#wcwnitro | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

welcometowcwmondaynitro · 6 years ago

Text

WCW Monday Nitro 19/08/1996

Tony Schiavone claims that Nitro is “red hot!” as we begin this week’s broadcast. Oddly unlike most weeks they don’t tell us where they are, although it’s safe to assume somewhere in the United States.

Usually a little bar appears along the bottom to tell us where we are, but nope, not tonight. Tony doesn’t mention it either. I looked it up and apparently they’re in Huntsville, Alabama. Why they chose not to advertise that is up to you, the reader, to decide. We get right into the action tonight, as VK Wallstreet saunters out...

He looks very pleased with himself. I’d be looking a lot less arrogant if I was wearing a suit with a stupid dollar sign emblazoned across the chest, but whatever. We’re told this is a return bout between Wallstreet and Jim Duggan. For fuck’s sake. Apparently these two fought at the Clash of the Champions last week. Who cares? And who thought a rematch was a good idea?

Here comes everybody’s favourite super patriotic dunce. By the way, Tony thinks this of all times is the time to say WCW brings fans the best wrestling action in the world. He follows this up by saying they will later bring us the Nasty Boys, as well as the American Males. It’s like he’s taking the piss. We do have Giant Vs Savage and Flair & Anderson Vs Sting & Luger, which is a little better I guess.

VK Wallstreet Vs “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan

Duggan gets a “USA” chant going early doors. Wallstreet is also American so this seems a bit redundant, but then pretty much everything Hacksaw does is redundant.

This match is, as you can imagine, total shit.

This pretty much sums it up. This match goes on for what feels like an eternity. Larry says that a three year old could outsmart Hacksaw. Doing a disservice to one and two year olds imo. Tony calls Duggan “a very intelligent wrestler”, which causes a confused Larry to ask if Tony is ribbing. Tony confirms he is not.

Not even joking, this chinlock takes up at least 50% of the match, and gets applied twice. I guess Duggan needs to catch his breath a lot. The guy is not exactly a cardiovascular marvel.

Match ends when Duggan tries to take out his trusty roll of tape from his tights. Nick Patrick makes him drop it, which causes Wallstreet to pick it up and wrap it around his fist. Patrick admonishes Wallstreet. As they are arguing, Hacksaw takes out another roll of tape from his tights (how much does he have packed down there?) and blasts Wallstreet.

This is a foreign object, so it’s a DQ right? Wrong. Patrick counts the pin and thankfully this one is over. If it was cool for Hacksaw to use the tape why was Patrick bothered about it in the first place?

“Hacksaw” Jim Duggan defeats VK Wallstreet via pinfall.

Here’s our good friend Gene-O, entering the ring to interview Duggan.

The WCW brain trust in full effect. Gene asks Hacksaw about the nWo. Did we not hear Duggan’s thoughts on this a couple of weeks ago? Why does Gene think his opinion has changed?

Hacksaw says that everyone in WCW has been screaming about what they’re going to do to Hulk Hogan.

Hacksaw is also drooling. That’s nice.

Duggan basically starts repeating the same promo from a couple of weeks ago. Before he can get very far into his monologue the crowd starts cheering.

The Macho Man is in the house and making his way down to the ring. Please knock Duggan out.

Macho says that he’s on “the same wavelength, same frequency” as Duggan, which is sad. Savage says he has a problem with Hogan, but Hogan is done “in this lifetime, the next lifetime, and the one after that”. I guess Macho is a buddhist?

Gene shows a replay of Hogan whacking Savage with a steel chair last week during his match with Flair. Savage says Hogan is his wake up call, and now he’s not “laying back” even a little bit. Gene asks Savage about the Giant, who he’s facing later on. Savage recalls the Giant saying he was going to take care of Hogan, but not getting the job done. He says that “the WC(sic) world title” has had “nWo” spraypainted on it, and Savage has 15,000 stitches in his head. Either Macho Man went to a terrible doctor or he’s exaggerating just a little bit. Savage says he’s going to solve his problem with the Giant tonight.

For some reason Hacksaw is applauding this. Not sure what his beef is with the Giant.

We get our first shot of Tony and Larry this evening. Tony is looking very respectable. Larry is wearing a ridiculous shirt underneath that suit jacket. What’s the point? The woman behind Tony in the glasses is super excited.

