#wal mart christmas eve hours

[bbcinternationals]

Walmart christmas eve hours

[ultra-maha-us]

Rating A Product's Carbon Footprint - Creating A Wiki For Consumer Products

Lead paint in toys, tainted dog food, factories pumping tons of carbon into the air to make Barbies, while we turn our SUV in for a Prius. Feel better now? Before you have a 60s flash back and begin to boycott Wal-Mart and begin weaving your own hemp cloths, ask yourself is this really the answer? Many of us still live in complete ignorance of how the rest of the world lives, but a growing number of us are starting to get it. We realize that just making changes that impact our household or perhaps neighborhood are just not enough. So how can you make a change on a micro level that impacts the macro world?

I believe people, whether sitting in corporate boardrooms or working in a dirty plant in some dark corner of the world, really do care, but change does not happen in a vacuum. What drives change is empowerment of consumers that forces these factories to clean up their act. Boardrooms that see profit driven my consumer demand for cleaner safer products are compelled to change more than if we all collectively whine. Let's face it, until we live in a utopian society where money is abolished; change, real change comes when there is an incentive "profit" in making a change.

I grew up with Consumer Reports and spent hours as a kid pouring over all the charts of bubble ratings. Today things are a little faster passed, consumers require instant gratification. On-line sites such as Epinions now rate products as well as allowing you to contribute your own product review virtually in real-time. What if besides knowing the quality, consumer satisfaction and performance of a product, you know the product's carbon footprint?

As an example, if you are deciding ESG Strategy on a Cleanomatic 2000 and find it equal on all counts, but a little cheaper than a Mastercleaner 2, but it's carbon footprint was more than double, this information would be valuable to you the consumer. Would you perhaps buy the more marginally expensive product, knowing that it's expense to society was smaller? Talk about feeling good about a purchase decision!

But wait a minute, just think for a moment, let's say many thousands of other consumers made a similar buying decision, would this not have an impact on the dirty producer, the one that cut corners to shave a few nickels off their price? Would this not force them clean up their act to remain competitive? Now that is micro decision having a macro impact.

So how does it work? The key is simplicity, point of purchase real time accurate information and a system that is credible. Much like the peer input that created the likes of Wikipedia, a Carbon Footprint Consumer Index (CFCI) database would be fed inputs by consumers. Inputs such as a product's country of origin, recycleability, packaging content, durability, ISO 14001 certification and resource intensity, would all be factored into a CFCI algorithm. Let's say, you are buying a product made in China opposed to one locally, it is going to take more energy to ship the same product half way across the world. A product manufactured in a greener facility in Denmark is going to have a smaller carbon footprint than the same product made in an outdated dirty factory in Michigan. Japan's overall lower green house output per capita is going to fare better when considered against products from carbon hogs such as the US and China. Remember the doll under the Christmas tree that Grandpa had to find a pair of pliers to unravel a dozen plastic twist ties, encased in paperboard and plastic? Well it's sure going to have more of carbon footprint than the same doll with far less packaging.

Consumers YOU would feed data for the algorithm that drives the CFCI. Much of this information is readily available, such as the familiar recycling triangle off the product and country of origin. The more ambitious consumers would take the time to categorizing the type of packaging material and its appropriate weight. Even the algorithm for the CFCI will be developed by users, refined and better made to reflect the complexities of a product's true carbon footprint. Different algorithms eventually would be developed for categories of products, such as perishables, durable goods and consumer electronics that have different input considerations.

[hendratds]

Quotes of Wisdom 2k19

Happy New Years, peeps!! I hope 2020 has been starting out well for you! Here's some context before we start.

For all of 2019, I developed a list of quotes that I have uttered from January all the way to December. These are things I've said out loud that have either helped my friends or have earned me some questionable looks.

Either way, let's get into it!!

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"A tree as old as time will feel inadequate should it compare it's worth to the shine of a gemstone." - Esh, during a convo where she was trying to comfort a friend who felt inadequate.

"Scream into the night so that the morning may hear the echoes." - Esh after being asked what she was thinking about while disassociating.

"You're my stars that light up the dark, bleak skies of my darkest hours." - Esh after being comforted out of an anxiety ridden depressive episode.

"And what are our eyes but windows to the universes we hold inside ourselves?" - Esh during one of her Space Nerd/Universal Awe at existence moments.

"The nature of humanity is to repeat history, for it seems they cannot learn from the mistakes of their ancestors." - Esh after being done with Humanity for the umpteenth time.

"Who you are will never truly leave you." - Esh, replying to something her sister said.

"I want to see the world be as beautiful as the stardust it was born from." - Esh, during a daydream.

"I want to scream into the abyss. But will she scream back?" Esh after being asked how she is feeling.

"Sometimes we feel empty, incomplete, as if life has lost its meaning. But keep going, for there is always something or someone out there that will make you feel like you have a heart again. You just have to find it." Esh, laying in bed contemplating the meaning of life.

"My heart lies beyond the reaches of this world. I eagerly await the day I return to it." Esh, immediately after the previous quote.

"I am but a corpse, kept animated by the ludicrous amount of salt and preservatives I consume. If I start eating healthy, I will rot." Esh while eating at a restaurant.

"Matter cannot be created or destroyed, only dispersed into the energy that makes up its atoms. Thus, our atoms are as old as the universe itself. Which makes us as old as the universe, too. You hold ancient knowledge in your cells." - Esh, after drinking too much caffiene

"Even the ground would not want you to rot within it." - Esh, reciting a threat for a Star Wars fanfiction.

"Do you feel the fear within your veins? I do. My heart is burning. My emotions have transcended beyond anything I can comprehend." - Esh, speaking of her visceral fear of the IKEA hive.

"God left me a long time ago. When he gazed into my eyes when they first opened, he saw not a sheep but a llama. And I am pretty sure I spit in his face when I was a kid, because baby me was, indeed, that much of a little shit." - Esh's brain thinking without her consent.

"I can say I am angry, that my heart burns with rage towards humanity as we know it. Or I could say my passionate yearning for the safety of those I care about is so strong that I am willing to uproot society as we know it. One is definitely a better mindset than the other." - Esh during another episode where she yearns to destroy humanity.

"What if the path I wish to trek is not a path He can follow me down?" - Esh, aftering being asked to join a church group.

"God is not dead. But he wishes he was." - Esh's brain, in a disembodied voice that was not Esh.

"Innocent? Any innocence I might have had was ripped from me long ago. I probably purged it when I screamed in Wal-Mart when my parents didn't get me the toy I wanted." - Esh, after being called "innocent".

"I do not cry because I am weak. I cry because I have been too strong for too long." - Esh during a dream.

"Inadequate is your argument! Bugs must have infested your throat, for all I hear from you is meaningless buzzing!" - Esh, reciting a Draggolph insult.

"Different are my mind and eyes. People see the world as they were taught. Do others see it like I do? Does humanity see the beauty in this world? Or do they see it all in monotones, dull, and lifeless? Like I have been these past few weeks?" - Esh during a creative personal narrative.

"I see the world in words. The Universe is telling a story, so I listen." - Esh, explaining how she sees the world.

"The version of you people create in their heads is not your responsibility. You cannot change someone who is committed to misunderstanding you, nor are you obligated to change to fit their image of you. Be you and find people who will understand you and love you for who you are." - Esh. No context. She was scrolling Tumblr and suddenly thought of this.

"I'm so tired. ("Of what?" Asked her friend.) Of being alive in such a Hell strewn world, of having to conform to survive, of having to hide my true self because it would be detrimental to my life. That I cannot breathe. I ask for air, but they merely push me further into my grave." - Esh during a small depressive episode. She was playing Minecraft a few minutes later.

"He told her she was as clear as a musical note, as sincere as a melody. What does that make me? I do not feel clear, but many say I am sincere. I think. Am I dubstep?" - Esh pondering life.

"I find it tiring that society these days is more of a masquerade than a civilization." - Esh after waking up on a Monday.

"I wish to exist in a way where people feel like they are merely waiting in a liminal space. We meet, we talk, but you feel mostly like you're transitioning to a new state of mind or existence. You voice this and look over to me for my opinion. I am gone. Your memory is faded. All you see are colors and abstract shapes in place of our conversation. You are left with the vague sense that you just met someone." Esh during a depressive state while walking to theatre.

"Do not blame me for a sin I have not committed." - Esh after being blamed for making a pizza box too hard to open. It was the delivery guys fault, not mine. I swear.

"Humanity bases their most terrifying beasts off of themselves, for they know nothing more monsterous." Esh, during an English Lecture.

"If I cannot feel the abs of my beloved, then I will get in shape and grow my own to compensate." Esh missing her datemate.

“Netflix and chill? I call it Egg Cream Brûlée” - Esh being horny in her own unique way.

"Humanity is something I lost a long time ago. Call me a monster all you wish, I'd rather be a beast than a human." - Esh during a daydream.

"I know not how many more tears I am willing to give this world." - Esh, during a small depressive episode.

"A child's judgement is second only to Gods'." - Esh

"I want to see them burn in the flames of their own sins." - Esh declaring war against her asshole roommates.

"Exist on the second dimension like the shadow you cast." - Esh during an inspirational rant.

"This world is made out of dreams, and many of them are becoming quite stale or nightmarish. So why not add yours so we can get some fresh air?" - Esh during that same inspirational rant.

"The mind is a prison. One that I willingly subject myself to. For now at least." - A text almost sent by Esh until she realized the context of the conversation.

"I'd rather be a beast of beasts than be a slave to the corrupted." - Esh talking about her yearning to go into politics so she can fix shit.

"My home will always hold my heart. No matter how far away it is, no matter how alone I may feel, I know I have a home to return to. I know they'll wait for me. But by the gods, it hurts to be unable to hear their heartbeats." - Esh, missing home on Christmas Eve.

"Until I can hear your heart again, wait for me." - Esh, right after the last quote. By Chaos, I was homesick af

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Now to get started on 2020 Quotes of Wisdom!

Also I'm tagging my sibs @square-stingray @snoodly-boop

[wolfenwingsshop]

I will always yell at the bird to eat his cookies.

So, here we go, fam. This is gonna be a long one.

So, Christmas Eve evening, just this past year. We had exchanged gifts already, my family had gotten me some socks (including some Mega Man ones with X on them!!) and Nova and Poi had secretly downloaded Breath of the Wild to our Switch while we slept that night before! I was watching the husband finish up his first tour in Smash Ultimate's "World of Light" campaign and was finishing up our family batch of Christmas Cookies.

I had a few snowmen left, so I decided to make a snow X. Then a snow Zero. And finally a snow Axl. I also made a few stars into Starmen. Why not, right? I posted my cookies to my Twitter with the tags of #Christmas, #MegaManX, etc. They didn't look too wonderful, Zero put in a bit too much milk when he helped me out to make the frosting. ^^;

Then Protodude retweeted it, as well as the MM Network's twitter, unbeknownst to myself at the time. My husband, Zero, had just finally found X and Zero's souls at the end of WoL, and just had rescued X when my phone started buzzing like mad. It had just struck midnight, Christmas morning. I figured it was probably some of my netfriends wishing me a happy holiday, and I'd get to them in a bit when I was done with the cookies and my fingers weren't covered in frosting.

My phone starts going off even more. Like, to where if I didn't know better, I'd say there's an emergency. Finally, I pick up my phone to a swamp of retweets and likes. Sooo many people. I start spazzing, natch.. and then I notice a "sonicmega" aka Sean Chiplock aka fucking Revali in the goddamned game I just got for Christmas today fucking Christ I KNEW HE WAS A MEGA MAN FAN BUT WHAT WHY IS HE LIKING MY CRAPPY COOKIES THEY LITERALLY LOOK LIKE WHITE TURDS ---

So noticing the fuggin voice actor that has happened across my cookies, I thanked him for even acknowledging my crappy work.

I'll let the next image explain itself.

OK SO TO SAY THE LEAST I WAS FLOORED. HE WANTS MY CRAPPY COOKIES. ARE YOU KIDDING ME.

Ok, ok, so I responded that I would, as soon as Christmas was over. ..and MagFest, kinda forgot MagFest.

Zero got laid off less than an hour onto his first day back from his vacation to MagFest. I mean, we were planning on having him look for a new job, come spring, considering how crappily paid he was compared to similar engineering jobs in the area, but now we at least had more free time to make cookies!

