#very long post but i didn't want to make 3 different posts for this oops

[svibian]

231231 | Xiao Zhan Studio Weibo

[malevolentmango]

meta thoughts on Loki's role in What You've Already Buried

Yes, this is a meta post about my own fic. idk how I got here but I do in fact have a lot of thoughts about Loki and how I chose to combine the p5r persona, the actual mythology of Loki, and Goro's character arc, so here we are.

If you haven't read the whole fic and you care about spoilers, make sure to leave this for after! Also, this got... really long and sort of all over the place. I tried to organize it all but alskdjfa oops?

So, to start, I'll go through the various stories I referenced in the fic. Obviously we're playing fast and loose with the mythology here in general, but stick with me.

Chapter 2

The dream in chapter 2 was the result of me mashing together two different, unrelated stories. The poem Hyndluljóð briefly references Loki eating a woman's roasted heart, and no matter how many times I told myself I didn't need to include that imagery anywhere in my fic, you can see that it ended up there anyway because it's sexy as hell. The rest of that scene, where Goro/Loki talks about his fate and how they will always end up here, is a reference to Loki's role in the death of the god Baldr, which results in Loki being bound and eventually starting Ragnarök when he breaks free. This is the first real hint in the story that Loki is behind all of this - particularly when he refers to Akira as "the bleeding god," which is an epithet for Baldr.

Fun fact about the dream sequences, actually: originally there were only two, the very vague one in chapter 1 and the binding in chapter 3. As I was editing chapter 2, I realized that I wanted to start building up to the eventual reveal of Loki's involvement much earlier than I had while writing (and in fact, when I first started writing this, I hadn't even decided who or what created the app - I just wanted to get the concept down, and it all kind of snowballed from there).

From there though, I picked up a bit of a theme, and a progression. The dreams were meant to parallel certain scenes we get in Goro's confidant route - things like him joking about taking Akira out at the arcade, and the game of billiards that's one big metaphor about Goro's subterfuge. They act as warnings, and in the case of the dreams, rather direct ones: Goro is literally eating Akira's heart. Goro is the one who wanted to kill him, and therefore Loki, as a part of his heart, is a danger to Akira. But Akira never takes them as warnings. What he sees are cries for help, a cycle that Goro can't break out of on his own.

The parallels between Goro and Loki are pretty blatant in this one. Talking about his lies, the people he's killed, how "I can be no other than what I am." That line is actually a reference to the song No More What Ifs, which plays in Jazz Jin: "I do not / regret with my choices I'm rather proud / ooh I know I won't change anything / because I can only be me."

Chapter 3

The dream in chapter 3 was, as Goro himself explains later, the binding of Loki from the poem Lokasenna. This one is actually pretty close to the original, with the major differences being that Loki was bound with the entrails of his own son and the "poison" is actually venom dripping from a snake. I think it's neat that Loki's reaction to the venom touching him is what's thought to create earthquakes, so I wanted to include that as well.

As mentioned above, this dream was actually the first one I wrote. The idea just sort of came to me while writing and I really wanted to include it. This is why it's a bit different from the others, in that it doesn't take place anywhere that would be familiar to Akira, but rather in the Void itself. And I think the result is that it's even more pointed than the previous dream. This is Loki himself showing Akira exactly what he's getting into - that Goro, and by extension himself, comes with a whole helluva lot of baggage. That if Akira goes through with this mission, he will forever be the Sigyn who loves Loki too much to let him be hurt, and must watch him hurt anyway.

But as we know, Akira is too stubborn to let that stop him. Akira believes wholeheartedly in saving people, but especially in saving Goro Akechi. That determination is really put on display in chapter 4.

Chapter 4

The dream in chapter 4 is different in that it's not based on an actual story, but rather on the etymology of the name Loki, which is thought to originate from a Germanic root word related to loops, knots, and hooks. I'm just gonna include the direct quote from Eldar Heide that inspired this because it's pretty great: "There is quite a bit of evidence that Loki in premodern society was thought to be the causer of knots/tangles/loops, or himself a knot/tangle/loop. Hence, it is natural that Loki is the inventor of the fishnet, which consists of loops and knots, and that the word loki is a term for makers of cobwebs: spiders and the like."

It's important to note at this point, I think, that all three of these dreams take place in the story after Akira and Goro have a conversation in the previous scene about who Goro is and what he wants. In chapter 2, Akira dreams of Goro eating his heart in the interrogation room directly after Akira tells Goro what he learned in the Velvet Room and Goro tries to convince Akira that he isn't worth saving.

In chapter 3, Akira dreams of the binding of Loki after Akira tells Goro that he's worthy of Robin Hood, and then teases him about how he found Black Mask Goro, and by extension Loki, attractive. This was partially just for fun (I was imagining it a bit as Loki going "you don't have a book about me yet? well check this shit out--"), but it's also another moment of Akira reaffirming that he wants Goro around.

So chapter 4, then, takes place the same night that Akira sends the thirst trap pic of himself to Goro, and Goro responds with a last ditch attempt at intimidation - trying to insist that even if Akira cares about him, he won't be able to handle the depth of Goro's feelings for him, because they're too much. He's too selfish, too possessive. Unfortunately for him, Akira is into that.

And this dream thus breaks the pattern. The previous ones were about things happening to Akira - he couldn't even speak in them. He was a bystander, a victim. In this one, he is literally bound, a treat all tied up for Goro/Loki to enjoy. The more Akira tries to escape, the more Goro/Loki breaks down, talking about how he can't let Akira go, that everyone leaves him. And when Akira does escape and goes directly to Goro/Loki instead of leaving, he delivers on the promise he didn't even realize he was making two chapters ago: that he will pull Goro out of the cycle and set him free too.

Chapter 5

The PTs genderbending and being chased through a forest came from the Gylfaginning book of the Prose Edda, which details how Loki turned into a mare in order to lure a builder's stallion away from his work and thus cheat him out of his payment from the Æsir. This encounter results in Loki later giving birth to the horse Sleipnir.

Utgard-Loki

From the same book comes the story of Utgard-Loki (technically written Útgarða-Loki, but I chose to leave it as "Utgard" the way the Persona series does). Utgard is a giant who agreed to shelter Loki and Thor for a night in exchange for performing a feat. The reason the Thieves have to do four feats is because there are actually two children with Loki and Thor in the story, but I didn't want to get into all that here. For similar reasons, their feats are a lot more straightforward than, for example, Loki competing in an eating contest against the personification of a wildfire.

Fenrir, Sköll, and Hati

Next, in the forest, we get Fenrir and his sons Sköll and Hati. The two younger wolves are said to chase the sun and moon across the sky until the onset of Ragnarök, at which point they would be caught and swallowed. In the fic, this has already happened, as their light is visible when the wolves howl - implying that Ragnarök has already started, and the Thieves are moving closer to the final battle.

The place they lead the Thieves to, Fenrir's island, is a direct reference to the island Lyngvi (meaning "a place overgrown with heather") where the Æsir bind Fenrir with Gleipnir, as described in Gylfaginning. They do so by tricking him and questioning his courage, saying that if he truly can't break free of this simple ribbon, then he must not be a danger to them after all. In reality, Odin feared Fenrir, who the prophecies said would be the death of Odin, and the gods considered all children of Loki to be too dangerous to be free.

This is where a lot of the threads start to come together with regards to how I chose to portray Loki in this fic: as a deviant, as a trickster, as a murderer, but also as someone who (like Goro) was a victim of his role in the larger story he's part of. Ragnarök can't happen without Loki - it doesn't matter how much he aids the gods, how much he's a part of their ranks. The moment he pulls the strings of Baldr's death, he's an outcast. He is the unwanted, the persecuted, all because it's foretold that he will be. He cannot escape the cycle. No one escapes Ragnarök.

In talking about this story with a friend, I described my portrayal of Loki as being more sympathetic than a lot of other ones I've read in this fandom. I think that really comes through in this scene, even though Loki isn't in it at all. Part of that is because it's from Akira's POV and he has a massive savior complex, but really I just liked the idea of twisting the lens through which we think about Loki as a character and how we connect him to the actual stories about him.

When I was reading about Loki for this fic, the idea I kept coming back to was that he just seems... tragic. That as much as he delights in causing suffering, it comes at the cost of a deep, personal pain. Imagine having everything you've worked for, everything you've done and created, taken away from you at the whims of someone more powerful than you. A player in a game you were born to lose. That's Loki, and it is also, of course, Goro Akechi.

Loki in the Mead Hall

This piece was, of course, inspired by Lokasenna, Loki's Flyting. The Thieves hear the gods reacting angrily to Loki's insults as they approach the building, but ultimately don't understand what all that vitriol means. This was partly because there was no way in hell I was writing an actual flyting, but also because I wanted to show off a bit of Loki's power over this space. It's his realm, after all.

(Fun fact: the descriptions of the mead hall and the forest from the previous scene were loosely based on the truly batshit amount of time I spent playing Valheim.)

This encounter with Loki was actually the first thing I wrote that took place in the Void - I think it was around the same time that I wrote the dream in chapter 3. I wanted to show that Loki is someone to be feared, someone who by his very nature is crafty and powerful and terrifying... and I also wanted to show why that doesn't make him evil by more directly stating his intentions. This is the scene where the Thieves actually get an answer to why Loki is helping them and Goro - because he cares about Goro.

Which sounds like a simple answer - of course the source of Goro's persona cares about him - but it's not. One of the things that trickster figures are known for is defying expectations. The expectation for a god living separate from humans in the Void would be that they don't have particularly strong feelings for them one way or another. We see this in the previous scene when the Thieves encounter Odin, who was once Akira's persona - he acknowledges that connection, but still plans to trick them.