Tony suggests the the nWo have “awoken a sleeping Giant” after his performance at the Clash of the Champions against Chris Benoit. They show an awesome clip of the Giant dropkicking Benoit into the corner.

That is fucking impressive. Benoit collapses in the corner like he was just hit by a train, then eats a chokeslam.

A brutal squash.

Anyhow, onto the next match.

Still not convinced he’s a real Earl.

His opponent is Chris Benoit, accompanied by Woman and Liz.

WCW pans to the crowd.

She’s a stunt granny.

Earl Robert Eaton Vs Chris Benoit

I’m not really sure why Benoit was chosen to get squashed by the Giant at the Clash. I mean, it’s not like WCW didn’t have plenty of jobbers available who could have taken that spot. We’ve already seen two in VK Wallstreet and Earl Robert Eaton. I would say Hacksaw but Giant dropkicking Hacksaw to the mat may have caused a minor earthquake, so I guess that’s understandable.

Eaton’s trunks seem to have been inspired by Spiderman.

Benoit takes control by stomping on Eaton’s head. We see some brief mat wrestling before Benoit throws Eaton out of the ring and chucks him head first into the ring post before hip tossing him onto the outside mats.

As Eaton is crawling around on the outside, Woman runs over and punts him in the stomach.

They get back into the ring, and Benoit continues to dominate. Tony and Larry start talking about Fall Brawl and the War Games match, which Tony keeps referring to as “the match beyond” - I don’t remember that tagline, and it sounds kinda dumb.

Eaton gets back into the match by choking Benoit in the corner and then hitting a swinging neckbreaker. Tony and Larry are now referring to him as the “Earl of Eaton” which would only make sense if Eaton was an actual place, as opposed to his surname.

Eaton misses a leg drop from the top rope. Benoit then goes up top and connects with a flying headbutt.

This one is over.

Chris Benoit defeats “Earl” Robert Eaton via pinfall.

Benoit gives Eaton an extra stomp post match for good measure.

We see the same Glacier promo that’s been running for what feels like years at this point.

Footage is shown of the tag triangle match between the Steiners, Sting & Luger and Harlem Heat at the Clash. Scott hits the frankensteiner on Booker and has the pin on, but then Nick Patrick sees the Outsiders standing in the aisle and calls for the bell. Baffling decision considering they were nowhere near the ring and not interfering.

We then switch to Flair Vs Hogan, also at the Clash. Hogan is in the figure four but grabs the ref and chucks him into the turnbuckle. The Outsiders then show up and beat the shit out of Flair.

Gene-O is in the back with Sting & Luger.

Lex is giving the camera a somewhat disturbing look.

Luger says he and Sting have a surprise in store tonight. Luger asks Sting how many times they’ve faced the Horsemen, to which Sting replies “hundreds, maybe thousands”. Probably not thousands. Luger says this time “we’re going about it in a totally different wavelength”. Why not just say “way”?

Sting’s face says it all. Sting yells that he’s living life “with a totally different attitude”.

Why does Lex keep making these creepy faces?

Sting says life in WCW hasn’t been a cakewalk for anybody, and he can’t stand Ric or Arn. “And boy oh boy, do the Stinger and the Total Package have a surprise for you”.

They walk off, and Gene is annoyed he didn’t find out what the surprise was. Wouldn’t have been much of a surprise if they’d just blabbed it there and then, would it Gene?

Oh good, it’s Disco. Once in the ring he tries to do the Macarena and fails. What a dicksplash.

His opponent is Scott Norton.

Norton comes out looking pretty chilled. No need to be intense, it’s only Disco after all. This gon’ be a squash.

Uh... good effort? The speech bubble says “I stink, brother”, in case you didn’t understand what putting Hogan’s head on a skunk’s body entailed.

Disco Inferno Vs Scott Norton

As soon as Norton gets into the ring he slaps Disco in the chest. Disco sells it like Norton’s hand was a knife.

Norton misses a running splash into the corner on Disco, who then proceeds to whack Norton on the back a few times. It’s obvious this is having no effect on Norton, so Disco in his infinite wisdom turns around and starts dancing instead.

It ends about as well as you’d expect.

Disco just gets pummelled throughout this match. Norton no sells every punch and kick Disco attempts.

Norton hits Disco with his shoulder breaker finisher. Tony says “that’ll snap a scapula”. What the fuck is a scapula? To google. OK, it’s a medical term for shoulder blade. Why not just say that?

