#version of egbert!! :D

[shutupeiffel]

why are you putting on my dash people named egbert and dob should I be worried

They're characters from a D&D show that was originally intended to just be a one off joke game (a la TAZ) which unfortunately meant half the players involved put about two seconds thought into their characters names. By contrast, the other three party members are a pirate rogue named Corazon de Leon (later de Balleena), a tiefling warlock named Prudence, and an elf druid named Merilwen.

Dob's player literally once described his own character's name as "something that sounds like someone came up with it in a panic when asked for a name"

Anyway the campaign they are from ended up lasting over five years and is now having an Epic Final Season to say a temporary goodbye to the characters, and you should absolutely either watch the episodes on Youtube or listen to the audio only versions (with added commentary) wherever you prefer to listen to podcasts. It's an amazing show, and there's a magic seal called Seal Gaiman (so like, the names get better)

[mikeysagereblog]

-ˏˋ tour of my animal crossing: pocket camp world!! :D ˊˎ

: ̗̀➛ i've been playing the complete version for a little over a month or two (which i totally acquired legally *cough cough*) and i love it sm!!! i really like the stuff in the new years event, so i redecorated my camp/cabin with some of the items!! i'll probably change them seasonally, but here's what they look like right now/what items i used!!!

: ̗̀➛ below is my camp!!! i used all of the items from blanche's inn cookie for all of the items!!! i opened five cookies at first just to see what i'd get, and i decided to go ham on the inn idea!!! at my camp, i have apollo, (my camp caretaker!!!) jay, bam, eugene, and filbert!!! :D i wish players could interact with the inn's items like the villagers do smh :(

: ̗̀➛ next up, we have my cabin!!! i used chevre's serene furniture for most of the items, the wall is the plum-blossom shoji wall from the zen cafe wall and floor crafting collection, the kotatsu/pink table is from the outdoor-fun new years crafting collection, the oden/food on the table is from the piping hot food stalls collection, and the pink/green kaleidoscope carpet is from the kaleidoscope crafting collection!!! i decided to turn the cabin into a relaxing spa for my villagers!!! i haven't unlocked the second floor yet, but when the time comes i'll move the spa up!!! the villagers i have in my cabin atm are rosie, lily, goldie, and muffy!!! :3 again, i wish i could actually go into the bath like one of the villagers :( like wdym no bathtime?? :(

: ̗̀➛ bonus!! here's my camper's first floor!! the the pile of pillows and the couch are from the knitted set from the fishing tourney, the rug/green kitchenette/center table/carseats are my camper's default furniture, the golden trophy was from the last fishing tourney, the christmas-y kitchenette is from tutu's cookie-bear cookie, and the lamp next to the couch is from egbert's cozy cookie!!!

: ̗̀➛ the second floor of my camper... i wanted it to be a more babyish/agere-ish bedroom, but it looks a little barren :') the rocking goat/bookself/window-bed/crib/starry mobile-lamp next to the crib are from sherb's naptime cookie, the carpet is from pinky's regal cookie, and the more yellowy-starry lamp closest to the ladder/rocking goat is a toy-day star lamp from the last toy day event!!! i really want to improve this room tbh.... if anyone knows any cute agere items/babyish/childlike items in general, please lmk!!!

: ̗̀➛ i hope you like it!!! i still have lots of progress to get them to look how i want, but for now they look ok!!! i love this game it makes me feel so little ^_^ apollo is my fav!!!

[pesterloglog]

Arquiusprite, Jane Crocker, Roxy Lalonde, John Egbert, Rose Lalonde, Rosesprite, Jaspersprite

Act 6, page 7583-7588

ARQUIUSPRITE: 🕶️--> Abra cafiddling dabra you silly shootnerds

ARQUIUSPRITE: 🕶️--> My e%ceedingly STRONG work as the party's premier bodybuilding hacker is done

ARQUIUSPRITE: 🕶️--> Off I go

JANE: ...

ROXY: JANE!!!!!

ROXY: ur wake!

JANE: Roxy?????

JANE: U'r alive!

JANE: Er, you're!

ROXY: so are you!

ROXY: you were dead last time i saw you and also before i found u sleepin here but now ur awake and also alive!

JANE: Yeah!

JANE: You were dead too, because I...

JANE: But now you're??

JANE: Oh god, Roxy, I'm so sorry I,

JANE: I wasn't thinking straight when...

JANE: Please forgive me. :(

ROXY: aw janey you dont gotta worry about whatever sad incident that frowns about

ROXY: thats all water under a bridge from a reality i got no recollection of and therefore dont matter at all

ROXY: by which i mean......

ROXY: this reality here, so ok the reality is still KIND of relevant because we are literally inside of it atm

ROXY: but im new here!

ROXY: i came over to keep being roxy since the old one died or whatever thru hecka debacles

JANE: That... is quite an explanation!

JANE: Jeez, I missed you.

ROXY: cmere u extravagant bitch!!!

JANE: Hahah!

JANE: (Wait... what?)

JOHN: the hug pile doesn't stop from getting taller.

ROSE: ?

JOHN: the hug pile! there are more hugs, rose.

ROSE: I can see the hugs. I don't understand the pile thing.

JOHN: oh. don't you remember?

JOHN: a funny quote from one of dave's old comics!

ROSE: Ah. Yes, vaguely.

ROSE: It's been a long journey, John.

ROSE: I believe one of the most valuable lessons that comes with growing up is gaining the wisdom that gently informs you when it's time to retire a meme.

JOHN: heh...

JOHN: i guess i never earned that handy badge, or whatever.

JOHN: i like this, though. every time someone wakes up, or pops out of nowhere, it's fun times all over again.

JOHN: i feel like i should be playing reunion bingo.

JOHN: who will be next??

JOHN: my money is on the long awaited and insanely poignant reunion between me and casey the salamander.

ROSE: Surely you mean the dear Viceroy Bubbles Von Salamancer, right?

ROSE: And instead of you, you mean me.

ROSE: That's when the real tears will flow.

JOHN: what do you think she's up to?

ROSE: He.

JOHN: no, she is my beautiful daughter. :p

ROSESPRITE: Something tells me the good Viceroy has been busy.

ROSE: Oh?

ROSESPRITE: I sense he's been... scheming.

ROSESPRITE: Plotting.

ROSESPRITE: Biding his time.

ROSESPRITE: Accruing dark legions.

ROSE: That sure is a thing that would be dumb, if true.

ROSESPRITE: Yeah.

JOHN: hi nanna!

JOHN: jane, i mean.

JOHN: sorry, it's an easy mistake to make, because you're my nanna!

ROXY: lol

ROXY: real smooth shit john

JANE: Hello!

JANE: A pleasure to meet you, John. Or, poppop, as I used to know you.

JOHN: hehe, yeah so i heard!

JANE: You look so...

JANE: Young.

JOHN: thanks!

JOHN: so do you.

JOHN: my nanna, who used to be ashes on my fireplace, regained her old womanly visage when i turned her into a sprite, and she helped me along the way.

JOHN: so nanna is a sprite! did you know that?

JANE: Um... no?

JOHN: i thought you should know that. she's probably around somewhere. i hope you can meet her.

JOHN: oh, also, i'm your son technically. did you know that??

JANE: Yes.

JANE: It is... a pretty strange fact!

JANE: But also pretty cool.

JOHN: yup!

ROXY: ooh jane thats my daughter there say hi to her!!!

JANE: Hi!

ROSE: Hi, John's hot mom.

ROSE: (Aw shit.)

JANE: Haha...?

ROXY: also thats umm ANOTHER version of rose who died and then i buried and a stupid cat unburied her for some reason and prototyped her

ROXY: so say hello to my cool floaty double daughter!

JANE: Hi, Roxy's hot double daughter.

ROSESPRITE: :D

ROSESPRITE: (Rose Prime, I believe you may have just been owned.)

ROSE: (God damn Dave's contagious-ass Freudian boners.)

JANE: Wow, I feel so out of the loop! Sorry if I still seem disoriented from my... nap, I suppose it was?

JANE: Or impromptu troll-coma.

JANE: Roxy, you have to clue me in on what happened here! Where are Dirk and Jake?

JANE: And for that matter, John, where are your other friends? Oh, Jade! Where is she? Is she still asleep?

ROXY: hey janey that is all like a lot of stuff to say and everything goin on here is faaairly complicated and heavily peopled

ROXY: dont worry ill ease you into comprehending shit again ;)

ROXY: well ok cliff notes are: jake fucked off somewhere and dirk recently fucked off BACK here through a window but he left again pretty quick...

ROXY: dave went with dirk at wherever their fucking off too now, i think to get ready for some swords fightin, and yeah jade is still asleep but a coupla trolls lugged her off somewhere safe for now

ROXY: the REST of the junk im still sorting out myself bcs like i said im new to this exact plane of shenanigans

JANE: Yes, you mentioned that.

JANE: I still don't know what you meant by...

JANE: Wait!

JANE: You and John came from another reality, where everything went horribly, right?

ROXY: m-hmmm!

JANE: I just remembered. Really, it's been such a rollercoaster ride for my memory, since I fell asleep.

JANE: Your and John's travels were a critical part of the illustrated story we reconstructed through our memories with Callie.

ROXY: wat!

ROXY: you saw callie in your dreams????

JANE: I did!

ROXY: hoh man

ROXY: how is she!

ROXY: i saw her in a dream a little while ago and we talked about lots of stuff

ROXY: she looked like a troll then

JANE: Yes, her trollsona! She had hers on when I saw her.

JANE: And we had ours on too!

ROXY: :O FUCK

JANE: She seemed to be doing well.

