#was trying to buy tickets for a later train and realized in my distraction i got on the WRONG subway

[iknowofthestarsandsea]

having a no good very bad cringefail morning!!!!

[the-bau-quinjet]

You Belong With Me

Chapter 5 of In Breakable Heaven!! 

Summary: Penelope has a Halloween party!

Warnings: none 

Word Count: ~3100

You woke up slowly, not realizing you were on the couch with another human. As usual, you tried to roll over and go back to sleep, but instead of landing on the other side of your bed you land squarely on the floor between your couch and coffee table. Spencer shifted on the couch to look down at you as the two of you burst into laughter.

“Are you okay?” He struggled to get the words out through the laughter. 

“Yeah. Yeah I’m fine.” Finally managing to stand up, you grab the trash from the night before and throw it out. Spencer grabs the dishes from behind you and loads them into the dishwasher. You are about to offer Spencer some breakfast when he breaks the silence.

 “I should probably get going, but, uh, I can’t find my phone.” You can’t help but smile at the dejected look on his face.

 “It probably sunk into the couch, here” you hand him your phone “You can call it while I look under the cushions.” He takes your advice, dialing his phone and holding yours up to his ear.

 “It’s ringing.” You can hear it begin to vibrate as you remove cushions from the couch. “Got it!” You hold the phone up victoriously, answering the call. “Hello Doctor. What can I do for you?” You can’t help but tease him a little. He hangs up your phone, trading it for his. 

“Thank you. I really do have to go, but I’m really glad I got to see you again.” “Me too. I mean, I don’t have to go. I live here. I just meant I’m really happy I got to see you again too. And now you have my phone number, so we can talk more!” You force yourself to stop rambling before you say something even more embarrassing. 

He just grins at you, glad to not be the one rambling for once, and waves goodbye as he says “I’m looking forward to it.”

 --

 Around 4 PM a couple days later, you get a text from Spencer. You two had been texting pretty consistently since he left your apartment. But this text feels like a birthday gift from up above when you read the five simple words. Not that you would tell him today is your birthday. That would be weird to just randomly bring up.

 From Spencer: “Are you busy right now?”

 To Spencer: “Nope. I just got back from the bookstore.”

 It takes what feels like eternity for him to respond. Unbeknownst to you, he is pacing his apartment, working up the nerve to press send.

 From Spencer: “Do you want go see a movie? There’s a new Scream that just started in theaters and since Halloween is right around the corner, I thought it might be fun.”

 You can’t help but squeal a little when you read and reread the message.

 To Spencer: “I would love to! I love Halloween.”

 From Spencer: “Great, I can pick you up at 5?”

 To Spencer: “See you then”

 You instantly drop what you were working on to get ready. You have to pick out something to wear that says you’re interested but isn’t too much for going to see a movie. You decide on a pair of dark wash jeans, black combat boots, and a light sweater that ties in the back. It’s cute, comfy, and very fall. Just as you finish your mascara, you hear a knock on your door. You grab your purse and swing it open to find Spencer standing there in a black button up, dark jeans, a maroon cardigan, and of course, black converse. He looks incredible. You can feel the blush on your cheeks as he looks at you. “Ready to go?”

 “Yep, just let me grab my keys.” And with that, the two of you are walking back down to his car. You arrive to the theater 15 minutes before the movie, the perfect amount of time to get some snacks! You insist on buying the popcorn and sweet treats since he bought the tickets. You make your way into the theater and see it’s mostly empty except for a few people in the back. You find two seats in the middle and sit down. You’re honestly a little nervous because even though you love scary movies and haunted houses, you still get freaked out pretty easily. The scare is why you love it, but also why you’re nervous.

 “Are you okay?” Spencer’s question cuts off your train of thought. 

You decide to answer honestly “yeah, I love scary movies. I just… get scared… Wow that was stupid.” You can feel the blush creeping up again as you try to come up with a better way of describing it.

 “That’s not stupid at all. It’s really all because of adrenaline and other fear induced hormones. It is common for people to seek out adrenaline inducing situations because the brain itself won’t determine how much danger you are in. It only recognizes the fear and produces adrenaline to combat it.” You inadvertently cut him off when you hug him, muttering a quiet thank you. He’s too distracted by the scent of your perfume to continue on about adrenaline.  

 Ten minutes in and the movie hasn’t been that bad yet. You can’t tell if you’re disappointed or glad you aren’t screaming like crazy. Just as you let your guard down, there’s a jump scare that has you grabbing Spencer’s arm for safety. He laughs, seemingly unfazed by the cheap scare, and shifts so he is holding your hand. “Just squeeze my hand when you’re scared” he whispers in your ear. You feel the butterflies again as you nod at him. You squeeze his hand on and off throughout the rest of the movie, blushing when his thumb starts to rub circles on your hand.

 When the movie is over, the two of you decide to go across the street to a diner for some real dinner. You are right in the middle of eating breakfast for the third time that day when both your phones go off. Glancing down, you see a text from Penelope.

 From PG: “Y/N!! I am having an impromptu Halloween party and I do not want to hear it that you are too busy. Get your butt over here by 9!!”

 To PG: “You got it! Costume?”

 From PG: “Of course! I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

 You look up at Spencer “Penelope’s party?” You immediately try to think of a costume you can pull together from what you’ve got at home. It’s already October 27th, but you hadn’t planned a costume yet. 

“Yep, I guess I have to go find a costume.” Spencer replies, running his hands through his hair. 

“Same here. I have no idea what I’m going to wear.”

 “I can drop you back at your apartment if you want? So you can get ready.” You sigh, he is obviously right but you were hoping the night would last a little longer. 

“That would be great, thank you.” At least you know you’ll see him soon.

 Getting ready goes a lot easier than you anticipated. You pull together a young, country Taylor Swift costume with denim cutoff shorts, cowboy boots, a cowboy hat, a navy tank top, and a matching flannel. You decide to grab your acoustic guitar just to add to the look. It’ll work. You finish your makeup and leave in a hurry. Penelope is not one to be kept waiting.

 You get to Penelope’s apartment at 9:02. “What took so long? I thought you would be right over after I texted.” She scolded as she opened the door.

 “I wasn’t home, so I had to go home and throw together a costume” you laugh as she looks you up and down, doing a little twirl. She looks you in the eye before confirming your costume “Country Taylor Swift, not bad.”

 “Why thank you! Might I add you make an incredible vampire!” You say, lifting your hat off your head. Penelope just rolls her eyes and opens the door wider for you to come in. You immediately spot the rest of the team as other the other guests. Emily, Derek, JJ – who brought Will - Hotch, and Rossi. You didn’t know them all that well, but apparently you made a good impression since you were invited back. You aren’t sure if Spencer has told them anything about the two of you hanging out, so you decide not to say anything either. Instead, you admire everyone’s costumes.

 Emily is dressed as Black Widow in a tight all leather getup. Derek matches Penelope’s vampire costume, something you are sure she made him wear. JJ and Will make an adorable Mr. Incredible and Elastigirl. You are still trying to figure out Hotch and Rossi’s costumes when you hear them arguing. “I am very clearly a chef. Look at my hat.” Rossi says as he emphatically points to his head.

 “And I am from Men in Black.” Hotch declares. You are sure he is glaring from behind those sunglasses. They all turn and greet you when you get close enough.

 “Who are you dressed as?” Derek asks as he looks you up and down.

 “She’s clearly a young TS. The only thing missing is the signature curly blonde hair.” JJ looks shocked that Derek couldn’t put that together.

 “Ooh, since you’re dressed as a singer, you have to go first in karaoke. We can’t start until everyone is here though. Penelope’s rules.” Emily declares.

 “I guess I need a drink then!” You laugh as you head to the kitchen. You pour yourself a glass of white wine, not understanding how anyone can enjoy the vinegar like taste of the red, and walk back into the living room.

 You immediately spotted Spencer. He was wearing a loose white button up with puffy sleeves, a black vest, black jeans, and he had a red bandana tied around his head. Plus, he was carrying a prop sword. The converse didn’t really match, but you could still figure out the look. He was the dorkiest pirate you have ever seen and you loved it. Derek was giving him a hard time, but before you could do anything Emily was pulling you over to the karaoke machine.

 “It’s time to start karaoke!!” She was clearly a little tipsy, but you did not feel nearly drunk enough to sing in front of these people. You downed your wine, earning some whistles, and put the glass on the coffee table.

 “Emily! I have no idea what to sing.” You tried to protest.

 “Nonsense, you can sing a Taylor Swift song.” JJ chimed in “Something from an old album since your dressed country!”

 Emily immediately started a song before you could protest anymore and you were singing almost immediately.

 You’re on the phone with your girlfriend, she’s upset.

 ‘At least it’s an easy song to perform’ you thought to yourself, having done it what felt like a million times. But they don’t know that. Before you knew it, the girls were all singing the end of the song with you.

 Have you ever thought just maybe, you belong with me? You belong with me.

 You chanced a glance at Spencer as you finished the song. You refused to look at him before that, knowing he would make you too nervous. Before you had a chance to comprehend the look on his face, Derek inadvertently interrupted the moment “Y/N you’ve been holding out on us. That was great!” He said. The others joined in on the praise as you turned red. You managed to squeak out a “thanks” before retreating to fill your wine glass. Spencer met you in the kitchen.

 “That really was an amazing performance. You should consider switching careers.” You laughed at his comment, it was pretty comical considering your side hobby. “No really. You would be amazing.”

 You turned even redder with the compliment. “Thanks Doc, I appreciate the confidence boost.” You almost told him then and there, but ultimately you were being called back to the living room to hear Rossi sing Bon Jovi.

 The night continued much the same until Penelope broke off into the kitchen. You were going to follow her, but Rossi pulled you back into a conversation and you missed the chance. Soon enough she was returning with a huge birthday cake. At first, you were shocked. Then you realized she was the Penelope Garcia. Figuring out someone’s birthday is child’s play to her.

 Then you were shocked again, because everyone was singing to Spencer. Apparently it was after midnight and his birthday is October 28th.

 Once everyone has a piece of cake, you walk up to Spencer hitting him on the arm, “Why didn’t you tell me today is your birthday?” 

He deflects the question easily.  “Today only just started, so I really didn’t have time. Plus you haven’t told me when your birthday is.”

 You instantly freeze at that. You can’t possible tell him your birthday was yesterday. That would be so awkward. He immediately senses the tensions and asks “Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

You practically run out of the room calling “yep I’m fine, all good, 100% a-o-kay.”

 Spencer, confused by your quick exit, decided to look at your license to figure out your birthday. Maybe he could surprise you with something. Realization dawned on his features as he read the date, seeing that your birthday was yesterday.

 --

 You were relieved when Spencer didn’t chase after you to figure out exactly why you practically sprinted away from the conversation. You decided to just enjoy the rest of the party.

 Around 2 AM everyone was heading out. You hung back a little since Spencer hadn’t left yet, hoping you’d be able to walk out with him. God, you feel like a teenager again. Secretly crushing on a guy who clearly only likes you as a friend. Ugh.

 “Y/N!” You break out of your pitying thoughts to see Penelope and Spencer standing in front of you. Great. How long were you just staring at the ground? “You okay?” Penelope asks, looking at you with clear concern.

 “Yeah, I’m just tired. You threw quite the party!” You tried to joke to clear the air. “Thanks for inviting me, Pen.” You hugged her as you looked around for your purse, grabbing it off the chair. Spencer has been staring at you with a contemplative look on his face during the whole encounter.

 “I’ll see you soon, right?” You looked back as you opened the door. “Of course, my lovely!” Penelope smiled as you and Spencer left, him calling a quick goodbye as he walked out after you. You didn’t say anything until you noticed Spencer was walking towards your apartment with you.

 “What are you doing?” Ugh, real subtle. What kind of a question is that?

“Walking you home. It’s my birthday, you can’t say no.” You rolled your eyes at his playful tone, but there was something serious in his eyes. “Why didn’t you say your birthday was yesterday? We could have celebrated!” He seemed genuinely confused.

 “I don’t know. I guess I’ve never been the kind of person who does well with all that attention. My birthday was never a huge deal growing up, so I haven’t really made a big deal out of it now. Pen wanted a Halloween party, not a birthday party. I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it.” You couldn’t make eye contact with him. You’ve never really talked about these insecurities with anyone.

 “First of all, she clearly didn’t mind having a party for both because she had a birthday cake for me. I am completely sure that she would have decorated it for both of us had she known. Second, you deserve to have people make a big deal. You are an incredible person, Y/N. You are extraordinarily kind, selfless, and beautiful.” He pauses for a second before pulling something out of his bag. “I didn’t know your birthday was even in October, but I bought these a few days ago. I was going to give them to you after the movie, but then Garcia called and we split up. If you don’t like them I can take them back I just thought since you twist your earrings around so much, maybe they were bothering you and maybe a new pair would help. Penelope actually helped me pick them out, although she doesn’t know that. She just mentioned how she thought you would like them when we were at the farmer’s market.”

 Tears sprung to your eyes as you realized how much thought he must’ve put into this. You couldn’t help but throw yourself into a hug whispering “thank you, Spence. That is so thoughtful.” He rubbed your back until you stepped back from the hug. You opened the box to find a pair of dainty white gold earrings. One was a moon and the other a star. “They are beautiful.” You whispered into his ear as you pulled him in for another hug.

Stepping back again, the two of you made your way to your apartment. Upon arrival, you confessed, “I actually have something for you too. It’s upstairs though, so you have to come inside.” He smiled as you pulled him into your building.

 “I obviously didn’t know your birthday is today, but you told me about breaking your watch and when I saw this in the store window I thought of you and it just looked perfect.” You watched as he slowly opened the watch box, pulling out a simple brown leather band with a white watch face surrounded by a silver casing. It honestly screamed Dr. Spencer Reid. The watch face isn’t too modern and the leather band matches his satchel.

 “Y/N, it’s perfect. Thank you.” He closed the box, hugging you to say thank you. Looking into his eyes, you realized with 100% certainty you are falling for Dr. Spencer Reid. “Let’s go to sleep” is all you can say in response. You pull him into the bed and snuggle as close as you dare, too afraid to say anything else when you don’t know how he feels. The two of you drift into a restful sleep, not even bothering to change from your costumes.

 --

 You wake up due to the muffled voice of Spencer in the kitchen. You can smell the coffee, so you quickly change into some pajamas before walking out to join him. He glances at you apologetically while you pour the coffee into two mugs, adding equal amounts of sugar to both.

 As soon as he hangs up, he’s hugging you goodbye. “I’m so sorry, we have a case. We are supposed to be at the jet in 30 minutes.”

 “Don’t worry about it Doc. Go save the world.” You decide to listen to Superman on repeat for an hour while you clean.

tag list: 

@mac99martin​ @goldeng1rl8​ @eevee0722 @l0ve-0f-my-life @haylaansmi @dinonuggets15 @laurakirsten0502 @green-intervention @burnin-passion @takeyourleap-of-faith @secretpickleprofessordean @awkwardnesshabitat

[yourstarvic]

It was early in the morning. The Sun has barely risen over the horizon as you and Suna walked to the train station side by side. Suna looked at you in the corner go his eye, trying to see if you were all right, but base on the dark bags under your eyes, he knew something was wrong. Hearing the birds chirp awake, Suna gained his confidence to ask you a question, “Are-”

“Can’t believe you and Atsumu didn’t stop Miya,” you interrupted him with anger laced in your voice. You walked a bit faster, tugging up the strap of your bag higher up on your shoulder, “You were there with him and didn’t do anything.”

“In my defense,” Suna said, matching his speed with yours, “we didn’t know he was gonna do that.”

“Why would Miya do that?” You questioned to yourself out-loud, ranting your anger out, “Akito is a nice person! The nerve of him to punch someone! What is his deal?”

“Well um…” Suna was at a loss for words, not sure how to respond to you. So instead of saying anything, he just let you voice out your anger. Suna would occasionally hum in agreement with you and say, “Osamu really is terrible,” hoping this would save him from your wrath. 

“I was just so angry at him I barely got any sleep,” you cover your mouth with the yawn escaping you. "So I did some research on the other teams that are going to be at the training camp."

“Right,” Suna remembers a habit of yours, “you can’t sleep when you're angry. You tend to overthink events.”

With the need for sleep catching up on you, felt your eyes began to feel heavy and you started to sway a bit. Sensing your tiredness, Suna took your bag off your shoulder and started to carrying it for you. You whispered out thanks to him, giving him a small smile, but Suna just raised his hand to silence you. Walking upfront of you, Suna turned to face his back to you as he bends down and said, “Get on.”

Your face flushed with embarrassment as you realize what he was implying. You were about to protest, but Suna was first to speak, “Hurry up and get on. You’ll trip if you keep walking half-awake.”

“Fine,” you sighed out in defeat. Walking up behind him, you wrapped your arms around his neck as Suna hold onto your legs and boosted you up. You tighten your hold when you felt Suna stood up and started to walk.

“Relax,” Sun said, “I’m not gonna drop ya.”

Relaxing in his hold, you loosen up a bit, whispering out a thank you. Walking to the train station in silence, your eyes felt heavy with each step Suna took Soon later, your eyes were fulling close, consuming you into a deep sleep. 

Feeling your soft breath on his neck, Suna glanced at you in the corner of his eyes, “Good, she’s asleep.”

Smiling softly at how peaceful you looked, Suna continued to walk to the train station, not minding your weight on his back as you slept. 

“I swear, the things I do for you…”

“And I was like, you look so fine, how about we take this-is the (Y/n) on Suna’s back?” Atsumu stopped his conversation with Aran, Kita, and his brother. Pointing to Suna’s direction, everyone turned to face him, seeing, in fact, you were being carried on his back. They all had a confused stare, seeing you were asleep when Suna reached the group. 

“She barely slept last night,” Suna said plainly.

“She needs to take better care of herself,” Kita sighed in disappointment, slowly shaking his head.

Nudging his head to Osamu, Suna sighed, “Blame him. He’s the one that got her angry.”

“What did anger have to do with her not getting sleep?” Osamu said in disbelief.

“She tends to overthink when she’s angry,” Suna explained, “so she tried to distract herself by doing some research on some teams.”

“Still…” Osamu muttered, looking away as he crossed his arms.

“Why did you punch him?” Aran asked curiously.

“He just said something, that’s all,” Osamu muttered, refusing to look at them.

“Can’t believe you got it in you,” Atsumu smirked. “ since I always win our fights.”

“Whatcha say, you piece of trash?” Osamu gritted his teeth, glaring at his twin.

In a taunting manner, Atsumu stuck his tongue at him, “You know what I said, ya jerk.”

“Don’t fight,” Kita sternly told them, causing the twins to freeze in fear. 

Aran chuckled at them while Suna rolled his eyes. Feeling you slightly stir, Suna looked at you, hoping the commotion didn’t wake you up. When he felt you relax, Suna instantly let out a breath in relief and had a small smile as he looked at you. 

Quietly talking among themselves, Atsumu finished his story of meeting a girl at the ice rink. Through their conversation, more members of the volleyball team started to arrive. Everyone noticed your sleeping form and made sure to keep their voices low, not wanting to disturb your sleep. Until a certain someone started to arrive.

Yuna saw the group of Inarizaki members waiting outside the station. But what caught her eye was you, soundly asleep on Suna’s back with Osamu occasionally looking at you softly. Letting out a huff in annoyance, Yuna was quick to morph her face into a smile as she ran to Osamu yelling, “Honey bunny! I miss you!”

Her loud pitch voice, causing everyone to cringe and cringe even more when she jumped on Osamu, causing them to both falls to the hard ground. Osamu let out a painful grunt, trying to push Yuna away as she giggled and covered his face with kisses.

Hearing the commotion, you let out a tired groan, upset that you were a force to be awake. Hearing your waking, Suna looked at you and whispered, “You're awake…”

Not having the energy the say anything, you just nodded your head at him. Signaling him you want to be put down, Suna gently let go of you and made sure you were stable enough to stand. You linked one arm around Suna’s and leaned into him as you used another hand to rub your eyes awake. “What happened,” you pouted cutely at everyone, looking around to see the commotion.

Atsumu and many other members all blushed at your cuteness and has the same thought, “She’s so cute! Suna you are so lucky!”

Looking at the ground, you saw Yuna on top of Osamu, kissing his face. In the middle of Yuna’s kiss attack, you made eye contact with Osamu, which caused you to make a disgusting face at him. “I need coffee,” you said in disgust as you gave them a final look, tugging Suna’s arm towards the direction of a small convenience store that was nearby. 

“W-Wait!” Osamu called out, but you were already inside with Suna behind you. “Let go of me Yuna.”

“But honey bunny!” Yuna whined, giving him the puppy dog eyes. But Osamu just gave her a small glare, making her get off to him. 

Once she was off of him, Aran helped Osamu stand up from the ground. Once Osamu was fully standing, Yuna was quick to wrap her arm around his biceps and talked in a baby voice, “I’m sorry baby. How about I buy you some onigiri? Maybe a bento?”

“I already bought some,” Osamu said plainly, wondering why Yuna wasn't talking the hint he doesn’t want her clinging on him. Trying his best to ignore her, the group began their conversation before they were interrupted. A few minutes later, Osamu saw you and Suna arriving back from the store carrying a small plastic bag. Osamu saw how your face looked so blissful as you were taking sips from your coffee, enjoying the caffeinated contents. Osamu smiled as he saw your blissful state as you drank, but when he looked at Suna, his stomach churns seeing how he was looking at you, making him wonder what that look can be.

As the two of you reached the group, you looked around and saw a clock that read 6:43 am. “I need to do a roll call,” you said out loud to yourself. Tugging on Suna’s arms to gain his attention, you handed him your drink, which Suna happily hold for you. You went to your bag that Suna was carrying for you and got out a clipboard with everyone’s name. “Kita-San,” you called out to the captain, “can you get everyone's attention for me?”

Nodding his head at you, Kita called everyone to form a group around you. Once everyone was around you, you instructed out loud, “Okay everyone! When call your name, please say here!”

Once you were done calling everyone names, you thanked everyone for their corporation. Putting the clipboard back in your bag, you grabbed your drink from Suna and thanked him for holding it. “So….” Atsumu said, gaining everyone's attention, and pointed to you and Suna, “Have you two kissed yet?”

“Ummm,” you and Suna said, looking at each other with panicked eyes.

“Just how serious are you two?” You heard someone ask, “Because I can treat you so much better than Suna! He’s always so lazy…”

Almost everyone muttered an agreement and pointed out a few of Suna’s flaws. All of them saying you can have done a better job and you should be with them.

“Whatcha say?” Suna said, feeling an annoying tip mark appearing on his head.

“Well, me and my Honey bunny sugar plum kissed!” Yuna said with a triumph smile in your direction.

“Okay!” Atsumu said with wide eyes, turning his head slowly to face you and Suna, “Anyway! Answer the question.”

“W-We have kissed before…” you strutted, embarrassed with the attention. “Kinda?”

“Kinda?” Osamu said, trying to lead away from Yuna. “How do ya kinda kiss someone?”

“W-Well,” you stuttered out, trying to think of an excuse. But thankful the coaches arrived, saving you from finding an excuse. Letting out a sigh of relief, you elbowed Suna’s side harshly when everyone’s attention was away from you. “Thank’s for helping” you whispered sarcastically at him.

Smiling genuinely at you, Suna responded, “Anytime!”

“Is everyone here, (Y/n)?” Coach asks you, making you stop glaring at the black hair middle blocker.

“Yes, sir!” Yuna answered for you, “We did a roll call and everything! We are good to go!”

“Good job!” Coach Kurosu praised her, “I’ll know you’ll be a good addition to the team! But anyway the train will be leaving soon and I have all of ya tickets. So everyone lines up and get ya tickets! Once you do head inside the train and try to sit together.”

Did she try to get credit for my work? Or did she wanted to be praised?

Once you and Suna got your tickets, the both of you followed Kita, who was in front of you. Everyone else also followed Kita since he was leading the way. Finding an area where everyone could sit close. 

You took notice the train had a booth style seating. A table in the center and two chairs facing each other. Taking a seat, you sat by the widow with Suna seating next to you. Kita, Aran, Atsumu, and Hitoshi sat in the booth next to yours. 

Osamu slides in the seat in front of you, ignoring Yuna’s whining about seating near the window. “It’s just a seat,” Osamu said plainly, propping his chin on his hand as he looked out of the window.

You and Suna raised an eyebrow at the two, seeing there was trouble between the two. Seeing the two of you looking at her, Yuna quickly changed her tone and said, “I’ll let you have the window, sweet honey boo! Want to keep the best twin of the team happy!”

