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Hi! Could I ask Lando with pregnant reader. Like maybe her getting dizzy bc of all the paparazzis and fans surrounding. Maybe angsty. Dunno if you'll like the idea, but I honestly love ur work soo much
Our little miracle - LN4
*:・゚ Summary/request: request by anon as you can read above this!
*:・゚ Word count: 1244
*:・゚ A/N: first of all I want to say sorry for not being so active lately! I’ve been busy with school and work, I didn’t had any time to write! Second I want to say thank you so much anon! I hope you like this story too! If not let me known!
masterlist / community / request
౨ৎ
The late morning sunlight filtered through the curtains, warming the bedroom and casting soft golden streaks on the walls. The gentle hum of the city outside was barely audible over the rhythmic sound of Lando’s breathing beside you. His arm was slung lazily over your waist, his warmth seeping into your skin like a comforting blanket.
You blinked sleepily, turning your head to look at him. His face was still soft with sleep, his hair a wild mess of curls that begged to be smoothed down. He looked so peaceful like this, so completely at ease, and it made your heart ache in the best way.
“Caught you staring,” he mumbled, his voice raspy as his lips curled into a sleepy grin.
“I wasn’t staring,” you lied, your cheeks heating up.
“Sure,” he teased, his eyes still closed. “You’ve been staring at me every morning for the past five years. It’s okay, I’m used to it.”
You rolled your eyes, but your smile gave you away. “Good morning, Lando.”
“Morning,” he said, finally opening his eyes. They were warm and bright, like pools of melted chocolate, and they crinkled at the corners as he smiled at you. “Guess what day it is?”
You blinked, still half-asleep. “Uh��� Saturday?”
“Baby shopping day,” he announced, his grin widening.
You couldn’t help but laugh at his enthusiasm. “You’re more excited about this than I am.”
“Of course I am!” he said, propping himself up on one elbow. “We’re picking out stuff for our baby. This is a big deal.”
It was a big deal. After months of trying—months of hope and heartbreak—you were finally here. Fourteen weeks pregnant, your little miracle growing inside you. It still didn’t feel real sometimes, like you were dreaming and could wake up at any moment.
“I still can’t believe this is happening,” you said softly, your hand resting on your small but growing bump.
“It’s happening,” Lando said, covering your hand with his. His eyes softened as he looked at you, his thumb brushing gently over your knuckles. “And I can’t wait to spoil both of you today.”
---
The car ride into the city was filled with laughter and teasing. Lando, as usual, couldn’t resist cracking jokes, trying to lighten the nerves you hadn’t even realized you were feeling.
“Okay, but hear me out,” he said, glancing at you with a mischievous grin. “What if we name the baby after a car? Like… Ferrari Norris. Or McLaren Norris. That’s got a nice ring to it, right?”
You rolled your eyes, laughing. “Absolutely not. Our child is not going to be named after a car brand.”
“Fine,” he said, pretending to pout. “But if they grow up to be a racer, I’m taking full credit for the inspiration.”
The boutique Lando had chosen was tucked away in a quieter part of the city, its window displays filled with pastel-colored baby clothes and wooden toys. The moment you stepped inside, you were greeted by the soft scent of lavender and the faint sound of a lullaby playing over the speakers.
Lando’s eyes lit up as he took in the rows of tiny clothes and baby accessories. “This is it,” he said, grabbing your hand. “This is where we find all the cool stuff.”
You spent the next hour wandering the store, debating over cribs and strollers, laughing as Lando tried to convince you that the baby absolutely needed a mini Formula 1 onesie.
“Come on,” he said, holding it up with a grin. “How cute would they look in this?”
“They’d look adorable,” you admitted, “but they’ll probably outgrow it in a month.”
“Worth it,” he said, tossing it into the shopping basket.
You couldn’t help but smile at his enthusiasm. Seeing him like this—so excited, so ready to dive headfirst into parenthood—made your heart swell with love.
---
By the time you left the store, the sun had climbed higher in the sky, and the streets were bustling with activity. Lando carried the shopping bags in one hand, his other arm wrapped protectively around your shoulders.
You didn’t notice the paparazzi at first.
It started with a few flashes, the sudden brightness making you blink. Then came the voices—shouting questions and calling Lando’s name.
“Lando! Over here!” “How’s the season going?” “Is it true you’re expecting?”
The crowd seemed to grow out of nowhere, fans and photographers swarming around you. The noise was overwhelming, a cacophony of voices and camera clicks that made your head spin.
“Lando,” you said softly, gripping his arm.
He turned to you immediately, his eyes scanning your face. “Hey, are you okay?”
You tried to nod, but the dizziness was already setting in. The flashes, the shouting, the crush of bodies—it was too much.
“I don’t feel…” Your voice trailed off as your vision blurred.
Lando didn’t hesitate. Dropping the shopping bags, he wrapped his arm around your waist, holding you steady. “Alright, that’s enough!” he snapped, his voice sharp and commanding. “Back off! She’s pregnant. Give her some space!”
The crowd faltered, the realization rippling through them. But Lando didn’t wait for them to comply. He guided you away from the chaos, his body shielding yours as he led you down a quieter side street.
“Breathe, love,” he said softly, stopping to face you. His hands cupped your cheeks, his thumbs brushing away the tears that had started to fall. “In and out. I’ve got you.”
You nodded, focusing on his voice, his touch. The dizziness slowly faded, replaced by the steady rhythm of his heartbeat under your palm.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered, guilt creeping in. “I ruined our day.”
“Don’t you dare apologize,” Lando said, his tone gentle but firm. “You and the baby come first. Always.”
You managed a weak smile. “Even over baby sneakers?”
“Even over baby sneakers,” he said, grinning. “But just barely.”
---
Back at home, the chaos of the day felt like a distant memory. Lando had insisted on ordering takeout, claiming that you deserved to be spoiled after the ordeal.
As you sat on the couch, surrounded by the shopping bags you’d managed to bring home, you couldn’t help but feel a sense of peace. Lando was in the kitchen, humming softly as he poured you a glass of water.
“Here you go,” he said, handing it to you before sitting down beside you. His hand immediately found its way to your stomach, resting there gently.
“You okay?” he asked, his voice soft.
“I’m okay,” you said, covering his hand with yours. “Thanks to you.”
He smiled, leaning in to press a kiss to your temple. “I can’t wait to meet them,” he said quietly, his voice filled with wonder.
“Me too,” you whispered, leaning into him.
For a while, the two of you sat in comfortable silence, the only sounds the faint hum of the city outside and the occasional rustle of the shopping bags.
“You know,” Lando said after a moment, “I meant what I said earlier. You and the baby come first. Always.”
You turned to look at him, your heart swelling with love. “I know,” you said. “And I love you for it.”
“I love you too,” he said, his eyes shining with emotion. “More than anything.”
As the sun dipped below the horizon, casting the room in a warm, golden glow, you realized that no matter what challenges lay ahead, you and Lando would face them together.
And that was all that mattered.
౨ৎ
*:・゚ Notes; thank you for reading, love’s! Hope you all enjoyed it! If there is something wrong or need to be edited, let me know!
*:・゚tags; @gridprincess-04 , @justaf1girl
#lando norris#formula 1#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 x you#formula one x reader#formula one x you#lando norris fanfic#lando norris x reader#lando x y/n#lando norris imagine#lando x you#lando x reader#lando imagine#lando norris fluff#lando norris fic#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norizz#lando nowins#formula one#f1 fluff#fluff#f1 x female reader#f1 x y/n#f1#formula racing#pregnant
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fitting | chris sturniolo
— CONTENTS: handjob (m receiving); mommy kink; milf!reader; virgin!chris; sub!chris
— NOTES: hi my loves! sorry i’ve been a little m.i.a, some stuff happening at home and not really in my best mood BUT i’m here! you give me strenght to keep going and doing what i love. did you guys miss him as much as i did :( chris my beloved!!! inspired by this blurb, thought i’d show how shy chris was before their first time! — btw this fic is part of the milf!au but you can it on its own! — not proofread, i apologize for any mistakes. enjoy ♡
walking around the mall after a busy morning at work, you spotted a familiar figure across the alley. it was quite impossible not to recognize chris — his long hair falling over his big eyes, wearing his shabby jeans and his old converse as he typed frantically on his phone, oblivious to his surroundings.
you approached him slowly, standing in front of chris and expecting that he’d notice you soon. when he raised his head, a smile spread from ear to ear, his blue orbs sparkling. it had been over two weeks since you last saw each other due to stacy staying at her father's place, therefore, chris had no excuses to visit you.
“chris? what are you doing here?” you asked in your usual sweet tone. he scratched the back of his head, as if he was a bit embarrassed about the situation he found himself in. “huh... actually, i was supposed to meet stacy” chris admitted, tucking his cell phone back into his pocket and standing up beside you.
“but she won’t make it” he said. a puzzled frown appeared on your face. it’s true that you couldn’t always keep track of your daughter’s schedule when she wasn't at home, but she wasn’t the type to miss dates or hangouts.
“cheer practice” he explained. you nodded, realizing that the game season was about to start. it felt so wonderful to see chris again. “well, would you like a ride home? i just have to look for something real quick and then i’m all done”
“sure, c-can i keep you company?” he asked, eager for a positive answer. “absolutely, sweetheart”
you led the way to the store you were going to visit. a lingerie shop. chris gulped when he saw the bright sign, the pink lights contrasting with the black interior and then sighed. he knew you missed him just as much.
“that’s not fair, mama” he mumbled after a while. chris had been following you like a puppy, interlocking his index with two of your fingers, as if he could lose his way at any second.
“making me so needy” he complained again. you stopped by a red, lace lingerie set and happily brought it to your chest, turning to chris. “what do you think of this one, chris? pretty, right?”
“mhm— really pretty” chris shook his head as he sunk his teeth on his bottom lip. he looked away from you and the way the bra rested perfectly against your chest. “what’s up, baby? are you having a little trouble down there?”
“mama… don’t do this to me” chris whispered. his hands started to get sweaty and he could feel the blood rushing to his cock. he was about to get hard in public just because he thought of you in lingerie, which was ridiculous, since he had seem you naked previosusly.
“i’m not doing anything, sweetie. i’m shopping and you’re keeping me company, isn’t that right? is it my fault that you can’t hold yourself back and got all worked up just because i got some lingerie?” your warm tone sent a shiver down his spine, his chest immediatly inflating with air. “‘m s-sorry i just keep thinking… of you wearing it” chris tried to explain himself as you chuckled, enjoying his embarassement.
“yeah? you wanna see me wearing a nice set for you? which one do you like better?” you asked, handing him three pairs of bras and panties in different colors.
“the red one” chris spoke, still not daring to look at you in the ways. you walked in slow, seductive steps towards him, the sound of your heels taking over the empty store.
“c’mere, i’ll try it on for you” you continued, undoing the first button of your silk shirt. chris got a peek of your bra, it was the leopard print that drove him insane and made him kiss you for the first time, months ago. “but first we gotta fix this, hm?” you cooed, placing your palm against his boner and applying some pressure to it.
once again, you led the way towards the fitting rooms. chris followed you obediently, holding a bunch of hangers. you gaze scanned the store and with a naughty grin, you opened one of the curtains and quickly went inside, pulling chris by his wrist.
he didn’t even had time to hang your underwear. you pushed him against the mirror, smashing your lips together in a desperate, hungry kiss. a loud groan left his throat as you moved to his neck, gently sucking on his skin. “mommy i missed you so much” chris rolled his eyes, his hands going to your hair.
“i missed you too, my good little boy” you whispered, palming his cock over his jeans. chris squirmed against you, a moan slipping from his lips. you opened a satisfied smile as you pulled away, sitting on the stool next to the mirror.
chris whined in protest, already missing how you hand and your lips felt on him. “got all hard for mama? you poor little thing” he pouted, nodding “c’mon, touch yourself for me” you instructed him.
his eyes widened in surprise — you had never asked him that. he didn’t know how to do jerk himself properly. chris was a virgin and the first time he was actually able to reach an orgasm was with your help. how was he supposed to do it on his own, and in public?
“mhm, unless you wanna go out with that pathetic boner” you teased, crossing your legs. the red heel started to slip from your foot as you finished unbuttoning your shirt, fully displaying your bra. chris whined again, silently pleading.
“mama… i n-need your help” chris spoke under his breath. “can’t cum without you”
“you’ll have to learn how to take care of yourself, chris” you said, pulling chris by his belt. you helped him to undress, freeing his shaft, almost slapping against his own tummy. you wrapped your knuckles around his length, stroking it in slow motions. “do you expect mama to be there every time you get hard? what are you gonna do when i’m not around, hm?”
“nhng— can’t— can’t be without mama” chris whimpered, more to himself than to you. he twitched inside your fist, placing both hands on the mirror to hold his weight, knowing his knees would ultimately give up.
you moved your thumb to his tip, pre-cum leaking from his slit as you circled it. his hips bucked forward as he leaned his head down, trying to hold himself. chris didn’t want to cum too soon, it was humiliating. he wanted to last long for you, he wanted to get used to the feeling your fingers around him, to the sound of your voice whispering praises and calling him a good boy, but no matter how hard chris tried, he pathetically failed.
“cum! mama, cum!” chris whimpered. you tightened your grip around his cock, pumping it faster. “please!”
“cum for me baby” you allowed him. you knew chris would need a long time to get used to your touch. in fact, it was adorable that he couldn’t even last five minutes.
chris threw his head back, moaning as he came on your hand, thick spurt messing your fingers and his jacket. you didn’t move your hand, continuing to gently stroke his wet, sticky cock.
that’s until your phone rang. you reached for your bag, quickly picking it up and seeing the name on the screen. “i think stacy is back home” you told chris, whose dick immediately became soft at the mention of your daughter’s name. “would you like to join us for dinner?”
— TAGLIST ♡⊹𑄽୧ @thepubeburgler @submattenthusiast @pearlzier @mattsfavbitchhh @bugeyedgrl @sturncakez @riowritesitall @mattsturnswife @sturnsmia @sturnthepot @mattscoquette @conspiracy-ash @ilovemattsturn @lizzymacdonald06 @blahbel668 @fratbrochrisgf @sturnobsessedwh0re @cayleeuhithinknott @sturniolo04 @1c3b4th @mattsfavbigtitties @bellassturniolo @sturnsxplr-25 @ivammbb @shadowthesim @slutformatthewsturniolo @stefansring @teeheeomg @dystfopia @riasturns @faiyaz555 @sturnslutz @cvnntagious @alesturniolos @emely9274
chris masterlist | milf au masterlist
#christopher sturniolo#christopher sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo#chris sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo fanfic#chris sturniolo x reader#chris x reader#chris x y/n#chris x you#chris x milf!reader#sub!chris#maria writes chris#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo smut#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo imagine#sturniolo x reader#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#nick sturniolo
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What your favorite TWST character says about you :)
As a note before I begin: I saw one of these that shamed malleus and randomly even chenya enjoyers- (claimed that they were pick mes or something? 😭) so i wanted to make one that was more positive out of spite <3 make it more about the writing and why people appreciate the characters. Take each of these with a grain of salt i spose- also a lot of them share similar themes <3
(Aka fans who have different views or even blatantly incorrect views of characters will always exist everywhere, but insulting the entirety of a group solely for enjoying a character, many for different reasons, is probably not a great idea!
I get that sometimes people suck and thats understandable, but quit generalizing ok? Ok.
From a malleus enjoyer who just thinks hes a silly little guy and im tired of feeling like i have to defend myself bc he's my blorbo 😵💫)
Final note: i love unapologetically taking frustration and turning it into something that can make people smile 💕 also i blindly wrote this from 11pm-midnight :))) dividers by @/cafekitsune!
Heartslabyul:
Riddle: you enjoy and/or relate to the idea of healing from the past. Working hard to improve oneself for the ones around you and yourself: creating a healthier environment where you can be happy
Trey: there is immense complexity in things that are seemingly mundane. Digging deeper and deeper to find something truly sweet and heart warming is your joy.
Cater: maybe you relate, or maybe you used to, or maybe parts of the connections made in the past/presence/future dont feel as deep as you truly want them to be. There is something beautiful about a desire for genuine human connection, but also peace in being alone. There is a safe space for you yet, just be patient. 💕
Deuce: you love drive and determination. An endless stubbornness that keeps one going against all odds. Against every person who tells someone they cant. You watch them get proven wrong, and its pure bliss.
Ace: you find the connection between people beyond words heartwarming: even the seemingly simple ones. The ability to have a connection with someone who can get up to some mischief, tease back and forth, yet be there when you need them to be one of the most valuable things.
Savanaclaw:
Leona: Adversity over a lack of belief in oneself is a very difficult thing to overcome- yet it is very possible with the right crowd, the right amount of time, healing, and effort. You think someone's worth lies more than just within their title/job/appearance, but within the fact that they are able to stand back up and keep moving onward despite the odds. The hope for that change, and the ability to get out of bed in the morning on its own is strength.
Ruggie: Despite being through so much trauma at such a young age, recovery happens anyway. Its not perfect, at times the lessons learned are even rough. The survival tactics that once helped are now hard to ditch when theyre not needed anymore, but the ability to smile and joke and keep pushing onwards is something you value in life.
Jack: Self discipline can be both extremely useful as well as harmful in different ways. You find the way people can constantly strive to better themselves at what they love and/or morally to be highly admirable.
Octavinelle:
Azul: People can be cruel. And sometimes that cruelty inspires cruelty. Sometimes its simply used as a way to move on and survive insecurities created from it. Its hard, its a fight, but those insecurities are part of what make people beautiful. They are nothing to be ashamed of, and even the many tactics and smart ways of learning to overcome cruelness can be beautiful too.
Jade: The mind is extremely powerful. Intelligence and knowledge are not the only important things, no. Using that intel to find entertainment in the surrounding world can be exhilarating. Finding and discovering new unknowns: learning their ins and outs until they're a part of you is something you can relate to.
Floyd: speaking of fun- you love what is essentially the written version of a roller coaster. Ups and downs, ins and outs. Every single twist and turn is exhilarating and new. Every different perspective provides new insight into a multitude of different things. You are along for the ride, and you are having a lovely time.
Scarabia:
Jamil: self discovery can be very difficult after purposefully suppressing parts of one's self for a long time. Yet, the healing happens anyway (once again aha <3). People discover new parts of themselves, slowly becoming more comfortable not only with their environment, but how they react to it. The discovery is freedom, and freedom is bliss to you. New traits about oneself bloom like a flower: if not in the soil, then stubbornly in the cracks of cement. You gently take that bloom from the concrete and pot it, placing it gingerly in a beam of sunlight.
Kalim: Happiness isnt only sunshine to the one smiling, but to everyone else around them. It is delightfully infectious. However, happiness isnt a constant. You think emotions all emotions should be experienced rather than suppressed, because holding back sadness for the sake of others is a disservice to one's self. Discovering your own emotions, any range of them, is what makes people uniquely human. If anyone is holding those emotions back- hell, any part of them back, they need to be let out of the cage.
Pomefiore:
Vil: "Beauty is on the inside" is a saying thats been around for a long time, but beauty comes in so many forms. It can come from the stubborn desire to improve one's self: to be kinder, to help those around you, to be good. However it is impossible to be perfect. At times, for some, this can be crushing. People are hurt unintentionally, natural frustration can brew, the wrong actions can be taken: and thats okay. You believe whats important is to pick yourself up and keep going. To err is to be human, and that is beautiful too.
Rook: Error is beautiful. Symmetry is beautiful. Asymmetry is beautiful. A crack in the side walk is beautiful. Small things are beautiful, big things are beautiful. The nurturing of something through endless care is beautiful. The undeniable traits and hobbies of every individual that make them unique are beautiful. You find the endless optimism in finding beauty to be, in itself, beautiful.
Epel: Sometimes people will view others in ways that they wish not to be perceived as. This isnt in our control, as much as we sometimes want it to be. All you can do i be unapologetically yourself. To be you to the utmost degree. To prove those who thought otherwise to be foolish. You find this strength to find value in yourself despite others opinions admirable.
Ignihyde:
Idia: you have depression /j
Ok for real-
Life can be such a cunt. It can beat a person down, down, down and leave them vulnerable enough to fear it. To fear that beating, whenever it may next come. The anxiety of never knowing what or who will come next, or what one could lose. At times it feels more comforting to find a routine in solitude. But you know that the small things that give joy will wiggle their way in with time. The broken will meet people who love and care and find comfort in the companionship of healing, even from the little things: like a new story to read or game to play.
