#vulnerable l.h.

[little-miss-dilf-lover]

OFFERING A HAND. (L.H)

logan howlett x gn!reader

word count. 1369

summary. requested here. logan overhears you crying one night. though the dynamics of your relationship have never been established, he can’t quite leave you alone. and so, he knocks on your door. doing what he can to comfort you

It was a bad day. Another bad day at the end of a bad week. Another bad week. 

You didn’t even know what it was that you were feeling, what had got you feeling this way. All you did know, is that your head hurt, the pressure building behind your eyes as you try your best not to actualise your sadness. Purposefully distracting yourself as a way to manage it. 

You’re in your room at the mansion, earphones plugged in with your door shut – minimal light from the moon creeping through your window. You lay in bed on your side, legs comfortably tucked up as you listen to your music, the volume high enough to drown out everything else.

It was loud, so much so that you’re unaware of the knocks at your door – the presence of Logan on the other side. The smell and sounds of your sobs catching his attention from the room over. 

He knew it wasn’t his responsibility, wasn’t his duty to check on you —the confusing dynamics of your unspoken relationship often making things difficult— though he’s not heartless. He’s not cruel. He couldn’t let you be alone, knowing you were crying in your room. 

His knocks go unheard, though he knew you were in there. The smell of your salty tears just as fragrant as before – maybe even more so now up close.

You see a crack of light illuminate around your room as the door ever so slowly opens, Logan lingering between the small gap in the doorframe. You whip your neck around to follow the silhouette, your hands immediately reaching to wipe your eyes when you spot him.  

“Everything okay in here?” he asks, speaking tentatively. His footing hesitant. 

You unplug your earphones and give your eyes another quick wipe, hastily brushing the wet from under them. 

“Mhm-hm,” you hum, afraid of what your voice may sound like. 

“You sure?” he questions, slowly eyeing around your dim room. “It uh— it doesn’t sound like it.”

You briefly drop your head into your hands and clear your throat, adjusting yourself more comfortably on the bed. Sitting up, you cross your legs and plop a plushie atop – your comfort plushie. Awkwardly playing with the ears as a way of distracting yourself. 

“I’m good,” you shrug, weakly laughing as if to lighten the mood – make it seem like no big deal. 

His eyes hone in on your fidgeting hands, a slight warmness spreading in them once he realises what you’re doing. He looks back out into the hallway like he was weighing his options, until he glances back at you sitting sadly on your bed, bottom lip practically wobbling. 

He exhales as he scratches the back of his neck, clearly unsure of what to do.

“Seriously,” you clear your throat once more. “I’m good. I’m good,” you say, the tone changing by the second repeat – speaking like it was you who needed convincing. 

He shakes his head and steps further into your room, closing the door behind himself as he walks over to you. “Can I sit?” he questions, and once he’s met with a nod from you, he takes a seat at the edge just beside you.

“I don’t know why I’m sad,” you murmur, eyes focused on your lap. Your hands still fiddling with the fluff of your stuffed animal. “I don’t know,” you shrug, suddenly feeling embarrassed by all this vulnerability. 

He nods faintly, the act showing that he’s listening to you. It’s like he’s uncertain of what to say, scared of saying the wrong thing.

“Sorry,” you shake your head, softly scoffing to yourself. 

“No,” he mirrors your head movement. “Don’t be.”

Logan hesitates, his hand slowly reaching for yours. He clasps around it, his fingers interlocking with yours before giving you a slight squeeze. “It’s okay,” he nods, reaffirming his words.

The contact alone of his hand in yours is enough to reopen those feelings you tried ever so desperately to contain. New tears slowly forming in your eyes from his simple act of warmth. 

He keeps his eyes on the side of you, watching you softly while you do everything you can not to meet his gaze – forcefully keeping them on your interlocked hands. 

And with your spare hand, you bring it up to your face, elbow resting on your knee to cover your eyes, not wanting him to see you cry.

But it was too late, he saw it and his heart hurt for you. He pulses your hand, his fingers soothingly skimming over the back of it. He couldn’t bear to see you like this. And though the logistics of your relationship have never been solidified, that didn’t mean he didn’t care for you, didn’t like you.

You cry quietly into your hand, the pads of your fingers briskly wiping away every tear that fell. 

“Come on,” he mutters, voice soft as he adjusts on the bed, turning inward to you beside him. “Let me take care of you.”

Without a second to debate it, you repeat after him – twisting in to face him. You let go of his hand and wrap both arms around him, hands tight on his back as you bury your face into his shoulder. Head tucked in the crook of his neck.

His arms follow after you in the same way, hands grasped tight on your back as he soothes you – a palm brushing up the length of it, calming you. The warmth and softness of him only deepen your sobs.

He coos faintly, the sound like he was trying to further the comfort. His large, manish hands running up the expanse of your spine until one situates behind your head, cradling it carefully. Holding it closer to him. 

You mutter something into him, the incohesive words muffling against his neck.

And before you have to repeat yourself, he’s pulling away to look down at you. The hand on your back moving to the side of your face, his thumb gliding under your eye to swipe away a tear bead. He keeps his eyes focused on you, gaze purely soft as he flickers over your face.

“One more time, sweet thing,” he prompts, referring to your prior, indistinct sentence a moment.

“Thank you,” you repeat, a slight waver in your voice. “I mean it, thank you,” you nod and give his back a brief squeeze before parting.

His hand still cupping your face. “I know,” he says, words gentle.

He leans in, pressing a kiss to your cheek, his lips lingering for a moment before he pulls away. You hold his eye contact, smiling sadly at him as you do so. He can be so sweet.

“Um,” you start, unsure of what’s about to come from your mouth. “Can you stay with me for a bit?” 

He pauses, his features forcefully stiffening —hiding a grin— before he nods, silently agreeing.

You smile at him again, this time it's far sweeter, the reasoning far sweeter. You resume your original lying position, only this time it’s facing inwards, leaving space for Logan to lay in front.

He follows your lead, moving across the bed to lie in the same way you do – his body facing yours. You scoot closer and wrap an arm around him, forgetting all prior complications and complexities in your confusing relationship. It all felt right and how it should, just like you always wanted. Like what he always wanted.

He pulls you closer, his own arm cradling you like he did just moments before. He looks down at you tucked against his chest, his eyes never seeming to pull away from how soft and sweet you looked. How at peace you looked with him.

And as he watches your eyes flicker closed —presumed exhaustion taking over— he makes a silent promise to you both. Telling himself that he’ll always be there for you when you feel this way again.

But he can’t tell you that, especially now as you’re finally starting to doze off. So instead he holds you just a bit tighter, pressing a kiss into your hairline as he relaxes into your touch – making himself comfortable to spend the night in your room. A night with you.

you guys have comfort teddies too right?

[sonofarathorn]

dog tags [l.h]

Pairing: Logan Howlett x fem!reader Word Count: 800 words Warnings: Smut (18+). Unprotected Sex. Little dialogue. A/N: Here's a little drabble I've been thinking about since I saw Deadpool & Wolverine. It's my first attempt at writing in like a whole year. Please go easy on me. Dedicated to @eupheme for inspiring me to write again.

You love these moments, so few and far between. When the world melts away, and it’s just you and Logan. Sharing space. Sharing love. 

That gentle, sinful dance. The slick slide of skin. Dewey breaths and twin moans. The quiet squeak of the bed frame, keeping time with Logan’s deep thrusts. 

He’s wrapped himself completely around you, pressing his entire weight onto your body. It’s like he’s trying to burrow his way into you. Leave the imprint of himself upon your very soul. You’re trapped between the soft mattress and his solid body, completely vulnerable to him. As he is to you. Baring his soul before you. Letting you take what you want as he willingly offers you everything he has. 

“Fuck, sweetheart,” Logan groans into your ear. His teeth brush the shell, sending shivers down your spine. 

You thread your fingers in the damp hair at the nape of his neck. Tugging those strands when he thrusts deeper, finding that mind-numbing spot. “Feel so good, baby.” 

He shudders at the praise. Shoulders tightening in determination. To make you feel good. To unravel you.

Logan’s nose bumps yours clumsily as he presses a sloppy kiss to your lips. Filthy and sweet. His tongue slides into your open mouth, greedily tasting the saccharine moans that leave your throat. He fills you with his own pleasured noises. Deep and tangy. Bourbon and honey. Aged to perfection for a special occasion as this. 

Your hands slide the length of his broad shoulders, tangling in the metal chain that dangles from his neck. You pull him impossibly closer, fusing your bodies. He surges over you like a wave, pulling you deeper and deeper into the riptide of your pleasure. 

Logan hitches your leg around his hips and swallows your cry of his name. When your head tips back, overwhelmed by the heady sensation building within you, he watches. Watches the slack of your jaw, your kiss-swollen lips forming the letters of silent pleas. Watches the furrow of your brow, that flash of desperation in your eyes. 

Logan brushes his thumb over the swell of your lips. Your teeth catch the pad of it, tongue swirling out to soothe the sting. 

He groans, half-lidded eyes drooping more. The languid rock of his hips jerking for a moment. That knot in his stomach threatening to come loose. But he knows you're close to that edge. Can hear it in those sweet high-pitched moans, feel it in the needy undulations of your hips as you seek release. He won’t come yet, not without you. 

Logan draws his thumb from your mouth and fits it into the space where your bodies meet. You gasp at the slick pressure against your clit. The expert circles he presses pushing you further, driving you higher.  His free hand grabs yours, pressing your palm into the pillow. 

The sweet gesture, the connection adds to the intensity of the feelings swirling around you. For the longest time sex with Logan was primal, desire-based. The only goal was getting to the end, that blissful orgasm. Not that you minded, you had needs to. But lately…well things had changed. Tender touches replaced bruising force. Fiery, biting kisses turned languid. Still intense, just different.

“Gonna make me cum, Logan,” you whisper, eyes still locked on his. “‘M close.”

“I know,” he says. 

The thumb on your clit picks up speed and the heat in your belly grows. Logan crowds your space, bending you nearly in half. The movement has his dog tags dangling in your face, bumping against your chin with every forward thrust. 

A wicked thought fills your head. The desire fogging your brain. On his next forward push, you suck the tags into your mouth. The effect is two-fold. The cool metal on your tongue tastes of sweat. It keeps your mouth busy and forces Logan to remain close. 

You can feel his breath on your face, hear that warped groan, for a split second before he’s kissing you. Cool metal mixing with the uninhibited warmth of desire.  

It pushes you over the edge. You come with a choke groan, and Logan’s not far behind you. He kisses your chin, forehead falling against yours as he empties himself inside you. 

The afterglow has always been your favorite. Your body limp and floating through the syrupy sensation of pleasure. Senses dialed up to ten as you slowly come down. Logan lies limp on top of you, fighting to regain control of his breathing. He’ll never admit this, but he’s a cuddler. Seeking that warmth, the connection that’s eluded him for so long. Softness he’s never allowed himself to have. Softness he doesn’t think he deserves. 

You were the first to offer it to him in such a long time, and he’s long since stopped running from it. Maybe that’s why he keeps coming back. Giving you little pieces of himself each time.

[embbarnes]

Manhandle. | L.H

summary: Feral-ish Logan is obsessed with you.

warnings: Smut | 18+ MDNI | Porn no plot | Soft dom!Logan | PiV | Unprotected sex | Swearing | Light degrading | Dirty talk | Cunnilingus | Aftercare

a/n: I will die on the hill that Logan loves his partners a little chubby. Idc. I didn't have the patience to edit this ignore mistakes pleaseee. Reposted after deleting, reprised a little bit but I didn't bother to edit it so ignore mistakes. ;; wc: 2.4k

Logan cannot stand you for one reason and one reason alone: You drive him crazy.

Why the fuck are you so soft? Why do your hips sway so much? Why are you so doe eyed and sweet smelling?

His cock twitches in his pants as he sees you talking to another mutant. Fuck. He doesn't like it. He wants you for himself. He needs you for himself.

That's exactly what he does.

He grabs you and tugs you along, you of course go with him, being so sweet and naïve...when you're alone, he practically rips your clothes off. He normally would tease and play with you more, but he can't help himself. He's too eager, his patience is diminished.

Your soft gasp when he tore the fabric from your body made his balls grow heavy and a low growl rumble out of him. You were beautiful to him, your body drove him crazy. He felt hotter than normal, like he was going to die if he didn't have you. You made the most pathetic sound when his hand pushed between your legs and felt your soft folds, his calloused fingertips finding that sweet little pearl. "Fuckin' wet for me...from rippin' y'r clothes off, huh? You like it like this? Bein' manhandled?"

You felt your face heat up and your legs trembled, threatening to give out at any second. You stammered, unable to come up with a solid reply as you pathetically tried while his thick fingers explored your folds confidently. They prodded your entrance, making you tense a bit.

"Y'r tight, my damn finger has a hard time gettin' in here...how are you gonna handle my cock, princess?" he grabbed your face with his free hand, tilting your head up as he kissed you. His lips were warm, the taste of cigar and whiskey on them, a hint of salt and jerky. You melted into his kiss, even though he was claiming you this way. His tongue pushed into your mouth, invading you and exploring every inch as if he owned you. His teeth gently bit your bottom lip, he didn't want to overwhelm you too much, not yet anyway.

"That's it...whimperin' for me...you love this, I can tell by how wet you are. Can't imagine my cock in there...it's so tiny...have you ever been fucked before?" he grunts deeply in your ear, the sound making your entire body react as you shake. Your nipples erect and feeling stimulated by the fabric of his shirt as he stands close enough to rub against you.

"Logan...I...mmn, I have I just...-"

"You've never been with me baby, I'll show ya what a real man can do. I know when y'r fakin' too, you won't have to do that with me." He chuckled, his hand moving away from your dripping core and he grabbed your plush hips, lifting you up while his hands massages and groped the meat of your ass and thighs. "Goddamn...these things..." He threw you onto his bed, his hand on your belly for a moment, kneading you.

"Logan-!"

"I gotcha...just let me take care of you..." Logan's voice was gentle, but he sounded slightly condescending as he spoke to you, the clear teasing undertone made you whimper in response. His hands pawed at you like a man who had seen a naked woman for the first time, on your breasts, sides, hips. Hs grabbed your thighs again, eagerly holding onto your flesh and spreading your legs apart for him. "Such a fat cunt you have, looks comfy, you'll treat my dick well won't you, sweet thing? Perfect little home for it...that's where it belongs isn't it? You're lost without my dick in you."

You squirmed below him, feeling vulnerable and exposed as he held you down. You couldn't deny how hot your pussy felt, you wanted to demand for him to stick it in, to just fuck you into the mattress, but you also didn't want to admit it, playing the game a bit. Besides, Logan was clearly enjoying how you were acting, so you kept it up.

"Ah...please..." You begged lightly, your legs falling limp and allowing him to open them wider. You felt so horny by now, Logan had a way of bringing it out of you. Your core felt like it was on fire, and you needed his touch more than air.

He placed open mouth kisses on your inner thighs, his teeth grazing the thin skin and biting your flesh teasingly. You could feel the slick, warm muscle of his tongue barely touch your sensitive skin as he continued to knowingly tease you. After his painfully slow movements, he finally got to your center, his pupils blown like he was on drugs.

Logan growled deeply, exhaling through slightly parted lips as his hands came around and held your thighs tightly. His head lowered, nose nudged your clit as this man took a deep inhale of your sex. Your face heated immediately, suddenly feeling embarrassed he was smelling you so intensely. His nose buried, your wetness covering it as he investigated further into you until he was satisfied memorizing your scent.

When he pulled up, he barely pulled away for you to say something about his little display and his lips latched onto your clit, knowing exactly where it was after mapping out your cunt mentally. He was torn between making you squirm and beg, or just taking what he wanted. You were intoxicating to him, he hadn't felt his cock throbbing to painfully before, patience was not an option right now.

You made the sweetest sound for him when his encased your clit in his mouth, his lips securing around that pretty pearl and he lightly sucked on it. His firm hands held you still while you naturally squirmed around from the stimulation, keeping you down even when you tried to buck into his mouth more. Logan pulled back enough for his breath to warm your swollen bud, and he grunted, "Stay still. You don't get to move. I'll make you cum, I'll decide when you've had enough."

