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lumidark166 · 10 months ago

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Alpas AU

Warning: This AU contains depression, suicid3 themes, and torture?????? (it’s only once)

If this AU in Ao3, the tags probs: It's Get Worse Before Get Better, Depressed Sougo, Tokiwa Sougo Need Therapy, Sougo Pull a Mei from Honkai Impact but worse, Theater Kid Sougo, Angst with A Happy Ending, the ending is not too happy though but at least it’s a good ending, Unreliable Author, I am so sorry Sougo but it is my duty as the President of Angst to make you suffer, Time Travel. Time Loop

Very Inspired by the HSHTNEP verse by @narashikari, Kagerou Daze song, My R song, Project Sekai, Honkai Impact 3rd, Honkai Star Rail, and Bungou Stray Dogs.

Alpas mean is to break free

In this AU basically, Sougo has to force himself to use his time powers to fix the villain mess, become a Homura but less bad (he is still sane but still needs therapy), also pull a Mei

Sorry if this not making sense at all, I forgot most Zi-O lore cause I hate it with my every being, just not the main characters but that hypocritical of me cause most of my AUs tend to not make sense. Also, i kinda rewrote the whole Evil Sougo here cause he so lacking in canon that i changed him a bit too cryptic but still a bad guy nonetheless. Also this AU kinda made it in my dream and I just had to continue it cause its ruined my concentration in class lol. (also the angst probably from my projection to my comfort charas so i am so sorry about that too)

If you want to know more about this AU, you can ask me like with the ask blog features lol.

Before we start how the AU happened, I need to explain that this AU is kind of different than canon or just the basic HCs of this AU

Basic Hcs: 1. The Main Riders have found a family joke but turn real (Mom and Dad are Emu and Shinnosuke, the kids are Takeru, Sougo, Ikki, and Houtaro, and the uncles and the aunts are the rest of the riders), Sougo is a theater kid beside he can do ballet, Sougo is a history nerd, Sougo in the past being bullied before because he wants to be a king in middle school before high school so he never talks about it openly again. And how do they meet together? Let's say because of the crossover movies, sometimes they meet for a reunion or fight for a world-ending fate again or beat up Tsukasa lol.

The summary of AU: some new villains want Sougo back to being an evil king to destroy other riders, and they do it by changing the past or rather trying to kill the main riders in the past, Sougo knows this by someone trying to warn him and use his time powers despite he trying not to use his time powers other than time-stopping, that someone also said to never said this anyone even Geiz and Tsukuyomi or he get the biggest regret of his life. Sougo has to force himself to use his time powers to the past to stop the villain while making the past riders not know what he is so he makes a somewhat villain persona for it. He also changes his style for this he even changes his hairstyle and clothes so no one knows it's him. Also, that someone is Hiden Atsuya, a future adopted kid of Fuwa x Aruto who secretly helps break Sougo's fate since these villains are from his timeline and other future kids.

This timeline is in 2024, meaning Houtaro is here too and Sougo is 24 years old.

His villain persona: not too talkative unless he wants to talk cause he doesn't want to give hints from the future, very quiet, very stoic, he is a good person but his persona feels like a quiet jerk, this persona is inspired by his mentor and dad figure, Tsukasa Kadoya.

For example :

Past!Shoutaro: Hey, who are you?

A!Sougo: ….

Shoutaro: Answer me!

A! Sougo, quietly said:…Protect your loved ones to your heart, Hidari-san…

His appearance disguised is his hair braided on his left side, has a lot of bandages on his right eye, and sometimes wears a hat sometimes not, his clothes are black/blue pants overall with a double layer of white/grey shirt. Sougo wears a pair of worn-out black combat boots as part of his disguised persona.

Sougo starts this journey is very optimistic but also wary cause he doing this alone this time, after several loops where he fails a lot of times and has to use his time to rewind the past to normal but he has to make the past riders forget his existence in the past and kinda losing it so when in 23rd loop, he tells to Geiz and Tsukuyomi but unfortunately, like the kid tell him.. It did make something bad happen like a world-ending scenario. He hates to see the dead body of his mentor lying on the ground, he hates to see his older brother's dead body near a river, he hates to see his parental figures' bodies lying on the streets, and he blanks out when he sees his lover's dead bodies. After that loop, his eyes start to dull but anyone in the present doesn't notice Sougo's weirdness until the 50th loop.

Sougo routine most of the time now is present timeline-past-go back to the present timeline so everyone becomes suspicious that Sougo suddenly disappeared most of the day (surprisingly they noticed after the 49th loop cause Sougo can act very well) to encounter this, Sougo made to redo the first day when he starts to go to past to prevent the villains and that day be his ‘checkpoint’ so anyone not sus about it.

The villains are psychopaths, they claim that they are very loyal to Oma Zi-O than to Time Jackers. They tried to do the same thing to Sougo’s daughter but she was very stubborn and the villains came in a bad timing like literally the baddest timing ever when her dads, her mom, her Nana Emu, Grandpa Shinnosuke, and other granduncles riders out there. So they had to resort to another plan, which made Sougo's life miserable to make him guilty of the villains so he forced himself to give in to the fate he had to face years ago.

1-22nd loop!Sougo: still optimistic but after some loops, he is kinda tired about it. This whole shit made him eat less but not too less, he was just not very in the mood to eat.

23rd-80th loop!Sougo: His eyes became dull, lost his sense of taste, got tortured by the same villain via the electric chair, and had to kill the said villain, always on the run then going home, sometimes getting a mental breakdown of what he did, he feels guilty to have erased his senpai and kouhai memories too much also kill someone. In mid of the 60th loop, he has hallucinations and nightmares of his senpai.

81-99th loop! Sougo: Lost his mind but his sanity is still intact, he somewhat embraces fate but at the same time does not, he reaches out to his bad future self, Oma Zi-O to give him the true potential of his powers despite his chances of being an evil king will greatly increase and his future self surprisingly give him. He plans for his own king's ‘execution’ after this whole thing is done. Also the villains found out to break the time loops mind erasing shit at 85th loop and the Riders demand answers from Sougo sometimes leading to fighting, Sougo had to force himself wrapped by his villain persona and get up but at one time he break his persona once. He mutters that he rather save them than not do anything about it so he calls himself a sinner or a liar once he defeats Geiz and Tsukuyomi.

I don't know what to explain anymore so i write the all WIPs of minific or/and songfics that I thought of, and not in chronological order sorry and sorry i totally take some HoT convo from chapter 17, sorry for the ooc and not making sense in this goddamn AU also sorry of my bad writing:

“I think this is the first time you have reached out to me even go to this timeline as well..” Oma Zi-O said, this time, he used a younger body with his left eye bandaged. He looks at Sougo with empty, cold eyes yet his expression doesn't fit him right now

“Are you no longer afraid of these powers?…” He asked him

“I don’t know.. I feel I am not afraid anymore ever since 81st loop” (Sougo)

“If you continue to tread this path, you will find yourself falling deeper into the abyss” warned Oma Zi-O

“……I don’t care, I will take care of it all” Sougo replied

“You will lose everything, your family and friends will no longer trust you” (Oma Zi-O)

“It’s doesn’t matter to me anymore, I always alone..” Sougo replied he embraced the fact he always going to be alone.

“You will leave them forever..”

“…”

"You won't be around them anymore, see their smiles, or hold their hands."

“It’s okay, I already know what I am getting into…”

“There is no turning back once you get into this path, are you sure is this your choice? ”

“It’s doesn’t matter… Senpai will take care of them but this is something I must do.. I already made my choice”

“Then so be it..” Oma Zi-O gives Sougo the true potential of his powers.

Tsukasa looks at Sougo with deep rage. Sougo’s eyes were in horror. Shit, keep calm Sougo.. Keep your goddamn persona in check!

Mama, ooh

I don't wanna die

Sougo feels Tsukasa’s weapon at his head. Sougo’s trying not to cry. “Now, Sougo.. Tell me, why are you doing this?..” His voice is empty, cold. Clearly, He doesn’t trust Sougo right now. Sougo’s eyes become dull. Shoutaro noticed this and is now worried for Sougo.

I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all

Sougo got saved by his bike that actually can ride on its own, is his bike sentient or something??

Tsukasa, Shoutaro and Shinnosuke suddenly got summoned to future by Oma Zi-O.

“What do you want..” Shoutaro asked

“…………Make sure to watch my younger self back”

“Eh?” Shinnosuke was shocked.

“What do you mean by this?…” Tsukasa asked

“I'm just curious about his future after all, if it ends up with him being evil king again.. It will be just boring and… Every evil king always gets executed in the end” And at the right moment, a guillotine drops. The three riders jumped a bit and now realized what the evil king meant.

“Sougo planned to end this once and for all, and by that… He plans his execution”

“Huh, I didn't know you could care, why do you ask us this..” (Tsukasa)

4. (More of a summary than a fanfic but yeah) also this like the end of 100th loop

Finally, Sougo did it and defeated the villains on his own at least this time didn’t kill anyone and let the future kids handle them. Now, he is on top of a building, the tallest building in the city. He can finally execute his execution. He can wipe his timeline that made him an evil king but the idea of living scared him like what if this fate gets him again, watch his loved ones suffer from his fate, he just rather disappear and never come back. Sougo takes out his braid and the bandages off then takes the final leap.

The songs that fit Sougos:

He closed his eyes until someone took his hand in that fall, it was Takeru. Sougo in shock and scared, why did Takeru follow him, he didn't want Takeru dying with him, it was supposed to be his ‘execution’ not Takeru too. He realized he made Takeru cry, he felt guilty he was the reason that he crying right now. He doesn't realize that he is being saved by Inves plant and passes out when Takeru and him back to the rooftop.

5. (totally take this from Honkai Impact)

Sougo put Geiz's unconscious body to the wall. "You and Tsuku saved me from that fate, so i return the favor. If saving you is a sin then i'ii be the sinner..." Then Sougo left.

Kamen Rider after 100th loop to Sougo be like : Deichuu ni Saku

1-22nd loop!Sougo: Nomad, Twilight Light, Non-breath Oblige

23-80th loop!Sougo : Hated by Life Itself, Samsa

81-100th loop! Sougo : Honkai World Diva, Gehenna, Phony, Self-Inflicted Achromatic

After the whole shit : Reborn

I kinda made their roles when they sing it so sorry if it doesn't fit them

Unable to filter the pieces of our broken hearts, (Shoutaro)

Our tears gently dried up,

Unable to shed another drop. (Eiji)

"That's funny, isn't it?" we laugh…(Gentaro)

A difficult life, Maze-like brambles that obstruct you. (Kouta)

The darkness of this corrupt world blocks your path. (Tsukasa)

Ah, you're someone who's more depressed than anyone else.

So, right now, We're probably on the verge of drowning, (Takeru)

Saved by breathing correctly. (Emu)

Now, we simply live for the sake of dying someday.

When we realise why we dislike rain (Philip)

Deep down, we remember

That large soap bubbles

Must be really soft and fluffy.

While looking at every color on the ground (Shinnosuke)

We make sure to walk where there are no puddles.

Surely, you too, would resort to self-defence

If you could avoid a difficult path.

Right now, I am human; (Everyone)

Today, tomorrow too, and the day after that

It's enough to admit it,

Everyone takes in different breaths.

Lalala…

But you too are human, (Emu)

You just hate being one, that's all.

But you can't hate it, because you're a kind person,

You're that someone who would pray for just about anyone.

It takes, for a single blossom to scatter, (Aruto)

Water, earth, sunlight and its own seed

Whatever lies right in front of me,

Its meaning, past and future,

If a single one of those were missing, nothing would be born:(Touma)

Not me, not you, and neither that person.

“It’s nothing” -

I say as I burden you with my past.

Destiny getting in your way. (Tsukasa)

You reap what you sow.

But because this situation is unpleasant,

You want to run away, right? You want to live, right?

If there is a moment (Emu)

Where you feel like throwing yourself,

Cleave through the darkness of this world, (Shoutaro and Philip)

And let us search for the reason you were born.

The beginning at the end, (Takeru)

Once it begins, it will be your final life.

At the end of an endless journey (Shinnosuke)

There must be a "time" where it's now or never.

"It's impossible to drown in the rain", (Eiji)

Even so, it feels like it's hard to breathe.

“We live for the sake of dying someday”, (Emu sing this but its meant to sing it that someone said it)

If that is so, if that is so, (Everyone)

We'll never break again. Never. Never. Never (Ace)

Let the unbroken bells of our hearts resound

Everything will be covered by dark clouds (Haruto)

And smeared with mud.

Sorry if this doesnt make sense/weird-

Let us draw a line inside the maze (Kouta)

That obstructs the path of the world now. (Touma)

This line will be the overlapping map, (Geiz)

That flower that blooms for the sake of illuminating you. (Tsukuyomi)

That said, what if Daybreak!Houtaro meet this Sougo :

D!Houtaro : Sougo-san.. why you want to end yourself this way

A!Sougo : You will never understand my reason (he knows he completely losing it cause tbf, he seen a lot of loops where his family and friends died so yeah)

Tag : @maou-the-tree

#Alpas #kamen rider #Kamen rider au #Tokiwa Sougo #ngl i kinda rushed at the end lol #maybe later to include the future kids lmao #lumi rambles in the tags again #lumi rambles #kamen rider zi-o #kamen rider zi o

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almaqead · 8 months ago

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"The Handful." From Surah Al Anfal, "The Spoils."

Ramadan Day 22

The world has not yet been expunged of the Republican Party or its devil god Donald Trump, who is expected to empty the prisons with mass pardons for former terrorists, activists, and insane persons to be used in his conquest of the free world.

Muhammad left behind specific instructions about circumstances such as these:

From Ibrahim 14: 42-45:

And never think that Allah is unaware of what the wrongdoers do.He only delays them for a Day when eyes will stare [in horror]. rushing forth, heads raised, never blinking, hearts void, And warn the people of the Day when the punishment will overtake ˹the wicked among˺ them, and the wrongdoers will cry, “Our Lord! Delay us for a little while. We will respond to Your call and follow the messengers!” ˹It will be said,˺ “Did you not swear before that you would never be removed ˹to the next life˺?” You passed by the ruins of those ˹destroyed peoples˺ who had wronged themselves.1 It was made clear to you how We dealt with them, and We gave you ˹many˺ examples.

All Believers on this planet must combine their voices and their wills: Donald Trump, the Republican Party, the Mormons, Evangelicals, Scientologists and Pro-Lifers must be stopped, dead in their tracks. Under no circumstances can they be permitted to sieze state power, they must never have it ever again.

8:11-18:

˹Remember˺ when He caused drowsiness to overcome you, giving you serenity.1 And He sent down rain from the sky to purify you, free you from Satan’s whispers, strengthen your hearts, and make ˹your˺ steps firm.

