#very tired of christian references
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*eyeing yet another "Childe is a Christ figure" theory*
The human urge to sacrifice someone to solve their problems.
(I really hope that's what turns out to be the Fontainian 'sin' or maybe the original Enkanomiya sin even.
sacrificing a divine being so that they could keep their petty lives and not solve the problems they were responsible for. pretending that nothing happened
or maybe even that's what was wrong with Teyvat's creation)
#childe#tartaglia#fontaine#killing a god to become a god seems noble in comparison#it requires at least some measure of personal responsibility#you can see I have beef with a certain religion#but also I have faith in our boy and I hope he breaks that trope too#very tired of christian references#especially when they don't have depth#and also#in the‚ ahem‚ original it was not the sacrifice that did the trick#it was the god's forgiveness#transcending the unforgivable and making it unimportant#(ok. maybe I could tolerate a christian reference like that)#(since this guy does tend to make horrible things unimportant)#(but I would still very much prefer him to be a different kind of orphic story)#(no forgiveness‚ just cosmic indifference and some new knowledge about the universe)#(you have to die to learn certain things)#(that's how it has always been)
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I'm realizing that the fact that Rudy and Noelle call Kris "Krismas" implies that Christmas is still a thing in Deltarune's universe. Like, it's not called something else or anything. So even though their religion centres on an Angel, I guess Jesus is still part of at least a religion in their world idk I'm tired
#it's 1:00 am I'm thinking about things#I mean it makes sense that the same kinda religions would exist#I just feel like there weren't many other references to christianity specifically#idk shit about religion tbh hhhhh#like I know that the holiday family's whole aesthetic is very christmassy.#ofc I know that but like#with the monster holiday in undertale being established as a seperate thing#like with the gyftrot and all that#I guess I always felt like the holiday they celebrate would be. gyftmas or something#although I guess we haven't met a gyftrot in deltarune yet so maybe that's dumb#idk idk#I'm a mess please don't call me stupid I'm just a wreck right now because tired and foggy#thank you for reading my weird 1 am ramblings
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A Deep Dive Into Disney’s Most Underperforming Princess
Princess Aurora can’t even be described as controversial. To most, she’s simply boring, too passive, and a continuation of the bland cycle of white princesses who wait around for magic or a prince to save them. Although no one hates her, they find her irritating at the worst, uninteresting at best. In the fifties, they must have thought the same thing. Sleeping Beauty was a commercial failure, and led to company wide annual loss. Sleeping Beauty had followed several other financial flops, such as Bambi and Alice in Wonderland, the latter costing Disney around half a million dollars. Due to her lack of popularity, Aurora may be one of the most neglected Princesses. Many cling to her out of nostalgia, or because she has a nice design, and they find it hard to defend their love for the movie. But the movie’s turbulent history and the amount of detail that went into Aurora herself is what really makes her so incredibly fascinating.
Starting with her design, Disney hired Marc Davis as the supervising animator for Aurora. He also animated Maleficent. The intention was for them to be realistic enough to be placed against the heavily detailed backgrounds of the movie. Davis had embraced this artistic direction, while many of the animators found it, and especially Aurora, laborious and tiring to work on. Both Maleficent and Aurora had to be refined and dynamic. Davis was Disney’s go-to animator for ‘pretty girls’, examples being Tinkerbell and Alice. His knowledge of anatomy and the human body brought both Aurora and Cinderella to life, two of Disney’s most visually iconic characters. Davis had also incorporated Art Nouveau and Art Deco into Aurora’s design, while the tapestry-like art style of the movie was chosen by Eyvind Earle, who was inspired by pre-Renaissance European art. The score and songs were based on Tchaikovsky’s ballet.
Aurora alone required more effort and attention to detail than any princess before her. It took Walt Disney and his team three years to choose a voice actress. They nearly scrapped the project until they discovered Mary Costa, but Disney himself avoided interacting with her in person early on in the project, fearing that she’d influence his vision of the movie.
Aurora was loosely based on her voice actress. Her appearance and her habits (such as gesturing when speaking and singing) were both incorporated into Aurora’s animation. She was also drawn to resemble both her live action model, the same one as Cinderella’s, Helene Stanley, and actress Audrey Hepburn. Davis took inspiration from Audrey Hepburn’s slender physique and elegant demeanour.
In the book Multiculturalism and the Mouse: Race and Sex in Disney Entertainment, author Douglas Brode referred to Aurora as “a model of modern (50’s) female glamour” and compared her to Brigitte Bardot. He also compared her gown to the work of Christian Dior.
As a character, she was described by Nerve as being “the apex of women who made no choices for themselves.” Aurora is a member of the “Golden Era” of Disney heroines, the original Princess trifecta. Her dreams are the same as those before her. But it’s possible that Aurora’s dreams of true love derived from the need for companionship outside of her three fairy godmothers.
On their website, Disney describes her as, “graceful and kind. She knows that a wonderful future awaits, if you just have the courage to dream it. Aurora enjoys using her imagination and sharing stories with her forest friends. She is also loyal in her relationships -- to her animal friends, her fairies, and her kingdom. Aurora believes in a wish and remains hopeful that she will find the adventure she is looking for.”
Walt Disney himself described Aurora as being “a very layered character/different. She’s calm, yet playful. She has a sense of humour, and she has an imagination.” We can not argue that she was considered layered through the lens of the fifties, because many critics disliked all three of the original princesses for their passive personality, or lack thereof. But from the perspective of the team working on the show, they saw much more to her.
This was the film that Walt Disney worked his hardest on, it took ten years to complete. It was also the very last Princess film he was involved in. Her ‘layers’ were very much intentional. Disney tried to do the same thing with Cinderella.
With Cinderella, they attempted to make her less passive than Snow White, and they showed this through her rebelling against her abusive stepfamily. Maurice Rapf said, "My thinking was you can't have somebody who comes in and changes everything for you. It can't be delivered for you on a platter. You've got to earn it. So in my version, the Fairy Godmother said, 'It's okay till midnight but from then on it's up to you.' I made her earn it, and what she had to do to achieve it was to rebel against her stepmother and stepsisters, to stop being a slave in her own home. So I had a scene where they're ordering her around and she throws the stuff back at them. She revolts, so they lock her up in the attic. I don't think anyone took (my idea) very seriously."
The toned down version of Cinderella, although rebellious in her own way, is still toned down. That part of her character was written out. In comparison to what she would have been, she is passive. Aurora and Cinderella are both less passive than their predecessors, but passive nonetheless. All three of them are the staple damsels in distress.
However, Mary Costa described Aurora as “very strong”, citing her urge to defy her guardians as a display of independence and an example of her strength. Aurora was raised by three women, and had never met a man in her life. Costa believed that because of this, she was ‘innately romantic’ as opposed to lonely or depressed with her sheltered life. To quote, “there was a certain part of her that maybe she didn’t realise, that was just so romantic and maybe expecting something that–she didn’t even know what.”
She believed that her being raised by three older women rather than her parents made her “a little bit older, and yet, she…had this young, outreaching spirit.” Author Douglas Brode points out that the fairies’ independent raising of Aurora mirrors “precisely that sort of women’s commune numerous feminists experimented with throughout the seventies.” Aurora living in an isolated, female-only space, with female authority, is reminiscent of the bold and liberating radical feminist movement. In her own way, as a peasant, she was independent. And that independence and autonomy was taken from her upon discovering that she was royalty and betrothed to a prince. She was leaving her home and the presumed man of her dreams behind, and not of her own free will.
Aurora had enjoyed her simple life, it had fulfilled her, even if she desired more. She had dreams of finding romantic love, which she talks about in the movie’s song ‘I Wonder’. Additionally, her close relationship with animals demonstrates her loving and kind personality. She has a whimsical imagination, and it’s scenes like the ones from Disney’s Enchanted Tales series and ‘Once Upon a Dream’, that would support Costa’s claim of her being a romantic. Where she’s changing in and out of pretty gowns with a magical wand, and giggling to herself. Or dancing happily with the forest animals, thinking about her imaginary prince. In ‘Keys to the Kingdom’, she proudly sings about wishing to make decisions with her heart.
Her independence is demonstrated on multiple occasions in Disney’s discontinued Enchanted Tales: Follow Your Dreams. Aurora graciously accepts responsibility of her kingdom while both her and Philip’s parents travel away for a business trip. All on her own, she is determined to get all of her Princess duties finished on time, the hard way. She refuses to take the easy way out, time and time again, even when she doubts herself. She works harder than even her father, who would take the easy way out by signing royal documents without reading them. Even when Meriwether gives her a magic wand to help her out, she reads and fills out every royal form diligently, and helps out all of her subjects. She manages to complete her tasks on time and throw a banquet for her family and Philip by the time they return. The lesson here is to ‘stick to it’ and to ‘persevere’. But her insistence on doing everything on her own is shown once again in A Kingdom of Kindness, where she must plan a surprise party for Philip. The three fairies attempt to help her, but she continues to tell them that she wants to do it on her own. This series was cancelled, and it is difficult to find any clips of it online. But this short-series gives us some insight into Aurora’s character.
She is assumed to be the protagonist by most, but many consider the three fairies to be the protagonists. They help move the story along, they protect Aurora, and they have distinct, in-your-face personalities. Many consider Aurora authentic, or the title character, but whether she is the protagonist or not has never been agreed upon. Her lack of role in the story has been criticized by many. But some take it as an allegory for the lack of control
The most lengthy debate surrounding Aurora has to do with how feminist her character is. She may have been an improvement from the previous princesses, but she is not regarded as a particularly feminist character.
The three original princesses, all being pale-skinned European princesses with a naive and endlessly forgiving (an unrealistic standard), sends a message to their viewers that this is what princesses should look like, how they should behave. All three classic princesses are deeply intertwined with Disney’s long history of racism and bigotry. In an attempt to amend this, Disney has released back to back live action remakes of their movies, all receiving mixed reviews. Maleficent was Sleeping Beauty’s remake, focused on a maternal relationship between Maleficent and Aurora. Many people interpreted the scene where Maleficent’s wings get cut off in her sleep as sexual assault. This inclusion made many survivors of sexual assault feel represented by the character.
From my perspective, the original Sleeping Beauty is technically a movie centred around women. A teenage girl lives with her three surrogate mothers, who end up saving her in the end from the female antagonist. Although Prince Philip’s role in the story is still a large part of what moves the plot along. It is Philip who is captured, as Maleficent knew that he would go looking for her. He courted Aurora, defeated Maleficent with the help of the three fairies, and kissed the princess awake. But he still doesn’t get as large of a role, or nearly as much screen time, as the three fairies.
In short, both the movie and the princess fascinate me. And although there is depth if you squint, a character does not need to be fleshed out to be lovable, or at least endearing. Aurora is my favourite Disney Princess, and I find the history behind her and the film to be more interesting than what meets the eye.
#disney#princess aurora#my girl!!!#sleeping beauty#show white#classic princesses#cinderella#walt disney#analysis#disney analysis#essay#feminism#mina loves disney
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Cult!141 x Fem!Reader
(The night gown described in the story)
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT MDNI
⚠️Warnings⚠️: Dark Content, Manipulation, allusions to past abuse very brief not in depth, female reader, swearing, pregnancy, birth, poly relationships, smut, Cult AU, the use of lord in terms to worship, Price being referred to as Father
If you or a loved one is experiencing abuse, know that there is help, and please help anyone that you know to help them escape from that abuse.