The tiny whimper that left your trembling lips was enough encouragement, but he wanted to push a little more. So, the smug bastard leaned up and over you, glaring down, his wet lips shining against the dull light of the room peering through his always drawn curtains. Still, when the warm sunlight did peek through, he looked gorgeous.

"Say it. Say you understand."

"I...I understand..." you swallowed the thick lump in your throat, not realizing how tight it felt until you spoke again. He smirked down at you, his eyes raking over your form and he let his hands knead your body a bit more. "So soft...perfect for me. I can really throw you around hm? You can take it..." he groaned as he felt your body, his hands moving up to your breasts and holding them, massaging and pinching your nipples like an eager virgin.

Logan moved down again, his mouth drooled as he took your clit once more, his tongue lapping and teasing the bud before dipping inside your entrance. He tasted you, groaning like an animal at your taste as his tongue went deeper. You hooked your leg around his shoulder and pulled him closer, finding a loophole in keeping your hips still.

Luckily for you, he enjoyed it enough to allow it.

"Stop squirmin' princess...I've almost gotcha ready." He continued to work your pussy until he felt like you were ready enough. He pulled away and licked his lips, "Now...open those pretty lips." he swiped his fingers over your folds and then held them to your pouty face. "You're such a dirty girl...doing everything I say, aren't you?"

He lightly spanked your pussy, then pressed his dick into your folds and rubbed to slicken himself. When did he take his pants off?

You were interrupted when his fat head poked your entrance, forcing you to stretch out around the soft flesh and allow him in. You mewled desperately, the burn of it was so addicting. "Lo...Logan..!"

"Shh, sh, you can take it." he whispered and pushed until his head popped inside. You gasped, just his head made you feel dizzy. And he kept going.

Inch after inch.

You were squirming and crying softly, he was so big, ugh it felt amazing but overwhelming all at once. "L-Lo..Logan, I..aah," you blabbered, his thumbs swiped your temples as he chuckled down at you, his body keeping you warm. He pressed his scruffy cheek into yours so he could whisper to you while his hips rocked against you, his wet head smacking gentle, sloppy kisses to your swollen cervix.

"Shh, good girl, gooood girl," he praised you in a low, soothing tone, his voice contradicting what his body was doing to you. You felt like you were on fire, pleasure was shooting through every inch of you while that delightful burn remained as strong as ever. "Y'r doin' good...so good. Takin' all of me inside ya...knew you could."

Logan's hips moved faster inside you, driving himself in and out at a much better pace for the both of you. He held your legs up and watched himself move in and out of you, admiring the beautiful arousal that coated into his curls. He deliberately made slow, long thrusts so you could feel the mold of his cock perfectly.

Every vein, the spongy head, how his cock formed your velvet walls and made you adjust.

It was everything you could've wanted from him.

While you memorized the shape of his dick, he suddenly threw your legs around his waist and he leaned over you, causing your hips to come up and off the bed a little. He began to drive himself inside at an animalistic, rough pace while he held you. His teeth bared as he let out the deepest snarl you ever heard from him. "You make me fuckin' wild, baby...look what y'r doin'...I'm actin' like how I should. A fuckin' animal."

You sobbed lightly from the overwhelming pleasure he was giving you, his cock hitting that delicious spongy spot inside that made you see stars. "Logan!! M'gonna cum...!" you cried, your fists balling the sheets by your head as you let out all your little sounds you tried to hide.

There was no reason to hide them anymore, honestly.

He kept going just as he was, knowing his movements and pace were perfect for you. "That's it...yeah baby, cum on my cock, show me how much you like it, milk my cock." Logan held your hips firm, his fingers dug into your flesh as he focused on his thrusts, driving deeper and deeper.

You finally let out a strangled cry, your vision blurring as your body released around him, clamping down on his dick like a vice and almost messing up his rhythm. Logan hissed, "G-goddamn-"

"I'm cumming, fuck! Don't stop, keep going, keep fucking me!" you screamed desperately, reaching you and clawing his shoulder blades, your hips rocking against his thrusts as your mind just focused on riding out your orgasm for as long as possible. He moved with you until he finally let loose, one single thrust in and his cock swelled and exploded against your pretty cervix, spraying his cum inside and filling up your little hole. He dripped out of you as he continued to fill you up, cum squeezing past his cock plugging your pussy, but the sheer amount of it couldn't be contained completely.

Logan's chest rose and fell quickly, his skin in a thin sheen from sweat, as was yours, and you both stilled as you regained your breaths together. You were in a complete daze, your mind foggy from pleasure and good hormones, his dick still buried inside you and felt so right.

"Good girl...fuck, my girl." he grumbled and nudged your head to the side with his own, kissing your jaw. "Did so well...down we go, easy," he lowered your legs while speaking to you gently, pulling himself from your body and watching as his cum flowed out of you. You whined at the absence of him, he just tsked and shushed you.

"Ah, don't give me that...we have to get you cleaned up. Be good for me, and I'll make sure you're nice and cozy after." Logan chuckled at your dazed expression, lifting you up a bit and smirking at how you whined into him.

"Logan....noo, just a little longer..." You pleaded lightly, trying your best to convince him, but he was not going to give in. Instead he picked you up with ease, your weight didn't bother him in the slightest, and he carried you to the bathroom.

"Clean first, then we can lay all you want." He set you down in the bathroom, knowing you were very exhausted by now and most likely coming down from your orgasm high, so he made the clean up quick. His touches were gentle, carefully washing the rag over your body and between your legs, getting all the sticky cum washed away. He stood behind you and kissed the nape of your neck, giving you goosebumps even under the hot water. "Doin' good for me...keep it up, we're almost done princess..."

When you were finally finished, you were so relieved to lay on the clean bed. Your body was much more worn out than you thought, before you collapsed, your legs trembled and almost refused to hold you up. You snuggled into the sheets, smelling heavily of Logan plus a hint of the earthy cologne he rarely wears.

He joined you a few minutes later, his strong arms wrapped around you and held you close. His hand slowly caressed up and down your side, gently squeezing and massaging you. His presence and the tiredness hit you after cleaning, and the drop of hormones made you want to sleep. Your body turned towards him, your face burying in his chest as you let out a shaky breath.

"Easy...I gotcha...sleepy girl. Go on and take a nap, I'll stick with ya until you wake...promise." He kissed the crown of your head and held you firmly against him, knowing you were going to fall asleep any second. You drove him so wild but he also felt a strong need for you in other ways. He wanted you for himself in every shape and form, you were so beautiful, and he would make sure you believed it and saw yourself as he did.

If he couldn't convince you with words, well...he can always fuck you again and make you see.

Thanks for reading - em 🌿

Dividers by @/strangergraphics | Images found on Pinterest

[reidingandwriting]

Nice To Meet Ya! > w.w. & l.h.

Word Count: ~1,900

Pairings: Wade Wilson x Reader, Logan Howlett x Reader, it’s (the beginning of) a throuple over here

Warnings: Fem!reader (she pronouns used like. twice in the very end), to be expected amounts of cursing and vulgarity from Wade, lots of cursing in general tbh, maybe a little OOC Logan, still getting to learn how to write his character well (Deadpool and Wolverine gave me brain worms so I had to write this immediately after watching)

A/N: This may become a little bit of a series! I’m having so much fun writing them since I Finally watched Deadpool and Wolverine so there will be a lot of solo & duo content with these two. This part is a little Wade focused but the next part is more Logan focused 🫶🏻

Next Chapter

You never in a million years imagined this would be your life. You were raised by busy parents, and you quickly became self sufficient. Independent. When you hit your teenage years, your parents… god knows where they went, to be honest. All you knew is you had a house to yourself, you didn’t have friends anymore, and as lonely as it was, you found a bit of comfort in the solitude. You worked as a bartender at this bar not too far from your house, and you were a crowd favorite. You always brought in the biggest tips and many of the patrons were protective over you.

Your longest regular was the merc with a mouth- Deadpool. Wade, as he introduced himself once, a faint whisper. The fabric of his mask rubbing against your cheek as he whispered the name in your ear. Wade Wilson.

He was... Loud, to say the least. You didn’t think he had an off switch. He insisted he did- but you’d have to go under his suit to find it, he teased you. He never stopped talking and there was no such thing as small talk with him; if you were talking to him, he was downright vulgar, and the quite frankly gross sense of humor was entertaining. He also flirted like it was his job. Much like the rest of his vocabulary, his flirting was pure filth that would make even the most seasoned sailor blush. And god forbid any creep start talking to you.

“Hey, princess, sorry I’m late. Too busy blowing my load to the thought of you, then remembered, wait! I can come see your fine ass in person whenever I want. Wanna finish me off?” You could practically feel the smirk Wade was sending you. You gestured for him to lean in, waiting until he was leaned against the bar, chest hovering above the countertop as you leaned in.

“In your dreams, dick for brains.” Your lips brushed against where his were covered by his mask, and you smirked when you heard the sharp intake of breath. The gasp almost impossible to hear, but it made your heart flutter all the same.

“You, sweet thang? Always. Holy fucking shit, that was so hot.” You and Wade had quickly become friends, his personality meshing well with yours. After ‘baby knife’ had somehow found itself in the hand of some perv that had been borderline stalking you at work for weeks, you found a new part of his personality. His protectiveness. He was as chipper as ever, but with the manic energy of someone who could, and would, kill someone who mildly inconvenienced someone he cared for. Unhinged, barely holding onto his minimal self restraint to splatter the guy’s blood all over the wall. Wouldn’t want you to have a mess to clean up, he admitted once it was just the two of you.

He offered to walk you home once after he’d known you for a few weeks, and now it was habit. You loved the times you had with just him. He was the same old Wade, but more open about himself. More vulnerable. These walks were where you got to know Wade, and he got to know you. You had let him crash one night, not that long ago, when it was storming hard. He had already insisted on walking you home, storm be damned, and you repaid him with a home cooked meal, some trashy movie, and a night of conversation on your couch until you dozed off, your head lolling to the side and landing on his shoulder.

Hours later, you had woken up, now lying down and the comfortable weight of Wade’s hand in your hair from where your head rested on his thighs. By the time the sun rose, you were alone in your living room, the only trace Wade had been there being a sloppy drawing of the Deadpool mask and a heart he scribbled on the whiteboard of your fridge. You smiled at the doodle and left it up, it still being up there today.

You stood at your spot behind the bar a few weeks later when someone new walked into the building, and you tilted your head. Newcomers weren’t entirely unheard of, but they were pretty rare, especially on a weekday. You took in the man as he stood near the doorway; brown hair, and oh fuck, good beard. The leather jacket he wore did little to hide how muscular he was and you watched as he scanned the room. Body tense, as if looking for potential threats. Potential ways out if danger occurred. Not like anyone would mess with him, aura alone enough to scare off anyone within a ten foot radius, let alone the hard look in his eyes.

Still, he walked over to the bar and took a seat. You offered a gentle smile, watching for another second before speaking. “You seem like a whiskey fan.”

His hazel gaze shifted up to meet your eyes, and you felt as if he was staring right into your god damned soul. It was intimidating, it was hot, and you couldn’t decide whether you should look away or lean in and-

“Yeah. Whiskey’s nice.” He nodded his head towards a bottle behind you. You nodded and went to pour a glass as he spoke again. “You always try to guess orders?”

“Only the interesting ones. Or the pretty ones.” You winked before turning, smiling when you heard the slightest huff of amusement. “Haven’t seen you here before. New in town?”

“Somethin’ like that.” You turned back around, setting the glass in front of him, propping up on your elbows as he drank. “Thanks.” He looked familiar but god, you couldn’t place where you had seen him before. You made light conversation, most of the talking done by you, but you found that you didn’t mind. He listened, intently. Everything he did seemed to be intense, like it was his default. You were grateful for the slow night, getting to see a glimpse of the man behind the bulletproof walls he had clearly built around himself.

“You thirsty slut! Of course I’d find you here.” You heard Wade’s voice before you saw him, and an annoyed scowl took over the unknown man’s face.

“Thirsty slut? Thought that was your autobiography title,” you said and Wade gasped in mock offense.

“You know I don’t read! Mocking the illiterate, how dare you?” Wade hopped onto the counter, hip almost knocking the glass of whiskey over.

“I don’t get how you’re late to a place you wanted to go to.” The brunette man said, voice low and rough, and Wade waved a hand dismissively.

“So uptight, can you believe it? Need to pull the stick out of your ass, maybe put it in-“

“La la la la la, not listening,” you sang, covering your ears, and Wade turned to you.

“You traitor! I leave you alone for five minutes and Wolvie has his claws in you.” Wolvie… Holy fuck, you were trying to flirt with the Wolverine. “And, Peanut, you know I’d never be late on purpose. Except I really needed to piss, then I got distracted by this really cute dog outside and I ended up totally abandoning my favorite dog.” Wade reached out to pat him, and you watched as a sliver of claws extended from his hands. A warning that didn’t seem to deter Wade much, but he did put his hand down. “Well, might as well introduce you.” Wade told you his name was Logan, and Wade told Logan your name in return.

You and Wade continued to talk, Logan yet again preferring to listen rather than join the conversation. Wade told the story of how he met Logan, how together the two of them essentially saved the world, and how the two of them were now roommates. Begrudgingly, according to Logan, but Wade seemed thrilled about his ‘roomie’.

It was hours later when the three of you left the bar. Wade insisted on walking you home, taking your hand in his and skipping down the street with you. Logan was a few paces behind you, his presence a comforting sense behind you. Where Wade was loud, in your face, Logan seemed to be the quiet lurker type. He’d hide in the shadows, making himself known when he felt threatened. You walked up to your front door, unlocking the door and Wade helped himself inside. You rolled your eyes and turned to Logan, who lingered on your doorstep.

“If you want to come in, you’re more than welcome. At least one of you has manners,” you called towards where Wade stood in your kitchen and cackled. Logan nodded, muttering a ‘Thank you’ as he walked inside, his shoulder brushing against yours gently. You shut the door behind you and Wade opened your fridge.

“Aww, pookie, you kept my drawing!” There was a hint of an unfamiliar emotion in his voice… something, something new. You couldn’t place it, yet you smiled anyways.

“Of course I did, Wade.” Now that you were in the safety of your house, Wade’s mask had been discarded on your kitchen counter and you could see the smile on his face. “Get out of my fridge, you leech.“

“I’m starving,” Wade whined and you turned to look at Logan. He stood a little awkwardly, and you gestured to the couch, taking a seat and smiling when he followed suit. He sat on the cushion furthest from you, but you didn’t question it.

Logan couldn’t help but study you. There was an obvious familiarity between you and Wade, you matching his wit and comebacks, but you were different when you spoke to him. You were quieter, more reigned in. Strangely not out of fear, but as if you were trying to make him comfortable. You switched between Wade and Logan like it was second nature, and the more he talked to you and the more he watched you and Wade, he felt himself begin to relax just a little.

He didn’t realize how much time had passed until Wade, ever the charmer, let out a dramatic yawn, throwing his hands up in the air as he stretched. “Well, cupcake. I think it’s about time we head home. Old man is already up way past his bedtime.” Wade yelped as he jumped back, barely missing the claws that protruded from Logan’s hand, and he stuck his tongue out at him. “Grumpy grandpa.”

You stood and Logan followed suit. Wade kissed your cheek before saying goodbye and stepping outside, leaving you and Logan alone.

“I hope I’ll see you again, Logan.” Your voice was gentle, your smile even more so, and Logan nodded.

“I’ll be around. Don’t think I have much of a choice with that one.” There was a sliver of fondness mixed with the exasperation in his voice, and Logan started to walk outside. “Goodnight, bub.” Logan closed the door behind him, lingering until he heard your locks click shut. He caught up with Wade a moment later and Wade gave him the biggest shit eating grin ever.

“Is someone melting the big bad wolf’s heart?” The metallic clang followed by Wade’s pained grunt made Logan laugh, and Wade shoved his shoulder.

“Wait until she sees what an asshole you are. Then she’ll realize I’m the better half of this friendship.” The two men continued to bicker the entire way home, both of them thinking about when they’d get to see you next.