“Huh?” Atsumu said with an eyebrow twitch, not liking what he heard.

“It’s okay Atsumu,” Kita said, patting Atsumu’s shoulder, “please don’t cry.”

“I wasn’t going to,” Atsumu yelled.

Rolling your eyes at them, you took out your phone when you felt the train starting to move. You felt Suna leaned over to see what you were looking at, but you were quick to shield your phone, “What are you doing?”

“I can ask you the same thing,” Suna responded back. “Why are you looking up different muscles in the arm?”

Shrugging your shoulders, you answered blankly, “I don’t know.”

Rolling his eyes at you, he pulled out his laptop and proceeded to put on a movie and plug his headphones. Offering you one of the headphones, you thanked him but first cleaned them before you put them in your ear. With the movie starting, the two of you leaned back against the seat, not paying attention to the two people in front of you.

Osamu stared at you and Suna, trying to figure out why seeing you with him was bothering him. Could it be he wanted to spend time with Suna? He only misses his friend? Osamu continued to think of many different reasons until a thought appeared. 

Do I like her? No! I can’t be! There’s no way I like her.

Osamu looked at your calm, peaceful state. Seeing a soft smile appearing on your face, indicating something funny must have happened. Osamu didn’t notice a smile appeared on his face when he saw you smile. The way you brushed your hair out of your face and behind your ear, the small huff of air release from your nostril when you let out a small laugh. 

So what if she has a nice smile? And beautiful? Always so kind and gentle...Always think of others and hard working. And how she would bite her lip when she's nervous...

Osamu's smiles continued to grow slowly but, it then faltered when you laid your head against Suna’s shoulder for support. Looking up at Suna with a small smile and him looking down at you as well. 

Yuna eyed you and Suna with envy, wishing Osamu would act like that with her. But she then looked at Osamu, hoping to try to do something cute. Instead, she saw Osamu looking at you softly, as if you were the most amazing beautiful person he saw.

MASTPOST-PREV-NEXT

FUN FACTS:

Kita won’t tell anyone who he betted on

(Y/n) once saw Atsumu wear a maid outfit and hated how good it looked on him. 

Aran hates training camps because he barely gets any sleep. The twins won't stop whispering, laughing, pranking him, and fighting.

Atsumu tried to rebel against Kita. It didn't end well for him...

TAGLIST: @thelochtessmonster99​ @freaksnque​ @bloody-bella​ @tendo-sxtori​ @angels17324​ @madmelle​ @tiktikty-tokity-spagetti​ @girlyluke​ @helloalex80​ @fandomatakeover18​ @mus1caln0tes​

NOTES: hey guys! Thank y’all for supporting me and I’m so happy you all are enjoying the story!!

[woolieshubris]

Aquarium Date Fic !! Kagehina, but kag!asd. Kageyama pov. 2k words, oneshot. Tw : Sensory Overload! (it's present throughout the whole fic) Made partially for @spixi and partially so i could prove to myself that i can If there's a typo no there isnt <3 If you are an IRL this post doesn't exist <3

I typed out my message and pressed send, throwing my phone onto my bed.

Maybe I should go grab a snack or something... I think to myself, when I suddenly hear my phone buzzing against my pillow, and I dive to grab it. He replied to my message. That was fast.

Me : Hey we should go to the aquarium tomorrow.

Hinata : Okay :D sounds good 2 me!

Quickly, with my face quickly going beet red, I drop my phone and go to the kitchen to grab something to stuff my face with. I'm shaking, but as long as I walk quietly, I doubt my family will notice I'm even out of my room.

How should I reply? A thumbs up might be good, but it might be too cold. Any other reply is probably too much... Whatever. I'll go with the thumbs up.

I head back into my room and pick up my phone, typing a thumbs up emoji before covering my face again.

F/ck, I need to come up with something to wear, don't I..?

---

I arrive at the train station, feeling like I probably packed too much. I brought a backpack with an extra phone battery, 2 charging cables, (because Hinata has an apple phone,) and a bunch of snacks, as well as a water bottle.

Did I put on deodorant today??? I can't tell... If so, I'm probably already sweating through it. I start to feel sick to my stomach, but I don't have time to finish that thought when I spot Hinata walking in from a distance. He seems to be wearing basketball shorts and a t-shirt, and suddenly I feel overdressed in my jeans.

"Hey! Don't worry, I already bought my train ticket. You ready to go?" He asked while walking up to me. He didn't bring as much as a backpack, and I'm suddenly relieved that I brought so much.

"Yeah. It's coming in 2 minutes. I half expected you to be late." I stated, before realizing what I said. Sh/t! That was rude, wasn't it? I have to be nicer. Ugh. Hinata punctures my worries with a laugh.

"I'm not late that often, am I?" He states. This makes me feel a little worse about my comment.

"Hm. Just often enough." I state, carefully picking my words. I can't backtrack now, but I can try to redirect my speech to seem less biting.

"You only say I'm late because of last time!" He keeps laughing, keeping the mood light. I wish I could speak as easily as him.

"And possibly the time before that?" I reply. This is probably what he wants me to say.

"Shhhhh. What matters is I got here on time AND I have my ticket ready. Don't worry, I also brought enough for the aquarium ticket too!" He states, smiling. His smile is adorable, almost cute enough to distract me from what he just said.

"Oh, I was planning on paying for that." I reply without thinking.

"Ehh? Do you owe me or something? Should I be asking you for money?"

"No, no. I just thought...?" I'm really confused now. I was the one who asked HIM out, right? He knows how these things usually go, right? Maybe he just doesn't know...

"By the way, where are the others? I thought they would have arrived by now."

The... others? What others? The team??? This is a date, right? Wait...

I DIDN'T TELL HIM. I DIDN'T TELL HIM THAT THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A DATE. F/CK.

"I didn't invite them." I respond, my subconscious taking care of what my brain is trying to catch up to.

"You really find them that annoying? I know Tsukki and Yamaguchi can be a bit much sometimes but...?" Confusion flashes across Hinata's face.

"I just wanted to hang out with you. Is that a crime?" I answered before my brain could filter out that last comment. It would be useful in getting him to stop pushing, but it's far too rude for a date. Not that Hinata knows that last part anyway. I wish I could take my words back.

"You should be honored that I said yes in the first place." Hinata teases, my face turning red.

If only he knew what he said yes to.

---

Hinata and I managed to keep from fighting on the 30 minute train ride, which was a feat in and of itself.

I can't ruin this date.

"Hey, Kageyama? It looks like there is a student discount, and it also seems like there is a discount for groups. What do you think would be cheaper?" Hinata elbowed me, bringing me back into focus. I look up. He and I are both equally sh/t at math.

"Uh... Let's do the group discount? I'll pay for it. You can pay me back later." As if I'd let him do that. Hinata bought my excuse though.

"Okay! I can buy you lunch or something." He quickly walked up to the desk, and I followed him. "Can we have 2 tickets?"

Wait. Wasn't I supposed to buy them? If I was the one paying, aren't I supposed to ask? Is Hinata planning on paying???

"Oh, sorry, He'll be paying!" Hinata stated, gesturing towards me.

"Yes. Here's the cash." I quickly press down the bills that were almost getting damp from stress. I had already looked online at ticket prices, and made sure to set aside the perfect amount of money for two tickets in my pockets.

"Great! Let's head inside!" Hinata grabs the tickets, holding mine for me. We go up to the metal detector and I get my bag checked. Hinata, possibly because he has my ticket, or possibly out of kindness, waits for me.

"Can you hand me my ticket real quick?" I ask, throwing my bag back onto my shoulder.

"Sure, let's go in." We walk into the main lobby area, waiting to get our tickets checked. The aquarium is beautiful, and oh so huge. The high ceilings, and smell of saltwater, the giant whale sculpture that I can only assume is life size, and the concrete flooring, these things that on a glance are grand, start to give me a pit in my stomach.

"Kageyama! Come on!"

I look at the horizon line, and recenter myself. A quick yet deep breath and I'm ready to go. I walk up, and turn in my ticket in order to get a wristband.

"Kageyama?" Hinata states, causing me to look over at him. "Can you help me put this on? I can never do it by myself." He holds up the paper slip.

"Yeah, sure." I say without thinking. I wrap it around his wrist.

"Hey, make sure not to make it too tight. They are a pain to get off if you don't give them enough breathing room." I nod my head, and make sure to give him a gap.

"There you go." I let go of his arm, realizing just then how warm my hand is. I can feel my face getting warm too.

"Okay, let me do you now." He quickly fits the bracelet to my arm. "It's perfect! Let's go inside. I wanna see this penguin exhibit that I've been hearing so much about. I keep seeing ads for it and I've wanted to see it forever-"

Hinata kept talking. I don't think he ever stopped talking. It's nice though. It makes it easier to not focus on the huge building, or the shifting lighting, or the crowds, or the ambient music that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. Yup. I'm not focusing on any of that. Not. At. All.

My feet keep walking, despite my worrying. Hinata eventually slows, stopping before the largest piece of glass I've ever seen in my entire life. A giant tank filled with fish. The glass is taller than my house, longer than 3 busses, and blue and endless enough to make my heart stop in my chest.

F/ck.

Hinata turns around, and finds a bench to sit on, patting the seat next to him, while staring into the blue void. You feel like you have to bow down to its majesty. It is terrifyingly blue, terrifyingly enormous. I have never feared the ocean before, but I fear it in this very moment. A spotted whale shark swims past, paying no attention to the many people standing right against the glass.

"I could sit here forever." Hinata practically whispers. The giant tank orders your complete and utter silence. Even amongst a giant crowd, even with the littlest of children, everyone is quiet. The large speakers playing calming bass tones over the crowd of people, barely vibrating the floor.

"Hm. Me too." I reply. I could sit here forever, I feel like I already have sat here for infinity. Like its presence is something I could never escape. The pit in my stomach grows further. I break eye contact with the tank, reaching in my backpack. The zipper can barely be heard over the ambient noise of people shuffling. Was there always that sound? I bend down to look in my backpack. What was I going to get?

"Do you want a snack? I brought some granola bars." I state as I feel Hinata's eyes looking down at me.

"Actually, that sounds really good right now. I was just thinking about food." He states, bringing his head down to meet mine. I rustle around in my bag, and grab out a bar. It is barely bent. Passing it to him over my shoulder, he grabs it and unwraps it, sitting on the bench with his legs crossed.

"Sooo, what exhibit did you want to see?" He asks, taking a bite after.

"What do you mean?" I reply, choking down the pit in my stomach.

"Like... you invited me out here. So, what was it that you wanted to see?" He takes another bite.

"Uh. I just like fish, I guess." I look over at the tank, trying to avoid his gaze. I doubt he'll buy it, but it doesn't really matter.

"Me too! Let's go into the jellyfish room next? I can see the entrance to the penguins here and it looks packed. Explains why it's so much emptier here." He set his feet back on the ground and stood up, waiting for me to join him.

I leaned back down to zip up my bag, and we walked through a doorway into a smaller, darker room. Blacklights lit up the moon jellies as they calmly glided across the tank. Hinata seemed to drift off, but I didn't mind. It would probably be a good idea to be apart for a bit. I could calm down and collect myself quickly.

I walk up to the tiny seahorse exhibit, and look into the tank. I can't see them at all... I thought, when suddenly, I felt my forehead bump up against the glass.

How did I get close enough to bump up against it?

I go to look for a wall to lean up against. Leaning against something should help keep the pit down. I do a quick glance around the room. There are no walls. Only glass, and only fish. I hate fish.

Taking yet another deep and quick breath, I go back to meet up with Hinata. He was looking at a different kind of seahorse.

"Okay, I think I'm ready to go to the next section now." Hinata said, glancing away from the fish and over to the exit door. I nodded, and lightened up the scowl that was forming on my face. I didn't even notice it was happening until I felt my eyebrows aching from the effort. I just hope he didn’t notice.

The exit of the jellyfish room led to a balcony overlooking a lower floor. This must be the back of the aquarium. Below us there seemed to be a small cafe overlooking the sea.

"Here, let's go get some food! I can pay you back for the ticket that way." Hinata pulled my arm over to the down escalator. I step on right after him, and look down at the cafe.

It was very large, and honestly reminded me more of a cafeteria than a cafe, with lots of seating. After we reach the end of the escalator, he walked over to stand in line and stare at the menu. Looking for a good seat, I grab one right by the large window facing the water and set down my bag. I pull out the small amounts of snacks I've already brought to claim the seat and go over to Hinata.

"Hey, so I'm thinking about getting a sandwich. What do you want?" He stood, facing the menu.

"Honestly, just get me whatever you think I'd like." I state. I can't focus on the menu right now; I just don't have the energy to.

"Hmmm... Okay!" Hinata walks up to the register, while I go back to our seats. I'll probably regret that choice very soon, but I have backup food anyways, and I'm sure he'll eat whatever I don't, so it's not like the food will be wasted.

---

What the hell did he order??

I look at my plate, not quite understanding what the dish is even supposed to be.

"You said to get you whatever." He said with a smile, taking a bite of his sandwich right after.

"Whatever I might LIKE. What even is this?" I poked my dish with a spork, and it seemed to swallow it whole.

"No idea. I just pointed at the dish in the buffet." He shrugged. "I thought it might be funny, but it's less funny than I hoped. I expected more of a reaction." He looked up with the last sentence, making eye contact with me, which I broke a moment after.

"Sorry."

"Sorry? What are you saying sorry for? Since when did you say sorry anyways?" There was slight worry behind his voice, though it was hard to tell through his wide grin. To avoid answering, I quickly shove the food in my face. It's not great, but it's not really all that bad either. It's a little cold from sitting out.

"It's.... good." I say with a stuffed face. This causes him to start laughing again.

"You look super angry! That's the sort of reaction I was expecting." When did I even start scowling again? When I took a bite of the food, probably.

"You try it." I say, stealing a chip from his bag.

"I was the one who bought it anyway. I was half expecting you to make me eat it." Am I really that predictable? He took a bite, and made a variety of expressions, before settling on confusion.

"I wouldn't call it good. Maybe okay? It's definitely at least okay." He nodded to himself, taking a sip of water after.

"So, where to after this?" I ask.

---

We ended up on the train home while the sun was setting. It's almost to our stop. It felt so short, but we ended up hanging out for 5 hours. I almost forgot that I wanted it to be a date. I had to give up on that a while ago.

"Hey, we have to get off soon, get ready." I say, tapping his knee.

"Hm? Oh." He wakes up, blinking a few times and leaning forwards in his seat. He glances out the window.

The train stops, and we walk off onto the station platform.

"See you at practice tomorrow!" He says with a large smile, walking backwards towards the exit.

"See you." I reply, gripping the shoulder straps of my bag. I looked down

"I had a nice time on our date!" and with the last word, he turned around, running out of the station.

My head immediately turned upwards to where he was, as I feel my blood starting to rush to my face.

He... HE KNEW?!?

[eksperimentgaj]

Day 6 - Have you ever been to a competition? If yes, describe a little your experience, if not, what competition would you like to attend?

So far I’ve been to Wisła (SGP 2017, SCoC 2019), Kranj (SCoC 2018), Oslo (SCoC 2018, WC 2019), Planica (WC 2019, was supposed to be there in 2020 as well, but corona happened  🙃), Szczyrk (ladies’ SCoC 2019) and Lahti (WC 2020).

Wisła in 2017 was the competition I chose to go quite spontaneously. It was only after half a season I was into ski jumping, didn’t really know anyone in the fandom. I managed to convince my brother and friend (who is not really into sports) to go with me. I hope they had a good time 😀

In Wisła we’ve met few people (with whom I sadly have no contact, I’m not good at this 😟) to fangirl with. Got to sing national anthem twice, as team Poland and Dawid Kubacki won the team and individual comps 😀 One thing I remember very clearly from after the quails, when I lost my group and was trying to locate them, saw two girls taking a photo together next to me. After a moment I realized they were not two girls, it was a girl and Anders Fannemel 😅 Well, I judged from height only 🙃

I’m glad it was not too hot, considering it was July.

old phone, sorry for shit quality

Kranj 2018 was the first time I was flying a plane ever and also my first time traveling abroad alone. Already in Slovenia I met two girls from tumblr sj fandom. I got to see the town, which is very charming and the hill (obviously first journey destination, when I had some time alone). The comps itself made me fell in love with CoC, such a nice atmosphere, ski jumpers walking among the crowd and easily accessible. Oh, and I’m visible on a transmission from that comp 😂 Before going to Slovenia, I had to buy a new phone, as in Wisła the old one trolled me with its battery and turned off in the middle of a qualis, when I was taking photos 🙃 Funny thing was that in between the rounds there was a little archery contest for chosen fans from the crowd watching competition. And, considering it was CoC, there were quite a lot of people. You can really tell that Slovenians enjoy sj.

Also. Locate Domen’s car 😂

 Going to CoC in Oslo in September of 2018 was possible thanks to the fact we were already visiting family’s friend who lives in Norway (yes, I suggested the date, luckily it was also this weekend the plane tickets were cheaper). Only saw one comp, on Saturday. Sadly we missed girls jumping, as we needed like 3 hours to get to Oslo and it was simply too early (instead I followed text transmission while on a train to Oslo). When we arrived to Midtstuen station, obviously we took wrong route to the hill and somehow, through the woods, got to the smaller hills 😂 Anyway, we found the right hill quickly. The comp was not attracting almost any interest at all. Apart from my brother and me, ski jumpers and their families, there were barely a few people. Sometimes bikers would stop and watch for a moment but as the water break start, they would go. The barriers were prepared but not used at all, you could just walk wherever and nobody seemed to care. Nice. The café did not sell all the coffee and waffles they had prepared, so this lady was walking between  people and offering them for free 😀 I cannot eat waffles and my brother didn’t want any (why?) so we politely declined.

It was the first comp of Andreas Stjernen after an injury break, he did nice finishing third. And also gave me a weird look when I was shouting something in Polish to my brother, as he passed me by 😂 I got to see flower ceremony standing right next to Joakim Aune 🤩 And by a coincidence, during the second round we stood behind Marius Lindvik’s… family, I guess? Daniel was there too, not jumping himself but cheering on the ones who did.

WC in Oslo in 2019 I described earlier. I can add that on Saturday there was a snowfall since morning, I’ve almost froze my fingers off (stupidly sensitive hands). Also – seeing a bunch of Norwegians traveling at 9 am to watch cross-country skiing, leaving metro station and already getting drunk, dancing to party music being blasted out of the nearby windows – quite something.

photo from Sunday, with metro station mentioned

Planica 2019 was my very first time seeing ski flying live! Again with Slovenian crew. But because I’m an idiot who did not book place to stay at early enough, had to travel to Kranjska Gora every day from Kranj (like an hour and a half with a bus if I remember correctly) 🙃 Missed evening attractions of Kranjska that way 😅 But back to sj, got to see some really nice flights, personal best results, Ryoyu’s record of Letalnica (holy shit, the excitement that went through the crowd!), last jump of Robert Kranjec’s career (one of childhood faves ❤️),  team Poland’s first ski flying win, Žiga Jelar playing with his band and much more 😀 From personal experience I don’t recommend forgetting sunscreen to Planica. Ended up with sunburn in a shape of sunglasses and a beanie 🙃 And I was really surprised how hot it was in full sun on the stands. It truly turned from snowy winter on Thursday to full spring on Sunday. Felt like spending two seasons there in just four days 😀

 CoCs in Szczyrk and Wisła in 2019 were basically joint events, same week in two nearby towns. First day I went to girls’ event alone, on the next Julia @lewanarta​ joined me. And what sort of sj trip would that be without a fuck up by me? This time, apart from not having courage to approach Virág, who jumped in Szczyrk twice to fifth place (pleasure to see), I could not watch last jumps of second comp and flower ceremony because at the time I was throwing up in the toilet of a bar by the hill 🙃 Took wrong backpack in which I had no painkillers and got surprised by period 🙃🙃🙃 But until that, watching jumpers from the so called ‘river tribune’ was a very pleasant experience.

Also hill in Szczyrk is the very first I was to (and at), in 2005, before it was rebuild to its current state.

Having in memory SGP in Wisła two years earlier, the chill CoC comp without crowds was a nice change. Obviously, it’s Poland, there were still people, but not as many. First day was rainy… But only between rounds and after a comp. And as always, my job was following the comp with text transmission on my phone, while Julia was asking for autographs and taking photos 😀 I’m always trying to follow results during watching live, but it’s almost impossible with all these distractions 😅 And how nice it is to finish day spent on watching ski jumping live with watching ski jumping on tv – Courchevel was the same day 😀

 And finally WC Lahti 2020, the last thing before everything went nuts because of corona. Again with Julia, we’ve planned for a while to go to Finland. First sj related experience we had still in Warsaw – it turned out we’re on the same flight as team Poland. Later, at Helsinki airport, we’ve waited for a bag together with Norwegian xcs and noco teams as well 😀 we’ve been at the Lahti Ski Games since very morning as I wanted to see noco sj part, so we’ve had plenty of time to see the place, small hills, tracks, big hills… Surprisingly, there was no snow, apart from the artificial one produced for the events. Local people seemed a little bit sad because it’s usually naturally snowy around the time of Lahti Ski Games. It also turned out that we were to the 1000th individual comp in World Cup’s history. We’ve met Finnish Tumblr crew and I had an unexpected encounter as among them was a girl that I’ve briefly met in Wisła in 2017! World is a small place, isn’t it? And at the end we’ve had photo together with God of Wind himself. Last occasion, couldn’t let it pass. Oh, and I got a bouquet from flower ceremony 😀 No idea whose, it was given to me by Austrian staff member after team comp 😅

Uf. That was a long one. Congrats and thanks if you’ve read it all ❤️ I’m physically unable to write ‘a little’ 😅

[h-sleepingirl]

Scenes from a Hypnotic (Thirteenth) Date Feat. MrDream (with GleefulAbandon)

I am not even sure where to begin here. This writing is done while I am in trance. Keep that in mind.

I went to visit him for four days.

I am changed in ways that I can’t express. Writing feels fully futile. There are things I don’t share about our dates for various reasons. I have talked about this before. I do not want every writing to start the same way, but it is complex.

The frustration is nearly bringing me to tears.

But I thrive on discomfort and intensity.

We will see where this goes. He changed the way that I process memories sometimes.

(Writing that, realizing the casualness of it, made me cry.)

--

Thursday.

I love the sense that I know what I’m doing with the trains. I feel like an adult, I feel knowledgable and strong, even though I’m so scared of really stupid things -- will I trip over the gap between the train and the platform trying to get out, am I going to hold people up with my luggage. But I know where I’m going, I know how to get there, I know how to buy the tickets, and he is meeting me at the station.

I don’t trip over the gaps, and it is New York, so if I am holding people up, they just push past me. I arrive on time, and I haul myself up the stairs.

There he is.

That’s it.

I’m here.

Grand Central Station is a massive building, and it looks like a photograph, and I know I could get lost in the architecture for a long long time but he is distracting me, telling me facts about it, dazzling me with his knowledge as he always does.

It is two subway rides more and a short walk before we get to his place. I am exhausted; I didn’t get nearly enough sleep the night before. The whole day is a blur -- we get burgers for lunch in his neighborhood, we trance, we talk. Another of his partners is coming over later -- I play with her too, and we’re excited to see each other.

When she gets there, he cooks dinner for us -- stir fry with seitan, which I’ve never tried before and end up really liking -- and we chat a bit, and then it is like, well, we are all here, and we are all hot for each other, and we want to do stuff, so we should probably actually talk about it.

We have done very very little with all three of us together despite all permutations having some experience. I sort of feel like I can’t trust myself to be super toppy after he starts fucking with me, so we decide that I will do a little scene with her first, and then we can do something with the three of us.

She and I do our thing, and it is hot and connective and really really good, but that’s a story for another time.

Afterwards, the energy in the room is thick and heavy with a sort of anticipation and anxiety. We don’t know how this will go. All I know is that he is in control and that is the anchor that I will have.

He has me watch her go into trance, and it is like a palpable spell that has been cast; I can sense it like a physical force coming over her, tangible to me, drawing me in. His hands moving in front of her face so familiar to me, seeing it from another perspective, and the way her eyes flutter and roll as she’s taken by it…

I can’t help but start to fall.

He has her watch me, and I can feel her attention as this sort of unknown, featherlike touch and presence -- she’s seen it before, she loves watching, but I know it’s complicated to see someone who hypnotizes you go so deep into trance. A part of me stays there to try to feel it out, see what it’s like, so I am deep, but not fully gone.

