep Padme alive. The guilt Anakin feels for not being able to save his mother gives fire and passion to his obsession with Padme. And this obsession slowly erodes their relationship. 

Anakin says things like “There’s nothing more important than the way I feel about you.” (Hostage Crisis) During the Mortis Arc when he sees a vision of his mother, they have this conversation: 

“The only love I feel in my heart is haunted by what would happen should I let go.” 

“Then it is not love. It is a prison.” 

“But I have a wife…she’s everything to me.” 

“She’s not your destiny.” 

“But I love her.” 

We see the very ugly side of Anakin’s obsession and jealousy in the arcs that involve Clovis. Anakin's insecurities are valid, but they simply drive home the point that his attachment to Padme will eventually unravel him and lead to violence. 

Anakin and Obi-wan have a very interesting conversation during the episode “The Rise of Clovis” that reveals that Obi-wan is worried for Anakin and senses Anakin’s anger pitted towards the man he perceives as his rival. 

Obi-wan: Master Yoda is feels that your judgements concerning Rush Clovis are clouded. 

Anakin: I believe he can’t be trusted.

Obi-wan: Yes, but there is more isn’t there? I sense a deep anger in your by my simply saying his name. 

Anakin: He almost got Senator Amidala killed and I would have been responsible. 

Obi-wan: The Senator has risked her life many times. She’s quite capable of taking care of herself. 

Anakin: They had a relationship...once. I simply feel she is vulnerable to her emotions. 

Obi-wan: She is, or you? 

Obi-wan then empathizes with Anakin, telling him that he knows what it’s like to harbor feelings for someone. He tells Anakin to not be ashamed of these feelings, but that he must make the rights choice “for the order”. The conversation ends with Anakin becoming very angry, asserting he knows what his responsibilities are and Obi-wan leaves the room, leaving Anakin to deal with his distress alone. 

 And since Anakin is denied the support he needs, he resorts to controlling, intimidating behavior. He commands Padme to stay away from Clovis, is cruel to him, and chooses to punish Padme emotionally for Anakin's own insecurities. When tensions reach their peak, he attacks Clovis. This fully expresses Anakin's own fear and rage at the idea of losing Padme to another man. 

Anakin’s unchecked and untreated attachment to Padme, as we all know, results in the ultimate ruination of the both of them, the Jedi Order, and the Republic. He will never out anything about her. She is his center. Nothing else matters. 

This is not Anakin’s fault. This is the fault of the Jedi. Their teachings about attachment are unhelpful at best, and this stems from their crippling confusion over the difference between “attachment” and “love”. 

It makes me wonder if they even know what they are talking about at all. Their advice about attachment involves regurgitating confusing platitudes.  

In “The Revenge of the Sith"; Anakin goes to Yoda to seek his counsel. Anakin is told that “attachment leads to jealousy. The shadow of greed that is.” When Anakin asks what he must do to overcome attachment, Yoda tells him simply to “train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose”. 

Thanks Yoda, I’ll get right on that. 

Anakin needs to “let go”, apparently, and if he is holding onto something dangerous, what should he be holding onto instead? No one ever explains. The Jedi simply tell him to “let it go”. 

It’s no wonder that Anakin can’t ever consider letting go of Padme. For all he knows, that means cutting her out of his life and never speaking to her again. Or worse, does that mean letting her die the next time her life is in danger? Does it mean he should replace love with indifference? He has no idea. As he is given no tools, Anakin fixes nothing and plummets to his unavoidable demise.

Divorce papers and deleting Padme’s number isn’t how Anakin is to overcome “attachment”, and it was never going to be. Obi-wan tried this method with Satine, and though he didn’t fall to the dark side, he never recovers from the bitterness and regret he feels.

In “Voyage of Temptation”, Anakin and Obi-wan discuss his and Satine’s relationship. Obi-wan explains his Jedi duties forced him to leave Satine after forming a strong bond and love with her over the year they were together on Mandalore. The Jedi teachings dictate that he let Satine go. So, obedient Padiwan that he was, Obi-wan cuts off his relationship with Satine. The results show that this was not the way. If the goal of the Jedi is to avoid negative emotion, then this technique fails and perhaps cripples Obi-wan forever.

Anakin: “As Master Yoda says: ‘A Jedi must not form attachments.’”

Obi-wan: “Yes, but he usually leaves out the undercurrent of remorse.” 

I’m here to tell you today that Obi-wan perhaps gets screwed over by the Jedi Code more than any other Jedi. Obi-wan does not have an attachment to Satine. Sure he says “Had you said the word, I would have left the Jedi Order” but that’s only because that is what he has been taught. He is taught you only have two options: love someone or be a Jedi. 

Obi-wan loves Satine. He has a relationship with her. Some even think, myself included, that he is physically intimate with her. Qui-gon no doubt encouraged this relationship. He probably carefully nurtured Obi-wan during this time, helping him be able to love without forming an attachment. But Obi-wan is not able to see that he could love Satine and still be a Jedi. Leaving the order means that his Jedi journey would be over. If he had realized love and attachment are separate things, he could have been a Jedi and could have had Satine's love, too . 

Qui-Gon nearly convinces Obi-wan to be different: Obi-wan could have been a Jedi with feelings and love. Satine is a person who values duty above all, just as Obi-wan does. She respects that he answers to the Force. They would have been able to perfectly rule together with that mutual understanding. He could have been her force wielding husband without being attached to Satine and falling to the Dark side. 

True attachment is so dangerous to a Jedi because if they attach to a person, an idea, or a cause then they are not attached to the will of the Force. 

This is the missing detail Anakin and Obi-wan needed. Obi-wan could have been completely attached to the Force, even while loving Satine and even becoming her husband. Anakin needs to know that he could attach his center to the Force, and that this would not interfere with a deep and meaningful relationship with Padme. While centered in the Force, Anakin could be Padme’s husband loving and living with her, but ultimately his duty is to the Force, just as her duty is ultimately to the Republic. 

We know all of this is possible because of two characters from Star Wars: Rebels. Kanan Jarrus and Hera Syndulla share what is essentially a marital bond. They love, live, and lead together. They are physically intimate, but they do not have each other as their centers. We see evidence of this in the episode “Call to Action”, when Hera leaves Kanan in the hands of the Empire. She  knows that if she risks saving Kanan then everyone else will be killed. 

If Hera had an attachment to Kanan like Anakin had to Padme, she would have risked everything to get Kanan back. Since Hera is not one of the most powerful Jedi in the galaxy, she would have failed and the rebel cell would have been stopped dead in its tracks. 

We also see evidence that Kanan is not attached to Hera. At the very end of their journey, after Kanan and Hera have fully expressed their feelings to each other, Kanan sacrifices himself for Hera and the others by using the Force to hold back an explosion. Though it appears as  Kanan is doing this because of his love for Hera, that is not the true motivation. If Kanan has an attachment to Hera, things would have gone differently. 

It is heavily implied leading up to this event that Kanan knows it is the will of the Force that he is to die. He knows this because the Force is his center and not  Hera. If his center is attached to Hera, I believe two things would have happened. Kanan would have tried and failed to save himself along with Hera and the others.  His actions would have been motivated by selfishness and desperation to extend his time with Hera. If Kanan tries to save himself, the conflagration consumed them all. The only way Kanan can prevent this is to draw upon the dark side of the Force. This would have thrown Kanan out of balance with the Force, and put him in very real danger of falling to the dark side. 

Instead, Kanan allows the will of the Force be done: he dies and his time with Hera comes to an end. Hera knows this about Kanan, and has always accepted the possibility he would choose the Rebel cause over their time together. Kanan knows the same of Hera. This mutual respect is the foundation of their love for each other. A Jedi can have a love and a bond with someone as long as they understand that ultimately, if the Force wills them to do something they must do it, regardless of how that affects their lives together.