[thinemoonshine]

⋆ ˚｡𝒯𝐻𝒰𝑀𝒫! 𝓂𝓎 𝒽𝑒𝒶𝓇𝓉 𝒿𝓊𝓂𝓅𝓈! ୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

enhypen 8th fem!member x hyung line content(s): angst(for heeseung’s but (y/n) puts him in his place), fluff, (y/n) rizzing the hyung line(unintentionally), cutesy members type: oneshot word count: 1842 (avg. of 461 words for each member)

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚ synopsis: in which the hyung line’s hearts go THUMP! THUMP! in a fluttery way when (y/n) does a certain something ˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

maknae line version

when she’s confident (l.hs)

this one can be general but to be exact, it’s when she acts like a complete girlboss—slaying the day and all that stuff. the type of confidence that’s sassy and teasing that contends with his own pride and tough facade. or in other simpler terms: putting him in his place.

“all i asked for was just a little help here and there because i’m exhausted. is that too much to ask for?” heeseung scoffs with a deep, discontented frown.

“is a ‘thank you’ too much to ask for?” (y/n) snaps back and the other’s gears seem to halt momentarily, not expecting her to talk back—with his own words, at that—considering how she’s always so patient.

he clears his throat but he’s not one to back down so easily. “that’s it? that’s the reason why you’re acting like a brat?”

his words cut her deeper than she thought it would and even for him, it’s harsh—coming out more abrasive than he meant it to be.

(y/n)’s glare sharpens and she slides the mug across the table to him. “make your own drink. i’ve had enough of you bossing me around.”

with that, her arms fall to her side before she turns to leave—until heeseung stops her. of course.

“HEY! don’t walk away from me! you think i’m gonna let you talk to me like that?? i’m older than you!”

(y/n) whips her head to him before stalking towards him instead. the same grim look on her face even when she stands close, chin almost touching his chest from their proximity. “so what? you’re older so it’s okay that you’re rude? you’re older therefore you deserve respect? nah… you gotta earn it. i figured you’d know this by now because you’re the wise old man.”

astonishment fills him at her mockery and heeseung resists from taking a step back at her bold confrontation, wanting to be as unyielding and fierce as she is—and yet another part of him wants to simply surrender and let her have her victory because dang, her temper is hot.

hot in which way? heeseung struggles with that too.

“oh, now you’re quiet,” she scoffs haughtily with a tilt of her head and her lips pulled to a scornful smirk. oh, how the expression makes him stagger ever so subtly. “you know, as much as i love your pretty voice, you’re better of like this if you’re just gonna use it to boss me around like a jerk.”

he knows she means it to taunt him. he knows that her ‘compliment’ is meant more of demeaning than it is praising—so why does he want to hear her say it again?

she takes another step closer, bodies almost touching and panic imbues more when his back presses against the wall.

her stare is intense, digging into his own so viciously, relentlessly, that he feels as if he’s laid bare upon her—secrets uncovered and he’s sure that she can see his vulnerability shining through. that is, if his palms tight against the white partition behind him and the occasional nervous licks of his bottom lip are not dead giveaways.

“seeing as you’re old enough as it is, i don’t think you’d need a babysitter to make your drink for you, hm?” she taunts with her voice light and airy, much too soft for the venom that drips through and the knowledge of that does something to him—ridding him of air.

he doesn’t remember thinking much, all he remembers is him automatically shaking his head and (y/n) shoving the mug to his chest before she strides away, followed by a slam of a door and now, a deafening silence.

heeseung leans limply as his chest rises dramatically at the deep inhale he takes before exhaling it just as thoroughly. putting his hand on the left side, his jaw tightens at the vehement beats of his heart and at the sudden recollection of (y/n)’s frigid, commanding tone and slicing glare he feels it skip a beat before it accelerates.

he shakes his head as his a rosy shade mantles his face, turning him as red as a tomato and it reaches the tips of his ears.

“crazy…” he mumbles to himself as the urge to make her mad at him once more occupies his head. it’s clear who prevails this time—and yet, he feels like he’s won something much better than what he bargained for.

spending time with him even during the mundanity (p.js)

jongseong absolutely adores and appreciates every moment he and (y/n) spend together. but what really gets to him is when she wants to spend her time together even for the most mundane of things—cooking, cleaning, having tea and crackers—all that everyday routine. there’s just something so heartwarming and touching about being domestic together.

“jayyy~” (y/n) sings as she skips through the corridor. jay smiles just from hearing her and turns to the girl—without losing focus on folding the last of their laundry—when she emerges.

“finished playing your game?” jay asks and slides the basket of neatly folded clothes to the side of the couch, smiling at (y/n).

the girl nods. “yup,” she casually says with a pop of the ‘p.’ her eyes glance at him who’s following her with his warm gaze before noticing the basket on the floor.

jay pulls his eyes away when she slips into the kitchen and starts playing his phone only to look back up just moments later when a hot drink gets quietly placed in front of him. his brows raise with surprise and confusion at (y/n) who wears a a small smile. “for me?”

“mhm. thought you’d want some,” she says and takes the space beside him. “biscuits?”

a warm, fuzzy sensation imbues and spreads from his chest to his limbs, like a drop of ink on plain fabric—colouring the dull, chalky cloth with bright hues. jay can’t stop the smile that spreads in his face, small dimple surfacing.

“thank you,” he bashfully says as he takes a cookie from her and lifts the mug to his cute, teeny lips—sneaking a side glance at the girl who sits while holding her mug on her knee, legs crossed and all.

despite his external silence, his head is loud with hopeful thinking of doing this again with (y/n). he’s already planning on making a hot drink for her first tomorrow, on buying more biscuits and crackers and cream buns—whatever it is to make her have this little tea time with him again. and again. and again and again and—basically what 2pm said.

when he’s her priority (s.jy)

jake absolutely adores it when (y/n) gives him her undivided attention. there are a lot of them in the group after all and it’s hard for her to focus on one when everyone’s talking, singing, dancing or pulling off whatever life-risking stunt there is.

so whenever he gets to have her all to himself, it makes him feel just a little bit smug and victorious.

“(y/n)~ play with my hair?” jake asks with a pout and bats his pretty eyes at her as he walks up to the girl who’s sitting criss-crossed on their living room as she watches the TV.

she chuckles and nods before going back to looking at the screen as he breaks out into a wide, happy grin—sitting down on the floor in front of her and melting instantly when he feels her fingers raking through his dark locks.

her motions are instinctive yet endearing—braiding and twirling his hair without so much as a glance—and her tenderness seeps through him. the soft tugs on his scalp is soothing, like a gentle massage and his eyes shut as they grow heavy.

“(y/n)~ can you help me with choosing a toy for maeum?” jungwon comes by and jake’s instantly alarmed. the apple in his throat bobs nervously as he dreads the idea of (y/n) leaving him—

“sorry, jungwon. i promised jake to do his hair so maybe, later?” (y/n) apologizes and wonnie looks down to his hyung. a small pout forms as he sees him getting pampered, suddenly wishing he grew out his hair so (y/n) will play with it.

but still, the leader digresses and flashes an assuring smile before leaving the two.

jake’s wide awake now. (y/n)’s rejection onto jungwon to stay with him, one and only sim jaeyun, being the main cause and he’s unable to stop the smile that stretches on his face—criss-crossed legs flapping up and down like the wings of the butterflies in his stomach as his heart knocks and gnaws violently against its cage.

“stop moving so much,” (y/n) chides playfully and jake giggles with a drawn out, chirpy “okay~”

the goofiest, cutest grin on his silly, gleeful face.

when she thinks of him even when he’s not around (p.sh)

“ooh! hoon would suit this!” (y/n) exclaims when she sees a keychain reminding her of sunghoon while out shopping in an en-o’clock episode. the said male member isn’t there since it’s her solo mission but once they watch it together, you better believe he’ll have a grin forming on his face.

a ticklish feeling occurs inside his chest like feathers have clogged up his lungs and are brushing his heart and he’ll turn to the girl who sits adjacent from him—though, separated by ni-ki and sunoo who sit between them. his smile broadens when he sees her looking at him as well.

one of his luxuriant dark brows raises at her, questioning or more exactly, endearingly teasing the girl for her little gesture that makes his chest tighten in a strangely enjoyable way and she’ll shrug with a cheeky smile. his lips part slightly, amused by her response before he turns back to the screen.

later on when the others aren’t around, he’ll bring it up again and even throws silly little jokes of “you missed me a lot, huh?” “can’t stop thinking about me, can you?” as he circles her in a controlled chaotic manner—like a little pup blocking her path.

or a cat who keeps brushing against your leg and will only stop either when they’re given a treat, or you trip and fall on your face.

“stop it!” she then giggles and he feels his joy doubling at hers, finally standing still as she fishes something out of her pocket. “here.”

dangling from her fingers is the keychain she mentioned in the en-o’clock episode they watched and sunghoon’s brows raise, eyes turn rounder and lips gaping slightly.

she actually got it for him.

“here you go. one and only for you,” (y/n) says and drops it onto his open palm.

“just me…” sunghoon mumbles much too quietly for her to discern and once again, he feels that same fluttery, sickeningly sweet feeling that both frees and squeezes his chest—if not stronger.

‘she thought of me,’ he thinks and lifts his gaze from the chain to her—ruffling her hair intensely and almost making a bird’s nest on her crown.

his fangs are showcased proudly as he beams, eyes upturning and charming chuckles rumbling.

ᡣ𐭩ྀི₊ ⊹ masterlist ᝰ.ᐟ✮⋆˙

𝜗𝜚 hi, it’s romi here!! thank you so much for reading to the end!! if you enjoyed it, don’t forget to leave a heart and reblog— they give me some motivation, ya know? but please do not spam like!! X♡X♡, romi ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

copyright © 2024 thinemoonshine all rights reserved

[kiss4noo]

the unravel of his cardigan – l.hs

꒰ 🧶 ꒱ A LEE HEESEUNG [희승] TWO-SHOT! (pt. 1) pt.2 here!

genre. suggestive, angst. .˚⊹ pairing. non-idol,,best friend heeseung x fem reader – friends w/ benefits trope. ໒꒱ warning(s). prepare to be sad. <//3 word ct. 427

synopsis .ᐟ in which you caught feelings during an intimate arrangement with your best friend.

꒰ 💬 ꒱ mi note. inspired by cardigan by taylor swift. that song never fails to make me feel all of the feels, and it helped me overcome writer’s block this time around.

if you enjoyed this fic, please like and reblog! it's always appreciated :)

enjoy, my lovely readers. xoxo, mi. ‹𝟹

soft breaths slipped past the boy’s lips as his eyes lay shut in a display of exhaustion, his features relaxed– almost leaving him vulnerable.

yet, the emotions pumped through your veins, leaving you in a state of torment.

your eyes had caressed every detail of his face, memorizing each piece as though you’d somehow forget in a moment’s notice.

heeseung had been your best friend for as long as you can remember. he was there for every milestone, no matter how miniscule or gigantic. you battled hardships alongside one another and experienced warmth in each other’s presence.

creating this arrangement fulfilled two aspects, the desire to feel pleasure, and to avoid a romantic relationship. after all, why not confide in your best friend of 16 years?

however, as time passed, your attachment grew– your heart seemed to beat only for him, the butterflies in your stomach fluttering at each movement he made.

knowing that you were just a source of physical pleasure for him was miserable, despite having mutually agreed to being friends with benefits.

so here you were, sprawled beside him in an act of admiring him one last time.

just once. before you distance yourself, hide away, and wallow in heartache.

an hour or two passed– at least that’s what you believed until reaching to check your phone in confirmation. you’d been awake since four in the morning, the clock now reading 4:57.

it was time. time to gather your belongings, maybe even take a small trinket of his as a souvenir. one to remember him by and clutch while you cried in the privacy of your own bed.

slipping from beneath the warmth of the duvet, you were sure to do so quietly and without waking the boy. he did give a soft sigh and shift momentarily, but otherwise, you were clear to leave; unnoticed.

you quickly dressed into your outfit from the night before, hands clutching onto the hoodie you’d previously slipped from his possession; the newest piece that would nestle in your closet.

peeking one last glance at him from the doorway, your lips trembled. part of you wanted to stay, to painfully bask in his affection. yet, part of you knew of the price you’d pay to be by his side in misery. hence, the solution was clear; your steps gently tapping the floor as you approached his front door to exit his home… and his heart.

after all, you were just an old cardigan under someone’s bed.

you never expected him to put you on and label you as his favorite.

꒰ 📎 ꒱ taglist. @greentulip @nshmuras @wonsdoll @pshbites

how to be added to my taglist : click here!

[squoxle]

Golden Rule - L.HS ff ✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡

🎧 pairing: inexperienced!heeseung x badgirl!reader

🎧 summary: your cute and nerdy classmate lets you have your way with him in exchange for help on an assignment

🎧 cw: corruption and exhibitionism kink, oral (m. receiving), religious themes, mentions of bullying, college au, hee’s a bit subby

🎧 wc: 1.4k

You had been feeling horny for the entire week and knew you had to get your hands on some good dick or else you’d literally combust.

Introducing your person of interest: Lee Heeseung.

He was the type of guy you could guess everything about without even speaking to him. From his glasses, the way he tucked his ironed dress shirts into his belted pants, the way you only saw him either sitting with his legs crossed at a church sermon or studying his heart out at the library.

Heeseung was the epitome of a Christian nerd, but it was his insanely good looks that drew your attention to him in the first place.

You two first met at the beginning of the school semester, but you weren’t sure if you could call it a friendship just yet, especially not with the way you’d fantasize about him with your fingers between your legs every night.

It currently 6:00pm: the same time he’d come to the library to study every week day.

“What’re you working on,” you asked, taking a seat beside him at the table.

“Nothing much. Mr. Sweeney gave me this stupid hand written essay that I have to turn in by tomorrow, so I’ll be pretty busy for the next few hours.”

“What for? I thought Mr. Sweeney taught Bible. There aren’t any writing assignments for that class.”

That’s honestly the only reason why you took Bible class this semester.

“He does, but this isn’t a part of the curriculum. It’s a punishment for the prank I pulled on Jake and his crew yesterday… let’s just say, I didn’t get away with it as easily as planned.”

“Oh, so you do have a naughty side?”

“Hardly,” he sharply defended, “All I did was swap their video game discs out with episodes of The Brady Bunch on dvds. But, Sunghoon snitched, so now I’m here.”

“Tough.”

“I know. It’s not like I don’t deserve it, anyways.”

“Nobody deserves to be bullied, Hee. Those guys were assholes and you stood up for yourself! They’re the ones who should be playing Shakespeare for the night,” you argued passionately.

His eyes widened at your use of a swear word, such language that was forbidden by your university code of conduct.

“I appreciate you taking sides with me, but please don’t call it bullying. Makes me feel all… soft, and… vulnerable,” he cringed at his own words.

“You look pretty soft and vulnerable to me,” you mumbled, hungry eyes falling to his pouty lips.

“Excuse me?”

You cleared your throat, “Uhm, what’s the paper on?”

“The Golden Rule.”

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion, “The what?”

“Loving your neighbors as yourself? You should really pay more attention during Mr. Sweeney’s sermons.”

You chuckled at his comment, nudging him on the shoulder, “Hey, maybe I would if he wasn’t so damn boring… How many pages does it have to be?”

He sighed, “10 at least.”

Having to come of with 10 pages worth of “Golden Rule” greatness sounded much more challenging than you knew it actually was.

All he had to do was write in VERY BIG LETTERS.

You peered over his shoulder, examining the paper. He was just getting started on page two.

“Hmm. We have similar handwriting,” you added, making Heeseung look at you with his desperate doe eyes.

“Oh my God, ____! You have to help me!”

“Watch out, church boy. The pastor might make it 11 pages if he hear’s you calling the Lords name in vain.”

“Ughhhh,” his Adam’s apple bobbed up and down as he groaned, “Can you please just help me out?”

“Uh-huh, and why would I do that?”

“Look, I’ll do anything! You’re a way stronger writer than I am, and my brain is in the verge of kermitting suicide!!”

He was right. Writing was never a strong subject of his, so he really did need your help.

“Fine,” you gave in, looking around the library before whispering in his ear, “If you can be quiet while I suck you off until you finish page two, I’ll do the rest.”