I dissociate fully when we are both sitting there in trance, having this sense of watching us from outside of us, on edge, still unsure.

It is this ginger play back and forth, we are all testing the waters in this delicate way, little tricks here and there, so unlike what I know that we all do when we are alone. It is heating up and I wonder if I’m out of my element here -- not fully uncomfortable, fractionated, but not committed.

He pointedly looks at me and starts sucking on one of his fingers, and then, then my body responds -- I gasp at the easy metaphor, heat rushing through me and body starting to grind into the couch --

Then, popping it out of his mouth, he shows me his finger again, shining with spit, and pushes it between her lips. Her eyes roll back and her cheeks hollow automatically as her breathing picks up, and I just stare, transfixed by this girl who is thinking about sucking my cock, who is doing her very best to make me feel good while she is deeply hypnotized.

We are both so shaken when he pulls it out of her mouth. I can’t even look at either of them for very long. But we’re all breathing a little ragged and something has come over us.

He drops me deep into trance and I am even more easily sucked into it, feeling like I want to escape into his control. He pulls my shirt up to expose my tits while my limp body can’t resist, and starts idly tweaking my nipples. My body responds immediately, weak to his touch, weak to the sparks of heat through my body, weak and losing intelligence, becoming more animalistic...

“So much easier to just be a dumb cow, isn’t it?” he says.

“Mmm…” I moan. “Mmmmooo…”

“That’s right.”

And I fall deeply into it, losing my brain, immersing myself fully in the sensation of being milked, all tits and grinding hips and inhuman noises.

Through the thin, rolled up line of my vision, I can dimly make the two of them out, how his attention is shifting from me to her, and her, oh her, shaking almost violently, staring, so wide-eyed.

“That's the hottest thing I've ever seen in my life,” she says, quietly, in total disbelief, the voice of a broken person. I don’t fully comprehend it, but I also don’t fully NOT comprehend it.

I just want attention. My tits just want attention. It’s all I can think about. I want -- I want --

He snaps and wakes me up, and I’m faced with the two of them, and I can’t hide anymore, I can’t hide the way I look, how fucked up I am. None of us can hide. We are just here.

She is grinding and shivering, still open-mouthed. He is dark-eyed. I am trying to cover my face as he turns to me.

“I have to ask,” he says, seriously, but it is wild, almost bent out of shape. I know what he’s asking intuitively, I start nodding; yes, let her, I want it... “Is it OK if she --” I nod more vigorously. Her mouth, her fingers, I want them; she is a total open-mouthed wreck from watching me like that, I want her to be brainlessly milking me; my tits are greedy for it.

“OK,” he says, and he starts playing with my nipples again and my brain slips back, easy, hungry.

I am so so fucking turned on, and I don’t know if he’s guiding her hands or not but she touches me, tentatively, and her fingers feel so good, I must push my tits forward, encouraging -- yes, do that, keep going, such simple thoughts, just wanting to chase the pleasure.

I lose time, easy as that, all moaning and mooing and wet thoughts until he snaps us both out of it. I look at her immediately.

She looks so horny.

We try to settle down, processing what just happened, checking in with all of us -- are we OK, fuck, that was hot, validating.

“It’s not how I imagined that to go,” I say. “Her touching my tits, I mean. I feel like we just jumped into another timeline.”

“You knew what I was going to say before I said it,” he says to me.

“Of course I did. I wanted it. Although…”

They both look at me. I think about saying what I want to say, and decide to go for it.

“I was thinking, she does have a mouth...”

She gasps, and he stops breathing and moving for a moment as they both stare at me.

--

It is a line, a boundary crossed, a step into another world. Her mouth is hot and slick and I can’t even focus enough to feel exactly what her tongue is doing besides giving me throbbing, hot pleasure, overwhelming me. I am struck totally brainless by it as I sink and slip further into it and there is this sense of her totally mindlessly sucking my tits, sucking me mindless, sucking her mindless, all the while he controls both of us, we are like dolls he is playing with, and it is so much, it is so much.

I feel trapped and I don’t care. We could be doing this for a long long time.

--

Friday.

My nipples are so unbelievably sensitive again, the way that they get with him, careful manipulation of my tits bringing me to the edge of cumming, over and over. I am completely helpless to the pleasure, just as I was the night before, losing all sense of everything, all motivation the moment he touches.

It’s a horrible thing to feel like you’d give up who you are just to have your nipples played with, but I just can’t care.

Pressed against him, flipping over desperately so that I can grind on top of him, fully clothed, like we are teenagers as he squeezes and tweaks at my tits. All the while he is murmuring about me turning into a fairy, a honey-brained, perfect little sex pet, sensitive and mind obfuscated by the haze of eroticism.

He slides a finger into my mouth and it shuts me off as I just keep shuddering against him.

“All your holes filled,” he whispers. “Your mouth, your pussy, your ass…” And it is just immediately so true and real as he keeps pinching and rolling my nipples with his free hand. Completely overstimulated, having a jolt of a thought -- oh my god, oh my god I actually might cum --

“Fairy orgasms are different than normal orgasms,” he says urgently, as though he knows. “They are the blossoming of flowers, the feeling of thunder. They hurt.”

I whimper through my nose, sliding my lips up and down his finger as I feel whatever otherworldly cock inside me start to hit just the right spot, oh my god --

“If you cum like this, you lose your brain,” he warns, and that threat just pushes me closer, the risk so sweet...

“It gets replaced with a magic spell that takes you over and controls you forever, no more brain, just magic replacing all that electricity, never the same --”

I feel magic crackle through my fairy head, all through my body desperately trying to fuck itself like it was made for it, closer, closer, closer as he keeps talking until I fucking cum, losing everything, feeling myself taken over by his supernatural control, shaking, wringing the last of it out of me until I collapse on top of him, brainless.

--

We don’t do hypnotic orgasms. We don’t really even do physical orgasms except when I get desperate and masturbate sometimes.

It is a big, big first for us.

He puts my brain back in my head but he tells me that the spell is still there, trapping it, encasing it. I can’t function without it. It’s a part of me, now.

I look around the room, where I sat almost a year ago with fairy eyes, New York magic, seeing the streets and colors differently and vividly. I remember how deeply I wanted to keep those eyes forever, a need for something persistent.

Now there is permanent fairy magic in my brain, subtle and sparkling.

“Fairy brains process memories differently,” he tells me, and it’s just as simple as that. “They’re thrown into them, completely immersed, almost reliving them entirely…”

I relive cumming on top of him.

I also start to relive other things.

--

I can’t really look at him without trancing out. He represents the very concept of hypnosis to me. There are so many times where I will look at him and just feel it so immediately, just the tiniest shift from him, or no shift at all, just being around him is the hypnotic anchor for me.

He always notices.

I tend to feel guilty about it.

“I’m sorry,” I say when it happens once, and that’s all it takes for him to get a glint in his eye and go and elaborately make that a part of me -- worrying, guilty, embarrassed, emotionally masochistic about it but still helpless to it.

--

Saturday.

So many moments where we are entwined with each other on the couch, he is running his hands over my shoulders and I am gingerly touching his chest.

He will trance me, and I will be gone, and then he will wake me up and I will be shaken by it. Over and over.

I am so worked up. I am shaking and shifting helplessly, needing to touch him, needing him to see how fucked up he makes me. It is not just sexuality. It is something else, something more base and breaking. I need to be close. Closer.

“Please,” I say, desperately.

“‘Please,’” he repeats. “What are you begging for?”

“I don’t know,” I say, thinly, frustrated. “Control. More. Please… I don’t know…”

“You want to be more controlled, but you don't know how to be more controlled,” he says, darkly, and I know this voice and tone, the problem solving, the focus, his favorite thing. The gears turning.

It spins us into a place where I lose more, give more, let him take, beg him to take.

And he does. He takes.

We make it to the bed and I am completely broken down to a shell of myself, nonverbal and totally raw, totally fucked up.

He solves the problem.

I am more controlled. Permanently.

Gasping, mouth an ‘O’, looking at him totally incredulously -- how could he do this, how could he make me feel this good, how could he take away so much?

“You can thank me,” he breathes with a grin, and it is totally malevolent; I am the damsel captured, I am the defeated prize.

“Thank you,” I whisper fervently, over and over and over.

--

I had told him a few days before that so much of my sexuality revolves around not wanting to be a person -- being an object, being otherworldly is where I am whole and true.

“You don’t want to be a person unless you can be brainwashed,” he murmurs to me.

“Yes,” I whisper desperately, reeling.

“You know that feeling you get when I say just the right thing? You know how your brain has that moment when I’ve really fucked you up?”

“Yes, yes, yes…” I can’t express anything else.

“It’s almost like an orgasm, right?” His hands, smoothing down my sides as I writhe. “An orgasm in your head that wipes out everything except how good it is? How much that can connect to your body, feeling it throughout all of you when I say that thing that just gets you, moments where you are totally fucked up?”

As he talks I feel it take over me, my magic spell brain completely overwhelming me at his whim, cumming inside my head to be so thoroughly manipulated, knowing that this is what I will feel now, forever, whenever he says the smallest thing, body spasming from the darkness that I need so deeply, perfectly fucked by his control and his words.

--

I will never forget this night. I will never forget the feeling of complete bliss to lay there with him, in the dim, colored lights, feeling exactly where I want to be, content and happy in a way that feels better than any drug, anything I’ve ever felt; so enamored, so controlled. I am totally sober but I am totally altered.

The exact sense of it fades over time, but the images, the fleeting thoughts, and the fractured memories are burned into me.

I am changed. Something has changed. True change. The kind of change I maybe still didn’t believe was possible to force on a person. Proven fucking wrong.

“I have never seen you like this,” he says, comfortable, a little awed.

I nod with a small smile and nestle my head into his chest.

--

Sunday.

Another lazy morning. Our third lazy morning.

We are so lucky.

I feel just as changed as I did the night before. It’s persistent.

He tells me that I’ll probably have moments when I go back home where I’ll find myself brainwashed doing day to day things, in the shower, putting on my makeup, just going through automatically, controlled.

“And you can take a little selfie afterwards,” he says, “like capturing that moment of being brainwashed and showing it.”

I can imagine it vividly and feel it spilling into my life in a way that I’ve been craving and needing and didn’t know how to express.

“You are the most brainwashed you’ve ever been,” he says, looking at me seriously. “Like, you’re at a peak. Obviously you’re going to get more brainwashed, this isn’t an end, but it’s such a high point. Every trance is a reminder of the control I have over you. You’re not doing it anymore. I’m doing it to you.”

It is the most beautiful truth, and he hypnotizes me to prove it.

--

“Cover me, so I don't look like a tourist,” I say, wanting to take a picture of the gorgeous ceiling in the station.

“Everyone here is a tourist,” he says.

He’s right -- I see the diversity all around us, so many others with their phones out, taking photos, looking for directions.

We make our way downstairs so I can grab a bite before I get on the train, sit in the little tables so I can eat a little bit.

I still can’t look at him without trancing as we sit across from each other.

He always knows.

(I remember asking, “How do you always know?” And his response, lengthy and detailed about how I look when I’m in trance, all the different permutations, how it would be impossible for him to not see the smallest detail, how it’s so incredibly clear to him, how could he not see it…)

Fuzzing out right there in Grand Central. Just like I did on the subway. Just like I did at his house. Hours of it. Hours and hours of this trance with him, for days.

“You can have all these kinds of responses really inconspicuously,” he says, low, just for me. “It's all about control. Control, and knowing. And it just gets better and better and better and better…”

My cunt gets hotter and hotter and hotter as he talks, wondering if I would build up to something. But the moment is quickly over -- we’re on a schedule.

As we walk down the platform to my train, I see a couple hugging and giving their goodbyes and I realize that this is what we look like -- we are just one couple of many who had meetings with their loved ones, who are all saying goodbye.

“Alright,” he says, walking me on, carrying my bag for me. “I’m not gonna stick around too much. Travel safe.”

“You too,” I say.

We embrace, and I feel him one last time before I watch him leave.

--

I am very used to being in trance, especially now. I am used to this sort of “up” trance that we’ve explored over the last year or so. It does not feel up but I don’t know how else to say it. He said to me recently, when I was in trance for probably eight hours just going about my day, “You will get more used to being in trance; you are brainwashed.” What a thing to say. What a reality to live.

It is weird to write this in trance because it doesn’t feel as flowery and I just want to keep telling you about how he controls me. I wish I could tell you. I wish I could express it. This feels incomplete. Even a total exact transcription would be incomplete.

In trance, I don’t have the same ability or energy to spend on the writing capabilities that I feel like I normally have. I can’t connect things the same way. Things connect but it is different and I can’t tell if I’m saying them correctly.

I’m sorry I can’t give you more. I’m sorry I can’t tell you more. If you only knew. If you only knew.

But sometimes it is the simplest statements which have the most truth behind them.

I am brainwashed.

I am changed.

He controls me.

I can’t explain it any further than that. You just have to take my word for it.

--

@hypnokinkwithmrdream

[edyacouky]

Journey to the Past (4/10)

Honnestly writting this chapter was so awful ! I'm still not proud of it ... Hope that you will like it nevertheless Have a nice day everyone ! :D

Can be read on AO3

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                                                       ~*~

Once Jay could stand on his feet again, the little group goes find the guy Roy knows. Easily, once they prove they can pay him, the guy produces them one visa each.

They immediately go to the train station hoping have the next train for Star City. There is one on the platform. They jump on the train, after buying their ticket, with such on hurry that the inspectors didn’t try to stop them.

They collapse when they found where to sit with relief sigh. Only Lian isn’t breathless because Roy carries her to run, it doesn’t stop her to imitate the others.

“I didn’t think we could have made it. Jay admits

-It would have been a shame. Roy answer. There is only one train to Star City per week.

-How long it will take to arrive to Star City? Jay asks

-It should take twelve hours if there is no trouble. But there is always trouble with train. We should probably arrive at Star City in twenty-four hours.”

Colin and Damian look daggers at each other.

The travel would be long if they don’t start to support each other.

                                                            ~*~

Jay and Roy try to make Colin and Damian talk about why they argue later, but neither of them wanted to talk. After a few minutes and some promise to try get along, Jay and Roy change the subject of the conversation.

“Do you want to discuss about what happen earlier? Roy asks to Jason

-That’s nothing.

-Doesn’t look like that.

-I’m used to it. That’s just headache. Nothing life threatening.” Jay reassures Roy with a smile.

Jeez, Roy has found an accomplice really cute.

“Don’t hesitate to tell us if you feel bad, ok?

-Ok.”

They decide then to keep the kids entertaining and keep Jay’s lessons to be the Perfect Lost Prince; until they decide have some sleep.

Roy is wake up by Lian.

“What’s happen, Pumpkins? Roy asks with a yawn

-I need to go.

-To go? Oh! Yeah sure.”

Roy wakes up Jay who almost uses his dagger before he recognizes him.

“Just tell you that Lian and I go to the bathroom.

-Ok. I will take care of Colin. Don’t worry.

-Thanks. Come on Pumpkins.”

Jay can’t believe that he was asleep so well. He isn’t sure if Roy didn’t wake up; he would have realized that he was gone. He must have been more drained by his headache that he thought. That’s too dangerous. He glances at Damian to be sure that he still here safe and sound.

He caresses tenderly Damian’s hair, trying to calm himself. His plan is based so much on luck; there is so many things that could go wrong.

Damian groans and blinks rapidly.

“Shh, my Prince. Jay whispers putting his hand on Damian’s eyes. Everything is fine.”

A shadow appears in the hallway coming toward them quietly.

                                                     ~*~

Roy and Lian get out of the bathroom to come back to their seats, when Roy heard an inspector behind him.

“Stupid idea to do the control at this hour.” Roy thinks when he remembers they have one last station to go before leave the country so maybe not so stupid but still pretty bothering.

Then his blood freezes.

The color on their visa isn’t the same as the visa of the other passengers.

What the hell they had paid this guy for if he didn’t make convincing visa?

If Roy meets this guy again he will kill him.

“Hurry up, Pumpkins. We have to get back to our seat, now.”

Lian is confused by sudden Roy’s worry and she obeys without complaining. She is not awake enough to wanted ask question about what’s going on.

                                                     ~*~

When Jay hears the floor creaks, he thinks at first that it must be Roy and Lian, but it’s seems too quiet to be them.

He pushes as smoothly as he can Damian so he can stand up.

“What’s going on? Damian grunts

-Wakes up Colin and prepares to run.” Jay murmurs

Jay approaches the door but before he can open it, someone else did it for him.

“We have to leave; Roy said immediately, our visas are not good.

-What?

-The color isn’t good. We have to hide on the baggage car.”

After feeling relieved that he was worried about nothing, Jay panics that they wouldn’t success avoid all the inspectors.

They are almost on the baggage car when Jay say green reflect on a glass.

He tries to stick his dagger on the intruder’s body once he sees the Al Ghul’s color. But his opponent success to block him. In less than one second, Jay’s dagger is on the floor, his arms are blocked on his back and one hand is groping his genital clearly without his consent.

“It’s a pleasure to see you again, Jay.” Barsad murmurs in his ear

Jay could have thrown up. Barsad is clearly one of the reason he is more than happy Talia refuses anyone to court him.

Barsad is twenty years old older than Jay and is one of Ra’s Al Ghul’s men that he met less than one year after Talia take him in.

This asshole assumes that he could do whatever he wants with him, demanding that he was his, without considering Jay’s age or consent.

“Let him go. Roy orders aiming one arrow at Barsad’s head after making sure the kids is behind him

-That’s cute. Barsad mocks before biting hard Jay’s neck hiding his head behind Jay’s

-Stop that instantly!” Damian yells ready to fight too

Using this distraction, Jay success drag oneself out, pushing Barsad and when he tries to grab Jay again Roy shoot him in his shoulder.

“Run!”

Jay take back his dagger before follow them.

Despite his injury, Barsad seems determined to catch them.

More than once, they almost get caught when changing of car.

“You’re mine.” Barsad keeps whispering

At a moment he succeeds catch Colin by the hair menacing to make him fall off the train. Before any of the adult could react, Damian stabs him and takes Colin’s hand to push him in their direction.

Then Jay pushes Barsad, making him fall off the train.

With a little hope he is dead on the river. But Jay doesn’t believe it.

                                                  ~*~

Once they are sure no one seems come to them, Roy puts the kids to sleep and take care of Jay’s injury.

They still didn’t say anything to each other. Jay doesn’t what lie he should say to make sure Roy keep help them despite proving that they are a hazard for his children.

He was so sure he was ready to protect Damian, but now he isn’t anymore. Maybe Princess Talia was wrong to trust him. If only she was here to help them.

Without helping himself, Jay starts to cry as quietly as he can with the kids next to them. He doesn’t want to worry his Prince.

“You lie to me, about the reason you are on the road.” Roy simply says

Jay knows that it’s the moment for him to lie but he doesn’t seem able to talk.

“The clothes of this guy seemed pretty expensive. I suppose he is rich.”

Again, Jay’s tongue is unable to move.

“And he wants to marry you. And your parents are ok with that.

-I truly don’t want to talk about that.”

The only though of being bonded to someone as awful as Barsad make him sick.

“Look, knowing him he must still be alive and he and my … father will come after Dami and me soon. I understand that you prefer renounce to our … plan. That’s ok. You will find another way.

-Jay, it’s out of question. We will stick together.

-No …

-Hey, it’s not like we have something to lose. You see how we live.

-But your children …

-I know.”

Roy has a pause where he looks at Colin and Lian.

“I swear I would do anything to protect them, but, it’s not fair to let you down. We’re team, ok?”

Jay can’t believe how stupidly kind this man can be.

“I will make sure you won’t regret it.”

                                                    ~*~

They don’t know how they succeed to arrive at Star City without any more problems, but they thank their lucky star.

Roy being still known by Dinah’s domestics despite their opinion on him or Lian, they let them enter. Their coats are barely take off that Dinah arrives.

“Oh my Gods! Roy, you all look so miserable! She exclaims visibly unhappy about that. Go take a bath, then we will have lunch.

-Dinah, I’m here to talk to you about something. Roy tries to explain

-I’m sure that can wait until we eat. I’m going inform that there are guests.”

And like that she disappears after having kissing tenderly all her unexpected guest, even the two she never meet before. Without another word could be say, they find themselves cleaned, on new clothes, more relaxed.

“How can she have men clothes? Jay asks perplexed

-Oh … Well, she has some friends that can stay here.”

Roy is so prepare to have to defend Dinah that he is a little shocked when Jay accepts his explanation without a frown.

“That’s pretty generous to her to let us borrow.

-Oh knowing her, we will leave with it?

-Can we do that?”

Roy simply shrugs, like to say “why not?”.

                                                     ~*~

During lunch, the presentations are finally done. Despite what Roy was expected, she seems more interested by Damian than to Jay.

“I have to admit that it’s not a simply courtesy visit. I have something to announce you. Roy finally get to say when the children leave the table

-Oh, Roy. Don’t worry, you have my blessing. Dinah says taking Roy’s hand before looking at Jay. It does seem that he makes you happy and that’s the only thing that’s matter.

-What? No! No, that’s not what I want to talk about. Roy explains babbling while Jay blushes furiously. I have brought Jay here to you because he is the Lost Prince and I was hoping you could help us to be introduced on the Wayne’s family.

-He is now? Dinah asks suspicious letting Roy’s hand go. Bruce has suffered enough. It’s out of question that I help anyone take advantage of him.

-Dinah … Roy want to defend themselves but the way she looks at him stop any word to come out his mouth

-I am. Jay said. I am Jason Todd the Lost Prince. We have no bad intention by telling that. We won’t use your help to abuse the Royal Family. I promise you if you help us all you will do is permitted a father to get back his son.”

Not really a lie, with Damian being Bruce’s son. Jay hopes it’s enough to be credible.

“Roy, please leave us alone.”

Roy looks uncertain but Jay reassures him with a smile.

“You must understand that I may have further question.

-Shoot.”

                                                       ~*~

Roy tries to distract himself by playing with the kids. He is pleasantly surprised when he realize that Colin and Damian seem being friend now. Look, like have his life safe by “this spoil brat”, help Colin being kinder to his judgment and Damian does more effort to be patient and nicer.

But no matter what, he can’t help to worry. Hours pass and neither Jay nor Dinah leave the room. The rest of their journey depends of this conversation and he doesn’t even have a little idea how things are going.

“Jay is smart. Damian says. You shouldn’t worry this much.”

One hour before dinner, finally, Jay and Dinah come join them.

Jay immediately let himself drop on the closest chair. He looks pale and sweating.

“Are you alright? Roy worries

-Just headaches. That’s fine.”

Roy then looks at Dinah who seems fighting with herself while she looks at the kids playing.

“So? What do you say?

-I will help you. She finally says. I will give you a letter to give to Duchess Katherine Kane, I’m sure that she will present you to Bruce.

-Thank you! Roy exclaim kissing her cheek with gratitude. You won’t regret it.

-I hope so.”

                                                        ~*~

Despite what Roy and Jay have planned, they don’t continue their journey the next morning.

Dinah doesn’t want them to leave without they have clothes that will make them well received by the Court.

She also wants to booking for the boat and spends a letter to Kate so she knows they come visit her before they are at her door.

She takes the kids with her without anything Jay or Damian can say to change her mind. She lets enough money to Roy telling him to have fun.

Roy tries to change her mind before they go, talking alone with her in her office.

“We can’t let you the kids.

-Of course you can! It would be my pleasure. She says before whispering. Plus, I’m sure you could use some time alone with the Lost Prince.

-I don’t understand what you mean.

-Please, like you don’t like him.

-That’s not …

-I think he likes you too. It will be such a good alliance if you take the chance. Despite your choice you’re still Ollie’s heir after all. She says with malice in her eyes

-He doesn’t know that.

-Really? So he likes you for what you are. That’s fabulous.”

Knowing a lost cause when he sees one, Roy gives up.

It’s more complicated for him to stop blushing though.

                                                 ~*~

During their shopping, Jay doesn’t mean do be disagreeable to Roy, quite the contrary, but his mind wandering toward Damian.

They’re so close to their purpose yet so far.

And the discussion with Dinah perturbed him.

All the questions she asks. Some answers were provided by Roy, but some it was given to him by a flash.

The worst was the question about how he lost Bruce Wayne this famous day.

A flash of scream, blood’s odor, fear and a laugh that haunted him until now, make him babble about a secret door on a wall. It was so stupid, that he wasn’t surprised then she doesn’t want him to elaborate, and just look at him with her eyes wide.

These headaches were worst that what he admits to Roy. In fact, Dinah have to stop multiple times for letting Jay’s pain calm down.