From the moment Loki captured Goro and then gave Akira the Crow app, he was defying his place in the cycle. Loki cannot change his own fate, but he can change theirs - that's what a trickster does. Similarly, Akira also defies expectations when he tells Loki that he wants him to be himself - Loki, who is meant to be a shapeshifter, who is meant to bring destruction by his very nature, is being told that that's okay. After all, Akira loves Goro just the way he is. Why wouldn't he do the same for Loki?

Plus, I just really wanted to make Loki sexy as hell in this scene. I mean Look At Him.

Jörmungandr

His appearance is brief and not as important as others, but there two important bits to take away from this. One, that Akira continues to empathize with Loki and his children where the Thieves are still frightened (this is more just to keep on theme). And two, that Jörmungandr is free - he's not biting his own tail and encircling the world, another sign that Ragnarök has begun.

Fimbulwinter and Ragnarök

So obviously there's a lot going on here. I wasn't pulling directly from any story here, just the general themes: Fimbulwinter is the harsh and unforgiving winter that precedes Ragnarök and puts an end to all life on Earth. Ragnarök itself is then characterized by the great battle in which many of the Æsir die, after which the world burns and is then completely submerged underwater. Only then can the world rise again and the cycle can continue.

An interesting note: While the Thieves battle Ragnarök Loki, the form that Goro's shadow takes, they never actually enter the part of this realm that is Ragnarök. They remain in Fimbulwinter because that's where Goro was being held - because Loki had to keep him far enough in to be safe, but didn't want to put him in the place where Loki himself is doomed to repeat his own death over and over again. It's another example of Loki's strange brand of kindness.

I'm actually pretty happy with how Shadow Loki turned out. The idea that Goro had to face his own shadow was one I took from P4, which a friend was streaming for me and a few others at the time I was writing this. Of course, in P4 it's about accepting a part of yourself you don't want to acknowledge or come to terms with, and that's not really the case for Goro. I think he knows exactly who he is - he's told both Yusuke and Haru outright that he doesn't regret what he's done. For him, facing his shadow is about proving that isn't all that he is - that he is more than the smiling prince and the bloodied assassin and the unwanted child.

And of course, the reason his shadow takes the form of a sort of amalgamation of Loki and his own Black Mask outfit is because Loki is the source of all that. He's the one who gave Goro the power to kill, and Goro used that power without restraint. Goro stepped willingly into the same cycle of violence that Loki has always known, and in this scene, he's finally breaking free of it.

After the fight, we finally get Loki explaining to Goro in his own words why he's done all this. It's slightly different from what he told Akira in the mead hall - to Akira, he admits that he cares for Goro, whereas to Goro himself he says he wants Goro to live because "one of us should." Both answers are correct, but I think the second one is more true to how Loki sees himself and how he sees Goro. Loki is limited by his nature as a god to never change, to always be both an agent and victim of fate, but Goro isn't. And rather than attempt to change himself using the so-called "leeway" afforded to tricksters, Loki uses that power to give Goro the life he himself can never have.

And finally, we have the moment where Goro gives the treasure he took from his shadow to Loki. As Akira learns later in the epilogue, this is a hair pin that belonged to Goro's mother, which he would use to hold a blanket in place around his shoulders when he pretended to be a hero. That he would give such an item to Loki - something he lost years ago after his mother's death, something he will never see again in reality - and thank him for lending him the power to survive as long as he did is, I think, really telling of their connection to each other. In a way, it's almost a challenge, even a threat - Goro is telling Loki not to forget him and what they stood for, no matter how many times he repeats the cycle. He's taking his own stance on the idea that Loki can never change, and that stance is "Try harder then."

And maybe he can. Or maybe he can't. One of the things that I really wanted to explore in this fic is the idea of how a persona and its user overlap with the stories that persona comes from, and Loki and Goro are a great example of this. Two characters bound by fate, doomed to die by their respective narratives. Of course they found each other. And of course Goro would never be happy with the idea of a part of his soul being controlled by outside forces. Whether or not Loki can really change, though, is up to interpretation.

In Conclusion

idk I just think he's neat. Which one of them am I talking about? Yes. If you read all of that nonsense, you're my hero.

And just for fun...

I actually did write an entire move set for Ragnarök Loki, even though it was completely unnecessary. Figured I'd include it here for anyone wondering just how tough a fight that would be!

Ragnarök Loki (2 actions/turn)

Call of Chaos - Boost self's attack but drop defense for 3 turns. Laevateinn - Colossal Physical damage to 1 foe. Megidolaon - Severe Almighty damage to all foes. Concentrate - Multiply user’s next magical attack damage by 2.5. Sigyn’s Burden - Inflict Despair (high odds) to 1 foe. Hel’s Retribution - Decrease ATK/DEF/AGI for all foes for 3 turns. Jörmungandr’s Venom - Medium chance of instantly killing all foes. Fenrir’s Hunger - Heavy Nuclear damage to 1 foe. Medium chance to inflict Hunger. Fimbulwinter - Severe Ice damage to all foes. Ragnarök - Severe Fire damage to all foes and inflict Fear (high odds)

[ceoofmetagala]

How's flora nowadays

3 awnsers since I haven't quite decided where in there current OC timeline I decided to make my official normal point so hermm... I'm leaning to 1 but 2 is funny. Look at these babies.(Valerie and audery( how can I tell them they need to wait to exist....

1. No Valerie or Audrey born yet so post fl time somewhere approximately

- very out of it.,(like they daydream and space our)

- has to be physically constrained for him to not open a portal because to their own dream realm (normally by galacta)

-clingy to galacta knight

-really dislikes meta knight and looks at him really aggressively while he's talking to galacta (pre metagala btw I imagine.,)

- it often falls asleep and forgets to eat since it never really stayed awake or ate in the dream realm to conserve energy

- if he is awake they spend most of his time outside in flower fields or tending to a garden galacta told meta knight they should really get him if they wanted flora preoccupied

- he's not quite out of their dream world mindset and believes that is reality still, it hasn't been that long since they found them after all

- surprisingly one aspect he does go against the dream world is galactas gender. You would think he'd insit he's a girl but no. Floras doesn't gaf. Flora doesn't quite understand gender and just views it as "oh galacta got a new set of clothes neat"

- oh wait yeah so Mentioned theyre clingy to galacta but he does act flirty to him as well. Much to gks dismay who 1.has always viewed flora as a sibling like friend 2.what the fuck

He's pretty nice about and flora gets extremely confused but kinda goes what the hell did I do sosmthing wrong? what did I do ???

This is a bit minupltive on floras part but like. Floras isn't in the best mindset right now

Galacta has since just "broken up" with flora who is like???? What. What did I do..no seriously what the hell did I do and galactas reason was "we're better off as friends sorry I didn't tell u sooner oops" and flora kinda just goes okay. But did I do anything wrong. What did I do.

Flora wants a clear answer but galacta is unwilling to so just leaves it at that saying flora didn't really do anything, it's just galacta doesn't like him like that anymore LOL.

So yeah now that flora and galacta have "broken up" flora is mkre quiet and less clingy to galacta. He's trying to take it well but that was a small crack in his dream realm mindset so he thought maybe something is different. Maybe something is off. Just a maybe.

2. Current present time where I imagine my OCS most often? (Valerie and audery are alive so quite a bit in the future)

- has realized dream realm is fake. Not taking it qell

- this happened a lil bit after Valerie was born.

-he was freaking out and and panicking and trying desperately to repair the fantasy

-hes failing duh and he starts to just lock themselves away for some period of time before returning, paranoid as ever

- they thinkz everything ismt real right now

- no one is really sure how to help flora. Various attempt to keep them company, flora particularly dislikes: galacta, techno, blacknoise and meta. He has made better friends with some during this but he isntits it doesn't matter since no one is real. (Better friend club; Veri(not same situation but has the most experience with coping with mental illness))

- just really uncomtble being around Valerie and Audrey when he finds out about their existence.

-is debating if finding out this dream realm was a lie was a good thing or not and is unwilling at the moment to recover what was lost(memories post galacta gets sealed) which is understandable. That's more stress!!!!

- 👍

3. Valerie and audery are teens (yes I do use Valerie and Audrey as my measuring sticks)

- finally has accepted what reality is and doing a lot better.

- currently looking for mirri.

- yeah they're doing better now. Back to pre sealing gk flora but like a more mature one ig

- not entirely happy tho since it's dealing with everything ya know.

-new issue; he avoids sleeping. Atelast he eats regularly now!

Yeah👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍 rip flora in number 2 hope you gett better soon🙏(they do get better but no too soon)

[starrcrossrose]

Omg, Idk if my previous ask got through, it just said „hello“ so if it did, ignore that please, if not…please ignore this too?? XD anywayy, as more and more pieces of the Villain Leo Au/Story are being released, I was wondering, might you share a bit about your writing process? I noticed that the Aftermath is built very differently from other fanfics since you change perspectives constantly, but you also „rewind“ a bit every time you do that. And I was wondering, when you have an idea for a story, do you immediately write prompts or do you plan out the story before you write anything and how do you do with the Aftermath and Villain Leo? Thank you in advance <3

Hello hello! I didn't get your other message so this works hehe.

As far as a writing process... it definitely differs from fic to fic and story to story. Usually I imagine a scene and that's my springboard, and that can be at any point in the story. I've even had something as simple as a song painting a vivid picture in my head and have built entire stories off of that before -- like my Project Kitsune story.

In fact, I have a LOT of stuff planned for the V!AU already but everything I've actually written is too far in the future of the plot for me to share just yet. (oops LOL)

The Aftermath was originally only supposed to be 4 chapters *wheeze*, so that one... I was already handling differently. But then it continued to form and grow into the monster (/aff) that it is now. But I still wanted to stick with the theme of diving into each character and how they were handling everything post-invasion. That means I wanted to see how they felt during the time they thought that Leo was gone, as well as how they were feeling AFTER. Also, switching POV's per chapter was pretty normal for me as a kid! It's been nice to write that way again as an adult.

