#verse: a second chance at life

[dorothygalewrites]

RP CHARACTER AESTHETICS (2//??)

Lorenzo Ruiz

" I think I like this little life. "

[recre8ed]

well! i've added some more verses to my blog to make interactions easier. you can consider this post a tag drop as well, but i'm leaving those under the cut.

『 a second chance at scholarly pursuits. 』 ⟶ verse ; genshin.

『 a game into a life. 』 ⟶ verse ; log horizon.

『 a bloodstained golden core. 』 ⟶ verse ; xianxia.

『 a strange and unusual sight. 』 ⟶ verse ; urban fantasy.

[celestialdetected-moved]

In his BG3 verse Arawn's relationship to the undead is really quite fascinating to me. He grew up in a mountainous region that had some old crypts and mines buried deep beneath them, which meant that undead weren't uncommon occurrences. I imagine there was something akin to an undead 'season' in the dead of winter, especially of the kind that like to seek warmth. So there were a lot of undead villains in the children's tales he grew up with, and in every day life.

He follows Lathander, a god who dislikes the undead. However, at his core, he's a believer in redemption. The idea that people are not evil because of the circumstances surrounding their creation and can choose to do good deeds and bad ones.

So fundamentally he views undead creatures like vampires as people, while still acknowledging their fundamental creatureness....I don't know I lost the plot on what I'm trying to say.

[jojoisnomo]

New tags since my nav page is broken anyway...

[yeslordmyking]

John 8:10-11 — Today's Verse for Saturday, August 10, 2024

[pacexlikexaxghost]

Pearl Tag Dump

[diivinidad]

@wildkaart: Yuebei Xing and Fruitie are just going to approach Ao Bing with genuine curiosity, both of them looking at each other for a couple of seconds before looking at the dragon again. The first of the two says something first. "So.... You're family....?" And the tiny fruit fairy, who decides to land on Ao Bing's shoulder, is quick to add to that, "are you our uncle? Or...?"

A couple of meters behind the two are Jidu, observing for now, and Luohou, who is hiding behind his brother. The middle child of the monkey triplet is quite the anxious one. Yuebei Xing speaks again, sharing her name, the fruit fairy introducing themself after and also introducing their brothers before giving a big smile. "It's nice to meet you!"

unprompted asks

initially, he isn't sure what to expect. what should one expect, when approached by three young monkeys & a fruit fairy? it's not exactly a typical encounter, even for a recently - resurrected dragon prince. even for one meeting his cousin's children for the first time.

still, he remains calm, even as the fruit fairy lands upon his shoulder. their collective curiosity is understandable, after all― he himself had not known until very recently that they even existed. mostly because he'd been dead long before they came into the picture.

a small smile graces his lips, then, as he bows his head to the four. no further movement is made, mostly so he doesn't accidentally jostle Fruitie on his shoulder, but the intent is there.

" i do believe that ' uncle ' would be the simplest way of putting it, yes, " he answers with a nod. " my name is ao bing― ao lie is my cousin, but even knowing them for barely over a decade, they were always more like a younger sibling. " a bond that had to largely be hidden away from others for the sake of what was ' proper ', let alone constrained by distance... but of his family members, ao bing did always enjoy time spent with ao lie the most.

" but it's nice to finally meet the four of you as well. & i understand that there is one more of you, no? though, that meeting can come later. for now... i really am delighted to finally meet all of you. "

[zetasattic]

Day 118, Free Verse

I may have taken this same path once or twice But that was then and this is now What was, has been and what is, just is And what’s yet to come we don’t know So why not try again Why give up now Just because it hasn’t Doesn’t mean it wont! This is it, so make the most of everything the best you can ~doc Off the top of my head and without Pez because I didn’t see it this morning. I have…

[magmaprincess]

And his true strength appeared before her: the will of life, of love, of the joy that came from others. There was nothing more powerful than the marking of a hero who would stop at nothing to ensure all those around him were safe. Putting his life at odds before the rest. A selfless hero. Her own emeralds sparkled with an admiration words could not truly explain. Her own face recognizing a purpose she was once robbed in, and life has brought back the boy she was meant to have in the form of Naruto. Her eyes glimmer, dewdrops not of regret but of her own second chance of being the mother she had meant to be.

A son’s will comes fiercest from protecting his mother as she once had done to him, and to return the favor is but a life’s bliss.

Naruto would reach that day when he’d protect the Mizukage as she would in his youth. She would know she had done her motherly duty well to nurture his heart if that were still the case in his aging years. Her heart swells with no doubt here: Naruto intends to gain strength through her nurture. His voice calls her anew. Who was she to stop the will of her precious boy’s wishes?

Her dainty fingers press on her own lips, nodding at his assurance that came from each word, spilling more emotion from her eyes. “Oh!” An exasperated gasp, the Mizukage had the world on her shoulders to carry, but in Naruto, she finally had someone carry her as their world. She melts at his smile. “I believe....I believe it Naruto...!”

They say the sun is the best healing anyone could get; the Mizukage was going to get the sun tenfold in its walking form—beautiful, loving, her son.

“I am all the luckier to have been brought you, darling. Akawarai and I will make sure you see your dreams come to life. You best believe that too!” A dainty finger magically taps at his nose, before she can’t restrain the strong hold, she’s allowed himself to watch him, glow brighter than any star.

And in her next seize, she’s all the warmer, bundling her precious boy even closer to her heart. ♡

"It's not...like I had any real control or knowledge." He states. "The power. It just came to me in moments of emotional turmoil or need." He wasn't really in control, but he's tapped into it a few times. The Valley of the End was where he went the furthest and it seemed to have its effect on him now. His senses felt stronger, his nails were akin to claws, and more was yet to come. He seems to enjoy her touch more than he'd ever admit right now, but then she speaks of protecting him. She touches her forehead to his and his brows furrow. He might consider this heaven if he didn't feel his own heart beat faster with her being this close. The joys of a boy's crush. "That's not going to stop me. You should know that I...am very very strong in what I say. My word is my ninja way. I never go back on it." A smile finally crept onto his face. A face now weathered by battle more than any thirteen year old should ever be. "So you best believe I'm going to get strong enough to protect you. There's nothing that'll change my mind on that." His blue eyes sparkled with a growing new life and determination. She could try her best to tell him he need not try, but anyone with half a brain could tell this young soul was as hard headed as they came - hard headed and unbreakable like steel. She had given him purpose, home, and perhaps even saved him from himself. Those things now put Naruto into positions to become a rising star among Kirigakure. All that had to be done was to be there for him at his most crucial moments going forward. Naruto did eventually free himself from Mei's hands and her forehead touch. It was only so he could look at her properly. "I won't let you and whoever rescued me down either. I'll master the Kyuubi's power, grow strong, and put my all into becoming the strongest shinobi Kirigakure has ever seen! Believe it!" He smiled wider now. His smile was like the sun - radiant, warm, and restorative.

[minhosimthings]

Epilogue || 18+

Synopsis: Sex had never felt so good, as it did now, with your new husband.

Pairings: husband!Jay × wife!reader

Warnings: smut minors Dni, thigh riding, oral (f receiving), multiple orgasms, overstimulation, p in v sex, penetration, degradation, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), rough sex, dom!Jay, sub!reader, breeding kink, mention of pregnancy, cumming inside, JayYn forever I love these idiots

A/N: and we come to an end with the Lucifer series! Thank you for all the support on this series, I truly loved writing it and I hope you all like this tiny bonus 😙🎀

Series Masterlist

The first time Jay ever saw you was in fourth grade. He remembered that story like the back of his hand. The first thing he recalled was the fact that you were so short you couldn't reach the coat hangers, so he had to help you hang your too big coat up. That was the first kindle that ignited the flames of your friendship.

The second kindle was when you were introduced to him as 'your new neighbour Y/N'. Your parents had recently moved to the town and bring the social butterfly she was, Jay's mother promptly marched him over to your new house with a jar of homemade cookies. Jay remembered how you and him had devoured all of the cookies without a thought, only to get stomach aches and scoldings from both your mothers.

Jay had introduced Heeseung to you at the start of fifth grade, having trusted you enough to welcome you into his own group of friends, of which Heeseung was his best. Jay's entire world for most of his cringey teenage and depressing young adult years were you and Heeseung. And he had been thankful for that.

Until he found himself falling in love with you.

Falling desperately, hopelessly, painfully in love with you. If anyone had asked him about what he loved about you, he would have had a seven verse poem written already. As if that was enough for him to express everything he held within his the deepest crevices of his heart for you. He loved you on purpose, truly and fully, as heartbreak loved a woman and as misfortune loved a daughter.

But as love always went, Jay was hesitant. He was scared. What if you didn't feel the same way? It would have ruined your friendship and the deep bond between you two if Jay ever told you what he truly felt, about the way his stomach would erupt in butterflies whenever you'd fix his hair and the way you made him weak in the knees everytime you laughed at one of his dad jokes.

Then came Seattle.

Jay's father has received a promotion and they were to move to The States. A new chance at at life, as his mother had enthusiastically put it. But there was no enthusiasm or happiness in it for Jay. Sure, he would be moving somewhere new, somewhere where dreams were supposed to be fulfilled, but what about his life until then? What about Heeseung and you? What about the life he wanted to have with you for the rest of eternity?

So came the waterworks. The final look of anguish on your face at the airport remained etched into Jay's memory forever, even from the distance he could clearly see the tear stains on your face, and Heeseung's arms pulling you into a hug with a final nod to Jay. It tore his heart apart, but he promised himself that he'll dig his way back to you if it was the last thing he'd do.

That is, until he moved back to Seoul, and found himself face to face with you and Heeseung. With matching rings on your fingers and a lovesick smile on your face. Or atleast that was how he imagined it. He didn't even take the time to glance at your longing expression, heavily disguised under the cheerful grin on your face.

