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fumifooms · 26 days

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You’re the resident chilchuck expert, so I was wondering about it there’s any canon evidence that he did smoke or drink alcohol when the kids were younger. I always thought it was something he picked up due to the strain of long jobs, when the kids were already older, but you seem to think differently and I was wondering if there was anything in canon that made you think that way!

Now that you mention it I guess it’s true there’s no evidence he did. Smoking we literally only know he does at all because of one post-canon panel where he has a pipe, so no, maybe this stick-looking thing in the panel below too though, I’m not familiar with medieval blunts eh. We’ve only gotten one panel of him and his daughters interacting when he was younger so that’s not too insightful on that end, and every time we see him young and freckled it’s in a job context so again not really where we’d expect him to be drinking. The earliest proof (/heavy implication since we don’t see inside his cup I guess) is 3 years before canon when Laios hired him, where he’s at a bar, classily placed in front of all the bottles ✨

Yes alcohol is almost certainly a way through which he copes especially with stress, so if we go with the theory he started around when work got stressful, well… Chilchuck started working as a dungeon diver ~10 years ago so when he was ~19, making Mei, Fler and Puck ~6 and ~4 respectively, so from that draw the ‘stressful enough to start drinking’ line wherever. We don’t know what he did before that with any certainty, and it could be he did odd jobs, lived off mostly mutual aid and community work, or just focused on only raising the girls. Half-foots tend to be poor and I see a lot of that in Chilchuck specifically so I don’t think he could have afforded to not have some paying work though.

Alright, so then why do I think he did drink when the girls were younger?

I give a more complete rundown of the info we do have on his alcoholism & his family with panels and references + all the speculation I make from it here. But the most targeted and objective answer I can give is:

Of course there’s just very very little we know of Chilchuck’s life with his family, and I think that’s by design too. I think the details being up in the air is to allow more nuance of the topic, like, will trying to reconcile go well, is their relationship salvageable? We don’t know, because we don’t know. So the message of giving hope a chance even if it’s a long shot, that things could truly go either way, is more relevant, impactful and meta in that way. How long was he usually away for work travels into dungeons here and there? How did he act with them? All we can really do is "it’s likely that", it’s a game of which way we think it’s more implied. There’s no right and wrong answer, it’s all Marcille-like larping the events out.

My main reason for thinking he did is that his father died from overdrinking and Chilchuck is very aware of that. He mentions his death casually in the extra about their stance in alcohol and in his Adventurer’s Bible profile, etc. He acts towards the alcohol presumably the same way his father did: with abandon, uncaring for the health effects, probably happily too considering Chil says "dying doing something you love is a good way to go". Very nonchalant. So you see what I’m saying here right, wether he started early or late, his view of alcoholism is very influenced by what he saw of his father growing up, it’s something he’s always been aware of and saw in a mostly positive light, something that was inherited you could say. It’s something that was normalized to him from a young age. Regardless or where it goes from there I do think this part is pretty inarguable. If he views it positively and we know that in the present alcohol is his favorite food that he loveees, why would he have held out on it? Personally that all makes me think he started drinking very young, especially since I don’t think they limited alcohol to age as much as modern standards (and I mean, teen drinking is obviously still a thing). And here you could argue, maybe his father only started being more alcoholic later when Chilchuck moved out, or something! And to that there’s nothing I can say except I think that’s a strained theory, and that Chil might even have largely cut contact with his family after moving out (since he and siblings are listed as almost strangers and he doesn’t seem to have much emotional attachment to his parents, but also we know he rents out his place to "a relative"), but it’s true we have no evidence. "I’ve picked up the same unhealthy substance abuse as my father haha! No big deal right haha" repeated several times to me just reeks of intergenerational trauma, & the alcoholism gene as they call it. Like effortless sliding into drinking as if it’s second nature, it’s natural after all, it’s normal after all, it just makes sense, it makes you feel good and that’s what matters.