So, can Grogu live like Kanan? The issue with Grogu, however, is that he already has attachment. His center is his adopted father, Din. Grogu is currently like Anakin, and if Din hands Grogu over to Ahsoka, they will have very Anakin-like troubles. From whom is Grogu going to learn? Ahsoka is unable to teach Grogu how to let go of deep attachment and center on the Force. Ezra Bridger can. 

In the second part of this post, I will discuss how Ezra Bridger is one of the most important Jedi who has ever lived, because he will be able to Grogu learn to let go, attach to the force, love and live, and yet do what needs to be done. 

[mahizli]

Small Sips (Beru Whitesun Lars & Obi-Wan Kenobi, 17 BBY)

Art by Amy Radcliffe in Women of the Galaxy, and Part 24 of ‘Sparks of Hope’.

***

Someone was singing softly right above their home.

She could not make out the words – but if there was one thing Beru knew, it was that singing was not something you did, on the Great Chott salt flat. Not without the strength and support of several farmers, and certainly not in the hottest hours of the day.

Singing meant signalling you were there and felt confident – and one had better be sure about it before raising one’s voice.

She knew it wasn’t Owen. First, because Owen was not really the singing type – her husband was quiet, hardworking, and never talked idly. Owen believed in silent, effective actions – and since this was what made you survive here on Tatooine, as Beru well knew, it was one of the reasons she loved him so dearly.

And Owen had left for Anchorhead early in the morning, leaving her alone with Luke – to purchase replacement parts for their eldest vaporator. Her husband never left them without making sure she had a charged rifle ready – and as so often, Beru felt grateful for Owen’s fierce protectiveness.

She looked back at Luke, who was sitting on his rug, playing with the wooden cubes Owen had carved for him, muttering quiet words to himself, and then she climbed the stairs, lightly, rifled firmly poised at her shoulder.

“Sadness… in your eyes… I guess… you heard me cry…”

The voice was soft. Somewhat hypnotic, even, like a lullaby – and it came from the Bantha pens. It was a man’s voice, and the intruder had opened the hatch, gliding inside – well, it seemed they finally had an explanation for their missing Bantha cow.

Beru straightened the rifle against her shoulder, making sure her feet were positioned against a rock so as to avoid most of the recoil.

“Get out of there and show your hands, scum.”

The voice stopped abruptly, and Beru whistled a short tune, watching the Banthas part slowly, their hairy bodies making room for…

“You.”

She was still pointing her rifle at him, but he did not seem to be bothered, facing her quietly with those calm grey eyes she remembered. There was more white in his hair now, and his skin had become tanned like hers, but otherwise he looked almost the same. Light clothes, the same brown cloak that had cradled Luke, bringing life to their barren soil.

“Get out of here, before Owen finds you. He won’t be as forgiving.”

Ben tilted his head, hand finding one of the Bantha’s nuzzle, and she realised his fingers were coated in dry blood.

“What is there to forgive?”

His voice was slightly hoarse – unlike his singing. Like a man unused to talking – and he looked the part, face gaunt and hair slightly too-long.

“Look. I know hunger, and thirst. I can understand you stealing one of our Banthas – after all, it is only fair…”

“No.”

Something steely entered his eyes, and the elder man raised his chin, still facing her and her rifle.

“It is not fair. I am not… stealing Banthas. I am not righting a debt.”

She nodded towards his hand, covered in copper stains.

“I brought her and her youngling back.”

Beru frowned, counting the Banthas – and it was true. They were all there, including the missing cow, and a tiny Bantha calf used that precise moment to make itself known, peering behind his mother’s legs.

“Oh.”

That made her lower her rifle, finally. Because it brought her back to that day – that unique day of them being entrusted with Luke by that very same man, who had called himself a Jedi Master. Anakin’s Master. Telling them a frightening tale of war, and massacre, and Jedi dying because of people he called Sith.

That day, he had asked for them to call him Ben. He had never set foot in their home, telling them all these terrible things outside, under the very same unforgiving suns, eyes empty and voice fading as his story ended.

Owen had been fierce, that day. Had clutched Luke tightly to his chest, not even letting her hold him, and had told Ben to leave and never come back, to keep his Jedi business away from their farm and their lives.

Owen had spat all his sadness and hurt at him – telling him how they had hoped for Anakin to visit, one day. How terrible it had been, to have Shmi captured and Cliegg maimed, only to feel hope once more when Anakin had finally arrived.

“He only talked to us to tell us how utterly unforgivable it had been, to leave Shmi to her fate. How weak we were. We, who had set out with thirty men to bring her back, and came back with four. I head what he said, to that Senator woman. I know what he did. He slaughtered the whole Tusken village – even the children. That’s not weak. That’s… sick. That’s… thinking oneself above others – just like you Jedi do.”

Her husband had been livid with rage, and pain. She had felt him shake, had seen tears spring to Owen’s eyes – and her heart had bled for him. Because Cliegg had died only a few months ago – because Owen wanted children even more than she did, yet never said a word about it, and was fighting a hard battle against himself.

“You won’t come near him. You won’t raise him or teach him your ways. I won’t let you.”

The Jedi – Kenobi, Ben… He had just looked at them, face as pale as Owen’s. And then, he had taken a step back. Then another. And he had bowed, very quietly, casting a last look at Luke – never speaking another word to them.

He had left on an eopie, heading towards the Jundland Wastes, and Owen had not moved until he had vanished, small silhouette melting with the red horizon. Then, and only then, her husband had let her embrace him, still cradling the child, had allowed her to stir his face towards her neck.

And she had felt hot tears against her skin, but not a single sound, as Owen had begun to cry, quietly, shaking with sobs as she held them.

He had not spoken about Ben, later. And she had kept her speculations to herself, as she had unpacked the small bag he had left them, finding baby formula packed neatly along with diapers, clean baby clothes and a soft, blue blanket that smelt of honey and flowers.

Luke had been fed and changed and did not even wake up for hours – Beru had known, then, that it must have been the Jedi’s doing.

And, even on the Great Chott salt flat, you did not point a rifle to a man who cared for children and younglings.

“I think she was looking for a safe place. Her little one was breeching.”

Ben’s raspy voice brought her back to the present, and Beru looked up, facing his bright grey eyes once more.

“She is still hurting a bit. I had to help her, you see… She is still struggling between resenting me and being grateful. Singing calms her down.”

She just nodded, facing this man who had brought her so much purpose and joy, and who could not stay here.

“Do not worry. I am leaving.”

He gently rubbed the Bantha cow’s muzzle, and Beru watched the cow move slowly towards him, pressing her body against his in mute trust.

“You have become quite a friend to her.”

Her voice had softened, and Ben stroked the Bantha one last time, before he left the pen, joining her in the searing heat. He smelt of fresh sweat, of dried blood and of Bantha fur, and she realised his hair was damp with perspiration he could not afford to lose.

“Nana?”

The voice rising behind them was tiny and high-pitched, and Luke soon climbed out of the stairs, toddling towards her with childish glee.

“Nana, down. Much sun. Come play. Oh.”

Luke’s oh was the perfect sound for astonishment as he spotted Ben, and the little boy let out a giggle as his eyes found Ben’s hands.

“Di-tty. Di-tty hands. Wash, Nana?”

“You want to wash Ben’s hands, Lukka? Shall we show him where the fresher is, then? And serve him some water, because it is hot?”

“There’s no need, truly…”

“Wash.”

Luke’s voice was decided, and the little one toddled towards Ben, absolutely fearless, small hand fisting itself on the hem of his robe.

“Oh. Dolo. Dolo, Dolo, Dolo!”

“Yes, Lukka. Dolo is back. Ben brought her back.”

Luke looked up at Ben and flashed him a radiant smile. And she watched the Jedi’s eyes slowly fill with tears, but he never turned his head and just smiled back at the child, very gently.

“Up.”

Luke extended his arms towards Ben, and Ben shook his head, softly.

