#very rude<3< /div>
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”Princess I’m bored.” Chuuya huffed, sprawling across the couch surrounded by two different fans. Dazai glanced up, just as exhausted but always having the energy to mess with Chuuya.
“Princess?”
“That’s what you call yourself all the time, no? And it fits you. Dainty, fragile, always makes me fight for them.” They grinned, glancing at Chuuya like he gave them free bait.
“I suppose that makes you my Prince Charming then?” Dazai leaned forward, teasing at Chuuya’s choker with an absentminded care. They pretended not to notice the shiver it caused, at least for now.
”Knight in shining armor.” Chuuya rolled his eyes, smacking Dazai’s hands away. This did the complete opposite of deterring them, instead pressing Dazai to remove the choker entirely. “Oi what are you-“
“I don’t think my dear knight should be wearing his armor so long in this weather. It wouldn’t be good for his wonderful skin.~” Dazai‘s Cheshire grin only widened, hands dropping down to Chuuya’s gloves.
“You’re a freak…” But for some reason he didn’t push away. A part of him felt a buzz in his chest, but he could think about it later.
“The best kind of princess, don’t you agree?”
“I don’t think you fit the bill of Princess anymore.” Chuuya watched as Dazai stood and approached him in one fluid motion, kneeling by where he laid on the couch. He wrapped his fingers around Chuuya’s wrists, bringing them together despite the angle of his arms.
“Very true. I don’t suppose a Princess could do this?” But before he could protest his gloves being removed, Dazai bit.
bfosbgosngodngks Rai please
#ypu always come running into my inbox with my weaknesses#very rude<3#skk#fiv#h a n d s#HANDS AND GLOVES AND BITES AND GODBGODNFONS#Rai<3
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Very interesting to me that a certain subset of the BES fandom's favourite iterations of Mizu and Akemi are seemingly rooted in the facades they have projected towards the world, and are not accurate representations of their true selves.
And I see this is especially the case with Mizu, where fanon likes to paint her as this dominant, hyper-masculine, smirking Cool GuyTM who's going to give you her strap. And this idea of Mizu is often based on the image of her wearing her glasses, and optionally, with her cloak and big, wide-brimmed kasa.
And what's interesting about this, to me, is that fanon is seemingly falling for her deliberate disguise. Because the glasses (with the optional combination of cloak and hat) represent Mizu's suppression of her true self. She is playing a role.
Take this scene of Mizu in the brothel in Episode 4 for example. Here, not only is Mizu wearing her glasses to symbolise the mask she is wearing, but she is purposely acting like some suave and cocky gentleman, intimidating, calm, in control. Her voice is even deeper than usual, like what we hear in her first scene while facing off with Hachiman the Flesh-Trader in Episode 1.
This act that Mizu puts on is an embodiment of masculine showboating, which is highly effective against weak and insecure men like Hachi, but also against women like those who tried to seduce her at the Shindo House.
And that brings me to how Mizu's mask is actually a direct parallel to Akemi's mask in this very same scene.
Here, Akemi is also putting up an act, playing up her naivety and demure girlishness, using her high-pitched lilted voice, complimenting Mizu and trying to make small talk, all so she can seduce and lure Mizu in to drink the drugged cup of sake.
So what I find so interesting and funny about this scene, characters within it, and the subsequent fandom interpretations of both, is that everyone seems to literally be falling for the mask that Mizu and Akemi are putting up to conceal their identities, guard themselves from the world, and get what they want.
It's also a little frustrating because the fanon seems to twist what actually makes Mizu and Akemi's dynamic so interesting by flattening it completely. Because both here and throughout the story, Mizu and Akemi's entire relationship and treatment of each other is solely built off of masks, assumptions, and misconceptions.
Akemi believes Mizu is a selfish, cocky male samurai who destroyed her ex-fiance's career and life, and who abandoned her to let her get dragged away by her father's guards and forcibly married off to a man she didn't know. on the other hand, Mizu believes Akemi is bratty, naive princess who constantly needs saving and who can't make her own decisions.
These misconceptions are even evident in the framing of their first impressions of each other, both of which unfold in these slow-motion POV shots.
Mizu's first impression of Akemi is that of a beautiful, untouchable princess in a cage. Swirling string music in the background.
Akemi's first impression of Mizu is of a mysterious, stoic "demon" samurai who stole her fiance's scarf. Tense music and the sound of ocean waves in the background.
And then, going back to that scene of them together in Episode 4, both Mizu and Akemi continue to fool each other and hold these assumptions of each other, and they both feed into it, as both are purposely acting within the suppressive roles society binds them to in order to achieve their goals within the means they are allowed (Akemi playing the part of a subservient woman; Mizu playing the part of a dominant man).
But then, for once in both their lives, neither of their usual tactics work.
Akemi is trying to use flattery and seduction on Mizu, but Mizu sees right through it, knowing that Akemi is just trying to manipulate and harm her. Rather than give in to Akemi's tactics, Mizu plays with Akemi's emotions by alluding to Taigen's death, before pinning her down, and then when she starts crying, Mizu just rolls her eyes and tells her to shut up.
On the opposite end, when Mizu tries to use brute force and intimidation, Akemi also sees right through it, not falling for it, and instead says this:
"Under your mask, you're not the killer you pretend to be."
Nonetheless, despite the fact that they see a little bit through each other's masks, they both still hold their presumptions of each other until the very end of the season, with Akemi seeing Mizu as an obnoxious samurai swooping in to save the day, and Mizu seeing Akemi as a damsel in distress.
And what I find a bit irksome is that the fandom also resorts to flattening them to these tropes as well.