BUT from my interpretation then we have a whole other layer: Alcohol is of course not all bad always. I think he’s always liked alcohol and drank it on occasion and it brought him joy etc etc, but I think here the implication in the question is, how much effect did his drinking have on the family relations and how early? And that isn’t so much about when him drinking started but when the alcoholism started. Addiction is defined by a habitual need, that has negative effects from filling that need (physical, psychological, social, etc) and negative effects from withdrawal. If Chilchuck drinks to cope and he can’t not cope without it, that’s addiction, if it affects his relationships, if it’s a need he has, it’s addiction. Addiction can be very insidious or look very casual, and how much people around the person are affected by it is case by case. Cheerful drunks can be sooo annoying and uncomfortable though let me tell you. Drunks are drunks. And this sounds harsh, but even if people around them don’t mind drunks it’ll still have some effects here and there, living with one can be such a challenge, ily drunks good luck with everything much like Chilchuck you deserve good things 🫡　

Ok so with the dad thing and the "ok well maybe he’s always drunk casually but it grew worse with time around when he started working as a dungeon diver" precision made, the other bit of info we have that can inform this is that Chilchuck is on a harsh diet and that alcohol is a hunger suppressant. We know Chilchuck "used to be fine not eating for two days", that literally on screen to quench his hunger so it doesn’t keep him awake he goes to drink water, drinking is his instinct to hunger. Again alcohol is a hunger suppressant and if you want info on that the internet has a lot of research and anecdotes about it. He diets to be light enough to not trigger traps, so it’s something he’d have started after dungeon diving most likely. Between the stress and the diet, yes it’s extremely likely he started going harder on alcohol after he started working in dungeons. There’s arguments on wether two days without eating is less bad for half-foots than humans, but apart from smaller portions there’s nothing that indicates half-foots should get less than 3 meals a day. They need less food but that’s because their bodies are smaller: the need is proportional to the body, not smaller than others’ races, the % of need is similar even if the kg amount of food isn’t. There’s also a popular headcanon with support basis that half-foots run hot and have a faster heartrate and whatnot, and that points towards a faster metabolism rather than a slower one: a bigger need for eating rather than a smaller one. He has the same bmi, 18, as Mickbell, but perhaps because Chil is much taller he’s less intensely visibly underweight with ribs showing than Mick during the bath extra, it’s most apparent when he becomes tallman.

Alcohol is something so important and omnipresent in his character that I have trouble believing it’s something that was part of only a small fraction of his life. It’s his immediate go-to, his no-brainer solution to a good time, I’ve sort of always assumed especially after looking at his family that it’s something he discovered decently young. Like he just acts like someone who’s always had alcohol to fall back on and started young idk. Alcohol is one of his 5 keywords. Alcoholism is very ingrained into his world view and life, his "it doesn’t matter" stance his ‘work hard play hard’ mentality his idea that the world is harsh so you get relief where you can, so it just makes sense to me that it’s always been in his life, if not actively then at least looming.

So yes, in summary, my take: Alcohol was always something he wholly enjoyed to an unwise level, but it could have been considered casual until he started working into dungeons and his need for it on a regular basis intensified. Alcohol has always had positive association to him as far as we see, so when it started being a problem he didn’t see it as such. To quote him, "I drink anytime I get the opportunity to". Why always? Approval of father’s alcoholism. Why alcoholism at all? Diet + stress & coping mechanism & emotional stunting + relationship issues, and she decided she had enough after they went out for drinks.

Conclusion

Chilchuck having drunk from a young age makes sense to me and it’s the strongest narrative angle I see on the table, but that’s objectively a me opinion, yes! There’s no evidence, moreso there’s canon basis and supporting info, but it’s all very left up to interpretation. I’ve made my own interpretations of things from the scraps we see, like everyone else making Chilwife and daughters content. Wether you have a stance on the topic or prefer to leave it vague in your takes, it’ll be a matter of what you think makes most sense, or what you’d rather believe I suppose (which is literally fine)

There’s a lot of subjectivity in even just setting up causal links like you probably noticed during this and I was careful with my word choices, because we’re just extrapolating from what we see and unless Kui states it explicitly from a reliable mouth all we can do is have informed opinions on most things. This particular interpretation is influenced by other details I’ve come to form about my interpretation of Chilchuck too, the more psychological and emotional sides of him and the timeline and how his marriage even happened, unplanned pregnancy imo. Like I hope you see what I mean, this wasn’t supposed to be a speculation post just a quick simple answer but there’s sort of just no other and concise but complete way with the subjectivity nuance to put "maybe it could be yes because of this but maybe it could be no because of this" haha