“No, little one. Like you said, my hands are dirty.”

“Up!”

Luke tugged at Ben’s robe, and the Jedi looked at her, hesitance obvious in his eyes. She nodded, smiling slightly, and Ben curled his hands up in his sleeves, careful not to smear anything on Luke’s thin tunic as he finally picked him up, allowing the little boy to nestle against his chest.

“I am not staying.”

Ben’s voice was anxious behind her, as Beru led him down, guiding him towards a chair.

“I cannot stay here.”

Luke was playing with his damp strands of hair, still pressed against his chest, making soft, cooing sounds, and he was rubbing the child’s back, forgetting about the dried blood on his hands, yet still muttering the same words, on and on.

“I cannot stay here. I cannot stay here.”

She placed a glass of water before him, then she wetted a cloth and gently placed it on his neck.

“Shh. Small sips. You can leave when it is cooler.”

She wetted another cloth and sat herself next to him, extending a hand towards him. And, after a few seconds, he mirrored the gesture, allowing her to take his fingers into hers. His skin was clammy, surprisingly cold, and she gently began to clean his palm, then his knuckles and fingers.

“Nana wash hands”, Luke murmured, somewhat sleepily, and Ben let out a small sigh ending in a long, shuddering breath.

“Shh. Let me. You just take small sips.”

He obeyed, as soon as his hand was cleaned, gently moving Luke to the crook of his other arm, raising the glass to his lips. And as she cleaned his other hand, she watched her little son fall asleep against his shoulder, and colour return slowly to his cheeks and face.

She checked the wet cloth on his neck, found it dry and wetted it again. He was not sweating anymore and when she took his hand in hers once more, his skin was warmer.

“Sun sickness.”

Ben’s voice was still rough, but he was shaking his head, quietly.

“I… It still hits me, sometimes. I am sorry.”

“You come from a colder planet, don’t you? Somewhere with water. You’re like a Funnel flower. Perking up whenever there’s moisture.”

He smiled softly at this, fingers drawing small circles into Luke’s back.

“Indeed. The sun does not agree with me. Especially when it has a twin. I need to go, Beru. I am not supposed to be here.”

“Owen will understand. He sounds rougher than he is.”

“It is not that… There are… people out there. Searching for me. Searching for Luke. Your husband was right, wanting me as far away as possible. I have already stayed longer than I should.”

“Well, I am not letting you. You are a Jedi, aren’t you? You can sense things going awry. Shmi told me you could. And that you can feel the Force. So… I think you should ask the Force what is better: getting even sicker because you are too stubborn to take a moment to cool down, or stay here and finish your song for Lukka… And that is the end of it.”

He stayed silent for a while, and then he had a soft, very private laugh.

“You know, Beru… You sound an awful lot like someone I knew.”

“Very well. As long as it makes you reasonable.”

He laughed again, very softly. And he stayed seated for two hours, gently cradling Luke against him, until the heat receded, singing softly to her boy, helping her to chop tubers like an old friend.

They did not talk. Not really.

Not about Anakin, or Shmi. Not about the Jedi.

They talked about Tatooine, and plants, and Beru’s small hydroponic garden she was strangely proud to show to Ben, watching his eyes lighten in genuine pleasure and love, as he caressed the small green Funnel blossoms.

He left before Luke woke up, stretching the child on his cot with utmost care, accepting the bag full of tubers and the bottle of water Beru packed for him.

“Thank you for Dolo”, she told him.

“Thank you for… these two hours”, he answered, very softly. “For… letting me hold him. For the water. And the Funnel blossoms. It means… it means more than the world to me. I won’t come back, though.”

“I know.”

She walked up the stairs behind him and watched him draw his robe around his body.

“Goodbye, Ben. Take care.”

“May the Force be with you, Beru.”

He soon became a tiny dot in the desert, melting with the horizon once more. And she smiled, trying to imagine him coming home, unpacking his bag like she had, almost three years ago.

She hoped the Funnel seeds she had slid between the tubers would please him – and grow into beautiful flowers, bestowing some green he so clearly craved.

“May the Force be with you, Ben.”

She watched the horizon, for a while more. And then she turned, walking down the stairs once more. She had tubers to roast, a little boy to feed and to tend to, and a tired husband who would soon come home. Her small world was there, busy and filled with love – and for this, Beru was forever grateful.

[tennessoui]

Mobi wan stressing about Anakin wanting to leave him (both before and after they get married) and then kuwsk obi wan stressing about Anakin wanting to move out (both the Thanksgiving incident and the router incident) like man being afraid of being left behind is really an integral part of the infinite sadness and I am feeling it bigtime

🥺 oh no you're right this is part of infinite sadness and that's really sad 🥺🥺 i have this sorta related scene from KUWSK that's planned out where Anakin and Obi-Wan (post final kiss in the classroom) talk about their relationship going forward now that they know they're in love and it's a relief but it's also just all new kinds of vulnerable.

This was supposed to be a snippet and in Kit fashion it's 1.3 words i blame the fact that i was listening to @usetheforce 's beautiful KUWSK playlist . Anyway this is an exposition on the fear of being left behind something something how love is trusting the person you love that they won't leave you, even if you don't know why 🥺

Obi-Wan feels silly for having his arms crossed. It's not like this is a fight. They're not fighting. They're telling each other their secrets. They're telling each other their dreams, their hopes, their feelings. It's not a fight, but Obi-Wan feels like his crossed arms are the only thing holding his body together.

Anakin doesn't look much better. He's staring resolutely down at the carpet between his feet. He's sprung for a nice hotel room for this. He's also sprung for a double, probably so Obi-Wan doesn't feel pressured.

All Obi-Wan feels is love for this man, hopeless, endearing, enduring love.

But Anakin is right. Love is one thing. A kiss in a classroom with an audience is one thing.

Attempting to rearrange their entire lives--that's another thing. There are people at stake. The twins. There's more here than love. There's so much that can go wrong.

Anakin knows that too, that's why he hasn't looked Obi-Wan in the eye since he stuttered out his own version of I'm in love with you.

That's why they're here in this nice hotel room, thirty minutes from home. That's why they're doing this here and not in the house, so if this doesn't--if they can't--if they decide not to--

Then hopefully they won't think about this moment every time they step through the front door.

If they stand on the precipice and decide to walk backwards, to not fall off that ledge, then they still need to be able to return home. They still need to be able to look each other in the eyes.

Obi-Wan’s said his bit. Obi-Wan’s said everything he knows how to say. I’m in love with you, for a start. You have given me more than I have ever thought I wanted, let alone needed. But the truth was I needed all of it. I still do. I have a home now. That’s priceless. There’s no equivalent that I can give you in exchange. Everything I am and will be and have become is already yours. Because I love you and I had not even noticed because it just made sense. Loving you has always made more sense than not loving you.

Not in those words, of course.

But Obi-Wan’s said his bit, and Anakin’s said his too, and now there’s no more secrets.

There’s just a decision to make.

Obi-Wan uncrosses his arms and sits on the end of the bed next to Anakin, two feet of space between them. “So then,” he says.

“Do we?” Anakin finishes the thought, half-turning towards Obi-Wan to throw him a sad little smirk.

“Yes,” Obi-Wan admits. “Do we?”

“Is it bad that a huge part of me wants to say. Let’s do it. Damn the future?” Anakin asks with a huff of a laugh.

“Of course not,” Obi-Wan reassures him, reaching across the bed to rest a hand on his knee. “I would say that I understand the impulse. Damn the future. I love you. You love me--” he says these words wondrously. He still can’t quite believe they’re true, that Anakin means them the same way Obi-Wan does. “Let’s move in together.”

Anakin shoots him an incredulous look and lets out a genuine snort. “But I know...we shouldn’t do that.”

Obi-Wan fights his every impulse to retract his hand from Anakin’s knee. He knows the words have a certain truth to them. He knows what Anakin’s thinking of. He knows he has a point. It still hurts to hear. “We need to talk about it,” he says diplomatically.

