#we chinese however. we absolutely fucking do not

[cometchasr]

hi. singaporean chinese guy. it's a problem here too, mostly tied in with our mother tongue problem (tldr every student fucking sucks at chinese/malay/tamil/etc. now) and how everything is dying as english becomes more prominent. even singlish, whose peak ended in 2007 when PCK was discontinued, really. we really do not know our own heritage from where we came from, or even from singapore. hawker centres are dying, no one knows their own culture anymore, all we know is whatever we see on social media, which is overwhelmingly english american media. no one young here listens to local artists, watches local shows, knows anything other than whatever popular english song is on right now. hell, there's a reason jj lin's entire youtube channel is in traditional chinese despite him being singaporean.

we all speak english by default nowadays, because PAP said so. we were always more susceptible to it, and now it's reached the point where i do genuinely believe that we are going to run out of chinese teachers and will have to start bringing them in from china and taiwan within my lifetime, same for the other mother tongues.

yeh, it sucks

DO NOT LET SOCIAL MEDIA TURN YOU INTO AN AMERICAN

[gyuvision]

goodnight ricky

wc ; 1k - pairing ; ricky shen x fem reader

summary ; before your roommate left she promised she’d find you a replacement. 3 years later she never did, until now, leaving you as confused as ever while you looked at the 6ft male sitting in your room.

contains -> fluff/slight angst

you came back late, having class at a top (and painfully competitive) med school plus the late shift at the local coffee shop. you were tired especially during exams. all you wanted was to stay in your bed and read a book, or sleep for the rest of the night. however you pleased.

so naturally being that exhausted you were absolutely not expecting the man sitting in your desk, drawing towards the conclusion that you were hallucinating and that maybe sleep sounded like a better idea than a book.

“someone told me to wait for you here”

“what?”

“you know, your roommate?”

oh. right.

your roommate was your best friend. you were inseparable, shared the same dreams, got into the same college together.

but everything changed. she got a boyfriend, and suddenly your future wasn’t as intertwined as you originally planned it to be.

they broke up and she realized she wasn’t sure what she wanted. everything about her had changed and your schedule almost never lined up because of how many times she changed it for her ex.

so, she cut ties, peacefully. she explained she no longer wanted the same thing as you and left but promised to visit soon and that she’d find someone to take her place because she knew how much you hated being on your own.

guess that explained why the man (who you later knew as shen quanrui) was waiting for you, in the same spot she always waited for you to come home.

“its been.. 2 years since she left. how could you have found me when she couldn’t even shoot a text?”

“unbeknownst you, you mean a great deal to her more than you seem to think you do. i was her partner in art school before we had graduated, and she sent me here. she knows how you are, with your life plan laid out in front of you, for you. she knows you’d still live here even after almost 3 years. she knows you’d end up getting into med school after college. you’re not that unpredictable jung y/n.”

“so i’ve been prepared all my life, and what about it? i don’t march towards things without a plan. and how could you address me by my full name when i don’t even know yours?”

“shen quanrui.”

“shim what?” “shen. quan. rui. shen quanrui. its not that hard.”

“so you’re not korean?” “obviously not. i’m chinese.”

“can you say your name one more time?”

“my god. you can just call me ricky.”

“lovelicky.” “what?” “nothing.”

“i brought back food. it was supposed to be a snack for me but i guess you can have it now that i know i’ll be accommodating for two from this point on.”

“thanks. but uh- can we just go to sleep?” ricky asked, moving from your desk to sit on your twin bed.

“what? this is a two person flat. go sleep in her old room.”

“uh- i would, assuming she left behind her bed. but you kind of boarded up her room and i’m not looking to take it down at midnight on a thursday.”

“oh. i guess you’re right. i forgot about that. i just never assumed she’d actually send someone to me so i didn’t want to look at everything she left behind.”

ricky shrugged and laid down on one side of your bed, while he let you climb into the side touching the wall. since when was he wearing pajamas?..

“isnt this weird?” you muttered.

“not really.”

“i just met you.”

“your couch looks stiff as fuck and i’m not sleeping on the floor.”

right. you had a couch.. maybe med school is taking a toll on your memory. you feel like your frontal lobe is deteriorating.

ricky watched as you reached for a book, before he quickly grabbed your hand and set it back down on the shelf above the bed.

“no. sleep. you have school then the night shift at the cafe.”

“how did you-” “you leave your schedule framed on your fridge.” “right..”

“goodnight y/n.”

“okay. goodnight ricky.”

[silassinclair]

Michael's Girl PT. 3 \\ PolyLostBoys + Michael x Reader

Summary: You're put to the test by David to see if you are truly worthy of being a vampire. And you witness a horror you could never imagine. CW: Blood, Gore, Vampires being Vampires

Previous Part <- 🖤 -> Next Part

Tonight was a night of celebration. Music blasted from Paul's boombox, Dwayne was doing skate tricks around the fountain, and Marko had returned with some food.

"Chinese again? Seriously? You better not be do what I think you're gonna do David." Michael said and looked over at the leader with an annoyed look.

David only shrugged. "What Michael? Worried your little girlfriend really isn't up for it?"

Michael glared at the blonde. Meanwhile you looked back and forth at the two in confusion. What exactly did David do to Michael? Your boyfriend didn't go into specifics with his whole vampire transformation process but you assumed it wasn't fun.

"She'll take whatever you throw at her, trust me. She's tougher than she looks. Brave too." Michael smiled pridefully and kissed your head.

David looks you in the eyes as he ushers for Marko to come forward with the food. "I can tell Michael. After all she did walk into a vampires den knowing full well the dangers of it all. She'll fit into our pack perfectly if she can pass my tests."

Marko handed everyone a white box carton of rice and noodles. While Michael ate his noodles with a fork you used chopsticks like David.

"So Y/n, how do those worms taste huh?"

The girl looked down at her open box of noodles, or rather, wiggling earth worms. She felt like she wanted to gag, she just ate one! But it didn't taste like worms, it still tasted like noodles. This had to be some kind of trick, most likely why Michael looked bothered when Marko brought back Chinese food.

You look up at David with a smirk of your own. "They taste divine David."

Vampires were still a mystery to you. But you assumed that some vampires had special abilities. Meaning that this was most likely an illusion created by David to scare you. However it didn't work, you saw right through it.

Taking another bite of the "worms" Paul and Dwayne started laughing.

"Damn! Tough chick dude. She didn't even gag. Unlike our buddy Mikey here, remember the first time David fucked with your head and made you think you were eating maggots? You coughed that shit up so quick!" Paul said while pointing his fork at Michael. Michael only rolled his eyes.

"Shut up. I didn't know alright?"

David smiles as he continues to eat his food. “You got guts girlie. You passed my first test. It’ll only get more difficult from here on…”

.

.

.

This week has been absolute INSANITY for me. First David makes me hang off the bottom of a bridge while a train comes by and I FALL but luckily he catches me, and second… Well second is about to happen soon I think.

I’m holding onto Michael while he follows along with the rest of the boys on their bikes. No one told me where we were going but only that this was one of the final tests. And I was nervous. Eventually we reach a clearing in the woods ways outside of the boardwalk. A giant bonfire is lit and surf nazi punks are dancing around the giant flames as a boombox plays music.

The boys and Michael get off their bikes and climb up a tree to scout out the surf nazis.

Less fluidly and easily as them I also climb up the tree. Dwayne sees me struggle and takes my hand to help pull me up the rest of the way.