#Also he’s a lot like my own dad so to me with how he is it’s just an immediate “oh yeah he has always drunk duh of course”#So i can admit to bias. Or to specialized knowledge and authority on analysis idk in which way that tips the balance in my favor or not lol #Dungeon meshi #chilchuck tims #meta #alcoholism #This post was meant to be short :|#-slaps chilchuck’s family- this baby can fit in so much projection #I have like 3 chil alcoholism & chil family fic wips rn weeeeee #I’m the kind of alcoholic’s kid who grew up to never touch alcohol btw so like. Ik Chil could not have drunk young i just think he did #Can we appreciate the alcohol opinion & resistance chart actually. So often in media it’s either “alcohol’s a source of fun yippee” and #“alcohol is evil”. Thank you Dunmeshi for diversity of opinion thank you for nuance i rarely feel so seen #Izutsumi deserves to tell Chilchuck he stinks #AND BY THE WAY I hope you don’t feel talked down on anon. Ik you seem to have your own interpretation already & that’s good #sometimes i was adressing like. The General Public TM more tha you which is why I spent time on some things like ‘think what you want’ etc #Okok i hope that covers it. Help where does the time go #It’s the sort of thing that makes Kui’s masterful storytelling by implying things here and there until it forms a big picture frustrating #for meta. Like! You can’t prove Chilchuck has been poor/grew up in an empoverished family/environment. There’s no evidence #but also if you cannot tell me with a straight face that he isn’t and hasn’t like omg. But then it takes 30 pages to explain how he’s coded #Stop showing and not telling Kui smh /j #Ask

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not-poignant · 27 days

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Hi Pia

Feel free to ignore if this is unwelcome, but have you ever thought about publishing traditionally to sublimate your income and draw in new readers? I know you've self published two books already and that you didn't feel like they did very well, but maybe the experience would be different if someone else was in charge of marketing and all the other business stuff?

Obviously everyone's experience is different but as an author myself who's published both trad and self, traditional publishing has been a completely different experience and has allowed me to focus more on writing because I'm not the one responsible for advertising/marketing/financing anymore.

There are a ton of literary agents nowadays that want to represent diverse and lgbtqia+ fiction, some of them even in Australia.

Websites like Reedsy, AgentQuery and Jerichowriters have extensive directories to find literary agents.

(This is lengthy folks so I'm putting the other two parts (and my response) under a read more! Also putting it under a read more so the anon can skip my response since it's very 'here's all the reasons I can't do this' and they just might not want to read that, lmao)

(continued -> )

Trad publishing houses have better resources for marketing and helping authors get more attention than any self publishing website could.

Obviously most authors, unless they're really prolific, don't get a huge advance (the average is between $1000 - $5000) but getting your foot in the door or on the traditional publishing "ladder' so to speak can have a huge benefit for your serials. Because it gives you more exposure. Plus it's in the agent's best interest to find a publishing house that accepts stories that contain darker themes and negotiate the best deal for you.

For some reason places like Amazon and the like accept and keep up more "dark" books that are traditionally published than they do with self pub ones. Maybe because they have more respect or leniency for publishing houses? I have no idea. But you could use this to your advantage. I think I remember you mentioning that writing novels felt quite isolating to you? But you already have 2 completed novels (3 if you count the fae one) that you could potentially revisit or rewrite to your liking and get them represented by agents.

You already have a loyal readership and that's very attractive to trad pub houses and agents.

As well as trad publishing, you could also make s simple website that doesn't require much maintenance. It could be just a landing page that says something about you and then has links to your tumblr and patreon where you're more active. That way you increase the chances of getting your serials found by additional readers and also come across looking more "professional". Not that you're not professional now. You are and I admire you greatly, but the unfortunate reality is a lot of people still judge by appearances and some will be more drawn to an author's website than a tumblr page, at least at first. So I think having a simple landing page would open up another door for you to benefit from.