So as soon as that was over, I was chomping at the bit to Zero. "Hon. We need butter and milk so I can make Mr. Chiplock's cookies!!!" "Right, right..." and off Zee would toddle back into Wal-Mart or Aldi or whatever to get the required item. (I have a bad back and a bad knee that loves to flare up this time of year thanks to the cold, and my husband is the least broken of the two of us.)

Regardless, that weekend after MagFest we got to work and made the batter. Zero cut nothing but snowmen and a few stars and cooked them, the next night I went and made the frosting. We set aside the required colors to make more X, Zero, and Axl snowmen. We made a few starmen too.

So these guys came out a lot better! After they were done, I included a picture to Mr. Chiplock via PM.

Lol, yeah he liked 'em.

I froze them until Zee and I were ready to send. (I wanted to wait until Zee started getting his Unemployment checks. I also wanted to do a picture and include the recipe so Mr. Chiplock can make his own if he wanted to.) I forgot to take a picture of the finished art but here's the WIP:

Anyhoooo.. I just sent them off today. Here's hoping they make it over there okay! (N.Y. to Cali... whew!)

He's a Mega Man fan. He's one of US.

We Mega Man fans gotta stick together.

[brokestminimalist]

‘Tis the season...

…for stress, suicide, and heart attacks.

Listen up.  Christmas is December 25th, every single year.  It doesn’t sneak up behind you like a mugger in a dark alley.  It’s never a surprise.  You can’t possibly forget when it is.  Since that is the case, there is no excuse for anyone to be shopping for Christmas gifts on the 24th.  Or the 23rd, for that matter. Or that entire week, in fact. Christmas Eve is a day that you should be spending with your family and friends, cooking, playing games, reading together, wrapping gifts, etc.  You should not be at a store.  You should not be spending money.  You should not be contributing to the commercialization of what is otherwise a deeply meaningful holiday. You should not be imposing on retail workers, who are forced to spend this time away from their own families, just because you are a disorganized failure of a human who can’t be bothered to take care of your shopping at a reasonable time.  Get your crap together before the very last minute like a real adult.  (Yeah, that’s right.  We know you’ve just been fake adulting all this time.)

We, unfortunately, are that retail worker.  We spent Christmas Eve last year behind a customer service desk, getting yelled at by people who waited until the very last minute to buy This Year’s Big Thing and were angry that we were out of it.  On Christmas Eve.  Of course we are out of it. It’s Christmas Eve. You should be at home with your kids, not harassing poor retail drones who have no control over stock and just want to get off our feet and have Christmas dinner.  We did not get to see our families.  We did not get to play Dirty Santa or eat any pie or see Great Uncle Jim, who might not be around for that many more Christmases.   We didn’t get to watch the Peanuts special with the kids, because we were too busy taking care of these materialistic, inconsiderate sheeple who think that they need to rush out at the last minute to buy a bunch of stuff to impress relatives they see once a year or less.

Because that’s what it’s about, really.  They aren’t buying three hundred dollars worth of name brand toys and clothes out of the goodness of their hearts, they are doing it out of the obligation that Christmas creates.  They aren’t buying gifts because Jesus commanded them to care for the poor, they are just fulfilling an expectation.  They are spending money so that the rest of the family won’t think less of them.  And they’re going into debt.  At least half are making these purchases on credit cards, which they will spend the next several months paying down.  The gifts themselves will likely get played with for a few days and then put aside or quickly broken.  Next year, the cycle will begin again. Obligation, debt, disuse.  Meanwhile, pressure increases every year along with stress.  Kids don’t just get one gift from Santa, they get twenty. Parents work more hours so they can afford it. Heart attacks and depression rates skyrocket.

Is it worth it? Of course not. Stress literally shortens your life.  Is your sister going to remember what you got her this year in ten years?  No.  Are your kids?  Certainly not. What do you remember from when you were a kid?  Is it the presents themselves, or is it the feeling of Christmas?  Seriously.  They’re going to remember sitting by the tree with family, they’re going to remember playing with their cousins, baking cookies with grandma, and making snow angels with the neighbor kids.  We don’t remember what we got for Christmas when we were ten, but we remember sliding down a snow-covered hill on a trash can lid with our brother.  We remember making our own ornaments for the tree and leaving out milk and cookies for Santa.  We remember a pancake breakfast on Christmas morning, making s’mores in the fireplace, and talking on the phone to relatives who lived across the country. Mostly we remember the anticipation, the warmth, the closeness, rather than the toys or clothes we got and quickly broke or outgrew.

The solution is simple.  Just stop.  Don’t be a commercial Christmas gift giver.   Be creative, but don’t go shopping and don’t spend an excessive amount of money.  Think about the person this gift is for, and tailor it to them.  Give IOU’s for a chore like babysitting, grass cutting, or house cleaning.  Give out items that you sewed or baked.  Give out plants that you’ve grown, especially cooking herbs. Get together with other family members and start a college fund for the newest baby. Gather favorite recipes from the oldest generation and collect them into booklets for the one that’s coming of age. Make jars of sugar scrub.  Get one of your grandparents to sit with a voice recorder and tell stories from their childhood, then give copies to everyone. Teach a teenager how to drive or how to cook, something that they’ll take with them and use for the rest of their lives. Sign the little kids up for library cards.  Make candles or soaps.  Make your own cards to go with them.  And don’t start in December!  Start early, get your projects going, and spend December enjoying your home and your family instead of fluorescent lights and crowded parking lots.

This is supposed to be the season of giving, so give! Give your time, your knowledge, or your skills.  Give the product of your hobbies.  And if you have been too busy or too broke for even those, then give a cozy morning with family. Give an old movie while drinking hot chocolate. Give a drive around town to check out the best Christmas lights. Give a game of catch or an afternoon building a snowman or a funny story by the fireplace.  Give advice.  Give hugs.  You can be generous without things and without money.  Get into the spirit of a minimalist holiday and drag your friends and family along with you. If they get mad at the lack of material items, you should probably get new friends.

A few other things, before we go.

We here at Brokest Minimalist don’t actually give or accept Christmas gifts, as a general rule.  This is kind of extreme, but it works for us.  We spread the word far and wide that we don’t want things, and we don’t buy things for people.  Instead, we make homemade cards every year to send out. We put in bits of poetry, our own drawings, and handfuls of glitter.  Why?  We want to acknowledge the season and wish others well for the start of the new year, but we don’t want to contribute to the obligation/debt/disuse cycle and we don’t want to encourage our loved ones to do the same.  If we wind up attending an event, we bring a batch of brownies or pumpkin butter along as tribute.  We do not bring individual gifts, nor do we spend a single minute of our time shopping or looking at advertisements or giving any shits what the latest and greatest thing is.  We do not have holiday stress, except as it is forced onto us by excessive traffic or having to spend three hours in line at Wal-Mart just to buy a loaf of bread or some dog food because everyone else and their mom is there trying to get last-minute gifts that they put about three seconds of thought into.

This is difficult for our family.  Some people understood right away, but a few still don’t get it.  One relative still mails us a present every year, even though she lives in town, because she knows we won’t go to her house to get it.  We usually thank her politely and donate it to charity after the first of the year.  If you would like to go truly gift-free, we recommend letting your family know well in advance and being prepared for confusion.  If some continue to give you gifts anyway, accept them graciously and then donate them when you get a chance.  Or, tell them that they may give you gifts that are consumable, such as food, candy, hygiene products, candles, etc. Stuff that can get used up, in other words, and won’t linger around your house attracting more clutter.  Or, tell them to donate to a charity in your name. (An exception is if you have little kids. Please have a few things for them to unwrap on Christmas morning if that’s what they are used to.  It’s likely that they won’t understand and their upset will ruin the day for both them and you.  Let them unwrap a few presents and then distract them with games, delicious food, and visits with family.)

If someone you know is going minimalist and refusing to exchange gifts, please accept this and don’t argue with them about it. Don’t assume it’s because of money, though it may be in part.  Don’t feel sorry for them for the lack of gifts (although you can be sorry if they miss Christmas with your family because they were forced to work instead). Send them a card, give them a call, and wish them luck with their project.  When you buy someone a gift while knowing they don’t want you to, you aren’t doing them a favor.  You aren’t doing something nice, you’re giving them stress and guilt and an implied obligation to pay you back for your kindness.  So don’t do it. Take them at their word, wish them well, and go on with your life.  

If you have spent previous seasons stressing out, shopping, going into debt, or otherwise doing things you don’t want to do, spend today and tomorrow relaxing. Spend time with your family.  Have a hot bath, a cup of hot chocolate, an extra slice of pie.  Do some yoga, breathe deeply, and let it go. This year can be different; you can make it so. Lolz, we rhymed. 

Merry Christmas, Festivus, Kwanzaa, and a belated Happy Hannukah to everyone.  If none of those holidays suit you, we wish you peace, love and ice cream anyway.  

Links: simple Christmas links from becomingminimalist, sugar scrub recipe

[bomberqueen17]

sugarspiceandcursewords replied to your post “sugarspiceandcursewords replied to your post “whoa goddamn, my...”

I mean, I can just...ask somebody at work, if you want. Don’t really need to have a reason other than “a friend was curious.” A couple of my best friends from my old office are NCOs who have been through Airmen Leadership School and all that noise, so they ought to be pretty clear on the USAF interpretation of that aspect of the UCMJ, at least. Your story will work regardless, but if you want the data point, I’ll try to get it.

If you can casually bring it up without sounding like a weirdo, I’d love more data points. I’m also curious as to how someone would be seen if they’d been an NCO and went to officer training. Like, would they get a lot of shit for it? But I know people do, it’s just not common. (I get that civilians sort of don’t grok the divide between enlisted and officers, and just sort of think that privates could naturally get promoted all the way up to generals if they were just Motivated enough, because that’s a reasonable assumption if you have no idea how it really works. But that’s super not how it works, and plenty of people serve long distinguished careers in the armed forces as enlisted personnel, and it’s perfectly respectable and the promotions work basically the same way, you just start and end in a different place.)

I’m sure I can casually broach it with my sister too, it’s just hard to get ahold of her, especially now that she’s not only Supermom but also working 40 hours a week. (How’s that going, I asked her, as we raided a Wal-Mart at dawn on Christmas Eve Eve for stocking stuffers. She grimly hauled the minivan about and said, uh, it’s going, but I dunno how long it can keep going.)

sugarspiceandcursewords replied to your post “sugarspiceandcursewords replied to your post “whoa goddamn, my...”

(Also, you wanna start some salty enlisted folks on a rant, ask ‘em why the USAF doesn’t have warrant officers, especially in this new world of remotely piloted aircraft, etc. Guaranteed entertainment.)

WTF why DOESN’T the USAF have warrants?!?!?! I just-- assumed they-- were a thing!!! Why wouldn’t they be?? The Air Force only split off from the Army like ten minutes ago ok 70 years ago why wouldn’t they keep the structure???

Dad loved being a warrant because nobody fucks with them. They’re not high up enough to be Political, but they’re high up enough that they know what’s up, and they’re rare enough that they stick together, and if you fucks with the warrants, your paychecks will go missing until the end of time and there’ll be Nothing That Can Be Done unless you figure out how to magically appease the Warrant Officers. He was like, a troublemaking little eldritch horror for the last five or so years of his very long career, and he was just in his glory the whole time. The enlisted guys thought he was hilarious and the officers just sort of tried to steer clear of him. 

(And, at retirement, he got a major’s pension, so in the end, he wasn’t all that bitter.)

(Also, at retirement, he got a very sweet send-off from a general who didn’t know him at all, but knew this was his very last exercise, and so had bothered to look at his file and find out who he was and why he was still around, and so gave him a very kind impromptu little speech at the general assembly thing, whatever that was called [he started off by asking the crowd how many of them had been born before 1967, because that was the year Dad got his 2LT commission; most of them hadn’t been born yet], and then they let Dad fire off all the about-to-expire machine gun ammunition at the range for the sheer hell of it. Not a bad send-off at all.)

[writingevanhansen]

Day 11 - Christmas Shopping with Evan

I should’ve released this on Black Friday but here we are yknow lmao

-so evan is...most definitely not excited about this.