Because Mizu is not some cool, smooth-talking samurai with a big dick sword as Akemi (and the fandom) might believe. All of that is the facade she puts up and nothing more. In reality, Mizu is an angry, confused and lonely child, and a masterful artist, who is struggling against her own self-hatred. Master Eiji, her father figure who knows her best, knows this.
And Akemi, on the other hand, is not some girly, sweet, vain and spoiled princess as Mizu might believe. Instead she has never cared for frivolous things like fashion, love or looks, instead favouring poetry and strategy games instead, and has always only cared about her own independence. Seki, her father figure who knows her best, knows this.
But neither is she some authoritative dominatrix, though this is part of her new persona that she is trying to project to get what she wants. Because while Akemi is willful, outspoken, intelligent and authoritative, she can still be naive! She is still often unsure and needs to have her hand held through things, as she is still learning and growing into her full potential. Her new parental/guardian figure, Madame Kaji, knows this as well.
So with all that being said, now that we know that Mizu and Akemi are essentially wearing masks and putting up fronts throughout the show, what would a representation of Mizu's and Akemi's true selves actually look like? Easy. It's in their hair.
This shot on the left is the only time we see Mizu with her hair completely down. In this scene, she's being berated by Mama, and her guard is completely down, she has no weapon, and is no longer wearing any mask, as this is after she showed Mikio "all of herself" and tried to take off the mask of a subservient housewife. Thus, here, she is sad, vulnerable, and feeling small (emphasised further by the framing of the scene). This is a perfect encapsulation of what Mizu is on the inside, underneath all the layers of revenge-obsession and the walls she's put around herself.
In contrast, the only time we Akemi with her hair fully down, she is completely alone in the bath, and this scene takes place after being scorned by her father and left weeping at his feet. But despite all that, Akemi is headstrong, determined, taking the reigns of her life as she makes the choice to run away, but even that choice is reflective of her youthful naivety. She even gets scolded by Seki shortly after this in the next scene, because though she wants to be independent, she still hasn't completely learned to be. Not yet. Regardless, her decisiveness and moment of self-empowerment is emphasised by the framing of the scene, where her face takes up the majority of the shot, and she stares seriously into the middle distance.
To conclude, I wish popular fanon would stop mischaracterising these two, and flattening them into tropes and stereotypes (ie. masculine badass swordsman Mizu and feminine alluring queen but also girly swooning damsel Akemi), all of which just seems... reductive. It also irks me when Akemi is merely upheld as a love interest and romantic device for Mizu and nothing more, when she is literally Mizu's narrative foil (takes far more narrative precedence over romantic interest) and the deuteragonist of this show. She is her own person. That is literally the theme of her entire character and arc.
#blue eye samurai#mizu blue eye samurai#akemi blue eye samurai#blue eye samurai meta#just in case... im gonna tag this as#mizukemicritical#akemizucritical#though this post isnt actually criticising the ship itself but rather fanon's portrayal of the ship and the characters#for that reason lemme also tag this as#wank.mp3#feel free to disagree of course but please be civil#and if you need to rant about how wrong i am without any convincing evidence kindly feel free to make your own post. peace and love <3#fandom.rtf#meta dissertations.pdf#shut up haydar#edit: for full disclosure. i do rather dislike this ship. but obviously it's fine for anyone to enjoy it. please do! have your fun!#it's just that as usual! popular fanon and fandom around a ship is what has completely deterred me from any sense of enjoyment of it#it's a shame too because i was very open and even eager for some mizu/akemi romance in the future#but out-of-character fanon + the rudeness of certain fans has definitely soured it for me#but that doesn't mean people can't enjoy it obviously! ship and let ship!!!#plus it has its appeal which i DO STILL see and enjoy!!!!#i would even go as far as to call them soulmates because their narratives and characters are LITERALLY intertwined!!!#but. yeah. my gradual distaste for this ship is indeed very unfortunate.
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3 flavors of cherry blossom hair kotone like that one concept art
#atlus#atlus games#persona 3#p3p#kotone shiomi#p3 femc#i tried a bit of a different thing with the art style on that third one#soejima-san's art style is very inspiring...#kotone my beloved... i care her very very very much#i wish atlus would do more with her. theo is languishing over there#his guest mostly doesn't exist. so rude#other teka art
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Two skeletons in a trench lab coat (Patreon)
Bonus:
He’s very careful! Everything was fine before you interrupted!