You did love Heeseung, yes, but what good was that love when the man you've wanted since eight grade was right in front of you? Sitting in the same elegant position, holding his glass of gin in the same peculiar way that had always made you laugh, what good was any love when it was not the love you wanted?

Or perhaps the love you lusted after, the dangerous kind of love. The adventurous kind of love. The love that made your eyes linger over him whenever you'd pay Heeseung a visit at the police station, only to find Jay looking at you with pity as he glanced towards the empty desk labelled with your ex husband's name next to him.

The love that made you want to absolutely devour him as he sat leaning back in his armchair, legs spread dangerously wife apart, that caused warmth to spread between your thighs and saliva to accumulate in your mouth.

Jay looked at you with eyes full of lust, like he was a tiger on a hunt and you were his lamb, dolled up in a white dress with a glittering diamond ring on your finger. You had practically fought him not to buy you something so expensive, but Jake and Sunghoon had shrugged their shoulders with an 'i told you so' look when you walked in with a look of defeat.

"Come 'ere." Jay mumbled, tapping his index finger on his thigh, his own ring shone spectacularly against the golden shade of his skin. You promptly walked over, dragging your dress along with you. It was a pretty dress, you had to admit, you didn't think Jake and Sunghoon would have been such experts in suggesting wedding dresses, but you were proven wrong.

"Pretty little doll..." Jay's arms promptly went to your waist, as you say yourself down on his thigh, forearms resting on his shoulder. His right hand, crawled up your back, to where the zipper of your dress lay stagnant. You pressed your body closer to his, your clothed pussy practically grinding against the course material of his trousers. Jay's soft, cherry pink lips, touched your neck agressively, leaving hues of red behind for everyone in town to know whose you were.

Jay's fingers fiddled with the zipper for a minute before he pulled it down completely, to reveal the white lace of your bra. It barely hid anything, your perked up nipples were clearly visible and your cleavage was a valley Jay wanted to dive into and make a home out of.

Jay's hands palmed your bare back as he ripped your dress off of you, eliciting a moan out of your mouth as you saw his muscles flex ever so slightly, thought the fabric of his silk shirt. Your fingers also went to the buttons of his shirt, unbuttoning the first three before Jay perked his thigh up, the fabric now hitting your clothed cunt. You gasped at the sudden sensation.

"So impatient aren't you, love?" Jay connected his lips to yours in a short kiss, "Tell me what you want baby."

"You're allowing me that privilege?" You chuckled, trying hard not to stare down at his chiseled chest, "That's too kind of you Mr Park."

"Would you prefer if I was rougher, Mrs Park?" Jay wore a handsome smirk on his face, the hand which settled on your back, squeezed it ever so slightly, making you squirm. Jay's fingers danced up your legs, slowly making their way up your legs until he reached the waistband of your panties. His devilish smirk only grew in size as you lifted your hips just enough for him to slide the thin fabric down your milky thighs to expose your slick center.

"Needy little slut aren't you doll?" Jay whispered in your, sending shivers down your spine, "All wet for me, and I haven't even touched you."

"Maybe you're just that handsome." You responded with a cheeky smile. You started to slowly roll your hips into Jay's stomach, your soaked pussy rubbed harshly against his trousers. Jay could feel the spot on which you sat comfortably getting wetter by the second.

"Or maybe I'm just that pretty." You said again, adding fuel to the fire, "Well, a pretty girl like me shouldn't be with a man like you should she?"

As you went to pull away, he grabbed your arm gently, his grasp firm around your skin, before bringing you back down to his level and pressing his lips into your mouth, a searing hot kiss igniting you into a pile of flames, a mountain of ash at the feeling of his touch.

You kissed him back, eyes shutting tight like a stone door, your body leaning in to his as his tongue dragged across your own. That elicited a moan from the back of your throat, and without exactly meaning to, you felt yourself grinding against him.

"Pretty girl like you deserves to be fucked like the whore she is, doll." His fingernails drew marks over your skin, adding to your pleasure. The drag of your clit against his muscular thigh causes you to whimper, pressing yourself harder to his skin, as if trying to obliviate the mere atoms of space between the both of you. His large calloused hands guide your hips, moving you up and down his thigh.

Soon the throbbing in your cunt got stronger, your clit begging for more friction, something to relieve the pressure building up in your lower stomach. You give an experimental rock of your hips, freezing to wait for Jay's reaction. When he doesn't respond you do it again, setting a steady rhythm as you grind down on his lap.

The zipper on the front of his slacks rubs perfectly against your sensitive clit, the pleasure increasing with every roll of your hips, head burying further into the crook of Jay's neck, his masculine scent filling your nose. Your pussy is dripping now, your empty hole flutters and pulses as you continue grinding in Jay's lap, too lost in pleasure to register the tiny whimpers leaving your mouth.

Speeding up your movement, hips pressing down harder into his, a breathy moan of his name falls from your lips as you're about to reach your peak. Just as you feel yourself tumbling over the edge, two strong, cold hands firmly grab your hips, halting your movement completely.

You whine desperately at the loss of your orgasm, hips frantically chasing more of that delicious friction that would have your cunt gushing, but it's useless. Jay's vice-like grip prevents any of your movements, cold fingers bruising as they dig into the soft flesh of your hips.

"Not so soon, sweetheart." Jay smirked at your shocked expression, you looked adorable to him with widened eyes and an agape mouth, "My spoilt little princess."

"Jay please..." You whine out of annoyance, but his grip stayed strong on your body, practically leaving scars there from how strong it was.

"Poor baby, begging for me." Jay snickered, sending shivers down your spine, "Tell me what you want darling—tongue, fingers or cock?" One of his hands went down to your thigh, giving it a light squeeze, eliciting a moan out of you.

"T-Tongue." You spluttered out, as Jay kept groping your thigh. He snickered once more, his ego grew in size as he watched you sink into an abyss at his mere touch.

"Good girl." Jay simply replied, before tightly securing his hands round your hips. He lifted you up with ease, and places your feet on the ground, before getting up himself and picking you up again. One of his hands wound round your waist and one of them went to your ass, squeezing it mischievously. He meticulously carried you to the bed, which by the look of it, had new silken sheets, just waiting to be ruined.

The feeling of the soft fabric seduced you as you allowed your body to relax into the mattress. Your eyes flickered over to Jay, whose figure could be seen outlined by the faint golden light of the lamp placed on the bedside table. The carved muscles of his back enamoured you into a trance as you stared at your new husband take off his shirt. His hands went to his newly bought leather belt and he took it off in one swipe, loosening up his trousers which soon came off to reveal his hardened cock. Your mouth filled to the brim with saliva as you stared at it.

"It's not good to stare, sweetheart." Jay chuckled, turning to you, his gaze set fire to your skin, "Now—" his mouth morphs into a lopturned smirk, "—you said tongue didn't you?"

The only response he got was a weak whimper when his hands roamed over your thighs, spreading your legs apart. You gasped softly at the feeling of his breath hitting your skin.

Jay peeled open your pussy, revealing your glistening slit to his hungry eyes. He watched the way your arousal pooled at the tight hole of your cunt, the way your clit hardened at the feeling of the cold air. Your hands snaked down to his head, and you dragged your fingers through his hair, his name falling from your tongue like a melody.

"Jay—stop teasing." You whined, not having the patience anymore to wait for his heaven-trained tongue to get stuck inside your pussy.

His eyes find yours again, and he kept them there as he traced his lips north. He nosed the juncture of your cunt and inner thigh, running a tongue along your mound. You gasped and eyes narrowed, watching him with rapt attention. He pressed a kiss to the top of your slit and his hands come up to open you to him, pulling the lips apart and tonguing the collected moisture there. Your head fell back as your elbows gave way, falling flat against the blanket. 

"god, just like that," you groan as he brushes against your g-spot and circles his tongue around your clit.

Jay's tongue swirls in lazy circles against your clit, hands gripping your trembling thighs to anchor you to him. His mind is hazy with desire, lost in the taste and scent of you, the feel of your body under his touch. He can't get enough of you, craving more and more until he's completely satisfied, which he knows will take hours at the very least.

All you can hear are the brazen sounds of his slurps and sucking along with his ragged breathing and you scream and whine as your hands reach out weakly to push his shoulders away, the pleasure running through your nerves, strangling your throat in the process.

“Ahh-! Jay- wait..!” He doesn't listen to your pleads to get him to stop, the pleasure almost unbearably good. How could he stop? His sweet tooth craves for his sweetheart’s sloppy cunt almost all the time.

He’s enjoying every second of it, listening to how noisy you’re getting, the screeches and moans escaping your lips, barely managing to form words to escape those pretty lips he loves to shove his cock into.

Your moans were getting higher and higher as your back arched to feed more of yourself to him, desperately craving the feel of his touch, of his nose, of his beard against your thighs, of the lips he so devoutly was using to suck on your most sensitive spot.

As his tongue continues exploring your clit with need, you push against his shoulders but fail, his strong grip keeping you locked in position.

Nonetheless you keep trying, far too overstimulated for your own good. You try to get his hands to release their firm grip of holding your thighs up, but you fail again, then try pushing his head away, yet you fail again, your attempts futile.

"Fuck—oh Jay!” You wailed a wanton amount, enough for the whole neighbourhood to shake due to the sheer pleasure you’re feeling. The white pain mixing with adrenaline sends you right to the edge of teetering release.

“Can’t you please just— Ah! fuck me already!” There it was, the only permission he ever needed.

Jay was quick to pull his skilled tongue out and move his hands from your thighs to your hips, getting himself steady on top of you. The sudden movement caught you off guard, even more so, when his lips landed on yours. You tasted the faint bits of yourself on them and you relished it all, arching yourself further into him. He was your husband now, and you made sure that you took full advantage of that.