-he has always heard the bad stories about people throwing punches and whatnot

-but you’ve been around a time or two before so you reassure him that it’ll be okay

-(really you just want to go grab a hot deal on the emoji movie lolol)

-as you drove to wal-mart, you felt his grip tighten around your hand and you squeezed

-”ev, hun, i promise that it’ll be okay. nothing will hurt you, and no old ladies will punch you, alright?” you smiled with a small giggle

-evan nodded

-”okay, let’s go in”

-you had made sure to come in a couple hours afterwards so the major stuff had died down

-you make sure to never let go of evan’s hand unless completely necessary

-evan’s palms started to become clammy, so you pointed out things that had been left behind in awkward places

-like a snowman pillow in the men’s clothing

-and a child’s couch in the dvd’s

-they made evan giggle which made you smile

-you found the sale section for the movies, so you let go of evan’s hand and began digging

-you felt a shift in weight beside you, and saw evan squatted down looking with you, and you smiled. usually he’d stand back

-you found that hot deal on the emoji movie

-plopping down on your couch at home after a successful shopping trip with your guy, you cuddled up to watch the greatest cinematic masterpiece ever created

[searching-for-mercury]

Voltron -- Klance -- Fake BF

All I Want for Christmas is a (Fake) Boyfriend

Summary: A while ago, in a fit of anger, Keith told his mom he had a boyfriend. Did he actually have a boyfriend? No. Did he care? Also no. At least, not until his mom, months later, tells him to bring his supposed boyfriend over for the holidays. Not wanting to admit he didn’t have one, Keith asks around for someone to play the role and who agrees to play the part? The annoying guy from his Lit class.

(ao3)

----

Chapter Three

It was warm. That was the first wriggle of thought when he woke up, but Keith hadn't yet opened his eyes. Warmth and comfort. The blankets were thick and perfect and he dreaded the thought of having to throw them off, to feel the sting of cold air. He curled up a little tighter. Something warm was pressed up against his back and he figured it was a folded piece of blanket, rolled up or something to feel so compact and sturdy.

              And then he blinked his eyes open and remembered. He tried looking over his shoulder, but all he saw was what looked like another shoulder. From what he could make out, his back was pressed up against Lance's, which...

              Okay, he wasn't going to lie, not to himself. That was stupid. It felt nice. A level of comfort that went further than just the warm sleepiness of early mornings.

              And of course, the moment he decided to close his eyes again and get as much out of that feeling as he could, Lance stretched out. Keith heard the fabric of the pillow rustle as he lifted his head to look around. Then he must have leaned forward because Keith's back was hit with a shock of cold so sudden, he yanked at the blankets.

              "Oh, sorry," Lance said, leaning back. "Wanted to look at the time."

              The sun was peeking between all the slats and cracks in the wooden blinds, giving the room a fuzzy dark light. He could see most everything, but not the details.

              "And? What time is it?" he asked, suddenly conscious of how his voice sounded -- kind of croaky. But so did Lance's, so maybe it didn't matter.

              "Almost nine-thirty," he replied through a yawn. "If I wasn't smelling bacon right now, I could honestly keep sleeping."

              He was right -- his mom was probably making breakfast, which was something she always did when he was visiting. It was also Christmas Eve, so maybe the reason was somewhere in there, too.

              Lance said he'd be down in a bit, so Keith trudged down the stairs alone, still thinking about his warm bed. He'd gotten to the bottom of the staircase when the front door opened, letting in a gust of frosty air.

              "Hey there, look who's up," his dad said, pulling in a pine tree bundled up in netting. "When you and Lance are done with breakfast, we're going to decorate this like we've never decorated anything in our entire lives."

              "So...really, really badly?" Keith said.

              His dad laughed and closed the door.

              When Lance had said 'a bit,' he really should have said, 'about a half hour.' Keith was already working through his second plate of pancakes when the guy in question walked down, looking very much not like how he'd woken up. He strolled over with a smile and pressed a kiss to Keith's temple like he did it every morning.

              "If you don't like the syrup here, there's more in the fridge," his mom said, scooping another batch out of the pan and onto a plate.

              Lance opted for blueberry, Keith noticed, without much surprise.

              After their dishes were cleaned up and the dishwasher was humming away, Keith's mom ushered them into the family room, where his dad had put up the tree. He'd already strung up the lights, which was always the very first thing to do when decorating a tree, as he'd once explained to Keith a long time ago.

              "I brought up the boxes with decorations while you two were still sleeping," she explained. "So let's have at it. Everyone grab a box."

              Keith opened the one closest to him and found bulbs in all their original packaging staring up at him. If his mom played video games, she'd be a queen at Tetris. He genuinely hoped he wasn't going to be the one to have to put them away.

              "So Lance, how is Christmas like at your place?" his dad asked, looping a bulb on a golden hook. There was a bag full of them on the table.

              "Um, well, it's usually very loud," Lance replied. There was something about his voice that felt off, like he was nervous or uncertain. It made Keith look up. "Growing up, there was always a lot of people around and we never had a real tree, like this. The real thing looks much nicer, by the way."

              His dad chuckled. "The plastic ones are too thin," he said. "You can see right through 'em. I've always preferred the real ones myself."

              Lance smiled in return. "These ornaments are really pretty!" he said and Keith had the feeling it was maybe a deliberate change in topic. "And there are so many of them! Are we going to fit them all on the tree?"

              "We sure as hell are going to try," Keith replied. Stuff the tree with ornaments -- weigh the branches down with seemingly weightless glass bulbs. Yes.

              The end result was a tree so full of so many different styles and colored bulbs that, when the lights were turned on, it sparkled and twinkled like the way stars reflect off a lake. It filled Keith with a feeling he couldn't really name: just warm, peaceful, with a tinge of excitement. Kind of like eating those chocolate covered gingerbread cookies that had a layer of jelly hidden somewhere inside.

              "I want to go take some pictures," his mom announced.

              "I'm not dressed," Keith protested.

              "Not of you," she replied. "The tree!"

              Lance let out a short, loud laugh.

              Keith glared.

              "You can still get dressed, though," his dad said. "We need to pick up a few things at the supermarket."

              "On Christmas Eve?" Keith asked, still giving Lance the lingering remains of his glare.

              Lance didn't try to look even a little bit guilty -- he poked a bit of his tongue out at him.

              "It's Wal-Mart -- they're open forever," his dad replied. "Well, most of the time, anyways. Poor guys. Anyways, get your butt moving. The sooner we get there, the sooner we get back, the sooner I can make my eggnog."

              And that's how, half an hour later, the three of them were tucked into his dad's truck. He didn't know if it was because he was the shortest or what, but he was the sucker who got to sit in the middle seat, between driver and passenger. He also would have been done earlier if Lance hadn't insisted on blow-drying Keith's hair.

              "I'm not letting you freeze off your hair," he'd said. "It's gonna make it look like shit later on. And you could probably catch a cold and die, I dunno, I'm not a doctor. But definitely the thing with it looking like shit!"

              Soon they were wandering the aisles of Wal-Mart, chucking bags of chips into the cart and trying to stay out of the way from those last-minute shoppers, the ones with pinched, tense expressions who huffed a lot.

              "Do you like eggnog, Lance?" his dad asked as he set a bag of marshmallows in, next to a pack of minty candy canes. Keith suspected they were going to be used with hot chocolate.

              "I've only ever had the store-bought kind," Lance replied.

              "And?"

              "It was pretty good."

              "Watch out, he's going to tell you you've never had eggnog until you've had his," Keith said.

              His dad gave him a look. "It's true, though," he said. "Mine is the best. Even your grandma said it and she's impossible to please."

              Keith wanted to point out that his grandma loved anything with booze in it, but his dad was proud of his eggnog and it was good.

              They continued winding their way down the aisles, talking about school and work and friends. The way his dad talked to Lance, like he was already part of the family -- it gave him a sour feeling in his gut. It was guilt, he knew it was guilt. His dad was being so nice and he'd always been understanding. It felt so wrong to trick him like that, to lie. Would he be mad if Keith told him why he'd done it, if he confessed?

              Another feeling, lurking under all that sour guilt, was something a little softer. Having Lance shoot him smiles, the way he'd hit Keith's shoulder in a joke, or even the goofy eyebrow waggling he'd do even when what he was talking about wasn't suggestive -- all that combined with spending time with one of the most important people in Keith's life. It was nice. It felt real and knowing it wasn't made him want to kick something.

 ~*~

                The eggnog was finished before dinner started, but Keith's mom swore they would all wake up in the snow if they so much as dared look at it before sitting down to eat the meal she'd spent so long preparing. It was chicken, covered in something that tasted like rosemary, but was definitely more than just rosemary. Homemade brown gravy had mushrooms and onions poking through the surface. Buttery mashed potatoes were exactly how Keith always remembered them -- small chunks of potato left un-mashed, but so, so soft. Then there were the green beans, because no meal could go without vegetables, but they were swimming in their own creamy white sauce and Keith knew he would never figure out how they were made without asking.

              Even when he was finished with college, Keith didn't think he could ever cook like his mom. He wasn't sure he should even try.

              "So what's Keith like when he's at school?" his dad asked. He happened to ask at the exact moment Keith was shoveling a piece of chicken in his mouth. Coincidence? He thought not.

              Did Lance even know? Could he have picked anything up from their brief time together?

              But Keith didn't have anything to worry about, because Lance just said, "Not too much different from how he always is."

              What an easy save. Had anybody asked Keith, he'd have froze.

              His dad laughed. "He's always been a quiet kid," he said.

              His mom scoffed. "When nobody bothers him," she said.

              "What's that supposed to mean?" Keith asked, having finally finished chewing the chicken.

              "See?" his mom replied, giving a grin he'd most certainly inherited. "So long as nobody bothers him, he's quiet and he does his own work. But the moment you mention his name or get in his way, he erupts."

              "Like a volcano," his dad added with a little half smirk, half smile.

              One time. One time had he said he wanted to live in a volcano and his parents still hadn't gotten over it. It had been high school and he'd gotten his wisdom teeth removed. The anesthesia had been strong. It was time to let it go.

              "Do you know how many times I had to go down to the school because he'd gotten in a fight?" she asked.

              Lance shook his head.

              "Me neither," she replied. "I lost count."

              Lance looked over at Keith with raised eyebrows.

              Keith shrugged.

              "How was school for you?" his dad asked. "I hope it wasn't full of fighting."

              "Oh no," Lance replied. "I liked school and got along with mostly everyone. It was fun. Of course, that doesn't mean I was a model student or anything."

              Did he skip? He looked like the kind of guy who would skip class with his friends.

              "And you saw...what exactly in Keith?" his dad asked.

              "Hey!"

              Lance laughed and it lit up his face -- one of his more natural smiles. "He's cute! And his looks aren't too bad either," he teased.

              "Anyways," Keith said, though he didn't really have anything to say. He just wanted to change the topic. He could feel the tips of his ears beginning to burn.

              Thankfully, Lance took the hint. "I was always pretty loud, disrupting class," he continued. "You know how they say you should think before you act? Yeah, that wasn't me."

              Keith could see it -- Lance being the one who always had something to say, something to make the class laugh and maybe also the teacher. Or just make them mad. He would be the one to stay after school to get his phone back or get told that he should be focusing on the lesson and not on building an army out of pencils and erasers. It kind of still showed, now that he was older. In the class they'd shared, Lance did always have something to say. Unfortunately, the teacher had a hard time figuring out how to guide the conversation back to the intended topic.

              With dinner coming to an end, Lance asked if there would be more board games.

              "Now we watch movies and drink ourselves silly with eggnog," Keith explained.

              "And stuff ourselves with cookies," his dad said.

              "That I made," his mom pointed out, staring at Keith with one of those disappointed looks where he couldn't ever figure out if his mom was teasing or not. Maybe both.

              "But first, you come with me," Keith said and pulled Lance out of his chair.

              "Uh," Lance said and pulled himself out of Keith's grip. "Thanks for cooking! It was amazing!"

              Of course he had to say something like that. Of course.

             His mom's eyebrows rose like she'd been just been verbally assaulted, but she ended up saying, "Holy hell, someone in this house has manners."

              Of course. Now anything he said would sound cheap, but if he didn't, it would be like he wasn't also thankful for his mother's cooking. "Thanks for the meal," Keith replied, feeling lame.

              "Yeah, yeah," his mom said, though a little smile of hers made him think she hadn't taken it quite as seriously as Keith.

              After Keith had successfully dragged Lance upstairs, he made him stand around while he dug into one of his bags.

              "What's happening right now?" Lance asked.

              "I need you to sign something," Keith replied. He found the card and held it up for Lance to take. "And then you can help me bring presents downstairs."

              "Isn't that tomorrow?" Lance asked, opening the card. Inside he'd find a hastily scribbled paragraph on how much Keith appreciated his mom. "Being Christmas day and all."

              "Yeah, but we're putting the presents under the tree tonight," Keith replied and then handed him another card to sign, this time for his dad. "We bought the presents for my parents together. Same with the cards. Okay?"

