#wade made this one as a gift for logan by the way

[insert-this-fire]

Can I request dating headcanons for poly Deadpool and Wolverine with gn s/o please?

I’m going to assume its based off of the deadpool and wolverine movie and not other content the two are in.

Poly relationship between deadpool x gn!reader x wolverine, movie verse.

It would be hard to tell when the three of you started dating. 

Logan and Wade were already toeing the line, when you were added it just sort of pushed things over the edge. 

None of you really realize you’re dating till Wade’s ex, Vanessa, says something.

Nicknames! We all know Wade is big on nicknames. You’d get really dumb ones, like chicken nuggets, honey butter biscuits. His favorite would be butter or jelly if you’re with Logan. That way it would be peanut butter or peanut and jelly and he’s the bread.

Logan isn’t big on nicknames though, he mostly calls you by name, the generic sweetheart or darlin’. Probably has a third nickname for you based on your looks or name like he did with the x-men. He doesn’t use it often due to the sudden self loathing he feels.

Be ready to always have someone's hand on you, or one of them touching you. Logan more often than Wade actually. 

Logan is always beside you when the three of you are out, he’s gotta protect his partners. He knows Wade can handle himself, but you? Even if you can he will jump in front of you or sneer at anyone he deems a threat.

Logan may not be that physically affectionate with Wade, but he spends a lot of time with him, even if he seems annoyed you always spot that small little smile and soft look in his eyes.

Logans main love language is quality time. Wade’s is acts of service surprisingly. At first you would think Logan’s was acts of service, he always seemed to be that sort of guy. Wade you thought would be words of affirmation due to how much he talks or gift giving. Nope, he likes to do things for you. Might not be great at fixing the holes in your home he has made, but he sure can make up for it by making you some microwaved chimichangas. 

Some say that you’re the glue keeping the three of you together. They’re wrong. Wade is. 

If you and Logan are fighting, Wade is right there ready to throw down with Logan if he’s in the wrong, or annoy the shit out of you if you were. 

Both men are emotionally constipated in different ways, trying to go on dates without something going wrong is rare, but you wouldn’t change it for the world.

If you are upset, the two of them try their best to cheer you up. They’re really bad at it.

God forbid you’re physically hurt though. You either get babied or the two of them don’t realize how physically hurt you are due to their healing factors.

When Wade is hurt though, around you, he likes to play it up. If he isn’t having one of his bad days. Logan though likes to make sure you don’t see it.

I hope you know how to cook, these boys don’t, if you don’t, well… y’all order lots of take out then.

if you're gnc it takes Logan a long time to understand it, Wade gets it right away. But at least they're trying?

[drac0line1nn1t]

Part 1 | Part 2

[happy74827]

Feels Like Home

[Logan Howlett x Female!Reader]

Synopsis: You decide to take it upon yourself to become best friends with Wade’s new grumpy addition to the family (much to Logan’s dismay).

WC: 2453

Category: Fluff, Sunshine!Reader x Grumpy!Logan trope {TW: Bar Fight, Handsy Drunk Dude, Mentions of Blood + Bruising}.

[Dedicated to: @iluvloganhowlett] I finished it for you!! (I’m shocked at the speed too don’t worry 💀). Hopefully this fluffiness will help add onto the low supply out there.

And incase anyone hasn’t seen it yet: DEADPOOL & WOLVERINE SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT

『••✎••』

You’ve always had a keen eye when it came to others. It’s mostly why you and Wade get along so well; you’re the one person who can see straight through him. And while it means you are very close, it also meant that you can easily tell when something is going on with someone you don't know that well, like the tall, brooding man named Logan, who had just joined the club of misfits.

You could tell by the way he carried himself that he had been through hell and back. He was quiet, grumpy, and had a tendency to snap at Wade, which, most of the time, was a well-deserved snapping.

You could also tell that there was more to him. He wasn't just a grumpy guy; there was something about him that made you want to be his friend. Maybe it was the sadness in his eyes, or maybe it was how lonely he looked.

Either way, you knew he was in need of a good friend, and you wanted to be that friend. Not a pestering one like Wade, but the kind of friend that just makes you feel a bit better.

So, when you spotted him, downing glass after glass of whiskey for the third day in a row, you just knew you had to help.

And he hated it. Oh, man, he absolutely hated it. You were such a happy ray of sunshine, always smiling, always laughing. He found it so fucking annoying. He couldn't deal with you and your constant positivity. It was like you were the PG-13 version of the breathing ballsack next to you.

But you wouldn't give up. Every time you saw him, you would try to cheer him up by making silly jokes, giving him small gifts, or even just sending him encouraging smiles.

He didn't want any of it, but it seemed you were too stubborn to listen. Every small note you’d given him was left crinkled in the trash; every gift was placed away without ever being touched. Your smile never got a response.

That is, until one day, as you walked by him, he mumbled something that almost made you trip over.

"Thanks."

You stopped in your tracks and turned around to face him, a look of disbelief on your face. You had tried so hard to cheer him up for the past few weeks, and this was the only thing you got from him? You couldn't believe it.

You had spent so much time and effort trying to make him feel better, and this was all he could say to you?

You wanted to hug him. To scream to the skies and celebrate that he finally accepted your kindness.

You held the restraint to do so, though. You didn’t want to cause him to close off again, and so instead, you sent him a soft smile, and a small nod, before you resumed walking (running) to your friends.

The next day, however, you were met with the biggest surprise of your life.

Logan was sitting at the bar, drinking. He didn't look too different, still dressed in his trademark blue jeans and flannel shirt, but his face was still holding that sadness you had grown used to seeing on him.

You walked over to him and sat down beside him, that classic smile of yours plastered on your face.

"Hi!"

He groaned. "You're not going to leave me alone, are you?"

"Nope!" You replied cheerfully, popping the 'p.'

He grumbled under his breath and downed the last of his drink, signaling to the bartender for another.

"Come on, Wolvie," you said, nudging his shoulder. "Lighten up. Life's not that bad, is it?"

He turned to glare at you, his dark brown eyes piercing into yours. "It's Logan," he said, his voice a low growl.

You shrugged and leaned closer to him, propping your elbow on the counter. This was the usual part—the part where he would give vocal responses while you carried on your one-sided conversation with him.

The difference this time, the surprise of it all, was when a person approached the both of you. Mind you, a very drunk person.

"Heyyyyy, baby girl," he slurred, his hand landing on your shoulder.

You turned to him, and he was looking you up and down with that gaze you knew had only one intention. You still smiled, though, and politely moved his hand off your shoulder.

"Uh, hi?" You answered unsurely.

He slammed his elbow on the counter, his palm on his fist. "You are gorgeous," he commented, and you had to hold back the laughter that was bubbling in your throat.

"Thank you," you chuckled.

Logan scoffed, rolling his eyes, but you paid him no mind. Usual behavior from him, nothing new.

"No, really," the stranger continued, moving his arm around your shoulders, "I think you're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

"Well, I'm glad you think so," you answered, still chuckling. "But, I think you're a little drunk."

"Drunk on love," he responded, "Say, wanna get out of here? I'll show you a real good time."

Here comes the awkward part, you thought.

You shook your head, and removed his arm from around your shoulders. "Thank you for… uh, the kind offer," you answered, "But, no, thank you."

You expected him to shrug it off and leave or to just be a dick, as many drunken guys are. But no, this guy did not know how to take a hint.

Instead, he tightened his grip around you and pulled you closer to him, his free hand moving down your waist. "Come on, baby," he said, his words slurring. "You know you want to."

You sighed. You were really hoping it wouldn't have to come to this.

You were about to speak, to politely, yet firmly, tell him to leave you alone, but before you could open your mouth, a gruff voice beat you to it.

"She said no,"

He didn’t even look at the man or you. His eyes were still fixated on the counter as if he was talking to his glass, but he had turned his head a bit to the side so that you could hear him clearly.

The drunk stranger was startled by the sudden intervention. He let go of you and looked over at Logan, confusion clear in his face.

"Who the hell are you?" he asked, his brows furrowed.

"Does it matter?" Logan grumbled.

"Yeah, it does," the stranger retorted, his slurring voice suddenly getting serious. "If I'm gonna be having fun, I don't want an audience."

Oh, how you hated confrontations.

Logan just scoffed with a slight hint of a smile, shaking his head as he still refused to turn around.

"Trust me, pal," he replied, "I ain't interested in watching you do anything."

"Good." He went back to his obnoxious grin, now directing his attention back to you. Oh, man, he was an eyesore.

"So, how about it, beautiful? Wanna head somewhere else?" He slurred.

You were about to reply, again, with a polite rejection, but your shoulder was being grabbed at again, and if it wasn’t for the small training session that Colossus had put you through, you were sure you would have lost your footing.

"Can you let go of me, please?" You asked politely, but the man was a brick wall.

"Nah, sweetheart," he shook his head, and the movement was so intense, you could almost hear the alcohol sloshing around in his head, "You're comin' with me. Trust me, you’ll be perfectly taken care of."

That was when the sound of glass slamming against the counter reached your ears, and you didn't have to see the source of the sound to know it was Mr. Grumps.

What you struggled for what seemed like an eternity, he took that needy arm away from your shoulders within a fraction of a second. It was almost shocking how quick he was, but then again, you knew what he was capable of.

With you safe against the counter, Logan turned to face the stranger, his face still showing that same neutral expression as before, though his eyes held an intensity that made the man flinch.

Normal people would believe he had the patience of a saint. But you weren’t a normal person. You knew this was dangerously close to making him lose it.

"Uh, Logan… maybe we should—"

But your words fell on deaf ears. The only thing that Logan could hear was the weak excuses the guy was trying to give as he tried to pull his hand from the tight grasp Logan had it in.

"Hey, man," he stuttered, his words slurring as the panic set in, "What’s your problem? Let go of me!

But Logan had no intentions of doing so. He held the stranger's arm firmly, his grip growing tighter until he could hear a small crack coming from the guy's bones.

"What's your damage, huh?" the guy continued, trying his best to keep his voice from breaking. "It's just a little fun, right, baby?"

You cringed as his eyes fell back onto you, and the pleading tone of his voice was beginning to make your skin crawl.

"Look, uh," you started, looking anywhere but his eyes, "I don't think—"

"Listen," the man continued, and your eyes fell shut. God, he was just not going to stop. "Maybe you can join us? Huh, big boy? That’s what it is, right? You want her all for yourself?"

Uh, oh.

"Logan, don’t—"

It was too late. He had already snapped, and with a grunt, he pulled the man closer to him, his other hand forming a fist around his shirt.

"Wanna say that again?" He growled. "Do it. I dare you."

The man was trembling in his grasp, but he was clearly too drunk to understand the danger he was in.

"Oh, I'm sorry, are you her boyfriend?" He taunted, and the fact that he had the guts to do so while his hand was in a painful hold was astonishing, even for you. "Or are you just some guy with a crush? Cause, honestly, it's pretty pathetic. You can't even ask her out."

His words had Logan seeing red, and before you could do anything, the guy was pushed away and was about to be on the receiving end of one of the strongest punches you've ever seen.

So, riskily, to protect yourself and him from being thrown out of his favorite place, you jumped off the stool and slid in between them as he launched his punch, just stopping inches away from your face.

"Please," you said, your palms up and in front of you, as if that would do anything to stop the rage he was feeling, "Please, calm down."

"Calm down?" He repeated, his voice rising. "Are you kidding me?"

"You need to let it go," you told him. "He's drunk, Logan. He doesn't know what he's saying."

"And, what," he retorted, his anger slowly fading away, "Does it look like I give a single fuck about that?"

You sighed, your eyes meeting his, and that was enough for him to finally give in. His clenched fist dropped, and he released a frustrated sigh.

The dude behind you started laughing, his voice sounding as if he was trying to make fun of a fight scene.

"So," he chuckled, "That's it, huh? You're not gonna do shit? You’re just as pathetic as a—"

He gently moved you aside, and in an instant, the man was lying on the floor with a bloody nose, a black eye, and a few broken ribs.

You could only hold your head in your hands, knowing very well the mess you were about to have to deal with.

And it didn't take long.

As soon as Logan stepped away from the drunk idiot, security was on him, grabbing his arms and restraining him. He couldn’t care less, though, as he held a sadistic grin on his face, pleased with his work while being escorted out.

And, so, there, the two of you were on the steps of the apartment building. You, holding your hands in your lap, and he, staring up at the night sky.

The air was warm, the city lights were dim, and the sky was covered in clouds. There was an odd silence between the two of you, which wasn’t really all that odd, but the events of the night had changed the atmosphere.

"Thanks," you spoke, breaking the quiet. "For, you know, standing up for me."

"He was a douche," he stated, his voice gruff. "Someone had to send that fucktart crying home to mommy."

"You shouldn’t have done that, though," you told him. "Now, you’re probably banned from the bar. I know it's your favorite."

"Eh," he shrugged, "Booze is booze. There are plenty more places to get drunk."

You didn't respond. Instead, you focused your attention on the small bugs flying around the dim light next to the door.

"You shouldn't be thanking me, anyway," he continued, turning to you. That was new. "I should be the one thanking you."

You looked at him, your brows furrowed. This whole conversation was getting weird. "Uh, what for?" You asked, confused.