JANE: Nervous, of course, since she was hiding. But we passed the time with our stories.

JANE: It was a lot of fun! I'm so happy I got to meet her.

JANE: I wonder if I'll ever get the chance again?

ROXY: wellll...

ROXY: now that u mention it

ROXY: it IS one of my chief objectives to go lookin for her asap

ROXY: aaand not to be THAT ROGUE n brag all heavy but i MAY be in better touch with my void powers now

ROXY: soo maybe i stand a p good chance of trackin her down?

ROXY: cus i GOT somethin for her

JANE: You do?? What? :B

ROXY: just a lil presie, nbd

JANE: ...

JANE: I see.

ROXY: JK IT IS CRUCIAL FUKKIN BLING JANEY

ROXY: ONE (1) PRICELESS DIGIT DONUT!!!

ROXY: W/ MORE KARATS THAN A RABBIT TOO FAT FOR A HOLE

ROXY: (s'magic to)

JANE: WOW!!!!!!!!!!

JANE: Ahem, so,

JANE: You mean a ring, then.

JOHN: yeah!

JOHN: oh man, that's a great idea roxy.

JOHN: you should try and give it to her as soon as you can!

JOHN: then maybe we can all meet her before we ramp up for this battle?

ROXY: hmm yeh!

ROXY: u think i can do it?

JOHN: sure!

ROSE: I like your chances too.

ROSESPRITE: Same!

JASPERSPRITE: Me too roxy! :3

ROSE: I also have some experience helping people along in the right direction, when it comes to navigating the abyss.

ROSE: Maybe I could assist?

ROXY: yeah maybe!

ROSESPRITE: I'm pretty sure I have experience performing literally the exact same task, in a slightly different context.

ROSESPRITE: So maybe I can double assist?

JOHN: see roxy? everyone thinks you should do it, because they all believe in you.

JANE: That's right!

ROXY: shucks fuckers ._.

ROXY: yall killin me here <3

JASPERSPRITE: Meow im so happy!

ROXY: frigglish u silly bastard whats up?

JASPERSPRITE: Purr purr purr...

JASPERSPRITE: All the humans being so close together and happy and friendly purr purr.

JASPERSPRITE: Its making me really excited and happy too and making me feel like i want to be a part of everything!

JASPERSPRITE: Purr purr and get close to a nearby person and be happy at them with my body purrrr...

ROSESPRITE: Jaspers, what are you...

JASPERSPRITE: I cant help it rose i want to cuddle im feeling so pleased and friendly! :3 :3 :3

ROSESPRITE: Jaspers, no,

ROSESPRITE: No, don't!

ROSESPRITE: JASPERS, NOOOOO!

JASPERSPRITE: :3 purrrrrrr

[audiofictioncouk]

New Fiction Podcasts - 18th August 2024

Crucible - A Byron Chronicles Tale Audio Drama The final segment in the Master of Sorrow Trilogy. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240809-01&check=Yes RSS: https://www.spreaker.com/show/6260327/episodes/feed

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Multiversally Misplaced Audio RPG A podcast that travels throughout fandoms in a great TTRPG style with 4 friends, if you love comedy, crude humor, and fandoms like Fallout, Walking Dead, Jimmy Neutron, and Spider-man then this is the pod for you! New Episodes on the 10th and 20th of every month. Starring: Fey Wild as the DM and Host, Juan Reyes as himself and the Editor, Oz as themselves, Tian as himself. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240809-02&check=Yes RSS: https://media.rss.com/multiversallymisplaced/feed.xml

Walkie-Talkie Audio Drama Walkie-Talkie is a scripted narrative comedy podcast that follows Katie, a young asexual woman, who decides to meet and connect with new people by hiding a walkie-talkie in a new place each week and then going on a walk with the person who finds it. Essentially, she sets herself up on platonic blind dates. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240812-01&check=Yes RSS: https://anchor.fm/s/f9b81c18/podcast/rss

Dungeon Masters Audio Drama Dungeon Masters takes a behind-the-curtain look into the world of Dungeons & Dragons, told through the lenses of the creator of the game, Gary Gygax, played by Wil Wheaton and of private investigator, William Dear, played by Jon Hamm, a swashbuckling tough guy in 1979. Gygax guides the audience through this incredible true story as our Dungeon Master, as we follow Dear on his quest to find Dallas Egbert, a Michigan State student, who supposedly disappeared in the steam tunnels under his University while enacting a real-life version of D&D. What Dear encounters on this journey and ultimately discovers, defies all expectations, and changes the culture as we know it. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240812-02&check=Yes RSS: https://feeds.megaphone.fm/QCD9312075181

MERCY: A Queer Eldritch Western Audio Drama Wayne Sawyer is a grizzled jack-of-all-trades, helping the folk of Mercy for a mere pittance. When he meets the bizarre and enigmatic academic, Doctor Daisy Gray, they are both thrust into dangers beyond human comprehension. A queer eldritch audio drama set during the tail end of the wild west. For adult audiences only. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240813-01&check=Yes RSS: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/mercy-a-queer-eldritch-western

Palace of Mirrors Audio Book A narrative podcast about a mysterious talking sword that leads a boy on adventure across a dying moon. About a woman seeking her revenge at any cost. About a scarred pirate, broken and twisted, who can see the future and will stop at nothing to meet it. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240813-02&check=Yes RSS: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/2393496.rss

The PMRP Podcast Audio Drama The Post-Meridian Radio Players (the PMRP) have been performing audio dramas in front of an audience since 2005. This podcast will showcase some of our past performances from our almost two decade history, along with some new material and surprises! https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20231011-10&check=Yes RSS: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/2245345.rss

The Last Floor Audio Drama Four people at different seasons in their lives answer a job ad. They have no idea what the job is or what it will entail. They have no idea that they were chosen...for a reason. Follow them as they go up to the Last Floor. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240814-01&check=Yes RSS: https://www.spreaker.com/show/6244913/episodes/feed

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The LZR Project Audio Book For years, Mr. Big terrorized the city of Lysallis and most of Enera, carving a path of destruction and chaos through most of Western Anaisha. To put a stop to him once and for all, the teen heroes known as the Lazerblades decide to form a joint venture with the Enera government to enact The LZR Project in the hopes of bringing Lysallis's crime lord - and his thugs - to justice. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240805-03&check=Yes RSS: https://media.rss.com/the-lzr-project/feed.xml

SHOT fictions. Audio Book Découvrez SHOT, votre micro dose de fictions.SF, thriller, drame... serez-vous prêt.e.s pour la chute ? https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240725-05&check=Yes RSS: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/shot-fictions

Nuka-Tales Radio Audio Drama Dive into the irradiated world of “Nuka Tales,” where every episode unveils a new story from the Fallout universe. From the desolate Capital Wasteland to the glitzy New Vegas Strip, our narratives explore survival, betrayal, and redemption. Join us as we unravel forgotten secrets, encounter mutated creatures, and grapple with moral choices. Whether you’re a Vault dweller or a wandering wasteland wanderer, “Nuka Tales” delivers post-apocalyptic tales that resonate across the digital wasteland. Tune in for immersive storytelling, captivating world-building, and the haunting echoes of a bygone era. Because in the wasteland, every story is a fight for survival—one episode at a time. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240802-03&check=Yes RSS: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/nukatales

Boohouse Books, Short Horror Stories Audio Book Audible tales of horror written and narrated by Mark Steven Nordlund. New story every month, more information available at boohousebooks.com https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240808-03&check=Yes RSS: https://feed.podbean.com/boohousebooks/feed.xml

Shelterwood Audio Drama Shelterwood: A Suburban Gothic is a Docu-Horror Podcast written and produced by Stephen Indrisano. Join one man’s quest to find his long-lost sister in an infinite, monster-infested suburb beyond the veil. Shelterwood is one part Gothic, one part Found Footage, and one hundred percent terrifying. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240815-01&check=Yes RSS: https://feeds.megaphone.fm/BDA2155394596

The Bad Spot Audio RPG Join Matt Risby as he plays Ironsworn: Starforged by Shawn Tomkin. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240807-02&check=Yes RSS: https://feed.podbean.com/thebadspotcast/feed.xml

What's Poppin' Penny? Audio Drama Welcome Trusted Adults & Brownstone Buddies to What's Poppin' Penny? A Whimsical Podcast for Preschoolers and Families! Join us as we embark on enchanting journeys with Penny Wright, a curious preschooler with brown skin and curly hair who lives in a cozy multi-generational household filled with love, laughter, and learning. Penny's life takes a magical turn when she finds a teddy bear in a box of her grandfather's belongings during a game of hide-and-seek with her grandmother, Spicy. Thanks to a familial poem her grandfather taught her, Penny learns that when your past is just your beginning, your ancestors' gifts can always find you! https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20231014-02&check=Yes RSS: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/2256958.rss

Beyond Awakening Audio Drama In what seems to be the far future, the crew of a Galactic Confederation spaceship must learn to distinguish fact from fiction before they go insane. Full cast science fiction stereo audio drama. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240816-01&check=Yes RSS: https://www.quietplease.org/awakening/podcast.rss

Morsectomy Audio Drama Morsectomy is a 4 part philosophical mystery podcast following the endeavours of Eli Smalldale, a journalist after the truth behind what he believes to be a corruption scandal in the justice system. PLEASE NOTE: Morsectomy is an interactive experience. You must uncover the 4th and final episode yourself by solving a series of puzzles. Hints for these puzzles can be found in the Episode 3 Description. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240813-04&check=Yes RSS: https://anchor.fm/s/f77b9164/podcast/rss