Ironically, the V!Leo AU isn't much different. I watched a video that sent my brain into a "what if" spiral and it just continued to grow from there! It also pulled in some of my good friends and they have been a HUGE help and lots of fun to plan the story out with. I had some ideas but having others to brainstorm with has been extremely fun and useful. Also, one simple question changed a lot of the trajectory of certain relationships and now there are characters in this AU I never expected to put here. But it made it so much more interesting.

If there's one thing I love to do, it's to write character studies. I love world building and such in my original works too, but my favorite thing to do is write characters. If you have strong characters that make you feel a lot of things, sometimes even a weaker plot can still work.

Uhhh this is probably a longer response than you intended to get LOL. But, my writing process tends to be centered a lot around "what if's" in fanfic, and in original works, it's a lot of "what's fresh but also familiar". I also used to not make notes and now I HAVE to or I write myself into a corner. Having a spot for notes and ideas is important bc even if they change, at least you don't get lost as easily. Especially with something like the V!AU which uh... takes place over several long years.

[rriavian]

Part 2 of this post from an ask from @altair214. So. Battle tactics! I must also add a disclaimer that I’ve never read the art of war, but it fits and so I’m gonna quote it. Also this got very long, as always, and I have to admit I feel a little arrogant for writing meta about my own fic. But! Hopefully will be an interesting read <3 

I've realised that I mainly use differing combinations of three specific tactics when I write. So in terms of the accidental alignment of my writing to Dream’s comic brand of subtle manipulation we have the following:

Manipulate what your enemy views as orthodox and unorthodox behaviours. By feigning orthodox behaviour, you set your opponent up for attack through unorthodox action. Eg. Appear weak when you are strong.

I’m a fan of subversion. I like unconventional ways of approaching things. I’ve always been fascinated by how a comparatively smaller action can have a lot more weight than a larger one depending on how it’s framed.

Like one TV show might have a dozen or so sex scenes that make you yawn, but another has one person holding another’s hand and you just about die because it’s so powerful.

One of the reasons why I love Dream is because he's a character that is so often the opposite of what is expected. He’ll let someone’s assumptions of him act against them, play into them to a certain extent. It’s applicable to what vulnerability means to him too. Weirdly it’s more accurate to say that when Dream seems vulnerable it’s someone else that is actually in trouble. Prime example is him meeting with Lucifer in hell, Dream is not at all bothered by the disrespect of the exchange because he’s secure enough in himself not to be, and he’s more than willing to take advantage of the view to achieve victory.

I saw something recently about how Dream could have chosen to make himself taller in this fight, but doing so would have been akin to a kitten puffing their fur to seem more threatening.

Lucifer would have loved it.

Dream didn't need to do it here, but I think he would have if he'd gone into hell at full power and wanted to seem weak...again, that subversion I love mixed with the unorthodox/orthodox actions. The example you used of the question asked by Odin and Dream’s response is such a perfect illustration of this. Dream is not going to let someone else cheat so easily by telling them what he is.

Or giving them a hint at how they should see him.

It’s not something reserved for enemies either. He has a moment with Lucienne where she’s upset and hurt by what she sees as her work being dismissed, and it could be argued Dream leans into what contrition is expected to look like. It’s the most overt display of ‘oops’ we’ve ever really seen in Dream, his solemn mannerisms put aside for the moment. Not because he’s lying, not that he isn’t regretful that he hurt her, but because he is willing to use her view of behaviour to ensure his response translates properly. He uses that perception to make his feelings visible, to put them in the context that is most accessible to her.

You could say he does similar with Johanna when she mentions Burgess, though I don’t think he alters his behaviour here, just lets her respond to it. Then when Hob accuses him of loneliness Dream does absolutely nothing to hide how nope he is about that. And while it might seem like it breaks my theory on vulnerability because of how extreme a reaction it was, what Hob said was actually an equally extreme insult.

And Dream’s reaction to it resulted in Hob running after him, displaying his own desperate vulnerability, panicked at losing the only constant in his immortal life. Perhaps at having the gift itself revoked.

And he's lured to it because the power in that interaction very much remains with Dream.

While Hob clearly spends time ruminating over that meeting, Dream is very interestingly nonchalant the one time we see him reminded of it, in the scene when Death asks if he’s going to see Hob. There's more to say on this but I will skip to the end of my thought. I bet that if Dream hadn’t been caught by Burgess he’d have turned up to their meeting 100 years later and gotten an apology. Or skipped that meeting just to prove his point.

To secure ourselves against defeat lies in our own hands, but the opportunity of defeating the enemy is provided by the enemy himself.

Your analysis of Dream making a deal with Loki aligns with this. It seems to me that Dream used this idea in a very unorthodox way to get what he wanted, knowing Loki as he did, and predicting that he’d kidnap Daniel as a way to force Dream to waste his debt. Loki thinks he’s been given the tool to defeat Dream, thinks he’s the one acting in a way that’s unorthodox, but he’s completely misunderstood what victory even is for Dream. He doesn’t actually know what Dream wants. As Odin highlights, it’s unclear whether Dream is victim or manipulator, and this inability for anyone to really know what they are fighting and what his motives are makes Dream so difficult to attack.

In reverse Dream is astounding good at getting the measure of people and using their in character actions for his own ends without even manipulating their behaviour.

In canon he knows Rose will draw the arcana together, knows her search for her brother will lead him where he needs to go. And he's secure enough in his assessment of the threat she poses to let things continue. So in Baiting the Trap Dream uses everything he knows the Corinthian is to assure his victory, achieves it just by letting the Corinthian do his own unhinged thing. As you said, Dream knew right from the start that he was going to win.

The only way the Corinthian could have won is if he stopped being himself.

That’s how Dream fights his enemies – he tailors your defeat to be a road you will always walk. He finds your fatal flaw, your hamartia, and he makes defeat inevitable. Dream gets you to choose it. Again, bringing this back to my point about Orpheus, Dream seems to ultimately arrange this very same thing for himself. He uses his own fatal flaw, his own unavoidable prophesy, and engineers both his defeat and his rebirth.

The most effective trap is always the one you don’t see coming until it’s far too late. The one you only see at all because the victor has allowed you to know you’ve lost. But it’s also one you willingly walk into, even fight to walk into.

A large group striking a small group is not held in high esteem, but a small group striking a larger force is.

There are canon examples of this—such as Dream’s way of dealing with Rose, and his missing creations—but I’m going to focus on BTT so this doesn’t get too long. This point really explains why I’ve always presented the Corinthian’s desire to provoke an extreme reaction as a way to get Dream to show weakness. It’s also why Sweetening the Deal had to be what it is.

It’s essentially point 3 in sex form.

It isn’t strength to throw all your power around when you don’t need to. There’s no achievement, no satisfaction, to be found in defeating a far weaker opponent. It’s why Dream is so expectant of victory, why he takes it as just a matter of course, takes pleasure from it for sure but doesn’t act like it was difficult. He plays fair enough to still brag a little though, handicaps himself enough that it's satisfying, because Dream and the Corinthian are both approaching their relationship with exactly the right assessment of their enemy.

They use exactly the right tactic to match what they are up against.

In the show the Corinthian doesn’t engage at all until he has too. In my series he's finally is forced to engage, goaded to it, thinks he’s facing destruction anyway, and his method of brute force/going all in against Dream is exactly what he’s supposed to do to fight something so powerful. Dream’s relatively measured response—his tendency for non-engagement, his avoidance of a fight—is exactly what you’re supposed to do when fighting something weaker. The Corinthian is so incensed by it because Dream’s tactics prove inequality, prove what he’s being assessed as, and he’s trying to goad him into fighting/engaging with him as an equal.

Trying to find a weapon that will make Dream treat him as such.

The series spun out from a canon divergent idea of what would happen if Dream decided to engage in the way of ‘I will give you exactly what you want and you’ll still lose’. And that's so frustrating to the Corinthian because on the surface it looks like surrender. But it’s an enemy that surrenders at full strength—lays down all arms and smirks at you across the field—undermining the strength of the assault by rendering it meaningless, revoking the right to really test it for real because they won’t let you try and beat them. Won’t let you prove that you can.

So Dream, in a lot of ways, actually flips the dynamic by presenting what he fights back with as the weaker force and taking the 'prestige' out of the Corinthian's victories. It’s why the Corinthian likes to stage/arrange a bit of a fight. Imagine a struggle. And it’s why Dream likes to get him to ask for what he wants (ask when the Corinthian wants to just take) and is very strategic with when and how he indulges him in the staged/arranged fight.

Previously I mentioned vulnerability and this adds another layer to that. When you fight against something so much weaker than yourself with full force it looks like fear. It looks like vulnerability. Perhaps incompetence. Inefficiency. It’s insecure. It’s what you do when you’re not sure you can win, unwilling to risk a test of more even footing, overwhelming with numbers rather than skill. You punish a threat that way.

It lets an enemy know they’ve made you flinch.

(Though I must also add that if you wanted an enemy to think you were scared coming at them full force would be a good way to do it.)

Dream is very obviously goading the Corinthian into positions where it's easy to make this mistake while effortlessly holding back from doing it himself. He is always tempting him to leap at the chance for guaranteed victory—in the first fic, then in the binding etc—luring him with a display of vulnerability in the throne room. Getting him to try and strike when Dream seemed emotionally unstable. But also very powerful, luring with the prestige of what it would be for a smaller force to overtake his larger one, revealing just what a prize there is on offer.

The Corinthian has been learning the balance throughout the whole series. He is still going all in but not being stupid about it, not pulling his punches but definitely not wanting to give the impression of a lack of skill. Assessing what Dream is setting the board with and what level of strength is required from his own responses. I could have written the Corinthian doing the most nasty fucked up sexual stuff to Dream—he definitely indulges but for all my work is explicit I remember being like ‘is this too vanilla for them?’—but for me it would have overplayed the Corinthian’s hand. Overplayed determination and intellect into desperation. I didn’t want to take the power out of what I was writing.