“Talk about it?” Anakin sounds hurt. “Why? We both already know. What if--what if we were to--to date, to try and make this work and then we can’t? Obi-Wan, the twins love you. They love you. They’re--you’re their other parent. They need a stable home environment, they--if we--if we try and we can’t do it, then what happens to them? What happens to you and them?”

They’re worries that Obi-Wan has thought of himself ever since the kiss this morning. But it feels different to hear them in Anakin’s voice, to hear them spoken out loud. If Obi-Wan and Anakin dated and then broke up, they probably couldn’t continue living together. Obi-Wan tries to imagine living with Satine in the months following the divorce papers being signed, but he can’t.

He knows people do it. He knows himself well enough to know that he wouldn’t be able to. If Anakin were to break up with him--the only way Obi-Wan can imagine their relationship ending--Obi-Wan would need months if not years before he was able to look him in the eye again. If ever, actually.

If Anakin were to break up with him--to hold everything Obi-Wan is in his hands and cast it aside for something else, like Satine had, like...like his father had, then Obi-Wan would not be able to see him everyday without breaking down into tears and begging him for a second chance, for a detailed list of all the things that he did wrong, all the things about himself that were so wrong that no one can stand to stay for long.

“If,” Anakin says, breaking the silence when it’s clear Obi-Wan isn’t going to say anything. “If we try and then you...you leave, I don’t--”

He stops himself and clears his throat, shaking his head and looking down at his hands. “Obi-Wan, it’d break my heart.”

Obi-Wan stares at him for a second, confused and mouth slightly open. Anakin sounds as if he’s operating under some serious misconceptions.

As if Obi-Wan would be the one to leave. Obi-Wan can’t imagine there’s anything Anakin could ever do in order to make him want to leave. It’s Anakin. Seven months ago, before Obi-Wan even realized he was in love with the man, he’d gotten wine drunk with Padme Amidala and asked her quite insistently how the fuck she could have turned Anakin down, not once--but twice.

It’s Anakin.

And if...if Anakin is half as sure as he sounds that the only way they would ever break up is if Obi-Wan decided to leave, then...then maybe it’s worth jumping off that precipice. Damn the future.

But Obi-Wan thinks maybe this future won’t be so bad at all.

It’s a strange kind of numb bravery that has him moving his hand from Anakin’s knee to his palm. “Anakin,” he says quietly, and he feels as if he’s watching this happen from someone else’s point of view. Surely this isn’t Obi-Wan Kenobi about to put his heart firmly and resolutely into another’s hands. Not after last time.

But the truth is, it’s been there for years already. It’s about trust. It’s about trusting Anakin to always think that Obi-Wan could leave and never entertain the possibility that he could.

“Anakin,” he says again, until Anakin looks up at him from beneath his lashes. It’s suddenly not enough for him. He wants closer. He wants his turn to kiss Anakin and mean it.

He leans slowly in, raising his other hand to tilt Anakin’s chin up to meet his mouth. He’s giving Anakin plenty of room to move away, but Anakin doesn’t. Anakin stays.

Maybe it’s time they start giving each other more credit for that.

He feels his eyelashes flutter closed just as his lips touch Anakin’s so carefully it’s hardly a kiss at all. Butterfly wings have more substance than this kiss, but Obi-Wan would not change it for the world. Anakin needs to know they can go slow, that they can be gentle with each other. Anakin needs to know that Obi-Wan will never hurt him.

Anakin needs to know that--

“If I were capable of ever, ever leaving you,” Obi-Wan murmurs, pulling back until their lips are just brushing with every word and opening his eyes just enough to see the perfect picture Anakin makes like this, “I would have done so when Luke was going through that phase where he insisted upon only eating orange foods.”

Anakin’s eyes flutter open in shock and then the words register, and the meaning behind them does as well. Slowly, a sort of breathless smile breaks across his face.

It’s the most beautiful thing Obi-Wan has ever seen.

[write4tomorrow]

First Meeting

Word Count: 1891

Pairing: Sith!Obi-Wan Kenobi x Jedi Reader

Summary: Master Kenobi fell from the Jedi order many years ago, but that doesn’t mean he hasn’t kept close tabs on the jedi order since. As Darth Dominus, he has furthered the separatists agenda for most of the clone war but recently his attention has been consumed by something else. During his extensive studying in his padawan days, Kenobi learned what a dyad in the force was, but he never imagined being half of a whole. Could he be? 

Genre: Angst / Fluff

The war will come to an end soon, you knew that. The Jedi would return to being true peacekeepers and your life would become one of meditation and order. There would be no more covert meetings and no more negotiations between the Jedi, senators and Separatists.

Now, however, you were crouched behind shipping containers on a large Separatist ship. The lights were off and every move you made seemed to echo in the vast room. 

“Hello there,” the darkness purred. You stayed still but cursed yourself for not realizing someone else was in the room with you. The words of Senator Riyo Chuchi came to mind in that moment: promise you’ll be careful. These people will not fight fairly. She spoke those words to you just as she climbed into an escape pod and left you. 

You were supposed to accompany Senator Chuchi to a meeting about a Separatist weapon on a planet near Naboo. During your journey, the senator’s ship was taken by Separatist forces. Pulled in by a tractor beam, you had limited options and even fewer odds for success. Fortunately, you were able to cause enough of a distraction for the senator and her party to evacuate via escape pod. During the distraction, though, you were forced to stay behind on the Separatist carrier. 

You had no chance of fighting your way out. Instead, you had chosen to search the carrier for a smaller, one person ship to make an escape. Everything seemed to be going well until you tripped an alarm in the bottom sectors of the ship. The droids had backed you into a large storage room with towering stacks of different goods that were being transported. There were large boxes of all sizes stored here, and you had no trouble in finding a place to hide. The room reminded you of a maze and you hoped that you would be able to make a clean escape. 

Still, despite everything, you knew that this is what you were best at. The Jedi were supposed to be peacekeepers, but you were an excellent soldier and general. 

“I can hear your heart beating from here,” a whispered voice surrounded you in the dark. Something sinister seemed to creep along the back of your robes. Your hand went to your saber, but you withheld from igniting it. 

“Little one, stop hiding and come out. I am the only thing standing between you and the droids on the other side of that wall,” the voice sounded coaxing, welcoming. You stood, keeping your back to the shipping container and one hand on your lightsaber hilt.

“Well, hello there, master y/f/n y/l/n,” the voice said. You felt the ghost of a voice against your ear. You almost leaned into the feeling but you were startled by the sound of a saber igniting, filling the space with red light. 

“I’ve waited quite some time to meet you. Master y/n,” the Sith in front of you crooned, “the holograms of you do not do you justice.” You recognized the man in front of you: fallen Jedi master and now poster boy for the Sith, Darth Dominus stood grinning before you. You’ve never encountered him in person, but you had seen countless holograms of him. In fact, you had watched practically every hologram of Darth Dominus that you could get your hands on. His fighting tactic was immaculate, his swordsmanship was impressive and his demeanor was perfect in the middle of a fight. Still, you knew there was something else about him that caught your interest. You couldn’t explain it but every time you heard his name or saw a projection of his face, a small feeling inside of you began to stir.  

You watched him now, trying to put the strange feeling in your chest to rest. He seemed to notice your internal struggle, and his smile only widened. His golden eyes reflected the red lightsaber in his hands. You lit your own saber and positioned yourself for a fight. Dominus only laughed. 

“Master Kenobi,” you chose to use his Jedi name in the hopes of rattling him, “I’m afraid I’ve lost senator Chuchi. If you let me go, I would be happy to go find her.” 

“This was never about the senator,” he began to slowly move towards you.  