Maybe he will find the essential oil that helps him in one of the shop. He really needs it.

Suddenly Jay recognizes two men on the street. They are Ra’s men.

Taking advantage that they didn’t have saw them yet; Jay pushes Roy on a dark alley. He puts himself against a wall where he could see the men, his hands on Roy’s shoulder force the redhead man to hide him.

Roy doesn’t understand what is going on. One minute they were walking in silence, Roy searching desperately what he can say. The next second, his body is really too close to Jay’s. It was so sudden that Roy had to put his hands on each side of Jay’s head.

“I think he likes you too.” Dinah’s voice booms in his head

Jay looks uncertain, almost shy with his eyes lost beyond Roy.

Did … Did Jay do the first step? Does he want their relationship to change?

Does Roy want their relationship to change? Should he do the next step? Should he kiss Jay? Like that, here?

Jay starts to breathe again when the two men disappear without saw them. He suddenly feels stupid for react that way without explain anything to Roy. He must think he is crazy.

When he finally look back at Roy, feared what kind of expression he may see, he doesn’t have time to see his face before lips meet his.

Before Roy kiss him.

Roy is kissing him.

Jay doesn’t understand how it could be possible. Of course, they become close and Roy keeps telling that Jay and Damian are part of the group as much as Lian and Colin. Of course, Jay may have a stupid crush on Roy.

Jay admires Roy to put the kids before him, to be gentle, brave and funny. Jay isn’t ashamed in his own head that he also admires Roy’s strong arms, his tender green eyes, and his messy red hair.

Without control himself, Jay reciprocates the kiss, forgetting for a moment his dangerous situation. Maybe it is for that Talia always refuses he was courted, because she knows it will make him stupid.

Thinking of his Princess makes his blood freezes and he stops the kiss.

“Did I do something wrong? Roy asks worried by his brusqueness

-It’s just …”

How Jay can explain everything going inside his head?

“There were my father’s men here.

-What? Roy says looking around but they weren’t here anymore. So you didn’t bring us here to …

-No.

-But to hide from them.

-Yes.

-Oh fuck! Sorry! I’m so sorry. I should never have assumed it was what you wanted. Roy apologies taking a step back but Jay’s hands are still firmly on his shoulder

- No. It was fine. It’s just … it’s my first kiss. He admits blushing furiously.

-Oh. Shit! Really? How he can be?”

Roy can’t believe that. Jay is too beautiful. He must have caught more than once someone’s attention. And anyone who starts to know can only fall for his stubbornness, his love for his younger brother, and his intelligence.

And there is this Barsad. He doesn’t look like the kind of guy that understands what no mean. Well maybe Jay doesn’t count the kiss that could have been imposing to him and Roy can agree with this reasoning.

“It’s my first because my … my mother always refused that I was courted. Jay says first which is true, but then he adds to not admit his previous lie. She didn’t agree with my … father about that. And now she is …”

Roy can understand that. Jay is so young yet. Only nineteen years old. He doesn’t think he will authorize anyone court his children before they are fifty years old.

But there is something else in the way, Jay talk about his mother.

“You miss her. Roy guess

-Terribly.”

Jay feels so lost; he never needed as much her guidance as now and she may be dead.

Jay appreciates when Roy hugs him. Not only the physical contact soothes his pain, but he permits him to hide his expression that must be awful.

“Do you think she would have loved me?” Roy asks jokingly even if the answer is stupidly important for him

Talia hated Barsad and the other men like him. But Jay also remembers one of his teachers.

An old man with a single eye. A prestigious combatant who promise bring honor and money to the Al Ghul family, if Talia accept to give him Jay.

Jay never understands why Slade Winston seemed so interested by him. Nor why Talia refuses such an offer.

Then Jay tries to imagine how Talia would have seen Roy.

A stranger, a nobody with two bastard children at his charge who can offer nothing to the Al Ghul family.

“Not at all.”

Jay sighs.

“I can’t do this. I appreciate you a lot Roy. But with all that happen right now. Dami, my father, the Lost Prince … I can’t do it without her approval … That’s stupid I know but …

-Hey, you have no excuse to give to me. If it’s no, it’s no. I appreciate you enough as a friend. That’s enough for me.”

Roy lies. Not the part no is no, but that’s friendship is enough to him. Now that he knows that Jay have some feeling for him, it will be more complicated to make sure his mind doesn’t wandering to much about “what if”.

They stop hugging and agree that they should come back to Dinah’s house and doesn’t talk anymore about what just happen.

                                                     ~*~

Dinah is nice enough to say them good by at the port.

“I can’t thank you enough.” Roy assures feeling guilty for playing with Dinah’s emotion

But it’s too late to back off now. Their children need money and their scam is a way like any other, he keeps telling himself.

“Just be safe, ok?”

Roy promises.

Little did they know that the men, Jay saw earlier are on the same boat as them.

One of them pays the telegrapher so he could use his machine. He informs the King Al Ghul that he found the target on boat and demands what the next order is.

“This night it will come to you. Wait for it next to a lifeboat. You will be extract tomorrow morning.”

If the man doesn’t understand how he could be possible, he doesn’t ask anything more. He leaves the room, give it back to the telegrapher, and while all the passengers go meet their dream, he wait next to a lifeboat with his accomplice.

                                                     ~*~

Roy is ashamed of himself with how wildly his heart beat when Jay lies next to him in the bed.

All the kids wanted sleep in the same bed to keep talking, and the adults were too happy that they start to get along that they say yes without thinking.

They would have say even if they have realized how embarrassed they would be. They would not have answer just as quickly as they did.

Since none of them is tired, they lying down face to face to discuss but they can’t find any word to say.

Roy feels fluttered in his stomach by being this close to Jay.

Jay doesn’t even dare look him in the eyes. His curly hairs are the cutest mess Roy ever sees. He really wants to run a hand through his hair. His cheeks are bright red; his skin must be so warm. If only he could kiss them again. Nervously, Jay licks his lips then he bites it. The things he wishes to do to them, the things he will do to prove he is worthy to do.

Roy’s gaze runs though Jay’s body. His aching neck shows the bite that this bastard of Barsad left and Roy can’t help but think is a perfect place to let his own biting mark above it in plain sight. His chest unfortunately hides with the wide tee-shirt Jay wore. He can’t prevent but ask to himself how his nipples must look like.

The rest of Jay’s body is hidden by the sheet but Roy remembers very well his thighs. Roy wouldn’t mind dying between them.

When he looks up, he wishes to die right now.

Jay is redder that it could be possible, and his eyes are straight in Roy’s.

And he knows, he can only know, what exactly Roy has in mind.

“I’m sorry. Roy whispers standing up. I will sleep on the floor.

-Don’t be stupid.” Jay tells forcing him to lay down

Jay feels how hard Roy’s heart beat with his hand on his chest. It reassured him that he isn’t the only one in the state.

“I’m sorry.

-That’s ok.

-No, I …”

Roy looks where the kids talk, not wanting they hear them, and comes closer to Jay.

“I understand that you say no to me and I accept that. I’m sorry I make you uncomfortable.

-You didn’t make me uncomfortable. I’m very …flattered.”

That’s Jay’s turn to look at Roy’s lips.

It would have been easier to resist if Roy’s feelings were one sided and not prevent by a ghost he never meet.

“I wish your mother would have approved me. He confess

-Me too.”

Roy is ready to take a risk and kiss Jay. Maybe this time Jay will not fear to shame a dead parent and only take in consideration what he wants.

But Jay suddenly turns back.

The moment has passed.

Roy turns back too.

                                                      ~*~

“Kitten.”

Jay groans, opening with difficulties his eyes. He feels so appeased. Even if he trust this voice, he would mind sleep a little more.

“Kitten, come on wake up. We will be late.”

This woman has a playful smile, kind eyes.

Jay want to please her as much as he want to make Talia proud. He thinks he knows her with how happy she makes him by just being there. He stupidly smile at her and slowly he starts to stand up.

His feet touch the soft grass in the same times he smells lavender. He seems like he falls asleep on the blanket where they had picnic.

Their water pitcher is still hall full of fresh water, some fruits are still uneaten. He can’t help himself but take a grape to eat it.

His juice is so delicious. He moans with pleasure without thinking of stopping himself.

“Come on.” She says again before disappear between the trees.

He goes after her, but he didn’t make a step that her voice resonated.

“Don’t forget Ace.”

Jay turn his head and see the puppy asleep on the blanket. Carefully, he doesn’t dare wake him up and take the little puppy in his arms, shushing him when he starts to mumble.

Every time he thought he lost her, she appears and shows him the way with her playful smile. Until they arrives to a riverside.

Here, a man swimming on the middle of the river welcomes them with a bright smile.

“Jaylad, we were waiting for you. Come here.”

The woman enters in the water to hug the man who tenderly kiss her cheek.

Jay doesn’t dare to move. The scenery is too beautiful. How can he dare bother them?

“Last in the water is a fool! A young man exclaims before taping his back and goes to the water

Despite he obviously bothers the couple, all of them laugh.

“He is older than you but you’re more mature. A redhead woman sitting on the river side sighs. But we love him like that.”

And without letting Jay answers, she stand up and goes rejoin them.

Just when Jay wanted to go on the water too, Ace keep mumble more and more visibly disturbed.

“That’s ok Master Jason. Let me take care of him.” An old man in impeccable suit told him

Jay nods and puts Ace in the old man’s arms.

Unexpectedly, Ace totally wake up and bite the old man on the neck, killing him. Jay screams terrified and tries to run far away of the suddenly dangerous dog. But he is stopped by the man who have catch his arms. How fast is he? He was in the center of the river not a minute age.

“No, comes with us. You will be safe.”

Jay want to believe him, he really wants, but something boils in him when he saw the man kicks the dog.

The clear blue water turns into muds, maggots exit the ground, and the dog turns more like a werewolf. Even the kind expression of the man becomes menacing.

“Jaylad, come with me.”

He doesn’t know what to do.

Before he can decided an arrow hit the man right in the chest, then another in his head.

Jay can’t stop screaming, yelling, crying. Everything was so beautiful, why is it turn as a nightmare?

                                                      ~*~

Lian is wake up in the middle of the night by coughs. They really scare her because she never knows how awful they will be. This time it wasn’t that bad, but she wants to drink a cup of water.

She looks to see if Colin is asleep, he is. She looks to see if Dami is asleep, he is not here.

She frowns then wake up Colin.

“What? He groans

-Did you argues with Dami again? She asks

-What? No … Why?

-He is not there.

-What?”

Colin stand up and have to admit that Dami isn’t in the room. What worried is that Jay is not there too.

This two have admit that a member of their family is after them and it is safer to travel on group. Why should they have go somewhere alone on the middle of the night?

The two kids go wake up Roy.

“What the fu…dge? What the fudge kids?

-Did you argue with Jay? Lian asks

-No. Roy defends himself blushing furiously. Why?

-Where are they then?

-Where are who? Roy asks not totally wake up

-Jay and Dami. Where are they?”

Roy frowns and look around. Neither Jay nor Dami is there. It doesn’t look like Jay to leave without tells him with the men of their patriarch after them.

“Stay here. Don’t open the door. Roy orders them while taking his bow and arrows. I will go where they can be.”

Lian and Colin look at him with big worried eyes, but they nod and obey.

After looking at some corridors, Roy goes on the deck. He really hopes they are not there with the rainstorm. They risk falling overboard and disappear between the waves.

Of course, his wish isn’t fulfilled.

At first, he didn’t realize what he saw. Jay is next to a lifeboat with Dami in his arms and he is chatting with someone Roy doesn’t recognize. Maybe this is some friends or nice strangers. He can hope.

Before he can call out Jay and asks him if everything is alright, he sees something so absurd he stops to think for a moment; Jay gives Dami to the stranger.

He frowns and thinks maybe they are friends. But before he can finish his though, Dami suddenly stab again and again the stranger in the neck.

Jay seems panicked, he yells and cries. He even tries to run away but he is catch up.

Roy doesn’t have to think anymore.

He knows that no matter what awful thing Dami can do, he cares too much about Jay to do anything that could hurt him. He knows that Jay will do anything to protect Dami so he would have never let anyone kick him.

He aims an arrow to the other stranger that touches him right in the chest, another in the head.

Jay panics even more. He is even ready to go overboard when Dami approaches him.

Dami catch him to force him stay on the boat. An awful mistake.

Jay kicks him violently while yelling and crying.

Roy is finally close enough to intervene between the two brothers. He places himself in front of Dami.

“Are you ok, kid?

-No! Jay is not himself! I don’t know what happen to him!

-Are you hurt?

-Tt … I’m fine. Don’t let him go.”

Roy can’t answer because Jay tries again to go overboard.

Immediately, Roy catches him and knowing that Jay will react violently, he is ready to take the hits.

Despite the taste of the blood in his mouth, Roy tries to wake him up with words. But when Jay tries to punch Dami again, when the kid want simply to help, Roy slaps Jay’s face.

He feels bad with how sad and lost Jay’s eyes are, but at least they are more lucid too.

“They’re all going to die! Jay cries hugging Roy. They’re all going to die!

-Everything is alright Jay. You’re here with us. With Dami and me. Remember?

-Dami! Where is he? How is he?”

He finally sees Dami. His face is covered by blood and he is perplexed by Jay, like it is the first time he sees him.

“What happen? Dami asks trying to hide his fears

-I don’t know … I don’t understand …I keep seeing faces … So many faces …”

Dami doesn’t hesitate anymore and hugs his brother who doesn’t want let him go. In the meantime, Roy takes the bodies to throw them up overboard.

“I’m so sorry … Dami I love you so much … I don’t understand…

-Guys, we should go back to our room before a wave takes us with it.” Roy says

The brothers dry their tears and stand up. They go back to the room in silence.

                                                           ~*~

Colin and Lian gasp when they saw how pitiful they are.

“Dami, what happen to you? Colin asks touching with many care his bloody face

-Tt, that’s fine.

-It’s not. Jay contradicts searching for a tissue to give him a quick wash

-Let me to do it. Roy says. And dry you up.

-No, I will do it.”

While the adults argue, Colin sight and take the tissue to take care of Damian that he forces to sit, while Lian encourage Dami to undress and accept the sheet on his shoulders.

“What’s happen? Colin asks again

-We were attacked.

-I can’t believe it doesn’t wake up us. Where are you hurt? Colin ask when he sees no scratches

-I’m fine. It’s not my blood.”

Sure enough when Colin helps Damian to change, he sees no cut or any injury bleeding. But there is a bruise on his shoulder.

“Could be worse. Colin admits

-Told you.”

In the meantime, Roy tries to calm down Jay.

“I don’t understand my vision neither why I bring Dami to them. Jay frightened

-You have never been a sleepwalker?

-No!

-I don’t know what to tell you. Maybe these men drug you or hypnotized you earlier without we saw them.”

Jay is skeptical, but what else it can be?

                                                       ~*~

Fortunately, they don’t have to spend another night on the boat, but this event creates uneasiness they can’t let it go.

Even when some musicians play joyful music for the passengers, and Roy convince Jay do dance with him, using as excuse that it’s for his lessons, they couldn’t feel safe until they arrive to Gotham.

Which is a shame.

Roy persuaded that Jay must don’t know how to dance first taking the lead until it was pretty clear for everyone that Jay was a better dancer than Roy.

“Is there something you don’t know how to do? Roy playful asks

-One or two.” Jay falsely modestly answer even if he must admit he doesn’t know how to calm his heart and stop blushing around Roy

                                                  ~*~

Finally they are in Gotham. Dinah make sure a taxi will wait for them at the port and bring them at Duchess Kate’s home.

The conductor is nice and asks if they want him to wait, telling them that she rarely accept visitor, but they refuse.

After that, Roy and Jay aren’t surprised when Duchess Katherine Kate’s domestic refuse to let them see her without a rendez vous, but it’s raining, they could at least let them enters.

Since the domestic accept to give Dinah’s letter to Kate, Jay and Roy decide to stay a little around in case she wants to meet them once the letter read.

They’re waiting outside, making what they can so the kids don’t catch cold.

After half one hour, Jay and Roy start discuss about find a place to sleep and stay warm and come back tomorrow. Then suddenly, Duchess Katherine herself opens the door to face them.

She watches them all, her eyes stay longer on Jay and Damian’s face.

“Oh my … That should be interesting!” She exclaim with a wide smile and malicious eyes

[spectraspecs-writes]

Dantooine - Chapter 43 (Mission)

Link to the masterpost. Chapter 42. Chapter 44.

@isquirtleinyoureye thank you for reading you get a tag, last call tho dude

——–

Before I head out to the grove, I want to stop by the Hawk. For one thing, I haven't been there for two weeks and I miss my friends. And for another, more practical reason - I’ve got a weird feeling about this task, and I want some good armor and some energy shields before heading out, as well as my good stamina implant.

I knock on the bulkhead. “Hey, anybody home?”

“RENA!” Suddenly this blue force rams into me in a full-bodied hug - Mission, gotta be. “I haven’t seen you in a month!”

“I missed you, too, Mission.”

With one last squeeze, she lets go of me and pulls me into the main hold. “I can’t believe you’re a Jedi now, that’s so cool!”

“Not exactly,” I say, “There’s still a little training I have to do.”

“More training?” Carth asks, coming into the main hold from the cockpit, “They’re had you holed up in there for a month and there’s still more you have to do?”

“Not much, just one more test, then I’m a full Jedi.”

“What kind of test?”

“I don’t really know, something about confronting the Dark Side.”

“Perhaps they’re having you test yourself in battle,” Canderous says. I honestly didn’t hear him come in. “I did the same once myself.”

“The Jedi aren’t like Mandalorians, Canderous,” Carth says, “I doubt it would be something so crass as a simple battle.”

“No battle is simple if the enemy is worthy, Republic,” Canderous answers sharply.

“Boys, boys, enough,” I say, trying to stop them. 

“They’ve been arguing like that at least once a day,” Mission says, but evidently they aren’t important enough to distract her for long. “Can you show me something cool with the Force?”

“I’m not sure Master Zhar would approve of me using the Force for party tricks,” I say, and she looks disappointed. “But…” And she looks excited again. I take a quick look around the main hold - Carth and Canderous are bickering right under a coolant vent - a series of air shafts that funnel hot air away from the engine. The lever to open it is on the other side of hold, but I can switch it with just a flick of the wrist. “Watch this,” I whisper to her, and focusing on the switch, I flick my wrist at it. 

The air vent suddenly opens and Carth and Canderous are blasted with warm air, stopping the argument cold. Mission laughs her high pitched laugh while the boys try to recover and I flip the switch back.

“Very funny,” Carth says sarcastically, straightening out his jacket, “Cute. Did you come back here for a reason, or just to berate me?”

“I see no reason it can’t be both,” I say with a shrug. Carth glares at me a bit - he’s taking this awfully personal. I was just goofing off, chill out, dude. “I was about to go out and complete the task the Jedi Council asked of me, and I wanted to grab an energy shield and some armor.”

“Can I go with you?” Mission asks quickly, “I’m gonna lose it if I stay here much longer.”

“I’d love your help, Mission.”

“Count me in, too,” Canderous says, “I’ve heard tell of Mandalorian raiders on these plains. I look forward to showing them what a real warrior can do.”

“I would have thought you’d take the opposite stance, Canderous,” Carth says. Here we go again. “After all, they’re vicious pirates. Sounds just like a Mandalorian to me.”

“They’re pathetic!” Canderous growls, “They’re taking scraps when they should be taking worlds!”

Okay, I’m not sitting through another spat. “I’ll be glad to have you, Canderous. Suit up,” I say to him and Mission, “We’ll leave in a bit.”

I grab my energy shield, my implant, and the Echani armor I found on Taris. Mission picked out some combat armor and some sunglasses I know she took from my stuff but I’ll forgive it this time because she looks good in them. Canderous is definitely overdressed and wearing some heavy armor I don’t even remember finding. Maybe he bought it? No idea. But we’re set to go so we do.

“Mission, what’s this I heard about Griff?” I ask her, because I’ve been wanting to ask her about it for two weeks, “Carth told me you heard something.”

“Yeah!” she says, and I can tell she’s got a story to tell and she’s just been waiting for me to come back so she can tell it. “So a couple weeks ago, Lena turns up again, the core slime. And she’s all like, Mission it’s so good to see you again and all that crap. So I’m like, stop lying you nerf-herder, because she took Griff away from me!” (I’m nodding along with the story, she’s very expressive.) “And so she’s like, Mission what are you talking about? She said Griff was the one who decided to leave me behind!”

“No way!” I exclaim as the droid lets us pass into the courtyard, “That lying schutta!”

“Right? And she was just standing there, trashing my brother, calling him bad news and Hutt-spawn! I can’t believe she’d even try lying to me about him like that, saying that Griff wanted to leave me behind even though she offered to pay for my ticket. She told me he thought looking after me was holding him back.”

Now I’m not so sure. This sounds like a lot of lies in sequence. And if you’re only a casual liar - which is most people, I’ve only met one or two serious liars - your lies aren’t so well-thought out and in sequence. “Do you think any of it’s true?”

“Don’t tell me you believe it!” she gasps at me, shifting her anger from Lena to me.

“No, I didn’t say that. I’m just wondering if there’s anything she said that you buy.”

“Well, she said he was always blaming other people for his problems,” she says, ‘He did do that. And she said he was working for Czerka on Tatooine.”

“We could probably verify that if we stop on Tatooine at some point. If we have time.”

“I’m just glad he’s free of her,” Mission says. Then she thinks for a moment. “Only…”

“What?”

“Sometimes I think about what she said. There might have been some truth to it.”

“How do you mean?”

“What if... what if it was his idea to leave me behind? I'm not saying Griff would just abandon me. But maybe... maybe he did want to leave me behind.” She stops, planting her feet in the grass. I go back to her, and Canderous goes forward a bit before stopping, like he’s guarding us a little. “Just temporarily, you know?” she says, “He might have done that if he planned on coming back later.”

“Makes sense. Why pay more shuttle fare than you have to?”

“Right. But things didn't usually work out for Griff the way he planned, you know? And that's when he'd get in trouble,” she says, “He was always borrowing money he could never pay back. He might have been trying to skip out on his debts when he left Taris. He would have had to leave his little sister behind so it would look like he was coming back.”

“So he just… he sacrificed you to save his own hide?” I say. Sounds cold.

“Yeah... well, no,” Mission stammers, “Not exactly. Look, all I'm trying to say is that the more I think back the more I realize I might be idolizing my brother a bit. Not seeing all his faults. I still want to find him, if we can. I need to see him again. It's just that I'm not sure how I'll react when I do.”

“I think you’ll know what to say when the time comes,” I tell her, taking her hand comfortingly.

“Maybe,” she says, smiling at me, “We'll see. I don't... I don't want to judge him yet. Maybe Lena was lying. Or maybe... maybe she wasn't. All I know is I'd like to speak to Griff myself. If we have time, I'd like to go talk to the Czerka Corp rep on Tatooine and see what he has to say about where my brother is now.”

“If we can, it’s the first place we’ll go.”

“Thanks, Reen.” I love that nickname.

“Can we get going?” Canderous says, “I’ve got a bad feeling.”

“What sort of bad feeling?” Missions asks.

“No,” I say, ‘I feel it, too.” It just came, it was pretty sudden. I pull my lightsaber from my belt. “Mission, yo might want to pull out your vibroblade.”

“Got it,” she says, and she does.

Canderous leads us forward. I feel the Force start to pull me in a different direction, but it’s not so insistent that it won’t still be there after we’ve dealt with this feeling.

Suddenly Canderous stops. Listens. Then he shouts, “Kath hounds!” and fires his rifle at the barking mass of fur I suddenly see running at us. 

Without even thinking, I spring into action - literally spring, since I apparently Force jumped right to the kath hound, and I didn’t even know I could do that. I don’t like the idea of killing animals, but this feeling. Looking into the kath hound’s eyes, it isn’t just an animal looking for lunch. And what Master Zhar said - the Dark Side is twisting nature. Kath hounds generally tend to avoid people. But these three came right to us. Something’s wrong here. And I think it’s only a symptom of a bigger problem.

Mission slices at the last kath hound, and they lie dead at our feet. “That’s one thing you didn’t get on Taris is animals attacking you out of nowhere!”

“Rakghouls?”

“Well, yeah, but that’s different,” she says, “Rakghouls are… rakghouls…”

“Rakghouls just wanted to infect,” Canderous says, “Like they were rabid. These kath hounds weren’t rabid. Something’s wrong here.”

“I think that’s what the Council wants me to fix,” I tell them both.