"For putting up with me," he replied, shrugging.

"Putting up with you?" You repeated, not understanding. "I don't understand."

"Y'know," he continued, his gruff voice a little less gruff. "Sticking around. Being friendly. Having… patience. I can be…I can be a real dick. Honestly, I still don't get why you keep trying."

The smile that found its way to your lips waa the most genuine one he's ever seen. Your eyes were full of kindness and understanding, and your lips, which usually held a grin or a smirk, were turned upwards in a soft, gentle smile.

"Logan," you said, your voice low. "You may be a grump, and you might not be the friendliest guy, but that doesn't mean you don't deserve kindness. Everyone deserves that… or at least a little bit of it."

He scoffed. "That's funny," he replied, turning his head away.

You furrowed your brows and cocked your head, confused. "What is?" You asked.

"I used to think," he began, "That no one would ever look at me in the way you do. Not after what I’ve done… not after what I am."

"You're a good man, Logan," you told him. "You proved who you were when you willingly helped Wade."

"Maybe," he sighed, his gaze meeting yours. "But, there's still a lot you don't know about me. I'm not exactly a knight in shining armor."

"Oh, my dear, Wolvie," you said playfully, leaning closer to him and placing your palm on his shoulder, "You never were."

[icarusredwings]

Thinking about Wade's life and his mental health issues a lot, and I just thought about this. Not only being abused, but his entire brain being made out of cancer, and the fact that oxygen was physically taken from his brain over the course of 2+ days multiple times?

We see him coloring a lot and claim multiple times that he doesn't/ can't read (this is probably a bit, I guarantee he can read), but it had me thinking what if some days were more childish then others as part of his coping mechanisms?

At first, Logans was really confused about why Althea puts up with it until he realizes that it's extremely good for him to just... be taken care of? Praised and given affection for the bare minimum? He thinks it's weird. This wasn't the same man he was fighting with yesterday.

Coming into the living room, he sees Wade sprawled out with crayons and markers all around him with multiple pictures already coloured, his notebook having pages ripped out of it as he kicks his feet and hums.

On the tv, there are cartoons playing. Once in a while, he'll look up at the tv and then go back to coloring. "What are you doing??"

"Hi wolvie. 'm colouring."

"He's behaving, so don't ruin it." Al says. There's pictures by her, and she is holding a box of cereal.

"O..kay??" Sitting down, he's almost too curious to just walk away, picking up puppins so she doesn't ruin his drawings, petting her confusedly.

Sometimes, Al will hold out some cereal in her hand. "Wade." And he will see him shimmy over and take the cereal. "Thank you."

"You're welcome, baby."

As hes scooting back to his color spot he stops and watches the tv for a bit longer then usual.

"...What.. the fuck." Logan says to her and she gives him a brow raise. "What?"

"What is he doing?"

"He's coloring. And I thought I was the blind one."

"No no I mean.. those aren't murder plans. That's puppins."

"Yes? And?"

"And.. what did you do to him?"

"Treated him like a human being. Give it a try once inawhile." She says, and he comes back with more pictures, climbing in between them with no regard for space as he leans into her.

"Oh thank you. What is it?"

"It's you."

"Oh? How sweet. Do I look good?"

"Mhm!"

"Im glad. How about you show our friend here your amazing pictures. And he better be nice!"

So wade turns and now is leaning on logan as he points to a different picture. One of Logan with Puppins on a leash with a sun in the corner and crappy grass, a hearts all over the place.

At first he wants to tell him to get off of him, but seeing the pictures and how excited his eyes were to show him, it hits him and he understands.

".. uhm.. thank you?" But he puts it back in his hand. "Oh- you want me to keep it?"

Wade nods and starts cleaning up his crayons.

Logan turns to whisper to Al "How long does this go on?"

"About 2 hours or so."

"Why?"

"God only knows, but it helps with his nightmares."

"Colouring helps with his nightmares??"

"Its more then that. Hey sweetheart? Why don't you bring your ponys out."

"Theyre horses."

"Oh im sorry, my mistake. I think logan here wants to play horses."

Logan gives her a look like excuse me? When did I sign up for that? "No.. uhm.. I think im good."

Wade gets this look of sad innocence but goes to get them anyway, beginning to play by himself, brushing them and making them talk to each other quietly. As if he speaks any louder, he would get hit.

Logan groans and is like "Gimme a fucking horse.."

From then on, Logan is quick to understand what's happening and is much nicer to him, starts giving him snacks, buying him actual coloring books, and has pinned his drawings to the fridge each time he's gifted one. His horses name is Buttercup, by the way.

[darnell-la]

𝗦𝗛𝗘 𝗪𝗔𝗡𝗧𝗦 𝗔 𝗕𝗜𝗚 𝗗𝗢𝗚

pairing: the worst!logan howlett x younger generation!reader

warnings: Logan easing into the new world and generation, mention of Wade trying to get roommate!reader and Logan together, making a TikTok, sniffing, smut, etc.

note: “she don’t want no puppy! She wanna BIG dawg!”

———

Logan had thought living with Wade would be a bad idea. He belonged in his last universe with what he’s done. He brought himself down for years, mentally and physically, hoping the pain would stop. Thankfully, it finally had.

It’s been almost a year since Logan has lived with Wade and his younger roommate. The match seemed off when he first met her, but after the first hour, she knew why she and Wade were close friends.

The girl was in college, young, pretty, had a small job at the campus, and loved parties, and things that Wade did daily.

Logan had a small argument with y/n a couple of weeks ago after she gifted him an iPhone. She said he needed it to keep in touch with her and Wade. She also said he needed a bit of humor.

He had no idea what that meant until she made a TikTok for the man. The videos that came up on his page didn’t make sense to him, he he still laughed at them.

He had no idea what happened to himself, but sending memes to y/n every hour was a habit.

After sending y/n a TikTok video, he swiped and came across a sound that confused him.

The man in the video was lip-syncing a song as she showed his muscles. Logan gave a disgusting look at his phone, thinking the man looked ridiculous until he read the title.

“When she chose you because you’re height starts with a six and your weight starts with a two”

Logan sent the video to y/n, asking her what he meant by that. He didn’t know being a muscle-tall man was a trend.

“Logan, I’m in the room next to you, just come here!” Y/n shouted in her room, making him sigh loudly as he got off of the couch for the first time in what felt like days.

“I just wanted to know what he meant? Like is being big and tall a trend? Like, if that’s the case, then I’d be viral,” Logan used words that y/n and Wade ran him by.

“God, Logan — Do people your age question everything?” Y/n checked her phone and noticed what trend he sent her. She’s thought about this trend but with Logan in it. He fits it perfectly, but Wade would tease her if she’d ever brought it up.

“I’m just askin', Bub. Seemed stupid to me,” Logan shrugged his shoulders. “Because you haven’t tried it,” y/n defended her generation. “So, you’re into that stuff? God, y/n — Never knew you’d be one of those kids,”

“I do like it, and since you’re so boring, we’re gonna have you do it, so c’mere,” y/n stood up from her bed and placed her phone down on her desk after clicking the sound.

“Gotta take your shirt off for it,” y/n lied, but she knew he’d do it, even if he complained. “No fuckin’ way, bub,” Logan laughed as he turned around to go back to his sofa until she grabbed his arm softly.

“Please! You never do TikTok’s with me,” y/n fake cried, annoying him in an instant. “Ain’t takin’ my shirt off for no little girls online. I’d get, what’s it called? Canceled?” Logan said, making her laugh.

“Logan, you sound stupid as fuck. Take off the shirt — Unless you’re jealous they look better than you,” y/n shrugged her shoulders as she went back to her bed to sit down, acting like she didn’t care to get a reaction out of him.

“Bub, you know I look better than them, so stop the lyin,” Logan felt a bit upset at her words. Y/n ignored him for what felt like hours, so he sighed and gave up. “Swear to god, I’d Wade say some shit about this, I’ll kill him,”

Logan and y/n worked on the TikTok for an half hour, trying to get the right angle since he kept saying he didn’t look good enough.

Y/n never complained. Watching him walk through her door repeatedly, then editing the video in slow motion, made her stomach tingle.

At first, Logan felt uncomfortable. She could smell the young lady, but he didn’t want to say anything. He’d be a pervert if he did, so he kept quiet, thinking it would go away, but he knew her spot grew bigger.

“So, you think I’m a big dog?” Logan genuinely asked as y/n began to edit the TikTok video. “What makes you think that?” She asked; thinking she nailed her scared response, but Logan saw the quick stutter in her fingers as she typed on her phone.

“Just askin, bub,” Logan said before taking a small sniff. He was leaning on her doorway as she sat on her bed. He was so far., yet she smelt so close.

He cussed himself out in his head, upset that Wade had won this “you’ll like her eventually” argument. Logan swore she was too young, and even made her feel a bit bad.

He had thought y/n had moved on, maybe got over the thought of her having a chance with Wade’s new friend, but the smell she had, is making him go insane.

All she’s doing is making a TikTok. That’s it, but he can’t stop thinking about the spot she’s soaking in her panties. He felt nasty, but in a good way after a while. The lust was taking him over.

“You happy you’ve got your little video?” Logan asked as he kicked off of her dorm frame and walked towards her bed to sit next to her.

“Yes, finally,” she smiled at him before continuing her edit. Logan scanned the girl's body slowly, watching how spotty her breathing was, seeing goosebumps form on her arms, and watching her leg shake a bit.

“Is that so?” He asked as he placed his hand on her thigh. She’s always been a sweet bean to him, but he ignored it. He tried his best to prove Wade wrong, but she was hard to ignore, and Wade knew that. Wade knew y/n would bring something out in the grumpy old man.

“Mhm hm,” Y/n mumbled as she pushed the post on her phone. “Think it’ll get a lot of likes,” she looked to the side at Logan who was now closer than she thought.

“And why is that? I look good?” He asked her, eyes on her soft and pretty lips. “Uh, yeah — Think the viewers will like it,” she awkwardly smiled, feeling her heart raise.

“Think you liked it more than the viewers will,” Logan almost whispered. Y/n just noticed how his shirt was still off. Why was his shirt still off?

“Seen you repost that video, y/n. You’re not slick,” Logan spoke about the video he had sent her. “Think you were thinkin’ about me when you did it,” the man smirked.

“I- I was just reposting,” Y/n stuttered as his hand slowly cupped her chin. “Guess I’m not the big dog you’re lookin’ for them,” Logan faked sighing as he pulled his hand back.

Before he could turn around to get up, y/n grabbed his face and pulled him into a short but long kiss, hoping to get the best out of this one-time thing.

“Told you last you, you ain’t for me, baby,” Logan said, making y/n look down in embarrassment. “I know,” she said. “I lied — Was just goin’ through a little somethin,” Logan admitted before pulling her back into a kiss, this time rough.

Y/n gasped as he breathed into her mouth, sucking on her lips like he’d starved for days. “Lo,” y/n moaned low at the feeling of his pulling her into his rough kisses.

Logan decided to push Y/n down on her bed and lean over her, keeping their lips together. Y/n instantly wrapped her legs around the man, pulling him closer as he moved his hips, grinding on her to feel the pressure.

“Oh, fuck,” Logan groaned in between their kiss, feeling his cock leak already. “If I fuck you, Wade wins,” Logan pulled back from the girl, taking a look into her eyes. She thought the man would leave, get off of her and never speak to her again, until he assured her, he was staying.

“Fuck it — Can’t resist you anymore, baby,” Logan smashed his lips back onto the young lady's lips, kissing her roughly as he tugged on his jeans. All y/n had to do was pull up the gown she wore almost every day she was off of work when she was too lazy to dress up.

“Wait- We need a condom,” y/n leaned up, but Logan pushed her back down. “Oh, no we don’t. Your cunts leaking too much for me to not feel her,” Logan said. She was confused, not knowing how he knew she was wet until she thought to herself.

He’s a mutant. His only powers can’t be regeneration and speed.

“Fuck, I-“ y/n cut herself off, embarrassed at her pervy actions. He probably smells her all the time. “Caught red-handed,” Logan chuckled as he put his cock in hand.

“Always wet around the house. Teasin’ me and basically beggin’ for me every day. Wished I took you to my room when I first met you. Maybe by now, we’d have our little family,”

Logan pushed into the girl, giving her no time to think about what he had just said about a family.

She’s never thought of a family with Logan. It’s not he wasn’t father material, it’s the fact she’s only been thinking about him pleasing her, and pleasing her only.

“Fuck, that’s it,”

[obsessedwrhys]

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ Wolverine x Deadpool x F!Reader

ᯓ★ Being in a polyamory relationship with these two. (A dream inspired this AHAHHA–) fluff, lots of bickering between the two, funny/goofy shit, bit of jealousy/possessiveness, reader is fem!!

This whole relationship is a mess.

I'm talking never getting a moment of peace kind of mess.

For example this one time you drove the Honda Civic.

Nobody understood why you were the one behind the wheels 'cause now you're ramming into everything with Logan grabbing on the handle for dear life while Wade is having the time of his life at the back.

"Stop the damn car before we crash, bub! Yer gonna kill someone!" Logan shouted and at the same time Wade was screaming out the lyrics to "Highway to Hell" by AC/DC.