“Oh no? You’re not scared the senator would find out about the separatists’ new weapon?” You watched Darth Dominus’ face as it took on a hungry quality. You recognized it as you’d seen it on your own face when you were feeling restless. You felt it when meditation and peace wouldn’t quell the part of you that enjoyed games of strategy. 

“Why would I want the senator when I could get my hands on the Jedi order’s most talented negotiator? The tireless general that never seems to rest in battle?” Dominus moved towards you at a leisurely stroll, not even raising his ignited saber. You tried to speak, but he held up his hand and continued. 

“I’ve been watching you for some time. Your actions on the battlefield have often left the Separatist army - my army - in pieces. I must say that even I am impressed.”

“That’s some high praise from a Sith. But I’m sorry to say, Master Kenobi, that you’ve left me wanting.” You made your move then. With a faint to your left and a sudden sprint to your right, you tried to move past the Sith lord before he trapped you. Dominus was quick, though. He made a lunge towards you, not with his saber but with his open hand. He reached towards you but his fingers only grazed the fabric of your shirt. With your back to the escape route, you turned on Dominus and brought your saber down in a wide swing. He was so close to you now that you could feel the buzz of his saber. 

He dodged your swing and used the force to shove you back several paces. You fell back as you tripped over some smaller boxes. Scrambling to your feet, you heard Dominus coming towards you.

“You will not win here,” Dominus used the force to push you back farther, forcing you to fall to the ground. “You’re in a foreign space, you’re practically blind as you fight in the dark and you can’t win against me.” You weren’t going to give up easily. You rolled to your side and began to swing your saber as you made your way towards the Sith. To your surprise, Dominus turned his saber off. 

You froze, unsure what was happening. The space around you was filled only with your saber’s light. You could see Dominus’ eyes appraise you as you stood ready for battle. 

“You are hungry for a fight, aren’t you little one?” He used your momentary confusion to lift you off your feet with the force. You cursed yourself and tried to fight against the weightless feeling, but it did nothing. 

“Why aren’t you fighting me? I won’t tell you anything and I won’t-” you were cut off as you felt pressure around your throat build. 

Dominus chuckled as he pulled you down, forcing you into a kneeling position. With a cry, he grabbed your hand that was still clutching your lightsaber. He squeezed until you let it fall from your grip. It hit the floor and Dominus picked it up and attached it to his own hip. 

“Now that we’re being sensible,” He got down on one knee before you. With his own lightsaber hilt, he tilted your chin up to look at him. You tried to struggle against the invisible weight holding you in place. 

“I’ll happily accept your surrender,” You hiss through your teeth. Dominus let out a laugh that filled the large room. 

“Anakin trained you well,” Dominus admitted, “But you aren’t like him, you aren’t like the Jedi. I’ve been watching you and I can see how much you live for this war.” 

“I’m not like you,” you answered. You could feel where this conversation was going. Perhaps, you enjoyed being in the middle of a fight, but that didn’t mean you wanted war. You didn’t want to be an agent of chaos like the fallen Jedi before you. 

“You would be so much happier if you accepted it, y/n.” He was looking at you now with something you didn’t recognize. Was it hope?

“I can’t be here-” You let out a breath, the words falling out of your mouth. Of course you couldn’t be here, with a Sith lord. He was the enemy. 

“You feel it too,” Dominus let out a laugh, he seemed almost relieved. He leaned back and looked at you. 

“If you let me go, Master Kenobi,” You began, but Dominus only smiled like he knew a joke you’d never understand. He leaned towards you and rested his palm against your cheek.

“Darling, I’m not forcing you to stay here.” At his words, you realize that there was nothing holding you to the ground. You froze, understanding the depth to which you were distracted. How long have you been able to stand? 

You stood and Dominus rose with you. His hand fell from your face, but he grabbed your arm instead. With almost no room between the two of you, Dominus’ breath mixed with yours. 

“You and I are destined to be together,” Dominus whispered. You felt his free hand move towards your waist, but it never quite connected. He seemed to be waiting on something, a response from you or perhaps an outright denial. You held yourself still but could not allow yourself to give in. Not yet. 

And to your dismay, Dominus nodded and lowered his hand. 

“There is a vent in the back corner of this room,” Dominus said, pulling away, “if you crawl through, take two left turns and a final right. You’ll find the escape pods.” You stared at him a moment longer before taking a step back, reeling. He took your lightsaber from his hip and tossed it to you. As you began to back away, you found yourself smiling.

“Don’t worry, Master Kenobi,” You said over your shoulder as you turned away, “I’ll make sure to keep your little loss here a secret. I wouldn’t want anyone to ruin your reputation.” 

“That’s some big talk, y/n. Next time we meet, I’ll put that pretty mouth of yours to work,” Dominus said as you left, “and, I like it when you call me Master.” You laughed as you found the vent Dominus was talking about. Your escape was smooth sailing thereafter. 

❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋

Later, as you sat on the escape pod, waiting for someone to pick up your distress call, you tried to meditate. You were shaken by your encounter with the Sith lord. Something small and otherwise strange inside of you had finally snapped into place. What was this feeling? 

You were pulled out of your meditation when you thought you heard something from the shadows of the escape pod. However, when you looked, you found nothing. There was no one on this pod with you. That didn’t stop you from thinking you saw someone from the corner of your eye. 

Next time you see Master Yoda, said a familiar voice in your head, ask him what a dyad in the force is. The voice echoed and then faded from your mind but you knew where it came from. You had heard that voice a million times over the holograms. You would know Darth Dominus anywhere. 

But what was worse was that you knew what a Force Dyad was. You had known for a long, long time. 

Part 2!

A/N: Um... so I love writing Sith!Obi-Wan? Anyway, thank you for reading! Please let me know what you think! More to come later. 

[ct7567329]

Wounded: Jesse x Reader

It was just like every other mission. Prior to departure, the boys of the 501st awaited in their barracks for their next orders as the Jedi Generals were debriefed. This was typically a rowdy experience. Arm wresting, sneaking some liquor, listening to music, anything to get their minds off the reality of war that was just moments away. But unlike most times, Jesse found himself sitting on his bunk, leaning against the cold wall, lost in his thoughts.

"You've gotta let it go," Fives groaned, playfully pushing Jesse's shoulder with one hand, a bottle on whiskey in the other.

Jesse rolled his eyes and looked away from his tipsy brother, pretending he wasn't even there.

Fives handed the bottle to Hardcase, "Jesse look, (Y/N) is an amazing girl. But, she's a Jedi. She honors her code. There's so many wonderful girls out there. So many that aren't her. I hate telling you this, I really do, but sometimes, it hurts more to hold on."

Jesse gulped and bowed his head, "It's not that easy."

"You two have a special relationship. She says things to you that she's never said to any of us. You clearly mean a lot to her. I hope that's enough to make you happy," Fives sighed, "Hang in there."

Before Jesse could speak, Rex commanded all the men to the hangar.  It was go time. They all filed into the main hangar awaiting the orders of you and Anakin. You both stood confidently in front of a hologram of the palace in Theed on Naboo. As you began the briefing of the mission, Jesse couldn't help but stare at you through his helmet. You sensed this but continued with the task at hand, pointing to the crucial palace entry ways.

Upon conclusion of the briefing, Fives nudged Jesse and whispered, "Did you even pick up on any of that or were you too busy gawking?". Jesse ignored the statement and made his way to the gunship with the rest of his group, which just so happened to include you.

You spent the majority of the ride sitting down, leaning against the corner, scrolling through miscellaneous battle information on a holopad. The rest of the men were sitting down as well, conversing with each other.

"Hey, you feeling okay?" you asked Jesse, who was sitting next to you.

"Never better," he muttered, biting his lower lip under his helmet.

You weren't buying it, "Well, if you need anything don't hesitate." You sprung up and got ready for landing, leaving Jesse alone with his thoughts.

"It looks like the seppies already started attacking," you announced, "stand by for arrival."

