#wanted to just go ahead and answer now so i didnt forget

[minorcharactertournament]

I'm curious, how do you narrow down characters when almost everyone got the same vote, outside of submissions of non minor characters?

By getting very specific with the definition of 'minor character.' Limiting it to only 1 character per series did help quite a lot, though.

While in my initial post I kept my definition of 'minor' fairly vague/not very strict, I ended up using a more strict rule-set for the final selection, built around one of the first characters locked in, "Cabbage Merchant." (as the nominator put it, "come on")

Has to be a character in the original text (not in the fleshed out personality and backstory way, but can't just be a creature or background extra that does nothing)

Has to have none or very little effect on the plot (this came up more when deciding between characters in the same series, this ranks characters with more screen-time but less relevancy over characters with less screen-time but more relevancy)

These two were mainly to weed out characters that were either more of 'Supporting Characters' or more like 'Background Characters.'

3. "Essence of Minor Character" (not sure how to word this, but just how much the character embodied the idea of a minor character? Reoccurring gags, one scene wonders, characters not meant to do much but people couldn't help but latch onto, that sorta thing)

Now, you can say some of the characters in the final bracket don't perfectly align with this, and I'd agree. This is where things get pragmatic(?)

I wanted to have a good variety of characters from different sources and of differing popularity so it would be more reasonable to seed. Therefore, I kept in characters that I felt I could properly gauge the odds of winning of compared to other characters, and left out characters that might overlap fandoms.

There is one final factor, which is my knowledge of the submitted character in question. I tried to at least look through the wiki, tumblr tag, and sites where the series/character is discussed to get an idea of how popular the series was and if the character in question was actually minor. However, this isn't exactly fool-proof, as there were some characters I had to do some asking around to figure out what I would define them as. I may have unfairly set aside some nominees that were more deserving due to having difficulty finding someone I could ask about them.

I wasn't exactly using hard math or logic in the end, more just "Would it feel wrong for them to be in this poll?"

[reijnders]

PLEEEEEAASE give me your pixie hollow headcanons or lore or theories or whatever i am so deep into it right now and i don't know anyone else who likes it :,)

- @pairies-n-fixies

a new hand touches the beacon…

imma put everything below the cut cus this is gonna get /long/, but heres a TL;DR as well :)

blurry boundaries btwn seasons + air currents + common Clank and Bobble forgetfulness L

the Keeper's ice film about Peri and Tink's Arrival isn't beat for beat, its just a summary

oh god idk if i can tl:dr this one but basically both lord milori and minister of winter can exist i promise

starting off with Tinkerbell, Clank, and Bobble flying through the winter woods b4 settling on Tinker's Nook my /personal/ thought is that 1) the boundaries between seasons are only hard and fast across water, like between winter and autumn in Secret of the Wings, 2) the air right above those borders can have a lot more variation due to changing air currents n stuff, so while is was definitely chilly, it was also bordering spring(evidenced purely by the color of the snowless trees in this horrible screenshot), so with a combo of those they could potentially be okay for a few brief seconds of a fly-by, and 3) Clank and Bobble are not always the thinkers when it comes to Anything Except Tinkering. i could fully accept that they were /not/ supposed to do that and forgot until a bit after.

Periwinkle's existence! dull boring-ass answer: camera didnt care about Periwinkle/wishful thinking that they had some level of meta planning ahead and wanted to keep the idea of more than one a secret. less dull answer: the cinematic reenactment that Peri and Tink saw in the Keeper's work zone wasn't as accurate to real life within the world timing-wise. the Keeper's own personal magic(and by that extension, the natural way in which he and any past and future Keepers are able to manipulate dust) is for the retelling of history. So Peri and Tink were from the same laugh, yeah, but not as back-to-back as it was made to seem in the movie. essentially its like the Keeper has OpenShot Video Editor edition pixie dust powers.

my big finale,,,, the one i actually focus a lot on in my fairy worldbuilding Lord Milori vs the Minister of Winter in the first movie I personally choose to believe that they both exist, but lemme break it down for you beat for beat

PART ONE: THE FUNCTION OF A MINISTER

so we know, based on ofc the first movie, that the ministers are for each season, they oversee the organization and prep for bringing that season to the mainland, and also just keeping it tidy within the Hollow.

so naturally, there should be four ministers, one for each season. now here is where i first start deviating a little from canon. so understandable, the pixie hollow seasons are based on the far northern/southern hemisphere experience of them, because going elsewhere would mean a lot less difference between each season all the way until you hit the equator's dry/wet season split. therefore, spring, summer, and autumn aren't the same level of warm. summer is the warmest season, and Warm fairies who do most of their tasks for that season will be biologically more optimized for that region, same for all the others.

The ministers of Spring and Autumn, for instance, would have a somewhat better resistance to the cold than the minister of Summer, though they are still naturally Warm fairies and eventually would reach a point where their wings would grow to cold and snap. The minister of Winter could technically be neither a Warm or Winter fairy by this metric. Because the ministers do a lot of their work with the Queen, and only oversee the production and take down of their seasons, it's understandable that the winter minister would be a Warm fairy biologically, but since Talent is an innate thing, each and every minister of Winter that Arrives could be of this unique class of fairies that can spend a much longer time in the Winter section of the Hollow, and on the flip side, maybe not do so well in the Summer section of the Hollow.

PART TWO: THE FUNCTION OF LORD MILORI

So we have ministers and we have a Queen. i've established that the minister of Winter could feasibly venture into Winter whenever she needs to to check on how things are going, but what about the long term? This is where Milori comes in, not as a minister, but as a stand-in for Queen Clarion. Since she herself cannot go into Winter for very long, he's essentially her, but for Winter. he may occasionally receive correspondence from her with big news and changes to protocol, but for the most part he operates on his own, since i imagine mail between the seasonal boundary would require rigorous scheduling and couldn't be done just on the fly unless you've acquired a bird, or...

...if you have a minister of Winter.

PART THREE: WORKING TOGETHER

Having both a minister and a lord of winter would make sense, mainly because the role of minister is necessary regardless of seasonal conflicts! in the first movie, when Spring is being brought to the world, it is the minister that accompanies the nature talent fairies, not Clarion. Similarly, it shows the minister of Winter returning with her fairies after the onset of her season.

If Milori were to overwrite the minister entirely, and take over all her duties, it would conflict more with his own lore, because he would have to be able to join in meetings conducted in the Tree on the regular with no issue, which we know he can't do. And on top of that, he would have to travel to the mainland on the regular, which would leave the Winter Woods without a leader for a good chunk of each year, which would not be a good combination in an emergency situation.

PART FOUR: LITERALLY JUST SHARING SOME FUN STUFF I CAME UP WITH

I like to think that things like queens, ministers, and lords comes in rough cycles. Now some of this delves into things that i truly dont have time to get into(regarding mother dove, the age of the Hollow, fairies interactions with humans, the power of flight, how fairies interact with dust) but im gonna try with what i have.

So imagine, for a moment, that Clarion is not the first queen, and on top of that, the Hollow is not the first location on Neverland that fairies have lived. I headcanon Clarion as a "young" queen, but she is still a little over a thousand years old, with a lot more to go.

Ministers and Lords also follow a cycle, with the one of Lord/Ladies of winter being shorter than that of a Queen, but still pretty long(minimum half of a Queen's expected lifespan), and ministers being less than that(minimum a third of a Queen's lifespan). The average fairy lives a while, but not forever, so it is rare for the average joe to see the changing of Queens, lords, and ministers. There can be exceptions, of course, when someone passes away due to outside causes, or if someone is exiled, but those situations are rare, especially now that fairies live in The Hollow.

With the exception of Spring, i headcanon the current ministers as having Arrived in the last few years of the previous Queen's life, and Milori showing up <10 years after Clarion Arrived as queen. Any fairy alive today(with today being late 18whatever the hell in the movies to the 1940s) would not remember this stuff, but its fun to think about!

[leegemma]

Hello! I really love ur fics, so may I request 15, 17 and 18 with lee!chan and ler!han

p.s we need more of lee!chan in this world

Dunno if it's because I just said I wanted to start writing again- but I suddenly felt motivated again 😭 Thank you for your request anon! I completely agree with the last part. Hope you like it!

Enjoy:)

15 - “what did you just say to me?”

17 - “apologize!”

18 - “i’m gonna count down from 10.”

---------------------------------------

Mornings at the skz dorms were always pretty slow, especially on their days off. Everybody usually focused on doing their own thing or just hanging out together watching TV.

This specific morning was a bit different since most of the boys decided to go out and explore around a little. All exept for Chan and Han who both decided to stay and sleep until late (well, at least Han did).

Chan was in the process of preparing a bowl of cereal for his breakfast, but paused when he saw a sleepy Han entering the kitchen. He immediately folded, laughing and pointing at the boy.

"W-whaht happend to youhu!?!" Chan struggled to catch his breath as he laughed.

Han stared at him blankly, squinting his eyes in confusion. "What are you talking about?"

Chan only seemed more amused. "You haven't looked in the mirror yet, have you?"

"No..." Han answered suspiciously.

"Well I suggest you do." Chan said before bursting out laughing again. "You- you look like-"

Han waited for Chan to stop laughing and complete his sentence, and when it didn't happen, he questioned: "I look like what?"

"You lohok like- youhu look like Jimmy Neutron!" Chan kept laughing as Han's face turned bright pink.

“apologize!” Jisung demanded, pouting slightly.

"Or what? You're gonna tie me up and force me to listen to science facts, Jimmy?" Chan teased, still laughing.

Han slowly lifted his head to look creepily at Chan, and in a low voice asked: “what did you just say to me?”

Chan raised his eyebrow, putting his now almost empty cereal bowl on the kitchen counter, then looking back at Jisung. "You want me to repeat it?"

Han didnt think twice before he tackled Chan to the cold kitchen floor.

"Hey!" Chan groaned as Jisung sat on his waist and stuck chan's hands under his back, keeping them pinned.

"You better apologize right now." Han warned. “i’m gonna count down from 10.”

Chan giggled. "As if you scare me, Jimmy."

Han playfully growled and without any warning (or any counting for that matter...) started clawing at Chan's sensitive upper stomach.

"AHHHH!!!" Chan started squirming. "J-JIMMY STHAHAHP!"

Jisung shook his head. "Not until you apologise, and stop calling me Jimmy!"

"HAHAHAHA!" Chan's laugh became louder when Han managed to push his wiggling fingers under his arm.

Han couldn't help but smile as he watched Chan give up under him., he snuck his fingers to the crook of Chan's neck and left them softly moving around there for a while. "You just go ahead and tell me when you're ready to say it~"

"HAAHAHAHAH- NOHOHOHOHO!" Chan shook his head frantically and attempted to bite Han's fingers. The soft tickling in the same place was driving him crazy.

When the younger noticed his tactic wasn't working, he decided it was time for the grand final, so he gave Chan a second to breathe, then smirked evily at him, and went to town while digging into his ribs crazily.

"NAHAHAH- NOHOT THERE! YOUHUHU WON! YOUHUHU WOHOHONNNM- I'M SOHOHORRY!" Chan said between laughs and squeals.

"You're sorry to who? What's my name?" Han asked with a smile on his face as he slowed his fingers down.

"H-hahan! Youhur nahame is Han..." The leader took in a deep breath when Jisung stopped the torture and just layed there for a while.

Han smiled and patted his head for a second, then stood up with a proud smile. "That's right, I'm Han. And don't you ever forget that!"

"I can assure you I won't..." Chan said from his place on the floor.

Han giggled and left the kitchen. Leaving Chan by himself again. Just when Chan finished washing the bowl he ate from before, he heard an ear piercing scream coming from the direction of the bathroom.

"HOLLY SHIT- I DO LOOK LIKE JIMMY NEUTRON!"

------------------------------------------------------

[nxdxxh3]

Hello.

I have not posted or reblog or whatever these things are called nowadays. Anyways, I bet no one reads this cus i just wanna give a life update to myself lmao.

I stopped visiting tumblr probably more than 5 years ago?? So around 2018 probably. Oh wow. Okay imma make a timeline then.

2018: I was with my ex boyfriend. Lets just call him A. Things started great then went downhill and i ignored all the red flags yadda yadda yadda typical young girl thats so positive im gonna end up with this guy. Well no. If i could turn back time, i would slap myself in the face and tell her to run. I actually cant remember much back then as im trying to forget everything 2020 and below. But what i did remember is how manipulative he is and a liar. But, i was in "love". I started my diploma this year and graduated already in 2019. We'll get to that year in a second. Anyways, he practically talked me into being with him rather than this really great dude i was dating before him and mind you he had a gf. In my defense, i didnt know as i said earlier, hes manipulative and a liar. The dude before him is from singapore and i was young and thought LDR wont work on me(boy i was wrong.) I needed the physical attention cus well, i was young.. But im glad i did met him physically cus we planned to meet in Johor and it was sweet. okay that got sidetracked but 2018 is like the 2nd year i was with A. During this year, it really went downhill. I started to fall into deep depression and my mental health was bad bad. Thats when i felt i wanted to unalive myself and hurt myself. and i did. the latter i mean. anyways he started working somewhere and i actually was sus about this bitch working there as well. Lets call her S for slut.

2019: Fast forward to 2019. This is the year i got a cyst on my left ovary. Due to reasons i rather not say but i will answer if by any chance someone read this and are curious so go ahead inbox me i guess. But definitely A was contributing to it. Whether directly or indirectly. So yeah, during that time it was bad. I lost my left ovary and i only have 1 now. How i found out you ask? (no one asked but) I had really unbearable pain on my abdominal area. The uterus area like non stop. I thought its the period cramps but i wasnt on my period that time at all. I found out a bit late so the cyst grew until 12cm and i saw it after the removal. Its the size of a baby's head! im not even exaggerating. Its really big. Anyways after the surgery, my family has been there for me. They're really the main reason why im still alive and well mentally and physically. That was in July. and i cant remember anything before that. so lets move on. Towards the end of the year, i found out that A was cheating on me. Not 1, but with 2 different girls. 1 is S and 1 is F. These random ass letters will get me confused but nvm. F is the ex gf. and the funny thing is, F was friends, best friends with S. LMAO. When i found out, the first thing i did was exposing him on my instagram sksk. I cant do anything and im not gonna stay quiet about it. so i just did that. and a lot of people came forward exposing more about him and S. So hes really active with S. Hes been going out, fucking her and F behind my back. and they both dont know about each other's situation btw until F saw my insta story and contacted me to meet up. and we did and i told her everything. all this time A was badmouthing me to his side pieces saying how much of a psycho i am, how i always beg him to stay (fuck no ew i always ask for break ups but he always have a way for words and actions). Like i said, hes manipulative and a liar. the fact he had the audacity to ask me to not stay mad for long as if im still gonna be part of this shitty hole. fuck no. i did confront S at that time and bro i really felt like i wanted to slap her face and drag her across the road but hey hes not that fucking worth it for me to do that. I complete left the whole fiasco and stayed friends with F lmao. shes cool. but sometimes dumb bcs she still stayed with him after everything. although that time A already went public with S he can still manipulated F somehow. A ended up marrying S tho. and side note, i gave A a fossil watch and it was fucking expensive. and he told F he bought it himself lmao. fucker. oh and he often take advantage on me asking me to pay for shit. he did pay sometimes but restaurants that are expensive, i paid. he paid for mamak, hawker stalls and what not lmao. So that ended. And i ended up celebrating new years alone and i fucking glad i did.