#Doodles#Handplates#UT#FJdlsafjdsf Handplates fuzzes my brain#I cannot tell you how weird it feels to draw Gaster with the Lost Soul head after all this time away haha#It drops me back into the person I was when I first read Handplates - for better or for worse. It's a very strange feeling#Even drawing Sans and Papyrus again sends me back! Not as strongly but certain little details stand out#Sans' eyes especially... Very strange feeling#Anyhow! Since Fellplates sent me back down the rabbit hole and I've gotten back into rereading lightly - still not a full commitment!#Maybe soon tho 👀 I feel like I always say that haha#But in the meantime thinking of the pre-Plates Handplates time period <3 Since that's the one I'm still most familiar with haha#I love when they're still growing and learning ♪ Scaffolded baby talk! Twin language! Love 'em ♥#And fearless* mischievous little troublemakers hehe#They're so cute <3 I love the little ways they interact as young'uns - like when Papyrus will just lift Sans by his arms lol#I'd been thinking about and then had to go read the one of Sans as a the blanket/coat tickle monster and then - this ✨#''Excuse me sir I'd like One Ticket to the R Rated movie I am an adult Monster'' lol#Probably another one of those moments where Gaster is just *nervously sweats in Dad* lol - stop being so cute!#Also there's no particular meaning to when I use WingDings for his text :P Just convenience and if I remember to lol#Comics where he talks a lot are not convenient XP I have enough trouble editing on this paper ugh I will Not miss it when it's done#Even attempted this comic in as few pencil strokes/erasing as possible and it was still a pain to work with! >:0 Rude#Doubly so that I've had a Handplates comic idea for past like - year lol - and /this/ was the first one I finished pfftbl#To be fair to the other I do want to at least attempt making it a look-alike hehe ♪ You know how it is with Ideas™#I can't be too mad about it haha ♫ It did turn out quite cute after all :3
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This has been something that's been living in my mind for a very long time. Sometimes, when things are hard, I write this in my head and it helps, so I thought I'd share. There's a bit of hurt before it goes to the comfort, but the comfort is there, I promise. This got long so you can read it on ao3 too
cw: non-sexual bathing, depression and a whole bunch of self-hatred
Daniel doesn't hear the door opening, but one minute he's alone, curled up under the blankets, and the next Max is sitting on the edge of the bed, running clothes still on. To be fair, Max might have been there for longer than one minute. Daniel hasn't been great at keeping up with time lately, keeps losing hours to naps and blank stares at walls. He's not been great at noticing Max either, sometimes feeling like he's living alone, even when Max is right beside him.
"Daniel."
Daniel opens his eyes again, hadn't even noticed he had closed them in the first place. Max sounds tired, careful, as he often does lately. It makes Daniel want to curl up tighter, shut him out harder, embarrassed and ashamed of being like this.
"Daniel, hey."
Did he close his eyes again? Max has one hand hovering near Daniel's cheek now, but he isn't touching. The last time Max had touched him without asking first when Daniel had been like this, just a hand on his shoulder, Daniel had flinched so hard he had kicked him off the bed.
Max has been sleeping in the guest room since, and the bed feels big and cold every night. Daniel is still glad Max is not touching him.
"Daniel."
Max's voice is firmer now, a frown on his face. It used to make Daniel feel worse, knowing he was upsetting him, but it's been a reality for so long he has learned to accept he's just made to make Max feel worse.
"Your therapist appointment is in two hours, Daniel, you should get up."
This time, Daniel makes the conscious decision to close his eyes. It doesn't matter how many hours he's been spending in this bed lately, he is always exhausted, and getting up sounds like way too much work. He doesn't want to get out of his blankets, doesn't want to have to sit up, to have to speak, to have to sit in their office to talk about his fucked up brain to a lady through a screen.
For a long moment, nobody says anything. Daniel is expecting Max to argue with him, to tell him he's being childish, pathetic, but Max doesn't.
It's worse when he simply sighs and gets up, leaving the room. It makes the chasm in Daniel's chest grow new teeth, gnawing at his lungs, breath stuttering in his throat. He didn't know he could feel more lonely.
He doesn't know what to do with this, with all the slick tar coating his insides, suddenly threatening to spill out, so he does what he's been doing lately and turns around, back to the bedroom door, and wills himself to sleep.
"Daniel."
Max's voice drags him out of the fog. He doesn't know how long it's been, but when he forces himself to open his eyes again, Max is crouching next to the bed, this other side now, still in his running clothes. Not long, then.
"I ran us a bath, will you come with me?" he asks. He doesn't look mad at Daniel for not speaking, doesn't look upset. He looks worried, and pleading. There are black shadows under his eyes. It's worse than him being angry.
It takes a long moment for Daniel to actually process the words, to filter them through the fog, but Max waits patiently. He always waits for Daniel, even when Daniel doesn't deserve it.
He doesn't want to get up, doesn't want to drag his limbs to motion, but he knows he stinks, knows his hair are a greasy mess, flattened on top of his head. He should. He doesn't want to.
"Please."
It's only a whisper, but it's impossible to miss in the quiet room. It pierces through Daniel's heart, his next breath coming out harsh and choked, his eyes closing on instinct. Even when he's deep in his own pain he can't forget how this is hurting Max too, but it's worse to see it so plainly, to hear the desperation in his voice. He doesn't know why Max hasn't left yet.
"You won't have to do anything," Max continues his pleading, more urgent now, "I will carry you, I will wash you, you just have to give me permission to touch you."
There was a time, before everything got this bad, when they were all over each other all the time, constantly touching, kissing, fucking. Now, Daniel can't remember the last time he even had wanted to come and his boyfriend is asking for permission to take care of him. He feels sick.
He hates the idea of Max seeing him like this, dirty and too skinny, but Max has never been good at letting things go and he doesn't have the energy to argue with him, nor the heart to hear his pleading, so he nods.
Relief shows so plainly on Max's face it's almost a physical blow.
He's still hesitant as he grabs Daniel's shoulder, helping him sit up, holding him still until the dizziness wanes, gently easing the t-shirt he's been sleeping in off. Daniel is gearing himself up to stand up when Max leans in closer, guiding Daniel's arms around his shoulder and his legs around his waist. It's not until his hands are under Daniel's thigh and he's heaving himself up that Daniel processes what is happening. A surprised gasp leaves his mouth, but Max only shushes him softly, walking towards the bathroom.
"I won't let you fall," he reassures, as if Daniel could ever be scared of that. As if Daniel had ever not been safe when in his hands.
In the bathroom, Max puts him down on the closed toilet seat. The lights are off and the curtains are drawn, but it's still much lighter than the bedroom, making Daniel squint his eyes almost all the way closed. The bath is full, the sweet smell of his favorite body wash already filling the room. There is an unlit candle on the edge of the tub, and it tugs on Daniel's heart, how deeply Max knows him, how he was aware that Daniel likes to have candles when he's in the bath, but doesn't like smells mixing when he's already so overwhelmed. How he left Daniel the unspoken option without pressuring him to take a decision with a direct question.