You definitely weren't wrong about that. The gunship doors opened to absolute hell. Shots going in all directions, countless droids, and a droid barrier in front of the palace entrance. Across the landing bay, it was obvious Anakin was distraught about the idea of his wife being stuck inside.

It didn't take long for the 501st to break through the blockade at the entrance, but it was only worse inside. You ordered a split off, with you, Jesse and a few others taking the west wing. You looked over your shoulder and only saw five men. This would never be enough. Your group pushed forward, leaving only seven destroyers to decimate before conquering the wing. One of your men knew what he had to do.

"For the 501st!" he screamed, throwing charges at the destroyers. Knowing how heavy the explosion would be, you fell to the ground and covered your ears. Unfortunately, you were the only one to think to do that. Once the charges exploded, you got up and looked around. All the men were knocked on the ground. Quickly, you approached each solider, ripping off their helmet and taking their pulse.

There were no survivors, until you got to Jesse. You held your breath as you removed his helmet and placed two fingers on his neck. A pulse was there, faint, but there. You picked him up and put him over your shoulder, thanking your Jedi training for providing you with extra upper body strength. Only a few floors up there was a suite which Senator Amidala always let you stay in when on Naboo. You found the nearest elevator and made your way up there, hoping to not run into any droids. To your luck, the elevator doors opened and your hope came true. You hastily made your way to the suite and let yourself in, laying Jesse's limp body on the bed.

Figuring he just had the wind knocked out of him, you began to remove his upper armor to relieve weight off his chest. Starting with his pauldron, and finishing with the gloves. Sighing, you looked at the beaten up ARC. His underlies were dark, heavy, evident of stress. You caressed his cheek, acknowledging how soft it was. Freshly shaved. He would eventually be okay.

"Vaabir nayc chaabar a kebi. Anay kebi Kelir cuyir jate," you softly hummed over and over again, watching his chest slowly rise and fall. You placed a gentle kiss on his forehead and got off the bed,  going to the refresher for a much needed shower.

Upon finishing your shower, you dressed in only undergarments and a short silk robe. It was the only things you could find that were suitable for you. You exited the refresher and went to towards the vanity, beginning to comb through your wet hair.

"General?"

You quickly turned around to see a confused Jesse staring at you.

"What happened?" he asked, shaking slightly. You threw your hair up into a low bun and sat on the edge of the bed.

"There was a pretty bad explosion. Lost everyone, except you. I figured I would bring you here. The Senator usually lends me this room while I'm on Naboo. Didn't want to see anything worse happen to you.

Jesse couldn't help but stare at your glowing skin, watching a single drop of water trail down you arm, "Thank you," he whispered, still in his trance.

"Would you like to freshen up?" you asked, "A warm shower might help you feel better."

He nodded and attempted to get out of the bed, grunting in pain. You rushed to his side and put your arm around his back, "Jesse?"

"I'm sorry General. Just some pain in my back. I've got this," he confirmed, trying to get up again.

"I'll leave some fresh clothes out for you, just holler if you need anything!" you smiled as he hobbled to the refresher.

The second the door locked, you sprung off the edge of the bed and rushed to the mirror. "oh maker," you said under your breath, looking at how disastrous you looked. With one swift motion you took the bun out and combed your hair straight, parting it perfectly in the middle. You dug through the drawers, trying to find anything to make you feel more confident. First,  you found some mens clothing. You put the sweatpants and t shirt next to the refresher door then continued to search for something for yourself. All you could find was a perfume bottle, and dark blue lace under garments. Was this too revealing, absolutely, but it was better than what you had on. You changed and sprayed yourself a few times before sitting back down on the bed, turning something random on on the holovision. Patiently, you sat there and watched until Jesse was finished.

Not too long after you finished up, the water turned off and Jesse opened the door to grab the clothes. When he walked out of the refresher your eyes widened.

"Is something wrong General?" he asked nervously.

You stuttered, "No, but, well, we aren't on the battle field, you can call me (Y/N), but I've just never seen you in civilian clothes. It's so, so different."

Jesse stood there for a moment, silent. "Is that bad or-"

"Oh no. It's actually kind of nice," you interrupted him, "really nice."

Jesse was motionless, standing speechless. "Oh my bad!" you finally let out, getting off the bed and sitting on the nearby futon. "Take the bed, you need it!"

He looked down and walked towards the bed, laying down then sighing, "Do the rest of the men know where we are?"

"Yeah, I let Anakin know what happened and he knows you're here with me. Kix is a little overwhelmed with injuries right now."

"Good," he nodded, wincing in pain.

You noticed the wince and shot up, rushing to his side, "What hurts?"

"My side," he grunted, grabbing his ribs.

"Mind if I take a look?" you asked, pressing your lips together.

"Yeah, go a head," he nodded, taking off his shirt, then laying back down.

Your lips parted as you stared at his bare chest. His extra hours lifting at the gym were evident. You put your hand on his chest and dragged your fingers down to his stomach.

"Gene-(Y/N)?" he asked, confused with what you are doing.

You stopped in your tracks, "Oh right, yes, I am so sorry. I just. Yeah. Lemme take a look at that." Your cheeks flushed pink as you examined his side, realizing he definitely has a broken rib. As you were attending to his wounds, he couldn't help but stare at your robe, which was becoming loose, revealing a portion of cleavage. He swallowed hard, and began to breathe heavy. Jesse was in complete awe that this was actually happening.

"(Y/N)," he finally let out, causing you to direct your attention to his face.

You hummed in response. He tilted his head slightly, looking at you in silence.

"Yes, Jesse?" you whispered, inching closer to him.

His gaze was still locked on your eyes. Yours on his. Not even the loudest explosion in the would could break this.

"What are you thinking," you exhaled, moving closer to him yet again.

"Are you getting closer to me?"

"Perhaps."

"I think I want to k-"

"Me too."

His lips met yours with passion. Your lips fit perfectly upon his. As he deepened the kiss, you laid down on your side, moving your leg over his. His hand ran down your back, resting on your thigh that was thrown over his legs.

Jesse pulled away, looking at the beauty in front of him. He removed his hand from your thigh and placed it on your shoulder, which has been exposed by your robe being pulled down every so slightly.

"I've been wanting to tell you this since the moment I saw you,  but, you are so, so, so, unbelievably stunning," he breathed, smiling at the vision of you.

"I can't tell you how long I've wanted to do this," you smiled back, kissing his chest softly.

With each small motion, your robe fell more and more off your shoulder, revealing much more than Jesse though he would ever see.

His stare of love became evident of agony, trying to prevent the urge of a growing heat between his legs.

You softly laughed and gave him another gentle kiss, "If it's bound to happen, let it happen." You removed the rest of your robe, exposing everything that wasn't covered by the lace.

Jesse could no longer hold it and cupped your cheek, passionately bringing you to his lips.

Though his physical wound may take a while to heal, his broken heart was officially mended.

JOIN MY TAGLIST

@ganondorf-has-greasy-balls @lightning-wolffe @jedi-dreea @smellssharpies @hannahjessica113 @gryffindorqueensworld @coffeeandtodd @soclonely @persaloodles @peacelandbread @raf-loves-everything @clone-lover501-212-104 @ahsoka-padme @dangerdumpling @808tsuika @ahsokatano-thetogruta

[kaijusplotch]

Deaging clones fic wip

so this is titled "Rejuvination" and i wanna share this so...ENJOY!

Cody was glad that the latest campaign was over. It had been hell for the 212th and the 501st. While casualties had been low, it was still a blow to each battalion. They felt too much, sometimes, both Rex and himself; as well as their generals. Something heavy was hanging over The Negotiator, and he was sure that was the same over on The Resolute.

“Cody, we need to change course,” Obi-Wan said softly as they stood on the bridge.

“Sir?” Cody frowned worriedly, wondering what it was that pulled his general off of their return route to Coruscant.

Obi-Wan just smiled and patted Cody’s shoulder. “It’s nothing bad. The Force is...pulling me toward something. But it’s a good feeling.”