“Thanks..” I mutter. He only nods.

I feel Michael's hands grab my hips and he helps move me so I sit next to him on a large branch. The other boys stand menacingly, their eyes glow in as they look at the flames of the bonfire the surf nazis dance around.

"What are we doing here?" I ask. Michael gives me a sympathetic look and I know that something bad is about to happen.

"This is your second to final test." David says with his signature sly smirk. "Let's see if you can handle what you're about to witness."

"After all-" Paul cuts in, "This is gonna be your everyday life. So don't get queasy on us okay dolly?"

I nod nervously. The tension grows tight around me. The five boy's auras have changed, I can feel it. Something is different. I look up worriedly at Michael only to gasp slightly when I see his vampiric face again. I look around at the others, all of their features sharp, eyes yellow, and teeth pointed.

They were gonna eat these people.

Right in front of me.

"Let's go boys!" David hollers and in the blink of an eye all five of them swoop down and pounce on their victims. Blood flies, flesh rips, heads roll. The scene was absolutely vile. The boys ate like animals, they didn't hesitate to rip limbs and let the blood fly. Michael however ate more neatly, for my sake most likely. Frozen I was, perched up on the branch where I sat.

My mind felt blank. Watching people of my own species get torn apart by pure predators. Human kind was the top of the food chain, but tonight proved to me otherwise.

When every nazi was dead all the boys but Michael cheered. Blood covered their clothes and gore and bones scattered about. My heart was racing and I knew they could hear it. It thumped like a battle drum, and I was ready to surrender that battle and run away. My legs had a mind of their own and screamed at me to run. Run away from the danger.

But my mind knew better. If I ran now then I would fail. And if I fail then I fail Michael and our relationship. I can't back down now, not after all I went through.

I hop down from the tree and approach Michael. My legs shake for every step I take closer to where the massacre occurred. I feel the crunch of bone snap under my shoe and I flinch.

"Y/n are you okay?" Michael asks worriedly. His face was morphed back to his human one, but blood was still smeared across his lips and the hands that held me.

My mind felt like it was floating away, but Michael caught it and brought it back to me with a kiss to my cheek. Snapping out of it I shakily reply, "I-I'm fine... After all this is what I'm gonna see for the rest of eternity right? So I better get used to it." I laugh light heartily.

"The sound of your heartbeat says otherwise." David says. He stands behind me with his three brothers beside him. Their hair is disheveled and even more blood coats their clothing and skin.

Michael gently holds me to him, his arms around me protectively hugging me to his waist. "She passed the test David, she didn't scream or run off. And it's only natural for her to be afraid, so give it a damn break."

"Oooo" Marko giggles, "Mikey's defending his girl. We've never seen you so ticked off before."

Paul and Dwayne laugh too but are silenced by David. "He's right. She passed, but let's see if she'll change her mind after seeing what she saw tonight."

.

.

.

You couldn't sleep. Even with Michael holding you protectively under the covers you still couldn't sleep. How could you? Every time you closed your eyes you heard the screams of men and saw their parts ooze and fly. Flashes of the boys and their vampiric faces, their teeth sinking into the flesh of human beings.

"Baby..." Michael said tiredly. His rough hands rubbed up and down your bare arm. "Your heartbeat is loud... What's wrong?" Michael says as he rubs the sleep form his eyes.

"What do you mean 'what is it?'" You say with a firm frown. "I saw people die tonight Michael. I know I shouldn't be fazed by it but I am! I'm scared!"

Your boyfriend leans up and tries to look at your face, but you're turned away.

"Please look at me baby. Don't turn your back to me now. Especially not now."

You turn around to face him and he softens. You've been crying. Red swollen eyes and puffy cheeks.

"Don't tell yourself that you have to not feel fazed. Because it's your human instinct telling you something is wrong, and that's okay. Let yourself be scared, let yourself cry, I'll be here for you the whole way through okay?"

Letting out a shaken breath you let yourself crumble against Michael's bear chest. Broken hiccups and sobs escape your lips and Michael combs his fingers through your hair.

"Shhh shhh shhh, it's okay baby. You're gonna be okay. I know you're scared, I understand because I've been there too. But it won't be so bad, I won't leave your side okay?"

You nod against Michael's chest, not wanting to be even a millimeter apart from him.

"I know I can do this Michael... But I don't have it in me to take someone's life."

Michael thinks for a moment. Until he calms your nerves by gently petting your head. "I think I have a temporary solution." Michael says.

"Like what?"

"Well, what if for the first weeks that you're a vampire, I'll make the kills for you? All you have to do is eat what I kill. You can do that right?"

"Uhm." You think for a moment. Eating people was okay to you if you were a vampire, that part didn’t gross you out like you expected it would. Just the killing factor frightened you.

“That’ll work.” You respond with a hesitant smile. “But will David be okay with that?”

Michael rolls his eyes. “Screw David. If my girl wants to take it slow and easy for her first weeks of being a vampire then she can. David can go crawl in his cave and pout all he wants for all I care.” His hands caress your face, fingertips gliding along all his favorite features.

You place a kiss to his fingers when they glide across your lips. “Thank you Michael. What would I do without you?”

He only smiles and brings your face forward for a warm kiss.

You woke up not to the sun, but instead sunset. Michael also rose and stretched with a yawn.

“Hey baby, sunrise and shine.” He says with a corny grin.

Instead of getting up like your boyfriend you hide under his bedsheets. “I’m never gonna get used to your vampire schedule.”

He laughs lightly and kisses your hair that peeks from the top of your sheets. “That’s what I thought at first, but soon enough you’ll adjust just fine. Now come on baby, we gotta go to the cave and meet the guys to see if you’re ready to drink from the bottle.”

You assumed the bottle he was talking about was the bottle of blood he was tricked into drinking.

"So it really is blood huh?" You say and poke your head out through the bundle of blankets you took sanctuary under.

Giving you a sad smile Michael embraces you through the bundle of blankets you're under, making you get warm fast.

"Mhm. Yeah it's true sweetheart. But it isn't so bad. Maybe you can take a hit off of Paul's blunt to make it not as bad? That's what I did at least." Michael grins cockily as he rocks you back and forth.

"Michaeeelll" You whine, "I'm still nervous."

In one sudden motion he rips the blankets off of you making you scream and curl in on yourself to keep whatever warmth you still have inside. Suddenly your boyfriend huffs and picks you up with his strength.

"Michael stop it! Put me down you big stud!" Though you're smacking him to put you down your laughter counters your physical attacks on him.

"No can do baby, gotta shake the nerves outta you."

Michael then holds you like a bride and rocks you back and forth like a baby, making you blush embarrassingly bright.

"Okay okay stop rocking me! I'm not a baby you buffoon!" You start to flail around more in his arms making him grunt and plop you down onto the bed.

Michael gives you his million dollar smile and quietly asks, "You feeling better now?"

Sitting on your knees you sit up and press a soft kiss to Michael's chin. "Yeah, you're little therapy worked surprisingly. I'm surprised I didn't get motion sick!"

Michael rolls his eyes and grabs your hands to help you off the bed in one swift swoop.

"Well what are we waiting for? Let's get you turned babe."

(sorry this was short yall. Kinda rushed and I wanted to get David's silly shenanigans out of the way. Not proof read btw.)

[wompwompwrote]

Conflicted

Sooooo this is my first time writing fan fiction so I'm sorry if it's awful!!!!

Warnings: None <3

WC: 616 (Teeny Tiny.)