Ortho: You value unconditional support. Support through everything: the good, the bad, the just kind of okay. Knowing that someone can have ones back for every little thing- to be there solely because they care and wish the best for others- is something you look up to and maybe even wish to be for another.
Diasomnia:
Malleus: god damn people can be so hard to read and understand. They are so complicated: they are books you have to pay attention to from start to finish. But once you reach the end, you have a deep seated appreciation for them, and for the ones who stuck around to read your book too. Even if it was just for a fleeting moment: it is a happy moment. As painful as temporary things can be, it is also what you think can make the relationships we love and have loved so valuable.
Lilia: there can be suffering everywhere. There is war. There is famine. But there are also endless new sights to see. New discoveries to be made to help those still going through famine and war. New ways to love and understand people you never thought you'd understand. The development and positive parts of humanity, even though at times it can look bleak, are ever present to you. You love the discovery: of places and of people.
Silver: you believe that there is solace in being your own individual, regardless of who you are bound by blood to. Being shaped my experiences, friends, hardships, and new places are what make a person who they are. You value finding roots in and making your own home.
Sebek: Dedication can be a hard thing to come by, but when it does it can grab someone by the reigns. Using every waking moment to cherish that thing, learn more about it, become better at something, and strive to better ones self can be very admirable to you. But, on the other hand, it also calls for the occasional rest.
OTHER (just for ones I know well enough, sorry!)
Neige: You love kindness despite hardship. One can go through horrible things and still choose to be kind. The world could begin to end, and one could still choose to be kind, because it means everything.
Chenya: Curiosity fuels exploration. It fuels art. It fuels everything. It fuels excitement. It fuels friendships. It fuels medicine. It fuels life. Curiosity is endlessly fun, and you think that is very whimsical
Meleanor: Sacrifice for others can be tragic. Knowing what another person has given up for someone else, maybe even everything, is gut wrenching but undeniably a selfless love to you.
Crewel: There can be kindness in strictness. In teachings, there can be a parental guide. There can be someone who cares for you and undeniably wants you to succeed. They know that you can, so they push you towards it. You want this support.
Trein: Love surpasses time. When the ones we love are gone, the memories of them are still held close, with the love once given to them, we can show to others through advice and guidance that comes with time. You find comfort in that.
Crowley: People are flawed. We all know this, yet despite a persons flaws... however many there may be, there is still something hopeful and human about it. About having those flaws and persisting regardless. You may even like those flaws, and the unashamed desire to press on even with them on display.
Fellow/Ernesto: Live for yourself. This is what you desire. People are often caught up in material or monetary things. After all, we live in a world that required it to survive and even be respected. To throw away those views and simply live as you see fit: regardless as to whether you earn those things or not, is something you admire.
Rollo: Sometimes the attachment we have to those we lost can be painful. Regardless, that pain is proof that there was care and love. The things done for others, whether alive or dead, are done selflessly. Grief can fuel hatred, but it can also be caused by love. To unlearn hatred and learn to love again after the fear of loss is a natural human experience. It is a process you understand and admire those who take the time and strength needed to properly love again.
Thank you for reading <3
Tags <3
@lowcallyfruity @skriblee-ksk @justm3di0cr3 @cecilebutcher @kitwasnothere
@techno-danger @thehollowwriter @distant-velleity @the-trinket-witch @scint1llat3
@beneathsakurashade @qsoap @twsted-canvas @prince-kallisto @kathxrat-01
@sillyslipperybananapeel @jadelover69 @tixdixl @twstinginthewind
#boopshoopsramblings#boopshoopswriting#twisted wonderland#twst#disney twst#riddle rosehearts#trey clover#cater diamond#ace trappola#deuce spade#leona kingscholar#ruggie bucchi#jack howl#azul ashengrotto#jade leech#floyd leech#jamil viper#kalim al asim#vil schoenheit#rook hunt#epel felmier#idia shroud#ortho shroud#malleus draconia#lilia vanrouge#silver vanrouge#twst silver#sebek zigvolt#meleanor draconia#rollo flamme
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Birthday Wishes
Summary: LH44 + Birthday Wishes
Song: It's My Birthday · Will.i.am
Author’s note: Happy Birthday to my Black King, my idol and inspiration! Please like, reblog and share this! 🫶
Word count: 3.8k
The sprawling, modern house, perched on a cliff overlooking the Mediterranean, felt strangely quiet. It was a stark contrast to the roaring engines and frenetic energy of the Grand Prix circuits you were accustomed to seeing Lewis dominate.
Today, however, there was no racing. Today was his birthday, and you were here, a flutter of anticipation and nervous energy churning within you.
You had been looking forward to this for weeks, ever since he’d casually, almost as an afterthought, said, "You should come over for my birthday. Just a quiet one."
Just a quiet one, he'd said. As if anything involving Lewis Hamilton could ever be truly quiet.
You wandered into the living room, its floor-to-ceiling windows framing a breathtaking view of the sea. The sun was painting the water in shades of sapphire and gold, reflecting off the sleek, minimalist furniture.
A small table in the corner was laden with a variety of pastries – croissants, pain au chocolat, and a stack of what looked like homemade scones. A single vase held a vibrant bouquet of wildflowers, a thoughtful contrast to the polished perfection of the room.
"Beautiful place," you murmured to yourself, feeling slightly out of place in your casual jeans and linen shirt. You’d debated what to wear for hours, eventually settling on something that was comfortable yet still felt like you had put in the effort.
You desperately hoped he wouldn’t notice how much you had agonized over it.
A moment later, the sound of footsteps made you turn. Lewis stood in the doorway, his smile genuine and warm. He was wearing a simple white t-shirt and joggers, his hair slightly tousled, giving him a relaxed look that you found incredibly endearing.
"Hey," he said, his voice a little husky, "You made it."
"Wouldn't miss it," you replied, your heart doing that irritating little flutter-kick. You tried to sound casual, but you knew your cheeks were probably betraying you.
"Coffee?" He gestured towards the kitchen. "Or we can just dive into the pastries."
"Coffee would be great," you replied, following him. The kitchen was equally sleek and modern, with stainless steel appliances and a large island where he began brewing coffee.
You watched him, the way his hands moved with confidence and ease, and a familiar warmth spread through you. You'd spent so much time with him at races, surrounded by teams and media, that it was strangely intimate to see this side of him, the quiet, domestic side.
"So," he said, turning towards you as he poured the coffee, "What do you think? Is it…birthday-ish enough?"
You laughed, the sound echoing slightly in the large space. "Well, there are pastries, and flowers, and the absence of any car engines... I think you're definitely on the right track."
He handed you a mug, the steam swirling upwards, carrying with it the rich aroma of freshly brewed coffee. "Good," he said, his eyes meeting yours, and for a moment, you felt like you were the only two people in the world.
He broke the gaze first, turning back to the counter. "So what do we do today? Walk down to the beach? Take the boat out?"
"Whatever you'd like," you replied, your voice slightly breathless. The thought of spending the day with him, just the two of you, was enough to make butterflies dance in your stomach.
You spent the morning talking, sitting out on the balcony, the sun warming your skin. He spoke about his plans for the future, not just in racing, but his other passions: music, fashion, his love for animals.
He was so much more than just a Formula One driver, and you reveled in learning all these hidden depths. You, in turn, spoke about your life, your dreams, your anxieties.
You were surprised at how comfortable you felt, how easily the words flowed. It was like the wall you kept between yourself and the world had crumbled in his presence.
"I'm glad you're here," he said softly, his gaze on the ocean. "It's…nice. Different."
"Me too," you admitted, the words feeling like a confession. You wanted to tell him so much more, how you felt, how your heart had been inexplicably drawn to him.
But the words caught in your throat, fear holding them captive.
Later, you walked down to the beach, the soft sand warm beneath your feet. He kicked off his shoes and rolled up his trousers, and you followed suit.
The waves crashed onto the shore, the sound a soothing rhythm. As you walked, you found yourselves in comfortable silence, just enjoying the beauty around you.
Then, he surprised you. "Want to try?" he asked, pointing at a stand-up paddle board that was leaning against a nearby rock.
You hesitated, you had never tried before. "I'm not sure I’m very good at these things," you confessed.
He grinned, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "Don’t worry, I'll help you."
And he did. He was patient, his hands gentle as he guided you, his laughter warm as you wobbled and nearly fell. You spent the rest of the afternoon in the water, laughing and splashing each other, the tension you’d been carrying finally melting away.
By the time you returned to the house, you were both exhausted but exhilarated.
As dusk approached, you found yourselves back on the balcony. The sky was painted in brilliant hues of orange and purple, the air cooler now. You were sitting side-by-side, sipping wine, neither of you wanting the day to end.
"This was… amazing," you said, your voice low. "Thank you."
He turned to you, his gaze intense. "Thank you," he repeated, his voice softer now. "It's the best birthday I've had in a long time."
For a moment, you just stared at each other, the unspoken words hanging heavy in the air. You knew, deep down, that there was something special between you, something more than just friendship.
You had felt it all day, in the shared laughter, the comfortable silences, the warmth of his touch.
You took a deep breath, gathering your courage. "Lewis," you started, your voice barely a whisper, “I…”
But before you could finish, his phone buzzed loudly, breaking the spell. He sighed, picking it up. His face changed, his smile fading.
"Sorry," he said, his voice distracted. "Work call."
You watched him as he spoke to someone on the phone, his mood shifting completely. You knew that this was the reality of his life. The world of racing was demanding, always demanding.
It was a reminder that despite the intimacy you'd shared today, his world was vastly different from yours.
He hung up the phone a few minutes later, his expression apologetic. "Sorry about that," he said, "It was…urgent."
The moment was gone. The words you had been about to say felt foolish now, too vulnerable to be spoken in the face of the realities of his life. You forced a smile.
"No problem," you said, your voice much lighter than you felt. "Work is work."
He seemed to sense your shift in mood, the slight withdrawal. He reached out, his fingers brushing lightly against your arm.
"You okay?" he asked, his voice concerned.
You met his gaze, your heart aching with a mix of longing and resignation. You knew you couldn't keep your feelings bottled up forever.
You wanted to tell him everything, but the fear of rejection was always right there, holding you back.
"Yeah," you said finally, trying to sound convincing, but you knew he could see through the facade, "Just… a little tired. It's been a long day."
He nodded slowly, his expression thoughtful. "Yeah," he said, "It has been."
There was a beat of silence, heavy with unspoken words, before you both just went back to staring out at the fading light, the gentle sound of the waves washing over the beach.
You knew you had missed your window but you also knew with a certainty that this was not the last time, and maybe one day you would find the courage to tell him exactly how you felt.
But for now, you were content to just sit here, with him, in the quiet afterglow of the day, wanting more than anything for the night to never end.
The roar of the engines was a physical thing, vibrating through your chest and making your teeth hum. It was a sound you knew intimately, a sound that usually brought you a sense of exhilaration.
But here, in the Australia International Circuit paddock, standing amongst a sea of scarlet-clad Ferrari fans, it felt different. Foreign. Unsettling.
It was all because of him. Lewis.
Seeing him in red was a surreal experience. The sleek, aggressive lines of the Ferrari suit, emblazoned with the prancing horse, just didn't seem to belong to the man you knew.
Lewis Hamilton, the seven-time champion, the man who was synonymous with silver and black, was now a vibrant splash of crimson. The world was still reeling from the bombshell announcement.
A few months ago, it had been unfathomable. Now, here it was, the reality staring you in the face.
And you were here, a reluctant participant, forced to bear witness to this seismic shift in the Formula One landscape. You haven't seen Lewis since his birthday.
That night, fueled by too much champagne and a heart overflowing with something you couldn't quite define, you’d almost confessed your feelings.
It was a near-miss, a moment where the truth had hovered precariously on the tip of your tongue. The near-confession had scared you so badly that you'd become adept at dodging calls, making excuses about work, or simply, pretending to be busy.
You had convinced yourself that if you just kept enough distance, the feelings might fade. They didn't.
Today, however, distance was no longer an option. Lewis had called, his voice laced with a familiar charm, yet with an undertone of stubborn authority.
“You’re not going to leave me hanging on my first race, are you?” he'd asked, the question more of a statement. You'd tried to resist, even feigned a sore throat, but he had simply said, "I'll send a car."
And here you were, leaning against a barrier, trying to appear nonchalant amidst the chaos, while your heart hammered against your ribs like a trapped bird.
You watched as Lewis, a whirlwind of energy even before he entered the car, moved through the pit lane, exchanging quick words with his engineers. He looked incredible.
He’d always been handsome, but something about the Ferrari red seemed to amplify his presence, his confidence.
"Lost in thought?”
The deep, familiar voice sent a jolt through you. You turned, your breath catching in your throat. Lewis stood there, his race suit unzipped at the top, a bead of sweat tracing a path down his temple.
His eyes, those intense brown eyes you’d spent far too many nights dreaming about, were fixed on you with a playful glint.
"Just... taking it all in," you managed, your voice a little too breathy for your liking.
He chuckled, a low rumble that sent shivers down your spine. “I know, it’s a bit much, isn’t it? Even for me sometimes.” He gestured around at the bustling pit lane, a small smile playing on his lips.
"It's..." you paused, searching for the right word, "different."
"Different good, or different bad?" he teased, stepping closer. The scent of his aftershave, a mix of citrus and spice, filled your senses, making it even harder to think straight.
"Different… jarring," you admitted, your gaze darting down to the Ferrari logo on his suit. You weren't being intentionally cold, but it was the truth.
It wasn't about the car but about who was in it.
His smile faded slightly, a hint of disappointment flickering in his eyes. “Jarring?” he repeated, his voice softer now. "You don't like it?"
"It's not about the car, Lewis," you said, quickly lifting your gaze to meet his.
The air crackled between you two, a tangible tension that had been simmering for months, growing more intense in the claustrophobic confines of the pit lane.
"Then what is it about?" he asked, his voice barely a whisper. The noise of the paddock faded into background static. It felt like you were the only two people in the world.
You opened your mouth, wanting to say it, wanting to finally confess the feelings that had been eating you alive, but the words caught in your throat.
Instead, you muttered the first thing that came to mind, "It's just... new.”
He studied you for a long moment, his expression unreadable. Then, he sighed, running a hand through his braids, a gesture you knew so well.
“Well, new is good, right? Keeps things interesting. Besides," his eyes twinkled, “I look good in red, don’t I?”
He was doing it again, charming his way out of a serious conversation. You couldn’t help but smile. “You do,” you conceded, forcing a lightness into your voice. “Very… striking.”
“That’s what I like to hear,” he said, his smile returning full force.
“Now, I need to go get ready. But,” he leaned closer, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper, “I'll see you after the race, yeah?”
“Yeah,” you replied, your heart thumping against your ribs like a drum.
The roar of the crowd was a distant hum, a backdrop to the frantic energy within the Ferrari garage. You tried to focus on the data streaming across your screen – lap times, tire degradation, fuel consumption – but your eyes kept betraying you.
They kept drifting towards the track, towards the scarlet blur that was Lewis.
It was the first race of the season, his first in the iconic red of Ferrari, and the air crackled with a tension that both exhilarated and terrified you.
The red suit wasn’t just a new color; it was a visual manifestation of a new energy, a raw hunger that pulsed from him with every turn, every overtake.
He was a predator on the track, precise, powerful, and undeniably captivating. A strange mix of worry and pride swelled inside you as you watched him fight for position, pushing his car and himself to the absolute limit.
The race was a blur, a ballet of speed and strategy. You meticulously tracked his progress, biting your lip, heart pounding in your chest with every corner.
You tried to reason with yourself, telling yourself to focus on the data, on your job, but it was useless. You were mesmerized, completely and utterly consumed by the spectacle of Lewis Hamilton piloting a Ferrari.
When the checkered flag finally waved, the roar from the stands hit a crescendo. You saw it on the screen - Lewis, first across the line. A wave of relief washed over you so profound it made you dizzy.
You hadn’t realized how tightly wound you were until the tension finally snapped. You didn’t want to think about why watching him risk it all put you so on edge, you just accepted it as a part of who you were.
You found yourself drawn to the edge of the team garage, away from the frenetic celebrations unfolding between the mechanics and engineers. Your heart wouldn't be able to take it, not today.
You watched on the monitors as Lewis emerged from his car, a triumphant smile splitting his face as he was enveloped by his new team.
You saw the spray of champagne, the joyful leaps and shouts, the shared camaraderie. You desperately wanted to see him, to congratulate him, but you hung back, the familiar sting of your reserved nature keeping you rooted to the spot.
It felt like an eternity before the excitement began to die down, the celebrations slowly dispersing. You paced anxiously, hands twisting in your pockets, waiting for him to return.
You weren’t sure what you wanted to say. Congratulations felt inadequate, almost like an underselling of what you had just witnessed.
Finally, you saw him. He was still damp with champagne, his red racing suit clinging to him, making him look even more imposing than usual.
His braids was a mess, his eyes sparkling with the post-race adrenaline, and when he turned, you found yourself caught in his gaze.
You opened your mouth to speak, “Lewis-“
But before you could finish, he was there, his hand reaching for yours, his fingers wrapping around mine, sending a jolt of electricity through you.
It was a casual touch, yet it made your entire body sing.
He didn't say a word, but the pull in his hand was unmistakable, guiding you through the open door of his driver’s room, leaving you no choice but to follow, as if you were caught in his orbit.
The room was small, functional, but it felt like a haven compared to the vibrant chaos of the garage. He closed the door behind you, the sound a quiet click in the sudden silence.
His grip on your hand didn’t loosen, his thumb gently tracing your knuckles.
“Where were you before?” His voice was rough, a hint of disappointment lacing his tone.
The question caught you off guard, the intimacy of the question making your heart skip a beat.
You blinked, your mind scrambling to find an answer. "I- I was here," you stammered, your voice betraying your nerves.
"I didn't think… I didn't think you would want me there." You couldn't meet his eyes, your gaze fixed on your hands, still entwined.
He tilted his head, studying you, his eyes searching. "Of course, I wanted you there. I always want you there."
The words hung in the air, charged with an unspoken depth. You looked up at him, your breath catching in your throat.
His eyes, those incredible brown eyes that seemed to see right through you, were locked on yours.
“That was an incredible race, Lewis,” you whispered, the words barely audible.
They felt so inadequate, so clumsy, compared to the way he had just taken control of that race.
He smiled then, a slow, genuine smile that reached his eyes, and it was like the sun had broken through the clouds. It was a smile that was meant for you, and you only.
“It was, wasn’t it?” He squeezed your hand slightly. “But it would have been even better if you were closer.”
“I was in the pitlane,” you stated softly, your voice barely above a whisper, but the memory of him crossing the finish line, the sheer power and determination he radiated, still made your heartbeat erratic rhythms.
He chuckled, a low rumble that sent a shiver down your spine. “I mean to be there when I get out of the car, to be the first one I see,” he clarified, his gaze still locked on yours.
He wanted you there, front and centre, the first thing he sees after the adrenaline-fueled intensity of a race. It was a sentiment that sent a flutter of both hope and uncertainty through you.
“I don't think they'll let me stay in front for you,” you joked, trying to lighten the intimate atmosphere that had settled between you, the vulnerability in his expression making you feel a little overwhelmed.
You knew the protocol, the chaos that erupted after a race, the swarm of people who descended upon the winning driver. You couldn't possibly break that wall.
“I can make that arrangement,” Lewis stated seriously, his tone firm, the glint in his eyes unwavering.
He was so sure, so absolute, that for a moment you actually believed him. It was a ridiculous notion, but from him, it felt strangely plausible.
“Lewis…” you muttered, looking up at him, your eyes wide. His conviction was thrilling, but it was also terrifying.
He was raising your hopes too much, painting a picture of a reality that, you feared, could never be.
He moved closer, the distance between you shrinking until you could feel the warmth of his breath on your face. You were trapped between the intensity of the moment and the logical part of your brain telling you to walk away while you still could.
Despite the inner turmoil, you stood your ground, your heart thumping a frantic rhythm against your ribs.
“Did you know what my birthday wish was?” Lewis said, his voice softer now, laced with a hint of something you couldn't quite decipher.
“What?” you whispered, the question trembling on your lips, afraid of both the answer and the silence that might come after.
“For you to like me back,” he said, his voice almost a caress, the words like a revelation that left you breathless.
He looked at you, his eyes searching, probing for any sign of reciprocation. “Did it come true?”
You didn’t speak for a moment, stunned into silence. It wasn't just a casual question, it was a confession, a risk taken, a heart laid bare.
You opened your mouth to answer, but found that nothing came out. You swallowed thickly, trying to find the right words, the perfect way to convey the feelings that had been building inside you.