"So fucking pretty." Jay whispered after pulling away. One of his hands cupped your cheek while the other remained on your hip. Jay was quick to withdraw his hand and trace it back to your hip.

“You ready?” he asked, licking his lips before pulling his cock out, already covered in pre-cum. He looked so beautiful above you, his hips so close to yours, his hair falling into his face and his chest raising as fast as yours. You looked a mess, but you were his mess and he wanted to devour you.

He was tender with you, his fingertips light across the length of your body as he felt you, his touch delicate- as though you were a statue that could break at any moment. He was going to take his time with you. He was going to devote himself to the religion that was your weeping cunt.

Yet, in a play of duality, the moans, the lewd moans that crawled up your throat were filthy, even filthier than the sound of how wet, how unbelievably drenched you were as he plunged into you over and over, as he literally used you as a fucktoy, filling you up more and more, until he was finally sat inside you to the very hilt, until his pubic hairs were grazing your skin and the tip of his cock was touching your cervix.

"Fucked out already, love?" Jay snickered at you, he knew his words always made you weak.

You managed a weak glare, but it melted into a moan as he pushed into you. The stretch was intense, making you claw at his shoulders for support. He kissed your neck, his lips and teeth leaving a trail of fire as he pulled out slowly before thrusting back in deeply. You moaned at the sensation, your body arching to meet his every movement.

You opened your eyes slowly, your vision filled with the sight of him. His beautiful, sweat-covered face was close to yours, the grey in his eyes adding to his rugged appeal. His aura burned with an intensity that made your heart race.

His pace quickened, his hips snapping against yours with a ferocity that left you breathless. The room was filled with the sounds of your combined moans, the slap of skin against skin, and the wet, obscene noises of your coupling. His free hand roamed over your body, caressing and squeezing, leaving trails of fire in its wake.

“Jay– more,” His eye flits up to your face, asking for silent reassurance that that is indeed what you want. “For god's sake Jay, move faster please I–” Not needing to be told twice, Jay picks up speed. Where his thrusts were slow and sensual, now they are fast and hard. He fucks you like a man starved, as if he was told this is the last woman he will ever lay with. Which in his case, was true, since you were married after all. 

It all feels so, so good. Your mind is a hazy mess with only thoughts of him and his fat fucking dick. Every time his tip meets that spongy spot inside of you, you feel like you're seeing stars as drool runs down your chin. When was the last time you ever got your guts rearranged like this? In fact, when was the last time you even felt the touch of a man? Heeseung surely had done it, but it was surely never as pleasurable as this.

Those questions were swept away in the flurry of pleasure brought by Jay's cock sliding in and out of your pussy with a wet squelch, your body rocking back and forth with the force. He relished the sight under him, your sweaty body splayed out so prettily for him as he brought you to new heights.

"Damn... You're so fucking tight—"He grinned as you responded with nothing but incoherent babbles, too dumbed down to even form a proper sentence. "—sucking in my cock like it never wants to let it go, honey..."

Jay brought one of his hands down to grab your breast, fondling the mound and squeezing before tweaking your nipple between the pads of his thumb and index. That action elicits a hiss out of him as he feels you clench down harder around him, making him let out a breathy chuckle

"Haah... You liked that, didn't you, doll?" His answer comes in the form of another pornographic moan, "...What if I gave you a child, huh? —Fuck—! You like the thought, love? Letting me fuck a baby into you?"

"Jay—ah shit!" You screamed, feeling your gummy cunt being attacked by his tip, "N-Need your cum—please!"

Jay would have been lying if he said the thought wasn't enticing, getting to raise a child with you that's his own. It was something he'd been dreaming of for the longest while. You weren't sure if you could have children, but Jay would at least attempt to make it happen. Even if it meant pumping you full of his cum till your belly bloats from the amount he's emptied into you. It drives him to go a bit faster, his cock reaching deep as your walls spasm around him.

You gasp out his name as your arms tighten around him. Hearing a chuckle, he did it again. "What happened baby?" He cooed, you could hear the smirk dripping from his voice. But you were too distracted making noises to complain.

“My dumb little girl, just love getting her needy cunt fucked hm? there sweetheart? yeah feels good doesn’t it?” He up his pace, even if you thought that was impossible. His cock continues to drill inside you with the tip expertly hitting your heavenly spot.

It doesn’t take long to feel the first flutterings of that eye-wateringly beautiful sensation between your legs. The force of his thrusts, and the friction against your clit cause you to see stars behind your eyes. With one last scream of his name, you cum around his cock. Your walls pulling him in, attempting to root him to you. Jay however, does not let up, chasing afer his own release. You quickly stammer, “I’m cumming! Fuck!”

“Cum for me. Right now give it to me, baby, come on” Jay pistons his hips with slower pace but deeper, sliding himself unbelievably full to your cunt, with a prominent bulge on your lower tummy.

Jay’s legs nearly gave out underneath him, hearing your sweet words. As your pussy contracted in wet bursts around him again, Jay released every drop of cum inside of his body, deep into your walls so that you could feel yourself becoming full and it beginning to drip out as it became too much.

Jay didn’t move and kept his cock inside you, letting himself and you calm down and try to catch your breath. As you regain your composure, your head against Jay's chest, your mind almost exploded with the overwhelming thoughts.

You definitely were not on the pill.

You and Jay winced in union as he slowly pulled out, careful not to waste any of his seed, which stayed buried deep within you. You could see the shine of the thin line of sweat on Jay's body as he slumped down on the mattress next to you. He looked ethereal, like a God in his own kingdom.

"You ok, love?" Jay murmured in his deep voice, which sounded tired.

"You're asking me that now, asshole?" You chuckled breathlessly, your chest riding and falling according to your hasty breaths, "I'm not on the pill by the way." You added, with uncertainty coating your tone.

You felt Jay's arms quickly wrap around you, pulling your head into his chest. He smiled down at you, pressing a saccharine-sweet kiss to your sweaty forehead. You winced at the feeling of your sore legs moving slightly on the bed.

"Good." Jay said, "I wasn't planning on having any protection anyway."

"Jay!" You gasped playfully, softly hitting his chest, "Don't say that!"

"Or what?" He smirked.

"Or I'll make you a dad." You managed a cheeky smile, feeling drops of sleep drip onto your eyes.

"Gladly, my love."

Taglist: @diorsyun @jaeyunluvr @hoondrop @mxxninthesky @alvojake @wondipity @blurryriki @lilyuwon @heeliopheelia @pshazez @heeslomll @seunghancore @shiningnono @deobitifull @luvitria @nyfwyeonjun @hwa-0403 @bubblegyu00 @sunpov @heeheeswifey @chartrucewhore @slut4hee @heesangs-blog @rikiwaify-blog @hirablackcat @soobieboobiedoobiedaboobie @kirinaa08 @heeshlove @seokseokjinkim @brownsugarbaybee @yzzyhee @anittamaxwynnn @kgneptun @penny44224 @ribbioniki @strxwbloody @immelissaaa @nshmrarki @yawnzzhoon @sousydive @yunhoswrldddd

[dorothygalewrites]

RP Character Aesthetics (1//?)

Desideria Monroe

“ Breath, should I take a deep? Faith, should I take a leap? Taste, what a bittersweet. All my, all my life let me face, let me face, let me face my fears. Oh, let me face, let me face, let me face my fears. Won't be long, won't be long, I'm almost here. ”

[wandasaura]

TWO PEOPLE UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER

summary — in an attempt to get wanda’s attention, you end up warming the strap you hoped she’d fuck you with.

warning(s) — established relationship, married wandanat, dom/sub dynamics, strap-on usage, mommy kink, brief daddy kink, cockwarming, holding/accidental wetting, degradation, praise, aftercare, oral fixation, subspace, humiliation, ¿nursing?, idk you suck on wanda’s tits, domestic fluff, men/minors dni

authors note — if you’re familiar with the song peace, i thought the lyrics from the second verse fit this little moment so perfectly! mommy wanda lovers this one is for you, it was heavily requested so nobody look at me! there’s also some soft daddy nat for those that wanted to see more of her

you are in love universe

♥️⊹ ˚ . 18+, men/minors dni ⁺ 𓈒 ꒰💌꒱ ♡ ･ mommy maximoff ✧

You should have learned a long time ago that acting out with Wanda never ended the way you wanted it to. Natasha was easy to get what you wanted out of, a few bats of your eyelashes and a whispered cry of Daddy had her backtracking in seconds, but Wanda was unforgiving and found pride in that fact. You’d gained your footing in this new dynamic rather easily, and on some days, the three of you worked so perfectly together that it felt like you’d been a couple for your entire life, not merely a few weeks.  Wanda and Natasha had fallen into a healthy balance of being your girlfriends and being your dominants. There were days that passed without an ounce of tension, but other days feel like a battlefield. You still weren’t sure how to ask for what you needed from them, which is how you found yourself in the position you’re in now. With summer still lingering through the streets of Westview, you slept between warm bodies every night. There was no indication of what mood you woke up in when daylight painted the sky, but Natasha and Wanda had learned to wait for your not-so-subtle tells. When your eyes peeled open, it was easiest to gauge what side of you they were dealing with. When you wanted to spend the day, or at least a couple hours of your morning, as just their girlfriend, they gave you that without hesitance. Wanda giggled with you in the kitchen and Natasha tackled you onto the couch demanding cuddles, and it always felt easy and real. Other days, when you weren’t so willing to harbor full control of your life, you woke up clinging to your Daddy. It was always Natasha you sought out first thing in the morning, but Wanda can’t complain when she’s the one being smothered throughout the night. They were happy to be whoever you wanted them to be, but they’d slowly been working you up to asking for yourself. 