“Well, you’re the Jedi here,” Canderous says, “Where should we head?”

I turn back around. “Something pulled me in this direction,” I say, “I think we should follow it.”

He pulls his rifle back up. “Lead the way.”

[iceprincessmiyu]

Off on a New Adventure

Just a little short story I wanted to write as an in between for the two fics I'm working on with my OC and the SwSh cast! (The first story is when they are all young and taking part in the Gym Challenge, and the second is many years later, just before the events of the game take place!) This story takes place two years after Leon becomes champion and they are all around 12 years old.

Hiki paced around as she waited for each of her friends to arrive. She asked them to meet her in their old "hideout" in the Wild Area where they used to meet with each other and camp together during their gym challenge. She had news to tell them, but she wasn't quite sure how they would take it.

Finally, they arrived. "Alright, we're all here. What did you need to tell us, Hiki?" Raihan asked. "Hope it's important! I was in the middle of training Flygon for my next match with this guy!" He lightly punched Leon's arm as he said this.

Hiki kicked a rock that was in front of her, something she did often when she was nervous. "Well… I'd say this is pretty important."

"Then you have our full attention!" Leon responded with a bright smile. 

She took a deep breath and sighed. "Okay… well you see… all of you have been working so hard lately chasing after your dreams, and I… still have no idea what my dream is."

"That's okay, Hiki! You don't have to know right away! We're still kids, so you have plenty of time!" Sonia said. 

"Yeah, but the thing is, I'm just not sure I'm going to find it here in Galar." Hiki lowered her head. "I called my mom last night and she offered to buy me a ticket to come back home to see her and sign me up for the Johto Pokemon League this year."

Leon felt his heart drop to his stomach. "Wait… you're leaving?? You won't be here to see my Champion Cup battle this year?" But she was his best friend! She had been there for every battle since he had become champion!

"I'll still be able to stream it live! I'd never miss it for anything! I know how importa--"

"It's not the same. You promised you'd always be there to cheer me on." He shook his head, the disappointment very clear in his voice.

"Lee…" Sonia started and placed a hand on his shoulder but he just shrugged it off and stormed away. She then turned to Hiki, with a worried expression on her face. "Hiki, I'm so sorry… I don't know what's gotten into him."

Raihan chased after Leon, and Hiki and Sonia could hear him shouting at him in the distance. Hiki sat back on a rock and sighed. "No, it's okay. I should have seen this coming…" 

"Don't worry about it, okay? He will be fine. Just give him some time! He'll realize what a big step forward this will be for you and I just know he'll support you! He's probably just sad that we won't be able to see you for a while, which is something we are all feeling." Sonia hugged her friend, tightly. "We are going to miss you, but you've gotta do what's best for you!"

Hiki returned the hug with a thankful smile on her face. "Thank you, Sonia."

---

Over the next few days, Hiki hadn't heard a single word from Leon and grew very worried. It was almost time for her to board the train that would take her to the airport in Wyndon and only Sonia and Raihan had shown up to see her off. 

"You have everything you need, right?" Sonia asked. 

"I think so," Hiki responded, a little distracted as she searched through the crowd, hoping Leon was only running late because he got lost again. "Do you think he's coming?"

Raihan sighed and rubbed the back of his head. "Sorry, Hiki. I tried… He didn't answer his phone."

"This is the final boarding call for the 2:00pm train to Wyndon. Final boarding call."

Hiki groaned before hugging the two of her friends. "I guess we're out of time. Just… tell him I said goodbye, okay? I'm really going to miss all of you!" She grabbed her bag and hurried to the gate, quickly turning her back to her friends so they wouldn't see the tears in her eyes.

---

She got to her seat and wiped her eyes. She knew he was upset, but would it really have killed him to at least say goodbye? 

Not long after the train began moving, Hiki heard whispers throughout the train car. "Is that who I think it is??" "Was he supposed to board the train or something?" "I heard a rumor that he gets lost all the time, so maybe he missed the train!"

"Hm?" Hiki peered out the window to see an unexpected scene; a Charizard flying alongside the train! But not just any Charizard…

"You're right! It's Champion Leon!" "Someone get the conductor's attention! I think he's trying to get on!"

"Y-You're kidding!" Hiki said to herself as she stared out the window in disbelief. What did he think he was doing??

Before long, the train came to a halt and many passengers on the train pulled out their Rotom phones and snapped pictures, cheering as their new passenger recalled his Charizard and boarded the train.

"Sorry, excuse me. Uh, thank you! That's very kind of you but there's someone I need to see," Hiki heard him say as he pushed through the crowd. He stopped in front of her with an apologetic look on his face.

"...you're late," she told him once the car quieted down, unable to hide the disappointment she had been feeling. "I thought you hated me for leaving."

"Hate you? You're my best friend, I could never hate you!" He sat down next to her, fiddling with something in his hand. "Honestly, I had every intention of coming to see you off with Sonia and Raihan, but I… might have forgotten where the station was."

Hiki couldn't help but crack a laugh. "I should've known better… I'm just glad you made it. I would have been so mad at you if you didn't say goodbye!" She smacked his arm playfully, before crossing her arms and sticking her bottom lip out in a pout.

"I know, I know…" He didn't want to tell her that Sonia and Raihan noticed her crying as she boarded the train. "But hey! I brought you a going away present! Just don't open it until you get to Johto, okay? It hatched last night!"

He handed her a Pokeball with a ribbon tied around it. "A Pokemon? Really?" She stared down at the ball in her hands. "Thank you, Leon! I promise I'll take really good care of it!"

"I trust that you will!" he responded with a wide grin. A moment later, however, the grin faded and he sighed. "Listen… I'm really sorry for the way I reacted the other day in the Wild Area. I guess I just never expected you to want to go so far away, but it wouldn't be fair to ask you to stay if you weren't happy here."

"I won't be gone forever, silly! I just want to get out and see the world… discover the type of trainer I'm really meant to be! I'm just not cut out to be a champion like you or a researcher like Sonia, and as much as my mother would want me to I can't see myself as a gym leader like Raihan is training to be. I want to do my own thing, you know?" 

"Yeah, I understand! And no matter what that ends up being, I'll be rooting for you the whole way!" he told her, while pumping a fist in the air. "But there's just one favor I want to ask of you."

"Hm?" Hiki tilted her head. "What is it?"

"Don't forget to call! All the time!! Even if I'm busy, I want to hear what you're up to! I just know you'll have lots of exciting adventures out there!" he exclaimed. 

"I promise! And you try your best not to lose your title to Raihan," she said with a giggle. "He would be unbearable as champion!" she joked.

"Please, theres no way I'm going to lose my title to anyone! I bet I'll still be undefeated by the time you get back!" he said with his hands on his hips. He sounded so confident! But then again, this was how he always was.

---

When the train arrived at the station, the two young trainers stepped outside and turned to face each other. Hiki had a sad smile on her face and almost had second thoughts about leaving. She really didn't know if she would make any new friends when she got back to Johto. It could be lonely.

Leon wrapped his arms tightly around his friend and hugged her tightly. "You're going to be great out there! I believe in you!"

Tears filled her eyes again for what felt like the hundredth time that day upon hearing him say those words. They meant so much more to her than even she understood. He was such a good friend. "Thank you, Lee. I won't let you down!"

She grabbed her things and walked toward the airport entrance, but before going inside she turned and waved to him one last time.

---

Hours later when she arrived in Johto, she sat on the bed in her old bedroom and held the Pokeball Leon had given her as a gift. He said it had just hatched recently… Did that mean this was from an egg he had received? Her curiosity was too strong to wait any longer and she released the creature from the ball.

"Char?" it cried. What sat on the floor in front of her was none other than a baby Charmander! How on earth did he get ahold of a Charmander egg?? Either way, she felt so much love for the small Pokemon instantly.

"Welcome to the team, Charmander. I'm your new trainer, Hiki! It's nice to meet you!"

End

[pendulum-sonata]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Shoujo Kakumei Utena | Revolutionary Girl Utena Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Kiryuu Nanami, Shinohara Wakaba Additional Tags: Character Study, Post-Canon, Introspection, Memory Alteration, Repressed Memories, Utena Future Zine, This is basically my take, on how Nanami's life would have been, after graduating Ohtori, I swear I love Nanami, I'm not trying to make her suffer, Just for the hell of it, Sexual Harassment Summary:

The outside world has left Nanami en enbittered woman, down on her luck and with little hope. A chance encounter with an old classmate helps her get back on her feet.

This is my work for the @utenafuturezine Now available for download here!

‘I don’t want to get up, I don’t want to get up, I don’t…’

But the music on the radio got louder and louder and she knew the moment the annoying voice of the conductor came in she would be unable to go back to sleep, what time was it anyway? Without removing the covers her hand fished for her cellphone.

7:05 am.

She had an interview at 9:00 am.

‘Uugh... I will count until ten, and then I’ll wake up...”

One, two, three, four...

“Damn it!” Nanami kicked the bed covers and got up, feeling her messy hair falling around her shoulders, she had to blink a few times and scroll down her phone to finally wake up and start for the day.

There, perched on the bathroom room were the clothes she prepared for today, somehow... they looked better last night, she didn’t like how the dark blue looked a little too ...dark, as if she was going to a funeral rather than (hopefully) to work.

She didn’t have time to go through her clothes again.

That was what she kept telling herself as she opened her closet, pulling out shirts and pants... or maybe a skirt would do? Nanami shook her head, skirts made you look juvenile and they were not professional; but none of the combinations made her feel satisfied.

But then a pale yellow shirt from way below all her stuff peeked at her, in her mind she already knew the color would be perfect; even though it was obvious the shirt was old for her not to remember when she bought it, it didn’t look worn off, the color wasn’t too vibrant that it stung your eye, in fact it was the perfect shade to compliment her hair...

Of course the universe loved to bait her, because when she lifted it to her eyes there it was:  the garish logo of a restaurant, the one where she had first worked as a waitress for almost a year.

‘Why do I even still have this?’ She wondered and for a full minute she could only remember the embarrassment of it, all the shifts, the rude and lechery customers and the miserable pay... when she opened her eyes the shirt was crumpled in her hands with such force that it felt like she could have teared it apart piece by piece...

She couldn’t afford to throw away a perfectly good shirt though.

And with the perfect accessories, vest and jacket, nobody would be able to look at the logo in the shirt (Why did it have to be printed? if it only was sewn in...).

Nanami resigned herself and went to make herself a quick breakfast, a quick make over, a quick hairdo and quickly started to gather everything she would need; train ticket? Check, money? Check, keys? Check, phone? Check!

‘Best of luck to myself!’

ᴥ

“Watch were you’re going!” She got up to her feet before anyone noticed she had fallen, wincing when she felt a pang in her knee.

Fortunately her pants had not sustained any damage or stain, but she still looked around, ready to yell at the guilty person who crashed into her-

“Oh god! I’m so sorry! Are you alright?” The woman in question didn’t seem to notice how angry Nanami was, there was nothing remarkable about her: medium height, brown hair and average complexion, the most noteworthy thing about her was her shrilling voice that made her want to get away as soon as possible.

Nanami was not in the mood for this. She tried to walk past her, but the woman quickly stood on her way.

“Move! I’m gonna lose my train or do you want me to be late too?” She practically growled.

“Oh, sorry you’re right! Let me pay you for a cab then!” The woman said again and when Nanami saw her reach for her purse she lost it.

“Who the hell do you think I am!? I don’t need for your charity!” Once she said this, Nanami stormed out without even waiting for an answer, she didn’t need to arrive in a cab, she didn’t want to, and she most definitely didn’t want to own some random woman in the street a favor so she just kept walking to her station.

Dread filled her every time she saw the train cart full of people almost squished against the windows, when some people came out of she realized that she needed to be quick, otherwise she would have to take the next train, she was quick to walk past all the people next to her and secure her place.

Commuting using the train was a living nightmare.

Unfortunately it was also the cheapest and faster, so it wasn’t like she had lots of options, meaning that here she was, squished between dozens upon dozens of employees, both men and women, she looked with envy to the ones that wore their casual clothes and comfortable shoes, no, not because they have super nice clothes – they were all cheap common clothes anyway – but because it meant that they already had a job and their office uniform waiting for them.

She teared her eyes away from the sight, her station was the last one in the route anyway so by the time she made it, and the train would most likely be empty anyway.

ᴥ

It was packed.

The place where they would all be waiting for their interviews was packed, and she hated herself for admitting this – only in her thoughts, never out loud – but they all resembled her: wearing their best clothes, their hair done modestly but still professional...

She didn’t want to think about it anymore and just walked to the receptionist, gave her name and her papers and sat, far away from the other girls chatting away in purpose.

It was a long time, or at least it felt like a really long time, even the games and apps she had in her phone didn’t do much to distract her, her shoes tapped fast onto the floors and looked around the place looking for something, anything to focus on that wasn’t the clock on the wall, but there was nothing.

“Kiryuu Nanami?” She perked up immediately when she heard her name and entered the office the lady at the desk signaled for.

Inside there was an old man, his wrinkles and glasses made Nanami think vaguely of a grandpa, but she already knew companies put their best ‘face’ for these things, so she had to be careful with what she said.

“Miss Kiryuu? Please take a seat?” Ugh, even his voice sounded gentle and soft, no doubt this guy was a professional.

“Pleased to meet you.” Nanami put on her best smile and used her perfect posture – one that allowed her to make use of her best assets without looking unprofessional – and answered his questions, most of them were the usual:  her age, experience, career, how did she find out about the position, etc.

“Excellent Miss, now, everything seems to be in order, but may I ask when can we expect your family registry? It’s not an optional requisite.”

And just like that Nanami knew it was a lost cause.

ᴥ

It was just another day; tomorrow would be another.

Nanami put these words on repeat while she waited for the train back home, but the fact that she had lost not just the morning but the entire day in that office and that she was starting to see a lot of people who were coming back from work didn’t really help her mood, so she got ready to squish herself once more for the sake of arriving to her apartment and forget this entire day had happened.

Once inside the train, trapped between a woman who had her case in front of her which dug painfully into her shoulder and a guy whose breaths were hitting her right in the face, the world decided once more play her for a fool.

Because she felt a hand –  a grown man’s hand – going from her back then to her butt.

For a full minute her mind went blank because she couldn’t believe on top of everything this had happened to her now, the moment it finally dawned on her what was happened she tried to squirm to get away from the groping but it only resulted on the people throwing dirty looks at her, and her arms were now twisted in weird angle that would probably result on more pain later on.

She was trapped.

During the entire trip until the next station she tried to think of the things she needed to buy for the week, tried to make the budget too, tried to remember the lyrics of that one song in the radio she really liked it, anything to not think about the hand on her.

‘Only a bit more Nanami, only a little more, hang in there, then you can unleash all your fury onto them and…’

*ARRIVING TO THE STATION, PLESE CLEAR UP THE ENTRANCE.*

What?!

The thought got stuck on her head when she was almost barreled by a group of people all hurrying past here, she was sure she might have given a few turns in between people and maybe earned a couple of bruises from the things people were carrying and scrapping her in the meantime.

After she was able to focus again she realized the car was almost empty again except for a couple of old ladies.

“You got to be kidding me!” Her heels stomped on the floor and she stormed out of the cart, maybe if she hurried she would be able to-

Nothing, there were too many people on the platform and most of them were dressed the same.

“You pervert!!!” The yelling doesn’t come from her but from behind her where a security guard is standing in front of a woman and another man who looks like wants to get away, especially because the yelling starts to attract attention from everyone else.

He can’t of course because a lithe as looks the woman has an iron grip on his wrist, when she tries to get close, she can see the guard is not taking seriously anything the woman says, if anything he looks bored and other people are doing nothing but whisper around them.

“I know what I saw!!” The woman suddenly looks around her and fixes her eyes on Nanami and she just froze in place. “Nanami you tell them! He groped you! I saw him!!”

It’s in that moment that she realizes is the same woman from this morning, the one who made her trip and apparently decided she looked pitiful enough to offer her a ride! Nanami had half her mind to disagree with her – she still felt her teeth grind at the thought – and embarrass her, but when she looked at the guy who was doing his best to look as if he was completely innocent.

She had no way of knowing if had been the pervert who grabbed her butt, it had been impossible for her to see anything about the man, but the shifty way he looked when Nanami tried to look into his eyes made her realize that even if he didn’t grab her, he had definitely done that to someone else.

Or maybe not, in true Nanami was just tired of being a cosmic plaything for the day, let someone else take the brunt for her.

So, she summoned her best laugh and pointed at the man with all her might.

“You pervert!” She yelled. “You took advantage of me! I could see your dirty face when you grabbed me! In. my. Ass. And now you’re trying to get away with it!! Like hell I will let you do it!” She grabbed her phone and snapped a shot from the guy, who was now so scared that he looked blue in the face. “And you!” She pointed to the guard now who flinched when she pointed at him. “Isn’t your job to attend to all security matters in the platform? Aren’t you supposed to make people feel safe? Well, I can tell I didn’t feel safe, I’m disgusted by this man, but I’m more disgusted by you! Who don’t even bother to take their job seriously and allow scum like him to get away with things?” She snapped another shot of him, making sure his plaque and name were visible on her picture – she knew the camera with 10 megapixels had been worth it – and she showed it to him. “Just so you know if you don’t process this complain, I’m not gonna bother with your bosses, I’m going to post these on the internet and you will be ruined along with these man’s reputation!”

“Well, you heard her? Is that what you want?” The woman who had been looking shocked while she was yelling was now standing next to her looking proud. “You know nowadays, news fly right?”

Both men shared a dismayed look specially when other people were pulling out their phones too, some of them taking pictures others were probably tweeting about it and the guard finally escorted Nanami to his office.

ᴥ

After filling out some papers and giving out her information, and also gotten the information from the man, who had to be detained until actual police arrive from the looks of it, she excused herself, she didn’t want to make more of a deal than it already was, and at the very least she still had the pictures in case she found the same idiot again.

Nanami doubted anything would come out of the whole thing, but at the very least it had improved her mood a lot.

“That was so cool Nanami!” She almost screeched when she chirpy voice of the same woman caught her off guard. “I can’t believe what you actually threatened that guy!”

Wait… how did this broad even knew her name, even before when she called it, Nanami had been a little to swept into getting some well-deserved retribution to think about it too hard, but she had no idea who this woman was, she knew her name and this was the second time in a row that she conveniently found her…

Oh dear, was she dealing with a stalker?

“I can’t believe I found you here! It’s been so long since we were both in Ohtori Academy right?”

Or maybe not… was she a classmate? She looked around the same age as her, although it was hard to tell, she couldn’t have been one of her friends or popular people because she was sure she would remember that, but she was talking to her so casually, there was no other alternative.

“Y-yes! I suppose it has!” And she didn’t feel like making a fool out of herself for a second time in a single day.

“We have so much to catch up to! Oh, I know!” How could a grown woman look this excited and skip like that and not break her heel? It was a mystery for her. “Let’s have dinner together!”

In any other time Nanami would have been freaked out about having someone’s face so close to hers, but this time she took the chance to get a good look at her, to see if any feature struck a chord with her.

…Nothing, just like this morning her appearance was completely normal and that meant completely unremarkable and forgettable too. She did have a very large forehead though, still, she had her hair styled in a way that it complemented her features rather than call attention to it, Nanami would give her that much.

“Dinner? Uh…” She was actually very hungry, because she had spent the entire day at the office waiting for her interview, Nanami had not gotten any lunch, breakfast had been her only meal… but it’s already the second half of the month and she can’t afford to eat out, she has a bunch of cup ramen waiting for her at theapartment. “I don’t know, it’s pretty late and…”

“Oh come on!” The woman took her hand this time and got the most ridiculous face on her, teary eyes and pouting almost resembling a puppy. “I’m inviting you so dinner it’s on me!”

From all the things that could bait her, those were the ones she couldn’t refute.

And her belly decided to answer in her place.

ᴥ

She didn’t have a bad taste in restaurants, Nanami decided.

Even if it wasn’t anything too fancy – and really those types of restaurants where for romantic dates, not for friendly outings – the place had a warm and welcoming atmosphere, it also had the added bonus of having booths so they could have some privacy even if they were only two people, and the food smelled delicious, she hadn’t had lots of filling meals in a while now.

It was funny really, years ago she wouldn’t have even thought about putting a foot inside one of these… family restaurants.

Once they were seated and the waitress gave them a couple of menus, the woman kept chatting about their days back at school and despite herself Nanami tried not to let the guilt gnaw at her gut, because she really couldn’t be making out stuff on the spot and the fact she was buying her a meal… people did not do that for strangers they met for five minutes during middle school.

“…Anyway, that was quite a graduation ceremony! Some of my college buddies still tell the story whenever we get together and I think from that moment on, the rules on formal clothing were much more specific!” She laughed when she finished saying this and Nanami tried not to make herself sound too fake, lost in her musing she had not heard a word of what she said.

The waitress bringing them their drinks bought her some time.

“That sounds like quite a story, mmmh, how about in middle school though? We had some pretty weird stories right?” That’s right maybe if she shared a story she might remember! Or at least pretend until the food came and the bill was paid.

The woman looked like she was thinking for a long moment, she looked straight at her, not a hard stare or judging in anyway, but Nanami still felt as if she was being examined.

“Say…” She paused to take a sip of her drink.  “…you don’t really know who I am right?”

Time stopped and it was hard to breath because she was busy sputtering the water, her nose burned because she had asked it to be ice cold and godammit, this woman did it on purpose because this was the most ridiculous thing that could happen to her. She also felt someone patting her back and putting a napkin close to her mouth.

“Wakaba, what happened?” It was probably the waitress.

“Sorry, sorry, that was my fault.”

Wakaba…

‘Utena, aren’t you going to give a present to your best friend in the entire world?’

Who was the person who kept saying that? In her mind Nanami saw a girl, she couldn’t see her face clearly, the only thing she remembered was that she was a tomboy, countless of memories of this girl playing rowdy sports, wearing boy’s clothes, talking like a boy and with overall unladylike manners, the girl annoys her to no end, of that she is sure because she feels a vein in her head throb at the mere sight of her. There is also another girl, this one doesn’t annoy her, she wishes she would only annoy her, but no, the knot on her stomach and the chills running down her back whenever that girl was concerned were real and always made her feel like she entered a lion’s den.

Next to her, the tomboy girl’s oddness was welcome.

And of course she thinks she remembers another girl, she’s always there too, always following the other two around as if she was a puppy, she’s not annoying or scary like the them, she doesn’t remember anything about her, only her trailing behind the other two girls.

“Nanami? Are you alright? Can you see me? How many fingers am I holding?”

“I’m fine!!!” She yelled to whoever was holding three fingers right into her face, of course that attracted the attention of the other customers and Nanami wished she could sink into her seat.

“Sorry, you weren’t reacting and I was afraid you had choked or something.” She sounded genuinely sorry and that alone made her back down, also because she still felt her throat sore.

“I’m sorry Miss, was the water too cold? I can bring you more.” The waitress while weel-intentioned, looked less concerned for Nanami and more for being written up by her manager.

She couldn’t say she blamed her.

“Another glass is fine, thank you.”

“Right away Miss, oh Wakaba are you on shift tonight?” The waitress was talking to Wakaba now.

“No, I asked the day off.” Said Wakaba denying with her head.

The fell into an awkward silence after that, how could they not? How was she supposed to talk to her now that she outed herself as not really knowing her? They didn’t have any shared interest or hobbies and didn’t even seem to frequent the same circles as to ask about that either.

Then again it wasn’t like Nanami had kept in touch with her old classmates.

“So… you work here?” She has no trouble picturing Wakaba in the role of a waitress, she was tact, patient and give off was friendly enough to make small talk to customers, all things she herself absolutely failed at. “You don’t look like one to work on night shift though.”

She realized too soon that she had spoked the last thing out loud, Wakaba seemed to realize too and giggled a little.

“All my shifts are at night Nanami, I’m a bartender.” She pointed to the bar where right now there was another older guy mixing and serving drinks. “Mr. Kobayashi is going to retire soon, and he’s teaching me all he knows before that, so I guess you could say I’m like an apprentice.”

Nanami didn’t even knew women were permitted to become bartenders and she stopped herself right in time, that would have probably been rude and she had already called her a goody-two-shoes before, but what did she even knew about Wakaba to know if this was expected from her? She didn’t even remember her 5 minutes ago and what she remembered was so small that she could laugh at herself.

“So, Nanami what have you been up to? I noticed this morning that you were going to the corporate district.” Wakaba’s enthusiasm and self-contented smile was contagious and she found herself smiling too, wishing to have something exciting to share, something worth of her attention.