That’s his finisher so you’d think that would be that, but nope. Norton yells threats to Ice Train into the camera, then hits an armbreaker and locks in a single armbar for the submission win.

Scott Norton defeats Disco Inferno via submission.

“TRAIN, I’M IN YOUR FACE, SON”

Scary.

Next we go to an interview with Okerlund, Teddy Long and Ice Train.

Holla, holla, holla. Train is looking suave tonight, except for that massive bandage across his chest and arm. Shouldn’t that be under the shirt rather than over it?

Teddy reminds us that he was chokeslammed by the Giant, and thanks everyone for the cards and letters he received wishing him well. I’m sure they were flooding in. Long says Norton didn’t beat Ice Train at Hog Wild because the ref called the match due to Ice Train taking such a beating. Pretty sure that still counts as a loss, but OK.

They show Ice Train on a laptop, apparently talking to people on the WCW website, before getting attacked by Norton.

Firstly, I love those old school monitors. That’s some seriously thicc back. How bored would you have to be to stop watching the Clash to talk to Ice Train of all people though?

Can’t help but notice that laptop is turned off. Ice Train was apparently just staring at a black screen the entire time.

Ice Train starts talking but I have very little idea what he’s saying. Roughly translated something like “big coward comes out of the locker room, attacking me when I’m online talking to all the soul train fans out there, all my rock n roll trains”.

Teddy is as confused as me. Ice Train says that Norton can’t always attack Train when his back is turned, he’s got to “come, hook up, and look into my eyes”. Train takes off his shades for dramatic effect.

“Then, when you look into my eyes, you gon’ be face to face, brother, with the Train”. He says he won’t always be running around here looking like a mummy. Well, if you put your bandages on properly that would be a start.

They air an ad for Saturday Night and Tony totally fucks it up, calling Ric Flair “Ric Flower” and then stumbling over the 6:05 start time too. Whoops.

Next out is my main man.

Lord Steven, as usual looking like he’s just walked into a sewer.

That is not a happy camper.

Sadly no promo time for Lord Steven. His opponent is “Ice Man” Dean Malenko.

“Lord” Steven Regal Vs Dean “Stinko” Malenko

Dean’s sparkly little vest amuses me. Where do you buy something like that?

Mat wrestling to start things off.

Here’s a visual nobody asked for. Time to move to a different camera angle, maybe?

Regal does a cartwheel.

He’s just having a lot of fun. It’s actually a pretty good match between two very good wrestlers. Regal is obviously not in the best shape and a little slow, but he’s keeping up with Malenko nonetheless.

Regal is sweating pretty hard. Dat gut too. Malenko’s getting a whiff of that armpit. He is not having a good time.

More unsettling visuals. Poor Deano.

Second half of the match has basically been a bunch of rest holds. I think Regal is gassed. Sweat is literally pouring off his face.

Stinko manages to get himself back into the game and hits Lord Steven with an impressive german suplex.

He hits a second and holds on for a pin, but only gets a two.

Regal tries about a hundred different pin attempts before Stinko cradles him for the surprise win.

Dean Malenko defeats “Lord” Steven Regal via pinfall.

Larry: I always say a match is only three seconds away from being over.

Thanks for that pearl of wisdom, Larry.

We’re with Okerland again. This time he’s interviewing the Horsemen.

Arn refers to Sting saying that he didn’t like Ric or Arn, to which Arn replies he never needed anybody to like him as long as he had the Horsemen backing him up. He says he never needed to have a weapon in his back pocket to feel tough. Odd thing to say considering the Horsemen’s well established history of cheating, but okay. Arn says he has guts and Sting & Luger are in for a fight tonight.

Flair yells something indistinguishable about the Horsemen in his usual strange, high pitched voice. He says the Horsemen believe in “wine, women and song” and says tonight “the two pretty boys”, referring to Luger and Sting, will have to walk that aisle.

What a crazy guy.

Fireworks go off as hour number two begins.

They try to throw to Eric Bischoff, but Flair just keeps talking. He tells Hogan that if he’s watching tonight, that “between Babe Ruth, Michael Jordan and Hulk Hogan, the Nature Boy’s got more playing time than you got shower time”. I assume he’s talking about having sex with women, but it’s hard to say for sure.

So, we’ve just had explosions and hype. A big promo from the Horsemen. Hour number two is going to kick off in a huge way, right? We’re going to get...