˹Remember, O Prophet,˺ when your Lord revealed to the angels, “I am with you. So make the believers stand firm. I will cast horror into the hearts of the disbelievers. So strike their necks and strike their fingertips.”

This is because they defied Allah and His Messenger. And whoever defies Allah and His Messenger, then ˹know that˺ Allah is surely severe in punishment.

That ˹worldly punishment˺ is yours, so taste it! Then the disbelievers will suffer the torment of the Fire.

O believers! When you face the disbelievers in battle, never turn your backs to them.

And whoever does so on such an occasion—unless it is a manoeuvre or to join their own troops—will earn the displeasure of Allah, and their home will be Hell. What an evil destination!

It was not you ˹believers˺ who killed them, but it was Allah Who did so. Nor was it you ˹O Prophet˺ who threw ˹a handful of sand at the disbelievers��,1 but it was Allah Who did so, rendering the believers a great favour. Surely Allah is All-Hearing, All-Knowing.

As such, Allah frustrates the evil plans of the disbelievers.

Commentary:

President Biden and the Department of Justice are playing with fire. Something has to be done. A clear message must be sent to the American Government: a future Donald Trump presidency and the ongoing existence of the Republican Party are not options.

An unified Muslim community would change history, it would unite Israel, it would save lives, it would bring never before seen levels of peace and prosperity to this world. But first, the Enemy must be dealt with, or the Peace of Jerusalem shall never return.

Joe Biden must be made to stop campaigning for president, debating the future of this world with that diabolic and tell the truth. Donald Trump is a traitor, a pedophile, a rapist, a murderer, and a war criminal and it is time the world avenged itself upon him and the diabolic estate that created him.

"This evil must be faced. As such, Allah frustrates the evil plans of the disbelievers."

The Value in Gematria, found in verse 8:17:

It was not you ˹believers˺ who killed them, but it was Allah Who did so. Nor was it you ˹O Prophet˺ who threw ˹a handful of sand at the disbelievers˺,1 but it was Allah Who did so...

The Number is 15671, אבו זה, abu za, "You have to want this."

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bookoformon · 9 months ago

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Mormon Chapter 2, Part 3. "The Understanding."

Every term in Hebrew has an up and a down. Earlier in the Book of Mormon we met a King Noah who was not a good man like the Noah named in the Torah. Noah's positive definition is "respite", the negative form is "downpour, falling down."

Now we encounter a Lamanite King named Aaron. Aaron means "Who exalts God." The negative form means "like a wild mountain goat."

The cheerful verb רנן (ranan) means to produce a ringing cry, either out of joyous cheer, distress or to introduce a declaration of some sort. Nouns רן (ron), רנה (rinna) and רננה (renana) all describe ringing cries. Plural noun רננים (renanim) refers to birds that deliver piercing cries.

The unused verb ארן ('aran) appears to have meant to be nimble, agile, or even high up or aroused, and in cognate languages it yields a noun for a kind of wild mountain goat.

The Scripture states an Evil Aaron comes against the people and there is a lament, "no one could keep what was their own." Keeping to one's own legal way of life is the greatest gift of God a man can obtain. It opens the world up to him and he in turn forges a path others need to learn how to recognize on their own.

This path is becoming blurrier in today's world. Too many corrupt politicians like the Republicans and their rabid followers are trying to wipe it away, and too few noble politicians are wielding the laws that protect it appropriately.

Evil men like the Republicans do not repent of the diabolical things they do. This is not even an option for them at this point in time, their crimes are too deep and too long. The repentence has to come from persons like President Biden and Steny Hoyer and the rest who are not enforcing the law, allowing the Republicans to gather and meet, to promote Pro-Life and anti-human rights measures that are forbidden by law. Their names are not legally permitted on ballots as a result, but still they are.

We shall never be free, not a single human being, plant, or animal until the Republican Party is burnt to ash. So this repentence by its opponents is one of the most important acts that will take place in human history.

If this is not done, o how we shall all be sorry.

9 And now, the Lamanites had a king, and his name was Aaron; and he came against us with an army of forty and four thousand. And behold, I withstood him with forty and two thousand.

And it came to pass that I beat him with my army that he fled before me. And behold, all this was done, and three hundred and thirty years had passed away.

10 And it came to pass that the Nephites began to repent of their iniquity, and began to cry even as had been prophesied by Samuel the prophet [see Helaman 13]; for behold no man could keep that which was his own, for the thieves, and the robbers, and the murderers, and the magic art, and the witchcraft which was in the land.

11 Thus there began to be a mourning and a lamentation in all the land because of these things, and more especially among the people of Nephi.

The Values in Gematria are:

v. 9a: An army consists of students of the Torah who feel compelled to obey its Instructions and stamp out evil in the world. An evil army Numbered 44,000 promotes it, and the verse features one, Numbered 42,000 that opposes it.

The Value in Gematria is 11427, יא‎דבז‎‎, yadavz, "The hand and the eye of reproach."

v. 9b: Three hundred and thirty years passed away. The Value in Gematria is 8294, חב‎טד‎ "Indebted to the hit, he batted."

Persons who are grateful to God for the chance to be alive will fight evil persons for the chance to live it their own way.

v. 10: The Nephites repented. The Value in Gematria is 9033, טאֶפֶסג‎ג, tapesgg, "you will understand."

v. 11: Thus began a lamentation. The Value in Gematria is 4241, דבדא‎‎, dabda, "David understood."

If we presume there is more data appearing on the contents of the Nephite Plates, then the former frame says "prosecute the wicked" and this one "reproach with the hand and the eye." The hand is the law, the eye is the Witness, the conscience.

King David was a brutal killer but he gave the Israelites, who nothing, no one, and no home a place to live. He was an imperfect man in many ways, but he was the perfect king.

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binch-i-might-be · 2 years ago

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So, I have a bit of a complicated question about Thin Ice ‘Verse. (Sorry if you have already answered it!)

So, how different is history, exactly? You say that Laurens and Hamilton stayed together, and that he never even got close to marrying Eliza. Does Hamilton still do the same things he did in real history? Did Washington? What did Laurens do? How did people not get suspicious of Hamilton and Laurens? Did Eliza still do the same things she did in real history? (Minus the stuff with trying to preserve Hamilton’s legacy or whatever) did Eliza ever get married? Did she have children? If so, did any of them die in a duel like Philip or do any of the other things the real Ham kids did? Did anyone preserve Hamilton’s letters? Did Hamilton still die dueling Burr? If not, why?

Sorry if you don’t feel like answering or this is spoilers, but I just had to ask. I’m obsessed with your writing and want to know everything lol

hi!! oh I love when you guys send me questions, especially when they're so in depth because it's just like. omg someone cares about my funny little universe.......

I have touched on some of this in the past already and some answers are actually somewhat of a spoiler for the series, but I'll answer what I can!!

okay, let's start from the top: John and Alex do indeed stay together! Alex finishes his law degree after the war, and he does become secretary of treasury later on due to Gwash's incessant bullying (he was bullied into presidency so now Alex has to suffer with him lmao)

(I will probably not get into it too much in the series tho. I'm not really interested in the politics, and while I might mention their positions as president/secretary, I won't go into it in depth!)

regarding John's future, I think I've actually stated in text what will happen with him :) it was not very subtle (at least I don't think it was) but no one has pointed anything out yet as far as I remember. this also plays into why no one gets suspicious about Two Known Bachelors TM living in semi close quarters together!

alright, time to break my silence on Eliza askjfhaskjhfk

I don't know if you've read the reincarnation au, but in there I've stated that her and Alex didn't really know each other at all and only met a few times. but I've also stated that this is not what I had originally planned for her in the main series, but I was reluctant to reference something I never even so much as mentioned

my Original Vision was introducing her in the second part of Green Eyes which I had to scrap as I barely managed to finish the first part on its own. it wasn't crucial to the story and I wanted to move the plot forward because I was really excited for everything planned for after Green Eyes, so I left it out (for now)

my plan was to have Eliza and Alex meet at a ball and hit it off. this entire part would have been from John's pov, as the first part was entirely from Alex's, and would have involved some delicious delicious angst about John considering Alex's bisexuality and yet again convincing himself he won't be able to give him the life he deserves. that he would be happier with a wife he wouldn't have to live in secret with.

meanwhile Alex and Eliza are just bonding in the background over both being bisexual and also being in love with certified Fools lmao

in the Thin Ice main series, they end up being life long friends! she does get married, and she marries down as she did in history/the musical, probably has a couple kids too. none of them meet their end by duel though, and truth be told, I'm not overly invested in most of the real Ham kids, so I don't know a lot about them

does anyone preserve Hamilton's letters? yeah! Jack's kids :) I think most of his things would fall to them after his death, and they did have great relationships with both him and John, so they would certainly care to preserve his and their shared legacy.

nope! he does not die by Burr. their relationship in this verse is not exactly..... over the top friendly, but they're on good enough terms. my Alex does care about his reputation and legacy, but he's not had to fight for it as hard as musical Ham had, so he's just. a bit more chill. he does fight, he's petty, he gets into arguments in the press, but he's not as obsessive about it as either musical or real Ham. mans just vibing basically!

thank you for the questions! I do always love to ramble on about it, so I'm very happy to get asks like this :))

#hehe :)#i've done some clunky foreshadowing about what john will end up doing! but yeah no one has said anything. i assumed it was too obvious tbh #thin ice 'verse #ask #anon

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kateis-cakeis · 4 years ago

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Would Alivebur Join The Syndicate?

It’s been a question circling in my mind since Techno wrote out the manifesto. Because the Syndicate stands for something very important, not just promoting anarchy, but fighting tyranny.

In all its forms! Sic semper tyrannis. Thus always to tyrants!!

So, what does this mean for Alivebur? Well, his entire story is good to work this out.

From the second he experienced tyranny when all he was doing was making drugs, to the moment he gave everything up, proclaiming that government was not the way to go... Alivebur was fighting against tyrants. That was always his role.

Firstly, I will examine what a 16th of Nov Alivebur would think, then, I will factor in an Alivebur with Ghostbur memoires. So, let’s begin!

To truly see what Alivebur would think, we need to dive into past quotes:

*Sapnap hands over some Blaze rods* “Oh yeah, you can't buy our peace from your tyranny.” - (Wilbur’s The Wall: 7:19, 29th July)

This is the first time tyranny is mentioned, and it’s in reference to Sapnap. After all, he was the one who arrested Tommy, he was the one who tried to stop them, who killed Tommy too. This is when we find out what angle Alivebur is going for - that what happened to him and Tommy was down to tyrants.

Here, Alivebur insinuates the only way to get peace is with revolution and independence. Not from tyrants buying him off.

“Look, Dream isn't our enemy, he's our neighbour. But, we are seceding from his tyrannical rule.” - (Wilbur’s The Wall: 57:34, 29th July)

This is the second time tyranny is mentioned, and the first time it’s directed towards Dream. Alivebur clearly had no beef with him, as he claimed he wasn’t an enemy, but he does claim that Dream is a tyrant. Which, considering what happened to Alivebur, makes sense.

You can also see here that Alivebur didn’t want to fight, see:

“We don’t win wars with battles and with armour. We win wars with our words, Tommy. We’re starting a revolution, not a war.” - (Wilbur’s The Wall: 4:54, 29th July)

and,

“We don't wish for bloodshed, we don't wish for war, we don't wish to show our power in any way, we just want our freedom, we just want emancipation, independence.” - (Wilbur's The Revolution is Coming: 26:02, 2nd Aug)

Alivebur being all about peace is important. He never wanted to fight:

“I’m not a fighter, I’m a writer.” - (Wilbur’s The Wall: 1:48:31, 29th July)

But he was dedicated to fighting tyranny. He just, at first, wished to do it peacefully. And if he joined the Syndicate, he could push for that. Peace over violence.

“He's the one choosing to live with the enemy, with the people who conquered us for so long.” - (Wilbur’s The Wall: 1:29:57, 29th July)

This quote is in reference to Tommy choosing to keep his home, and being conflicted about having a permanent residence in L’Manberg. But it’s not that part I want to focus on, it’s what Alivebur believes. That Dream and co had conquered them ‘for so long’.

You can see here that Alivebur had believed them to be tyranny for a long time, and that they had conquered them. This is important because it shows that Alivebur did indeed want freedom from them. To emancipate.

The first Independence book is another important piece of evidence. Alivebur references tyranny a few times. Calling what the people of the Dream SMP lands did to them tyranny. Saying disregarding their independence is tyranny. Which further proves the fact Alivebur was fighting against that.

But there’s a part of the Independence book that shows Alivebur could easily be open to anarchy, even back in the War:

It’s the second paragraph on page 5 that is important. The right of the people existing above the king, the government, and the economy. For this reason, it’s clear that even a Pre Independence War Alivebur would definitely be open to the Syndicate.

Moving on swiftly to the policies of the POG Party, tyranny is also mentioned there:

‘WE WILL NOT STAND FOR TYRANNY’. The fact that it’s in CAPS is an indicator that Alivebur was very set on this, and was always set on this. Even during the election. This was from an Alivebur scarred by the War and the Final Control Room. It shows he never backed down from fighting tyranny.

Which brings us onto the 16th of November...

“Techno, you've taught me a lot. You've taught me that government is not the way to go. And I agree with you. Everything you've said, I completely agree with you.” - (Wilbur's smithereens: 1:08:20, 16th Nov)

See... this was the first time that Alivebur directly stated that he agreed with Techno, and that governments were not the way to go. And this is possibly the most important quote here.

While it’s important to point out that Alivebur wanted to fight against tyranny from the start, from the revolution to his policies, him saying that he completely agreed with Techno is something else entirely.

What was it they called themselves... anarchy bros? :)

While Alivebur was focused on destroying L’Manberg because it ‘no longer existed’, he definitely was on Techno’s side. Saying that the both of them had won.

For this reason, Alivebur could not only join the Syndicate for its stance against tyranny, but also for its anarchy. After all, this is a guy who was a former President, a former leader of a revolution, the former head of a drug empire (for one day :P). He knows what it’s like to be on the other side, and in the end he chose no government.

He’d be valuable for this knowledge too, but you can see why, in all his fails, it would be easy to draw Alivebur in with anarchy.

Nothing else worked for him, except that one time he truly won in his own eyes, on his own terms, when he turned to Techno’s anarchy.

So, the answer to the question is yes. 100% yes. For the anarchy he eventually agreed with. For fighting tyranny.

---

But

What about Ghostbur?

Now... an Alivebur with Ghostbur memories, that’s a different story entirely.

But is it?

Ghostbur, with his memories and his history books, knows things others have long forgotten. It’s his quotes from the 16th of December that are important to examine here, as it’s the only time he has specifically referenced ideals that Alivebur had.

Freedom. Being against tyranny.