Did I mention how different these two are with you?

Wade loves it when you run to hug him, he would swing you around a couple of times with your legs wrapped around his waist.

As for Logan, he prefers something less than that. A simple hug is enough and you can't complain much about it because the way he completely engulfs you in his embrace always made your chest flutter.

It's no surprise that they are protective over you.

Like when you were captured by some troops in the void. The fire guy, Johnny Storm, couldn't help but try to flirt with you. He figured why not shoot his shot right?

"Hey..." He'd say, flashing you a cheesy smile.

And seeing his attempt to charm you, you couldn't help but find it amusing and chuckle.

Clearly the two didn't like it.

Which is why that may or may not be the reason why Wade decided to out the man and get him killed 🤷‍♀️ I guess we'll never know 🤔

You and Wade enjoy pulling pranks on Logan.

The sight of him being pissed off pleases you both.

There was this one time you guys swapped his whiskey to a non-alcoholic drink and you can imagine his frustration.

"WADE!!" But he can never get mad at you. He just can't.

Even Wade complains about this privilege of yours.

"Seriously Lo?! You're gonna get mad at me and not our lovely prank partner here? Come on man, we're both guilty parties in this crime scene. If you wanna get angry, at least share the spotlight :("

Cue you sticking your tongue out at Wade as he pouts with puppy dog eyes.

All jokes aside, the two love and support you dearly.

I like to think Logan is more of an old romantic and Wade is the adventurous type.

That's why it can sometimes take a while for them to decide what to get as a present for you.

"Why the fuck would she want a pillowcase with our faces on it?" Logan asked with genuine disgust in his eyes.

"Why wouldn't she?! It's cute as fuck, and you can never have too many pictures of us together. Besides, it's a lot cheaper than buying a life-sized statue of me for her bedroom, although that's an option too, I hear Wolverine-shaped body pillows are all the rage these days" Without realising, he continued on muttering nonsense to himself which had Logan roll his eyes.

"I'm buying her the leather jacket and it's final" Not letting Wade say anything, he'd walk off to the cashier with him left behind. His action causing him to get irritated.

"What about the budget?!?!" He'd raise his voice but Logan simply ignored him. Fed up, he stomps on his feet as he points at his back.

"Fine, you big lug!! I'll let you have your way this time. But don't come crying to me when she dumps us for a pair of more decisive superheroes!!" He'd shout.

In the end you appreciated the gifts you got for your birthday. Each gift speaks for their character.

You guys definitely have lazy days.

Days where you'll lounge around in pajamas and watch cheesy romantic comedies together, complete with a pile of blankets and snacks.

Expect there to be lots of laughter, cringing, and the occasional eye rolling. Not to forget how you three would start making fun of the characters and the cliche plotlines.

Logan clearly struggles to sit through the entire movie marathon and you always have the to be the one to pull his arm to prevent him from leaving.

"Gimme a break, bub. It’s the same damn thing every time— the good guy wins, the bad guy loses. It’s like they think we got the emotional range of a rock"

"Gee, what a buzz kill. But are they wrong though? You practically live like a rock!!" Wade laughed with Logan letting out a scowl.

Thank goodness you're dating them or else they'd be fighting almost all the time.

In the relationship you're the peacemaker

No but seriously Wade calls you that and the nickname has stuck to you.

You enjoy sleeping in the middle with the two on either sides. Half of the time you always wake up with the two fighting over you.

Just imagine Logan pulling you closer to him but before he could even do that, Wade would be quick to pull you back to his embrace despite them both being asleep.

You like to think it's their reflexes. That even when sleeping they're still fighting with each other 😭

However you absolutely adore the two.

Logan will MELT when you kiss his knuckles. Especially when you do it with your eyes locked to his. He will literally go feral for you.

And Wade? He absolutely loveloveloves it when you baby him. It's his guilty pleasure. Hold him close with his face placed against your chest and he swears the voices in his head finally quiets down. That's why you're his angel.

Also, the two really enjoy showering you with kisses. You can barely ever hold back a smile with the two smooching every surface of your face.

Will do anything to get your praise.

The competitiveness is too much.

Oh Logan got you a bouquet? Well Wade got you a bouquet made of tacos. Who's the better one now huh? 😋

To be fair Wade is Wade. There's nothing you can do about it... but that doesn't mean Logan is ever gonna let him get his way.

"Where's Wade?" You'd ask, watching Logan sink on the sofa beside you.

"Don't know... could care less..." He'd say, wrapping an arm around you to snuggle with you. In the other room Wade has been stuffed inside the closet. Completely restrained and duck taped.

All I can say is that dating them is all fun and love. Literal baby girls.

[ovaryacted]

─ Variant! Logan Howlett x fem! reader || WC: 1.4k

CW: None. Sort-of fluffy content/slice of life. Alcohol consumption. Kissing at the end. Just relationship dynamics and a growing yearning from grumpy Logan.

You knew I wasn't done talking about Logan right? Well, in this case, we are talking about Variant! Logan aka the Worst Logan from the Deadpool & Wolverine movie. I just got on the doc and thought about him, and this could've been a fic but this is what I came up with. This is also the first time I've written in this kind of format like "headcanons" but as you continue its basically a fic lol. Had to talk about this version of him because I am very fond of it and I loved him, truly. Anyway, hope y'all like it. <3

Variant! Logan who gets introduced to you on Wade’s account and it’s a complete accident. You stumbled into the apartment asking for the bottle of wine he had yanked from you earlier in the week.

Variant! Logan who observes you from afar as you walk into the kitchen, reaching toward one of the higher cabinets to grab the bottle of prosecco you desperately wanted. The moment you turn around to spot a whole new stranger in the room, you pivot to Wade and ask “Who’s the big guy?”

Variant! Logan who gets pressured by Wade to formally introduce himself and shake your hand, fingers mindfully wrapping around yours as he catches your name after saying his. He notices the way you smiled up at him, bright and charming, before turning to give Wade a friendly kiss on the cheek and waltzing back out.

Variant! Logan who quickly begins to get used to your presence, frequently stopping by Wade’s place to drop off dinner, cooked pastries, and alcohol. Your cooking definitely beat the emergency pizza and sandwiches Wade constantly got for him. Not to mention you made a mean tiramisu he grows addicted to craving.

Variant! Logan who often spots you chatting with Wade over anything and everything under the sun. He can’t recall the multiple pop culture references you both shared, or how you managed to make him laugh with your corny jokes, but he’s not complaining.

Variant! Logan who sits on the left side of you when you come by for movie nights or to binge-watch reality TV shows with Wade. You’d be munching away at some popcorn, wearing matching PJs with him while Logan leans into his side of the couch nursing a beer.

Variant! Logan who catches your glances as you hand him the popcorn bowl to grab a handful. He reaches for it, large palm grasping several kernels and munching on them one by one. Your eyes met his for a brief second before returning to the screen, and Logan swears you were grinning.

Variant! Logan who is uneasy speaking to you when Wade isn’t around, not wishing to make you uncomfortable with his grumpy attitude. You don’t mind either way, walking into the apartment to drop off some food and a fresh bottle of Jack Daniels for Logan as a proper welcome present. He didn’t expect a gift, or for you to even be thinking about him at all, but he’s glad you’ve allowed him space in your mind.

Variant! Logan who is more comfortable talking to you in person outside of grunts and nods. Despite babbling like Wade and having an equally foul mouth, you could hold an actual conversation in comparison to the other. Hearing your voice was also a plus.

Variant! Logan who is surprised when you bring him a book you think he might like, something about contemporary American history that felt like something up his alley. It was the first book that got him back into reading, and slowly but surely, he finds himself reading a little every night when Wade isn’t snoring his ears off.

Variant! Logan who gets invited to dinner at your place with Wade tagging along, something to celebrate your job promotion. Wade is really only there for the food and the lemon pound cakes you saved, munching away and telling you about the dickhead he just stabbed not too long ago. And though Logan wants to pretend he’s there for the hard liquor you only reserve for him, deep down he knows he came for you too.

Variant! Logan who enjoys the quiet moments with you, sneaking away to your apartment when you offer and lounging on the couch with another book in his hand. You sit across from him on the armchair, quietly reading on your end. He doesn’t realize he’s staring until you look at him from the corner of your eye, forcing him to flip to the next page.

Variant! Logan who isn’t paying attention to the current film playing on the TV, another late movie night with The Godfather on the screen. Wade had already fallen asleep halfway through the movie, and you dozed off at the 2 hr mark. Your body had ended up leaning against Logan’s, naturally gravitating to his warmth and stability. He could have moved you to let you sit up straight, but instead he moves his arm from resting on the back of the couch to wrap around your shoulder. His breath hitches when you move in closer to him, and he thinks you can hear his heart pounding in his ribs.

Variant! Logan who catches himself peeking at you for longer periods of time. It didn’t matter if your back was facing him, or if you were too busy showing Wade the latest TikTok trend. His eyes always seemed to drift to you, and it would be worse when you caught him looking. He’ll blow it off and huff as if he were irritated, missing how you smiled to yourself from the interaction.

Variant! Logan who has to take shit from Wade teasing him over his obvious not so obvious crush. “C’mon man, just tell her. If you don’t, I will!” That conversation ended with the schling of Logan’s claws piercing into Wade’s leg. He’s pissed off, but Logan knows he’s right.

Variant! Logan who sits with you on the couch during one of Wade’s house parties, nursing a cup of whiskey as you enjoy your homemade cosmo. The two of you have already mingled with the rest of the party-goers, your social battery running dry. So you both decide to be in your own bubble, communicating amongst yourselves and making fun of Wade’s lame party hat.

Variant! Logan who nervously swallows when you laugh at his joke, playfully slapping him on the sternum, shaking your head and nearly dropping your red solo cup. He takes in your expression, commemorating it to his memory as your smile widens and you shift to look at him. Your hand didn’t move from its place on his chest, and he didn’t have any intention of telling you to remove it. So you leave it there for a while longer before drawing away from him. 

Variant! Logan who walks you back home after the party, using it as an excuse to “sober up” and make sure you were alright to ease his own anxieties. You talk along the way, and he ignores the flutters in his stomach from the close proximity. 

Variant! Logan who stands by your front door as you unlock it, asks again if you were going to be alright on your own to which you nod. You thank him, his heart beating at the way you looked at him, like you cared about him, like he mattered. He brushes it off with a shrug and digs his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

Variant! Logan who doesn’t stop you when you step closer to him to place a gentle and affectionate kiss on his cheek, the touch making a shiver roll down his spine. You were right there, temptation dangling in front of his face. His eyes ask you a silent question, letting you call the shots when you plant your lips over his, soft and mellow.

Variant! Logan who suppresses the moan that threatens to slip out, feeling the tip of your tongue graze his bottom lip and silently ask for entrance. He shouldn’t, not when the alcohol was still running it’s course. Hesitantly, he pulled away from you, holding your waist with one hand and the other caressing your forearm.

Variant! Logan who is quick to reassure you after your sudden look of disappointment. “Not like this. Maybe, when you don’t taste like vodka and cranberries?” You laugh at that, nodding and rubbing the tip of your nose against his. “Only if you make it up to me with dinner.” He lets you go after that with one last kiss, standing in front of your apartment door for a minute more to catch his breath before heading back outside.

Variant! Logan who walks back to the apartment with a stupid smile on his face, one that he doesn’t register he’s sporting until he stepped through the door to spot Wade cleaning up the mess left behind on the kitchen table. He mentioned something about lipgloss over his lips and the side of his cheek, only getting a grumble and a few curse words in return. Logan ignores him and goes to the bathroom “to take a piss”, spotting the remnants of your lipgloss over his aged features. He grins, making a mental note to look for places to take you out for dinner in the morning.

©️ ovaryacted 2024. Please don’t repost, copy, translate, or feed into any AI. Support your fellow creators by reblogging, commenting, and liking!

[melancholymetropolis]

“Lord have mercy,” the plump woman clenched the couch cushion tighter. “Logan. . . Please. . .”

Seated on the floor between her separated thighs and bunched up sundress was a man pulling her panties to the side. The wolverine’s hot mouth fanned the moist folds of her glistening cunt causing the woman to shiver. His deep brown eyes flickered up to hers, a question in his gaze. The woman took her bottom lip between her teeth and gave the older gentleman a slow nod. Every rational thought had drifted away the moment Logan captured her lips in a heated kiss.

To think it all started with a pyrex dish filled with homemade lasagna.

As a woman born and raised in North Carolina, Y/N L/N knew a thing or two about Southern Hospitality. She has distinct memories of her mom baking muffins for the new families in the neighborhood and offering juice boxes to any child playing in the sweltering heat. She was early for every council meeting, funeral and church picnic there was. 

Y/N's mama was the kind to spread love everywhere she went and managed to wear down even the grumpiest assholes there ever were.

Sadly, Y/N didn't have that gift.

At least she thought she didn't.

Logan Howlet was the grumpiest man she'd ever met. He didn't speak to anyone, always kept his head down and pretended not to hear the crappy things people said about him. He frequented the liquor stor as if it were a second job, but never smelled like liquor somehow. 

He had all but slammed the door in Y/N’s face when she offered him the glass dish. The younger woman thanked the heavens his roommate, Wade, swooped in to rescue the tilting dish from crashing on the patio floor.