Oh. The Nasty Boys. Great.Look at that shirt design. An epileptic nightmare.

Their opponents are Public Enemy.

Ugh.

Public Enemy set up their trusty table at ringside and then get into the ring. The crowd are waving their hands in the air like they just don’t care.

The Nasty Boys Vs Public Enemy

The match starts off as a total brawl, with all four men punching and kicking. Knobbs and Grunge end up fighting on the outside, whilst Sags and Rocco Rock compete inside the ring.

Most of the match is shown like this. I assume it’s a tornado tag as the ref has not tried to establish any form of control, and each team is swapping dance partners regularly.

At one point Johnny Grunge goes to hit the Cactus Jack elbow from the apron to the floor, but Knobbs rolls out of the way.

That’s gotta be a painful landing, particularly for a man of Grunge’s size.

You know the match is coming to a close when Grunge places Sags on the table.

In what I can only describe as insanely stupid, Rocco Rock then does a forward somersault onto Grunge...

Sags moves off the table, and Public Enemy go crashing through it.

Idiots. Rocco lands right on Grunge’s midriff. It looks really painful. Bischoff and Heenan laugh heartily. Heenan also notes that it’s pretty fucking embarrassing to be outsmarted by the Nasty Boys. Knobbs then covers Rocco Rock in the ring and this one is over. I still don’t understand why Rocco flipped himself onto Grunge. There must have been a better way to achieve what they wanted. It’s also funny to me that Rocco got pinned - I mean, he didn’t really take any damage from going through the table, it was literally all on Grunge. Oh well.

The Nasty Boys defeat Public Enemy via pinfall.

Guess who has come scurrying out again?

Of course, it’s Okerlund. I swear he’s interviewed literally 80% of the active roster tonight. So far we’ve had interviews with Duggan, Savage, Sting & Luger, Teddy Long & Ice Train, the Horsemen and now the Nasty Boys. Gene is working overtime. It’s basically the Mean Gene show at this point. “Mean Gene featuring WCW wrestling”.

Anyway, Gene asks the Nasty Boys about the nWo. This is the third time now. Sags starts off by saying “hey, NWL (?), backfiring nothing. Everybody that enters Nastyville is leaving Nastyville like those two saps just did - face down baby. Nasty as we wanna be, and that’s all we’re gonna be. NWO, WCW, we’re right here. We’re just nasty as we need to be when we wanna be”. Riveting stuff.

Gene says he wants to “confront” Knobbs publicly on television, then suggests that Knobbs - being a known friend of Hogan - is somehow in cahoots with the nWo. Knobbs calls Gene “shorty” in a disgustingly sick burn, then says Hogan can do whatever he wants and the Nasty’s will do whatever they want. Knobbs says they want the WCW tag team titles - and that’s that. So much for the big confrontation.

We get our first shot of Bischoff and Heenan sitting at the big boy desk. Bischoff claims WCW isn’t paranoid about the nWo. Bullshit. Heenan talks about WCW being ready to fight whilst the people behind him chant “weasel”.

We go to the standard WCW magazine commercial, featuring a kid saying the WCW magazine is “really cool” whilst morphing into Sting.

Obviously it just happens to be a magazine with Sting on the front cover. The kid then morphs back into himself, but now he’s dressed like Sting.

OK.

So we see more footage from Clash of the Champions. They’re pushing the highlights of this show pretty damn hard. Apparently Eddie Guerrero defeating DDP for the Battle Bowl ring. Why would Eddie or anybody else give a shit about that stupid ring? And even if he did, what does beating DDP in a singles match even prove? Battle Bowl is a tournament, so winning the ring in a random singles match means nothing. Idiocy.

Anyhow, after the match DDP goes to shake Guerrero’s hand, and like a white meat babyface idiot Guerrero accepts the handshake...

Only to get hit with a diamond cutter. Serves you right for being such a gullible chode. The sooner Eddie turns heel the better. What’s hilarious is that as DDP continues to beat up Eddie, putting him on the top turnbuckle for another diamond cutter, Chavo Guerrero Jr comes running out to “make the save”. Except DDP literally pushes him away like a child...

Then hits a really, really shitty looking diamond cutter off the top turnbucke on Eddie. Chavo couldn’t look like more of a bell-end here if he tried. Totally useless. That leads us into the next match, DDP Vs Chavo Guerrero Jr.