Silvertongues Audio Drama On the tranquil shores of the Kalalani Island Chain, two lost souls discover they have no past. But paradise turns deadly when Roscoe Talbott and Tavi Jones uncover a conspiracy that blurs the lines between truth and lies. Silvertongues is an indie science-fiction podcast produced by Acorn Arts & Entertainment. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240815-02&check=Yes RSS: https://anchor.fm/s/f2bcc1fc/podcast/rss

Survivors of Johanum Audio Book An audiobook adaptation of the novel ”Isolation” by Tiffany Aurora. https://audiofiction.co.uk/show.php?id=20240814-03&check=Yes RSS: https://feed.podbean.com/survivorsofjohanum/feed.xml

[catabolic-seeds]

little thing but i love how you handle john/june, as a tmasc john kinnie i like that you don’t erase their original identity because even outside of my kin i think egbert is very genderfluid and is still chill with masc presentation…. anyways that’s all i just like how much variety you do! :D

I have lots of headcanons for jegbert! Both transmasc and transfem :-) i like to sprinkle in variety with what I do ! it’s a little inside joke of mine that every alternate version of jegbert has a different gender to some degree, every time they meet another version they end up having to sort that out lol. but thank you so much !! <3

[i-am-why]

Day 6

Jerb’s dad, Dr. D. B. Egbert otherwise known as “Dr. Dad” by Jerb.He was an Enron executive under the job of “Fraud management” before he lived with Jerb. He also took on B-move action plots after the dissipation of Enron eventually becoming a criminal to the Betty Crocker empire. After which he had hid in a random house in the middle of nowhere hiding from the horrors of earth B.

He fights using his gold credit  card, a reference to the move “The Glimmer man”.Dr. Dad seems to have a ton of references to steven segal in particular, his design seems to be some mashup between his younger and older self. But segal isn't the only inspiration, it also seems like he was the canonical version of the “Dr. brinner ghost psychiatrist” rumor that was spread around on the mspa forums. There isn't much known about it but there is a tv tropes page on it. Some of it may have leaked into a diagetic webcomic in the gamma session.

[spacedhead]

homestuck reread #6: a5a2 part 2

this shit is so trippy and weird and honestly scary im actually scared. the context for the first image is that jade is entering a dream bubble for the first time since her dream self is dead. the second image is daves dreamself looking into the void and seeing like the horrorterrors. and then jade sees them too somehow in the dream bubble.... its honestly horrifying and has me quite perturbed.

it seems like she is also perturbed. and PISSED AWF

IM INCLINED TO AGREE WITH HIM. SUDDENLY HE SEEMS SENSIBLE AND NORMAL I WOULD SAY. I WOULD CALL HIM THESE THINGS.

this is so funny i thought this was just a jade karkat and future karkat interaction but then fucking dave just Appears out of nowhere . so cool

LOOK AT MY SON (do not look at his computer. we wont talk about it) HE IS SO REAL

okay so theres been tons happening but im pretty sure i never got an explanation as to why daves bro is just randomly on LOWAS (land of wind and shade) . and why jack knew he was there. like what are these freaks doing on my sons planet. should i keep calling him my son. gay daughter or thot son

hate these guys but love sword fights so net neutral (secretly cool)

DAVE SPRITE!!! weird that he also knew to come to lowas. i feel like i may be missing some critical information

they are so cute

this is how i talk to my friends on the internet. except maybe with meows

oh god i think this is where everything goes to shit . with umbral ultimatum as the soundtrack. really good song! anyway. gonna watch this now

this is so bad oh man oh god

well. at least theres this. L mans

stop talking to gray text stupid dumb. i think the fact that i find this funny proves that my brain needs to be studied

wow check out this awesome panel. vriska IS the fire. the irons.... are john? irons in the fire. its the thing she always says. i uh i think i lost the metaphor

YESSS HE DID IT HE DID THE [redacted]

what a fucking crazy amount of wind my son has just summoned. that is so much wind. its covering the whole planet!!!!

i love how matter of fact he is about it. like oh this giant swirling vortex covering my entire planet? oh i did that? oh thats cool.

i never read into this before but damn its crazy that feferi is dead here cause the last time we saw her she was literally fine. what could have happened..... ( i already know)

OH HELLYES . HELL FUCKING YES I LOVE THIS SONG

me to your fucking house

dawwwwww

no need to serve this hard??? but pop off i guess....

not you too....

er okay tavros just tried to make jade his girl friend without even really knowing her and he was being really annoying and kind of an asshole while doing it and then she let him down nicely but then vriska was like bro that was the worst thing i have ever seen and was very VERY mean to him about it (maybe even more than he deserved) and then admitted to being the reason why jack noir is a super powerful evil creature now AND BONUS SHE GOT A VERSION OF DAVE KILLED >:((((

i dont wanna dwell on that though because one of my favorite parts of the comic is coming up right now :3

fun fact: "heir transparent" "doctor" and "planet healer" are all songs of john egbert :D

ANYWAY ITS TIME FOR ANOTHER GAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!YESSSSSSSSILOVE GAMING !!!! SBURB

8888)

he did it :)

i think this is a good place to end this one . general thoughts right now? huge. pog. things are happening. plans are being formed. i kind of glossed over them but rose and dave are planning to explode the green sun. john just went god tier. and jade is finally in. on the trolls side of things we finally understand why their session went wrong at the last moment, but it seems like even more has gone wrong since weve seen them last? feferi is dead. tavros wants to kill vriska. what could possibly happen next. tune in next time . i dont know when it will be. probably tomorrow. what with all the waiting i'll be doing.

[treetownconfessions]

someone write a study about this because i also tried once and it was so bad i gave up .

The problem with trying to introduce a third party with Flippy/Fliqpy's name choice is that there are only so many "rules" you can abide by before you're desperately scrounging the entire alphabet for something that'll sound decent. Fliqpy’s name was done by replacing the first p in Flippy's name with the letter q, both because it's a flipped version of p as a play on words for his position in the show, and because it's the letter right after p in the alphabet.

If we apply these "rules" to the name-making, we have like, three options.

a. The name's lettering has to be significant to who they are compared to Flippy, since he's the host and Fliqpy’s entire gag is being the "flipped" version of Flippy. It's already very on the nose and easy to decipher, so I'm not sure how you'd do that with other letters. I'm open to suggestions.

b. The name's lettering has to be a variation of the p shape, since that's what q is, which leaves us b and d. "Flibpy" and "Flidpy" are definitely names! They're not good ones.

c. The name's lettering has to be next to the letter p (and q, I guess) in the alphabet. This leaves us with o, the letter before p, and r, the letter after q. "Fliopy" and "Flirpy" are equally terrible names.

The fourth unspoken rule is just grabbing any letter from the alphabet and putting it in. I have, in fact, tried this. Even if you're placing it on the second p it just doesn't work out. So, yeah, I guess you're stuck with Flippy, Fliqpy, and John Egbert.

.

[kozzax]

I just got to Jake sending the robot bunny back in time for John

Yeah so you're not there yet for sure. Again you'll know when it happens. It's. Uh. It's kind of hard to miss.

How do you feel about GUY FIERI AND THE CLOWN GOVERNMENT though. There's a whole little community of people who have huge thoughts about the alpha versions of- usually the strilondes, but sometimes alpha jade and alpha egbert are in there too.

You've got some really fucked up reveals in the next uhhhh 200 pages or so. Get ready for some big Callie emotions :D

[wepreeshjohnegbert]

Doomed boy having fun with snow!

[plugnuts]

TG: ...they tricked john into skipping way ahead and getting his ass handed to him by the denizen

Inspired by a panel in ikimaru’s lyricstuck Doomed!John is just so tragic, I love him

[sleepy-timaeus]

EGBERT VS. ALIENS

hi :D this is a bit of a redraw of egbert filming an alien abduction. original was from 2019, but honestly i thought i came from at least 2017 for some reason until i checked the OG date 💀

i "had" (read: wanted) to redo it since im getting a new credit card. i figured it might as well have an updated photo of art growth as well. that, plus i love women :D

feel free to use as a pfp or anything, just reblog plis so i know 💕

2019 version & unedited 2022 version will be under the cut <3

[pesterloglog]

John Egbert, Vriska Serket

Act 5, page 3949-3953

EB: i remember now.

EB: i was tricked by a troll into flying up to the last gate, using this rocket pack.

EB: she said i could take a shortcut and go kill my denizen while he was sleeping.

EB: it...

EB: did not quite work out that way.

AG: This sounds like Terezi's handiwork.

EB: i don't know. she didn't tell me her name.

EB: she was a blind troll. she made me this incredibly shitty map for me to follow!

AG: Yep. That's her.

AG: I guess she got 8oth of us then. Un8elieva8le.

EB: she tricked you too?

AG: Yes.

AG: Well, not tricked, so much as made a pointless coin flip and sta88ed me in the 8ack.

EB: wow. that's pretty cold blooded!

AG: Oh, sure. She was easily the most underhanded and villainous mem8er of our group.

AG: 8ut I did let my guard down. And even when she sta88ed me, I sure didn't think I was going to die.

EB: why not?

AG: It turns out immortality isn't all it's cracked up to 8e. Let's leave it at that.

EB: hmm...

EB: so i guess you never got around to giving me immortality like you said? or killing me, for that matter.

EB: sounds like the blind troll beat you to it.

AG: No, I did! 8ut........

AG: Ugh, this will 8e hard to explain to you.

EB: explain what?

AG: Haha. I guess in her own sick way, she actually set us up on this d8 together.

AG: May8e I should thank her whenever she falls asleep? Or dies, god for8id.

EB: so...

EB: now it is a date?

AG: I don't know.

AG: I said it wouldn't 8e unless you remem8ered. And now you remem8er.