2020 -2021 July: So uuh covid came. And i met this dude on May 2020. How? me and my discord friends that i met during covid were planning to meet up and hes one of them who tags along. He just broke up with his ex gf 2-3 days ago that time. How he approached me, he kissed me creepily and suddenly while me and him was alone in a house i rented before covid during my degree. Now that i think back, it was creepy. He said "what if i attacked you right now". LIKE WTF? WHO SAYS THAT. Then he suddenly kissed me. i did not know how to de-escalated the situation. so i just let it slide. we just met for 2 hours btw. and he keeps on asking for a kiss afterwards too. on the way back from the outing, i have to send him back and he did not have a license btw. All the way back, he keeps on asking wanting to kiss me again (of course i said no) and hold my hand (this one i was ok with it although i was so uncomfortable). It was so creepy dude. I dont know if those things counts as assault or not cus i kinda just went along with it but i was uncomfy. Anyways, hes unhygienic, kinda narcissistic also have anger issues. Everytime we played games together, i cant enjoy shit bcs he keeps on tilting and screaming at randoms. (sometimes he tilts on me) I also have to pick him up and send him back after all of our dates. it was a mess. I learned the hard way after agreeing to date him. but during my relationship with him, im the fucked up one. i owned up to my mistakes and im not gonna leave this part out from this timeline. i cheated on him with some random dude. and i wont justify my actions. cheating is still cheating. he did gave me a second chance and i swear to god i did try my best to be better. i don't blame him for acting more suspicious of me and blaming me for everything. but it gets worse and i got tired. i honestly thought i should've just left instead of asking for a second chance. i realized the reason why i asked for a second chance is just to make up for it. bcs i felt bad. and that's not something i should've done. i should've just left and let him healed. trust me that came up a lot of times but seems like he doesn't want us to end either. so the unhappy and most depressing phase of our relationship got dragged until august 2021.

2021 August: I finally had the courage to end things with him for good. Bcs we both tried to move on from the incident but hes not doing well on his end. He still accused me of things that i didn't do. Question everything i did and yes i got tired. again i don't blame him but Its getting unhealthy and toxic for both of us. He keeps on saying he trusts me and i have become better but still act like we're back to square one. I called quits and he doesn't want to in the beginning. But then i had to lie telling him i have another person in my life. and that was his last straw. He screamed and yelled at me and just ended there like that. I felt bad but i cant stay again bcs i felt bad. Its not right.

2021 September - Present: These timelines are getting me confused ngl cus i really cant remember the exact time. anyways before i broke up with my previous bf, i was in another different circle of friends. I spent most of my time there while trying to escape him. i thought maybe if i distant myself its a lot more easier for me to leave and him to forget me. but yea during that time we actually fought a lot bcs of that. so after the break up i spent all of my time there. and i met this random singaporean dude. we spent all night talking and exchanging songs that we like and watching sitcoms. i remember our first show was The Good Place. Our discord server name is The Good Place where we hang a lot. (ldr things) and yes he knows about my past from A to Z. Basically everything i have wrote so far. We played valorant a lot tgt. I know i know, very short amount of time meeting someone new. but bro he hits different. its definitely the rush, the chasing, the butterflies. i haven't felt like that for a while and well, its bcs of my own fault too. i admit everything happens so fast like very fast. so we start really getting to know each other after dating which is weird and can lead to an easy break up especially we're doing long distance. but im not losing this dude. so i said, fuck it. he did say that he scared long distance would be hard but hes willing to try. i did it before and i want to be better. especially for a guy like him. 2 years has passed and today, 13th April 2023, we're still together and getting engage hopefully end of this year. Life has been great since i met him. Everything is different. he accepts me for who i am, we finish each other's dark humors/jokes. We facetime everyday and never get tired of seeing each other. He met my family and i met his. Although we ldr, we make it work. There's ups and down of course and mostly bcs of me lmao cus i self sabotage a lot liddat. but im working on it. and also, i suck at communicating. mostly bcs i usually keep things to myself during my past relationships. but that's what im working on right now and i hope im doing well. besides that, i am finally content and happy. Not a day goes by i never thought of him. I truly love him and i cant wait for what the future holds for us.

Thanks for reading guys. (im probably talking alone rn)

[andwhentheangelscome]

*entering session, already in progress*

m: and so, I guess I trusted her, not just to take good care of herself emotionally, (which she didn't do), but also to love me. dm: you described this issue earlier as 'having been betrayed by someone who loved you' - do you think that she didnt actually love you?

m: ...

m: ... I think that it depends on what definition of love you’re using. If you use the one preferred by bell hooks, which I also often use, which is, “the will to extend one's self for the the purpose of nurturing one's own or another's spiritual growth,” then I think the answer is that...

m: she didn’t always love me. there were many times when we were still together, where her pain, and her anger, and her self-hatred were much more important to her than whatever love she felt for me.

m: and so. I don’t think that she never loved me. I even think that she might still love me now, using that definition. But that's still - there were still many, many times where she made it clear to me that her love for me was less important than her rage at... everything, it felt like.

dm: do you think that that rage has become a part of you now?

m: what do you mean?

dm: i mean that, people in your situation often develop within themselves - they internalize - the negative emotions of their partners, in an effort to defend themselves from the repercussions and their effects. in order to 'prepare' yourself, you begin to see yourself, and indeed, your entire world, through the lens of their abuse, and in doing so, you think yourself to be "getting ahead of the curve" -

m: !!! DONT BE AFRAID OF THEM?? ARE YOU INSANE?? !!

m: - when what you're really doing is making their worst habits into your reflexive ones.

dm: exactly.

m: fuck me.

dm: it's okay. it's okay. this process of talking it through, of making it visible, is how you start to meaningfully undo the patterns that the initial trauma caused you to develop.

m: ....

m: I want to hurt myself.

dm: don't do that, dylan. don't. it's okay to hold space for those feelings. it's important even, to be able to hold space for those feelings, because what's really happening there is that you, like so many of my patients who struggle to allow themselves to simply feel their feelings, are simply looking for a way to materialize the pain that was inflicted upon you in a way that will be unavoidable. and beyond the fact that harming yourself will never help you to progress in your healing, it ultimately distracts you from the fact of the matter, which is that your pain is already unavoidable. you yourself have proven that by being driven here, into my office, by these feelings themselves. i don't want you to give into them. but i also don't you to be afraid of them.

dm: no, im not insane. it's gonna be okay. take a deep breath.

dm: im not saying that you should give them any power over you. im not saying that you should indulge in them, or their answers for how to live your life. what im saying is that these feelings that you have - these impulses to punish yourself, to punish anything, to break anything, just something, just so long as it's disruptive - are not, as you might first assume, arising from a place of disloyalty.

dm: the feelings that you're having are your body's way of telling you that something is wrong. and something is wrong, dylan. listen to me: your entire parasympathetic nervous system - the system responsible for telling you when you're in danger, and when it's okay for you to sleep - has been on an all hands, red-buzzer-flashing, all-systems-go, high-fucking-alert, nearly constantly, for what has been nearly six years now. and what's more, the very first thing that your protective, inner, most originally traumatized part of your self did - in order to protect you, in order to protect her, and in order to protect that unstable-yet-stable life that you had built together in that tiny, one bedroom apartment - was try to make you somehow fucking forget that any of this was ever even happening.

dm: and now, it's six years down the road, and youre digging up the alarm bells, and you're finding that they hurt to stare at, and you're finding that they hurt to try to rest in the light of, and you're finding that - what's more - the alarm bells going off isn't even your only problem anymore. you have a new problem, one which is perhaps even more concerning than the original problem that brought you here, which is that your conscious sense of self has been nearly fully disconnected from your inner, psychological, and physiological sense of self, for years now.

m: ....

dm: and so you have a body that's telling you that there's a lion in the room that wants to eat you, and a heart that feels much too weak in its current state to pick up that message and do battle with it, and a mind which was itself - until very recently - all too willing to play along with the fiction that this was all somehow even remotely a tenable long-term situation for you to try to be successful at living a life within.

dm: and so you actually need to stay in touch with those parts of yourself that feel like the best solution that you have is for you to toss yourself out of the nearest window. I'm not saying you should let them dictate what the meaning that they have in your life is going to be.

dm: but you can't put any more distance between yourself and them than you can between your own two feet.

dm: and what's more important, Dylan, is that the truth that I know,

dm: and the truth that you know, in your heart, because it's the truth that you came in here so that I could help you find again, is that you don't want to go out that window.

dm: you don't want to die. you don't think you deserve it. and that's why you're so god damn angry.

dm: because there was someone in your life, who was important to you, who treated you like maybe you didn't deserve to live a life that was filled with joy and peace.

dm: and when the time came in the argument for you to tell them to fuck. right. off., because they were worth more than that, and you were worth more than that, and quite frankly, none of this was actually a situation that called for a sudden and abrupt change in altitude,

m: i instead chose to try to absorb all of that rage, and all of that pain, and all that confusion and hope and despair into some secretive chamber of my heart, so that i could try to somehow convince myself, that maybe i would never have to knock on its door again -

m: and yet here it is. in all its glory and all its madness, in all its clarity and all its impotent rage, in all its love, and in all its hopeless hope.

dm: yes.

m: ....

m: it hurts.

dm: I know it does. I'm sorry that this happened to you. i hope you know that no one deserves to feel the way about themselves that you have felt for the most of the last five years.

m: ...

dm: These feelings are yours though. No one else can claim them. And there's no good way for you to rid yourself of them -

dm: exactly.

m: - except to love them, right? until they've finally been brought to see that -

m: that they no longer need - so badly - to fling themselves against the sharp corners of this world.

dm: ...

m: ...

dm: do you think that you can do that? do you think that you can learn how to honor your past, and to build your life again, and to somehow - despite and in spite of what happened - to ease your own pain?

dm: ...

m: ....

m: I don't know.

m: ...

m: I don't know.

m: ...

dm: ....

m: ....

m: I -

m: ...

m: I do know -

m: though...

m: that I am

m: never,

m: ever,

m: EVER,

m: going to be able to convince myself

m: not to at least try.

dm: ...

m: because...

m: because I do deserve to live a life that im

m: happy to be living...

m: a life that i can be proud of.

dm: :')

dm: that's my boy. <3

[sukunasweetheart]

aye modern bf? husband? au sukuna again haha oop (gender neutral reader) just fluff and cuteness

i realise sukunas always rich or at least richer than average in most of these so i thought abt what if there was a point in the relationship where yall didnt have a car 

so its raining (im kinda redundant with the romantic tropes under the rain but uh sorry not sorry) and hes doing overtime at his job and you decide it’d be nice if you went to him yourself with an umbrella to pick him up

ofc you want it to be a surprise so you dont call him in advance

its windy and raining pretty hard so by the time you get there, parts of your clothes are already a bit wet, the damp sensation making them stick to your skin a little, making you feel uncomfortable

but right as you were near the entrance to his workplace, you see that a coworker offers him a ride home - to which he accepts bc he doesnt notice you around the corner

out of embarrassment, you hide yourself a bit and watch as he gets onto the vehicle </3 your eyes cant help but dart back and forth between the fancy car they have and the pitiful umbrella thats in your hand.

Habitually, Sukuna tended to look out of windows. Today was the same, even inside of a car that belonged to a coworker he barely knew. But his gaze that was fixed on the trails of droplets against the glass, soon landed elsewhere, on someone outside, farther into the distance.

As the vehicle passed by, you turned your face away from it to try and avoid being seen. Once you heard it go up a few metres ahead, you looked at it again and watched as it got farther and farther away. I guess I’ll just tell him I was out to meet a friend briefly, you told yourself. You were glad he was getting to go home dry after a long day.

“...I have someone waiting.”

“Hey. Stop the car.”

“Hm? What’s wrong? Did you forget something?”

You only managed to take one step when the car suddenly stopped, the blaring red light taking over the ground before it. Sukuna promptly stepped out of the vehicle and said something of a farewell to his coworker, before jogging back towards you.

“Why didn’t you call?” he said indignantly, yanking you towards him with his hand wrapped around yours against the umbrella handle.

“I...wanted to surprise you,” you mustered up, feeling stunned.

Sukuna felt himself soften at your words again, like the countless times he’d experienced with you before. He covered it up with a helpless sigh.

“How did you even notice me?” you asked him with a flustered look.

“How could I not? Looking like a dull puppy out in the rain.”

You didn’t know how to respond to the remark, so you just let out an awkward chuckle.

How fortunate. You were thankful. Thankful that you’d decided to come out today, thankful for his habit of looking out windows, thankful for the rain. Now you had your arm linked with his, and albeit the soaked shoulders, the goosebumps from the mild cold, you felt soft on the inside, like you could melt at any given moment.

“Next time, just let me know in advance,” he grunted, looking away.

“Okay.”

The small blushes of pink that dusted his cheeks were more than a good enough answer to those questions.

“So you picked me over a nice, comfortable ride home? You’d rather walk in the rain with me?” you teased, skipping beside him.

“Shut up.”

Masterlist

[delicrieux]

☆ﾐ 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢 “𝚘𝚑”

PART 10: BIG DICK IS BACK IN TOWN

y/n is back in brooklyn for the holidays. thinking that a stream will make her feel less homesick for cali, she starts working on her famously titled hentai.free.srv. what was supposed to be a relaxing stream turns into a special delivery about two hours in.

─── corpse husband x reader ─── soc. media + written fiction! ─── word count: 2.2k ─── ❥ req: Here's one... You know those apps for delivery like Domino's or whatnot... What if reader is streaming Among Us with Corpse, and reader mentions they're hungry and Corpse offers to order them food, and readers like no no it's fine... Then there's delivery at the door (Corpse ordered beforehand) 

author’s note: fucky format is also back in town baby!!! also if you find any mistakes - no u didnt <3 thank u everyone for enjoying this story sm i literally cant believe how feral yall going strawberry cow was a nuclear explosion im still recovering tbh. got an ask a while ago and decided to incorporate it into myso. happy holidays everyone! myso will continue on monday!

ultimate masterlist.  ҉  myso masterlist   ҉   previous.  ҉   next.

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Indeed, being soft on any social media platform was the biggest disgrace and needed to be eliminated post haste. Moreover, it was a slippery slope - once you start flooding your timeline with cute imagery and heart emojis, what will stop you from posting inspirational Facebook quotes? Disgusting. If Rae were here, she would chide you (not you thinking about her as if she’s dead or something). For once in your life, you feel like you deserve it. 

Alas, you hope this little chaos you’ve caused is enough to throw everyone off. The stans, especially. You know the hashtags, you’ve seen ARMY scourging for info online with the same fervor and ruthlessness 1 Direction fans hacked airport security cameras just to spy on the boys. If you had any dirty secrets online, they are out to the public now - thankfully, besides the Harry Styles stan account (with edits and all), you have nothing. Though, now that you think about it, exposed nudes would have been better than your Punk!Harry edit receiving almost a million views. God, your life’s a fucking mess.

Your fans aren’t the only ones out for info - you, too, are trying to decipher Rae’s message. Code: Barbecue Sauce. The two of you had come up with it roughly two years ago, around the same time when you promised that if you didn’t find significant others by the time you’re 40, you’ll just marry each other. It was one of the many rules found in your friendship codex. Barbecue Sauce signifies information - an exchange of information. And depending on how it ends or begins (”So I’m sitting there” alludes to Rae, “On my titties” alludes to you), secret data on that person is given away, usually free of charge. 

But why? And to whom did Rae give away what? You had pestered her mercilessly and even sent some voice messages where you were crying. You were only crying because of a video of a grandpa smiling you saw on TikTok, but you are a snake, and so you put those tears to good use. If streaming doesn’t work out, you’ll just become an actress. Hollywood would love you. Your PR firm sure as fuck wouldn’t, though.

Rae was having none of it. She said you’ll figure it out eventually. Told you to channel your superior puzzle skills. You were quick to remind her that you can barely count to ten without having an aneurysm. Oddly serious, she admitted that she worries for you sometimes. Why only sometimes?! you demanded. She merely sighed. uttering under her breath something that sounded closely to “Boke.”

You leave her for barely a week and she’s already neck deep in the gay volleyball anime, hoodie and cardboard cutout and everything. Your life is falling apart.

But Brooklyn is nice. It had snowed when you stepped off of the plane. Thousands of snowflakes sprinkling into your hair, dotting your cheeks and nose. You missed this sight back in Cali. You missed your parents, too. 

Home cooked meals, old sweaters, your old room and about 40GB worth of old high school pictures on your computer. You went through them all one night. Some were stomach churning, cringe inducing nightmares. You were especially fond of those. Texted some of your friends that were still in Brooklyn, met up, decided to bake. Bad idea, Rae was the resident chef back in Cali. Besides laughing till your stomach hurt, and almost burning down your kitchen, nothing all that significant happened. Somewhere down the line, at about 3 am, half-way through a cheesy rom-com you had the overwhelming urge to text Corpse.