It’s subtle in the way he does it. But it’s important, nonetheless:

“I’m going to go see this cage.” *starts singing the first verse of the anthem* - (Philza’s Just a regular day: 1:17:18, 16th Dec)

This is one of the very subtle quotes. He says he’s going to see the cage, that he said isn’t very conducive to a free environment:

Everyone’s free to do what they want, and live how they want. I don’t think cages are conducive to that environment.” - (Philza’s Just a regular day: 1:08:25, 16th Dec)

And then begins singing the first verse of the L’Manberg anthem. In which the lines include: ‘The brutality and the tyranny of their rulers.’ As if to imply that the cage was tyranny, suggesting that Ghostbur was still heavily against tyranny, but instead of fighting with violence, he was very surely using his words.

Ghostbur calling L’Manberg tyranny is further implied by the following quote:

“I just destroyed the cage, I destroyed the shackles of oppression, I have drained the bog- the mire of injustice, and I have found peace in a land of tyranny!” - (Philza’s Just a regular day: 1:19.47, 16th Dec)

Relating the cage to oppression, injustice, and tyranny, does indeed suggest that despite Ghostbur being notably different to Alivebur, the one thing that stayed constant was his hate for tyranny.

The finding peace in a land of tyranny is interesting, as it suggests that was always c!Wilbur’s goal, peace from tyranny, as I referenced earlier. And my earlier point stands even more so with Ghostbur: If he joined the Syndicate, he could push for doing things peacefully.

However, if Alivebur gets Ghostbur’s memories, he may get an understanding about L’Manberg’s destruction he otherwise wouldn’t have, which could put him at odds with Techno and Phil.

But that also depends on if he remembers what Ghostbur may have forgotten. It is heavily implied he forgot his argument with Phil, but if he remembers it, then, this quote is important:

“I don’t want to hear what you have to say. I don’t want to have to hear what you have to say. I’ve read the history books, Phil. I’ve read the history books. You slayed the dragon, you slayed Alivebur. You are the St George of the Dream SMP. We understand, everyone understands that, Phil. But, look what you’ve done. How can you look at this and still see yourself as a hero. Sending a message, Phil. Sending a message?” - (Wilbur’s First Time Ghostbur Live: 17:58, 6th Jan)

A long quote! I will admit! But it’s an important one. An Alivebur with Ghostbur memories, and this memory in particular, would remember the anguish, remember seeing Phil as a hero for his death, only to denounce him as that, because he was trying to send a message, something Ghostbur categorically disagreed with.

Hell, even Alivebur didn’t do what he did to send a message.

And would an Alivebur with memories still be on Techno’s side?

“I gave Friend to Phil to look after. And Dream found me friend. And Technoblade, he said we were friends. See, people wouldn’t lie about that, would they?” - (Wilbur’s First Time Ghostbur Live: 9:36, 6th Jan)

Ghostbur was hurt. By Phil. By Techno. Even by Dream. And yet he asks that they wouldn’t lie, would they? So with this in mind, Ghostbur would not join the Syndicate.

But an Alivebur with Ghostbur memories? That is so much harder to determine.

With all the evidence, that Alivebur was dedicated to fighting tyranny, and was open to and sided with anarchy, that Ghostbur was still dedicated to being against tyranny, it seems very, very likely that regardless of what he remembers... a resurrected c!Wilbur would be up for joining the Syndicate.

However, an Alivebur with Ghostbur memories could very well choose another side that would fight against tyranny. If he felt too betrayed by Phil and Techno with his Ghostbur memories, he could turn away from them. But if he could move past that, if he talked about it with them, then with all he has said and done, he could still join.

So, for an Alivebur with Ghostbur memories... the answer to the question is... yes but no? It depends what he remembers, how he feels, where his loyalties truly lie. Hell, he could join Fundy instead.

All in all, with everything in mind, c!Wilbur as a whole, as unpredictable as he can be, is dedicated to fighting against tyranny. He agreed with Techno shortly before his death. And even in death, still believed that tyranny had to be challenged. That matters when it comes down to the Syndicate and makes him one day joining very likely.

#dream smp #alivebur #ghostbur #dream smp analysis #i have spent...#about 8-10 hours on this dfjhgjhdfg #between watching streams #collecting evidence #and actually writing the thing #i hope you enjoy this #i think it's very interesting to ponder #since there are similarities in what the Syndicate want to do #and what Alivebur's goals were

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callme-chaos · 3 years ago

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Tommy SMP (DSMP)

H-hello? How did you get in here? Tommy doesn’t usually let randoms in. Uhhhhh lemme just consult the list real quick. What’s your name?

Huh. Doesn’t sound familiar. Buuuuuuut there you are. On the list. What’s your purpose here then, pal?

A tour? Well, the person who usually does the tours is out in the moment… But I guess I could show you around. If you would like to follow me – yeah just ignore the holes and stuff. They’re just remnants of a couple of wars we’ve had.

What kind of wars? Bro, where have you been?

Not from around here? Evidently. Well, first there was the Disk Wars. You see, Dream had these cool disks but Tommy really wanted them, you know? And this is /Tommy SMP/ and not /Dream SMP/ after all so there was all that. Then there was this Quackity kid who tried to start a nation and Tommy didn’t really like the look of that. And so Tommy and this Ranboo guy decided to blow it all up – I don’t remember the details. You see, I’ve been away… uhhhh… travelling so I don’t really see too much of what goes on here. That and I seem to be forgetting a lot of things… I really should fix that-

Huh? You’re confused. Buddy – I haven’t even told you about the Egg yet!

Yeah! An Egg! I can show you it right now actually. Just follow me.

The vines? Yeah! They’re a nice shade of blue but they’re a real pain to cut down, you know? They just seem to grow back stronger. Now, just pop down this hole here – yeah just straight down.

Oh! Ah. I really should have warned you about the fall damage, huh? I’m sure we can pop into George’s bakery later and fix you up. Providing George is in his bakery… He stopped baking a while back.

Why? I don’t actually know. I’m not really too involved in the politics around here (travelling and all that) buuuuut I heard a rumour that him, Ranboo, Charlie Slimecicle and Technoblade have started like a secret club. Not sure exactly what they do but if Ranboo is involved it can’t be good. Anyways! Here’s the Egg. Don’t step too close though – I’ve heard it has some serious manipulative powers. Niki’s best friend Foolish got transformed by it the other day. She was quite upset. I think she runs a cult in the Egg’s honour with Ponk or something now. She’s nice but pretty scary when she wants to be, I’ll tell you that much.

The Egg is giving you weird vibes? Yeah. You and me both. The blue is giving me shivers actually. Shall we continue our tour elsewhere?

Next? Hmmmmm. I know! I’ll take you to Hannah’s castle and museum. They’re a great tourist spot! Follow me.

Yes we have a museum! History has been made here on the SMP, I’ll have you know. This SMP was founded by the Tommy Team made up of the hot-headed, dashingly attractive Fundy; the greatly popular, widely enjoyed Bad Boy Halo; and, of course, the 1000IQ man himself, TommyInnit. Though, Tommy… hasn’t been about much… lately… not since… you know…

Well, if you don’t know I hardly have the time to explain now! (I’ll maybe show you later if we have time…) Anyways! Here we are: Hannah’s museum. This miserable little dark room here is a recreation of L’Manberg’s Final Control Room. Back in the first L’Manberg verses Greater Tommy SMP war, L’Manberg’s founding fathers (Schlatt, Sapnap, President Quackity and Vice President Dream) were all betrayed by a member of their own battalion: Hannah-Rose. They were dark times, kid.

You want to know more about President Quackity and his right hand man Dream? Well, they were incredibly close – practically brothers. They both went through a lot together. Until Quackity finally blew up L’Manberg and was subsequently killed by his own father, Charlie Slimecicle.

I didn’t say they were dark times for nothing, you know? Dream took it harder than anyone. And Tommy took the opportunity to traumatise and manipulate the fella further. Tommy even managed to convince Dream’s best friend, Schlatt, that he was the root of all problems on the SMP.

We couldn’t believe it either. Dream did have one friend, Ranboo, for a while. But they ultimately disagreed on their ideas of justice and went their separate ways.

Sad times, indeed, kid. Anyways, where to next… Oh! Hello, Eret! How are you doing?

Ah. He’s busy. Off being cracked at bed wars I suspect.

What’s the big black building over there?

Uhhhhhhhh… Have you seen HBomb’s hotel? It’s great this time of year! Just this way, matey. Technically it belongs Dream but HBomb briefly took it over. There was some kind of dispute between the two guys – nobody here really takes HBomb that seriously. (Personally, I blame the ancient skin he still wears. Kid really needs an update, you know?)

That? Oh, I suppose you can still see some of the remnants. That used to be Punz’s UFO. Someone blew it up but I’m not entirely sure who…

How do I know it was blown up? Look, I’m just taking Quackity’s word for it.

He did die but then he was recently brought back to life. He spends most of his time with Dream outside Las Nevadas.

Las Nevadas is basically the Tommy SMP version of Las Vegas. It’s pretty cool actually – wanna check it out?

Cool! We’re actually heading in the right direction for that anyways. So, where are you from?

Yeah, I gathered you weren’t from around here but where are you actually from?

…Not gonna tell me? Fine. So be it. You sure are a mystery, huh?

I’m not flirting! I just- I… Ah! Look at that! We’re already here! It’s pretty dramatic, right?

You should see it at night. Everything lights up and it is magnificent.

It belongs to Wilbur. He’s the head honcho around here. He’s here alongside Puffy and Phil. Oh! Speak of the devil, if you squint a little bit you can see Phil down there now, bouncing around. He’s a cutie really – though his puns do get tiresome.

What do you mean “you don’t get tired of puns”?

…Are you human?

…What a terrifying answer. Okay! Moving on!

I’m aware that it’s one of the ugliest structures in existence – but you can’t blame Wilbur and Las Nevadas for /that/ abomination. That’s what Quackity and Dream installed last time they were here together.

I know it’s phallic but you don’t have to say that out loud! Come on, man, have a little class.

That up there? That’s Schlatt and Techno’s “cookie castle” as I like to call it. When Dream was exiled, Schlatt met Techno and they started getting really close. They’re everybody’s favourite couple now. I think it’s a friendship that will last a long time, you know? They seem to have a lot in common.

Like what? Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh They’re both American?

Look, if you know, you know.

Alright! Next – shall we have a change of scenery? Las Nevadas can get quite… heated, so perhaps we can give the snowy biome a visit, yeah? Now, when we get there it’s important to tread carefully: the forest is enchanted, practically everything there will eat you and, worst of all… Ranboo lives out there.

Ranboo? He’s a terrifying force of nature. I heard he slayed an entire army all by himself, owns a pet polar bear and he helped Tommy take down the entirety of L’Manberg. Ranboo and Tommy – they’re one formidable duo.

No no! There’s no need to be afraid! Apparently Ranboo’s arsonist days are over and he has his carer Charlie Slimecicle watching over him so he’s been relatively quiet recently. I like to think their neighbour Technoblade has been a good influence on them both.

Technoblade is a gentle soul. Poor kid just wants to make everyone happy, you know? I wish everyone was more like Technoblade sometimes – the world would be such a different place…

Nah, nobody can really sleep soundly – not when Antfrost and Purpled are still out there. The Eggpire and Las Nevadas never really rest when it comes to their members. Oh! But by far the worst person to come across – the real reason I haven’t slept in weeks on this server – is… Oh. Oh dear. I think I’ve summoned him. Walk this way – quickly! – and don’t make eye contact…

NO JACK I HAVE NO DESIRE TO WITNESS THE JACK MANIFOLD “GRIND” NOW PLEASE TAKE YOUR FILTH AND YOUR CAT-MAID OUTFIT AND GO BOTHER SAPNAP OR SKEPPY INSTEAD!

…Alright, no need to look at Jack like that.

Jack Manifold in a cat-maid- no. Don’t make me lock you up in Pandora’s Vault along with- uhhhhhh.

Forget I said that. Speaking of Skeppy, he built Schlatt and Techno a beautiful mansion around here somewhere-!

He also built an extraordinary diamond sculpture a while ago-

Please no.

…I guess you leave me no choice then, huh? I guess, I can show you the prison – but we have to be really, really careful, okay?

Who’s inside? Well…

I didn’t forget! It just… Tommy. Tommy is in the prison right now.

Well, of course I didn’t want to tell you! It doesn’t really look good on the server when the person its named after is locked up for life for doing unspeakable things.

No! I’m not gonna tell you what unspeakable things he did – it wouldn’t make them unspeakable then, would it?

…I don’t believe anyone else is in there, no. Why?

Ranboo? Nahhhhhh! Ha ha! What do you know, you silly goose! Well, before we go into the prison, we’ll have to get Puffy’s permission. She’s really strict about who she lets in and out of the prison and takes her role as prison warden very, very seriously. No one has ever died or been injured or brought back to life or wrongly imprisoned while the prison has been in her care.

What do you mean – “not convincing”? If you don’t trust my word, then that’s a /you/ problem.

…The prison is this way. Now, when we get in let me do all the talking… You know what? Perhaps you should stay outside. I’ll go in, talk to Puffy and try to get permission to go in – but I make no promises, understand?

…Alright, wait here.

…

Puffy said no.

No, it was a pretty definitive no actually. Wh-where are you going?

You can’t! Puffy hasn’t given you permission!

There’s nobody in there /to/ save. Tommy deserves to be in there-

There is nobody else in the prison!

You’re insane.

No, I won’t let you.

…

…I don’t think so, matey. Feel that sharp object between your shoulder blades?

I figured you did. That’s my sword. I am not afraid to push it through your chest if it means keeping you out of that prison. Understood? Now, step away from the prison.

Thank you.

…I think that concludes our tour. Perhaps it’s best you- oh! Karl is here! Karl Jacobs! Over here!

Yeah. He doesn’t talk ever but he’s still a great guy, you know?

Oi. Wave back. It would be rude not to wave back.

My name? Oh my goodness! I totally forgot to introduce myself! (Though, you never really asked until now anyways…)

It’s okay! I know I talk a lot – it can be difficult to get me to shut up sometimes – ha ha!

My name is Callahan.

#tommy smp #dream smp #tommyinnit #dream #callahan #tour #dumb #this was dumb #but still a lot fun #my name is callahan

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alleyesonthehindenburg · 4 years ago

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I found out a few days ago that Tales of Vesperia is available on the Switch and I’ve been playing nonstop. I loved it as a kid, and it’s just as good as I remember! I have a couple a.b.o headcanons (following the ‘verse rules I outlined here) that I wanted to share.

Yuri, Estelle and Raven are omegas. Karol and Rita are betas. Judy, Patty and Flynn are alphas. Repede is a dog.

When Yuri and Flynn met at a grand six years old, Flynn proclaimed that he would protect them because he’s an alpha and that’s what alphas do. Yuri beat him up. It was the start of a beautiful friendship.