Trad publishing is work but definitely not as much as self publishing, and you can continue on with your serials. Getting an agent can be time consuming but I personally believe the pros outweigh the cons and I also believe that your stories would be a huge treasure to the growing lgbtqia+ market. Seriously there needs to be more!

These are just suggestions and thoughts and like I said before, feel free to ignore. But I know you've mentioned wanting to grow your career in the past and I genuinely believe you can do so with some of these pathways.

Okay, my response. Posting this because firstly I think the suggestions could work very well for other authors reading this! And I hope they take the advice to note, and secondly because I haven't talked about this for a hot minute so let's talk about it again.

So the TL;DR is yes I have considered traditional publishing. I have actually been traditionally published in short stories, poetry, and also had my art published on covers and re: interior illustrations. But my Fae Tales works got soundly rejected when I sent them to publishing houses that were doing open calls for that sort of material. I've never heard back from an agent and I never expect to, heh.

Now for a bit more detail

I have been traditionally published before (it's how I got my writing out there long before I ever wrote serials), and yes, I have approached publishers with my writing since then. In fact Tradewinds was written for the traditional publishing market, and it got soundly rejected, and then shelved. The reasons it was rejected ran the gamut from 'I don't like that these fae eat humans no one is going to relate to these people' (while the editor then went on to publish vampire books idk) to 'There's too much worldbuilding you can't expect readers to keep up with this' to 'Your stories are too long, no one wants to read characters talking all the time.'

Meanwhile in my online serials I was getting feedback like 'my favourite chapters are the ones where the characters just sit in a room and talk' lol.

The traditional publishing world is also not quite as utopian for most authors as you make it seem. I'm friends with a lot of authors who are traditionally published because that's the world I came from, and unless they're solely in KU and doing generic rapid release formula romances, none of them are making that much money. Certainly not enough to live off. It may have been that you were very fortunate, anon, but I know hundreds more traditionally published authors that left trad pub to make money, and I know about 5 in trad pub personally who are making enough to live off of.

Only one of those is really writing what she truly loves to write, and even then, publishing houses have refused to commit to her entire fantasy series (and she's regularly in 'Top 10/20 Women Fantasy Authors in the World' lists) and forced her to finish the series prematurely. Something I never ever have to worry about in self pub.

The reality is that in trad pub these days, you're still in charge of most of your marketing unless you're one of the big earners for the publishing house. In fact I'd be expected to keep even more of a social media and marketing presence than I do now. I don't do almost any of the things you're supposed to do as an author in marketing to be appealing. I don't have a Facebook author account. I don't have an Instagram author account. I don't maintain or regularly send out newsletters (which automatically puts me in the like 0.05% of authors who make money doing this lmao).

I don't know if you ever have looked that closely into what m/m publishing houses expect from most of their authors, but the newsletter swaps, cover releases, review circuits, interview circuits and more are fucking grueling. We're expected to be responsible for our advertising and our marketing to a fairly massive degree. Some traditionally published in m/m still have to pay for their release blitzes out of pocket. These publishing houses, by and large, do not offer advances. You say most authors don't get large advances. I don't think most authors in this arena get offered advances at all unless they're somehow miraculously acquired by a Big 4.

We're expected to have an already established social media presence because of that (that's why it's so appealing to publishers that we have social media presences already, anon, so we can market, they can save money, and we still see only a minimal cut from the royalties).

And you still have to focus on your finances, because publishing houses like Dreamspinner straight up didn't pay a whole bunch of authors for so long they destroyed careers. They still haven't paid some of their authors. And they're still running a business and people still buy their books.

Trad publishing houses have better resources for marketing and helping authors get more attention than any self publishing website could.

This is true if a) they're a big publishing house and not an indie publisher of which most LGBTQIA+ publishing houses are and b) they're willing to use them on you.

The authors that make the most money get the most resources. If they believe you're going to earn back your advance and move thousands or tens of thousands of units per book, then yes, you will get those resources.