This morning was one of those days where Wanda decided that if you wanted something from her, you needed to ask and not just with your actions, but with your words. Natasha had gone into the office to oversee a development in a new high-profile case, leaving you to follow the Sokovian around the house like a little lost duckling. Where Wanda went you went, simple as that, well, unless of course she managed to close the door before you could get behind it. That had led to a series of whines and angrily stomped feet, but even then she hadn’t budged then. She hadn’t budged until you had wandered into her office with your hands clasped behind your back. She’d gone to ask what you needed, attempted to give you yet another chance to tell her that you needed your Mommy, but you’d dropped an all black strap-on into her lap and pouted at her with needy eyes before she could get the words out. When she’d pulled her linen shorts down her thighs and attached the harness around her hips, you’d thought you had won. When she told you to get into her lap and take the strap down to the hilt, you were sure that you had won. 

In case it wasn’t clear, you hadn’t won. It had been an hour since she’d asked you to come settle onto her lap and take the strap into your dripping pussy. You’d complied easily, sank down on the toy without her help, and had started grinded your hips against hers in a manner that forced the base to rock against her core perfectly. That pleasure hadn’t lasted long, barely three minutes, and just as your hips had found a comfortable pace, Wanda placed a bruising grip on your hips and completely stilled your movements.  Her lips had been wet when they kissed at the side of her neck, and a pleased hum reached your ears as she used a single slender finger to point your chin toward the ceiling. The full expanse of your neck had been both visible and biteable in that moment, and it hadn’t taken any convincing for her teeth to settle firmly into your skin. You found it laughable that at the start of your contract with Natasha, you’d likened her to a vampire, but Wanda was truly the vampire in your relationship. She possessed an incessant need to dig her teeth into any part of you that she could touch, and you allowed her to eagerly. She’d cooed at your whine when it tumbled from your lips, but there hadn’t been an ounce of sympathy in her face when she asked you, “What do you do to get what you want?” 

“Ask.” You had responded with bated breath, your eyes murky with lust that had been ignored for hours. If Natasha were here she’d have already fucked you raw, but Wanda wasn’t afraid of the long game. She’d never been shy about making you work for what you wanted, and even months into your dynamic with her, not as a couple but as a dominant and her submissive, it never failed to fluster you. Wanda was softer when you shared intimate moments outside of your dynamic. She still never let you top, but she was more lenient in giving in. Her being so firm with you had only cemented in your mind that she knew what you wanted, and the entire day leading up to you warming her strap had been merely a game to her. 

“Mmhm.” She had hummed haphazardly in response, and her hands had still been settled roughly on your hips but her eyes had left yours to trail over the documents that splayed across her desk in messy highlighted piles. You hadn’t had the slightest clue as to what she was really doing, but the rare sight of her so disorganized had felt serious. “And since you didn’t use your words, what happens?” 

You had whined and shook your head in a pleading protest, not wanting to lose your voice when you knew exactly what you wanted. Wanda hadn’t folded at your soft whine, she’d done the exact opposite. The tips of her fingers had pulled your hips down harder against the toy buried deep within your weeping walls, and the head of the dildo had nudged against your softest spot and made your torso fall slack against her chest. “Y-You decide what happens.” You’d finally forced the words into the space between your bodies, and it was rewarded with a sharp thrust of her hips that drove the strap-on further into your pussy. 

“That’s right. What should I decide, hm? I think I’d like to have my pretty little girl warm my strap for a while. What do you think about that idea?” She hadn’t really been asking you. You would’ve been condemned to the same fate even if you’d said no, but you found yourself nodding your head at her question despite how horrible it sounded to sit with your aching cunt filled with pleasure it couldn’t fully claim. “Good girl. Now settle down, Mommy has work to do that little girls shouldn't even be in here to see.” She had guided your head down onto her shoulder, forcing you into near complete darkness before her hands left your hips and returned to the stacks of important documents on her desk. 

You’d tried to remain still, knowing it was what she wanted and she’d have to reward your good behavior at some point, but as the minutes ticked by slower and slower not only did your core demand attention, your bladder demanded relief. The wiggling of your hips hadn’t been reprimanded when the movements started. Wanda had only hummed and shifted beneath you, easing the strap-on into a new position that did nothing for your desperate need to pee. She’d been keeping good on her promise of getting you to drink more water, and you couldn’t help but wonder if this was the exact predicament she had wanted you in when she forced you to finish an entire glass in the kitchen. Surely it wasn’t. Surely she didn’t want you squirming on her lap from sensations that weren’t caused by her, that wouldn’t make any sense. 

When your wiggling became more frantic and you couldn’t decide whether you wanted to moan out in ecstasy or sob in frustration, Wanda sighed and dropped her pen onto the stack of papers that she’d very nearly gotten through completely. Your full and sensitive bladder made the strap-on drenched with arousal feel so much better. Every time Wanda inhaled too deeply or exhaled too sharply, you felt every grove of the cock rub against your walls. The sensation was sharp, fleeting, but embarrassingly addicting and you found yourself trying to replicate little actions that provoked it. Wanda wasn’t as unaware of your intentions as you’d hoped, and when you wiggled a bit too harshly in her lap, finally being rewarded with the quick burst of pleasure, her fingers found your hips again and stilled them just as quickly as she did the first time. 

“Keep still.” She sighed her demand, keeping her tone unbothered which only further provoked your desperation. It was always particularly hot when she acted as though your body writhing against hers had no effect on her. Despite leaving her pen to sit abandoned on the desk, you hadn’t felt her eyes burn into your skin throughout the entire exchange. Your face was still pressed into her neck, hiding in the darkness that you hoped would make this situation less humiliating. 

When you finally had the courage to look up at her, unable to keep yourself still any longer, you cupped her cheeks and directed her attention onto you. “I have to go to the bathroom.” You whispered softly, beyond humiliated with the reluctant admission. Your face turned a flush shade of pink that Wanda thought complemented your eyes perfectly, and you knew you had her full attention when her pupils dilated just the farthest bit more. There was hardly any green left in her stare, but you clung to what little color remained. 

“What was that, little one? Mommy couldn’t hear you.” Wanda pouted her lips, her eyes filled with innocent confusion that wasn’t at all authentic. She’d heard you perfectly clear, you were too close to her face for the words to have fallen short before they met her ears, but she wasn’t letting go of your hips without a further explanation and you didn’t know how much longer you could hold yourself together for. 

“I have to pee.” You said just the faintest bit louder, hoping your pleading eyes would be enough to convey the desperation you felt within your weeping core and taut bladder. You felt so incredibly full, and every time you took a breath that feeling only intensified. 

“Oh, well you can hold it just a little bit longer I’m sure. Mommy’s almost done.” Wanda smiled a sweet sympathetic smile, the grip on your hips slowly becoming softer as she let the pads of her thumb soothe the aching skin with tight soft circles you wished would land somewhere else. 

“I can’t.” You pleaded with her to understand just how badly you had to go, you’d already been holding it for so long trying to make her proud. Wanda frowned at your plea, her cherry tinted lips the only thing you could focus on. 

“Well that’s too bad, milaya.” She said simply, shrugging her shoulders in a nonchalant manner that made your walls clench and your clit throb. “Try harder for Mommy, I’m sure you can do it.” She conceded when your frown didn’t waver, and ever so softly she pecked your lips before things went back to how they were before you’d interrupted her. Your head was guided back down onto her shoulder, and her hands went back to work shuffling through documents that you could only assume she was annotating. 

Another half hour had passed before you couldn’t hold yourself together anymore. You’d lasted longer than you’d anticipated with her full you felt, but the end was in sight as the muscles in your belly fought vicious wars to keep your dignity. You were so close to the edge that even Wanda’s gentle breathing felt like pin pricks against your spine. As your need to relieve yourself grew more intense, so did the coil in your belly that seemed to find fuel in your desperation. A soft cry tumbled past your lips before the dam broke and the coil snapped. You dampened her lap with more than just arousal, and the wet feeling that spread across hers and your thighs only made you cry harder. Moans tumbled past your lips when your cries fell short, and it became a desperate attempt to both seek harder pressure against your clit and get completely away from the wetness that was quickly becoming cold against yours and her naked skin. 

“Oh baby, did you have an accident?” Wanda cooed sympathetically, not even having to look down at your glazed over eyes to know what headspace you’d tumbled into. Your cries weren’t one of pain, nor were they really ones of frustration either. You weeped with humiliation and the desperate need to finally be spoken to. She’d been merely answering you all day, no ounce of elaboration in the short sentences shared. You needed your Mommy, and Wanda wasn’t going to deny you that any longer when you’d been so good for her. Granted, the accident hadn’t been a part of her plan. She’d only intended to make you hold yourself, but she couldn’t deny that it was hot, though a little uncomfortable to be sitting in a cold and wet chair. Despite wanting to get away from the mess, Wanda remained in her chair and devoted her attention to you. In truth, she’d finished her paperwork twenty minutes ago, she’d just been waiting for you to finally break. “Why didn’t you tell Mommy you needed to go potty, silly girl?” 

The words weren’t fully registering in your head, every noise felt miles away and muffled by thick cotton on your ears. If you’d been in a sounder mind, you would have snapped your gaze up to her so quickly that your neck would’ve broken, but that never came. You’d warned her as well as you could that if she didn’t let you up this would happen, but she had taken her chances and the outcome had been exactly what you’d expected. Wanda hummed soothingly when you burrowed your face into her shoulder and your mouth went to work on the little bits of skin that were available beside the collar of her t-shirt. The cock still in your pussy was the farthest thing from your mind, but when Wanda shifted you into her arms so she could finally stand and move away from your accident, you whined at the sensation of your full cunt being empty for the first time in hours. 