              "Sure," Lance said, reading the other card. "You've got crappy handwriting."

              "And?" Keith said. "You can still read it, right?"

              Lance made a face and tilted his head. "Eh."

              Keith threw a pillow at him.

              Once Keith had everything pulled out on the floor, he looked at it and then at Lance. There were only a couple presents -- a small collection of things for both his parents, so it would only take them one trip -- but Lance was still sitting on the carpeted floor, staring at them like they were a bundle of snakes and his one job was to touch them without getting bit.

              "Hey, what's up?" Keith asked. Had they been in an actual relationship, maybe it would have been okay to put his hand on his arm or something. He swatted that thought away.

              "I didn't bring presents."

              Keith relaxed. "I told you, we got them together. That's the story," he replied.

              "Yeah, but I mean for you. That'll look weird, right? Us not giving each other presents on a holiday meant for just that?" Lance said.

              "Okay, first off, I think this holiday technically started off with a baby called Jesus and-or greedy corporate hands," Keith pointed out. "And we'll just tell them we gave each other presents before we came here."

              Lance stared at the presents a little longer, but he nodded.

              They journeyed back downstairs, unloaded the wrapped packages under the tree, and started setting up for the Christmas movie (or movies, plural, if they lasted that long). A red tin full of cookies went on the coffee table and everyone spooned their own eggnog into glass mugs. Keith's mom brought out blankets, which Lance looked a little too eager to receive. The movie was popped in and they got comfortable.

              Comfortable for Keith and Lance meant sharing a blanket on the loveseat, Lance's arm around Keith's shoulders, bringing him in so they could lean against each other. Keith looked up at Lance, unable to help noticing how Lance still smelled great, even after their long day. Lance smiled at him, all soft and tender and entirely unfair, because Keith had to take a deep breath to try and calm his heart a little.

              With several refills and half the cookies eaten, they made it to a second movie. Lance was always the one offering to get everyone a second or third or seventh glass of eggnog and his mom eventually shushed him, saying they'd get one when they needed it or ask him when he stood up. Keith found himself relaxing more and more into Lance's side, to where he was tucked right up next to him in a way Keith never thought would ever happen in real life.

              The heat from the blanket and from Lance made him forget about his mom's disbelief about his sexuality, about the general looming thought of maybe never finding anyone, not like how they do in the movies with hetero pairings. Eventually the movie they were watching stopped making sense and he just closed his eyes for a moment. Only a moment. To rest them. Just rest.

              And then he was opening them again and everything was colder than it had been. Lance was still there, but the blanket?

              "What," Keith started, but he didn't remember to finish because he was looking around. The movie wasn't playing -- they weren't even in the family room.

              "Hold on a little longer," Lance said.

              They were going up the stairs. "Why are you," he started again.    

              "You fell asleep," Lance said and his tone was low, quiet. Where were his parents? "I'm just bringing you to bed."

              "Why?" Keith's voice felt too loud. He still felt disoriented even so he knew where they were and he did know why, kind of. Lance was carrying him, that's why they were where they were.

              "Hey now, I treat all my relationships like this," Lance said. They'd reached the top and were heading towards their room. "Even the fake ones." He gave a smile even so he was a little out of breath and it made Keith frown. Frown because he didn't want Lance to be so nice, so sweet, so...

              His brain made the connection with feelings and images rather than words.

              And it hurt.

 ~*~

                When Keith opened his eyes, it wasn't because he wanted to. In fact, his eyes burned the moment they did, and he turned away from Lance's stupid face and the window to seek comfort in his pillow. It was so warm. The blankets were tucked in around him and there was a weight on his legs that was probably his horrible fake boyfriend.

              "Go away," he croaked.

              "It's Christmas! Aren't you excited?"

              "No." Keith tugged at the blanket, pulling it up towards his face.

              "But I smell spices like cinnamon. And there's Christmas music playing."

              Keith had no idea what he was talking about, but he wasn't all that interested.

              The weight on his legs disappeared along with the blanket.

              "Hey!" Keith shot up as the cold hit him.

              Lance was standing on the other side of the room, blankets bundles in his arms. He'd already taken a shower and was wearing a navy colored sweater.

              "Are you getting up or what?"

              Keith rubbed at his eyes -- he'd been staring. "Yeah, yeah, hold on. Let me at least go to the bathroom," he mumbled. His feet were cold but his face was burning.

              Downstairs, his mom had breakfast in the oven and "All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth" was playing on the radio. His dad was setting the table and his mom was perched on the sofa, angled in such a way that she would most definitely see whoever, in her words, "finally decided to drag their butts out of bed."

              "I'm not the one in pajamas," Lance said, eyeing Keith like he just didn't know what he was to do with him.      

              "It's Christmas," Keith protested. "How about we put off dragging me until at least after breakfast."

              There were a lot more shiny, wrapped presents under the tree than there had been the night before. Lance even commented on it, eyes wide, but Keith told him it was normal. His mom always liked waiting until everyone was asleep before stuffing the tree with more gifts -- even after he stopped believing in Santa.

              "Here you go, Lance," his dad said, handing him a medium-sized box.

              Keith had never seen Lance's face go so blank, so fast. "For...me?" he asked. He took the present, but it was with uncertain hands.

              "We weren't going to let you get away empty handed now," his dad replied. "We both picked out a couple things together, but, well, we didn't know much about you."

              His mom had a very pinched expression that made Keith wonder how involved she'd been in the actual gift-buying, but he wasn't going to ruin it by saying anything. Not on Christmas.

              It ended up being two sweaters, a scarf, a set of pajamas, and a Christmas-themed mug stuffed with chocolate. All the clothes were either gray or black and came with gift receipts.

              "But we figured, if you're dating our boy, you might have similar tastes," his dad continued. "Which is, well, a bit lacking in color, but at least it'll probably go with most things? And of course, if the size don't fit, you can exchange or return them."

              Lance's thumb was stroking the fabric from the pajamas and he didn't say anything for a good long while. When he did, he smiled in a way that made Keith want to rub it away, to make it stop, to fix it. "Thank you," he said. "I honestly can't believe-- I mean, thank you."

              "Of course," his dad said with one of his warmest smiles.

The guilt gnawed on his insides a little more.

              Keith received similar presents, but thankfully, they didn't match Lance's. He wasn't sure if he'd be able to wear them if he knew, somewhere out on campus, Lance owned the exact same thing.

              Clean-up was a team effort, but it was mostly just shoveling the torn up wrapping paper in a big plastic bag. Breakfast entailed a lot of pumpkin bread, hot chocolate, and near-future plans. The only thing on Keith's mind was when they ought to leave so they could avoid traffic on the way home. But they all agreed to stay for lunch, so after they'd both packed their bags, Keith brought out his old PlayStation 2 and they set it up in the family room.

              "Hey," Lance said, holding his arms out as Keith stood up from where he'd crouched, putting a disc in. "Come here."

              Keith frowned, but did as he was told, carrying two controllers. He found himself being tugged down for a kiss and that was fine, but it turned into one of those kisses Lance had given him in the car. And that was fine, too, but it was a little too fine, too okay. Keith liked the way Lance's hand would curve around his jaw, his thumb pressing just ever so slightly. And the way his mouth was soft, at first, but with each little push it was a little firmer, a little more insistent. It made his shoulders tense but his insides melt and he found that his own arms were wrapping around Lance all by themselves.

              Somebody coughed, but it didn't register as his mom until a moment later, when they pulled apart.

              Lance leaned back and shared a devious sort of smile that only Keith could see.

[fnewstoday]

How To Carry Out New Year Party Shopping Efficiently

Holiday sales in the USA are a tradition and an integral part of American culture. These days, you can really save well if you reasonable approach to shopping. To carry out New Year party shopping, you need to take into account some points that will help you buy all the gifts that you wanted to give to your close people and friends, while saving as much as possible. How many discounts and special offers, so many opportunities to spend money on yourself for your family. But is it worth rushing to the offers of stores? How to be sure that the selected offer is really profitable, and not just another advertising move, or worse - the scam bait? We took care of you and wrote some tips that will help you efficiently carry out New Year party shopping and navigate the world of American sales this holiday season.

help-you-efficiently-carry-out-New-Year-party-shopping

Black Friday

Black Friday marks the unofficial start of holiday sales in the United States, and more and more in other countries of the world. Many large retailers offer discounts on popular gift items such as electronics - smartphones, tablets? computers and others, clothing and shoes, as well as household goods. As a rule, promotions begin a few days, or even weeks before Black Friday, and continue until the new year. In recent years, many stores also start selling themselves under the slogan “Black Friday sale” not on Friday, but a few days before Friday and they last a few more after Friday. Of course, shops do this in pursuit of greater profits, but buyers only benefit from this, as they have more time to look for really worthwhile offers. In this regard, here are some tips from the shoppers on how to efficiently carry out New Year party shopping.  Go to the stores websites with the goods you are interested in a few days before the "Black Friday" to find out when they start selling and how many offers will be valid. Make sure that you have not missed any notes about the quantity of a product that will be sold at discounts. Often stores make limited offers and you may not have time to buy goods at a discount, simply because they will be sold out to you. This often happens with the most popular and trending goods this season. Also make sure that there are no conditions for the discount to affect the product you are interested in before deciding where exactly you will buy this gadget, for instance, as soon as sales begin. For example, an iPhone or tablet may be at a big discount, but only when connected to a certain mobile operator, or the discount on a computer is only valid if you purchase an additional guarantee. When comparing offers from different stores, pay attention to details. The same-looking goods, even of the same model, can have different characteristics, which will affect the difference in price.

Cyber monday

Have you had time to buy a Michael Kors handbag or G-Shock watch on Black Friday discounts? Don’t worry, you still have a chance for New Year party shopping and get a discount on Monday following Black Friday, and often in the next few weeks. Cyber Monday is a popular day of huge sales in US online stores. As with Black Friday sales, many stores make unique discount offers for online purchases.

Christmas Sales

Starting from Black Friday until Christmas, US stores conduct promotions and sales under the slogan "Christmas Sale" at December 24th-25th. Christmas sales are traditionally considered the most ambitious and most generous on discounts for the whole year. Naturally, the largest selection of products in online stores at the very beginning of Christmas sales. As Christmas approaches, the assortment of goods at sales decreases noticeably and it is no longer always possible to buy a thing you like or choose the right size. Goods are bought back so quickly that stores do not always have time to update availability information on their sites. Christmas Eve discounts may up to 80%, but don’t delay your purchases at the last moment of the Christmas Eve, because you may simply not find what you need after a big sale. It is better to use a personal loan to buy gifts earlier at a slightly higher price with a lower discount than to leave your loved ones and yourself without welcome gifts. Walking around the Internet in the holiday season, it is safest to make purchases in trusted online stores and not succumb to too huge discounts from unknown sellers. For a list of popular stores with which you can be sure of your purchases. Enjoy safe shopping by following our tips.

A New Year sale

New Year and New Year discounts close the main sales season in America. Since the main winter holiday in the USA is, after all, Christmas, and not the New Year, the New Year's sales are not as large as Christmas ones. New Year's sale lasts until the end of January: everything that did not have time to sell for Christmas is being sold. There is no longer such an abundance of goods and such big discounts as before Christmas, many sizes and colors are missing. However, you can still find interesting offers from stores.

A-New-Year-sales-everywhere

How and when is it profitable to buy?

Of course, the most profitable shopping during holiday sales. Most chain stores often have sales, and products in the SALE section are updated daily. To efficiently carry out New Year party shopping get the chance to use biggest and most attractive offers can be found on holidays. Sales take place in the USA all year round, when stores try to get rid of the stale goods of the old collections at the end of each season, they necessarily lower prices before major holidays, such as Memorial Day in May, Independence Day and, of course, before Christmas. In addition to the holidays, stores often carry out one-day sales, arranging rainy days when you can buy goods many times cheaper than the original cost. Follow the store, subscribe to store news and stay up to date with all the special offers and discounts. For example, in one of Macy's, one of the largest and most popular American retail chains, one can often find clothes, shoes and accessories at lower prices than on the websites of the brands themselves, especially during short sales. There you can find models that are not on the official website of the brand or the size of some model that is not available on the official website. Sometimes, for the sake of this opportunity to buy what you need, you should use the support of creditors, if you did not initially expect such a chance. Most often, you will find Wal-Mart Stores stores that sell all kinds of goods and products and belong to one large network. Also in the very popular Masy's scattered across the country it is worth taking a closer look at clothes and shoes, electronics are also sold there. In almost every area of the city, you will also see Costco department store self-service stores. You can search for electronics at Best Buy Co, but if you are interested in products, then you have the supermarket chains Kroger, The Great Atlantic and Pacific Tea Company, as well as the small 7-Eleven. Fans of the "all at one price" system are waiting in Family Dollar and Dollar Tree stores, where, as the name implies, all products cost 100 cents, and in Dollar General prices can be slightly higher. Also in many stores you can try to bargain. If you laid eyes on an expensive thing, call the manager and discuss with him the possibility of discounts, for example, based on the fact that the subject of your dream has a slight defect, is in the window for some time or was a demonstration model, if in another place the same sold cheaper. Those who wish to save money are advised not to neglect coupons. They are not in vain very popular because they really work. They are printed in newspapers or on packages of goods, they will allow you to buy things at a discount. If you are planning to visit a large department store, be sure to visit its website the day before, where you will certainly find information about discounts, special promotions, and happy hours, all the same coupons can also be found there. This approach often allows you to save enough to recoup the costs of credit funds that you use for New Year party shopping.