AG: 8ut you still don't remem8er me, do you?

EB: nope.

AG: Yeah, thought so.

AG: This version of you died 8efore I started messing with you. Not that I expect you to understand what that means.

EB: no, i get that.

EB: if i had decided not to take the shortcut, i would have lived. and then you would have talked to me a lot?

AG: Yes, that's right.

AG: I guess I should have learned to give you more credit 8y now.

EB: well, i might not have figured that out, if not for...

EB: some things that just happened.

AG: I still can't 8elieve I'm meeting a version of you that doesn't remem8er a thing a8out me. None of my gr8 exploits, or any of the ways I helped you. Only that one stupid time I taunted you!

AG: It's a vaguely frustr8ing feeling.

EB: sorry... not sure what to tell you!

AG: So you remem8er literally nothing I told you a8out myself? Not even the, uh........

AG: Compromising stuff?

EB: well, you did just show me around your planet. which was really cool!

EB: ... there's compromising stuff?

AG: Your species would think so. 8ut I guess it doesn't matter anymore.

EB: i guess not.

EB: but who says we can't get to know each other again?

AG: You wouldn't find that 8oring?

EB: no way! not if you wouldn't.

EB: you said the name of the blind troll who killed us, but you have not told me yours yet.

AG: I haven't?

EB: no.

AG: ........

AG: It's Vriska.

EB: nice to meet you, vriska.

EB: i am john! even though you know that.

AG: Yes.

EB: so now what do we do? aside from be dead for probably ever.

AG: Man, I don't know.

AG: May8e,

AG: You could tell me a8out how you died?

AG: What were the "things that just happened" you were talking a8out?

EB: well, like i said, i flew up to the last gate. like this.

EB: oh, nice boots!

AG: ::::D

EB: it brought me inside the palace.

EB: it was huge, and it took a long time to explore. it was eerily empty too.

EB: i had that weird feeling of getting to a place in a video game you are not supposed to be yet, because you don't have the right powerups and such.

EB: you know what i mean?

AG: Not really.

AG: I'm used to taking shortcuts whenever I play games.

EB: oh, ok.

EB: so, i started getting crazy nervous the longer i was down here, and i was starting to wonder if my silly iron pogo hammer would even do any damage against the monster.

AG: *Snort.*

EB: what?

AG: Against a denizen? Of course that piece of shit isn't going to do anything.

AG: If I were you, I would have chucked it into the forge.

EB: excuse me, it is called the wrinkle fucker, and it is totally amazing.

AG: It might 8e alright if you com8ined it with something awesome.

AG: Like some cool dice, for instance.

EB: that's so absurd, like anything like that would ever even happen!!!

AG: What's this?

EB: i found it very deep in the palace dungeon. i was wandering for hours, following a horrible sound through the pipes.

EB: i could tell typheus was really close, because it was very loud here. it could only be the sound of him sleeping.

EB: i was so tempted to play it, but i didn't dare risk waking him up!

EB: pretty much by then i was sweating bullets at the thought of confronting him.

AG: You were right to 8e nervous. Denizens are incredi8ly powerful monsters. You had no chance whatsoever at this stage of the game.

AG: You might have stood a chance after I started helping you. 8ut Terezi really screwed you over 8y leading you here so early.

EB: yeah...

EB: i guess if i ever see her, i should thank her too.

AG: Why?

EB: because this was important.

AG: What was? Getting killed 8y a monster?

EB: well, yes. but not just that.

EB: the whole ruse was important!

EB: if i didn't make the decision to go, then dave would not be able to go back in time and fix things.

EB: in fact, if i didn't die here in this palace, we never would have been born in the first place!

AG: How could you know all that?

EB: this way...

AG: This denizen does not look asleep to me.

EB: nooope.

EB: he was wide awake when i found him. i practically crapped my pants!

AG: Well, that explains your quick death. If your denizen was anything like mine, it wouldn't have wasted much time 8efore unleashing a huge shitstorm of devast8ing monster magic.

EB: what was your denizen like?

AG: Her name was Cetus.

AG: She was this awful sea monster. Her lair was deep underground amidst a 8unch of shipwrecks. She was quite vicious and territorial. I knew I had to kill her quickly to release the hoard, 8efore she had the chance to do anything tricky.

EB: what do you mean, tricky?

EB: did she talk to you?

AG: Oh, of course. She was 8a88ling in riddles through most of the fight. I wasn't paying much attention though. I mean, what creature DOESN'T speak in 8oring riddles in this game?

EB: so, is that what you all did?

EB: kill your denizens as fast as possible, without listening to them?

AG: Yeah, pretty much. We were all pretty good players, remem8er?

EB: yes, so i've heard.

AG: Well........

AG: Ok, I can't exactly speak for everyone. There was a lot going on, and I don't know how some people went a8out 8eating their denizens.

AG: For instance, I'm not sure how our hero of 8reath did it. May8e the monster just released the hoard for him out of pity????????

EB: maybe he just talked to his denizen?

AG: If there was a way to avoid a tough 8attle, I'm sure he found it.

AG: It sounds like a good way to cheat yourself out of a lot of sweet xp and loot though.

EB: i dunno. you might be surprised!

AG: John, are you saying you had a nice friendly chat with this hideous, 8loodthirsty creature 8efore he killed you?

EB: yes!

EB: typheus may not be pretty to look at...

EB: but he is not a bad guy at all!

[technofantasia]

post your scrimblo bimblos and so forth for homestuck.

:'0 ASKS FOR AN ASK GAME.......... THANK U also @rystonlentil bc you also asked for homestuck so i shall DELIVER in my TYPICAL WORDY FASHION

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most): John. Definitely. I love John Egbert so much anybody who says he's boring is WRONG because he's NOT BORING he's just nice and generally likable and represses everything all the time so his problems don't seem as interesting but they ACTUALLY ARE INTERESTING. I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL JUSTICE FOR MY EGG SON

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped): .........Karkat. Yes he's an asshole but he's also so sensitive and a raging tsundere and he needs affection in the cold cruel world he lives and he's so good and I want to hug him So Bad

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave): Excluding John from this category bc he's already my blorbo... mmmm probably Sollux! I love Sollux like a lot and people just don't talk about him much. He's really funny and what we get of his character in canon is extremely appealing to me! And people do wonders with him in fanfiction, too. He's like a more assholish version of Dave, ilhsm. Definitely got the short end of the canon stick

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week): The Signless!! Really I just love all the ancestors an odd amount but The Signless specifically. Yeah sure he never actually got a single line of dialogue (unless you count a heavily implied "fuck") but his place in the story is just so interesting and you can assume so many interesting things about what he must have been like from context, his association with Karkat, and his association with Kankri, that I just adore reading things about him. Signless-era Alternia is such a great setting and The Signless himself, written any number of ways, is just so gooood

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave): Like ok I could be obvious here and say that I actually really like Vriska, but I feel like that'd be boring. Everyone has a strong opinion on Vriska. Everyone knows why people like her, everyone knows why people hate her. Nonono, I'll double up on the fun and say I actually really like Caliborn. I haven't seen anybody who likes him!! But yeah I think he's absolutely hilarious, is entertaining every second he's onscreen, and has a surprising amount of pathos for a character that's meant to be unapologetically evil and just all around a horrible person. Near the end of Homestuck I was highkey hoping for a Caliborn heel-face turn actually (and had, like, theories and stuff to back it up, too)! Really feel like the ending stiffed him of his potential. But I'm probably literally the only person who thinks that lol

...Or.... actually I'm totally cheating by technically putting 3 characters here but also, Eridan would totally fit in this spot for me, too. I really like Eridan and felt he had a lot of potential if he'd just been given an opportunity to grow up a bit more and recognize the fucked up thought processes his upbringing instilled in him.

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason): This is just any of my favorite characters in other categories. I love putting my favorite characters in immense pain!! That's what fandom is about babey

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell): Gamzee goes to superhell for the crime of having his entire character ruined beyond recognition halfway through the comic. I really love Gamzee pre-murderstuck and both his character and everything it could have stood for got mutilated afterwards, making him By Far the worst character in the comic (in terms of, he wasn't entertaining and I didn't like when he was onscreen). It's tragic and worthy of an eeby-deebying imho

THANK YOU FOR ASKING!!! :D

[klokodyll]

The Sites of Seth

― Distribution of the Land. Lands of Seth

Geb, the Earth god, arbitrated between the confrontations of the Two Contenders (Horus and Seth) and decided to grant the Upper Egypt to Seth because it was the land where the god was born; and the Lower Egypt to Horus, for it was the land where his father had drowned (Lichteim1975, p.52). Hereinafter, Geb changed his mind and decided to bestow the entire land to the son of Osiris. The Horus myth of Edfu (Egberts 1997) tells that Seth complained and challenged his nephew to be finally defeated. Geb took pity on Seth and his allies, and sent them to the four cardinal points becoming, thus, the patriarchs of the lands surrounding Egypt: Kushites to the south, Asiatics to the north, Libyans to the west and Bedouins to the east (Egberts1997, p.50). This could be an account for the strong association between Seth and the foreign countries.

― Cult of Seth in Upper Egypt

Seth is given the title of “Lord of the Nile Valley Land” in the Pyramid Texts (Allen 2005, PT 155). There were cities and temples devoted to Seth until, apparently, the XXV Dynasty when the cult of Seth became extinct (Redford 2002, p.264), at least in the Nile Valley. Due to the frequent instability during the Intermediate Periods, the areas involved in these cities do not always correspond with the geographical boundaries, arranged by the Ptolemies and called nomes. Hence, I have arranged the cities considering the course of the Nile with disregard of the Ptolemaic organization. 