“Shh, it’s okay, malen’kaya. You’re okay.” Even in Natasha’s absence the Sokovian spoke Russian. She had no real connection to her native language that had died when her brother did, and whatever she said to you in this moment would fall upon deaf ears anyway. It didn’t matter what language she let fall past her lips, all that you could comprehend in this state was that your Mommy’s arms were wrapped tightly around you and she was so cruelly pulling something away the only thing that had been with you for hours. “We’re gonna get you all cleaned up. Just be patient with Mommy.” Leaving her office chair to be handled at a different time, she honestly might just order a new one, having no intense attachment to the black swivel chair that’s only purpose was to sit on, Wanda carried you back into the master bedroom.

She made quick work of undressing you, soothing your whines of protest when the cold air ambushed your flush and warm skin. Your shorts and panties had been discarded on the floor of her office, so all she had to strip you out of was one of Natasha’s old t-shirts that you had found in the back of the closet and adamantly adored. You reached for her throughout the entire process, a far away look in your eyes as you barely even registered her face coming so close to yours that her breath splayed across your lips. She kissed you softly, capturing your full attention as you returned the embrace, all the while her hands were pulling the piss soaked strap-on off of her hips and away from her core that throbbed to be dealt with, but she could handle the unsatisfied ache. Unlike you, Wanda was particularly fond of edging, the only problem that came with her interest was she never relinquished control for long enough to ever have it be done to her. 

You huffed when she pulled away from your lips in favor of throwing her t-shirt onto the floor with the already existing pile of your own clothes. She left you laying alone in the center of the bed, making a mental note to throw the comforter in the washer before any of you tried to sleep beneath them later on, and walked into the en-suite bathroom. She drew a nice bath, taking the extra minutes to add your favorite bath bomb into the warm water and light the few candles that remained around the edge of the tub. Bubbles were a must, you demanded them every time either of the redheads even suggested taking a bath, so while the water was still running Wanda added them to the tub as well. You didn’t like a hot bath, a fact that you had been sure to tell Natasha when she’d first tried to lower you into an aftercare session with one, so Wanda figured she had plenty of time to go back and collect you while the water cooled down some more. She could already see the bath bomb coloring the water pink as she left, and she knew both yours and her skin would smell like strawberries and vanilla once you crawled out and dried off. 

You had come back to yourself the faintest bit when Wanda re-entered the bedroom. You’d curled up onto your side, your head resting on one of your arms as you let your eyes remain closed. At the sound of her gentle footsteps, wide eyes still glassy shot open and searched for her. Unlike the state you’d been in when she left to run the bath, you were able to recognize her presence now and you made that very clear. “Mommy!” You cried, a fresh set of tears brimming your eyes as you reached a single hand out to her. Wanda kneeled down in front of the bed, gently taking your hand in hers and kissing it softly.

The hand that wasn’t occupied reach out to brush strands of fallen hair away from your face, and as expected, when she ran the pad of her thumb over your bottom lip, your tongue shot out to lick at it before soft lips claimed it entirely. Wanda smiled fondly, her other fingers gently stroking against your cheek. “Privet, moya milaya devochka.” 

You were still too far gone to comprehend the Russian sentence that you had become familiar with, but that didn’t bother Wanda who hadn’t been expecting a response in the first place. You were falling out of your head fairly quickly, and she worried that your humiliation was the leading factor in your unwillingness to let the fog linger fully. 

“Left.” You croaked pitifully around the soft weight of her thumb in your mouth, your wide eyes desperate for her to understand the message you were trying to convey and not let it happen again. 

“I didn’t leave.” Wanda shook her head firmly, placing another kiss to the top of your hand that curled around hers tightly, unwilling to let go for even a single second. You were always clingy when she got you in this state, and she adored every second of it. “Mommy ran us a bath. We’ve gotta get cleaned up.” She promised you, and at the mention of one of your favorite activities, your torso shot up from the bed and her hand fell away from your face. You wobbled in your disoriented and fuzzy state, leaning into her touch when she reached out to stabilize you. “Come on, sweetheart. There are bubbles waiting for you!” 

Wanda helped you into the bathroom, easing herself into the tub before she helped you over the edge and into her arms. You didn’t go for her fingers like she’d anticipated, merely wiggling your way down in her embrace until your head fell onto the swell of her breast. Not wanting to question you when you were so sensitive, Wanda merely dragged her hand across the inside of your thigh as you sat sideways in her lap, transfixed on the sharp edge of her jaw that clenched when you got too far into her head. She’d have to remember to thank Natasha for pushing to get the bigger tub when they’d remodeled the bathroom years ago, it was certainly coming in handy now. Your body was washed with tender touches, the loofa used a light blue color and saturated in Wanda’s own body wash. She didn’t know why you continued to buy your own, when the only one who ended up using it was her after you’d taken the last of hers. 

It was a comfortable silence that fell over the both of you as the bath water slowly became colder and colder, and with each minute that passed in combination with Wanda’s gentle stroking of your hip or your cheeks, you fell firmly beneath the blanket of fuzzy emptiness that you’d been fighting off before. You felt so loved and so cared for, there wasn’t a single thought in your mind beside her. The humiliation of your accident had waned away, replaced by only flourishing warmth. 

Eventually, your lips began to root around for something to suckle on. Wanda’s fingers hadn’t moved to your mouth quick enough, and your tongue sought out the first soft thing that it could find. A gasp fell from Wanda’s lips when you took her sensitive nipple into your mouth, a sharp sensation shooting through her body that was in no way sexual. She’d always had her speculations about this kind of contact, but now that she had it for herself to experience, she understood. She had all of your mind in her hands at this moment, but you had all of her body. It was a delicate balance that further emphasized how your relationship could only thrive if all parties were equal and respected. Wanda trailed a soft finger over the bridge of your nose, her own scrunching up in admiration. 

“Find something you like, little one?” She teased, but there was no bite behind her words as she gently adjusted your latch to be more comfortable for the both of you. The bath water was officially cold, no longer able to be passed off as warm, but Wanda would allow you to sit in it just this once. She was always such a stickler for crawling out of the tub when the water went cold, but even she didn’t want to leave the intimacy of this moment as your eyes fluttered closed and your tongue made gentle sweeps across her nipple. “You did so good for me. So so good. Mommy’s so proud of you. My good girl.” She whispered delicate praise into the otherwise quiet bathroom, her eyes appreciating how the dim candle light made your glassy eyes glow like a fire had been placed behind them. 

She could faintly hear the front door open downstairs and she smiled knowing that Natasha had finally made it home. It wasn’t often that the Russian went into the office alone, but today had worked out weirdly and Wanda wouldn’t trade it for anything. Natasha had noticed how quiet the house was upon entering, and she tried her best not to disturb the stillness that you and Wanda had created. She took the stairs one at a time, peeking into Wanda’s office when she noticed the door was oddly ajar. Wanda either had the door firmly closed or entirely open, it was never left in the half-opened state it was now. Two pairs of shorts and the puddle on the floor told her everything she needed to know about what had happened while she was away at work. Anticipating your blissed out headspace and Wanda’s full hands, Natasha cleaned the scene, still dressed in business slacks and an off-white satin blouse. The chair had been scrubbed and sanitized, and the floor had been given the same treatment in only a matter of minutes. There was no need to buy a new chair now, and memories of this afternoon would linger in the room anytime either one of you set your sight on it. 

Natasha carried yours and Wanda’s shorts back into the bedroom. She picked up the pile of clothes that had been left on the floor, adding them to the laundry basket they kept hidden away in the closet before her own clothes were thrown on top. She dressed quickly, able to hear the one-sided conversation that was happening on the other side of the wall. 

“Daddy’s home.” Wanda cooed sweetly to you, her eyes filled with gentle love and admiration that felt so full she wanted to cry. You barely heard her words, and if you did, you didn’t fully comprehend them, but she didn’t expect you to. “She’ll be so proud of how good you were for Mommy. The best little duckling.” 

Natasha had decided then to make her presence known, two big and cozy towels in her hands. The initial sight of you and Wanda together had shocked her, her eyes transfixed on where her wife’s nipple was in your mouth, but she didn’t make it a big deal. Lowering herself onto the tile floor beside the tub, placing the towels just out of what she deemed the splash zone, the Russian reached out gently to caress your still flush cheeks. 

“How did this happen?” Natasha questioned Wanda, keeping her voice soft so as to not disturb you when you looked so content and fulfilled. The scent of strawberry and vanilla clung to the air in the bathroom, enough for Natasha to know that one of your favorite bath bombs had been thrown into the tub. 

“She’s down deep.” Wanda merely hummed, leaning over the edge of the tub to lay her lips against Natasha’s. “It was the first thing she found when she decided she needed something in her mouth.” Wanda laughed softly, the vibrations jostling her breasts much to your displeasure. Your hand fell onto the swell of her breast, keeping it still as you suckled contently despite the near interruption. 

“I can’t say I blame her.” Natasha teasingly pinched at Wanda’s nipple, not missing the way the Sokovian’s eyes fluttered closed and she chased the sensation when it was pulled away. Wanda had sensitive nipples, it was a known fact that Natasha loved to abuse, but something about this moment with you just felt entirely pure and wholesome. “Let me be the bad guy and get her out. You’re freezing.” Natasha frowned when she noticed just how cold to the touch Wanda’s skin was. She grabbed at you instantly, noticing that the sections of your skin that had been submerged in the water were just as cold as Wanda’s. 