That’s where the problems really started. God, you missed California, missed being in the same timezone with a guy you hadn’t even met yet, how embarrassing is that?! You missed skating around and taking pictures of the beach in the setting sun, sending it to him, silently wishing he was with you to admire the view. 

You really want to call him. And to hang out with him. But for some reason, the thought of that springs up immediate anxiety and you shy away from asking. Him sending you cute good morning texts doesn’t help, either. Maybe it’s better he doesn’t know that you’re a blushing, stuttering mess each time you read “baby”. 

Late evening. Your stream is already set up, people are slowly trickling in and you greet them with a grin and a soft “Hello! Hi hi!”. You did your best to make your room a perfectly chaotic backdrop - led lights, an embarrassing amount of anime merch and plushies. You always try to balance out your weeb side by dressing hot as fuck for your streams - today’s inspiration just so happens to be egirls. Mostly because you watched one too many egirl make-up tutorials on TikTok, and also because you’ve been listening to Corpse’s song all day.

Yeah, no, who are you kidding, you dressed up this way because you were hoping Corpse was watching your stream. You didn’t forget your cat headphones, either. You know he likes them. You want to make him suffer. Perhaps then, finally, he will ask you out, so you wouldn’t have to.

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“I feel like,” You start when you put away your phone, staring idly at the chat, “I feel like I need a new name for you guys. Calling you guys after two years of streaming is just... weird, no? I also don’t respect men so I don’t want to call you guys. Like, so many creator’s have, like, a name for their fans. Uhm, Cody Ko has the chodesters, Kurtis Conner has, uh, folks? Kurtis Town? Citizens! Markiplier has mommy issues--” You can’t help snorting, “So, I’ve been, like, thinking - I know, shocking! - so I was thinking I’m gonna name you cockroaches. Because you’re grimy little shits impossible to kill. And also then I can use the legendary Minaj meme ROACHES!”

Your stream enthusiastically echoes ROACHES, making the chat swim. Yes, if anyone would enjoy such a name, it would be your audience. You’re as equally proud as you are disturbed.

“Well, anyway.” Leaning back into your chair, you throw your arms out with a bright grin, “Big dick is back in town, baby! If you noticed the backdrops different, it’s cuz I’m in Brooklyn now. Don’t ask me when I will return to Always Sunny, I don’t plan that far ahead.”

While Minecraft boots up, you decide to answer a few questions.

r u dating sykkuno?

You want to smack your head into the keyboard, but as it is, you can’t exactly afford a new one, so you refrain, “No, Sykkuno and I are not dating, we are just good friends. Uhm, I’m not sure how much I’ll have to repeat this, but, we really aren’t, so if the roaches could chill - Oh my God, that sounds so stupid, I love it - uh, yeah, if the roaches could chill that’d be great.”

the roaches lmao sounds like we’re a sports team

“Oh shit, yeah it does, uh-- maybe I can make like, jerseys or something. That’d be cool, I think.”

how disappointed are your parents with the way your life turned out?

“My parents are actually not disappointed at all!” You say with a cute little smile, “Uhm, they’re both really proud, actually. They’re glad I found something I love doing and made a job outta it. Dad finds my Youtube videos endearing. Yes, they watch pretty much all of my videos, unless I explicitly tell them not to. And yeah, with all the fucks and thirsting for anime characters. Uhm, it was very embarrassing at first, but I mean, after a while, shame just...doesn’t exist anymore, I guess? Funny thing about my parents, actually, when they watch my videos-” You eye catches a comment, “Oh! No, they only watch my Youtube videos. They don’t know how to use Twitter, thank God. Uhm, anyway-- when they hear a name they don’t know, like, I dunno, Dabi, or something, they google--” You’re grinning by now, eyes crinkling, giggling softly, “--who that is, and buy me like, merch and stuff. It’s really cute. 

can i be adopted by ur parents plz

will you and corpse ever collab?!

You were about to answer, though the man of the hour himself decides to do it for you.

Corpse_Husband: yes.

Okay, not to say your heart skipped a beat, but it totally did. With a pleased smile, you nod, like one of those bobble head toys sold at the dollar store. The motion is oddly reminiscent of Sykkuno’s own nod. Perhaps you had picked it up from him. The chat seems to notice.

pack it up, sykkuno

More questions pile about this mysterious collab you and Corpse are planning. Yeah, you’d like to hear more about it, too, since he single highhandedly decided one was happening right now. Corpse remains silent. Fine, keep your secrets. 

“Okay, guys, oh, I mean, roaches, Oh my God--” You’re covering your mouth, giggling, “-calling all roaches, calling all roaches, calm down. Everyone grab a snack and a blanket I’m turning up the music volume so we can all chill. Entering chill zone. Entering chill zone. Roaches, prepare.”

we are prepared

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An hour or so passes and you grow hungry. It shows with the amount of cakes you had baked in your server. Currently, you find yourself throwing eggs at the wall of one of the renovated houses, your face scrunched in concentration and slight frustration. 24 of the 50 eggs have been wasted. “What’s a girl gotta do to get some chicks around here?” you had uttered under your breath, until, finally, a screech - the egg finally spawns a mob. Your mouth falls open, “Aww, look!” You approach it, so small, walking in zigzags beside you, “It’s a baby chicken! Die, bitch.” The baby chicken is no more as you swing your bedazzled (you have mods) diamond sword. You’re cackling by the time the dust settles.

y/n is a child murderer

“Roaches,” You address your fan-base, spurring another fit of laughter - you can’t get over the name, “I think I’m like, forgetting that eating in Minecraft won’t actually make less hungry in real life.”

take a break and go eat queen <3

“Fuck no, we starve and die like men. Now I actually really need another chicken.”

Another twenty minutes trickle by and you’re trying to lure back a panda from the jungle when there’s a knock on your bedroom’s door. Whipping your head to the side, you slide down your headphones. At the same time, your mom pokes her head through the ajar door, “MOM!” You scream, “Get OUT of my room I’m playing Minecraft!” But your yell has no actual bite to it, as you don’t manage to hide your smile. Your mom laughs, doing some sort of sign language and motioning for you to follow her with her head. That or it’s some sort of performative dance. 

“I’m live right now,” You tell her, pointing at your screen. She knows this already, though, “do you want to say hi?” 

The roaches spam the chat with friendly hellos. You mom, quite impatient now, waves you over. 

“Sorry, roaches, mom needs something. Be back in a bit!”

Stopping the stream, you rush out of your seat and pleased she slinks into the hallway. “What’s this about?”

“Your pizza came.”

“My what now?” You echo, confused.

“Domino’s. You ordered pizza?”

“What? No? I was busy with the stream, I never--”

Thankfully, you had managed to grab your phone from your room before you exited. You almost choke on spit once you read the messages.

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You decide that it’ll be impossible to stream after experiencing what you had just experienced. You tweet out a quick apology to the roaches (God, that fucking name) and say that you had a breakdown but you’re okay. That is as a close to the truth as you managed to muster. It’s a sad sight, chewing and crying; your mom winced when she saw your state - disheveled hair and rundown eyeliner and everything. “D’aww,” She had muttered, caressing the top of your head, “don’t cry my little raccoon.”

If anyone was ever to ask you where did your chaotic nature come from, you’d answer with my mom. To make yourself feel better, you took a selfie - duck face and peace sign and the horrible 2000′s angle. Sent it to Rae. 

looking hot, her message read. 

thanks, was all you replied with.

You couldn’t just leave things as they were. Once you calmed down, you wanted to text Corpse, but how would you follow up the ungodly caps lock and screeching? Impossible. An idea sprung to mind, one that was brave. Taking the first step.

Instead of sending a text, you sent a voice memo.

“Thank you for the pizza, it was delicious.”

You voice still sounded a bit raspy. His reply was instant. Your heart skipped a beat. He sent a voice memo back.

“Glad you liked it, baby.”

He was going to be the death of you.

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tags (in italics is those i couldn’t tag! make sure all’s ok w your settings!) : @littlebabysandboxburritos - @fairywriter-oracle - @tsukishimawh0re - @ofstarsanddreams - @bbecc-a - @annshit - @leahh19 - @letsloveimagines - @bellomi-clarke - @wineandionysus - @guiltydols - @onephootinfrontoftheother - @liamakorn - @thirstyfangirl - @lilysdaydreams - @pan-ini - @mxqicshxp - @tanchosanke - @yoshinorecommends - @flightsandfantasy - @liljennyx3 - @slashersdream - @unknown-and-invisible - @sinister-sleep - @fivedicksinatrenchcoat - @mercury–moon - @peterparkerspjsuit - @unstableye - @simonsbluee - @shinyshimaagain - @ppopty - @siriuslystupid - @crapimahuman - @ofthedewthesunlight - @mythicalamphitrite - @artsyally - @corpsesimpp - @corpsewhitetee - @corpse-husbandsimp - @hyp-oh-critical - @roses-and-grasses - @rhyrhy462 - @sparklylandflaplawyer - @charbkgo - @airwaveee - @creativedogs - @kaitlyn2907 - @loxbbg - @afuckingunicornn - @fleurmoon - @yeolliedokai - @truly-dionysus - @multi-fandom-central707

more tags are in the comments bcs tumblr only allows me to tag 50 people max 💙

[miakataylor]

Newt x reader ~ A Cold Bed

I woke up, and the first thing I noticed was that I was in a cold bed.

I pulled the blanket up under my chin and reminded myself that a cold bed would be the only thing I'd ever wake up in again.

It was one year today. One year since I watched the love of my life die in my arms. I didn't want to get out of bed, but there was to much to be done. This wasn't a free for all. 

Everyone else seemed to know about it too, because all day I kept getting worried glances from my friends and curious ones from the other immunes. I wanted to snap at them, tell them to shuck off, but I knew they were just worried. But I didn't want them to worry, I just wanted to forget. 

I hadn't said much after... well, you know. And I didn't sing anymore either, my music and inspiration leaving me when Newt did. And it had been that way for a whole year now, not a single thing changed. 

At lunch, I grabbed an apple from the kitchen and walked down to the beach. There were a few couples there, spread out so they could have their lunch dates in peace. I wondered what it would have been like, if he was here-

'No.' I shook my head to clear my thoughts and moved on, not looking at them again as I made my way around them to where flat rocks jutted out over the ocean, and I sat down, tossing my apple from one hand to the other.

I wasn't really hungry. I had just grabbed it because I knew that if I didnt, someone would come "check up on me". 

I never really ate much anymore, but no one else needed to know that.

I sighed, and smoothed my - his - jacket down and pulled it tighter around my shoulders when the wind blew in from the ocean.

It smelled of salt and of so many other things I couldn't place. It was a small I couldn't quite explain, but I had loved since the first time I had smelled it.

I closed my eyes and let the wind blow my hair back from my face, enjoying the scent and taking in the rare moment of peace. Then that moment was broken.

I heard someone approach the rock where I sat, and then felt as they plopped down next to me, not bothering to open my eyes and look to see who the intruder of my peace was. 

"Hey." It was Minho. "Watcha doin?"

I didnt answer, instead leaning over and resting my head on his shoulder. He smelled like the ocean, too.

He wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me closer to him. "I know you probably don't want to hear this," he began hesitantly, pulling his head back to look me in the eyes.

"Minho, if this is about Newt...." I looked up at him, my exhaustion showing through. I didn't want to be reminded of everything I had lost, again.

He disregarded it, and continued on.

"But you really do have friends here who will help you move on if you would let them." I sighed, defeated, and looked back out to the ocean.

My friend continued in a quieter voice. "You know Newt wouldn't have wanted to hold you down after he was gone. I think... I think it's time to let him go."

When I didn't respond to that, he stood and began walking away, leaving me to think about his words. As he left, he was met by Brenda.

" Minho, y/n. There is a new group that just came in, and it's got a lot more people than usual. Vince asked for your guys' help."

"Alright." I stood up and followed them, slipping the apple into my pocket for later. 

This happened quite often. More people, mostly kids like us, made their way here looking for refuge, a home, protection from WCKD and the Scorch.

Minho and Brenda jogged ahead, but I was in no hurry. It's not like there was a push for time. Here, we had all the time in the world to do anything... and sometimes, that could be a curse. More often than not, I would sit alone in my thoughts... and that's when the feelings I tried so hard to push down got the better of me. 

When I reached the group, I could tell something was off. While the other immunes got the newbies, or Greenies, as we still liked to call them, all settled in, taking names and what not, I saw a group of people- my people-  not moving, just staring with shocked expressions on their faces, a few even crying.

I froze. What had happened? Did someone get hurt? Even though my mind was racing with every possible way something could have gone wrong, my feet wouldn't move. 

Then, Thomas launched himself forward, then Minho, then Brenda, and Gally wrapped his arms around the group. It took me a moment before I realized they were all hugging someone.

Minho was the first to pull back. "Wait until y/n gets here!" I heard the person receiving the affection say something, but it was to quiet to hear and I could barely make out a voice at all. I took a small step closer. 

Minho answered with, "Yes, of course she is! That girl is stronger than all of us shanks combined." The group laughed, some through their tears, and Minho turned to look for me.

I didn't move. I wasn't sure who, or what, waited for me, and when Minho's eyes met mine, I could tell he was crying.

He gestured for me to go to him, but I didnt move, my feet rooted to the spot.

He came over to me and slung an arm around my shoulder, guiding me towards the group. "Minho... what happened?"

He didn't answer, and I could feel my heart beating faster than it should have been, out of fear or excitement, I wasn't sure.

As we approached the group, my friends pulled back to reveal the object of their affection and I felt my heart stop. My breath stuck in my throat and my hand flew to cover my mouth as my eyes began to water gainst my will.

"Newt?"

It was him. It was Newt.

His hair was longer than I remembered and his skin was darker from the sun too. But it was him, really him.

An agonizingly long moment passed when all we could do was look at each other, take in the differences since we had last seen each other, trying to accept the fact that we were actually there, together again.

Then everything seemed to happen all at once. A loud sob escaped my lips amd we rushed forward, me falling I to him and him wrapping me in a hug so tight I thought I'd feel it forever. If he hadn't been holding me, I would have fallen to the ground, my knees felt so weak.

I released a sob into his shoulder, my head trying to decided if this was real or not, and my heart hoping it was. 

 After a moment, he pulled back and looked into my eyes with his own dark ones. I touched his face, moving my hand across his jaw, up his cheek, around his eye, down his nose and ended on his lips.

"You're really here..." I was shaken, sure I was dreaming. "I watched you die..."

He shook his head. "WCKD found me. Well, what was left of WCKD." He glanced at Thomas when he said that. "Saved my life, gave me the cure... then tried to use me as their lab rat again. I got away, thanks to what was left of that Lawrence guy's army, and then it was arranged for me to come here with the next group...."

Vince walked up to us and shook Newts hand, beaming. "Its good to have you back with us. You've been... very missed."

Newt nodded his thanks, and pulled me closer to him, if that was possible.

After Vince had walked away, he tucked his head into the crook of my neck and whispered against my skin, "God, I missed you so much."

My tears began after that, and entire years worth of unfathomable sadness and bottles up grief pouring out in that moment. I cried, letting out all of the anger I didn't know I had stored up, all of the pain I had felt, all of the loss. 

"Promise me," I said through my tears, my voice breaking. "Promise me you'll never leave me again. Where you go, I will go too."

"I promise... where you go, I go."

Later that night, there was a celebration to welcome the Greenies to their new home. "How does it feel to be a Greenie again, Newt?" Fry pan teased at one point. "Better than you can imagine," he laughed, looking at me.

After catching up with the others, Newt led me back to our now shared hut, and pulled me into a hug.

"Y/n?"

"Hmm?"

"Will you marry me?"

I pulled back to look in his eyes, see if he truly meant it. He held my gaze expectantly and I felt tears sting my eyes once more and I nodded my head, unable to say anything for fear I would break down again.

"I love you so much," he said, his voice thick with emotion and his accent as soft and as strong as I remembered it.

"I love you too," I whispered, and kissed him without thinking.

He held my neck with one hand and pulled me closer with the other, kissing me back with the passion of a long lost lover.

We broke apart finally, our heads resting against each others as we breathed.

Then he picked me up and carried me over to our bed, kissing me all the way.

That night, just before I fell asleep, I heard him whisper, "I have been so lost without you... and now I am home."