"Daniel." Max waits until Daniel is looking back at him before touching his shoulder, fingers warm on Daniel's clammy skin. "Is it okay if I come in with you?"
Daniel had thought it was implied, when Max had said he had ran them a bath, wonders if Max has changed his mind, now that Daniel is almost fully naked in front of him.
Some of his thoughts, who knows how much, he hasn't had control of his face in so long, must show, because Max frowns, other hand coming up to cradle Daniel's cheek.
"Daniel, I want to, but I don't want you to be uncomfortable. Can you please tell me? What is best?"
What is best? The best would be to go back four years and tell his old self to make different decisions. Go back two years and tell Max to make different decisions. Go back ten minutes and tell himself to fall back to sleep for a long long time.
He doesn't know how to answer an open question, one that requires more than a yes or no. He nods anyway.
"Yes, I can?" Max clarifies. Daniel doesn't understand why he looks so happy about it, but he nods again, and Max smiles, the lovely crinkly one that makes his cheek bunch up. It's a stab in his chest, realising how much he had been missing it, how long it had been since he had last seen it.
Max is efficient with his own clothes, stripping off and throwing them on the floor, but he's careful with Daniel, pulling him up and gently easing his underwear off, one leg at a time. Daniel finds himself looking at the wall over Max's back, refusing to look down at his own body, refusing to think about another time, when Max on his knees in front of him would have meant something completely different.
He lets Max help him into the bath too, water deliciously hot, scooting forward to let Max sit behind him.
For a second, the inch of space between them feels like a wall. Then Max sneaks a arm around his waist, pulling him against his chest, legs bracketing him.
Daniel lets himself go boneless, knowing Max will keep him upright.
He doesn't know how long they just stay like that, lost in the warmth of the water and the steady movement of Max's chest, but after a while he feels him shift behind him, reaching for something.
"I will wash your hair now, okay?"
Daniel nods, following Max's guidance to reposition himself slightly so that he has easier access to his hair, but keeps his eyes closed, brain for once blissfully quiet.
He doesn't know what he was expecting, but for sure not the smell of his favorite shampoo to fill his nostrils, aware that he had ran out weeks prior and hadn't bothered to buy more, using Max's 2in1 instead, uncaring of how frizzy it made his curls. He doesn't know when Max went to buy more, but it's yet another squeeze to his heart.
Max is slow with it, massaging Daniel's head, his firm and gentle fingers moving down towards his neck and shoulders too, working his tension away.
He holds a hand over Daniel's forehead when rinsing him, like Michelle does with the kids, and maybe once Daniel would have argued against the babying, but not now, not when he feels so deeply cared for.
He's not expecting to hear the click of another bottle opening, wasn't aware Max even knew of the existence of conditioner. He must make a sound, because he feels Max's chest move under him, as if Max is leaning forward to check his face.
"Okay?" he asks, fingers pausing in his hair.
Daniel hums, more sound than he's produced in hours, and it feels like a reward when Max presses a kiss on his wet shoulder.
"I called Vic, before," Max starts talking, hesitant and almost embarrassed, fingers twisting in Daniel's hair. Daniel doesn't know where this is going, but it's nice, to listen to Max's voice, his chest vibrating with it against his back, feeling closer than they had in weeks.
"I wanted to know, I..." Max huffs out half a laugh, self deprecating in a way he usually isn't. "I sent her pictures, of your hair things. I don't know why you have so many, but of course she knew, and..."
Daniel twists around, Max's fingers slipping from his hair, suddenly overcome with too much emotion to be able to deal with it like this. He bangs his knee against the side of the tub, his tense shoulders twinging with pain at the uncomfortable position, and he barely gets a glimpse of Max's spooked expression before he's burying his face in his shoulder, kissing the warm skin there.
He feels Max move, giving him more space to turn around, hands rubbing his back.
"I'm sorry," Max throws out in a rush, voice tense, and Daniel doesn't know what he's apologizing for, not when he's been so wonderful all this time. "I don't know, I..."
Max's voice breaks in sync with Daniel's heart.
"What have I done wrong?" Max begs, both keeping Daniel against him and pulling back, trying to look at him. "Daniel, please, if I..."
Daniel shakes his head grabbing at him to keep him close.
"No, it's good, you..." his voice is raspy from disuse and he can feel Max flinch in surprise when he hears it, but he pushes through, for once, unable to stand Max thinking he's done something wrong. "Thank you."
Tension bleeds out of Max's body as he cradles him close again, lips finding Daniel's hair, uncaring of the conditioner still there.
"I want," Max pauses, breathing out heavily, almost a sigh. "If I can do something to make you feel better, always I want to do it."
It splits Daniel's heart wide open, the candid way Max is able to say things like this, the steadiness with which he's never stopped caring for him, not even back when they weren't together, when they weren't even talking. He hopes Max can't feel the tear he can't stop on his already damp skin.
They breathe together for a long minute, while Daniel tries once again to process the impossibility of Max's love and Max holds him close, but it still feels too soon when his back starts screaming in protest, forcing him to turn back around.
They settle back in the previous position, but it feels like something dislodged in Daniel's chest. He feels lighter and more anchored at the same time, feels like Max's hands on his body are more real, like the fog in his brain has dispersed a little.
After rinsing the conditioner, careful hand still shielding Daniel's eyes, Max moves onto an hair mask.
"Vic said, of course she does not have your hair, but Vic said this was last," he explains, coiling Daniel's curls around his fingers, one by one, focused on the task as he would be on following the perfect racing line. "She said to do this, to make them right."