How-and-when-is-it-profitable-to-buy

Observe safety measures and save your money

Do not give in to excessively tempting offers in search engines or social networks from unknown sellers. Fraudsters can offer huge discounts on popular products in order to get your information. By contacting them, you will voluntarily give away the data of your payment method, and your order will remain virtual. Many retailers offer to use their mobile applications in exchange for an additional discount. To protect yourself, download mobile applications from the official websites of online stores. Fraudsters can create so-called “impostor applications” in order to get your personal information. Be sure to use a secure Internet connection - avoid making purchases , especially payments, using public Wi-Fi. If you still have to surf the Internet through public Wi-Fi, you can always create a personal account on the website of the online store and add goods to the basket, and pay already in a secure Internet space. The store will save the added goods in the basket if you added them there, after entering your personal account.  Take advantage of the opportunities that open during the holidays to efficiently carry out New Year party shopping. Use a personal loan https://app.fnews.today/welcome if you are not sure if your budget is enough for all purchases. Since in spite of the fact that you have to pay the interest rate, big discounts compensate for these costs and you can even save extra on this. We hope our tips were useful to you. Remember them not only during the holiday shopping, but also at any other time, so that shopping is always profitable and safe. Read the full article

[wish4youff]

07 ~ Unlock Code

King

The weight in my chest was heavier than I anticipated. Yesterday, me and Mike Shaw my good friend from childhood days, had a quick conversation over the phone and somehow, someway, I slipped up and mentioned I was looking for a counselor. Regards to my lack of trusting a phone conversation; I allowed Mike the chance to inform me of Dr. Siri Sat Nam Singh. Therapist to the celebrities and known for his sessions which are recorded and aired through Nosey TV. So far, I only had the chance to watch a few. Kendrick Lamar, YG, Prodigy, and Freddie Gibbs. As emotional attached I became to these interventions and learning something new about rapper and influencers who I appreciate; it doesn’t mean this poor man could handle the truths of an US Government Assassin.  Besides that, I was sitting inside of my Lexus, my eyes wondered off to the iPhone resting on my lap. Not one chime for a notification has come from it since I delivered the message to my father on my intentions of speaking with Dr. Singh and as much as I disregarded the man’s approval; he was technically my boss. So, his say so was important. I made a pledge and swore in that the secrets I learned in this business would go with me to the graveyard and further, but I also knew how important my health is. The first session of a three-part agreement was taking place in ten minutes and as much as I rather be home in my bed, I was in Los Angeles, California, parked outside of Dr. Singh’s personal offices not too far from Beverly Hills, California.  With three different sessions, I knew I had three major principles to touch on. My mother, troubles and worries of my mind, and then, of course, Chrissie Smith.   There was still no response while I walked into the building, and nothing while I signed in with his receptionist at the front desk. I took a seat in the lobby; taking in the view of the colors of the office. Different shades of browns, achievements and awards, and timeline photos were presented around the area. Vintage mixed with modernized techs.

“Mr. Vitale, Dr. Singh is ready for your appointment. Would you like a water or anything? We have Coke beverages also.“  Hennessey. That’s what I need.  Shaking my head, I push off the wall directly across from the door which was entrance to the back of the office. The second we entered, I took the chance to look around at my surrounds. The tone-downed Brown sitting area was something worth taking the time to appreciate. Unlike the lobby, nothing besides two chairs and a small glass table sat in the center of the room. The entrance shifted your mindset some with the photos and achievements of others. In here, you were shifted back to what you came for. This was where you thought about it all. I could feel it. 

"Mr. Kingston Vitale."  The strong accent caught my attention. Coming face to face with one of the powerful and latest voices. If I could say. The man has helped a lot of his own people, come out and face their demons. I just hope me and Mike were right about him. "Just King.” I responded with as I took the seat on the right side, directly in front of his.

“Kingston, King’s town……Jamaica capital, a lot of islanders have name their sons after the powerful name. King; we both know the power behind that. Leader,” He started off with, sitting down in front of me. “Your parents have strong belief in you and most importantly want you to know where you’re from."  "My father is an Jamaican. He stands strong in his beliefs for a fact. We haven’t been back to Morant Bay since I was about ten. It’s been a minute, obviously.” Chuckling afterwards, trying to lighten my own darken mood.   As much as I tell myself I’m going back, I never find the time.  “What’s been keeping you from going back? You’re healthy looking man. Grown and you can take of yourself. I’m sure you can go home for a few days.”

“Of course,” Immediately the words came out my mouth. Almost making me feel bad for being so confident in my tone because I knew there was more to it than just going. “My mother loved Jamaica. The people, the culture. Everything. She married my father when she was only fifteen. How? I don’t know. They said it was common back in the days. Regardless, her love for the island made me not want to go. Not if she wasn’t there.”

“She wasn’t Jamaican?”

“No,” I said, laughing at the question because it reminds me of myself as a young boy. Curious. “She was an Italian woman.”

“Now, pardon me, King. But you continue to use past tense verbs. Leading me to believe something happened. What happened? If you don’t mind telling me.” And that’s when he asked me the golden question.

“My mother committed suicide in 2003, I was a junior in High School, going on 17 when it happened. That’s what set the tone for me, my father, and the rest of the family. There was this undeniable division placed in between everyone. My aunt, my mother’s oldest sister, always feels the need to remind me that my mother never wanted kids. Her side of the family, well besides one person, doesn’t know what pushed her to the ultimate breaking point. But they have ideas.” I know I dropped a bomb on him, but I’m a straight forward kind of guy. And I would’ve have come here today if I didn’t plan to get some kind of healing done.  “I’m sorry for your lost, first off. Suicide is heavy, its unbearable and even though I understand this is hard for you. You’re getting through it. That’s a major step,” Dr. Singh said. “You said something interesting, though. First, your aunt. Her and the family’s dislike for you. Did your mother’s death strictly enforced that or was it always there?” “I don’t know, I can’t remember at least. My childhood has slowly become a blur now. I remember the last time we saw each other, a week before my birthday that flowing year. I was in a Wal-Mart, just hanging with my homeboy, Mike, and I saw Nicole, my mom’s sister. We spoke, she seemed okay. But then something sparked, like a dark cloud came over her. That’s when she said she needed to be honest with me. That ‘my mother never really wanted kids and maybe I was the key problem. A teenage boy is never easy to handle especially with a father like mine’.” “A father like yours?” “He works with the government. So, it’s a lot of late hours and random leaves from the family. It was overwhelming, I won’t lie about that."  "I’ve done my research, you too are an involved in government."  It wasn’t a question, so I shrugged it off.

"What do you believe when it comes to your mother’s death, Kingston? Do you believe it was you, her, or your father?” “I’m not going to sit here and say I was picture perfect. Everyone has their flaws and wrongs. My mother dealt with a lot. I’m sure there’s shit I don’t even know about being so young, but my father is a handful. I know that for myself. I also know, one small thing doesn’t lead someone to shooting themselves in the head. It’s multiple issues, multiple unsettled arguments and problems.”

Chrissie

Christmas Eve and I’m sitting in my office, shoving down a raspberry filled donut and drinking my Fiji water.  I was going on half of a dozen and not once did I feel bad for my naughty dinner.  My teeth may in a few weeks, but for now I wasn’t worried about that. There hours have passed by and I’m still sitting in the same spot as before. No work has been done yet and again; I didn’t care. 

Honestly, this is Olivia’s fault.  

 Since some nights; I’ve been fucked. Figuratively speaking of course, but however, I am. No, I never spoke with Kingston. For as long as my memory serves me right; he hates me. And if it’s not hate than its about him not wanting to be around me. Regardless of why. He kept himself away from me. While also making sure that I also stayed away from him. Overnight the man changed, forced himself to change at least. And being the ‘friend’ that wanted to see him shine; I allowed the pain because I didn’t want to outshine him or dim his lights down. 

 As the weeks turned into months, months turned into years, and years turned into memories. The thought of why; was blocked away. To me, there was no need of wondering why the man stopped wanting to be around me. I had my ideas, but never gave the time to believe them. Olivia says I deserve it to myself to know why. Kingston’s darkest secrets and painful childhood memories are installed into my brain permanently. I thought Liv and I experienced it bad during our childhood days. The man lost his mother to suicide, his family hates him and his father, his father hates him, he hates himself at times, and the only thing that makes him happy now is blood. Kingston hard-shelled exterior, but a jelly interior. My light brown nude painted nails, trailed and ran across the screen of my phone as my body became heavy with emotions. I felt my nose starting to burn, my back arching from anticipation, my eyes watering with fear.  All too much to bear. 

"Kingston Vitale,” My head dropped in a mini-defeat mood at the sound of his voice. “Leave a message."  His voicemail. I knew then it wasn’t worth it. It wasn’t the trouble of trying to fix and figure out. Hell, the man is probably home with his wife and kids playing house. 

What kind of woman would I be to come in between that?

[wheres-mulder]

Alien Baby Daddy Part I

by @haywarde37; Part II + Part III + Part IV + Part V

Another beautiful submission from @haywarde37​. A fairly angsty, while wonderfully written first part of a wonderful, sweet, domestic MSR fic <3

TRIGGER WARNING for miscarriage. THIS FIC CONTAINS A MISCARRIAGE! So do not read more if that’s something you wish to avoid!

In Mulder’s opinion, there is no better way to celebrate your first birthday than with your first sugar-induced coma. Amidst the ruins of wrapping paper and empty gift boxes, his son is stretched out on his stomach, dead to the world. He’s still wearing the green alien party hat he put on him. The alien’s black eyes stare back at Mulder as he lifts William off the floor.

All the guests are gone and Scully and Maggie are slowly cleaning up the carnage. They put Mulder on William duty because he’s the reason the house is such a mess. It’s a task Mulder loves because they get along in a way even Bill Scully Jr. is jealous of.

William curls against Mulder’s chest, yawning contently. He lost his shorts sometime during the party so he’s just in his diaper and a t-shirt that reads Birthday Boy.

“Have either of you seen Party Animal’s pants?”

Scully looks up from the trash bag she’s stuffing with plastic cups and plates and shakes her head. “No. How did he lose his pants?”

“Beats me. He’s a little young to be dropping his pants though, don’t you think?”

William makes a gurgling noise that sounds suspiciously like laughter as Scully glares at him and points to her mother who just emerged from behind the couch with a pair of bright green shorts.

“I found them, Fox.”

Mulder kisses her cheek. “What would we do without you?” It’s an actual question. They’d be lost without Maggie. She’s a saint, taking care of William on the odd days Mulder can’t. He’s a stay-at-home dad now, but on occasion he attends local conventions hosted by believers and that’s not really a place his son, a skeptic, needs to be.

Scully helps Mulder put on the shorts. She’s been glowing all afternoon but she seems to beam a little brighter when she has her baby back in her arms. He knows she loves having her family fawn over William but she loves holding him even more.

“Can you believe it’s been a year since you were air-vacced out of Democrat Hot Springs with this little man? How the time flies.” He pinches William’s doughy cheek. “I still remember the moment I first held you. I was young and fit and you didn’t hurt my back.”

Scully smiles like she knows something Mulder doesn’t. She stands on her tiptoes to reach his ear and whisper, “You have seven months to get your back in shape again.”

He shivers at the feel of her hot breath against his skin. He can’t process her words for a good minute as he tells his dick to stand the hell down but when he does, both Scully and Maggie are laughing.