I smiled for the first time in forever and drifted off with the thought, 'I'll never wake up in a cold bed again.'

~ 

8/10/21

[heyitsyn]

Manager!Seijoh

a/n: im a seijoh stan and theyre my little plant babies

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

this is so long oml i hate myself

theyre an actual boy band istg

lets be honest, they probably thought you were just another oikawa fangirl

they thought you just wanted to be closer to their captain bc you were another delusional girl who wanted to live out her fantasies

lmao im not trying to be salty

but when you just stared blankly at oikawa tooru after he called you a beautiful flower,

stageplay hinata calling you a mugwort

the team just about threw themselves on your feet

tbh you werent really there to get a boyfriend or for oikawa

you just needed an after school club and the other teams already had managers

the only sport that didnt was the boys volleyball team

imagine why

you were actually a little wary, since you knew of oikawa, being a first year yourself, and you were aware of his psycho fangirls who could probably kill you

but you needed a club that would last you for the next 3 years to graduate

it was kunimi who actually recommended being a manager

you were in his class and you noticed him sleeping in the morning so you gave him your energy bar

‘thanks’

you shrugged and smiled

thats why he tolerated you more than others

you were nice and you were the only one who noticed his tiredness, even the teacher left him alone, and did something about it

sometimes, you even gave him an energy drink

‘can you tell me why youve been so tired lately? i dont think ive seen you wake up until lunch’

he opened the snack and started munching while replying

‘early morning practice for volleyball is still a big adjustment. our captain demands us to be there 6 in the morning sharp and if we’re even a minute late, we’d have to run laps. like for every minute youre late, you have to run those amount’

oh my why is kunimi talking so much

but i love kunimi and first year seijoh boys rights in this household is valid

you furrowed your eyebrows

‘but yall are still growing and you need all your sleep. if i were there, id yell at your captain’

he grinned slightly, imagining your short height beating up their captain

‘meh. you want to be our manager? i saw you looking at the clubs board yesterday and we dont have one so you could take the opportunity and beat him up then’

ofc you agreed bc kunimi was best boi and you just wanted him to have enough sleep for once

after class, he waited for you to finish packing up and when you finished, yall left the classroom

until another guy with a spiky hairstyle joined you and you noticed him as the guy who sometimes came over to eat lunch with kunimi

‘oh, hello l/n-san’

you smiled gently

‘drop the formalities, kindaichi-kun. its only fair.’

he nodded before walking beside kunimi

‘kindaichi, l/n might be our new manager’

the onion head excitedly looked at you

‘really?! yes! so we dont have to fill our bottles ourselves anymore!’

kunimi glared at him and slapped his stomach

‘shes our manager, not our maid’

you laughed but placed an arm on him

‘its okay. i was a manager for my middle school volleyball team so i know a little bit about being one’

the two shared a look

god, they really hit the jackpot

as yall walked closer to the gym, you noticed the big pile of girls huddling at the corner

kunimi sighed

‘l/n, ill warn you ahead of time of our captain. hes kinda,,,, too much’

but you flashed him a smile

‘hes not the first one ive handled’

oml player-chan!!!

so when you opened the door and entered the gym and oikawa hit you with his normal antics, you just stared at him

‘okay and?’

hanamaki and mattsun howled before rushing to you and grabbing you in a hug

‘girls like her really exist!!’

you gave kunimi and kindaichi a signal of help and they nodded before gently prying the senpais off of you

‘senpai, please’

you gave kunimi a grateful nod

coach irihata went up to you bc wow, kunimi has a friend with of another gender?

‘how can we help you, miss?’

‘im l/n y/n, first year, and id like to apply as the manager’

internally, the coach sighed bc you werent the first one to apply

the reason they havent had a manager for years was bc of oikawa’s fangirls hiding themselves under that false facade

but he saw you brush off that comment oikawa make with no hint of fluster or blush on your face so he decides to give you a trial run, in guise of seeing if you could handle these chaotic boys

‘do you have any experience as manager? or do we need to teach you the ropes?’

‘i was a manager for 3 years in my middle school volleyball’

he nodded

‘ill give you one month. a trial run of a month to test the waters’

you agreed and your trial run began

kunimi mentioned that morning practice starts at 6 am sharp so you set your alarm for 5 to get ready and get to school on time before the boys

you remembered how to set up the nets so you quickly put them out (using a step stool bc we short) and ran to get the basket of balls

their water bottles were filled and you were in the middle of lugging the big basket of towels when the third years entered

the 4 of them usually came earlier than the rest so they saw you dragging the basket of fresh towels and wipe your sweat before smiling at the work youve done

iwa was so happy bc it was usually him who did this stuff and now that he had someone do it for him, it was like a god-send

oikawa’s eyes shone and he waved at you

‘yohoo, y/n-chan!’

you cringed at the loud voice of the famous oikawa tooru

‘hello, oikawa-san’

he chuckled at your politeness before hugging you

‘you did all this for us? youre so cute, y/n-chan!’

instead of the normal blush and love-struck eyes, you were actually very uncomfortable of the sudden skinship and you quickly ran to the side when iwa hit him at the head

‘shittykawa! leave her alone!’

‘iwa-chan!’

makki and mattsun stood next to you as the boys did their usual fight

‘is this all an act or are you really not attracted to oikawa?’

mattsun shot him a surprised look bc why was he so straightforward

but you just shrugged

‘hes cute, i admit. but ive seen much cuter and the boys in my middle school team was basically full of him so,,, and i hate guys who think theyre all that just bc theyre blessed w a pretty face. if anything, ill probably go for iwaizumi-san’

pop off S I S T E R!!!

you just won the heart of these two

slowly but surely, they all came to accept you and iwa straight out loves you bc you maintained this routine for the whole month of your trial run

and you still remained indifferent of oikawa’s advances and he was even impressed and slightly agitated that you werent paying attention to him

‘y/n-chan, one date! just one!’

you huffed before looking up from your clipboard

‘i like men, oikawa-san. not boys’

that comment made the guys shriek

‘y/n-chan! youre just a first year! you dont need a man!’

‘youre not a man, oikawa!’

you left oikawa to be tormented by his teammates and went to go and hand over the report to the coach

he was impressed by the notes you made bc they were ones he even missed

like the split-second of hesitation that kindaichi usually has that goes unnoticed but you immediately saw

or the wince oikawa has whenever he so much as jumps an inch

you could even tell the difference between iwa’s spike and if he was being easy or he was going full-out

this added on to the fact that the boys loved you and irihata actually saw kunimi try more 

but he thinks its only to earn your praises

‘y/n, youre officially the team manager’

yall celebrated at the normal hang-out spot which was the ramen shop and it truly shocked you at how much these boys ate

granted, this was the first time you ate together but you didnt expect them to eat nearly 5 bowls each

you could only finish 2 and you already feel like throwing up

‘honestly, how do you guys not gain weight after this?’

the table you sat at, iwa, kindaichi, mattsun, and kunimi, looked at you and shrugged

‘i work out’

‘i run’

‘i fast’

‘i poop it out’

lmao im sorry i cackled too hard at this

you stared blankly at mattsun’s answer who said it so seriously that you snorted a laugh

they watched you and your laughter bc you havent really expressed yourself as much 

so they made it their goal to see you laugh more

‘y/n-chan! you need to eat more!’

oikawa shouted, clearly food drunk, but you shook your head aggressively

‘i only planned to eat one bowl but he just had to shove another down my throat’

‘but you need to grow, y/n-chan!’

‘i want to grow taller! not wider!!’

As a manager:

oh boy

you basically grew into kinda their mom

‘oikawa-san! you need to rest your knee or youre going to hurt yourself! i will drag you home myself!’

‘kunimi, if you try to get this one more spike, i’ll buy you a bag of those caramel bites you like’

‘iwa-san! if you hit oikawa-san too much, youll destroy the little braincells he has!’

‘yahaba-san, nice dump!’

‘is your knee okay, watari-san?’

yall really forget that watari and yahaba exist sometimes smh

it was part of the work

keeping up with seijoh

so to keep them encouraged, you gave them praises that they always demand for and they always turn to you whenever they did something good

mattsun gives you a look whenever he blocks iwa’s spikes and you give kindaichi a head pat whenever he blocks some too

bc of how you are with them, sometimes, they forget that you are actually just a first year

they get shocked whenever you walk in with kunimi and kindaichi and talk about the current homework bc it slips their mind that their hard-working manager was actually just a 15-year-old girl

so, they try to ease the burden whenever they can

like iwa offering to help you whenever you have to take their jerseys to the laundrymat

or offering to help you with your assignments since theyve only been through it once

more like watari, yahaba, and iwa bc the matsuhana are clueless and acts like they completely skipped that grade

also

!!!!

oikawa’s fangirls ltr dont leave you alone!!!

now, its known that youre the manager of the volleyball team bc oikawa has boasted about your efforts and such

this obvs ticked off a bunch of girls bc they were jealous that you got to spend more time in a single practice with their precious oikawa-senpai than they have their entire lives

more than once theyve cornered you to threaten you to stay away from their senpai or youll have something coming for you

you never take them seriously bc you can fight too and you just give them a look and push them away

but this one time

TRIGGER WARNING-START

okay tea

the self-proclaimed president of the oikawa tooru fanclub, kenta miyo, cornered you at the bathroom with her other minions

you were just washing your hands and drying them off when she marched up to you and grabbed your hair before tugging it back

obviously you were surprised and shouted

‘oi! what the hell?!’

‘you slut! you need to stay away from my tooru, got it?!’

ehm what

you hissed and wrenched her arm from your hair and pushed her away

your hair was now a mess and you were fuming, already sick and tired of the torture these girls put you through

‘he belongs to himself, not you! so stop being delusional and leave me alone already!’

she signalled for the girls to hold on to you which you slapped away but they forcefully grabbed your arm while you kicked at them and struggle to get out of their hold

jesus what do these girls eat

miyo watches you struggle with a smile and cackles

‘oh? no fight anymore, little kouhai?’

you glared at her

‘i dont want to beat yall up bc id get yelled at by tooru so you need to let me go or regret it’

at the mention of his first name, her eyes widened and her face twisted and she slapped you

‘oi! respect your senpai, you brat! dont you ever say oikawa’s first name!’

your lips curled

‘oh? thats funny, because he actually told me to call him that since he wants his cute little manager to be very comfortable with him’

you achieved a feat that she has been working to get her entire high school life and miyo was not happy

‘ive been with him for 3 years and you just suddenly show up out of nowhere and call him that?! i dont think so!’

she had her hands around your neck and you gripped her arms, making her wince

but you laughed at that comment

‘heh, thats pathetic, isn’t it? here you are, my senpai, who has been vying for his attention for 3 years only to be ignored yet a mere first year, who shows up out of nowhere, has been asked to a date nearly a million times every day. that must be tough’

she shrieked at that comment and threw you on the floor, making you accidentally hit your head at the edge of the sink

yall im actually so bothered by this scene and im wincing as im typing

you bit your lip to prevent any sound of pain to escape bc you knew thats what she wanted to hear from you

but you werent going to give her the satisfaction

instead, you looked up at her, hatred swirling in your eyes

‘youre freaking psycho, you know that? once tooru and hajime knows about this, theyre going to give you hell. they wont ever let this go bc im the manager of their prized team and their little baby sister. so go ahead, do what you want with me. bc i paid too much for these nails to be tainted by dirt like you’

saiyo, a girl you noticed to be watari’s classmate when you went and visited him, nervously tugged on miyo’s jacket

‘miyo, we should go-’

‘SHES BLUFFING. AND HERE, SINCE YOUR SOCCERFIELD FOREHEAD IS BLEEDING, LET ME HELP WASH IT OUT’

and she poured over a carton of banana milk over you, making you wince at the sticky and cold liquid

the tough facade was crumbling and you were now screaming for help in your head, hoping that stupid theory from yahaba about team telepathy to work

but it didnt

TRIGGER WARNING-END

when miyo and her girls left, you sat on the floor, soaked and sticky and bleeding

then you begin to cry angry tears

you were angry that you were being treated like this just bc you were a manager

you were angry that you let them do that to you

you were angry that you prized your nails more than punching her square in the nose

you were just angry

periodt

staggering on your own feet, you stood up and leaned on the sink, eyes widening at the dripping red liquid from the gash on your forehead, staining the porcelain sink

you were stupid and unconsciously touched it making you wince 

‘shit, that hurts’

you whined quietly

there was little you can do with toilet paper and water to clean yourself up but you managed to at least stop the bleeding

you knew you had to be put on concussion protocol just in case bc you that hit was quite hard but at the moment, that wasnt your concern

practice has already started and this was the first time you werent present for daily practice

this was confirmed at the constant buzzing of your phone in your skirt pocket which you didnt listen to and instead, started thinking of ways to go to your locker and get your stuff and fake being sick but at the same time, not be seen and relayed to the team

time was ticking and you had to come up with a plan fast before oikawa will send the team to come looking around the building for you

once you looked at your reflection and smiled big, you decided it was enough to not show the pain you were in right now

girl im hurting for you

you peeked out of the bathroom door and saw the coast was clear so you quickly ran to your classroom, which was thankfully empty, and quickly grabbed your things

but as you were packing up, the tears just kept falling

it didnt stop as you bolted down the stairs, using your cardigan to hide your face from the public

once you were safely out of school grounds, you finally took out your phone and reviewed through all the worried and concerned texts from the team group chat

but you just replied, ‘im fine but i just feel really sick right now. girl stuff’

you smirked, knowing that would keep the boys away

but oikawa had to go and ask you to call him

‘y/n-chan! do you want oikawa-senpai to come over with chocolates and ice cream?! wings or no wings?!’

your jaw dropped at the question and clearly scandalized by the question

the team was too as shouting began and you could faintly hear iwa scream, ‘oh my god, shittykawa!’

‘im seriously okay, oikawa-san. i just need to be alone right now and ill try and get some sleep. good bye’

then you hung up

there was no way you could tell them

they were in their last year anyways so doing something about it wouldnt matter

and you were strong 

but apparently not strong enough to fight them off though

you would cover the wound with concealer and continue on with practice tomorrow as if everything was normal

but there was only so much you could take

just yesterday, they trashed your locker and a week ago, they took your bento and threw it away

you even got into a fight with this one girl but she scampered away, too scared to do anything alone

so you were actually just tired and want everyone to leave you alone

believe me, youve thought of quitting sometimes

but youve actually created a bond with these boys

like when you take hanamaki to get cream puffs whenever he loses against iwa in arm wrestling

or when yahaba calls you at ungodly hours to express his worries for next year and to fill oikawa’s shoes

it was simple moments that you shared with each player that kept you from not leaving

soon, you found yourself crying again and the looks pedestrians were giving you was starting to make you uncomfortable

a girl, with her gross hair in a bun, puffy eyes with a bleeding wound and walking down the street

that was a sight

so you cut a corner to an alley by your house to escape from the judging eyes and you were too busy wiping your eyes to see a boy who was crouched down on the floor and ended up walking over him

omg my baby kyoken hello luv!!!!

you gasped and you were surprised and quickly apologized

kyotani was originally about to yell at you, no matter what, but he saw the state you were in and concluded you were either from a fight or was beaten up

he recognized that and decided to just glare at you and go back to feeding the stray dogs and cats

you breathed a sigh in relief when he didnt yell at you bc that wouldve been the last thing you needed today

‘sir, im sorry for hitting you. if there is something i could do for you, dont hesitate’

he ignored you and you focused on him paying attention to the strays

going into your backpack, you had a milk carton and a sausage stick from earlier

you used your thermos lid to serve as the milk bowl for the cats while you peeled open the meat and used your scissors to cut chunks of it for the dogs to have some

kyotani watched as you went into action to feeding the animals that people usually ignored

he knew you

well, he recognized you

when he watched from the top of the gym, he saw you as their manager who ran around and helped everyone

sure, he still didnt trust you 

but he watched you grin and smile as the animals started to eat

‘im in a hurry right now so i have to go but ill feed you again tomorrow, okay? you too, stranger-san. ill bring food for you too’

then you stood up and ran away, probably in a hurry to fix that wound

he wouldve offered to treat it for you but he remained silent, watching the cats mewl at the now empty lid

the next day, oikawa was worried for you and when he saw you at early morning practice, he practically glomped to your side

‘y/n-chan! you okay?! oikawa-senpai was so worried for you!’

you cringed but nodded

‘im okay, oikawa-san’

‘senpai, y/n-chan! call me senpai!’