⭐️Author's Note: The religion that the villagers follow is not defined, but it is NOT associated with Christianity, Judaism, Islam, or any other type of religion there is⭐️
Chapter 3: First Night At The Village
"Oh, I put $100 in the offering bowl." Johnny and Kyle looked at each other, "wow bonnie lass that's a big offering I'm sure the lord will bless you abundantly and will make all your prayers come true, you just have to continue to be a devoted follower." Johnny stated with surprise. John came back with two bags in his hand, "Kyle, I need a room for y/n to stay in until she gets a place of her own and make this room luxurious." Kyle looked at John, "of course I'll give her the best room there is, which is a private room with a private bath with a grand queen size bed." Shocked about hearing this y/n quickly stated, "I can't simply afford that I gave all my money in the offering bowl." "Non sense your stay is on the house for a very devoted follower we have no problem helping you out." Kyle winked. Surprised y/n is very grateful, "Thank you so much for your generosity, I'm feeling quite tired, and I would like to retire for the night."
Price takes y/n and leads her out of the tavern to take her to the inn that she was staying in. "Thank you, boys, for helping her out. I'm sure our Lord would give you many blessings. Good night." Price and y/n were walking in a comfortable silence."Father Price, do I need to go to the church for my nighttime prayers?" Price loving how devoted y/n is, "no, my child, you do not, but since I'm with you, we can do a nighttime prayers together." Y/n looked at Price and smiled, "thank you so much, Father Price, I don't know how I'll ever repay you." Price looked at y/n with a glimmer in his eyes, "you being devoted to our lord is enough for me. Oh, look, we are here. Let me walk you to your room." they check in, and Price walks y/n to her room.
"Here these are for you, its clothes for you to wear at night time and during the day." Price says, handing y/n the two bags. Y/n takes the bags, "Thank you so much, I would also like to take a shower before I make my nighttime prayers." Y/n looked at Father Price. "Of course, that is perfectly fine by me." Price said. They reached the door of her room, and Price opened the door for her. When they enter, y/n is in awe, "it's beautiful." the bed is pushed against the center of the wall and on both sides were two night stands and, a small vanity desk and chair was in the far right corner of the room and right above the desk was a windo with curtains. Y/n placed the bag on the chair and looked at the contents of the bag to find the night gown. The bad she first looked in had a dress that had a satin like feel and knew that it was for nighttime.
"I'm off to take my shower, Father Price, I'll try not to be long." Y/n walks toward her bathroom, "alright, my child, I'll wait for you out here." Price stated while moving over to the vanity to sit down on the chair. Price moved the bag from the chair to the vanity so he could sit and wait for y/n. Meanwhile, in the bathroom, you were taking a nice warm shower. 'I should have asked kyle for another herbal tea before I go to bed tonight.' y/n thought herself. She got out of the shower and dried herself up and changed into her night gown, it was a soft baby blue and the top part was a cream color coverd in lace and there was a matching sleeveless robe to go with it.
Y/n stepped out of the bathroom, "Sorry for the wait, Father Price, I would like to do my nighttime prayers before I fall asleep." Price looked at y/n in awe, "Non sense dont apologize for wanting to be clean when you want to make prayers for our lord. Come my child, let me hold your hands like we did in the church so we can do your nighttime prayers so you can have a restful night." Price holding out his hands to y/n. Y/n gives Father Price her hands, and Price started with the prayers. After the prayers, Father Price bid y/n a good night taking everything there is to not kiss her on the forehead. "Good night, Father Price. Thank you for doing the nighttime prayer with me." Y/n said, getting ready for bed, "You're welcome, my child. Now, may our Lord give you wonderful dreams." Price said, leaving the room. When Price left y/n locked her door, got in her bed and said, "My first night here in this village was not that bad." Y/n said before drifting off to sleep.
Back at the tavern with only Johnny, Kyle, and Price left, they were talking about y/n. "She's a pretty bonnie lass." Johnny said while drying some glass wear. "So innocent and naive, very gullible." Kyle stated while putting away the glass wear. "She is all of those but she will be our wife soon, we have to take it slow dont rush things, we each have to charm her separately, I'll fill Simon in with the details when he comes back from his hunting trip tomorrow morning, knowing y/n, she would want to make morning prayers so I'll go see Simon at his shop after I make morning prayers with her." John states while taking a sip of his burbon.
Taglist is open comment if you would like to be added
@yourloverslost @tabbslouuformer @angelrissa @freefallingup13 @readingcatinacorner @sylvanasthebansheequeen @casualunknownrunaway @thatpersonnamedrook @rip-cod-brainrot @hoodiepandaninja16
I hope you enjoyed it💖
#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#simon ghost x reader#john price x you#john price x reader#john price x y/n#price x reader#kyle garrick x y/n#kyle gaz garrick x reader#kyle garrick x reader#kyle gaz x reader#johnny soap mctavish x reader#johnny mactavish x reader#johnny soap mctavish x you#soap x y/n#cult!141#poly!141#simon riley x you#soap x reader#kyle gaz x you#john price x female reader
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ok listen obviously like everyone else i am Fucking Devastated but the fucking sHRIMPLICATIONS here are KILLING me.
the two last "new" songs we got before the hiatus were alpha dog and from now on we are enemies (equally fucked up song btw) and pete namedrops alpha dog as the last song they wrote before the hiatus and it's such a. it's SUCH a fucking. augh.
like it's so painfully and clearly a farewell. the lyrics all telegraph it. your time has passed. never means forever. walk off into the sunset. the discussion of how much effort is required to maintain this life and how they already feel burned out, past their prime when they were all in their mid-twenties and early thirties. and the sheer fucking POETRY of the way it was the last song they recorded - tell rock and roll i'm alone again - until they announced their triumphant return with save rock and roll in 2013. welcome to the new déjà vu.
and oh yeah the last word issued in the song's studio version is the word "abracadabra," which pete cites as the word that christian bales character in the film “the prestige” says he will utter before he disappears from prison. "abracadabra" was a key word in the viral ARG-esque marketing campaign leading up to the release of believers never die...right before fall out boy seemingly vanished off the very face of the earth.
and, OH YEAH, the first shows they played after reuniting involved a multi-song medley spanning all the stages of their career, with one of those songs being the first time they ever played alpha dog, albeit partially.
the notion of the wizard through the curtain speaking to a sense of bitterness (at least if pete's ten year old genius annotation is anything to go by) which is the exact same phrasing to the way joe would later talk about the band's fraught, strained feelings leading up to the hiatus in a podcast with kerrang while promoting his book.
many people have pointed out the parallels between flu game and alpha dog - the way they both discuss the exhaustion of being so visible and constantly putting yourself out there and how taxing that is, especially when you're simultaneously trying to cover up how hard it is. how isolating it is, when the whole world is squinting against the starlight feathering off you. it's worth noting that these parallels are not merely implicit, either. "flu game" is in and of itself an explicit reference to a famous game michael jordan played while sick in which he claimed that he didn't want to give up, no matter how sick and tired he was. and how did pete annotate a specific couplet, ten years ago?
we must make it hard to look so easy doing something so hard
another explicit reference to michael jordan, years and years prior.
and this is the first time they've ever played alpha dog in full. nearly 15 full years after the hiatus started. by now, fall out boy have been together for far longer than they've ever been apart. by now, fall out boy has been in their "posthiatus" era for longer than they have their "prehiatus" one.
i dont really have a conclusion to this. just, i dunno man. something about the repeated lyric "never means forever" on a greatest hits compilation titled "believers never die." something about i'm a star vs. so much for stardust vs. no more stardust. something about motifs that span decades, that span years of hurt and cracked-open wounds that have now been poured over with liquid gold, mending them anew. something about reclaiming old scars and ugly histories and reforging them into something filled with streaming starlight and sun-drenched smiles.
abracadabra.
#*making poasts#id in the alt text#im pure fucking wrecked about this in case you couldnt tell. im also tired as hell#this might not be articulate to anyone else but im feeling a certain type of way abt it#fucked up for them to debut this one in full when i tumblr user omeglomania was not even there. fucked UP.
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So if you believe every biblical word is 100% the word of your god, not to be questioned, only obeyed, regardless of how far humanity develops, how do you manage Ephesians 6:5-9?
Should human trafficking victims simply obey their captors “with a sincere heart” given that they are “servants of Christ” and the Bible urges bond servants to be “faithful and obedient?”
Hell, it promises obedient slaves will be rewarded in Heaven.
To anyone reading, seriously, check the whole verse, the context doesn’t make it better.
If your argument is that all in the Bible is above question, how do you account for that?
Nobody said "not to he questioned, only to he obeyed"—if what you MEAN by "not to be questioned," is "not to be carefully examined in order to get it right." The Bible straight-up says to carefully examine God's words. So don't be disingenuous.
Every Biblical word is 100% the Word of God, yeah. Ephesians 6:1-9 says:
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise), so that it may be well with you, and that you may live long in the land. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Slaves, be obedient to those who are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in the integrity of your heart, as to Christ; not by way of eyeservice, as men-pleasers, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart, serving with good will as to the Lord, and not to men, knowing that whatever good thing each one does, this he will receive back from the Lord, whether slave or free. And masters, do the same things to them, giving up threatening, knowing that both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no partiality with Him."
The chapter is talking about Christian-human relationships with other humans. Starts with the most basic human institution—family. Moves on to slaves and masters. Slaves, indentured servants, bond slaves, were all common in the time of the Bible being written. It was not cultural taboo to have people living with and working for you, or even being bought and sold by you—what the Bible is saying here is actually very counter-cultural. Because it means you have to keep treating them as equal humans, not objects or beasts of burden you can beat or mistreat however you want. Which is a low bar in our minds, but was an incredibly high bar back then. It's called "interpretation." You can't just take words written in a specific context and time period, for a specific intent, with a thousands-of-years-older vocabulary and culture, and go "oh, well in my time period and my language that word means this." It's about as dumb as saying the Wizard of Oz is about queer sex purely because of how many times the word "queer" is printed in the book.
Human trafficking victims are not the kind of "slaves" this verse is talking about, and I bet you know it.
In fact, there is too much anti-human-trafficking philosophy in the Bible for even the most ardent atheist to try the same little "discredit the Bible" smear tactic you're trying right now. Anyone who knows anything about history (beyond a mere 185 years ago, that is) and can see concepts beyond the far-West-ideology of "slavery bad" can have a more intelligent discussion than this.
I'm tired of the same old tripe.
Don't you see that God is using the same term, "slaves" to refer to Christians, HIS people, who are also called His "sheep, children, beloved, inheritors, heirs?" In this same verse? So then when the God who invented humanity uses the word "slave" can't you infer that maybe He doesn't mean it with the same baby-level-100 1/2-year-old connotations that you do? If He's using it to refer to the very same people He loves, protects, sacrificed His life for, and goes to unimaginable lengths to bless--then do you really think this verse is talking about people who are categorically worth being treated as less than human?
That doesn't make sense. You can see that it doesn't make sense.
Bottom line: if God said slavery was morally acceptable, guess what? It would be morally acceptable. He invented reality, your brain, and morality. But He didn't say that, so grow up and be serious. Instead, what He said was listed above: no matter your circumstances, be it as a child, father, slave, or master, remember and conduct yourself as if you're all slaves of God, and you're living to please Him, not each other or yourselves.
God condemns "man-stealing" in Exodus 21:16. Deuteronomy 22 condemns rape. The same God wrote 100% of the Bible through several different authors across centuries by the inspiration of the very words with His Spirit. No, this passage of Ephesians does not tell sexually trafficked victims to obey their kidnappers and rapists. And you know it. Got anything else?
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AO3 reading year in review 📚
Tagged by @teafig! Here’s a fraction of the fics I enjoyed this year! 💖
JANUARY: Of Wishes and Feathers by @trishacollins {Miraculous 🦚}
Little Felix spends an afternoon being entertained by his aunt.