The man's dripping tongue slid from her oozing center to her aching bud. The plump woman groaned loudly from the action and leaned further onto the arm of the couch. With one leg thrown over his shoulder and the other attempting to keep her balance, Y/N realized how obscure the position— fuck it through whole situation was.

One minute she was at the door, dropping off Wade's monthly pan of lasagna and the next Logan was pushing her against the kitchen counters, kissing her silly. He didn't bother ripping her dress off completely. Just broke a few buttons to gain access to her heavy breasts. One of his hands was gently squeezing the mound as his tongue tapped at her bud. 

The soft muscle swirled around her clit before the lips latched onto it. The older man sucked on the bud tenderly, whilst gripping her thigh so tightly she was sure it would leave bruises the next day. The sounds coming from her lips didn't feel light her own as the ripples of pleasure moved along her nerves like dancers. The plump woman took her bottom lip between her teeth as she watched his move against her womanhood. The salt and pepper hair atop his head nestled between her brown skin was something out of a dream. The sounds of his throaty groans as his sucked her cunt had turned her brain to goo and somehow made her even wetter.

"Take them off," Y/N said, suddenly. "My panties. They're getting in the way."

"Yes, Ma'am! Although, that will be a little hard to do considering Wolfy's posi--- oh shit! You absolutely weren't talking to me like at all," an annoying familiar voice sounds causing us to freeze in place. "But, I wish you would start to because I am about to bust just----"

"Either get the fuck out or come over here and put that mouth to use," Logan snapped, rising to his feet and staring pointedly at Wade. "Because I do not have the time for your bullshit today."

"I'll take option numero dos, Alex," the taller gentleman practically skipped to the couch. "If it is okay with the lady?"

"I'm. . . uh. . . I'm fine with it?"

-------------------------

this scene has been stuck in my head since I seen the film last weekend.

fun fact: I used to be a MASSIVE Marvel fan before the pandemic and secretly wrote Steve Rogers fics.

if you want a full piece, comment or send an ask.

Been thinking of writing some throuple stories. Thoughts?

[tremendouscreationperson]

Logan x Reader pt.2

So I truly didn't think that many people would like this but thank y'all so much, genuinely

The reader is unfortunately no longer GN, they are referred to as 'mom' but otherwise fairly neutral

There is blood/sort of self harm imagery in this one but it ISNT SELF HARM I promise! Make sure you only read if you're comfortable though!!!

<< Part 1 Part 3 >> Masterlist

Waking up next to him was pretty surreal. Mostly because of how relaxing it actually was. His chest pillowed your head and one of his arms was around your back, playing with your hair. He smelt fucking amazing.

You lifted your head and looked down at him, images of last night flashing behind your eyes. It had actually been pretty funny to begin with, neither of you could work out how to get the other out of their suits, ending in you both giggling and undressing yourselves. He was out of his suit lightning quick - you're surprised it is still intact - and immediately found his way back to you. Kissing your neck and you struggled to remove your shoes.

“I promise this isn't some elaborate plot to turn you off.” You laughed as your foot was finally free of the blasted shoe.

He merely hummed, breath fanning your neck as he slowly bit down. Your brain short-circuited and it took a full shaky breath for you to be back in the room and removing the spandex.

His face was calm, relaxed, and he gifted you a small smile.

“Hey.”

You grinned back. “Hi.”

“It's still pretty early.” He wiggled his brows.

Your cheeks warmed and, in a move that probably wasn't wise, you hid your face in his chest. “No. We have to get ready.”

His chest rumbled with his chuckle and you groaned, placing playful kisses on his pecs.

“C’mon, baby.” He pulled you up to his lips and kissed you slow. Taking his time with a leisurely pace.

You kissed him back before nipping his bottom lip, knowing it would drive him crazy, and pulling back. “Stop." Kiss. "It's a big day." Kiss. "I gotta make sure Laura eats.”

Confusion splattered across his features but he slowly released you. A fact that you were grateful for because you don't think you could've rebuked him another time.

You eased yourself up, still a little sleepy and a little sore before stretching fully. His eyes watched your naked body shamelessly and you turned to locate your suit.

“What is that?” His expression was stony.

You turned around to catch what he had seen and couldn't find anything. “Was it a spider or something?”

“No, what is that?” He pointed at you.

There better not be a fucking spider on me. You looked down, scared, to see nothing. Just yourself, naked as the day you were born. “I'm still confused.”

“That fucking scar on your back."

Ah.

Shit.

He hadn't seen it last night because he had you laid on your back for the majority of it.

“Oh. That scar.” You played it off. “It's nothing real-”

“Did I do that?”

“No. It wasn't you.” You bit your cheek. “It was a version of you.”

“Wh-”

“Lo.” You stopped him before he could spiral, placing a hand on his cheek. “Nothing happened that I couldn't handle. He just got lucky and unlike you I can't heal everything so unfortunately I have claw marks. But I am alive and safe and you are not to blame.”

He looked like he was about to argue but a knock at the door stopped that.

“Guys, are ya decent?” Wade asked in a sing-song voice.

Not really. “You okay?” You called back.

“Yeah, I'm here to tell you to hurry up because Maya doesn't know how to end this part.”

Who the fuck was Maya? “O-okay?”

“See ya soon!”

Logan didn't look like he wanted to move. He was content with staying here and blaming himself for something that he didn't do.

“Look, Logan, if he is awake they all are. It's time to go.”

He had to agree with you there.

~~

Logan entered the main living space and was unsurprised to see everyone else there. Gambit was sitting with Elektra talking strategy, Blade was kneeling spinning his weapon and psyching himself up, Deadpool copying every move he made and you were braiding Laura's hair.

“At least they won't be able to grab your hair, lovely.” You kissed her crown as you finished, tying it off with a small piece of fabric. She smiled and scooped a handful of dry cereal into her mouth. “Make sure you have some fruit, please.” The girl rolled her eyes but did take a piece of fruit from the can by your feet. “Good girl.”

Laura would never tell anyone but she loved praise from you. You were her favourite person and for you to tell her she was doing good meant the world. She liked to be strong and fierce but secretly she loved when you babied her.

“You her mom or something?” Logan asked. He didn't mean for it to sound so insulting. Every set of eyes turned to him, their judgement sitting heavily on his shoulders.

Wade even piped up, “What in the ever loving fuck?”

You looked up shocked and a little embarrassed. “No, of course not. But it's good to keep her safe and s-she needs a balanced diet, so I try to... provide one.” Oh, god. You sounded crazy. Your gaze fell to Laura who was staring right back at you. “Sorry. I guess I have been acting like your.. I know you have parents and I know I'm not- I’m sorry.”

“I don't have any parents.” She clarified.

That didn't hurt, per se, but it didn't feel good.

“‘course you do.” El called over. “She just braided your hair.”

Laura smiled and leant further into you, you hugged her back and handed the can of fruit to her. “Have you packed your things?”

“Yeah.” She nodded. Her ‘things’ were her comics and a pair of sunglasses. The light was far too bright for her eyes and they were a blessing in this wasteland.

“That's good.” You smiled as she stood up and walked through Wolverine, clipping his shoulder with her own.

Gambit asked Laura to help him in the other room. Everyone in your party knew it was a distraction so that Blade could feed. It was your turn and you knew it would go over swimmingly with the man that just insulted you.

“I didn't mean-”

“It's fine.” You stood and made your way over to the Daywalker. “You ready?”

“I hate this.” He clasped your arm and you helped him to his feet.

Wade reached his arm out and you obliged, pulling him up too. He bounced happily on his toes and hugged you. “You can be my mom any time.”

“Sure thing.” You chuckled.

“Where are you going?” Logan asked. He was just stood awkwardly where he had stopped in front of you and Laura.

“To feed Blade.”

“Feed him?”

Blade sneered, revealing his fangs. “I used to have a friend that helped my hunger. Now I'm here.”

“We all pitch in.” Elektra continued. “Take turns.”

Wade fanned himself, “he bites you? Kinky bitch.”

“No,” You shook your head. “I cut myself and pour an amount into a glass, we have a measuring line. It's a very well thought out system.”

“Cut yourself.” Logan's stony expression hadn't quite left from earlier but was back in full force now.

“It might sound strange to you but it's a good system.” You defended it. “We try to shield little Laura, we all take turns, it's fair. The only victim is Blade! He hates it!”

Blade, who had stayed quiet, nodded. He was embarrassed to ask anything like this, he hated that he was a Dhampir. His mother had died because of a selfish Vampire and said being cursed him, he swore to rid the world of them and here he was. No better than those he hunted.

“I'll do it.” Logan volunteered. “I heal so I'll do it.”

“You don't have t-”

“I'll do it.” He was firm but then spoke lowly. “I don't want any more scars on you.”

You sighed but agreed, half hating and half loving him.

“Come on then.” You ushered them both into the makeshift kitchen.

Deadpool followed watching with wide eyes.

Blade hung back as you got the glass, it had been scratched halfway to indicate the measurement.

“That's a lot of blood.” Logan's tone was accusatory.

“Every other day.” Blade informed, emotionless.

Logan was quick to yank off a glove and cut a quick slice on his hand. The hand had so many veins that he was sure it would take seconds to fill the cup. Except, he healed before he could fill it a quarter of the way.

He repeated his actions and the cut seemed to heal faster.

“This is embarrassing.” Wade ‘whispered’.

“Shut up.” Logan growled as he did it again and finally got just under the mark. “Is that enough?”

“Not quite-”

Blade agreed to stop this painful display. “It'll do.”

“Blade, we have a big fight coming up, you'll need all your strength.”

“It's okay, I'll be good.” He picked the glass up and took long thick swallows, hating that the taste was good. That it itched the scratch in the back of his head.

“So if he's a Vampire why can he go out in sunlight?” Deadpool asked whilst Blade licked his lips.

“Daywalker.. he can handle light.” You recalled something, “actually did you know that Dracula could as well? Sunlight didn't kill him, it just weakened him.”

Blade set the glass down, “I killed that mother fucker.”

“Dracula?”

“Yeah.”

“He's real?”

“Real as the stake I shoved into his heart.”

You were in complete shock. “Are you being serious? For real life? This… this is mind-blowing.”

Wade shrugged. “I dunno, I'm pretty sure in that comic he comes back to life.”

“Comic?” Blade raised a brow.

“Yeah keep up, sweety, this is a bunch of nerd comics thrust together with you included.” Deadpool pointed at you.

~~

You'd never seen a fully grown man scream ‘shotgun’ and sprint to the side of a car. Yet, here he was, shoving Gambit to the side and opening the door of a Honda.

Wade rolled down the window and explained, “I'm not driving but I am a passenger princess.”

“I guess, I'll drive.” Elektra shrugged and there were no objections. She was probably the most logical of all of you, she could handle his outbursts and tune him out. She had done that to Daredevil for years apparently.

Laura, Gambit and Blade were next in the car, the latter sandwiched in between the others. You smiled at Laura leaning against him.

“Y/N.” Logan gestured to the open boot. Oh, right. Yeah. You'd have to get in the boot. With Logan. The man that had been cold towards you today. Great.

You shuffled into the car and settled your backpack next to you, he got in behind you and you were both just sitting facing each other. Knees meeting.

You busied yourself with your backpack, handing Laura her sunglasses. She had them on her head and placed them down for a second, forgetting them. Luckily you picked them up for her.

“There you go, hun.”

She blushed and took them happily. “Thank you.”

“You're welcome.”

After that there was nothing else to do. You had no distractions.

Wade had put the radio on as El had pulled away from your home. This might be the last time you ever saw it. It was actually a little bit sad. You all might never be back here. Or all but one could be, you hated that thought. It was bad enough Johnny being dead - and he was fairly annoying - you couldn't handle anyone else. Were you going to cry? No. You weren't. You were fine. Everyone would be fine.

You sniffed just as Britney Spears started singing and Gambit and Wade put on a terrific performance.

"I think I did it again."

“You look tired.” Logan whispered, the others wouldn't hear him over the duet.

“Do I?” You frowned. What had you done to him this morning? “Way to make a girl feel special.”

“No I mean.” He sighed. “Have a nap. It's a long journey.”

“There's not an abundance of space.” You gestured to each other.

Logan manoeuvred and motioned for you to move with him, you were wary but did as he asked and ended up in a very comfortable position. It mirrored how you had awoken this morning, resting on his chest, except you were both closer. If that was possible.

To be comfortable he pulled your leg over his, leaving the other straight, and wrapped both arms around your sides.

“I'm sorry I've been a dick.” He whispered against your hair. “I- The scar set me off this morning and everything I've done since I can't explain. I don't know why I've been an asshole. I jus-I haven't meant to be it's just come out like that.”

“It's alright.” You raised one shoulder in a half shrug. Your Logan had explained once that sometimes he says something and between his brain and his mouth it was as though it went through an 'asshole filter'. He truly didn't mean to be a dickhead but he couldn't help it. He usually felt horrible when it happened.

“No it isn't-”

You placed your hand on his lips, “yes it is. Now shush let me sleep. I was up practically all night.”

At least that got you an amused huff.