‘im not going to feed into your kink, oikawa-san’

*cue everyone busting a lung*

to this day, no one still knew what happened to you

you kept it quiet and you were sure you got everything handled

except for one person

kyotani was smart and for some reason he knew you got beat up by the fangirls and the perpetrators were easily found bc he saw them huddled around your locker, probably trashing it again, and lets just say, 

no one is def going to mess w you now

back to manager moments!!

during practice matches, the boys rally around you to prevent other teams from sweet-talking you

they make sure no one gets past them and always have excuses to get your attention

you knew what they were doing but you pretended not to, heart warming at their protectiveness and hunger for your attention

even though you have your own jacket, the team gives you theirs all the time like oikawa has his special team jacket w his name at the back and when he feels threatened by schools like johzenji, he makes you wear it

‘youre mine, y/n-chan and i want that blondie to know’

‘ehm, no, oikawa-san. im iwaizumi-san’s’

oikawa screamed

lmao training camps w them is CHAOTIC

YOU WANT TO CRYYYYYY

OIKAWA IS CRYING BC IWAIZUMI IS BEATING HIM UP, MATSUHANA ARE FREAKING OUT THE FIRST YEARS ABOUT THE GHOSTS IN THE WOODS AND NOW KINDAICHI REFUSES TO LET GO OF YOU, WATARI GOT LOST GOING TO THE BATHROOM AND YAHABA IS SCREAMING ABOUT THE WEATHER MESSING UP HIS HAIR AND MAKING IT FRIZZY

reminder: threaten to quit everytime they get too much

your hugs are the best!!!!

you have a special hug for every player

oikawa gets his favorite which was the normal arm around the waist with your arms around his neck while he snuggles in your neck

iwa gets flustered easily so you hug him from behind so you cant see his flustered look

mattsun actually likes the jumping in the air so he catches you type of hug

makki is more tame and has his arms around your shoulder with his chin on your head

yahaba is the twirly kind where he just picks you up and swings you around

watari also gets flustered easily so he likes the one-arm hugs

kindaichi gets blushy at the slightest touch from you but he gives you a hug from behind you himself where he can bury his face in your hair while you caress his arms

kunimi, now he likes it when you squeeze him extremely tight bc it makes him feel loved and feel alive

kyo doesnt even talk to you what makes you think you can give him a hug

their lost for shiratorizawa really broke them though

you made them their own bentos for nearly a week to keep them encouraged and gave oikawa extra attention to keep him from sulking or practicing late

‘oikawa-senpai, lets go watch that new movie later’

‘S-S-SENPAI?!’

then the arrival of our baby kyoken

yahaba was moody the whole practice and you were currently trying to keep him from spiking a ball to someone

‘even just today, he’s late’

‘who?’

‘that stupid dog’

he just keeps mumbling and grunting

and then the said dog arrived

you peaked out from behind iwaizumi, who protectively went in front of you

shock ran through you and you pointed at him

‘puppy-kun!’

lmao puppy what

youve called him that since he refused to tell you his name, but you call him that bc he paid special attention to this one baby beagle

he raised a hand in greeting and you gave him a smile

‘youre a player here, too?!’

he ‘glared’ at you but nodded stiffly

the team really thought that he would lash out at you but he is surprisingly tolerant

the power of the manager

he still hasnt talked to you but he does respond to you and even helps you with chores, still not talking ofc

hes so tsun tsun and he deserves my heart yall

however, youve heard him talk to iwaizumi, and iwaizumi only, so youve heard his voice before

ngl, you were flustered by how gruff and deep it was

then their loss to karasuno

bruh, it was KARASUNO

the entire team fell apart and after the match, each of them ran away from you to stop lashing out

you were also on the verge of crying, seeing the broken look on your third years

your precious third years

you decided to give them their own space but you heard a loud banging sound from the bathroom

yahaba and watari were outside, clearly trying to talk to someone in there on coming out but it got louder

okay you were lowkey like, ‘hm, i should not be here’

but you recognized that voice

you knocked at the boys door to be respectful

‘kyo-san? its me, y/n’

he was silent but he did unlock it

you took this as a sign to enter and you gave yahaba and watari a smile

‘i’ll be fine. go to kindaichi and kunimi. they need your comfort right now’

tbh, you were surprised the bathroom was still intact but you saw the stall door at the very end being rattled and shaken

you remained by the door but you wanted to go to him

‘kyo-san, please come out so i can treat your injuries’

he expected you to say those words like ‘its okay’ or ‘theres always next year’ but you didnt

instead, you knew he was hurt and wanted to help him

he continued to give a few punches to the wall and the door before emerging

you wordlessly treated the wounds and offered your hand

‘im here, kyo-san. dont worry, im right here’

at the ramen shop, you told them to eat as much as they want and wordlessly gave them your card, slightly crying inside bc you know this was going to be like over a hundred dollars

but you were treating the boys bc they deserved it

you sat beside kindaichi, who was just sobbing and apologizing, so you were wiping his tears and holding his hand under the table

this precious babie

bruh i was sobbing when i watched this part like uuggghhhh

after dinner, you walked with the other third years, knowing they would go to the gym, so you gave everyone else your special hugs before sending them home

‘text me when you arrive safely, okay?’

‘yes, mom’

‘KINDAICHI WHAT’

oikawa’s speech made you cry bc despite only knowing them for not even a year, you already feel like a family

you didnt want your family to be broken but you knew they would all go their separate ways eventually

there was a big hug pile of third years on the side where you took a picture and sent it to the group chat

you had to eventually go home after helping them clean up and when you checked your phone, a fresh batch of tears rolled down

each from every person on the team but with the same sentence and same words

‘we love you, l/n y/n. thanks for everything.’

ngl i dont think this was that good and its like 8 in the morning and im extremely tired

i want to do karasuno, nekoma, and fukurodani but im so exhausted i cannot right now

[fucktheroyals]

You know after reading and reading and reading peoples theories and the meta from before the spn finale aired and the meta writers reactions to the finale I think I have a theory of my own. We don't have any answers tho, so this is pure speculation. If you wanna add something to support or discredit any of this that's cool but there's too many things floating around. Know I dont have proof for this conclusion at all. A lot of what I say is just guesses based on previous facts.

This all came together in my head when I realized how much this finale REEKS of the original producers and who the show was originally for. It REEKS of Robert Singer. Like if the execs started saying they didn't want it, Robert Singer was the one pushing that the story was about the brothers. That kinda thing.

Then, I was thinking of the problems in this episode and it struck me these are all of Supernatural biggest issues and to be honest all of it feels completely deliberate.

Take the sexism for example, Supernatural in it's later seasons largely out grew this, we have Jody, Rowena, Donna, Charlie, Mary, Claire (and even a wayward sisters pilot with MORE women/girls) all making regular appearances. They're mainly good characters and mostly aren't there to hurt our boys. Rowena, of course, is the one outlier being very about herself but it's clear she still cares for them, I mean its part of her development. But they're all real, with character flaws just like everyone else. (And we have Death too and she was POC 😭 THANK GOD)

Now look at the earlier half of Spn, we have Ellen and Jo, who's appearances were far in between. There's Bela in season 3, recurring for quite a bit (5 eps), but she is a character that is only there for herself, definitely not found family (unlike Ellen & Jo), and she's got more episodes in season 3 than Ellen and Jo in season 2 who aren't seen again til season 5. The "fans" send in hate mail after hate mail to try to get these characters off, and eventually they are. Then there's Ruby who's character stayed for a whole two seasons and was a largely recurring character. Why does she get to say so long? She's a plot device. She's supposed to be there to betray Sam. She has to stay (plus Jared obviously likes her). But she's not just a character the writers like writing about. Same with Lilith. Obviously not as recurring but still a plot device. Did they get hate mail tho? You can bet on it. Why? because tHeY'rE gOnNa PuSh ThE bOyS (Dean and Sam) aPaRt ThE sHoW iS aBoUt ThE bOyS oNlY. Without even thinking about the hate mail, just notice how large the difference is from how women are seen in the earlier seasons to the later seasons. Misha got tons of hate mail too for being a character that could split up the boys (probably only being allowed to say because he a man, thanks sexist producers and execs).

Only after Castiel was killed off and then Castiel fans successfully (thank you guys) got him back on the show did the hate mail largely simmer, which means female character's were allowed to stay! Which has lead us to a show with a good amount of female characters. But can you imagine having to kill characters off time and time again because people keep complaining that the show is "only about the boys." Fun times really.

So now we get to this final and we see sexism. But it wasn't just the plain old regular sexism you find in the earlier days of spn. Because now, there ARE women to talk about, talk to. But this episode was DESOLATE women wise, unless they were used for plot (which is also sexist!). Small scenes, they're barely there. Women gets her tongue cut out. Random women from s1 gets killed. Sam doesn't SPEAK of Eileen. Nothing. No mention of any female characters from the boys mouths unless they were from/in this episode itself. That's WIERD. I know we've all said it. But that goes beyond forgetting about characters. I mean its SAM'S GIRLFRIEND for Christ's sake. There is NO REASON they couldn't have said Eileen's name. Notice how Sam's wife is just... faceless. This is literally an age old sexist trope. Like... one of the things about bringing Mary back to life for s12+ is that it takes this trope... of basically a generic mother, and gives her life and feelings, whether you like them or not, they're real feelings. They said Mary isn't just a mom she's a person. Mary's existence in the later half of spn is to fix this kind of female tropes that fall upon her character, to not let these her stay a 2 dimensional character. They said we should know she's more than just the mom who tried to save her kid. Do that is the exact opposite of Sam getting a nameless, faceless wife. The sexism of the old spn wasn't just brought back, it was completely amplified. It wasn't just accidental or some exec "fixing" the story it was DELIBRATE. Whoever wrote that, didn't do ALL OF THAT by accident. Because an exec or a producer who doesn't see the flaws in old supernatural isn't going to write it that deliberately.

Let's bring it back to s10 when Charlie was killed (singer was mainly to blame). Dead in the bathtub, age old classic of burying ur gays. If you were here you know people never let Supernatural live that down. THEY KNOW what bury ur gays means. Hell, Robbie Thompson left because of Charlie's death and you think the writers don't know what it means? I mean both Bobo Berens (especially) and Steve Yockey's careers are centered around LGBT+ storytelling and you think they don't know? They know. They know.

And Dean wasn't just apart of the bury your gays trope, it is so far BEYOND that. Dean being killed on a rusty nail/screw, the tongues ripped out, things that seemed to be meant for other people. Jensen's acting in the last two episodes was giving us "DEAN RECIPROCATES" but no one ever actually saying it. I think it's clear that Dean was killed for being Bi. They didn't address it for a reason, they just silenced him. His narrative was supposed to be about letting him be HIM for the first time, to say what his feelings are instead of having them miscommunicated, and instead of doing that, they just silenced him. And the more we look at this scene the more horrific it gets. The more it's a complete slap in the face and it's supposed to be. Some guy who knows nothing about the LGBT can't write a scene this horrific.

Some guy who knows nothing about Dean couldn't write a scene that deconstructs all of Dean's character development and gives Dean his worst nightmare. I MEAN DEAN WANTED TO LIVE HIS LIFE! THEY DIDNT HIDE THAT JOB APPLICATION (or whatever job related thing that was) IN THERE FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES THEY WANT YOU TO KNOW THIS IS THE ABSOLUTE WORST SITUATION. Dean isn't Barney from HIMYM. If you watched HIMYM then you'll know Barney went from being a stereotypical ladies man and treating women terribly to being in love with a women and treating her right and working hard for it. The last episode of HIMYM (why its so bad) Barney's character development is thrown out and he's back to being a stereotypical ladies man. You don't need to know Barney's character very much to do that.

To kill Dean during a hunt his father never finished, to not have anyone at his funeral, to have Dean die young like his life didn't matter. Those are Dean's worst fears and you'd only truly know that if you watched the gin episode in s3, where they are basically laid out for you. You HAVE to know Dean's character to tear him apart like this.

This episode took all the core elements of the show and did a complete 180° the name of the episode itself is "Carry on" and Dean and Sam very much did not carry on. Sam grieving his entire life so that he good get to heaven and see Dean again. Dean being ready to live his life, despite the enormous pitfalls and learning to love himself only to be killed. "Family don't end with blood." Um.... it did in that episode either literally with Dean's death or you know BECAUSE NONE OF THEIR FOUND FAMILY WAS THERE. Not Jack, Not Cas, Not Eileen, Not Donna, Not Charlie, Not Jody, Not Claire... on and on we go. No one was there, nobody was even mentioned. Dean's funeral, no one even called that we know of. It was just Sam and Dean. Sam and Dean. And Bobby. Don't forget Bobby. But yeah Sam and Dean.

That's what the show is about right, the brothers.

Except it's not anymore. It hasn't been for years.

Cas not being there was deafening but it brought us to a major point. Becky. Becky's telling us about the terrible ending.

And many of us are wondering why would they literally tell us this is the worst ending and then... make it the ending.

Now before we move on, it very apparent many of you think Dabb doesn't ship Deancas. And Dabb doesn't care about the characters.

Say what you will about any plot holes in his writing, the point he is VERY GOOD at writing the characters, and giving us good ones.

Why do we know Dabb ships Deancas? (ill say when its cowrote, other wise its not) cowrote ep 8.02 - purgatory "I prayed to you, Cas, every night" "Cas, Buddy, I need you." "I have a price on my head, and I've been trying to stay one step ahead of them, to – to keep them away from you." 8.08 Hunteri Heroici - Cas helps them hunt! 😊❤ Dean & Cas have a serious convo about why Cas doesn't want to see/go to heaven. 8.22 Dean's mad at Cas. Sam's explanation of why Dean should be easy on Cas: "It's Cas." Dean then points out how he'd knife anybody else if they did what Cas did. 9.10 - Cas comforts Dean when Dean can't take seeing Sam (Gadreel) being tortured anymore. Also tons of Cas. 9.20 (bloodlines) - Canonical couple parallel "I was there, where were you" 9.22 The angels make Cas choose between them and killing Dean and he "gave up an entire army for one guy" 10.09 Claire's reintroduction. Cas heavy ep. DeanCas date. 10.22 THE PRISONER - u know the ep where Dean beats the shit out of Cas but loves him enough to not kill him.

We COULD keep going but I think I've made my point. If Robert Singer is the guy that is like "the show is about Sam and Dean only" Andrew Dabb is the DeanCas shipper. And you could even say a Cas stan.

Notice! How in s13 for SEVEN episodes we have a story that revolves around Dean's grief about losing Cas. Notice! How often the stories in all these seasons have a focus on their relationship. THAT is Andrew Dabb. If it weren't for him doing that, we wouldn't be able to easily say after Dean's lack of a response to Cas' confession, that Dean reciprocates.

To me, when I was (binge) watching s12 for the first time, I thought damn this is really got a lot of DeanCas. So I went to look at who was in charge, who was writing. I saw Andrew Dabb, associated him with Deancas episodes, saw all the new writers, Bobo, and then I saw that Yockey is known for same sex stories and it clicked. Dabb assembled a team to give us Destiel. THAT WAS IN SEASON 12!!!!!!!!

The amount of people saying he's homophobic flabbergast me. Open your eyes! That isn't what's going on.

Imagine making a show and trying to right all the wrongs of Supernatural. Imagine trying to write the greatest love story ever told and you have the entire season planned out for it to end off beautifully, it may possibly be your greatest achievement when it's done and then boom. someone comes in and tells you you aren't allowed to make Dean bi or make destiel endgame, after he was most probably already given the go ahead.

Sure. You could imply he's bi or into cas still in a way. Still make nice-ish ending. just give everyone what the kinda want.

Or you could scrap the last season, nothing close to a canonical bisexual Dean Winchester or Deancas endgame in site. People can be done with it be happy with the show, continue to live their lives in ignorance as to how close they were to Canon destiel.