I'll probs write a part two!

----------------

Megumi does not like you. 

You’re absolutely aggravating. The way you speak, your mannerisms, even the way you breathe– just gets under his skin. Honestly, he doesn’t understand how you’re so beloved to everyone! You're apparently everyone’s best friend, yet how can they not see how irritating you are?

What’s even more troublesome, is that you’re constantly on his mind. Only because he hates you, not any other reason of course! When he reveals this to Yuuji, the response he gets is far from the one he expected. 

———— 

“Honestly dude, it sounds like you have a crush.” Yuuji shrugs, not giving much thought to Megumi’s predicament.

This leaves Megumi reeling. A crush? On her? Absolutely not. 

“No. There’s no way dumbass. You guys just don’t notice how fucking irritating she is because she’s got you all wrapped around her stupid little finger.”

Yuuji looks up from his phone, staring Megumi down. 

“Listen dude, literally no one here has ever had an issue with her. This really does sound like a you problem. All of the things you listed that are “wrong” about her just sounds like you’re looking for reasons to hate her.” Yuuji sighs, hoping that he can knock some sense into Megumi’s thick skull. 

“I agree with Yuuji!”

Megumi’s head whips around, only to spot Nobara standing in the doorway, hands full with plastic bags containing chinese take out.

“How much did you hear?” He cringes, awaiting her answer. 

“Just about everything! You’ve got some serious issues, Megs. Y/N’s the lovelist, prettiest, and coolest gal ever.” Nobara lets out a huff as she sets the bags down. Yuuji greedily snatches one of the bags, dodging Nobara’s trying to swat him away. 

“Oh! I have a perfect idea! Why don’t we invite Y/N over to eat with us?” Nobara squeals, and Megumi believes the universe may actually be against him. 

“If you invite her, I’ll leave.”

“Oh, shush Megumi!” She throws her hands up, annoyed with her friend’s behavior. 

Cheeks flaring red, Megumi slinks out of Yuuji's room. He was on a mission to forget his conversation with Yuuji even happened. Unfortunately, as he sulks off to his own room, he runs into his most hated foe– Y/N. 

“Oh hi, ‘Gumi! I haven’t seen you around recently! How are you?” Y/N asks while a bright smile on her face, eyes shining, teeth gleaming. Looking at her made Megumi’s throat constrict, for reasons of annoyance, certainly. 

“I’m well.” He chokes out. He swiftly moves around her, attempting to go to his own room. However, before he could go any farther, a hand clamped down on his wrist prevented him from doing so. 

“So– I have a question. Could we train together some time? I-it’s just that I think you’d be a great sparring partner and we haven’t actually sparred together before so I just think it would be…productive? Also, I’ve sparred with literally everyone here before except you and I don’t want you to think I’m avoiding you and oh my gosh I’m so sorry I’m rambling!” To save herself from embarrassment, Y/N hides her face and burning cheeks in her hands. 

Her rant leaves Megumi speechless. He didn’t know what to say, but he supposed he should say yes, but only because it would be productive to spar with her. 

“Fine.”

Y/N claps and smiles widely. “Yay! How does 10 AM tomorrow sound? Perfect? Perfect! It’s a date!” After establishing what time they’d be meeting, Y/N bounces away to Nobara’s room. 

“Um- Nobara isn’t in her room, she’s in Yuuji’s.”

“Oh, Thanks! See ya tomorrow, ‘Gumi!”  

 Megumi is left feeling conflicted, and weirdly nervous for the day ahead.

[unforth]

MXTX Fandom Content Thief: @/coldxperience

I've spotted someone wholesale copying the compiled list of Lan Clan rules I put together a few years ago. My list is here:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/25470928

Their list is here:

How do I know it's stolen? It's insanely easy to tell, actually. See, this is in my original a/n on ao3:

[ID screen capture of text that reads: These rules are presumably numbered, as when Lan Wangji is being beaten, Lan Qiren asks him “what is the 52nd doctrine of the Lan clan?” However, they are given in a different order in different sources so establishing how they are numbered is impossible. Since we can’t know the order they “belong” in, I’ve organized them by grouping them thematically. For the few I know numbers for, those numbers are included in parenthesis. End ID]

The rules have no official order or categories. I made up this order and these categories myself. And yet in coldxperience's post...

[ID: two side by side screen captures, one from coldxperience's blog, one from AO3, showing rules in a category labeled "appropriate behavior" and two matching lists of rules in the exact same order. End ID]

[ID two side by side screen captures showing rules in categories about respecting authority and cultivation. Again the categories are the same and the rules lists are identical and in the same order. End ID]

Look, there IS no canon categories or canon order. I made them up to organize them. It's absolutely impossible that someone else compiling a list would land on the exact same categories and the exact same order.

Coldxperience's list is plagiarized from my list. Which tbh I wouldn't have even minded all that much except they're claiming its their own work. My list was barely even MY own work, I used other people's translations (and I credited them). So like. Coldxperience didn't credit me, didn't credit the actual translators, and has the gall to apologize that there might be mistakes cause English and Chinese aren't their first languages.

There might be mistakes. On your stolen list. Gee, ya think?

Anyway, this person has been posting other meta they supposedly wrote about character name translations and such. If they stole wholesale from me they certainly stole from others.

I highly recommend yall block them.

(DO NOT HARASS THEM. DO NOT HARASS OTHER PEOPLE ITS NOT FUCKING WORTH IT JUST SPREAD THE WORD BLOCK AND MOVE ON).

[starrycassi]

I think a lot of young queers folks (like me. Not trying to be all elderly about this I'm literally a gen z) today need to watch the good oldies about our community.

⚠️: I don't mean, in any way shape or form to insult the newer queer shows/movies. I love SPOP. I love TOH. I read and loved Heart stopper. However, because of the restraint of mainstream media, they have a very... palatable?? way to portray the community. I am NOT blaming the creators (who I'm sure would love to go a bit further down on their portrayals if given the option)

SO! I have nice recommendations that I, personally, enjoy a lot. They're in no particular order.

A classic, for starters. But I'm a cheerleader!: Very campy, barbie-y, funny and free on YouTube. A cheerleader is sent to a conversation camp when her social circle realizes that she might be into girls. (It has a very unrealistic portrayal of conversation camps, though. Very cartoony) my comfort movie fr fr

Priscilla, queen of the desert: A trio of drag queens travel across the desert on a big, old bus. They fight, there's some falling in love. They talk a lot about gender identity, queer childhoods and similar topics. I've only been able to find this one (and most of the ones on this list, since I don't have any streaming devices) on illegal websites. There's very, very direct homophobia, SA, physical abuse, child neglect, yk, the American dream. The queens are the funnier thing ever, the romance plotlines are absolutely delightful and well-rounded. Focuses a bit more on the community itself and interpersonal relationships. All around, a solid 10/10.

Kinky boots: A very prude, engaged man inherits a shoe fabric. He's running out of ideas to stay in business, until he meets a drag queen. Same warnings (and themes!) as the last one. This one has a stronger focus on how the characters become more accepting and how our queen navigates being faced with them. I've rewatched it like a hundred times.

The birdcage (2000's) or le cauge aux folles (1970'): A gay couple runs a drag club. Their son brings home a conservative girlfriend and her family. This is more comedy lenient, but funny as fuck nonetheless.

Paris is burning: this one is a documentary, btw. Focuses on the life of drag queens in the 80's. Nothing I didn't already say on Priscilla tbh.