Flynn is one of the more vocal proponents of recruiting more omegas to the knights.

The castle library in Zaphias has a generous selection of romance novels, and Estelle grew up reading about the incomparable bond between alpha and omega pairs. Every morning Estelle wakes up across from Rita, her beta mate, and thinks that no book she ever read could come close to this.

Karol feels insecure at times about being a beta guild leader, since all of his favourite heroes of guild history were alphas. Raven is the one who points out to him that just as many betas and omegas have contributed to the legacy of the guilds. It’s part of Brave Vesperia’s principles to never judge members for their dynamic, and that means Karol needs to embrace that philosophy fully.

Rita genuinely could not care less about anyone’s expectations. Blastia don’t care about dynamic, so neither does she. Travelling with Brave Vesperia opens her eyes to the way that dynamic stereotypes affect how her friends move through the world.

After having his entire identity defined first by Alexei and then the Don (both alphas) Raven is a bit wary around alphas he doesn’t know. it takes him some time to get comfortable with Judy and even Patty, and longer still for him to fully relax around Flynn. You’d never know it, though - Raven’s very good at hiding his reservations with jokes and bravado.

Patty is a young alpha, and... you know when a young boy decides he has a crush on you and he’s kinda casually sexist about it just because that’s how he’s been raised, and you roll your eyes and ignore it while also nudging him away from those chauvinistic ideas? That’s Patty and Yuri.

At one point Patty jokingly (...mostly) challenges Flynn to a duel for Yuri’s hand. Flynn just looks over at Yuri and says “Apparently I’m fighting for your hand,” to which Yuri responds “Go nuts, I’m gonna bite it off.”

Yuri and Judy sometimes play the protective alpha/cosseted omega duo for the sole purpose of riling Flynn up. Flynn is well aware that if he tried to be like that with Yuri - or if Judy tried it for real - Yuri would kick both their asses. It still grinds his gears.

The empire tends to be more traditional in its approach to dynamic roles; this is slowly changing, but there still aren’t many omegas in the knights. The Union is less rigid, although it does vary from one guild to the next. President Kaufman is the first omega leader of one of the Five Master Guilds.

#tales of vesperia #ristelle #fluri #omegaverse #alpha beta omega #i love this game so much it's so good

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wyrdify · 4 years ago

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Post-Promised Day Roy is still a mess of a human being, and, what it looks like depends on the verse, how he gets his eyesight back, and what he’s doing.

AND OOPS THIS GOT LONG, SO UNDER A READMORE IT GOES.

Like, Roy is the king of putting on a brave face to hide how absolutely fucking terrified he is. When he lost his eyesight, it was probably the most frightened he’s ever been in his life. In Brotherhood, you can hear it in his voice. In the manga, what does he do as soon as he realizes that his eyes aren’t adjusting to his surroundings, and he can’t see? He’s on the ground. He’s not moving. He’s gritting his teeth.

And he makes no attempt to use his alchemy. Not until he has Riza at his side. This is for a good reason, though, since flame alchemy requires precision when there are other parties present. Then, there’s the fact that Father disabled Amestrian alchemy.

I still wonder if Roy could’ve used his, though. That’s a theory for another time.

But again, even though he’s just lost his sight, and had a sword go through each hand, he’s still doing what he can to help. He’s helping Ed and Al come to the same conclusion that he did: that Pride sacrificed something by forcing him through the Gate. He’s telling the others how many people live in Amestris so they have an idea of how powerful Father’s Philosopher’s Stone is.

And he still deems himself useless, the thing he hates being the most. It’s why that moment between him and Riza is so dang powerful. She knows this about him. Not only that, but she is the only one outside of Roy himself who even has an idea of how flame alchemy works. He trusts her with his life.

I’ll never be over that, okay.

When the battle ends, Roy is by himself. He’s out of the way. As soon as Dr. Knox starts talking to him, though, he puts on that face. He’s grinning because of the irony that he lost his sight. When Dr. Knox tells him that he’ll be discharged because of his lack of eyesight, he’s still determined to do what he can. We don’t know if he had a plan prepared since Marcoh showed up right then, but, honestly? I don’t think he did.

He makes it look like he’s okay with giving Grumman the presidency, but, internally, I doubt he is. This is what he dedicated his life to since the end of the Ishval war. In such a short amount of time, he’s forced to give up that dream. He has to find another way. Obviously, he’s still determined to move forward, still do what he can to help others, still improve Amestris. He’s one stubborn fucker who ignores his own pain for the sake of others. In this case, he’s putting his emotional pain aside. He’s scared, probably devastated, angry, and so many other things.

I’m not a big fan of Marcoh just giving him the Philosopher’s Stone. It’s the one plot point in the story that I disagree with. Roy, with how principled he made himself, wouldn’t want to use it for himself at all. He wouldn’t want the sacrifice of others, especially Ishvalans who no longer have any agency or autonomy, be used for himself. That’s one reason why Chrissy restoring his eyesight, along with Havoc’s spine, is so incredibly important and valuable to me. That verse is just... I have so many feelings.

For Post-Promised Day Roy, I want to explore more possibilities, aka him either finding a way to restore his sight without the stone, or learning to live with being blind. I’d have to do more research into eye surgery and its history to see if that would be possible. Amestris’s medical development is a bit hard to pin down in this regard.

So, say if a certain roach lived through the Promised Day. Roy wouldn’t even try to stop him from taking that magic cough drop. He doesn’t want it for himself. Besides, he doesn’t feel like he could safely use his alchemy at all, much less on Kimblee. Which... I’d have to wonder how Kimblee would react to hearing Roy say, “I can’t use my alchemy anymore.” Or, the worse one: “I’m useless.”

I also wonder if he’d actually admit that last one to Kimblee. He’s shown weakness around Kimblee before, but this is a different level.

Sure, he could keep relying on Riza to direct him, but he wouldn’t want to do that for her. It’s limiting what she can do, and, once she’s fully healed, she can do a lot.

I have no idea where I was going with this. Basically: gimme all those Post-Promised Day threads.

#thewriter; meta #thewriter; wishlist #[ spawning from the earlier dash convos fdsalf ]

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cinnnamontoastcrunch · 5 years ago

Audio

It has been a long 7 years since The Strokes released their album Comedown Machine. Truthfully, I had no idea that they would be releasing another album. With all the criticism the band faced in terms of producing lower quality music, stealing shine from less privileged artists, and the age-old question of whether they could ever live up to Is This It, I was definitely a bit worried for The Strokes. Worried of whether they would stay together and worried if they would ever release another quality record. After listening to The New Abnormal pretty much everyday throughout quarantine, I can say that one thing is certain: The Strokes are back.

The New Abnormal is a beautiful “comeback” album for the band and really showcases a more boundary-pushing, experimental approach to the typical Strokes sounds. From the distorted vocals, guitars, and long-winded tracks, The New Abnormal definitely shows some risk-taking on the band’s part. My favorite track is The Adults Are Talking for its political overtones and disjointed song structure, including numerous small guitar solos that break up the verses in a truly unique way.

The way Julian Casablancas has written this song is simply brilliant, in that the interpretation of the lyrics can be taken in many different ways. However, perhaps the most relevant for this track is a political explanation for the meaning of the track. The title of the track is a nod to a common idiom used in America, where adults classically tell younger kids “the adults are talking.” This is a veiled way of saying to a child “shut up, you are irrelevant right now.” The Strokes cleverly liken the “adults” in this idiom to the politicians of the U.S. and the children to the citizens, who are unable to have a say or even sometimes understand what the “adults” are talking about. What an absolutely amazing comparison!! The first verse provides some pretty great insight into the band’s perspective on this concept:

They've been sayin' you're sophisticated They're complainin', overeducated You are saying all the words I'm dreaming Say it after me Say it after me They will blame us, crucify and shame us We can't help it if we are a problem We are tryin' hard to get your attention I'm climbin' up your wall Climbin' up your wall

Right out of the gate, it sounds to me as if The Strokes are showing a discrete support for Bernie Sanders. In past interviews, Julian has voiced his support for Bernie, so it wouldn’t surprise me if this is what he was writing about here. In particular the lyrics “You are saying all the words I’m dreaming” are interesting. It’s almost as if Julian is hearing Bernie’s ideals and agenda as the answer to solving all of the problems in America. He continues with “we are tryin’ hard to get your attention,” saying he is trying to get the politicians to listen. But, again, he is merely a kid - like every other citizen - who is voiceless against the political power of the “adults.” And finally, to top it all off, he ends the verse with “I’m climbin’ up your wall.” He’s gotta be talking about taking down the Trump presidency and the wall he promised to build at the border. In short, Julian wants rebellion and reform, and he beautifully connects these issues to the broader meaning of the song. The chorus reflects the corruption of politics as a whole:

Don't go there 'cause you'll never return I know you think of me when you think of her But then it don't make sense when you're trying hard To do the right thing, but without recompense And then you did something wrong and you said it was great And now you don't know how you could ever complain Because you're all confused 'cause you want me to But then you want me to do it the same as you

To me, it sounds like Julian is detailing the issues a young politician faces. They enter politics with a moral and just purpose -- to right society’s wrongs. However, they quickly realize that this isn’t truly possible, and “doing the right thing” is harder than it seems, especially without getting any money. So, the politician, after being introduced to this new world of corruption that turns a blind eye to the well-being of the citizens (the children), chooses to join in. This leaves them confused, and they hope they can eventually break the cycle of corruption. Julian echoes these thoughts by repeating the line “I’ll get it right sometime / Oh, maybe not tonight.” The politician internally wants to do right, just not right now. Perhaps they are addicted to the money that comes with corruption, as their greed is fighting with their morals. Such brilliant songwriting from the band that tells such an important story that has become increasingly relevant since the COVID response from the government. I really love this song for the instrumentation and the way they’re able to tie together such an interesting and abstract concept into such descriptive lyrics. Absolute genius.

The band explores similar politically relevant ideas throughout the album, such as climate change on Eternal Summer. All of these themes give more context as to why the project was called The New Abnormal. Where we are headed politically in the U.S. is quite unlike anything we’ve ever really seen in recent history. Especially with regards to the current presidency. The Strokes are acknowledging this “uncharted territory” by referring to it as a “new abnormal.” Overall, I love this project and I truly did not expect to be as artistic and relevant as it was. Each song tells its own story and the whole album is done in classic Strokes fashion with twists in production and vocals. Definitely looking forward to the next project we get from them, if/when that happens.

#thestrokes #the strokes #the new abnormal #julian casablancas #the voidz #the adults are talking #is this it #comedown machine

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mysweetestcreature · 5 years ago

Text

Tomorrow Never Knows (President!Harry) Chapter 1: Had Me from Hello

(Banner by the wonderful noblewomankat <3)

***

Masterlist

***

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

The car parks right at the entrance of the school, where some students are gathered around making conversation and trying to out-do the other in who’s had the most exotic vacation, while others swarm through the doors on a mission to get back into the flow of the semester. Harry eyes the building up and down from the window cautiously. Don’t get him wrong, he’s ecstatic to be attending Ashwood Prep this year, especially considering the fact he received a hefty amount of scholarship money when he had gotten accepted. It’s just that being the new kid at a K12 school might as well be like getting thrown into open water when all one knows is how to backstroke.

“I could drive around the block again, if you’d like?” Harry snorts at the suggestion as he turns back to his mum. “I can just feel anxiety coming off your aura,” she adds, circling her hand just around the side of his head. Over the last few months, she’s been very interested in trying to read his aura, whatever that means (he isn’t sure how this obsession started, but he’ll admit that she’s getting quite good).

“Mum...” he whines, shrinking further into the leather of his seat as he covers his face from any overly curious eyes that may find him and his mother a little too interesting.

Anne feigns offense and lets out a dramatic huff. “Not even a day in high school, and he’s already ashamed to be seen with me.”

Both remain silent for the time being, and only the chatter from outside fills the void of unsaid between them. It’s when Harry takes the chance and subtly tries to take a peek at her from the corner of his eye, does he find her doing the exact same. They burst into giggles, and Harry shakes his head as he sits up. Once he’s recovered, his gaze falls back towards the window, where the number of students has decreased in just a matter of minutes.

“’m nervous,” he admits despondently a few seconds later.

A hand falls over his, squeezing it tight as its thumb pads over his skin to calm him. “And that’s completely normal, but, darling –– it’s going to be alright. I know this because I know you, and you’re never one to back down. Besides, I think you look quite handsome in your uniform.” He’s dressed in black dress pants topped off with a white polo, a cool-toned dark blue cardigan and a black tie with school’s emblem printed in the middle.

As Harry lets the rest of Anne’s words sink in, he thinks about how he’d been in this position not even two years ago. A year and eight months ago, to be exact, he’d moved from his childhood home in Holmes Chapel in England to New Jersey. Anne had received a stellar job opportunity as marketing head at a consumer goods company, and Harry and his sister, Gemma, felt like that had to support her in this new chapter of her life. Unfortunately, that included leaving behind their friends, family, and all that they’ve ever known. So, in mid-January, he’d been the new kid to insert himself into the seventh-grade at JW Middle School. For the most part, everyone in his year had been kind enough, sans those few jerks who made fun of the way he talked and yelled ‘bloody hell’ whenever they’d see him in the halls or at lunch, but even that only lasted for a month. Other than that, he felt as though he’d really tried to make the best out of their situation.

Now here he is again, in nearly an identical position as the last. It’s a lot better now, he supposes. For starters, he’s starting school on the first day, so he’s sure there are going to be at least a dozen new students like him. By now, he’s also used to living in Jersey (loves it, his mum would say), even knows all the best diners within a thirty-mile radius of his house and where to get the freshest bagels on a Saturday morning.

The eighth grade had even been immensely enjoyable for him, he had made a lot of friends, had his first kiss, and he even graduated salutatorian of the class, only falling a thousandth of a decimal behind Andrea Chung.

“You know what? You’re right, mum. I can so do this,” he affirms himself.

“Hey, I didn’t say to be cocky,” Anne teases, pinching his cheeks before she unlocks the doors. “Now, get out of my car. I have a meeting in less than an hour, and I still need to stop for coffee. Love you!”

Harry lets his feet fall onto the sidewalk toes first, and pulls the straps of his backpack over his shoulders. Ashwood Prep looks even bigger now that he’s stood on the ground. Everyone is dressed in their uniforms, but of course there are those who obviously chose to customize theirs. He looks to his left, and swallows hard as Anne’s Mercedes merges onto the main road. “This is it,” he tells himself. This is where he’ll be spending the next four years of his life.

Suddenly, he feels something knock into his back, causing him to stumble a few steps forward.

“Oof!”

Before he can catch a glimpse and ask if whoever it was is okay, a figure manages to dodge his eyes as she speeds off up the stairs.