Trisha wrote this for me because I am the most spoiled girl in the world! 💜 We need more Felix and Emilie in the world urgently. Someone make it your 2025 resolution. I demand it
FEBRUARY: my wings and my eyes by @bittersweetresilience {Honkai: Star Rail 🚂}
Jing Yuan is tired, but he has been tired for a long time now.
Sunny gets February for no reason other than it is Official Shipping Month and its prose single-handedly got me into Renjing. This fic in particular is so loving and tender… 🥺 There is nothing Sunny cannot write and these two idiots have helped prove it time and time again!
MARCH: I miss you more than anything by @sillyangstfic {Miraculous 🦚}
Felix reaches out to Adrien a few months after his mother's death to see if he would like to come visit. Adrien thinks that this is a great idea! Gabriel, not so much.
This was not yet published in March but WHO CARES THE VIBES FIT. Felix cares so much and the Adrien/Dandelion angst is, as the youth say, fire 🔥
APRIL: thirteen by @anna-scribbles {Miraculous 🦚}
The house was never something that belonged to him, and it still isn’t, no matter how many documents boast his name in bold print. Adrien has always belonged to it, though, like a dog tethered to a chain, like a ghost to its unfinished business.
//
The end of the world began on the day Adrien Agreste turned thirteen years old.
What can I say about thirteen that hasn’t already been said? I picked it for April because reasons, but it’s been a highlight of my entire winter and spring. The Adrien Fic Ever 🌼
MAY: love thorns all over this rose by @thevioletthread {Miraculous 🦚}
there's a boy knocking on her window. she lets him in.
[Doodles a tiny heart on your window]
[Kisses you in front of the sunrise]
[Gets down on one knee]
Alexandria, will you raise a hamster with me? 💜🦚❤️🐉
JUNE: Of Broken Bones and Promises by @bright-thehawksflight {Cyrano de Bergerac 🪶}
Christian had a leg amputated, and the two loves of his life manage to simultaneously save his life, plan for the tough times to come, and pine all over the Arras battlefield.
Lisa is the reference when it comes to Cyrano and Greek mythology fanfics. I think about the amputation-hug scene three times per week 🥺
JULY: Candle In The Wind by @phieillydinyia {Miraculous 🦚}
Someone was screaming. A horrific, guttural sound that infected the entire night with sorrow. He wondered if it was the ghosts of the people he'd just killed. He wondered if they'd come back to haunt him, to follow his every waking move, to never let him forget the way he'd demolished them into dust.c
The sound pounded through his head, threatening to burst open his eardrums, determined to push him to a breaking point. Collapsing to his knees, Chat Noir had to pause to draw in a deep breath.
It was only then that he realized the person screaming was him.
The highlight of my summer! A role reversal AU of the movie that includes the songs. How cool is that. (The answer is very cool. Mwah 💖)
AUGUST: If I hold you too close by @bbutterflies {Miraculous 🦚}
Paris didn’t come to a screeching halt for akumas anymore. They were so commonplace, so frequent, no one stopped their lives unless they were in danger. They trusted the heroes to fix everything if something did go wrong, save them if they got hurt. Adrien was still fighting the urge to find Plagg and go running into battle.
Plagg wasn’t here, though.
ADRINO ANGST MGRRRGRRRRR
SEPTEMBER: Luminous strike by @faiirygrahamdevanily {Miraculous 🦚}
Orders controlled the younger twin
Like a bird with a clipped wing
Silver metal out of his hand
The peacock at the monster's command
MY BIRTHDAY GIFT!!!! THAT CAME WITH ITS OWN MOODBOARD!!!! HELL YEAH!!!! 🎂💜🎉
Everyone should check Clara’s works out!!! The Sentikids are great for exploring themes of otherness and rarer forms of fanworks, and she does it extremely well! ❤️💜💚
OCTOBER: the monster who loves you by @purplecatghostposts {Miraculous 🦚}
Mum nods, clapping her hands together. “Your brother is finally feeling better and is coming home today! Isn’t that so exciting?”
Félix pauses mid-bite, processing her words. Mum waits expectantly, as if expecting him to jump for joy, or his equivalent of it.
But… Félix doesn’t have a brother.
(Or Félix’s brother is a monster, but only in the most literal sense. Félix’s father is a monster despite being very, very human. He learns to navigate the world through these two truths.)
SOAP SOAP SOAP SOAP I am eating you. I am eating you forever. You spontaneously appeared in the tags one day and literally haven’t stopped blessing us since but THIS FIC IN PARTICULAR. OH GOSH. OH WOW. THIS ONE IS MY ROMAN EMPIRE. You know how much I love Adrien being cast as the monster (rawr rawr rawr 🦖)
NOVEMBER: Emmy Altava and the Situationship from Hell by @drowsybadger {Professor Layton 🎩}
Or: Clive, Janice and Their Mutual Ex. Or: Emmy Altava and the Great Year that started off really, really, awful. Or: How To Overcome Your Past Mistakes
Basically, 22K words of people fixing their past mistakes and being lovingly awful to each other. Also, Clive is single-handedly responsible for London rent prices actually being affordable for the next half-century in this universe.
Drowsy infected me with the Clivejan QPR bug… My life has never been the same since…
DECEMBER: Me and You, We're Roses of Blue by @adastra-rising {Miraculous 🦚}
For centuries, the blue rose has represented mystery, royalty, and that which is unobtainable.
Why?
Because the blue rose is artificial. Unnatural. So close to being real, but not quite. The unfortunate, disappointing result of humanity daring to challenge the natural order.
And for some reason, Felix Graham De Vanily can't stop thinking about it.
Meanwhile Kagami Tsurugi, despite everything, thinks they are wonderful.
And Adrien Agreste, who prefers his roses red, is just here for a good time.
(A story in which Felix reflects on his childhood, his relationships, and the nature of what's artificial and what's real.)
(Alternatively, a story where the ideal date is destroying a dead man's property in the name of art, and two cousins who are actually brothers' bond over one truly terrible joke.)
Because excellent characterisation and flower imagery are always a gift! 🌹
SPECIAL MENTIONS
Aka works that didn’t quite fit but that I really wanted to feature:
Icarus by @dragongutsixofficial {Dumas Cinematic Universe ⚔️}
The year is 1630. The Cardinal of Richelieu won. Mme de Fargis is banned and has to leave the Court.
She has a few people to say her goodbyes to.
DRAGON STARTED WRITING AGAIN THIS YEAR AND I COULDN’T BE PROUDER. They have a real talent for emulating Dumas’ style while making the story uniquely theirs! 💖
time marches back by @asukiess {Miraculous 🦚}
The Loveybug AU was one of the highlights of 2023-2024, and this fic? This fic. It’s great, man. Definitely won’t break your heart or anything.
Everything in The Félix Zine! I have a particularly soft spot for @mostmagical’s Bridges and @nemaliwrites’ A Graphite Heart, but everyone slayed so incredibly hard! Please also contemplate our amazing artists’ pieces! 💜🦚
@beezonia’s Miraculous Mons AU. Bee, you know it, I’m the target audience for this universe. I love your ficlets, your team line-ups, your designs, everything! 💙🩵🧡
cringe origional works collection by @isdisorigionalenoughforyou
The kind of poetry that will haunt you. Discovered by accident after reading their Aroace Analysis of Jayvik, which you should also check out! 🦋
And my beloved AO3 collections (recs + my own works):
Felix | Adrien | Kagami | Senticousins | Feligami | Clive | Literature and mythology
Tagging… anyone who wants to do this, because I forgot who was and wasn’t tagged by my fellow writer friends. Go wild.
Happy 2025, everyone! May it be kind and filled with excellent stories for us to share! 💚💜❤️
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Halbrand as a pseudo-Jesus figure & Annatar as a pseudo-Christ
There's something eerily compelling about what the Rings of Power has done with these two guises of Sauron and how he's able to inspire trust, faith, and devotion in Galadriel and Celebrimbor. In the show, Sauron believes himself to be the one who needs to save or redeem Middle-Earth. The effectiveness in his manipulation of these characters involuntarily reminds me of the exploitative and manipulative nature of Evangelical Christianity and how powerfully it markets itself as the one way to solve people's deepest existential problems. So I thought about some parallels between Sauron's two main guises or personas in the show, and how Jesus and/or Christ is popularly depicted or understood (especially in Evangelical spaces). To me this helps illustrate why RoP!Sauron's deception is so effective, while exposing some unsettling issues I have with Evangelicalism.
Halbrand as a pseudo-Jesus
Halbrand was presented to Galadriel (as well as us the audience) as a scruffy, humble, ordinary man. Although more glamorous depictions of Jesus were common in Catholic art, the recent Evangelical trend has been to portray a humanized down-to-Earth Jesus (e.g., in The Chosen series, Jesus sweats, cries, gets hungry and tired and frustrated). Scripture allegedly described Jesus as humble and unexceptional in appearance and growing up through adversity and suffering (Isaiah 53). Halbrand is (ostensibly) a smith's aide, Jesus was a carpenter - both trades involving working and crafting with one's hands. It's then "revealed" that Halbrand comes from a lost royal lineage and Galadriel hails him as the King who can save his people from enslavement to an evil overlord - Jesus came from the line of the legendary King David and was hailed as King of Jews, expected to rescue his people from the Roman Empire's oppression.
Halbrand's surface-level resemblance to Aragorn, heir to the throne of Gondor, can't be ignored either (this is partly why I found the character of Halbrand so insufferable in s1, he seemed like an Aragorn knockoff to me!). It's also been argued that Aragorn is a Jesus-like figure, though he turns out to be one of the most legendary fantasy heroes rather than one of the most notorious supervillains (Sauron).
Galadriel grows to trust Halbrand and view him as her friend and possibly the only person who truly understands her. Celebrimbor also develops a close friendship with Halbrand as they work together. Evangelicalism emphasizes a "personal relationship" with Jesus as your very own friend (some even lean towards a lover) who knows everything about you and helps you with your problems and gets you what you want. Jesus' disciples were also close personal friends with him while possessing little understanding of his true divine nature.
Annatar as a pseudo-Christ
Now this is where things get a lot more interesting. In 2x02, Halbrand reveals his "true nature" to Celebrimbor in an awe-inspiring display. This goosebumps-inducing moment is akin to a religious experience for Celebrimbor, who instinctively bows in reverence to this angelic figure. Christ has also been depicted and described as arriving with the clouds (Revelation 1:7), and I'm sure the religious symbolism of this scene was not lost on many viewers. Even though Annatar seems to be a powerful emissary of the divine, he still tells Celebrimbor that they are to be equal partners in their work to save Middle-Earth. An important tenet of Christianity is that Christ desires to partner with humanity to accomplish His works. This all sounds well and good to Celebrimbor, but Sauron's ultimate mode of "saving" Middle-Earth is to enslave all its peoples and creatures to his will.
Annatar is known in Tolkien's lore as the Lord of Gifts (in the episode he describes himself to Celebrimbor as "a sharer of gifts"). His gift is the knowledge of the way of Middle-Earth's salvation. Evangelical devotionals and sermons frequently refer to salvation of the soul as a "free gift" Christ offers to humanity. (I can go on about how this phrase is a redundant tautology - oops, there's another one - but that's a whole other discussion.) I will suffice to say that the term "free gift" reads like a salesperson's marketing pitch and it bothers me. Evangelicalism as a whole feels like a colonial mission converted into a giant media marketing operation - its glossy veneer of concert-like megachurch services, prepacked apologetics, and friendly approachability often conceal sinister things (exploitation, corruption, discrimination, abuse, the list goes on).