Saving face: A chinese-american girl that lives in a VERY conservatory and secluded community is trying (and failing) not to fall in love with a ballerina. At the same time, her mother (a widow, how scandalous!) gets mysteriously pregnant and gets kicked out of their family home. This one will hit close to home if you're from any ethnic, homophobic household. Cried a lot. Then cried some more. Happy ending, though!

D.E.B.S: THIS IS THE FUNNIEST, CUTEST MOVIE EVER. It's a full on romance comedy for when the mind is a bit too tired! The main plot is that, in a school of girls being trained to be top-notch spies (very totally spies type) a girl who's the top of her class falls in love with the biggest villainess they ever faced. More of a coming of age thing, that also explores the good old dilemma of choosing what the hell you're supposed to do with your life once you turn 18 (relatable tbh)

And now, for a book (in Spanish, though) we have "Las Malas": Narrated by a trans, poor prostitute. Extremely realistic in its narrative voice, cruel and very hurtful sometimes. This is actually one of my favorite books ever, it's so fucking underrated that I'm going to die if no one reads it. There's EVERYTHING. It genuinely drives me crazy to read this. We have queer moms, a child found in a freezing park, suicides, literally anything happens. I love it.

If anyone has any suggestions PLEASE drop them. I'm begging u

[olderthannetfic]

I know with social media the way it is, and how horrible the us political climate is, that this sort of response to Audrey as an OTW candidate was probably just a ticking time bomb. But damn, I went to her actual Twitter, and honestly? She seems like one of those old-style, fiscal conservative Republicans who may want to change things from within the party, however unlikely that may be. She literally pointed out how small govt means less govt messing with our rights, and how the current Republican national party is hypocritical about that.

So many of her typical tweetings (?) are pretty socially progressive. If she's in deep south Missouri, it may be that she had to run Republican for any chance of changing things for the better in her local area.

I do not support Republicans as a whole. I think they ARE dragging the country to a horrific, fundamentalist grave. But she is an individual, and from what I can tell, supportive of lgbtq rights and freedom of speech on the internet. I likely would not have voted for her anyway, but nothing she has done or said so far has earned her the hate and vitriol she has received over such a short period.

Tiffany was ALSO not a CCP spy working for the Chinese govt. She was literally not even in confirmed to BE in China for fucks sake. Chinese people have been leaving the country in droves! Was she a good fit for the board? Hell no! But she wasn't voted in, was she?

I'm just so exhausted of people assuming the absolute worst and going on a hate campaign based off their own misinformed assumptions. This is not helping anyone see the "left" or "proshippers" or whatever our "side" is, as reasonable, helpful people.

I'm exhausted of defending people whose positions I don't even agree with, because the people I do "agree" with are acting so abhorrently.

What are your thoughts on this?

--

Yeah, that's my read on her in the context of local US politics. Running as an independent and then a Republican where she is is typical of people with her type of platform. It doesn't make her Fundie Satan.

Like Tiffany, there are plenty of different reasons not to vote for her, so we don't need to worry so much about the minutia of her political stances. Only if she were a great candidate but with a couple of red flags would we need to dig into this.

Like I said last year, working for OTW means having people assume the worst constantly and come for you with pitchforks. There are reasons it's not attractive above and beyond internal mismanagement. It's hard to get enough people to run for Board to even have a contested election. We usually do these days, but in the past, we often didn't. It was just people taking turns to jump on the grenade.

This kind of response to someone agreeing to the worst job in OTW just reaffirms that it's not worth it and discourages future candidates.

I think everyone should chillax and vote in somebody else.

ETA: and while this has been sitting in the queue, it has become a moot point anyway.

[modtheartifex]

i wrote this into a youtube comment like moments ago, but i feel strongly enough that i will put it out here as well;

Lego Monkie Kid Season 5 does NOT have villains. it has characters that are antagonistic forces and layered with nuance on top of nuance.

not to say previous seasons didnt do this, but this season ABSOLUTELY is entirely filled with characters like this

lmk season 5 spoilers, as well as anything from previous seasons just in case cause idk. might get long too tbh oopsies JINNGFDOIJN

we have a few characters to consider for LMK s5's "villains".

we have Ne Zha's dad (i forget his name, ill probably call him pagoda man), nine headed dragon (consort, 10th king, xiangliu) and nuwa. we could theoretically consider thousand eyed demon, however hes only relevant in one episode so id hardly count that

pagoda man is the easiest to explain, he is an antagonistic force because hes trying to hold onto what little order there is left of the world, he is trying to be the duct tape keeping the sawed in half boat together, and hes trying to minimize risks. does that excuse how he treats ne zha? fuck no, but thats a whole different discussion and depending on your interpretation of how much of the chinese mythos you use for this work will vary. he is just like mk as mk himself points out, it doesnt have to be just pagoda man doing the work, theres people willing to help, and then he joins the heroes side for the end.

cool, great, now. what the fuck do i mean by nuwa?

this is where interpretation is strongest, where it is key. ill just be sharing my perspective. when i was first watching season 5 my partner pointed out to me that in chinese mythos chaos is a core element of the world, it is necessary. this, coupled with the fact that nuwa made mk to fix a cycle she created (which we also dont know how many cycles the world has gone through, it could be one, it could be two, it could be in the hundreds if not thousands, whos to say.) and to keep chaos out... she is keeping the world from being complete. her little cave without the outside world, without proper balance, her little people living blissfully apocalypse to apocalypse. "but theyll all die!" "theyll live again" nuwa says, smile on her face.

she is disconnected from her cave, her world her people, her creations, who knows how long shes been in the limbo, how well she can perceive time, how many times a sacrifice comes in, they get a few words exchanged before they just leave, her in the pillar, only getting glimpses when the cycle is ending of the world, only to be shut in again.

neat, ok, but xiangliu??? hes who was gestured at from the BEGINNING of season 4.

see. heres where we get into the GOOD shit.

this is why it is important to establish that we dont know how many cycles have happened. we do not know how long he has been stuck, how many times he has tried to fix the world over and over. he makes it clear in his ending dialogue, if only he knew how to fix it, that sharing the power of the stones was the key to his freedom. the fact that he goes from what most would consider the least important title to the most important one, his own name, the fact he states he was wukongs friend, his enemy, both, wukong just doesnt remember

that implies longentivity. that implies so many cycles and lifetimes lived inside this cycle, being aware of everything, being so damnably aware of what one considers true freedom, and having to sit at the precipice of that.

it is agony.

xiangliu for the majority of the season is the only one to call mk by his name. mk gets so often called child, kid, nicknames by the others, maybe mei refers to him as mk, but xiangliu has it be DELIBERATE. he altered the course of the cycle to give mk a life, to let him HAVE a life where nuwa didnt care for one, he WANTED mk to grow enough that he would be able to choose. because everything is about mks choice, his ability to choose it all matters on HIS. CHOICE.

the only time this falters is when xiangliu thinks he is trapped for good. he rushes at mk, one final chance at freedom seemingly taken from him. xiangliu never fights mk. he only fights the others when they start fighting him. when its just him and mk at the edge of the world, at the edge of chaos, he talks to mk. tells him what to expect, mentions a mysterious "he" now that mk has opened the cage. and he pushes mk back so he gets to go back to his life. so that mk can have choices still. xiangliu got what he wanted, so its only right mk gets what he wanted too. to live with his friends and let everyone live a life where they can figure something out.

