#very constructive use of my time
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happens every time 😔
#this was based off a very specific toxic shock psychosurgery tilt the scales run#where i was using blind mines for my daily#what kept happening was that id start the puzzle#then someone (usually coyle) would show up while i was looking and id have to hide or run#and when i finally lose them id hear WARNING: GAS and id have to hide aGAIN#and by the time gas was over id have like ten seconds left on the box and have to run out to avoid getting shocked and/or coyled#repeat ad infinitum#i think of this run every time im back in that one office way in the back of the construction side. i can point out the very same desk.#my art#outlast trials#outlast#leland coyle#outlast reagent#reagent atlas
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swam the most beautiful swim of my life today ✨
#this water. when i tell you i went insane for it.#on our hike there was a construction site high up in the mountains where several times#very heavy machinery drove past us as we were on a dusty dirt road with a steep incline in the scorching sun#so we were just. caked in dust stuck to us by sweat by the time we got down again#my brother said we were tarred and feathered#the lake was heaven ten degrees cold and PERFECT babeeey#photo
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i have no idea where the compulsion to giver her a pokemon came from ??? but her and her minccino gotta go make sure her husband stays safe.
#my characters#pkmn#honestly very shocked she got so many notes yesterday and yes she has a white cat#why did i feel the need to give her a pokemon ?? idk!#but also fun fact i cant recall if i mentioned in tags yet#is she really does just worry about how nice her husband is bc while hes recovering#she has to say mmmm maybe we DONT call an electrician over while im at work and cant be here for you#and hes like well why not ?? do you think the electrician is going to kidnap me????#and shes like not really but you ARE really gullible and suffering a head injury where you space out at times and i dont want#to leave you here with a stranger ok#and the husband is just like you know what thats actually so valid i am really gullible i might be tricked into something#and just accepts it ! hes like YEAH ! i AM easy to convince of things! my wife is so cool and smart and looking out for us#but its also why he realizes while hes at home recovering there are ONLINE COURSES he can take#and so he starts to look online and figures out how to fix the flickering himself and gets a couple online courses under his belt#and he uses his engineering and construction knowledge to help him figure out how to build death contraptions#and so his wife is like sweetheart why dont you try to do something with that as a job? you have the ability#and hes like yeah but what do i put on a resume?#i used free online lectures to fix lights in my bathroom and build really cool ways to die? trust me? ive died a lot?#and shes just yeah ok fair that is a bit hard to convince people you know what youre doing when you do it to die#loving wife loves her loving husband and together they go die a lot now ft a cute lil pokeman
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hmmmm "i will" by mitski as a loumand song.... armand both pre- and post-SF trying to convince himself he's doing the right thing, he's doing this for louis, he's doing this for them......
armand who considers himself fundamentally unlovable outside of his utility to a partner...... for whom love and servitude and ownership and debt are all mixed up in ways informed by centuries of abuse
who is applying what little he has received in the way of love (both real and perceived) to his current relationships, but who has never felt loved without being owned, who has never once even considered that Respecting Boundaries is an important part of loving somebody, who is used to his lover being his owner being his maker being his god, and who applies all that to his relationship with louis because it's the first time he is suddenly in the dominant position in a relationship and he is Not equipped to handle that in any way even approaching a healthy relationship
"i will see your body bare and still i will live here" considering that the highest form of devotion because surely only somebody who truly loves him could stomach to see him undone, to see him brought low, even if they were the one to undo him. is it not the most honest expression of his adoration for louis to see him brought low and rebuild him ?