You whined in protest when you were pulled away from Wanda’s chest and wrapped up like a little bug in the towel that Natasha had brought into the bathroom for you. Natasha didn’t bat an eye at your pitiful whimpering, carrying out of the bathroom and toward the guest bedroom when she gathered the hint that the comforter needed to be washed before any of you laid beneath it that night. It was scary how in tune she and Wanda could be at times, but you weren’t fully present enough to comment on their freaky telepathy. 

Natasha got you dressed into a pair of summer pajamas that still occupied the guest room from when you’d first started spending the night. Your clothes occupied nearly every room at this point, but she wouldn’t have it any other way. She adored the little traces of your presence that popped up at random moments, which might be the reason why she no longer scolds you for leaving your shoes in every corner of the house despite the large collection at the front door. By the time you're beneath the blankets in the guest bed, Wanda’s coming into the room in a pair of pajama shorts, though she’s still void of a shirt. 

“Giving in so easily, moya lyubov’? And here I thought you were the strict one.” Natasha teased, knowing fully what Wanda had intended on when she purposefully left the matching top in the drawer where the shorts used to lay. 

“I introduced her to a lot today. I’m not going to try and get her to take my fingers when I know that’s not what she wants.” Wanda merely shrugged, allowing her soft heart to bleed into her words for the briefest minute before she was slipping back into the headspace you craved. “Come here, my little duckling. Let’s get you all comfy.” Wanda pulled your body into hers, guiding your lips down to her chest. Her nipple was sensitive, sore from the earlier abuse, but she didn’t mind the sting of pain that came when your lips wrapped firmly around her skin. “You did so good today, milaya. So good.” 

Natasha curled herself around Wanda, keeping you close between the both of them. It wasn’t long before your lips fell slack around Wanda’s nipple and your breathing evened out. Wanda and Natasha smiled down at you endearingly, deciding there was no harm in taking a little nap after the day that they'd had.

[marauroon]

Hellooo! Marauders are taking over my heart my body and my life as well so could I maybe request a fic with James (or poly!marauders whatever you like) with a reader who is avoidant of relationships so once they realize they are loved they try to run away but James wont let her go and patiently convinces her to give them a chance? Thank you so much!

S E L F - S A B O T A G E — POLY MARAUDERS!

poly!marauders x fem!reader | h/c | 4.0k | masterlist!!

the marauders had thrown their hearts at you like it was effortless. and you just couldn’t return the gesture.

cw— relationship avoidant reader, mild miscommunication, mini argument, reader gets anxious and overwhelmed

a/n— thanks for the request ml, this one may require a part two <3

When exactly did it start? All four of you could give a different answer.

Sirius wagers it was the first potions class of fifth year, where you’d been unceremoniously wedged in between him and James as a part of a stupid boy-girl seating plan to stop ‘distractions’.

It didn’t work evidently, and James had managed to talk your ear off almost every lesson since, a familiar glint in his eye that Sirius knew all too well.

Remus would say it was closer to the end of that same year, when they’d somehow managed to invade your table in the library to study for their OWLs and Sirius had managed to get distracted—and distract you—within ten minutes of sitting down, spending almost a whole hour talking at you before Remus had to step in to make sure you both got an ample amount of revision done.

James would probably argue it was the first time the three actually spoke to you, finalised in the way that Remus looked at you as you slid a healing balm across the desk for his increasingly scarred hands with only a mutter that they “looked like they hurt,”.

And you? Well…

You’re not exactly sure.

It was so gradual yet so sudden and now you’re walking down the hallways with three borderline guard dogs at your tail like they’ve collectively decided you were a part of their pack.

And you weren’t sure how you felt about it.

It was endearing to a point, a genuine, unconditional affection shared between the three boys and spread onto you with no request for yours in return, but you’d be lying if you said it didn’t feel almost suffocating.

You were almost constantly in the presence of at least one of the boys, languidly smothering you in unbridled affection like it was second nature to them.

Whether it was Remus slipping you notes for classes you weren’t paying attention in, Sirius insisting on carrying your bag down the hallways, or James sneaking compliments into every sentence he spoke to you, the casual fondness they showed you was never-ending.

And if you were being honest, it was beginning to be a bit too much.

“Here, love,” James passes you a pitcher over Sirius’ breakfast. “You’ll dry out your throat, we need that pretty voice in tact ready for the match later,”

You take the pitcher from him with a raised eyebrow, hoping your fluster isn’t too apparent in your tone. “the… match?”

“The Quidditch match doll,” Sirius takes it upon himself to pour your drink for you, taking the pitcher from your hands like you’ll shatter if he’s not careful enough. “We’re versing Slytherin, it’ll be a sight for sure,”

Oh.

Right.

“Damn right, I can’t wait to see the looks on their faces when we take the cup for the fifth year in a row,” James hits Sirius’ arm lightly in his enthusiasm, stealing a slice of toast from his plate. “You are coming right?” James blinks at you slowly, honey-brown eyes big and round, like he’s silently trying to hypnotise you into agreeing with him.

“I- yeah,” You give him a half-stunted nod, letting your words speak before you can make up your mind and ultimately pull out of it. “yeah…”

“Excellent,” James clasps his hands together with a satisfied nod. “I’ll dig out a spare jersey for you,”

“Who said she was wearing your name?” Sirius turns to him with a raised eyebrow, and it starts a lighthearted debate that you quickly tune out in favour of the dull ringing in your ears.

The way they were talking made everything sound so final, so… concrete. Like you’d just completely melded into their routine through no input of your own.

“You don’t have to,” There’s a soft nudge against your left side, joined by what’s almost a whisper from Remus. “I don’t go to all of them,”

He’s giving you an out. Or at least trying to. You know that if you suddenly pull out of wanting to go that James and Sirius’d be disappointed, even if they pretend that they’re not.

“It’s alright..” You shake your head with a small smile, attempting to reassure both Remus—and yourself—that you really do want to watch the boys play.

James wins his and Sirius’ debate apparently, and a few hours before the match is due to start he hands you a folded up Quidditch jersey with a smile etched onto his face.

“Here you are m’love, look forward to seeing you in it later,” He presses a kiss to the top of your head, winking as he pulls away. “Gotta run for some last minute practice, wish me luck,”

“Good luck…” your hands curl in around the jumper almost instinctually as you stand stationary watching James run out of the common room waving in your direction, and once he’s out of sight your eyes drop to the clothing in your arms.

You hold it up to let it unfold, signature red and gold stripes adorning the fabric and a large embroidered ‘POTTER’ covering the back where it’d meet your shoulder blades.

Well, James’ shoulder blades. It would probably cover most of your upper back.

You spend the next hour staring at it in your dorm room, left draped over the end of your bed as you internally fought with yourself over whether you should actually put it on.

It was taunting you the way the gold embroidery thread caught the overheard lighting, forcing your focus towards the surname like an ultimatum.

If you put on that jumper, you were committing yourself to whatever you’d been thrust into.

And the thought made you almost physically nauseous.

It was like the boys had handed you their hearts on a silver platter, expecting you to shield them inside your ribcage, nestled against your own until they stop beating.

Like they were giving themselves to you wholely, nothing left behind until it was piled up so high that you couldn’t dig yourself out of the iron hold they’d captured you in no matter how much you tried, slowly asphyxiating yourself under the ever constricting grasp of the cage they’d trapped you in until you turned blue.

It terrified you.

You didn’t go to the Quidditch game.

God knows if you did it would end in nothing less than tears, if not you literally collapsing from hyperventilating at the first sight of any of the three of them.

Instead, you burrowed yourself underneath your satin sheets to seek a dull solace, no comfort found in the way you curled in on yourself, but no growing anxiety either.

You knew you’d have to leave it eventually, face the three boys and force out an excuse whilst desperately hoping they didn’t see just how horrifically anxious they made you.

It was horrible really, they’d done nothing but extend their kindest hands to you, treat you like you painted the stars in the sky and gifted them the oxygen they breathed.

And here you were, dreading the thought of so much as glancing at their blissfully oblivious faces.

“Sweetheart,” Marlene enters the dorm almost cautiously as she edges the door open, still clad in her full quidditch gear, sweat glistening against her forehead. “The boys are outside for you,”

“I’m not here,” You muffle your words into your duvet as you pull it up and over your head, and you can’t faintly hear Marlene sigh as she treads over and pulls you from your cocoon of self pity through dragging the quilt out of your hands.

She raises her eyebrow down at you questioning it, but you can see the concern swirling in her irises.

“Just tell them I’m asleep?” You furrow your eyebrows in silent pleading, echoed through your words as you exhale heavily. “Please?”

Shes clearly not very happy with your request, but she bites her tongue and gives you a small nod anyway, brushing stray hairs from your forehead with a sigh. “Whatever this is about, you should talk to them,”

“Yes mum,” You roll your eyes with a feigned sigh of indignation, pulling the duvet back up underneath your chin.

As she turns to leave, expression a mix of exasperation and amusement, you catch the jersey draped against your bed-post in the corner of your eye.

“Marls,” You point to it almost pathetically. “I really don’t want to face them right now,”

She practically snatches the jumper from the end of your bed with an almost scolding expression, and you flash her a guilty but grateful smile.

“I love you,”

“My love for you is dwindling,” She throws the jumper over her arm with an over-dramatised exhale, but she shoots you a flying kiss across the room nonetheless, and it leaves you with a small smile as the door clicks shut.

Although it doesn’t last very long.

You’d given her the jumper to return for you because you didn’t even want to consider what James’ face would look like when he got it back.

But of course your mind pictured it anyway.

The way his hazel eyes would pool first in disappointment before slowly turning to worry, a small, almost imperceptible frown pulling at the corners of his lips and his eyebrows furrowed just enough that it caused a line to form above the bridge of his nose.

You honestly didn’t know if you seeing it in real life or the picture your brain had unceremoniously forced onto you was worse, but what you did know was that you could not face him now.