Sauron chose to prey on two vulnerable people with potential for influence - Galadriel and Celebrimbor, both feeling isolated and slighted by their people and striving for a deeply personal and important goal that feels just out of their reach. However, he didn't force himself on them. They chose to let him in, and as a result he took advantage of their trust. In Christianity, God is described as someone Who stands at the door and knocks, and for those who choose to open the door to Him, He will come in and share a meal with them as friends (Revelation 3:20). This is more or less exactly what Celebrimbor did in 2x02 when he allowed Halbrand in, gave him food and wine, and called him his friend. This was the most eerie parallel to me, inspired by some great analyses I've read about how Sauron is depicted in the show thus far.
In season 1 Sauron as Halbrand laid his strategy bare to Galadriel - give your opponent the means of mastering their greatest fear, so you can master them. I can't help but feel that this is what organized religion does - providing the sense of assurance, safety, and emotional comfort that people desperately need, in exchange for gaining control over their life choices and even their thought patterns through rules, dogma, and pressures of social conformity. Shaping minds and bending wills sounds pretty Sauron-like to me. [Disclaimer: This is not meant to be a dunk on religion as a whole, just a reflection as I work through unlearning and critically inspecting beliefs I grew up with.]
#rop meta#trop meta#analysis#rings of power#sauron#annatar#halbrand#cw christianity#evangelicals#sorry yall this is really random#religious trauma#celebrimbor#galadriel#parallels#religious themes
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Betting on a Losing Dog
Masterlist
Read on Ao3
Chapter 1: A Ghost from the Past
Pairing: Logan/fem!Reader
Hey friends! <3 I've been working on this for a while now and even though it's not quite finished yet , I would like to share the first chapter with you! Comments and likes are highly appreciated! Hope you like it!
Summary: Logan is confronted with a ghost from his past, a ghost that haunts him to this very day.
Or
The story of Logan and F/N after the Westchester Incident, follows the plot of Logan.
Chapter 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7
Tags:
#drug abuse #swearing #angst #anger issues #main character death (it’s Logan sorry babes) #smut #alcohol abuse #fluff #drug addiction #graphic description of violence #heavy angst #biting #thigh riding #oral (f receiving) #p in v sex #unprotected sex (wrap it up) #kissing #skin picking #graphic description of injuries #attempt at humor #spending time as a family #intrusive thoughts #fighting #hurt no comfort (maybe a little comfort) #found family #marriage!?!! #self harm (skin picking) #throwing up #self destructive behavior and tendencies #depression #smoking #references to Christianity and religion #video game references #road trip
Playlist:
F/N- first name
L/N- last name
E/C- eye color
H/C- hair color
S/C- skin color
F/C- favorite color
Mutation: Fear manipulation - trapping people in their nightmares, showing them their deepest darkest fears as well as possession and energy draining through touch.
A Ghost from the Past
A bell rang. The pungent smell of cheap plastic and cleaning products filled the air as Logan stepped into the small supermarket. The lady on the radio was babbling about the incident at the casino a day prior, to his relief it was promptly shut off, switched to some pop music.
Flickering neon lights burned in his tired, bloodshot eyes, a stark contrast to the darkness outside. He glanced at Laura who seemed unimpressed, albeit a little grumpy. The cramped shelves were filled with everything one could want, from groceries to household goods to dog fashion. Whoever was supposed to buy that here.
Logan paused, his brows pulled into a frown. There was something familiar between the biting smells, a fragrance he hadn't smelled in years.
He shook his head, trying to rid his mind of the resurfacing memories, it was probably nothing. Or maybe, just maybe he was finally losing his mind.
From the corner of his eyes, he could see the backroom of the small shop, the door slightly open. He could make out the silhouette of who he assumed was the cashier, throwing something into her mouth that was definitely not Tictacs, before disappearing from his view.
The faster they got out of here, the better, this place was a shithole and they had no time to spare. “Laura. We're here for food. Nothing else. Chuck is waiting for us in the car.”, his voice was stern and left no room for arguments, but he knew that if the girl really wanted something, she would take it or throw a tantrum trying. That was the last thing he needed right now.
Laura disappeared between the shelves and Logan hoped that she wouldn't get them in trouble this time. They did not need any more complications at the moment.
“That's it. I've told you a million times to not pop pills while you're working.” That must be the shopkeeper, his angry voice came from somewhere within the backroom. “I’m sorry sir it won't happen again” Logan froze, that voice…it reminded him of someone. Of her. But it couldn't be. He must be hearing things now too. “No, I’ve given you plenty of second chances. Finish your shift and don't come back tomorrow.” The poor cashier was probably just trying to get through the day, but Logan had no time for compassion right now. They had to get out of here as quickly as possible.
Logan shook his head, grabbing two sandwiches, a large bottle of Jack Daniel’s that would last him a couple of days as well as some fruit juice for Laura. Apple or something.
Finally said girl emerged from behind one of the stuffed shelves “Did you get something to eat?” Laura held up a bag of potato chips and a coke, Logan frowned, he didn't even have the energy to shake his head: “No. Absolutely not, that does not count as a meal” He groaned, rubbing his face in annoyance. “Get something different.” Laura glared up at him, marching back to find something else, hopefully something with a little more nutritional value than a bag of fatty potato chips (He's trying to be a good paternal figure or whatever).
He began to put their stuff on the slightly dirty counter, ringing the little bell to inform the cashier (or should he say ex-cashier) that he wanted to pay. “One second” there was that voice again, maybe his ears were giving up on him or maybe, just maybe the alcohol was finally going to his head.
Logan was counting his money, hoping it would be enough. The cashier appeared in his peripheral vision, hammering something into the checkout, before beginning to scan his stuff. Each beep made Logan flinch internally, this wasn't helping the hangover he was currently nursing at all.
“Laura will you hurry-” he barked, as he finally looked up at the cashier. when he saw her face, he froze, his voice betraying him.
Was he seeing ghosts now? And of all the people he had lost…her? Shit. This couldn't be. He must have drunk too much. This had to be an alcohol induced hallucination. Surely.
He blinked a couple of times. And still. There she was. His F/N. His Ghost.
“We call her Ghost” Logan’s lips formed a frown, he shifted on the leather couch taking a big swig from his beer: “Why? Is she a little scary or something?” Kurt shook his head, his dark blue lips pulled downwards: “Nein- I mean ja but… she's more than a little scary she’s super-duper scary” Logan huffed, his patience wearing thin tonight as he took another gulp of his cold beverage.
"Well spill it, elf. What's so scary about her?” he grunted, flexing his free hand. Kurt shifted uncomfortably in his seat, the blue mutant was a little tipsy: “She can manipulate fear and possess people… drain some of their life force as well…she can trap people in their worst nightmares until they lose their minds” Logan's eyes widened the tiniest bit, he was silent for a moment, contemplating his reply. He didn't know this ‘Ghost’ and yet he felt bad for her: “That…sounds hella depressing.” he finally mumbled. Kurt nodded, tail raising his own beer to his mouth to take a sip: “That's why she rarely uses it. Just enough to be able to control it…”
She hadn't changed all that much, her mutation slowed down her aging if she consumed the energy of others and yet she looked a little older. But if she looked older, then he looked like a damn fossil. (A damn sexy fossil grrrr)
Her hair was longer than he remembered, but still a beautiful H/C. Framing her face so nicely. Her E/C eyes were more tired, but she looked just as beautiful as on the day when-
“Fuck. Logan?” She was the first to speak, her E/C eyes wide, pupils dilated and filled with surprise and recognition. His thoughts went back to when he'd seen her popping those pills in the back. She never changed and it hurt. “Hey”, his voice was more breathless than he'd liked, rougher and tired. They both were silent for a moment, the gentle humming of the neon lights filled the tense air. The memory of their last meeting flickered into his mind, when they’d last seen each other.
“Logan- I- We- I can't do this anymore”, F/N was trying to stay calm, a desperate edge to her voice as she paced through the dimly lit kitchen of the X mansion, frustration written all over her face. Logan looked up from his beer in irritation: “Do what?” he asked gruffly. F/N stopped right in front of him, her expression serious, brows pulled into a frown as if she couldn't believe that he even had to ask: “Pretend like everything's okay…”
Logan scoffed, taking a long drink from his beer, before setting it down on the table with an unnecessary loud clunk: “I have no idea what you’re talking about, sweetheart. Are you high again?” He regretted the words as soon as they had left his mouth, he knew he had overstepped, but there was no going back now.
Well, there was but he was too much of a coward to apologize.
F/N seemed a little taken aback, but she caught herself: “Logan don't give me that.” Her frustration grew but her voice stayed steady: “Something’s wrong with Charles and you know it. Something has to be done.”
Another sip of beer, Logan scoffed: “You're being delusional.” He should stop drinking, he knew it. He should apologize to her right fucking now. But he didn't have it in himself. It would mean that he had to admit that Charles was unwell. They would have to address the problem that had been building up for months.
A look of hurt crossed her face, he hated seeing her like this: “Logan I'm fucking serious.” She groaned, running her hand over her face, it was obvious that this was going nowhere: “I'm going out. I'll be back late.” Logan nodded, his expression stern and his voice rough, but F/N recognized the soft edge that was only reserved for her: “I’ll leave the light on.”
Even when they were fighting, he couldn't help but worry about her.
“Bye, Logan. Love you.”
She had said it so softly, so carefully but he could feel that she was genuine. He had wanted to return the words. But he was a stubborn asshole. And a Coward.
He watched her go in silence, not saying another word.
They had fought. He knew he should have listened to her back then. Not drown his trouble in alcohol.
And the worst part was that he hadn’t even said goodbye.
He hadn't told her that he loved her.
Logan was about to speak when Laura wordlessly (as always) slapped a sandwich and a bag of radioactive-looking blue candy on the counter. Poor F/N seemed even more confused now, her eyes flickering between him and the girl wearing a unicorn shirt and colorful sunglasses pushed up on her head between her black hair (and owning it). In hopes of overcoming the awkwardness she continued to scan their stuff, her E/C eyes focused on the task, instead of him.
“I- I thought you were dead…” Logan finally got out, a sadness to his voice that told the story of a broken heart.
F/N glanced up from the bottle of liquor she was scanning, her brows pulled into a small frown. “Thought the same about you…”, her voice was just as soft as he'd remembered, but far more tired. “Heh…I guess everything got a bit chaotic after…” He didn't need to finish his sentence, how could she forget? “Yeah…I guess.”
Silence again, only interrupted by the beeping of the counter. “So…is she…”
Logan knew what she meant, she didn't need to finish her question. She probably thought he had moved on. But he would never. He couldn't. “This is Laura.”, He quickly replied, before continuing: “Uhm she's technically my daughter but I did not father her…she was an illegal experiment.” With a soft nod, F/N looked down at Laura, her eyes gentle and understanding: “Hey Laura” Logan scratched his salt and pepper beard, an awkward expression on his face: “She doesn't talk.”
F/N was still looking at Laura with a small yet warm smile on her pretty lips, almost like she recognized him in her: “I see. Well nice to meet you, Laura” Logan almost expected Laura to not react at all, like she did most times. But then the girl nodded softly, big brown eyes looking at F/N. Logan's heart hurt.
The obnoxious beeping of the cash register filled the stuffy air. Logan sighed: “Listen, do you maybe know a motel or something around here, where we could spend the night? I don't want Laura and Charles to sleep in the car again.” F/N frowned softly, surprise washing over her face yet again: “Wait- Charles? He's alive?” Logan nodded, leaning against the counter: “He sure as hell is…but he's not been doing well. Age is taking a real number on him.”
He half expected a comment about his own age, but it never came. F/N sighed softly pushing a few strands of H/C hair behind her ear, it was more than clear that they were struggling, that they needed help. If this little girl really was an illegal experiment, they probably were in some deep trouble.