"and all the quiet nights you bear, seal them up with care / no one needs to know they're there, for i will hold them for you" armand who is intimately familiar with the ways that memory can hurt you, who is desperately trying to pretend that forgetting is the same as moving on, who is taking on all the burden of this relationship and still louis is so ungrateful, how dare he accuse armand of doing this for his own benefit when it was all for louis, when armand has stayed awake a thousand days to soothe his nightmares, smooth over the edges of every hurtful recollection, when armand bears louis's traumas for him, how dare he—
"there's no need to be brave / while you sleep, i'll be scared / so by the time you wake, i'll be brave" armand who is building up an increasingly fragile house of cards, who is layering lies and adjustments and changes and more lies over each other, knowing that it's not sustainable, knowing that with every passing day it becomes harder to tell the truth, knowing that this will collapse eventually and the fallout is only growing. and then louis wakes up and everything is fine, darling, don't you even worry about it
(can you tell him that i'm so normal about him)
#lmaster37 posts#iwtv#interview with the vampire#iwtv spoilers#interview with the vampire spoilers#the vampire armand#obv this is like heavily filtered through armand's self-perception#for the record while i Do Not claim that this is ACCURATE to show!armand#i do think that it is at minimum more interesting to consider his actions through the lens of him genuinely caring for louis#if in a toxic and often self-serving way#(self-serving being. a very broad term here. consider that louis is a useful prop in armand's perfomance of elaborate self-destruction)#(as somebody with a tendency to romanticise their own mental illness that's an impulse i understand all too well)#(it's the constructing a situation so awful for everybody involved that surely at some point nobody could fault you for giving up. for me)#idk like i've seen people dismiss all of armand's more tender moments as part of The Scheme#and while i'm obv not gonna claim that that's a Wrong reading#i do think it's kinda. uninteresting. okay so everything he ever said was a lie. what's left of the character then ?#hmm still salty about 2x8 sorry. cool twist but like what does that actually mean for the character#idk i'm having a hard time reconciling 2x8 armand with the rest of iwtv armand#equal odds whether that's a weakness on the show's part or my unwillingness to reconsider a Character I Like in a negative light :shrug:#once again it appears i am incapable of not rambling in tags
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2024 reads / storygraph
Asunder
slow-paced high fantasy
a woman who has a contract with an eldritch entity allowing her to see the dead & survives by taking various jobs
when a job searching for stranded smugglers in a cave goes wrong, she ends up with the soul of a dying stranger bound to her shadow
along with a scholar and her old childhood friend, they travel to his home country to find a way to unbind him and save them both
dark fantasy world with gods, demonic entities, arcane magic, and semi-sentient beasts used as transport
#asunder#kerstin hall#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#okay SUPER fascinating worldbuilding with some very visceral creatures and biological constructs and interesting magic systems.#many things I like. A great cast of characters. Honestly I could read tons more stories set in this world.#it’s very slow building and meandering narratively; focusing on the complex journey of the main character#didn’t love the audio narration tbh - it felt like some lines are read with the wrong emphasis or tone? but I got used to it after a while#So this has one of my absolute favourite tropes (bodysharing.) unfortunately it turns it into a romance which is. well.#it just doesn’t hit the same if you make it romantic!! so that kinda made it change traintracks from being on a direct line to#potentially 5 stars to a whole different station where i do not live. lol.#I SUPPOSE it’s a well developed relationship and I’d prefer romances more like that than instalove I guess.#I did love their dynamic; too; but suddenly realising it was romantic threw me for a loop. I had put him in the annoying dad category.#I do also feel like we didn’t get quite enough of him as an individual person and characterisation - which obviously makes sense to an#extent; but I felt like I only got to see more of him in the brief time around his father.#Also he was surprisingly chill and nice to her immediately considering he was essentially her hostage???#Anyway I did enjoy a lot of it; it just suffers the unfortunate tragedy of#[literally my favourite thing made for me] [turns that thing into literally my least favourite thing i hate]#but also -random dude you’re bound to being overly protective and considerate despite barely knowing you (platonic/familial vibe) - yeah!#random dude you’re bound to being overly protective and considerate despite barely knowing you (romantic) ehhhh…idk.....#(to me personally. i'm sure people enjoy that. whatever)
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Kia is staying with my partner while I'm abroad on holiday and she's not best pleased, poor baby. She's safe, she's well cared for, she's with someone she knows and likes, and she's getting attention, she's just,,, in a weird place without me, and not really impressed about it.


She's starting to chill out and settle in though! Slowly.