The minute that boy saw you—any of them really—you knew that the impending conversation that followed was going to be one you didn’t want to have.

You jinxed yourself pretty hard with that prediction.

You’d managed to avoid the three at breakfast the next morning to no credit of your own, slept in so late after running your mind into the ground the night before you’d basically missed the whole thing, but you didn’t even make it down the hallway towards your first lesson before a pair of running feet crescendo’d in your direction.

“Hey—”

Shit.

“Sirius, morning,” You stop dead in the middle of the hallway, most definitely to the begrudgement of the rest of the students trying to get to class; And whilst you regret it almost immediately, Sirius doesn’t have a care in the world for diverting the foot traffic, concern written in the way his eyebrows knit together as his attention stays devoted to you.

“Are you okay? You didn’t make it to the match yesterday, we were worried about you,” His tone conveys less disappointment that you didn’t go and more genuine concern that something might’ve happened or gone wrong.

“Yeah, sorry,” You reply half awkwardly, fiddling absentmindedly with the cuffs of your sleeves. “I’m alright though,” You echo the end of your sentence with a nod, lips pressed together in a line, a mimicry of a smile.

“You’re sure?” He reaches out his hand to press the back of it against your forehead. “Because if you’re ill Moony’s got a bunch of stuff from Madame Pomfrey, I’m sure something’ll—”

“I’m fine, Sirius,” You don’t let him finish his sentence before you’re gently pulling his hand away from your face and back down to his side. “You really don’t have to worry, I just fell asleep,”

“Alright,” He most definitely picks up on the traces of defensiveness in your tone as he takes a step backwards to give you a little more personal space, and you’d have half the mind to feel guilty if you weren’t so constantly overwhelmed by him and the others.

“I’ll uh,” He presses his lips together half-awkwardly. “Let you get to class then,”

“Don’t you have potions?” It’s genuine curiosity, edged with a small amount of concern that Sirius’ll be late for his own class now that he’s followed you half way to yours. On the opposite side of the castle.

“Yeah, but I wanted to make sure you were okay first,” Sirius gives you a small smile, though it doesn't quite reach his eyes. “Let me walk you?”

You shake your head slowly, gently pushing on his shoulder. “Go to your own class, Sirius,”

He lingers for a moment before turning to head back in the direction he came from, leaving you with a mix of relief and lingering guilt.

__

Your day is largely uneventful until lunch, the smell of parchment still lingering in your nose as you wander out towards the courtyard instead of joining your friends in the great hall.

You knew they’d be there. Of course they’d be there.

And after this morning with Sirius, which he’d definitely told the other two about, you were finding yourself wanting to be in their presence even less.

So you take your lunch to the courtyard instead, settling on a bench farthest from the entrance to avoid any potential encounter. The peace is short-lived, however, as you hear the unmistakable sound of footsteps approaching.

“Thought you might be out here,” James' voice is gentle, his expression a mix of concern and relief as he takes a seat next to you.

You tense up, trying to muster a smile but failing. “Hey, James.”

“Hey,” he echoes, and you can feel the weight of his gaze on you. “You missed breakfast this morning.���

“Yeah, I—“ You search for an excuse, but nothing comes to mind. “I wasn't really hungry.”

James nods slowly, as if he's trying to decode the underlying meaning behind your words. “Is everything alright? You seemed a bit off yesterday.”

You take a deep breath, feeling the anxiety bubble up in your chest. “I'm fine, really. Just needed some time to myself.”

“Time to yourself?” James repeats, his tone soft but probing. “Did something happen? Are you okay?”

You wanted to curse James Potter sometimes.

How could he be so confident in himself that he could throw his heart at you with no fear of it shattering in your palms?

How could he be so sweet yet so painfully ignorant?

“If this is about you missing the quidditch match yesterday, Sirius and I aren’t—”

“It’s not about the quidditch match James,” You cut him off with a sigh. “Or— It is, but it’s not just about that—”

You stand to release yourself from James’ proximity.

“James, it's everything.” you finally admit, unable to hold back any longer. “I cant so much as breathe without one of you attached to my hip and I can’t do it anymore—”

James' face falls, the concern in his eyes deepening. “We're just trying to show you we care, but if it's too much, we can give you space.”

“It's not just space,” you say, your voice trembling. “It's... even thinking about you three is suffocating me...”

James's face contorts in confusion and a touch of hurt, but he quickly masks it with a forced understanding. "I... didn't realize it was that bad," he says quietly, his usual confident demeanor faltering for the first time in your memory.

You swallow hard, guilt gnawing at your insides, but you can’t take back what you’ve said. You don’t want to. It’s been building inside you for too long—the overwhelming presence of James, Sirius, and Remus in your life. They were everywhere, all the time, and while their company had almost become a comfort, it quickly spiralled into a cage.

“I’m sorry, James. I know you all mean well, but it’s just… too much,” you confess, your voice barely above a whisper.

He nods, though the motion seems more for his benefit than yours, as if he’s trying to force himself to understand. “I get it,” he says, though you can tell he really doesn’t. “I guess I never thought about how it might feel from your side. We just… we wanted to make sure you really felt like one of us,”

The way he says "one of us" stings, a reminder of how you were a part of their tight-knit group—no, how they had made you a part of it, pulling you in whether you liked it or not.

But that was the problem, wasn’t it? You hadn’t really been given a choice. You had been absorbed into their world, expected to fit perfectly into the space they had carved out for you, without ever considering whether you wanted to be there in the first place.

“I know you didn’t mean any harm,” you say, trying to soften the blow. “But I need to figure out how I feel without… without you all hovering over me all the time.”

James winces at that, and you can see the pain in his eyes. “We never meant to make you feel like that,” he says, his voice thick with emotion. “I thought… We— thought, you… We were trying to prove how much we care…”

The tears you’ve been holding back threaten to spill over, but you blink them away. “I don’t need you to prove anything, James. I need to breathe.”

He looks down at his hands, clasped tightly together in his lap. “If that’s what you need, then we’ll give it to you,” he says finally, though his voice is tinged with reluctance. “We can give you space, we can— leave you alone if that’s what you need. We can wait until you’re ready.”

“What if I’m never ready?”

James doesn’t really know how to respond to that.

“I— Why wouldn’t you ever be ready..?”

“I don’t know if I can do this, James,” It hurts, coming out of your mouth, echoing back into your ears. But it’s true.

“I— I know being with three people at once can be overwhelming but—”

“It’s not that James,” You shake your head with an almost imperceptible sigh. “I don’t think I’d even be able to date one of you without being overwhelmed,”

James’s eyes widen in surprise, his expression shifting from hurt to confusion. “Are you saying... you don’t want to be with any of us?”

The question hangs in the air, heavy with the weight of unspoken fears and regrets. You glance away, struggling to find the right words to convey the complexity of your feelings.

“It’s not that I don’t want to be with you,” you say slowly, trying to articulate the intricate emotions swirling inside you. “But I can’t… give myself to you, I can’t— hand you three my heart on a silver platter like you did to me. I just can’t.”

James's expression shifts from confusion to a mixture of frustration and sadness. He clearly hadn’t expected this level of honesty.

“I get that you’re overwhelmed,” he says, his voice quiet but determined. “But can you give us a chance to show you that we can handle it? That we can adjust and give you what you need without pushing too hard?”

You meet his gaze, seeing the earnestness and vulnerability in his eyes. It’s clear he’s invested in making this work, not just for himself but for all three of them. You can see him struggling to reconcile his own desires with your need for space and clarity.

“It’s not just about trying, James,” you reply, feeling the weight of your words. “It’s about whether or not I’m ready to be a part of this—whatever this is. And right now, I don’t even know what I want, let alone if I can handle being part of something with all three of you.”

James nods, absorbing your words. “I understand that you need time. But maybe instead of pushing you away entirely, we could find a middle ground. We could— take things slower, give you room to breathe while still being here for you in a less overwhelming way. If you don’t want us all together then… maybe it’s just one of us you’d be open to starting with? Even if it’s just as friends—”

Your heart softens a bit at his suggestion. The idea of easing into something less intense seems more manageable, though it still doesn’t completely resolve your concerns.

“You can get to know us properly— as people, and let us show you why we care about you.” There’s a hint of desperation in his tone, one that’s mirrored in his irises, swirling in his gaze amidst the sunlight reflecting off of his pupils. “Just… give us a chance,”

You take in James’s earnest plea, feeling the weight of his words and the sincerity in his eyes. The desperation and hope in his gaze pull at something within you, a flicker of longing for a connection that feels genuine and real, even amidst the confusion and overwhelming anxiety.

“I... I can try,” you say slowly, the words feeling both heavy and hopeful as they leave your lips. “I can try to get to know you better, as individuals, and see where it goes. But I need you to understand that this isn’t going to be easy, and it might take longer than any of us expect.”

James’s face lights up with a mixture of relief and gratitude. “That’s all I’m asking for,” he says, a small but genuine smile forming on his lips. “We’ll take it slow, no pressure. Just... let us show you that we can be what you need, one step at a time.”

You nod, feeling a tentative sense of hope as you look at him. “Alright. We’ll start with that. But if at any point it becomes too much, I need you to promise me that you’ll respect that.”

James’s smile widens, his eyes reflecting a mix of joy and determination. “I promise. We’ll be patient and understanding. And if you need space, we’ll give it to you. Just... let us try and convince you...”

There’s a moment of silence between you, the tension easing slightly as you both come to a mutual understanding. The path forward is still uncertain, but the willingness to try and the promise of patience create a small but significant shift in the dynamic between you.

You give him a soft nod. “Thank you, James,” you breathe out shortly, feeling a weight lifted off your shoulders.

James gives you a warm, encouraging nod. “Anytime. We care about you, and we want you to be happy. Just remember, we’re here for you.”