“Oh, Fox,” Maggie says, wiping away a tear. “I’m surprised it took you this long to make a second one.”

They lose the baby a week later. It happens on an early Sunday morning. Mulder was in the kitchen, trying to soothe a teething William. He’d woken up at three, screaming. Scully was in the bathroom and would stay there for the next two hours.

At five, Mulder had finally gotten William back to sleep. He knocked on the bathroom door to tell Scully.

“You can stop hiding. The monster went back to bed.”

When she didn’t answer, he listened for the sound of dry heaving, thinking morning sickness had finally caught up with her. All he heard was sobbing.

Not being the most rational when it came to his family, Mulder kicked open the door and found Scully hunched over a bloodied pair of underwear. On closer inspection, when he threw the underwear away, he’d find clotting and tissue too. A sight worse than any monster he’d ever encountered.

And that’s why Mulder is now fixing the bathroom door with William in his pack-and-play behind him and Scully nowhere to be found. He assumes she went to see the OBGYN but she didn’t tell him and he didn’t ask.

The rationale part of Mulder’s brain knows miscarriages happen, that the baby wouldn’t have survived on its own because of some chromosomal abnormality, but he just cleaned his child off the floor. He feels sick. He’s already thrown up twice at the memory.

His hands shake as he screws in the new door knob he bought from Home Depot. It’s tarnished silver, a stark contrast from the bronze one he broke. He hopes Scully won’t hate it when she comes homes.

But she doesn’t come home. Three days after she leaves, her side of the bed is still empty so he starts sleeps in William’s room. It’s space themed with asteroids and planets on the walls and mobile of stars over his crib. Painting it was the first thing Mulder did when they moved into the Unremarkable House.

“Your mother will be back soon,” he promises William through the bars of his crib. His son stares at him then holds out a fat fist which Mulder takes between his thumb and forefinger.

“I love you too.” He dozes off, still holding William’s hand. When he wakes up, he assumes it’s because William is fussy, but finds Scully curled against him on the floor. She’s wearing different clothes, a plain t-shirt and jeans that smell new and still have price tags from Wal-Mart yet to be cut off.

“Hey,” she breathes.

“Hey.”

She looks at William, tears prickling at the corners of her eyes. “I’m sorry.” He lets go of William’s hand to hold Scully. He smooths her greasy, unwashed hair and kisses her forehead.

“It’s not your fault, Scully. These things happen.”

“But I left. I left you and William.”

“Scully–”

She presses a finger to his lips, silencing him. “Shhh. Let me talk.” After he nods, she continues.

“I left you and I shouldn’t have. This hurt you too but it reminded me of losing Emily and I just…had to leave.”

Emily. Mulder hasn’t heard that name in years. They only knew her for a brief moment but Scully mourned the loss of her to this day. She lit a candle for her when they went to Christmas Eve Mass and put flowers on her sand-filled grave. It’s only natural that the miscarriage would have brought up the tragedy of losing the child she never had.

He touches her cheek. “Scully, it’s okay. I’m just glad you came back.”

“We’ll get through this, right? We’ve been through worse.”

“Considering you buried me, I think we can survive anything.”

After the miscarriage they see a therapist together. Scully promises it’s a one time thing but the therapist takes an interest in Mulder and he’s soon prescribed twenty milligrams of sertraline. Now he sees a different therapist who specializes in treating PTSD from the loss of a sibling every week.

It’s weird. He’s not used to talking about Samantha to anyone but Scully. The therapist assumes his childhood mind crafted the aliens to deal with the trauma of Samantha’s abduction, saying it’s easier to hate monsters than people and suggest a psychotherapy treatment called Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. He only agrees to it because he’s afraid he’ll be forced to leave William and Scully again if he doesn’t.

But to Mulder’s surprise, it helps. He still believes aliens took his sister (a fact his therapist has learned to accept) but he can think back to the memory without feeling sick. Soon, they work on memories of his father, then his mother and then his time from coming back from the dead to find life had moved on without him.

“It’s amazing what you people of science are capable of,” he tells William while he feeds him Cheerios. “You can find how to take the pain away from the most tragic of memories but you can’t fathom the idea that we might not be alone in the universe.”

William only gurgles and makes grabby-hands at the bowl of Cheerios.

[haught-at-waverly-place]

answer all of them

answers under the cut! only doing this cause im that bored

200: My crush’s name is: no one 199: I was born in: 1996198: I am really: bored197: My cellphone company is: wtf who cares?? 196: My eye color is: green/blue 195: My shoe size is: 6.5194: My ring size is: idk small 193: My height is: smol 192: I am allergic to: cats and all of nature in the spring and summer 191: My 1st car was: an hhr or as i liked to call it a poor mans hearse190: My 1st job was: an in home care taker aka i cleaned elderly peoples homes189: Last book you read: god i dont read188: My bed is: my best friend 187: My pet: is the loml 186: My best friend: she lives too far away tbh 185: My favorite shampoo is: i use old spice 2-in-1 like the basic bitch i am184: Xbox or ps3: ps3??? what year is it the switch is where its mfkin at 183: Piggy banks are: dope af 182: In my pockets: nothing cause im a broke bitch 181: On my calendar: nothing cause im a boring bitch 180: Marriage is: cool good on everyone who is married to their best friends 179: Spongebob can: new spongebob can die cause its garbage 178: My mom: is the best 177: The last three songs I bought were? who buys songs? 176: Last YouTube video watched: air crash investigations (dont ask) 175: How many cousins do you have? idk 174: Do you have any siblings? one sister 173: Are your parents divorced? nah 172: Are you taller than your mom? nah 171: Do you play an instrument? i used to play the violin and guitar but not anymore 170: What did you do yesterday? tried not to die [ I Believe In ]169: Love at first sight: idk maybe? 168: Luck: sure 167: Fate: yeah sure 166: Yourself: hahahahahahahahahahahahaha no 165: Aliens: fuck yeah 164: Heaven: ehhh no 163: Hell: no 162: God: not really 161: Horoscopes: lowkey160: Soul mates: every one has one 159: Ghosts: kind of 158: Gay Marriage: nah why would gays want to get married 157: War: war is p stupid 156: Orbs: wtf is an orb??155: Magic: no [ This or That ]154: Hugs or Kisses: kisses 153: Drunk or High: drunk 152: Phone or Online: online 151: Red heads or Black haired: black 150: Blondes or Brunettes: brunettes 149: Hot or cold: cold 148: Summer or winter: winter 147: Autumn or Spring: autumn 146: Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla 145: Night or Day: night 144: Oranges or Apples: apples 143: Curly or Straight hair: curly 142: McDonalds or Burger King: mcdonalds 141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: this is dark chocolate erasure and i will not stand for it 140: Mac or PC: mac 139: Flip flops or high heals: neither both are garbage for the feet 138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: im already sweet and poor sooooo137: Coke or Pepsi: where is my dr. pepper representation 136: Hillary or Obama: obama 135: Burried or cremated: cremated id like to go out in a burnin glory even if im already dead 134: Singing or Dancing: singing 133: Coach or Chanel: neither 132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: who are you people 131: Small town or Big city: big city 130: Wal-Mart or Target: im a lesbian so target obviously 129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: neither 128: Manicure or Pedicure: pedicure only cause they message my feet and legs 127: East Coast or West Coast: west coast 126: Your Birthday or Christmas: xmas cause snow 125: Chocolate or Flowers: chocolate 124: Disney or Six Flags: disney 123: Yankees or Red Sox: neither who cares about baseball [ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: men bein garbage 121: George Bush: why? 120: Gay Marriage: hell yeah we got it 119: The presidential election: we might as well have elected a crackhead 118: Abortion: let women get them safely so they dont fucking die its that simple117: MySpace: jesus is it 2006 again 116: Reality TV: its trashy but ill watch it cause im trash 115: Parents: love your parents kids (unless they are abusive) 114: Back stabbers: are awful just like maybe dont stab people in the back literally and metaphorically 113: Ebay: ive literally never used ebay in my life 112: Facebook: its p garbage i barely ever use it 111: Work: capitalism has killed workers and quality work 110: My Neighbors: they are there 109: Gas Prices: i havent gotten gas in like 2 months so like idk 108: Designer Clothes: why are they all like so ugly??107: College: stressful and only vaguely worth something 106: Sports: fun to play but boring to watch. i only go to sporting events for the alcohol 105: My family: is v dope and i love them 104: The future: stressful and i hate thinking about it [ Last time I ]103: Hugged someone: last night it was my dad 102: Last time you ate: last night lol 101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: probably back in december with my best friend 100: Cried in front of someone: oooof all the time 99: Went to a movie theater: like 2 wks ago 98: Took a vacation: january i went on a cruise 97: Swam in a pool: last summer i think 96: Changed a diaper: uhhh never…. 95: Got my nails done: god way back in high school when i thought i was straight 94: Went to a wedding: last friday! 93: Broke a bone: 3 wks ago haha 92: Got a peircing: i havent gotten a piercing since i was like 6 91: Broke the law: uhhh i plead the fifth 90: Texted: i texted my mom like 40 mins ago [ MISC ]89: Who makes you laugh the most: myself 88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my dog shes so cute 87: The last movie I saw: spiderman into the spiderverse 86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: a vacation to see my aunt in indiana 85: The thing im not looking forward to: going back to school 84: People call me: uhhh my name? 83: The most difficult thing to do is: rn? pretty much everything 82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: never 81: My zodiac sign is: im a leo 80: The first person i talked to today was: my mom 79: First time you had a crush: first time i remember was freshman yr of college 78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: my mom 77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: i dont remember 76: Right now I am talking to: nobody im a lonely bitch 75: What are you going to do when you grow up: hopefully something to do with neuropsychology 74: I have/will get a job: 73: Tomorrow: wtf does this even mean 72: Today: or this one 71: Next Summer: and this one 70: Next Weekend: and even this one 69: I have these pets: a golden retriever mix 68: The worst sound in the world: 67: The person that makes me cry the most is: hahaha myself 66: People that make you happy: my family and friends 65: Last time I cried: yesterday 64: My friends are: amazing wonderful people that i love 63: My computer is: my lifeline 62: My School: is small but good 61: My Car: is a lesbian wagon that looks like i live in it 60: I lose all respect for people who: cheat on their s/o 59: The movie I cried at was: i dont usually cry during movies 58: Your hair color is: confusing kind of blonde also kind of brown 57: TV shows you watch: she ra, killing eve, grey anatomy too many others to list 56: Favorite web site: youtube 55: Your dream vacation: to go to germany 54: The worst pain I was ever in was: idk maybe my post surgery foot pain 53: How do you like your steak cooked: medium rare the only way a steak should be eaten 52: My room is: always a disaster 51: My favorite celebrity is: taylor swift 50: Where would you like to be: idk 49: Do you want children: noooo 48: Ever been in love: yes i have 47: Who’s your best friend: we aint naming names on here 46: More guy friends or girl friends: girl friends45: One thing that makes you feel great is: playing with my dog 44: One person that you wish you could see right now: A43: Do you have a 5 year plan: god no i dont even have a 5 hour plan 42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: nah 41: Have you pre-named your children: nope40: Last person I got mad at: myself39: I would like to move to: somewhere other than where i am now 38: I wish I was a professional: at being not depressed [ My Favorites ]37: Candy: bottle caps or ritter sports 36: Vehicle: subaru wrx hatchbacks with a wide body kit are b nice 35: President: who tf has a favorite president 34: State visited: oregon or washington 33: Cellphone provider: who has a fave cell provider???32: Athlete: none31: Actor: idk like chris pratt or something 30: Actress: rn jodie comer 29: Singer: hayley williams 28: Band: paramore 27: Clothing store: h&m 26: Grocery store: target 25: TV show: law and order svu 24: Movie: princess mononoke 23: Website: youtube 22: Animal: red panda 21: Theme park: disneyland 20: Holiday: halloween 19: Sport to watch: none they are all hella boring 18: Sport to play: softball 17: Magazine: none i dont read 16: Book: i dont read books cant concentrate for that long 15: Day of the week: idk saturday 14: Beach: ive been to a beach like 3 times and i barely remember them 13: Concert attended: paramore after laughter concert last summer 12: Thing to cook: cooking stresses me the fuck out so i dont have a favorite thing to cook 11: Food: pasta!! 10: Restaurant: uhhh i dont really have one 9: Radio station: its 2019 who listens to the radio 8: Yankee candle scent: i dont really use candles 7: Perfume: i dont wear perfume 6: Flower: peach roses probably 5: Color: red 4: Talk show host: i dont watch talk shows they are all boring 3: Comedian: john mulaney or iliza schlesinger 2: Dog breed: corgi 1: Did you answer all these truthfully? hahahahaha

[pokeanangel]

Remembering..