“The next motel is about two hours away, I’m afraid.” Logan groaned quietly, rubbing his temple. F/N paused, she seemed to be considering something, her eyes finding his: “I don't live far from here. It's not much but I got a pull-out couch and a spare mattress.” she offered, voice careful as if she was unsure of this proposition herself.
Logan was reluctant to accept, he hadn't seen her in years and wanted to spend time with her but at the same time he didn't want to put her in danger or even be a bother. He had been one often enough in the past: “You don't have to offer this.” F/N shook her head, she could see his inner turmoil: “No, it's fine. I don't mind… and I could use the company” Her voice was tired yet firm, Logan could see her eyes wander to the bottle of Jack she'd just scanned, he could see the concern in her eyes, concern for him.
Did she know that he was just as concerned about her, that she was taking god knows what again? Just like all those years ago? He glanced down at Laura who was throwing curious glances at F/N, he could tell that she didn't want to sleep in the car again.
Finally, Logan nodded: “Alright.” A smile pulled at F/N's chapped lips, she glanced at the clock on the wall, then back at him. “Great, my shift ends in 15 minutes. You mind giving me a lift?” Logan nodded while F/N put their stuff into a bag: “That will be 37 dollars and 40 cents. Logan grunted fishing around in his wallet for the money, but it wasn't looking good, he quickly searched through his pockets, but luck wasn't with him. Shit. Sure, he had more money in the car but he didn’t wanna pay her with a five-hundred-dollar bill. She didn't need to know what kind of shady stuff he had been up to.
F/N watched him carefully: “How much do you have?” Logan scratched his head a little embarrassed, although he would never show it: “Uhm 30… but I have more in the car” She nodded, punching something into the register: “then it'll be 30 dollars, please” His eyes widened: “F/N- you can't -” She silenced him with the raise of her hand and a tired yet reassuring smile. “I'm already fired, it's fine.”
Logan sighed but nodded, handing her the thirty bucks: “Alright, I owe you” F/N simply shook her head. “Don't think I didn't see Laura putting candy into her pocket earlier” Of fucking course she had. “Laura”, his voice was a warning, but it was also tired and Laura simply shrugged. F/N chuckled softly, he'd missed that sound so fucking much “I don't get paid enough for this… And as of now, I don't work here anymore.”
Logan opened the door of his car for her, always the gentleman (or his job as a limo driver had influenced him more than he'd thought). “What took you so long- F/N!” Charles greeted her with a surprised smile. He looked older, more fragile and he seemed to have lost sight in one of his eyes. The once black pupil was now milky and blurry.
“It's good to see you too, Charles” She sat down in the passenger's seat, turning to him with a smile. It was a foreign feeling, there wasn't much to smile about lately “We thought you were dead!” F/N nodded, her heart aching at Charles’ words: “So much has happened but I'm glad you and Logan are alright” Charles scoffed: “Well I wouldn't say alright, he’s drinking like his life depends on it” F/N hummed, giving his hand a little squeeze: “I guessed as much” Charles nodded: “And you? Are you still taking those godforsaken pills?” Her lips formed a thin line, he was a lot more direct than he used to be. That much was clear, but at least he wasn't trying to read her mind anymore. Or maybe he couldn't.
She nodded softly: “I guess the years have not been kind to either of us” Logan cleared his throat, clearly not fond of the subject of their conversation as he started the car: “F/N is letting us stay at her home for the night. Be nice to her, old man.”
#logan x reader#logan howlett#james howlett#wolverine#wolverine x reader#marvel#fanfic#fanfiction#x men#laura kinney#charles xavier#hugh jackman#smut#x reader#hugh jackman x reader#logan x you#angst#fluff#Spotify#betting on a losing dog
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one thing about cultural christianity that i don't see talked about enough is that i think it's something a lot of jews can also fall victim to. especially if you live in an area where there aren't a lot of other jews and so you don't have easy access to resources like hebrew school and synagogue and jewish centers. but also even if you do. i'm jewish, i grew up jewish, both my parents are jewish and so are their parents and so were their parents, plus i grew up and still live in a highly jewish area, where schools took off for the high holidays. most of my peers went to hebrew school, and seventh grade was universally considered bar mitzvah season. and i took those things for granted. as a kid i chose not to go to hebrew school, not to get bat mitzvahed, and so much of what i know now about judaism—about jewish culture, jewish traditions, jewish holidays, jewish values, jewish beliefs—i only learned from being on tumblr.
when i was younger, like five or six, i asked my mom what happens after you die, and she said that your soul goes to heaven. and so for years i thought heaven and hell were universal beliefs. i didn't learn that jews don't believe in heaven or hell until my late teens. and in hindsight i can see why my mom told me that—you don't really want to scare a little kid by telling them that when you die you're just dead. but still.
and i grew up celebrating christmas. not in the sense that my family would go to chinese restaurants and see a movie in theaters, but in the sense that we put up a tree and raced downstairs first thing in the morning to open presents under the tree and gather with our extended family and eat christmas ham. still, there are a lot of christmas traditions we don't partake in, like stockings and caroling and elf on the shelf. the other day i had a friend come over and i showed her how many jewish ornaments were on my christmas tree—we have a star of david, a rabbi bear, and our tree topper is a dreidel—and she said something about it being a nice intersection of cultures. and it felt weird to hear her say that. i don't blame her for it, i know she meant well, but it would make more sense for someone to say that about someone with one jewish parent and one christian parent. and like i said, both my parents are jews. christianity doesn't intersect with my jewish culture, it invades it. maybe it was sort of a wake up call for me: you can decorate a christmas tree as jewishly as you like, but at the end of the day it's still a christmas tree. and so whenever i explain to people that i didn't have a bat mitzvah or that i celebrate christmas, it makes me feel like a bad jew.
i don't mean to imply that celebrating christmas makes you less jewish, or that you should be ashamed of yourself if you do. i just feel that way about myself. it's sort of that mentality of "everyone's valid except me," how there are things you say about yourself that you would never ever say about a friend. personally i would love to stop celebrating christmas, but i don't think i'll ever be able to, because even if/when i move out, my family will keep inviting me home for the holidays. and they have every right to. my family loves christmas, they love celebrating it, and i can't force them to stop. that's their choice. this holiday sparks joy for them, but for me it just sparks frustration and fatigue. and i don't want to ruin it for them, but i do want them to understand why i'm tired of celebrating an extremely hegemonic holiday.
idk if i'm articulating this well. i'm not really involved in the "discourse" around cultural christianity to begin with, but whenever i see it talked about it's usually in reference to atheists who used to be christian. but it's a lot more pervasive than that and i don't see that acknowledged very often.
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This is a long rant and I apologise if this comes off as too much 😅 I just want to let you know that I'm SO GLAD you're part of the star wars fandom. You're one of the few reasons my interest in this franchise has survived despite the toxicness that it has seeped into everything the past few years. Yes, star wars fandom has always been pretty much a mess but I feel like these days it's somehow gotten even worse. And there isn't even anything coming out that could distract everyone from the constant drama.
Your blog and your posts about the books are always a breath of fresh air in all this. I really appreciate that you take time to make all these long canon references and share them with us. And that you actually engage with canon content! For some reason that seems to be a tall order for most 'fans' these days.
It's exhausting seeing the ice cold takes about the jedi be repeated over and over again by people who seem to have barely even watched the films, let alone read the random book they're referencing to show how the jedi are So Evil and failed poor anakin by Forcing him to let go of his Attachments so they definitely deserved to all get massacred down to the last child!!! And if you push back by citing literally anything canonical to show how ridiculous their takes are they reference a random obscure legends novel (that they are often twisting and also usually haven't even read) And if you point out that, no, Legends isn't canon (and never has been) and we could discuss it as its own separate thing instead of dragging it into canon discussions, they completely flip and say they don't care and to stop taking star wars so seriously 🙄 ( u can probably tell I've had some pretty frustrating fandom arguments recently lol)
It does feel like groundhog day sometimes with the same arguments being repeated over and over again to villainize the jedi while absolving the genocidal mass enslaving space fascists that are Very Clearly the Bad Guys. And it feels pretty much deliberate at this point when people misunderstand star wars' canon definition of attachment and project all their issues in their own lives with their christian upbringing onto the space monks... This has only been exacerbated by people like Headland jumping onto the franchise and doing this with fuckass disney's approval, so now the racist anti jedi youtubers have started attacking this new anti jedi show so if I defend the jedi I get lumped in with them *sigh*
Anyway, I just listened to Padawan's Pride because of your posts and it was fun and a much needed palate cleanser for me after the months of anti jedi takes. I also started reading your jedi citations project and it's gotten me back into reading some other of my favorite jedi fics and maybe writing some of my own. So tldr; Thank You!
Oh, anon, I hear you and I went through a lot of similar feelings over the last few months. In between a lot of IRL stuff coming up and the fandom getting incredibly weird about Jedi fans (soooo much projection going on that it started getting unsettling sometimes) and the same old constant beratement on my posts, I was thinking that I was just too tired to deal with any of it.
It did get hard some days because it felt like no matter how hard I tried to be friendly and make a point to say that everyone needed to be allowed their space whether we agreed or not, that I would still get words put in my mouth or my posts misinterpreted or accused of trying to shut down other people's conversations, when I've never even interacted with that person, I've never reblogged anything from them, never talked about them, just made my own posts about the Jedi on my own blog.
That aspect of how, if we write posts that cite Lucas quotes or moments from the movies and shows, we're taking things too seriously (or the super weird one of how we're trying to "force" people to have to take Lucas' commentary as a holy grail or whatever), then we're taking it too seriously is SO REAL, I have been through that SO MUCH. And it's like, no! Nobody has to take authorial intention into consideration! But if you're going to say that I ~missed the point~ of what Lucas intended with the movies, I'm going to break out the Lucas quotes to show that, no, I didn't miss the point. You're still not obligated to agree, but the point is that I'm not coming out of nowhere with my views and deriding me as not a ~true fan~ or whatever is asshole behavior.
And it's hard to have that groundhogs day feeling, especially because you don't necessarily want to spend that time getting into arguments with people--they are allowed their own space, if they want it! But if they're coming into our space, then yes we get to respond with an essay if we like. (And, hey, some of us genuinely like writing essays, it's satisfying!) But I've found the best mindset for me to have when arguing is: I'm not going to convince this person in front of me and that's fine, they're not going to convince me, either. But there are other people watching this discussion and they are seeing which one of us is being a pill and which one of us looks kinda fun to hang out with.
Which is my way of winding around to what I really want to say--I'm so glad that I can help you want to have fun in this corner of fandom! There's always going to be times to respond with sharp edges to Jedi-critical stuff (especially when it starts dipping into the racist, xenophobic, bigoted nonsense)(not all of Jedi criticism is this, but it does happen all too often), I don't blame Jedi fans for having their nerves scraped raw by people feeling absolutely free to treat our posts like public property instead of them coming into someone else's lane to make a mess. (I've met some very nice Jedi critical people, this isn't about them, this is about the assholes.)
But is it really worth being in a fandom where that's all we do anymore? We can't avoid the negativity, we can't avoid people being assholes to us, but we can work on making the content we want to see at the end of a long day when we get home and log onto the computer and want to see something that makes us feel joyful.
I hope I'm doing my part to make it fun to stick around the fandom, to want to read some of the books or some of the fic, I love the artists who are drawing the cutest Jedi art, I love the fic writers who are writing great Jedi-positive stories, I love people who make silly shitposts about how funny the Jedi fan be, I love people who cry over the deaths of their favorite Jedi, they help make the fandom worthwhile.