Daniel tries to imagine it, Max in the living room, or maybe on his run, or in the supermarket, calling his sister for advice on hair care. He knows he talks to his family most days, but it's different, to know he talks about him, about doing something to make Daniel feel good. A spike of shame curses through him, knowing that it means at least Victoria is aware of how much of a shitty boyfriend he's been lately, but for once it doesn't stay, quickly replaced by overwhelming affection. For Max, for asking, and for Victoria, for giving such careful and detailed instructions, clearly invested in making sure Max could do his best.
The water is cooling down by the time Max rinses off the hair mask and presses another kiss on Daniel's shoulder, arms wrapping around his waist once again.
"We can get out, or I can add hot water," he offers, lips brushing against Daniel's skin. Daniel almost asks him to stay, wanting to prolong the time spent in this little bubble of comfort, but their fingers are wrinkly and he knows his therapist appointment will be soon. He had thought about skipping it, earlier, just hide in bed and refuse to talk, but now that his brain is clearer he knows it would just make things harder.
When he moves, Max moves with him, keeping him steady as they both stand up, holding his hip as he rinses him with the shower head, knowing that Daniel doesn't like to just get out of the bath, even without him having to ask, taking his hand as they step out of the tub, offering him a towel.
Daniel doesn't fight when Max starts drying him, or when he squeezes the water out of his hair with another towel, or when he goes to the bedroom and comes back with clean clothes. He lets himself be taken care of, for once enjoying again being the center of Max's full attention.
It's only when Max steps back that Daniel notices how the hoodie Max is wearing is one of Daniel's, and it reminds him all over again how he's not the only one suffering from all the shit his brain is putting him through.
It makes his heart hurt, but at the same time he can't help but feel yet another wave of love for his boyfriend, who hasn't complained, hasn't left, has never made him feel guilty for any of this. His boyfriend, who so obviously misses him, enough to wear clothes that are too warm for him.
"Come here."
Max's head snaps up, surprise clear on his face, but when Daniel opens his arms he goes willingly, folding into himself a little to be able to fit against Daniel's chest.
"I love you," Max whispers it like a secret, hiding it in the folds of Daniel's sweater, and it makes Daniel wish he could fix his brain quickly, once and for all, just to not have to hear him so small ever again.
"I love you too."
He presses one kiss on Max's hair, then another.
He knows that when they'll break the hug, Max will probably try to convince him to have some food, then will sit in the living room pretending he isn't waiting for Daniel to be done with his session. He will try to make Daniel talk about it, go outside, eat dinner, brush his teeth, take his meds. He will be there, and stay there, even when Daniel kicks him to the guest room because he can't stand the touch of another human being, even when Daniel won't speak to him for hours and hours, too lost in his own head.
Daniel wants to say thank you, but it feels like there's so much he has to be thankful for, two little words wouldn't be enough. He hopes Max gets it anyway.
#maxiel#my writing#i got very stuck at the end so excuse me if it sucks#also i dont want my ao3 to be perceived <3#but i don't like reading things longer than 2k on tumblr so it would have felt rude to post it only here#i don't even know what to add just. idk be nice to me.#feeling weirdly a lot more anxious about posting this than usual#but whatever godspeed my child i set you free
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[Narrator: Phineas plays anxiously with the bead of caenum on his abacus]
#midst podcast#phineas thatch#midst#never drawing armor again in my entire life (says every artist ever)#anyway. this is him pre Imago#hes described very often as fidgeting with his caenum bead#very rude of jonas to take it off him without providing a replacement to fidget with when he gets worried </3#also dont get on me about the facial scruff because 1. hes been away from a razor for a while#and given how fast he grew a full ass beard by Foundations i imagine he grows facial hair quite rapidly#and 2. i love drawing facial hair. if a man has facial hair i will draw him <3#artposting
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Wyll has a slightly notched ear lobe. It could easily be a battle wound, but I choose to believe he had earrings once upon a time. It looks like a rather wide wound given the area. Did...did a monster tear out one of his earrings?
Deep fried for clarity under the cut. Sorry I noticed this in a mind flayer colony and not somewhere with better lighting. I'll try and get better pictures soon.
#bg3#baldur's gate 3#wyll ravengard#I'm perfectly normal about wyll and I didn't spend 10 minutes making him kiss astarion over and over till i noticed this#it's rude you'd suggest i'm anything BUT normal#blade of frontiers#IN MY DEFENCE I SIT VERY CLOSE TO MY SCREEN
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soooo the thing is <3 i did find and also start a rowena portrait, BUT ! then i found a photo of rachel miner with ruth connell. and you know how i've been having endless rowena & meg. megena. roweg. thoughts as of late......
#i'm unfortunately very ill with about 4 different infections atm#including that god damn skin abscess from februrary that has returned in a way so rude and unbecoming 👎👎#so whatever i'm doing it's on pause#but i might attempt a little meg & rowena treat when i'm less. indisposed#that's very exciting 2 me!!!!!!#with wheelchair user meg as well bc i could launch into my disability spiel right here and now but i'll withhold<3
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i did it. i drew edgy Mikey. my sacred duty as a MCR listener is complete <3
[see the OG edit and post link below!]
behold, the OG post and the edit link: X
gives immaculate chaotic vibes, he had to be drawn
#you know i had to do it to 'em#this is everything 13 year old me would have wanted#do it for them <3#this mikey would gleefully set things on fire with his mystic weapon for the hell of it#and honestly?? im here for it#yes mikey...embrace your inner dr rude#somehow i can only imagine him giggling or cackling when he laughs no in between#anyway hello tag readers i appreciate you very much#ALSO in reference to an earlier reblog: YES watson and crick were ALSO HACKS BOO HISS#anyway <3#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise of the tmnt#rottmnt fanart#my art#explodingstar art#rottmnt mikey#tmnt#rise mikey#rise michaelangelo#does this count as an AU technically???#fuck it /pos#edgy turtles AU
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i was tagged by @wildelydawn in this tag game to get to know people better!
