#wasn’t expecting that at all

[pinkiemme]

I’m

What

Yeah

Good morning to me I guess

[tani-b-art]

A’ja Wilson | 24pts 7rebs 4ast 1stl

[cinewhore]

little neighbor update….

bought a white noise machine to cover the sound. So far it’s been working well with no issues.

I know that roughly around 11pm until 6 or 7am, I am likely to hear the sex noises so i make sure to crank that bitch up at 10pm and leave it on until 9am.

I’m getting into bed tonight and admittedly turned it on a bit late as I stayed up late so I couldn’t mask the sounds before it started. Not that it mattered because even at one of the highest settings, I could still hear homegirl singing her praises.

I’m mad.

I get up, throw on my head wrap and robe, write a very public fuck you shut up and marched downstairs to tape the note to her door.

As soon as I opened the door to my hallway and go down the stairs, i can hear this girl and at that point, I’m reasoning why can’t the entire building can’t BECAUSE SHES SO FUCKING LOUD.

Get to 204.

Y’all.

It’s not her.

I stop to listen at the door and am panicking because the floors creak and so you can definitely hear me stop randomly in the hallway.

It’s not her.

I quickly snatch the paper off her door and dash back to my apartment but i take the back way so I can roam through the entire building. Unfortunate for me, the couple stopped when i reached the second floor but it’s super clear the noise is coming from another unit 😳

All this time I’ve been secretly loathing this poor girl and she’s been telling the truth (except that one time when she was on the phone damn near all night but she’s been quiet since).

Now I’m trying to figure out how the hell im able to hear this other units bed so clearly?? What kind of shit is in these walls? Tbh, I don’t think moving into 301 is going to help, i think it’ll make things worse because I’ll be closer to the noise. At this point I think the better option is to just move entirely.

I honestly don’t feel bad for thinking it was the girl directly below me because I’m telling y’all, if you were here you’d definitely think the same thing. The only thing I am sorry about is hitting the floor with the broomstick cause i know she was like “wtf?”

Will remain silent about my findings but will continue to investigate because I’m paying $1200 to sleep and damnit i WILL SLEEP.

[maurypovichofficial2]

Ok who wants another boy update

[leolingo]

so we’re president-less . like FOR REAL

[tsurugis]

Like she only put it down once to eat over a period of like 5 hours lmao

[dclovesdanny]

Dcxdp

Biofam 4/5

Maddie didn’t speak to her father, as did her sister. Unfortunately, that made it hard for them to contact their favorite uncle, but when they left at eighteen, they both agreed it was for the best. Even after they found out the old man was dead, they didn’t reach out, unsure of what they would say.

That was then.

Now, with shaking hands covered in ectoplasm,(god her baby was hurt, she had been hurting her baby, THOSE BASTARDS IN WHITE HURT HER BABIES) she dialed the number that she had never managed to forget.

“Hello, who is this and how did you get this number?” The British accent soothed a part of her she hadn’t noticed was tense.

“Uncle Alfred.” Maddie could barely choke out his name, hands still shaking. “I need help.”

[remedy7411]

How do you snap a stick at the face off dot?!?

[pangur-and-grim]

I am probably going to do a sale, bring back some retired designs or something, because I dropped nearly 4K on Grim’s multi-day hospitalization and now I’m about to do the same for Pangur.

[james-p-sullivan]

[visionsofcarnality]

can we get headcanons for gilf!Joel maybe? his slicked back hair in tlou ep3 stirred something in me 🥵🥵🥵

i like the way you think…

Silver Fox ! Joel Miller Headcanons NSFW!!

Traditional old man in every sense of the word, he doesn’t make cheesy comments when you grab a door handle but he does give you a scolding little glare that totally doesn’t light a fire in your panties.

Self conscious about his somewhat saggy skin around his chest, middle, and extremities even after you’ve assured him until you’re blue in the face. You do help him though. Watching how attracted you are to his body even aged as it is definitely strokes his ego.

Has an online refillable prescription for Viagra that gets delivered to his apartment, and when he takes it he becomes an absolute fiend.

Usually without the Viagra he still is able to throughly satisfy you with ages of foreplay and a nice thorough fucking, leaving you both satisfied after one climactic round.

But when he takes Viagra-

You better clear your schedule and invest in a massage gun for your legs afterwards because you are going to be SORE.

I’m talking several positions, screaming until your throat hurts, your pussy feeling raw and used, daylong marathon sex.

Joel doesn’t seem to soften even a fraction until your body is wailing in protest and you can’t feel your thighs anymore.

You don’t think he could possibly have any more left in him until he’s once again emptying his heavy, full balls into your cunt; adding to the previous loads from the past six rounds he’s already shot into your body.

When he’s not fucking you stupid with the assistance of his little blue pills, he’s treating you like the princess you’d expect he would.

Don’t even think about carrying your own groceries, what are you, crazy?

Speaking of groceries…

If you aren’t living together yet best believe he’s on your doorstep every Sunday at 11AM with a truck full of groceries, dropping them off after church let’s out and he’s free to go to the store.

He makes you sit and continue sipping your coffee/tea while he puts them away, simultaneously checking the sell-by dates of everything in your fridge and pantry like a man obsessed.