His eyes widened in disbelief, “What?”

“You heard me,” you said cattily, sneaking under the table and between his legs.

“____, get from down there!! This is inappropriate!”

“Says who,” you giggled, unbuckling his leather belt.

“We’re not a married couple, ____. Hell, We’re not even dating!” He whisper-yelled from above the table, fidgeting with the pencil in his hand.

You could feel how tense he was just my touching his thighs, “You’ve never been approached like this before, have you?” You asked yet stated.

He took a deep swallow, already feeling himself throbbing in his pants, “Of course not… I’m trying to save myself here, y’know?”

“Aww, that’s cute,” you pouted, rubbing his bulge through his boxers.

“F-fuhh,” he mumbled, screwing his eyes shut at the feeling, “I don’t know if I can do this, ____.”

“With God, all things are possible, Hee! You should really pay more attention during Mr. Sweeney’s sermons,” you mocked, shimmying his boxers down to his ankles.

You adjusted yourself under the table before grabbing a hold of his impressively large dick, starting with gentle pumps.

“I’m not hearing the pencil penciling, Hee. Be a good boy and keep writing,” you slithered in a sing-song voice, licking a stripe up his shaft. The foreign texture of your tongue sent pleasurable shivers down his spine.

“____,” he cried with a surpressed moan, “how am I supposed to focus when you’re down there doing that?!” He worried, looking around as if waiting for someone to catch you two.

You released your lips from his heat with a pop, “Down here doing what, Hee? Sucking your virgin dick in the library? I always knew you had a naughty side.”

“Mmm,” he moaned again, rutting his hips up into your mouth, “please tell me you’re almost done, ____.”

You grinned at the sound of his begging, feeling yourself grow wetter with each second you spent between his legs, “Depends on if you either finish that last page or cum in my mouth first.”

Taking him past your lips again, you bobbed your head up and down, stroking the remaining inches you couldn’t fit comfortably in your mouth.

He tried his best to keep writing, but with that way you were sucking him off, his hands couldn’t help but drop the pencil before getting lost in your hair.

“Fuck,” he whined, finally letting the word come out.

He started to use your head like a toy as you sucked him in even harder, “just like that, baby. Please don’t stop.”

You were surprised by how his body slowly submitted to you the more you pleasured him.

Meanwhile, he was surprised that this was actually even happening. You moaned with the gag that tried to escape your throat, clinging to his thighs as your tried to hold in your sounds.

Your eyes started to poke with tears as he used your head more aggressively than before, finally shooting his warm load down your mouth, panting as if he’d just ran a marathon.

“Shh, you’re so noisy,” you teased, stroking him to a point of overstimulation.

“Okay, that’s enough,” he whimpered, taking your hands in his to stop your ministrations.

You licked the cum that dripped from your mouth before pulling his pants back up, getting from under the table.

You fixed your hair with your hands after literally just getting your face fucked by your sweet classmate, taking in his hot and bothered frame.

“How was it?” You asked casually, sitting next to him as if nothing happened.

You tried to ignore the sticky moisture that stuck to your thighs from your own arousal, figuring that you’d think about this moment while you pleased yourself later.

“Amazing,” he said with a shaky breath, still feeling his orgasm fresh in his veins.

“I’m taking about the page you just wrote, silly,” you teased, moving the sheet of paper closer to you before examining what he came up with, “Dude!”

“What, dude?” He asked back with flushed and sleepy features.

“This is garbage!” You exclaimed, ripping the piece of paper in half.

“Yeah, I don’t know why you would’ve expected anything different.”

“Gimme that,” you retorted, snatching the pencil from his hand, “I’m gonna need some coffee to write all these pages for ya…”

“Ugh,” he groaned, understanding that you were indirectly asking him to get you something to drink.

“Iced?”

“Always.”

He got up from the seat, searching through his backpack before pulling out his wallet, “Thanks by the way,” he smiled, trailing to the library exit.

“What can I say? It’s the Golden Rule,” you replied, jotting down the first of many sentences you’d write for Lee Heeseung, the guy you just blessed with the best blow job of his life.

❀ Thank you all so much for reading! Make sure to check out other works on my masterlist!

❀ 𝚃𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝:

@chlorinecake @hoyeonheeseung @sussyjake @furious-eagle @cherrriesss @abbyizzy @weyukinluv @addictedtohobi @thatonenoona @wavykook @givemeyourtmihyun @jaeljn @hoonmywk @valennshit @19-yunalyn @hoonbby @frostedblankets @hoonsyo @no-mannerism @perfectxserendipity @chubbibish @ihrtlix @bunniesforsoobin @thereadersparadise @thatbooknerdfr @aiden2001 @belongstoheeseung @jakeybabe @donut-crazs @rizzhee @nikimeows @woonieees @uarmyxtae @rebecca-johnson-28 @they2luv1naia @isa-2007 @silcry @riverscafe @pearlwhitesoul @nikohiroshi @thatbooknerdfr @wonniewonwon

[halesbian2]

“Evil is unspectacular and always human.”

- W.H. Auden

“Good can be radical; evil can never be radical, it can only be extreme, for it possesses neither depth nor any demonic dimension yet--and this is its horror--it can spread like a fungus over the surface of the earth and lay waste the entire world. Evil comes from a failure to think. It defies thought for as soon as thought tries to engage itself with evil and examine the premises and principles from which it originates, it is frustrated because it finds nothing there. That is the banality of evil.”

- Hannah Arendt

“Cruelty is easy, and it breeds only misery. Kindness is harder, and you have to be brave to give it. To be cruel, you can stay closed off from everyone, wear a mask, but to be kind, in essence, to show love, you have to make yourself vulnerable, show your true self to someone and open yourself up to rejection.”

- L.H. Cosway

“We as a society tend to sort of undervalue goodness. It's sort of seen as sort of somehow weak and a bit nimby and "oh it's nice." And I think to be good takes enormous reserves of courage and stamina. I mean, you have to look the dark in the face to be truly good and to be truly of the light.... The idea that goodness is somehow lesser and less interesting and not as kind of muscular and as passionate and as fierce as evil somehow and darkness, I think is nonsense.

The idea of being able to portray an angel, a being of love. I love seeing the things people have put online about angels being ferocious creatures, and I love that. I think that's a really good representation of what goodness can be, what it should be, I suppose.”

- actor Micheal Sheen

cruelty is so easy. youre not special for choosing it

[solaceinbooks]

Cruelty is easy, and it breeds only misery. Kindness is harder, and you have to be brave to give it. To be cruel, you can stay closed off from everyone, wear a mask, but to be kind, in essence, to show love, you have to make yourself vulnerable, show your true self to someone and open yourself up to rejection.

L.H. Cosway, The Nature of Cruelty

[cupidriki]

ENHYPEN FORGETTING YOUR BIRTHDAY. ( PART TWO )

GENRE fluff, angst, comfort, happy ending for all~ WARNINGS kissing, cursing. PAIRING enhypen x afab reader. STAR’S DAIRY listen I know I said this is fluff but I couldn't help it.. HEADPHONES PLAYING.. 505 by arctic monkeys, imperfect for you by ariana grande, i wish i hated you by ariana grande.

L.HS ★

“fuck fuck fuck, where are you love.” Heeseung's eyes were filled with tears, which spilled down his cheeks as he felt a strong sense of guilt and emptiness. He had been searching for you, but to no avail, and he kept cursing himself out in his head for not being able to locate you. The pain and anguish on his face were palpable, as he struggled to come to terms with the situation. Despite his efforts, he felt helpless and lost, not knowing where to turn next.

But then a memory hit his head. The place where you two met.

He saw you crying on a bench in front of a gorgeous river. He remembered going up to you and offering the donuts he just bought.

Immediately rushing to that area, his heart shattered into a million pieces.

Everyone viewed Heeseung as strong. But what made Heeseung crumble into pieces was you crying. Or just you in general. You were his biggest weakness.

As he walked past the park, his heart sank at the thought of never seeing you again. But when he saw you sitting on a bench, he felt a wave of relief wash over him, knowing that you were still around. However, that relief was tinged with sadness as he remembered the reason why you were crying, Him.

He approached you with a sense of hesitation, his steps slow and cautious. As he drew closer, you could see the uncertainty etched on his face. Finally, he dropped to his knees before you, his body language conveying a mix of vulnerability and desperation.

“I'm so sorry love. Please forgive me..”

Despite being angry, you couldn't help but feel a sense of powerlessness. Witnessing Heeseung's tears always had a profound effect on you, making you feel like you were falling apart. Heeseung was the one person who could break down your walls, and he was your biggest weakness.

Your anger being torn down, you pick him up from his knees and hug him tightly.

In the midst of tears streaming down both of your faces, Heeseung tenderly cups your face with his hands. He gazes into your eyes with a mixture of concern and affection before pulling you into a deep and passionate kiss. The intensity of the moment takes your breath away and for a moment, everything else fades away as you lose yourself in the warmth of his embrace.

P.JS ★

Worry was an understatement for what Jay was feeling right now. Jay already planned a fancy restaurant date and bought you a diamond necklace.

Jay was feeling incredibly foolish at the moment. He couldn't help but wish he had the power to turn back the clock and undo what caused you to become upset with him. The situation was weighing heavily on his mind, and he couldn't shake the feeling that he had let you down.

As he was driving down the road towards your house, his mind was weighed down by a heavy burden of thoughts. The weight of his worries seemed to be taking a toll on his driving abilities, making him somewhat nervous and jittery behind the wheel. The road ahead appeared blurry, and he found it hard to focus on the task at hand. The fear of crashing was looming large in his mind, as he struggled to keep his emotions under control while navigating the way to your place.

As he made his way to your doorstep, his heart raced with anticipation and anxiety. The weight of the emotions he had kept bottled up for so long became too much to bear, and tears began to stream down his face. He tried to wipe them away, but they continued to spill out uncontrollably. Finally, he stood in front of your door, taking a deep breath before ringing the bell, hoping beyond hope that you would be there to comfort him.

But when he entered your bedroom, His worst nightmare happened. you crying because of him.

As you were sitting there on your bed, tears streaming down your face, he felt a pang of sadness and empathy in his heart. He couldn't bear to see you in such distress, so he rushed towards you, enveloping you in a warm embrace. He held you tightly in his arms as if to shield you from the world and all its troubles. Your sobs gradually subsided as he whispered words of comfort and reassurance in your ear, reminding you that you were not alone and that he was sorry.

With all your pent-up frustration and anger, you hit his chest over and over again. But no matter how hard you hit his chest, he didn't react or leave. Just holding you and muttering out a thousand apologies.

“Shh, sweetheart, it's okay..”

“I know I'm sorry..”

As you struggle to keep your anger up, you eventually give up and drown in his warmth. You bury your face in his chest and hold him tightly, seeking comfort from his warmth and steady presence. Your sobs rack through your body, and you cling to him as if he were the only anchor in a stormy sea. Despite the pain and sadness you feel, his embrace brings a small measure of peace to your troubled heart.

“I'm sorry… I love you, Jay.”

“I love you more. remember that, yeah?”

Both of you drowning in each others warmth.

S.JY ★

Jake felt like an asshole.

He hurriedly dashed out of his front door, his eyes scanning the surroundings for any sign of you. He started running as fast as he could, his heart pounding with anxiety and anticipation. He kept running, his breaths becoming ragged and labored, as he searched for you on every corner of the street. His mind was filled with a sense of urgency and a desperate need to find you. And finally, after what felt like an eternity, he spotted you in the distance and sprinted towards you with a sense of relief and joy.

The sense of happiness and contentment that was flowing through his body suddenly dissipated the moment he saw you walking alone in the rain, fully prepared for the forgotten date, It was as if a dark cloud had descended upon him, casting a shadow over his previously joyous mood. The sight of you braving the rain all by yourself was enough to break his heart and leave him feeling empty inside.

As he rushed towards you, his heart pounding in his chest, he could feel his own desperation mounting. He needed to hold you, to feel your warmth and your presence, but as he wrapped his arms around you, he was hit by a wave of guilt. The sound of your sobs tore at his soul, making him feel like the worst person in the world. Despite his own pain, he couldn't bear to see you in distress, and he vowed to do everything in his power to make it right.

“I-i’m sorry..”

“Please, baby.. Forgive me.”

“I’ll do anything you want. Please just look at me..”

You still keeping your head low, he sobbed and sobbed waiting for a reply. Apologizing over and over again.

“Please..”

“P-please..”

As he stuttered through more desperate pleas and tearful begs, he felt like he was sinking into a bottomless pit of despair. But just when he thought he had hit rock bottom, he felt a warm embrace hugging him back. As he looked at you, he saw you looking up at him with eyes full of compassion and understanding. The feeling of your arms wrapped around him was like a lifeline, pulling him back from the brink of hopelessness and giving him the strength to pull you closer.

“It's okay Jake..”

Jake feeling a sense of relief and pure joy, he hugs you tighter in his arms, while the both of you are sputtering out a bunch of “I love you”s.

P.SH ★

Sunghoon felt depressed. Without you giving him any response, he was lost and worried. Not knowing where you are.

Typically, he was not one to display his emotions so openly in front of others, but at the thought of your absence, he found himself unable to hold back the flood of tears that were streaming down his cheeks. The mere thought of being without you was too much for him to bear, and he felt utterly overwhelmed by the intensity of his emotions.

Amidst his uncontrollable sobs, he pays no heed to the concerned words of his friends and hurriedly steps out of the door. His heart aches with a profound sense of longing for the warmth of your loving embrace, as he struggles to cope with the overwhelming emotions that have engulfed him. The tears continue to trickle down his face, blurring his vision and making it difficult for him to navigate his way through the world. All he can think of at this moment is how much he needs you, how much he craves the comfort and solace that only you can provide.

He looked everywhere. Your house, your favorite shops, where you two met, and even your friend's houses.

As he jogged around his neighborhood, feeling hopeless and lost in thought, an idea suddenly clicked in his head.

The beach, with its endless expanse of sand and sea, was the one place where he always took you to help you clear your mind and sort through your thoughts.

The salty breeze, the sound of waves crashing against the shore, and the warm sun on your skin all combined to create a peaceful and calming atmosphere, allowing you to escape the chaos of daily life and find a moment of clarity. Whether you walked along the shoreline, sat in the sand, or simply stared out at the horizon, the beach offered a sense of tranquility that was hard to find anywhere else.

As he hurried towards the beach, he experienced a mix of emotions that left him feeling both relieved and guilty. The relief came from the fact that he had finally found you but seeing you cuddled up while hugging your knees made him guilty.

As he stood there contemplating whether or not to approach you, his mind was filled with negative thoughts and doubts. However, he mustered up the courage to push those negative feelings aside and sat next to you.

“I-im sorry, my love..”

Looking up at you with desperate puppy eyes, you couldn't help but melt into his gaze.

“You’re lucky you're adorable.” before kissing his cheek.

K.SN ★

Sunoo wanted to drown himself. He couldn't believe he hurt a gorgeous and pure person like you.

Sunoo is in a state of desperation as he tries to call you repeatedly. His body is engulfed with a sense of worry and guilt that seems to weigh him down.

Desperately trying to hold back his tears, he quickly ran down the street to your house, his heart pounding in his chest. As he gasped for breath, he prayed that you were home, hoping that he would see you. Which he desperately needed. The weight of his troubles felt overwhelming, but he knew that with you there, he could find the strength to face them. Racing up to your front door, he banged on it with all his might, hoping that you would hear him and come to his aid.

After what seemed like an eternity, he noticed the doorknob turn and the door creak open. A pair of hesitant eyes peered out from behind the crack, and he could sense the trepidation in your body language. You seemed to be hiding behind the door, as if unsure of whether to let him in or not.

As he stood there, an overwhelming sense of desperation washed over him, causing tears to stream down his face uncontrollably. The weight of his emotions became too much to bear, and he sank to his knees, feeling completely helpless at that moment.

“Please, baby..” holding your hands while looking up at you.

As you see him kneeling before you, tears streaming down his face, your heart fills with empathy and compassion. Without hesitation, you reach out to him and pull him up into a warm embrace, holding him tightly. You feel the warmth of his body and the weight of his sadness, and you offer comfort and strength in this moment of vulnerability. As you hold him, you feel the tears running down your own cheeks, moved by the depth of his pain and the power of your connection. In this embrace, you share a moment of pure human emotion, transcending words and labels, and expressing the essence of love and compassion.