“I’m so sorry!” the girl yells back at him, but all he can really make out is the side of her face and a silver and pink checkered scrunchie that holds her hair back in a half do style. “But I have to get these ready before Pattern A or else Mr. N is totally gonna be on my back about it!” Her echo sounds panicked as she disappears into the building, and even the students still remaining towards the entrance part a path for her to pass.

“You’re fine!” he shouts after her.

***

“You’ll find that your locker assignments and schedules are laid out for you in alphabetical order,” the homeroom teacher, Mr. Bartolome says in his most unenthusiastic tone. “If you have any questions...ask each other.” Harry heads towards the back in search of his last name, until he finds it at a desk right by the window, its position is in perfect view of the entire room. There are some small things he notices, like how the walls have barely a scratch on them and how the floors are so we'll polished that even the slightest of movements elicits a squeak.

Just as he takes his seat, a voice booms from beside him. “Excuse me!” His head leads the rest of his body as he pivots on his heel. A girl with magnificent auburn hair tied back in a high ponytail and freckles that dance across her face almost perfectly stares inquisitively at him. “You’re new, right? I’m Zoey”

“Oh, uh...yeah. I’m Harry,” he replies with a polite nod. As he sits down, he can feel Zoey’s eyes scan him up and down.

“Wait!” she gasps, her mouth falling open. “Are you...are you from England?” She looks at him expectantly, as though waiting for him to say that he’s related to the Queen or Churchill or something just as outrageous as that.

He nods before speaking. “Cheshire,” he replies, but she stares at him blankly. “It’s North from London.”

“Oh,” she tries to hide her disappointment. “Well, if you need help with anything, you can always ask me.”

“Thanks,” he offers her a tight-lipped grin. She sends him a wink in return before turning to her friend seated to her other side.

Harry takes the opportunity to look down at the gridded schedule laid out before him. Thank god he’d looked over his schedule ahead a time when it was posted online because it had taken him about an hour to fully comprehend, and if he’s being honest, Mr. Bartolome kind of scares him. The school works on a 6-day cycle, and each class is referred to as a ‘pattern’ rather than a ‘period’. Each day, one subject drops, and the one that had dropped the day before is added in at the beginning. He looks up at the board, where Mr. Bartolome has written an outline of how today is going to work out. Day 1, it says in green marker, followed by the order of classes. Harry looks back down at his schedule, and his eyes linger on his Pattern A.

***

His first class of the day just happens to be his favorite subject. Harry isn’t sure what it is, but he loves reading and learning about the past and drawing maps of how the past has contributed and affected the present. It might be because his grandad had been a university history professor at Oxford and would tell Harry tales from World War 2 in place of the usual bedtime stores (that’s not to say that Harry isn’t well versed in fairytales, of course).

Luckily there hadn’t been assigned seating, so Harry was able to snag a table in the third row when he had first come in. The seats are now slowly filling up as the rest of the class staggers in a few tired looking students at a time, and the teacher makes it a point to note that it’s the first day...the first class of the day nonetheless! Harry recognizes a few from homeroom, like the boy who had dared asked Mr. Bartolome a question, and Zoey, who flirtatiously waves at him with before being forced into the back by a few of her friends.

Their teacher pushes out of his chair and heads to the whiteboard. He takes a dry erase marker in his hand, and in big letters writes what looks to be his name, but Harry can barely make it out without squinting his eyes.

“Welcome to US History Honors!” he exclaims. “As I’ve just written in my embarrisingly horrendous handwriting...which is why we’re definitely using PowerPoint, so I don’t get a billion emails about what’s written, don’t worry...I’m Mr. Noone!”

Mr. Noone walks over to the door, but just as he’s about to shut it to start the lesson, someone calls out to him from the hall. “Wait! I’m here, I’m here!” Everyone watches as the elderly man lets out a knowing sigh, shoulders falling in defeat, but it’s followed by a genuine chuckle as the final student speeds into the room.

“Sorry, Mr. N!” she says, still trying to catch her breath. Harry immediately eyes the same pink and grey scrunchie that had knocked into him earlier. “But I had to wait for these to cool before packing them up or else all the sugar would fall off!” In her hands is a medium-sized Tupperware, and he recognizes the faint yet alluring scent of freshly baked treats.

“Earl grey short bread?” Mr. Noone cocks a brow at her as he finally shuts the door. “I don’t accept tardiness for just any average cookie.”

The girl shakes her head animatedly. “I’m insulted that you even have to ask that question!” Mr. Noone strolls towards his desk with his hands behind his back, then peaks over the top of the container. A pleased expression dances across his face as his fingers fish for a scrumptious cookie to bite in to, and he’s even more ecstatic as the shortbread touches his palate.

“You did good, kid. Now find a seat before I write you up for loitering,” he threatens lightly, and the girl lets out a little huff as she turns around.

And that’s when Harry finally sees her face.

His stomach flips over, and he’s left in that awkward position of will he or won’t he see this morning’s breakfast again (and he’d eaten a hefty meal). Her eyes have a glimmer to them, like a star on top of a Christmas tree or better yet, the real ones he watches from his bedroom window when he can’t fall asleep. He’s so in awe that he stops breathing when those sparkling eyes land on the empty seat right beside him. Whatever amusement he’d been feeling when he’d first sat down is now replaced with something else. It’s like heat that creeps up to his neck originating from the base of his spine.

The closer she gets, the sweatier his palms become, so bad that he has trouble keeping his pen firm in his grasp. “Hi, I’m Y/n!” she says as she stops in front of him, a warm smile embedded on her lips and a warmth that seems to radiate off her so naturally. “I hope you don’t mind if I sit here?”

“Y-yeah, I mean, no! I mean, of course. It’s...it’s all yours.” What was that?! Jesus Christ, Harry. It’s like you’ve never talked to a girl before! She giggles as he trips over his words, but thanks him graciously before sliding into the seat and getting herself comfortable. He tenses at her presence being so close to him and he couldn’t tell you why. “Harry,” he blurts out like vomit.

“What?” She looks up from digging through her bag.

He bites on the inside of his cheek, suddenly feeling conscious under this self-imposed pressure. “My name’s Harry,” and he shyly repeats before turning back to the board.

Y/n tilts her head at him, and the soft smile returns to her face. “Nice to meet you, Harry.”

At that, he’s finally able to breathe normally. He steals a couple glances at her as she sets everything down on their table, and he notices how her lips quirk to the side as she sets everything down with such precision. A printed Beatles-themed pencil case catches his eye, and he smiles to himself as he thinks fondly to all the times his grandad had played their records over and over.

“I love the Beatles,” he says almost as a whisper, but she picks up on it and perks up immediately.

“They’re my favorite band and all I listen to most days.” She picks up the pouch and twirls it in her hands. “My dad brought this back when he visited London a few years ago. I’ve never been, but hopefully one day!” There’s hope in her voice as she stares sheepishly at the print.

“Alright!” Their conversation is cut short as Mr. Noone chews up his last bit of cookie. “Now that that’s taken care of, let’s start class!” A projection screen starts to pull down over the whiteboard, followed by a slowly brightening white light. “While we’re waiting for this to load, I want you to take a good look at who you’re sitting next to because you’ll be partnering up for various projects and presentations over the course of the year.”

***

After class, Harry sits back as he watches a bulk of his classmates file out of the room en route to their next destination. As their voices carry out into the halls, it’s just him and a few others left, including Y/n, who appears to be taking her sweet time packing everything up in her bag.

“So,” the “o” carries out longer than he’d anticipated. He scratches the back of his neck as he searches for something, anything, he can say to her, so she doesn’t think he’s a complete and utter fool for not being able to speak without fumbling over his own tongue. “I’m not really sure where my next class is.”

“Oh!” Her eyes grow wide as she zips up her backpack. “I could help you, if you’d like?” And gosh, does his chest pound when she leans in close and takes a peek at his schedule in front of him on the table. “You’re actually just on the second floor!” she exclaims, pointing up towards the ceiling. “I’m like ninety-seven percent sure it’s the third door on the right if you take the stairs right outside this room.”

Harry takes a quick mental note of her instructions before pushing out of his chair. “Thank you,” he starts, and both of them head towards the door, with her leading the way.

Just as she takes one step outside, she suddenly turns around, and Harry nearly crashes into her. “I’ll be back for my Tupperware, Mr. N! There’s no way I’m letting you swipe another one from under my nose!” The old man waves her off and mutters something under his breath that Harry thinks might have been a “whatever you say”. Y/n looks up at him, and signals for them to continue into the hall.

“He’s a real sweetheart,” she says as they climb up the stairs.

“Who?”

“Mr. Noone,” she explains. “I think you’ll really like him! His classes are pretty chill for the most part and he’s super understanding, too. Like last year I had the flu for about a week and a half since my brother had gotten me sick because his whole kindergarten class had come down with for some strange reason, and Mr. N was the only teacher who didn’t have me make up any work.”

“Yeah?” he smiles at her.

She promptly shakes her head in confirmation. “Yeah! He just gave me this mini test with all the material I’d missed, and he even gave me a study guide to study off to help me with it!” Her face falls into a small frown when they stop in front Harry’s next class. “Oh, well I guess this is you.” She digs her foot into the marbled floor as she peeks into the room. “It was nice talking to you, Harry! I’ll see you around!” she says with a more upbeat tone.

“Bye, and thanks again for helping me get to class. It probably cut down the anxiety time by at least two minutes,” he confesses, a slight blush spreading around the area of his nose. She smiles before heading her own way, and he doesn’t know why he feels this sudden decline in his mood as she grows further and further. He just stands there, watching her walk down the corridor while the rest of the students laze into the classroom. Just as he’s about to head in, he chances one last look in her direction, and it’s just in time see her looking over her shoulder.

***

Harry’s managed to make himself a new friend in Debate class. His name is Max, and he’d been a transfer student from JW the year before Harry had started attending. They bonded over that, as well as a mutual love for movies made during the Classical Hollywood period (they’ve even made plans to watch a Hitchcock film this weekend), and even how they live in the same neighborhood –– a few streets apart, to be more specific!

“I think it’s cool that you have an accent,” Max says to him as they stop at Harry’s locker before heading to lunch. Harry empties out his books from his first three classes. It’s no wonder his back had been aching, he’d forgotten to take out his US Politics textbook, and he doesn’t even have that class today. He’d had a free (also with Max) before this, and he’d managed to finish up all the readings and homework for history and biology that are all due tomorrow. He likes to be efficient with his time, especially when the teachers start putting on a heftier workload. “Did you see how all those girls freaked when you introduced yourself? I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything like it!”

“Everyone has an accent, mate. It’s just mine sounds a lot different from yours.” Everyone in Debate had freaked over the way he spoke, and as Max had pointed out, it had garnered a lot of attention from some of the girls in class.

“No need to get all technical with me. You have a gift, my friend. Use it wisely.” Harry shuts his locker, and the two continue towards the cafeteria. This morning, Anne had packed him his favorite roast beef and swiss on rye, a tradition on the first day of school that they’ve kept since he was small. Although, Max had been going on about how amazing the food here was, which is hard to believe that any school lunch can be anything but subpar, so he may have to test that out, as well. On the way there, they turn into a hallway, and are immediately hit with a sweet-smelling aroma of cinnamon and brown sugar.

Harry stops just outside the door, humming happily to himself as he pictures whatever magic is happening on the other side. “Kitchen?” He points in its direction with his thumb.

“Home economics room,” his friend smirks. “A friend spends a hell of a lot of time in there. She’s a really good baker, I can’t even count how many of her lemon bars I’ve had since I started going here.”

***

Y/n is late for lunch, but it’s really not her fault! She got caught up in decorating a cake with fondant roses and fancy piping that she been working on all period long because she wanted to impress Miss Genevra with a new technique that she had learned at a baking seminar she’d taken over the summer. And it turned out nearly perfect (there was one flower that looked a tad lopsided, but only Y/n fussed over it), and the flavor was just as impressive.

All that aside, she now only has about ten minutes left to buy lunch and scarf it all down before her Pattern J starts, and she still has to stop by her locker to get her art kit and sketchbook, not to mention she has to make time to hound Mr. N for her Tupperware back, or else her dad will throw another fit.

So, she quickly grabs a Snapple and a basket of chicken tenders from the hot rack, then brings it all to the cashier. A woman, about forty years old sits on her stool, and smiles at Y/n as she approaches. “Hi, Layla!” Y/n greets her, handing her over a crisp ten-dollar bill. “How was your trip to Ecuador? I’m sure Benny and Sammy loved it!” Benny and Sammy are Layla’s twin boys that Y/n babysits from time to time when Layla and her partner go out for a date night. They’re about her brother’s age, so Mason is always so happy when she brings him along to their house for an impromptu playdate.

Layla smiles, handing back her change of four dollars and fifty cents. “They did! Thanks for asking, sweetheart.” She stares down at her watch, then gives the young girl a knowing look. “Now you better finish that up before your next class. I think I saw Maxxie sitting somewhere in the back.”

“Oh, thanks for the heads up! And by the way...” Y/n looks into her bag and pulls out a stack of fudge bars neatly wrapped in tin foil. “The boys’ favorite! Made fresh today.”

“Ah! You’re just an angel, aren’t you?” Layla gushes before sending her on her way.

Y/n searches for Maxxie’s mop of dirty blonde hair as she maneuvers around all the busy tables. They’d met a few years ago, and she considers him to be one of her best friends. He’d texted her earlier saying he’d be bringing a friend to sit with them at lunch, and that he was totally cute and had a smile that would surely make her weak at the knees. Think Zach Anderson, but 100x better, his message had read. She smiles widely when she sees him.

“So, last night I saw this movie made in like the 40s and I totally got this ince-” She cover his eyes with her hands and does her best to bite back the erupting giggles.

“Guess who?”

“Well, you smell strongly of vanilla and...” He takes a long whiff through his nose. “...and...is that orange zest?”

“Lemon, but close enough, I guess.” Y/n takes the empty seat on his right. Maxxie leans in for a hug, and only then does she notice the familiar company.

“Hey, you! I was beginning to think you’d drowned in a tub of frosting or something,” he jokes, picking something out of her hair before settling back. He turns to his left. “This is-”

“Harry,” she says it like it’s a dream. Gosh! When she’d met him earlier, she did everything she could to stay with it, when all she really wanted to do was scream into a pillow about how unrealistically green his eyes are. Instead, she thinks she might have overshared some details with a complete stranger because regardless of how cute she thinks he is –– and that’s very much –– she doesn’t know one thing about him besides his name.

“Y/n, hi,” Harry replies just as whimsically. They hold eye contact for a while, but as Y/n feels the heat begin to rise from her neck to her cheeks, she soon turns away and begins to pick at her chicken, while Harry bites his lips inward and looks down into his lap to check his phone.

The boy in between them looks back and forth between the two. His eyebrows rise to his forehead and his mouth parts slightly in confusion.