OR you can lead everyone to the very closest you can get them to what you were aiming for and then show everyone the ugly truth and reality. Light it all on fire. Burn the show to the ground in your wake. Try your darnedest to making these people's (the people saying no) pockets suffer. Show us, the audience, what happened. Show us what this show really is.

I've seen people talk about the ending being changed during covid but I dont think that happened. I think what happened was Dabb already had this season planned out before it even started. Obviously the details were wobbly but it was all lead up to this ending. Destiel endgame, Canon Bisexual Dean, whatever it was. They were ready to write the greatest love story ever told and then someone shut it down.

Imagine the pain that must have caused them to be told no when they already said yes. They must have been so excited to give this to us.

I think someone (some producers) told him what this show is "really" about. The brothers. Can you imagine, after being told no, some kinda bullshit like this is said to you: "Why aren't you bringing it back to the brothers, Andrew? that's what the shows about. What with all this homosexual stuff, you know the audience won't like that. Not really." Imagine the original producers pushing this kind of view on you. "You know when we started it was Sam and Dean. It should end with Sam and Dean." That kinda sounds like someone huh? huh.

So why give us a nice acceptable finale, when you can take every problem Supernatural's had either up front or behind the scenes and create a finale so incredibly bad that people don't want to watch it anymore.

Someone made a good point about how Sam was originally supposed to be the main focus (this isn't to put any hate on Sam or Jared). Dean and Sam are the main characters but Sam was supposed to be the focus and for Dean to have become the focus, must have annoyed the producers because... well here we are. They wouldn't listen to Jensen. The producers liked this ending. Jensen's opinion didn't matter to them.

In some ways, if this is really what happened, it can be seen as childish from Dabb. To hurt all of us like that. Yes, he's hurting the producers, the execs, the cw. But to hurt us? Yeah it stings.

But in other ways, if this is really what happened, this is Dabb showing us the muck and gunk under the shiny surface. The hate for Misha. The hidden hate for Jensen. The underlying sexism. The underlying homophobia. The people REALLY in charge don't care about us, they just want our money. He needed to open our eyes and free us, at least free the people that he was writing for. The people he sees that care about this show.

This is the ending the powers that be wanted and its a big fuck you for a reason. I dont think this is Dabb spitting in our faces for loving this show, I think this is him trying to get revenge for us.

But from here, you can see it how u want it. If this is really what happened, I'm not in charge of your emotions, if you wanna be mad be mad if you wanna be grateful be grateful. And you don't have to believe me either I said this is speculation.

Also, as for all of the rumors like there being shots to the confession scene that we didn't see, which Jensen himself implied, I think that might have been a last ditch effort to canonized DeanCas but obviously it was cut. Like the name change was pretty clear. As for Misha possibly having shot some stuff for 20 I dont know what to tell you. If it's true I dont know where the blame would lie.

I do think however, that if all this was the case, the writers were prepared to become villians here. I mean they told us the writers were villians with Chuck right? So. Who knows what went down so they could give us such a vile ending. It could've been the producers or the writers, who truly knows. I do think tho that people we "trust" did some pretty shitty things to push the narrative in certain directions so now one would see this as the actual ending that was coming.

So again do with my SPECULATION what you will. This was in no way meant to put Dabb on a pedestal or anything. Just meant to give a bit of perspective.

(Also Jensen didn't unfollow Dabb recently he was already unfollowed for years)

[latenightdecaf]

Entry 5 - Good Weather Day

part of let the pile of good things grow series - series masterlist

Previous entry here

Yoongi x reader

Ft. nonidol!bts

Producer!yoongi, roommate!yoongi, soft!yoongi

slow burn romance, friendship, slice of life, series of drabbles/one shots,

a/n: i know it took me such a long time to update this. I even contemplated on just leaving this like this but no, i’ll have to see this till the end. Even i, myself need closure. Anyhow, to anyone who have stumbled upon this I hope you like it.

Word count: 1,700

“Hey.. you run?” he commented as soon as he saw you on your tracksuit and running shoes standing in the living room.

“Yeah… i do.” He looks at you all puzzled. As you make your way to the kitchen and gulped half a liter of water in seconds.

“You just dont get up so early in the morning, my friend. I run and I haven’t run in days and I can’t think—so I have to run.” You continue to babble and looking a far while holding your water mid air “it’s like my head’s all cloudy and the sunlight just wont stream in. And I can’t think….”

He made his infamous tight lipped smile and said, “what are you being so poetic for so early in the morning?” he drank his water and continued to gaze at you.

You let out a small laugh in your own non sense.

“I dont know either. Anyhoo, why are you up…” you paused to eye him from head to toe “and ready to go out? At 7 am in the morning…. who are you?” Not believing your eyes that this, in fact is the man you’ve been living with for months now. He’s not a morning person and you respect that about him.

“I have a schedule to meet with this new artist, for her debut and this is the only time she has and her agency said she really wanted me. So here i am.” You nodded and found an opening to tease him. “Oh, she wants you… wink wink.”

Completely ignoring you like always, he finished his glass of water and grab his keys and turned back on you.

“Arent you going to run?”

“Yeah let’s go.”

Before locking the door behind you, he asked “You sure you have everything?”

Checking your pockets to see, “Yes.”

“Cash? Phone?”

“Check, check!”

“You sure you’re didnt forget anything?”

“Yoongi please.” You irritably answered.

He smiled and locked the door to your apartment. Walking together towards the stairs when you said,

“Thanks for fixing the light bulb by the way… last week.” Gaze fixed he just nodded.

“Are you okay btw?” Surprised by the question, you didnt even realized you both are already at the ground floor and in front of his car. You looked at him puzzled.

“Yeah i’m okay, why won’t i be?” Still looking at you when he pressed on the keys for his car to open.

“Nothing. I’ll go ahead.” He said and be on his way. You waved him bye with a smile and walked away with your airpods on.

Running is the thing you do, when your mind’s all clouded and you can’t seem to figure out what’s wrong either. You ran around the block and into the nearby park. And by the end of it, you were just honestly walking and admiring the view. Thinking to yourself what a good weather day this day is.

Hoping it’ll actually be a decent day indeed.

You went home after a long meeting with a colleague about this new book she’s planning, and asked if you would consider doing the illustrations for her. Of course, you felt flattered and told her you’ll probably need some time to think about it. She respected it of course, and asked you to take your time.

You sneaked in quietly into the living room, and found a girl drinking in her coffee and watching the tv and Yoongi standing by the sofa and watching it intently with her.

Standing behind him, you tapped his shoulder gently and said, “Hi….” Smiling sheepishly.

He smiled at you and you immediately said, “I don’t want to disturb, I’ll just go to my room.”

Before you can even escape, he grabbed your wrist and said, “No, come on. I want you to meet Hyuna.”

The girl, so feminine and soft greeted you with her eye smile and friendly face. You felt almost embarrassed, he doesn’t really have to introduce you. “Hi, I work with Yoongi.” She extended her hand and you shook it embarrassingly and said, “well, i’m…” looking over to Yoongi as you paused, “I’m his roommate.”

You have no idea what are you so shy about, it’s not the first time you’ve met one of his friends. Casually at the same restaurant before, you bumped into each other and he introduced you to Jin and Hoseok. It was fun and casual, but this one felt a little different. You’ve never seen him bring a friend home before and if he did then you probably weren’t home to actually meet them unlike this time.

After the introductions and small talks about the program they were watching and the fact that you were already dying to just go to your room, that is unfortunately across the hall. You opened your mouth to say something, only to close it again. And then after a second you said, “I better get going—to my room.” You wave goodbye to Hyuna, “It’s nice meeting you, Hyuna.”

And before you can move again.

“Why don’t you have dinner with us? I’m cooking.” Yoongi suddenly offered.

‘Well that sounds like a date,’ you thought to yourself. You immediately declined and in sudden panic you said, “No, no, no, no… I don’t want to interrupt. And I… I actually have plans, dinner—with Haneul today. So yeah—I better go get changed.” You hurriedly walked to your room before Yoongi can say anything again.

And as soon you got into your room, you sighed the greatest relief. And wondered why in the world would Yoongi even invite you just to be polite?! It already feels like a date and there seemed like something going on between the two of them. You dont like being caught in the middle of anything that’s why you have developed the habit of lying fast just to get yourself out of situations you don’t like.

And this one is just one of those moments, obviously. So no, you don’t have dinner plans with Haneul. Your original plan for tonight is to actually sleep, but you already said that you’d be out and apparently changing clothes also so that you have to do. With a heavy heart, you’ve changed your clothes after an hour of thinking more ways that you could probably get out of this, and despite that you left the room in defeat.

You went to see both of them in the kitchen, looking at Yoongi’s back as he cooks and her telling him some stories and holding a beer beside him.

‘Aww they already looked like a couple.’ You thought to yourself.

You stopped in the kitchen and quickly told them you’d be going ahead.

And ahead you go, out of the apartment and the sun has just set and you feel really tired after the day you just had. You do have your car keys with you but you decided not to go far instead. So you walked, just a couple of blocks away—your favorite deli just opened a new restaurant beside it and you’ve been meaning to try their food so you thought maybe today’s the day.

You went inside the restaurant, cozy and thankfully enough not that crowded still. You sat by the window, brought out your notebook and ordered yourself a bottle of wine and some oysters. There’s nothing to celebrate but wine is always a good idea. ‘Maybe you can celebrate Yoongi’s love life,’ you thought and that kind of made you smile.

Dinner’s done and as you were just finishing your bottle of wine, and wondering whether to get another one. You thought you saw someone familiar outside, the street’s quite small and the street light’s just adequate. You’re not sure.

You saw this guy, has a black cap on and his back facing you—180 cm in height so familiar and yet so different. He’s with a girl. He opened the door to the passenger’s side of his car, hand covering her head lightly as he guides her inside, gentlemanly. He hurriedly went to the driver’s seat and then the car left.

You laughed to yourself, sipping in your last wine.

‘It can’t be Joon, he doesn’t drive.’ You shake your head to shake those crazy thoughts away and finished your meal and got your bill.

After dinner you stopped by the deli to get some of your favourite sausages and some cheese. Eventually buying ice cream as well to topped off your day. Walked around the neighbourhood for a couple more times before eventually walking back to your place. Thinking to yourself, that you’ve probably given them enough time to themselves and by this time you can just eventually say, ‘It’s late, i’ll probably just turn in’ in case—they would politely ask you for anything.

Bag of groceries in your wrists, hand inside the pocket of your hoodie and ice cream on the other. You went inside your apartment only to find it quiet and empty. Yoongi with his glasses on just sitting in the sofa watching tv.

“Hi” You raised your hands with ice cream to greet him and eventually sat on the sofa.

“What happened to your… date?” Eyes fixed on the tv and still eating your ice cream as you asked.

“It’s not a date.” Yoongi replied

‘Yeah right’ you thought. But you just eventually shrugged your shoulders as a reply.

“Do you have more of that?” Yoongi asked.

Eyes still fixed on the tv, you reached for the other ice cream in your bag and give it to him without even looking.

“I know you like this flavor.”

“It’s okay. I just eat it because you keep buying them.” You turned your head towards him with a confused look.

“Then what do you like then?”

“Nothing in particular, Vanilla’s fine.” Opening up his own ice cream and eyes still fixed at the tv.

You turned your head back, nodding.

You both sat in silence eating some cookies and cream ice cream while watching Batman Begins.

mood board sr: x x

[kodzuken-chan]

Henloooo author-chwan! It's me again :D I really love how you made the monster trio + law about the s/o having sleeping problems bc of nightmares! At first I wasn't really expecting for my request to be done since I requested it not knowing if your ask box is open or if you're full of requests at the moment, but I was surlrised when I received a notification that author-chwan has answered my ask! I was doing school stuff when I received the notification, and I did pause my work just to read it immediately and you never fail to make me smile! So here I am again wanting to request something to u author-chwan 👉👈

If author-chwan can possibly make an angst for monster trio+law reacting to s/o going back to their ships drunk after a hurtful argument where their s/o refuses their cuddles and apologies making the guys tear up with the sudden coldness of their s/o thinking that their s/o might call sooner or later their break up. It is up to you author-chwan whether you make it a mini mini scenario or hc's either way will do! Thankyou for being amazing and wonderful! Keep safe and have a great day ahead! I wuv u so much 💞 oh, and drink your water to stay hydrated!

A/N: omg hello dear~ its so nice to see you again in my ask box, I'm glad that you liked your previous request and i love you too (≧▽≦)

Btw your request reminded me of One Direction's " Nobody compares", idk why 😂

In terms of my ask box, it will always be open and you can request whenever you want, I'm writing the requests now immediately bcs I'm on my college mid term vacation, so I'm using my free time writing the requests, but wheny new Semster begins, I might take a longer time to write them but i will sure do bcs it helps me to avoid stress and pressure 🙈

Here you go,I made them as Headcanons, i haven't written about drunk characters before so i hope this is good and i hope you enjoy~^^

------------------

The Monster Trio + Law with an S/O who gets drunk after a hurtful argument Headcanons

-----------------

Luffy:

Okay so you and Luffy rarely fought with each other and if you did

It was always on sth really silly and eventually you end up forgetting about that tiny argument

But this time، The quarrel was intense between the two of you

To the point that you have left the ship crying and he didn't come after you

You stopped by one of that island's bars and end up drinking more than you should

Its getting late and you still didn't come back

Luffy is now feeling guilty and worried bcs he didn't go after you

He doesn't like it when you two fight and neither you do

He decided to wait on the deck, and that's when he spotted you

You were staggering left and right

He immediately came to you and tried to carry you bcs you don't seem to be alright

But you pushed him away

" Don't... Don't touch me ..L...Luffy" you said as your eyes streams with tears

" (Y/N)...I'm sorry okay? Its my fault so let me carry you, you're totally drunk" he said as he tried to carry you once again

"Nooo!" You pushed him once again and barely ran towards your room smacking the door

Boy this little cutie pie thought that you didn't love him any more

He was depressed the whole night eating more than he should

The next morning you woke up, recalling what happened yesterday

Oh damnit did you push your Luffy yesterday when he was trying to apologize?

Tho your head was heavy, but you jumped out of your bed looking for your poor boyfriend

" Oh damnit (Y/N) are you carzy, oh god please Luffy don't get mad nor Sad at me" you said talking to yourself

You searched until you found him sitting in the kitchen eating with that pout on his face

You approched him calling his name

He looked at you as if he saw a ghost

"Luffy....I'm sorry for our fight and what I did to you yesterday...*sniff* i didnt mean it" you began to cry

He stood up and pulled you into a tight hug

" No no... I'm sorry bcs i made you cry, i thought that you would leave me" he said with crack tone

" No no Why would i leave you...I love you so much baka senchou" you cried as you snuggled into his chest.

Ever since that day, you never fought again

Zoro:

You were used to Zoro's blunt attitude, bcs he's Zoro

You and Zoro never fought seriously before

Those arguments that happened back then were not more than Zoro trying to piss you off as he defines it as teasing

And today wasn't especially a good day bcs this time your quarrel was quite intense

Zoro wasn't helping at all with his bluntness, and you were done with it

You walked away of him down to the island, and you weren't sure if he got a glimpse of your teary eyes

You went to one of the bars there and began to drink

Honestly you were good at it and rarely got drunk thanks to your boyfriend

But this time you were so angry and sad, you didn't know anymore how to feel

You were totally drunk now as you reached Sunny

Zoro noticed you staggering as you almost tripped over yourself

He reacted quickly and caught you before you smashed your face in the ground

He was shocked at your sight, and now he feels guilty, bcs he made his girlfriend who rarely gets drunk, Drunked

You raised your head trying to recognize who caught you when you realized its Zoro

" Leave me... I don't need your help, don't try to be kind to me after what you said" you sobbed

His heart clenched and he let you go

You went to the girls room, and he scratched the nape of his neck , "Kuso....she's totally mad...."

He honestly doesn't like this situation, Ugh its nerve wracking he thought

He sat on the bench and drank his bottle of sake trying to not get negative thoughts about you leaving him bcs of his bluntness

This when you walked to him silently sobbing, " Zoro...are you mad....? *sniff*, i said a crule thing to you..*sniff*.." as you wrapped your arms around his abdomen from the back

Let's say your cry was his weakness, so yes he tensed and turned to face your swollen eyes

He cupped your cheeks and kissed them

"I deserve it, I was mean to you...I'm ..I'm sorry" he suttered as he avoided your gaze

You muffled a giggle and hugged him tightly

From that time he was careful not to hurt your feelings again, bcs he doesn't want to see you crying again.