I have been told so many times now - even from friends who run publishing houses, including one who works at HarperCollins - that my work will never be mainstream enough to have broad appeal. They literally told me not to keep trying re: trad pub, because that was my dream for a long time. These folks have given me rock solid advice in the past, it's one of the reasons I'm doing so well now via Patreon + Ream. But they were like (paraphrasing) 'you don't write 60-80k romances and you don't want to and that's not your strength anyway, you're multi-genre which makes you hard to market, you write psychological and literary trauma recovery which is hard to market, you write character studies which are hard to market, publishing houses often don't commit to series anymore if the first two don't move units and if they pulled the plug you'd be contractually obliged to never finish that series until your contract was up.' I could go on, but it was like yeah...actually. Fair.

They do, but most publishing houses want very formulaic dark romance which is not what I write.

I have a 300k omegaverse slowburn that still hasn't had any penetrative sex in it, anon. Publishing houses don't want that. They don't expect anyone will wait 4 full length novels to get to literally a single penetrative sex scene.

But you already have 2 completed novels (3 if you count the fae one) that you could potentially revisit or rewrite to your liking and get them represented by agents.

If I rewrote them to my liking, trad pub wouldn't want them. They'd be too long! I think agents etc. take one look at me and go 'oh god, no thank you!' I'm not an easy sell, by any means.

Plus I'm very e.e about all of that with the knowledge that they then give me only about 10-15% of the royalties on the sales, vs. self-pub where I get around 70%, or subscription where I around 80% of it. When someone subscribes to me, they don't have to worry about 85-90% of their subscription fee going to a publishing house. I don't have to think about how many thousands and thousands of books I'd have to sell to make the same amount that I do now via subscription.

As well as trad publishing, you could also make s simple website that doesn't require much maintenance.

If it was that simple, I'd be doing it. I don't mean this in a facetious way, I mean it in a: I've made a lot of websites, in fact I run one at the moment not connected to my writing (I've been running it for so long it's now in its 20s and can probably has a driver's license). I find it so tedious that I barely remember to check in on it. But forgetting about it means there's always maintenance to keep up with when I get back to it.

Running websites is simpler than it used to be, but it's still not simple. There's hosting and hosting costs, there's server changes, there's back-end maintenance etc. I'm considering it for down the track, but there's a reason I decided to go the route of Patreon over my own site. There are authors (like Christopher Hopper) who actually do subscription through their own domain, but it's a lot of work.

Even placeholder sites are still work. They need updating, details change, story titles changing etc. Maintaining my Patreon + Ream About pages is enough, they're always both a little out of date, lol.

Not that you're not professional now.

Oh no, I mean from a 'traditional publisher looking at me to see what kind of candidate I am' I'm really not though. Like I said, I don't have the newsletter (100 subscribers who get one newsletter a year is not really a newsletter), I don't have the Facebook/Tiktok/Insta/Twitter/Bluesky/Threads accounts, etc. I write multi-genre across multiple steam levels, and I'm allergic to writing serials shorter than 150k. One of my best performing original serials was an 800k contemporary story with no sex in it but a lot of BDSM. It can't be marketed as clean or sweet, it's not high steam, an entire chapter is 'boy saves snail from rain.' Also he was cruel to animals, so not exactly what I'd call a sympathetic main.

And yet that story did so well for me via Patreon + Ream, because people want the kinds of stories that publishing houses generally don't want and I happen to be writing them.

Anon I just literally do not believe an agent would want to represent me. I have 0% belief in that. Not from a self-deprecating angle but from a 'I am not a good bet for the trad market' perspective. From a 'I have so many friends who are trad pubbed authors who stare at me like I'm insane for writing serials as long as I do' perspective. From a 'professionals in the industry have told me it's amazing I'm doing so well in serials because there's no way they'd take a risk on what I'm doing' perspective. From a 'just because it's queer and diverse doesn't mean it hits literally any other thing a trad pub is looking for' perspective. I've been doing this for 10 years. There are agents who represent work similar to mine who know what I'm doing and wouldn't touch me with a ten foot pole. They're not missing out on a trick, they know I'm not broad appeal, and they're right.

Also the only way I'd have the energy to manage trad pub is by quitting serials. And honestly, I never found trad pub all that much fun while I was doing it for non-novel stuff. It was fine, and it is nice to have my stuff out there, but it was a ton of admin and a lot of going back and forth between people who really only care about marketing a product, and that's great and what they excel at! But I'm too disabled to turn this job into something crushing just to potentially make more money, I'd rather just quit and go back onto a full Disability Pension. I can't see any way I still get to write the stories I want to write, in the way that I write them, and be remotely appealing to a single reputable trad pub or agent.