that is why i do not think there are villains in lego monkie kid season 5. they are antagonists with layers of nuance, nuance we arent privy to for reason or another, be it episode count, length, screentime, or that were just not supposed to yet. season 5 does not have an obvious bad guy, a villain, because the nuance is right within our grasp.

thank you for reading this. fucking essay apparently oopsies JINNGFDIJN

[caliburn-the-sword]

a (non)comprehensive list of all characters that i as a child decided were asian because representation hardly existed in the early 2010's, with varying degrees of asian-coding and/or canon. it also gets more unhinged

will not be tagging SHIT because i would like to not experience hate but also i feel like my mutuals would somewhat enjoy this. as a kid, my only requirements were that they either 1) had dark hair 2) had dark eyes or 3) had unnatural hair/eye/skin colour in which case i could go nuts

list is under the cut:

you liked these fairies cause you were gay?? i liked them because they were asian to me we are NOT the same (i am also gay). both are asian coded so i wasn't wrong. also shoutout to vidia for being asian and an absolute BITCH. i think her back is sore from carrying the bitchy asian rep. no one's doing it like her

musa from winx. also asian coded so it works

batman. NOT to be confused with bruce wayne. bruce wayne is white af even to me as a child. but when he had the mask on i could project on him and call him chinese

dick grayson's robin in almost all cartoon iterations (pictured above in the batman) but also including:

to be clear, this is NOT to be confused with dick grayson the civilian, or dick grayson as nightwing. by my 9 y/o logic those guys were both white af. but when dick grayson had the robin mask on that gave room for me to project, as such they're asian

zatanna zatara is wasian IN MY HEART. to ME her mum is chinese and obvi her dad is italian so she's almost just like me (chinese/spanish). idc argue with the wall

superman but ONLY the justice league unlimited version

huntress bertinelli, for the same reasons as zatanna, was always wasian to me. but she gave off half korean, half italian vibes. i will not explain myself

now is raven from a different plane than us?? yes. however azarath is home to asians idek

sorry guys jinx is a bad bitch so she's also asian

while we're at it, beast boy is also asian but ONLY in teen titans. unfortunately young justice beast boy is whitewashed (he was never asian to begin with). i asked my sister if she ever asian-washed characters when watching tv she said no (rudeass) but i provided multiple teen titans as an example and my mum was like "wait?? beast boy isn't asian?? i thought he was asian??" so beast boy is actually mum-approved-asian. i don't make the rules

draculaura from monster high was always asian to me idc what the haters say. everyone say thank you to the monster high reboot for giving me asian draculaura because frankly i deserve it

also. robecca steam is south asian in my heart

jackson jekyll was also asian. idk. he just was

now, since the eah reboot made draculaura wasian i'm BEGGING for there to be an eah reboot because they will do my girl raven queen justice. SHE is asian

kitty cheshire is also asian i don't make the rules

sorry guys duchess swan is also asian

while i'm at it, faybelle thorn is also asian talk to the wall

now i need you guys to pinky promise to be nice to me. percy jackson was wasian to me until ethan nakamura was introduced. only after ethan's introduction did my 13 y/o ass let percy be white again

tony stark is asian but ONLY in iron man armoured adventures

now, a plethora of xmen evolution characters are actually asian (source: i made it the fuck up) these include, but are not limited to: wolverine, x23, wanda and pietro

[porcupine-girl]

Did you enjoy Yibo's NYE performances?

Sure, we were all psyched for him to perform Observer, but did you like the surprise duet he did earlier in the show?

If so, I am here to tell you about the guy he was singing with - because Yibo loves him, and so should you!

That! Is Da Zhangwei!

He wrote that song! He was one of Yibo's cohosts on Tiantian Xiang Shang (also known by the terrible translation Day Day Up), and you know Yibo's TTXS cohosts were his family. His big brothers. It's how he got his reputation as a ge collector.

This is DZW's other NYE performance, which is a bit more representative of his usual aesthetic:

If you like either of those songs/performances, read on to learn more about why you should definitely be paying attention to this guy.

(Sorry most of these videos don't have English subs. But most are music so at least you can find the lyrics online.)

First off, DZW didn't just write this song and then perform it with Yibo (and give Han-ge a shoutout afterward). He then posted this video, basically shouting "I wrote this song because I miss my TTXS bros!" (The lyric being repeated here is "I will miss you")

I mean, I don't know for a fact that he wrote it about them. But I do know that he literally DID write a song about Yibo once. This is a thing he has done before. It's called Cool Guy:

But the fact that he and Yibo are on each other's lists of favorite people is only the beginning, and definitely not why I became obsessed with him.

Da Zhangwei fun facts:

You'll find him on English-language sites like Spotify and iTunes under his English stage name, Wowkie Da. People also often refer to him as DLS or Da-Laoshi, showing how respected he is in the music industry.

He started a band (花兒樂隊, The Flowers), wrote all the music for said band, and had his first hit, 静止 (Static), in 1999 - when he was 16 years old. Like all his music, it's catchy as fuck. (To go back to Yibo for just a second, I'm guessing they bonded over having to deal with fame from a really young age.)

(Yes, the guy sticking his tongue out at the camera up there is 40 years old.)

Da Zhangwei is actually a stage name, too. His real name is Zhang Wei (so you'll occasionally find him as Wowkie Zhang), but that's such a common name that when he started his career he started going by "Big Zhangwei" - which is hilarious given that he was a scrawny teenager.

He continued to write pretty much all the band's music for the next decade. (Here's a whole concert from probably 2007ish). Then when they broke up in 2009 he started his solo career, also writing all his own music.

静止 was an angsty teenage anthem, but since then his aesthetic, both songwriting-wise and visually, has tended toward upbeat and cute.

I think it's safe to say he's leaned into this even more since going solo. Some of his recent hits: 撒花/Scatter Flowers, 一个Nice, 满怀可爱所向披靡 / Full of Cuteness and Invincible, and 万物盛开法则 / Law of All Things Blooming, from above.

However, don't be fooled! This just means that when he writes something sad, it's absolutely heartbreaking. Examples include 永远唱不完的歌/The Song That Doesn't End (above) and 我的深情就是个笑话/My Affection Is Just A Joke.

In addition to hosting TTXS, he has become a staple on all sorts of variety shows, both for music and comedy.

I found him via Season 3 of Our Song, where some of his accomplishments included creating a mashup of 12 different songs, from traditional Chinese folk music and opera to his own 撒花, and turning "your team will do 3 songs" into an entire 3-act musical (link is to the whole episode, since the 3 songs are alternating with the other team, but the other team is AMAZING with people you should get to know too). ETA I forgot about this compilation I did of clips from some of his Our Song performances!

He got to meet the Rolling Stones earlier this year! There's a translator but he's so excited he keeps breaking in while she's trying to ask his questions. His English is really good (if heavily accented), and he has a tendency to throw it in completely unnecessarily to both his performances and random conversation.

He's been on this show for a few seasons called Who's the Murderer? - basically, the same cast plays out a different murder mystery improv each episode. I haven't watched it yet but I've been meaning to - the latest season is on YT with English subs.

His birthday is the day after mine.

Want to see more? His tag is not very busy, but I try to reblog most things to @da-zhangwei. Feel free to contact me by any standard Tumblr method if you want more links!