“Lewis…” you began again, your voice barely a whisper, your gaze fixed on the floor, still scared to meet his eyes.
He took your hand in his again, his touch gentle, but firm. He lifted your face until you were looking at him.
“Tell me,” he urged softly, his eyes pleading. “Please, tell me.”
You finally found the courage to meet his gaze, to look into those deep brown eyes that held so much warmth and understanding. Your heart skipped a beat, and you felt your cheeks flush.
“Yes, Lewis,” you whispered, the words barely audible. “Yes, I like you back.”
A slow smile spread across his face, and for a moment, the world around you seemed to disappear, leaving only the two of you, connected by a shared feeling, a mutual hope.
He squeezed your hand again, a silent promise, a shared understanding that had just changed everything. The roar of the crowd, the pressure of the race, the expectations of the season - all of it faded into the background.
All that truly mattered was right here, in this moment, with this man, the fastest man in the world, who wanted you, right here.
He laughed, a light, joyful sound that made your heart swell. “Good,” he breathed out, his smile reaching his eyes. “That’s very, very good.”
He finally closed the remaining gap between you, and pressed his lips against yours. You melted into his embrace, the kiss was soft, tender, and filled with the unspoken promise of a new beginning.
A beginning you never expected, but one you were more than ready for. Perhaps being here, so close, was exactly where you were meant to be. And you knew, with a certainty that settled deep in your soul, that this was just the beginning.
The first race of the season may have been won on the track, but a much more significant race had just begun, one that was just for you and Lewis. Starting from a wish. . . .
#lewis hamilton#formula 1#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 fic#formula one#f1 fanfic#f1#lewis hamilton x reader#sir lewis hamilton#lewis hamilton x you#lewis hamilton x black oc#mercedes amg f1#lh44 x reader#lh44 merc#lh44#lh44 imagine#team lh44#lh44 fic#lh44 x you#lh44 x y/n#mrsfancyferrari#mercedes f1#ferrari#ferrari racing#ferrari f1#australia gp 2025#lewis hamilton fanfic#lewis hamilton imagine
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Chapter 1: Through the Lens of Dreams
Rating: General Audiences
Warning: none, reader being distant with the team (more so paige)
Paring: Paige Bueckers x !photographer fem reader
Fandom: Women's basketball
Summary: "Paige Blockers" being a blocker...
Welcome to the chapter 1 of my New full length series called :Through The Lens. I hope you all enjoy and there is more to come...stay tuned my loveies!! 🏀💕📸
The assignment came as a surprise. One minute I was doodling in my notebook, bored out of my mind during Professor Gold's lecture, and the next, he was calling on me.
“Y/N, for your final project, how about something a bit more personal? Something that moves you?”
I blinked, trying to process the shift from the lecture’s dull monotony to my name echoing through the classroom. “Uh, like personal?” I asked, my voice hesitant.
“Yes,” Professor Gold said, his tone encouraging. “Think about what inspires you, what makes you feel alive. Your work has always been strong in capturing emotion and detail—why not channel that into something truly meaningful?”
I tilted my head, chewing on his suggestion. What did inspire me? Basketball had always been a big part of my life, from growing up watching UConn Women’s Basketball games with my mom to attending as a fan now. Maybe it wasn’t the worst idea.
“I… guess I could photograph the UConn Women’s team,” I said slowly, unsure if it would land right.
Professor Gold gave a reassuring nod. “Perfect. Use their stories, their passion, their journey. Show us what it means to be part of something bigger.”
A week later, I found myself walking toward the campus arena, my camera slung over my shoulder. It was game day, and I couldn’t help the excitement buzzing beneath my skin. The night’s game against a strong opponent was sure to be intense, and I couldn’t wait to capture it all through my lens.
Coach Geno Auriemma stood near the court, chatting with a few players, and I took a deep breath before stepping up to him.
“Coach Auriemma,” I said, approaching carefully. “I’m Y/N. I’ve been working on a project for Professor Gold, and I was wondering if I could talk to you for a moment about using the team as my subject.”
Coach turned, his eyes scanning me before a small smile tugged at the corner of his lips. “Y/N, right? Professor Gold mentioned you.”
I nodded, feeling a little more at ease under his gaze. “I’d love to capture moments from your team—practices, games, everything. I think it would make for a unique perspective.”
“Unique is good,” Coach said thoughtfully. “We’re always looking for new ways to connect with the fans and our supporters. Just make sure you’re capturing the right shots, no distractions for the team.”
“Yes, sir,” I replied quickly. “I’ll stay out of the way, I promise.”
The game was electric. I had never been this close to the court before, my heart racing as I snapped shot after shot. Paige Bueckers stood out, as she always did—smooth, confident, her presence commanding attention. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from her.
But then it happened.
Paige leaped for a block, her form graceful and determined. The sound of the ball slamming against her outstretched hand echoed through the arena. In a flash, the ball ricocheted toward me, and before I could even react, it collided with my camera.
The impact sent the camera crashing to the floor, shards of shattered lens scattering across the court.
Time seemed to freeze. My breath hitched as I stared at the mess of broken glass and metal. My favorite camera—ruined.
“Shit,” I whispered, crouching down to survey the damage.
Later that night, after the game had ended and I had made my way back to my dorm, I couldn’t stop thinking about Paige. The collision hadn’t just broken my camera—it had broken something inside me, too.
I knew I couldn’t keep avoiding her, but every time I thought about facing Paige again, I froze.
The next morning, I dragged myself to class, feeling like a walking ghost. It didn’t help that I shared a seat with KK Arnold, Paige’s teammate. KK wasn’t just my classmate—she was also someone who had seen the whole thing unfold.
“Hey, Y/N,” KK greeted with a smile, settling into her seat. “How’s the camera situation? Saw that you got a little too close to Paige’s shot block.”
I winced, my stomach twisting. “Yeah, it wasn’t… great.”
She chuckled softly, but her expression softened when she noticed my downcast eyes. “Look, Paige didn’t mean to—she feels bad about it, I know she does. It was an accident. She wasn’t trying to—”
“I know,” I cut in, forcing a smile. “It’s not her fault. Really.”
KK gave me a skeptical look but didn’t press further. “Just… maybe try not to avoid practice today? You’ve been avoiding the team, right?”
I bit my lip, feeling the weight of her words. Avoiding practice wasn’t helping me, but every time I thought about Paige, the memory of that broken camera flashed in my mind.
“I’ll think about it,” I murmured, turning my attention back to the lecture.
By the afternoon, I found myself back at the arena. The air felt different this time, heavier. The stands were packed, buzzing with energy, but I stayed focused on my camera, careful not to interfere with the team.
As I snapped photos, I caught glimpses of Paige—so effortless, so composed. Each shot of her was different, yet every one seemed to highlight that same magnetic presence she carried on the court.
Then, our eyes met.
It was only for a second, but it felt like the world stopped. Paige’s gaze held mine, soft but uncertain, like she was trying to say something without words.
I quickly looked away, heart thudding in my chest.
Later, after practice had ended and the court was mostly cleared, I lingered in the stands, replaying the moments over and over in my head. Paige’s block, the collision, the shattered camera—it wasn’t just a random accident. It had changed everything.
But as much as I wanted to hold on to the anger, the frustration, I couldn’t deny the pull toward her.
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-Thank You For Reading!🩵🩶
-prettygirl-gabi🎀✨️
Tag list: @sayurireidotcom , @astroeliza .... (more to be added)
#support the writers!#gabi writes#gabi answers#°~prettygirlgabi ask~°#paige buckets#paige x reader#paige bueckers x reader#paige bueckers#paige bueckers smut#paige bueckers fluff#paige bueckers x y/n#through the Lens series#kk arnold#morgan cheli#nika muhl#sarah strong#ice brady#uconn x reader#paige bueckers uconn#uconn women’s basketball#uconn huskies#uconn wbb#!photographer reader x !super senior paige#paige bueckers fic#fluff#angst#paige bueckers angst#geno auriemma#azzi fudd#kamorea arnold
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I Can Do It With A Broken Heart | S.R.
feat. Steve Rogers x fem!reader
SUMMARY: You and Steve broke up, but life as an assassin for SHIELD goes on, no matter how grueling. little did you know, Steve was suffering too, and reality is far from how it appears.
CW: MDNI 18+, smut, breakups, protective!Steve, assassin work, mentions of blood and death, Steve is a bit of a munch (but he still tops you), happy ending
AN: inspired by "I Can Do It With A Broken Heart" by Taylor Swift from her album The Tortured Poets Department.
divider by @saradika-graphics
Steve left you on a random Tuesday afternoon. No fanfare, no warning, no discussion. He barely even looked at you when he shattered your heart.
In the two years you'd known him, and the six months you loved him, you'd never seen him so callous. He'd looked at motorcycles with more affection than he looked at you in that moment.
You didn't understand, couldn't understand, but it didn't matter. Your relationship was over, and your life felt like a held breath ever since.
He said he'd love you all his life, but for a man that's been alive for a century, six months was barely a blip. You were barely a blip.
But you couldn't dwell, couldn't break down like you wanted to, because you were one of the top assassin's at SHIELD, and missions didn't care about your feelings.
So you were sent out into the field, day after day, week after week, with a smile on your face and your shoulders thrown back, never ever missing your mark. And still, SHIELD demanded more of you.
Fortunately, you could do it with a broken heart.
“Agent L/N, report to Fury’s office for assignment,” the earpiece in your ear crackled to life, jarring you from the workout you were pretending to do.
“Another one? Seriously?” Nat said, looking up from the squat rack, sweat glistening along her hairline.
You shrugged. “The fun never stops,” you said with a half-hearted smile, and she rolled her eyes, returning to her reps.
As quick as you could, you pulled an oversized hoodie over your sports bra and retied your ponytail, which has fallen into sweaty disarray during your workout.
Normally, you'd change into your suit, but when Fury called, he didn't like to be kept waiting.
You take the elevator direct to his office, and when the doors roll open, you're greeted by Nick Fury, Sergeant Barnes, and, of course, the back of Steves head.
His hair has grown a little longer since you were together, and your fingers itched to run through it, to scratch his scalp in the way that makes his dark lashes flutter, to tug on his roots in the way that makes him groan low in his throat…
You shook yourself and slapped on a smile. “Good morning, Nick,” you chirped, sauntering into the room.
“Morning, sunshine,” he said, offering as close to a smile as he could manage. “Have a seat.”
You perched on the edge of Bucky’s table, and he gave you a stiff nod in greeting . Steve didn't look up from the open file in front of him, but you could tell by the angle of his shoulders that he wasn't happy.
Nausea twisted in your stomach, your heart splintering a bit further, but you kept your expression pleasant.
“Would it kill you two to be a little more cheerful?” Fury quipped, and Bucky snorted. “Could all use a little more sunshine around here.” Fury winked at you, and you winked back.
Steve’s fingers tightened on the file, but you chalked it up to its contents.
“Little Miss Stabs-a-lot seems to be managing just fine for all of us,” Bucky said, his voice dry even though his eyes were smiling.
That's you, managing just fine.
Fury chuckled and passed you a similar file to Steves. “Your target is Lugoff Isaacson, HYDRA weapons director.”
You flipped through the file, finding a laundry-list of diabolical misdeeds, as well as a number of altercations with the two men beside you.
“Dinosaur’s couldn't hack it?” You teased, but only Nick laughed.
“Unfortunately, Mr. Isaacson lives like a hermit, and the only people allowed in his company are fellow HYDRA agents—” Nick paused, bracing his hands on the desk. “And pretty women.”
You heard Steve's teeth grind together, and Bucky glanced over at him, but you kept your eyes on your boss. “When do I leave?” You asked, already rising.
“Nick, she can't go in there with Isaacson alone,” Steve snapped, pushing the file away from him. His voice was rough and low, menacing, and it sent a chill up your spine.
“She certainly can,” Nick rebuffed. “Unless you want to go with her?”
Steve glared at Nick, so sharp it was practically lethal, but didn't say another word.
You felt like he stomped your heart beneath his boot, and were seized by the urge to fall at his feet and beg for a reason why he would do this to you. But instead, you flipped through the file, finding your orders in the back. “Flights at 2:30. I need to pack and get a blowout. I'll update when I land.” You tucked the file under your arm, blew Nick a kiss, and flitted back to the elevator, not sparing Steve a second glance.
He certainly wouldn't look back at you.
“How many is that this month?” You heard Bucky ask as the doors started to roll closed.
“15,” Fury answered, pride clear in his voice. “She's our most productive assassin to date.”
Steve's POV
“Don't give me that look, Rogers,” Fury droned, avoiding Steve's eye.
“She's not some goddamn chess piece you can just play however you want,” he bit, barely contained anger simmering underneath the surface. It took every ounce of his willpower to keep his mouth shut during that meeting, to not grab you around the middle and run for the fucking hills.
The thought of Isaacson, that slimy rat laying a hand on you—it made Steve's mind bleed red with rage. He knew you could handle him, knew you'd make quick, clean work of the kill, but the things you'd have to endure to get that perfect opportunity…
He couldn't bear it.
“Thats exactly what she is,” Fury said, snatching the file from in front of Steve. “It's what you all are.”
Bucky scoffed, crossing his arms over his chest, and Steve rose from his chair, bracing his hands on the table to lean into Fury’s smug face.
“I'm done playing your fucking games. And if you think I won't take her and leave, then you don't know me very well,” he growled.
Bucky got to his feet, metallic arm flexing as tensions mounted.
“Oh, I know you, Cap. I know you'll do whatever you need to do, move wherever the fuck I want you to move, so she stays on the damn board. Right?”
Steve grit his teeth. “And when we leave, whose going to come after us? Him?” He gestured to Bucky. “Nat? Thor? Quill? Whose it gonna be?”
Fury narrowed his eye.
“Because here's the thing you've never understood. Without us, there is no fucking SHIELD. You broke us up so she'd be free to your dirty work right? Without my interference?”
Fury scoffed and went to back away, but Bucky was standing directly behind him, blocking any escape route.
“She likes it—”
“It's killing her.” Steve cut him off. “When's the last time she had a day off? A vacation? A job that wasn't too hard for another agent, but too low profile to send us? Hm? Call her fucking sunshine while your burying her alive.”
“Steve,” Bucky warned, and the table cracked beneath Steve's hands.
“It ends now. Either SHIELD takes care of her, or I do.” Steve pushed off the desk and stormed out of the room, taking the stairs to get to the control room faster.
Nat was already there. “She just got to her apartment. Steve, she's—”
“I want eyes on her 24/7, and a team waiting to deploy within twenty miles of Isaacson bunker,” he ordered.
A chorus of ‘yessir’s’ answered him, and he sunk down in the vacant swivel chair, steepling his fingers as he watched the entrance to your apartment building, a SHIELD van idling just outside.
“Cap, listen.” Nat leaned against the control panel beside him. “This has to end, before she fucks up.”
“I know—”
“No, you don't. At this level of burnout, one misstep and that's it.”
“I know!” He barked, and the surveillance workers all jumped. “I'm fixing this. I just need a little more time.”
“She might not have time.” Nat pushed off the panel. “It might not be this mission, but it could be the next one, or the next. Stop being a fucking coward and fix it before it's too late.” She stormed off, leaving Steve staring at the monitors, his heart in his throat.
He was going to fix this. He had to fix this, before he lost you for good.
You hurried out of your apartment, dressed in slacks and blouse, wrapped up in a leather trenchcoat. The driver jumped out to greet you and took your bag, and you slipped into the backseat.
He flipped the camera to the car feed, a wonky fisheye from the dashboard, and saw you check your mascara in the mirror, faint smudges of black under your eyes, your nose kissed pink.
You'd been crying.
“I'm gonna fix it, baby,” he muttered to himself, wishing you could hear him somehow. “I promise.”
Reader's POV
You took out Isaacson without any issues, just smiled and tried to ignore the way he groped your thighs, ogled your tits. He made it too easy to slit his throat.
And as soon as you returned, there was another assignment, and another, and another, until you didn't even bother going home anymore. Which was well enough for you. You didn't care to sleep in the bed Steve held you in, or the couch you'd watched his favorite black and white movies on. Didn't care to eat in the kitchen where you taught him to make your mother's signature recipe, or shower in the stall he'd washed your hair in when you were sick. It was better to stay away from all the little reminders that you didn't imagine the whole thing.
You pretended to love being busy, treated every mission like a birthday gift, and pushed forward. Until, you were assigned to work at the Winter Gala.
SHIELD hosted the annual event as an excuse for the team to rub elbows with politicians, diplomats, and executives. You'd be masquerading as a guest, of course, but in reality you were on intel duty, eavesdropping on conversations and flirting trade secrets out of the most powerful people in the world.
One of the few perks of still being anonymous to the world.
You were dreading it. A night filled with romantic music, dancing, and drinks, watching Steve schmooze with women twice as wealthy and twice as powerful as you? You'd rather choke on your own dagger. But you were determined to look fabulous, a young woman in her glittering prime, and maybe you'd feel something besides emptiness.
Tony had a gorgeous ball gown sent to your apartment that probably cost more than your annual salary, and you spent three hours on your hair and makeup for the occasion, mainly because you kept crying it off. But at the last minute you steeled yourself and carpooled with Nat to Stark Tower.
She wolf whistled as you climbed into the car, looking downright stunning herself. “I know I'm not supposed to comment, but that fossil is going to lose his fucking mind.” She chuckled, tearing off down the street.
“Lose his mind?” You snorted inelegantly. “I can barely get a ‘hello’ out of him.”
Nat looked at you sidelong, the expression sharpened by her eyeliner. “And why do you think that is, babe?”
You didn't dare comment, didn't dare think about it. You'd never get through the night if you clung to a razor thin thread of hope.
The party was in full swing when you arrived, and you came in separately from Nat to forgo any suspicion. With a glass of champagne in hand, you circled the party, trying to tune out your own thoughts so you could absorb all the conversations going on around you.
But the noise completely stopped when your eyes met Steve's across the room.
He was dressed in an immaculately tailored Navy blue suit, with a crisp white shirt and brown leather loafers. His hair was styled back from his face, his beard freshly trimmed, and he was staring at you like hunter through a scope.
“Y/n, sweetheart, come with me for a moment,” Tony appeared to your left, startling you out of your reverie. “There's someone I want you to meet.” He winked, and you flashed a toothy smile, even though you felt like screaming.
“Lead the way, Mr. Stark,” you cooed, for the benefit of anyone in earshot.
Tony led you away, but you could feel Steve's eyes burning a hole in your back, tracking you through the crowd.
“Alex, this is Lydia, the daughter of a colleague of mine. You both attended Stanford!” Tony lied through his teeth to a handsome, dark haired gentleman, and you picked it up without delay.
“Oh, of course! It's such a pleasure to finally meet you!” You gushed, sliding onto the stool beside the stranger. “Tell me, what was your favorite time of year on campus?” You brushed your fingers along his forearm, noting the model of the Rolex on his wrist, the designer of his suit.
“Fall, of course. Can't beat those colors,” Alex grinned, and you fawned like it was the most ground breaking thing you'd ever heard.
Tony left you to it, and twenty minutes later you were tucked into a booth with Alex, his arm slung over your shoulders, and his phone face up and unlocked right in front of you. Oblivious to the way you scanned every message that came through.
Alex leaned closer, his nose brushing the shell of your ear, and you had to swallow a shiver of revulsion. His hand came up to cup your cheek as you wracked you mind for a way out of this—
“Sorry to interrupt, Mr. Trevais, but I need to steal Lydia for a moment.” Nat appeared suddenly beside the table, looking smug, and Alex scowled.
“Right now? Really?” He argued.
“I'm afraid so.” Nat batted her lashes and Alex immediately caved.
“Fine, I'll see you later then?” He winked, alluding to the room key he slipped into your bag a few minutes prior.
“Perhaps.” You winked back, playing coy, and he grinned like a fool. “What's going on?” You hissed as Nat led you out of the party and down an dark, empty hall. "I was in the middle of something—"
“You'll see,” she whispered back, stopping at a door and doing a quick sweep before pulling it open and ushering you inside.
The door slammed shut behind you.
“Nat, what—”
The lights came on in the room, dim and golden to reveal the luxurious study you were standing in, all black leather and granite, shelves of books and expensive furniture.
But you barely registered any of that, because Steve Rogers was waiting for you by the window. Moonlight kissed his face, highlighting the flawless angles on his bone structure, and your mouth ran dry, your heart falling through the floor.
“Uh, is there a problem, Captain Rogers?” You asked, propping up the professional barrier despite the urge to launch yourself at him, the need to kiss him, or strangle him, pushing against the underside of your skin.