Also *gestures to everything in this article*

#asks and answers #pia on writing #pia on publishing #i appreciate your thoughts anon #and i'm so happy it's working out well for you #and that you're able to live off what you're doing #you are one of the rare outliers in the world of publishing #and i truly wish you all the success in the world #i do think a lot of your advice will go to help a lot of writers who sometimes check in #at my tumblr #but yeah no i don't even write that much 'dark' stuff in the classic sense #of what trad pub wants #right now the publishing world that i'm adjacent to #seems to view me as some kind of oddity #'i don't know how he's making an income off all this stuff that we know would never work for us'#'how odd and strange'#'best leave him alone'#most authors are thankfully not doing what i'm doing #in which case yes they should absolutely consider agent representation #and looking into trad pub #unfortunately i'm not like a CS Pacat #even though she's a role model for me #and when i tried to write for the more traditional market #which was perth shifters #i honestly really struggled

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bluegarners · 24 days

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What if the whole Batfamily takes a turn playing Nightwing and each has a cameo?

i would vomit tbh

#god. thats horrifying. pls dont speak it into existence anon #like i am of the opinion that no one should ever really inherit the nightwing mantle #no one really should have inherited robin but you know. here we are #it just feels soooo slimy and gross to think about someone taking over dick's second chance at freedom #writer's didn't appreciate what robin meant to dick and if nightwing gets passed around the same way... i might just have to give up comics #thats why that dan mora sketch of a possible bruce in nightwing suit severely altered made my skin crawl sm #like theres not even an attempt there to truly honor nightwing at all there- its all just been bruce-ified/batman-ified #and its grotesque

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antiendovents · 1 month

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hey its the anon that started it all. im so sorry about everything that went down. if i knew SAS would go after you or anyone else like that, i would have kept my stupid mouth shut. just feel so bad about accidentally unleashing all that on you. also yeah i admit i misunderstood one of their posts and im sorry about that too, the wording really made it seem like they were going endo. im still heartbroken about seeing them becoming proendo and a raging asshole in real time. i hope you are feeling better and getting away from that whole mess, im so sorry.

Dont worry about it anon, you made a mistake it's fine. You're not to blame for their actions. They chose to go after us, as an adult they should've known better but they didnt and now we're here unfortunately. We just hope we can move on and that we can just keep doing our usual blog stuff

#It's nice to hear from you og anon /gen #We appreciate the apology but it isn't your fault #anti endo #endos dni #did #did system #plural #system #actually did #alters #endos fuck off #did osdd

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averlym · 7 months

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gay stabbing a

#c??#ask me stuff???#getting progressively more incomprehensible with the asks are we /j #not that i don't appreciate them!#fun fact for you anon. while reading this ask <where can i run> came up on my music recapped playlist thing #which i suppose coincides fairly well #have a vincent for your efforts

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plulp · 7 months

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Eden swapped with Avery sounds like a nightmare for me idk why

Eden the businessman

Avery the hunter

Idk i really can’t think of anything - anon.com

thank you all three of you im so sorry it took me so long to do this i just had absolutely no ideas 😭😭😭😭😞😞😞 i hope you all like this!!!!

#asks #my art #anonymouse #the anon that Started the whole swap yeah sure I don’t fucking care if you don’t believe me anon #anon.com #guys we have got to start reeling in these anon names.#actually no just kidding we need to make them longer #thank you very much the anon tstwsysidfciydbm anon (acryonym) for sending the first ask i appreciate it very much :)#and anon.com im so sorry it took me so long to do this #you were completely and utterly right when you said sounds like a nightmare. it was a nightmare #i hope you like it #and to the anon that added some hcs. i owe you my life #without you i dont think i would have ever finished this #im sorry it took me so long #no more swaps okay not unless you have it all planned out #my brain isnt big enough to think up headcanons #eden the businessman #??????#avery the hunter #?????????????????#oh and baileys there too

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awkwardtickleetoo · 3 months