― Seth Lord of Ombos

There are two cities linked with “Seth Lord of Ombos”. One is the modern Kôm Ombo, 42 km south of Assuan, on the eastern bank of the Nile. The other is about 4 km on the northwest of the modern Tukh, in the area of Ballas called Ombos. The name of the former in Egyptian hieroglyphs is nbwty and the latter is nebwt (Daressy 1917, p.80). Ombos/Nebwt, was an important bastion for Seth and his followers during the Predynastic period around 3300 b.C. (Wilkinson 1999, p.37). Petrie (1896) found in this site the remains of an old city and a temple devoted to Seth. There are three steles from this temple exhibited in the Manchester Museum. One of them is the Anhotep Stele, where Seth appears as ‘Lord of Nebwty’ referring Kom Ombo:

According to Brugsch (1879, p.318) Seth was worshiped in Kom Ombo under the shape of the crocodile Sobek, deem to be the son of Seth (te Velde 1967, p.150). As we will see, crocodiles and hippopotamus were usually considered manifestations of the god Seth. Another piece from Naqada temple of Seth is located at Petrie Museum, London. Seth is featured standing in front of an offering table with an inscription reading: ‘Seth of Nebwt’, alluding Seth of Ombos (web 7). In the main deposit of this temple, Petrie found pieces out of alabaster with inscriptions describing the labor of enlargement made by Tutmosis III, who is mentioned as: “The good god Menkheperra, beloved of Seth of Nebwt”. In a lintel of the Temple, Seth is referred as ‘Seth of Nebwty, Lord of the Southern Land” (Petrie 1896, Pl LXXIX). In a round topped stele, now at the Glyptotek museum, a bull headed winged Seth is called “Bull of Nebwty”. The bull used to be an icon of Seth: in the Leyden Papyrus, “the son of Nwt” (which is a common epithet of Seth) is called “Bull of the night, Bull of Bull”(Griffith 1974, p.80).

― Seth Lord of Wnw and Nashenw

These two cities are sited about 50 km north of Denderah, close to the modern Kasr es-Sayed. Seth is referred as the lord of these two cities, in an inscription engraved in the inner side of the exterior wall at Medinet Habu (Gardiner 1947, p.53).

― Seth Lord of Tjebw

Tjebw (Tbw) was the capital city of the X Ptolemaic nome called wADt. Ancient Greeks called it Anteopolis (the city of the giant Anteus) and was settled on the east bank of the Nile. In latter times, the name of the city changed into Djw-Ka (Dw-qa), ‘the high mountain’ (Barguet 1964, p.8), Qau el-Kebir in Arabic. The original deity of this nome was Antewy, portrayed as a double falcon on a boat and assimilated to Seth, as we can see in the stele of Nakht (XVIII Dynasty):

According to Teeter (2003,p.42): “This dual identity is a reflection of the belief that a god could have more than one nature, and that he or she could have the attributes of several deities in order to express the extender power of the god”. This approach is important because all throughout the northern part of Upper Egypt we find the double falcon as the emblem of many cities that could be ancient centers of Seth cult. Over time, the cult of Seth was put aside and replaced by the double falcon, representing the reconciliation between both Horus and Seth (te Velde 1967, p.68). An inscription was found at Qâu showing the priest title sHtp nTrwy, that is to say, ‘Reconciling the two gods’ (Gardiner 1947, p. 53). According to latter versions of the myth, the battle between Horus and Typhon (Seth for the Romans) took place on the river bank close to this city, which was eventually destroyed completely. Today is El-Etmaniyah (Gardiner 1947, p.49). There was a cult to the Sethian animal, the hippopotamus, at Tjebu from the Predynastic period (Lang 1980, p. 361; Gardiner 1947, p.135) shown by a scene of the mayor of Tjebu worshiping a hippopotamus surrounded by papyrus. The inscription here is badly damaged but it could be read as: “Seth, the victorious, the hippopotamus, the Lord of the Tjebw in the nome of wADt” (Brunton 1927, Pl. 32). In the12292 Stele, now at the Oriental Institute in Chicago Illinois, a man called Pa-nehemi stands before Seth as a hippopotamus on pedestal (web 8) 

List of Places:

- Seth Lord of Ombos  ✔️   - Seth Lord of Wnw and Nashenw ✔️ - Seth Lord of Tjebw  ✔️ - Seth of Shashetep - Seth of Per Anty - Seth lord of Saka - Seth Lord of Sepermeru - Seth of Oxyrhynchus - Seth lord of Sw

- Seth lord of Avaris: Seth lord of hwt wart - Seth of Medjem - Seth lord of the Oasis - The temple of Seth at Kharga - Seth in Dakhla Oasis - Seth in Siva Oasis

Others: - Seth Lord of the Foreign Lands - Seth Lord of the Sky

― SETH AND THE ENVIRONMENT ( Maria Jose Amor Martinez )

Related post: The Sites of Seth: Seth and the Environment

[bladekindeyewear]

HS^2 bloggin’ mainline 2020-12-25

I’m not going to spend time BLOGGING an upd8 on Christmas morning!

...yes I am who the fuck am I kidding.  (Bonus stuff and Hiveswap are still well on hold though.)

So are we gonna follow up on the main ship?  Probably not, right, with that perfect Karkat point to cut away, right?  We’re just going to leave Roxy’s question hanging, as well as makeouts etiquette, and leave while having seen a COUPLE FRAMES of non-possessed canon Jade with only whatever fun fanart was inspired across the internet by the moment to tide us over????

Yeah, probably.

Ugh, more Dirk.  I guess it’s overdue.  :(

> CHAPTER 16. Welcome to my Secret Lair

Oh huh, I guess not?  So... Jane’s, or Rose and Kanaya’s?

Karkat stays for longer than John thought he would. They talk a bit, but mostly they are quiet. Eventually, Karkat gets called away on yet more important war business, leaving John with one final touch on the shoulder. John leans into it in response, though he’s a bit ashamed of chasing down a sliver of physical affection so soon after obliterating Karkat’s evening like he had.

Pretty much, yeah.  Can’t blame either of them.

When Karkat is finally gone, John still doesn’t move. It isn’t as though he has nowhere else to go, since there are quite a few places he might attempt to make himself useful, for better or for worse.

You’re still abandoning the task that was explicitly yours to protect your literal kid and his friends, but, oh well.  Low-point.  Dave dead, house dead, broke news, I get it.

He just doesn’t feel ready for that yet. The remnants of his house are still smoldering, and he can’t stop staring at them. It would make sense, he thinks, to want to root around through the rubble for anything that’s still intact; some half-charred keepsake to claim as the last thing left that’s still his. But he doesn’t want to do it, and he doesn’t want to think about it. And he still can’t move.

Can’t move.  No Breath huh?  What’s going to get him to, then?

> (==>)

Oh boy, that might help.  XD  She’s pretty good at that.

> (==>)

Still with the waistline gap.  And was his phone always yellow like his God-Tier shoes?

ROXY: hey john can u do me a quick solid ROXY: actly idk how quick itll be but its definitely solid ROXY: harry anderson says i just missed u being here but could u skip back on over?

Nice, huh!  No judgment, just a hey-any-chance-you-could-swing-back.  He sort of needs to be needed right now, in a simple, almost everyday non-judgmental way I guess.  (That’s what he NEEDED anyway-- whether he deserved it though is up for debate.)

ROXY: i need help w/smth and yr darling boy is holed up in his room working on some fuckin craft project or other and cant be bothered

YES SEW JOHN A BETTER FITTING FUCKING OUTFIT

ROXY: and now that me and u are freshly on speakin terms again i might as well take advantage of that olive branch and put u to work ROXY: assumin you havent died in an air raid, that is ROXY: which id also be interested in knowin about so if u wld be so kind as to reply instead of leavin me hangin

Heheheh.  Gosh Roxy is always the best.

JOHN: yea yea sorry im here. JOHN: i just had a hard time getting my phone out of these fucking tiny pants.

Hah.

JOHN: and also my house is bombed out so i'm kinda grappling with that. JOHN: but i honestly am not sure how much longer i need to sit around staring at it. trying to align my memories of my youth with whatever is happening right now so JOHN: short version is no i’m not dead, and yeah i can come back over there and help you out. ROXY: oh sweet yr alive and down to do manual labor its a win/win JOHN: see you soon.

Yep!  Pulled away from all the metaphorical, ultra-meaningful bullshit, back to some brass tacks with some easy humor.  Definitely something Roxy can do well.~

> (==>)

EXCUSE ME.  What is that outfit and pose.  Did you--

ROXY: sup ROXY: follow me ROXY: well were just going to my room so i guess technically u know the way JOHN: haha ok.

Did you invite him over for the manual labor of banging you while your son is sewing in the other room

Or maybe the labor is making him a new sibling.  JFC

Is this plan part of why we got the sudden content warning that was mocked or was that mainly for Hiveswap 

John follows, trying to shake the ominous feeling he got from what she’d just said. He’d been in and out of this house a lot in the past few days. Why should this be any different?

I DUNNO JOHN DOES THIS SEEM DIFFERENT TO YOU

> (==>)

Yea this seems like a fucc room.

JOHN: it’s not like i could forget! ROXY: ya i guess u only really saw the living room when you were here the other day but i have changed some stuff up ROXY: done a lil redecoratin here n there

So it’s MORE of a fucc room than previously >__>”

ROXY: may have to do a smidge more if my old bff decides im next on the list for bombing out ROXY: but so far so good

Ah geez.

ROXY: just a coupla exploded cars in the yard from some shenanigans our dear son and his friends were in but u kno it is what it is!!!