I remember when I first met you..

I was dating someone else at the time and I was introduced. You were just a guy. In a mall. Playing what you loved. Smh. I never thought anything of it other than I thought you were cute. I nodded and said, “nice to meet you,” and walked away with the boyfriend I had at the time. I never thought anything more than.. He is cute..

Little did I know.. You would be back in my life…

Almost 2 years ago..

We worked together before we started talking. I remember some chats we had outside our workplace.. Numbers were exchanged.. But nothing ever came about.. We would talk about anything and everything. Still, maybe it wasn’t our time. Or maybe.. It was a learning curve for us.. But two years ago. Not to the day… Aug. 23, 2015 I messaged you. I asked, if you wanted to join me and a few friends for karaoke. I had plans on hooking you up with someone. I still feel bad. I mean, I wanted her happy.. I didn’t care about myself.. We didn’t talk that much before.. Who cares right? So, before we ALL went out.. I invited you to dinner. I had just worked a 12hr shift and was running around the entire town doing work. I was hungry and I wanted company. I picked you up at your place and we went to dinner.. Applebees.. We talked and shit. I explained what was going on and how I felt. You told me that you didn’t like her like that… Of course… I felt horrible. Maybe we shouldn’t do this.. But I think that my friend will at least enjoy one night with you. I remember taking you back to your place.. And we went up stairs to talk… After that… I knew I was in for it. Just talking to you made me worry.. I didn’t think anything of it. But I really did think you were cute. If only ppl knew how much I truly loved you. After that night. I think we constantly saw each other. I didn’t want to catch feelings. And I told him that it was happening.. So we backed off from each other. I still wasn’t wanting this thing to end between us. A couple of months went by and next thing you know I’m constantly sick.. I drank a few more times than I should have and was smoking too. I found out I was pregnant. I wasn’t sure how to feel. But I was scared… Scared to have another child. Scared that my oldest would be jealous.. Scared that this was a mistake. Another mistake that I honestly didn’t think I could handle. I didn’t want to be a single mom. I cried.. I cried because I wanted another so badly. But still was scared. I wanted it to be loved so much from both sides of the family.. I told you. It was shock.. It was.. I don’t know what it was but… It is what it is.. I avoided you. I couldn’t help but want to crawl into a hole. You didn’t want to have kids. Then this! I left. I was relieved to just have told you. I just lived life.. I didn’t know what else to do.. I worked long hours away from home. Barely got to see my oldest. Then a month later I went to the OB and I was cramping.. I noticed I was spotting but it didn’t usually mean much. Sometimes it happens. You bleed a little because of implantation. I get to the OB and it got more and more painful.. The OB warned me. I could miscarry because of my HCG levels weren’t raising quickly enough for their liking. I got an ultrasound preformed and what I dreaded.. Had happened. They weren’t very caring. They just sent me on my way. I went to tell you and you just… Were relieved and happy. I mean, I saw you.. I just needed to go.. I got out of my car and told you. I remember looking at you and you just said, it was for the best. You weren’t ready. I completely understood. I wanted to just leave. I’m about to get into my car and your friend calls me over. I really should have left.. But he is your best friend and I figured this would probably be our last encounter. I came up on his deck and we talked. He asked about my pregnancy.. I told him i miscarried. He quickly said his peace on everything with us and moved onto the next item. After that night… I went home crying. I was a mess. Pieces of me were just everywhere. No one understood wtf was wrong with me. I shut down. I hated my job, men, women, just everything. I couldn’t think straight. I still talked to you once in awhile. I honestly didn’t know why. I hated how I felt. I didn’t realize I was hooked on you. You truly were this drug. A drug that shouldn’t be on the streets.. He… IT would be so addictive that it would kill anyone or thing in it’s presence. You think I would have learned my lesson.. However, I did not. I immediately started birth control after the miscarriage. I couldn’t imagine putting myself through another.. I was stressed out and fumbling around with myself. I would talk to you.. I never realized that it would go too far. But this addiction I had.. It overtook me. It stripped me of my entire being! I was so angry.. I wanted to just let my world crumble, but I was also depressed. So, so sad. Do you know what it is like losing something? Something so important that it eats at you because you know you lost it? Because.. Losing a baby… Even tho it may have been so small.. Microscopic.. It’s still a baby in a person’s eyes.. Its crushing for someone that had wanted something so badly. Never wanted to feel that crushing pain again. So, birth control it was! On the mini pill. Ugh. It sucked. Why not the ring or shot or whatever? Because the hormones messed me up so bad.. I thought it was bad before.. Ugh Horrible after everything except this stupid mini pill. I remember seeing you.. I had gone shopping with your sister for Christmas after this.. Situation… I remember going to your place and hanging out with you. I handed it over.. A journal.. Zelda.. Nothing special, at least, I thought.. Ya know… To this day I really don’t know if it was important to you. Of course, you seemed to like it. We sat there talked.. I remember thinking I should probably just leave. We talked more.. The rest was a blur. I remember waking up after our round of..fun.. And getting dressed and leaving. I think I went home then work.. It was awkwardly warm out. I can’t remember much. I feel like I blocked out that month.. On Dec 28th I was in Stephen City, VA. The Wal-Mart. I was walking into a store.. And I got sick! Threw up into a storm drain.. I just had a sip of coffee. I love coffee. I didn’t think anything of it. Then I realized… I had been sick feeling for a couple of weeks.. The last time I saw you was two and a half weeks prior.. I had my period the beginning of that month. I ran to pharmacy and grabbed a test. I kept saying.. I couldn’t be. I don’t need this. I’m so scared. I panicked. I paid for it Then ran to the bathroom. It was faint, but it was positive. Have you ever stopped one day and truly watched one of those ‘Clearblue’ commercials? How the women that had that positive outcome.. Were happy and in tears and the other half was smiling? Then you look at me.. At mine.. Sheer fear. I went and got two more.. Kept one for the following morning. They all came back positive. I remember just sitting there.. Not happy.. Definitely cry.. But they weren’t tears of joy. I stopped drinking and smoking. I made sure that if this was going to be a full term baby.. That I will be as healthy as I can be. I remember having to tell you over the phone that I was pregnant. That I am keeping it and regardless of how you felt.. I wanted to just not go through this empty feeling again. It’s not something that’s unfamiliar, but I’d be damned to feel it. I tried so hard to keep myself safe. I just remember going to see you some time on the 31st.. And you asking me to be your girlfriend.. I thought you were joking. *rolls eyes* I truly wish you were looking back. It was the 31st. New Year’s Eve.. I came by to talk to you about things. To rationalize myself in doing this on my own.. And you said.. Yeah.. Be my girlfriend. *blink* ‘do you wanna be mine?’ I think were your words.. I remember saying.. Something like.. My son is my life and chris is his dad.. But it all stopped because you kissed me. That was it. Sealed everything with a kiss. We officially started dating. I was elated, to be honest. We went to his friend’s house and it was a party.. You introduced me to everyone as, “this is Alex, my girlfriend,” we acted like we were teenagers or something. Careless a bit, too. It was all in fun. I remember when midnight came.. We welcomed the new year together as a couple. With an itty bitty on the way.. Little did I know.. We wouldn’t make it a whole year.. This is my letter to you. You may not even read it. Maybe you will? I really don’t know nor care enough to dwell. I wrote this thinking I would get closure. I still haven’t gotten any. I still have those stale tears on my tank top from when I started this 'letter.’ You taught me that… Even if I did everything right in a relationship. Even with a few fuck ups on the way.. That anyone could leave me. I gave you my heart. Literally, placed it into your hands. And you held it. Crushed it.. Spit on it.. Then decided that when you were all done you could just slowly piece it back together. Possibly with apologies? Or meaningless kisses on my cheeks.. Heartless whispers into my ears. Knowing that I still loved you. Because loving you was a huge feat for me.. I never cared about your past. I worried about our future. Our child and my older son. I wanted to conquer the world with you. Side by side. Like evil villains. We were this fucked up couple that totally got each other, but no one got us. We did stupid things together, and if we were separate.. We could read each other’s minds. It was so liberating I hadn’t had anyone like that in my life.. Ever. No one. I thought that being this duo… This couple.. We could take on the world. Together. Forever. We would sit and look at things and just know what to say.. What you would say.. Or I actually wanted to learn DDR. And to this day I want to. You promised you’d teach me.. I hope you stick around. Mainly for your son. I want you there for me, but that’s just my hope that you would come back. Begging to stay the night with me. To move back 'home’ and to sleep next to you every night… I would be so happy. Happy. I can’t believe you did this to me.. I was whole without you.. I was a complete person before you. And I fell into these.. Sharp jagged pieces of myself! I don’t hate you. I don’t! But I can’t fully trust anyone with my heart. It’s been six months and you have yet to even say something about our relationship, because… It’s who you are! Because I know that stupid conversation by heart. Because we couldn’t be adults about it.. It had to be petty. I think I cried more over you than most know. I’m pretty sure my best friend thinks that I’m hopeless! Yeah, so what? Maybe I am! Maybe.. I’m stupid and told myself that on a day like today he’ll come around and say, 'I’m sorry,’ but 'sorry’ won’t be enough by then.. I really want to be happy. Having a family was my happiness. My goals in life were to have a family whether it be broken or whole.. I just didn’t want it to be without my sidekick. I’m still lost. I wake up in the morning hoping for a text… Or maybe a phone call..? I truly don’t know anymore. All I want right now is to forget this feeling. Because this feeling I have inside me… I wish it was dead. So I never have to feel it again. And I try to not have these feelings. I work rather hard on not feeling them.. I don’t even get it. I just want it to be gone. If I could stop loving you! But every single time I see you. Whether it is a picture.. Text.. Call.. These feelings come back. And in full force. Damn you.

[brokestminimalist]

Tis the Season...

...for stress, suicide, and heart attacks.

Listen up.  Christmas is December 25th, every single year.  It doesn't sneak up behind you like a mugger in a dark alley.  It's never a surprise.  You can't possibly forget when it is.  Since that is the case, there is no excuse for anyone to be shopping for Christmas gifts on the 24th.  Or the 23rd, for that matter. Or that entire week, in fact. Christmas Eve is a day that you should be spending with your family and friends, cooking, playing games, reading together, wrapping gifts, etc.  You should not be at a store.  You should not be spending money, because if you're like us you can't afford it.  You should not be contributing to the commercialization of what is otherwise a deeply meaningful holiday. You should not be imposing on retail workers, who are forced to spend this time away from their own families, just because you are a disorganized failure of a human who can't be bothered to take care of your shopping at a reasonable time.  Get your crap together before the very last minute like a real adult.  (Yeah, that's right.  We know you've just been fake adulting all this time.)

We, unfortunately, are that retail worker.  We spent Christmas Eve behind a customer service desk, getting yelled at by people who waited until the very last minute to buy This Year's Big Thing and were angry that we were out of it.  On Christmas Eve.  Of course we are out of it. It's Christmas Eve. You should be at home with your kids, not harassing poor retail drones who have no control over stock and just want to get off our feet and have Christmas dinner.  We did not get to see our families.  We did not get to play Dirty Santa or eat any pie or see Great Uncle Jim, who might not be around for that many more Christmases.   We didn't get to watch the Peanuts special with the kids, because we were too busy taking care of these materialistic, inconsiderate sheeple who think that they need to rush out at the last minute to buy a bunch of stuff to impress relatives they see once a year or less.

Because that's what it's about, really.  They aren't buying three hundred dollars worth of name brand toys and clothes out of the goodness of their hearts, they are doing it out of the obligation that Christmas creates.  They aren't buying gifts because Jesus commanded them to care for the poor, they are just fulfilling an expectation.  They are spending money so that the rest of the family won't think less of them.  And they're going into debt.  At least half are making these purchases on credit cards, which they will spend the next several months paying down.  The gifts themselves will likely get played with for a few days and then put aside or quickly broken.  Next year, the cycle will begin again. Obligation, debt, disuse.  Meanwhile, pressure increases every year along with stress.  Kids don't just get one gift from Santa, they get twenty. Parents work more hours so they can afford it. Heart attacks and depression rates skyrocket.