When he looked at up you, the air was sucked from the room. His eyes were stormy, fogged with sorrow, water collecting on his lower lashes.
“You really have turned espionage into an art form,” he chuckled, his voice thick with emotion. “Like you're having the time of your life.”
You stared at him, dumbfounded.
“But that's not true, is it? You're as miserable as I am.”
You shook your head. “I—I’m fine.”
He huffed a laugh, pushing off the window sill. “You put on a good act, honey. But I can tell when you're performing.”
You narrowed your eyes at him, indignation flaring in your gut. “What do you want, Steve? You haven't spoken to me in months.”
He grimaced, a look of genuine pain crossing his face. “Y/n, I—”
“You disappeared for two weeks after dumping me out of the blue. You refuse to take missions within a hundred miles of me. You won't even train at the same time." You were yelling, unable to stop once you started. You'd kept it all bottled up for so long, there was no forcing it back now. "You've barely looked at me, Steve! It's like we never happened, like I made it all up in my head!”
“Because it was killing me!” He shouted back, and you flinched, tears pricking behind your eyes. You could count on one hand the amount of times Steve Rogers raised his voice, and it was never at you.
“You left me!” You yelled, your voice cracking at the edges.
“Because I had no choice! They gave me no choice.”
Your stomach dropped. “W-what?”
He pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to regain his composure. “Fury, SHIELD, they threatened to send you overseas if I didn't. To some desolate base in Russia.”
You couldn't believe what you were hearing. This couldn't be real. “Steve, that doesn't make sense—”
“You really think I would leave you like that? That I would just throw away what we had? I was trying—” his voice caught in his throat. “I thought I was protecting you. But they lied to me.”
You were shaking your head, backing away. You couldn’t take any more empty words, any more bullshit—
Steve rushed toward you, catching your face in his large hands before you could turn away. “Baby, listen to me,” he said, softening. “They wanted me out of the way so you would be more likely to do whatever they wanted. When we were together, we were working less, we were happier, we cared about something that wasn't SHIELD, and they couldn't stand it.”
“But Fury—”
“Is a manipulative fuck that took advantage of your broken heart.” You gasped at his language, usually reserved for sex or intense fighting. Steve lowered himself to his knees, his hands gripping the curve of your waist and shaking you. “I need you to believe me, honey. I'm begging you. I would never have done this if I knew the truth. I'm so sorry for hurting you, and I wish I could take it back. But I can't, all I can do is tell you the truth.”
“You didn't want to leave me?” You asked, voice barely above a whisper.
“Of course not.” He rested his forehead on your belly, drawing a shaky breath before looking up at you again, pleading with big, blue, watery eyes. “I-I love you. And I agreed because I was terrified to lose you completely but then I—I did anyways because I'm a fucking coward.”
You wiped a tear from his cheek with your thumb, the last of your trepidation falling away. “I love you too, Stevie,” you said, and he surged upwards, slamming his mouth to yours in a ruinous, bone-melting kiss.
He parted your lips with his tongue, possessing your mouth in a display of dominance you rarely saw from him. He licked along your teeth, groaning low in his throat as you dug your nails into his hair, pulling him impossibly closer. He tasted like black coffee and something sweet, like he'd hit the dessert table instead of the bar, and it made your heart flip.
God, you'd missed him.
Your lungs screamed for air, an affliction super soldiers didn't contend with, and you were forced to break the kiss to breathe.
“Cameras?” You panted, craning your head back as Steve planted wet, open-mouth kisses down your jugular.
“This is Fury's personal study. No cameras,” Steve mumbled against the peak of your shoulder, his hands all over you.
You scoffed. “Of course, because he can have priv—”
“Forget about him.” Steve captured your lips again, and you nipped at his lower lip for cutting you off. He backed you against the desk, breaking the kiss to toss you up onto it.
“Forgotten,” you replied, breathless as you looked into his eyes.
“I haven't told you how beautiful you look yet, have I?” He asked, leaning back a bit to take you in, your chest heaving against the deep plunge of your dress, lips kiss-stung and eyes bright.
You shook your head, tossing your hair over your shoulder with a smirk.
“I love this color on you,” he murmured, rubbing the hem of your dress between his thumb and index finger. And your makeup—”
“Steve.” You grabbed him by the lapel and tugged him closer, bringing his face down towards yours. A flare of arousal twinged between your legs, you loved when he let you manhandle him. “I know you're trying to be a gentleman and not fuck me without some proper flirting, but it's been months. I need you.”
Steve smiled, leaning forward to lay you back on the desk. “You don't need me, honey,” he hummed, kissing down your sternum while his hands moved your dress up your legs. He looked up at you when he settled between your thighs. “You've proven that you're a force all on your own. And that's okay, you don't have to need me, as long as you want me.”
You nibbled your lower lip, processing his words. He was right, you'd proven that you could live through heartbreak, that you didn't need him to carry on. And as much as it hurt, and as much as you missed him, there was something liberating in that knowledge.
“So, do you want me?” He asked, grazing his thumb over the gusset of your panties, maddeningly light.
“Yes, I want you,” you answered, threading your fingers through his blond hair and urging him forward.
He chuckled, smiling up at you, then pulled your panties to the side with his middle finger and flattened his tongue against your slit, licking a firm stripe up your pussy. Your head fell back onto the desk when he sucked your clit between his teeth, wasting no time in his pursuit of your pleasure.
Steve, for all his propriety and politeness, loved nothing more than feasting on your pussy. He was sloppy with it, rough and self-indulgent, as if making up for the decades he went without it. He often stayed until you were overstimulated and orgasmed-out, weakly trying to push his head from between your legs while he lapped up the mess you made for him.
“Missed you so damn much,” he mumbled against your pussy, eyes fluttering closed as he drove his tongue into your entrance.
“Missed you,” you whined, your hips bucking up into his mouth as he devoured you, lashing every one of your sweet spots with expert precision.
His hands tightened on your hips while he massaged your clit with his tongue, and even that fraction of his real strength was enough to leave a dull ache. The reminder of his true strength made your head spin, your mind empty. You may not need him, but there was something thrilling about being able let go while you were with him. Trusting that he would keep you safe and you could just be.
He licked one last stripe up your pussy before pulling back, kissing his way up your body. “Baby, I need you,” he mumbled, nosing into your neck. You could feel just how badly from the ridge beneath his trousers, his hips rocking slightly into yours. “Please, can I fuck you?” He asked, unlatching his belt with a flick of his wrist, and a shiver rolled up your spine at the desperation in his voice.
“You want to fuck me?” You repeated, toying with him. You reached between your bodies and pulled out his cock, thick and long and flushed, and pumped it once, twice, smearing precum down his shaft.
He moaned, hot and breathy against your skin. “I know I hurt you, and I still have to make up for that, but I just—fuck, I need to feel you. Please, please let me make you come on my cock.”
“Just start slow,” you cooed, petting his cheek when he lifted his head in excitement. “Been awhile since I took you.” You glided his cockhead through your folds, his breath hitching when you notched it at your drooling entrance.
Gently, he eased his hips forward, sliding in one inch, then another. "Shit, honey. Have a little mercy," he panted, his muscles bulging against the fabric of his shirt, tendons in his neck flexing.
You groaned, releasing his cock to grab hold of his shoulders, nails biting into his shirt at the stretch, bright and burning.
“Gotta relax, baby. Let me in.” He gently guided you thigh up and around his waist, squeezing the fat of your haunch in reassurance. He moved a little deeper, and you both gasped when your walls clenched around him. “So goddamn tight,” he rasped, drawing his hips back a bit, assuaging some of the discomfort before easing back inside, coaxing your muscles to loosen for him.
“Fuck, Steve,” you panted when he pushed a little deeper, your eyes rolling back in your head when he grazed your g-spot.
“Almost there, doll. You can do it,” he encouraged, reaching up to hold your face. He caught your gaze, smiling a little when your eyes struggled to stay focused, lashes fluttering. “Starting to feel good?”
You nodded, pleasure spilling through you as your body accepted him inch by inch, until finally, you felt his pelvis press against yours.
“There we go,” he purred, leaning down to kiss your forehead, your cheek, giving you a few more seconds to adjust. “Good girl, takin’ all that cock.”
He ground into you, stifling a fractured moan against your shoulder when your pussy made an obscene squelching sound, dripping wet for him. You were on another planet, tingling head to toe as waves of pleasure crested. Every beat of your heart had you clenching around him, full to splitting, and you wanted more.
“Please, baby, need more,” you whined, trying to rock your hips against his, but he was too heavy for you to do much.
He braced his hands on either side of your head, sweeping his eyes down your body as you squirmed beneath him. He chuckled, the sound low and almost malicious. “Need more?"
He drew his hips back and delivered a punishing thrust, two, three, five, until you were all but screaming, unable to do anything but lay there and take everything he gave you.
"How's that for more?" He asked, his cock brutalizing your cervix and stretching you beyond your limits, molding your pussy to the shape of his cock. Ruining you with a fervor that made your head spin.
Your peak was rapidly approaching, winding tighter and tighter with every thrust until you were half-mad with desperation, clawing at his forearms by your head and leaving pink, raised lines across his flesh.
“Gonna come for me, baby? God, I missed this little pussy—feels so good,” he grated, bringing one of his hands down to circle to your clit, firm and deliberate. Exactly what he knew you needed. “That's my good girl. C'mon, I’m right there with you—” Another thrust and he sent you both flying over the edge, sparks exploding behind your eyes as the orgasm ravaged your body, flaying you open.
You grabbed onto his arm, desperate for something to ground you as you soared, his hips still thrusting erratically as he pumped you full of his release.
Crack!
The desk suddenly tilted beneath you and Steve whisked you up into his arms, still buried inside you. You clung to him in shock as the desk collapsed to floor, sending all of Fury's belongings scattered across the carpet.
"Are you alright?" He asked, searching your face.
You nodded, easing your grip on him.
Steve adjusted you, lifting and lowering you onto his cock, and you gasped, still sensitive from the lingering orgasm, and mildly shocked by his lack of reaction to what you'd just done.
“Steve, we—”
“We did,” he hummed, kissing along your neck as he caught his breath, lazily working you over his length to wallow in the last dregs of pleasure. “And if he has a problem, he can take it up with me.”
“I think he's going to have a problem,” you snickered, and Steve smiled.
“And I'll deal with it.” He eased himself out of you and set you on your feet, straightening your panties and pressing a tender kiss to your lips. You felt like you were floating in a dream, in disbelief that you had your Steve back, that he never really was gone in the first place.
“How are you going to deal with it?” You asked after righting your dress and he had tucked himself back into his trousers.
Steve pulled you back into his arms, like even that moment of separation was more than he could bear. “Depends on how much of a problem he has,” he replied, smirking. “I told you, forget about him. I'll handle it for us.”
Us. Your knees went a little weak at the word. “Yes, Captain,” you replied rising on your toes to kiss his cheek.
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𝑡𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑡 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑔𝑜.
PAIRING: jj maybank x fem!reader WARNINGS: jealously, arguments, no use of y/n GENRE: angst SONG INSPIRATION: is there someone else? by the weeknd WORD COUNT: 4.1k REQUESTED: yes NOTE: can you tell that me breaking no contact didn't go well?
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you were tired. not the kind of tired you could fix with a good night’s sleep or an extra cup of coffee.
no, this was deeper. heavier. it had been weighing on you for months, maybe longer, and no matter how much you told yourself you were done.
that this time would be the last, you always found yourself right back where you started, with jj.
it wasn’t the kissing that made you feel this way, not exactly. you liked kissing him. god, you loved kissing him. the way his lips tasted faintly of weed and beer, the way he held you like you were the only thing grounding him.
the way his stupid grin would soften just for you, his cocky bravado melting into something almost vulnerable. for a few fleeting hours, it felt like everything you wanted, everything you’d dreamed of since the first time you realised how deep your feelings for him ran.
but it was never real. not when the alcohol was buzzing in his veins, not when he whispered things he’d never say in the harsh light of day. “you know it’s always been you, right?” his voice would crack sometimes, and you’d feel your heart breaking and healing all at once.
or there’d be the quiet, desperate promises. “one day, i’m gonna do right by you. i swear.” and for a moment, you’d believe him.
you always believed him.
but then the sun would rise, and jj would be gone. not gone in the literal sense. no, he’d still be around, cracking jokes, causing trouble, being him. but it was like the version of him you got in the middle of the night didn’t exist in the daylight.
instead, you’d see him with someone else, his arm slung around some girl, his attention completely absorbed by her like you’d never even crossed his mind.
it wasn’t just one time. it wasn’t even a few times. it was a pattern, and it was breaking you. because as much as you wanted to hate him for it, you couldn’t. you couldn’t hate him for being who he was, for not giving you the thing you so desperately wanted but he so clearly wasn’t ready to give.
you hated the way you let him in, over and over again. the way you believed the things he said, even when he never followed through on them. you hated the way your heart sped up when he looked at you, even though you knew that look wouldn’t last.
you hated the way your chest ached every time you saw him with someone else, the way you had to swallow the lump in your throat and force a smile like it didn’t matter.
but it did matter. it mattered too much.
so, you told yourself you were done. this time, for real. no more stolen kisses, no more whispered promises. no more jj.
moving on wasn’t easy, though. it wasn’t like you could just flip a switch and stop caring. but you tried. you told yourself it was okay to look at other guys, to flirt a little, to remind yourself that there were people out there who might actually be able to give you what jj couldn’t.
at first, it felt hollow. empty. none of the guys you talked to really clicked, and you started to wonder if you were just wasting your time. but then there was jackson.
jackson wasn’t like jj. he didn’t have that wild spark, that untamed energy that drew people in. but maybe that was a good thing. because jackson was steady. reliable. the kind of guy who made you feel safe instead of uncertain.
he wasn’t one for grand gestures or flashy moves. but he was thoughtful in ways that caught you off guard. like when he texted you first thing in the morning, asking how you slept. or when he remembered little things about you. your favorite coffee order, the song you hummed under your breath when you thought no one was listening.
and maybe the chemistry wasn’t instant. maybe there weren’t fireworks or that pull you’d always felt with jj. but there was something else. something quieter. something warmer.
still, there were moments when doubt crept in.
late at night, when your phone buzzed and you half hoped it was him. even though you knew it wouldn’t be. or when you caught yourself comparing the two of them, wondering if you’d ever feel the same fire you felt for jj with someone else.
the doubt lingered. refusing to leave no matter how much you tried to shake it.
the room had quieted down, the hum of conversation replaced by the soft rustling of the evening. the others had scattered. pope was buried in his notes on the porch, sarah and john b had disappeared into the twinkie for some ‘alone time,’ and kie had made herself scarce, muttering something about a late-night walk.
that left just you and jj, sprawled on opposite ends of the couch. you had tucked yourself into the corner, scrolling through your phone, a quiet giggle escaping your lips now and then. it wasn’t intentional, but each laugh seemed to draw jj’s attention, his eyes flickering toward you.
“what’s so funny over there?” he finally asked, his tone light but laced with curiosity.
you glanced up at him briefly, your lips still tugged into a soft smile. "nothing," you said casually, shrugging as you turned your attention back to your phone.
he shifted, sitting up slightly, leaning toward you, his eyebrows raised. "nah, come on. don’t give me that. who’s got you giggling like that? share with the class."
you hesitated, your fingers tightening around your phone as you debated whether or not to answer. you weren’t doing anything wrong, not really, but something about admitting you were texting jackson felt... complicated.
"it’s just jackson," you said finally, keeping your tone light. "he sent me something funny."
jj froze for a split second, so brief you might have missed it if you weren’t paying attention. but then he leaned back, his smirk slipping into place. "oh, jackson, huh?" he drawled, his voice dripping with something that wasn’t quite teasing but wasn’t far from it either.
"what’s he got you laughing about? some dad joke or something?"
you rolled your eyes, trying to ignore the way his sudden shift made your stomach twist. "it’s not a big deal, jayj," you said, shrugging again. "just a funny meme. relax."
"relax? i’m totally relaxed," he shot back, but there was an edge to his voice now, subtle but obvious to you. he stretched out on the couch, his arm draping over the back, his eyes fixed on you. "i mean, good for you, right? jackson seems like... a solid guy."
you could feel the tension creeping into the air between you, and you hated it. you hated how jj could make something so small feel so heavy, how his words, his tone, could tangle you up inside even when you tried so hard not to let them.
"yeah, he is," you said quietly, your eyes still on your phone. "he’s nice."
"nice," jj repeated, the word rolling off his tongue like it left a bad taste in his mouth. "that’s great. real exciting."
you looked up at him then, your gaze meeting his, and for a moment, the cocky mask he wore slipped. there was something raw in his eyes, something he couldn’t quite hide no matter how hard he tried.
"why do you care?" you asked softly, the question hanging between you.
he opened his mouth to answer, then closed it again, his jaw tightening. for a moment, it looked like he might actually say something real, something honest. but then he shook his head, his smile sliding back into place.
"i don’t," he said with a shrug, his voice light and breezy. "just curious, that’s all. you know me, always gotta know what’s going on."
but you weren’t convinced, and from the way he avoided your eyes, you knew he wasn’t either.
you turned back to your phone, trying to focus on jackson’s message, but jj’s presence was impossible to ignore. the warmth of his presence, the way his leg brushed against yours when he shifted. everything about him pulled at you, even when you didn’t want it to.
the tension had been building for days, his snide comments had started small. barely noticeable jabs that you brushed off with a roll of your eyes. but they didn’t stop. every interaction seemed to carry a sharper edge, a hidden layer of something he wouldn’t address. and while he never said anything outright about what had been between you, it was there, unspoken, colouring every word that left his mouth.
by the end of the week, it had become unbearable.
you were sitting at home, sprawled on your bed with the tv on for background noise, trying to find some semblance of peace. but jj had shown up unannounced, like he always did, at first, he just hovered, pacing around your room, muttering something about john b, then pope, then kie. and when that didn’t hold his attention, he turned his focus to you.
"really?" he scoffed, nodding toward your phone. "let me guess, you’re texting jackson. again."
you froze, your grip on the phone tightening as your pulse spiked. he was baiting you. again, but this time, you weren’t in the mood to play along. "what’s your problem, jj?" you said, not looking up.
"my problem?" he said, his voice cutting as his eyes flicked over you. "i don’t have a problem. just didn’t realise you were into guys who need a manual to figure you out. guess you finally found someone slow enough to keep up."
that was it. that was the breaking point.
you stood up so fast your phone fell onto the floor, your chest heaving as you rounded on him. "what the hell is wrong with you?" you snapped, your voice louder than you’d intended.
"you’ve been like this all week, taking cheap shots, acting like a total asshole. why? because i’m trying to move on? because i’m finally doing something for myself instead of waiting around for you to get your shit together?"
jj blinked, startled by the sudden outburst, but his defenses went up just as quickly. his jaw tightened, and he crossed his arms over his chest, leaning back slightly. "i don’t know what you’re talking about," he said, his voice colder now. "i’m just calling it like i see it."
"calling it like you see it?" you repeated, your voice shaking with anger. "no, jj. you’re being a coward. you can’t handle the fact that i’m not waiting around for you anymore, so you’re lashing out like some jealous boyfriend. grow up!"
"jealous?" he scoffed, his laugh bitter. "of jackson? please. the guy you’re settling for?”
"stop it," you snapped, your voice breaking slightly. "just stop. you don’t get to do this. you don’t get to act like this when you’re the one who’s been stringing me along for months. you don’t get to pick and choose when to care about me. you either want me, jj, or you don’t. but i can’t keep doing this with you."
for a moment, the room was silent, your words hanging heavy in the air between you. jj’s expression flickered, his mask slipping for just a second, and you saw something raw in his eyes. guilt. pain. maybe even regret. but it wasn’t enough. not this time.