Well, that’ll buff out easy.

ROXY: can i get u anything? ROXY: just made some coffee JOHN: no, uh, i’m good.

Of course she has a fancy handled winecoffeeglass  (and the handle does look ridiculous but it’d be too hot to hold otherwise)

Roxy shrugs and swirls her own coffee around in her novelty mug. John looks around. A lot about the room is the same. The family photos, the rug. There’s a lot more cat stuff in there now, though. The bed is new. John feels like he’s about to take a test he hasn’t studied for. He makes himself focus on what she’s saying.

That would be the feeling.

> (==>)

MY GOD.  Roxy is so fucking good at this holy shit

She KNOWS she’s making him squirm and she loves it

JOHN: so uh anyway. JOHN: what was this favor? ROXY: yo why dont u just come rest yr tush for a bit ROXY: take a lil relax next 2 me here JOHN: haha uh. JOHN: roxy i uh. JOHN: im flattered, but i don’t know if that’s really the right step right now. JOHN: don’t get me wrong, everything seems so fucked up right now that when i try to think about what might actually BE the right step, it feels like a huge cartoon question mark might physically manifest over my head. JOHN: but I’m not sure if um rekindling our physical relationship is really the best--

So is Roxy trolling him, about to reveal she wasn’t thinking of sex and was just making things seem sultry?  Or just had “lol jk” as an option-select, maybe.

> (==>)

ROXY: r u kiddin me rn egbert JOHN: i’m not? unless you were, in which case yeah lets say i was also kidding. JOHN: oh my god, i’m sorry, i don’t know why this making me freak out.

OH NOOO NOT THE DISDAAAAIN - CRITICAL HIT D:

ROXY: i remember our past boot knockin with fondness but that is a situation im not interested in revisiting

boot knockin XD

ROXY: look john ROXY: i was trying to be polite about it ROXY: offering u sustenance n rest n all ROXY: but you look like shit ROXY: i just wanted to catch up on the whole heinous war situation were in and maybe check in on e/o before leaping strait to the real n actual nonsexual manual labor favor i have in mind for u JOHN: oh.

Hey, she can’t help looking sexy she’s too good at it.

Is the manual labor moving the crashed cars?  Can’t Roxy pull that off on her own, or... banish the cars to the void or something?  (Oh, but WOULD she want to do it on her own when she can rope in John and bring him down to earth by giving him a useful task?  And admittedly his strength and wallet would make things easier.)

John feels his shoulders unbunch. Of course. Yeah. He’s almost embarrassed by how relieved he feels. So what if his ex wife wanted to hook up? Shouldn’t that be a situation he could navigate? Don’t people like to find solace in human physical connection during dire times? Why did the idea of it make his mind white out in panic more than, say, any number of the traumas he just experienced?

Probably some gender stuff mixed up in there too, June.

He doesn’t know, but he believes Roxy that he must look pretty haggard. He probably feels haggard? Maybe sitting down will feel better.

Just put your feet up yeah

> (==>)

WHAT A CUTE IMAGE

JOHN: sorry. like i said, my "how to react to stuff" meter is completely fucked right now. ROXY: thats fair bud

she’s used to being patient with you don’t worry otherwise you never would’ve gotten this far

ROXY: real fast i do need to do a quick takeback of all that shit i said last time we talked about janey not being literally the most evil person we knew or whatever ROXY: i guess i was hopped up on arguin or somethin since that was before we hit our conversational vibe bc of course u were right and i shoulda listened

Ouch.  Yeah, we saw just lately just how far off the deep end she was.  (Where was that funny upd8 reaction art summarizing the bit where Kanaya was holding Tavros hostage and Jane was transparently debating “hmm do I let my son die?” and Kanaya and Tavros were just looking at each-other flat-mouthed nervous?  I REALLY wanted to share that but I don’t usually want to reblog or put most stuff HS^2 not under a read-more, for spoiler purposes, usually.)

ROXY: im just glad ur ok ROXY: or like alive JOHN: yeah, jury's still out on "ok" but, you know. ROXY: ya ROXY: u said ur house is gone?? JOHN: yep. JOHN: completely. ROXY: jeez ROXY: i would ask how ur feelin but like the answer 2 that has got 2b "prtty bad"

Talk it ouuuut~~  get those feels out there and articulated john

JOHN: yeah. JOHN: i mean. JOHN: no? JOHN: it’s weird. JOHN: it feels like it should be a bigger deal, I guess? JOHN: like it’s my HOUSE. JOHN: but mostly it always felt like my dad’s house? JOHN: and when i started living there after i moved out of here, it was like i crammed myself back into whatever was left of my kid self? JOHN: and it didn’t feel good, but it at least was familiar, you know? JOHN: like living there let me feel closer to my dad, trying to be like the way i remember him, or like how i remember him wanting me to be, or something? JOHN: and i didn’t realize how much i hated doing that until i saw it all go up in flames. JOHN: so i guess i could have used my powers to stop the fire and save whatever was left of the place, but i couldn’t bring myself to do it. JOHN: like some fucked up part of me was glad i got there too late? JOHN: so i just sat there, watching, trying to figure out why watching my house burn down felt like i was being released from prison. JOHN: and even now i keep trying to explain it away, as though it’s because of how fucked up everything else is that it made me feel good. JOHN: but that’s just bullshit. JOHN: it DID feel good. JOHN: i DO feel free. JOHN: sorry.

I was kind of saying some Breath/Blood stuff at the time of him losing his last tie to his stubborn sticking-to-his-kid-self bit?  Except now we’re mixing it in with June Egbert and his gender-identity questions too.

ROXY: no need 2 apologize ROXY: we just delved in2 my whole gender thing last time so it seems fine for u to have a turn JOHN: i didn’t say it was a gender thing.

Oh shit

ROXY: well no i just meant like i did some sharing ROXY: like referrin 2 the topic i brought up when we chatted last ROXY: but like now that u mention it ROXY: *meaningful pause* JOHN: … JOHN: i JOHN: ROXY: lol well we can move on 2 the favor part if youd rather ROXY: stick a lil pin in that topic n come back 2 it when u have had sleep

Are you just INCREDIBLY incisive Roxy or have you and John talked about this before?

ROXY: like i said the other day its not like this shits figureoutable in 1 sitting anyways JOHN: yeah... ROXY: sooooooo ROXY: movin on

It’s just fine for Roxy to slow-roll this yeah, if she’s going to pry open that door a little

ROXY: dont be mad but theres a part of the house u didnt know abt the whole time u lived here JOHN: what? ROXY: yea ROXY: i got a secret lair ROXY: for my sciences

OH FUCK YES SCIENCE LAB, of COURSE Roxy would want a cool science lab basement because she always wants a cool science lab basement

ROXY: and i get to it via a transportalizer underneath our bed ROXY: which is 2 heavy 2 move by my lonesome so i just needed to borrow some o your aforementioned powers of wind

Okay no.  Wait.  What the fuck?

First of all, as funny and MSPaintAdventures-y as furniture being in the way of things is, why would you block it with a bed too heavy to move, but,

Second of all, more importantly, how is a GOD-TIER ROXY not strong enough to lift a heavy bed?!?!?!?  Either she’s lying to get John involved in things or this is a gendered cop-out because these characters are superheroes at the TOP of their echeladders, given obnoxiously powerful video-game strength and athletics only to then have ascended into DEITIES.  God-Tier Roxy could probably have lifted a bed like that when she was SEVENTEEN!  And now she’s an ADULT, out-of-shape or otherwise!  If this were a whole CAR I might be willing to handwave it, but just a heavy BED?!?  And none of the GUYS are going to have this much trouble lifting a bed like this, are they??  This just feels like following classic cartoony gender tropes in the complete absence of these characters’ super powers, what the fuck, and also Roxy if you didn’t make it Transportalizer-only access you could have given it an entrance you could phase through with your fancy powers to get to.  FUCK.

This feels stupid.

ROXY: so if u dont mind woosh away JOHN: uh ok, well... JOHN: a secret science lair, sure, i can deal with that. JOHN: why not! JOHN: it doesn’t work out great when i do the windy thing indoors, though. ROXY: aight then no wind bending just use your mangrit

Roxy flexes, the corner of her mouth pulled up into a familiar grin. John feels his guts, so recently calmed, twist up into knots again. Her eyebrows shoot up and the smile loosens. He must have shown something on his face.

You’re already THIS sensitive about gendertalk?

ROXY: ok or just like push when i push ROXY: we both got sick muscles ROXY: no other adjectives necessary JOHN: yeah ok. ROXY: on 3?

Please, please reinforce the idea that they both have sick strength, because they fucking do and the idea that Roxy actually a hundred percent NEEDED John to do this is BS.

> (==>)

JOHN: holy shit? ROXY: sorry to lop yet another huge scoop onto ur lil brains ice cream revelation sundae JOHN: so wait, if this thing's always been under the bed, how’d you get down here before without me? ROXY: well thats neither here nor there john JOHN: i mean it is kinda. Here. ROXY: fine ok checkmate ROXY: i dont ACTUALLY need ur nerdgrit for this escapade ROXY: like im sorry but i said it ROXY: i mostly just wanted to see you and show u wats down here

THANK FUCKING CHRIST.

If that wasn’t actually just a lie to get him involved I was going to stay SO mad.  Of COURSE Roxy can move a fucking BED no matter how heavy it is.  OF COURSE.