It really does make a huge difference, I think! Whenever I need that same palette cleanser, I just take a week or so to push aside all discourse (don't even go look), just pick up some of my favorite Jedi fics, just go looking for some of my favorite Jedi art, reread "Padawan" or "Padawan's Pride" or "Obi-Wan & Anakin" or "The Living Force" or "Dark Rendezvous" and just spend time thinking about the things I love about the Jedi in canon, thinking up headcanons about lineages or nerdy Jedi philosophy arguments or adrenaline junkies, and it helps create the space I want to be in.
Hearing that I can help you with that is a huge boost as well--I hope you know that it helps me in return to know that we can help build something together here in our corner of the Star Wars internet. We're in this together and we can cheer each other up with cute content and I am getting out the pom-poms for you to have fun with that fic! <3
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Hey! Friendly reminder! While interfaith families exist and are great and I love hearing about the new traditions people create together, one cannot be Jewish and Christian simultaneously* (religiously speaking)! The belief systems actively contradict each other!
-signed, a very tired Jewish person
*Note that I am referring to religion-as-theology rather than religion-as-culture here
#isabel.tex#judaism#david jacobs#also related to this messianic 'jews' are not jewish.#also also. one can research this stuff. i spent ages researching Mormon/exMo culture and theology for bachelorette!Albert.#anyway thanks to longtime mutual javaberrychip98 for causing me to add that disclaimer
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The Toy General
Click for better res. Sketch, ref, and flower/symbolism explanation below cut :)
Sketch and Reference:
Flower/Symbolism explanation:
Marigolds- At the base of both Emperors' feet to symbolize their cruelty Yellow Chrysanthemums- Slighted love. Placed between Geta and Acacius as a nod to both subtext between the characters but also the betrayal Hyacinths- Representative of rashness and sporting/games, placed at the base of both emperors. Yellow to symbolize jealousy and Purple to symbolize an ask of forgiveness, an apology. A nod to Geta's conflicted feelings after the betrayal Jonquil- A yearn for love and desire for affection to be returned, placed between Acacius and Geta Nasturtium- Representative of conquest and victory in battle. Placed beneath Acacius' head and spilling out to give the illusion of his blood on the colosseum floor White Roses- Commonly associated with purity. A tongue in cheek nod to the fact none of these characters are truly innocent. All roses are wilting, most notably Acacius' as he grows tired and the roses at the base of the Emperors' are splashed with blood as a notice to their bloodthirsty ways with Caracalla's being noticeably more stained.
'Halo' of light centering around Acacius is a *very* subtle nod to a cut scene of a younger Acacius telling Lucius he will be the future of Rome, adding to the already canon credibility that he would immediately surrender and sacrifice himself for both Lucius and a hope for a better Rome and her people. Drawing parallel to Christian based/influenced portrayals of saints and martyrs in artwork
Geta's coloring is a reference to the og Gladiator and the outfits Commodus (another volatile and young ruler at the whims of his emotions) wears, often seen drenched in a purple/dark blue.
*Small note: this can be seen as both ship art and not. There's no wrong way to view this bc i meant it everyway it can be taken. At its bare bones in the movie they're just kids playing with their favorite toy until he stops playing along
#im gonna go hide in a hole now#marcus acacius#emperor geta#emperor caracalla#gladiator 2#general acacius
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VIRALITY // 11
11 - Peak Fashion
pairing: noah sebastian x fem!oc [vallie] 👀
masterlist: here | crossposted: ao3 | word count: 5k
warnings: angsty? but cute?, jealous nicholas, sassy but goofy noah, something revealed, very short time skips, 18+ MDNI
summary: vallie abruptly wakes to a million texts to meet for a last minute music video. upon arriving she discovers that the band is not at all prepared which sets her and noah on a mission.
Reminder: This contains the very mild crossover with Christian 'Kras' Anthony from Chase Atlantic ...... and introduces another extremely mild crossover 🫣 they are both merely for side character/reference purposes. Nothing huge, don’t worry lol just for fun
Disclaimer - This story is semi-AU since it does not follow actual timelines or events. The band is still fairly small & does things entirely on their own with no other support.
don't like it don't read it. don’t be mean for no reason & let others enjoy things thnx :)
VALLIE
Sunlight warms my eyelids and gently lulls me awake. My eyes shoot open at the realization that I have once again fallen asleep somewhere that isn’t my home – well my pseudo-home anyway. It seems that anywhere else feels homier than my showroom-esque Airbnb.
This time I don’t wake up in a panic, the smell of Christian’s woodsy cologne reassures me that I’m somewhere safe. The last time stamp I saw on my phone last night was 4:30 am. We had spent the whole night catching up, watching our favorite comfort shows, and binging all his favorite American snacks that he can’t get in Australia.
I reach over to the nightstand to grab my phone. A groan escapes me when I see that the time reads 8:47 am. My brows curve up at the ridiculous amount of notifications that fill my screen. While my job doesn’t really have “days off”, I had no specific plans or meetings booked for the day. So, it’s unexpected.
Most of them were from Bryan, the Omens’ photographer that I met at the warehouse with Noah. The messages flood my screen with missed calls and texts.
Bryan: Warehouse. 8 am.
Bryan: Hello? Are you awake?
Bryan: Music video. Today.
Bryan: I think you should be there.
Bryan: Hey!!! Music video !! Today !! 8 am !!
Bryan: Dude
Bryan: We’re starting. Show up whenever, if you want.
Fuck.
Kras continues to snooze next to me and I know that not even a plane crash could wake him up. So, I press a quick peck on his cheek before I roll out of bed and quickly begin gathering my belongings.
I’m rushing because well… Bryan seems like the only Omen who wants to cooperate or include me in any actual band activities. So, I have to be here. And I’m already an hour late.
I leave a small note on Christian’s dining table, saying how nice it was to see him, thanking him for the pep talk, and that I’ll see him and the rest of his band in a zoom meeting next Monday morning.
I’m still not sure if saying yes to his job offer was the right choice. I’m already stretched thin enough between my main client and now Omens, adding Chase might be more than I can handle. While my main client’s fanbase is much more… intensive, Chase Atlantic is still larger than both of them. And that swirls a terrifying pit of anxiety in my stomach because I’m not quite sure I’m equipped with enough experience to handle it all.
Gravel cracks beneath my tires as I pull up to the warehouse. I gather my bed head hair into the closest thing to a bun I can get it and try to rub off the slept in mascara smudged under my eyes.
My engine isn’t fully off for half a second before I’m out and locking my door.
I smooth out the exact same outfit I wore to Christian’s yesterday since I didn’t have time to stop home. Usually, I would never show up to a work event in sweatpants, a cropped cami, sneakers, and a flannel, but here we are. It’s not like the band is particularly formal anyway.
I see Folio and Jolly first, who both give me strange looks, like they’re surprised I’m here. Then, Noah and Nicholas once I get to the entrance. They seem equally as shocked too.
“What are you doing here?” Noah asks, lined with his usual snarky tone, seeming almost offended by my presence.
“I invited her.” Bryan speaks up from the background, adjusting the camera around his neck. “And you’re about an hour late by the way.”
Regardless of his criticism, he gives me a smile and a side hug – which surprises me.
Aside from Nicholas – for…obvious reasons – Bryan is the one who meets me with the most warmth out of the five of them.
I offer a closed lipped smile and a small awkward wave to the band. I wasn’t prepared to accidentally crash a music video shoot.
“Nice outfit, you just get out of bed?” Noah quips.
I roll my sleep-deprived eyes, “Nice to see you too, Noah.”
The rest of the band disperses into whatever they were doing before I arrived.
Nick walks up to me and I can tell he’s trying his best to act casual.
“Hey.” He says simply but quietly between us.
“Hey.” I match his somewhat awkward tone.
My gaze reluctantly meets his and I immediately regret it. His hair is pulled up into a fluffy ponytail with his hair flat against his head and he looks so good.
This was going to be more difficult than I thought.
“Val?” He asks trying to get my attention.
“Huh?” I shake my head from the fuzz sitting in my brain.
“Oh, I just said it’s nice to see you.” He says demurely. “I’m glad you’re here.”
I take note of the dullness of his normally bright eyes, and the dark bags beneath them. It makes me wonder if he got as little sleep as I did.
The energy of this whole ordeal is so… odd. It makes me feel as though I’m once again missing parts of a puzzle that I’m not aware of.
His gives me a once over and lingers a bit on my flannel.
“Oh! Right!” I set my bag down on a nearby table before slipping the flannel off my arms, giving it a lazy fold, and offering it over to him. “Here have it back.”
He instinctively takes the folded garment, looking at it like I just handed him the wrong Chipotle order. His brows furrow, initially in confusion then into something much different.
Before he responds it hits me.
I fucked up.
Fuck
Fuck
Fuck
“This isn’t mine.” He states in a slighted tone.
“Oh- Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t get much sleep last night–“ I immediately realize that probably wasn’t the best thing to follow that up with. “I just need a coffee.”
“Right.” He lands the flannel back in my hands. He goes to pass me and stops as he’s grazing my shoulder. “And who’s ever it is, has shitty taste in cologne.”
My eyes widen.
Did I just put Kras’ proposed scheme into action by accident?
It’s fine.
It’s perfectly fine.
I’m fine.
I discreetly shake out the tips of my fingers and glance up to finally take in my surroundings fully. The floor is covered in a massive tarp, covered in… dirt?
I steal the phone from my tote pocket and carefully walk over to where Bryan is messing with some equipment. I shuffle right up next to him and whisper, “What…exactly is happening here?”
“I don’t know. Noah just woke us all up at the ass crack of dawn and said we needed to do this today.” Bryan shrugs, not stopping his actions for me, and continues walking carrying a large umbrella light.
“…and you all just went along with it?”
“Listen. I just work here man.” He sets down the heavy light and sighs dramatically.
I can’t help but chuckle at his verbiage.
“Okay… and why did you have to drag me into this?”
“Well, you have a job to do, don’t you?” He questions as if he doesn’t know the answer.
“I mean y-“ I begin but he cuts me off.
“Exactly.” He walks back over to a pile of equipment on a plastic table, and I follow him around like a puppy while he talks. “And you want them to like you, yes?”
“Well, I mean,” My eyes glance over at Nicholas who’s sat on a stool tuning a teal bass. The memories of our bodies entwined graze over my tongue and his working fingers sends a tingle between my legs.
Well, one of them likes me.
Is my first reflex to say.
But I’m not even sure if that’s true, especially not now. I should know better than to trust band boys anyway. I manage them, I’ve been around them since the start of my career. I’ve been best friends with Kras for nearly a decade. I’ve seen what band men do. How they treat the women they use to get off, even the ones they love.
“Look. They need you.” He says, his tone more serious than before and leans against the wall beside him with crossed arms. “Whether they believe it or not, they need you. You and I both know that. If Noah wants to be an arrogant, stubborn asshole, then let him. But don’t give up on them. They just need time.” His eyes drift to the four of them messing around with their instruments. “You’re stuck with them one way or another. And they’re not a bad bunch to be stuck with. Trust me.” He gives me a half smile before nudging my arm. “Loosen up a little, you might find that you like ‘em.”
Bryan pushes himself off the wall going to find some other task and I’m left with this peptalk I wasn’t expecting, especially from him.
I take the time to watch them, really watch them. Noah is well … Noah, so there’s some grumpy tension that follows him – but the rest of them, even while grumpy and irritated, flow together effortlessly.
Noah ripped everyone from their sleep and yet, they’re still all here. Sure, you could write that off as good work ethic, but I think it’s more than that. As unpredictable as he is, they let Noah lead them. At least for the most part.
They all showed up for him today and the whole time I’ve known them.