Like a true old fashioned southern boy, he won’t tell you he’s in love with you. But he will point out the amount of things expired in your house.

“Come on, now. You’re gonna get sick, this is ridiculous-“ As if he hasn’t brought you your favorite brand of cereal and all your preferred snacks. Even all those “Shitty, organic, cardboard crap” things you love.

Never had a good plate of grits? He’s making them meticulously for you the morning after a hookup. “Eat, you need it. That stuff’ll keep you goin’ all day.”

Is all too supportive of your flimsy little sundresses. The gauzy fabric floating around your legs like a visualization of your perfume, nearly beckoning him closer. Even when you’re looking like a good little church girl in your soft, flowy dresses… all he can think about is how easy it would be to bend you over and have his way with you.

Which he does the second he brings you home from his cousin’s cookout in the suburbs.

Did I mention that he got a vasectomy after his divorce? Still, seeing you with his now adult daughter makes him daydream about getting you pregnant.

Which he finds insane… He doesn’t want any more kids, he physically can’t have any more kids… But the only thing he can think about right now is burying his cum in your pussy and keeping you pampered in his house with your belly full of his babies.

That vasectomy won’t stop him from trying his damndest, though. Especially after Sarah (who he had young) has her first baby and he watches you hold the six month old infant for the first time.

This man is a GENTLEMAN in the most old fashioned sense of the word.

Like, I cannot stress that enough.

If you’re an independent person, prepare to be thoroughly pampered.

His old fashioned chivalrous ways may be frustrating sometimes but it really does come from a place of just wanting to show his love.

Like when he insists on driving you everywhere whenever you go places together, or when he always finds a way to move you to the side of his body furthest away from the sidewalk when you walk, or when he automatically picks up your purse when you meet so that he can carry it for you.

But you forget all about those minor annoyances when he bends you over your kitchen table and pounds you into next week, muttering nonsense about how you’re too young for him or how you’re such a dirty girl for wanting him and his old man cock.

You moan his name when he grips both your hips in a tight but loving hold, all too willing to forgive him for his incessant door opening when you’re all dumbed down on his cock, the cock which is now way too hard and blood filled because he definitely popped one of your favorite blue pills a while ago.

But much like the gentleman he is, after he fucks you into a blissed-out stupor, he carries you to the bed and wipes your spent pussy clean, cuddling you into the mattress and running his hands through your hair while you both come down from your highs.

When he does get insecure about the age difference between you, all you can do is kiss his leathery, stubbled cheek and wrap your arms around him… Convincing him with your actions instead of words that his age is only a factor in your attraction to him… And that you love him for what makes him him.

this post got way too long but NONNIE I HOPE I DID YOU JUSTICE!!

[turtleblogatlast]

So I’ve been thinking about the boys combining their powers recently and I ended up really wondering about what would happen if a supercharged Mikey (time/dimensional powers) mixed his abilities with a supercharged Leo’s (space powers) and all I could think of was:

[yea-verity]

Link

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 317

IMAGINE THIS: Lil baby Damian, bored and being not quite old enough to start learning how to use proper weapons (curse these wooden ones, he wants true steel!) is wandering the base. This is not out of the ordinary, he’s the prince after all. What is out of the ordinary is that his shadow, his Akhi, is not here. 

Technically, he should be napping, but he woke up and neither his mother or his brother- who is quiet but gentle and isn’t a good speaker (mother said it was from a head injury)- is there. Which is how he finds his way to the Pit, which he’s not supposed to be at. Or at least not alone. 

But! His mother and Akhi are there! And- and Akhi is screaming and he’s never heard him scream like that, like he’s in agony- His eyes are green- they were blue, had, had Mother placed him in the Waters- 

And then the pool is bubbling- he should be running away, get assistance or something, he’s five, he shouldn’t be running towards it when everything is screaming to flee. But one moment he’s at the doorway, the next he’s clinging to his akhi as something writhes in the Pit, a mighty bellow echoing even as the Shadows take defensive positions. 

The water cascades, laps at their feet, splashes everywhere as a scaled form rises from the depths, wings like a bloodied sunset spreading as fur bursts into flames. Crimson eyes glare down at them all, pupils slits as they bare down at his Akhi. 

The creature- the dragon- dips its head down, its breath warm as it chuffs at his akhi, wings folding as though it is bowing. His akhi is clinging to Mother, shivering, several scars glowing as they fade and a burst of hair burned white. 

Oh. 

Oh.

@fairy-lights-and-blobs @f4nd0m-fun @hdgnj @radiance1 pspspspsps

[remxedmoon]

IT’S MY BIRTHDAY!!!! I’M OLD NOW!!!! so!!! as celebration i’m finally posting my isatsona!!! because a while back i saw someone bring up the idea of making sonas based on our roles in the fandom and i thought that was a fun idea teehees. he is like 2 inch tall and obsessed with a weird card game involving sacrifices. they’ve apparently Changed at some point but no one can tell what’s actually different about them. they keep a small bird in their apron at all times. do enjoy them.

also!! greyscale + alt without his glasses below!!

[danandfuckingjonlmao]

so five and lila being a thing is going right next to allison literally sexually assaulting luther in the box of things we are absolutely under no circumstances accepting as part of canon right