ROXY: and also uve been ~sent for~ JOHN: ok but like ROXY: john i am inviting u 2 my inner sanctum ROXY: i am literally bringing out the word "sanctum" in case u werent already clued in 2 how cool this is ROXY: so do u wanna go into my secret lair or wat JOHN: yeah!? JOHN: yes? i guess? ROXY: aight good

Yes John of course you want to stop fighting it

ROXY: then as they told me in the hospital before lil h a was born ROXY: just push

eyeroll, but yeah, of course

> (==>)

Oh cool, sprite form version of her loungewear.

> (==>)

Sorry for my compulsion to post every full-frame image of Roxy in this awesome outfi-WERE YOU KEEPING CALLIOPE UNDER YOUR BED THIS WHOLE TIME?!?????

That’s like... almost a fucking metaphor isn’t it????  For the relationship you preferred in the other timeline and possibly THIS one TOO or

ROXY: hey callieee i got him ROXY: o damn john sorry i shoulda also told u callies here weve been hangin out again ROXY: 1 more freak for ur bean

Oh huh, so this isn’t an always thing.  And these two can get close in more than one timeline where it would’ve worked out nicely.  :)

JOHN: oh it's ok, my bean feels pretty well adjusted to freakage at this point so keep them coming if you like! ROXY: k cool i will JOHN: do i get to know what that big thing under the sheet is? ROXY: hmmmmmm no JOHN: oh ok. JOHN: are you sure? i mean, it seems like a pretty prominent feature of the room. JOHN: space. JOHN: wherever we are. ROXY: and a totally mysterious n COMPLETELY inconspicuous feature it will have to remain for now ROXY: we r kinda in a hurry here fyi ROXY: and by that i mean ROXY: we are in precisely the amount of hurry that means im excused from having to a that specific q rn JOHN: right, sorry. JOHN: i will pay no attention to the object behind the curtain. ROXY: u catch on fast egbert ROXY: anyway theres more cool info coming so just follow me

I don’t have any big theories.  Is it just the Hiveswap device or something?  If Calliope helped with it it’d help explain the Cherubic theme.

> (==>)

JOHN: so... this is all downstairs? JOHN: it seems like you had a lot of work done. ROXY: well no not x actly ROXY: were in the old meteor JOHN: under the house??? ROXY: ok so ROXY: in hindsight it may have been a bit misleading 2 say like ROXY: "downstairs" ROXY: in reference to a place which is hells of buried underground and may not actually be literally under the house ROXY: but there is no time to explain all that rn john so instead im going to refer u to my adorable little green friend here CALLIOPE: #U_U# ROXY: (hehe) CALLIOPE: *AHEM* CALLIOPE: hi john! CALLIOPE: long time no see. ^u^

Cherubs just really like dark cavelike places full of weird tech don’t they.

> (==>)

THEY’RE SO CUTE

JOHN: oh, uh. hey callie! JOHN: it sure has been a while huh. JOHN: now that i think about it, the last time the three of us hung out like this... CALLIOPE: was when i was aggressively third wheeling yoUr prenUptial coUrtship? CALLIOPE: if yoU dont mind, john, i'd rather not rehash that period of oUr lives. CALLIOPE: it was more than a little painfUl for me. JOHN: oh. JOHN: god, jeez, i'm sorry. i didn't mean to-- CALLIOPE: hee hee john i am only pUlling yoUr leg, don't worry. CALLIOPE: if anything i was personally a little thrilled with how things shook oUt in that respect. CALLIOPE: imagine, if yoU will, a yoUng cherUb raised in solitUde, whose only solace was the convolUted and tUmUltUoUs romantic schemata she projected onto her only friends from another Universe. CALLIOPE: and then fUrther imagine that this yoUng cherUb, throUgh varioUs even *more* convolUted contrivances, ended Up in the company of those selfsafe friends as an eqUal participant in their sphere of social discoUrse! CALLIOPE: it is a joy the like of which yoU possibly cannot fathom. u_u

Reinforcing that things turning out this way was in fact the FANTASY that Calliope was writing over in the Canon timeline.  Just, heavily, HEAVILY implied that the Candy timeline is -- or at least originated as -- Calliope’s fanfiction as a Muse of Space, and its competition for audience interest with canon is the essential conflict between alt!Calliope and Dirk (or Dirk and Andrew Hussie).

CALLIOPE: so to pUt it simply, getting to experience sUch emotional drama myself was an impossibly enriching experience. CALLIOPE: possibly a first for my species! CALLIOPE: it's actUally qUite interesting, if yoU ROXY: *nudge* CALLIOPE: oh, right. yes. i'm getting a little carried away, haha. CALLIOPE: argh, i'm sorry, this is not how i planned to begin this vital conversation.

Vital conversation?  What sorta truth-bombs are coming?

CALLIOPE: but to sUmmarise, what i was trying to say is: CALLIOPE: don't beat yourself Up aboUt it john. CALLIOPE: besides, hUman divorces are even more fascinating than i had ever imagined, and being able to witness yoUrs in motion was an honoUr. CALLIOPE: so i consider Us aboUt even at this point. JOHN: hahaha!!! JOHN: okay, well that's good to know! CALLIOPE: ^u^

Holy SHIT that was savage!  And we’ll NEVER know whether or not she really intended it so savagely, either.~

JOHN: so um... JOHN: i hear that there's this big secret thing you wanna tell me about? CALLIOPE: oh right, yes of course! CALLIOPE: let me jUst say first of all how thrilled i am that yoU're on board. CALLIOPE: i wasn't sUre if yoUr natUral inclinations woUld have preclUded yoUr coming to such a place as this, and yet here yoU are. CALLIOPE: this whole endeavoUr will be *so* mUch easier with yoUr help.

Uh oh.

Hopefully babies aren’t involved.

JOHN: oh! well, shucks. JOHN: not really sure what that means but i'm just glad to be of use somewhere, haha. JOHN: which, speaking of somewhere, CALLIOPE: ah right, right. yoU're probably a little cUrioUs as to where the dickens we are. CALLIOPE: how much do yoU know aboUt black holes? JOHN: um... like, the big space things? CALLIOPE: they aren't always big actUally, and in fact their relative smallness is practically their defining qUality. JOHN: oh. CALLIOPE: bUt okay i think we are on the same page. CALLIOPE: so, what if i told yoU that we are inside of a black hole right now.

Oh dear, we’re getting into the canon/noncanon divide?

JOHN: um... JOHN: like, HERE? JOHN: we just transportalized into a black hole? CALLIOPE: no, i mean, what if oUr whole WORLD was inside a black hole. JOHN: ok.

Yeah, that’s gonna be John’s reaction.  “ok.”  Pretty much inevitable.

CALLIOPE: earth c, or at least oUr version of it, has, from the moment we crossed the victory threshold, been inside a black hole. JOHN: ok. CALLIOPE: and not just any black hole, bUt the very black hole in which the green sUn Ultimately met its demise, allowing oUr victory in the first instance! JOHN: huh! ROXY: ("huh!") ROXY: (rofl my fucking ao egbert) JOHN: (shhhh!)

And Roxy enjoys his non-reaction reactions as much as we do, hehe.

CALLIOPE: bUt, paradoxically, the critical moment which determined its capture within the black hole happened *after* that point. CALLIOPE: i refer of coUrse to yoUr decision not to retUrn to the mediUm and fight my brother. JOHN: wait, wait. JOHN: you mean, the meat and candy thing? JOHN: oh my god. JOHN: you mean i actually DID make a mistake that day. CALLIOPE: well, that's not exactly what that-- JOHN: ugh, i fucking KNEW it! JOHN: i'm so sorry. JOHN: i'm so sorry that i put the earth inside a black hole everyone. ): ROXY: john ROXY: listen ROXY: u have got to get out of this mindset i am begging you JOHN: ):

Yeah shake him out of this shit.

ROXY: your choice literally didnt matter ROXY: the whole thing was symbolic in the first place ROXY: literally symbolic in the case of the picnic i mean come on ROXY: it was just some steak and a plate of candy suckers JOHN: oh. CALLIOPE: i mean, i wouldn't go so far as to say that the meal we shared was unimportant, given the sacred significance of the two options i presented. CALLIOPE: but yes, yoUr choice of snack was infinitely less important than the choice which it presaged. CALLIOPE: and even then, calling it a choice woUld be sorely misleading. CALLIOPE: think of it like a coin flip. CALLIOPE: the series of events that led to Us being trapped beyond the event horizon of an Ubermassive black hole could be considered "tails", while the events which would have occUrred otherwise could be considered "heads". CALLIOPE: since both were possible, and paradox space is the way it is, they actUally both happened. and we jUst "happened" (hee hee) to get tails instead of heads. JOHN: you mean we ended up with the bad possibility. CALLIOPE: not at all! since both possibilities depend on one another's existence, it really doesn't make sense to call them "right" or "wrong". they both just "are". JOHN: o...kay... CALLIOPE: u_u

Yeah, it’s going to take a bit more than that to convince him he didn’t make the “wrong decision”.

CALLIOPE: i realise that this may be a lot to process. CALLIOPE: it's easy to forget that this wasn't obvioUs to everyone from the beginning. CALLIOPE: anyway, the reason i went on this tangent in the first place was to explain that the space we are standing in right now has a special significance, in that it is the location which corresponds to the black hole's singUlarity. JOHN: oh, wow. JOHN: um. JOHN: ok so, sorry if this is a dumb question to ask suddenly, but what does being inside of a black hole actually... mean for us? JOHN: is that bad? JOHN: is it like in movie, um, JOHN: shoot. JOHN: roxy what was that matthew mcconaughey movie from your earth that we watched? ROXY: u mean interstellar JOHN: RIGHT. JOHN: the one with the organ. JOHN: man. i cried at that movie so much. ROXY: lol u can say that again ROXY: iirc at least part of y u got so weepy was the fact that u couldnt believe a version of earth existed where ppl got 2 watch more mcconaughey films than you JOHN: listen. JOHN: i simply don't think you all appreciated the gift you were given. CALLIOPE: i don't believe i'm familiar with this particular film ^u^;; ROXY: oh dont worry cal you didnt miss much JOHN: (gasp)

This is all gold

ROXY: but the important point is that no its not really an interstellar type situation here egbert ROXY: ur not gonna enter a weird time vortex and change the trajectory of a little girls life with the power of love JOHN: aw.