Ft @rinnaden
#kiadanta#my cats#ragdoll#cat#my poor silly pigeon#doesn't help that she can smell partner's cats all over the place and hear them in the rest of the house#they're still in early stages of intro to each other so#the presence of other cats in general gets Kia very on edge#stressed animal#shes doing better now though#honestly her getting used to spending time near them or in places that smell like them is very good groundwork for their eventual intros#so this is actual constructive displeased cat#cat intros nearly always involve some cat displeasure. just how cats be
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I didn't want to say anything because I'm still refurbrishing my f/o list and it's not done by a long shot, but two big announcements. One, I have moved Mojo Jojo up to being a main f/o. On the same level as Jamie. This is a bit of a big deal to me because no f/o has EVER been on the same level as Jamie, and even if I know no f/o will ever be like him, I can't deny that Mojo has definitely become very very close to my heart 🥺💖🥺💖🥺💖 So he's officially my second EVER main f/o!! Yayyyy 👏💖👏💖👏💖
Second off, a new f/o has joined the ranks! I'm sure you noticed over the past few days I've been posting about a certain villainous penguin... well, he's now an official f/o! >0< I couldn't help myself I just really like him! And I want to get more self indulgent this year, so. Yeah. Feathers is now an f/o :3 💖💖💖💖
#ruby rambles#💜: loving you's a felony#💜: jailbirds of a feather#💎.crsh#yayyyyy first time using feathers' tag 💖💖💖💖#but yeah like i said my list is very much still under construction so its a little messy right now 😭#but there are quite a few other big changes on there too 💖#it still feels weird cuz my autism doesnt like change but i'll get used to it 👉👈#ok i gotta go get ready for work love u all bye 💖💖💖
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Not really into IRL AUs but if Crocodile existed in our world he would be running a sand mafia and you can't convince me otherwise
#Moon posting#OP Meta#Sand is a non-renewable resource that can be used for a variety of things (from tech to construction depending on the type of sand)#Like yeah you could just make him some vague mob boss but where's the fun in that. Why not make him a Very Specific kinda mob boss#It's just too on-the-nose to pass up on#Option B would be him running an illegal DIY HRT ring (because t without a perscription is an illegal substance and trans healthcare sucks)#Yes you may want to argue that should be Ivankov's job. My argument is that Iva-chan is too busy doing political activism and causing riots#-to have time to smuggle hormones and distribute them. They just know how to get people The Stuff They Want when the healthcare system suck
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[[PETTY INCONSEQUENTIAL COMPLAINT GO]]
One thing that never fails to grind my gears re: other people (or let's be honest, cis men) in mmo games is that I will be out here playing the most feral big-fanged beefy cat mommy and everyone I interact with will still refer to me as he/him by default
listen I get that y'all like to play lizardgirls in swimsuits and more power to you I don't judge but is it really that outlandish to expect that if I don't know, the character's sex is likely to match the player's (or even if it didn't, my character is a woman!! and you're talking to her!! if I hear one more 'my good sir' I will riot*)? How about y'all get a lot more comfortable with the concept of being misgendered in a videogame and maybe you'll realize other people exist smh
*note that if I point out I'm a woman it's always accepted no problem I just wish I didn't have to choose between asserting my gender or tolerating being misgendered in every other interaction
#a petty move would be for me to start using she/her for all characters but it's not like that would actually be constructive in any way#I'm just very minorly peeved by constantly being someone's bro#(to clarify I'm perfectly fine and in fact even vibe with bro/dude/guy/whatever but i need you to know that i am in fact a woman first)#ffxiv#ironically this is also what makes it clear to me that i tragically remain 100% cis#every time i get he/him'd i have to roll my eyes#this could be super affirming for transmascs i imagine but it would happen for all the wrong reasons
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As someone who has lived in the south where the water trough is anywhere from mildly annoying to actively terrifying, who has lived on a fairly decently sized island where it is indeed absolutely terrifying to be cut off from the mainland suddenly with little to no help from the government for an extended period of time--
After No Man's Land and all the issues that arose then, I'd like to propose the new way of interring their dead would be mausoleums. Possibly especially with Gotham canonically existing on a system of caves. An island made of caves on the East Coast that gets battered by hurricanes almost every year is just asking to get sunk a la Atlantis but its fucking Gotham and i think the Gothamites would raise it from the sea floor again out of sheer spite.
But with mausoleums you:
Dont have your son crawling six feet through packed dirt after inexplicably coming back to life
Dont have long buried coffins and corpses getting flooded/shaken/otherwise disturbed and shunted into the water system/streets/underground reservoirs (or Lazarus Pits, since there's one of those down there too, as if Gotham didn't have enough things wrong with it)
Continues the Gotham aesthetic
Have more places for various characters to have a private mental breakdown in
Have more places for various characters to find ominous warnings etched or graffiti'd on the walls
Have more places for things much older than the mausoleums have been En Vogue™ for to inexplicably appear and send shivers down the spine
The Gothamites are very firm about not really being part of the US. The US kind of looks at the South like we're really fucking strange, and the South looks at New Orleans like they've taken the South and concentrated it, carbonated it, and shook it really hard.
I want the same vibes for Gotham. This is their home. They are weird and stubborn to a fault and everything is on fire and the government is corrupt and the people aren't always good but nobody else understands. No one else ever could. Who else has seen the lights for rescue appear on the horizon only to see the light of death on the waters, ensuring no help would ever come? They are resourceful and violent and resentful but the gods won't help you if you cross one of their own.