"that’s what i thought," you said, your voice quieter now but still stern. "you can’t even say it, can you? you can’t admit that you don’t want me, but you can’t stand the thought of someone else making me happy either. that’s not love, jj. that’s just being selfish."
he opened his mouth to say something, but you didn’t give him the chance. you shook your head, turning away from him as tears stung the corners of your eyes. "just go," you said, your voice trembling. "i can’t do this anymore."
but he didn’t move. he stayed frozen in the same spot, staring at you, like he was waiting for something.
you whipped around to face him, your hands shaking. "why the hell are you still here?" you snapped, fury rising in your chest. "are you really just gonna stand there? if you won’t leave, then i will."
without another word, you turned and stormed down the stairs, the adrenaline making your steps faster, sharper. you grabbed the door, slamming it behind you so hard the house seemed to tremble.
you didn’t stop. your feet pounded the pavement, the cool night air biting at your skin, but you didn’t care. in all your anger, you hadn’t even grabbed a jacket, and now the chill of the night was cutting through you.
you found yourself heading to the beach without even thinking. the sound of the waves crashing against the shore was distant, muffled by the pounding of your pulse in your ears.
you reached the sand, and collapsed down, too exhausted to care about the discomfort. the wind howled around you, you pulled your knees to your chest, wrapping your arms around them as if you could hold yourself together that way.
the tears that had been threatening for so long finally broke free, flooding down your cheeks as the full weight of it hit you.
you couldn’t stop the sobs, each one shaking through your body. it felt like every bit of the anger, the hurt, the confusion, and the love you had poured into jj over the months came crashing down all at once. it wasn’t fair.
none of it was. you had given him everything, trusted him, believed his empty promises, and now... you were sitting alone on the beach in the dark, freezing cold, with nothing left but the ache in your chest.
you buried your face into your knees, the salt of your tears mixing with the salt of the ocean breeze, as you let the emptiness swallow you whole.
the tears had stopped, but they clung to your skin, leaving long streaks down your cheeks. your eyes were swollen, your lips tender and raw from the sobbing, and you just sat there, numb, staring out at the dark expanse of the ocean.
the waves crashed relentlessly, matching the rhythm of the ache inside you, but you couldn't bring yourself to care.
you had no idea how much time had passed. minutes? hours? the world felt like it had gone quiet around you, just you and the ocean. and then, the sound of footsteps. at first, you didn’t acknowledge it.
you figured it was just the wind or some passing stranger, but the steps grew closer. you held your breath, the space around you suddenly feeling claustrophobic, like everything in you knew who was coming, even before you saw him.
the sound of a thud broke the silence as someone sat down beside you. you turned slowly, the muscles in your neck aching, but there he was. of course, it was him.
for a moment, all you could do was stare, the disbelief hitting you. your chest tightened again, and before you could stop it, a tear slipped down your cheek. you wiped it away angrily, but it didn't matter. the damage was already done.
a bitter, humourless laugh escaped you, the sound raw and broken. "why can’t you just leave me alone?" you muttered, the words barely audible. you tried to look away, but your eyes wouldn’t shift from him.
you hated the way your heart twisted at the sight of him, even now, even after everything.
jj didn’t say anything at first, just sitting there beside you, his presence heavy. you could feel his gaze on you, but you couldn’t bring yourself to meet it. the silence stretched between you, thick with unspoken things.
you glanced back over to him to find his own eyes were swollen, lips and nose tinged pink from what you could only guess were from his own breakdown, his hands still trembling as they rested at his sides.
you hated how, despite all the pain he’d caused, you still found him pretty in this moment. the vulnerability in him, the way he wore his brokenness so openly, it made your chest ache. it was the last thing you wanted to feel.
he didn’t speak. neither did you. it felt like you were both waiting for the other to break first. but it wasn’t until the sound of the waves crashing against the shore felt too deafening that he finally spoke, his voice cracked, raw.
“i… i’m sorry," he began, voice thick with something like regret. "i’ve been a fucking idiot, okay? i know i have. and i don’t know how to fix it. i don’t know what i’m doing, or what i’ve done to you… but i need you to know that it’s not because i don’t care.”
his words were stuttering, full of shame, but the way he said it, the way his hands fidgeted, his desperation was impossible to ignore.
“i–god, i fucked this up, didn’t i? i… i always do this. i push, i pull, i make you feel like shit, and then… then i can’t stand the thought of losing you. but every time you walk away, i don’t know how to make you stay. i never know what the right thing to say is, and i just... i just hurt you again and again. i’m so fucking sorry."
you were still staring out at the ocean, fighting the hurt that sat heavy in your chest, fighting the urge to listen to the softness in his voice, to hear him out. but you couldn’t. not yet.
“i’m not asking for your forgiveness,” he said, his voice breaking. “i don’t deserve it. but i need you to know how much i fucking care about you. more than i know how to say. more than i can ever show. it’s like i don’t know what to do with it, so i make everything worse. but you–you matter to me more than anything else in my stupid fucking life. and if you can find it in you to forgive me... if you can just look at me the way you used to, i’ll do anything. i swear, i’ll do whatever it takes.”
his voice was softer now, quieter, almost pleading as he inched closer to you on the sand, his face full of regret. his eyes searched yours, desperate to find any trace of warmth, any sign that you still cared.
“i’m begging you,” he said, his voice trembling. “please. i can’t lose you. i can’t. i know i fucked up, but please. give me the chance to make it right. please don’t walk away from me. not like this.”
the words hung in the air between you, his desperate plea reverberating in the cold night as you sat there, trembling from the weight of it all. your chest felt tight, the pain of everything that had happened pressing on you, threatening to suffocate you.
his words reached you, pierced through the numbness you had been trying to build around yourself. but you weren’t ready yet, not ready to let go of the anger, the hurt. you wanted to stay mad at him, wanted to keep your distance, to protect yourself.
but you couldn’t.
you felt the floodgates open, and the dam you’d so carefully built up around your heart cracked, letting the years of suppressed feelings break free in one overwhelming rush.
the tears came first, unbidden, streaking down your cheeks as your breath caught in your throat. you wiped at your face, trying to hold it together, but the weight of everything, the heartache that had built up for so long, was impossible to ignore. you turned toward him, your voice shook as you spoke, barely a whisper at first.
“you don’t get it,” you said, the rawness in your voice making it hard to speak. “you don’t get how much i wanted this… how much i wanted you.”
your hands were trembling now, your heart hammering as the words poured out, no longer able to keep them locked inside. “i’ve been holding on to this... this stupid hope, waiting for you to realise how i feel. but i couldn’t do it anymore, jj. i couldn’t keep waiting for you to come around. for you to see me. to see us. every time i tried to let you in, you pushed me away. every time you said you cared, i believed you, and you made me feel like an idiot for it."
you paused, trying to steady your breath as your chest tightened again.
“i kept telling myself i was done. that i was over it. that i could move on. but every time i saw you with someone else, every time you pulled away, it tore me apart. it felt like i was drowning in it, jj. and i kept asking myself why i kept putting myself through that, why i kept letting you hurt me. but the truth is, i can’t stop wanting you. i can’t stop needing you.”
you took a shaky breath, your eyes brimming with tears again, but this time, they felt different. this time, they were from the depths of everything you’d been holding back. the fear. the hurt. the longing.
“i can’t do it anymore,” you whispered. “i need you. i’ve needed you for so long, but you never, never, let me be close enough. and it’s breaking me. it has been for so long.”
"i don’t want to be this broken, desperate person anymore," you continued, the tears coming faster now. "i can’t keep waiting for you to make up your mind. but god… god, i need you to choose me. i need you to finally see me. not as some game, not as someone you can just toss aside when it's not convenient for you anymore. i need to know you’re here for me. that you want me too.”
you looked up at him then, your heart in your throat, his eyes were wide, filled with a mix of guilt, pain. “i need you, jj,” you said again, your voice barely more than a whisper now. "i don’t care if it’s messy. i don’t care if it’s hard. i just need to know you’re here… that you’re really here."
the weight of it all hung in the air between you, and you felt exposed. but for the first time in what felt like forever, you didn’t care about hiding anymore. you were done pretending you didn’t need him. done pretending you could walk away from what had been growing between you for so long.
he reached out, tentatively at first, like he was scared you’d pull away. his fingers brushed against yours, a gentle touch that seemed to break the tension in the air.
“hey… hey, look at me.” his voice was softer than you had ever heard it, like he was trying to steady himself, trying to make sure he didn’t fuck this up. he moved closer to you, his other hand resting carefully on your cheek, wiping away a tear with the pad of his thumb.
“i’m here,” he said, his voice low, but full of conviction now. “i’m right here, and i’ve always been here, in my messed up way. i know i’ve hurt you. i know i’ve been a fucking idiot. i don’t deserve you, but damn it, i’m not going anywhere. i don’t want anyone else. it’s always been you, even when i was too stupid to admit it to myself. but i’m not afraid anymore.”
he let out a shaky breath, and you could see how real he was being. it wasn’t just the guilt on his face anymore; it was something else, something pure. it was like he was finally letting himself be vulnerable with you, really showing you what he’d been hiding all this time.
“i’m so sorry for making you feel like you had to fight for me,” he whispered, his voice cracking slightly. “i should’ve chosen you from the start. i should’ve seen you. really seen you, for who you are. not just the person who’s always there when i need them. you’re more than that. you always have been.”
his forehead pressed gently against yours, and you could feel his breath mingling with yours. his hand moved to your back, pulling you closer, as if he was afraid that if he let you go, you’d slip away forever.
“i need you too,” he murmured, his lips brushing your ear. “i’m not perfect. i’m never gonna be perfect. but i’ll spend the rest of my life showing you how much you mean to me. because you are my choice. always. you’re all i want.”
the warmth of his words, the tenderness in his touch, broke something open in you, you allowed yourself to lean into him fully.
all the walls you had built around your heart started to crumble, piece by piece.
comments and reblogs are appreciated ˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗
© ruewrote 2024.
#jj maybank#jj maybank x reader#jj maybank oneshots#jj maybank imagines#jj maybank fanfics#rudy pankow#rudy pankow x reader#rudy pankow oneshots#rudy pankow imagines#rudy pankow fanfics#outer banks#outer banks x reader#outer banks oneshots#outer banks imagines#outer banks fanfics#obx#obx x reader#obx oneshots#obx imagines#obx fanfics#x reader#oneshots#imagines#fanfics#ruewrote#jj maybank angst#jj maybank x reader angst#angst
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JayVik x Reader Personal Pigments (Part 21) - Phthalo Emerald (NSFW)
As of last chapter this is a jayvik x reader fic now. It is going to be a JayVik fic. Ft. Viktor being a quiet lover boy and JayVik smut. haven't written MLM +18 before so careful and I'm sorry in advance lol. it'll be marked by a breaker MDNI
Find my imagine that inspired it here. Previous and next chapter will be linked at the bottom.
As much as daily chapters were fun to do, not feasible with my current work schedule. It may move to 2-4 days between releases now. stay tuned and Thank you for reading <3 Sorry it took so long for this update! I was in a wedding that I had to travel for and also holiday burnout. But I'm back with a vengeance.
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It had been a good morning for Viktor, he had awoken rested. Warm. Wrapped in Jayce's arms. This became a more familiar feeling. What was once ephemeral memories of rarely shared naps had turned into cuddling in bed together, warm broad hands rubbing into his legs and back. Jayce cologne settled into his pillows weeks ago. Cold mornings alone now were warm and slow starts to the day. Fleeting kisses and soft touches, drapes of cloth and linen. This morning was like all the others, and there was nothing that either of them would change about it. Aside from you.
Time had continued to pass as it always did, and their patience began to wane. Admittedly it was Viktor’s own that seemed to dwindle. Jayce seemed content with just having him for now. That didn’t stop Jayce from joining in on the teasing. Now he had both of you in this lab. His golden darling, and you. Who was not his just yet. But he could want you to be. And for now that was enough. Because he saw how you were watching him and Jayce. He saw your lingering glances. Your weighted gaze on where their hands held each other. Something that lit a fire in himself and in Jayce. It resulted in some... testing this morning. Gauging your reaction to their actions and eyes. Seeing how beautifully red you could get just from their gentle teasing. It made some primitive part of him imagine what more hands on approaches could do to you. Discussions that he and Jayce indulged in when the wine gifted from Mel would find itself in their glasses.
That would come later, much later if it needed to. Today all they had were words and time. That shyness that swept across your face when you heard him call Jayce, Zlato. A pink gone crimson when you heard your own endearment. If you had asked why Viktor would have gladly answered. Even if he preferred to keep such close sentiments to himself, he knew your love for imagery. He knew that if he told you why he had picked those words that you would have been putty in his palm. Zlato and Broučku each had their own meanings that he had chosen to share and that he chose to keep private.
Zlato meant darling, but it also directly translated to gold. Jayce Talis was golden to him. His tan, his energy. Where you drew him as the sun personified, Viktor thought of him as starlight. As a continuous pulsing of energy that ebbed and flowed, lighting the night sky on Viktor’s late nights. Something to look for, to be excited to see. To watch glow and twinkle. That smile so bright as if he was lit from within. Stars he didn't always get to see back in Zaun. The smoke from Zaun and light pollution from Piltover sometimes blocked out those celestial lights. But Jayce was like that to him. Moving and changing, part of history in a way that not everyone quite understood. A gold dusting across space and time. Like gold, he was soft and malleable. Like gold, he was still strong and desired. Like gold, he shone in the sun. Like gold, he deserved to be taken care of. Like gold, Viktor wanted to wear him on his skin.
And you? There was brouček, which was cuter. Little beetle. But broučku fit you better, he thought. When he imagined you, your always working hands, there was a buzzing behind his neck. Deep and thrumming in his ears. You had wormed your way into his lab. His life. His heart. Had burrowed under his skin. An iridescent sheen in his mind when he thought of you. Something that had truly hit him that morning after you had mixed your paints in the lab. As a scientist he understood your explanation and preference for correct terminology. But your laugh warmed his chest and soothed the mental aches being in the lab brought him. He couldn't help himself. Especially after your note where you kept the silly name, had crossed out your own words just to call back to his misnomer.
You had become embedded in him without him realizing. Despite there being the closeness that he and Jayce had shared he was certain that you were a part of him. A kind of stability that your presence had offered that he took comfort in. Regardless of if you became entwined in the romance he and Jayce shared, he knew that you would be a sweet constant.
Viktor sees your mind processing the nicknames, sees how your cheeks are impossibly ruddy, sees the way you fidget with your hands. You had laughed and relaxed. Still, whatever limits you had it seemed that they were about to hit them, so he taps Jayce’s hand and gestures to their table. A silent “Let us work now.” When Jayce turns around he is barely hiding all the affection Viktor knows he holds. It pours from that smile, gleaming in those happy hazel eyes. And it fills Viktor’s chest with his own. He can hear the tense breath you let loose when they both face their table. He can only imagine how your shoulders must relax without their focus on you. Can not help the last look he gives you. His eyes are catching yours. Your own watering from laughter. Viktor almost speaks. But you smile at him and any words catch in his throat. So he offers his own and gets back to work. The soothing sounds of all three of you working plays in the background.
As the day continues like normal there is a burning that had settled in him. There was a tenderness in today’s teasing, yes. But something in Viktor had been awoken by all that blushing of yours. It means that when you call it an early night he only waits until the door shuts to tug on Jayce’s tie. His golden partner was looking over his shoulder at calculations. Jayce says nothing at the action, simply waits. Having been victim to Viktor’s teasing in almost all its forms he knew better than to react too quickly now.
“Perhaps we should call it a night too.” is all Jayce needs to hear to lean into Viktor’s back. Eyes closing when he feels Viktor rise to stand. There’s no straightening of notes before they leave. Just a silent walk back to their rooms. Lately they had spent most nights in Viktor’s room, the mattress more comfortable on his leg. Tonight they stop at Jayce’s door.
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Jayce sat on the bed patiently, his hand loosely fidgeting with the sheets as Viktor undresses. Jayce himself had already made it down to just his boxers, straining in the fabric just watching. An inaudible hitch in his throat when he sees how Viktor had loosened his tie. Two moles on the right side of his neck unveiling as the collar dipped open. Jayce can feel his own gaze travel down to those beautifully long fingers deftly working at buttons. Watching with a growing hunger. They had been so gentle and teasing this whole time they'd been together. More so before their talk to make it more. But tonight was different. And so he didn't want to forget a moment. He would catalogue it deep within his brain. Would make sure to remember every little thing he did right. Remember every movement Viktor made. A clearing throat pulls his gaze up.
Viktor’s small smug smile greeting him. Flushed cheeks. It's all he can do to not pull him down onto that bed right away. To kiss up and down every inch of the man before him. Instead, Jayce opens his arms wide. Asking. Pleading with his eyes, leaning forward without thinking. He tries to ignore the thumping of his heart. Jayce Talis was a lover. He was a man that had been with men and women, needed affection and to give it. Craved it. And with his partner here in his room that one simple fact about himself did not change. Only became exemplified. As soon as Viktor stepped between Jayce’s legs he could feel those tan arms wrap around his back. Feel them slide under the loose button up. Thick fingers splayed along his lower spine. He could feel Jayce’s lips trailing soft kisses, loving and slow up and down his stomach. The press of Jayce’s nose into his abdomen. Viktor wrapped his own arms around Jayce. He trailed his hands until they met with the nape of Jayce's neck. And how could he not chuckle at the sigh he heard in response? At the puff of air he felt in his skin as Jayce leaned into his touch and looked up through loving hazel eyes?
Jayce tries to stay focused, tries to not let the night become a blur of bodies and sensations. Leans into every kiss, committed to every action that has a taste and sound. Everytime his hands wander too low Viktor’s hands pull them away and up. When Viktor himself is only in his boxers he’s sitting in Jayce’s lap. Hands holding Jayce’s above his head, whispering about patience and behavior. Words that he wishes he could focus on. All he knows is that Viktor tastes like coffee today. Like home. Cold hands on his hot skin. Hips moving deep and slow, brushing against each other.
Viktor isn’t sure how long he’s kept Jayce at this point before he settles further down the bed. Trailing fingers over where Jayce has made a mess in his underwear. Reveling in the gasps Jayce can’t hide. In the way he twitches beneath the wet fabric. It’s deliciously pathetic. Makes him hungry. Lightheaded. When he fully presses his palm down Jayce curses, trying to stay still. A task quickly abandoned as Viktor continues to tease, until he’s panting and whining.
“Do you need more or could you finish like this?” Viktor’s voice is soft and admiring. A tone that is heavy with demand yet still asking. Jayce only nods, eyes barely open enough to see what Viktor’s doing. Crawling up for messy kisses and that hand never stops. “Vik I can’t, I’ll-” It takes an ear nip and a few well timed praises. A groan that rumbles deep in his chest, loud enough that Viktor can feel it in his own as a wet flood pulses through the fabric of Jayce’s boxers. He keeps moving, focusing on getting every last bit until he hears a whine.
"Can't wait anymore, let me touch you. Please. Let me make you feel good. " His voice is hoarse. Emotion that could be lust or love. It’s both but that didn't matter as his lips met skin and hands fumbled with the waistband of his underwear. "Wanna taste you. Can I?" Viktor just looked at him. A ring of amber barely visible around the blown pupils. Finally Jayce could feel that sense of pride. Drinking in every second of those mole and freckle covered shoulders heaving up and down. Loving every minute that he could be touching his partner. "Please V."
Viktor wants to deny him but impatient stuttering hips betray his resolve. He lifts them and nods, not trusting the voice rising in his throat to stay steady. Not when Jayce looks at him like that. Pouty kiss bitten lips parted to show that endearing tooth gap. He had no time to take in the cool air he’s suddenly exposed to. Jayce’s hands are already on him, pumping his length. All their heavy petting and grinding meant that it didn't take much to get him fully hard. So Jayce wastes no time in pushing him down, leaning forward on his knees. The pillows by his feet getting kicked off the bed as he settles and puts his mouth on Viktor. The hot muscle moving to make room and properly cradle the underside on each slow pass. Viktor could hide his first groan, but not the second.
Seeing Jayce’s brows furrowed together in concentration, those short thick lashes resting on the swell of Jayce’s cheeks. Especially not when Jayce hums as if he's content to be here of all places. Viktor can feel the back of his partners throat, kissing the head as Jayce tries to swallow around him. It's too much, too far and he wants to pull away. But Jayce is lifting Viktor’s hips. Pressing himself impossibly close, nose brushing against that patch of hair, taking in shaky breaths. His orgasm is fast. Too fast. Viktor can't warn him, all he can do is let his head lean back as he spasms. He can feel his leg twitch, a heel dogging into Jayce’s back, he can feel himself twitching as he cums. The wet heat of Jayce’s mouth staying there the whole time, slowing down his movements to draw it out as long as possible. When he finally pulls off Viktor is barely there. That bliss of another person warming his whole body. He can barely register the kisses on his inner thigh, just when they stop and he feels Jayce lay his head on a bony hip. Jayce hums when he feels Viktor's hands in his hair. A few strands stuck to his forehead, just getting his breathing together and they both relax.
“Again?” Viktor can feel Jayce pushing into his hand, head tilting to look up at him. Face so open and vulnerable, and absolutely drunk on the feeling of being there with each other.
“Incorrigible.” It doesn’t stop him from tightening the grip of his fingers in those dark brown locks.