“So... I’m guessing you’ve met?”

***

#president!harry #harry styles #harry styles imagine #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles smut #harry styles drabble #harry styles fluff #harry styles au

294 notes · View notes

skyfirewolf · 5 years ago

Text

Edward Stevens: facts

After the suicide of his uncle and guardian Peter Lytton, James Hamilton went off to train with an elderly carpenter and his younger brother, Alexander Hamilton, was whisked off to the King Street home of Thomas Stevens, a well-respected merchant and his wife, Ann. Of the five children born to the married couple, Edward born a year before Alexander became his closest friend, "an intimate acquaintance begun in early youth," as Hamilton described their relationship. As they both matured, the often seemed to display parallel personalities: both were quick and clever, disciplined and persevering, fluent in French, versed in classical history, held the same morals and were interested in medicine. In later years, Edward reminded Alexander of "those vows of eternal friendship, which we have so often mutually exchanged," he often fretted about his friend's delicate health.

Their physical appearance was close. Thirty years later, when Timothy Pickering, then secretary of state, first set eyes on Edward Stevens, he was torn by their resemblance. "At first glance, I was struck with the extraordinary similitude of his and General Hamilton's faces–I thought they must be brothers." Pickering confided with shock to Edward's brother-in-law, James Yard of St. Croix only to be told that this remark was said many times before. Pickering even concluded to himself that they were in fact brothers and Hamilton was an illegitimate child of "Stevens".

Edward Stevens also went to Kings College and years before Hamilton. November 11th, 1769 is Hamilton's oldest letter surviving in his pen–the recipient was Stevens. Arriving in New York 1773, the only person he knew was Stevens. In his first months at King's, he and a friend, Robert Troup, formed a club that gathered weekly to hone debating, writing and speaking skills. Stevens was one of the members.

While married to Elizabeth Schuyler, Edward Stevens became "the guardian angel" of the household and he appeared at providential moments and tended to Eliza reassuring her she was in no danger at times of illness. During the yellow fever epidemic in 1793, Edward Seven turned up Philadelphia and attended to both Alexander and Eliza when they both contracted the disease. He treated with bark, wine, and cold baths, a regimen that stirred some controversy since Stevens scorned the bloodletting treatment advocated by most doctors including Rush. Upon his recovery, Hamilton became an advocate for Stevens's method.

(Text above is credited to sonofhistory)

- He cured Eliza and Alexander of the fever within five days

- Stevens graduated from King's College in 1774 and then sailed to Britain to study Medicine at the University of Edinburgh

- He gained his doctorate (M.D.) on September 12, 1777

- Stevens' dissertation on gastric digestion was entitled "De alimentorum concoction"

- Based on this work, he was the first researcher to isolate human gastric juices

- His work confirmed that of René Antoine Ferchault de Réaumur, who showed the digestive power of gastric juices, and helped dispel earlier theories of digestion

- Stevens's work on digestion would influence Lazzaro Spallanzani

- On January 20, 1776, Stevens was admitted to the university's Royal Medical Society

- He served as the Society's president for the academic year 1779/1780. Stevens remained in Edinburgh until 1783 and was one of the joint founders of the Royal Society of Edinburgh in that year

- Stevens returned to St. Croix in 1783. He worked there as a physician for ten years

- He maintained his friendship with Hamilton through correspondence

- In adulthood, Hamilton tended to shun his turbulent adolescence, and Stevens was the only person from his childhood, including even his closest living family members, with whom he kept in regular contact

- Following the death of his wife, Eleanora, in 1792, Stevens decided to move to North America

- Stevens had considered a move to Guyana, but William Thornton urged him to choose the United States

- Also in 1792, Stevens married Hester Kortright Amory. Stevens ended his ten years of practicing medicine in the Caribbean and moved to Philadelphia in 1793

- (A/N" so he was widowed one year and married that same year, good job Ned)

- While in Philadelphia, he engaged in a controversy with Benjamin Rush on methods for treating an outbreak of yellow fever

- Stevens was admitted to the American Philosophical Society on April 18, 1794. Stevens's work in digestion may have influenced other researchers in Philadelphia, notably John Richardson Young

- In 1795, Stevens was appointed as a professor at King's College

- Stevens served as the United States consul-general in Saint-Domingue (later Haiti) from 1799 to 1800

- Stevens's title, "consul", suggested a diplomat attached to a country not a colony, reflecting the administrations view of the Haitian situation

- Following his arrival in Haiti in April 1799, Stevens succeeded in accomplishing several of his objectives, including: the suppression of privateers operating out of the colony, protections for American lives and property, and right of entry for American vessels

- Stevens pushed for similar privileges for the British, who, like the United States, were engaged in war with France

- Negotiations between Haiti and Britain were difficult given Haiti's fears of Britain's desire to take control of the colony, and Britain's fears of the Haitian slave revolt spreading to its own Caribbean colonies. In fact, Stevens had to serve as the British agent for a time since Haitian troops feared having a British official in the colony

- Little is known of Stevens's last years. For two and a half months in 1809-10, during the British occupation of the Danish West Indies, Stevens served as President of St. Croix. He corresponded with David Hosack, including a letter introducing his son in 1823

- He outlived Hamilton by thirty years

- He also referred to Hamilton as "My Dr. Ham"

- Meanwhile, Hamilton called Edward "Ned" and "Neddy" and often reffered to him as his "particular friend"

- "Throughout the remainder of 1803 Stevens attended the American Philosophical Society regularly. He is recorded as being present on October 7, October 21, November 4, November 18. In 1804 he attended on February 17 and February 24. A minute on August 17 of that year is confusing. Apparently he donated two volumes of books, but the precise readings of the Minutes is unclear. The description is "Steven's Wars. 2 Vols". Thereafter Stevens never attended again. It will be recalled that in 1804 Alexander Hamilton died in a duel with Burr, and possible then, or later Stevens retired to St Croix. David Hossack wrote to him in St. Croix in a letter dated September 20th, 1809, from New York, so by that year, certainly, Stevens had left the United States."

— Edward Stevens: Gastric physiologist, physician and American statesman

(Ned must have been significantly distressed by Hamilton's death and perhaps even moved back to St Croix because of this)

Some letters between Ned and Alexander:

"I have written you so repeatedly since my Arrival in Scotland, without having ever received an Answer... I am perfectly at a Loss I assure you, my Dr: Hamilton, to account for your Silence. I have written you frequently, and, as I know that you was at a Distance from New York, enclosed your Letters to some of our common Friends in that City, and requested them to transmit them to you. But I have not been able to collect the least Intelligence concerning you from any Quarter..."

—To Alexander Hamilton from Edward Stevens, 23 December 1777

"Who could have imagined my friend that a man of your greatness, of your delicacy of constitution, and of your tranquility, would have shone so much, and in a short space of time, in the Champ de Mars, that you did it? I assure you, my Colonel, that I have tormented myself a great deal about your health, which has always been very dear to me since the beginning of our acquaintance. I do not know how you can sustain the hardships and fatigues of a winter campaign in America. Surely your constitution would never have sustained such severity without the assistance of something very extraordinary."

— To Alexander Hamilton from Edward Stevens, 1778

"Dear Edward

This just serves to acknowledge receipt of yoursper Cap Lowndeswhich was delivered me Yesterday. The truth of Cap Lightbourn & Lowndes information is now verifyd by the Presence of your Father and Sister for whose safe arrival I Pray, and that they may convey that Satisfaction to your Soul that must naturally flow from the sight of Absent Friends in health, and shall for news this way refer you to them. As to what you say respecting your having soon the happiness of seeing us all, I wish, for an accomplishment of your hopes provided they are Concomitant with your welfare, otherwise not, tho doubt whether I shall be Present or not for to confess my weakness, Ned, my Ambition is prevalent that I contemn the grov'ling and condition of a Clerk or the like, to which my Fortune &c. condemns me and would willingly risk my life tho' not my Character to exalt my Station. Im confident, Ned that my Youth excludes me from any hopes of immediate Preferment nor do I desire it, but I mean to prepare the way for futurity. Im no Philosopher you see and may be jusly said to Build Castles in the Air. My Folly makes me ashamd and beg youll Conceal it, yet Neddy we have seen such Schemes successfull when the Projector is Constant I shall Conclude saying I wish there was a War.

. . .

PS I this moment receivd yoursby William Smith and am pleasd to see you Give such Close Application to Study."

- Alexander Hamilton to Edward Stevens, St Croix, November 11th, 1769

(Alex, hon, GET YOUR GRAMMAR TOGETHER MY BOY)

#Edward Stevens #Alexander Hamilton #Historical #Facts #Founding father facts #Historical facts #NEDDY #YEET #historical Hamilton facts #my stuff

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dailyaudiobible · 4 years ago

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11/17/2020 DAb Transcript

Ezekiel 35:1-36:38, James 1:1-18, Psalms 116:1-19, Proverbs 27:23-27

Today is the 17th day of November welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I’m Brian it is a joy to be here with you today around the Global Campfire taking the next step forward. And we’re still working our way through the book of Ezekiel in the Old Testament but when we get to the New Testament we’re moving into entirely new territory and we’ll talk about that because, I mean, we’re gonna be hearing from a totally different voice than we've heard from so far in the whole Bible. So, we'll talk about that when we get there. But first, Ezekiel chapters 35 and 36. And we’re reading from the New Living Translation this week.

Introduction to the book of James:

Okay. So, for the most part in the New Testament we’ve…we’ve read the Gospels, of course, and we read the Acts of the Apostles, of course, which was written by Luke or the same author that wrote the gospel of Luke. Luke and Acts are two volumes from the same author. But then we’ve spent most of the rest of our time reading the letters of the apostle Paul. Then of course we got to the letter to the Hebrew's and its author is debated…well it has been debated for centuries and so most people just would say unknown. The origin, the absolute de facto for sure author of the letter of Hebrews is unknown, as scholars’ debate about some of the…the letters of the apostle Paul. Nevertheless, not to get too far in the weeds we’re moving into new territory now, territory that we haven't been in before with a voice that we haven't heard before, although we know this person. We’re about to read the letter of James, and James is known to be the brother of Jesus. But like all of the rest of the Scriptures that have been poured over for thousands of years by everybody from laymen to scholars to theologians to clergy and teachers. Billions of people over thousands of years have poured over the passages, every passage that we find in what we now know of as the Bible. So, James, the letter of James, has fallen under the same kind of scrutiny and scholarship as we would expect, and that includes debates about which James we’re talking about here. Which James wrote the letter of James? Which makes it difficult than to date James because which James we’re talking about would matter. And although there isn’t like 100% consensus there's really not 100% consensus about a lot of things in the Bible. There is a scenario that's maybe…maybe the most likely and that would be that the letter of James's probably really was written by James, the half-brother of Jesus. And this James that we’re talking about, the half-brother of Jesus didn't believe in Jesus or His ministry or His claims during His earthly ministry. James emerges as a leader and even like a foundational pillar of the early church after the resurrection. And it was James, if we remember from the book of Acts…if we remember from Paul's letters, we have talked so many times about the Jew / Gentile distinctions and the problems and the controversies and the challenges that the early church faced. And one of the earliest challenge…challenges was, “if God is doing a new thing in the world and Gentiles are allowed to be a part of it, how do they get in? Like, what governs that? How does it work?” And the first counsel that we know of, the first major decision in the church era was the Jerusalem Council, which is referenced in the book of Acts. It was James, the leader of the mother church, the Jerusalem church, the half-brother of Jesus who presided over that counsel. And, so, the reason that…that James, the half-brother of Jesus, is the leading, by far, candidate for who wrote the letter of James is in many ways because it was preserved. You know, if just some James decides to write some letter and nobody knows who this James is, and he writes this letter and gives it to somebody, I guess theoretically it could be preserved, but probably not preserved and passed around other churches and held in high esteem or even low esteem, as we'll see in a second. Whoever wrote this letter had credibility. Same way with the letter to the Hebrews. Whoever wrote this people knew who they were. They were recognized, and it seemed as if they should save what was written down. So, you would think that James, the half-brother of Jesus the Christ fit the criteria necessary to maybe hold onto the letter and would maybe give it credibility and significance in a way that…that there are no other candidates that could fill. So, although there's debate, James was probably written by James, the half-brother of Jesus, the leader of the Jerusalem church. And this letter really gives us glimpses into the Hebrew side of the early church. Most of what we look at, most of what we examine is examined through Gentile eyes. And certainly, the apostle Paul spoke to Hebrew people and tied the story of Jesus to the Hebrew narrative that had always been going on. Certainly, he did that, but his primary mission was to bring the good news of the gospel to the Gentiles. And we know that after the Jerusalem Council not everybody was on board with those decisions. And, so, we get a look in this letter from James into the early Hebrew believer’s perspective of the faith. It's…it's addressed to the 12 tribes, the scattered 12 tribes, the diaspora, for those who have been dispersed. And, so, that tells us it's a pretty broad audience that this is sent to bring the gospel. But it may have been...it may have been more specific than just those who have been carried away in exile. Persecution, marginalization, these kinds of things had begun and the gospel had begun to spread because of that. So, if a person lost their job and they were marginalized in their neighborhood and nobody was being nice to them anymore because they believed in Jesus and they decided they'd had enough and God is leading them to another city and they pack up their things and move to another city than they take the gospel with them to that city, a place where it's more receptive and the gospel than spread throughout the empire, the Roman world of the time. And of course, the stoning of Stephen that we read about in the book of Acts would and could have been a large catalyst. So, if that scenario's true than James would possibly be writing to the early believers who had been in his pastoral care in Jerusalem but had now begun to spread out. And the believers who received this letter wherever they received this letter, they had fled in all different directions to find a place of peace where they could just live their lives. But they would've always felt connected to the place that they found their faith in the Jerusalem church. And that's the mother church. So, a letter from the Jerusalem church. But that would've been something that would been treasured and kept and preserved especially…especially if James wrote it, the half-brother of Jesus, the leader of the church. And what we’re about to see is a little bit of the nuance that is a very important one. In Paul's letters and in the letter to the Hebrews we’re exploring faith and we’re going all the way back to the beginning of the Hebrew story, all the way back to Abram and seeing that it was his faith. And remember in the book of Hebrews we read the hall of faith. So, all of these…example, after example, after example in the Scriptures showing that faith is the essential activator of everything in relation to God. James believes that very thing, but he makes a very important distinction that is basically yes indeed faith is the essential piece. We must absolutely live by faith; however, faith without works is dead. That distinction has not always been popular throughout the journey in the history of the Christian faith. Even the reformer Martin Luther would have preferred to omit James from the canon of Scripture because Martin Luther, among other things, held a conviction of solo fide, it’s faith alone…faith alone that saves you. James wouldn't argue with that, he would just say, “there's a way of evidencing that you have faith, and that is how you live your life, your works. You can say whatever you want to say but there are ways of speaking that are far more powerful than words. Anybody can say anything, but you live what you actually believe.” So, the reformer Martin Luther may have called a letter of James, a letter of straw, but James probably couldn't, wouldn't have cared less. Because we’re about to hear a new tone in the Scripture. James is very, very forthright, very direct, very…attempting to be very clear so that there are no misunderstandings. And, so, we really are entering into the portion of Scripture that is about probably to kick our butt. And our butts will be kicked throughout James and the letters of Peter. So let's just get ready for that and let’s just be grateful for it out in front because sometimes it's the things that challenge us or disrupt us or kick our butt that make us stand up and wrestle with it and move forward instead of staying stagnant. And, so, with that, let's begin. James chapter 1 verses 1 through 18.