#the stoneworkers built Gotham#if it existed in reality itd be a marvel of nature's construction#if No Man's Land went as it did it'd be the metalworkers and stone masons to build the city back up#and with the earthquake everyone would be utterly terrified to dig into the ground. not after having to excavate the subways.#Jason comes back to Gotham and it has Changed.#in the scant year(s?) between No Man's Land and Jason's return there are buildings gone and buildings entirely new#but look like they're a century old. because the stonemasons and metalworkers had to work with what they had.#and what they had was ruins and a lot of them had to work together to piece metal and stone together to make something unshakeable#gotham is the embodiment of the riches and ruins that was the 1920s in America and a lot of the architecture of the time#was either very practical or very maximalist#the Chrysler building in NYC was built in that era and is a shining example of both#so please imagine with me: cobbled stone hewn into fitted shapes‚ held together with radial metal lines curves.#i think later down the line Gotham U would be an architectural and civil engineering powerhouse#Gotham's architecture would be akin to that of a bunker. unshakeable. wind resistant. blast resistant.#composed of materials that make it easy to wipe everything down after a flood and continue on.#after Katrina my centuries old school literally mopped the walls and ushered us back in inside of two weeks#my family and i had been rescued from our island only days prior#shh ruby world building is not always for the tags
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Listening to Vivaldi's cello concerto in g minor while planning my next therapy appointment because I want to work on time management (I am not studying for my final that is tomorrow)
#my therapist is soo done hearing about my mum cus the way she sat straight up when i actually started talking about everything else.#I told her i need to distance myself from a victim identity and thats why i need to stop talking abt my mum bc theres so much i need to take#accountability for looool#for like half a year all ive talked abt is transitioning and my mum basically. like i need to use this very expensive time for more#constructive things theres si much i have ti work on#the schedule is kind of a joke but also#i do need to stop myself from going on tangents#last time she was like “i have no idea what youre talking about”#sjsjdkdkcjfkpkcbskMdb#to be fair neither do i girl#it's all stuff ive never told anyone else#and barely even thought about#so it'll probably look pretty ugly being brought to the surface
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baru cormorant seems to me to be a series that suffers miserably for me having read machineries of empire first. unfortunately everything BC is doing strikes me as something MoE did better and more believably and with much a greater and more grounded eye for how systems, complex system interaction, and oppression like. work
#red rambles#also i don't like the writing very much so I'm not having as much fun with it as i did with MoE#but YHL straight up writes with the exact approach and methodology *i* write - the narrative frame is extremely close. the lines are punchy#the description is sparse the info we are delivered is typically in short wacky one-off chunks that tell us not only something about the#world but something about the narrator who is also the main character whose head we're in#the timing. so on and so forth#someone told me that seth dickinson is transfem but i cant find her (?) pronouns anywhere so if anyone knows where to see them i'd#appreciate a link if only to complain that i don't like her (?) writing that much in comparison because it is a lot less.... rewardingly#entertaining i suppose. when compared to the way yoon ha lee structures his. there are much fewer twists#and of course the major huge twist of Baru Cormorant was hidden from the reader which i just think is *bad form* when it comes to intrigue!#when yhl will lay all the moving pieces of the plot before you openly and say 'hey. isn't that a funny side tangent. anyway look to your#left; something is exploding' and then as it keeps unfolding he goes 'and here in small scale is how it is being used! isn't that#interesting to see how these pieces move? now look to your right; something is exploding' and then at the very end it all comes perfectly#together#the way i felt around the middle/end of Raven Strategem when i understood the spy network the first time is something that BC cannot do#you aren't trusted with the pieces and you don't get to play the game of understanding that you weren't *told* literally everything#i'm reading monster baru cormorant today as i go about my errands and I kinda don't think it's what i want because i want it to be the kind#of working awful poisoned bloodstained empire as the hexarchate and i want it to be a complex contradictory overlapping system like the#hexarchate's army and i want the banal cruelty of perfectly decent people condemning strangers to awful awful bloody deaths because they're#'not like us' instead of the petrified horror *everyone* has of the Social Contagion Agents because i just do not BUY the construction of#dickinson's Social Hygiene Offices and their place in the world#but i cant just read the MoE books any more. i'll get bored. i'm already kind of bored of reading them over and over
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Did you expect Rescuing Rusty in 2023??? (RR is @zeejax‘s ♥) (Patreon)
Trick question! Even I wasn’t expecting Rescuing Rusty, but since it was up next on my fics to vet for construction, I had to give it a reread!