Sanji:

So in Sanji's case, you Literally never argued with each other Never

He thinks arguments just increase the problem and its a waste of energy

So talking about it calmly is the best option for both sides and you totally agree with that

Bcs that's what the two of you did every time there is a misunderstanding which rarely happened

But this time, this argument was calm yet intense, bcs your voices raised on each other

You were now just staring at each other's eyes for 10 minutes straight

You were hurt, you didn't like how its going, you don't want to argue with him like that

Soon your eyes teared up, and then you immediately ran out of the room

He was taken back at the sight of your tears and he ran after you, "(Y/N)~chan!"

When he came out of the room you were already gone, he searched and didn't find you.

Later, he was impatiently waiting , when his eyes got a glimpse of you slightly sawying back and forth

He acknowledged that you were drunk looking at how red your cheek was

You said nothing but entered your shared bedroom and threw yourself on the bed

He came closer without saying anything and slipped right next you

He slowly wrapped his arms around in an attempt to cuddle you as an apology

You unintentionally glared at him, pushing him away

" ... ..Sanji-kun... please leave.... I don't want to be with now" You hardly said when you buried your teary eyes in the pillow

He gulped at your sentence as the colors drained from his face.

He gently left your side and went to the kitchen and man...he was a mess

He was ruffling his hair angry at himself for making you cry and drunk to this point.

It was sleepless night for the two of you.

Your eyes opened at 3:30 am, you glanced at the spot next to you and he wasn't there

The rejection of his apology cuddles by you popped up in your head, and you gasped

You immediately ran to the kitchen, sure that he was there

When you Slightly opened the door he was burying his head in his arms on the table

Tears rolled over your cheeks at the sight, you blamed yourself for doing that to him

You sat next to him and stroked his hair, "*sniff* ....I'm sorry....Sanji-kun please...*sniff* don't hate me" you silently muttered aa you sobbed

He raised his head looking at you with wide eyes and pulled you into a deep kiss

" I'm the one who should apologize (Y/N)~chan, i dared and raised my voice at you, I'm really sorry"

You snuggled into each other and promised that you'd never argue again

Law:

Similar to Sanji, You and Law didn't get into quarrels and arguments with each other

Basically bcs you both don't have the time to do so

He spends most of his time in the office either working or studying

And you'd be busy doing your personal work or your hobbies

But that day, Polar Tang docked on an island and everyone left to explore the island except for you, Law and Bepo

Neither of you knew what happened buy yoh found yourself arguing and it got intense each minute

The reason was trivial but you didn't know where did it went wrong to get to this point

So now you're trying as hard as you can to keep your tears inside your eyes

And headed outside walking straight to the island when you burst in the middle of the way

Then you found a convince store, you went inside and bought bottles of sake and started drinking it

You were totally aware of how bad is the idea, bcs you're bad at drinking

And here you are, going back to Polar Tang wobbling about to pass out any second

Law spotted you and came immediately trying to take you inside before you hurt yourself

He placed his arms around your shoulders but you coldly rejected his help with an icy stare

You walked further and then lost your conscious, of course Bepo was there and he caught you

Bepo took you inside and he stayed beside you to give you some water when you wake up

Law went back to his office, he was angry, not at you but at himself, thinking that you might leave him after what happened

He usually controls his anger, but this time he couldn't

Things were broken and thrown inside his office and the sound was heared everywhere

10 minutes later you woke up and now conscious after drinking some water

You asked Bepo about what happened and he explained

Law was that type who is hard to please if he got sad and that brought fear to your heart that he might end the things between the two of you after what happened

Running to Law's office, you slowly opened the door to find everything thrown around the room, it was a clear mess

Your tears rolled over your cheeks at his sight as you stood in your place

"Law.....Please don't.. don't hate me..I'm sorry *sniff*... please don't be angry, I love you so much..so...so don't leave-" you sobbed like a lost child

Law jumped over you and pulled you in a tight hug stroking your hair

"Baka....why would i leave you, I love you so much...I'm sorry for earlier", he said as he placed a gentle kiss on your lips

Later, he cuddled you throughout the night and promised you that this won't happen again.

[bakugous-abs]

What about Todoroki, Deku, Bakugo, Denki, and Hawks having to save their gf when they got kidnapped, and they just sit there holding their gf, telling her it’s going to be ok, since she went through endless hours of torture, some tears be shedded

I’m gonna be doing headcanons for these if that’s alright!! It’s easier to avoid repetition this way ♡ - Bomb

.

.

.

Bakugou

- God where do i begin with the emotional turmoil and his pride clashing

- He wants to hug them so bad, but he doesn't want to be seen as weak in front of the others

- He doesn't want them to know you're a liability

- Even if they were all heroes

- And if it wasn't for Kirishima pulling everyone else away from you besides one or two paramedics, he probably wouldn't have touched you at all until you got a hospital room

- If he touched you he didn't know if he could let go again

- As soon as everyone left he took off his gauntlets and held you as tightly and as gently as he could

- You seemed unresponsive to this gesture, until he heard you sniffle a few moments later and wrap your arms weakly around him, fingers trying to grasp at his costume

- He also cried, telling you "it's gonna be okay, you hear me? you're going to be okay, dammit." into your shoulder, slightly tightening his grip on you with every time he said it

- It was very Bakugouish and that simple fact alone made you feel ten times better than before

- Bakugou wouldn't let you out of his sight for even two seconds after that, always having a hand touching you

- Nearly threw hands with the hospital staff when they took you into a separate room to check for any other injuries

Deku

- This man would hesitate a little bit, shaking as he approached you with hands barely grazing your skin as he asked you if you were okay

- The moment you responded, whether that be a nod or a verbal answer, his eyes would tear up and he'd bring you so close you wouldn't be able to tell who was who

- He was very considerate of your scars and open wounds, not going too tight where they were most sore

- He was the first to start crying, you followed suite moments later, arms wrapping tightly around his neck

- "i-im so sorry yn. You're okay now though, right? Im here. Of course you are. The heroes are here. You're gonna be okay now-"

- That continued on for another 15 minutes and you would be annoyed under any other circumstances but right now,,, you needed it

- Didn't fight with paramedics when they had to take you to a separate room but was VERY nervous the whole time you were split

Todoroki

- He,,,, he didn't know what to do if im being completely honest

- He has such a hard time describing his emotions, even through actions. He's not deaf to them, just can't articulate them correctly

- Hes angry, hes happy, hes sad, hes relieved, constant opposites that he didnt know how to express

- So when he finally made it to you where you sat on the gurney in the back of an ambulance, all he could think to do was put his forehead against yours and cry

- You didn't question it as you began to cry too, pushing into him a little bit to let him know you were there, grabbing his hand ever so slightly which he accepted and squeezed your fingers

- "Yn I'm,,, I dont know what to say,,, I love you so much,,," 

- You laughed a little at that, but returned the I love you with a kiss

- Todoroki,,,,, this man,,,,,,,,, he froze a few paramedics when they tried to separate you not gonna lie

- Was then almost forced out of the hospital when the head doctor just gave him the go ahead to be with you to save the rest of his staff from becoming popsicles

Denki

- He,,, god this man loves you so much and hes not gonna let you forget it

- The moment he saw you he ran towards you, and almost tackled you to the ground out of pure relief

- The crashing of your bodies alerting some staff but he Did Not Care and Would Not let you go

- "I love you!! I love you so much yn youre so fucking strong for putting up with that!! I love you" 

- You're honestly not sure who cried more you or him

- Probably him

- After the initial shock he would bounce back, asking if you were okay and checked you up and down as if he didn't slam his body into yours a few minutes ago

- It was sweet though, you loved him

- Completely inseparable, you two

- Except for when the staff told him to leave for a few while they got you set up in your room where he exited like a kicked puppy with his tail between his legs

Hawks

- Birdman is like a combination between Deku and Kaminari

- Super hesitant yet so eager to put his hands on you

- The moment you give him the go ahead to wrap his arms around you youre trapped in his arms and caged in his wings

- Almost like he was protecting you for when he couldn't

- "Jesus fucking Christ yn you scared me half to shit. I love you so much baby bird please don't leave me like that again."

- You wrapped your arms around him and promised him you wouldn't, though you knew that promise would be quickly broken when you would have to be separated for the paramedics to do their job and when he got sent on another hero mission

- When the hospital staff actually DID try and take you from him,,, it was a lot similar to the Todoroki situation and he was just eventually allowed to stay by your side 

- After they had fixed you up the reality of what happened sunk in and you began to bawl your eyes out, shaking and cold

- He comforted you the whole time, his own tears shedding as he felt every shake and jolt of your body against his

[mrs-amber]

Oopps! I just realized you are only using the 3 part.. Im sorry i didnt see it before 🤦‍♂️ so maybe instead of that one this one 42) “Are you flirting with me?” I loveee Laurent flirting first with Damen but as i said in my other ask please do whatever you like best 💘💘

Hey, love! There's no problem at all!! I loved both of them! I hope you like what I did with this one 🙈

This prompt was taken from this list, where you can find other prompts and the ones that were already filled and answered. Let me know if you liked it or if you want another one!

42. “Are you flirting with me?”

When it happened, Damen didn't even understand what was going on. It couldn't be right, could it? So he had to ask.

"Are you flirting with me?"

Laurent was just a teenager back then, somewhere around 13 or 14 years old. Damen had just met him, when he went to their house because of Auguste, a new boy that had moved to the city with his family and was now in Damen's class. They became fast friends, and that's how he found himself in their living room, talking to his younger brother, who was now flushed in the cutest red he had ever seen.

He wasn't being subtle about flirting, you see, and that's why Damen was so dumbfounded when the first thought that it could be for real crossed his mind.

And when he asked and Laurent's whole body changed colors, he was even more surprised. But then Laurent just fled away and he didn't see the boy anymore.

The thought of a tiny young Laurent flirting with him so shamelessly entertained Damen's thoughts for years, and he always thought it was funny to think about it.

Damen and Auguste graduated in the following year, leaving Laurent behind to go through the end of school and high school on his own, and whenever Damen found himself back in the deVere's home, the youngest brother wasn't around to be seen.

Until he was. And Damen couldn't bring himself to think it was funny anymore.

And that was years and years later, Laurent was already grown and in the last year of high school himself. Damen was sitting in their living room couch with Auguste, they were watching a football game and very absorbed in it when Laurent arrived home.

Damen didn't even bother looking back, assuming it was Auguste's parents since he never got to see Laurent again.

"Hey, Lau! How are you?" Auguste had turned and was looking at his brother.

Damen turned too.

And he was not ready for the sight he found in front of him.

Laurent's short hair fell a little in front of his face, and he tried to blow it away, he had his cheeks blushed from the cold outside, a stark contrast with the blue of his eyes and scarf and he was taking out layer after layer of coats and sweaters and then the blue scarf, ending up with just a white thin shirt that showed too much skin from his neck and chest and arms. Last of all he took out his shoes and approached to greet them.

And Damen couldn't look anywhere else, see nobody else and hear nothing else but the man coming closer and closer and the blood pumping inside his ears, he could feel the heat rising to his own cheeks in a way he wasn't used to and had no way to control.

He had to put up with Auguste endlessly teasing after that, but he couldn't forget Laurent anymore. Not that he had ever, but now it was for a completely different reason.

And after that day, he found himself changing clothes, looking at the mirror and searching for a set of blond hair and blue eyes everywhere he went.

Until he found him again.

It was months later, enough time for Damen to have gone almost mad with want and Nik almost mad with him about it. Laurent had already graduated, which meant he would be probably be going to college or doing something else entirely, Damen had no way of knowing.

Damen was at a club with Nikandros and Auguste, both of them sitting in a table at the end of the room, and Damen was at the bar to order them drinks.

He couldn't tell which force of nature made him turn his head at the moment, the music was very loud and people were shouting to each other in order to communicate, but he turned his head and saw as the front door of the club opened and Laurent came in. Of course Damen couldn't look anywhere else after he put his eyes on the only man he had been thinking about for months now. And then Laurent looked at him. And started to walk in his direction.

He felt his smile broaden with every step the blond took, until he reached him.

"Hello, Laurent."

"Hello, Damianos." Laurent was standing just in front of him, looking up straight into his eyes, their bodies inches apart.

"Can I buy you a drink?" asked Damen.

"That depends, are you flirting with me?"

Damen almost choked on his own spit, what the hell was happening? He couldn't decide if Laurent sounded like he was teasing him, remembering the only thing he had ever said to him before that day, or if he was somehow serious.

Laurent smirked, his gaze never flickering from Damen's.

And damn Damen if he wouldn't take this chance, no matter what it meant.

"Yes," was the only word he managed to say, but he took a step ahead, closing the inches that were left between their bodies, feeling Laurent's warmth against his chest.

At that, Laurent looked away, blushing that same red he had when he was little, and that was all Damen had been dreaming about.

Laurent took a step towards the bar and called for the bartender, "I'll want a margarita." He said, "it's on him" and turned to smile at Damen.

And that was all the encouragement Damen needed, all the answer he would get, because now that Laurent let him, he would flirt, and he would never let Laurent go away again, he would stay close, as close as he could, until the day Laurent sent him away.

[papers4me]

Fruits Basket,Se03, Ep 9 (part 1)

“ppl & feelings can’t be bound down”~

What an ep for my girl tohru! She completed her growth thanks to kyo’s rejection. really, It was so hard, cruel, understandable but above all so necessary for her to reach a logical realistic conclusion that “I can love/want things from the bottom of my heart, but at the end I can’t force or bound them to me, I won’t regret loving/wanting them, but I’ll move forward regardless, no more standing still”.

-The fear of being alone:

Aren’t we all? We’re scared to face the word after breaking bonds, changing, not getting what we want, having to start over. Such feelings run deeper into us all. Both tohru & akito were scared to face the word without the old comfortable bond that they got used to:

Tohru realized today, that she cant keep talking to a cold photo, can’t live according to her mom’s expectations, to fulfill her mom’s wishes, can’t narrate her daily life to her mom & fill her life with other ppl’s own issues to distract her self from facing her own loneliness & from looking deeper into what should she do with her life. As she fell in love with kyo, tohru started talking to him! forgetting to inform her mom abt her life’s details, thinking abt what will she do “after graduation?”. As kyo asked in se02, ep2. Graduating highschool is ur mom’s wish, What would u wanna do after?” Tohru didnt have a response of “an after”cuz her mom wasnt there to tell her! Tohru has to choose “the after” herself!!!! “The after” was being with kyo & starting life together! figuring what to do next together! She no longer alone! she found her most precious person!

Except: he cant be with her. Again tohru is scared. What to do now! she wanted a bond but is forced to leave it. Loving kyo was stage 1 to be free from her grief. Moving forward without kyo is stage 2 to learn not to repeat the painful journey again! She didnt let go of her mom & kyo easily. It was hard, scary but she must do it. You must respect their wishes & move on. As scared as she is, there will be sadness & happiness ahead.

Akito realized she cant keep an empty box, cant keep fulfilling her dad’s wishes to “be loved & special” cant bound the zodiacs to her for good. They may love her or not, it doesn't matter, if they wish to leave for whatever reason, she cant force them to stay.

Except now that the zodiacs are leaving, what does she have to live for? who will be with her? she isnt good with strangers? she never met anyone who wasnt forced to obey her & be grateful for her. Strangers cant be forced to love her! what will she do now? stretch you hand for a greeting. Tohru told her, make a friend, they might refuse you, but hey might accept u too, I’ll make it easy, Hi, I;m tohru, whats ur name?

The power of true love: ( reality vs fiction)

In fairy tales, the princess fix the prince. the prince save the princess. The prince kiss the princess, she wakes up & they be happy ever after. Except real life has no prince & princess, You cant always be saved, you cant always save others, pure intense true love cant always be the answer!