Prayer:

Father, we thank You for Your word. We thank You for another day, another day of life and another day to be in community together in Your word. And we thank You for this new territory, this letter of James that is certain to challenge us. It challenges me every year. And, so, we welcome that. We often try to minimize disruption and challenge and anything that we might have to endure, anything that we might have to go through even though it's the very thing that will make us stronger. We try to avoid those things but we’re grateful that in the Scriptures You confront everything, You touch everything. You move into whatever is going on with us and force us to ask the right questions about where we’re headed and we’re grateful that James begins to unpack that this very day by telling us when our faith is tested our endurance has a chance to grow. And we should let that happen. We should let it grow because if our endurance is completely developed, we’ll be perfect and complete, needing nothing. We’re also told that if we need wisdom, which we do, we’re to ask You Father and You will give it to us generously You’re not gonna rebuke us for asking for wisdom. So, we’re asking for wisdom. Give us wisdom as we move into this new territory in the Bible and as we move into this new territory in the world. Come Holy Spirit we pray. In the name of Jesus, we ask. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is home base, it is…it is the website, it’s where you find out what's going on around here as I say most all the time. So, stay tuned and stay connected.

We are doing the Global Campfire initiative right now and that will come to an end tomorrow. And that is just the converging of a few things, like I shared last week. The Heart album, Heart a contemplative journey that we released in July really came at a time that it was needed. And, so, just a lot of really, really wonderful feedback about things that God did through that project and continues to do through that project. And then there was the reemergence or reawakening a new affection for an old technology, that being vinyl albums and just the love to…the love for having album artwork and stuff available kind of how they…how it used to be. And then there's the Daily Audio Bible app that we are pouring in sowing resource into continually with the objective that it continues to become the portal, it continues to become the way that no matter where we are, it’s just in our back pocket or in our purse. We have a way to be connected no matter what. And, so, we pressed up some vinyl of the Heart album and we’re just inviting anyone while the supplies last. And they’re about by gone. Anyone who can give $100 or more into this initiative, specifically earmarked to sow deeper into app development, then we want to send you the Heart album on vinyl. I want to say it's a collector’s edition because it's beautiful. It's something to treasure. I think I said it a few days ago and I hadn’t planned to say it but when I said it I was like, “that rings true.” It's one thing we can hold onto from 2020 and say this was a good thing. And there are many things in hindsight, we will see about 2020 that are a good thing, but a lot of…a lot of us are gonna acknowledge it was a difficult trip around the sun, to say the least. But this is a bright spot in that. So, here's how you get there. Go to dailyaudiobible.com or open up the Daily Audio Bible app. If you are at the website at the .com look for Initiatives. Click Initiatives and you'll find the Global Campfire initiative. If you're in the app push the little icon in the upper left-hand corner, it’s a drawer that will open up, press Initiatives and you'll find the Global Campfire initiative. And I thank you. I thank you profoundly for your partnership.

If you have a prayer request or encouragement you can use the very app that we’re talking about here. One of the things that we were able to incorporate in the last year because of the continued building is the Hotline button and that's the little red button of the top. And I talk about it all the time. You press that no matter where you are in the world and you can…you can share, you can reach out, you can pray, you can ask for prayer right there. So, that's what you do or if you prefer, you can dial 877-942-4253.

And that's it for today. I’m Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

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artificialqueens · 5 years ago

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oh, my sunlight, chapter two (branjie) - holtzmanns

(read on ao3) | (tumblr: plastiquetiaras) | word count: 5060

AN: Chapter two! I love this verse so, so much. Thank you for all the sweet words on the first chapter, I appreciate it endlessly. Thank you writ for betaing and being wonderful <3

“Stupid blazer, so much for being a maternity fit-”

“You good, baby?” Vanessa pops her head out from their en suite bathroom, half dressed in the pantsuit that she’s going to be wearing for the German Chancellor’s state visit.

Brooke huffs. “Can’t get these buttons to close. How am I supposed to look professional if I can’t even button my damn blazer over my belly?”

Vanessa walks over, a soft grin taking over her face before she leans down to kiss Brooke’s stomach, grabbing both sides of her blazer. She fiddles with it, tongue poking out and lets out a whoop when she gets the blazer closed. “I don’t know why you’re so insistent on keeping up the pantsuits. There’s gotta be other clothes that are more-”

“Nope. Still gotta match the rest of the agents.” Brooke doesn’t even see it as an option. She can still keep up with everyone, she’s still the agent in command and she’s not going to be sitting back unless she fully has to.

“You’re seven and a half months pregnant, B. Don’t think that I didn’t hear you grumbling about your back aching earlier.” Vanessa comes up behind her to massage out the knots in her shoulders and Brooke can’t help but sigh into the touch.

“Dunno what you’re talking about, Ness.” Brooke’s good at handling herself. She’s been trying her best throughout the pregnancy to keep up, to not let things change, despite Vanessa’s tutting about it.

Brooke knows that she’s going to have to cut down on the work soon, for Vanessa’s sake more than anything else. Her wife’s been more worried than she has, always willing to let engagements and presidential business slide for any prenatal appointments, or any moments when Brooke hasn’t been feeling the best. Not that Brooke wants Vanessa to worry too much about her.

As little as she wants to admit it, Brooke’s been enjoying the doting. It had irritated her slightly at first, Vanessa being overly worried and willing to push anything aside for her needs. It had reminded Brooke of when she had been recovering from being shot years and years ago - her natural tendency of wanting to fold in on herself and silently carry on not being possible with Vanessa at her side. But she’s learned, over time. To accept help from those who want to give it. Especially her wife.

“I’m gonna give you a full back massage tonight, regardless.” Vanessa places a kiss to Brooke’s shoulder before coming around to face her.

Brooke grins. “A massage, huh?”

“Get your dirty ass mind out of the gutter. Though that can be arranged, too.” Vanessa winks at her. “Do you need help with your pants?”

Brooke huffs. “I’m pregnant, not incapacitated-”

“-Your belly is also starting to block your view of your feet, baby.” Vanessa ignores Brooke’s protests and grabs her pants, holding them out for Brooke to step into.

Brooke scoffs when Vanessa buttons her pants for her (’There, was that so hard?’), but has to admit to herself that Vanessa’s help speeds up her changing process by quite a bit.

Vanessa tugs on her own blazer as Silky barges into their bedroom. “You got approximately twenty minutes before we gotta go down to the first floor and debrief.”

“Ever heard of knocking, Silk?” Vanessa grumbles underneath her breath when Silky is followed by two baby faced interns, jotting down notes as they look around the room. “These ain’t open quarters.”

Brooke forgets, sometimes, that they’re living in the White House. That the high ceilings and ominous portraits that line the walls hold a long, detailed history. That the low hum of noise that’s always present is because their residence holds not only their living quarters, but also government offices and tours for the public.

“But I’m your best friend and also part of your staff, and the one who has to tell you that your ass is going to be late to meet the Chancellor of Germany, and that ain’t a good look for anyone.” Silky turns towards the interns, whispering something to them before they run off.

Vanessa waves a hand airily. “Angela won’t even be mad. Hell, she gave me a hug the last time that we met. We’re cool.”

Silky shakes her head in disbelief. “I can’t believe you got the nerve to call her ‘Angela’.”

Vanessa shrugs. “That’s her name, ain’t it?”

Brooke has to hold back a smile. She never gets tired of watching Vanessa. It’s refreshing, really, the way her natural charisma tends to lend itself to politics. The way she’s been able to actually accomplish things during her time in office because she can use her likeability to her advantage. It’s an art, one that Vanessa’s truly perfected.

Silky leans back against the bedframe, turning towards Brooke. “Wilson’s looking for you. Something about perimeter mumbo jumbo. Hell if I know.”

Brooke snorts. “So helpful. Thanks though, I’ll contact him.” She pulls out her work phone to call the other agent, talking through the security measures for the Chancellor’s visit.

It bothers Brooke more than she wants to admit, the fact that she can’t physically do the work anymore. Being the one on the front lines, protecting Vanessa. Brooke feels like she should be the one doing it, because how can she trust other people not to make stupid mistakes and put Vanessa in danger?

But she’s been trying. To let go, to relax. To delegate.

To prioritize the fact that she’s growing a small human. Their small human.

She still can’t believe it sometimes, that it’s actually happening.

The one line on the pregnancy test is staring back at her, taunting her, because-

It didn’t work.

Maybe she should take another one. Maybe this first one is lying. Maybe it did work this time. This is their third round of IVF, after all, shouldn’t it have worked by now?

What are they doing wrong?

What is Brooke doing wrong?

“Open up, B. What does it say?”

Vanessa’s fist banging on the door makes Brooke squeeze her eyes shut tight, because no, no, no, Vanessa’s going to be heartbroken because it’s happened again-

“Brooke.” Vanessa’s voice, again. Softer this time. “Can I come in?”

Brooke sniffles (she’s not crying, she’s not crying, when did she start crying?), reaching over from her cross legged position on the ground to unlock the door.

It didn’t work.

Again.

She’s not pregnant.

Again.

“Oh, baby.” Vanessa’s looking at Brooke and scooting onto the floor beside her and her arms are wrapping around her shoulders, squeezing her so tight and for a second the deep pressure is grounding, making everything okay, before their ugly reality rears its head again because the test is still in her hand. Staring up at her. Mocking her. Leering at her.

Brooke’s a failure.

Again.

“I’m sorry, Ness.” The words feel like lead in her mouth, because saying them makes it true - that this cycle of IVF failed. Like the last one, and the one before that. Because the injections, the supplements, the doctor’s visits were all in vain. They made no difference, in the end.

It didn’t work.

“Shhh.” Vanessa’s hand is gentle on her cheek, wiping the tear that’s threatening to fall. “There’s nothing to be sorry about. Let’s make that clear.”

“But-”

“We’re doing everything right, baby, okay? It’s not your fault, it’s not my fault. It’s not either of our faults.” Vanessa’s other hand is running through her hair and a small part of Brooke wonders if she even deserves the comfort.

“But it should have happened by now, what if I’m doing something wrong, what if-”

“Brooke-”

“I can’t, I-”

“Shh.” Vanessa’s arms are around Brooke again, squeezing her tight and somehow it cuts through the fog of her thoughts, the beating of her heart that’s getting faster and faster along with the spiralling in her mind. Vanessa’s bringing Brooke back down, keeping the various pieces of her all together that are so prone to shattering from her thoughts and memories.

“We’ll try again. If you want. Or we don’t have to. But we don’t have to talk about it right now.” Vanessa’s whispers are warm in her ear, soft and reassuring and Brooke almost hates it. That Vanessa has to do this. Be the one to keep them from breaking.

Because that’s Brooke’s job.

“…And then the Secretary of Commerce’s office wants to set up a meeting about the tariffs on the lumber exports, we’ll need to do that before the bill goes in front of the legislature.” Blair’s voice squeaks as she speaks, her eyes flitting between Vanessa and the rest of her team.

“Thank you, St. Clair. Call them and set it up for late next week, maybe Friday in the a.m?” A’keria’s voice is all business as she rifles through her agenda. Vanessa’s glad that she’s got A’keria on as her Chief of Staff. Being in charge of overseeing the office’s day to day flow, she’s adept at keeping everyone in line, from the interns like Blair to Vanessa herself.

Vanessa has to admit, she’s more of a headache to A’keria than any of the interns.

A’keria dismisses the rest of the team, letting them leave the Oval Office before closing the door. “Question, while I work on your schedule. You still serious about this whole parental leave thing?”

Vanessa looks at A’keria as if she’s grown two heads. “Obviously. We’re about to have a baby. Do I look like I can focus on running a country?”

“You’re the President, Vanj. That’s your damn job description.”

“Hey, if the New Zealand Prime Minister took maternity leave when she had her kid way back when, so can I.” Vanessa shrugs, leaning back in her desk chair. “Break the glass ceiling here and all that.”

A’keria rubs at her temples. “Okay, so we’ll get the VP to step in as deputy, fine. You’ll still have to consult here and there during the leave, though, or this whole place will fall to shit.”

Vanessa waves a hand. “Everyone will survive. I’m gonna have more important things to focus on.

The thought makes her stomach do flips every single time.

A baby.

Her and Brooke are going to have a baby.

It’s now been eight months since they found out, since their world had flipped on its axis because it finally became real and now it’s happening, really happening.

Vanessa looks up at the clock. 7:35 p.m. She knows about Brooke’s tendencies to overwork herself, which normally she doesn’t want to interfere with. But the pregnancy has turned Vanessa into a mother hen, one that wants to hover around Brooke and make sure she’s safe and okay, even though she knows it’s probably annoying.

She dials Brooke’s number, waiting for it to ring.

“Hey, V.” Brooke’s voice is soft and Vanessa can almost hear the grin in it.

“Hey yourself.” Vanessa’s brow furrows at the rustling noises in the background of the call. “You still working?”

“Finishing up a meeting.”

Vanessa sighs. “Brooke-”

“I know, I know. We’re done, now.”

“Good.” Vanessa’s can hear how soft her own voice is, in relief more than anything else. “Wanna grab dinner together?”

“Just us?” Brooke’s question makes sense - they’re both used to working through meals a lot of the time, having lunchtime meetings or dinnertime conference calls with those in other timezones or others that they haven’t been able to reach during the day.

“Just us. I don’t have anything until nine, a conference call with the U.S Embassy in Japan.” Vanessa smiles. “Well, the three of us.”

“Yeah. The three of us.” Brooke’s voice is full of marvel. The fact that they’re going to have a baby is becoming more and more real as the months pass. As Brooke begins to show more and more, as every prenatal appointment passes and while confirming that their baby is healthy. But the fact that they’ll get to meet their child in a month and a half, the fact that they’ll go from being a duo to a trio-

It feels unbelievable.

Vanessa’s been through so much with Brooke. Experienced so many highs, so many lows. Experienced so much of what life has to offer, and experienced brushes with death, too.

Soon, they’re going to have a chance to add to their team.