Didn’t it turn out lovely 💕 There’s not a lot of sky-related imagery in RR, but I couldn’t not go with this colour - it’s an even richer rust colour IRL :D
The spine ended up being big enough that I was able to sneak in two bookmarks! One for Zoom (the black) and one for Rusty (the red)
Even though they sit separately, Rusty’s still crosses over Zoom’s hehe ♥
#My art#Rescuing Rusty#Rusty#Zoom#They get a digital doodle since I was rereading while in the digital warmup mindset haha#They just barely snuck in! Good for them ♥ They are still good lads :)#Nowadays the miasma of positive feelings has gotten very fuzzy and indistinct but boy do I still remember how Big those feelings were lol#NPG good! EX good! NPG and EX being friends good!!#Rescuing Rusty is charming as always :) It's a snuggle-up kind of fic I just feel cozy thinking about and reading it ♪#It's funny as well since I started rereading before picking out the cover - looking for which one would be the most thematic lol#And I ended up just reading a few chapters all at once 'cause I was having a good time with it! Oops reading lol#It was also an experiment >:3c Since out home printer is kinda ehhhh currently - the poor old thing haha - I took a trip to the library#Our local library allows up to 10 free greyscale prints a day so ♪ Slowly but surely I'd walk to the library and come back 10 pages richer#I've figured out how to take books out of the library and not have to return them! Libraries hate this one weird trick!#Lol ♪#So yeah :D Other than the cover and the first page (since I hadn't figured if the library could use the Minecraft font yet - they can!)#This is a ''free'' printed book :D I mean - other than walking to and from the library and construction and ribbons lol#The guts of the book were paid with taxes lol ♫#It was well worth it :) It's good to walk!#And I am happy to have it physically :D
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Hi, sorry for this but you are a writer, so umm.. I was hoping you could give me some tips/advice on how to write?
tbh the way I got into writing is a bit insane, but I do have some advice that can help. gonna put it under a cut just because it got kinda long
honest to god, one of the best pieces of advice is something you're already doing because reading can genuinely help you with becoming a better writer. stepping outside of your usual genres or authors can help expand your viewpoint and introduce you to more narrative styles so you can play around and see what works for you. eg. if you mostly read first person, give second person a shot. or if you're an omniscient third person, try limited third person. or even retrospective first person, because i often see people complain about first person pov when it's married with a present tense story. if you have a first person narrator talking about events in the past as if talking to you, or a journal it often takes an entirely different angle and it's something I've played with in Homestuck fics because that fandom tends to be more open to narrative experimentation. Writing is honestly a lot of looking at stuff you like (much like art) and smooshing it all together. Personally, I've gotten a lot of my writing style from stuff like The Locked Tomb, admittedly Lovecraft was foundational (but this is a great example of why to always remain critical considering his bullshit), so was Homestuck and Rick Riordan's stuff. I'm never trying to copy them wholesale, but I am looking at aspects I like - such as Riordan's humor intertwining with the narrative and narration, or the deeply unreliable narrators that Muir writes, or even how Homestuck balances purple prose with gut wrenching conciseness when it counts. A lot of modern day fast food fiction takes out a lot of the stuff that actually builds a story - pacing, playing with narration and technical writing - so you need to be conscious of what you're looking for in things. Often more established authors get to do weirder stuff than new authors, but don't discredit new ones because that would be leaving out folks like Xiran Jay Zhao and their phenomenal prose.
Another thing that helps greatly is reading writing critique. Video essays on books or even more critical thought pieces on writing, tropes, etc. can help you learn more about why something works. Lots of different channels on YouTube dedicated to dissecting media, absolutely recommend stuff like Hello Future Me, Overly Sarcastic Productions (real world ties + mythology, great basis to build things on), Zoe Bee (writer + commentary), Nerdwriter1 (media analysis + commentary), Just Write, and Tale Foundry. For adjacent suggestions that can help build up alternate perspectives that aren't directly about writing but are about critical thinking with stories (which is frankly an important skill to have), I definitely recommend Princess Weekes, Accented Cinema, Now You See It, Dominic Noble, The Storyteller, and Pop Culture Detective. A lot of this is discussing film (save Dominic Noble, who also talks about books a Lot), but the core essence of storytelling is helpful regardless of what angle it comes in - be it video game, movie, tv, or book reviews and analyses.
Actual writing. Varies on the person on if they do outlines or not and how, but I still recommend trying to do an outline when you're first starting out. One habit to immediately knock yourself out of is writing things chronologically. If you're working on a big piece and have more energy to write something in the middle? Put that in a new doc and leave a placeholder for where you're at. Legitimately, getting words on the paper is more important than those words being good. Because you can always come back and edit things to make sense.