Guess I’m using these battle tactics on my readers too haha because I definitely manipulate the view of unorthodox/orthodox behaviours. I will layer them in different ways, weight an encounter differently depending on how I'd like it to feel. As I said earlier…I’m a fan of subversion. And I will usually write something in exactly the opposite way of what’s expected.

The binding circle was the culmination of the first ‘arc’ of the series and it’s essentially a combination of all three of these different tactics. An unorthodox action, strength shown as weakness, Dream seemingly handing the Corinthian the means to beat him, allowing him the chance to attack him from a position of strength.

It evened the field yes. But it's also an example of when Dream presents himself as a 'weaker' force.

It made the Corinthian the larger army in a position to strike at a smaller one. The Corinthian realised that and didn’t attack with overwhelming force. He very much indulged but he was still strategic. He could have done some very nasty things to Dream in that binding circle (believe me I had a lot of imaginative ideas). It’s all about balance and flow for me, where my gut tells me the equilibrium needs to be. And there’s loads of character quirks on both sides that balance that.

(Especially since these little 'battles' are essentially a love language as much as a power struggle)

So the series is shifting the Corinthian to a more measured approach. Fun little skirmishes. Enjoying the game of it…the stages of the battle. In a way, Dream is very much teaching the Corinthian to play by the same principles I use to write, to play chess with him properly—testing his ability to do it—to come at him from an unorthodox position, to use his weakness (Dream allowed him the Binding Circle, then gave him further examples in CtK). To perhaps not be so stressed at not being engaged with (though this is shifting in the next arc because the Corinthian has definitely earned it), Dream not using full force for a reason. The battles able to have some equality because of that adjustment. 

Anyway. That’s how I write power (and that leads into how I write explicit fic too because, yeah, I feel like you might start to notice some battle tactics influencing all of my prose).

It’s why as much as Corintheus could call for some delightfully dark stuff, I will probably never write that unless the scenario is exactly right. (I have planned/considered what some of those scenarios might be). For me it can tip things too far. It’s the question of is this actually showing power or is it just disproportionate brutality? Is it a hammer instead of a scalpel? Also I agree with you about explicit fic—for all I’ve written so many of them! this is my first, and only, series of explicit works—and Dreamling was also one of the first ships I read for, though I am quite particular about it.

(It's also really really lovely to see someone share my love of Dream! So if ever you want someone to ramble excitedly with I am always ready to talk about how much I adore him!)

[mrpenguinpants]

YOU POSTED A THING! Ignore how long it took me to write this up, I've been,,, honestly? I've not been doing things, I've also not been doing this, but-

So the two plots stolen from Genshin is the Chenyu Vale story quest, and I've forgotten the second one, oops- I thiiiink it's kinda like the Mondstadt festival (the one where u have to pick that fuckin flower and it didn't matter abracafuckyou /lh)

LOOKING AT MY THINGS THERE WERE MORE okay hold on-

So the concept of the campaign is every character is a fallen god who's forgotten their divine life, and they regain a shred of their memory and now must find a way to ascend due to the fact that only Whole Mortals can reincarnate/be reborn, but if you die as a mortal-body divine-soul That's It (yadda yadda, non-dnd approved type shit; there are actually multiple ways they could go about it but I have no idea what they'll do beyond revive the sun) - One player didn't do that, but it's fine, he is instead POSESSED by a goddess, it's chill, and I adore his backstory and he's the only one with a backstory tightly interwoven with the world's lore and local area the campaign takes place in he is THE ONLY MAN WHO MATTERS T O M E (/j)

The Genshin Quests that I have plots for bc I stole them are as follows; Natzissenkreuz Ordo, Chenyu Vale, and the Windblume Festival. I won't get into it rn so you don't have to tag this ask as spoilers (unless... thinking emoji) BUT oooOOOOooOoOOo you wanna hear abt my dnd So Bad sdfsdfsdfg (I just wanna talk abt it SO BAD bc we're on a month hiatus bc one player's in the middle of bumfuck nowhere for a while)

I ALSO HAVE A ONESHOT PLANNED FOLLOWING/INSPIRED BY THIS YEAR'S SUMMER EVENT IN GENSHIN! I'm planning on running it at two tables (different groups) and potentially even a third when I get to sorting it out, ASK ME ABOUT IT PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE asdfgh

DND ASIDE- I recently found out one of my irls plays Genshin and I've been talking to him about it and honestly??? very nice, very fun (very demure /j) asdfgh I got into genshin to play w/ some other irls but now I am the last,,, genshin player standing,,,, and we're gonna help eachother farm when Natlan comes out bc I love running domains >:3 I'm a lil domain fiend

-Lucky

Ignore the fact that I'm responding backwards. But the pressure did work 👀 now I just need it to happen again because I blinked, and a month rolled around. I thought it was at most a week but no, my sense of time is fucked.

I'm so bad at names, and I barely do the story in any game I play unless I'm forced to (I missed an event in ZZZ because I wasn't on the third chapter yet ;-;). So I don't remember if I've done, seen, or even heard of the Chenyu Vale story, but I do know Mondstadt, at least.

I love it when my friends actually get invested enough with my imagination/ideas that they actually tie things into the ever-working narrative ;u; sometimes I feel like people don't do it because (they don't fucking care lol) they don't want to overstep on something that's made up by you. I understand, but man, it feels so uplifting when it happens. Keep that man alive. Are you planning on revealing parts of their divine life as the campaign goes on? I remember watching this youtube short about DND where they basically say that each player is given a blank sheet, and as they progress through the story they learn more things about their characters based on outside reactions.

I only know Windblume Festival but if it's a required quest/event quest, then I've most likely played the others. But yess, feel absolutely free to dump all your DND lore since I know you can't say it to your players unless you reveal too much. I'll tag spoilers in case you want to get more specific with the genshin quests because I do not remember any of them.

Here is your spotlight Lucky, lay it on me. What is this summer event-inspired oneshot?

I was talking to an old anon on another blog and it kinda makes me sad how the genshin community died out. Not in the sense that there's no fandom there, but that old players have either quit or lost interest. It makes me wonder if I even like genshin or if I write it because it's what I've been doing for so long.

[morikawamirai]

um hello! i'm really curious, is there like.. an introduction post for victimgram or official blog or anything? i want to learn more about victimgram; i just don't know where to start!

OH YEAH!!!! id (takamitakao) made an introductory-ish post in response to an ask a while ago, but i can try my best to kinda. explain it?? in my "guy who literally never shuts up ever" kind of fashion

basically, victimgram is KIND OF? what it says on the tin. a milgram au where MOST? of the victims swap with the prisoners. and I say most bc like… 1- there were some scenarios where we couldn't really picture their "confirmed" victim to actually manage to commit murder? (shidou, fuuta and yuno are like. the best examples of this) and 2- this au was admittedly… pre-triage, so we didn't have much to go for either LOL (it's the main reason aoi looks so different!!)

also yeah this means the main cast for milgram is dead so... oops

umm. i was putting a long desc for them but to summarize

warden killcheroy = fuuta's victim

mirai = the braids girl from haruka's mvs

coney = one of yuno's clients

rumerie = the pink haired guy from bring it on. most ppl know this dude

rei = rei

sayu = the middle school girl at the beginning of throw down. and also one of muu's friends in her mvs!!

aoi = mappi's boyfriend

hinako = kazui's wife

meowy = the cat in magic

eagle = mikoto's victim in MeMe

takao = the child kidnapper in harrow

we have a twitter too! which is where most of our posts go (which for the time being is mostly timeline convos until we actually have the undercover stuff ready!!!! (yes we have a victimgram undercover :muscle:) we used to have a bot too, but then m*sk killed twitter bot functionality </3

more than anything it's mainly an AU that me and some friends p much made for funsies?? but like. literally anyone showing interest makes us very very happy!! to the point you might have seen victimgram in passing in the live chats LOL. i could go for hours, but tumblr has a character limit on asks unfortunately </3

[crestfallercanyon]

weekly tag wednesday friday (these last few weeks have been absolute hell so I've missed the last couple i've been tagged in-- but I'm still here!)💞

tagged by the loveliest peoples: @jrooc, @mmmichyyy <3

name and ao3 handle: crest, crestfallercanyon

current location: sitting at my desk at home technically off work but waiting for one person to email me back goddammit

favorite picrew (don't have one?you can skip this or do this one)? (I don't actually smoke btw, but I liked the aesthetic here)

what's one thing you want in a picrew? i hardly ever do them. guess freckles?

favourite thing you’ve created for the fandom? oh that's hard. I loved writing a lot of my fics, but probably was most excited with the final product of all these things I have left to say to you.

why is it your favourite? it'd been a long time since I'd written anything in the first person, especially in an epistolary format. I loved getting in both Ian and Mickey's heads for a fic. I love writing things that are mildly frightening and very surreal, and it was fun to be able to do that here. Especially when people realize what life is like for another person, which Mickey has a moment of clarity when it comes to Ian's BPD in this fic, so. That's probably why.

did it come easily or was it hard to create? It actually came together much faster than I thought it would. I didn't anticipate having much of a part two either, but then I just started going.

last ao3 fic you commented on? Past Anterior by noyeahtotally (Inception) for the third time, I forgot I commented on it previously, but I love that fic.

biggest wip heartache you’ve ever experienced? oh god there's been so many. I'm going to go with the one that immediately came to mind when I thought of this question though and that's A Hundred Thousand Loves (for just this one) by @subjecta5newtella

favorite trope or head canon you like included in a fanfic? don't know if it's a trope, but I do enjoy a good enemies/rivals to lovers. headcanon, for shameless in particular -- which I now realize i don't know if I've ever done this in my fics oops -- but I love when Ian's attention on Mickey feels like a goddamn spotlight. Boy has an intense stare and I think his attention on someone like Mickey, who usually vies for attention via violence and otherwise doesn't want to be bothered, has to both make him itchy and make him preen. I don't know, I just think Ian's full attention, the way he stares, it just seems very focused and I think it'd be a bit like "whoa, shit, okay"

least favourite? love that these are out here for other people, but I personally am not a big fan of a/b/o or mpreg. Also I don't like when characters get super shmoopified by love -- make 'em as lovesick as you want, but even at the most lovesick lovelorn, there are some characters who will not call the object of their affection "pookie"

secret or surprising kink or trope? I love when characters have to pretend to be something they're not? I don't know how else to describe it, but like spontaneous fake dating/fake hating, pretending to be a certain job because they got caught somewhere they shouldn't be, pretending to be an entirely different person in front of the object of their affection because of shenanigans, I find that really fun. Done well, it's just delightful to see the mounting horror of characters look at their loved one like "what in the actual hell are you doing" or having to join in on the charade and be like "what in the actual hell are we doing?"

describe how you feel after you’ve created something new? depends on what I've posted! Sometimes I feel good, sometimes I mainly feel nervous that I fucked something up or forgot something. usually I feel pretty good though.

top hype man you have that always helps you get across the finish line: the discord servers I'm part of are filled with the loveliest hype people -- and then of course I cherish every comment I receive on fics after <3

it's been a bad day, you turn to the fandom and you _____? read something I've read a thousand times, the same I do with my television -- I go to something I've read or watched so many times that makes my heart happy.