Yuki was first when tohru needed physical saving. he saved her twice! Yuki’s nickname in school ”the prince”. Yuki is always cool, thoughtful & kind. Yuki always knew what to say & do! he deserves tohru’s romantic love more than kyo, right? But “ppl & feelings can’t be bound down”~ . Yuki didn't feel this way towards tohru, granted no one (excepts kakeru) knows the reason why he loves her fondly (she’s his mom figure). The official” prince isnt the one for her. Real life isn’t a fairy tale. Yuki has someone who sees he isn’t cool, perfect or a prince “ granted no one knows abt machi, yet! ) XD

In tohru monologue: she didnt think abt saving, that's not why she loves kyo. She stated normal, silly, mundane things! a shy smile, awkward kindness & the likes. Stuff ppl love abt each other in real life. You dont say, I love my husband cuz he saved me from a burning building in the 7th floor! lol. But fiction is so full of this. Princes saving princesses.

Tohru didnt fix kyo, too! as much as her love helped him greatly to find hope, the best writing choice is that tohru’s love also brought despair to kyo! To him, she’s the symbol of hope, peace & comfort! she’s also, the symbol of despair, torment & unease! EPIC! The kyo who’s stuck in the past cant be with her, the kyo who will move beyond trauma, abuse & broken soul will be with her. The duality is all on kyo’s shoulder: what will he choose? Can he choose in his state now?

In fairy tales the princess wakes up after the kiss. In real life, we don't. Tohru didn’t. Regardless if she fainted during or after the kiss. The kiss fixed nothing. Kyo’s despair in seeing near-dead tohru in a not-so-subtle mimic to his nightmare, has manifested itself into the sweetest kiss upon seeing her conscious & talking. Kyo isnt good with words, his actions are his words. When he’s scared, sad, in trauma: running away. when he’s  fond of her, grateful for her existence: head knock, head pats, hand holding & a kiss. Still the kiss fixed nothing. Kyo is still traumatized more than ever now. Tohru still feels rejected “even if I’m not with you, plz live”.

Talking fixes everything. It didn’t here, kyo & tohru talked & showed their most vulnerable side to the other, but still didn’t meet half ways, regardless of all the love. That’s cuz they keep missing each other’s best timing. Kyo is stuck in the past while tohru has moved forward. even if in her mind she’s the one who stood & he moved. this shows they aren’t on the same wave yet. Before meeting each other again, kyo must learn from his mistake like tohru did. He must face his ultimate demon: his dad. The one who created the current broken kyo.

Rebelling against parents: ( sign of growth & freedom of choice):

Rebelling against parents  is a sign of a desire to choose one’s path, decide one’s own future. Away to express an oppressed desire.

Yuki rebelled against his mom in se02. he told her I’m not going to the college you chose. I’ll chose my path. I’m not staying away from Ayame. My bro is good in my book. I chose who I want to be with. He told her what he needed, turned his back & moved forward.

Tohru rebelled against her mom today. told her I’m not wasting myself doing only what you I think you’ll approve off. You might bot forhet kyo, thats ur choice, But I DO. I love him even if you might not approve of him, Even if he rejected me, my feelings wont change, but I’ll move forward from the grief & pain. mother. She told her what he needed, turned his back & moved forward.

Kyo WILL rebelled against his disgusting dad. He MUST. It is his turn now. He’ll tell him I’m not wasting myself being locked in a cage. I have a future! I’m not a monster. I am LOVED! I might not 100% sure why I’m loved, but the truth cant be hidden. I have ppl who love me! cheer for me! I want to live! enough of death! mom & kyoko died, tohru nearly did, but I’m not gonna die! I’m not killing ME! I’‘ll do what MOM didnt do! I’ll do what YOU couldn't do! I’ll live! He’ll tell him what he needed, turned his back & moved forward.  I cant wait! I’m in tears just thinking abt it! Kyo was punished enough! time for happiness!

Side Notes:

While I’m impressed with tohru’s growth, as they did her justice in this ep, this doesn’t erase that the buildup for tohru’s own journey & trauma was mediocre. There is a reason ppl commented ” omg tohru, you can love your mom AND kyo!. ” Grief is illogical, long process & it sucks that we weren’t allowed to experience tohru’s grief & her mom’s role in tohru’s abandonment issues. Huge lost opportunity that a good conclusion ep cant erase! but like tohru, I’m moving on ~

The path of growth for kyo will start by rejecting the demon: his dad. No. other. option. Hold abusers accountable for their crimes. Stop their madness. Tell them off.

We know kyo is baka! that’s his trade mark, the endearing baka! a lot of characters in the show think so! I love it, but I’m craving baka-yuki! XD! really, yuki is cool, level-headed & smart, but let him be baka too! this only shows up in tiny microscopic doses, but they’re my fave doses of yuki! it humanizes the “perfect prince”, the “gifted high status rat”! Thus him not seeing kyo running the other side, is my fave look on him! XD.

I appreciate that kyo & yuki put their differences aside when they’re with tohru. You cant tell yuki is hella pissed off with kyo, but he restrained himself. His gaze while full of anger is also full of sympathy as he heard/saw kyo’s panic upon the thought of loosing tohru. He understand they both only mean the best for each other, but also tried they both keep missing each other & not meeting half way! Also, yuki being the only one in the hospital is realistic & endearing. No need for them all to be there & yuki lives with her & is so close to her.

kyo not being the hospital is fantastic! thank you writer-San! why would kyo go to the hospital after thinking his nightmare came true? kyoko /his mom warned him, you’ll hurt another person.. he did.. he didn't cause her fall... but caused her sadness & hurt.

Momiji’s reprimanding gaze is my fave look on him! Also, the best response to what akito did. Akito isnt used to such judgemental gaze. Kureno grabbed her cheeks, gently told her you shouldn't do that, the old maid told her you are right, Dr. Hatori erased her mistakes from ppl heads & bodies, shigure being either cold or kissing her ass, coxing her to yet torment another zodiac in his grand scheme to break the curse as happened in the beach arc.

You bet hana & arisa will be there next ep! Arisa will meet kureno & akito for sure. To path the way for their romance as seen in the ED.

Shigure’s “remorse” is a whole can of worms. Playing with ppl’s hearts & feelings to gain someone’s affection is no laughing matter. Each time blood is shed, he contributed somehow. he didnt force anyone to hurt the other, but he played with matches & never got hurt.

Shigure must be glad akito stabbed kureno. Not cuz he’s sadistic or bad person. He isn’t, but cuz akito stabbing kureno is akito cutting her bond with him. Go shigure, your girl removed her lover with blood. Kureno is punished for sleeping with ur girl by blood! so, when is ur punishment for sleeping with ur lover’s mom? none? ok.

The animation is good. They didnt villinize akito by drawing extra manic features like se02. Kyo’s broken & tormented face once again epicly drawn. However, akito’s slaps on tohru’s face were comedic, unnecessary & such bad taste! Stop using violence for extra drama, furuba!

Also, tohru, I love you, I understand you are broken but charging at a person, who has a history of violence & physical abuse & holding a knife, is stupid. No other description. I’m glad she didnt accidentally kill you in her initial rage.

Everything akito’s redemption, kureno & shigure are part 2 in my review.

[hayleygray08]

You are my home.

Introduction: this is my first writing on here. Bare with me.

Summary: you are a new member of the team after tony finds you in a hydra raid. You are shy, reserved, and not very talkative at first until you realize the team is not going to hurt you. Once comfortable you show them your powers and fall for a certain super soldier, again.

I used google translate for words in Russian, so if the words are wrong. I apologize.

In my writing, no one is dead.

Pairing: bucky x reader, everyone else is platonic.

Genre: fluff, anguish, mentions of torture, blood.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am crouched in the conner,on the floor of my cell waiting for the guards to come get me. My daily training. More like torture.

They make me train as hard as I can and if they think I am slaking, I get a few thousand jolts of electricity shot through my body. Or even a few punches.

Yesterday was one of the worst days so far, that I can remember. I was getting random images flash inside my head, almost from a past life from what I saw, which made me loose focus quite a bit. In return the men who watch me train were heavy with the electricity jolts and even harder punches, anywhere they could land on my body. So, I was not looking forward to today's training.

I don't have a clock or windows in my cell but I knew every time they would come to get me. Like my body knew the exact moment every day. So when that time came and I was still in my cell I was growing a little worry. They are never late, sometimes early, but never late. Just then a siren rang out and the lights dimmed then went red. Was that the alarm for an intruder? How is that possible?

As a million thoughts ran through my head at what could possibly cause the alarm to go off. A very vivid picture or memory came to me and played on repeat. It looked to be the 40's, on a dock or a pier, I was laughing and looking out at the water. There were two guys with me. One was small, blonde hair, blue eyes, and had a small smile on his face. The second was bigger then the first, had brown hair, bright blue eyes, and laughing with me. Why do they look familiar? Why do I have two names on the tip of my tongue? Who are they? Just as I was about to say those names my cell door was blown off and there was a cloud of dust.

As the dust settles and I can properly see, there is a man in a red and gold suit of metal. He walks towards me as he says "Cap we got someone here. She looks no older then 24, covered in bruises, and looks terrified.""Yes, I'll make sure to get her out.""No, I can't tell if she is dangerous." He sighs and crouches down so he can look me in the eyes.

"Hi, I am Tony Stark, and I am going to take you away from here." Tony says and offers me a hand. I take it cautiously and follow him out the door and eventually outside.

Once we made it outside I take a deep breath. It felt so good to get clean air. I don't even remember the last time I was outside. Must have been years. I had to shield my eyes, it was so bright out. I didnt notice more people joining us. I was to busy looking at my hands and arms. Was I always this pale? I look up at the guy who took me away, Tony, and then darkness.

Tony catches me before I could hit the floor and runs into the jet. He lays be on a table and Bruce starts an examination. Nobody dared bother him. Nat hands Tony a flash drive and sits back down with the others.

While I was unconscious and now in the medbay at the compound, I was getting more images. Some are to fast to register what it was and some stayed a good while showing me a life I do not remember, but wish I did. Also things I did, hurting people, a chair, and training. It was all to much. To much pain, suffering, lose. I could feel myself have a panic attack. Which alerted everyone.

I jolted up into a sitting position clenching my chest and taking big gasps of air. My heart monitor going off like crazy. I looked around frantically, not recognizing where I was. I tried to rip out the Iv's but a pinching sensation in my shoulder makes me stop. I look up and see a women, before I am unconscious again.

Meanwhile in the common area Tony, Steve, Natasha, Wanda, Sam, Clint, Vision, Bucky, Bruce, Thor, Loki, Scott, and Peter all sat around looking at my file.

"Her name is y/n, y/ln. She was born in 1918, lived in Brooklyn, New York. Was taken by Hydra in 1946 while she was working on a S.H.I.E.L.D mission. Hasn't been seen since. Until about 2001 when she was spotted riding a motorcycle from a crime scene. Looked to be an assassination. Then again in 2003, 2005, 2007, 2012 and the last time in 2014. So the last time was 7 years ago. It shows she was trained like the winter soldier, but never met one another. But her powers got out of control and they have been training her to keep them in control since 2014. She has assassinated 6 men, 4 women, 2 children, and 1 hydra agent in a training gone wrong on that one." Tony reads outloud to everyone.

Steve and Bucky look at each other with a look in their eyes, as if they can't believe it. Then Tony brings up a picture of me for the group to see. Everyone gasps as a few photos show up. One is me, Steve, and Bucky at Coney Island. Then one of me and Bucky smiling at each other. Then there is one of me and Peggy Carter. Once all pictures are shown, all eyes are on Steve and Bucky.

"You know her?" Asked Natasha. Everyone silently asking the same thing.

"Yes, we know her. She was our friend. She grew up with us. She was our best friend. And a little more to Bucky." Steve answers quietly, looking at Bucky. It has been 78 years since he has seen her.

As they tell the others about me and what they remember, I am waking up again at the medbay. This time more calm. The nurses and doctors where asking me questions but I wouldn't answer them. They could tell they were not going to get anywhere with me, they called Tony and Bruce. I still would not talk to them.

How could I trust them? I don't even know them. For all I know they could be Hydra as well. With all these images popping up I don't even know what to believe anymore. Both men were throwing question after question at me. I didnt know how to answer. Or if I even should. Once they realized they were not going to get anywhere they left.

By the time I got the okay from the doctors, I was put inside a cell. Something I am all to familiar with. But this one was clean, had a comfortable bed, running water, and was warm. All the walls were glass and I could see people standing around watching me. Two I kinda recognized due to the images that I get. Each one would ask a question, each time I just stared ahead.

"We want to help you." A women with red and blonde hair spoke up after a few minutes of silence. I laughed.

"You want to help me? You don't even know me. How can you help me?" I responded quietly.

"Wanda has some powers and is able to look inside your head. Put the pieces together for you. Help you remember." The same women responded looking at another women with red hhai. I am guessing is Wanda.

"We read your file, y/n, let us help you remember the things they have taken from you." Tony says as he walks around. I don't respond, just look at everyone.

They gave up after 3 hours of silence from me and them asking questions. They leave me alone until a few days later. For those days they would bring me food, check to see if I am okay, then leave. It was Wanda, Tony, Bruce, and Steve that came a few days later. I watch them as they open the door to my cell and take a seat on a bench.

"If you are okay with this, we would like to try something. It does involve bringing back everything Hydra took from you. It might be painfull. But we think you should have the choice in remembering your life."Tony speaks up after a few minutes of silence.

Do I trust these people to try and help me? Do I even want the help? To remember all the pain I have caused and I life I will never get back.

I look at the four people in front of me and when I looked at the blonde man named Steve a memory came to me. It was just us two in a tent that looked to be on a base of some sort. He was the way he is now bigger then the other one I have seen. As if he grew or got on steroids. He was telling me about someone but it was fuzzy but I had this feeling of sadness.

I take a big breath in and look at them. "What do I have to lose? Not like I am going anywhere anytime soon." I tell them as I look at my hands.

I didnt see Tony nod at the door but did hear it open. I look up to see a young girl, with a different wardrobe then the others. She smiles kindly at me as she sits next to Wanda.

"Hi, my name is Shuri. I am from Wakanda and I can help you remember." I just stare at her.

"How long will this take?" I ask quietly.

"Depends on the damage they have caused for you to forget everything. Could be a few days, weeks, months. If you have trigger words. We will make.."

"Trigger words? What does that mean?" I interrupt her.

"Words that change you into a different person. Like they did witht he winter soldier. When we got the files from the base you were held in, shows you do have some." Tony says to me.

"Oh, so then I guess we should start this thing." I tell them. They did not expect me to say that.

They step out of my cell and start to say 6 words in Russian.

"девять- nine"

"машина-car"

"цветок-flower"

At this word I started to feel a crawling sensation run across my skin. I started to blink rapidly, my vision was getting foggy.

"слива-plum"

"банан-banana"

Now I'm rolling my shoulders, flexing my hands, shaking my head. That crawling sensation is getting thicker, heavier.

"рок-rock"

Once that last word was said I stand up, look at them with a blank expression, and cock my head to the side a little. "готов подчиниться- ready to comply."

They ready the words and I am me again. Well the shell of me that I know. I sit on the bed and take deep breaths. I did not like the feeling of having no control.

They watch me before they leave me alone for a little bit. I don't remember those words but it felt like my body did and it hurt badly.

As i sit and then pace and sit again for I don't know how long, everyone else is in the common area trying to figure out what to do next.

"Her words are different from Bucky's, why?" Same asks as they watch me in my cell.

"They made the words unique for that person. Hers are more girly because she is a girl and what she likes. They make it so only one person gets triggered and not all at once." Bucky says with a frown.

As they continue to talk and see the next step. I am going a little crazy in my cell. I started to throw everything that I could, I tried breaking the walls, the floor. I was screaming, crying, and bleeding. No one knew of my powers because it was not put in any files. So when I fall to my knees and scream everything shuts down and I pass out.

Once the lights were out, they were up and running to my cell. As people in the building were trying to get the power back on.

When they get to me I was laying on the floor and covered in some weird goo. That started right as I hit the floor. Bruce went to check if I was okay and when he tried to check my pulse he got shocked. He steps away and goes to the others.

"This is not in her file, didnt show if she had powers or not. Why would they do that?" Natasha says as the nurses come in hazmat suits.

"Because she is more dangerous then we thought." Steve says sadly.

*********

That is part 1. Possibly a part two.