Part 3

[avocado-writing]

i'm not a very big chain person, but in my head i can picture so perfectly Logan getting him and his s/o a matching pair of chain necklaces or bracelets to quietly express his love and commitment. because, in comparison to other forms of jewelry, chains are durable- it's hard for a quality chain to break. to him, they signify how the bond you've fostered together is unbreakable too.

if he manages to get them in adamantium, there's the added layer of gifting you something made of the same material as his skeleton. his way of gifting you a part of him, of always being with you... ;-;

He used to wake up to a pounding skull and a truly bitter hatred of the world. A constant stream of alcohol had managed to silence the first issue - or, at least, make it tomorrow Logan’s problem - but had just made the second one far worse. 

He knew he was a mean drunk. Wade never shied away from letting him know what a cunt he was when he was ten drinks deep, but it was easier to face life when he stopped trying to be gracious to it.

The world had never cared about him, so why should he care about it right back?

That was… before, though. Before you. Not exactly some sort of holy light but you’d been damn well close. Someone he’d wanted to get his act together for, try to break free from the cocoon of rot and misery he’d made for himself. 

So, nowadays, he wakes up to soft singing and the smell of frying eggs. 

You’re an earlier riser than he is, slipping out of his grasp somehow - he always tries to grab you and keep you in bed with him, despite your dramatic but insincere protests - and getting a start on your day to make the most of it. You’re so much more of a functional person than he is that it’s laughable (Wade has pointed this out a couple of times, while laughing, and you’d talked him down from giving the merc a claw through the eye). 

He drags himself to his feet and heads into the kitchen. 

The radio is on quietly and you’re half-humming along with it, trying not to be too loud so as not to wake him. You can’t help but sing and secretly it’s one of those little things he fucking loves about you. It’s how he can tell you’re happy, so he never wants you to stop. 

You hear him appear and turn with a smile so bright it outdoes the morning sun. Ahh fuck, and you look amazing. Those short pyjamas that highlight the curve of your ass, those stupid fuzzy slippers you constantly leave around the apartment for him to trip over…

… and there, around your neck and resting on your clavicle, the chain. 

He’d never been good at gifts, but he knew he wanted a way to match you. Something to look at in his own reflection to remember you’re waiting for him at home; a part of him to carry with you so you know he’ll always keep you safe. Your eyes had lit up when you’d opened the jewellery case he’d handed over, neatly wrapped by the store, and then welled with tears when he’d shown you his own one. With blunt, uncareful fingers he’d fastened the clasp at the back of your neck, breathing in the comforting smell of you when you’d wrapped your arms around him. 

“I’m so lucky to have you, Logan.”

He’s more lucky to have you. You shine in the sun and so does every adamantium link. A fucking beacon in this world for him. A lighthouse. Bringing him home. 

“Hey, baby. Sorry, did I wake you up?” you ask, turning the music off now he has your full attention. He considers this and smirks. 

“Mmm, if I say yeah, do you have to find a way to apologise?”

You grin at the huskiness of his early morning voice and the promise of what’s next, turning off the heat on the pan before inevitably forgetting and burning the eggs. As you step into his arms he knows what the rest of the morning will entail: he’ll take you back to bed and show you how much you mean to him, three or four times if he can coax it out of you, then you’ll head to the diner across the street to eat because you’ll be too boneless to do much of anything else. 

Sounds pretty fucking perfect to him. His mind flashes to the ring he has in its little box, the one he bought at the same time as the chains and keeps stuffed in one of his jacket pockets, and is sure one day soon he’ll have the courage to give that to you too. 

Taglist: @mildly-salted @belilwen @malfoys-demigod @falsewordz @tvwebs @getmeoutofhell @rush-the-stars @s1eep-o @yrthr @just-a-beatlemaniac69 @childeslegstrap

[boltwrites]

Reader/Logan where reader is trying so hard to seduce Logan but mans a brick wall and when Reader just about gives up Logan confront them and reciprocates their feelings (smut?[optional])

A/N: no smut here, just because i'm working on a lot more smut for other fics. this is just kind of cute and definitely more than a little silly. Also, just general headcanons, and very gender neutral.

You've never tried so hard to seduce a man in your whole life, honestly. As soon as you met that man and Wade said he was going to be sticking around, you started thinking up a game plan.

Step one was obvious: dressing up for him. You started out casual enough - if you ever had to go see Wade about something, you made sure you looked nice. Hair styled, with clothes that made you feel confident and attractive. Maybe makeup, if that's your thing.

It didn't seem to illicit much reaction from Logan, though. He was usually involved in something else - didn't really pay you any mind. Hardly spoke to you, in fact, even when you batted your lashes at him and told you that you brought him some liquor as a "welcome to the apartment" gift. He'd just nodded at you, took it, and told you a very generic "hey - thanks." Like - he could have said that to his worst fucking enemy. Or some random fuck on the street. It gave you nothing.

So, obviously, you had to up the ante. Now you weren't just dressing nice, you were dressing slutty. Maybe for you, that was wearing a button-up shirt with the sleeves rolled up over your forearms and some tight ass pants, or one too many buttons undone on that dress shirt. Maybe it was crop tops and booty shorts. Hell - maybe it was push-up bras and thigh highs. Whatever it was, you made sure to wear it the next time you sauntered on over to Wade's place.

And motherfucking Wade noticed. Made some asinine comment that you were trying to steal him away from Vanessa. You slapped him in the face as you played it off as whatever excuse you had this week, waltzing your way into the apartment so you could talk to Wade and see if Logan would look your way. Because that would be the key - if you could get him to look at you, you were sure you would know. There was always a sort of vibe in the air when two people who wanted to fuck looked at each other. You'd be able to tell.

Except - god fucking dammit - he was like a brick wall. You'd greeted Logan, waited for his eyes to dance over your outfit - and you got nothing. Maybe - maybe - his jaw clenched? but you couldn't tell. Fuck.

OK. Phase two: you'd have to get a little more assertive. You started inviting Wade and Logan out. You really didn't want to have to move on to phase two, because it meant you had to deal with Wade outside of his own apartment, which also meant you ran the risk of getting banned from fine, upstanding establishments. But fuck it, you'd risk it for Logan.

You took them out to a bar, along with Vanessa and Peter. You'd made sure to take the stool next to Logan. You did the usual - laughed at his jokes, asked him a couple questions when the conversation lulled. You leaned in when he spoke, and at one point you even worked up the courage to touch his arm.

And things had been going... well, alright, until you decided to do that. You'd been enjoying yourself - you'd even been kind of enamored with Logan for some of his answers. He'd replied to you like he would anyone else - except maybe Wade, since he wasn't rude and he didn't stab you - but there wasn't any animosity there. But when you touched him - he noticed. His eyes shot straight to your hand on his arm and his fingers had balled into a fist. You'd had to retract your arm and make a hasty apology and an even hastier excuse before he could chide you about it. You'd been so fucking embarrassed.

Whatever, OK. Setback. Not the end of the world. You take them to the club. Negasonic and Yukio even come. You're pretty sure Logan will be posted up at the bar all night, but that's fine! You still get to wear an extra hot outfit and, if plied with alcohol or other substances of your choice, you could certainly work up the courage to ask him to dance. It was a foolproof plan, nothing could possible go wrong -

Logan got himself kicked out before you could even begin to put it into motion. You had literally been sipping one of your first drinks of the night (either alcoholic or not, you needed to stay hydrated on the dance floor) and Logan had decided that, at no later that 11 at night, he needed to start a bar fight. It was hot, you weren't going to lie - he picked the dude up by the scruff of the neck and slammed him into the bar like he weighed nothing, fucking growled about it. God, you wanted to fuck him. But it still cut all your plans short.

You tried so much shit after that. Staging a movie night so you could sneak in a cuddle? Wade insisted on sitting between the two of you. Tried to ask Logan if he wanted food or to go out for a drink alone? Wade cut in and insisted on joining. Trying a thinly veiled sex joke or innuendo was out of the fucking question - Wade could smell those for miles away and would call you out on your old man crush immediately. It had to be godly intervention that he hadn't said anything so far.

Eventually? You were exhausted. You'd tried everything - and while Wade had thwarted some of your plans, most of them had just fallen flat. Logan just didn't respond to them. He didn't seem interested in seeing you in sexy clothes, didn't really seek you out in conversation. He hadn't insisted Wade stay home when you specifically asked Logan out and Wade interjected. And - it all came down to how he looked at you when you touched his arm. Maybe - maybe he didn't like you. Maybe you were too young for him. Maybe he didn't like anybody.

So, you stopped trying. It had taken a lot of energy to put in that effort, and you weren't interested in keeping that up for a man who didn't reciprocate. You'd still hang out with Wade and Logan, of course - but you weren't going to be arranging things specifically to try and seduce Logan, now.

That was, until two weeks after your decision to no longer pursue him, there was a knock on your door. And when you opened it - it was Logan. With - was that like, three garbage bags?

"Told Wade I was taking the trash out." Logan explained, nodding towards them. "Didn't want him following." Because Wade did kind of follow Logan around like a forlorn puppy - except when chores and/or manual labor were involved. But - ok, yeah, the trash bags were weird, but why had Logan specifically sidestepped Wade to come see you?

"Do you need something?" you asked. Maybe Logan was upset that you hadn't brought any booze over for a while. Maybe he needed cash. Your heart dropped thinking about it. But his eyebrow quirked up just a bit.

"You," he replied, plain as day. "You haven't been around lately." You blinked at him? Did he- "did you miss me?"

"I-" he caught himself, closed his eyes and bit his lip as he quelled something? "Yeah. Yeah, I did."

You were shocked, honestly. You were sure your mouth was hanging open. "But - you-"

"If Wade saw, you know that little shit would never let us hear the end of it," Logan posited, and your eyes widened. "So- so that was why you were acting like you didn't give a shit about me?"

He nodded, offering up a wry smile. "Mhm." Oh, for fuck's sake. "So - you do want to fuck me?" "Oh yes." His smile widened, with a low chuckle added to his reply. Oh, fuck.

You reached over the threshold of your door, grabbed the collar of his shirt, and fucking yanked.

"Then get the fuck in here, you - fucking - you tease!"

Later, with Logan curled up in your bed and nothing on except your underwear, someone pounded on your door, harsh and startling. It was accompanied by the pissed off voice of none other than Blind Al: "I almost tripped over your goddamn garbage and broke a fucking hip, 203! You owe me for that!"

[awkward-walking-potato]

Can I request headcanons for Remy, Wade, and Logan would think about his gender neutral s/o always made sure to tell him that they love him when possible please?

Here's how Remy, Wade, and Logan might react and feel about a gender-neutral S/O who always makes sure to tell them "I love you" whenever possible:

Remy LeBeau (Gambit):

Remy is a charmer by nature, and he's used to giving out sweet words, but hearing "I love you" from you is something that never fails to touch his heart. Every time you say it, he feels a warmth spread through him, like he's just been wrapped in a blanket of affection. Remy knows he has a checkered past, and sometimes, he wonders if he deserves the kind of love you give him so freely. But you always manage to reassure him with those three little words.

He might play it cool on the outside, flashing you that roguish smile of his, but inside, it means the world to him. He’ll always reply with a playful, “Je t'aime aussi, ma chère,” making sure to add a flirtatious wink. But later, when you're both alone, Remy will pull you close, resting his forehead against yours, and tell you in a softer, more serious tone just how much your love means to him. He’s not one to take such things lightly, and he’ll always make sure you know how much he treasures every “I love you” you offer.

Wade Wilson (Deadpool):

Wade is a chaotic whirlwind of emotions, and your constant declarations of love are like a lifeline for him. Underneath his endless jokes and fourth-wall-breaking antics, Wade has a lot of insecurities and trauma. Hearing you say "I love you" so often helps to quiet some of the darker thoughts that occasionally plague him.

Every time you tell Wade you love him, his heart skips a beat. He'll respond in a million different ways, from exaggeratedly swooning, pretending to faint, or suddenly bursting into song about how amazing you are. But sometimes, when he's feeling particularly vulnerable, Wade will drop the act for a moment, his voice dropping to a soft, almost disbelieving tone as he says, "You really mean that, huh?"

He might joke around a lot, but your love is one of the few things he takes completely seriously. Wade treasures every "I love you" like it's a precious gift, and he’ll never let you forget just how much he loves you back—even if he has to do it in the most ridiculous ways possible.

Logan (Wolverine):

Logan isn’t the type to be overly expressive with words, and he’s lived long enough to have lost more people than he can count. So, every time you say "I love you," it hits him deep. Logan’s used to living with the weight of his past and the pain of loss, so your constant affirmations of love are a grounding force for him. They remind him that, despite everything, he has something—and someone—worth living for.

He might grunt or mumble in response, but that’s just Logan’s way of hiding how much it truly affects him. If you catch him at the right moment, when he’s had a drink or two, or after a particularly rough day, Logan will pull you into a tight embrace and mutter a gruff, “Love you too, darlin’.” He might not always say it back directly, but he shows it in the way he protects you, the way he’s always there when you need him, and the way he lets his guard down around you.

For Logan, your “I love you” is a beacon in a world that’s often felt dark and cold. It’s a reminder that, no matter how many battles he fights or how many wounds he carries, there’s someone who sees the man beneath the beast and loves him just the same.