“It's okay.. Just don't do it again okay..?”

Y.JW ★

Jungwon didn't know what to do.

He spent weeks planning every detail of his surprise for you. He knew how much you loved your favorite restaurant, so he made sure to book a reservation at the best table in the house. He had carefully chosen a beautiful promise ring, one that he knew you would adore. As the night approached, he grew more and more excited, eager to see the look on your face when he presented you with the ring.

Jungwon had a stroke of bad luck when he forgot an important event - your birthday. Out of all the days in the year, this was the one day that he forgot, leaving him feeling incredibly guilty for his mistake. It was a significant day for you, and he failed to acknowledge it in any way, which only added to his remorse.

You weren't answering his multiple texts and calls and he was feeling hopeless.

With a sense of urgency, he sprinted towards your house, his heart beating faster than ever before. As he ran, he felt warm tears streaming down his cheeks, blurring his vision. The overwhelming emotions within him made him feel like he was drowning in a sea of despair. Yet, he pushed on, determined to reach your home as quickly as possible.

In a hurry, he inserted the spare key into the lock and quickly turned it, unlocking the door with a sharp click. Without wasting a second, he dashed towards your room, his heart beating wildly in his chest. The sound of his footsteps echoed through the hallway as he covered the distance in a frenzy, filled with urgency and concern. Finally reaching your door, he paused for a moment to take a deep breath before gently pushing it open, anxious to see if you were okay.

As soon as his eyes met yours, a strange sensation took over his body - as if all the energy had been drained out of him. He couldn't bear to see you in tears, it was painful to witness. The anguish in your eyes made him feel helpless, and he wished he could do something to take away your sorrow.

Jungwon approached you and you could sense the hesitation in his movements as he took a step closer. Despite the anger boiling within you, you didn't resist as he wrapped his arms around you in a tight embrace. You both wept uncontrollably, holding onto each other as if your lives depended on it. It felt as though all the pent-up emotions had finally been released, and there was nothing left to do but hold each other and cry.

“I'm sorry darling.. Forgive me, please?”

As you finally make a decision, without a second thought, you reach out and gently place a hand on his cheek, turning his face towards you. You look deep into his eyes and give him a soft, sweet kiss, hoping to ease his mind and let him know that everything will be alright. As you pull away, you see a glimmer of relief in his eyes, and you feel a sense of contentment wash over you.

N.RK ★

this was Riki’s first time in love. Because of his busy idol life, he never really paid any attention to what love was and what it felt like.

As soon as he laid eyes on you, he couldn't help but feel a deep sense of connection. It was as if everything he had been searching for in life had finally fallen into place. Your smile, your laugh, the way you carried yourself - everything about you seemed to draw him in and captivate him. In that moment, he knew with absolute certainty that you were the one he had been waiting for. The one he would spend the rest of his life with.

As he sat there, his mind racing, he couldn't help but think that he might have lost you for good. The thought of not having you in his life was unbearable. He wondered if he should reach out to you and offer his heartfelt apologies for what he had done wrong, or if he should give you some space and time to process your emotions. It was a difficult decision to make, and he felt torn between wanting to make things right and not wanting to make matters worse.

So he did what he always did. Take a walk around the streets of Seoul to get his thoughts out of his mind. He entered a convience store and got your favorite flavor of cake. Hoping to give it to you when he found you.

The sight of you sitting all alone in an empty park and staring vacantly into the distance only made his already troubled thoughts worse. He couldn't help but wonder what might be going on in your mind and what could have brought you to that place. The silence of the park seemed to amplify the weight of his own thoughts, making him feel even more isolated and alone.

As you sat side by side, he hesitantly reached out and took your hand in his, his grip tight and reassuring. His eyes were fixed on you, filled with an intensity that revealed his unspoken feelings. He longed for you to turn and meet his gaze, to see the depth of his emotions reflected in your eyes. In that moment, the world seemed to fade away, leaving only the two of you, lost in the quiet intensity of the moment.

As you took your hand off him, he eagerly grabbed the cake and brought it closer to you with a sad smile on his face. His eyes were shining with need, and he looked a young child showing his mom a new drawing he had just completed. The cake was beautifully decorated with colorful frosting and sprinkles, and it smelled heavenly. You could tell he had put a lot of effort into finding the perfect cake for you.

“I-i know that it isn't the best but..”

“I'm sorry.. I wish I could turn back time.”

As you reach for the cake, you do so silently, trying not to disturb the peace around you. You take a bite and feel the sweet taste melt in your mouth. With a feeling of contentment, you drop your head on his shoulder and take in the stunning view of the river in front of you. The sun is setting, and the sky is painted in hues of orange, pink, and purple, creating a spectacular canvas of colors. The water flows steadily, and you can hear the sound of gentle waves hitting the banks. You feel a sense of calm wash over you as you take in the beauty of the moment and share it with someone special.

“I’ll forgive you if you play royal high with me..”

THANK YOU FOR READING! <3

-written by rk1stars

TL - @cholexc

[loverofthine]

vulnerable l.h. - energy drink

There were many occasions on which Seph had an issue staying awake. That day was like any other.

She had fallen asleep in the previous class, although when the person next to her stood, barely missing her shoulder with his huge backpack, she practically jumped up. With a yawn, she shut her laptop and glanced up, meeting a withering stare from her professor. This was not the first time she'd fallen asleep in that class, but to be fair, she had a lab class before, where she hardly got the time to sit down. And her Classic Lit class was just so boring sometimes. They were reading the Iliad, which Seph had read several times before, so she dozed off often. She'd never gotten less than a 75% on any quiz.

Seph pulled her backpack over her shoulder, stifling a yawn to nod at her professor on her way out. With her long legs and fast pace, she exited the lit building before anyone from her class, mostly because they had friends to talk to.

"Seph!" She bristled at the sharp wind, and pulled her coat closer to her body. If she heard the person call her name, she didn't let it show. The person called her name two more times as they approached, but Seph continued towards the union, humming along to her music softly. "Squish!" Someone snatched her arm, effectively pulling her earbud from her ear and yanking her off the path.

"Jesus, Ash, you could've done that nicer." Seph muttered, rolling her eyes. She tucked her earbuds into her pocket with a huff. "What?"

Ashton raised his eyebrows and crossed his arms, as if there was something he was catching Seph for. "Class?" Cursing, Seph shut her eyes and leaned her head back. She and Ashton had their final class of the day next, and she had definitely forgotten. Ashton cocked his head to the side, eyebrows tilting up sympathetically. "You didn't sleep again."

"It's not like I'm not trying," Seph protested, allowing Ashton to take her arm and lead them down the pavement. "I'm just," She trailed off with a sigh.

"Struggling." Ashton finished. They'd had this conversation time upon time, since Seph's problem had developed in high school. "I know. Class's only an hour, and then I'll let you go." Ashton was a great notetaker, and would occasionally allow Seph to skip, but very rarely. "Unless you want to go get noodles."

That was tempting. Seph, Ashton, and Seph's brother went out on payday nearly every month, but Seph had gotten a surprisingly large tip the night before, and had promised to take them out within the week.

Ashton and Seph had been friends since Seph and her twin brother, Michael, were born. For their entire lives, the three had been the best of friends, so much so that when Seph was accepted into her first choice university, Ashton and Michael weren't far behind.

Even stepping into the lecture hall, Seph felt her tiredness weigh further on her shoulders. Ashton led her towards the back of the hall, where hopefully, he'd be able to shake Seph awake if she fell asleep, which was more than likely.

Approaching his group of peers, Ashton slapped his palm against one of his friend's. He and Seph took their normal spots. Just after class began, a boy skulked up the aisle, slumping into the seat next to Seph. She flashed Ashton a look - it wasn't as big a class as most 200s, so there were plenty of empty seats - but he said nothing, just lifted his shoulders. The stranger next to her kept his head down and didn't carry any books, just pulled out his phone and began scrolling through something.

"Seph." Seph wrinkled her nose, nestling further into her bed. Priya had been warned not to wake her, unless there was blood, or unless she was late, but Seph couldn't hear her alarm clock, so she figured she had time. "Seph." Priya called again, more urgently this time. If it had been worthy of waking up, she would have been yelling, so Seph drowned her out and turned away. Her bed smelled different, but a good different. Priya muttered something, but in her, for once, peaceful slumber, Seph continued tuning her out. "Kore!" Priya didn't know that name. As a matter of fact, the only people who knew that name were Ashton and Michael.

Seph jolted up. She was still in the lecture hall, but it had mostly cleared out. The only people around were Ashton and his friends, and the stranger, who stared at Seph with an amused look. Her cheeks heated, and she stood instantly.

The guy, who she hadn't been able to see before, was shockingly attractive, with eyes she would describe as the color of her walls at home - aegean blue - and curly blond hair. Seph was sure she'd seen him around before, but couldn't be sure until he stood. He was over six feet tall, and towered over Ashton, who still sat.

"Sorry about that, man." Ashton said, hurriedly, as he stood. "Um, if you want to sit here next time, I'll make sure Seph doesn't sleep on you again." He continued, offering a chuckle as he nudged Seph's shoulder.

"Yeah, sorry." She muttered, avoiding the stranger's gaze.

The boy waved their apologies off, and finally met Seph's eyes. "It's all good." Seph hadn't been expecting such an easygoing grin. "It wasn't that bad, actually," His grin turned a bit more mischievous. "At least, until the drooling." With a soft chuckle, he spun on his heel and started back down the aisle towards the door, only lifting a hand in farewell when Ashton said goodbye.

"Oh my God." Seph muttered, falling back into her seat and burying her head in her hands.

Ashton laughed softly, leaning down to pat her on the back. "Kore, it's okay. I don't think he was mad." He assured her, once all of his friends had gone.

With a withering look, Seph turned her glare to Ashton, scowling at him. "And stop calling me that, I hate it." Only her family called her Kore, related to the fact that her mother was overly enthused with Greek literature. Ashton only knew because he was almost always at their house, and overheard her and Michael's parents using it.

"Maybe if you pay attention better I wouldn't have to use it." He retorted with a grin. Seph deflated, and with a cackle, he pulled her up. "C'mon, Mike'll meet us at your dorm." He said, pulling her down the aisle.

"What's the matter with you?" Michael asked with a chuckle as Seph and Ashton approached. His grin widened as they got closer, and he wrapped his arm around his sister's shoulders. "Don't pout, Squish." He urged, nudging her gently when she reached out to scan her keycard.

Seph tried to tune the boys out as she stalked down the corridor to her room. She did, however, pick up on the fact that Ashton definitely clued Michael in to at least some of what happened, or she figured from the raucous laugh Michael let out at one point.

"Stay." She ordered, upon swinging the door to her dorm open. Ashton and Michael inched up to the doorway, but obeyed, only peering into the room.

Seph and her roommate, Priya, had an odd relationship. They weren't really friends, but they got along well, and Priya let Michael and Ashton come over every now and then, but she preferred to have their room as a sanctuary. For once, Seph was actually a little happy to have a reason to have a place to herself. She and Michael had always shared a room, and the only time she could recall having a room to herself was when their parents took them and Ashton on a trip, and Michael and Ashton had shared a room.

"Hey, are you working tonight?" Priya asked, looking up from her desk. Both of them were good studiers, but Seph worked a lot more than Priya did. "I didn't expect to see you back here."

"I'm going out to eat with Mike and Ash, you want to come?" Seph offered, dropping her backpack at the foot of her bed. It was still made from the two days prior.

For once, Priya nodded and stood, abandoning the notes she'd been working on. "You wouldn't believe how weird this day has been." She sighed, grabbing her purse from where both of theirs hung in the closet.

"Oh, I think it's been a weird day for us all." Seph chuckled, mimicking Priya's actions to grab her own purse.

"That took forever." Michael muttered, once Priya and Seph emerged, groaning as if it hadn't been less than five minutes since Seph had gone in. "Hey, Priya." He nodded in greeting as the four of them started down the hallway. A few girls poked their heads out to greet Seph and Priya as they passed, but Michael, who knew almost everyone, greeted everyone who came down the hall. Several of them he knew because his and Ashton's dorm was the floor just above.

~

"So, Kei was talking about this new gaming bar that just opened up." Ashton said once they had settled into their table at Seph's favorite noodle bar.

Priya looked up from the menu with a bemused grin. "Yeah, have you forgotten that none of us can drink yet?" She asked, grin widening as Seph chuckled and bumped her fist against Priya's.

Ashton scowled and flicked a crumpled up piece of paper across the table to Priya. "Anyway," He continued, rolling his eyes. "They have some fun mocktails," He emphasized, turning to glare at Priya, who chuckled and looked away. "But you can just grab a table and they have games you can play."

"There's also this movie I wanted to go see," Michael said, nearly interrupting Ashton. He turned to Seph, and bumped her shoulder with one of his knuckles. "It's an adaptation of that book, you know the one," He paused and turned to Ashton. "We used to read it all the time." Both Ashton and Seph shrugged, glancing at each other. "Oh, whatever, it's out now, and I think we should go see it." He finished, flapping his hand unconcerned.

"Well, anyway, Seph, I'm surprised you got the night off of work." Priya observed, taking a sip of the juice the waiter had brought.

It was rare that there was a day Seph didn't work, even more than Ashton, who worked at the same restaurant. She nodded at a person who walked in, her lab partner from freshman year, before responding. "Yeah, I covered for Lucy a few days last week, so she took today, and she's taking tomorrow too."

Chuckling, Ashton patted his friend's head. "Lucky you, with a free day, all to yourself. And some of us have to come in early." Seph covered her mouth to prevent laughing too loudly. "You'd think my manager would like me more." She could no longer control her giggles, and glanced up at Ashton, chuckling rather carelessly. Seph was one of the team leads at their restaurant, and since she was a student, it fell to her to schedule everyone from the same school, and although it was not a targeted offense to schedule Ashton to come in early, he really liked to milk it.

"Calum! Hey, mate, good to see you." Michael said, over the top of Ashton and Seph's heads. They had to turn behind them to find a familiar face.

Seph stared at the boy from earlier, who looked the same as before, save for a band aid on the top of his cheek. He and his friend, apparently, recognized Michael based on the way they grinned and waved. Despite their grins, Seph's cheeks burned, and she spun back around in her chair to sink down, hoping the boy wouldn't recognise her. Priya cocked her head to the side, but Seph just shook her head.

Twin telepathy was definitely not a thing, based on the way that Michael waved the unfamiliar pair over. When Seph kicked him harshly in the shin, Michael only cursed, but said nothing else.

"'Sup, Luke?" Michael greeted, pulling his friend in for a swift hug and bumping his fist against the other boy's fist. "You guys want to eat with us?" He offered, gesturing to the empty table next to theirs. "We only just ordered."

The two boys glanced at one another before shrugging. The shorter one went to find a waiter to make sure they could move the tables together, and once he had gotten approval, he came back to move the table closer. Seph sunk further in her chair, hoping Ashton might get the memo and offer to move.

"Luke, Cal, this is Ashton," Michael introduced, once the newcomers had taken their seats. Luke sat next to Seph, thanks to Michael's persuasion, despite his sister's silent glare. Ashton reached over Seph's head to wave at the two.

"I'm Calum, and Luke's over there pouting." Calum said with a chuckle, nodding to Luke, who had his nose buried in his phone. "He's had a rough go of it today." He whispered, as if Luke couldn't hear any of them.

Luke, with a glare in Calum's direction, finally put his phone away and looked to Ashton, to finally greet him. He recoiled shortly in surprise, pointing at Ashton. "Oh, hey, it's you. Long time no see." He glanced down at the girl trying her hardest to become invisible. "Sleeping Beauty, napping again?"

Michael glanced between Luke, Ashton, and Seph, turning to Priya to lift his eyebrows in confusion, but she only shrugged. "You know each other?"

Seph buried her head in her hands, and Ashton patted her shoulder, looking to Luke to explain. "We met in class earlier." He summarized, glancing down at Seph, who still avoided eye contact.