Always edit what you write. I hate the "no beta we die like real men" attitude because people will dunk on editing but then praise stories for having "firm and satisfying" connections which can only really be built through editing. Your first draft is your rough idea. Your second one is when you read through and have it make sense. Three is making that make sense, and maybe 4 is more just grammar and spelling errors. Edit as many times necessary to make sure you like it.
Always work in broad strokes, then move in finer like with anything. Do a general idea for a story, then your main story beats, then how you connect them together, and then the nitty gritty of each. Keep lots of notes - do not rely on your head solely for everything - and just also be willing to let things go if they change.
What I tend to do when I write is I want a good flow. I often get that from reading my writing out loud to hear how it sounds, but I'm looking for a good beat to read along. Because even if the sentence is grammatically correct and structurally sound, it may not be very interesting to read. Like you could say someone feigned a polite expression to not let the other person know that they didn't feel comfortable with a topic, or you could go the angle I went with recently of "she painted herself an interested expression to wear as dread began to gnaw at her gut." Sometimes the more colorful or out there the language is, the better it sounds when you read it. Like instead of saying "that's just how things go for them" you could say, "but Fate had a funny way of making her disdain known for (X character)". And this is where reading other peoples' work comes in real handy because you can get a lot of examples of how people write things.
I also try and reflect themes of the story into the writing itself, like this section of a draft:
Still nothing. Seemed he wasn’t going to bother with a glass, instead just ripping the top off of some bottle of gin and tipping it back with little regard for himself. Still that chronometer ticked on; still that taught tension like another arrow had been drawn. A million and more things flooded Ysayle’s mind, itching to loose them at Estinien, yet found herself stuck in indecision as she stared daggers into him - ever her opposite as he just seemed despondent. The gin bottle hit the extended shelf loudly; one hand a fist around the bottle, the other balled up on the surface - knuckles as white as bone. Still, Estinien said naught. Still, the chronometer ticked on. Still, Ysayle’s heart roared in her ears - poisonous words damming up her throat.
The theme of this story is avoiding the mistakes of the past. How things often can wind up cyclical, and the goal is to break from those cycles and repeats. So naturally, several points of the narration itself repeat itself. This isn't standard writing style, but it gets that point across by repeating "Still" as the scene crawls on. I also use a lot of alliteration in my writing because I personally find it fun? So "a maddening matter made most malign", for example.
It also helps to change up how you write or what descriptors you use based on the character whose head you're in, even if it's third person. Third person can have a voice and I often use it to speak aloud a character's thoughts instead of relying on italicized dialogue-thoughts. It makes the dialogue-thoughts appearing hit more when they do instead of just having to be subjected to internal ramblings constantly. Like in this fic I just published:
“...Can we talk about it on the morn?” “What for?” You don’t know what it is you ask of me. “Tired,” Estinien said with a shrug. “We’ve morning patrol, remember?”
Compared to this fic:
“Yes, confusingly.” Her tone was flat as she leaned once again on Surkukteni’s shoulder, thankfully on the uninjured side. “I fear I may have been wrong, though I truly doubt it. To deny me twice, then throw a fit? I wonder — why didn’t you go through with it?” Not even Surkukteni had that answer. For the umpteenth time during that conversation, she refused to look at Her Darkness. That desire — twisted and poisoned as it was — was one that still surfaced from time to time, yet like clockwork made her ill and was banished from her thoughts. Why was that? She felt scorned back then, wishing the universe would correct this error in sparing him but taking Ysayle — but was she not the one who helped save him? Who helped tear those eyes from his armor? She easily could — and had previously — bluffed that it was to destroy the eyes and be rid of the threat, but given her hesitancy now? Why?
All of Surkukteni's thoughts are condensed into the narration so that I can separate out her thought dialogue from idle musings since she - specifically - has a connection with something that can talk telepathically. This thing comments on the literal narration of the story, so when she's directly addressing this thing it's thought-dialogue. But her actual thoughts become narration to avoid spending too much time with that, as I find it's better used sparingly.
Motivation for writing is probably the hardest thing, and best I can advise is to get really into critiquing the stuff you like because you wind up finding a lot of material in fix-it stuff, or just wanting to see more of stuff like you. It's part of what drives my xiv stuff due to how they treat female characters, and I really just wanna see more sapphic bi4bi. So considering it's something I've been stuck in for a very long time now and really like the ambient lore and wish it would do better, it's fueling my desire to write. And from there, there are so many other angles to take - like building ocs, building lore. Finding a sandbox is genuinely one of the best ways to do it. Again, like. You'd be surprised at how much is there because of spite. LOTR has Eowyn because Tolkien didn't like that the "can be killed by no man" thing in Macbeth was resolved with a character born by c-section, so he instead wrote Eowyn, the woman who killed the Witch-King of Angmar. C.S. Lewis didn't like the fact that Tolkien believed that modern technology - or slightly less modern technology - didn't believe in fantasy and he explicitly cited lampposts. And this is why there's just a random light post in the middle of nowhere in the Narnia books.