[choerypetal]

Worthy / Logan Howlett

summary: Logan had insisted that you wear a dress for another of Wade’s parties over the weekend. Even though the request triggered insecurities, bringing back memories of feeling like a 'worthless' creature during your time at the Void, Logan saw you differently. In his eyes, you were more than worthy—a goddess to be worshipped.

ps; english isn't my first language so i apologize for any grammatical errors. but hope you enjoy! xo'

Logan cherished these rare moments of peace. Wade's incessant chatter had long since become a burden, and with you joining the troupe, it only intensified his irritation. He often cursed himself for not keeping more liquor on hand to dull the noise. Yet, it wasn’t the endless talking that truly got under his skin—it was the way your beauty distracted him, even when you were fiercely defending yourself. He hated how his eyes were drawn to you, how you had a way of making him feel vulnerable, a feeling he loathed to admit.

It had only been moments ago when Wade graciously invited you to the dinner party, an invitation you accepted without hesitation. After all, you had helped them back in the Void, and Wade had made it clear he was forever in your debt for not showing more appreciation. Over time, this had blossomed into a friendship. But someone had other plans. The dinner invitation was merely the first move in a much larger scheme.

“They would look so cute together,” Vanessa remarked as she prepared dinner, Wade at her side. Fortunately, neither you nor Logan were anywhere near the apartment at that moment. You had called him about some dress issue, but his soft laughter on the other end suggested he wasn’t concerned. Wade knew that even if you were stressing, Logan would love whatever you chose to wear. “Y/N,” Wade’s voice came through the phone as you examined yourself in front your own mirror, turning and swirling to get a better view. A gift that didn’t go amiss when you arrived from work. Logan made sure of it. “He’ll love it. I know Logan’s not great with emotions, heck even choosing the dress he wanted you to wear, but trust me, he couldn’t stop talking about how excited he was that you’re coming tonight.” His words weren’t entirely wrong, and the thought made your cheeks blush a light shade of pink. “Also, please don’t tell him. But the dress was supposed to be a secret.” 

A smile tugged at your lips—typical Wade with his loud, boisterous manner. You heard another chuckle from him, followed by, “So do me a favor. If you two need the bed tonight, just ask.” The implication made your cheeks flush with warmth. “Wade!” you exclaimed in protest, your voice rising in defense. That was enough to catch the attention of the person in question—Logan. His voice came through, faint but unmistakably clear. “Is that Y/N?” he asked, the sound of a door closing in the background hinting that he’d arrived earlier than expected. Wade’s exaggerated scoff was audible on the other end. “No, not now,” he grumbled, clearly annoyed about Logan’s deed of wanting to talk to you. Urging to give him the phone. And you guessed it right— as moments before Wade could continue his perpetual complaints, Logan’s voice replaced his, calmer and oddly pleased to hear you.

“Hey, doll,” Logan greeted you with the nickname he’d first given you back in the Void, one he thought was a perfect fit. And apparently, it was, since he couldn’t seem to stop using it, despite your strict orders for him not to. Especially after you returned, yet he insisted. ‘He’s such a lover boy,’ Wade would often grumble to you. ‘For a Wolverine, I’m surprised he’s such a wuss for not making a move sooner. Shame,’ he’d continue, his complaints ringing in your ears. Then, with a softer tone, Logan asked, “Coming to tonight’s party?”

The hint of his voice carried all the signs of a man hopelessly in love but too afraid to admit it. You nod in response, even though he couldn’t see it, but the smallest "mhm" was enough to please him. You could almost feel his smile creeping in, as subtle as he tried to make it with Deadpool in the same room. “Good. Did you get the dress I ordered for you?” His voice was hoarse but reassuring. You let out another hum as you recalled your current state. The dress hugged your curves perfectly, the beautiful red hue complementing your skin tone. Nothing to complain about, but what if he didn’t like it? What if, despite buying it for you, the makeup was too much, or your hair… “Doll?” His voice pulled you back. With a soft chuckle, you regained your focus. “Yes?” you replied quickly, just in time for him to repeat the question, his chuckle echoing through the phone. “You’re coming to tonight’s party?”

“Oh! Yes, yes!” you stammered, a hint of nervousness creeping into your voice. Logan’s brow furrowed in thought, and you knew that as soon as you set foot in Wade’s apartment, he’d likely start questioning you. No excuse or attempt at avoiding embarrassment would be enough to satisfy him. “8pm?” you tried to steer the conversation back to the party, not yourself. But Logan wasn’t satisfied. Still, he confirmed your plans. “Yes, doll. Are you sure you’re okay? I can always tell Wade that you and I would rather stay home. Or… maybe I could spoil my favorite doll.” His voice dropped to a deeper, more alluring tone, tempting you through the phone. You liked the idea, of course. Why hide the relationship when you could just be together? But something inside you still wanted to go. “No, I’ll be fine. 8pm? I’ll be knocking on Wade’s door.”

Poor thing. He pouted, pleading silently for your arrival. First Peter and the others had shown up, but 8pm came and went, and still, he waited, his patience fraying. Even his own pacing, usually steady, betrayed his growing impatience—something even Wade couldn’t help but notice. “You know,” Wade said, catching Wolverine’s attention, “if you keep pacing like that, she’s not going to get here any faster.” Logan knew that. He wasn’t stupid. But as the clock struck 8:30, his worry only deepened, sharpening his senses. “I don’t like that she hasn’t answered my call. She said she’d text before leaving, and she did. But now…” Wade’s annoying chuckle cut through the tension, earning him a sharp glare. “What’s so funny? She could be in danger.” Ah, typical Logan, Wade thought to himself.

"And if you’re so confident, why don’t you tell me where she is, huh? Clever one." Oh, he wanted to tell him. But Wade savored every second of Logan's unease. Watching the man who once met you at the Void, now as helpless as a lost puppy, was too satisfying. Even with his head held high and his arrogance intact, Logan was soft around you, and that gave Wade a glimmer of hope—for you, at least. Then the door finally opened, revealing you—but without the dress Logan had asked you to wear for tonight’s dinner. “Y/N…” Logan’s voice faltered the moment he saw you, a smile creeping onto your face as you met his gaze. “Logan.”

His gaze lingered over your silhouette, scrutinizing every detail. He had to blink twice as he moved closer, resisting the urge to let his hands find their way around your waist, hoping not to get caught. Fortunately for him, Wade, a man of his word, recognized that look all too well. The bedroom was the only option for the both of you.

Logan didn’t hesitate for a second to lead you there. He wanted to talk with you first, even as everyone greeted you with kisses along the way. But it was Logan’s intense gaze that unsettled you, something deeper lurking beneath the surface. He sensed something was off, catching the scent in every inch of your body. It was a temptation he was ready to taste, to explore if he had to.

As the two of you approached the bedroom and opened the door, you sat down, blinking in innocent oblivion. The way you looked at him almost drove him to madness. “Don’t give me that look,” he said firmly, as his thumb gently caressed your chin, guiding your gaze to meet his. “Doll,” he murmured, his lips forming a disappointed pout. You knew the conversation wouldn’t end without addressing the missing dress. “Where’s the dress?” he asked, a hint of offense in his voice.

The truth is, you hated how you felt in that dress. Logan would tell you otherwise, of course—he always does. He worships you. But the constant pressure weighed heavily on you, leaving you feeling sorrowful. The days back at the Void had drained you, making you feel like you couldn’t resist his charm anymore. Not now that he was happy, free. “It didn’t fit…” you murmured.

A lie—one he knew all too well. After all, you couldn’t hide anything from him. No lie could escape his notice. “No,” he said, his gaze darkening as his jaw clenched, mind racing to the worst possibilities. Was she cheating? Deceiving me? Why am I feeling all of this at once? But he held back, letting you speak as he noticed your eyes beginning to water. You fought to hold back the tears, determined to prove your strength, to show you were still worthy of something.

“Doll…” His voice softened as he knelt down to your level, his thumb gently caressing your cheek. Your eyelids grew heavy at his touch, the tenderness you had longed for, not just since your time at the Void, but always. He felt it too. “Let it all out if you need to... I’m here.”

His words, like a gentle melody, were enough to make you break down. A soft sob began, soon giving way to a full breakdown. At first, Logan thought it might just be what you often referred to as ‘ladies’ problems,’ but his keen sense told him otherwise. He sensed something deeper, something more sentimental within you. His fingers gently cupped your face, and you managed to open your eyes slightly. “When you’re ready,” he said, pausing briefly as you gently wiped away the dried tears on your cheek.

“Was the dress too much? Did I do something—” you managed to let out a soft chuckle, which warmed Logan’s heart. Poor thing, he felt genuinely remorseful, and you couldn’t blame him, especially given your emotional state. You took a deep breath and exhaled, just as your mother had taught you. “I just…” you paused briefly. Logan’s brows furrowed in concern. Even though he didn’t say the words aloud, you understood his unspoken question. “I didn’t feel pretty… or worthy enough. For you.”

He couldn’t believe the words. You, not feeling pretty? How could you say that? To everyone, especially to Logan, you were like an angel sent from above. If it hadn’t been for Remy accidentally swinging his cards at you or you saving Wade’s skin just in time, he’d consider himself incredibly fortunate to have met you—and to have your scent near him. This was more than just a soulmate connection. “Hey…” His voice was warm and gentle as butter. As your eyes met his, he wiped away the last of the tears streaming down your cheek. “Don’t ever say that. You are my angel from the forgotten lands. Just the thought of not having you in my arms every night is unbearable. I know our relationship was meant to stay hidden until you were ready, but if this means embracing each other fully, I will. Just as you have done for me.”

Those words were enough to make you melt into his embrace, wrapping your arms around the crook of his neck and inhaling his familiar scent. Oh, how you had missed it, just as he had missed yours. “You know,” his voice carried a playful note that made you arch an eyebrow as you pulled away from the hug. “Since Wade suggested…” His voice was tinged with desire, a longing for more, for you to be more than just his. Logan wanted you to be his soulmate. “While everyone else is probably too drunk to notice, though I doubt that, we could have our little game.” His breath grew heavier as his forehead rested against yours, his fingers gently caressing your arm, your lips almost brushing against his. The temptation was too strong to resist.

“But what if I get too… you know… loud?” A blush crept onto your cheeks as he chuckled. “I’ll try to be careful—” Just then, the door swung open with a loud creak, startling you. It was surprising how, in that moment, Logan’s focus seemed to narrow entirely on one thing: your scent. No one else’s. The sudden interruption came with Wade’s small gasp of joy, which made both of you exhale in relief. You gave Wade a soft smile. “Wade,” Logan said, his tone a bit arrogant as he closed his eyes and sighed, resisting the urge to give him a playful jab. “What is it?”

“Is it finally happening?!” Wade’s voice was loud enough to grab the attention of every guest in the room. Realizing his outburst, he quickly stifled himself and paused, glancing back at you. “The bed’s free, by the way. Have fun,” he purred, his tone making Logan mutter a few curses and toss a pillow in his direction.

“Now…” his focus returned to you. Despite his earlier annoyance, the Wolverine was determined to make you his and no one else’s. “Where were we, doll…” he murmured, leading you toward the bed, his lips finding yours. “Mine and mine alone.”

[icarusredwings]

Clean

Separating this from my other works because of the Trigger Warnings. This read my not be for all viewers and is NOT safe for littles. It contains past mentions and discussions of Child SA, child abuse, unintentional SH, panic attacks, and emotional hurt/ comfort.

It's time to get out of the bath, but.. Wade's not clean yet. At least thats what he says.

"Alright. That's done. That's ready. Check, check, okay, now I just need Wade." Setting the plates down on the coffee table, he had even brought him some juice and turned on Beauty and the Beast for them to watch during dinner.

Today had been... Rough.. to say the least. First when he went with Vanessa he had been scolded by a parent to stay away from their child, the arguing between Ness and the parent scared him enough to sit down and put his hands over his ears near a tree, rocking himself.

He must have gotten even more spooked because when someone came to see what was wrong, Wade kicked them in the nose and practically cried all the way home after the incident.

Fortunately, he didn't want to press charges and told Wade he forgave him but to be careful next time. It was a slap on the wrist compared to what trouble he could have actually gotten into. It was one of the reasons Logan was afraid to take him there, knowing he'd lose his temper and be not any help either.

For the last hour or so, Wade has refused to speak to him. Or anyone really, the only word he said was "Bath" multiple times until he was finally put in one. Or rather, one was ran for him.

See, he was big enough (thank god) to take care of himself (mainly) but did enjoy help with his shoes and to be held, etc. It only made Logan wonder how long this has been going on. How many years has he had to do this by himself? Far too many it seemed.

The way it would work was Logan would prepare the Bath while Wade picked out his clothes. He also got to pick what kind of bubbles and small things like that, though mainly, He didn't take care of the water parts (Not ever since he flooded the bathroom).

After it was fully ran, bubbily and warm, Logan would leave him to it. Letting him soak for how ever long he liked and wouldn't open the door unless told too.

Sometimes, when he was itchy, they'd put oats in his bath instead of bubbles, though Logan had to be sure to tell him not to eat the oats or else he would.

It would be more difficult if wade had hair to wash, but since he didn't (obviously) there was no fuss about it.