I'm not going to tag anyone because I am already SO late! But thanks for including me still <3

[endlessthedestiny]

for a long time now ive been thinking about the HS typing quirks and what would the quirks be for sandman characters, so im making this long ass post just to eliminate this from my system

disclaimer: english is not my first language (classic) and if you disagree or have a different headcanon pls share i want to hear (if some may seem ooc my deepest apologies)

Morpheus

Writes in italic.

Bold for emphasis. can also *rarely* use asterisks.

No emoticons, but probably used "*-*" in some conversation with Death.

Normal capitalization and punctuation. If mistype, corrects expressively (ex. "I meant afternoon, sorry.)

If comfortable, uses keyboard smash (ex. "Ahshsnsbj") to laugh.

Death

Doesn't capitalize the beginning of the phrase or utilizes final dot unless she wants to be taken seriously.

Sometimes use the emoticons ":)", ":(", "^_^" only with those she is intimate/trusts. Uses frequently with Delirium.

Emphasis is CAPITALIZED.

When mistypes corrects with *asterisk.

Avoids sending a wall of texts, preferring send small texts to form a big text.

Desire

Italic.

Not severe with capitalization or punctuation. only cares and uses it perfect if wants to be taken seriously.

If sending a big message (+3 lines) ends with a "~ <3", otherwise, only uses "~".

Syllables repetition only to annooooy, with ellipsis at the end. . .

Only emoticon used is ";)"

For emphasis, utilizes *asterisk*.

Also corrects mistypes with *asterisk, and sometimes adds a "oops" or similar at the end.

Despair

Capitalization In Every Word, but the punctuation is perfect.

Bold for the emphasis.

Uses ellipsis in the end of most phrases. . .

Also only send ellipsis if doesn't want to answer.

Rarely mistypes, but if do, doesn't correct.

Destiny

Again, italic.

Capitalization and punctuation perfect.

Doesn't mistype, and corrects the others faster than the person themselves.

Bold for emphasis.

But when angry and wants to be taken more seriously, uses exclamation marks at the end!

Sends empty messages if doesn't want to answer.

Answers in a unbelievable speed. Sometimes send multiple responses almost at once.

If wants to laugh (which RARELY occurs) sends "Ha, ha, haha."

Destruction

ALL CAPS. Inconsistent punctuation.

Double square brackets to [[EMPHASIS]].

Laughs with "OHOHOHO" and similar.

Sometimes uses ":DDD" by influence of Delirium.

When mistypes, very rarely corrects, and corrects expressively (ex. "I MEANT TOMORROW").

Delirium

wRiTES cApITaLiZiNg RAndOmly. punctuation.. it's complicated. she knows how to use question marks that's much I guess

She starts every phrase (when she remembers) with "@ - - >"

For emphasis, she alternates between ****ASTERISKS****, (((TRIPLE PARENTHESIS))), bold and FULL CAPS.

When more controlled, she capitalizes less (ex. "iTs Me."). But the more she is angry or ansious, the harder becomes to understand what she's saying (she replaces some letters with random symbols, keyboard smashes mid phrase etc).

She uses every type of emoticon possible. But her favorites apparently are ":D" and "@__@". Kaomojis are rarely used.

Sometimes Barnabas translates what she's saying. (Ex. Del: "@ - - > iM sOOOoOooy hApPPY!!!! ajahshshhshd". Barbanas: "She said I'm so happy.")

Laughs with keyboard smash, the longer the funnier.

When she mistypes, she doesn't correct. Also dislikes when someone excessively corrects her.

okay now some extras, I didn't think much about them so yea

Lucifer

When he mistypes, he corrects himself as fast as he can. But Destiny always corrects his mistypes first and faster which pisses him off. But Lucifer also corrects the people when they mistype to annoy or simply to correct.

Sometimes simply answers "A" or "K".

Also laughs with "Hah". Already laughed with ))) at some point.

Corinthian

He uses ";)" and "B)".

Begins the phrases with < less than and finishes with greater than >

Hob

When sending a long text, finishes with "~ H."

The one who said that Morpheus is the "*-*" emoticon, and insists in using it with him.

okay im tired, if anything I will edit this post or simply reblog with additions. also now im feeling guilty of tagging cori and hob but whatever

thank you if you read allat

[queerdraws]

i love your postcard artwork for the zolu playlist SO much!! the colours are so so good and i love the brushwork! i think my favourites are a tie between the one for chikai and the one for simple song <3 also, I was wondering if you could share what brushes you used + how long they took you! looking at your art makes me want to draw again after not doing it for so long

Thank you!! and wow i think this is the first time someone's asked me for my brushes, this is like a digital artist rite of passage!

Answers n screenshots n stuff under cut (I went a little to ham on this oops)

While we're talking settings I want to give a quick PSA to all digital artists:

CHECK UR ASPECT RATIO!!!: (MOST IMPORTANT SETTING BY FAR)

DO NOT DRAW WITH THIS ALL MESSED UP, IT WILL DRIVE YOU CRAZY. It's probably good to check this after every system update (I don't, but, you know...). Windows likes to mess w your shit when it updates.

If you have a really tiny tablet you might need to trace outside a bottle lid or something.

Okay now on to the meat of the post

-- Brush Stuff --

I use Clip Studio Paint. For my playlist drawings I think I only used these brushes (these are my main 3 in general) (p.s. they're all default brushes! but i've adjusted the settings):

1) Gouache This is most of what i used for the postcards. I nuked Color Stretch because i hate it (it blends colors together as you're painting, like painting over wet paint. I prefer things to look more crisp)

2) Real G-Pen Used this as little as possible, to keep the painterly effect. My preferred fine-detail pen, has a nice crunch to it. I've fine-tuned my setting further in the thickness dynamics / brush size dynamics settings because I mostly use this brush for linework and wanted it to handle really, really naturally and precisely

The random box is checked by default, probably to make this brush feel more like handling a real inkdip pen (I don't like that)

3) Mapping Pen Least used. I generally keep this brush at the 50-70px range. It's unpleasant to use for detail work (the taper is really fiddly at my tablet pressure settings) but good at filling in large areas very opaque very quickly, with a crisp edge (Also, doesn't lag as much as the gouache brush at large-ish sizes). Has enough wiggle room that it can be used to approximately fill tighter spaces at large brush sizes. Used for when I needed to quickly color over an area that wasn't working or quickly fill in background color that didn't need paintbrush texture. Did not realized the stabilization was set to 10 until just now. I usually turn that waaay down to prevent lag (my laptop isn't very old but it's a sensitive beast)

Other stuff that'll help:

General pen pressure: (under File -> Pen Pressure Settings)

tweaking how CSPaint handled my pen pressure helped a lot with making lineart look more natural. It's worth messing around with this and trying out different settings for a while to see how they feel.

-- How Long it Takes 2 Draw --

I don't really keep track of how long art takes me from start to finish, and making the playlist drawings was kinda nonlinear 😅 sorry!

-> I started out sketching really quick composition and color ideas as the songs were playing, limiting myself to just the duration of each song (so like, 5 minutes for this part) -> i did that again at least 2 more times per song -> after that, idk. I would work on one pic then get stuck and move to another. Some I could hammer out in like... 5 hours? Some took me upwards of 20 (30?) hours for no real reason (I have "will graham clock" days, where I'll try to draw a face over and over and it'll look really strange, like will graham's clock drawing every time) (this seems to be either a vitamin deficiency or a brainfog inflammation type thing 4 me 😵‍)

I'll use ur two favorites as specific examples: -> Chikai was one that went pretty quickly (with the exception of their arms and the clothing folds there giving me trouble). Probably took 4-6 hours? -> Simple Song had a couple different versions, partially because I initially had the cards all laid out landscape-style, and I decided I actually wanted them all portrait-style & repainted it after it was already done. That aside, the colors /atmosphere on that one gave me trouble and the general composition / perspective had a lot of tweaks (I was trying to figure out if I wanted it to be a kinda flat stylistic perspective or if I wanted it to make more literal sense, trying to figure out what to do with luffy, trying to make him not look Too baby boy sweetie pie). Probably took 7-10 hours...?

In-progress landscape versions: (varying levels of in-progress)

Misc in-progress of Chikai and Simple Song:

Simple song looks kinda sequential like this lmao. Luffy looks like he's A-posing and floating away to the boat and then sitting down pleasantly in it. Wonderful. --

Anway -- hope any of that was helpful!