Vanessa heads from the Oval Office over to their private wing of the White House, getting stopped along the way approximately four times to sign various papers and answer questions from harried members of staff. The answers roll off of her tongue like second nature, like she was born to do this.

At the beginning of her first term, Vanessa had felt way, way, over her head, as if she had jumped from a small pond to deep into the Atlantic ocean with no life jacket to keep her afloat. It had been a learning curve despite her many years in politics - learning how to stay on top of things, how to manage not only a bigger staff, but an entire country. The voices of her opponents on the campaign trail had begun to sink into her inner monologue, droning on about how she was too young, too inexperienced, too incapable of the job. They’d made her feel like she was faking it, like she wouldn’t be able to get through.

But Vanessa’s learned, over the years. And now, into her second term, she’s gotten more comfortable with using her natural confidence and abilities, because she knows what she’s doing.

There’s no way she could have gotten this job if she didn’t.

Brooke’s already taking out plates for the two of them when Vanessa reaches the dining room, and Vanessa has to stand on her tiptoes to kiss her, leaning over her belly.

“Baby was extra antsy during the meeting today.” Brooke grabs Vanessa’s hand and places it on her stomach, where a small bulge is protruding.

“His little feetsies!” Vanessa practically squeals when she feels it sticking out.

“Or her.” Brooke grins. “We don’t know that yet.”

“And we’re not finding out until they’re born, so may as well use any and all pronouns.” Vanessa presses a kiss to Brooke’s stomach. “Hi, baby. Been good for your mama all day?”

“Pressing on my bladder like mad.” Brooke huffs. “I had to pee practically every five minutes.”

Vanessa tries to hold back a laugh. “Not gonna lie, I’m glad that it’s you who’s carrying first.”

“Oh, just you wait.” Brooke tosses her hair over her shoulder. “I’m going to have a great time basking it when you have to go through all the pregnancy stuff.”

They grab their food from the trolley that’s been brought up from the White House kitchen. The fact that they don’t have to cook if they don’t want to would be a lot more enjoyable to Vanessa were the two of them not so incredibly busy with work. Though it’s moments like these that Vanessa appreciates not having to grocery shop or wash dishes or work away in the kitchen. She just gets to spend her downtime with Brooke.

“Wanna eat in the den?” Vanessa nudges Brooke’s side. “More comfy.”

“Yeah. My back has been killing me all day, I want to veg out a bit.” Brooke holds up a hand before Vanessa can even open her mouth in concern and say a word. “And yes, you can give me a back massage, and no, I won’t take an easy day tomorrow.”

“Brooke.” Vanessa huffs as they walk over to the den. “You shouldn’t push yourself if you’re-”

“I’m not, V.” Brooke falls down onto the couch with a sigh as she tries to get comfy, shuffling the cushions by her back. “I just want to be active for as long as possible, that’s all.”

Vanessa sticks another cushion behind Brooke for good measure. “Just take care of yourself, okay? You know yourself better than I do, but you also once accidentally cut your finger on a jar and said it was just like a papercut, and then it wouldn’t wouldn’t stop bleeding and then you needed stitches. Stitches!”

Brooke snorts at the memory. “Good times. That was funny. Still got the scar from that. The stitches didn’t even hurt.”

Vanessa’s about to huff, go off again because Brooke is too blasé about her own health sometimes and it worries her, it really does, when Brooke grabs her hand and kisses it. It’s a flimsy tactic, but never fails at making Vanessa absolutely melt.

“I know my limits, Nessa, ‘kay? I’ll be careful, you know that.”

Vanessa sighs. “I do.” It’s just that it makes her nervous, she wants Brooke to be okay, and wants the baby to be okay, and doesn’t want anything to go wrong.

She’s gotten too close to losing Brooke in the past. The sleepless nights Vanessa’s spent in a chair beside a hospital bed, fears that Brooke would never wake up.

Vanessa never wants to experience that ever again.

“Here, watch this.” Brooke puts her now empty plate on the table beside the couch, moving a hand to rub her belly. “I’ve learned exactly how to make him all mad. Discovered it today, during the meeting.”

“Mad?” Vanessa scoots closer, resting a hand on Brooke’s stomach. “And what happened to ‘we don’t know yet?’”

“I know, I know.” Brooke shrugs. “It’s fun to guess, though. Now, watch this. He reacts when I rub the side of my stomach, right here.”

Brooke presses her hand to her side, and Vanessa watches with wonder as her belly moves, their baby active and shifting around. She can’t help but reach out and put her hand beside Brooke’s, letting out a little whoop when she feels their baby kick.

“She’s so active! Or he. Or they. I love them so much already.” Vanessa can’t help the way that she’s already tearing up.

“And here I thought that I was the pregnant, hormonal one.” Brooke’s sniffling too, and Vanessa burrows herself into her side, her heart full and all of the possibilities of the world laid out in front of them.

She’d never thought in her wildest dreams that she would ever get so lucky.

Brooke’s therapist had told her not to bottle things up, stick them in the pretty boxes in her heart, never to be opened again because everything would eventually crumble. The pile of boxes. From all the bad thoughts and thorn laced memories that she didn’t want to think about.

“It’s okay to lean on your wife sometimes,” he had said, “Just like she leans on you.”

They’re in a fancy suite in Boston, because Vanessa is meeting with the state’s senator tomorrow and then has a media blitz day. But Brooke can’t sleep, even though they’re going to have to wake up at 6 a.m. so that Vanessa can look ‘media ready,’ as A’keria puts it.

Brooke tries to distract herself with the plan for tomorrow - how many cars they’re going to take, the way she’s going to distribute the agents for the myriad of events and locations. It normally calms her, soothes her; being a creature of preparedness and having the need for everything being under control. But tonight her stomach is cramping, the pain hollow in her abdomen a reminder of what they’re going through.

The cramping is normal, the doctor had told her. After implantation of the embryos.

But will a pregnancy take?

Will it work?

Or will it be like the last three cycles?

Brooke can’t help but think that maybe it has something to do with her.

She has half a mind to poke Vanessa, wake her from her slumber. Spill all the worries that are building up in her head and threatening to escape at any moment, unless they drive her insane first.

But Vanessa’s fast asleep, her mouth slightly parted as her waves frame her face and for a second she doesn’t even look like the President of the United States. She’s the woman that Brooke fell in love with in a cabin in the woods and nearly died for.

It baffles Brooke every day, the fact that Vanessa loves her. Is married to her. Despite everything, all that’s happened.

Everything that Brooke’s done in her life.

It’s not her, not anymore. But it used to be.

Brooke had murdered people in cold blood, murdered people for money. She had her own fucked up moral code that she used to guide herself in the direction of what was least societally reprehensible, but still.

Doesn’t take away from the fact that she’s extinguished lives. Ended bloodlines, shattered families. No matter if they belonged to douchebags or criminals or whomever. Brooke had still done it. Willingly.

Who is she now to even want to bring a life into this world?

The universe is probably laughing in her face right now, at her absolute audacity to even try again. They’re probably going to find out the same thing a fourth time.

Not pregnant.

It’s not like Brooke deserves to be, anyway, not after what she’s done.

In the past, Brooke had never been one to believe in karma. But the way that her and Vanessa keep trying and trying, the way that they keep seeing friends and coworkers and even people on fucking television announce that they’re pregnant feels like a huge cosmic joke. Like the universe wants to rub it in her face.

Fucked up real bad in the past? Well, she’s going to pay for it now, while bringing Vanessa down with her. Sweet, amazing Vanessa, who deserves better than this. Better than Brooke and all her karmic baggage.

Brooke doesn’t want to wake her. Maybe she’ll talk to her in the morning instead.

Brooke really, really needs watermelon.

Really needs it.

Desperately needs it.

She’d had insane cravings during her second trimester, constantly on the hunt in the White House kitchens for a certain type of ice cream, or her favourite dill pickles. The cravings had died down during the recent weeks, but now they’re back with a vengeance. At nearly nine months pregnant.

Brooke has to get work done for the diplomat visits to the White House over the next few weeks, review the security plans submitted by her agents that are waiting in her email before she officially has to go on leave, but all she can think about is watermelon.

A nice slice of watermelon. The kind that’s super sweet, super juicy, the kind that’s the best in the summer months when it’s hot outside.

She needs some watermelon.

BLH: I need your help.

VVM: What??? Ok coming to your office in 5.

BLH: No wait, just-

Vanessa’s flinging open the door before Brooke can even send her text. It’s convenient, really, that Brooke’s office is so close to the Oval Office. But Vanessa’s looking around the room wildly, looking at her for any signs of distress or pain, and Brooke suddenly feels guilty.

“What’s wrong, baby? Are you hurt? In pain? Do we need to go to the hospital?” Vanessa’s hand is brushing the hair away from her face, her eyes looking her up and down.

“No.” Brooke mumbles because now she’s almost embarrassed. Almost. “I just…”

“You just what?” Vanessa’s crouching beside her desk chair, eyebrows raised. “Spit it out, baby.”

“I want watermelon. I really really want some.” Brooke squeaks out the words, because one of her agents is standing in the doorway, and she’s truly never going to hear the end of the teasing if they catch any of their conversation.

“Watermelon?!” Vanessa’s voice echoes around the room and really, so much for keeping it on the down low. Brooke nearly facepalms. “I ran here in these high ass heels for watermelon?”

“Well, technically I didn’t make you run-”

“Watermelon. Watermelon?”

“In my defense, I really, really need some?” Brooke gives the most angelic smile that she can down to her wife, who’s crouched down on the floor and having a crisis.

“Watermelon.”

“Please?” Brooke pouts and she can see Vanessa’s resolve break, her features immediately melting as she stands back up to press a kiss to her lips.

“Okay, baby. I’ll head down to the kitchen and get you some watermelon.”

Brooke beams, because she really does love her wife. “Thank you.”

Sure, Brooke finds it hard to accept help sometimes. But her pregnancy brain is quite adept at overruling her rational side, something her therapist would be quite impressed with.

Brooke’s happy with the watermelon when Vanessa brings her some, using her stomach like a shelf and resting her bowl on top of it as she types. Her abdomen has been bothering her all day, cramping off and on, though she’s not too worried after their last prenatal visit. Her doctor had said that such cramps were normal towards the end of pregnancy.

Brooke knows to expect it. She’s not going to be a wuss that shows up at the hospital way too early, thinking that she’s having contractions.

Nah, Brooke’s fine. She’s going to keep working. She needs to finish sending these emails, anyway.

Brooke pushes against the armrests of her desk chair to stand up once she hits send on the last email, letting out a grunt as she does. The bathroom’s been calling her name all throughout the work, the baby once again pushing on her bladder with no signs of letting up. She’s ready to waddle over, go to the bathroom for the fourth time today when she feels a slight whoosh.

Her pants are wet.

Brooke lets out a groan, because has she really peed her pants? Does being nearly nine months pregnant make women incontinent?

How embarrassing.

Brooke looks down to assess the state of her clothes, and she’s definitely got a wet spot on her pants, along with one on her chair.

She’s about to grumble and attempt to deal with the mess, except she realizes that she still feels like she needs to pee. So maybe, she hasn’t just peed her pants?

But then…

It doesn’t make sense to Brooke. Her water can’t be broken. She’s still two weeks ahead of her actual due date.

But she’s definitely feeling some sort of leakage, and she still has to pee, and her abdomen is really, really starting to hurt.

“Brooke, baby, I can’t bring you more watermelon, the Chief of Security is in my office right now-”

“Ness, I think my water broke.” Brooke whispers into the phone at her desk, because there are still agents on the other side of her door, and she doesn’t want to cause a stir, really, because maybe it’s not that big of a deal if it’s happened so early-

“WHAT?” Vanessa’s voice blares through the phone and Brooke has to pull the receiver away from her ear, because Vanessa is loud.

“I think so, at least-”

“Forget this meeting, fuck it - whoops, sorry sir - my wife is in labour, I need to go, we can reschedule this, right? A’keria! Reschedule it! Brooke’s in labour!”

Brooke can practically hear Vanessa yelling as she gets closer and closer to her own office, heaving the door open and it’s a good thing Vanessa’s here now, because fuck.

The pains are definitely contractions now.

“Do we need to go? Should I tell one of the interns to call a car? Who should drive? Should I drive?” Vanessa’s pacing in front of her desk and Brooke wants to laugh, really, except she’s having to breathe a little bit harder through the pain.

Not that the pain is that bad. She’s okay, really.

“You’re not going to drive, babe. We’re-” Brooke takes a deep breath, closing her eyes as she can feel another contraction start. “We’ll get someone to drive us.”

“Should I ask Kiki? No wait, I can’t ask Kiki, she said once that she’d failed her driving test in the past. What if she crashes now with us in the car? What if-”

“Ness. We have drivers. We have people employed here who are quite literally drivers.” Breathe, she’s going to breathe. The contraction’s ending.

Vanessa pauses. “Oh. Right. Wait, your baby bag, we haven’t packed one!” She spins on her heel, starting to pace again. “What do we do?”

“Get one of the interns to do it.” Brooke grimaces because damn, her abdomen hurts, and it’s still so early, and are they really about to have a baby?

Vanessa barks an order into her phone and comes around Brooke’s desk, pulling her close. Brooke leans her head against Vanessa’s stomach, who’s still standing and running her fingers through Brooke’s hair.

“Okay. Okay. We can do this. Stay calm.” Vanessa’s muttering under her breath and Brooke looks up at her with an amused smile.

“I am calm.” Brooke is. She’s trying to be, at least, because panicking isn’t going to help and she doesn’t want to start to spiral too early. Maybe she’s not even in labour yet and this is a false alarm.

“I was talking to myself.” Vanessa’s voice is sheepish and Brooke lets out a snort, because of course she was.

Brooke feels another wave of pain hit, stronger this time and lets out a whimper because it hurts, more so than before. Vanessa’s suddenly on the floor beside her, and Brooke can hear her talking (‘It’s okay, baby, you’re okay, you’re okay’) and tries her best to focus on her. Though the way she’s gripping the armrests of her chair is certainly going to make them break.

It feels like an eternity before the contraction passes, even though Brooke’s clock tells her that it’s only been forty five seconds.

“Hey. Hey. Kiki brought the driver. You ready?” Vanessa’s looking up at Brooke expectantly, as if she’s asked the easiest question in the world.

Ready? Are they ready for a baby? Will they be able to be parents? Will they be good parents?

Is Brooke ready to push out an entire baby?

“I am, with you.” It’s true. They can do this. Brooke’s been through so much with Vanessa, survived deadly past careers, wayward gunshots, federal campaigns. Protected her physically from the world while Vanessa kept her together on the inside.

Who’s to say they can’t do this too?

“Yeah. We’re ready.”

#rpdr fanfiction #branjie #brooke lynn hytes #vanessa vanjie mateo #lesbian au #game of survival #oh my sunlight #holtzmanns

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