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#personal pigments#arcane#viktor arcane#fanfiction#viktor league of legends#fanfic#x reader#viktor lol#jayvik#jayce talis#jayvik x reader#jayvik x you#smut
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🐸 “come here, hold my hand.”
request from my og @tusswrites! "come here, hold my hand.” “you’re washing the dishes.” “…i can do both…” with minghao? please i love this man and I’ll crumble if he says this to me 😭
pairing: minghao x gn!reader word count: 1k+ genre: fluff, slice of life (HELLO IT'S ME) rating: pg tags: pure fluff, physical touch as the love language, mundane stuff, household chores, request prompted washing the dishes so you will have washing the dishes, i try to make up a song warnings: none
a/n: finally found the random inspiration for this drabble that ended up with more than 1k words. purely self-indulgent. bear with me. as someone who always washes the dishes, i want this. bow.
. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ masterlist . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁
✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏
Minghao is a strong believer in physical touch as a love language.
Popular media doesn’t showcase this all too well because of the image and concept that has been formed around him. Still, physical touch is the love language that remains superior in his opinion. This means being able to reach out to the other person and hold them in any manner, being in proximity to them to express how you feel, and being in the same room with each other regardless of what you are doing.
He says it’s about having something tangible to hold—tactile in his hand and palpable on his body—and how he appreciates having the people around him to physically ground his thoughts and dreams that can soar as high as the heavens allow. It reminds him that he doesn’t just have his rational mind anchoring him down but also something and someone to help make sense of things.
Minghao, contrary to popular belief then, is actually a very clingy person.
Words are not and will never be his strong suit. Yes, he can write. Yes, his words are like poetry, like water flowing through the rough in cascades of emotion, but they only come out when the cup is full. On a day-to-day basis, Minghao expresses his love which can be felt even through the slightest brush of hands.
This is a fact that you learned almost immediately.
He comes home, wordless, whether to his place or your place, and the first thing he does is go in for a hug. No matter where you are or what you are doing, he forces you to stop so he can hug you for who knows how long, deeply, fully, and wholeheartedly—not that half-assed wraparound from the side that people excuse for a hug.
It’s a habit he started during a particularly trying time in his life. He would pull you closer and engulf you in his arms, burying you in his scent as he buries himself in the crook of your neck or the crown of your head.
Naturally, during a particularly trying time in your life this time, you picked up his habit easily and did the same to him.
Scientific studies show that a 20-second hug is enough to release oxytocin that can lower stress levels and improve quality of life. Whatever the research says, you and Minghao do agree that this little practice has made your lives easier and more bearable than they used to be.
Recently though, you always end up missing each other at home. He would come home late nights and early mornings after schedules to find you sound asleep in your bed, while you would wake up a few hours later to his sleeping form recovering from the previous day’s demands. You’d come home one too many days to a space devoid of his comforting presence, and the same could be said for him.
It happens, you think. It’s absolutely normal. Being this busy just means that both your lives are taking a turn for the better, right?
But still, you miss him, despite coming home to each other every day. You miss the simple act of sharing your silence together and you miss the way his touches would simultaneously calm you down but also keep you on your toes.
Today, you couldn’t help but feel lonelier than usual as you set your jacket and bag down to be greeted by a dark apartment room. Based on his last message a few hours ago, Minghao was still in the studio practicing. He sent a selca with the other performance unit boys and you don’t deny how you stared at his sweaty hair and bare smiling face for a minute longer than you thought you did.
But you had a good day at work, where everything just worked out the way you wish every day would, and you absolutely will not let anything rain on your small moment of happiness. No, not even the mess of a room you left this morning and not the pile of dishes you didn't realize remained unwashed this morning.
So you turn on the speakers and press play on a song that has Minghao’s voice fill the empty space. It was one of his unreleased demos for his recent solo EP. It was a shame because this was your favorite from his endless roster of songs—a song where the lyrics talked about how the most mundane of moments could be the most special if you had your love’s hand to hold.
You started on the dishes and got lost in the process almost meditatively in the menial task. It was enough to startle you when you heard your name from behind you. You see him in fresh clothes and slightly damp hair, a clean scent emanating from his presence.
“When did you get home?” You asked in reply to your most favorite voice in the world.
“Just now,” Minghao instinctively reached out to latch onto your waist, easily letting your gravity pull him to you in your natural ritual of finding purchase in each other's nooks and crannies. As if you were two puzzle pieces fitting perfectly, he molds his body against yours with his chest flush to your back and his hands folding on the flat of your stomach.
He breathed in your scent and you felt his smile against your temple. Instantaneously, you relax against his touch as he says against your ear, “I missed you.”
You turn to find his lips, softly pressing yours against them and repeating his words to him. With a smile, you continue your reply with a melody to your voice. “Come here, hold my hand.”
You feel his chuckles with his cheek pressed on yours when he says, “But you’re washing the dishes.”
“I can do both.”
So he does, intertwining one of his hands with yours—albeit awkwardly—and helping you finish the chore in front of you. His soft giggles mingle with yours as you two find a rhythm to washing the dishes among four working hands.
You two stay in this position for a while with the song still playing in the background, the lyrics resounding as you sway in time with the rhythm.
“Come here, hold my hand, pull me in, and let me orbit around your gravity…”
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post a/n: still from my little drabble request game and still accepting requests! all you gotta do is shoot an ask <3
#chanranghaeys writes#thediamondlifenetwork#mansaenetwork#svthub#Hiraya-M#seventeen#svt#seventeen fic#svt x reader#seventeen x reader#svt x y/n#svt x you#seventeen x you#seventeen drabble#seventeen headcanons#seventeen imagines#seventeen scenarios#svt fluff#svt smut#svt angst#svt hurt#minghao#the8#seo myungho#xu minghao#svt the8#seventeen the8#the8 x reader#the8 x you#the8 x y/n
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— ☆ 𝐂𝐔𝐑𝚰𝐎𝐒𝚰𝐓𝐘 𝐊𝚰𝐋𝐋𝐒
𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: you’ve seen lucifer’s demon form but you can’t shake the feeling that’s it’s not all he is. what if there was something darker beneath his beautiful visage? you ask to see more but lucifer warns you it may be too much for mortal eyes. as he slowly unveils the facets of his true self, you wonder if you can love something incomprehensible? and more importantly, can it love you back?
𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: OM!LUCIFER x GN!reader, SFW but slightly suggestive, DARK ROMANCE ♥️, HORROR ELEMENTS, implied sex but no smut, established relationship but in the earlier stages, light angst, celestial war mention, he calls you ‘my dear’, demon x human, monster romance(?), ik my title is ‘curiosity kills’ but i promise no one dies 2.0k wc. | masterlist
𝐚/𝐧: woo! my first fic for 2025. halloween is long gone but spookyookyooky vibes are forever. i haven't written for lucifer (or the obey me fandom) since 2021 so please be kind! i love when artists draw the demons as monster-like so it inspired me to write this
reblogs and interactions are always appreciated ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
They say curiosity killed the cat but nobody ever warns you what happens when the thing you seek is something you love. Sometimes curiosity doesn’t just kill, it pulls you into the depths and reminds you that some paths were never meant to be tread at all.
You knew Lucifer’s demon form. Every time he brought it out, you couldn’t miss it. No one did. Those horns curling from his head, those raven wings that stretched with an elegance befitting for the pride incarnate, the diamond birthmark adorning his forehead. He looked every inch the fallen angel. Dangerous. Powerful. But still akin to something recognisable. Something human. That was what you thought his “demon form” meant, or at least the extent of it.
But the closer you got to him, emotionally, physically—you started to suspect there’d be more. This was Lucifer, after all. The same Morning Star who watched the Celestial Realm itself fracture, the one who waged war and defied his own Father for his sister’s sake. Of course, there would be layers to him, parts that are hidden beneath polished veneers that he might not want you to see.
The revelation came gradually, though not accidentally. He’d never risk an accident with something like this. It wasn’t just about protecting you, it was also about managing what it would mean for him to be fully seen.
It began one night in his room. His usual form was already on display, horns casting long shadows on the walls as his wings arched lazily behind him. You were comfortable with this version of him, so much so that you’d leaned into his shoulder, tracing his horns absentmindedly as he read aloud from some aged, prodigious book. The question had been on your mind but you didn’t realise what you’d said until the words were out of your mouth.
“Is there more?” You asked concretely.
He stilled, halting his finger mid-sentence against the page. “More?” his voice was neutral like always.
“Of… this,” you gestured vaguely at him. “Your form. You expect me to believe this is the Avatar of Pride’s only face?”
The jest was meant to lighten the mood, but he didn’t laugh. Instead, he closed the book and turned his gaze on you. His eyes burned a little brighter—sharper. “What you see now is what I allow you to see. There are parts of me not meant for human eyes,” he said softly.
“So you’ve locked those parts away?”
“Not locked,” he corrected you. “Contained. Managed.”
That should have been the end of it but you couldn’t let it go. Not after seeing a flicker of hesitation in his face. Or perhaps it was fear. So you would’ve let it go until you wondered:
What could possibly unnerve Lucifer?
———
The first time he showed you, it was brief. Something of a test.
“Don’t move,” he instructed, “and don’t look away.”
You stood in his study, your heart pounding as he stepped back, seeing his usual form dissolve into something more. His wings expanded, shifting like spilled ink on water. His horns lengthened, spiraling like gnarled roots of an oak tree, and his skin took on a strange sheen, as though it couldn’t decide whether it was flesh or something far older.
But it was his eyes that terrified you. The whites were gone, replaced by an endless, tormenting black. You felt like you were being pulled into them, swallowed by the power of something vast and unknowable.
However, there was also heat that felt familiar, pressing into you like his breath fanning over your skin in the dead of night, when his hands explored every crevice on your body. This form, alien as it was, still carried the same possessive hunger. You had to grip onto the edge of a nearby table to steady yourself.
And then, as quickly as it came, it receded. His wings folded back, his horns shrank and his eyes returned to that familiar crimson. “Enough for tonight,” you were assailed by the sound of his shoes clicking against the hardwood as he made his way to you.
Something, he thought, was not quite right. You were shaken, yes, but not disturbed. He had expected you to avert your eyes, to flinch or look away lest the weight of his true form crush your sanity. Yet you watched him with defiance in your expression and more unsettling still, he found himself watching you back. What was it that kept you here? What had driven you to face something so unnatural and still hold your ground?
———
The second time was different.
You were sitting at the edge of his bed with your legs tucked beneath you. His shirt hung loosely on your frame as the scent of him clung to the fabric. Much like other nights, you’d spent this one wrapped around each other until exhaustion claimed you both.
Lucifer suddenly tugged at his shirt and after your eyes fell on him, you felt something gnawing in your stomach. But you were surprised when he only asked with a casual cadence,
“Do you trust me?”
You nodded like it was perfectly normal to place your earnest trust in a demon like him. You’d already given yourself to him in every way that mattered, baring your soul just as he had bared his body to you time and time again.
Fond with your answer, he stood up and smiled. “Then close your eyes.”
When you opened them, the world felt…wrong.
What you saw had to have been a dream-picture because his form was towering enough to barely fit the space and his wings no longer looked like they belonged to anything earthly. The feathers were shifting, like they had been replaced by shards of black glass catching onto nonexistent light. His horns gleamed like molten metal and his face wasn’t entirely his. It was flickering between the Lucifer you knew and something you couldn’t name but felt in the deepest part of your being.
The diamond on his forehead began to glow, its light blotting shapes in all angles. And then it split, revealing a vertical slit of an unblinking eye that stared into you—not at you, but into you, through you.
Somewhere in between you must’ve hauled yourself onto the floor and stumbled back because your knees were not on the mattress anymore but on wood. A pressure built in your chest but you simply couldn’t look away.
Lucifer didn’t speak, he just watched you like before but this time you felt as though every secret you’d ever buried was laid bare. It wasn’t until he eventually spoke your name that you realised you were crying.
“Breathe,” he said, kneeling before you. His voice was echoing like it was coming from inside you. “I told you it wasn’t meant for human eyes. We can stop.”
“It’s okay, it’s just…a lot,” you said, trembling but not from the cold.
He approached you, his hand eerily warm against your cheek as he wiped your tears and helped you to your feet. “You’re doing better than most would. I’m proud of you.”
“Does it ever hurt?” you swallowed hard, like there was rough rope lodged down your throat. The change was not as graceful as you thought it would be. It came ripping out of him like it was something he constantly suppressed.
“No,” you heard a break of vulnerability in his display. “But it can be lonely.”
“Lonely?”
“It is a grave reminder that demons exist to fear. Sometimes to worship. But never to love.”
Never to love because defending love was what made him this way.
Once respite had settled, a look of sullen reflection had overcome Lucifer’s face, wondering if this left you with little desire to see more.
———
Before the third time came, he warned you about the strain it might put on your mind, “This time might be dangerous.” But you insisted and he remained cautious.
When it happened, it wasn’t in the confines of his room but outside, beneath the yawning void of the Devildom’s starless sky. He told you it would be safer this way. For both of you.
His transformation hit you like a violent wind. Lucifer didn’t just change, he expanded uncontainably into something monstrous, his body shimmering like a dark mirage. His horns were jagged spires, sharp enough to cleave through the Celestial Palace itself and you couldn’t see where his wings ended and began—only that they were folding and unfolding like obsidian knives.
Then, there was his mouth that stretched wider than it should have, revealing rows of teeth too sharp, too numerous. They weren’t made for smiling, they were meant to tear and consume, a predator’s maw lurking beneath his visage. And his eyes—or the absence of them—were blackened husks whilst the unblinking eye on his forehead sat like an all-seeing sigil.
Shadows pulsed into your vision, pooling at your feet and reaching for you like they knew your name. The sheer magnitude of Lucifer’s form left you breathless. If this was the strength of someone who served second to Diavolo, then what maddening power must the Prince of the Devildom truly possess? And beyond even that, the Demon King himself—origin of all darkness. The thought had chills coiling around your spine and you thanked the Heavens he was resting in his indefinite slumber.
Yet strangely, in all that horror, there was beauty. Lucifer’s voice called to you like a melody and his vibrating presence, for all its terror, might have even felt soothing. It was magnificent.
“Are you afraid?” he asked from everywhere and nowhere. A question that wasn’t meant to frighten but rather a lifeline, a chance to retreat before you fell any deeper.
You should have been. Any rational being would have been. But instead, you took a step closer and reached out to the impossibility of his form. You touched something, though whether it was his face, his chest, or his soul, you weren’t sure.
“No,” you said between awe and surrender. “Never.”
At that moment, you understood what it meant to love a creature who stood at the precipice of an existence that could shatter you with mere thought.
“You are the first to see this and not run. You reach for the flame, knowing it will burn you,” he spoke like the deep roll of a bell.
“How could I not?” You didn’t step back, what was left of your willpower rooted you to the ground. “You’ve never been anything less than this. I could feel it.”
For a fleeting second, you saw the disintegration of his monstrous form, red eyes flickering through black ones as his pride briefly softened in the quiet between you. His wings faltered, a deep inhuman sigh escaping his lips. It was the first time you'd seen him so... uncertain.
“You think you know me so well? They say I am nothing but contradictions. Do you think love could redeem something like me? I could destroy you without meaning to,” this time he laughed but you knew this wasn’t anything he found funny. In fact, it hurt him to think there was any part of him that could cause you to recoil from the truth of what he was.
“But you haven’t because you don’t want to.” Again, his figure quickly distorted into something you were more familiar with. “Has it ever crossed your mind that I never wanted perfection, Lucifer?”
“Then what is it you want from me, if not to run?”
Your heart wound tight, it wasn’t difficult to tell him but you weren’t entirely sure if he’d even believe it. “Just you.”
He said nothing whilst your nostrils flared. “Just you,” you repeated.
Lucifer's unblinking eye narrowed, its glow dimming just slightly as if your words had managed to reach that inscrutable part of him. “You walk the line between courageous and naive, my dear.”
“Then I suppose it’s naive of me to hope you’re walking with me.”
A faint pause. His wings shimmered behind him, his hesitation was palpable but not binding. “If you would dare to take such steps, then you will not tread alone.”
It was resolute, his words settling like an oath.
Curiosity, they said, kills the cat. But in this case, it didn't. It brought you to a place you'd never thought you'd find. Lurking in the darkness of his true form, where love had no place for so long, you found the first glint of light.
A dark, dangerous light, but a light nonetheless.
© 2024 grimmweepers — do not repost, copy, translate, modify my work on any platform.
more a/n: i’m fascinated by eldritch/lovecraftian horror, can you tell?
divider: @/adornedwithlight
networks: @pixelcafe-network @houseofsolisoccasum
tagging you bc you kindly asked eep @sugurouge
#☾ grimmweepers#hide and queue#<- because i scheduled this LOL#obey me shall we date#obey me nightbringer#omswd#obey me lucifer x reader#om lucifer x reader#omswd lucifer#om lucifer#obey me lucifer x mc#obey me lucifer x you#omswd x reader#obey me oneshot#house of solis occasum#demon x human#demon x reader#monster romance
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Baxter Ward Neighbor AU!
When Baxter moved into his apartment in Prism Vista, the space across the hall was occupied by an older man. He wasn't impolite, he was never rude, but he wasn't friendly either. They exchanged tight, perfunctory smiles with him in the hall, maybe a nod every once in a while -- and that was fine with him.
But then the old man moved out, in with a child of his, he'd heard. And you moved in.
And you were ... well, you were different.
Baxter had gotten used to keeping anyone and everyone in his life at arm's length, especially the people he had to interact with regularly, but for some reason, that simply was not good enough for you.
"Some people might think I'm a little annoying or whatever," you'd admitted to him one day when you showed up at his door with a plate of fresh baked cookies. "But I'm not trying to be, I'm just trying to be nice. It feels good to be nice, you know?"
He'd wanted to say a number of things as he accepted the gift. Things he would have said when he was younger, flirty little meaningless things to make you feel good and to make himself feel like he mattered. "You're not annoying, you're adorable," something like that.
But that was then, and grown-up, closed-off Baxter simply gave you a small smile and a plain, easy truth -- "I appreciate it very much."
No matter how little he gave of himself, you seemed to have no problem giving him more and more of you in return. Months went by, months filled with homemade dessert drop-offs, chatty elevator rides, the occasional exchange of a screwdriver. Neighborly things.
He became used to it, and then he grew fond of it. Not enough to inspire him to pursue things further, but enough that he started to feel a dull sort of ache, a pang of some sort of missing when he went too long without seeing your smile.
It wasn't until nearly a year after you'd moved in that he finally admitted to himself that maybe, possibly, he could let himself want more.
One Wednesday morning, he'd gotten himself ready for work, going through the old familiar motions. He made it out to the parking garage, operating on autopilot, until he saw you leaning against your car, tears in your eyes. It was the first time since he'd met you that he'd seen you upset, and he immediately felt the urge to make it better.
"Are you all right?" he asked you, slowly approaching you.
"No. It's my car, it won't start. It's ... I don't know, it's been making some dumb noise and now it won't do anything, and I'm going to be late for work, and then my boss --"
"I'll give you a ride."
The offer was out of his mouth before he knew it, but of course he meant it: if it would make you feel better, he'd do it. If it might make you smile again.
You shook your head, starting to refuse, but he unlocked his car, parked a couple of spaces down, and opened the passenger door with a flourish.
"Baxter ..." you said, hesitant to let him do this relatively easy thing for you for reasons he didn't understand.
But he wanted to, with a desperation he hadn't felt in years. And in realizing that, he felt something spring to life inside him. A kind of hope that he hadn't felt in years, a little feeling that maybe he could actually, truly get close to someone again. That maybe this time he could stay.
"Let's go," he said softly, a little more of a demand than a request.
If he had his way, he'd have started to crack you open right then. Get into your head, find all the things that make you tick, all the little details about where you came from and what you've done. Your hopes and fears and regrets, what little bits of nature and nurture had woven themselves together to make you so kind and good.
But for now, he reasoned, a neighborly favor would do.
#our life beginnings and always#our life#baxter ward#our life baxter#baxter x reader#baxter x you#baxter ward x reader#olba baxter#baxter ward x you#olba#baxter ward i'll always love you
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I'll Call You Mine
Myoui Mina x Reader
a/n: a little post-holiday girl in red inspired fluff for @keervah just because 🤭 I’m sorry it took so long and I hope you’ll like it 🙈
“Rainy days and bad luck come in my way. I look for you when I’m lost so I don’t go insane”
“Aw fuck!”