DDP Vs Chavo Guerrero Jr

Chavo starts out with a couple of dropkicks sending DDP outside, then dives out onto Page on the floor. Page somehow ends up getting Chavo into this position:

And just kicks the shit out of him. Kind of amusing.

DDP pretty much dominates the match, smacking Chavo around like a nobody. Chavo gets a couple of rollups but absolutely no real offense after his initial moves at the start of the match. Page hits Chavo with a brutal looking sit down powerbomb...

That gets an “ohhhh” from the crowd. The ref starts to count the pin but Page rolls out of the pin and gets back to his feet. After hitting a belly to belly and once again releasing the pin attempt, Bischoff yells for Page to be disqualified. For what? If he wants to release the pin then he’s within his rights to do so. Considering WCW can’t even stay consistent with the over the top rope DQ rule I’m not sure they really want to start adding other ridiculous reasons to DQ somebody. Anyhow, Page signals for the Diamond Cutter. Chavo however manages to reverse it into a pin attempt and gets the surprise three count.

Now DDP looks like the chode.

Chavo Guerrero Jr defeats DDP via pinfall.

DDP hits a Diamond Cutter on Chavo post match, then...

Starts removing Nick Patrick’s belt. Uhhh... OK, he’s just going to whip Chavo with it. I was starting to get worried as to where this was going.

After DDP whips Chavo a few times with the belt, Randy Anderson comes sprinting out to try and calm things down. Randy manages to grab the belt off Page and Page then leaves the ring. Anderson then asks Patrick why he didn’t try to stop DDP. In Patrick’s defence, what was he supposed to do? Bischoff is saying he wants to discuss Parick’s conduct with the Executive Commitee, but Heenan rightly points out that Patrick really couldn’t do much with Page going mental whipping Chavo. The only reason Randy Anderson was able to take the belt off Page was because he snuck up behind him.

You’ve got to be kidding me - Okerlund AGAIN? Might as well just get him a ringside seat at this point. Patrick says he was waiting for back up before trying to stop DDP. It’s really a fair point, and if WCW is trying to paint Patrick as in the wrong here it’s frankly ridiculous. Gene goes on to say that people are pointing fingers at Patrick over his supposedly questionable officiating, to which Patrick responds that the reason he’s getting so much grief is because Gene is being a shit stirring dickface. He doesn’t say it in quite those words but that’s essentially the implication. Hard to disagree. Parick does seem to have some delusions of grandeur, however, as he says “the media - the newspapers, the magazines” - Nick, there are no newspapers or magazines outside of the WCW magazine who give a shit about any of this. Hell, most of the fans don’t give a shit about it either. The only reason Okerlund cares is because he loves stirring the pot and causing trouble. Further proving that point, Okerlund brings up Patrick recently buying a nice home and snidely comments “I know the kind of dough you make, that’s pretty impressive”. What an asshole.

Our next upcoming match is the American Males Vs Harlem Heat for the tag team titles. They decide to throw back to September 1995 - nearly a year ago - to show the American Males beating Harlem Heat to win the WCW Tag Team titles.

The pair of them are dressed like male strippers, which always brings legitimacy to a set of titles. The held onto the titles for precisely 9 days before dropping them back to Harlem Heat on WCW Saturday Night, so, yeah. Barely worth bringing up. Bischoff doesn’t mention that part.

AMERICAN MALES, AMERICAN MALES, AMERICAN MALES....

At least they’ve lost the suspenders. They barely get half way down the aisle before their awful music is cut and Harlem Heat’s music plays.

For the record, Stevie Ray is back there somewhere. It isn’t Booker and Sister Sherri defending the titles. Booker starts yelling about the Nasty Boys, showing how much attention they’re paying to the American Males. Booker also yells that what the Nasty Boys did was “illegal”, and we all know how much Booker hates illegal tactics.

Oh, by the way, the announcers mention that Bagwell has recently been in a movie. It was “Day of the Warrior”...

OK. Which one is Bagwell?

American Males Vs Harlem Heat (w/Sister Sherri & Col. Rob Parker)

Nick Patrick is the official again, which is odd considering how supposedly controversial he is. If there was so much suspicion over him then surely by now he would have been suspended? Anyway, the match starts off with Stevie Ray beating the shit out of Scotty Riggs, before choking him against the ropes.