[fireskarr]

Asura Appreciation Week - Day 3

DAY THREE - AUGUST 22nd Does your OC have a krewe? What do they specialize in? How do they get along with each other? @asura-appreciation-corner

A bit late with this one because y'know, new expansion launch and all. And I'm dumb and didn't prepare any of these posts in advance

The story of Tenakk's little band of misfits is going to be a bit of a long post.

So I'll start with the first three:

Tenakk Aside from the krewes he was a part of during college, Tenakk never really had a krewe of his own for a while. He was content to work alone most of the time, which was part of the reason he ended up joining the Durmand Priory later on. Aside from his research into destroyers, he was also a really talented artificer, which he used to earn a little extra income.

Milo Milo was raised by humans, and so his mannerisms and world view is quite different from the average asura. His first visit to Rata Sum didn't go so well, and he struggled to understand and fit into asuran society. This is where he met Tenakk for the first time, and they became good friends. What Milo lacks in fighting ability, he more than makes up for it with his talents in healing magic and crafting medicines. He is very sociable, and has many contacts from the medical work he carried out around Divinity's Reach. If Tenakk ever needs a particular item or information, Milo probably knows someone who can provide it.

Sparxxi A typical Dynamics student; she likes tinkering with machines, and creating gadgets to tinker with more machines. She used to be part of a krewe in Lion's Arch, creating festival decorations and organising fireworks displays. When Scarlet's attack on the city destroyed everything she knew, she was left sitting around in one of the refugee camps with no home or friends. She noticed Milo and Tenakk helping out some of the refugees, and she pretty much latched onto them, refusing to go until they gave her a job. Tenakk eventually relented and offered her a job as an assistant.

For a short time, the three of them worked together in Tenakk's workshop/makeshift lab. They didn't consider themselves an official krewe at the time, it was pretty much 'Tenakk and Friends' doing odd jobs and projects.

And then Sparxxi heard about the Pact forces mustering in the Silverwastes, preparing to go to war against an Elder Dragon. She really wanted to get a closer look at the airships, and ended up sneaking aboard one of them. Just before the fleet set off into Maguuma to fight Mordremoth. Oops.

About two years later, Tenakk recieved a letter from her which essentially read: "Hey I found these awesome Mists researchers, you should come join us! Also, I'm alive!"

Which leads us on to the next three:

Tenkatt One of Tenakk's best kept secrets is his failed experiment with the Infinity Ball; a device intended to show a glimpse of a possible future. But unbeknownst to him it did kind of work, and an alternate future version of himself materialised. But unlike the in-game story character of 'Grand High Sovereign', this alternate Tenakk has no desire to conquer the world, he just wants it to not fall into Void as a result of killing Elder Dragons. So it's safe to say he's not a fan of the Commander.

He stayed out of sight for a while, and joined up with the Aetherblades to poke around with their Mist portal technology. He had no interest in working for Scarlet, so when the 'Blades ended up trapped in the Mists after Scarlet's death, he took the first opportunity he could to steal one of their airships and escape the Mists long before the others figured out how to do it (he's done this before). Problem is, the portal he opened up just happened to lead right into the middle of the battle between Pact forces and the Mouth of Mordremoth in the jungle.

Here he crossed paths with Sparxxi, and her reaction was basically: "Wow, Tenakk has a twin brother!" She offered to fix up his airship and persuaded him not to go after the Commander. Many of the events he had witnessed were different from the ones he knew from his alternate reality, so he decided to stick around to see how things play out.

He and Tenakk often bicker about the best course of action, and he still doesn't agree they should be helping the Commander. The one thing they seem to agree on is that cats are great. And if anyone asks: they really are brothers.

Trellia Not actually an asura, but an inquisitive Mist creature that Tenkatt encountered while stuck in the Mists (if you're a GW1 fan, basically like Razah). Technically genderless, but has chosen to take the form of a female asura in an attempt to blend in. Trellia is a skilled Chronomancer, and also seems to have the ability to detect and manipulate some Mists-related anomalies without the need for technology.

Mellu (The hat isn't canon, it's just the best screenshot I have right now) Mellu is a seasoned Mist Warrior who seems to have lost all memory of her life outside the Mists. She often ventures out into the Mist War and returns with a variety of resources ranging from useful materials to odd/bizarre trinkets.

Special mention: Fluffy

Fluffy was adopted as an adorable griffon chick under threat by Icebrood monsters in the Shiverpeaks. He allows the krewe to go places where an airship would draw too much attention (or can't reach). He likes griffon races, fish, and Aurene.

**---The Moebius Krewe---**

(sometimes I call them the Infinity Krewe because I still can't decide)

Officially formed in 1331AE to track and deal with the rifts left by Kralkatorrik's rampage through the Mists, although they had been tracking other anomalies prior to that event. They often collaborate with the Commander to collect data and send help to citizens affected by creatures which have escaped from the Mists. I guess you could call them a first response & rescue team specialising in Mists-related events and disasters, though they often take on side-projects in general Mists research.

[azelle-intermisson]

Echo vn review

i have finally finished echo as my second ever visual novel after adastra. i really loved this vn and it was a super interesting read. for anyone who hasn't read it if a furry horror vn with very human feeling characters peaks your interest then i would 100% recommend echo its a really good story with some really strong characters that i enjoyed thoroughly. in this review im gonna be going through all the main cast and some of the side cast so its gonna be a kinda long post where i just gush about parts of each route i really liked but there will be titles before each section if you want to see what i have to say about one character in particular for whatever reason.

this review is all my opinion and is not going to be exhaustive so i will end up missing some things (mainly because i did not take notes while reading and forgot a lot oops). so if there is something i missed you wanna hear my opinion on ask :). also this is my first time writing something like this so lmk if there are things i can do better if i end up doing this again.

SPOILERS FOR THE WHOLE GAME AFTER THE READ MORE

before i fully dive into the review i wanna go over some of the external factors that have influenced how i view this vn. during flynn's route i was the most sick ive ever been in my whole life and im pretty sure i missed out on some vital details because of the brain fog during that sickness. i am not well versed at all in vns the only other vn i have played is adastra, however i am familiar with romance tropes so even though i feel like i missed out on some cool moments simply because i haven't played many vns i did not miss out entirely. also about halfway through my playthrough i learned that there is kinda an order you are supposed to read the routes in which is:  Carl > Leo > TJ > Flynn > Jenna, i ended up reading it in this order: TJ > Leo > Flynn > Jenna > Carl. i don't really know how much this ended up changing how i view the story but thats how i did it. i also made chase gay i don't really know what that ended up affecting since i played all the routes as gay chase and whenever i got something i considered a "bad ending" i would reset to my last decision and do something different. the last thing that might have some sway on how i feel is how sweet the community has been to me so far, i don't usually get myself involved with a community before i finish something but this time was different since i was making fan art and everyone was super nice <3

Visuals/Music

I really loved the music and artwork for this game. i feel like the music did such a good job of creating an atmosphere whether it was chilling in the diner with jenna and tj or getting kidnapped by brian it always did an amazing job at really putting me in the shoes of the characters. i adored all of the fully rendered drawings throughout the game i love the colors i love everything about it. of all of them i think the one below is my favorite i just love how serene it looks.

this was my favorite track i feel like it does such a good job of capturing the tone of the whole game so well or the one that plays whenever they are just chilling idk what its called and i can't find it for the life of me it is driving me crazy.

Misc

there are a few things i couldn't quite fit into any of the next sections so i wanted to put them here. i really loved every character in this game i feel like the reason why i loved them all was because of how human they felt. whenever someone did something i didn't agree with i always defaulted to sympathizing with them because of how human they felt to me. also after writing this i have realized my ranking of each of the routes is just how much leo is involved with each of them i guess i just really love the guy.

Prologue

this part of the game is a little less fresh in my mind since i only read through it once on my first playthrough but from what i remember it did a really good job of establishing the setting and getting me interested in the lore of these characters. the first river scene was such an amazing moment i love how the route split happens in a way that makes you choose between emotionally comforting someone or going after who you want to romance. my only issue with it was that i did not realize that this was a route split in my first playthrough and ended up picking tj since he seemed the most affected by flynn and i was really worried about him even though the character i really wanted to romance was leo. even though i did not realize it was a game with so many diverging paths at first i still think the prologue was really good and got me very invested in the lore of echo.

MAIN CAST

Chase

i walked into this game not really expecting to care for chase too much since i kinda didn't like marco in adastra and i was expecting him to be more of the same type of guy but i was pleasantly surprised. i hate it so much when player inserts are just blank slates so im very glad that chase is an actual character who interacts with the world and people around him. he never had any moments where i was frustrated with him and wished he had said something different(aside from the ending of tj's route) and for the most part he reacted the way i think i would in his situation so i really liked him in all of the routes.

TJ

in retrospect i really like tj's route for how subversive it is as a romance with tj not reciprocating chases feelings and how nasty chase's jealousy felt. while playing it i kept waiting for leo to show up and whenever chase would try and romantically pursue him i would get kinda sad because i wanted to hangout with big wolf man. however i feel like this gave me a really interesting perspective on this route since before chase even kissed tj i never expected them to actually get together since it didn't feel like tj was all that interesting to me. this made chase's jealousy over julian feel even more scary than it already was and that final confrontation at the lake with flynn horrifying. i loved how the horror aspects where handled in this route and how subtle a lot of it was in comparison to other routes. chase drowning flynn and the description of it is one of the most haunting things from this game for me. overall i thought tj's route was pretty good even if i spent the whole thing wanting to hangout with leo because i was dumb and didn't know i had gotten to the route split. its in 4th place in order of my favorite routes in this game.