Tagging people who said they'd be open to getting pulled into my Cpop fandoms, even though I don't have the edited Our Song episodes yet (consider this a preview): @json-derulo @poetry-protest-pornography @emmajanereading @percy-persephone @nuttysaladtree @thelima-aka-chickwriter @writergamermom @oneringtorulethem @trickybonmot @lovebird17 @erza155hasleftthebuilding

[insufferableprotagonistpoll]

Round 2

Unhinged Take on why Jenny Curran (Forrest Gump) is insufferable:

“a selfish, solipsistic, loose, no-morals kind of girl.”

Reason why that's unhinged:

Literally a woman who went through abuse and rape and apologized for any wrongdoing. I have issues with how she's portrayed, the way that she is used shows the conservative bias of the film, but the way she has been made out to be a villain by incels is so bizarre.

Unhinged Take on why Marinette Dupain-Cheng (Miraculous Ladybug) is insufferable:

marinette is a yandere/obsessive stalker and a bad person

Reason why that's unhinged:

miraculous is a media you inherently have to approach from a doylist prospective cause the writing of the characters is just That Bad being obsessive and weird about her crush is not unique to marinette it's generally just how romance is handled within the show for most characters however this is almost exclusively painted as a negative thing or used as a source for cringe comedy with the teenage girls. compare marinette's behavior to kagami chloe lila or rose (<-in princess fragrance specifically when shes crushing on a boy) the baseline behavior is pretty consistent we just see more of it from marinette due to her being the protagonist but what causes her to behave like that is cause thats how the writers view teenage girls. a specfic thing i take issue with is her knowing adrien's schedule although i do agree that its weird but 1. adrien is a celebrity 2. this is a gag from the first season (i stopped watching after season 3 but i have no memory of it being brought up again after this episode) and 3. a thing about adrien's character specifically is that he wants to be a normal kid n just hang out with his friends so knowing his schedule would help to plan group activities (cause at that point they mainly hang out in a group situation) when he could actually participate like again i think its fucking weird too n i am insisting that this is a show you cant engage with from an in universe perspective but it is actually somewhat reasonable she would know his schedule. the yandere thing is what i have the biggest issue with cause this show is extremely bad with handling any of its minority characters (the kung food thing, kagami constantly wearing what is basically just a school uniform for no reason and also the symbol on it is just the kanji for female etc) especially in regards to marinette being half chinese so take a second to think before calling a fictional 14 year old asian girl a yandere cause the writers are incapable of being normal about her heritage. the bad person thing is again the writing is absolutely dogshit and centers on what the writers think is good (usually centering on what would make the male characters happy) and also that an actual rule in the show's bible is that marinette must always be the one to learn a lesson while tweets from the creator of the show have consistently stated that adrien (the deuteragonist n marinette's love interest) is perfect and "it's the world that needs to change". ignoring whatever happens in universe that is an awfully biased and unbalanced way to have characters viewed by the narrative and written by the writers also the lessons the show tries to teach are often just morally bad things to teach to children so of course shes gonna come off worse cause shes the one who has to learn those lessons you can hate the character but be accurate about it and conscious of the various (often overlapping, looking at you shanghai special) ways racism n sexism influenced how shes written

[absolutebl]

I'm new to bl so I apologize if my question is ignorant af. I'm watching Between us and like it so far. I got into bl via KP (there's just something addictive in it), but my absolute favourite is Semantic error. However, after those 2 series I for a long time struggled to find something that will work for me, and WinTeam finally did it. I love the characters of the 2 of them, there's even some plot, and the chemistry is through the roof. However, it kind of weirds me out that Win wanted Team to call him hia during lovemaking while at the same time him having two actual brothers is a huge part of who he is. Am I wrongly connecting "hia" with biological brothers? Maybe "hia" is something more in line with "bro"? Or not? Anyway, I love your approach to bl, and your humor.

No apologies necessary! Always delighted to meet a new fan. Welcome to the madness.

Ah, hia is more like phi, which means it operates as kind of a title and/or a pronoun as well as, in this context, an endearment. (more on honorifics, honorific pronouns, and polite particles here). The direct translation is put up as “bro” but it’s a lot more complicated than that. 

For example, in English we may call a lover baby. That’s weird right? I mean think about it. Why would you call someone you’re fucking the title of a child? Creepy. Couples may continue to do such a thing even when they have babies of their own.

Or how about daddy? 

Or in Kdrama’s the use of oppa? (Girlfriends to their older boyfriends, also means older brother, female to male) 

Cultures tend to re-adopt familial terms for lovers a lot. It’s no weirder when it’s “sibling” (phi, hia, hyung, oppa, noona) than when it’s “child” (baby) or “father” (daddy), is it? Especially when the origin culture has a much more codified system of sibling honorifics and familial dynamics as part of their education and workplace environments (which both Korea and Thailand do, linguistically). 

Actually, endearment use for familial honorifics is common in many collectivist cultures. I’ve been becoming more and more aware of the use of 哥 ge (older brother) 弟 di (younger brother) and 姐 jie (older sister) in Chinese romances. And I do not speak ANY Mandarin. (Incidentally that’s the same jay as in Thai for older sister of Chinese decent, the feminine version of hia.) 

In Semantic Error during yaja time (at the bar right before their big mutual kiss) JaeYoung drops some of THE sluttiest hyungs every dripped out of the mouths of babes. 

Hyung also means older brother, or roughly that. Again it’s also acts as an honorific. In this case it’s a blatant seduction. Prior to this he was very hung up on SangWoo’s utter refusal to use hyung on him, and upset that he simultaneously allowed oppa + a nick name from Ryu Ji Hye. I mean there was a respect thing going on there, but also an affection thing. 

Here’s Asian Honorifics & BL - a quick & dirty guide, with examples 

Meanwhile KinnPorche, Semantic Error, and Between Us is an interesting trifecta. Some others you might like? 

From Thailand: Bad Buddy, TharnType, Cutie Pie, Lovely Writer, Manner of Death

From Taiwan: We Best Love, HIStory 2: Crossing the Line, HIStory 3: Trapped, See You After Quarantine?, DNA Says Love You 

From Japan: Old Fashion Cupcake, Seven Days 

From Korea: To My Star, Blueming, Long Time No See, Roommates of Poongduck 304 

From China: Addicted: Heroin

All of these have pairs with killer chemistry and a decent story. 

[akookminsupporter]

Excuse my language but I hate it so much when the tannies do something that is not viewed as normal by society I guess? and some people act like the tannies personally killed their whole family and wronged 6 generations of their family tree just by doing that thing. Like... Be for fucking real. How many times do we have to say that they are grown ass adults and they can do whatever the fuck they want. They have relationships, they smoke, they drink, they do whatever the fuck they want. And I am not their mother to tell them what to do. And neither is you. (not you, Rosie, general 'you') They are fully aware if something is not healthy. But they can still do it?! Because it's their choice?! Let them live their fucking lives however they want to. We are not here to dictate what they can and cannot do. 1) I really wish these people would just straight up left the fandom and never came back and 2) I can't even say oh it's young fans who don't know better because jesus christ it is not just young fans saying this bullshit.

Anyway. Sorry for my rant. I've just been very annoyed with people trying to act like their mothers...