"Oh, well, Calum, this is my sister, Seph." Michael said, after an awkward pause.

"Steph?"

"Seph." Ashton interrupted, before Michael could correct him. "No t."

Calum turned to Seph, who kept her head down, only glancing up slightly to wave. "Seph's an interesting name. Is it short for something?"

Seph looked up, suddenly, at Ashton, who was grinning. "Oh, why, yes, actually," He began, with a wide grin. Michael and Seph shared a frantic look and Ashton was cut off by both of Seph's hands coming up to cover his mouth. His words were muffled by her hands, and Priya was the only one to actually know what he had said, but it wasn't news to her.

"Ashton Irwin, I swear to God." She warned, fixing him with a stoney glare. "We've been over this." Seph hated her full name, possibly even more than she hated Kore, but it was Ashton's favorite thing to tease her about.

~

"C'mon, Squish, it's not that hot." Michael teased, leaning across the table to smirk at his sister.

Seph scowled, setting her drink down on the table with a thud. "You wanna try it?" She dared, pushing her bowl towards him. Seph had the highest pain tolerance of several of them, except maybe Priya, who tended to stay away from spicy things, anyway. Because of this, she had ordered the spiciest ramen available, but most of the ramen she enjoyed wasn't so bad.

Michael immediately paled and shook his head. Priya mimicked his action when Seph glanced at her, nodding towards the noodles. "I'll keep some taste buds today." She said, sharing a giggle with Ashton.

"I'll try it."

Seph turned to Luke, not expecting him to have volunteered. He had remained mostly silent for the duration of their meal, and she couldn't help but worry if it was her fault. Based on the cocky grin he wore, she deduced it was probably not.

"It's probably not that bad." He tempted, inching towards Seph. She glanced around, but everyone else was entranced by a story Priya was telling. "So, c'mon, Princess." He said, eyebrows cocking upwards. "Or are you worried it's not that bad?"

"Go ahead." Seph retorted, pushing the bowl towards Luke, leaning back in her chair. Silently, he shook his head and pointed towards his mouth. Seph arched an eyebrow. He wasn't really going to make her feed him.

After a moment of staring each other down, Seph sighed, and resolved to making Luke a bite, offering him her spoon. He, begrudgingly, accepted the spoon from her hands and took a bite, returning it to her. For a moment, his grin remained steady, leaning back in his own seat. After a few more beats, however, his grin shook, and he turned away to gulp. At this, Seph giggled, covering her mouth and taking another bite of her noodles.

"So, is she overreacting?" Calum asked his friend, leaning forward with a grin that he shared with Seph.

Luke leaned back and crossed his arms, and he would've looked cool - Seph thought he had a cocky aura that made him attractive - if it weren't for his red cheeks. "Yeah, it's fine." He panted, fingers drumming on the table. He was not good with spice, and had gotten much too over his head.

Seph shook her head, chuckling as she leaned her chin on her hand, watching Luke's face redden. "Hot enough for you, Princess?" She teased, biting her lip in a grin when his eyes watered. If it had been Ashton or Michael, she would have been crying with laughter, but she didn't know Luke nearly as well, and although he had teased her, she didn't feel like doing the same. For the most part.

"You know what?" Luke croaked after downing an entire glass of water. He pointed his long finger at Seph, close enough that the tip of his finger brushed the tip of her nose, which raised her eyebrows, but neither of them said anything more about it. "You-" He cut himself off, ducking his head to avoid anyone seeing his eyes water with the heat. "Goddamn."

"What'd you do to him, Squish?" Ashton asked upon the collective realization that Luke was suffering over something. Calum had watched the interaction with rapt attention, but Ashton, Michael, and Priya had been chatting about something completely unrelated.

Seph shrugged, leaning back in her seat. "Nothing that he didn't deserve." At that, Luke turned up to scowl at her, and a pang of guilt shot through her stomach. "Sorry, dude." She offered, carefully glancing down at Luke.

"So, Seph, what's your major?" Calum asked, leaning his head on his hand to grin at her. Luke was still struggling, but he was generally pushed to the side, except for Michael, who was nearly crying with laughter. "Mike mentioned you're here on a scholarship."

With a glare towards Michael – who didn't even recognize his sister's stare – Seph glanced back towards Calum. "Yeah, I'm actually double majoring in musical theater and classics." Or, as hers and Michael's grandmother referred to it, the two most useless majors.

"Oh, so you sing?" Calum continued, disregarding the poisonous way Ashton was staring at him.

Seph's cheeks reddened, and she ran a hand through the ends of her hair. "Uh, yeah. I guess."

"That's really cool. You know-"

"Squish, did you see the gaming bar Kei was talking about?" Ashton interrupted, grabbing Seph's arm to pull her towards him, thrusting his phone in her face. He scowled at Calum, but if the latter noticed, he didn't react.

Nodding absent-mindedly, Seph scrolled through the listing. "Yeah, looks really cool, Ash. We should go tonight." She turned her attention back to Calum. "D'you two wanna come to this bar with us later?"

Luke finally looked up, eyes raking over Seph, and then to Michael. "Are you even old enough to drink?" He asked with a soft chuckle.

Seph scowled, arching an eyebrow. "It's a gaming bar." Suddenly, she empathized with Ashton for Priya's prior teasing. "You know, with games?"

"We'd love to join." Calum said, before Luke could fire back the retort that waited on the tip of his tongue. "But I work early, so I'll probably have to leave before midnight."

"Oh, we all do." Michael assured him with a confident grin.

"Except for Seph. You can stay out all night." Priya added, grinning at her roommate, which earned her a scowl. They both knew Seph was going home and sleeping for forever. If she could fall asleep. "So, which club are you going to?" She teased, sticking her tongue out at Seph, who responded in kind.

Seph sighed, and rolled her eyes. "Luke's also free tonight, maybe you two should do something." Calum added, before Seph could refuse. At Luke's scorn, Calum defensively raised his hands. "Dude, it's a joke, you guys don't have to."

Scowling, Seph nudged Ashton over to slip out of the hightop. "I'm going to wash my hands." She grumbled, tossing her hair over her shoulder before heading away from the table.

The restroom was peacefully quiet, with the exception of soft music playing over the speakers. Seph leaned down to splash her face with cool water, sighing softly and running a hand through her hair. She hadn't been able to rest at all, even on the bus, when she could normally fall asleep on Ashton for a minute, so the cool water was to combat the sagging of her eyelids, as well as the warm cheeks that were a side effect of the spicy noodles.

She poked at the bags permanently under her eyes, made worse by her lack of sleep, sighing when they didn't magically disappear. With a sniff, she leaned back, pulling her ponytail out to shake her hair down her back.

Seph should've had an energy drink before she left that morning.

[itsthe-neo-zone]

Hurt me like hell - L.HS 

lee heeseung x reader

TW: 18+ Sexual content, Corruption, mentions of making out, fingering, biting, mentions of voyeurism, mentions of blood, choking, supernatural au, vampire heeseung au!, 

please proceed with caution 18+ content ahead, do not read if you are underage. 

It wasn’t safe, but then again you never thought of safety when you thought of him. the only feeling that came to mind was the euphoric dream, the sensual realm of his existence, 

lee heeseung was a drug you wouldn’t ever be able to give up.

Blood was your life source, the glowy rare liquid was scarce. In a world where it ran through your veins if you were a being of normality. A day walker, you were vulnerable, but you always knew that wasn’t your realm. Even if you were born into it.

But the rest of humanity didn’t get a taste of the mind numbing, brain inducing high that was heeseung.

When there was a choice between listening to your salvation, the truth in his world and following the righteous path or being killed for breaking the simple rules of your kind, you’d very much take the trip down to the obsidian pits of doom.

You’d gladly fall down, off grace and sin for him. Breaking each and every rule let you feel more and more pleasure.

With each cry for help and beg from your family to go back to the good ways you became more and more corrupted. Your purity and innocence robbed away from you with full consent.

Like now, you were currently smashed against your childhood rooms wall thrashing against it as whines and screams of pleasure left your lips. 

At the beginning you were more cautious of the lewd sounds leaving your room, but then you realised the red eyed demon before you wasn’t going to allow that.

“Come on sweetheart, let me hear every single inch of virtue leave your soul.” His voice surpassed the physics of this world ringing inside your head.

The smirk was evident on his face, burying his head into your neck, the gush of blood was so close, heeseung licked a stripe up following the flow of the flooding veins.

“Your blood, it’s absolutely exquisite.” Slipping his fingers down he touched you where you needed the most, the pain eased it's sharp panging slowly dissipating as he turned the uncomforting into an intense surge of pleasure.

Throwing your head back, it slams against the wall. “Please.” You barely gasp, “Take me, please.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll do more than that, i’ll break you. Steal every inch of you for myself.” he hissed the last part almost as a reminder to himself, Heeseung’s eyes flashed red, you could barely see clearly, his lips snatching every breath and moan that left your soft lips. Grasping your jaw, he moved his lips against yours, not giving you a second to register anything that’s happening.

Your eyes fluttered open trying to focus but heeseung was overwhelming you. His entire existence demanded your attention.  

“Look at you,” he chuckled baring his perfect pearly teeth, “All broken and helpless for me.” He feigned sorrow for a moment “All for me.” mumbling, a hand sneaking up. His long bony fingers wrapping around your supple neck fitting like a necklace of bones made to be worn by you. Peering up at him you could see his towering figure.

His eyes were diluted brewing with desire, fangs already so close to piercing the last barrier that was his bottom lip as he tried to regulate his breathing.

“Good girl,” he whispered hearing your moans go more breathier as he tightened.

“Yes- ple… please, more--” the gratification you were getting from watching him look down at you and pleasure you hungrily, was intense. Almost enough to make you squirt like a pervert.

“Getting off to this?” his fingers tightened even more, at this point he could feel your insides,  “Having the door of your room open? Hmm? knowing I could destroy you right now?” he grinned, watching you fight for the last bit of air left.

He sighed, letting go almost instantly as he breathed right at your lips sharing his own breath. Heeseung wanted you as his, an immense feeling of dominance surged through him, wanting to mark you from the inside not just the outside.

You felt him consume you, your knees getting weaker by the minute. Heeseungs fingers travelled down the expanse of your torso, sending shivers up your back. He hoisted you up pushing against the wall to keep you up.

You closed the barrier pushing your lips against him, he pushed yours open giving him access to your tongue, clashing together, teeth pushing against his sharp ones.

Who knew sinning was so euphoric, it almost felt illegal that you were going to be denied all of this pleasure.

Breaking the kiss. Arms wrapped around him. “Please fuck me.” Your eyes immersed in his crimson ones.

“Please,”

“My pleasure,” he whispered smirking as he prepared himself to push into you. You dropped your head feeling him enter you.

“Shit, so tight.”

Your forehead was resting against his shoulder, breathing sharply as you clawed at his clothes feeling the stretch, he kept pushing in, “Taking me so well. Fuck, princess.”

Once he was at the hilt, only then did heeseung notice that his left shoulder was wet. your tears were soaking in a little patch of his unbuttoned shirt.

“Hush, you’re doing so well for me.” He rubs your back soothingly, underneath your ripped top. He gave you a moment to adjust to his size.

Heeseung couldn’t help but grin like a creep, god did it turn him on even more seeing you cry. So weak and fragile.

He lifted your head unable to control the thirst he has anymore.

Heeseung watched your tears fall down your face as he pushed you farther up, fuck it fuelled him even more looking at your flushed expression and puffy eyes.

Nuzzling your neck, he kisses the skin above the main artery. “Close your eyes.”

You do as he says, the tears momentarily stopping. You take in a sharp inhale. But as soon as you do the exhale comes out in the form of a sensual moan. The pain felt below no longer remembered as he distracts you with the euphoric daze of being drank from.

Sparks erupted from beneath your eyelids. The heavy feeling you once felt being lifted up no longer there as your fingers grasped onto him, you were anxious this emotion would be taken away from you along with all the other feelings you had felt a moment ago.

“Fuck Hee yes, yes. m-mmore--uh.” He smirked at the sounds you were letting out. Heeseung started moving inside of you, his hips thrusting upwards slightly.

“Heeeh--s-seung.” You drawled out his name, fingers finding grasp in his hair at the nape of his head. You pulled him closer moving your head farther to the side to allow him access.

He sucked at the last bit, before pulling out his fangs, leaving you dazed. Your eyes had clouded slightly. Not noticing the horrendous sight of your oldest brother Jake at your doorway.

He grinned at him flashing his eyes red again. Lips smeared with your crimson blood.

“He’s a vampire.” he gasped. Your brother tried entering but heeseung had blocked the doorway. the inpenetrable force pushing him back. 

He was unable to enter and save your innocence. Jake trembled back, seeing your eyes flash black. You were a lost cause in your parents eyes, a child that fell into darkness.

Your whines increased in volume when heeseung started moving faster pistoling into you deeper.

“Can you feel me princess?” he pulled your fingers lower right above him sheathed letting you feel the length of him inside you.

you mumble unable to form coherent words. “I fuck you so well you’ve turned completely dumb?” you nod mindlessly, moans and whines shamelessly leaving your lips. You strained to stop yourself from reaching your high so soon.

“No words because you’re too fucked out from my cock?” he licked his lips, pushing your hair aside as he bit down onto your collarbone.

You felt the knot slowly begin to coil and tangle itself with each thrust, he groaned into your ear gulping down the blood that was seeping down your skin.

“I—Heeseu-uh. I’m, fuck I’m going to—”

“I know baby, I know.” He thrusted a few more before watching the coil inside you unravel speedily and burst.

“Cum for me princess,” Riding out your high, you hold onto him tightly, moaning his name as you’ve been reduced to the few syllables.

Blood smeared across the two of you as he threw his head back, clutching you tightly he thrusted into you a few more times his low growls were heavenly as you watched him fall back into his high. “Please fill me.” 

Releasing his seeds inside you deeply he painted your inner walls, marking you his.

You whine feeling filled to the brim. Heeseung continues fucking himself into you deeper, screams of overstimulation left you as you gripped onto his shoulders tighter holding yourself up. 

your fingers grabbed onto anything you could find nails digging crecents into his supple skin and the flesh of your palms. 

lips tight and pressed toegether making the peach rose colour slowly drain. 

You drop your forehead down against his kissing him deeply. Trying to convey every feeling you hold for him inside you that can possibly be felt from a mortal. Passionate and intense and everything you wanted it to be, he softly smirked against you.

Message received.

“I love you, Heeseung.” You whisper shuddering from the empty shallow feeling you get once he slips out.

“Love you too ____.” He bit down onto your lips, pulling slightly before reluctantly releasing. Letting you down and onto your feet he lets go for a second only to catch you again from dropping instantly to the floor.

“My legs—” “Yeah, my bad.” He slyly grinned lifting you upwards.

“Guess I just fuck you too well.” Your face heats up at his words. 

So to reiterate again, if you were ever given a choice between anything, everything and heeseung, there was no question you’d pick heeseung.