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Ler!Sapnap Week Day 1 - Antsy

heyyyy……… in the midst of a we’re so over… came an indescribable… we’re so back…. (kinda)

so!! this is a fic for @sleepy--anon ‘s ler!sapnap week!!! woooo!!!! i know it’s a little bit late, but better late than never, right?? and i have two other ones for ler!sap week coming out as soon as i get them finished so it’ll basically be like its on time <3

this is for day 1’s prompt which is antsy!! make sure you check out the original post here, and make sure you show sleepy your love and support for putting this week together in the first place!!! thank you so much sleepy for working so hard to make this a thing, i am very excited to read what you and everyone else wrote, and for you to see what i have planned :D without further ado, let’s get into day 1!!

ler!sapnap, lee!dream, 1.3k words

enjoy!

“Dream?” Sapnap called out as he walked in the front door of their home, phone camera pointed at the floor.

“Yeah?” Dream’s voice called back to him distantly, a layer of nerves apparent in the word.

“Clay?” Sapnap called again, his tone more teasy and knowing as Dream stepped into the room, a wide smile and anxious expression on his face.

“Oh god…” He grumbled, fidgeting with his fingers and slowly stepping closer to Sapnap.

“He's here,” Sapnap confirmed Dream’s suspicions, making his smile grow wider as he groaned, throwing his hands over his face and bouncing on the balls of his feet. Sapnap chuckled at his reaction, smiling at his already flushed cheeks as he dropped his hands down by his sides and looked over at Sapnap with wide, anticipating eyes. “Are you excited?” He asked, adjusting the camera in his hands, still keeping it pointed at their shoes, not wanting to overwhelm Dream by shoving a camera in his face during such an intense moment, even though he was aware it was recording.

“I am… very nervous!” Dream said, voice high pitched and wavering, taking in a shaky breath and falling into nervous, fluttery laughter afterwards. Sapnap laughed fondly at his reaction again, his eyebrows furrowing at how excited and downright adorable his best friend was acting.

“Nervous and excited!” Sapnap supplied helpfully, reaching out to rub his palm over Dream’s forearm to comfort him, swinging his arm side to side to release some of the tension he held in his body. Dream laughed, light and breathy, the butterflies clearly bubbling up in his chest, showcased by his unsure voice and antsy movements, unable to stand still. He nodded at Sapnap’s words, tapping the toe of his shoe against the floor, then his heels, then hopping up and down a few times all together, his shoes squeaking against the floor with his anxieties.

“I’m nervous, but I’m excited, I’m– I’m doing… excited hops,” Dream explained, continuing his hopping in place, biting his lip to hold back his cheek-splitting smile. Between hops, he stayed on his toes, bouncing up and down on the balls of his feet, trying to loosen himself up and calm down his tense body. Sapnap cooed fondly at him, squeezing his arm where his hand still rested, unable to hold back the feeling of what could only be called cute aggression he was feeling for the other boy. How could Dream be this adorable? It was just unfair.

“You’re so fucking cute, Dream,” He said, unable to help himself, yanking Dream closer to him by his wrist and looping his arm around Dream’s waist. Dream squealed at his actions, letting Sapnap tuck himself into his side and rest his hand on his hip, breaking out into giggles.

“Shut up, you,” Dream replied, but he wrapped his arms around Sapnap’s shoulders, resting his cheek on Sapnap’s head. Despite everything, his body relaxed in Sapnap’s hold, the comforting hug being exactly what he needed at that time. He had never been more grateful to have someone like Sapnap in his life. He would be sure to tell him that once everything settled down more.

“I can’t! You just– you’re just like– I don’t know! You’re just being so cute, I hate you!” Sapnap expressed, tightening his arm around Dream and squeezing him tighter, giggling and looking up at Dream as he broke into soft giggles again. “Fuck, I just like– I wanna, like–“ Sapnap stammered, unable to find the right words to describe how he felt, instead deciding to progress with actions. Suddenly, he latched his hand onto the spot above Dream’s hip, squeezing the spot mercilessly and holding Dream close against him so he couldn’t push away. Dream gasped, his whole body tensing again, letting out a squeal as he flinched away from the feeling, but found himself going nowhere at all.