‘Not much, I was going to an interview, after finishing college, a gig as an intern I have been between jobs for the past year.’ Hmph, didn’t that sound pathetic?

While she thought about this, the waitress had finally brought their food, but Nanami had lost her apetite.

“Sorry, sorry, it’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it,” Wakaba apologized, even thought she was only making small talk, she was definitely nicer than herself. “I can only imagine how it has been for you and your brother.”

If a bull had entered the restaurant, trashed everything around just to take Nanami on its back to a faraway island, she would feel less shocked than she felt now and of course the shock gave way to embarrassment, the way Wakaba used her hand to cover half of her face was enough confirmation that she knew and that she was aware that she wasn’t supposed to know.

Ugh, her day couldn’t possibly suck anymore so she may as well get on with it.

“What else there is to say? That as it turned out neither me or Touga were our parents’ real children?” Back in school Nanami had thought that was the worst thing that had happened her, now she wished that was the only secret. “And not only that, we weren’t actually adopted, we were bought off, kept and groomed only to fulfill their wishes and ambitions, and that when Touga and I refused to do what they demanded from us – I was eighteen when they wanted me married off to a business partner who was old enough to be my grandfather – we were thrown out from the house and disowned?” Disown was such a proper word because they had been nothing but property to these people. “So go ahead and pity me, laugh in my face like I did to you and your friends so long ago.”

Nanami doesn’t want to look up to see Wakaba’s eyes, filling with disdain or pity.

“I… don’t want to do that.” Is the only thing Wakaba said, “I just thought I could cheer you up because you look so… tired”

Tired? Yes, that was the perfect word to describe how she had been feeling for quite a while now, not physically tired, but mentally and emotionally tired and done with everything around her.

“Do you ever wish things would have gone different? To just… give in to what people wanted from you?” It was a good question one that she herself had asked herself many times.

“There are… many things that I regret, sometimes I like telling to myself that if I could go back, knowing what I know now, I would do things different, better…” What she kept to herself though, was that another part of her knew she wouldn't do anything to change. “… And I do wish someone would have told me how hard it was to simply live by, how expensive it is, how many basic skills you need and I never learned until I had no one to lean onto than my equally incompetent brother.” There had been many times when she had become tempted to run back and beg for forgiveness and promise to be a good girl this time but… “No, I still wouldn’t do it.”

How could she? After a particularly nasty fight with Touga about it which had led to a very unceremonious reveal of what exactly their so-called parents had ‘requested’ from him, what they had took from him right under her nose.

“How do you know?” Nanami asked, she knew that it couldn't be Touga, he had nothing to gain from a girl like Wakaba.

“I don’t know if I should tell you, you would probably go hunt him down.” Wakaba laughed a little but it was obvious she wasn’t entirely kidding on the last sentence.

And there was only another person close enough to either of them to know the full story, and yes, Nanami could feel her fists balling at her sides and her mind was relishing into some payback fantasies.

“Idiot, as if I have time to waste on doing any of that.” After all, she knew he and Touga were still in contact, if she had wanted she would have no troubles contacting him, he had been the first one to reach out to them and had acted so sickly concerned that it was disgusting, her bruised pride had not let her think anything else back then.

“You know? At first I thought that you had not changed at all, but that was silly of me to think right? Everyone changes, you, your brother, even Saionji.” The blush that crept to Nanami’s face was not unwelcomed, it made her feel giddy even.

“I guess…” She picked the fork and started to play a little with her food, not knowing what to say in exchange, she had no frame of reference to know if Wakaba had changed… she did remember one thing though. “Well, feel proud of yourself, without his annoying fanclub around, you can finally have Saionli for yourself right?”

After all, if he had confided Wakaba with such sensitive information that meant they were in more than just speaking terms.

She didn’t expect the laughter that came from Wakaba.

“Oh I hardly doubt it, I’m not his type, and he’s no longer mine either.” Had that been because they both changed or because now adulthood gave them new perspectives, more options?   “You know?” She doubted for a second and her voice got quitter. “Back then, he practically begged me to talk to the manager about getting you a job.”

That was when Nanami finally noticed the name of the place on the cups and the napkins: it was the same name as the place she started her life as a working girl, the same name printed on the shirt she had so carefully hidden.

“Is not the same, I doubt your memory is that bad.” She laughed again. “the owner has a couple places all over the city and the prefecture….”

The only reason Nanami is not banging her head against the table is because she wants to think she still has a minimum of manners, she just started eating her meal, which had already gotten cold, but beggars can’t be choosers, they both ate in silence for quite a while, the only sounds coming from them were the cutlery scrapping against the plates.

“Hey Nanami…” Wakaba started. “You think we could hang out again? It’s nice to have someone from school to talk to.” She was smiling again, and Nanami could now see why people – even people like Saoinji – wanted to keep talking to her: it was easy, she didn’t have any grandiose expectations of people or even herself and life, it was… normal, comfortable.

“I… guess I can make a place on my schedule.” She exchanged phones with her without many words, and when she checked it, she couldn’t help notice there was another number she added.

“I don’t want to meddle, but maybe you too could call Saionji every once in a while?” Wakaba didn’t say that he too worried about her, but the sentiment was there nonetheless.

Nanami didn’t know what to say, all this new information didn’t let her think clearly and now she felt like she really had to re-acquaintance herself with the guy, only to see if he really was not an idiot anymore.

“Maybe.” She immediately took another bite, she had a lot of things to think about.

[wishful-daydream]

Illusive | chapter 1

Pairing: Jimin x fem!reader (probably other future pairings as well)

Summary: You try to conceal your own secrets while you start to uncover those of your new city. [supernatural au] 

Warnings: mentions of blood and violence

A/N: I wrote and rewrote this so many times ^^’ It took me so long to figure out this chapter and I’m still not fully satisfied, but I think it’s just interesting enough. I hope you think so! 

Your hands jostle the doorknob of a cold and dark room in desperation. All you can hear are hissing whispers and your own pants as you try to open the door again and again in vain. Suddenly the door falls over and you run as soon as you can, your bare feet hitting the carpet as you find yourself in an empty hallway. The white-walled house seems empty. You pass through the hall more leisurely now, glancing at the doors on either side of you with curiosity. The next door is ajar, and light passes through it into the dim hallway, so you step inside. In the room, you see nothing but a window and its light curtains hanging over the bed beneath it. At the foot of the bed, closest to where you stand, is a big wooden chest. You walk over to it and kneel, thinking that there must be something interesting inside. As you lift the heavy lid of the chest, you hear a chirp and suddenly a flood of bats flies out of the chest. You scream as they swarm you, their high pitched screeches the last thing you hear.

That dream plays through your mind as you sit in your literature class, not really listening to the professor. Even though you aren’t afraid of bats, the dream was ominous. Actually, every dream that you remember having here so far has either been scary or unsettling, and you hope that’s just your anxieties about moving here manifesting in dream form.

Your class finally ends, and everyone starts to exit the lecture hall as the professor blurts reminders of what the textbook is and to read the syllabus.

Too distracted by contemplating the meaning of your nightmare, you don’t realize that it’s raining when you step out of the room until your hair is already a little damp. Unfortunately, you don’t have an umbrella, and your jacket doesn’t have a hood, so you have to hurry to the train station.

As you look at all the students scattered around the campus, you notice the atmosphere at this school, and in this city, is a lot different from your old one. People tend to keep to themselves here, and don’t really regard each other unless they know each other - the opposite of your hometown. Though it’s strange to get used to, you prefer it over the way people used to pry into each other’s lives.

By the time you reach your the station your hair and jacket are soaked. You feel exhausted and cold, and you want to just go home and take a shower, but there isn’t much to eat at home so you decide to go to the store first. You buy your ticket and wait on the seats near the tracks next to another young woman, scrolling through Instagram to pass the time.

----

The sun is going down when you get home from the grocery store, a couple heavy bags in your hand and your backpack still on. You sigh and stop to rest, relieved you don’t have to walk any further and that it’s still light out - as light as it can be when the sky is cloudy.

You rub your free hand up and down your arm as you start to walk up the front yard, and you notice that your next door neighbor has just gotten home. He slips his key into the doorknob and pauses, glancing over his shoulder to look right at you. The black haired young man gives you a bewitching smile, then returns to unlocking his door. You don’t have time to return his smile, since he looked away so quickly it feels like he never looked at you at all. Not to mention you weren’t expecting him to suddenly glance over at you,  embarrassingly catching you looking at him - how couldn’t you when he’s that attractive? You linger for a moment while he disappears into the doorway, before walking up to yours to do the same

After flicking on the light, you set your groceries on the kitchen counter and start putting them away, that look on your neighbor’s face still on your mind. Even though it was a fleeting moment of eye contact, you keep thinking about it. You haven’t uttered anything but a “hi” to him in the several days you’ve been here, but he was still one of the only friendly people you’ve encountered. Every time he sees you, he never fails to acknowledge you with a smile.

One of the reasons your mom insisted you move here was because this city isn’t the same as your hometown, so you of course knew living here wouldn’t feel the same. You try not to make any judgments about this place yet, since it’s only been a few nights and you’ve mostly been at school or at home, but things feel so opposite here. Even the weather isn’t the same, but you don’t mind that because you prefer colder weather anyway.

Humming, you open the fridge to put away the milk and couple other things that belong there. You’ve taken to humming and singing around the house a lot since, unless you watch something on tv or your phone, there was rarely any other sound present. Silence was never something that bothered you but now that it was constant you didn’t like it as much.

Just when you open a cabinet to put the last groceries away, your wish for more noise is granted when you hear something hit the kitchen window.

You turn around slowly, nervous to check what might have made that sound. Should you ignore it? There are coyotes around here - your mom made sure to mention that a dozen times - but you doubt a coyote would hit the window…  You decide that you’ll wait until there’s another noise to investigate, but you know you don’t really have enough courage for that.

With all the groceries put away, you don’t have much more to do besides eat dinner and shower. As if moving to a whole new city to live by yourself for the first time isn’t overwhelming enough, starting school immediately after gave you no time to prepare mentally or adjust before you had things to do.

After eating dinner, you leave your dishes in the sink and don’t bother to wash them right now, both because you don’t want to be by the kitchen window and because you don’t feel like washing them. Right when you walk away from the window, you hear another sound outside, and in a surprising moment of bravery, you turn around and take a look. Nothing’s there.

“You’re just paranoid,” you mumble to yourself.

You still make sure to lock the doors and windows anyway before going upstairs with your backpack.

----

As the week goes by, you find yourself easily adapting to how things are here. You even start to ignore any sounds you hear at night, which by now you’re just convinced are normal - you probably wouldn’t even notice them if the house wasn’t always so quiet.

You also don’t mind living alone as much as you feared - besides at night, because a break in is one of your biggest fears. You might’ve lived with your parents before, but otherwise, you didn’t hang around many people besides in school. Even though you aren’t very lonely, your routine is starting to get monotonous already. Since you have no classes today, you go out for a walk to see more of the town.

Mostly you wanted to check out the cool shops that you found out about when you looked up things to do around here, but as soon as you get close, the area is closed off. There are police cars and yellow tape, and a crowd of people surrounding a news van. You consider if you should move closer, but someone stops you.

“I wouldn’t go over there,” you hear someone coming up behind you say. You recognize the brunette right away from one of your classes, and she seems to recognize you too when she realizes it’s you.

“Hey, we’re in the same photography class, right?,” she asks, her lips turned up into a smile.

You’re surprised she knows you since there are so many people in that class - you don’t even know her name. “We are,” you nod.

Her smile widens, “I knew it. Anyways, you shouldn’t go any closer. This one’s more disturbing than the last one.”

Last one? You grow uneasy at the thought that whatever happened is a regular occurrence around here. You look between your classmate and the crowd of people before asking. “What happened?”

She raises her brows, then furrows them. “Don’t tell me you don’t know about the attacks. Are you, like, new around here?”

“I just moved here this week,” you explain, and her expression instantly changes to one of confusion. You worry that you said something weird or made the conversation awkward somehow.

“Here? I can’t see why anyone would, but I guess you don’t know about the crime lately. There have been a few murders in the past couple months. All the victims were slashed somewhere and practically had all their blood drained.”

If you had known about this before, you definitely wouldn’t have agreed to move here. A moment of panic grips you, and you wonder how your mom could have neglected to find out about it. Surely she would have told you if she knew. Suddenly you’re more nervous to live alone again.

“Hey, don’t worry too much. They aren’t frequent and as long as you’re not out at night, you’ll probably be okay. Here, let me give you my number. Have you made any friends here yet?”

“No, not really,” you admit as you hand her your phone, hoping she doesn’t find that lame.

She hands it back to you a moment later with a smile, “Well, now you have. I gotta go now, but I’ll see you on Monday, y/n.”

“Oh, okay. See you then,” you say, waving back at her as she walks away. You look at the new contact to see her name is Dahyun, feeling grateful that she was so nice to you. A small part of you wants to be skeptical of it, and questions why she would befriend you when she doesn’t know you, and you reason it’s probably because of that.

Seeing as you can’t go to the shop, you decide to walk back home, giving the crime scene a final nervous glance before you turn around.

When you reach your neighborhood, you see a grey tabby cat up ahead. You try to approach it slowly so it doesn’t run away. The cat doesn’t seem to notice you and wanders onto your neighbor’s yard, its tail swaying behind it gracefully. You realize that this must be your neighbor’s cat, and you know you shouldn’t just walk onto his property but you can’t resist how cute his cat is. After all, just quickly petting her wouldn’t be so bad, right?

You follow the feline onto the yard, and she meows when she finally notices you. She doesn’t move away when you walk a little closer, only stands still as she swishes her tail slowly. Her chartreuse eyes examine you as you kneel down next to her before she takes a step toward you. You’re smiling the whole time, excited to be able to pet the pretty cat, or at least get very close to petting it.

“Hi, kitty,” you coo.

From the porch, Jimin sees you kneeling on his lawn, your open hand held out in front of you. The young man watches with interest as you patiently let the neighborhood cat sniff your fingers, an adoring smile gracing your lips. His own lips quirk at the sight, finding the interaction cute.

You gently pet the cat between the ears until she slowly retreats. Suddenly she lifts her head, meowing again more loudly and hauntingly, and you pull away slightly, your eyes wide. She lets another prolonged meow out and you stand to your feet, your eyes nervously scanning the area for witnesses to this strange ordeal. You’re met with the nonplussed stare of your neighbor and you gasp. He looks like he wants to say something, but you don’t allow him the chance because you bolt to your house, leaving the still yowling cat behind.

Jimin descends the steps of his porch and gives the tabby a questioning expression. “What was that?”

----

Almost every night since you moved in next door, the light from what Jimin presumed was your bedroom faintly bled through your curtains. The light would stay on until any time between 1 and 3 a.m.; hours he’s sure are unusual for most people. It isn’t as though the light bothers him. No, it doesn’t bother him at all. It’s just that he’s so curious. Are you reading? Doing homework? Are you afraid of the dark? It’s just another item on the list of things he wonders about you ever since the incident with the neighborhood cat.

Jimin had gone about a year without a neighbor on the right side of his house. He partly attributes this to why he’s interested in you, but he can’t deny he also finds you cute. But neither of those things makes him as curious as what happened. As much as he’d like to waltz over to your door and invite you over (or, if you were so inclined, be invited in by you) for a meal or  maybe some tea or coffee, the young man can already see the critical faces of his friends when they find out about such an interaction. They would shake their heads and remind him once again that he shouldn’t plan on getting close to you. He sighs. They’re too cautious.

You saw each other most days when one of you took out the trash or checked the mailbox and exchanged a few polite words. To talk to you properly just once isn’t risky, he assures himself. All he wants is to know more about you, about what might have caused the stray cat to freak out. Besides, living alone grows lonely and boring, and he has time to spare for one little interaction.

He finally moves away from his window, a look of interest and determination on his face as he shifts his gray curtain closed. ‘Until tomorrow’, he muses. 

[princee-ace1]

CH. 004 - Forgotten Friends

They say if you dream a thing more than once, it’s sure to come true. And I’ve seen him so many times.

Title: Bringing Back the Memories Series: Kingdom Hearts Pairing: You/Roxas, You/Sora

---

Sora.

Once upon a dream, you knew a Sora … at least, you think you did. The name’s been ringing nostalgia ever since Roxas mentioned it. All morning, you’ve been sitting in front of your bookshelf, going through albums and scrapbooks, and trying to figure out who he is.

Among the pile is your memory book -- a collection of photos you’ve taken of you and your friends on your adventures. Photos slide out between the pages, and you realize you’ve never had a chance to re-arrange them after finding the memory thief. With a sigh, you pick them up from the ground, and it’s only then that you notice most of your pictures are of Roxas.

Roxas doing a trick on his skateboard. Roxas falling asleep in class. Roxas hitting a bulls-eye on the dartboard in the Usual Spot. Your favorite, however, is a picture the two of you took together.

You broke your camera one day, and you were absolutely devastated when no one in town was able to fix it. Hayner, Pence, and Olette tried cheering you up, inviting you over to watch movies or play games with them. You didn’t know they were keeping you distracted while Roxas picked up several jobs to buy you the same model camera he found at a shop.

He showed up at the Usual Spot for the first time in a while and handed you a box. “Open it.”

“Roxas…” You almost cried -- or maybe, you actually did. He only laughed as he pulled you into a hug, practically smothering your face to his chest.

“You guys should take a picture together!” Olette suggested, grinning from ear to ear.

Pence nodded his head. “Yeah! Try it out, Haruna!”

You frown, disheartened when you can’t seem to find that particular photo anywhere. You’ve turned your entire bedroom upside-down trying to look for it. By far, it’s one of your favorite memories.

Other than yesterday, of course.

And it occurs to you that you and Roxas are … something now.

Butterflies are in your stomach. You suddenly want to see him. Has he already told everyone? What would your friends think? You haven’t even thought about what their reactions would be!

From your shelf, the glimmer of a yellow star-shaped charm catches your eye. A small, neatly-bounded trinket you often carry around with you for good luck.

As you exit your home, its magic already takes effect as Hayner runs toward you with a huge grin on his face. “Haruna! Great timing! I was just looking for you!”

“Oh? What’s up?”

“Today’s the day we hit the beach!” he announces excitedly. “And don’t sweat it about the munny. I told my uncle what happened yesterday, and he gave me enough to cover what we lost.”

“Whoa! Really?”

“I left a note at the Usual Spot,” he continues, jogging in place as he waves goodbye. “Go find the others and tell them to meet me at the station! I’ll go get our tickets!”

-*-

“What’s your name, child?” an older man with black hair and white robes asks as he kneels down to your eye-level. The scar and stern look on his face is intimidating, yet there’s a gentleness in his voice when he speaks to you.

His apprentices immediately took you to him as soon as they found you. Shyly, you answer, “My name’s Haruna.”

“Haruna,” he repeats, the curiosity in his eyes unwavering. “Do you remember how you came to this world?”

You shake your head. He asks if you remember the world you came from, but you don’t know the answer to that either. All you recall is a big clock tower and pretty skies, which doesn’t tell them much. With a sigh, he stands and looks at his apprentices for insight.

“She just … fell from the sky,” a tall, muscular young man with brown hair and blue eyes states in awe, as if he can’t quite believe it himself.

“You feel it too, don’t you Master?” the blue-haired woman inquires.

He nods his head. “Yes, a great power lies within her. It’s a matter I must discuss with the other Masters. Until then, can I entrust you three to look after her?”

“Of course,” the woman answers without hesitation.

“What about our exam?” The brown-haired male crosses his arms as he looks at her. “You and I need to focus on our training.”

“Leave it to me!” the blond-haired boy pipes up. He throws you a grin and ruffles your hair. “It’ll be nice not to be treated like the baby anymore.”

The brown-haired male chuckles. “I wouldn’t hold my breath on that.”

Their Master smiles a bit. “Very well. Haruna is under your charge. Take care of her.”

But the boy is already squatting before you with a bright smile. “You hear that? From now on, you and I are gonna be best friends. Don’t forget it.”

-*-

The first people you run into are Pence and Olette. “Hey, Haruna. Olette’s dragging me to go shopping.”

“Do you want to come with us?”

“Not today. Hayner said we’re going to the beach!” You pass on the message and their eyes light up with excitement. As they ramble, their voices suddenly become … distant. Muffled. Your vision blurs, and you hear a loud piercing ringing…

“Are you okay?”

Just like that, everything’s back to normal. Your friends look at you worriedly.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I think.” You frown, wondering what’s been going on with you these past couple of days. “Have you guys seen Roxas?”

“Not since yesterday,” Pence answers, tilting his head. Again, he asks if you’re okay, but you don’t answer him.

From the corner of your eye, you see him. A man in a black coat. He must be that pick-pocketer Roxas was telling you guys about!

“Wait, Haruna, where are you going?”

“Sorry, I have to go!” Without much of an explanation, you turn your back to your friends and chase after the hooded man.

-*-

True to his word, you and the boy with the dandelion-colored hair become quite close. Everywhere he goes, you follow; and he makes sure you’re never too far from his sight. He’s protective and playful, and gives you the same unconditional love and care the others had given him.

“I’ve never had a family before,” he confesses, plucking the grass as the two of you watch his older companions spar against each other. He picks a yellow dandelion and sticks it in your hair. “My friends are important to me, and I’d do anything to protect them. They’re my family, and now, you are too.”

More often than not, you and the boy would accompany the other two while they work hard on their training. From the sidelines, you watch in awe when the blue-haired woman gracefully casts incredible spells that color the air or when the brown-haired man swings his weapon with a force that shakes the ground.

The first time you’re able to manifest your powers was when you mimicked them during their practice, and a burst of light and darkness knocked you off your feet. It startled all of them when they discovered you’re able to summon raw energies of the two forces at command.

“I think we should teach her how to fight,” the young man brings up a couple days later. He eyes his companion’s reaction. “Do you disagree?”

“Well, no, but…” the blue-haired woman pauses. “Isn’t she too young?”

“To protect herself? You saw it yourself, Aqua. There’s something special about her. Chances are, we won’t be the only ones who sees it. Wherever she got her powers, there are people who will want it for themselves, and we won’t always be there to defend her.”

Aqua sighs. “You have a point there, Terra.”

A week later, Terra presents you with a small, wooden sword -- one he made himself. “A weapon isn’t used to harm people, but to protect yourself and those you cherish. Practice, discipline, and trust the strength of your heart. One day, you’ll be strong enough to do that.”

With wooden sword at hand, it serves as a focal point to harness those powers, which luckily only comes in seldom bursts. It scares you, knowing something so powerful comes from you; it scares the others a bit too. But it motivates them to teach you how to control and conceal them.

“The Master once told me magic is born from the heart,” Aqua tells you one night as she tucks you in bed. “When the time’s right, you just need to look inside yourself and you’ll find it there -- a ray of light, a goal, hope.“ She laughs softly and runs her fingers through your hair. “It might not make sense to you now, but one day, you’ll discover beautiful, wonderful things to hold dear. Magical and all.”

When you’re not with the trio, you’re with Master Eraqus.

After his meeting with the other Masters, it’s been decided you’ll stay under his care until they find your home. He raises you like one of his students -- kind, but firm with lessons of how the Light always overcomes the Darkness.

“A great power lies within you,” he reminds you as he finishes reading you a story in his study. “It can easily fall into the wrong hands if you’re not careful. People may come after you, but you have to be brave. And always remember, where there is Darkness, there will always be Light.”

-*-

You lose sight of him when you reach Station Heights. It feels eerie seeing the plaza completely empty; the stillness of it all makes you wonder if time is frozen again. Then, you hear the sound of footsteps approach you.

Turning around, you see the hooded man you’ve been chasing. Between the stolen photos and your hard-earned munny, you’re certain he’s the one responsible for all the theft in town.

Standing your ground, you demand, “Who are you? Why do you keep taking our stuff?”

“Me? Heh, you must have the wrong guy. I just got here.”

There’s more than one? Your frown deepens. “Then … who are you?”

“Don’t tell me you forgot already.” He shakes his head and sighs. Slowly, he pulls down his hood and reveals his face. “It’s me, Axel. Got it memorized?”

You squint. “What do you mean ‘forgot’? I’ve never seen you before in my life.”

“You sure know how to hit ‘em where it hurts, kid,” Axel mutters in disdain. “In any case, it wasn’t easy tracking you down. That guy sure hid you two well in this place. Even I have to admit, it’s impressive.”

“What’re you talking about?” you ask, clearly confused. He stops looking around and sighs again.