You curse at the sky as you feel huge drops of rain fall on your face. You grumble to yourself. Of course it’s today of all days that it rains! 29% chance of rain this week and it’s when you’re already late, tired, and cold. You’re already halfway to the bus station and you can’t risk going back home to get an umbrella ‘cause you’re already running late.
You brisk walk all the way to the bus station as the patter of rain starts to pick up. You glance at your watch, five more minutes before the bus arrives, and you heaved a sigh. Everywhere looks so festive, it’s Christmas eve after all and people are enjoying the holidays. You watched them miserably because today you have been called to report to work because your co-worker had an “emergency” and your supervisor was either stupid or favors your co-worker that they didn’t say anything and called you over.
You honestly could’ve said “no” since it was a last minute notice, but you work in healthcare and also needed the extra cash because you’ve been eyeing a cute sweater and a lego set you wanted to buy for your longtime crush, Mina. You smiled as you thought about your adorable introvert. You weren’t officially dating but you’re sure there was something between you because of the way Mina’s eyes shine when she sees you or how she lets loose her cute laughter and her gummy smile just for you. You’ve been going on cute little dates for months now and you remembered Mina’s kid-like excitement when you both saw that humongous Hogwarts lego set at a store you passed by. You secretly took note of that because Mina and legos and Mina building legos and Mina’s little happy dance - you were full on smiling now and felt warm because of the thought.
A loud honk shook you out of your reverie as the bus stopped in front of you and you can feel yourself slipping to your previous bad mood once again. You sat near the window and looked out in disbelief. Of course the rain stopped when you’re finally inside. It’s like the universe is testing your patience today. You decided to text Mina, just to lighten your mood a bit even though you have to inform her that you can’t spend Christmas eve together because of work. Mina, bless her beautiful soul, replied in an instant and you just about melted. She sent you a photo of her in a Christmas sweater holding a yule log with a text saying “Let’s eat this together when you get back and go to the Christmas market after.”
You were restless at work and you catch yourself glancing at the clock almost every few minutes. It’s pretty late and you’re sure Mina’s having dinner with her family already. Your goal was to go straight to the store after your shift on Christmas morning to buy that lego set and spend the rest of Christmas day with her. You’re in a brighter mood just thinking about how happy it will make her and you used that thought to fuel you for the rest of your shift. You received a text from Mina a few hours before midnight, “Merry Christmas, y/n. I wish you were here so tonight. I can’t wait to see you tomorrow morning!” She was so cute and it got you all giddy! You sent her an apology and told her you’d want to spend Christmas eve with her too but you assured her that tomorrow will be a fun day for the both of you. Her swift reply came, “I can’t wait! Good luck with the rest of your shift. I’ll see you tomorrow,” with a kissy face photo of her attached. You felt your cheeks heat up and you were trying to suppress a giggle. She’s the most adorable person ever! Now you’re more determined and happy thinking that this extra shift was all worth it when you see her tomorrow.
Finally, an hour left before your shift ends. You send the store a quick message asking to wrap up the Hogwarts lego set and sent them the payment. This way, you just need to drop by to get it and save you time. You can’t wait to spend your first Christmas with Mina! A few minutes passed and you received a text from your supervisor and your mood darkened incredibly. The employee assigned after your shift could not make it and there isn’t anyone else available to take over so you need to stay for their shift, which unfortunately for you is a double shift.
You can feel your temper rising. You wanted to scream and curse at someone but you really had no choice, it’s not like you’d be able to just leave your work and leave your patients to tend to themselves. You were in a very terrible mood as you counted the hours and realized you’d be missing the Christmas market when your shift ends because it closes early for their last day. You type out a message to your supervisor begging them to find someone to at least cover half the shift you’re forced to do. You had plans today and you feel like everything is ruined and you don’t even know what to tell Mina.
Your heart was heavy as your supposed shift ended and the new one started. As if on cue, Mina texted you good morning and that she couldn’t wait to see you. You were devastated and the festive mood long gone. You were disappointed at yourself for promising so much and not being able to make good on it, especially since this is Mina. You sent her an apology and an explanation not really in the mood anymore. Of course, because this is Mina, she understood and told you she’d still be waiting to spend Christmas with you no matter when your shift ends. You send out a halfhearted reply and another apology before burying your phone deep in your pocket not wanting to send more false promises. You informed the lego store of your predicament and the store owner asked if you’d want to pick it up at their residence instead if you don’t make it before the store closes. You say yes and thank them, thankful that their address is close to Mina’s. At least you can pick it up along the way.
The rest of the day was a blur. In the end, no one arrived to split your shift with you and it made you feel numb. It was already dark when the next person came in for the shift after yours. You sluggishly got ready to leave and sent both the store owner and Mina that you were on your way and apologized for how late it was. Thankfully the travel back was uneventful although you were really devastated as you watch people heading home with smiles on their faces.
Only a few more hours ‘til Christmas was over and you feel salty for only having that amount of time with Mina. You knew yourself well enough that you might end up ruining this night with her because you really are in a terrible mood and didn’t wanna see her disappointed face. So as you walked towards the store owner’s house you contemplated on just giving your Christmas gift and heading home.
You thanked the store owner as he gave you the huge box and apologized for the trouble. He was still all smiles and wished you Merry Christmas before you went on your way. A couple of houses before Mina’s you stopped and texted her that you’re almost at her door and wanted to give her something. You kept walking afterwards even after you felt your phone vibrate from her reply. You spotted her sitting at the foot of their porch. All wrapped in an oversized sweater and an elf hat sitting atop her head. Your heart warmed at the sight but guilt kept you from being truly happy to see her.
But Mina, known for her introverted and calm demeanor, just about beamed and ran when she spotted you. She enveloped you in a hug before dragging you to the door. You smiled halfheartedly and stopped her. You wanted to say you’re just there to give her a Christmas present and leave, but before you can even get anything out she looked at you sternly and said, “Nope. You’re staying. I prepared a bath for you and warm clothes and a surprise. So you’re staying. Got that?” You looked at her and can’t decide whether to smile or get scared because she looks so adorable with her elf hat and furrowed brows. All you were able to do was nod and utter a small “yes, ma’am” before she gave you a gummy smile and pushed you inside the house.
Mina just realized you were holding a gigantic box when you’re finally inside the house and gave you a questioning look. You chuckled lightly, “This is your Christmas present and I wanna see you open it.” Mina smiled at you widely, “Okay but first a warm bath! I know you’re really tired so take your time and relax. The clothes are in the bathroom, go” she pushed you towards the bathroom as she dragged out the last syllables. You were surprised with what you saw inside. The bathroom smells like peppermint and there were candles that cast a warm glow. An assortment of Christmas themed bath bomb were by the tub and a pair of fluffy pajamas and sweater were by the counter. You can already feel yourself relaxing and your mood lifting as you take in the scene before you.
You took your time in the bath as you were trying to shake off your bad mood because Mina has been trying to cheer you up. You got dressed and was drying your hair when you stopped and stared at the mirror. You didn’t notice it at first but the sweater you’re wearing has a huge penguin wearing a Santa hat. You can’t help but giggle now and hugged yourself thinking of how this is the sweetest gesture you’ve gotten. Finally in a better mood than when you first arrived.
You excited the bathroom and made your way to the living room to see Mina in a similar outfit placing two mugs of what smells like hot chocolate on the table. She looked at you and cooed at how adorable you are in your outfit. “I knew it would suit you!” She said as she straightened up and you saw her sweater has a huge black cat with a red scarf looped around its neck. “It’s me and you,” she said shyly as she saw you looking back and forth at her sweater and yours “Do you like it?” She asked as she batted her eyes at you. You smiled a genuine smile for the first time that day and enveloped her in a hug. “I love it so much!” You said against her hair and she giggled.
She made you sit on the couch and gave you a mug of hot chocolate with little marshmallows on them before disappearing into the kitchen. She returned with the yule log and a couple of forks in her hand and placed it in front of you. “It’s still Christmas after all,” she said as she picked up her own mug and sat beside you placing her head on your shoulder. You put your mug down and held her. “I’m sorry I was in a bad mood earlier,” you started “I just really wanted to spend our first Christmas together the best way. I know how much you wanted to see the lights and decor around the Christmas market and we weren’t even able to go.” She looked at you lovingly then and cuddled closer, “But we are spending the Christmas the best way. It doesn’t matter that it’s a little late, at least you’re here now. And besides, I have another surprise for you!” She suddenly stood up and placed her mug on the table before putting her hand out to help you up.
She dragged you to her bedroom door, mischief dancing in her eyes as she looked at you. “I knew you were sad that we didn’t get go enjoy the pretty Christmas scene so….” She then opened the door and you stare at everything in awe. “I just brought them here for you.” She finished quietly. You took in the whole room as you entered. Christmas lights were strewn on the ceiling and a small Christmas tree sat on her dresser decorated with cute ornaments and fake snow. Fairy lights cascaded over the shelves, the window, and her headboard. Everything looks so magical that it took your breath away. “Mina…” you let out her name in a whisper, words failing you with how sweet and wonderful her surprise is. You look at her beside you and her eyes were shining and expectant as she looks at your glowing face. You held her close, kissed her forehead, and whispered, “Thank you. This is the best Christmas ever.” She giggled and hugged you tightly before pulling back a little. She stared at you shyly this time and pointed upwards.
You look up and saw a mistletoe and you felt your face heat up. She was so adorable with her mischievous eyes and her shy smile that you can’t help but giggle and give her a small smirk. She hit you playfully before standing on her tiptoes, you pulled her in for your first kiss. It was chaste and warm and perfect. Just like your Mina. “You’re what I want for Christmas, y/n. And I hope you want me too,” she said with so much love and adoration that you thought your heart was gonna burst. You leaned in for another kiss as words are not enough to tell her how much you want this too. You stopped to catch your breath and rested your forehead against hers. “You’re mine.” You said against her lips and she giggled.
“Now how are you gonna top my best Christmas gift ever?” She playfully teased and you lit up, excited to give her the lego set you bought. “Come see,” you smirked at her, “I’m sure you’d love it” you said as you took her hand and led her out to the living room again. You moved the small table to make way and sat on the carpeted floor before placing the box in front of you. You gestured for her to sit on the opposite side and told her to open it.
You can’t decide which was better, her heartfelt confession earlier or how she was squealing like a little girl right now. Like you imagined, she was as excited and as giddy as a little kid on Christmas morning. You were beaming as you watch her take out the pieces and tried to hug the huge box against her. “BEST GIFT EVER” you heard her muffled exclamation. You laughed and pried the box off of her hands before teasingly said, “better than me being yours?” Her eyebrows shot up so fast, eyes wide but also teasing. “Nope! I’ll always call you mine.” She said with a grin.
You spent the rest of the night drinking hot chocolate and building the lego. You can’t help but think then that there isn’t any other way you wanna spend Christmas.
#myoui mina x reader#mina x reader#myoui mina#twice#twice fluff#twice fanfic#twice mina#twice mina fanfic#mina fanfic#mina fluff#kpop gg x reader#gg x reader#gg imagines#gg fanfic#sseulforgii~wordvomit#girl group imagines#girl group scenarios#kpop girl group#twice imagines
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college boyfr! choso
sfw hcs; not proofread
sociology major minor in child and adolescent development
he just wants know all about people and why they are the way they are!!
chad minor inspired by his younger brother yuuji
works at the daycare on campus taking care of kids of the staff (does art lessons with them!)
he's also an ra for the dorms on campus (meaning he has his own room!!)
met him when you were coming home from a party and he was doing rounds in the dorms
saw that you were a little too under the influence and walked you to your dorm that night
woke up to you knocking on his door the next morning offering to buy him coffee as a thank you
he was smitten ever since
very artsy and creative
he's a member of the ceramics club on campus
a lot of his gifts for you are different jewelry dishes or trinket holders he made
sometimes he'll ask you to come to the ceramics studio and hang out with him while he works
if everyone is out of the studio, he'll do that thing where he'll sit behind you and help you work your hands on the clay to mold it on the wheel
he's a frequent buyer of geto’s (campus plug)
feels that smoking helps him get his creative juices flowing
when you first started dating, you took a peek in his sketchbook only to find pages of you drawn in it
apparently he had seen you around the dorms long before you saw him (he was just too nervous to make a move)
if he leaves before you to go to class when you sleep over, he leaves little sticky note doodles for you to wake up to
has lots of piercings (a bridge nose piercing most importantly) and secretly super tatted underneath all the baggy sweaters he wears (likes it when you color them in)
favorite date with you is taking you out for a picnic
he finds it relaxing just sitting with you in a field with the breeze blowing softly
moments like that are when he feels most at peace
#lovekawa.headcanons#lovekawa.collegeau#jjk#jjk x reader#choso kamo#jjk choso#choso x reader#jujutsu kaisen choso#choso jjk#kamo choso#nanami#nanami x reader#nanami kento#jjk nanami#jujutsu nanami#choso#gojo#geto#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#jjk gojo#gojo x reader#jujutsu gojo#jujustu kaisen#satoru#satoru gojo#geto suguru#jjk geto#geto x reader#jujutsu geto
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When the morning comes your still mine
Warnings: whistle trained reader, somewhat toxic relationship?? Reader has no will-power I mean immediately goes back into Sevika’s arms, public sex, dark and ooc! Sev, humiliation, Sev is packing and her strap is referred to as cock, degradation (reader is called a bitch and refers to herself as a mindless bimbo), I’m lowkey gaslighting reader too LMAOO
Genre: smut, angst with the little plot I put in here
A/N: inspired by the copious domestic Sevika content I’ve been taking in and pretty little birds by SZA and @wingedcrowpersona
Reader is a stripper!!
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Divorce wasn’t something you saw with you and Sevika but it’s your reality.
It was like one morning was different, the arguing didn’t matter, the makeup sex wasn’t working. You still wanted her but you didn’t need her.
You fell back into your old routine; get up, practice, hangout, work, hangout, sleep. Anything that stops you from thinking. Your marriage was lovely till it wasn’t, never agreeing with Silcos influence on your wife.
Music was blaring, lights were flashing and slightly tipsy you didn’t know where you were walking. This plus six inch platform heels caused disaster.
You fell right into her arms.
She was still as beautiful as ever and you know she thought the same about you. You also knew you were trapped.
Her mechanic hand squeezing the small of your back as she helps you up. “You look good” she states as she pops the string of your thong.
Immediately you swat her hand away, “don’t touch me like that.” You state crossing your arms. Vika always teased you whether you liked it or not.
Slowly she almost stalks to you, “is that how you treat your wife?”
“Not my wife anymore that’s how divorce works.”
“Not divorced if you didn’t sign the papers doll.” She said as she cups your face and brings you close. “For one second could you behave? Be my good little wife again?” Instinctively you nod missing how mean she could be, “I could fuck you right here and you’d like that mhm?”
“I’m on the clock!” You whine remembering where you are.
“I’ll pay you” she says flatly as one of her fingers dip into the front of your thong.
“Sevika wait” you gasp and you press yourself closer trying to make sure no one in the club could see you.
You grab her wrist about to deny yourself of pleasure until Sevika let’s out a short loud whistle. You let go of her wrist, stand up straight and look at her with doe eyes.
“Still my bitch I see” she says as she slowly rubs circles on your pretty clit. You can’t help but moan and obey because that’s what Sevika deserves, a mindless bimbo wife.
Legs shaking due to embarrassment and pleasure you step closer to her to balance yourself. Another whistle was let out and you open your legs more, giving her thick finger more access to you.
“I should embarrass you, since you embarrassed me.” She scoffs, “thinking you aren’t mine, my wife.”
You shake your head no but it didn’t really matter. She knew you wanted this, she knows how much you missed her.
Sevika maneuvers you two to a booth, pulling you by your thong strap. She’s seated whilst your standing.
“C’mon dance, entertain me.” She mutters as she lights a cigar blowing it in your direction knowing you hate smoke. Sevika is never this hard on you but you left her, you did this to yourself.
Slowly you dance to the music, touching yourself here and there in the process. Naturally you strip not caring who saw because it was about your wife’s pleasure. Once you were bare she whistles and you sit on her lap. Sevika puts the cigar out and holds your face, smoke escaping her mouth. “I missed you”, her whisper sincere and hurt. “Not as much as I.” You mumble before you softly press your lips against hers.
Her tongue slithers your mouth. She missed how you taste, how you feel so much. How could you deprive this from her?
Your pierced nipples rub against hers and you go to unbuckle her pants. Like a good bitch you wait for the whistle, her wanting to see how patience you could be. Once granted permission you are able to slip her inside with a satisfactory squelch from your dripping cunt.
Her hands were harsh on your hips and your pelvis was burning but none of the mattered as you kissed your wife. Didn’t matter who was watching or if you’d feel shame tomorrow because that’s the effect she has on you.
Both of you desperate for each other are rutting against each other ready to cum. Saliva is dripping from your tongues, hair is frizzy and fucked, both of your moans are loud and desperate.
She just wants her wife back, wants to take care of you again. Fucks you into never thinking about leaving her again.
With one final thrust you shakily cum, and ride your orgasm out together.
“Can I take you home?” She whispers her eyes looking like hurt puppy dogs. “Let’s go home.”
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A/N: oh my gosh!! I need to be whistle trained by her!! She’s so hot why isn’t she real (ˊ̥̥̥̥̥ ³ ˋ̥̥̥̥̥)
Taglist: @manfuckthisimout @bambishaven
(Dividers- @dollywons)
#dazeduties#dividers by dollywons#black! reader#sapphic smut#sevika x reader#darkdoilie#sevika smut#sevsdoilie#sevika x black! reader#ex wife! Sevika#ex wife! reader#stripper! reader#I’d do more than ride her in a club#to be dragged by my thong!!#dark!sevika#poppetteanswers#scared femme writes
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drabble time!! this is inspired by a conversation I had with @esperjester and @arternestkirkland over in the usukus lounge.
Here's a little usukus in the context of CanWales and ScotFra dragging England along to their couples activities 🤭
🇺🇸 ~ 💚 ~ 🇬🇧 ~ 💙 ~ 🇺🇸 ~ 💚 ~ 🇬🇧 ~ 💙 ~ 🇺🇸 ~ 💚 ~ 🇬🇧 ~ 💙 ~ 🇺🇸 ~ 💚
“England?”
“Huh?” The addressed nation lightly shakes his head. He had zoned out completely and stared at the plastic clip of the ballpoint pen in his hands that was about to break off- oh. Nevermind. The pen clatters when it drops on the table next to the broken off clip.
Before England can answer France, who looks at him expectantly and way too cheerfully - making England knit his brows together in a frown -, Scotland takes over the conversation. “Franny asked if yer comin’ for brunch this weekend,” he clarifies, shooting his brother a reprobative look.
“Of course he’s joining!” England turns his head to his left where Wales apparently made the decision of his participation for him. “Right, England?” Wales wants to make sure while putting one hand onto England’s arm, squeezing most amicably. If he wasn’t his brother England would have shooed him off already.
“Oh, I’m-“ England scans the people around him, all waiting for a Yes from him: France sitting in Scotland’s lap on his right, Wales sitting way too close to him on his left side, Canada leaning against the table next to Wales and smiling while observing the scene playing out in front of him.
It’s not as if he doesn’t like hanging out with his brothers and their partners, but always being the literal fifth wheel, being surrounded by happy couples talking about their couple’s things and being all lovey-dovey with each other while trying to enjoy a big breakfast… It’s not the most enjoyable sometimes, being the only single among his taken brothers.
“Hey guy! What are you talking about?”
The muscles in England’s shoulders relax the moment he hears America’s voice. As annoying that voice could be in certain moments, this was not one of them. He rolls his shoulders once. He had been more tense than he thought.
America chimes into the conversation, into the group, without any regard for Scotland’s scowl and France lightly swatting his arm, smile as bright as ever. He puts his hands on England’s shoulders, leans into him from behind and just one gentle rub of his thumbs into England’s shoulder blades makes any leftover tension disappear entirely.
“We’re just making plans for the weekend,” Canada teases, knowing exactly what his brother is going to say.
“Awesome! Can I join?” It’s barely a request. America’s tone and flashing smile don’t allow for anyone saying no, paired with eyes shining with a light of excitement no one dares to dim.
England almost lets a smile slip onto his lips and is glad America is behind him. If he had to look at that silly smile and brilliant eyes of him, he knows he wouldn’t be able to keep himself from grinning like an absolute buffoon at the prospect of America joining the double date he was supposed to fifth-wheel.
“You really want to spend your Saturday morning having English breakfast with two of my brothers and the frog?” England asks, but the question is more of a statement not demanding an answer. He cranes back his neck to look at America and there it is again: that goddamn lopsided smile that makes his stomach flutter. Who allowed America to be this bloody adorable?!