I imagine this is because of the photos that were circulating of Jungkook with an alleged cigarette and now they are saying that they were edited by one of his Chinese antis and that this person confirmed it on Weibo. Nobody asked me but even though I absolutely don't care if he smokes or not, the pictures do look edited, Who the hell holds a cigarette like that? And I don't know if I'm crazy but in one of them, he seemed to be doing one of the moves from the choreography of his song. But now let's talk more about the hypocrisy and immaturity of this fandom. The comments I saw regarding the photos were really pathetic. "Cigarettes are bad" Well, so is alcohol but nobody says anything about it. Many in this fandom really believe that these men are pure children who have never committed "sins". Many believe they are perfect and that is absurd and unrealistic. Many in this fandom believe that they can dictate how these 7 men should behave or simply live their lives or manage their careers and it is ABSURD and stupid.

The members of bts are respectful enough in front of the camera, while they are working but in their private lives, in their free time they can do whatever they want and no one can tell them otherwise. As long as they are not doing something illegal no one should care what they do or don't do in THEIR PRIVATE LIVES.

Yes, cigarettes are bad but they are the ones who will take the consequences of their actions, no one else. That they set a bad example? You should be smart enough to know that you shouldn't do what someone else does just because they are famous.

This is not something I am very interested in talking about because there is honestly nothing to talk about. I don't care what they put in their body or not, it's their body and they can do with it what they want. I will do the same.

[thereismusicinmysoul]

Work was closed today because of an ice storm, so I took the unexpected day off to finally finish the pleated wrap skirt I've been working on since early November! I got really rambly about the whole thing so here's a picture of the finished product and I'll drop the rest below the cut.

This project came about because I've been watching The Sleuth of the Ming Dynasty with some friends and I DESIRE a swooshy skirt. While I didn't follow any patterns and wasn't setting out to make the same exact style of skirt, it was definitely influential. (This skirt brought to you by numerous tutorial videos, including one on Chinese mamianqun's and one on Korean hanbok's, and an absolute refusal to actually follow anyone's instructions. No pattern, we die like men)

It's been almost 10 years since I've done any sewing, so I decided to buy sheets from the thrift store so that I wouldn't cry as hard if things went horribly or I had to trash the project. (Don't get me wrong, I still cried. Because Oh Golly did things go wrong. But it wasn't as tragic as if I'd used full price fabric from Joann's, ya feel?) So from there the idea grew from "pleated wrap skirt" (my rationale: I don't have to be precise in my measurements, straight hem, but still lots of swoosh) to "make this skirt out of a queen size top sheet with as little waste as possible" because who doesn't love a challenge?

....and oh what a challenge it ended up. I plotted things out in my notebook, planned how I would cut everything, and oh let me tell you: rationally I knew how big the sheet was. But laying it out to cut it? So huge. So much fabric. It covered my entire bedroom floor. All of this going into a single skirt oh god what have I gotten myself into? But this part actually went the smoothest of the whole process! Because...

I wasn't doing normal pleats. Since I was trying to make the swooshiest dress with as much of the fabric as I had, I did "deep pleats" which is. A normal pleat but if you shove more fabric inside the pleat. No one wanted to explain to me exactly how to do this. The one person I found who did gave me MATH about it. And boy am I bad at math. Used a pillowcase to practice and wrap my head around how the math worked (the intangible makes no sense to me, I must hold it in my hands), sorted the math, started pleating for real! Measured my pinned pleats and it came up way shorter than anticipated. Have I mentioned it's been a hot minute since I've sewn? Also this was my first attempt ever at pleats. SO! I unpinned everything, made my deep pleats slightly less deep, pinned them all up again, and then blessedly listened to my Grammy's advice to baste the pleats first. Because horror of horrors, my measurements were right the first time and now my fabric was too long for the waistband I'd already put Quite A Lot Of Effort Into. Like, it's a wrap skirt. I would've just made do. But no. It wouldn't even fit.

Within this process, I sewed together my three skirt panels, put in a pocket (oh the choices I made. This pocket did not survive to the completion of the skirt because it was BAD. I was terrified that the fabric wouldn't hold up to the weight of me dripping my phone into it and covered the ENTIRE pocket in interfacing. This would be fine if I'd wanted it to fuck up the way the skirt lay, but this was not in fact what I wanted. I am however very proud of the placement I worked out for it, it sits inside one of the pleats so it isn't visible), hemmed the WHOLE FUCKING THING (look. Again. I knew it was a lot of fabric. But it did not occur to me that I would be hemming fucking 240" across the bottom, plus 30" up either side. I used ALL of my pins to accomplish this), and made a very lovely waistband and ties.

Now it is at this point that I went out of town for thanksgiving, remembered I had other Christmas crafting plans, started a new job working more hours, and left this skirt to languish until a few weeks ago when I finally had the heart to rip out all of those pleats, remembered I wanted to redo the pocket while I was here (and let me tell you, I needn't have worried about the strength of the pocket. I had that fucker in there GOOD. I think it took longer picking out that single pocket than it took taking out all of the pleats), and then set about redoing everything.

Now something you may not know about me is I exist in somewhat of a state of chaos. I try to write things down to negate this, but uh. Guess who didn't write down where she left off, and couldn't decipher the mad scientist notes that made sense in the heat of the moment, but not several months later? That would be me. Thankfully I was able to sort things out, get the pocket put back in, got the pleats pinned in record time, and praise whatever deity you may recognize, it was the right length this time! So this afternoon, I attached it to the waistband, did a very lovely "stitch in the ditch" (that I had to take out because something got fucked up in the back and it wouldn't lay right. I never regretted how closely I matched the thread to the fabric more than I did in that moment), REDID all that stitching, and now I have a skirt!

Ultimately, I don't actually know if I'll wear it. I no longer own many tops that lay well with a skirt without making me hate my body, and I don't know that I like the length. Maybe a shopping trip and cutting off several inches (...oh god I'll have to re-hem it...) will make me like it on myself better, but even if I don't and I never wear it, this has been a really fun and fulfilling project! I'm satisfied just with having completed it and I've learned a lot in the process! And hey, for going into this refusing to follow a pattern, with a goal of "use the entire sheet in the skirt" I think it came out pretty nicely. Plus, if nothing else, I can pleat like an absolute pro now.

[xsweetcatastrophe]

You Broke Me First.

part 4.

Zoe managed to find her bearings, call an uber, and get home in one piece.

It was early afternoon by the time she got out of the shower. She took an extra long shower, staying under the hot water longer than usual. Nothing could make her feel clean enough after the night she had.

She stepped out and into a fluffy towel, and wrapped her hair up in a 2nd towel. She Ordered Chinese off UberEats, put lotion on her legs and put on the baggiest pair of sweatpants she owned. She pulled on an old Columbia T-Shirt, and started combing her hair. She made her way into the living room, lit a candle and grabbed her laptop and recorder. She placed them on the cushion next to her and grabbed her phone and her charger, setting up camp in the living room. By then, she received a notification her food had arrived. She settled back onto the couch with her laptop in her lap and a plate of chicken and broccoli on the coffee table in front of her. She pressed play on the recorder and took a deep breath.

Let's begin.

5 hours later, she was done.

She was proofreading for the 10th time, making sure everything was perfect. Believe it or not, she had a lot of material on her recorder. After a drink or two, he really opened up and became comfortable talking with her. He let his guard down and was candid, talking about his hesitations with taking certain jobs and his struggles adjusting to life under a microscope.

It was hard for Zoe to listen to, as what she heard on the tape recorder was not the asshole she woke up next to. The man on the recorder was just that; a man who had a very public job, but also had fears, concerns, hobbies, a family, etc. He was human. She learned about the man Cillian Murphy, Irish native who was a failed musician. Who likes to pour jalapenos on top of his popcorn. Who reads poetry in his spare time. And isn't that what Zoe went into journalism for? To learn and connect with people?