‘This band is all he has.’ Nicholas’ words echo in my ears from that rainy night in his car.
Maybe they all know that, and maybe they all honor it.
They all love him enough to show up and keep showing up.
Christian is right. I can’t let my feelings cloud this. If not for me, then for them.
As I clear from my dissociation, I realize I must’ve hyper fixated on their bustling about because the only thing I see now is their attire… or the lack thereof.
“Wait, wait, wait.” I cautiously step around the piles of dirt on a brown tarp to reach Noah. “Is this the whole outfit? This is what you’re wearing for the video?”
Noah sighs in exasperation and drops the corner of tarp he’s holding to face me. “Yes? Do you have a problem with it?”
“Problem with it? It is the problem.” I give him a once over, just black jeans and plain grey shirt with a faded CocaCola logo on it. I reach to his sides and give the seems a small tug to pull the logo taught against his thin chest. “You see that? What does that look like to you?”
Noah raises a snarky brow at me, “A Coke logo?”
“Wrong. That-” I drop the edges of his shirt and stab his sternum with my finger. “That is unpaid brand advertising.”
I can tell he immediately wants to roll his eyes but doesn’t when he realizes I’m right.
The rest of the boys wear similar outfits, jeans, t-shirts, hoodies.
“Okay, well this is all we brought last minute, and the house is like an hour away, I’m not driving back there.”
There’s no way I’m letting them shoot an entire video in dirt with such casual outfits. I tug at my lip and tap my fingertips on my arm in thought.
As if a lightbulb appears above my head, a possible solution crosses my mind.
“I think I saw a thrift shop in that strip where the bar is.” I shrug, “I can try to find something there. But I can’t just let you play around in dirt like this.”
Noah raises his brows and crosses his tattooed arms across his chest, “Well I’m sure as fuck not letting you pick out outfits for us.”
I walk over to my bag, picking up easily and walking towards the warehouse opening. “Then you better hurry up and get in my car.”
Noah and I had been looking through racks of dusty clothes for about 10 minutes without speaking to each other. I knew a thrift shop was somewhat of a risky choice, but after not seeing anything worth shit for a bit had me nervous.
I’m not sure why I’m nervous – but I shouldn’t be making risky bold decisions with them.
Across the racks I catch Noah picking up a thick peacoat. At first glance, I find it absolutely repulsive, but for a music video? It could be exactly what we need. At least it’d be better than a Coca-Cola shirt. For the vibe I think he’s going for, it might be perfect.
He lifts up the hanger and flips it around, his brows knitting intently at it. He likes it.
I haven’t known him that long, but he’s pretty transparent, no matter how mysterious he thinks he is.
I quickly divert my eyes back down when he goes to return the coat to its place on the rack. I know that if I say I like it, he’ll immediately be against it, so I keep my mouth shut.
“So, what kinda vibe are you going for?” I ask casually.
He glares over at me, “What do you care? Changing our clothes was your idea remember?”
“Whoa.” I put my hands up in defense. “I’m just trying to help.”
“Well, I’m sure you wanna put us in the same preppy clothes you put your other big mysterious client in. Which I’m still convinced is Harry Styles by the way.”
I roll my eyes knowing which “client” he’s referring to since I haven’t mentioned that I took on a third one yet. He means the first one, the one that landed me here in the first place, my ‘big success’. At least that’s what they kept telling me when sitting in meeting after meeting getting pitched different ‘next big artists’. And somehow, I got stuck with Noah & friends™️.
“No, it’s not Harry and I don’t put them in preppy clothes.” I reply absentmindedly sifting through hangers.
“Them?” He picks up on my slip immediately and my eyes widen slightly. “It’s a band?”
I clear my throat and shake my head. “No – no that’s not what I–“
“It is, isn’t it?” His brows lower at me. “It better not be a conflict of interest, that would be a breach of contract and I-“
“Relax. I’m not stupid, I wouldn’t have signed contract if it was a conflict of interest.” I glare over at him with annoyed, tired eyes.
I sigh then allow my tense shoulders to roll back. “Yes. It’s a band. But they aren’t a heavy band they’re ehm…. more classic rock, hippie-ish?” I shake my head. “And trust me, I would NOT put you or the rest of you in any of their clothes.”
I press my lips together trying to stifle a giggle that threatens to escape at the thought of Noah in a glitzy jumpsuit.
“What’s so funny?” He furrows his brows at me in offense. “You don’t think I could pull off some hippie clothes?” He asks seriously, but I can tell he doesn’t believe it either, he’s just trying to be difficult.
Then it occurs to me that this reverse-psychology defiant behavior may work to my advantage.
“No, actually. I don’t think you could.” I shrug, sliding some clothes over. “Just like I don’t think you could pull off that hideous peacoat.”
His brows rise higher than I’ve ever seen them. “Oh really? Maybe that’ll be the one I choose then.”
Checkmate.
I ignore it to not put too much emphasis on it. “You never told me what’s the vibe you want.”
“Hm.” He pauses, maybe he doesn’t even know. “I’m not sure. Cult-y? Business-y? Underground elite secret society-y?”
“Wow.” I say with wide, surprised eyes and exaggerating my mouth around the word. “That’s… specific. And you planned to achieve that with graphic tees?”
“Shut up.”
“Right.”
“Would I know your other band?” He inquires, the curiosity obviously eating at him.
“Shut up.”
“Right.”
We continue to mind our own business in our individual searches while early 2000’s pop plays through the small, dingy shop.
Out of the corner of my eye, I catch Noah lifting up an obviously homemade PitBull t-shirt.
I can’t help but let out a loud laugh.
He snaps his head over at me with a goofy grin, “What you don’t think Mr. Worldwide is peak fashion?”
I shake my head laughing, “No, I definitely wouldn’t say he is.”
“I think this might be the most badass piece of clothing I’ve ever seen.” He seems half serious and half trying to hold back a cackle.
“It’s a… choice. But you know what? It might be perfect for you.”
He feigns offense, “Why because you think I’m so badass?”
A laugh erupts from me. “Yeah. Sure.”
“Well, I’m getting it. I might wear it in the video.” He throws the white shirt into his cart.
“Great.” I reply sarcastically.
The search seemed to be going a bit better the further we dig. I found a couple pieces that might work for the rest of the band to fit into Noah’s vaguely hyper-specific theme. He’s done the same, just not as successfully.
Across the aisle I notice his hands grasping the sides of a hideous white puffy jacket with patches of sherpa all over it and an oversized hood. The nylon material rasps as he rubs it between his inked fingertips. My brows curve at how he looks at it like it’s some lost treasure.
He pauses before turning to me, lifting it up to showcase its entirety.
“What do you think about this?” He asks genuinely, which throws me off. It sounds so authentic, so real, and not hidden behind any sort of sassy, crude walls, or ulterior motives. I don’t know if he’s ever truly talked to me like that before, especially not sober.
I’m still cautious since he’s fooled me before, so I stay neutral by lifting my shoulders to a shrug. “I don’t know. Why don’t you try it on?”
He eagerly scoots past his cart that takes up the entire aisle and walks to the mirror. The thick zipper hisses at how quickly he undoes it, like he’s been waiting his whole life for this moment.
I watch him in some form of awe, maybe it’s more curiosity of his behavior. The more I get to know him, the stranger he seems.
He slips his skinny arms through the sleeves, and it fits him loosely but just right, like it’s made for him – though that doesn’t detract from how it still looks a little ridiculous, just less so now that it’s on him.
He turns back to me and spreads out his arms like a child showing off a Halloween costume.
“Well?” He questions.
“I mean the jacket is still pretty silly.” I chuckle. “But it looks nice on you.” I compliment honestly.
A toothy grin spreads across his mouth and turns back to the mirror, “Yeah, I think so too.”
Quiet falls between us again and we move on to different sections. I get so focused on rifling through the clothes that I realize I’ve lost track of Noah. I scan the small store and can’t spot him.
“Noah?” I call and as if right on cue, I feel something dropped around my head followed by a scurrying Noah.
“What the hell?” I reach up and catch the edges of the large hat pulling it off and finding that he’s dropped a massive sombrero on my head. “Hey!”
He chuckles and pulls his shoulders to a shrug, “Might be perfect for you.” He mocks my words from before about the Pitbull shirt.
“Ha-ha very funny.” I roll my eyes playfully. “I’ll get you back.”
“Bring it on.”
What follows is a series of us trying to find the most ridiculous shit to throw on or at each other.
First, I got an ugly, dusty, grandma shawl that I threw on Noah’s shoulders as best as I could before quickly walking in the other direction.
Then, when I wasn’t paying attention and with great stealth, he was able to drop a yellowing Disney rain poncho over my body.
Now, he’s stood in front of a full-length mirror holding up various different pieces of black clothing. In my stroll through the hat section, I found a leopard print fedora perfect for his big head. I sneak up behind him, making sure not to get in frame of the mirror. I reach up on my tip toes to somewhat reach his head, tossing the hat up to bridge the rest, hoping that it would land.
It does land, crooked atop his head.
I cover my mouth to hide a chuckle before backing away slowly. Before I can make my escape, he snaps his head over in my direction, jostling the hat to fly off his head. In a swift move, he catches it with fumbling hands.
“Hey that’s not fair! You’re tiny and fast!” He plops the leopard fedora back on his head and anchors a fist at each hip playfully.
The goofy sight of it all makes me double over nearly cackling. “It’s not my fault you’re big and clunky!”
He pulls the flimsy hat off his head, squishing it thin between his fingers pointing at me. “You better watch your back, Thornhill.”
“Ooh, you’re so scary, Sebastian.” I tease with raised hands feigning fear.
“You think you’re so funny huh?” He speaks directly at me probably trying to distract me, but I catch him snatching another random hat off the rack while he slowly makes his way towards me.
My eyes glance at down at his actions and I make a run for it. I don’t know what I expected but, he chases me around the thrift shop like we’re little kids in a toy store. I stealthily weave through metal racks full of musty clothes trying to lose him, giggles pouring from both our mouths.
I ignore the judging looks from the employees and the few patrons shopping around us. It’s a blessing that I can’t hear the murmuring around us. My ears are full of only my own heartbeat and the sound of his playful and competitive laughter.
It’s then that I realize I hadn’t fully heard him laugh before, not sober anyway, and it’s so… endearing. It’s one of those laughs that’s contagious and only makes you laugh harder. Which isn’t something I expected from him. None of this is really what I expected.
He finally corners me in the scarf section. I spin around in the tiny space between us and within that split second he’s snatched a bizarrely colored thin scarf and throws it around my neck like a towel, keeping hold of each end.
Just as fast, I grasp a similar scarf and match his actions, throwing the scarf up around his neck. With the speed and rush of the motion, I accidentally tugged him closer and lower to me.
My eyes flutter up and the edges of his laughing grin shorten when his eyes meet mine. Unexpectedly, my breath hitches in my throat. I never noticed just how chocolate-y brown his eyes were until now. Normally his eyes are so serious or angry or… drunk, but right now, they’re wide and warm and just as confused as mine. His eyes shift side to side seemingly searching mine for something I’m not quite sure of.
Being this close to him really emphasizes just how tall he is, the top of my head barely meets his shoulders and for some reason, that realization makes my heart thump harder against my ribcage.
I’m frozen where I stand, I should pull away, but I can’t. I shouldn’t enjoy the butterflies that run rampant in my tummy. It’s just Noah after all. The asshole that somehow always ends up drunk on the floor. The one that tells me how to do my job and how not to manage him. The one that told Nick that I’m a ‘stuck-up corporate bitch’.
But, that’s the same Noah that’s chasing me around this store like we’re playing tag on a playground.