“You know, it doesn’t matter.” He holds his hand toward you. “Come with me, Haruna. Let’s get you out of here before they find us.”

“No, I want to know what’s going on,” you protest, refusing to cooperate with anyone until you know what’s happening to your town. “Are you the one making everything so weird?”

“I’m not. The person responsible for that is keeping you and Roxas trapped here. I’m in charge of breaking you guys out.” He peers at you curiously and asks, “Don’t tell me you haven’t realized this is all a ruse.”

A ruse? So … none of this is real?

He isn’t making any sense, but...

“Why should I go with you anyway?”

He rolls his eyes, getting impatient. “Because if you come with me, it’ll make my job a whole lot easier. Wherever you go, Roxas will always find his way back to you. Got it memorized?”

Your stomach twists when you remember what Pence mentioned after you found all the photos the memory thief took. They’re after the real Roxas after all!

“You must think I’m stupid. How can I trust you?”

“Hmm, well…” he pauses, his face unreadable. “We used to be friends, right?”

Before he could say anything else, the air in the plaza begins to warp around you. Another hooded person appears from behind him. He draws out a wing-like sword and Axel curses under his breath when he realizes he’s out of time. He summons red chakrams to each hand and faces the newcomer.

“Haruna.”

A voice calls from behind you, and when you turn around, you see a girl in white. She says something and suddenly, you feel incredibly drowsy. Struggling to keep yourself awake, you try to focus on the girl before you.

“I’m happy we got to meet one more time.”

The sad smile on her lips is the last thing you see before your world turns dark.

-*-

“Whoa! A meteor shower!” the boy with the dandelion hair exclaims as he presses his hands and nose against the bedroom window. His blue eyes twinkle in awe before he faces you. “Let’s check it out!”

He carries you in his arms with ease and runs outside. The night air makes you shiver and huddle closer to him as he feet quickly takes you two to an open field. It’s not until you gaze upward when you see what’s gotten him so excited. The stars in all its dazzling brightness is shooting across the sky!

You’ve never seen anything like it. And it terrifies you.

His laughter dies down when you cling onto him tightly and bury your face against his shoulder. “What’s wrong, Haruna?”

“They’ll hit us,” you answer in a small voice.

Realization strikes him and he sets you on your feet. He pulls out his key-shaped sword and vows, “Don’t worry. As long as I have this, I’ll always protect you!”

“Really?”

“If a shooting star comes this way,” he declares, swinging it around, “I’ll hit it right back to outer space! I’ll keep you safe no matter what.”

He keeps it up until you’re not afraid, and while he doesn’t actually hit anything, it’s comforting to watch him try. After a while, he collapses on the ground and closes his eyes, catching his breath. Footsteps quietly approach you two, and you see Aqua place a finger to her lips as she sneaks up on him.

“Whoa! Gimme a break, Aqua,” he yells when she successfully scares him.

Aqua laughs and pets his head, lightly scolding that he should’ve brought a blanket if he wanted to nap outside. Terra joins you three as you all sit on a ledge, talking about dreams and stars. His gaze is upward as he states every star up there is another world, and that their light is their hearts, shining down on you all.

A light looking down on you.

“It’s like you!” you tell the dandelion-haired boy, who looks bewildered. The others laugh and agree; to you, Terra, and Aqua, he’s your light.

“Oh yeah, Terra, you and I have our Mark of Mastery exam tomorrow.” Aqua stands and pulls something from her pockets. “I made us good luck charms.”

She tosses one to each boy, who easily catches them. “I get one too?”

“Of course. One for each of us,” she says and hands you a yellow one.  “Even Haruna.”

As you stare at the star-shaped charm, she tells you a story about a certain fruit that represents an unbreakable connection. So long as you and your friends carry this charm, nothing could ever drive you apart -- you’ll always find your way back to each other. No matter what.

-*-

Light. Darkness. Shooting stars. A sword, a charm, dandelions.

You slowly open your eyes and find yourself sleeping against Olette on the steps of the train station. She and Pence are sitting with you, watching over an icebox, some beach towels, and other items they wanted to bring for the trip.

“Hey, sleeping beauty’s awake,” Pence teases when he notices you stirring.

You hear the grogginess in your voice. “What … happened?”

“You told us to meet you at the station, remember?” Olette reminds you, resting her chin on her hand. “We’ve been waiting on Roxas and you fell asleep.”

“Are you sure you told him we’re meeting up?” Hayner impatiently questions, putting a pause to his pacing to stand in front you three.

Pence nods his head. “Yeah, we ran into him by the Usual Spot.”

“Then where is he?”

None of you could answer, and Olette starts to look worried. “Should we look for him?”

They look at you to decide, and you slowly nod your head, still feeling out of it. You don’t remember falling asleep … or anything that happened before you woke up.

Why does it feel like I’m forgetting something important?

Your friends take off to search for Roxas, but you linger behind. You pull out your good luck charm from your pocket, watching as the sun reflects off the yellow glass.

Ventus.

“Haruna, you coming?” Pence calls out. You tuck the charm away for now and run to catch up to him.

Once upon a dream, you knew a Ventus…

-*-

After searching around for a while, there’s still no sign of Roxas anywhere. Everyone’s starting to get worried. The last train to the beach definitely left by the time you decide to regroup at the station.

Deciding to cut through the Sandlot, you’re nearly run into Hayner. When you look over his shoulder, you see what caused him to stop in his tracks.

Roxas is there. While you were all worrying about him, it looks like he’s been sparring with Seifer and his gang.

“Hey, it’s you guys!” Seifer jeers when he spots you. “Come to play?”

From across the Sandlot, Roxas meets your gaze and your name falls from his lips. However, Hayner grabs your arm and pulls you away. “Let’s go.”

Pence and Olette exchange glances with each other and follow after you two as Roxas tries to catch up.

Wherever you go, Roxas will always find his way back to you.

Somehow, those words echo in your head. Where have you heard that before?

Hayner doesn’t let you go until you’re at the Usual Spot. He immediately digs through the icebox you planned to bring to the beach and pulls out a sea-salt ice cream. Pence and Olette take theirs too as Roxas enters, but Hayner pretends not to see him.

Pence sits in the corner and addresses the white elephant in the room. “So, you hung out with Seifer’s gang today?”

“N-No, it’s not like that. I just happened to run into them,” he assures you guys, but no one is buying it. He’s hiding something, but he redirects the question. “Oh yeah! How was the beach? Wasn’t that today?”

“We didn’t go,” Olette tells him. “It wouldn’t be the same without you, right?”

“Sorry…” He hangs his head, knowing he messed up. Hayner still wouldn’t even look at him, so he tries again. “Hey, what if we go tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow?” you echo.

Roxas nods his head. “Yeah! We could get those pretzels and--”

“I promise I’d be somewhere,” Hayner bluntly cuts in. It’s then Roxas remembers that the Struggle Tournament is tomorrow and you’re all going to compete. Having enough, Hayner jumps off the pipes and heads toward the exit. “I’m outta here.”

However, Roxas stands in front of him and clenches his fist. “What’s your problem? I … I really--”

“Roxas…?” you call out to him, but he doesn’t hear you.

“My head hurts,” he says after a minute and as he turns away, you catch a glimpse of sadness on his face. “I’m going home.”

Heavy silence follows after him, and for a moment, you could’ve sworn you saw him in a black coat.

-*-

The view from Station Height’s clock tower is one of the most magical, breathtaking things you’ve ever seen. As the setting sun warms your skin, a wave of nostalgia and tranquility fills you. And somehow, you knew you’d find Roxas here too.

Without a word, you take a seat next to him on the tower’s ledge and hand him the ice cream you grabbed from the icebox on your way to find him. He gauges your face for a moment, and when he realizes you’re not there to scold him, he takes your offering and mutters a barely audible thank you. A comfortable silence falls between you two before the breathtaking twilight.

“I’m sorry. I’m so stupid,” he says after a while, balancing the stick between his teeth. “I can’t believe I forgot that promise.”

“Hayner will get over it. He never stays mad for long,” you assure him, but it doesn’t stop him from beating himself up for ruining the day. You try to lighten the mood a bit. “Besides, if Hayner comes after you, I’ll protect you.”

He finally smiles a bit. “Yeah?”

“Hayner, Seifer, everyone else,” you list on and laugh. “Wouldn’t that be something to put in my memory book?”

“That reminds me,” he pulls something from his jacket and hands it to you, “I forgot to give this back to you.”

“Oh! I’ve been looking for this!” you exclaim, staring at the photo in surprise. It’s the very one the two of you took together after he bought your camera. “It’s my favorite picture of us.”

In the photo, your eyes are a bit watery and your face is a bit flushed, but there’s no doubt you’re genuinely happy. Roxas had his arm around you, still holding you close as he presses his cheek on top of your head.

He really does look happy.

Even now, there’s a fondness in his smile as he looks down at the picture. “It’s my favorite, too.”

As you look at him, seeing the way the dusk glows against his skin and colors his blond hair brown, you realize this is the first time you’ve really talked to him today. You feel your heart skipping a bit as you hand it back to him. “Then keep it. So that you’ll always have something to remember me by.”

He looks surprised. “Are you sure?”

“I made a promise, didn’t I? That I won’t forget.” You feel like you’ve heard these words before as you continue, “Nothing can drive us apart. We’ll always find our way back to each other. No matter what.”

“I doubt I’d forget you, Haruna. You’re too pretty not to remember,” Roxas suddenly says, catching you off guard. You realize that he’s been quietly admiring you too.

“I can’t tell if you’re teasing me.”

“I’m not. I mean it.”

“Flatter me all you want, Roxas. Just because I told you I like you doesn’t mean I’ll go easy on you tomorrow.”

You can’t help but smile at his laughter.

To be continued… ⇷ prev | luna ✩ tip jar ✩ ao3 | next ⇸

[nyaacatboy]

Fate’s Door, Chapter 9: Excuses For The Best Trip Of Your Life

Masterpost/Chapter 8/Chapter 10

Virgil and Logan approached finding a replacement for their roles at the bookstore together. After both going through potential candidates and discovering several mutual friends, they knocked on Elliot’s door. Elliot was just old enough for an apprenticeship, and they needed to do something to get over their boyfriend. Logan and Virgil had wanted to do something to help them for months, and Virgil knew firsthand that nothing was as distracting as learning the Dewey Decimal system and shelving books all day. Convincing them and convincing Dominic was pretty simple, and they were on their way in no time. Logan accompanied Virgil to her house, where she left a short note for her parents, poorly explaining the situation.

Patton requested emotional support for telling the caretakers that he would be away, and the other three obliged, slightly confused as to why he would need support. Once Virgil and Logan cleared up their situation, they set out for the orphanage.

Soon after the trio entered the door, they understood perfectly. Two caretakers marched up to Patton and demanded to know why “she” was so late.

Patton tensed up before answering, looking to Logan for support. Roman gave him a thumbs up, and Virgil nodded encouragingly. “On the topic of lateness, I think I’m going to take a vacation with my friends for a week and a half. I’ll be out of your hair, and you won’t have to see me for a while.”

“You have chores to do, and duties as an apprentice,” one caretaker scolded. “No way.”

“You won’t have to feed me or clothe me. Someone can take my room in the meantime,” Patton countered.

“Fine. Be out of here by dinner.”

The other three followed Patton to the rooms behind the entranceway. He had to say goodbye to the children, let them know he’d be gone for now. They were in the dormitories, and Patton left the other three at the door when he went in. Most children said they would miss him, and several gave him little tokens they swore were lucky or helpful in some other way. Patton pocketed them all, and promised to return them soon. Several of the children were feverish, and quite a few coughed in between breaths when they spoke to him. If only their little gifts had actual power.

“I had no idea,” Logan whispered to himself as he watched Patton talk with the kids. He’d known that Patton hated the orphanage, but he’d never understood why he stayed there until now. If Logan was king, he’d give more funding and better caretakers to these children.

After many tearful goodbyes, the four left the orphanage and started heading to the palace. When they reached the gates, everyone turned to Roman. How were they going to get away from the palace?

“Why are you all looking at me?” Roman asked, “Am I that beautiful or…?”

“No,” Virgil said, “I’m just wondering how you’re planning on getting out of your princely things and whatnot.”

There was a long, pregnant pause from Roman. Then, he spoke. “I’m not going to get out of the palace if I ask to leave. We just need to get in, get supplies, get out. I have lists.”

“Fine, but you better give us an explanation as to why the second most powerful person in Straith can’t get out of his own castle to go on vacation,” Patton said, starting towards the castle. Virgil, Logan, and Roman followed suit.

While Roman didn’t offer up any sort of explanation for their behavior. they had not been kidding when they said they had written lists. The four split up to get everything necessary, Patton and Logan following Roman and Virgil’s directions to the separate wings of the castle. Roman gathered supplies they’d laid out already in their room. With slight hesitation, they packed the red scarf. Virgil was nearby, but she was getting food in the kitchens. The four regrouped in Roman’s quarters to pack everything into backpacks properly, then headed out.

There were secret passages leading all around the castle, originally designed for servants, but long forgotten by all except Roman. They led the group through the network of narrow, often unlit, hallways. Eventually, the quartet was outside the castle, in between the castle walls and a tenement advertising room and board. Not a soul was around.

A long trek to Joan’s house began, since Roman couldn’t risk anyone guessing their identity out on the streets. They worked through alleyways and secret paths, following Roman’s map that they’d drawn up earlier.

In the beginning, no one spoke, but Logan broke the silence. “How long is this going to take? I was not prepared to walk a thousand miles today.” Truth be told, Logan hadn’t been mentally prepared for an adventure today. He still wasn’t quite sure about leaving Archdale.

“We’re three-quarters of the way there,” Roman said, taking a look at their map again. “And it’s two miles.” Unlike Logan, Roman had been aching to leave the capital city for years.

“Can we eat some food yet?” Patton asked, hand already rummaging inside the bag for sandwiches.

“No,” Virgil replied, “We didn’t plan for snacks.”

“Can’t I just have some of the vegetables?” Patton pulled out a bag of carrots.

“Sure, if you don’t want to have them later,” Roman replied, focused on the map.

Logan took a look at Roman’s map. “We can buy snacks after we get to Joan.” After a pause, he said, “Anyone want to do some team building activities? Since we’re on a quest together. I don’t want to fight with you guys.” His parents had always said team building was the most important thing for every group, and he’d probably done more than his fair share of them in this lifetime already. And he needed something to reassure him about going on this journey. But as he said it aloud, he realized how childish it sounded.

A smile broke out over Patton’s face. “What’s the nicest thing anyone here’s done?” He looked at Logan with a twinkle of mischief in his eyes. Logan’s embarrassment became a thing of the past.

“I saved a rabbit from being shot and eaten by hunters,” Roman offered, “Nice for the rabbit, but I was forbidden from hunting until I could be trusted to actually kill the animals.” As much as they were trying to not be the angsty teenage prince, Roman’s dramatic side cared more about the shock value of their statements. The dramatics won this battle.

“You saved a bunny?” Virgil was surprised, Roman had always seemed like the type to not really care about animals. She’d never really talked about it with them, and the topic had never came up in conversation.

“Yep. When I was ten. Virgil, what’s the nicest thing you’ve ever done?” They were eager to change the subject. It was a bit of a sore spot.

“I held the door open for someone because I didn’t know where to go once I got out of the store and I didn’t want to be rude. Logan?” Virgil did not consider herself a particularly nice person, a trait that was mostly out of necessity. Kindness did not keep a job in a competitive world.

“I read to children once a week. That’s the best I’ve got. Patton? I’m sure you’ve got oodles of good deeds to offer up.” Logan also volunteered at soup kitchens, did fundraising for various human rights organizations, and fostered puppies, but he didn’t really feel like elaborating on any of those topics. His parents had signed him up for most of them anyways.

“I took care of no less than 14 sick children in the dead of winter while I was sick,” Patton said quietly, “And I think we’re here.”

Roman had stopped before a small house with a welcome mat that read “The One and Joanly.” They knocked on the door.

“Roman! Thomas told me you’d be stopping by sometime soon.” Joan looked over at the other three with him. “You’ve got quite the road trip crew there. Come on in, I’ll get you some drinks and get the tickets. Fortunately for you all, there’s a train that runs directly to Midford, and another one that goes close to Dockerly from there. ” They led the four in, and starting getting drinks for everyone, then busied away to get the tickets.

The group sat for what seemed like a minute before Joan came back in. “Are we leaving for your quest thing or what? Train station’s a few blocks away.”

TAGS: @fanficptsd

[beatricethecat2]

if/then (2.0) - 15 v.2

PSA time: Criticism can be a positive force, especially when it’s constructive, and even more so when it’s given by someone you trust and respect. (Don't be afraid of it!) “But it’s just fan fiction,” the mantra goes, meaning fics don't warrant scrutiny, like "real" writing does. But “It’s just fan fiction,” to me, means I have the ability to go back and reassess, to learn from my mistakes, especially when given sound advice to guide me. I’m writing to learn, as I’m not a writer by trade, so there is no shame in tearing something apart and starting over again. Chapter 15 warranted a serious makeover, so I dove in...the gist is the same but the information imparted differently. I’d forgotten the cardinal rule of "show not tell,” so I’ve gone back and applied that liberally. And here we are, back at Chapter 15, with a (hopefully) more satisfying result. Plus, in the meantime, I’ve plotted out a much better ending (for the story), so it's a win/win situation all around. Edited 6/5.

Previously: part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, part 9, part 10, part 11, part 12, part 13, part 14

////////////////////

Myka checks her phone and looks toward the door again; no new news, but Helena really should be here by now. The VIP preview started at five, and her public opening at six, but now it's near seven, and Helena’s still missing in action. A mix up with her ticket left her stranded until late afternoon, but after some strong words with the manager, she transferred to another airline. She texted over an hour ago that she'd "be there soon," but Myka's beginning to worry she's run into further trouble.

It's almost laughable, her fretting over Helena’s absence, as she was adamant for weeks Helena not join her. But at the last minute, she changed her mind, unnerved about stepping into uncharted territory alone. Helena convinced her she needed a buffer and that she was the best candidate for the job.

After their initial conversation, Helena called like clockwork every day, but at first, Myka didn't pick up. Ignoring Helena entirely seemed the only way to focus, but her heartfelt messages kept creeping into her head. If she was ever going to move past this, they needed to talk, and sooner rather than later was better than waiting.

Their first few conversations were bitter affairs, little more than Helena listening while Myka listed her “wrongs.” Myka vented a laundry list of frustrations, beginning with Germany and tumbling back through their relationship. But over time, her hostility weakened, allowing Helena to steer their focus towards Myka’s show.

“What do you want,” Myka grumbled, tapping "accept" after three full rings.

“To ask how you're faring today,” Helena replied.

“Stressed out. Super busy. Same as yesterday, and the day before.”

“You have been rather agitated lately.”

“Who’s fault is that?” Myka snapped. It had become a habit to push Helena’s buttons whenever possible, but this schtick was getting old, her heart wasn’t in it as it was a few days ago.

“Were you able to ask for more time off work?”

“Yeah,” Myka answered, a little disappointed Helena didn’t offer her usual apologies. "Leena’s sending stuff I can work on at home, so I only have to go in once or twice a week.”

“Excellent. That relieves much of your burden.”

“True, but there’s still so much to do.”

“Talk me through it. Perhaps I can assist.”

Myka looked across her room at the collection of objects on her desk, the ones she and Abigail rescued from Helena’s apartment. She hadn't told Helena what had happened there yet as she wanted to process her experiences there before inserting Helena's influence. But considering the subject matter, that was kind of counterproductive as she wouldn't be able to keep it from her for long.

“Why didn’t you tell me they were gutting your building?” she asked.

“Are they? I wasn't aware.”

“I think you knew.”

“I’d only heard rumblings. Nothing substantial. Certainly, nothing this soon."

Myka grunted in disapproval. "You couldn't have mentioned it was a possibility?"

"Discussing such destruction seemed cruel after all you’d been through. And I didn't want to alarm Christina.”

When Helena got kicked out, Myka was still a mess, so she could see where Helena was going with that. But Christina was going to find out eventually, whether while walking to the park or from a friend at school. Though she didn't mention it either the last time she saw Christina, probably for the same reasons Helena had kept it from her.

Standing from her stool, she walked across the room towards the group of objects littering the table. She fingered the frayed edge of a worn LP sleeve she dug out from the dumpster, one that once lived on a bottom shelf in Helena's living room with many others. They were visible from the couch while she was lying down, and she'd often wished they had a turntable to play them on. That couch provided so much comfort in those trying times, especially when Dewy would knead in circles and then curl up at her feet.

“I loved that apartment.”

“As did I.”

“Well, it’s gone. Ripped apart. The whole damn thing.”

“How do you—“

“Your couch was in a dumpster. We went inside. Took everything left of you we could carry.”

“We?”

“Me and Abigail."

“Oh. You and Abigail.”

The line quieted.

“Sorry, that was...” Harsh, Myka thought. But no harsher than finding her with Bonnie at the sale.

“A-And what treasures did you gather?” Helena asked, in soft, defeated tones.

“A, um...pen,” Myka said, describing the nearest thing to her. “From that Mexican place on Houston. The one with the soup Christina likes when she’s sick.”

“Pozole.”

“Yeah, that’s it."

“Then it's truly a souvenir worth saving,” Helena replied. Her words were polite but distant as if she was thinking about Christina being sick and her inability to comfort her. Myka wanted her to feel guilt, but over her, not her child. She looked around her collection for something less fraught.

“There’s that pom-pom Christina made at Brownies.” Dust fell to the table as Myka lifted an orange poof of yarn.

“The singular time we attended before she began kempo. It wasn’t for us.”

Myka drops the pom-pom and hones in on another item. “Shells from the beach you said were from Santa Cruz?”

“From our excursion after Claudia’s job interview at Apple. That was…an enlightening day.”

“Tell me more.”

“I shall, one day,” Helena answered. “But it wasn't terribly pleasant.”

“Oh, sorry." Myka searches her collection for something with a cheerier backstory.

“I’m touched you felt compelled to save these trinkets, but I must ask, whatever for?”

“They’re lost memories, like mine, from the fire, and I’m painting them for my show. Or at least trying to, but I’m running out of time.”

“Ah, yes! That makes perfect sense."

“It does? How?"

“Thus far, you’ve been piecing together memories, painstakingly recreating objects you’ve lost. But there’s a distance there as if you're compiling a catalog, much like the registrar you’ve trained to be."

“They’re more than cataloging—"

"But the objects from my flat are extant, and your renderings draw directly from their energy. Mixing our memories with your own adds a richness, describing the limbo we're all experiencing while building our lives again.”

“I, um...” Myka looked toward her easel, at the rendering of the calendar she rescued from the floor displayed there. Various events from that month flashed through her mind, and she realized the amount of baggage she was memorializing. Helena’s interpretation of her motives suddenly made sense, though unpacking them at the moment seemed too intense.

“Can you work on multiple paintings using artificial light?” Helena asked.

“I have been, and it helps. But I need to ship everything at least a week and a half in advance.”

“Ship many as you're able and take the rest with you on the plane.”

“Can I do that?”

“Yes. If you're still using wooden panels, they're not weighty. Pack them securely and pay the excess baggage fee,” Helena explained. “Buy them pre-primed to save time in the studio.”

“I like preparing them myself.”

“You must focus on content. Hire someone to prepare them for you, if that’s critical."

“You’re probably right.” Myka sighed.

“You're allowing too many distractions to get in your way.”

“Who’s fault is that?” Myka said, her bite from earlier gone.

“I’ll refrain from phoning if—“

“No. Call. I might not pick up, but this was...helpful." It was, but everything wasn't sitting right just yet. "We’re still not ok. Ok? You know that."

“I’m acutely aware.”

“As long as you know.”

“My offer still stands, either way.”

“I’ll keep it in mind,” Myka said, then tapped end her phone. That was all the critique she could handle for the day.

Positive news also eased tensions between them, as early on, Mrs. Frederic's bid won the sale. The sizable commission allowed her to step away from the gallery, though she promised to help out when needed. And the residency in LA got in touch before her trip and informed her she made it through to the semi-finalist round.

But she needs to get through tonight before anything can truly move forward, a big art night in Warsaw all round. The city's museums and galleries have openings concurrently, and tonight's crowd has already has exceeded expectations. The director's been buzzing around all evening, introducing her to new faces left and right. By the time Helena arrives, all the activity's made her head spin, and she's starting to zone out.

She spies Helena weaving towards her mid-sentence, cornered by a woman asking detailed questions about technique.