Zoe sighed and saved the doc and attached it to an email to her editor. Holding her breath, she typed a quick "Cillian Murphy Piece" in the subject line, and clicked send.

She exhaled. Done.

She rolled her neck, normally she would treat herself to a beer but her stomach churned at the thought. She grabbed her remote and turned on Netflix and selected Suits, picking up where she left off.

She took a bite of her food, now cold.

Ok, so maybe I slept with Cillian Murphy, She thought. Best case is, no one will ever believe it. Worst case is, people saw. and they do believe it.

"My life is a fucking joke" Zoe said out loud, to absolutely no one.

Zoe heard her phone go off, the notification she assigned for a new email.

Zoe assumed it was her editor confirming receipt of the email, like he usually does. However, she stared at her phone.

Something was nagging at her. An alarm went off in her head; this wasn't a confirmation. Her father always said trust your gut, and her gut - although currently a little bloated and full of Chinese - was never wrong. This wasn't a confirmation email.

She opened her phone and sure enough she had an email from her boss with the subject line "Tomorrow"

Zoe,

Just got an email that concerns you - can we please meet at 10am tomorrow? Ms. Hannah Woods will be joining us from Elite.

Thanks,

Donna

Who the fuck is Hannah? Elite? Elite what?

Zoe loved her boss, but she was so vague. She had a habit of talking about people as if Zoe knew them.

Was Hannah an employee? She opened up linkedIn and typed in Hannah woods. Zoe found her page - Hannah was a publicist at Elite Talent.

Zoe closed out LinkedIn and opened up google and searched Elite Talent, finding their page. She poked around the website, and found a list of publicists and their contact info. She found Hannah's and clicked on her. It brought her to Hannah's own page on the Elite Talent website, her picture filling her computer screen along with a little blurb about herself. On the side, it had a list of clients that she managed. Zoe's heart dropped.

Hannah was Cillian's publicist.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. He told his publicist. Zoe thought, heart beating out of her chest.

"is this because I insulted your stupid Guinness??" She groaned out loud, her head in her hands.

Zoe begrudgingly responded to Donna's email, saying she'll be there.

Zoe slammed her laptop shut, stood up, and made her way to the kitchen.

So much for not drinking" she said out loud, grabbing a beer.

tags: @lau219

[centrally-unplanned]

How much do you know about Dien Bien Phu? I, as a typical American, know almost nothing except that it was a major French disaster, that eventually led to the American Vietnam war. However, i fell into a YoutTube rabbit hole, and it changed my perspective. I think it was one of the most impressive marvels of combat logistics, planning, and ingenuity in military history.

The French made some major blunders, but i think it's important to un derstand why they put a major airstrip in a valley surrounded by mountains: The French Foreign Legion considered it a complete impossibility that the Vietnamese could put artillery on the mountains. From that persepctive, the fortress at Dien Bien Phu was an amazing idea. A well-supplied forward air base that is basically impregnable allows you to completely dominant the war. The French could have operated with impunity. The battle-hardened French military and engineers were absolutely certain that no one could move artillery up to the rim of the bowl - at least without modern equipment. Its not like these were guys fresh out of the academy, these dudes built the Maginot line, they fought a full-scale modern war, they were phenomenal engineers. They climbed the Alps, the fought in Fortress Europa. They knew their business. They were safe in their elevated bowl.

Instead, those hard little fuckers in the pajamas pulled post-WW2 field artillery pieces and modern AA batteries up mountains with their bare hands and some effing ropes. They did the impossible. They proved, once again, that wars are won by planning, logistics, and hard fucking work. Bravery is great. Genius is great. Strategic and tactical mastery of excellent skills. But being a good logistician and being willing to dig forever will win more wars than anything.

That, and SPEED. The moment the French extended themselves too far, the Viet Minh were ready. They exploited the advantage lighting fast.

I am just so impressed by the Viet Minh achievement at Dien Bien Phu, and would love to find more information on their side of things. Just incredible what they did.

Sounds like you know more than me! You can just make this your own reblog you know, no need to bury your essay in the illusion of the ask ^_^ We like essays here!

For my own thoughts I know some, I guess I can share a few:

-Okay, bear with me; there is a Malcom Gladwell essay about the Full Court Press strategy in college basketball from 2009 (absolutely *chef kiss* start here) which digs into the "effort vs ability" paradigm. Now Gladwell is as always full of shit, don't listen to him on the object level question of how effective the FCP strat is, but the paradigm is a good theoretical tool - that in a lot of places you don't expect, effort can substitute for a lack of ability and close disparities. In the essay he discusses T. E. Lawrence's attack on the city of Aqaba (which he overly credits to Lawrence over Auda Abu Tayi or the other British advisor, Stewart Newcombe, but w/e), which was heavily defended on the coast but its artillery batteries didn't cover the desert in the rear - why would it, its hundreds of miles of barren wasteland. The insight of the Arab Revolt forces barely counts as an insight until you see it the right way - just cross it anyway! The enemy has a greater 'ability' in firepower, which can cover a dozen approaches, but not all of them - so if you ignore the gigantic human cost of crossing the desert, you obviously attack the weak point. They just didn't conceive of enemy willing to essentially suffer that much, the Arab Revolt's true strength was apply effort in quantities the Ottomans were unwilling to consider. Dien Bien Phu is the same - the French were essentially correct that hand-dragging artillery pieces into the mountain ridges was virtually impossible, the British or the Chinese wouldn't have done it. Insurgencies are built on the principle of effort overcoming ability, though - if they had the ability they wouldn't be the insurgency. These are the gaps that insurgencies hunt for, where the enemy treats you like a 'normal' army and assumes you wont simply grind away at the problem. Dien Bien Phu is the moment where that gap emerged, and the Vietminh were ready for it.

-The other point is to downplay this a bit, in that whenever you see a stellar victory you should always look at the other perspective; if it happened, maybe it wasn't that low odds. The French in Vietnam were a classic case of War Without Strategy - after WW2 France was a broken state being built from the ground up, America had ruthlessly pushed the Western European powers into paring back their imperial ambitions, and the domestic populace was sketchy in its support at best. France had set up the State of Vietnam as a quasi-free nation, something they did have hopes for in the 1940's but by 1954 its lack of viability was on the wall, yet France could not diplomatically admit to that fact. As such into the 1950's France had minimal strategy - French commanders were simply aiming to not-lose and save face for their eventual return to Europe.

Individual ideas would bubble up - like the idea behind Dien Bien Phu, baiting the Vietminh into taking huge casualties attacking it as part of the "hedgehog" strategy a la Na San in 1952. But notice how this...isn't a strategy? If *inflicting casualties* was gonna win France the war it would have been over 5 years ago. It has a hint of a strategy, sure, but in the main its an idea born of the fact that France was unwilling to commit the resources needed to actually have a chance of winning, but was unwilling to admit defeat, and was filling the gap with hail mary's.

The fact that the Vietminh had already fought a similar battle at Na San, lost, and was able to learn lessons for when France offered a repeat is telling; their victory is maybe not that surprising in this light. France could afford few defeats and had no capacity to end the war, the Vietnamese could afford endless defeats and were bent on fighting for the long haul. Of course such a grind would eventually, probabilistically, tip in Vietnam's favour and hand them the victory they needed; in a sense France was hoping for just that, an excuse to withdraw. Dien Bien Phu is the logical culmination of the politico-strategic balance of the two forces.