He didn't need any help scrubbing his legs and arms, his chest, etc. Of course, he would play with his ducks, too. Right now, his favorite was a big mama duck toy who held 3 baby tinier ducks. A gift from Dopinder who knows that Mr. DP likes toys rather then why.

Right now (like many other times) He would come to check on him, putting his ear close to the door and knocking. "Wade?"

"Kid?"

Now ussually, he'd get a response of giggles or "Almost done!" But now he got nothing.

Again, he knocked harder.

Silence. Though he could smell soap. Not the same kind that he remembered putting in. Also a soft scratching sound, as well as a whimper.

"Kid? Dinner's done." He adds this last bit, knowing he was always hungry after the park.

Still nothing.

"Wade. Do... you need help?"

"No!"

'No' was not what was concerned him. What concerned him was the tone he used with it.

"Are you okay?"

Again silence.

He took a breath, sighing as he had a feeling of what he had to do. If he asked to come in, he would just keep saying no. Unfortunately, this was one of those times when "Being a mean ol Kitty" had its advantages.

"Wade? I'm coming in. You sound hurt."

Something that Ness has taught him was to add the 'why' automatically after the direction. That way, he doesn't have to ask, and it makes him more comfortable to be told up front.

"Nooo.." He whined as Logan unclicked the door, slowly opening it only to gasp softly. The water was a very light pink as he saw him applying more soap and scrubbing his arm far too hard.

The area was raw, bright red, irratated, and some blood was dripping down into the tub, but it wasn't the only thing adding to the water. Tears were rolling down his face and snot trying to leave quicker then he could sniffle it up.

"Wade! What are you doing!?" He asks, Stepping into the bathroom to see that a part of his chest was scratched too.

No awnser. In fact, he seemed to scrub harder, almost as if he were panicking.

"Oh Wade..." Taking a few steps forward, He tried to take the brush only for him to scream and punched him the nose.

"Augh!- fuck!" What was with him and noses? Seriously? This was the second time today someone got a new nose job from him.

"No!!" He yelled, shifting in the tub to lean away from him, now starting to scrub at his neck, that now also was starting to bleed a bit.

"Ah- Why did you do that?! Stop! You're going to make it worse!" Logan understood that his skin issues bothered him, but he wouldn't let him do this.

Growling a bit, he grabbed his cheek, pushing him away as he took it, pulling the drain too.

Trying to take it again, he held it close to him and bit him (hard) when he tried to take it from his hands. "Nooo!!" And now that he knew he would fight him on it, He had no choice.

"N-Nooo!!" He screamed, if anything backing away, starting to shake from the cold of the water gone.

Putting them to the side, Logan looked him over, trying to think of any possibility of what was happening. Why the only thing he was shouting at him was No, why he wanted to stay in the tub, and why- even now- he was crying.

"Why did you do this?" He asks, watching as he goes quiet again, staring at him with a still shock of fear.

"Come on. Get out. It's dinner time. I made mac and cheese. You love mac and cheese." He tried to bribe, but Logan was never good at these things.

"NO!" Going as far as throwing a soap bottle at him, Logan put an arm up only for it to hit the wall and bust, beginning to ooze out the conconut smelling liquid.

"Hey!! Don't do that!-"

"I-i'm not done!!"

"How!? You've been in here for an hour already!" The screaming back and forth was fine by him, as long as he kept talking. The more he spoke, the more Logans' hearts sank, especially with what he said next.

"Don't..h-Hur..." It was the last straw, breaking down into a sob as he shook his head. "Please...No." The shaking wasn't just from the cold. He was shutting his eyes tight as if he didn't want to see what would happen next and ws trying everything in his power to stay away from him.

It was now that Logans eyes widdened, swallowing as he had a horrible feeling in his stomach. "No what,...Wade?"

"Please, Kitty... No.." He began to slur and choke on his own hot, thick tears, his skin burning with the sensation that it wasn't before, the sensitive layer being exposed to the air.

"Who." Was all he said. It wasn't even a question, more like a demand. His grumbling through grit teeth making Wade shush from his crying. He was crying so hard that his screams were silent, shaking harder and trying to make himself as small as possible.

"I-i'll be good...I d-don't wanna...!" He spoke this sentence, and instantly, a propane tank worth of anger filled his body, up to his lungs with hatred as he thought about what this meant.

"Who. Wade! Who?! Why!?" Now this was a demand. A demand to know who in their right mind would ever do such a thing to him.

Opening his mouth to speak, he felt nauseous, swallowing it deep in his stomach.. for now.

"K-kevin.." he whispered, a tiniest voice practically strangled out by the lumps in his throat.

"When!? Do I know him?"

He shook his head, ever so slightly trying to hide his face into the side of the tub.

Taking the towel, he threw it over him, as he tried to calm down enough to get him to talk, let alone look him in the eye. He could smell how much fear and confusion he was in. How terrified he was to get out of the tub in fear something bad would happen to him.

Slowly opening an eye, he looked at him from the corner of his eye, pulling the towel around him only for him to start rubbing his skin again with it.

"I-hey! Stop that!" Grabbing his hands again, Wade jumped, pulling away as he began to sob loudly that he was sorry. "Ill be good" "No!" "Bad kitty!!" "I clean it" mixed in with distorted cries, pleas to be let go.

It broke his heart to hear him so scared of him. Honestly, it started making his stomach turn. Did Wade really think he would do that to him? Why would he...? Oh great. Now there was tears in his eyes too.

Hearing the word "Clean" connected the dots*. The reason WHY Wade insisted that he "was a big boy and can do it himself" each bath despite showering with him before. The reason why he was screaming No, and trying to keep away from him. The reason why he punched and threw the soap at him.

"Wade, I-.." Letting go, he groaned, a small whine coming out of him as well as he rubbed his face, trying to keep it together. But how could he? With what he just learned?

Going to walk away to call Ness and ask if she knew anything about this, he stopped, cursing under his breath as he realized the second he left he would just start scrubbing again.

How was he supposed to help him if he couldn't touch him but also watch over him at the same time to be sure he's not hurting himself if he hated being watched in the tub?

Making a loud grunting sound, Wade stopped, looking at him as if trying to analyze if this sound was negative or not. His kitty did grunt a lot, so it wasn't scary, but he was still scared of him. Scared of everyone, actually.

Sighing, he sat on the toilet, putting his head in his hands, thinking. Think! Come on, Logan, you've been around dozens of kids, right? Wrong. He just recently started to warm up to his daughter, a grown woman by now.

If he had his phone he could call or.. I don't know google it? But what would he even type? "My boyfriend was molested 20 years ago, what should I do?" No... no. Come on there has to be something in there. Deep breaths. In... ou-

"Kitty...?"

Looking up, he swallowed, tears running down his face, his own throat tight. "Yeah, Kid..?"

He pointed to the bottle that was half spilled on the floor.

"What? Soap? What about it? The second I came near ya, you chucked it at my head." He mumbled.

"..." Looking at him, Wade blinked. "...Soap?"

He wanted to say,'No, you're not getting anymore soap. It's time to get out' but instead paused. "...Why?"

Ness had said one of the best things to do for a kid was to understand them. He didn't know what she meant by that until now.

"Uhm.. Dirty?" The higher mark at the end gave Logan an opening, a chance. The question of him being dirty was enough.

"You aren't dirty, Wade. You're clean." Logan didn't move from his spot. Not a single inch. He couldn't risk spooking him again. His tears just now were coming to an end.

"But- I..." He was thinking. Logan knew he was. Trying to process the information. "B-but he..."

"I-i know... I know he did." His fist clenched but tried to smile. It came out crooked and kind of awkward as more tears raced over his face like the Nashville Derby. "You're clean, Wade. Good-" he swallowed, trying to ground himself.

"Good job."

Again, Wade was confused. He wasn't good. He just bloodied his second nose for the day (that was already healed up by now) and threw a bottle at him.. that didn't seem good.

Swallowing, more tears came to him, begining to realize what he has done, calming enough to understand. "B-but.. I bad.."

"No!- i-i mean.. No... you're not bad. You did nothing wrong. It's not your fault. None of it was your fault... Im so sorry.." Logan whispered, wiping his eyes.

He wasn't expecting to cry today, but he had a feeling tonight, once all was said and done, they were going to have a long talk later, and he'd cry more in bed.

"S-so... All done?"

Quickly, he nods, "All done... erm.. I-i made us mac and cheese so... get dressed and.. I-ill help with your booboos okay?" He says, about to stand up but decided to wait until told to leave. Any movements would probably send him right back.

To his suprise, Wade got out, Holding his towel tight around him but came to him. Very still. That's how Logan sat as Wade ever so gently touched his face, wiping his tears, tilting his head when more came.

"Kitty...?"

"Yeah, bub?" He muttered, giving him a lopsidded smile, not wanting him to be scared.

"...Are you cry because..." He trailed off, but Logan knew exactly what he meant.

"Y-yeah."

"Why? ...He mean to you?" Pulling his hand away, he seemed so confused about why anyone would care what happened to him. His parents sure didn't.

"No, Bub... but he was mean to you. Right?"

He nods, slowly, ashamed of this.

"Hey- No, You're not introuble.. it's his fault. He's bad. You... you were never bad, Wade. Not ever." He tells him, Putting out a hand for him to hold.

Instead of taking it, Wade hugged his head, petting his head. "Don't cry kitty.."

Loosely putting his arms around him, he sniffled again. "I-ill try, kid... now.. Lets go watch some dancing tea sets, yeah?"

"Okay!" Nodding, Wade picked up his clothes, running off, excited to be clean and to eat with him. Oh, how quickly his moods changed... Logan was going to get whiplash one of these days.

Later, during the movies credits, they sat in silence of one another, Wade's face in the crook of his neck, clearly still ashamed of his actions for the day and his past..

After bandaging and icing his wounds, They sat together for a good 30 minutes, Wade devouring all of his food. Logan didn't eat. His stomach was too turned over to even think about it.

"...Wade?" He says, breaking the silence as he stares off at a random wall, keeping him as close as possibly, letting him wrap his legs around his wasit as he held him.

"..Yuh?"

"..It's not your fault."

"What?"

"It's not your fault."

"I know." He says, but suddenly the room had a stench of a mechanic's shop. Thick gasoline. He lied straight through his teeth.

"Wade... It's not your fault." He says again, beginning to rub his back, feeling him tense up.

"I... know?"

"No- Wade. Litsen to me... It's not your fault. Its theirs. You did nothing wrong." He repeated again, making him start to cry as a single tear fell down Logan's face.

Nodding into him, sniffling, a muffled, strained 'That's why I carry my baby knife. Baby knives protect babies sometimes' came out as he clung around his neck, never wanting to let go.

A minute or two passes. Logan's shirt his wet. Wet wasn't even the right word. More like soaked.

"Is... he dead?"

"Good." He holds the back of his head, begining to rock him, quietly shushing, letting him sob. "Shhh... I got you... I won't let anyone do that to you ever again. I don't care if it kills me.."

"E-even if I throw summer breeze body wash at you again?"

"Even if you throw summer breeze body wash at me." He agreed, feeling him relax a little.

"Promise?"

"Cross my heart."

"H-hope to die?"

"Even if I die, just wait. Ill find that fucker in hell."

Wade giggled, letting out a sigh as his shoulders dropped, trusting him more than before. He felt... safe.

Hi. If you made it down here, Im proud of you for how far you've come in life, and I am so sorry if you relate to this.. this, uhm.. this one hit a little too close to home for me. So..

*For those who don't understand, Wade didn't 'Clean himself good enough' so kevin 'helped'. It's implied that this was a form of 'punishment' as well as wade feeling dirty from the thoughts seeing as.... nevermind. The unfortunate truth is how ever much you scrub, you can still feel it.

Again. If you understand this, Im so sorry. It is and never will be your fault. 🫶🩷 And I hope Scoutmaster Kevin gets what he deserves with a chainsaw 🥰 Fuck that guy fr

[xhoess]

The Scavenger Hunt

Logan Howlett one-shot

Female reader×Logan

You try and surprise logan with a little gift you found while you where cleaning your room. But you make him work for it.

Fluff, kissing, couple

Masterlist :)

Logan sat at the kitchen table, a scowl etched into his face as he stared at the collection of trinkets you had spread out in front of him. The mansion was abuzz with excitement, thanks to your latest idea—a scavenger hunt designed to bring a little joy and camaraderie into their usually intense environment.

“Alright, Logan,” you said cheerfully, “here’s the deal. I’ve hidden a bunch of clues around the mansion. Your job is to find them, and each clue will lead you to the next one. The final prize is something special.”

Logan looked up from the array of items—a mix of small toys, quirky gadgets, and handwritten notes. “A scavenger hunt? You’ve got to be kidding me.”

Your eyes sparkled with mischief. “Come on, it’ll be fun! Besides, you’re always up for a challenge. And don’t worry, I’ll be your guide if you get stuck.”

Logan grumbled but took the first clue from her, reading the cryptic riddle aloud. “'Where you find the warmth and light, the next clue hides out of sight.'”

You grinned. “That should be the fireplace. Let’s go!”

They made their way to the grand fireplace in the living room, Logan’s grumbling providing a humorous counterpoint to your infectious enthusiasm. As he rifled through the decorative logs, he found the next clue tucked inside a small box.