And you’d gladly fall from grace for him a million more times if necessary.  

~~~~~

(First time writing something smut related, give me a break over it, this was super rushed too lol.

Also safe sex is the best sex, use protection pls)

Seola - It’s the neo zone © All rights reserved.

[heartcal]

“who do you believe?”; l.h. (pt. ii)

oh my GOD it’s here, it took longer than expected but she’s finally here! after the eye strain i got a sty so that threw me in for a loop, but the good news is my eyes are better! and i’m fully vaccinated too! please get the vaccine if you are able to :^) enjoy!

a/n: (formatting again lol) there’s a part where there’s supposed to be texts (in italics) so it may be a bit weird to read (hopefully not) (sorry for these parantheses) please let me know if there’s anything off!

pairing: luke hemmings x reader

summary: having known luke for years, it was bound to happen eventually. the crush you developed happened before you could stop it, and you did your best to keep it a secret. you told no one, did your best not to show it, so what do you do when his girlfriend finds out?

warnings: swearing (as usual), 

genre: angst, fluff, basically friends (to brief enemies but not really) to lovers?

wc: 5,201 (they’re getting longer, huh)

taglist: @1sosrvd1267 + @wowitsel (side note: i don’t have a current taglist, this is just for this fic!)

part one | my masterlist!

You skipped the after-party that night. You couldn’t bear standing in the same room as Luke and Rachel, so you booked a ride and left as soon as the car pulled up.

Had you stayed for the party, you would have crumbled under the looks of pity thrown at you by those who would have heard about what happened. The knowing looks that something bad had happened between two people everyone on the crew knew were best friends would have been uncomfortable.

The ride home is uncomfortably silent, but you were thankful the driver wasn’t the talkative type. The soft jazz playing on the radio wasn’t calming but it did distract you from the pain and embarrassment you felt from the argument.

Once the car had pulled up to your place, you bid a silent farewell to the driver and slid out.

You just wanted to get inside, take a shower, shut your phone for the night, and sleep until you physically can’t get any more sleep.

You’re not too surprised Luke stood up for his girlfriend. He does love her—he’s shown that with friends and with fans. But the way he glared at you, defended her without trying to find out what exactly went down…he had never looked at you like that.

You’ve seen that look before; it wasn’t something you were used to but it was the look he would give paparazzi when they would harass you, the guys, and his friends. The glare carried such strength that it would make people back off. And so when it was directed towards you, it struck you hard.

Having done what you wanted to do once you entered the house, you lay in bed with wet eyes staring at the ceiling. Your phone was face down on your nightstand, completely out of reach to the point one slight touch could knock it off.

Maybe you were the one at fault. Maybe you should’ve told the truth about your feelings to Rachel or Luke before this all happened. It could have prevented the fallout and you would be with the guys and the crew celebrating a successful show.

But what good would that have done? Had you told someone, anyone, that you liked Luke more than a best friend should, would that have caused the same problem but presented differently? Or would something come from it? Maybe nothing would have happened.

A sigh escapes your lips as you turn your back away from the nightstand, facing the empty half of the bed and before your mind drifts to more pitiful thoughts, you close your eyes.

You didn’t dream that night. It’s as if you blinked, with the night flying by faster than you had wanted and anticipated.

The sunlight beamed down on you from above your headboard. It was late morning and it was time to face the harsh reality of the day.

There is no doubt you have lost Luke as your best friend.

Wiping the sleep and crust from your eyes, you sit up and vacantly glance around the room. The box where you keep gifts from Luke is illuminated by the sunlight, and with the vacant stare you stand to walk towards it.

You hesitate to open it; it’ll bring back memories of good times and with the events of the previous night, you do not think you can handle the rush of emotions.

It’s then when you realize your phone was off, and though you don’t want to do anything social today and would rather stay home with your favorite snacks and shows, you know you have to let your friends know how you’re doing.

You stall by washing your face and brushing your teeth, albeit slower than usual. You know that once you turn your phone on, the onslaught of questions and missed calls are going to take possibly an hour to clear up.

Sure enough, as you turn your phone on, the missed messages come in, barely giving your notification tone a break and the missed calls and voicemails were coming in fast. You can feel the heat from the battery on your palm, and for the sake of the phone you switch the sound off and turn on Do Not Disturb to prevent any new calls from coming through.

The messages you saw were from the crew, asking where you went and if you were okay. Others were from the boys minus Luke, and looking through the missed calls, there was nothing from Luke.

You’re not surprised, but the pain was still simmering within and seeing no messages or missed calls from him was adding to it.

You responded to the crew’s messages first, since many of them sent one or two messages asking simple questions: “Are you okay,” “Where did you go,” and “Did you get home safe?”

Then you responded to the boys’, Michael’s first since he had the least amount of messages.

hey, you didn’t have to leave. we could’ve talked some sense into him when he calmed down (11:37pm)

did u get home okay? we know you didn’t drive here yourself. (11:58pm)

please let us know you made it home. let us know you’re okay (12:10am)

hope you made it home and that you’re safe and okay. thank u for ur work today. please text me when you see these. goodnight (12:49am)

You typed your reply to him, letting him know that you were okay and got home safe.

Calum’s messages were similar, asking the same questions but some were repeated to emphasize his worry. In response, you answered his questions like Michael’s.

But even before you can open Ashton’s messages, seeing double digits next to your conversation with him, rapid knocks on your front door grab your attention.

With a groan you stand and grab your robe from the hook on the door, wrapping it tightly around your body as you open the door and groggily walk to the front door.

It was a stupid idea, as you weren’t ready to face anyone yet Ashton stands in front of you. He’s well-rested, a stark contrast to you as you were sure your eyes were still puffy and bloodshot, along with an occasional sniffle from your nose.

His eyes travel from your face, down to your feet, and back up to your eyes. He can immediately tell you had a terrible night.

“You weren’t answering anyone last night,” he begins, tilting his head as he narrows his eyes, “we were worried about you after you left.”

“Yeah,” you sighed, “I just—I didn’t feel like talking to anyone.”

“You could’ve let one of us know that you were shutting off.”

You nodded with a frown, “I could have, yeah,” your eyes dart around behind him to avoid his worrisome eyes before asking him if he wanted to come in.

He doesn’t hesitate and steps in once you move aside, opening the door wider to give him enough room. He notes your bag in a heap on the floor a few inches away from the couch, and how your shoes were far apart, with one upside down, as if you flung them off.

“How are you holding up now?”

You shrug, still avoiding his eyes because you know if you make eye contact, you’ll break down and you won’t have control over the onslaught of emotions.

“Be honest,” his voice is soft, wanting to make you feel comfortable enough to open up.

You stare at the ground, biting the skin of your lower lip nervously. This is why you did not want to talk to anyone face-to-face. Talking to them over the phone, preferably through text, allowed you to lie to the other person (and if applicable, to yourself). But talking to someone in person, and to someone who can see through your lies, you were bound to break down and become vulnerable.

You inhale, taking careful steps to the couch and gently sitting down with a sigh. Ashton follows you, sitting next to you but giving you space to not overwhelm you.

“What happened last night—,” you lean back with your arms folded over your chest, “—was something that I feared. When I realized I liked Luke, I was so worried about him finding out and what the outcome would be. I knew from the beginning that things would never be the same if he found out, and I was afraid of the change that would come from it.”

Ashton listens intently, his eyes displaying sincerity as he listens to you list off your worries. What he saw last night bothered him to no end, and had he not exerted most of his energy during the show, he would not have slept at all and would have stayed up all night in a constant state of worry.

“So, now that Rachel knows, and no doubt Luke has caught on, I don’t know what to do. I responded to everyone’s texts before you arrived, and Luke sent nothing—not even a phone call.”

Ashton nods, swallowing before speaking, “Well, after you left, things went down that may be the reason why he hasn’t tried contacting you.”

Your head turns to face him, eyebrows furrowed as confusion embeds itself across the rest of your features.

Ashton readjusts himself, getting comfortable in his seat as he gathers the right words.

“Something happened after I left?” You ask as you shift in your seat to face him.

“Michael wanted to go after you, to at least offer you a ride back, but Calum went back to tell Luke that it was bullshit what happened. So, Michael went back to make sure they wouldn’t fight or anything. I also pointed out that he was a dick; choosing you over her when he’s known you the longest didn’t sit right with us. But he got defensive and kept wanting to leave but Rachel convinced him it was alright, so they stayed for the party. But the party was bad—the crew felt the tension and the vibes were down—,” he chuckles at the word choice, getting a small laugh out of you as well, “—it brought everyone out of the energetic and ecstatic mood we were in before the confrontation. We all kinda did our own thing during the party but we noticed things were tense between Luke and Rachel. And when the party ended, shit hit the fan.”

“What happened?”

Ashton sighs, “To make the long story short, they got into an argument when we were leaving the venue after Michael brought up your name. He said something like, ‘I hope they got home safe,’ and that you weren’t answering your phone at all. Calum and I pointed out, again, how rude Luke was to you and Luke kept defending himself. Rachel dropped an insult and something shifted. Basically, they’re done and the guys and I can finally fucking breathe.”

“Wait—,” you stand with bulging eyes, “—wait, are you saying they broke up?”

Ashton hums as he watches you mindlessly walk around your living room.

The guys have been waiting for their break-up. It’s not something they were open about, as to avoid any conflict with their best friend, but it was almost an unspoken agreement: Rachel was not liked.

As for you, it’s not like you were wishing for their break-up. You wanted Luke to be happy, and if he was happy in that relationship, then so be it. But you were not a fan of it. Yeah, you liked her in the beginning but when she started disregarding you as if you did something to offend her, you lost most of your respect for her. Now, with this news of their break-up, you don’t know what to do.

Are you happy? You don’t exactly feel happy about it, but there is some relief.

“So,” you sit back down on the couch slowly, “what am I supposed to do with this information?”

“Not sure,” Ashton shrugs, “but I recommend talking to Luke.”

You shake your head fervently, “No. I don’t feel like talking to anyone.”

“But you’re talking to me,” Ashton has a smirk, but you know there’s no malice behind his joke.

“You showed up unannounced, Ash,” you smile, “I was responding to everyone who sent messages and voicemails. I don’t feel like talking to anyone else in person.”

He holds his hands up in defense, “Fair enough, but don’t be a stranger.”

He gives you a quick hug, whispering something similar to ‘don’t shut Luke out’ before he pulls away and walks out.

Ashton’s words stuck with you for the next week. You felt comfortable enough a few days after the fact to contact the boys, eventually meeting up with Ashton and Calum for lunch and third-wheeling Michael and his fiancée. The only person out of your friend group and co-workers you have not contacted was Luke. He hasn’t contacted you either, but you do not think much about it as you’re still trying to figure things out. If he were to contact you, how do you talk about what happened?

You want to know why he was able to choose his then-girlfriend over you, but at the same time you don’t want to know the answer. You know that one day, and though it hurts, you will not be his number one. With the way he behaved that night, it felt like that dreadful moment came to earlier than expected, that he found his number one and you immediately became his second go-to person.

So it did surprise you when you were out with an old friend to receive a text from Luke.

Can we talk about what happened? (2:23pm)

You only stare blankly at the text, not even moving to type a response. You were in such a good mood, and not even this text would change it. Instead, you lock your phone and place it back in your pocket, noting to leave it alone until your day out comes to an end.

And when it does, you see that more texts from Luke had arrived, the final being sent an hour before the outing ended.

I know you’re mad, I understand that and I don’t blame you but please talk to me (2:31pm)

You’re reading these, please say something (2:33pm)

There are some things that I need to clear up with you, I want to apologize for what happened that night but I want to do it face to face. Please respond. (3:57pm)

Whenever you’re ready, I’ll be waiting. Sorry if I’m bombarding you with these texts, I just don’t want to lose you over something that I realize now should not have happened. Respond when you want to, I’ll be here. (5:49pm)

You could only let out a small chuckle at the persistent requests to talk, and you don’t deny the small—minuscule, honestly—flutter in your stomach. You don’t waste any time responding.

Sorry, I was busy. We can meet somewhere to talk. (7:08pm)

He responds about five minutes later, agreeing to meet at a small café the two of you love tomorrow afternoon.

The rest of the night for you is spent thinking of ways to carry yourself, being completely confident, and accepting the fact that you love your best friend. Pep talks in the shower and mirror to calm any arising nerves, revising the topics you want to talk about in your head so you keep the confidence.

As for Luke, he was struggling to gather all his thoughts. In the beginning, he thoroughly enjoyed the fact that you and Rachel got along. He liked seeing his best friend and girlfriend become friends like that. He didn’t notice the shift, however, and he wishes he did before things got out of hand.

When he defended Rachel, without finding out the story from all sides, he thought he was doing what was right. To him, friendships and relationships have the same base, but romantic relationships with a partner have a different structure than friendships do, and he was starting to see cracks in his friendship before he saw it in his relationship.

When he confronted Rachel after she insulted you, he started to see someone he never saw. He remembered the times Rachel ignored you, sometimes playing it off as if she never heard you. He remembered how she would make plans with everyone and exclude you, but he always played it off as an accident (even if he knew it wasn’t). He remembered all these times he noticed a change in mood when the two of you were in the same room, and he couldn’t believe he turned a blind eye to all of it.

It hurt him to break-up with Rachel—he won’t deny that because he did love her. It’s not that he saw the rest of his life with her as they weren’t at that mark in the relationship.

But, when he did picture his future, he always saw you. He always thought it was just as a friend, someone who was just joined at the hip. Yet, he was quick to throw that away for someone he rarely saw when he pictured the future.

Which is why, the next day, as he sits at a booth near the window of the café, he carefully goes over what he wants to say. He doesn’t want to ruin the chance to fix things between the two of you. If it goes awry, not only does he lose you, but his friendships with the band and the team will take a hit since they all love you.

The bell above the door rings making his head turn to watch you walk in. Your eyes danced around the café before they fell on him.

He couldn’t help the smile the formed on his lips, a small breath of relief escaping as he watches you walk towards him. The smile doesn’t stay long though, because as you sit down with a stoic expression, the reality hits him.

“I got your usual,” he’s shy and timid, pushing the mug toward you as he eyes the liquid nearly spills the edge.

You mumble a ‘thanks,’ grabbing the mug and taking a small sip. It falls silent as the two of you wonder who should start first.

Luke makes the move first. He sighs, sitting up straight and wiping his palms on his pants.

He’s nervous. When the guys started touring, visiting new cities and countries, he would always be nervous and constantly wiped his hands on his thighs, sitting up straight and even straighter if he wasn’t slouching. It’s an old habit, but something you remember fondly as he had grown out of it. Or so you thought.

“I want to start with I’m sorry,” he begins, making eye contact but fails to hold it. His eyes instead drift to his drink, “I know what I did was wrong, and I put you in a spot that hurt you and disregarded you. At the moment, I thought I was doing the right thing because she was my girlfriend, but then—” he gulps, “when she insulted you, it struck a nerve and, not to sound cliché or anything, it felt like it opened my eyes. I saw someone I didn’t see when I first met them.”

You don’t respond, just nodding your head to let him know you’re listening.

He licks his lips before continuing, “When the guys brought up how you left on your own, I was feeling nervous and they started reminding me how much of a dick I was to you. I didn’t want to admit it myself, but now, I was such an ass. I’m just—I’m so sorry for what happened.”

“Luke,” you sigh, shifting in your seat, “I’m not saying I forgive you but I accept your apology. It hurt me so much that a friend, someone I’ve known for years was just so quick to turn their back and take someone else’s side. I know she was your girlfriend, but I wish you didn’t do what you did.”

“If I could go back and fix it, I would.”

You only nod again, trying to think about other things that need to be talked about. The one topic you hope to avoid is the possibility of him knowing your feelings—something you do not want to discuss, at least not yet.

“Did she say anything to you?”

The question leaves your mouth before you register it, and the widening of your eyes catches Luke off guard.

“What?”

“Nothing,” you mutter, grabbing your mug and taking a long sip.

“She didn’t tell me what started the problems between you two, if that’s what you mean,” Luke smiles a bit, watching you nervously play with the mug’s handle after the sip. It fades when your eyes move up to meet his, “I don’t know what happened between the two of you, but it isn’t important anymore. She’s out of the picture, and I don’t want to lose you.”

The silence returns, but unlike the previous bout, it’s a calming silence. It isn’t uncomfortable, rather the air is easier to breathe and the tension isn’t unsettling.

“Where do we go from here?” Luke asks, nervously wringing his fingers.