Cody eyed his general, raising an eyebrow before shaking his head. “Alright. Should we let The Resolute know?”

“Yes, if Anakin hasn’t sensed it as well. There’s a planet that has a strong force presence; a peaceful one. It must be a well of the Force or something like it.”

Cody hadn’t seen his general so relaxed in a long time. If this detour was going to give Obi-Wan a little more peace, then Cody was all for it. He smiled and nodded to Siren. “Send the coordinates to The Resolute. I think we’ve all earned a little detour/shore leave.”

The command center was filled with cheers from the clones, and soft laughs from the nat-born administrators. Some peace and quiet (or as much as Cody could get from some of his men) would be nice. He just hoped Waxer didn’t try to adopt any local wildlife.

The planet was uninhabited by any sentient species, which was a surprise to Cody. The air was safe, even had safe food and water if they wanted to have a snack. What seemed to be what drew the Jedi was a strange abandoned temple. What drew Cody’s, and by extension most of the exhausted 212th and 501st command structure were the hot springs.

“You should enjoy yourselves while here,” Obi-Wan said with a small smile. “The scanners are working on the shuttle; there’s no need to be on edge.”

“Are you sure, sir?” Cody watched his General carefully. He seemed already to be so much more at ease, he wanted to thank whatever deities existed.

“Very. Nothing bad will happen here.” Obi-Wan was so confident in his assessment that Cody had no choice but to have faith in him.

“All right.” Cody sighed and looked up as the sound of another shuttle breaking atmosphere broke the peaceful silence. He smiled, noticing the nose-art of the two LA/ATs settled down besides the 212th. Cody was excited to see his little brother, and hopefully catch up on the chaos that the Domino Squad was no doubt causing.

“Hey Master!” Anakin cried as he jumped from the shuttle, beaming and stretching. Behind him Ashoka was already pulling an exhausted looking Rex from where he had settled.

“Anakin, Ashoka,” Obi-Wan said with a smile as he walked to meet them.

“General, Commander, Rex’ika.” Cody grinned when Rex just glared at him.

“Really, Cody?” Rex grumbled.

“I’ve effectively been given a short term leave by Obi-Wan. I can call you whatever I want.” Cody beamed and punched his brother’s shoulder playfully. He looked up when the rest of the 501st came out, smiling as they mingled with brothers from the 212th.

“You’re right, Master. This place feels...so bright and light!” Ashoka smiled and closed her eyes as she stood with her masters.

“General Kenobi says there’s nothing here to be worried about, I have to believe him, if only for how much better he looks,” Cody said, smiling at the young Torgruta. “Although I’m more interested in the hot springs.”

“Hot springs?” Anakin and Ashoka asked with bright smiles.

“Sorry, claimed first use,” Rex joined in, looking more eager than he was before.

“I want to meditate anyway first. The old temple is this way.” Obi-Wan beckoned the other two Jedi away and toward the eroded stone ruins on top of the small hill looking over the deeper valley below them.

“I’m up for hot spring dip!” Hardcase chirped beaming and already stripping out of his armor as he hurried away.

“YES! C’mon Boil!” Waxer grabbed his twin and dragged the other ARF trooper toward the several large hot springs tucked close to the mountain side.

Cody snorted and looked to the rest of the troops who were joining in with the rush to fresh hot water. “C’mon. Maybe we can find a pool that won’t be full of chaos.” He pulled Rex along at a more sedated pace, soaking in the good feelings and bright warm sunlight filtering through the trees as they stepped under them.

Already piles of blue and orange-gold armor were on the edges of the pools, with a few piles of blacks already. hanging on low hanging branches. Cody spotted the Domino squad chatting away with Jesse, Kix, Waxer, and Boil. He was glad to see that even with Echo and Fives going off on missions with other units, they were still close with Droidbait, Hevy, and Cutup.

“This one’s small, but no one else is here,” Rex called past a small collection of small shrubs and thin seedlings.

Cody smiled, spotting the ten foot wide pool and nodded. “Brotherly bonding time it is then.” He said smirking and pulling his armor off and piling it to the side, stripping down completely.

“Oh come on, leave your briefs, I don’t want to see your junk, Cody!”

“We have the same junk.” Cody rolled his eyes and tossed his shorts over a branch before walking into the hot water. He hissed a bit before settling down and finding a rock to sit on, leaning back against the edge of the pool with a sigh. “Never knew you’d become such a prude.”

“I have a 14 year old FEMALE Padawan on the ship.” Rex grumbled, settling in next to his brother in his underclothes. “AND she’s here on planet.”

“Oh...kriff, good point.” Cody frowned and stood to turn around. “OI! Someone better be on watch to stop Ashoka from walking in on the sausage festival!” Cody cried to the loud chatter of his brothers. The answering “KRIFF!” explained all he needed, even as he heard water splashing and yelling at brothers to toss each other their shorts.

“See?” Rex tossed Cody’s shorts in his face and smirked.

Cody glared and splashed him back before putting the shorts back on. “Shit head,” he spat, although it just felt good to not be a soldier and just be an older brother.

“Shebs kisser.”

“I know you are but what am I?”

Rex burst out laughing and Cody couldn’t help but join him. It felt good; he felt younger than he had in - well - forever. He held his breath and dunked under the water, rubbing his face.

“Gods this feels so good…” Rex said with a deep sigh.

“Second that, Rex.” Cody leaned his head back, closing his eyes and letting the hot water and the peaceful energy soak into his muscles and bones.

The laughter and splashing of the sixty-some brothers in the other larger pools was a siren song and Cody slowly found himself falling into a restful drifting sleep; even as a few voices sounded slightly different. Nothing bad would happen here. His General promised him.

Obi-Wan wasn’t sure exactly how long he, Anakin, and Ashoka had been meditating, but when he finally felt the gentle caress of awareness brush his consciousness he finally allowed himself to come out of the meditation. Opening his eyes he had to hold a small chuckle at the sight of both his Padawan and grand-padawan sprawled across each other in a peaceful sleep. The lines of stress across their faces were gone; like they never happened. Even their force signatures were lighter and brighter; even the super-nova-like brightness of Anakin’s.

“Anakin, Ashoka,” Obi-Wan gently prodded, poking their feet. He was rewarded by a very classic Anakin whine and grumpy face. Obi-Wan openly laughed at that. It had been so long.

“Ugh! Master, I don’t want to get up!”

“We should, especially if we want to go to the hot springs, Master.” Ashoka slowly uncurled from where she was sleeping and stretched. She looked like a Tooka as she yawned widely and arched her back; another reminder for Obi-Wan of her carnivorous nature.

“I should make sure that the boys are at least decent.” Obi-Wan stood and stretched, feeling his aches gone and his heart lighter. “Come on, both of you up. It’s nearly sundown and we should be getting back to the ships soon.”

He left to the complaints of both of his friends, knowing well that they wouldn’t leave before everyone had had a soak. He wasn’t as cruel as he played. Besides, Obi-Wan hadn’t felt this good in years. The Force was soothing and rejuvenating; lifting the years of weight that seemed to double from the war.

The path down into the small group of trees near was clear of any stones, although the piles of armor that were peeking out from between bushes and shrubs broke up the monotony of neon green and purple. The sound of a panicked scream broke through the peaceful chatter of aves and other creatures, causing anxiety to well in Obi-Wan’s heart.

“Cody?!” Obi-Wan rushed forward, abandoning his outer cloak to the wind. He burst through the bushes that blocked the path and drew his saber, only to stare in shock.

Sixty high ranking clones were staring back at Obi-Wan with wide, slightly shocked, slightly terrified, brown eyes. Most were scrambling to hold up their too-big under clothes as they abandoned the pools, some were swimming in their blacks, some were trying to use their armor to hide their nudity. Cody and Rex were part of the first group, staring up at Obi-Wan. Every single one between the ages of ten and 12.