“And my brother!” America adds with a wink at Canada, voice loud and cheerful as usually before it turns a little more quiet and he looks down at England. “And you… right?”
The butterflies in England’s gut take off again, making him feel almost nauseous. He is lost in the image of a triple date in front of his inner eye for a moment – Canada and Wales, France and Scotland, and… and America and him.
“Yes,” England confirms eventually and reaches up to touch America’s left hand on his shoulder, “I’ll be there too.”
The contact between America’s hand and his only lasts for a second, but he can feel a little squeeze confirming America noticed how grounding his presence is to England.
England doesn’t enjoy being the fifth wheel to his brothers and their partners, but a triple date might not be so bad with his America there.
#aph england#aph america#usuk#ukus#hws america#hws england#hetalia#hetalia fanfiction#canwales#scotfra#riva.fanfic#not proofread#sorry i cant be bothered rn
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black book.
summary: falling in love with lorenzo berkshire was totally forbidden, but... what kind of story would your life be if you don't end up madly in love with him? although there is much more hidden under his sexual practices that end up releasing a part of you that he had never seen.
pairing(s): lorenzo berkshire x fem!reader
a/n: this ended up being so long that i didn't check it twice... sorry if there are errors, at some point i will give it another go, promise. btw, this was inspired by a tiktok i saw two days ago about this black book thing. hope you like it!
+18 smut (a little), oral sex/sit on my face (f!receiving), masturbation (f!receiving), fingering, teasing, mention and use of drugs, smoking, fuck buddies, cursing
ㅤㅤㅤ every woman knew, from the first moment they accept lorenzo berkshire between their legs, that everything that will happen would be strictly sexual and no more than one night. many had tried to change that, but he was a man of his word. at least he was with all the other girls who have been under his domain because you were too special for that. how could he even think about forgetting the best sex he had ever had in a closet in the hallways?
ㅤㅤㅤ since then, you've met more times than you can count, under the strict law of not crossing the romantic. at first, a little biased by the disgusting rumors about him, you thought it was a safe plan. and it was... for a while. when he started asking you to spend the nights with him, send you surprise notes, talk in the moonlight and all kinds of things, your heart became an incurable weakling.
ㅤㅤㅤ are you in love with lorenzo womanizer berkshire? of course you are.
ㅤㅤㅤ —what do you think of this one? —you look at your friend's dress, who walks around the room, swaying her hips—. i feel like it's not that short...
ㅤㅤㅤ you look at the end of the dress almost certain that if she sit down anywhere her ass would be exposed to the world.
ㅤㅤㅤ —of course, i forgot that the shorter the dress, the faster zabini fucks you, —you mumble with a hint of sarcasm in your voice.ㅤ
ㅤㅤㅤ your friend throws a piece of clothing from the floor, laughing nervously at the comment and insulting you between murmurs.
ㅤㅤㅤ when she turns her attention back to looking for another dress, you let yourself fall on the bed, releasing all the air that you have trapped since last night. in your mind, you had repeated the events over and over again, trying to connect some things but failing miserably in the attempt.
ㅤㅤㅤ —what's wrong with you? every time we go to a snake party, you're jumping on one leg. did something happen with berkshire yesterday?
ㅤㅤㅤ the mere mention of his name sends a chilling wave through your body. you deny it, but your friend knew something had happened. the last few times you hadn't come back from being with him until the next morning, and last night you had come back early, slamming the door in your way in.
ㅤㅤㅤ —liar. —she comes over to sit with you on the bed—. come on, tell me.
ㅤㅤㅤ lorenzo was a boy from another world in bed. he knew perfectly how to use a woman's body to please her desires, taking advantage of the situation to satisfy his own pleasure. he was fully aware of how to squeeze, bite, lick, or caress so that anyone could bend to his charm. and he had bent you in every way, body and soul.
ㅤㅤㅤ —you have to promise not to tell your crush about this —you say, lifting a pinky that your friend wraps around hers in a promise—. i found a black book in lorenzo’s room yesterday. it was a small leather notebook with a silver L on the front. i hadn’t really given it much thought, but he got so weird when he saw it in my hands. he was… tense like never before.
ㅤㅤㅤ —you couldn’t see anything inside?
ㅤㅤㅤ you shake your head and say—: i just wasn’t interested. i thought it was a notebook for class or something, but he got so mad that i doubt it.
ㅤㅤㅤ —that’s weird…
ㅤㅤㅤ your friend doesn’t want you to think about it too much and tries to make you forget about it with drinks straight from the bottle of alcohol she hides under the bed. that was the only fun you had all night because lorenzo disappeared with one of your classmates, and your friend got lost among the crowd.
ㅤㅤㅤ the next day, right after you wake up, your friend walks into the room, looking disheveled. when she notices you're awake, it seems like a memory hits the back of her mind, and her green gaze looks like it's about to explode.
ㅤㅤㅤ you laugh and ask—: what hap...?
ㅤㅤㅤ she shushes you, throwing her bag onto the bed and searching for something amongst the makeup that falls against your messy sheets.
ㅤㅤㅤ —what the...? —in her hands is that black leather book with the shiny silver L sending out sparkles from the morning light reflection—. what did you do?
ㅤㅤㅤ —when blaise and i wanted to find a place to... —she trails off, painting her cheeks red—. you don't need those details, got it. the thing is, we went to the wrong room, and before we left, i saw the book on the desk. no one knows i have it, i swear on my parents.
ㅤㅤㅤ the book has a lot of full pages, losing the neatness of the empty ones at the end. there are entire minutes when you doubt whether to open it, but the curiosity running through your body is inevitable to feel.
ㅤㅤㅤ —so? —your friend asks, forcing you to look up at her—. are you going to open it or not?
ㅤㅤㅤ the first page has black book written in capital letters and lorenzo’s initials just below it. the next page has a small table that takes you two seconds to understand.
ㅤㅤㅤ —what is that?
ㅤㅤㅤ —they look like scores —you say, showing your friend the table.
ㅤㅤㅤ —scores? scores for what?
ㅤㅤㅤ and right below it, there was a list with three points, but the most important one was the one that gets stuck in your mind.
ㅤㅤㅤ —scores for sex.
ㅤㅤㅤ your friend looks at you, noticing the terrible mistake she made by bringing the book to you. she tries to take it from your hands, but you don't let her, and you start to slowly turn the pages. there were names of classmates, girls who have talked to you once, girls you don't know, and others girls you could remember in the back of your mind. and there was your name crossed out, but still visible with a five next to it. in that book, you were either a regular muggle or the worst of them all.
ㅤㅤㅤ —this was a terrible idea —your friend says, finally taking the book from you—. a horrible idea.
ㅤㅤㅤ but you can't speak because your heart has tightened so much that it leaves you breathless and unruly tears fall down your eyes. all you can think about is how pathetic you must look, crying over a man who made it clear from the first moment that you shouldn't fall in love.
ㅤㅤㅤ it had been a week since you discovered lorenzo's big secret. you could have chosen many paths to destroy him, but you made the cowardly decision to avoid him at all costs. he had tried to communicate with you through notes, appearing in the bedroom at any time of the day or chasing you through the halls. and yet, you didn't feel like facing him.
ㅤㅤㅤ when the night came, you always had the three same questions. hadn't he searched your body more than once? did you hear wrong when he repeated between grunts that you were doing perfectly? why did he cum so fast when you wrapped your mouth around his cock? it was strange and disgusting that, after seeing all those names, your concern was centered on the small detail of a score.
ㅤㅤㅤ now you were sitting between a couple of people at a party that your friend had insisted you should be at. you felt calm, comfortable, and were having a great time. until the fun in your eyes fades when, walking through the door with a triumphant air, he appears. lorenzo berkshire would be your downfall for a long time, and you knew it very well.
ㅤㅤㅤ —hey, no. —you hear your friend's voice behind you, but your body is on autopilot, designed to escape—. enough of running away, okay? the girl i've known since i was ten never runs from jerks because she wears that skirt well and makes them suffer.
ㅤㅤㅤ you look at her, then at the crowd. if lorenzo was any other selfless boy, you would have taken revenge as you well know, but he was not that. he had removed any sanity within your loving heart, and you were not sure about playing with something as fragile as that.
ㅤㅤㅤ —no. i...
ㅤㅤㅤ —no, you do —your friend says, pulling your arm to get onto the improvised dance floor with a big smile—. you and i are going to have the best night of our lives.
ㅤㅤㅤ you drink alcohol, dance among people, smoke marijuana, and laugh with faces you can’t remember. you were having such a good time that you can only now sit down laughing out loud at a joke your friend had told.
ㅤㅤㅤ —oh, let me get more alcohol —she says, losing her balance as she gets up from her chair—. oops.
ㅤㅤㅤ you follow his figure from your seat, and there he is. lorenzo is dancing close to a girl in the middle of the crowd. just seeing him ignites a wave of rage that feeds off of all the toxins you’ve taken up until that point. and you think in the midst of lucidity that maybe you could do your thing to make him angry... just a little.
ㅤㅤㅤ you look for some boy who can get your attention so you don't feel repulsed by his touch and you find him. in a corner, smoking a joint on his own, is a boy with fine features. it was the perfect moment, perfect man and perfect opportunity.
ㅤㅤㅤ when you get up, walking among the people, you purposely bump into the body of the girl who clings to lorenzo's shoulders. you apologize with a soft smile that doesn't fade from your face when you feel the boy's eyes linger on your figure contouring as you walk.
ㅤㅤㅤ when you arrive with your prey, you greet him with a more seductive voice than you expected, but it has the effect you wanted. it doesn't take you any time to have the boy in the palm of your hand, between jokes and white lies, you manage to have his fingers on your legs with a delicacy that could melt you.
ㅤㅤㅤ —do you want to go somewhere else? —it's the voice of the boy sitting next to you, speaking close to your ear. you look at the crowd in search of lorenzo, but you can't find him—. i don't think i can hold back the urge to touch you under that dress anymore.
ㅤㅤㅤ you laugh and, the truth is, you didn't dislike the idea of rolling around with this cute stranger either. of course, if he wasn't violently attacked by lorenzo's friends, starting a fight that no one can stop. it's impressive how screams, pushes, or swear words take center stage so quickly.
ㅤㅤㅤ —walk. —even though it's just one word, you know exactly who that voice is, pulling you towards the bedroom stairs.
ㅤㅤㅤ lorenzo's quick steps blur your vision, but you try to stay awake with the soft scent of his cologne hitting your nose. when you reach your room, you can't help but sit up in bed, trying to catch your breath and clear your mind to become aware of what will happen now.
ㅤㅤㅤ when you can lift your head, lorenzo is standing right in front of you. he has his arms crossed on his chest, dark gaze, and waits for you to start some kind of conversation. a wave of heat hits every part of your body, uneasy from the gesture of his tongue pushing the inside of his cheek. oh, he was so angry.
ㅤㅤㅤ —what? —you ask, getting up from the bed, trying to avoid him noticing the stumble you've made in your own steps.
ㅤㅤㅤ —aren't you going to say anything?
ㅤㅤㅤ you turn to see him, pretending not to understand with a small gesture of confusion, managing to feed his anger as you wanted.
ㅤㅤㅤ —you ignore me all fucking week and now you let someone else fuck you in front of everyone. —he lets out a cynical laugh and claps angrily—. oh! surprise, despite everything, the lady has nothing to say.
ㅤㅤㅤ you try not to laugh at how funny his voice sounds in your head.
ㅤㅤㅤ —my problem if i want to fuck someone in front of everyone. why do you care, lorenzo? and he was just touching a little. tasting...
ㅤㅤㅤ you hear him, his four strong footsteps that shorten the distance with you. it's the scent of her perfume that you catch first, turning on some parts of your body. you can't deny that his demanding gaze also wreaks havoc on your stomach, and memories of all the times you've been together play through your head at an imperceptible speed.
ㅤㅤㅤ —we're not exclusive, remember?
ㅤㅤㅤ you expected those words to hurt him, but it seems they only manage to sink the thorn into your own heart, causing a pain that hasn't been felt so intense for a week. all because of that stupid black book.
ㅤㅤㅤ —and, after all, i'm nothing more than a muggle worth five points. —and it seems that hurts him, because he steps back, destabilized and obfuscated—. how long do you think it was going to take me to discover it? maybe you're used to taking them to your room once or never, but i've been to that fucking place, i don't know... fifty times?
ㅤㅤㅤ —how did you know?
ㅤㅤㅤ —that doesn't matter. do you know how disgusting i felt after knowing that? rating girls for their performance in bed? are you sixteen fucking years old?!
ㅤㅤㅤ lorenzo grabs your arm tightly, pushing you against the bed and preventing any movement with the weight of his body on top. your breathing hits at the movement, feeling dizzy again.
ㅤㅤㅤ —listen, it's not what you think.
ㅤㅤㅤ his voice, so clear and firm, different from the blurry image of that moment. it's hilarious that he wants to keep thinking you're stupid, as if you were exactly what his book says.
ㅤㅤㅤ —are you telling me that i lack reading comprehension? honestly, lorenzo, i'm impressed by how much you underestimate me and... —the laugh that had been stuck leaves your lips like music to the boy's ears—. you know what? fuck it.
ㅤㅤㅤ the leg that was trapped between his rises, giving a sharp blow against his crotch. your hands push his chest, turning in the bed to straddle him.
ㅤㅤㅤ —a five, enzo? —he looks at you, breathing heavily from the wave of torment affecting his body—. weren't you the one who was going after my body? did i hear wrong when you told me that i was doing it just the way you want? why did you seem to enjoy it when i'm a fucking five?
ㅤㅤㅤ yes, it was unpleasant to put scores, but in your chest was a much bigger pain. you like lorenzo. you are madly in love with him and that clouds every other sense in your head. you wanted to be a twenty, fifty or top score for him. you wanted to be enough. you wanted to be the only woman in his power. you wanted to change the immovable.
ㅤㅤㅤ —beautiful... —his hand tries to touch your cheek decorated with small tears.
ㅤㅤㅤ your body reacts by instinct, hitting his arm to press it against the bed, avoiding any touch that could make you lose the courage you have accumulated.
ㅤㅤㅤ —why, lorenzo?
ㅤㅤㅤ if there was something he hated was seeing sad tears running down your face, being enough to say—: i'm not the only one with a book like that. we compare scores, bet on it, and all kinds of things. i just... i didn't want them to know.
ㅤㅤㅤ you look at him, noticing the honesty in his eyes.
ㅤㅤㅤ —you didn't want them to know what?
ㅤㅤㅤ he smirks, looking at your body with lust. every curve, every place that only he knew, every trace of his marks that have disappeared, and every area that he could touch to make you roll in pleasure. lorenzo knew every little detail of your body with such precision that it was inevitable for him not to imagine you naked.
ㅤㅤㅤ —how amazing you are in bed.
ㅤㅤㅤ and you could blame many things for the events that happen after that. you'd say it was his deep voice that scratched your insides, messy hair that falls on the duvet or disheveled clothes. some might believe when you blame the alcohol, but there was someone in the whole world who would always know the truth. you.
ㅤㅤㅤ lorenzo buries his hands in your hips, pushing you against his body to grab your lips with a delicious habit. the taste of alcohol in his mouth is the same as yours, intense and hot. your hips move with the help of his hands that squeeze just the way you like. you let him dominate the situation of that kiss until a fleeting memory comes back to your head.
ㅤㅤㅤ —i want you to use your mouth —you murmur against his lips—. i want you to use it so you can't use it on anyone else.
ㅤㅤㅤ lorenzo looks at you, trying to turn on the bed to do what you ask. the problem is that your body tenses at the intention, and he looks at you with confusion.
ㅤㅤㅤ —not like that.
ㅤㅤㅤ you pull your panties off to stop your pussy right in front of his face. the simple breath of lorenzo hitting your folds makes you shudder, but you know he has to suffer like never before. so, when he makes the gesture of getting closer to your wetness, your fingers tangle in his hair, pressing his head against the bed.
ㅤㅤㅤ —i want to hear that you want it. i want you to beg.
ㅤㅤㅤ it was always lorenzo who dominated in the relationship. you enjoyed it that way, but today, there was a rage inside you that was as uncontrollable as the wave of ecstasy that runs through your body when you talk to him that way. you wanted to make him feel so small that he would be the one to beg to come back this time.
ㅤㅤㅤ you look at him, part of his face covered by the black skirt and gaze lit up in flames. the hot, heavy air crashing against you was perfect, sending desperate signals to your eager and needy body.
ㅤㅤㅤ —let me devour you. i want to lick and suck until i can't take it anymore. please, just, please...
ㅤㅤㅤ and your pussy presses against his lips, holding part of your weight with the headboard of the bed and legs. lorenzo doesn't take long to do what he had asked, stimulating your clitoris with the tip of his expert tongue. you moan at the tickling sensations that travel from there, moving your hips gently against him.
ㅤㅤㅤ lorenzo kisses, sucks, and licks as best he can against the weight of your body on top of him, raising his eyes over your skirt to watch you arch your back every time his tongue gets close to your entrance. his hands move up to your breasts, where one stops to squeeze over your shirt and the other continues its way to your mouth.
ㅤㅤㅤ —do you wanna s-see how i do it? —you say, looking down at him and sticking your tongue out to lick his fingers—. i always imagine it’s your cock.
ㅤㅤㅤ his fingers sink into your mouth so deeply that it’s impossible not to gasp. your tongue licks, curling and tasting the length of his long digits. when lorenzo is satisfied with that, he moves his hand from your back to your entrance.
ㅤㅤㅤ —w-wait, j-just wait a little —you say between soft moans—. i need you to go down a little.
ㅤㅤㅤ lorenzo does so, making you shiver from the new sensation that builds up in that perfect area. then, you feel his fingers digging in in the perfect direction to touch a spot that activates thousands of waves of pleasure.
ㅤㅤㅤ his fingers going in and out quickly, while his mouth continues to stimulate you, was enough to make your legs feel weak. the accumulation of emotions that are trying to be released with moans explodes in an electric current that travels from head to toe, cutting off the air that enters your lungs, making you scream and fall against lorenzo's face pressed against your thighs.
ㅤㅤㅤ he grabs your ass and manages to turn with his head still buried between them. you can feel the tip of his tongue wander over your sensitive areas again. suffer, suffer and suffer.
ㅤㅤㅤ —stop. —one of your feet pushes his shoulder, making him look at you confused—. will you burn that book?
ㅤㅤㅤ your hands play with your shirt, lowering the neckline to free your breasts in front of him. lorenzo's gaze darkens, and he follows your hand to the inside of your thighs.
ㅤㅤㅤ —beautiful...
ㅤㅤㅤ lorenzo licks his lips, feeling his cock tremble in the desire to bury itself so hard and deep inside you.
ㅤㅤㅤ —would you do it to feel how my tight pussy takes you? would you do it so you could enter me whenever and however you want?
ㅤㅤㅤ a wave of pleasure runs through your body at the sensation of your own fingers touching the places that make you moan in front of him. lorenzo was slowly losing his sanity, and you could see it in his eyes.
ㅤㅤㅤ —yes, i will. i'll do whatever you want with that book —he says, his voice dragging out the words because of the rush with which he says them—. i will.
ㅤㅤㅤ and from one moment to the next, even if you're not sure how, you're out of bed with lorenzo staring at you as hard as the bulge in his pants about to explode. you don't let that weaken you, adjusting your clothes in seconds.
ㅤㅤㅤ —good. perfect, really. —he follows your body to the door with the bad mood sprouting from every pore of his skin—. then we can finish this when you do it right in front of my eyes.
ㅤㅤㅤ —what?
ㅤㅤㅤ —what you heard —you say, sliding a soft smile on your lips—. when i see that ridiculous book in pieces, you can finish what we started. now, get out of my fucking room and close the door on your way out.
ㅤㅤㅤ your body disappears behind the bathroom door, where you hear him call your name angrily, and he leaves the room shortly after. if he hadn't given up, you were sure you would have, so you're thankful he did it first.
ㅤㅤㅤ the surprise is that lorenzo came back minutes later with the book in one hand and his wand in the other, turning the book on fire right in front of your eyes to turn you into a rag of moans, licks, thrusts and marks. not many things could change about this relationship now, but you know that lorenzo might be a little more in love with you than it seems.
#lorenzo berkshire#lorenzo berkshire x reader#lorenzo berkshire x you#lorenzo berkshire x female reader#lorenzo berkshire smut#slytherin boys#slytherin#wizarding world#harry potter
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