“I don’t want to lose you as a friend, Luke,” you offer a smile, “but it’s going to take some time to ‘heal,’ if you will.”

Luke smiles again, this time a bigger grin. He nods, leaning back in his seat, “Let me know what I can do to make things better. I’ll do it if I get to keep you.”

Over the next few months, your friendship with Luke was rekindled. The guys were at ease now that Rachel was gone and you seemingly had taken her place, even though you were friends. The awkward glances they would give when Rachel was in the same room were now playful rolls of the eyes over a dumb joke or pranks. You didn’t miss out on any outings you wanted to go to, now that everyone invited would check in with each other the night before. Things went back to the way they were before Rachel.

There was a change in your friendship, however. It wasn’t something you noticed right away, but it was something you thought about at night just a few weeks ago. Luke paid more attention to you, not that he didn’t pay attention before, but this was a noticeable change where he still looks at you even after you finished talking, and would only look away from you when you caught him. He would always cover his mouth with his index and middle finger, but you saw a small smile behind them. You played it off as friendly teasing, but it tugs on your heartstrings.

Another noticeable change is the hugs. Duration-wise, they were relatively the same. However the touch lingered; if he wrapped his arms around your shoulders, an arm would stay around your shoulder, meanwhile if they were around your waist, his hand would stay on the small of your back. You played it off as a friend being protective, but yet again, it did nothing to stop your growing love.

Tonight was the first night of their tour. The boys were up to their usual pre-show antics, as well as the nervous habits; Michael fixing his hair and deciding whether to go with a beanie or a hat, or neither, Ashton was warming up with his pre-show playlist, Calum testing his bass, and Luke was relatively fine.

Sure, he was nervous because it isn’t a crowd of 500, close to 20,000, but he was calm compared to the last time he performed. He didn’t have any worries to talk about, his vocal warm-ups were smooth, and getting dressed up was a breeze. He shared chuckles with you as you both watched the others move around with tense expressions (all with no malice, of course).

“You sure you’re not on edge?” you nudge Luke with your arm as he leans forward on the couch your sitting on to fix his shoe.

“Nope,” he sits up, leaning back in his seat.

“Really?” you inquire again, doubt laced in your tone with a hint of teasing.

“Yeah,” he chuckles, “if anything I’m excited about tonight.”

You hum, crossing your arms as you watch Ashton walk over.

“Ten minutes left,” he nods at Luke before walking to Michael to tell him the same thing.

You give Luke a look, wanting to get him to admit he is nervous, but all you get is a smirk and a shrug. He stands, patting your shoulder left before walking away to put in his in-ears.

You won’t deny you still don’t have feelings for him. Throughout the past few months, you were able to pinpoint the reasons why you fell for him. The small acts, the obscure things he would remember about you—especially the ones you don’t remember yourself—with the attention he would give you. It was staring you in the face, but you chose to deny all the signals to give yourself the satisfaction of thinking it was just a phase. But now you know why you love him.

Two minutes until showtime, Ashton finishes his speech and the crew is taking their places. The band stands at the opening, waiting for their cue to head out.

As you watched them hype themselves up, you noticed Luke looking around nervously. Of course.

“Nervous?”

His head whips toward you, and you can see it in his eyes.

“A little,” he mumbles, but you don’t hear it over the crowd’s excited screams.

“You got this,” you grab his shoulders to make him look you in the eyes, “like Ash said, you guys worked your asses off for this album. The fans loved it, your shows are all sold out, and you have thousands out there waiting to see you kill it.”

He’s silent, blue eyes staring into yours as they bounce from one eye to the other.

“I love you,” he blurts, loud enough just for you to hear.

You freeze, the grip on his shoulder loosens but remain.

He notices, “She did tell me something that night, and whether or not it’s true, I-I love you.”

“Sixty seconds!” a stage recites in the earpieces.

The boys turn to look at both of you, curious eyes turn into surprise as they watch your expression.

“I don’t know how long, I don’t know when, and I don’t know what it was, but I know for sure.”

Your eyes glance at Ashton briefly, not missing the knowing smile he gives you before you look back into Luke’s eyes.

“I…love you, too,” you respond, gripping his shoulders while your eyes drop down to his shiny shoes.

He doesn’t hear you over the cheers and screams, but reading your lips he knows the answer.

Luke smiles, grabbing the back of your head and kissing your forehead.

He leans down to your ear, “I expect to hear you say it when I come back.”

With flashing lights scattering across the stage, the boys run out to the stage, big smiles gracing their faces for multiple reasons with adrenaline pumping through their veins. From backstage, you watch the show you a smile, feeling high from the brief but fulfilling confession.

It’s two hours later when the show ends. Your heart is pounding as you watch the crew celebrate the successful first show.

Luke pulls you away from the crowd, into the hallway and away from the noise.

“So it was true, what Rachel said?” Luke begins, his hand still holding yours as a shy smile forms.

“What did she say?”

He exhales air through his nose in a laugh, “She said you were in love with me, and that you were trying to break us up.”

You scoff, shaking your head as you look at your intertwined fingers. He squeezes your hand to get your attention.

“I doubt that last part, but the first part I’m hoping is true in a sense.”

Your eyes meet his, adoration swimming in them bringing a smile to your face, “There may be a strong crush I have on you,” you tease, “and it may or may not have turned into love.”

He laughs, letting go of your hand to wrap you in a hug. His head dips down, his forehead on your shoulder as he breathes in your scent. He moves slightly, whispering in your ear, “Say it.”

Your head rested against his chest, hearing his heart beat rapidly and rhythmically.

“I love you,” you whisper.

You feel him smile against your shoulder before he pulls away, his arms resting on your hips as he smiles down at you.

“If you’d like,” he begins, his tone timid now, “that place you like in Seattle has a new dish. It’s our next stop…” he drifts off, hoping you’d catch on to him asking you out.

You do, laughing at how he remembered yet another thing you seem to have forgotten. It was a themed restaurant that had some of the best food you’ve ever eaten, and for days you wouldn’t stop talking about it. But you never went back to it, even during breaks, but somehow he seemed to remember.

“Yes, Luke.”

You know the shock will hit you later that night, that finally the person you’ve fallen for, who happens to be your best friend, admitted his feelings to you. But you’re happy, Luke’s happy, and with the boys’ and crew’s reaction to the two of you walking back to the area where they’re celebrating, the happiness is infectious.

On the road in the tour bus, Ashton passes you as you respond to emails.

“Thanks for not shutting him out,” he says, drinking a small bottle of water from the fridge.

“Did you know?”

He shrugs, avoiding your eyes as he finishes the bottle and tosses it in the recycling bag. “Maybe,” he walks towards the back where the beds are, “maybe not.”

You shake your head, “You did.”

“Didn’t want to spoil it,” he gives you a quick hug before retreating to bed.

Luke walks out of the bathroom shortly after, taking his spot next to you.

“Go to bed,” you slightly shift your shoulder as he lays his head on it, “you need the rest.”

“No,” he mumbles, sleep lacing his tone, “feels like a dream. Don’t wanna wake up.”

You chuckle at his nonsense, finishing off the last email before shutting the laptop and placing it on the counter next to you. You adjust yourself on the couch to have Luke lay down with you. He readjusts himself so he doesn’t crush you, wrapping his arm around your waist and placing his head on your chest.

“I wish I had known before all the drama,” he mumbles again, eyes closed, “I want you in my life, always.”

He drifts off to sleep with that, a faint smile on his lips.

You know what made you fall in love with your best friend. You accept it now, and you’re at peace knowing the feeling is mutual.

[lottiepoursherheartout]

if you want to know what love feels like, look at the world around you. look at all it’s broken intricacies. the cracks that seem to deepen every time the powerful trample our impoverished or prey on our most vulnerable of species. what holds everything from falling through? what could possibly be strong enough to confuse gravity and close wounds forged over millions of years? in all this pitiful desperation what prevails? that is love.

l.h.

[notchainedtotrauma]

We all need something to keep going. Here is my modest contribution.

I don’t want to make somebody else. I want to make myself.

 from Sula by Toni Morrison

Nydia Blas, from The Girls Who Spun Gold

Build cultural institutions out of dirt. In the hands of Wiccan, Hoodoo and Voodoo witches, dirt from various places can be an ingredient for spells and powerful magic because it is a conductor of sacred energy. Create medecines from dirt. Build healing institutions out of dirt. 

from A Dirty South Manifesto: Sexual Resistance and Imagination in the New South by L.H Stallings

Renée Stout, Spirit Detector

This practice of regard for one another is so important, so critical because Black women are treated with such little regard, such little regard in the world. We — the surplus life, the nobody, the thing who falls out of the scheme of representation, the void, the tool — expect to be rough-handled. What we think and imagine has been dismissed and ignored. What we want has been belittled and mocked. So when our lives aren’t handled brutally or indifferently, but treated with care, you feel the force of that.

 Saidiya Hartman in conversation with Rizvana Bradley

Carrie Mae Weems, from The Kitchen Table series

We believe that the most profound and potentially most radical politics come directly out of our own identity, as opposed to working to end somebody else’s oppression. In the case of Black women this is a particularly repugnant, dangerous, threatening, and therefore revolutionary concept because it is obvious from looking at all the political movements that have preceded us that anyone is more worthy of liberation than ourselves. We reject pedestals, queenhood, and walking ten paces behind.

from The Combahee River Collective Statement

Lorna Simpson, Untitled (a lie is not a shelter)

What does it mean to kind of…to try to experiment with living…uhm…in the context of a world that is in so many ways uninhabitable ? 

  Saidiya Hartman

Mickalene Thomas, Din Facing Forward

The most anti-capitalist protest is to care for another and to care for yourself. To take on the historically feminized and therefore invisible practice of nursing, nurturing, caring. To take seriously each other’s vulnerability and fragility and precarity, and to support it, honor it, empower it. To protect each other, to enact and practice community. A radical kinship, an interdependent sociality, a politics of care.

Because, once we are all ill and confined to the bed, sharing our stories of therapies and comforts, forming support groups, bearing witness to each other’s tales of trauma, prioritizing the care and love of our sick, pained, expensive, sensitive, fantastic bodies, and there is no one left to go to work, perhaps then, finally, capitalism will screech to its much-needed, long-overdue, and motherfucking glorious halt.

 from Sick Woman Theory by Johanna Hedva

LaToya Ruby Frazier, from The Notion of Family

We will not die.Blk music. Blk rage. Blk city of the soul in a very cold town.

 from After Avery R. Young by Jericho Brown

LaToya Ruby Frazier, from The Notion Of Family

[adrischrv]

REGNUM [L.H] - Chapter 4

Author´s Note: Here´s Chapter 4 of my king!luke fanfic, here you can check the other chapters: Intro - C1 - C2 - C3 

Word count: 1,456

A few minutes ago, Ashton and I had wandered away from the path that indicated the correct way to go through the garden; "The right thing is not always the right thing to do," he´d said. 

I began a round of rather informal questions as we continued to walk around.

“Your turn, has anyone ever conquered that heart of yours before?” He asked. 

“Not really, it's a... territory that hasn't been explored or not much.” 

That was true, I've never had a relationship with anyone before. Since I was a little girl I only had time for the duties that a princess in training has to do. I had flirted with some, yes, but I promised myself to keep those moments to myself. Besides, my mother's words always echoed in my head; "Wanting and needing are different things, to reign you don't need a man... but if someday you want him, go after him".

“What about you?” I asked. 

“No, not at the moment. I've had lovers, of course, but in the end... I return to the throne alone.”

“Explain to me, since you and Lauren are kings... what will happen when one of you gets married?”

The subject had some relevance for me: it was a mystery that was not described in the books or exposed in the classes, a singular case.

“If that happens... when that happens," he corrected himself, "then the other abdicates the throne. We made that pact when my father died.”

Covenants, promises, and favors were of high importance to everyone in the three kingdoms. Believing someone else's word was difficult, but whoever did not keep it should be prepared to lose his honor and deal with the consequences.  

We remained silent for a moment; I didn't know how to follow the talk. 

“Tell me, what did you think of the dinner?” Ashton asked, encouraging our passage. “Lauren said that the decoration was a lot, but in my opinion, it's more appropriate to use our colors.”

“The food was delicious, I didn't know such exquisite things existed.” I looked at it out of the corner of my eye. He didn't say anything, that's not why we were here. “You don't want to know that, do you? We came here for another reason.”

He blinked as if he had been taken by surprise, maybe he had. It wasn't on purpose, just an accident. 

He raised his eyebrows to indicate a bench in the middle of the garden, surrounded by flowers as we were now.

We took a seat. I didn't bother to remove my arm from his until he did.

 And he didn't. 

“I noticed that you were a bit strange with His Majesty King Luke," he said Luke´s title in a tone close to mockery. 

I couldn't tell him the things Luke had said about me, except that I believed them myself. The truth was that I felt small, an heiress from one country staying in another without an expiration date, hoping to bring them together... soon without my family, without answers, and power. 

I couldn't tell him that, not exactly. 

“You know Luke, his attitude and... his existence, in general, has overwhelmed me a bit.”

The hand that I had free approached slowly and caressed my cheek delicately as if touching the outline of a bubble. 

“Your situation is not easy. I know you are not telling me everything I think you are not telling me anything... but I understand. You are afraid.”

As accurate as he was, I didn't admit it. Although I had liked his comfort. 

“I have nothing to do here, at least not now. I don't know if I'm any good at this moment and that's... I don't like it, it's not good for me. It is frustrating.”

He nodded, understanding every word. His eyes were very close to mine. I took his hand resting on my cheek and gently pushed it away. 

He was still the King of Lauxwell. As attractive, understandable, and friendly as he was, I couldn't forget such detail. 

“I think the answer to your sorrows is closer than you think... How do you think the leaders we know came about?”

I took a breath. 

“Each one had their impulse and purpose based on their interests and of course, their environment, ideals, values, needs... their geographical location and family tree have a great influence too. Oh, and it depends a lot on the psychological state they were in when-”

He placed a finger over my lips, suddenly silencing them with a loving smile. He pushed it away when he saw me surprised. 

“Even if I could sit and listen to you quote the entire dictionary from memory, let's focus on the first part. They had a purpose, just like you, and they followed a path to achieve it. Moreover, they knew how to take control when they were given an opportunity.”

My purpose at that time was to have power. I was stuck in the shattered remains of what once seemed to be my future. 

“You are a smart woman, you will think about how to do it and if you need help I will be with you every step of the way.”

He was close, very close, his eyes looked especially beautiful in the moonlight. I allowed myself to lose a second in them, imagining what it would feel like to see them after a kiss. His eyes came down to my lips, his hand placed on my cheek as just minutes before, the caress of his thumb made me surrender to the touch. I approached, the warnings in my head went unnoticed, what was a kiss under the moon? innocent, pure, vulnerable. 

“Ahem... “

We both jumped out of the seat, taking a few steps away from the sound of a voice in the darkness. When I looked for the emissary all traces of happiness in me vanished. 

“I would have regretted the interruption, believe me, but your faces were very good... “

Luke walked forward as if to let us know that he was there and had seen it all. Or worse, listened. 

“What can we do for you, Your Majesty?”

Luke let out a raw, unfunny, cynical laugh. 

“You can't help me at all. She can, I need her for the official business. It has to do with Maredale.” He looked at me, pure malice he let me see. “Are you coming with me, Princess?”

“Right away.”

I didn't turn to see Ashton, I knew he would understand and I followed Luke down the dark path back to the castle. Once inside, he started walking so fast that I had trouble keeping up with him. 

“Will you tell me what this is all about?” I asked as we walked up the stairs. 

He shook his head. I had a buffet and we stopped outside my room.

“Well?” 

I looked forward to his words. Was he regretting keeping me here as my mother had asked?

Or maybe it was bad news, I couldn't think of anything that could go wrong in Maredale. 

“You're welcome.” He said without further ado. He turned around and started walking down the hall. 

You're welcome?

“What?” I walked over to him and stopped him in his tracks. He turned his eyes. “What happened to Maredale? What was the official business?” He smiled mischievously. “There was no official business, was there?”

He laughed out loud. The urge to hit him grew and grew inside me. I frowned and crossed my arms until he fell silent. 

“Come on, it was fun! Stop looking at me as if I've interrupted something, princess... oh, right! a kissing session with the "oh-so-hot" King of Lauxwell.”

“Shut up!” I shouted. “It's not funny. It's not funny, Luke. You used the name Maredale in vain.”

“As if you didn't do it.”

My purpose: to shut up Luke. 

My way: a slap in the face. 

My right hand struck Luke's left cheek hard enough to disrupt him. He swayed a little, I saw his red cheek and anger- rage and indignation in his blue eyes. My body shook. 

The sound of the slap echoed down the hall, drawing the attention of two servants who were passing by. One of them was Lidia who analyzed the scene in amazement. 

"I said shut your mouths, not make them bleed," she seemed to say. 

“Don't use Maredale's name in vain.” I slammed the door behind me. I smashed into the door and held my breath. I held it for a few minutes waiting for a sound, a knock on the door from him, something. 

The seriousness of what I had done fell on me. I slapped Luke. 

I had laid a hand on the King of Gardenstone.