“Oh dear…”

[alright-anakin]

Always in Time to Save Your Life

I stumbled upon this song on Spotify when I was listening to a radio of my Sky playlist and it gave major Leia forgives Anakin vibes. It’s Only Us from Dear Evan Hansen (great musical btw). This made me think of the fic I’m writing (well it’s fic 3 in priorities, so I’ve got like a paragraph, but I actually have written out an outline for it so I don’t forget what I want to put in it) which is a time-travel one. Leia and Luke travel back in time. Most of the time travel fics I’ve read only have Luke travel back, I think because people think Leia would not want to, or that they wouldn’t know how to write her reluctance or downright dislike of Anakin, but I think that would be a really interesting thing to explore. Anyway, before I give my whole plot away, I will just say that this made me think of Leia’s eventual reconciliation.

Anakin turned away as Obi-Wan left. His thoughts immediately focused back to finding a way to save her. Padmé. He couldn’t trust the Council with this. They would only throw him out of the Order if they knew. And he was fine with that, but he needed to save her first before leaving. He left the Temple and made his way towards her apartment. He chose to walk, wanting to clear his head.

…

“There is something I must attend to.” Ahsoka said, turning away from the robed figure at her side.

“Yes, go after your Master.” Maul murmured. “I will keep an eye on Sidious. We must act quickly before everything comes to fruition.” Ahsoka frowned.

“You still haven’t told me who Sidious is.”

“You never asked.” Maul said simply. It was true. She hadn’t.

“Well who is Sidious?” She turned to look at him, a challenge in her eye.

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.” She glared.

“I think that is for me to decide.”

“You focus on Skywalker. I will handle Sidious.”

“Oh yes, because you have managed him before.” Ahsoka glared at him. Maul clenched his jaw. At that moment, the transport stopped and Ahsoka took a step away from Maul, towards the exit. “Fine. Do your job and I’ll do mine.” She left the transport, stepping into the business of the Coruscant streets. She started to head towards the Temple, her heart thudding in her ears. She wasn’t even sure if she would be allowed back into the Temple. She reached out with the Force, searching for Anakin’s Force signature. After a few minutes, she realized he was not in the Temple, he was on the street, heading right towards her. She continued her path.

She could see him now. He looked...troubled. Her heart squeezed. She could sense something was wrong. Terribly wrong. But she didn’t know what. His mind was clouded. At first she thought he was shielding, from who, she didn’t know, but upon closer inspection, she realized he was not. His inner light was clouded by darkness. Could Maul be right? Was he heading down a darker path? She shook her head. He wouldn’t, she thought stubbornly. And she was simply here to confirm her belief. She needed to draw his attention, before he ran into her. He was not focused at all on where he was going: so tangled in his thoughts, he was.

“Well this is a fine mess you’ve gotten yourself into,” the words left her mouth before she could think of anything better to say. Her mouth pulled into a half smile, the memory of when she had said something very similar to him on a mission.

“I know,” he spoke aloud, but he didn’t seem to realize it. He had slowed his pace but hadn’t looked up. “I don’t know what I’m doing.” The despair rolling off him in waves just about knocked Ahsoka off her feet. She reached out and laid her hand on his shoulder. He looked up then, his eyes focusing on hers. “Ahso—Ahsoka,” he breathed. “What are you—what are you doing here?”

“Let us walk, Master.” She said quietly. “Where are you headed?” He looked down again. She frowned. “Master?” He shook his head to clear it, then continued in the direction that he was walking when she had seen him.

“What are you doing here?” He asked. “I thought you had gone to Mandalore.”

“I did.”

“Well?”

“I dueled with Maul.” She looked away, not wanting him to see the pain in her eyes as she remembered Maul’s warning. His warning was why she was here, after all. Why she even teamed up with him. She hadn’t wanted to, but something about his warning was so reminiscent of the foreboding she had felt since leaving the Order, since leaving Anakin, that she could not ignore it. She had to check. She had to make sure her master was okay. And judging by what she had seen so far, he was not. “He—he told me some things that concerned me.” She admitted, keeping her gaze away from his. “I had to come back. I had to check...to see…” She looked back at Anakin then, her eyes searching his. “Master, are you alright?”

“I’m fine.” Spoken too quickly. He was not fine. She could sense it. She could feel his inner turmoil, even as his mind shielded his thoughts. “What did Maul tell you that worried you?”

“He told me he was having visions. He wants to stop them from happening.” Ahsoka turned away again, looking straight ahead. They continued walking. Before long, they stopped at a building. It was an apartment building. It was familiar. Anakin entered and she followed. He pressed the call button for a turbolift, and the pair stood silently, waiting. She wanted to ask where they were, but something stopped her. He was back in his own mind again. She reached through the Force, brushing against his mind. He was shielding, but she still sensed his emotions: worry, fear, desperation. What was he afraid of? They stepped into the lift and rode it to the top floor. When they stepped out, Ahsoka realized where they were.

Anakin typed in a code to unlock the apartment and entered, seemingly in a daze. She was sure that if he were thinking straight, he wouldn’t have led her here. This was Padmé’s apartment. Ahsoka knew then that this turmoil she could feel in him was related to her. Though how, she did not yet know. She still said nothing. She almost didn’t want to call his attention back to her. But at the same time, she felt like a fly on the wall. Simply an observer, seeing a part of her Master that he had always tried to hide, but she had seen early on, nonetheless.

“What did he see?” Anakin’s voice broke her from her quiet observation. She blinked. “Maul. What did he see?”

“He saw…” she trailed off. She didn’t want to tell him. How could she tell him? Oh, Maul saw you fall to the Dark Side, Master. Is that a possibility? Hardly. “Master, what is going on? You seem…” She looked away again, not wanting to see his face. “Troubled.” She finished lamely. Troubled hardly began to describe the utter turmoil she sensed in his head.

“I’m fi—”

“Don’t lie,” she sighed. “I can sense the conflict within you. You are not fine, Master.” Anakin opened his mouth, most likely to object, when the sound of a door opening stopped them both in their tracks. Ahsoka moved away while Anakin remained frozen. Footsteps sounded in the hall and before long, Padmé appeared. A smile spread across her face when she saw Anakin and Ahsoka watched as she came to stand before him. He looked down at her and Ahsoka felt his love and protectiveness seeping into the Force.

“Anakin,” Padmé beamed up at him, “I didn’t expect you to be here. I’m glad you are.” To Ahsoka’s surprise, she winced. But as quickly as the look of pain crossed her features, it disappeared, being replaced with happiness. “And I’m not the only one, it seems.” She took Anakin’s hand in hers and pressed it against her abdomen. Ahsoka’s jaw dropped open in shock.

Padmé was pregnant? When? How? Ahsoka felt Anakin’s response through the Force: love, happiness, protectiveness. Then darker emotions replaced the first: possessiveness, worry and bone-deep fear. Padmé seemed to sense it too. She cradled Anakin’s face tenderly, tilting it down so she could look into his eyes.

“Ani,” she whispered, her thumb stroking his cheek, “you are not still worried about your dreams, are you?” Anakin closed his eyes, and Ahsoka felt his fear intensify.

“I won’t let this one become real,” he murmured. “ You know what happened with my mother. I cannot—I will not— let that happen to you.”

From that simple sentence alone, Ahsoka realized Maul was right. Anakin was going down a dark path. He would fall to Sidious in a matter of days. And Ahsoka now knew how. He was afraid. He worried Padmé would die. In childbirth, probably, and he was going to do whatever it took to make sure that did not happen. She could sense the resignation in his soul. He was going to damn himself to the Dark, if that was what it took to save her. Ahsoka shook her head slowly, though the tiniest of a grim smile spread across her face. Well, he wasn’t going to Fall. Not if she had anything to say about it. She stepped forward.

“Well, this is a fine mess you've gotten yourselves into.”