Leo

leo's route is my favorite i love him so much. i love how you get the bad ending of his route for trying to stay with him. his route was also my first time seeing the hysteria in full swing so that was a crazy twist. every single scene with brian made me feel so anxious i never really knew what to expect from him. i loved how his unhealthy obsession with chase was treated with the weight that it really deserved. the way he reacts to kudzu and chase's relationship not only feels like a natural progression of his character but also adds so much to the horror of his route since his jealousy often ends up causing serious harm. it was so sad to see him unravel and act the way he does during the hysteria because i really wanted to see him be happy and somehow move on from chase. the final scene of the "good" ending gave me what i wanted in the most evil way possible. i had wanted him to move on so bad that i had forgotten how brutal moving on can actually be. leo ends up losing the person he is closest to in the worst way possible i say this with love though it made me cry real hard. and the implication that he is planning on staying in echo is too just heartbreaking. i could go on forever about all the things i love about leo's character but i don't want this section to be too long so i will end it here and say leo is my favorite of the main cast and he has my favorite route of this whole game.

Flynn

i feel super conflicted on flynn's route, it does so many things so well but the ending left me feeling weird. i wanna talk about the things i liked first, which is most of the route. aside from leo he was the character i was most interested from the prologue mainly because i could tell that he wasn't just going to be a one-note mean guy and i thought he had a ton of potential for a really interesting story and i was right . i really enjoyed how his mean demeanor was written the times when he decided to be nice never felt out of character, like the way he helps carl with his interview and really wants his friend to do well and when things don't turn out well he still supports carl but does it in such a flynn way i just loved it so much. flynn and chase's relationship during this route stressed me out the most out of all of the routes mainly because of how they hid it from leo i really wanted chase to just talk to leo about everything but i can understand why he was avoiding it so much. i really loved the reveal of chase killing sydney and how flynn reacts to it. the way everything in that scene plays out was just amazing i can't be mad at either side of the it since i can understand why jenna and leo don't want to believe that their childhood friend killed someone but i can also understand flynn's immediate reaction to this and wanting to lash out at chase. the sydney flashback really got to me everything about it felt so real to me and flynn trying to take a big brother role for sydney and try and protect him from seeing the corpse anymore was so heartbreaking. my favorite part of this route was when you get the perspective of flynn rather than chase it was not something i was expecting in the slightest and i was so happy to be able to see some of his thought process when he does stuff. i really liked the hysteria portion of his route but im a little iffy on the ending. on one hand i like it for the story the fact that flynn dies kinda makes sense to me i just really wished he had lived and we had gotten to see a healed flynn who now knows the truth of what happened fully, even though i know this vn doesn't like giving out easy solutions. overall flynn's route is really good i just wish it had ended differently i would put it at 3rd place in my ranking of the routes in this game.

Jenna

i almost adore jenna's route as much as leo's. i really like her personality and aside from leo she is my favorite character. learning that she likes manga and watching anime with her was such a fun little moment that i thought was cute. it really surprised me when carl went missing in this route i was kinda expecting his birthday to play out the same in every route but i this was a really good plotline. i liked that this route forced jenna and flynn to interact more since the tension they have is always so fun to read. i loved the side characters in this route micha was my favorite out of all of them(even though i think jeremy is really cute). i want to give micha his own section in this review but to put it shortly his relationship with leo made me super happy. i really liked the tension between jenna and leo it was such a good conflict that i enjoyed reading. the whole fake cheating prank was such a gut wrenching scene that i was honestly having a hard time getting through. i liked the section where they are kidnapped by brian more in this route than in leo's mainly because brian getting rocked by the ghost thing was really satisfying. the implication that carl was tortured the same way chase was for multiple days is unfathomable to me. leo and chase being sewn together made me feel sick because anything remotely body horror related gets me and micha having to sever that tie was really cool foreshadowing for leo and micha's whole thing. the whole van section was also really incredible and seeing leo start to move on from chase warmed my heart in an otherwise very intense route. i liked heather she is such an intresting character to me since i really want to sympathize with her because its clear she has a lot of unresolved trauma but she was also an asshole to jenna and tried to flood all of echo. i really loved her trying to flood the town it is such a crazy plot point but i still really loved it and jenna having to put aside how shitty heather was to her to talk her down was a really good moment. the dinner scene after everything also felt very satisfying and it was good to see micha be apart of the group for a bit his interactions with everyone made me smile. i really liked jenna's route all around it is my 2nd favorite and was a super fun read.

Carl

i really liked carl's route i relate to a lot of his struggles and even though there where less scenes that scared me it was still really good. this was the last route i played so i was feeling kinda melancholic while reading since echo had become my nightly routine for about 3 weeks and i was really loving the characters and story. i liked how much lighter(in comparison to the other routes) of a tone carl's route took staying over at his big haunted mansion is such a silly concept on paper but it ends up playing out super well. i thought raven was a silly guy even if he didn't really add or remove much from this route and he helped keep jenna somewhat in check so that was nice. the escape room stuff was so interesting to go through. i found myself feeling scared that they may not actually make it out or they would end up killing each other. my favorite scene from this route was the hanging tree stuff. i had such a vivd picture of everything happening and it was really hard to watch jenna and carl to do things that i know they wouldn't. this route also had a ton of echo lore so i kinda wish i had played it first since i feel like i missed out in other route because i was trying to piece together things that are revealed in carl's route. i really liked the james hendricks and john begay stuff . even though carl's route is my 5th favorite by no means do i think it's bad.

Side Characters

i'm not going to only talk about the ones that really stood out to me and in a much shorter way than the main cast (other than micha)

Micha

micha is my favorite of the whole side cast and i really adored him and leo's relationship that i interpreted as romantic during the last bit of jenna's route. at first i didn't really like him and thought he was kinda an asshole. as the plot kept going i kept getting more and more attached to him since he was still an asshole but he was working with the main group. normally i don't like characters like him but i feel like he was written in such a realistic way that i found it hard to stay mad at him. i really loved him and leo's relationship their connection felt so real and i think they could be soooooo good for each other. the van scene was so incredible the way the player and chase have to fill in the blanks as leo and micha talk about what happened between the two of them really immersed me in the story .leo feeling guilt over never reaching out to micha after he was disowned was such an interesting thing i never really expected leo to want to help someone who was a bully to his friends but i still feel like it makes sense for leo to feel this way since he just wants to protect people. i think its really sweet that leo ends up leaning on micha more after the van scene. also the scene in the dinner at the end of jenna was really sweet i loved seeing micha being added to their group dynamic and i wish i got even more. in conclusion leo and micha should kiss and live happily ever after <3.

Brian and Clint

i don't have a lot to say about these guys other than the fact that they are horrifying antagonists. before i saw brian fight i was under the assumption that if leo is present then we are probably safe but brian ends up breaking that sense of safety in such a horrifying way. i like that even though clint isn't physically strong the fact that he has the strongest character following his orders made him so intimidating

Jeremy

i wanna give him a big kiss even tho he is mean

Janice

i really liked janice in tj's route. i love the fact that we never get a clear answer for why she needed chase and tj to be digging holes. i almost want to trust that she isn't killing people but she clearly has a few screws loose.

Closing Thoughts

i really loved this furry visual novel and its really human feeling characters. i had way more to say about it than i thought and the more i write the more i love the story and the more i want to say but this is already such a long post. i liked adastra more but i don't really feel like it is a fair comparison because if i hadn't played adastra this account would not exist and i prob would not be drawing at all but maybe if i had played echo first it would have done that to me since it still is really good. this was super fun to write even tho i know some of it might not make any sense lol because this is just kinda stream of conscious. i might end up doing this with other things i read/watch since it also gives me an actual reason to take notes when i read/watch things. also i wanna say thank you to the community on here i haven't been involved with fandom spaces for a really long time and im still not very involved with this one but you guys have been super nice and i wanna continue making art and talking about this game :)

[bonesandthebees]

SHAKES UR HAND PRISMO !!!

together we can convince the bee tumblr community to become as obsessed with it as us

ALSO DAMNNN DEDICATED /POS

on a side note-

hold up

on a side side note: i get so distracted in these asks bee omfg im so sorry, i feel like my high energy can get too much sometimes KFDSJKDF pls let me know if u need me to turn it down a notch, i just get excited whenever i talk about fics soo aksdfjkSKJDF

anyways on the original side note: talking about the bee tumblr community just made me think about it, it really does feel like a sort of family <3 i love seeing all the random updates from the different anons here and getting to connect to you and to each other, it feels much more wholesome and secure than places like twt LMFAOO but idk it's just nice <3

i had tumblr for awhile but i never used it until i started reading the asks here, and it took me awhile to join in bc i felt intimidated skfdkjsd which is ironic bc yknow i could always go anon? but idk it just felt like everyone had their groove going and i didn't want to intrude, but i joined and i never felt that way

anyways oops this got long (as it always does kjfsdkj), but i just wanted to say that i appreciate you bee <3 for letting us anons n non anons ramble in ur ask box and analyze ur fics and/or just straight up scream noncoherent things

this has been a bright spot in my life lately and it's really special to me <333 and ur genuinely like . one of the kindest authors i've met, but you also have such a good sense of your boundaries n stuff, i admire you really. ur super cool

and also to all the other sillies in bee's asks, i appreciate u guys too <3 ur all super cool people, and i love hearing what you have to say :)) it's genuinely really nice and comforting to be a part of this community <33

lol no you're fine icy!! while it can be a Lot it always makes me laugh whenever I post a chapter of something that has sandduo in it and my inbox just fills with you screaming. it makes me so happy to know how excited my fics make you and the others though so :D

the thing you said about the tumblr community we have here is so sweet though and it's more right than I think even I realized initially. it's really nice when I see regular askers/anons pop up in my inbox and get to catch up on tiny parts of your lives and then in turn you guys talk to each other—it's just so sweet y'know? the thing I really love about having such an active inbox especially with asks about my fics is that it's a lot easier for me to respond to tumblr asks than ao3 comments. I rarely reply to ao3 comments because it's really just overwhelming and then I'm like "well if I respond to one person I feel bad about not responding to everyone else" but sometimes I just don't know what to say or there's just too many comments y'know? I LOVE my ao3 comments they mean so much to me but it's really nice to have people come into my inbox here to tell me their thoughts on my chapters bc it gives me a chance to reply with my own thoughts in a way that feels a lot more like a discussion I guess

so yeah. thank you guys for coming into my inbox to give me your thoughts it seriously makes me so happy and is definitely part of the reason why I have so much motivation to post so much.