“AH– no! Nononono, noho!” Dream protested, pulling his arms back and pushing at Sapnap’s shoulders, leaning away from him to try and shove him off, but his arm was too firm around his waist. “Sapnahahap!”

“I can’t help it, you're just too adorable!”

“Stohohohop!” Dream shook his head at the feeling, loose curls falling over his face. Sapnap giggled at him, pushing his arm further around his waist, the tips of his fingers able to reach his lower tummy, scratching and wiggling just outside his belly button over his thin shirt, making him squeal. He tried to twist away, arching his back and sucking in his stomach as he pushed back into Sapnap, but Sapnap didn’t budge. Dream pushed at Sapnap’s arm, smacking his hand lightly as he tried to pry it off him, but his attempts were futile due to his weakened state, and all he could do was squirm in Sapnap’s arms as his little hops returned.

“Aw, where you goin’, cutie?” Sapnap pulled Dream closer, his side pressed into his chest now, and pressed the back of his other hand into Dream’s opposite hip to keep him in place, as much as he could without letting go of the phone he was still holding.

“Sahahap–! Thehehe– the vihideohoho!” He reminded, attempting to push the phone away instead, his laughter turning hiccupy when Sapnap pulled his hand back and turned Dream more, now able to grab onto his other side and squeeze above his hip there as well, keeping the phone out of his reach.

“Oh, I know, George is gonna love this,” Sapnap teased, pulling Dream backwards into him as he continued to tickle him to pieces.

“Nohohoho!” Dream protested, his legs growing shaky from having to lean due to the way Sapnap was holding him, and he stomped his foot on the ground to try to regain some stability. Sapnap decided to take pity on him, stopping the tickling and pushing forward to help Dream stand again, keeping his arm around his waist as Dream caught his breath.

“Okay, okay, I’m done. You were just being so cute I couldn’t help it. You understand,” He explained, going back to Dream’s side once he was stable again and hugging him properly, the way they’d started. Dream scoffed at his words, rolling his eyes, but he hugged Sapnap back tightly anyway. “Besides, you can’t say it didn’t loosen you up.”

“You’re so dumb,” Dream replied fondly, earning a soft hum of ‘mhmmm’ in return from Sapnap. He pressed a soft kiss to Sapnap’s head, and they stood in silence for a few moments, before Sapnap seemed to remember that he did, in fact, have a reason for coming inside, and they probably shouldn’t keep George waiting much longer.

“Alright,” Sapnap whispered as he pulled back from the hug, adjusting the sleeves of his hoodie and switching his phone to the opposite hand, making sure everything was still set up to continue recording for George. “C’mon, cutie, let’s go outside,” Sapnap said, reaching up and fixing a stray few pieces of hair that were out of place, slightly tousled from his movements.

“I need a minute! I need a minute, let– let me collect myself,” Dream said, his nerves coming back in full force, his eyes wide and unsure as he let out a soft breath to try and relax.

“That’s okay! Take your time! This is a big day. We’ll wait outside for you, as long as you need,” Sapnap reassured, rubbing up and down Dream’s arm as the other boy placed a hand on his stomach, seemingly trying to quell the butterflies that arose inside very quickly.

“Okay, okay…” Dream nodded, and Sapnap nodded as well, patting Dream’s arm before turning to walk towards the door. “Hey,” Dream said before Sapnap left, looking at him with a soft smile when he turned around. “Thank you. For everything,” He said quietly, and Sapnap smiled back at him just as fondly.

“Of course. I wouldn’t wanna do this with anyone else.” And with that, Sapnap made his way back through the front door and outside to wait with George, bringing the camera back up in front of him, ready to continue on with the beginning of the rest of their lives.

#ler!sapnap #lee!dream #cals writing #sleepy anon #sleepy’s ler!sapnap week #sleepy thank you again for your patience #i know your week kinda got ruined but i really appre you sticking through everything and letting me still add on even if im late to it #we really really appreciate you <3 and i hope you like this #i think it turned out really cute :(#i love dreamnap and i love meetup dteam so much #face reveal dream you are like a precious baby deer to me #just learning how to walk…..#i hope everyone enjoys this!!

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