Booker tags in and Riggs briefly gets some offence before Booker puts the Heat back in control. We get the old trick of one tag team partner being distracting the ref, allowing the other tag team takes advantage. Heat just punch and kick the hell out of Riggs in the corner.

A proper old school beat down. Sherri is now distracting Patrick, although it’s for no obvious benefit as Stevie Ray is just wrestling Riggs normally in the ring, hitting him with a suplex.

Booker goes to jump off the top rope onto Riggs but gets caught mid air with a drop kick...

Ouch.

Riggs finally makes the hot tag to Bagwell, who comes in like a house on fire. He kicks Stevie Ray in the face and then drop kicks Booker T to the mat. Bagwell runs Stevie Ray into Booker T, and Stevie is such a big unit that the impact sends Booker flying over the top rope.

Bagwell goes for the pin on Stevie Ray but only gets a two, and Bagwell then gets thrown to the outside. Bischoff continues his vendetta against Nick Patrick by claiming it was a slow count, even though it clearly wasn’t. At this point they’re basically just bullying Patrick, which doesn’t exactly make him a heel.

Back in the ring Riggs hits Stevie Ray with a missile dropkick. Bagwell then climbs to the top rope to execute some kind of move on Stevie Ray, but Booker recovers and pushes Bagwell off the top rope...

Stevie Ray hits a powerslam and covers Bagwell for the win. Riggs tries to jump in literally two seconds after the pin has been counted.

Pointless.

Harlem Heat defeat American Males via pinfall.

The biggest shock post match is that Mean Gene isn’t around to try and stir the pot. We do get another Glacier promo though (the same one as usual) so that’s... something.

We come back from that promo package to the Horsemen theme music.

Flair and Anderson certainly clean up well. Oh, no, that’s Woman and Liz. The other two are way behind them. Heenan says “we are live, and I mean L-I-V-E, live!” - is there another way to spell it? I’m not sure that needed elaboration.

Out come Sting and Flexy Lexy. Time to learn what their surprise is. Neither of them look particularly enthused to be there.

Before the match starts, Sting grabs a mic. He says he wants all of the Horsemen out here, so Benoit and McMichael come out. We go to a break and...

Yeah, of course, it’s Okerlund. I should have known. He’s taken off his jacket though - probably worked up quite a sweat from running to and from the ring so often this evening. He looks like an insurance salesman. Also I’m pretty sure his trosuers are too long, but whatever. He hands the mic to Sting, asking if this is the surprise. Sting confirms it is.

Sting says “we can do what we always do, and beat each other up, or we can recognise that there’s a major problem right here in WCW”. Sting says he and Luger know they can never trust Flair and Anderson, and that’s a fact, but all their blood and sweat has been shed “whenever your career has taken you” right here in WCW. Erm, nope. Completely incorrect. Anyway, Sting says that Flair, Anderson, Luger and Sting “are WCW”. Sting says he is demanding that he and Luger take the two War Games slots beside Flair and Anderson. I assume that is instead of Benoit and Mongo. Not really a tough choice here, is it? Benoit is a great wrestler but losing Mongo isn’t going to hurt much.

Flair has a contemplative look on his face. I imagine he’s wondering why, if Sting admits he can’t trust the Horsemen, teaming with them would be any better than teaming with the nWo. Answers on a postcard.

Arm says he doesn’t like Sting and Luger, and they don’t have the same philosophy. Arn says Luger has “a heck of a body” and calls him “ripped”. OK, sure. Arn says Luger can’t bring “all these jiggling pecs, and all those shoulder muscles to War Games”. Not sure what he means by this. Luger will have to physically be there, so yes, the jiggly pecs and shoulder muscles will indeed be coming along for the ride. Arn says if Luger brings the power and dedication it took to build his body to War Games then that’s a different story. Luger replies that Arn can talk about “jiggling pecs and the body”, but he and Flair know that Luger and Sting have always given 100% when they’ve faced each other.

Arn says he knows what Luger is getting at and turns his attention to Sting. Arn asks if for one match Sting can “take that albatross” from around his neck - always caring about what the kids think, always trying to do the right thing - and discard it, because to win War Games you have to do something “so violent, and so painful, that [your opponent] looks into your eyes and says ‘I quit’”.

Sting is incredulous that Arn would even ask that question. He reiterates that WCW hasn’t been a cakewalk for any of them, but Sting says he has “lived the life of WCW”, whatever that means.