Ty for the tag <3
Last song:
Family Tree - Ethel Cain
Fav color: Foresty greens, deep purples and warm yellows
Last book: I just started re-reading PJO The Lightening Thief, and also Idylls of the King by Tennyson
Last movie: I was recently properly introduced to The Spice Girls.
Last TV show: Bad Buddy and also Killing Eve
Edit: actually it was literally Bleach. I just watched the latest dp like 2hrs ago T-T
Sweet/spicy/savoury: Savory all the way
Relationship status: Single and ready to mingle
Last thing I googled: "Zelda clock town clock"
Looking forward to: The weekend (it's Monday, help)
Tagging: @mortimerlatrice, @colourme-feral, @everybody-hit-the-pyro-cue
#dawn already tagged so many people i'd have tagged how rude#blah#my friend was very excited to introduce me. a fellow queer. to the spice girls when he learnt i barely knew 3 of them and wannabe lol#the movie is amazing it was absolutely not what i was expecting#10/10 would recomend
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RealAgeAU Drabble - Mud
Hello! I am back with the baby-AU! Lmao! @spotaus
I am excited about this one :3
First Drabble Prev Drabble Next Drabble
Lets just get right into it shall we? :3
*-------------------*
Nightmare should probably be paying attention.
But the truth is it has already been a long day and he just doesn't feel like it.
Instead he just keeps holding Cross's hand as he eats his chocolate bar.
Nightmare is actually standing on the ground today, which is nice for a chance. It is mostly because he just spend the last two hours or so sitting still for some doctors and healers. For his monthly check up.
Which is new to him! Since when does he have a monthly check up?!
Nightmare huffs as he keeps eating his candy bar. It is sweet and he likes that. much like the light rain that is around them. He also likes the rain.
Cross shoots him an apologetic look "I know Nightmare. We will go home soon."
Nightmare hums and leans against Cross's side. He wants to go home already. The town is nice but busy today. Something to do with it being near halloween Crop had explained.
Nightmare looks up and sees that Killer is also very done with the conversation, even if he still has a smile on his face. Cross is better with acting interested. Gerson is talking to them so Nightmare can understand why they are still humouring this whole thing.
Nightmare finishes his snack and looks aorund, searching for a garbage can. He easily spots one and goes to let go of the hand.
Cross tightens his hold and looks down at him anxious "NIghtmare? Are you okay?" he gives Gerson an apologetic smile.
Nightmare rolls his eye lights and shows the obvious wrapper "Going to throw it away." duh.
Cross looks around and spots the same garbage can "I mean... okay... fast..." he slowly lets go of the hand as Gerson pulls him back to the conversation. Social guidelines nad rules keeping him captured.
Nightmare grins and walks over to the garbage can. He is careful to not slip on the wet and muddy ground. He is getting close when he spots a large mud pool and frowns at it. Annoying as he already starts to feel his spine acting up.
Seems like being carried and letting his spine relax a bit mad ehim less used to the pain... or is it because he is small now? Nightmare really doesn't know...
Still go carefully makes his way around the mud, he is wearing his new favourite sweater, the one Dust got him when they first got here, and he doesn't want to risk it getting dirty. He is already unhappy wiht it getting wet.
He gets to the garbage can and throws away the wrapper. Mission accomplished. Now to go back to Cross and Killer.
He turns around and bums into someone. Nightmare quickly takes a few steps back and slips only slightly before regaining his balance. He looks up and sees two boys.
Nightmare mutters "sorry..." he glances around and sees that Killer is already side eyeing him and his situation and he feels a bit calmer. He is fine. Killer is here.
One of the two boys huffs "How dare you! You dirtied my shoe!"
Nightmare blinks and feels confused. What does he mean? Nightmare bummed into him yeah but he didn't hit his shoe right? He looks down and sees that the shoes are covered with mud.
Nightmare frowns and rubs his arm "Sorry?" he isn't sure but also does not want trouble "Maybe it can be washed off?" he isn't sure. Some stuff is still hard to remember.
The boy huffs "Well that doesnt make it better!"
The other boy laughs "You know what would make it better?"
Nightmare realises soemthing is wrong right away and looks for an escape but one of them grabs his arm and the next thing he knows gravity pulls him down right into the mud he had been avoiding.
It hurts so bad.
His eye sockets sting both with tears and the mud. he looks down at himself and is absolutely covered. The other two laugh but it is already becoming a background noise.
His sweater is dirty...
He had tried to be careful with it and... and...
Two arms grab him and he is suddenly held close in a hug. "nightmare?! Are you okay? Is your spine okay? Are you hurt?" Cross speaks gently as he carefully removes some of the mud from Nightmare's face.
Nightmare can't explain. it is already hard to keep in the tears and now he is also ruining Cross's clothes and his body hurts and-
He sobs. He can't keep it in. He ruined his sweater. he ruined Cross's stuff. everything hurts. it is cold. he wants to go home.
Cross just pulls him closer and rubs his shoulders gently "Oh it is okay. Don't worry okay? We will get home and get all cleaned up and we will check your injuries."
Cross's voice helps him focus. Helps him breath and get passed the sobs and tears. his face is still all wet and muddy and he is dirty and his sweater. it had been a gift! He should know better than think he is allowed to have nice things.