Critique is good and healthy. I'm critical with the stuff I like and my own things so I can work on them and myself. It's fine to like something that you don't wholly agree with, especially if you're using it to inform how you build on it or build your own things. Like I dunno, I looked at Dante from Devil May Cry and went "what if he was trans" and now I've got Rhombi, a character who has stepped really far away from the OG Dante mould, but you can still see hints of it as I used what I wanted to see out of DMC to build this bisexual disaster of a guy. I was disappointed by Elsword not really committing to some of their character concepts, so I kinda just took Eve (and admittedly Add) and made them into Celes and Neilos and took them to their logical conclusions. All three of them were originally fantrolls at some point, so most of the heavy lifting was done when I was back in Homestuck and all I had to do was scrub the barcodes off of them to build them up in an original verse.
Chemistry is also crucial. If characters aren't vibing, move on. Do not force it. Good chemistry can save a bad story (eg. FFXV) and bad chemistry can ruin a good story. Often it's the characters that drive a story so you need to do a lot of plotting and planning. Most writing is honestly just planning before putting the words down.
And I'm very much so rambling by now but my main points are these (+ others I'm realizing while typing):
Plot a Lot and keep lots of notes, and also organize those notes. The contents don't have to be pretty, but you'll thank yourself in advance if you at least sort them by core idea
Getting words down is more important than getting them down correctly. You can always come back and edit it when you have an idea of how to make it work
You can always place a [insert scene here] tag so you can keep your flow and don't get caught on something.
You also don't have to write chronologically - you wanna write the big confession scene before the intro? do it! just jump right into it!
also don't be afraid to delete stuff or remove it from your draft. save things for later to see if they work elsewhere, because maybe it could be a better spinoff.
dont listen to the advice of "if it really matters, you'll remember it in the morning" that advice was given by neurotypicals who don't have memory issues. make notes of EVERYTHING and then delete the ones that don't work
sometimes writing by hand vs computer can really make a difference in how you think. handwriting is slower and makes you think about stuff, so you may want to keep journals for random snippets or ideas like how doodling is good for building up your habit of drawing
Outlines can help but how you outline is up to you. Try a few styles out and go with what works best.
I cannot stress enough that having something like a marker board to write out your broad stroke story ideas is really really nice
Broad strokes first, then narrow it further and further down. Don't get wrapped up in the nitty gritty details
Chemistry is crucial and can often save a piece you're not fully feeling.
Read your stuff out loud while editing because it can help point out stuff that's not jiving! I find it helps a lot with dialogue
Read a lot. Listen to critique. Be more critical. Also don't limit your idea of stories to just books - expand the media you consume and you'll find really interesting stories that can help with yours
Don't be afraid to use tropes, but also don't super rely on them to where you're just checking off boxes instead of coming up with natural scenarios built on chemistry (eg. having the nerdy goth girl is fine, but the way the trope ends in most media ("fixing" her or just having her be a quirky cynical critic) may not fit with your story and it may be better to see how the story plays out rather than forcing it into something it's not)
Iron Widow is a good example here: the relationship between Zetian and Yizhi is pre-established and comes off as sort of "boy next door" vibes, or at least the very dedicated childhood friend. It quickly becomes apparent that he's as much a co-conspirator in her plans as Shimin is. The guy can be ruthless when given the chance, and that's how Yizhi goes beyond the initial trope and defines himself outside of it. Same with the contextualization of Shimin's seeming "aggression" as the "bad boy" and figuring out where that problem/persona actually stems from, and then the shift of viewing it as less aggression and more retaliation and self preservation.
Find something you do really want to write about, like filling a void in a piece of media you like or doing a take on media that made you mad or disappointed. Jane Eyre is technically fanfiction because the author wanted to see more of Jane and didn't get that. The Divine Comedy is self insert fanfiction of Dante Alighieri as he does worldbuilding with Christian mythos regarding heaven and hell. The Riordan verse is his interest in mythology crossed with a desire to give his son a protag that was like him (specifically ADHD and dyslexic), which then became wanting to let kids see themselves in the different halfbloods in the series.
There's a lot of ways you can get started writing, but the best way is to just write goofy stuff for yourself. Get out stuff that may look bad at first, but you go back and read it and critique it. Just getting yourself into the habit of writing helps a lot, because again: it matters less about the quality, and more getting it on the page and actually having something. You can always fine-tune writing, after all.