Finally Flair gets on the mic and says “let me get this straight, you and the Package want to team with me and the Enforcer?” - yes, Ric, that’s what this entire promo is about. Keep up. Flair says if Mongo and Benoit will step aside, they’ll agree to teaming up. Gene asks Benoit for his thoughts. Benoit says he’s waited his entire life to become a Horseman, and Ric and Arn have never betrayed him, so he’ll stand behind whatever decision they make. We then go to Mongo, who says he was a part of the best team to play in the NFL, and he knows how to sacrifice. Mongo says he’s willing to sacrifice if Ric and Arn deem it necessary, but that if Sting and Luger don’t hold up their end of the bargain “what the nWo do is going to seem like a day in the park”. Arn finishes the promo by saying “I guess everybody agrees, we have a deal”.

Honestly, this was a really good segment. Arn in particular was superb. Sting and Luger were a bit generic but that’s fine. Overall a very good job.

That said, could this not have all been agreed in private? Sting and Luger’s surprise was actually abandoning the match that had been advertised to the fans to instead have a chat with the Horsemen in the ring. Poor form.

Our latest nWo propaganda piece begins.

Nash says they’re in “Rome, Italy” as he and Hall do some silly poses. They’re actually in Denver, Colorado, but... whatever. Hall says it’s kind of funny to be in the ruins when they’re the hottest new thing happening. He’s still using his fake cuban accent at this point. They alternate between chatting about random shit and saying “I told you so” regarding winning the world title belt at Hog Wild. They mock the Giant and bury the Booty Man. Hall says that Luger reminds him of a movie star. Nash says Luger reminds him of Mr Ed. This is Mr Ed.

He’s a talking horse.

Nash says “what’s up with Sting?” and Hall says “nice hairdo Sting”. He does have a bit of a funky hairstyle going on at this point in time. They call Sting and Luger pathetic. “Don’t call us, we’ll call you” says Hall as the promo ends.

Back in the arena the Giant is coming out with Jimmy Hart.

We don’t get to see Macho Man’s entrance as...

He comes out behind the Giant and waffles him a couple of times with a steel chair. I suppose that’s one way to get an early advantage.

Macho slams the chair into Giant’s head a couple of times for good measure. He isn’t fucking around. The referee eventually takes the chair from Savage, at which point Giant kicks Savage in the stomach and basically no sells the half a dozen or so chair shots to the head that Savage delivered. Giant pushes Savage against the guard railings on the outside and starts hammering his forearm into Savage’s chest.

For some reason the fans behind Macho seem to be enjoying this a lot.

Giant tosses Savage into the ring and the ref starts calling for the bell, assumedly for a disqualification. The match never started though, so that doesn’t make sense. The bell does ring but it’s basically meaningless. Giant puts his hand around Macho’s neck for the chokeslam, but Savage kicks Giant in the stomach. For some reason Giant sells it like he was kicked in the balls, but unless his balls are somewhere near his belly button that is nonsense.

It’s amusing to see Giant waddling around the ring like this, though. Jimmy Hart comes into the ring with a chair, but Savage kicks Hart in the gut and tosses him back outside. Savage grabs the chair and is preparing to hit Giant with it, but out comes Hugh Morrus (humorous, get it?). He gets smacked with a chair for his troubles.

As does Ray Traylor.

Savage hits Giant with the chair again, then smacks the Barbarian and Meng in the head as they come running to the ring. Savage then realises he just hit MENG in the head with a chair and realises he done fucked up, so he does the only smart thing in that situation...

He sprints the fuck out of there. A wise move.

Giant, however, is raging, and so he literally leaps over the top rope in pursuit of Savage.

Paul Wight has ridiculously impressive agility at this point in time.

Giant sprints to the back and we’re back with Bischoff and Heenan.

Bischoff says the match never officially started. He gets word from the Executive Committee that it will be Flair, Anderson, Sting and Luger against the nWo at War Games. It would have been pretty funny if after all that the Executive Committee would have said “yeah, you guys did a pretty sweet promo out there, but nah, we’ll pass”. Bischoff is certain the nWo don’t have a fourth guy to round out their team, although I’m not sure why he’s so confident about this. He said the same shit about them not having a partner for Bash at the Beach and look what happened there. Those who don’t learn from history, Eric.

We end on that note...

#wcw #sting #luger #flair #anderson #wcwnitro #nwo

1 note · View note