Someone screeches "What do you think you are doing to my dareling boys?!"
Nightmare flinches and pushes closer to Cross. he dares to glance up and sees Killer growling and glaring at the two boys. He is holding one arm of one of the boys, the one Ngihtmare run into, behind his back and Nightmare knows that angle is painful.
Killer glances at the lady before looking back at the boy near tears "Teaching your child manners about how he shouldn't bully or harm a young child." Killer's voice is compeltely calm. Giving nothing away. Nightmare knows it means he is beyond furious.
The lady glares "It are just boys! Boys will be boys!" she huffs "What did they even do?" she notices him and huffs again "It is just mud! It is harmless!"
Killer looks at her before grinning. He lets go of the child and steps back. He moves quickly and Nightmare isn't even sure how he does it but next thing there is a wave of mud which covers all three.
Killer crosses his arms and waits.
The lady screeches again "How dare you?! This is real fur!"
Killer raies a brow "What? I thought you just told me. It. Is. Just. Mud." he stares her down "All you will have to do? Clean it. Which is much easier for you. As you have one of those handie bodies to keep it out of your system. Unlike wiht us skeletons that can cause quite a bit of different injuries. All caused by dirt getting stuck in joints. You know, like mud. And between joints, that this babybones has."
The lady shakes slightly as she looks around before looking back at Killer.
Killer stares at her "I will make this clear. YOu are going to walk away with those two brats of yours. You are not going to cause us anymore issues. understood?"
The lady nods and grabs her two boys and leaves.
Killer huffs before looking back at him. cold and emotionless look gone as he looks at him "tiny boss?"
Nightmare knows he is still crying as he pulls on his sweater a tiny bit. it sticks to his body, it rubs and hurts everything... but his sweater. He looks at Killer and isnt sure how to explain "my sweater..." he knows he is still crying "Dusty got this for me...." it was so expensive and special and Nightmare tried to be careful with it but he wanted the warm hug of the sweater at his appointment because it was Dust's relax day but now it is dirty and ruined and and and.
He can't explain adn just sobs.
Cross seems to understand as he pulls him closer "oh baby it is okay. We are going home. get you all cleaned up and clean up your sweater too. You will be wearing it again before you know it!"
Nightmare just sobs again.
Cross nuzzles him gently and that makes him feel a bit better.
"Hey tiny boss! Look!"
Nightmar eblinks and looks over at Killer. Killer sees him look and he grins widely. Before kicking his own feet out from under him and faceplanting right into the mud that Nightmare fell into.
Cross gasps "Killer!"
Killer pulls his face out and grins widely. The mud and tears mix and it is messy and he is covered in mud but it falls in almost slowmotion and-
Nightmare can't stop the giggle leaving him.
Killer grins and gets up. Each step makes a weird slurp and slosh. Nightmare snorts and laughs more.
Killer gets to them and grins at him.
Cross looks amused himself "You are a mess." he still nuzzles nightmare.
Killer grins and winks at Nightmare "Just means tiny boss and I will both need a bath." He then stands straight and shows his outfit "And look! More clothes that need washing! We will just wash our stuff together!"
Nightmare giggles and nods before starting to reach for Killer. He still pulls his hand back again. It feels... needy...
Killer grins as he sloshes over and nuzzles his face all over.
Cross sighs "Killer you are getting your goop all over him."
Killer grins at Cross "It is fine crossy! When we get home it is bathtime anyway!"
Nightmare feels himself relax a bit more as Killer rubs the tears away and Nightmare leans back against Cross. They are going home and wash up together.
He really hopes the sweater will turn out to be okay but the others probably know how to wash it out carefully.
*-------------------*
First Drabble Prev Drabble Next Drabble
#Realageau#utmv#nightmare sans#deaged nightmare#cross sans#killer sans#We had a drabble from baby's view!!#Sadly there are always rude people who are mean just to be mean because it makes them feel better about themselves#luckily neither cross or killer accept ANY of that!#Sadly baby is now covered in mud and sad and cold and hurt#but he will get bath time and some relaxing with dusty before going to cuddle and nap with his giant bat plushie (name still pending)#and look at killer rolling a nat 20 on intimidation with his 20 in charisma and making the rude people... actually listen and leave?#Huh. Very impressive... :3#Also still slightly exploring the right tune for Nightmare#He is a baby obviously but he is also very smart and has seen and done many things#it affects how he thinks about things which words he uses how he thinks about himself EVERYTHING#But at the same time child instincts are coming back HARD because he has four very willing caretakers who aren't accepting anything but#Nightmare being a happy and content child. There is some issues he is working through
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Hullo to my fellow fandom creators.
How you guys doing? Good? Good.
I just wanted to drop you a little note to say I hope you’re all having fun out here. Because fun is what it’s all about, right? Fun and excitement and hobbies and interests and all that good stuff!
While I’ve been wandering about in my little corner here at tumblr dot com, I gotta tell you, it can be so easy to get discouraged sometimes. Like SO easy. And I dunno folks, I guess I just wanted to remind you (and me!) that when we create stuff for our fandoms, it’s for fun! Because we love it! Because we love making it! We love sharing it! We love the source material and the characters and the world-building and all that other neat stuff!
Sometimes we all need a little reminder, I find. Because sometimes people don’t like what we’re making. Sometimes they’ll be rude or complain and make demands about how fandom "cOnTeNt” (yuck) should be made (double yuck) and act kind of entitled about it. And idk, that gets kind of disheartening. Especially when you’re pouring all your heart and soul into what you’re making, simply for the love of it.