“Forgive the intrusion, but I must steal the guest of honor,” Helena says and hooks her arm through Myka’s. She leads her back across the room towards the entrance, then steps back and sweeps her eyes over her outfit. “Lovely as ever. More captivating in person. Though I did appreciate the preview over the phone.”

Myka blinks a few times, a little stunned by Helena’s actually here. “Y-you look nice, too. You didn't say you were wearing a dress.”

“I’m hardly well put together, but I did try my best. This event is too important to arrive both late and unkempt."

Myka searches for traces of unkemptness, but Helena's close-fitting dress is wrinkle-free. It compliments her frame so perfectly, she finds it difficult to look away. When she meets Helena's gaze, Helena's eyes fill with apology, and Myka's soften, accepting the gesture without reproach. Her show wouldn’t have come together without Helena's help, and she’s glad she’s finally here to share it with her.

"I thought you'd be here earlier. Was there lots of traffic?” Myka asks.

"I stopped by my hotel to change.”

“It’s not that far.”

“Yours was booked. Mine’s further away.”

“Oh. I didn't—“ A patron squeezing between them cuts Myka short.

Helena turns to face a painting on the wall. “This one’s mesmerizing in person. Nothing like the photo you sent. Its surface seems holographic, but that can’t be right.”

“I added mica powder to the pigment, to create a shine.”

“Myka power?” Helena quips, raising a brow.

“Very funny. You know what I mean. Christina said it should be shiny, like the sticker.”

“She is you’re harshest critic.”

“At times,” Myka says, with a smirk. “It is her sticker.”

“But the rendering is yours. And the sentiment an ode to childhood obsessions."

“It's about the resilience of materials in the harshest conditions,” Myka snaps, repeating the line she’s used all day. "But I guess it is a kid’s sticker, so...” She looks hard at the likeness of a curled and soiled Pegasus she created. Helena's interpretation wasn’t her intention, but she can see what she means.

“Have you repaired all the damage from your shipment?” Helena asks.

“Don’t get me started. I can’t believe the crappy repacking job they did."

“Manhandling must escalate the longer goods fester in Customs .”

“If they’d been held up anywhere but London, I don’t know what I would have done. Thank you again for convincing me to ask for Mrs. Frederic's help.”

“In my opinion, the paperwork error was inconsequential. They should never have been held back in the first place.”

“That’s what happens when I don’t double check things—"

“Myka, come and meet Priska," a woman interrupts. She places a hand on Myka’s shoulder and glances at Helena. “Ah, this must be the long-lost Helena. Welcome!"

“I’m pleased to have finally arrived,” Helena says, holding out a hand to shake. "You must be Eva, the director. Very nice to meet you,”

“Likewise,” Eva says, accepting the gesture. "I've heard much about you.”

“All good I hope.”

Eva smiles and looks across the gallery. “Come, talk with Priska. She’s intrigued by the calendar piece."

“There's a lot to be said, isn’t there?”

As they walk across the room, the mischievous look in Helena's eye leaves Myka wary of what "a lot" entails.

Helena shifts into dealer mode as they meet with Eva’s client, her charm on high as they check in with various guests. Myka chimes in when Helena's interpretations don’t line up with her own, but after their umpteenth conversation, she’s happy to let Helena speak for her. Helena mostly gets things right, plus she’s wiped from repeating herself, and watching Helena work, in her favor, is still a turn on.

There's a dinner after the opening, then drinks after that and Myka's running on steam by the drinks portion. Helena stays ever by her side, chatting with guests, refilling her glass, ensuring she's having a good time. It's comforting having Helena there to care of her, as she'd been mostly holed up alone for weeks.

During a lull in socializing, Helena glances at Myka and smiles a smile she knows is just for her. She slips her arm around Myka's waist, and Myka instinctively leans towards her, smiling back with equal sentiment.

As the hours pass, and the wine takes hold, their touches become more intimate. At some point, Myka tunes out the room entirely, and her eyes hanging on Helena's lips. The way they lift and stretch to match her cadence and inflection makes her wish they were moving over her skin. She aches to kiss her, but not here, somewhere private, somewhere alone. She snaps out of it when she realizes that’s not out of the question.

She asks the time, it's late, an appropriate time to leave. They say their goodbyes, then pile into a car someone called for them. Myka gives the driver directions, and when Helena adds a second stop, her heart sinks; it no longer makes sense to have asked her to book a separate room. It was an easy way out if their evening went unfavorably, but she assumed they'd be in the same hotel.

“I can’t wait to pass out,” she says, slumping back into her seat. She closes her eyes as the car drives away.

“You deserve a rest. And you’ll sleep soundly knowing tonight was a great success.”

“It was, wasn't it?” Myka says. She cracks an eye open to peer at Helena and sees she's sitting stiffly, too far away. She slides a hand across the seat and lays it over Helena’s thigh. “I’m glad you came.”

“Thank you for allowing me,” Helena says. She covers Myka’s hand with her own.

The car turns at a light and Myka settles back, closing her eyes again, resting her head on the top of the seat. The car turns and slows after continuing on for several minutes. When it stops, Helena removes her hand.

“Come up with me,” Myka says and squeezes Helena’s thigh.

Helena looks down at Myka's hand but doesn't answer.

"If you want," Myka adds. Was Helena's doting all an act? She did offer her hotel address rather quickly. Maybe she misread her; maybe she wants to be alone.

“I’d be happy to,” Helena says, laying her hand over Myka’s again and smiling as she meets Myka’s eyes.

They exit the vehicle and walk straight through the lobby, directly into an open elevator. Myka presses a button, and as they move skywards, she steps back and examines Helena’s shimmery ensemble.

“Your dress reminds me of the one from our first ‘official’ date.”

“Do you reckon?” Helena glances down at her garment.

“The cut’s the same, but the color's different. Did you do that on purpose?”

“I may very well have,” Helena replies.

The door opens and they walk down a corridor then stop in front of Myka’s room. Myka slips her keycard into the slot and upon entering, sheds her jacket and bag, throwing both over the arm of a chair. She turns and faces Helena, who is standing a few paces away.

“Take your coat off," Myka says, motioning for Helena to come closer.

“We should talk,” Helena says, her tone weighty, beyond the current mood.

“I know, but...” Myka steps behind Helena and reaches over her shoulders, slipping her fingers underneath her lapels. She leans forward and angles her head, so her lips nearly touch Helena's ear. “Let's keep tonight about me.”

Myka tugs on Helena's lapels and Helena circles her arms back, allowing Myka to slip her coat off entirely. Myka throws the coat on top of her own, then pads in front of Helena and threads a finger under the strap of her dress.

“Maybe we can have a do-over,” Myka says, her eyes following her finger as it slides up towards Helena's collarbone then back down to where the strap meets Helena's generous neckline.

“A what?”

“A do-over. For our 'official' first date.” Myka angles her eyes up, meeting Helena's questioning gaze. "We are in a hotel, and you are wearing a dress.”

"So it seems,” Helena says, her eyes falling to Myka's lips. She leans forward for a kiss, but Myka dodges, grabbing her hand and pulling her toward the bed. As they reach the edge, Myka spins Helena around and taps on her shoulders so she falls into sitting position, Helena lays back and Myka crouches down, lifting Helena's foot, slipping off one heel and then another. She removes her own and drops both pairs to the floor while Helena shimmies up the bed until her head rests on a pillow. Myka crawls across the bed until her body is hovering over Helena’s and Helena adjusts so they're in perfect alignment.

“This is where we left off,” Myka says, dipping down for a kiss. Helena lifts her head, but Myka stops an inch short. “No, wait. You sit up and kiss me.” Myka settles back on her haunches and takes hold of Helena’s hands, placing them, palms down, above her knees.

Helena lifts slowly at the waist, palms skimming up Myka’s thighs as Myka cups Helena’s jaw and guides their lips together. Helena's thumbs slide inwards as they reach the hem of Myka's skirt, stretching eagerly towards tender, intimate flesh.

“Hey!” Myka yelps.

Helena freezes. “I thought we were continuing where we left off?”

“It was our first time, remember? You wouldn’t have moved that fast.”

“You haven't a clue what I would or would not have done.”

“Then tell me," Myka says, but kisses Helena her before she can answer, a strategic brush of Helena's thumbs impossible to ignore.

Helena rakes her hands up, over the curve of Myka's hips, and wraps her arms tightly around Myka's middle. Myka presses into Helena as Helena’s tongue parts her lips, the need for closer contact rushing through her like lightning. When they're forced to break for air, Helena places kisses across Myka’s cheek and lets her lips linger near her ear.

“Any flesh I’d longed to touch would have been unclothed immediately.” Helena reaches behind Myka’s shoulders and drags down her zipper. Myka leans back and lifts her arms, allowing Helena to peel her garment off entirely.

"I'd have mapped every arc and every crook; cataloged each utterance of pleasure I'd earned." Helena slides Myka’s bra strap over the slope of her shoulder and places a soft, lingering kiss on the rise of her breast.

“Wait," Myka says as painful memories trickle back. “If you wanted me so badly, why did you leave?”

“We’ve talked about this,” Helena says, laying her forehead on Myka's chest.

“But I still don’t understand,” Myka says, tipping Helena's head up, needing to see Helena's eyes as she answers.

“I thought tonight was to remain about you.”

“It was but…why were you so scared that night?”

“I’d only just learned I’d be deported.”

“That’s not it. Not enough for you to bolt. It was something else, something out of your control.”

“Myka...“

Myka sits back, distancing herself, brow furrowing as she replays the details of that evening. “You asked a lot of questions about Mrs. Frederic. But you already knew who she was, didn’t you?”

“Her reputation precedes her—“

“No, you knew her. You’d met her before. Were you working for her then?”

“I hadn’t met her until the day I was called into her office." Helena's eyes narrow and Myka shrinks back. She hit a nerve, as she did so often over the phone. “I think you're over-tired, and perhaps a bit tipsy,” Helena says, taking hold of Myka’s hands and drawing them towards her.

“I’m going to change,” Myka says, slipping her hands free and sliding off the bed. She walks towards the bathroom and after entering closes the door.

She leans on the counter and stares into the mirror, seeing what Helena saw. Her eyes are red and puffy, her hair fairly frazzled, but it's been a really, really long day, so she's not surprised. But maybe, just maybe, she's overreacting as she is both overworked and overtired.

She begins pulling out pins and thinking over the situation; was Helena spying on Macpherson for Mrs. Frederic all this time? And was Bonnie clued into the situation before now? Helena said Mrs. Frederic knew her, or rather knew Emily before London, but did she mean “knew of” or “knew her personally?” And if so, wouldn’t she have known the "other" Emily first? Unless she only knew "this" Emily, Helena's Emily, the one from the trial.

She yanks the last pin free and runs her fingers through, combing her hair out into rough, curled strands.

If Helena was telling the truth and she wasn’t Emily before their date, then it is possible, at dinner, she hadn't met Mrs. Frederic yet. So maybe she's jumping to conclusions, mixed up between Claudia's research and Helena's murky past. It is easy to fall into old patterns, so she probably should chill out until they can talk for real. They have a whole three days to hash things out, and it's best to do so with a clear head.

She brushes her teeth and gives her face a quick wash before swapping her clothes for a t-shirt and shorts. She hesitates before opening the door, how does she want to handle this? If things hadn’t gone sour so quickly, they’d be otherwise engaged right now. And she'd rather be doing that than confronting Helena. Maybe it's best to pass out and deal with it tomorrow.

When she opens the door, Helena's standing near the entrance, her coat and shoes already on.

“At least you didn’t sneak out this time.”

“I was certain you wouldn't want me to stay.”

“No, I do." Myka walks toward her suitcase and rummages through, pulling out a fresh t-shirt. “Here. Go change.”

Helena removes her coat and shoes then moves toward the bathroom, taking the t-shirt from Myka’s hand as she passes.

Once the door closes, Myka climbs onto the bed and burrows under the covers. She breathes deep breaths and closes her eyes, hoping to calm her nerves before Helena emerges.

Too few moments later, the bed dips down, and Helena sits motionless for what seems like an eternity. Myka doesn't move either, unsure of how to proceed, waiting for Helena to set the tone.

“Are you asleep?”

“No. Not yet."

“May I say something?”

“Sure."

“Our past may be irreparable, and our future...unpredictable. But our present is something we hold agency over.”

Myka rolls onto her side and bends her arm at the elbow, propping her head up with a hand. “How long did it take you to come up with that?"

"Since you first entered to bathroom."

"It's good. And I get it. You mean tonight is what we make it.”

“Yes,” Helena says. “You’d asked this evening be kept about you and I'd hoped you'd allow me to hold fast to that. You deserve a grand finish that only I can deliver. Let's end your successes on a high note."

“Selling yourself, instead of my paintings? Classy.” Myka huffs a short laugh.

“In a manner of speaking. Is that of any interest?"

"Kinda." Myka shrugs.

“Then I clearly misinterpreted your earlier intentions." Helena looks down at her hands.

“No, you didn't,” Myka says. “I'm interested. But it wouldn’t fix anything. And we’d still need to talk. A lot.”

“And we shall. Eminently.”

Myka slides her hand across the duvet and brushes a thumb over Helena's wrist. She may regret this tomorrow, but it is what she wants tonight.

Helena lifts her legs onto the bed and stretches out next to Myka, angling her body so they’re lying face to face. She cups Myka’s jaw and brushes a thumb over her cheek, looking into her eyes as if asking permission. Myka covers Helena’s hand and slides it over her lips, kissing it then laying it on the bed. She then eases Helena onto her back and straddles her hips, planting her hands on either side of her head. She dips down and kisses Helena as Helena's hands skim up her thighs, fingers sliding under Myka's hem with zero protests.

-TBC-

[eldaryanightmare]

I think we can give worst-event-award to the one we just had. I’m saying that as someone who was done with it few days ago, didn’t have to buy illustration fragments and had even 11 seconds left on that last game. So why would i complain it’s bad? Because it was!

First thing - “protect egg from spermatozoa”! Well yea, maybe it’s just polish version with players rotten to the core, but i kept seeing them calling it spermatozoon game. Oh no, spermatozoon shoot me! I can’t protect from three spermatozoa coming at me from different sides at once! 

Game wasn’t that difficult, you just needed to remember to look out for fastest… projectiles. And that shield is wide and you don’t need to desperately move it around when you can use side of it. But it could still freeze for you and then you would be totally screwed up with no hope. When it freeze they don’t move anymore, they TELEPORT and don’t even care if there is shield on their way. Event is supposed to be something fun, and while the way you look at “projectiles” could make this funny, the game itself was no fun. You needed to focus on it and in the end it was more like annoying chore that can be ruined with little distraction.

It’s good they gave possibility to get much more points than you need, but the choice of main source of them was horrible. The problem is that you are either good at it and get mostly 7 or 10 points, or you are so bad that getting even 3 points is rare. It could be a bit better if we could train or try it every six hours like regular mini games, and better score would add up to what you got earlier(like if you got 3 at first, but six hours later you got 7, then you would get 4 points added to previously gotten 3).

During event once i had a problem with heart game, because it showed me message that i lost before i could even start a game(it appeared right away on top of rules, what a bad insect), so i send a support ticket, they said it was reported higher, then i asked if they plan any compensations because i am totally pro in that game(doing it under 15 seconds) and this bug literally ate 3 outfit parts and then…. Ticket mysteriously went missing XD ….ok, i still ended early, but that wasn’t helpful.

The last minigame was also easy for me. But i’ve seen a ton of users who couldn’t deal with it, paying gold just to lose one more time, asking people to do it for them. If we had option of sharing account with friends that would let them just do daily things i would totally do this game for anyone in need. But when option is sharing password, not everyone wants to risk their account, right?

As for outfits…  while i like some parts, some other will probably end up getting deleted from my wardrobe with CSS. Bless you CSS, you save me from getting lost between clothes.

And illustration! Not everyone realized that - your pet luck doesn’t matter here. What needed to be done was taking pet with most energy and sending it to locations eating 10 energy. While you can get fragments anywhere, more explorations - more chances to get it. The way they made getting illustration makes it pretty frustrating. They could at least make last days have higher chance of getting illustration parts.

Do you remember easter with sending eggs? I king of liked it. If it wasn’t so bugged and other that getting eggs from exploration we could somehow make them i would really enjoy it. Let me send chocolates next year. For like 3 day. Two weeks of valentines day is way too long.

[imagineyourstars]

Since is Midori's and Adonis's birthday, can I request a scenario where s/o bought Midori's favorite plush toy and Adonis's favorite Anpan as a gift and tries to make a birthday cake but actually got caught by both of them. I know I posted a request before this but I would really like to see more of the birthday scenarios more! Lastly I would like to thank you for your good works up until now Mod Mademoiselle!

college has been really hectic these days and ?? i forgot i’ve been done with this request for a while ?? so here you have it ! it’s hopelessly late, but Midori and Adonis deserve their own birthday fluff !! (also thank you very much for the nice words ! nothing fuels motivation more than lovely comments like these ♥) - mod mademoiselle

Birthdays are terrible.

One of them is usually enough suffering.But when you have to care for thirty idol boys single-handedly, something as mundane as a birthday can quickly become an absolute nightmare. Especially when you have two of them onthe very same day.

You’d been running left and rightsince early in the morning, but you wouldn’t let your enthusiasm die down. Notnow at least : you were still far from being done ! But, well, maybe youdeserved a little break…

You were up early that morning : youhad a mission to fulfill. You’djumped in the first train, pinpointing a famous shop on your phone’s GPS. Agood hour later, you were queuing in front of the store with as muchdetermination as you physically could without melting. You did wonder if you were going to even makeit to the inside of the shop, but you didn’t want to back down ! Especially notafter coming all the way here, train tickets are expensive as hell ! Buteventually your patience was rewarded, and you were finally handing the holygrail to the employee behind the cash register… !

It was a rare, ultra limited-editionplushie of Midori’s favorite mascot character. Needless to say, your walletsuffered a lot from it, but you came victorious ! You : 1. World : 0. Oh, butyour ordeals weren’t over yet.

Now that you’d taken the train backhome, you were touring the sweets shops all around town, trying to rememberwhich one Adonis liked. You’d figured you’d buy his favorite dessert,anpan, as a birthday gift for him, but you couldn’t just settle for randomanpan from wherever. No, you’d give himthe best anpan.

But, well, you couldn’t quiteremember which store was his favorite. This made it all much, much harder. Youabsorbed yourself in research for a while. That is, digging through obscure review websites to figure out which shop had the best anpan. Only once you had awinner did you go to the other end of town to buy it, bleeding another holethrough your wallet in the process. (Hey, is anpan even supposed to be thatexpensive ?)

It still wasn’t over yet. You’dthen gone home and armed yourself with gift wrapping and scissors. Did you knowwrapping a gift is surprisingly hard ? After three failed tries, you resignedyourself to go watch a tutorial video on Youtube. It kind of felt like adefeat, but at least your wrapping was decent after that. No one shouldcomplain with this. You even added a handmade greeting card on each. Wrappingphase : over. Now you’d just need to go back to Yumenosaki and make up anexcuse for why you weren’t there today. Easy peasy.

Except as soon as you set foot onthe school’s grounds, you realized something was horribly wrong. The cake.

You’d forgotten the cake.

Well, not that hard to fix this.You’d just go back in town, buy pretty cakes, have “Happy Birthday !” writtenon it in icing, and all should be well.

Yeah, that’s what you’d have done,if only Midori and Adonis weren’t making a beeline straight to you. What werethey even doing in the courtyard ? Why were they all alone ? Who ruined yourplans ?!

“Oh, it’s you… Do you know, maybe…why there’s no one who wants to talk to us… ?” Poor Midori looked like hepretty much wanted to die right then and there.

“It’s strange. They all go away andmake up excuses when we approach.” Even Adonis looked utterly lost. Just likeyou were. You had no idea why they were being ignored by everyone else, and tobe fair you had more urgent matters on hand. Seriously, why couldn’t someonedistract them at least long enough for you to fix your cake mistake ?!

“Uh, that’s…. strange…. Oh, Adonis,behind you !” Despite your best attempt at gasping in surprise, Adonis didn’tmove an inch. “A bunch of adorable puppies !” was what you added in a panic,and you definitely didn’t expect Adonis to make a literal 180 and to startsprinting immediately.

“Wait, senpai…. Don’t make me run…”Midori slowly followed him, dragging his feet on the ground. You jumped on theoccasion and ran in the opposite direction, sprinting to the cafeteria’skitchens. You needed to get some cake ready, and quick.

Fast forward thirty minutes or so,and you were gritting your teeth, whisking cream as fast as you could. It’sridiculously hard, too. Feels like muscle training, actually. A sudden cramphit, but you wouldn’t let it defeat you and kept whisking harder. You startedwondering if you should shout to channel your inner strength to whisk even harderwhen you heard sudden footsteps right out the door.

“Are you sure they’re here,Otogari-senpai… ? I didn’t even see them…” Oh shit. It was Midori’s voice.

“I saw them coming in here in ahurry. They almost crashed in the door.” Yeah, no doubt about it, it was thetwo of them. And you were nowhere near done with the cake. Why wouldn’t theyjust take the hint and let you work ?! You needed to figure something out, andquick.

The door was already slowly openingwhen you suddenly had an idea. “Uh, Midori ! D-Don’t come in !” A puzzledsilence answered your sudden warning, but at least the door stopped moving.

“… Um, why… ? Is there something Ishouldn’t see inside… ?” You were running out of time, so you just saidwhatever sprang to mind.

“Ghosts ! There are—oh my god thiskitchen is haunted !” To your surprise, the kitchen door suddenly closed andyou heard footsteps running away.

“Hey, Takamine-kun—” Adonis ended uprunning after him, which prompted a huge sigh of relief to leave your lips.Maybe you’d finally be able to focus on your cooking ! Now you had no excuse :you needed to get those cakes done as soon as humanly possible.

Forty minutes later, you werepondering about life and its cruelty. One of the two cakes you’d made turnedout just fine, but the other… Yeah, there was no way you could show that toanyone. But you couldn’t just give one of them a cake. And sharing one cake forthe two of them seemed stingy… You were only just starting to spread the icing on your onlyvalid cake when a sudden knock on the door made you jump in surprise, causing asplotch of icing to ruin the decoration.

“Hey… T-There may be ghosts but… canwe come in ? We know you’re inside, we saw you…” Midori’s voice somehow soundedeven more dejected than usual. You were trying to figure out another excuse,but when you heard even Adonis sounded disheartened, you gave up.

“I don’t understand. Everyone’savoiding us… It’s really lonely. Did we do something wrong ?” There was no wayyou’d just leave them be, so you gave up on your half-finished cake and youopened the door, a resigned smile on your lips.

“Midori, Adonis… Happy birthday.”Both boys just stood there, staring incredulously at the half done cake and thetwo gifts sitting on the table.

“So that means… they were not ignoring us…”Midori visibly didn’t know what to do with himself, and shyly looked away whenyou tried to meet his eyes.

“Yeah, we were just trying to get asurprise party going for the two of you…” Well, you guessed so, at least. There was no way Rei or Chiaki would have missed the occasion. “Sorry, we’ve been a bit mean withoutmeaning to. But, well, it’s not a surprise anymore”, you laughed. Adonis gentlyshook his head, scooping up a bit of the cream from the messed up,half-finished birthday cake. “Hey, Adonis, it’s not… !” Too late. He’d stuffedit in his mouth already, and you couldn’t help but freeze when he smiled.

“It’s delicious.” His smile was so warm you had to look away before your entire face catch on fire.Midori was looking at the cake too, eyes suddenly bright.

“I think it’s cute… It’s a bit uglyand still not done, but I can see you tried your best… I like it.” He quietlylaughed when your eyes widened the size of saucers. You definitely weren’texpecting compliments on that failure of a cake, and yet…

Before you could ponder aboutyour failures any more, Midori awkwardly moved towards you, arms shyly extended.It took you a while to register he may have been wanting a hug, and so yougently embraced him. Adonis was looking away already, but you smiled to him.

“You can join in too, Adonis. Isn’tit your birthday too ?” Adonis’ cheeks definitely got rosier, but he delicatelyembraced you too, leaning his chin against your temple. You just stayed therefor a while, basking in the moment and in the warmth of both boys, when youfelt lips pressing against your forehead.

“Thank you. I’m really happy.” Asecond pair shyly joined in, pecking your temple only lightly.

“Yes, thank you so much… I thinkthis may be the happiest day of my life…” Your smile got uncontrollably wider,and you opted to just hide in Midori’s chest, making him jump up a bit at thesudden contact.

You were the one who should thankthem for making your life so bright, not the reverse.