Is it worth it? Of course not. Stress literally shortens your life.  Is your sister going to remember what you got her this year in ten years?  No.  Are your kids?  Certainly not. What do you remember from when you were a kid?  Is it the presents themselves, or is it the feeling of Christmas?  Seriously.  They're going to remember sitting by the tree with family, they're going to remember playing with their cousins, baking cookies with grandma, and making snow angels with the neighbor kids.  We don't remember what we got for Christmas when we were ten, but we remember sliding down a snow-covered hill on a trash can lid with our brother.  We remember making our own ornaments for the tree and leaving out milk and cookies for Santa.  We remember a pancake breakfast on Christmas morning, making s’mores in the fireplace, and talking on the phone to relatives who lived across the country. Mostly we remember the anticipation, the warmth, the closeness, rather than the toys or clothes we got and quickly broke or outgrew.

The solution is simple.  Just stop.  Don't be a commercial Christmas gift giver.   Be creative, but don't go shopping and don't spend an excessive amount of money.  Think about the person this gift is for, and tailor it to them.  Give IOU's for a chore like babysitting, grass cutting, or house cleaning.  Give out items that you sewed or baked.  Give out plants that you've grown, especially cooking herbs. Get together with other family members and start a college fund for the newest baby. Gather favorite recipes from the oldest generation and collect them into booklets for the one that’s coming of age. Make jars of sugar scrub.  Get one of your grandparents to sit with a voice recorder and tell stories from their childhood, then give copies to everyone. Teach a teenager how to drive or how to cook, something that they'll take with them and use for the rest of their lives. Sign the little kids up for library cards.  Make candles or soaps.  Make your own cards to go with them.  And don't start in December!  Start early, get your projects going, and spend December enjoying your home and your family instead of fluorescent lights and crowded parking lots.

This is supposed to be the season of giving, so give! Give your time, your knowledge, or your skills.  Give the product of your hobbies.  And if you have been too busy or too broke for even those, then give a cozy morning with family. Give an old movie while drinking hot chocolate. Give a drive around town to check out the best Christmas lights. Give a game of catch or an afternoon building a snowman or a funny story by the fireplace.  Give advice.  Give hugs.  You can be generous without things and without money.  Get into the spirit of a minimalist holiday and drag your friends and family along with you. If they get mad at the lack of material items, you should probably get new friends.

A few other things, before we go.

We here at Brokest Minimalist don't actually give or accept Christmas gifts, as a general rule.  This is kind of extreme, but it works for us.  We spread the word far and wide that we don't want things, and we don't buy things for people.  Instead, we make homemade cards every year to send out. We put in bits of poetry, our own drawings, and handfuls of glitter.  Why?  We want to acknowledge the season and wish others well for the start of the new year, but we don't want to contribute to the obligation/debt/disuse cycle and we don't want to encourage our loved ones to do the same.  If we wind up attending an event, we bring a batch of brownies or pumpkin butter along as tribute.  We do not bring individual gifts, nor do we spend a single minute of our time shopping or looking at advertisements or giving any shits what the latest and greatest thing is.  We do not have holiday stress, except as it is forced onto us by excessive traffic or having to spend three hours in line at Wal-Mart just to buy a loaf of bread or some dog food because everyone else and their mom is there trying to get last-minute gifts that they put about three seconds of thought into.

This is difficult for our family.  Some people understood right away, but a few still don't get it.  One relative still mails us a present every year, even though she lives in town, because she knows we won't go to her house to get it.  We usually thank her politely and donate it to charity after the first of the year.  If you would like to go truly gift-free, we recommend letting your family know well in advance and being prepared for confusion.  If some continue to give you gifts anyway, accept them graciously and then donate them when you get a chance.  Or, tell them that they may give you gifts that are consumable, such as food, candy, hygiene products, candles, etc. Stuff that can get used up, in other words, and won't linger around your house attracting more clutter.  Or, tell them to donate to a charity in your name. (An exception is if you have little kids. Please have a few things for them to unwrap on Christmas morning if that's what they are used to.  It's likely that they won't understand and their upset will ruin the day for both them and you.  Let them unwrap a few presents and then distract them with games, delicious food, and visits with family.)

If someone you know is going minimalist and refusing to exchange gifts, please accept this and don't argue with them about it. Don't assume it's because of money, though it may be in part.  Don't feel sorry for them for the lack of gifts (although you can be sorry if they miss Christmas with your family because they were forced to work instead). Send them a card, give them a call, and wish them luck with their project.  When you buy someone a gift while knowing they don't want you to, you aren't doing them a favor.  You aren't doing something nice, you're giving them stress and guilt and an implied obligation to pay you back for your kindness.  So don't do it. Take them at their word, wish them well, and go on with your life.  

We know this post is a little late in the game.  If you have spent this season stressing out, shopping, going into debt, or otherwise doing things you don't want to do, spend today and tomorrow relaxing. Spend time with your family.  Have a hot bath, a cup of hot chocolate, an extra slice of pie.  Do some yoga, breathe deeply, and let it go.  You don't ever have to do this again.  There is a way out, and you can begin the process as soon as Boxing Day dawns.  Next year can be different; you can make it so.

Merry Christmas, Festivus, Kwanzaa, and a belated Happy Hannukah to everyone.  If none of those holidays suit you, we wish you peace, love and ice cream anyway.  

Links: simple Christmas links from becomingminimalist, sugar scrub recipe

[matthew-lombardi-blog]

Nowhere to Run || Matt + Brook

@itsbrookscarter

The holidays were normally a chaotic time for Matt. The pizzeria was typically busier than usual, and many of his employees took time off, forcing him to work more hours to cover their shifts. On top of that, Christmas was a huge affair for the Lombardi’s. Between all the cooking he’d helped his mother with and the last-minute trips to the mall to get gifts for everyone on his list, it seemed as if he’d hardly been able to get a moment to himself. If that wasn’t enough stress, the party he threw on New Year’s Eve certainly did the trick. As much of a success it was, playing the host was exhausting, and he was still recovering from all of the holiday festivities.

And somewhere in between all of the parties and the gift-giving, Matt had found time to not only get into a prolonged fight with his best friend, but also managed to confuse the shit out of himself and his ex-girlfriend. The kisses they’d shared at the holiday event were completely unexpected, yet enjoyable. It muddled his emotions, brought back memories he’d tried so hard to forget. Now, they were at the forefront of his brain. But maybe, just maybe, they could just forget about it, pretend it never happened and go back to ignoring each other like they’d been doing for the past year or so.

Matt’s fridge had been empty for the past week, yet he had been too lazy to make the necessary trip to the grocery store. His mind was still seemingly stuck on holiday mode. And that was why, today, he’d dragged himself to Wal-Mart, in desperate need of restocking his kitchen. He’d just finished grabbing the last couple of ingredients he needed to make dinner that night, and he was finishing up his trip to the store with a visit to the alcohol aisle, searching for the perfect beer to complement the tacos he was making. And that’s when he spotted her, her blonde hair and glasses giving her away instantly. He debated on just casually sneaking away, in case she hadn’t even seen him in the first place, but another part of him didn’t want to go, and that was the part that won. He pushed his cart in her direction, putting on a polite smile and offering a slight chuckle. “Of all the places I’d run into you, of course it’d be the alcohol aisle.”

[flowercrownfreddie]

aLL THE QUESTIONS

i just answered every third one for nadia, but it didn’t post, and now i’m sad. 

1. Would you have sex with the last person you text messaged?- no that would be weird 

2. You talked to an ex today, correct?- no 

3. Have you taken someones virginity?- i have not

4. Is trust a big issue for you?- not really, it depends on the person 

5. Did you hang out with the person you like recently?- yea

6. What are you excited for?- nothing really 

7. What happened tonight?- i had dinner, talked with my boyfriend’s sister, then i called my mum 

8. Do you think it’s disgusting when girls get really wasted?- no??? 

9. Is confidence cute?- very 

10. What is the last beverage you had?- tap water 

11. How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?- dunno??? at the top of my mind i would say nicklas and your brother

12. Do you own a pair of skinny jeans?- several 

13. What are you gonna do Saturday night?- celebrate @optimisticfairyprincess‘s birthday 

14. What are you going to spend money on next?- probably a gift for @optimisticfairyprincess 

15. Are you going out with the last person you kissed?- yea 

16. Do you think you’ll change in the next 3 months?- nah, i’m pretty content with myself. i should probably get a bit healthier tho 

17. Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?- probably @optimisticfairyprincess, @luminarai, @deresbabyh, and you. but i’m pretty comfortable talking to most people

18. The last time you felt broken?- christmas eve 

19. Have you had sex today?- nope 

20. Are you starting to realize anything?- nay 

21. Are you in a good mood?- not really

22. Would you ever want to swim with sharks?- nah

23. Are your eyes the same color as your dad’s?- yup 

24. What do you want right this second?- nachos 

25. What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy?- depends on the situation, but i’d probably get pretty hurt if my boyfriend kissed another girl

26. Is your current hair color your natural hair color?- surprisingly yes ??? i miss colouring my hair 

27. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh?- sure, there’s a lot of other positive qualities in a person 

28. What was the last thing that made you laugh?- don’t trust the bitch in apartment 23 

29. Do you really, truly miss someone right now?- my mum 

30. Does everyone deserve a second chance?- no. most people, but not everyone 

31. Honestly, do you hate the last boy you were talking to?- no. there’s few people i hate that i talk to 

32. Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do?- yes 

33. Are you one of those people who never drinks soda?- no

34. Listening to?- Rachel Platten’s album “Wildfire”. you should listen to it. 

35. Do you ever write in pencil anymore?- yes. last time? today. 

36. Do you know where the last person you kissed is?- yes, beside me playing wow 

37. Do you believe in love at first sight?- no, i don’t believe you can truly love someone without knowing them 

38. Who did you last call?- my mum 

39. Who was the last person you danced with?- @luminarai and @optimisticfairyprincess at new years eve. but to be honest: i dance a LOT on my own/in front of my friends 

40. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed?- dunno, because i wanted to? 

41. When was the last time you ate a cupcake?- i have no idea 

42. Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today?- no but i talked with my mum for over an hour on the phone 

43. Ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush?- my life is an embarrassment 

44. Do you tan in the nude?- nope 

45. If you could, would you take back your last kiss?- nah that would be rude 

46. Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night?- no 

47. Who was the last person to call you?- my boyfriend’s dad 

48. Do you sing in the shower?- always 

49. Do you dance in the car?- sometimes 

50. Ever used a bow and arrow?- the kids ones yes. and a homemade one when i was a child 

51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?- ... 2013??? 

52. Do you think musicals are cheesy?- yes. and i love them a LOT

53. Is Christmas stressful?- meh, depends on who you’re spending it with 

54. Ever eat a pierogi?- nay 

55. Favorite type of fruit pie?- apple 

56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?- i truly wanted to be a princess. or a lawyer because i heard they earned a lot of money 

57. Do you believe in ghosts?- i used to 

58. Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?- all the time 

59. Take a vitamin daily?- yup, iron 

60. Wear slippers?- never

61. Wear a bath robe?- never 

62. What do you wear to bed?- nothing but underpants 

63. First concert?- i can’t remember, D-A-D probably 

64. Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart?- dunno, never been to one. but i would probably LOVE target 

65. Nike or Adidas?- adidas 

66. Cheetos Or Fritos?- neither 

67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?- peanuts

68. Favorite Taylor Swift song?- i knew you were trouble (same as yours ...) 

69. Ever take dance lessons?- yes

70. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?- he can do him, as long as he’s doing something 

71. Can you curl your tongue?- yea

72. Ever won a spelling bee?- never even been to one 

73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy?- yea, i cry over everything, as long as it’s in a tv show or film 

74. What is your favorite book?- perks of being a wallflower 

75. Do you study better with or without music?- it depends. right now i’m very into icelandic music because i can’t understand what they’re saying 

76. Regularly burn incense?- i do not

77. Ever been in love?- yes 

78. Who would you like to see in concert?- the all-american rejects and/or fall out boy and/or marianas trench 

79. What was the last concert you saw?- Passenger

80. Hot tea or cold tea?- hot???? 

81. Tea or coffee?- coffee

82. Favorite type of cookie?- chocolate chip 

83. Can you swim well?- no 

84. Can you hold your breath without holding your nose?- yes ???? 

85. Are you patient?- very 

86. DJ or band, at a wedding?- i want a band, but a dj is probably cheaper 

87. Ever won a contest?- several 

88. Ever have plastic surgery?- no i’m 22

89. Which are better black or green olives?- they are both the worst 

90. Opinions on sex before marriage?- you do you

91. Best room for a fireplace?- wherever there’s a chimney 

92. Do you want to get married?- yes