My first FFXIV fic isn't actually even published. It was just me writing something rambly about my Warrior of Light when I was starting to figure her character out. It looks nothing like what I'm doing now in part because that fanfiction became a launching point for me to work on others. I've got a lot of drafts that will never see the light of day because these were proto-concepts that became the stuff I wound up publishing. It's fine to have drafts that remain drafts because you can take that as practice, and practice is good. Anything that you write has value because you can use it to let your technical writing skills mature.
Also, don't be afraid to look for help. There are beta services on tumblr (or at least used to be when I was a teenager), plenty of writing guides or places set up to ask questions, plenty of youtubers that give prompts for you to work with. The hardest part is always getting started. But once you get past the awkwardness of the start, everything just falls into place and gets easier the longer you go at it.
You definitely have the desire for it because I've seen your very deep love of literature through the Bi-Library, so you can definitely become a strong writer if you put your mind to it 🫶 Find something to fix or address, and that usually is what gets the ball rolling. Worldbuilding is fun and can lead to something, but you can't have a well built world without a story to explore it.
Characters drive story, story is how you explore themes and the world itself, and the world itself is built on your experiences and interests. Embrace the fact that this is coming from your lens and experiences, because no media is truly void of the author and its other creators. Embrace that fact and use it as an extension of yourself. But really, just write. Literally anything. Just get into the habit of writing, and it'll progress from there!
#original#asks#answered#bisexual-coala#writing tips#long post#this is very rambly but getting into writing isnt the most straightforward thing#a lot of the time it really is just finding something that clicks and not caring about what goes on the page for the first draft#ive been writing fanfiction for...over a decade now? + a lot of rp (also over a decade) and now some p serious original stuff#my fanfiction has also gotten way more involved than it used to be#genuinely i got started writing by keeping a lot of journals and writing every idea i had even if im now embarrassed by it#what matters is just getting into the habit first and then looking at your stuff more critically once the habit is formed#it's hard to build a habit if you're immediately critical#but it's hard to maintain a habit or hobby if you're not - especially if you feel you can build on something#if you do feel it you oughta pursue it and see where it takes you#perfectly fine to not be critical with hobbies but being Constructively critical is how you improve and mature#constructive is key here. because being down on your own writing or being self deprecating is how you lose a hobby#like let's say you don't like your dialogue#go read scripts or books of stuff you like the dialogue from. analyze why they work in contrast to why you feel like yours doesnt work#maybe someone else has a solution for why it feels off#sometimes it's just as simple as taking a step back and looking at it as a whole or even just sleeping on it and coming back w fresh eyes#always approach something you don't like about your work with the attitude of ''how can i improve so i do like it''#like ''i need to be better at fight scenes. ill be sure to include more in my next piece to focus on it and maybe read some action books''#lotta ways to do it!! theres no one right way just a way that fits best for you!!!#just absolutely ignore the ''if it's a good idea you'll remember it in the morning'' stuff.#it doesn't account for people w memory issues and will screw you over#you do not have to wait until you're good at writing to start working on something. you need something to work on to improve#you can always come back to an idea as many times as you need as you grow as a writer#so just write until you build a habit and base style then analyze and move from there#fanfic is honestly really good for practicing style and technique - the characters and world are already ther so why not use em?
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i have to use copilot and midjourney for my homework this week. i feel like im betraying my values bro
#for context. this is for education on AI and informing us so we can constructively add to the conversation about its usage#which is really cool and i really respect our prof for taking the time to teach us about these things#on the other hand. i have managed to avoid using this crap for so long and hoped i would never have to and now im cranky asjfhd#which i suppose that attitude is against the lesson shes trying to teach. and i acknowledge that. however still cranky#and i have to write an unbiased report on my experience using it which will be VERY hard for me (little hater 100)#but i will try.#🔨
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Being bilingual is great bc I can justify watching the same 6 hours of content for the third time in 10 days to see how they translated the dialogue <3
#ok jokes aside I am actually very inchrested#I checked out the subtitles on my. first two . watches but just for the parts#where they were talking about characters using they/them#(they did a phenomenal job of constructing sentences in a way that omitted gendered language#while making it sound natural)#NOT an easy thing to do in russian and I am very impressed#not even like. oh well Most of the time#as far as I can tell beelezebub for example doesn't get gendered even once#(plus other characters too)#now I'm gonna see how they did the rest of the dialogue#I will probably not like it. but that is bc I am particular about my wording#and I am also not a professional translator#we will see
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