also I'm really glad you decided to start popping in here one day icy you're very fun to have around :)

one thing I've always been very aware of since getting 'big' in this fandom is how to maintain things like boundaries while still connecting with the community and my readers specifically. because I wanna talk to you guys and I love interacting with you and all that, but also sometimes people in fandom who get 'big' can be a bit strange to others or get way too involved with discourse and just stir the pot and to each their own do fandom how you want but I don't wanna do that y'know. I'm here to have a good time and I want this little community we've built to also just be a nice, welcoming place for everyone

thank you for this icy it really made me smile to read <3

[dagursb1tch]

also another random thought i had about tnr while i was watching the finale episode. i wondered how different it would be if the humans and the dragons actually decided to keep living together instead of it basically having the same outcome as in the 3rd movie, where they separated and took on their own separate lives? ( this post became long asf so im just gonna put it under a cut oop, & it also contains spoilers for tnr s8!! )

lemme explain — when httyd 3 came out, i remember that there were (and still are) a lot of disagreements with its ending since the whole message of the franchise seemed to be about two different species living in harmony and working together especially after their centuries-long history of being enemies, and a lot of fans voiced that the ending of the 3rd movie kind of betrayed that message. of course, the franchise's argument was that it wasn't safe for the dragons and the humans to be together because there will always be greedy humans out there to harm the dragons — in the context of the show, sledkin's and buzzsaw's "arcs" (if you can even call them that) were sort of modern reflections of that danger that could come to the dragons with their existence being public knowledge. of course, we can see this throughout the original franchise as well, from viggo and ryker to drago and grimmel and their respective allies and armies.

basically what i'm trying to get at here is if this series decided to take an alternate route and have the dragons and the humans live in harmony together instead of separating (again), would that have been a chance to "undo" the 3rd movie's "mistakes"? or was it better for the series to go the more "traditional" route and take after the 3rd movie, expressing that even after over 1000 years of humans and dragons living apart, it's simply not safe for the humans and dragons to live together because of the loss of the secrets of the dragons, for the world not knowing about them and in turn not knowing how to take care of them and protect them from the evil of some humans? (of course, i'm putting everything in quotes here because i am attempting to describe everything from a non-objective standpoint, including opinions about the 3rd movie in particular which i am still grappling to come to any conclusions with for myself.)

my views retain a considerable separation between the original franchise and this show, mostly because, in this series in particular, we have. ahem. capitalism. particularly the really nasty late stage "i'm gonna control every aspect of your life" capitalism. as many of us may know, many capitalists will stop at nothing to procure their earnings, even if it means exploiting living beings for their profits and developments. sledkin's whole "arc" was a demonstration of this, her desire for fame and money and profit leading to an eventual disregard for the well-being of the subjects she was studying — and eventually using — to get her fame and her profit. her lack of ethics in her practice shows just how much she was influenced by this system, and in turn caused her to develop a disregard for the well-being of the dragons, the subjects of her study (besides the dragonsite ofc). to me, it kind of demonstrated how these systems make the ethics within scientific research very difficult. like sledkin, if you only care about the money, it's likely that you probably don't care about the safety and well-being of the subjects you're studying. which in a sense, is also a reflection of the villains of the original franchise — they wanted something so badly that they didn't care who they hurt in order to get it.

anyways i didn't mean for this to turn into a whole fucking essay, just a post for me to explore my thoughts about this show now that it's finally ended. and idk to those who bothered to watch this last season what are y'all's thoughts??? lol

[nexo-nex]

Been thinking about the EAH x Selfridges merch Mattel did around 2013... It's certainly something that existed. I never see people bring them up on here, so why not write a long post about it? A little thread below about this rather obscure collaboration:

The EAH x Selfridges was a rather limited time edition designer collaboration that was made for the Frieze Art Fair, which was held in London on October 15th 2013. They created a total of 8 exclusive items: 3 shirts, 4 bags and 1 doll.

Let's take a look at the shirts first. They made only 3 white shirts with Raven, Apple and the main core cast girls using watercolor paintings made by Princess Julia. They costed $30 each. More info about this can be found on Princess Julia's Blogspot.

(Apple and Maddie being mishmashed together on that 3rd shirt is kinda cursed ngl)

There were also carrier bags with these same paintings that were given away around the time of the event.

There was also these bags. According to the little info available about it, they costed around $250 each, and were made by four different designers in the Selfridges team: Claire Barrow, Ashley Williams, Ryan Lo and Bobby Abley, which were all inspired by EAH characters:

The first one with the racoon bag was created by designer Ashley Williams inspired by... Apple White? This is what Williams said about the design choice:

"I was inspired by Apple White who is the daughter of Snow White," said Williams. "I thought it would be cute for her to have a woodland creature as her pet, so the handbag I've designed is in the shape of a raccoon as I thought its stripy tail would be cool in multicolour." Source: Vogue

The shattered mirror looking one is inspired by Raven Queen and was created by Claire Barrow, whom quoted:

"I've been inspired by the daughter of The Evil Queen in Snow White. I wanted to do something with a smashed mirror to show rebellion against her past and against the traditional norms of beauty."  Source: Vogue

We also got these three tea bags designed by Ryan Lo and who were inspired by Madeline Hatter (mostly based on her color pallete)

And last we have this bear-bag designed by Bobby Abley, and which it was inspired by Blondie Lockes.

(Personal opinion: I think it was a rather weird design choice to make this bag's colors red and white. Aside from the bear theme going on, It doesn't bear much resemblance to Blondie's design, I think it would have looked better if they gave it a Blue/Yellow scheme to it, but this is just my opinion lmao)

And last but not least, we also got this ""Blondie Lockes"" exclusive doll (let's be real that's not Blondie that's an Apple doll ffs) which was also made by Bobby Abley. According to the very first pic in the thread, the doll was sold for $120 (apparently).

(Also I've never seen anyone with this doll in their collection, it's so obscure that not even pictures of her doll box are available online, very interesting indeed).

Like I said before, there is not much information about this collaboration online, and I could not find any pictures or posts of people owning these merch, aside from the ones that were took in the aforementioned Frieze Art Fair, like the ones below:

Source: Wonderland Magazine

More pictures from the art fair, including the last two can be found on this link. (I didn't want to include all photos of the event cause it'll make the post even more longer than it already is oops)

Anyways! I think this was a really interesting collaboration, and I wanted more EAH fans to know about it, cause again I feel that it's not really brought up much (and I can see why, there's not much info about it online) I hope this thread was worth the read :)

[omniscientwreck]

Tell me about your special little guy and his philosophy :3

Thank you so much for asking I've literally been thinking about this all day! The special little guy in question is Xaryl and he's a Knowledge Domain cleric I play in a game with some mutuals (oops!all party this probably isn't gonna contain serious spoilers for Xaryl but it isn't all stuff that he's fully laid out in campaign so i'm putting it under a cut. Do with that what you will) (sorry there's a lot, I created my own hyperfixation when I created Xaryl and I'm incapable of speaking about him briefly)

So this question is in regards to the ideas expressed in this post about the Luxon and the part about the Luxon that always stood out to me is the questions of Identity and how does one Know themself.

So Xaryl is a reader and a philosopher. He was isolated from his family as a teenager and taken away from most peer interaction his age to go assume a role in the Den he didn't want or ask for. His anamnesis didn't go correctly and his memories of his previous life are fragmented and have plagued him his entire life. He's hidden himself away and acted purely out of self preservation for decades, as long as he'd been with the dens.

So Xaryl's thoughts are essentially this: we cannot know ourselves devoid of each other. People (humanoids) are social creatures, we form groups and alliances and forge collective identities on various scopes (for example, being a Communist, being a nurse, being a particular person's brother, being a part of a certain family) and those add to, and inform our identites.

Further, we have different identites to and around different people. Then the question becomes something more like: which version of me is real? is every version of me real? do I have one identity or do I have many? does my identity exist as mine or is it a way for others to interpret me?

So with the Luxon, it created the primordials and then they were lost to the darkness as they warred within themselves, and so it scattered itself, hoping that eventually life would be refined and those that were bound to its light would live and live again and teach it about itself. It went dormant after that, it doesn't talk, so Luxon worshippers are left to determine "who am I and why am I?" for a being that hasn't really had any contact with it's followers.

So like, through all of this, lonely lost little Xaryl determines, in the middle of 80 years of isolating himself for his safety, that our purpose, and the Luxon's in turn, is to be known and to know. He works his way around to community and love as the meanings of life, and things to aspire to (despite not having those things for much of his life) so the way he prays turns into becoming the Luxon's friend. For decades instead of like "praying" he told the Luxon stories about his life, he tried to send it sensations of flavour or the smell of rain on cobblestone, or the sound and feeling of music. And he fought with the Luxon in his mind and said things he regretted in anger. He formed this totally one sided (until very recently but that's game canon) friendship and relationship and identity based entirely on something that, if he didn't literally get clerical powers from it, he might think existed only in his mind. So what does that make him? Xaryl, friend of the Luxon? Does that make it his friend in return? Is the true answer to "Who am I?" contained in the viewpoint of a single person? Is it responsible for the things its followers have done in its absence and silence? Is that its identity? What about the other side of the world, where surely there must be beacons? Do the people there think the same things? Could the same being's beacons elicit two completely different and opposed schools of worship? Much to consider.

Sorry this isn't as coherent as I'd like it to be and also sorry it's so long but thaaaaaaank you for asking I had a very tiring work day and it's nice to just talk about my oc's :3