My tummy twists and my breath sharply lodges itself in my throat when I catch his eyes dart to my lips – once.
Twice.
He moves closer, just marginally, and then again – eyes, lips.
I mimic his actions, my eyes flicker from his brown eyes to light pink lips.
Then he’s even closer – so close I can feel his exhaled breath brush past my nose.
Again.
Eyes, lips.
I feel his knuckles just graze my shirt where he’s still holding the scarf at either end and it sends electricity down to my fingertips.
Then, a strand of his long brown hair falls from behind his ear, and it seems to snap him from our daze. He lets out an awkward chuckle, steps back and slides the scarf off my neck by one end.
“We should probably wrap up here… I’m sure the guys are sick of waiting for us.” He scratches the back of his neck and diverts his eyes from me.
It seems like the right thing to do, but for some reason it leaves me a little disappointed.
Disappointed in what exactly?
What the fuck just happened?
I pull the scarf off of him in the same manner and hang it back up on its hook. “Yeah, that’s probably a good idea.”
Checking out is hushed and awkward as we stand next to each other in front of the workers that had to watch us nearly destroy the store.
We walk out silently until I notice that he’s walking out with the leopard print fedora proudly plopped on his head.
“You really bought that stupid hat?” I chuckle calling after him carrying 2 heavy, giant bags full of clothes.
“Yeah duh-“ He begins looking back but trips over his feet across the exit door frame.
I bring a plastic bag-occupied hand up to cover my mouth to hide a giggle.
“Shut up.” He directs me with a pointed hand even though I hadn’t said anything.
“Has anyone ever told you that you’re kinda goofy?” I laugh, shaking my head and clicking my key fob to unlock the car.
“Goofy?” He gasps as if he’s offended. “Valerie this is peak fashion.”
I chuckle and roll my eyes, “Get in the fucking car, will you?”
He laughs and matches my actions of throwing the heavy bags in the backseat. He slides in the passenger of my blue Mercedes rental and the clunky weight of his lanky body shakes the small car. He stuffs his legs into the tiny, allotted space for them. I would make a comment about how large he is, but I’m not in the business of boosting men’s egos.
I press the push-to-start and begin navigating my way out of the parking lot. It takes a bit for my phone to connect and begin playing music, but when it does it fills the car with a familiar tune.
Noah reaches over and spins the dial to turn up the music. It doesn’t fully register in my mind what song it is until Noah speaks up.
“Is this the hippie rock band you’re representing?” He asks, a bit of sharpness to his voice.
“I-I well, no, I just-“ I’m caught off guard and stutter. I’m new to handling more than one client and having them not know about each other seemed like the best course of action. But I particularly didn’t want Noah to know since I knew he’d compare what I do with others with what I do with them.
“It is, isn’t it?” He snaps. “You manage Greta Van Fleet?”
“I… well,” I pause then sigh out of pure exhaustion. “Yes. I manage them.” I say flatly, somewhat annoyed. “I don’t really think that’s any of your business though.”
He’s silent for a moment, seemingly just taking in the song – Lover, Leaver.
“You’re right. They’re nothing like us.” He announces simply. “The voice on that singer is insane though.”
I can’t stop my brows from furrowing, and from one abruptly propping up.
He’s not upset.
He’s not upset?
“Yeah… I know.” I reply cautiously, glancing over at him to decipher the unbothered look on his face.
“Well, don’t look so surprised, they’re good. I can appreciate good music, can’t I?” He lets a few moments pass. “I don’t know what I was expecting, but it wasn’t this. They sound so familiar…” He trails off in thought.
“I know, you were expecting Harry Styles.” I joke. “But it’s not, so you can chill.” I tap my fingertips across the leather steering wheel.
“I knew it wasn’t Harry.” He shifts in his seat, crossing his arms across his skinny waist with his hands draping over his sides. He rests his head on the door looking out the window. “If it was, you wouldn’t have taken us.”
“I bet you wish it was Harry Styles then huh?” I say as a somewhat half joke and glance over at him while mindlessly tapping my fingertips on the steering wheel. He stays silent, just watching the trees go by. I can’t tell if the silence is intentional or if he’s just zoned out.
Some time passes before he returns to the conversation.
“Well, I don’t care if you represent them. Just know that I’m not dressing up like some wizard man like your other singer.” He warns firmly with a playful pointed finger.
“I wouldn’t dream of it, Sebastian.”
Next Chapter -> 12 - Liar, Liar*
tag list; @ladyveronikawrites @kingdomof-omens @persuasivus @strawberryruffilo @thebadchic @the-hell-i-overcame @sinkingteethinwhitenoise @cncohshit @dominuslunae [comment if you'd like to be tagged?]
A/N: Thank you if you've made all the way to chp 11! lol thank you for reading anything i write. thank you so much for every like, reblog, ask, or comment. It means the world to me truly. Thank you.
i love hearing your thoughts so feel free to share! (i'm really bad at responding to comments/asks but i still love them 🥺)
#can i get a w in the chat for noah character development finally#noah sebastian fanfic#noah sebastian fanfiction#bad omens fanfic#bad omens fanfiction#noah sebastian x ofc#noah sebastian x oc#noah sebastian fluff#nicholas ruffilo fanfic#nicholas ruffilo fic#noah sebastian fic#nick ruffilo fanfiction#nick ruffilo fanfic#nick ruffilo rpf#noah sebastian rpf#bad omens rpf#concreteburialplot works#virality update#virality series#noah sebastian x fem!oc
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"affair" oh so your Link is a two timer lmfao. How very "christian"
1: I meant affair as in "an event or sequence of events of a specified kind or that has previously been referred to", but with the double entendre that the rumour magazine was inferring Zelda had a thing for Link.
2: I created a fake trashy rumour magazine so even if it said that he was having an affair, which it didn't, the idea is that it is unreliable narrator. That's the joke.
3: No my Link isn't a two timer, he is faithful to Mipha.
4: what does my faith have to do with this? are you trying to demean me for it (if so tired insult, come up with something more creative)? Are you questioning my validity as a christian for posting this (absurd but I'll take it as caring concern for my spiritual life, so thank you, but I am very secure in my faith)? Or are you implying that I have made my version of Link a hypocrite because he is a christian (he isn't, the Zelda pantheon is very different to real life, so he isn't a Christian)? Honestly I have no idea what you're saying there.
#creativesplat rambles#I am confused#is this a normal ask to receive??#I am so confused#beath of the wild#I guess?
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TTRPG Read-Through: Patchwork World
Here is a read-through I did last year (originally posted on Twitter) of one of the most unique PbtA games I've ever read: Patchwork World by Aaron King! - Christian
Credits up first. I know a lot of these folks and they are really cool! Excited to dig into this. I've heard good things, and it's been a while since I've read or played any Powered by the Apocalypse.
This is a cool, strong set up for me. I really like settings that ask characters to face a changing world and either take up change themselves or work to restore the old way of things. It's a headspace I find myself in a lot IRL these days so it's fun to explore.
I'm interested to see how the no stats, no playbooks angle of this game works, considering playbooks are typically such a staple of PbtA games.
Standard three-tired success, mixed success, fail forward resolution for rolls here and questions on the moves determine your bonus to the roll. Easy peasy. +2 is the max bonus.
Other types of rolls are described here. Interested to see how they come into play. I also love clocks and use them in pretty much every game I run so it's nice to see those laid out here too.
We just love a lil guy, don't we folks?
A good chunk of the opening here is spent on laying out a lot of solid foundations of roleplaying generally. It feels like a book (so far) that would work for entirely new players. It doesn't feel essential for me, but I never mind a game that supports varied experience levels.
Character creation is wide open, especially since there aren't playbooks and the text stresses that character creation is very much worldbuilding because of this. Fate-like concepts and tags are in here too which are things I generally enjoy. I like the Drawback mechanic.
Moves are in the playback I set in the other room so I'm gonna go grab those. You get two chosen moves and everyone has access to a number of default moves. You've got three other life/XP things to keep track of too. I'm especially interested in Hex.
There are a lot of moves! They seem quite varied and often very weird, fitting well with the titular patchwork world. You can have a duck's slick soul to dodge more easily or a magical space suit or speak to birds or be good at cartography. Overwhelming, but in an exciting way.
You also choose a community as a party. While PCs all have their original homelands (before the end of the old worlds), you know have a community that gets its own little sheet. This is a cool reshaping of the Gangs from Blades. I also like how the community can change over time.
Coming back to a PbtA game after months of more OSR-minded stuff, I think a lot of what these games contain are things that experienced players would say you could just do in any game at any time that it makes sense in the story, but I do find value in stating what's possible.
Esp since many players come to games with artificial limits on their options (whether that's from video games, more traditional RPGs, etc.). I just think good GMing here requires making sure that the players don't limit themselves just to the bevy of explicit options either.
GM moves (mostly to guide the response to failed rolls). I really think the community aspect of this set up is one of the biggest appeals to me so far. That and the wild list of moves, which I'm sure makes for amazing parties of characters.
I always feel like it's never something I should be in my own writing (for some probably unnecessary reason), but I enjoy the first-person, casual writing style throughout the book. Makes for a very chill read.
Good to see this game employs the Branson Reese style of NPC naming.
Stress acts as a single catch-all health and challenge rating for NPCs. Ideally, I'd hope this would help lead to the PCs approaching encounters with more than just violence.
Sections like this are what I'm referring to when I say this book feels very friendly to new players. It's got little anecdotes and thoughts like this throughout.
Look, it's been a while since I've seen A Christmas Story but... it didn't have ghosts in it right?
There's a sample adventure in the back (which I'll skip for this read-through) plus loads of random tables. Some wonderfully bizarre stuff in the characters and faction tables. Really gives you a good idea for how gonzo you can go with the setting.
Love these two in particular
Optional rules include hard mode (which I just think is kind of funny to see in PbtA, but could be cool if you lean heavy into the post-apoc setting) and some optional moves. I like that some moves focus on romance, something I enjoy IRL but never think to focus on in games.
I was wondering why this was the sixth edition!
That's all for the book itself. Going back to the packet to dig into the things I missed. Some expected bits in here but always one or two unique options I really enjoy. Leaking hex is cool (and could have some troubling cascade effects in certain situations).
I definitely wish, at least in sitting down to read like this, that the contents of the player packet was also in the book itself. I think PbtA has this tendency of leading to loads of pages on the table, but it can make them very easy to pick up and play or to learn as you play.
That element is definitely here, but I think the vast number of wide-ranging moves and the excitement that would drum up in my player group would more than makeup for that initial overwhelming feel of "whoa, that's a lot of papers out on the table".
Overall, it's the most I've wanted to play a game in this style in a while. I like that the base setup for the world is very much up to the players to determine via the characters they make. I like that PCs here will probably feel unlike any other folks have played before.
The community aspect feels like where I'd want to center my story around, as a player. Seeing that shift and change over time feels like it would be very rewarding and would help lean into the "the old world is dead, what do we want the new world to look like?" theme I enjoy.
Because Aaron King is cool and recently hit a lot of Twitter followers, Patchwork Worlds is now Pay-what-you-want over on Itch.
I'm not sure if physical copies are readily available. For full disclosure (guess I should have said this up front), I got this copy for free from Aaron! Not for the purposes of this thread or anything, just for fun a while back.
Thanks for reading more ramblings from me! If you like to do that sort of thing, check out my newsletter - Missives from the MeatCastle. It's got writings on my work, cool stuff I've run across the web in the last month, and exclusive rpg stuff! https://meatcastle.substack.com
#indie ttrpg#ttrpg#ttrpgs#rpg#fantasy#science fiction#pbta#powered by the apocalypse#aaron king#patchworld world#sixth edition#read through
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