“Not bad,” Logan said begrudgingly, handing the clue over to Y/N. “What’s this one say?”

You read it aloud: “'To find the next, where the sounds play, look where the notes of music stay.'”

Logan’s eyes narrowed. “That’s the music room.”

The hunt continued through various rooms—the library, the gym, and even the greenhouse—each clue leading them closer to the final prize. Despite his gruff demeanor, Logan found himself enjoying the playful interaction. Your laughter and enthusiasm were infectious, and each discovery seemed to ease his usual tension.

Finally, they reached the last clue, which directed them to the rooftop garden. As they climbed the stairs, Logan could see Your excitement bubbling over.

“This is it!” You exclaimed, reaching the garden where a small package was hidden beneath a potted plant.

Logan retrieved the package and handed it to You. “You sure know how to make a grumpy old man work for his reward.”

You laughed as you opened the package to reveal a picture of your first meeting with Lohan ever, wade made a picture of you two to annoy you about it but you actually liked it. But you're never telling wade that. “I thought you’d like this. You always say you want pictures of us, now you have the very first one ever" you smile

Logan’s heart softened as he took in the gesture. “It’s... thoughtful. Thanks.”

You looked up at him with a genuine smile. “I’m glad you enjoyed it. I know you don’t always show it, but I appreciate you playing along.”

Logan’s usual gruffness faded slightly. “Well, don’t let it get to your head. I’m only saying this once: you did good.” he pauses "how can I make you happy now bub" He asked.

"You being here is good enough lo" you say giving him a quick kiss.

"I love you"

[karenk06ontblr]

The Merc's Instant Death By Gang Tickling

Shared this on Deviantart the other day. I don't usually write other people's characters like this, but seeing as the community is here, why not? Originally a gift for @lovemybluebully

Contains MMMM/M tickle torture (and swearing).

Note: Some SPOILERS for Spider-Man: No Way Home & Deadpool and Wolverine. This is your official warning.

“Logan? Al? Anyone home?” Deadpool called out in greeting as he let himself into the apartment, still dressed in full costume. “Ugh! What a day. First, I had to try three different stores before someone had the kibble Dogpool likes-”

“We’ve got company.” Logan interrupted from where he leaned casually against a desk.

Deadpool paused in the doorway and looked up to see three figures watching him expectantly from the den of their small apartment. The place felt cramped on a good day, but with three Spider-mans and a Logan all collectively waiting for him, the place felt downright claustrophobic. Deadpool hesitated there on the threshold, before entering and shutting the door behind him.

“Webhead…s!” He called cheerily, putting on his best casual voice. “It’s so cool to finally meet you, mask-to-mask. Actually, I’ve been looking for-”

“We know.” One of the Spider-mans said bluntly. Deadpool couldn’t tell them apart. They were all in full costume like him.

“Right! Yeah!”

“When word gets around that a deadly mercenary is after one of us, we notice.” Another Spidey spoke up.

“What? No, no! It’s not like that!” Deadpool protested. It was then that he happened to look up and froze. He was grateful the mask kept everyone from seeing the way he turned deathly pale. Even so, Logan seemed to notice the change in him and straightened so they were standing next to each other.

Deadpool whirled, throwing open the door, “I just remembered I have a fight scheduled with that new Iron-Doom-guy! You know how it is with the MCU. Wouldn’t want me to let everyone down, would you? Duty calls!”

He was just through the doorway when Logan caught him by the arm. “Wade, these guys have been waiting for you for ages. Where’re you going?”

Deadpool was already reaching for his trusty Baby Knife with his free hand. He didn’t need that other arm, anymore. It was a stupid arm. He’d grow back a better one.

“What about your rule about not bleeding in the apartment?” Logan tried again.

“I’m not the one in the apartment, Peanut. You are!”

“What’s got you all freaked out?”

“I saw the title of this thing!” Deadpool groaned. His whole arm? It was such a waste!

Logan reached out to stop him from using Baby Knife. “You’re ridiculous!”

“What are your intentions with Peter 3?” One of the Spider-mans interrupted behind them.

Deadpool paused, “You mean-he’s here?” Stupid. Of course he was! All three of the MCU Spider-mans were watching him from the den. His gaze drifted between the three of them, trying to pick out which was which. Couldn’t they wear numbers or something?

He craned his head to get another look at the title, but it hadn’t changed. With a weary groan, he sheathed Baby Knife and didn’t fight it when Logan pulled him back inside and shut the door.

All he needed to do was make sure the situation didn’t escalate to where the title happened. He could do this. Deadpool was great at de-escalation.

FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK…

He swallowed, trying not to let on how flustered he was. “Intentions? No intentions! Pinky-swear!” His boots didn’t let on that he was crossing his toes. “It’s just- I- The costume!” He settled on. “It’s just such an iconic shade of red, you know? Like mine? I-I wanted to know how he made it look so vivid! Maybe give me some pointers. No offense, but it’s the best of the Spidey suits.”

For a moment, no one answered him. Logan was staring at him with the bewildered and stupefied expression he wore sometimes when Wade accidentally got a special guest star killed.

Then one of the Spideys leaned forward, “And which suit is that?”

Deadpool stared hard at one Spider-man. Then the next. Then the next. Then he returned to the first one again-

“Told ya he’d never give you a straight answer.” Logan grunted, shaking his head.

Another Spidey sighed and aimed his wrists, “Right. Plan B.”

“WHOA! HOLD ON! H-HOLD ON!” Deadpool cried, his hands up in surrender. But it was too late. Webbing shot across the room and wrapped around his torso, trapping his arms at his sides. He staggered before toppling awkwardly to the floor, landing on his back. He struggled to get back on his feet as they surrounded him.

Logan reached him first, straddling him with a smirk. Deadpool wasn’t surprised. Plan B was probably his idea – payback for all the times Wade snuck up and got him.

He thrashed against the webs, struggling desperately, but his arms wouldn’t budge. A moment later, he felt one of the Spider-mans land on his calves while the other two gathered on either side of his legs.

“I told them ‘bout the rule ya got about blood in the house,” Logan assured Deadpool as he started jabbing his fingers up and down his torso, earning a series of snickers from Wade as he strained to draw his arms in and protect himself. The webbing refused to let him budge an inch.

“They said it wasn’t their style anyway,” Logan went on. “Besides, this seems to work better on ya.”

“L-hogan! Guys! Waih-ACK!” Deadpool jumped as the Spidey sitting on his legs gave the spot just above his knees an experimental squeeze. “Yadhohohon’t hahahaveta dohoho thihihis! Ihihit’s j-jhust a missuhnderstEEEHEEHEEHEE!” His protests were swallowed by a wild shriek as the two remaining Spideys attacked his poor thighs.

“AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! EHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! NUH-HA-WAIH! DOHOHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! AHA-FUHAHAHACK!”

“You weren’t kidding about his legs.”

“NAHAHAHAHAHAHAOSTAHAHA! AHAHA! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! EHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” The hands trapped at his sides strained to grasp at something – anything that would free his already-overwhelmed nerves from the insanity. But there was only the cheap carpet for him to claw helplessly at.

The two on his thighs were ruthless. Two sets of hands digging into his poor trembling legs, sending shockwaves of tickles all along his nervous system up to his brain. Already it was too much. He had no control over how his legs thrashed desperately to escape the overload. Logan was forced to concentrate his efforts on keeping him still, careful not to put too much weight against his lungs as wild, frantic laughter poured out of him.

“AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! AHAHAHAHA! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! NUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I-CAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! STAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”

He kicked, violent and sudden enough that it actually dislodged the terrible hands tickling him to pieces for a blissful moment. Deadpool was just able to inhale a long, wheezing breath, before they were upon him again.

“NEEHAAHAAHAAHAAHAA!” He shrieked, “MEEEHEEHEE! M-MEHRCEY-MERCY! STAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”

The hands that had been torturing his knees started in on his thighs too, because it didn’t tickle enough yet.

“NUH-HOHA! PLEAHEEHEE!” He protested dizzily. The sounds tearing out of him now were a mixture of screeching laughter and wheezing gasps for air. He’d been fighting like the Hulk to break free, but his muscles were too overwhelmed with his shaking laughter to resist much longer.

“AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! FAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ST-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”

“Okay, guys. Let him breathe.” Logan snickered. Wade wanted to slug him for finding his murder funny, but he was too grateful for the break to call him out.

For a blissful moment, the only sound was his lungs’ eagerly gulping the air. He shuddered.

“Sss...ssheriously…” Deadpool finally managed, “…oh, shit…heh-hey…Logan…”

“Yeah, Bub?”

“…ihi…ihihif…” Deadpool swallowed, “…if y-you hehelp…mehe inst-ehead…I prahmise I’ll…fohorgive you…for thihis.”

“Is that so?” Deadpool yelped as Logan suddenly dug into his hips.

“YEHES! B-buhut thahat meheeheeans nuho tihihicklihing!-GAH! Quihihihit ihihihihit!” He pleaded, twisting and writhing against the webbing as Logan let him have it. “NUHOHO! AHA-Shit! STAHAHAHAHAP! Leh-HEMEGOHOHO! LOHOHOGAHAN!”

But his roommate did neither of those things.

“Ehahahahahahahahahaha! ST-HAPTIHICKLING! Ahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! N-AHAHASHIHIT! PLEHEHEHEHEHEASE!”

It was only when Wade squealed that Logan let him breathe again.

“Are you ready to tell us why you’re after Peter 3, yet?” One of the Spideys prompted.

“Ihihif I’d knohohown youhou all whanted me thihis muhuch-” He was cut off by his own scream for mercy as the hands returned to furiously digging and massaging into his poor thighs. Logan helpfully clawed against his hips, and Wade lost the chance to reason with his tormentors.

His screaming laughter returned with a vengeance. Too exhausted for struggling, his muscles resigned themselves to shaking from their effort to take it.

“AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! NAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! SHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! FUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! FUHUCKIHINGSTAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”

It felt like an eternity before they let up enough that he could catch his breath.

“Ohokayhey!” Deadpool gasped when he could finally speak, “…thahas ehenough!...I-I cahan’t hahahandleit!...Nho mohohore!” He’d go insane if they did that again. Well, more insane.

“So tell us why you’re after one of us. The truth this time.” One of the Spideys drew a teasing hand along the inside of his thigh. Deadpool snorted a laugh and squirmed. The way he’d said it had rendered him flustered all over again.

“I wihill! I swear! Just…maybe if you let me up first…and take your masks off s-so I can tehell you apart?”

“Not likely,” another Spider-man answered stonily.

“Fine.” He turned his head so at least it didn’t feel like he was confessing to Logan. “I…okay, look. Now that big yellow and I are officially in the MCU like you guys, there’s been a lot of people online talking about us, like…you know, in the comics…people are pretty stoked about the possibility, and there was that time Ryan and Andrew kissed at the Golden Globes…so sue me, okay? I was thinking about it.”

They were all watching him again.

“I don’t know what half of that means,” one of the Spideys said after a moment.

“Yeah, ya get used to it.” Logan rolled his eyes.

“Who are Ryan and Andrew? What’s an MCU?”

“Who’s Iron Doom?”

“You’ll find that last one out soon enough,” Deadpool insisted. “Can I get up now?”

“So for those of us not in your weird fantasyland…” Logan mused, “…let me see if I’m understanding this…you were looking for Peter…3…because you wanted…a date.”

“Sure. Yes. That.” Deadpool couldn’t tell if it was better or worse that he still didn’t know which Spidey was Peter 3. He focused on glowering at Logan instead. “That works. What can I say? I’m a romantic. Besides, the fans are already rooting for us…” He breathed a sigh of relief as they finally got off of him so he could stand. Unfortunately, he was still to exhausted for any impressive flips while his arms were trapped at his sides.

One of the Spider-mans noticed. In a move that made Deadpool immediately freeze, he leaned over and withdrew Baby Knife, cutting him free of the accursed webs. He offered Deadpool his free hand, and hauled him effortlessly to his feet. Wade staggered, but managed to remain standing, watching in bewilderment as the Spider-man unmasked.

Whatever dumb comment Deadpool had been about to make died in his throat as Peter 3 passed Baby Knife back to him.

Peter 3 watched as Wade removed his own mask before turning to Logan and the remaining Spider-mans and said, “Would you guys give us a moment?”

***

“All that for a fucking date,” Logan was still shaking his head about it long after the three Peters had left.

Wade glanced at him. They were sitting on the couch watching TV, but honestly, Wade was having trouble concentrating on it. He was well aware that he’d spent the entire evening with a stupid grin on his face.

“Totally worth it.”

Logan laughed, “Ya haven’t even gone on the date yet. Do you know how lucky you are that I was able to translate your gibberish before they wrecked you again?”

Wade narrowed his eyes. “Ah yes, that reminds me…”

Logan yelped as Wade pounced on him, attacking his sides.

“Heh-HEYHE! NOHO!” The Wolverine promptly crumpled into a squirming mess.

“…I seem to recall offering you forgiveness, but instead you helped them tickle me to death!”

“Ihihi HEHEHELPED YOUHOU TOOHOO!”

“And for that I will show you mercy…eventually.”