Dammit, now we have to be on the lookout for that possibility.  Or it did sort of already happen more than once to John.  ...Whatever.

CALLIOPE: to go back to your original question, john. CALLIOPE: it's not strictly speaking "bad" for Us to be inside of a black hole, mUch thoUgh that contradicts most of what anyone knows about them. CALLIOPE: of coUrse, if we had fallen into it, that woUld be a whole other kettle of fish. CALLIOPE: the tidal forces woUld have stretched Us all into spaghetti and then ripped us apart! CALLIOPE: bUt the natUre of oUr arrival was more akin to simply "being" here, sUddenly. one moment we were not, and the next moment we were, and somehow always had been. CALLIOPE: in everyday, practical terms, being inside of a black hole has very little bearing on Us. CALLIOPE: i mean, the natUre of space and time is a little finicky in here, bUt for the most part it doesn't seem to be anything too oUt of the ordinary. CALLIOPE: bUt beyond that, it means that we are sealed away from the rest of existence. CALLIOPE: oUr sphere of inflUence is limited to the sphere of the black hole's bounding horizon. CALLIOPE: as far as everyone else is concerned, we might as well not even exist! JOHN: is there no way we could let anyone know that we're in here...? CALLIOPE: almost certainly not!

No?  So this doesn’t have to do with the divide?

CALLIOPE: there are very few ways for anything to escape the kind of predicament that we are in right now. one of them is to be an all-powerfUl being with control over the very fabric of space, with the energy of two Universes at yoUr disposal. CALLIOPE: in which case, escape woUld become rather trivial, if a little Unscientific. JOHN: ok. i am going to assume that we can't just do that. CALLIOPE: yoU've hit the nail on the head, UnfortUnately. U_U CALLIOPE: the method i described was the one employed by my alternate self, who yoU may recall crashed through the event horizon in the body that once belonged to jade harley. CALLIOPE: she departed through a pUnctUre she created in the black hole's surface shortly after consUming my brother, a deed which provided her with the necessary "oomph", and which was frankly rather breathtaking to watch. =u= CALLIOPE: bUt Upon her departUre, the rift closed for good. as far as i can see, there's simply no way for Us to commUnicate with the world oUtside the black hole.

What the heck?  Calliope SAW all this?  Is this her Muse powers at work, letting her observe these things, or was she there?  And John certainly did NOT see ANY of what Calliope just said happen.

CALLIOPE: i woUld certainly be very sUrprised to find oUt that anyone had managed sUch a thing!

So we’re going to find that out if we haven’t already.  Maybe something to do with the way Vrissy just conks out narcoleptically?

JOHN: ...right. JOHN: so... let me just get this straight. JOHN: knowing that we're inside of a black hole... does that actually change anything? JOHN: like, can't we just go on living like normal? CALLIOPE: oh absolUtely not. CALLIOPE: i don't know if yoU've noticed john bUt this world is on the brink of a total cataclysm. JOHN: oh.

Um, what?

CALLIOPE: oUr exclUsion from the overarching coUrse of events which governs all reality means that oUr existence here is liable to dramatic and violent Upheaval. CALLIOPE: to pUt it another way, becaUse nothing in here "matters", we are likely to be sUbjected to things which are a bit bats in the belfry, for no reason other than it's totally insignificant to the wider canon of reality. CALLIOPE: and mUch thoUgh i am personally titillated by some of the conseqUences of this predicament, it is a degrading way for Us to live. u_u JOHN: that's... certainly one way to put it, yeah...

No plot-armor for your entire timeline, I guess, yep.  Outside of canon, we can imagine and write about ANYTHING happening to the characters, or just drop their existence entirely, much like a doomed offshoot timeline.  It’s a plot stability that depended heavily on the threat of Lord English and being trapped in a story, and without it things are bound to see a BIT chaotic (or “degrading” if you view it as subjected to the whims of fanfic writers, certainly).

CALLIOPE: at first, i believed that this was simply necessary. Us playing tails to oUr coUnterparts' heads, the black to their white, and so forth. CALLIOPE: bUt over the years i have come to the conclUsion that this is simply not kosher. ROXY: its total bs is what it is CALLIOPE: right, yes. CALLIOPE: a steaming pile of bUllshite. CALLIOPE: and so we have decided that something needs to be done aboUt it.

Ah fuck.  You’re going to regulate non-canon?  “Canonize” it?  Is the fact that you eventually succeed at whatever it is you’re trying to do part of why we have the story presented to us in this bifurcated structure?

ROXY: this is finally where u come in jegbert ROXY: we gots quests for yous CALLIOPE: hee hee, yes. CALLIOPE: or *a* quest, to be specific. JOHN: oh boy! ROXY: (this fkin nerd i s2g)

Roxy and Calliope setting him on this quest as a Rogue of Void and a Muse of Space feels fitting.

JOHN: i'm not sure how i can go about freeing us from a hellish space prison, but i'm up for giving it a try i guess? JOHN: i have... literally nothing better to be doing at this point. except for maybe hanging out with harry anderson. ROXY: nice save lol

YEAH WE’RE STILL GLOSSING OVER HOW YOU LEFT HIM UNPROTECTED, JERK

ROXY: but u dont need to worry abt busting us outta space jail tbh ROXY: thats not ur problem to fix JOHN: oh. JOHN: i'm... not sure i follow, then. ROXY: i mean yeah ur gonna obvs facilitate it in a sense ROXY: but only by going and busting the person who can actually help us outta normal earth jail CALLIOPE: we need yoU to free vriska from the clUtches of oUr misgUided friend jane, and bring her here, to the singUlarity. ROXY: weve been calling it the plot point CALLIOPE: yes, the plot point is a key part of oUr plan. CALLIOPE: as far as we have been able to sUrmise, the only remaining method for escaping oUr grim confinement depends on leveraging the UniqUe properties of this location to create an event of sUch catalcysmic proportions that it simply cannot be contained within the black hole any more. CALLIOPE: something SO dramatic, so hyper-relevant, that it becomes ontologically impossible for anyone to ignore it. CALLIOPE: for that, we need an individUal of sUfficient narrative cloUt, so to speak. CALLIOPE: and to liberate her, who better than the embodiment of the aspect of freedom itself? CALLIOPE: ... CALLIOPE: phew. okay, i'm finished. CALLIOPE: CALLIOPE: sorry, that took longer than i expected to go throUgh.

..............................

OOooooh, kay.

Whatever this is, it’s going to be really weird and PROBABLY infuriating and/or shippy, and I’m probably not going to like it.  Plus it seems like it’s some sort of inverse belated canonization of some other black-hole-rescue theories I went on about at some point.  Although, related to that link, “aspect of freedom” if anyone wasn’t paying attention!  That’s a (sorta-)canon mention of the purpose of it!

They’re going to attention-wh-- attention-hog themselves out of the black hole so that they’re “considered canon” too, or close enough.  Huh.

ROXY: what r u talking about cals that was great ROXY: i could listen 2 u plotsplain for years CALLIOPE: oh you >u< ROXY: fyi this was why i wanted u to get a move on eggbread ROXY: so callie could have more time 2 infodump ROXY: thats love bitchhhhhh JOHN: hahaha. JOHN: ok, well, i think i understood all that?

Love with who? Callie, John, both?

In reality, John isn’t sure what most of this means. But on balance, it feels okay? He’s gone back and forth about a hundred times in the last week about where his place in everything is, so he might as well ride this out. Plus, the last time a Lalonde kind of told him to do something, he thinks that he chose not to, and look where that got him. And it’s not like he has other plans. He may as well do this! It’s at least going to get him involved in things again, if nothing else. He turns to go, and then hears a sound. It’s the sound of feet and knocking on doors, echoed through stone and digital static.

Oh shit.  Is Andrew trapped behind some fourth walls behind the curtains.

> (==>)

Oh RIGHT also that DEVICE is where they want to bring Vriska.  Are they going to overturn part of canon itself with a super-retcon thus making this timeline unbelievably relevant or--?  Maybe make all the PESTERQUESTS canon or something?!  I don’t know.  Maybe they’re INTENTIONALLY starting the game like Vriska wanted to??????

Guh, this is something so big that I don’t WANT to theorize about it, do I.

JOHN: did you hear that? ROXY: wha ROXY: oh yeah uh ROXY: i may have messaged rose and kan and jade to check on them too ROXY: so its prob onea them showin up ROXY: they don’t need to know bout all this tho ROXY: we got time to chat with them b4 u go get vriska

No, even if it’s a knock at the somehow-top-level-house-even-under-buried-- oh, right, maybe it’s covering in part a monitoring system that looks up there.  But still, part of that sound was DOUBTLESS these two hiding something, all standing in front of the curtain like that.

JOHN: i’ll go stall em. ROXY: thx babe ROXY: oh is it 2 soon for that joke or JOHN: no, weirdly enough, that one’s fine. ROXY: oh good ok see u up there soon!

How is calling your significant other “babe” not cool REGARDLESS of gender?!  Like wasn’t that always cool? --Oh wait is it because they’re not together or... but... guh, I don’t know.

Anyway, see y’all after the holidays at least.