So! Yeah I just wanted to check in with you folks because I’m seeing a lot of that weird entitlement in various fandoms lately, and from one creator to another, I wanted to just say -if I may wax poetic for a moment here- nuts to those people. Nuts to ‘em. NUTS, I TELL YOU.
Not everyone is going to like the stuff you make, and that's okay. The important thing is to remember that their opinions have nothing to do with you or me or anyone else making art or fics or edits or whatever our little hearts desire. Just because what you're making doesn't tick someone else's personal boxes doesn't mean that what you're making is wrong or bad!
If people want specific stuff in fandom, they can make it. If they don’t like what we’re making, they can move on - that's fine. If they want to publicly whine about it and try to make it everyone else's problem, that's their baggage and we don't have to take any of that on board. It’s no reflection on you if someone wants to demand that their own specific tastes be met, rather than actually taking part in the community in a positive way. Because we’re here for fun, aren’t we.
Are you having fun? Good. That’s all that matters.
Go make something cool and fun, and have a great day!
Love you!
#just to be clear this isn’t about any one specific thing or person or even anything that's happened to me#just seeing a lot of v. demanding posts aimed at fandom creators lately and while I get that everyone has different taste and that's fine#there's something to be said for tact and delivery and just generally not being rude about it#anyway. sorry to rant but I woke up and saw 3 posts like that first thing this morning - in varying fandoms#one of them was a fandom I have literally nothing to do with#but it got blazed and I saw that negative whining on my dash like 74 times before I just gave up and blocked the OP#and it just got my goat!#I’m just doing that big-sister-cracking-her-knuckles-in-the-background thing right now#because I feel very protective of fandom creators#so I just wanted to say something because you guys are AMAZING and it's important to me personally that you all know that#fandom#fandom wank#on fandom
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4am posting of pirate au fornax's handsome face before i scramble off to bed
#fornax#au roe#pirate au#chefs kiss to the shaders that make her eyes/markings pop and don't wash out their skin#i didn't see her all day/night until like 3 hours ago and i was wailing for my butch fix. my daily serotonin#i have 2 poses in an ask scheduled for later and then i gotta do another (it's the size difference stuff tehe)#fun fact she's VERY mean and nasty in this au. rude mf. do not look at them. perceive at your own risk. they maim and bite on sight
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hey!! can i ask for a color palatte description for the ro's? like what their hair/eye colors are?
hope you're having a good week 💙💙💙
Hi!
I spent a long time putting together a graphic for this before I realised that you asked for just a description haha... oops. well. here is the graphic anyway XD
If you're looking for a link to the page with more general descriptions, there are some on the RO's page.
Very sorry for the delay in replying! My life is. hectic. smdnfgbsfgf
#what does the chaos mirror see#twyliit#if you want to use these i'd recommend zooming in because some of them have detailing but unfortunately tumblr seems to have destroyed it#or at least hidden some of it in ensmallening#it was very difficult to find a shining silvery enough colour for suchebh's hair and eyes#and i regret i could not find an eye colour for twilit that captured the necessary distressing pastel neon toothpaste vibe i was seeking#i am not an artiste i'm afraid. i wish i could do proper ones of these with. undertones as such#but alas#also just rambling in the tags here for a bit but. i got an ask this morning accusing the game of being a scam#because it hasn't updated for ages#and like bro. scam... it's not like i took preorders msnbgsmdnfgb. i have to Laugh#once again deeply sorry to the small number of people concerned with how much my homelessness was an inconvenience For Them<3#finally got my life somewhat back on track after months of teetering on the edge of the abyss (rude of me not to spend it all writing)#but in service of getting my life back on track i'm studying. so that i can get a job later and continue to survive. again. Selfish. oops#and then my beloved cat died. and there just. isn't anything to keep going for anymore LMAO#but alas. so long as the music plays. we dance#and this game is part of the dancing for me. i guess. i still work on things when i have the time#hopefully you'll recover from my terrible circumstances<3
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People who are newer to FromSoft games tend to think that the best way to be rude to someone you just fought is to teabag them, but this is incorrect. If you teabag me I will simply think "ah what an immature dick" and move on.
However, if you do the gesture where you point down at the ground after fighting me, I will consider it a horrendous slight against my entire being and all I hold dear, and will simmer with rage while praying for your swift demise for the rest of the day. It's truly the most powerful and grievous of insults, and will make any player who's in the know fucking hate you.
Essentially, the teabagging is a "haha gottem" which is easy to brush off, while the point down is a firm "you suck at this game" and needless to say, it hits different.
#nothing wrong with being new but it is very clear when players in elden ring#bcs they are not privy to the unspoken etiquette that has been a staple of the community from the beginning#teabaging is rude but pointing down?? that's the real dick move#that's how you REALLY make it hurt#elden ring#dark souls#soulsborne#fromsoft#all you need to know is 1) don't heal during a pvp fight#2) waving your shield means 'let's fight'#and 3) pointing down mean 'you're bad at this' which is meaner than anything else you could do or say
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An assortment of Mechi and Kwahu doodles I did while sitting through the World's Most Boring Video Conference™ at work today. You can tell I'm very good at paying attention and staying on-task.
#gracie plays#rimworld bloopers#A Mechanitor's Message#art#my art#traditional art#rimworld art#unpolished art#gracie is drawing when she should be working#but doodling was the only thing keeping me awake#I don't know how I feel about the Jones boys with short hair#it upsets me but they're still cute so eh#I'm sad that Kwahu never got to be a cute little kid#spawned into the world as an almost-30-year-old man#poor guy#Mechi is very rude but I love him#have an awesome day! Hopefully it's less boring than mine was <3 <3 <3
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