And so, the next chapter of your ‘relationship’ began. Starting in a place that preceded even the beginning.

[hellfireloserclub]

For @kaspurrcat . Happy seasonal whatever it is you celebrate at this time of year ! Hope you enjoy your @steddieexchange fic !

Read it on ao3 here

Eddie didn't have a soulmate. He was almost certain of it.

He was almost twenty-two, most soulmates met or crossed paths way before they turned twenty-one.

If he had a soulmate, wouldn't they have shown up by now?

He was pretty sure your soulmate was supposed to show themselves in a near death situation? At this point he was pretty well versed in that department.

He had seen the light. The pearly gates had been calling. He had sacrificed himself for the greater good and all that bullshit, and if you were to believe Wayne, that was a one-way ticket to nirvana.

But the big guy upstairs had kicked him back to the mortal realm with little to no ceremony. He had followed the voices, like a good boy. You know the way they had preached each Sunday at church when he was knee high to a grasshopper. But instead of fluffy clouds and dudes playing harps, the voices had led him back to the blood red skies of the Upside Down.

Maybe he hadn't gotten a free pass after all.

Waking up in Steve Harrington's arms once was an anomaly, his stupidly honest big brown eyes pleading for Eddie to be alright. It wasn’t the worst experience in the world, at least someone other than Dustin had been there to put his insides back in the right place.

The second time Eddie came back from the dead under Steve Harrington's capable hands, it was just getting weird.

Harrington was like a cockroach; you couldn't kill him, but did he have to always be there when Eddie was on the brink of death?

The pair of them really needed to stop jumping head first into lovers lake, it never ended well for either of them. It was getting to where he was pretty sure his near-death experiences were more near Steve experiences these days.

Now if you were to believe the textbooks and the mushy romance novels… the love of Eddie's life should have been the one to bring him back from the brink.

Not Steve ‘king of the hair’ Harrington.

So in Eddie's defense, he was pretty sure that his soulmate just didn't exist.

She would have turned up by now right? Some universal bond tying him to the earthly realm.

He would have some sort of mark, something that tied them together, but he didn't.

All he had was scars.

Scars, nightmares, and a Knight in denim armor in the form of Steve Harrington. Someone he now got to count as one of his closest friends.

So when anyone asked him about it -why he still hasn't found his other half- he told them it didn't matter. Because it really didn't. The world was a big place, there was every chance your soulmate didn't even live in the same town, city, state… hell they might not even live on the same continent.

So it didn't matter. Eddie didn't have a soulmate. Eddie didn't care.

Only he did.

Ever since he came back from the dead the second time, (He really hoped he wouldn't have to make it a third time and that this time Vecna really stayed dead) Eddie had become obsessed with the concept of soulmates. Fascinated by the way the universe decided who was the other half of your soul and how that bond manifested. He had notebook after notebook on the subject. Read every book he could get his hands on copying paragraph after paragraph into his swooping scrawl.

He observed the people in his life like they were a nature documentary, then when his brain had processed the information he recorded it in his notes.

If he had been this thorough in high school, he might have graduated first time around.

He watched as Hopper and Joyce re-connected a soul bond that had formed back when they were teens.

Joyce would regale them whenever she got a drink in her hand, that something had pulled her to keep looking for Hopper when he disappeared. Not that same drive that had made everyone think she was crazy when Will disappeared, it was something else. It was the feeling of being tugged in a direction but not knowing where to go. A buzz in her mind that told her that Hop wasn't dead. It was the same feeling she had back when they Upside Down had come knocking the first time, but this time it was tenfold.

(Eddie wished he had someone who would always keep looking for him, it would be nice not to feel lost )

Lucas had instinctively known what Max had needed all the way through her time in the hospital, even when she was three floors above them and deep in a coma.

In her time of healing, he formed the echoes of her wounds and ever since any minor cut or blemish showed on the others skin when they hurt themselves.

Max learning to skate again had ended up with Lucas looking like he had fallen out of a tree. But he wore his bruises and scrapes with pride and they faded a lot faster than the ones that the car park had created outside of Maldives.

(The only wounds that showed on his skin these days were paper cuts from all his notebooks and the occasional burn to the tip of his finger. His mind wandered when he smoked and he must burn them down to the filter more often than he noticed. )

Nancy and Jonathan had manufactured soul marks, twin cuts on their palms that had been their own doing, a bond made rather than given, born through trauma and blood. Since they had reunited that bond had grown stronger.

It must have sucked to be Harrington, Eddie had been routing for him. As far as Eddie could see Steve was head over heels for Nancy, at least he had been back then.

But Jon and Nancy’s bond is forged in blood. The strongest of the soul bonds, made from sacrifice. Sure Steve had thrown himself in front of the jaws of death a million times, but not in the same way as Nancy and Jon had that first time.

(Eddie thought about it every time he looked at the scar on his arm from when he and Steve had cut themselves to lure the Demodogs away from the hospital and towards lovers lake. He still can’t believe his stupid plan worked. He had been in no fit state to be trying to run for his life again, but had been back on his feet enough to lure the drooling monsters away from Max’s door. But it had worked, and it had worked well. Right until something pulled him and Steve to the bottom of the lake again, but Eddie's plans rarely had an exit strategy, getting out was an afterthought.)

Eddie had wondered why the trauma that Robin and Steve went through hadn’t marked them. Normally five drinks deep and high as a kite he would ask them, the weird little third wheel that he was.

But whenever Eddie brought it up Steve would go quiet, and Robin would tell Eddie that when you only had one brain between you both, sharing a soul wouldn’t be the best idea.

Steve would get fidgety and rub absentmindedly at his neck, then mutter about soulmates being ridiculous, anyway. He rubbed that scar a lot, whenever he was nervous, whenever he was deep in thought.

Eddie wondered if it tingled and itched the way his own did, late at night when he was lying alone and pining for something he didn't seem to have.

Maybe notorious ladies’ man Harrington had the same problem as Eddie?

It wasn't unheard of to lose a soulmate, and Hawkins had a high body count.

Wayne had never met the other half of his soul, that little tug of fate had never come calling and Wayne was fine, Wayne was happy. At least that's what Eddie thought, it was sometimes hard to read his old man's expression and because he was a man of few words; it wasn't like they were ever going to go all deep and meaningful over it.

But just this once Eddie felt like he would like to be normal. He was getting kind of sick and tired of being the anomaly. He could deal with being the freak, but on his terms. When it came to this, to the matter of his very soul, it would be nice to be a little sheepee instead of the big bad wolf.

*************

Eddie flexed his arm in the breakroom mirror, his new ink had healed nicely.

Gareth had suggested a trip into the big city when he was back from college for Thanksgiving, and who was Eddie to deny one of his oldest friends anything?

It was an act of split second decision to swing into the tattoo parlor. Garath wanted, and Eddie was weak willed and easily led.

The guy had done a good job; he left with his bats touched up and looking a lot less like they had been chewed up by the demonic version of their best selves. The stick and poke version was long gone, replaced by the forking tails of the beasts that had given him the gnarly flesh wounds he was now trying to make a distant memory.

It was nice to look in the mirror and not instantly be reminded of skin grafts and trauma, to see bits of himself rising to the surface.

Yeah maybe the bats had been a bit on the nose, but he had read enough Batman comics to learn to embrace the thing that scared him.

It was helping to hold on to at least one bit of his own identity. He was not enjoying being part of the corporate grind, even if that corporate grind was lugging boxes around and stacking shelves in Family Video alongside Steve. Battle vest traded in for the forest green monstrosity that did nothing for his complexion.

The only thing it had going for it was the fact that he could wear whatever the hell he liked under the thing as long as he toned it down when head office showed up.

After all, he was friends with the boss.

Life was serene when Steve was the boss, especially when he was willing to rotate the staff around Hellfire, important Party business and Eddie’s inability to function on anything that looked or acted like a schedule.

Right now the man in question was watching him from the door, arms crossed in irritation as he tapped his foot in agitation.

“You look hot Munson, Sexiest thing I’ve ever seen in a work vest, now can we please, get a move on.” Steve bitched as he checked the time on his watch again.

“Buckley isn’t back for at least another hour and a half, what's the rush sweetheart?” Eddie said over his shoulder as he pulled his sweater back down over his hands and threw his vest in the staff's corner room where it would have to rot till his next shift.

“We have to pick up the tree from Hoppers before we go get her and I wanted to catch my parents before they fly out to my Gran’s for the holidays-”

“They leaving you here again?” Eddie asked sceptically, as he pulled on his jacket, not that he didn’t like the Harrington's; they had been nothing but nice to him. He just wished that once in a while they would put Steve before whatever flight of fancy his mother took, or the business trips his dad couldn’t be trusted to take alone.

“I told them I didn’t want to go, I haven’t seen Robin in over a month, and I have work. Pair that with the fact that I really can’t be bothered with my Gran lecturing me on how disappointed she is in me I took the get out of jail free card . This way I get to see your cheerful face throughout this festive season.” Steve said, patting Eddie on both cheeks.

Steve had a way of getting under Eddie's skin like nobody else, if anyone else tried to baby him like this he would bite them. Verbally or physically depending on who it was, although he did try to rein in his strangeness these days, at least in public, but not around Steve, he snapped after Steve's fingers as he pulled them away.

“Yeah, but now… I get to feel guilty about the fact you're rocking around that great big house of yours on your own on the big day, baby… pretty thing like you shouldn’t be alone on Christmas.” Eddie said as he followed Steve towards the door. Getting as close as he dares to really irritate the man. It was too early to close the store, they both knew that, but who was going to tell them off? Steve?

Trying to irritate him didn’t work, as soon as they were at the door Steve halted and Eddie plowed right into his back, causing the other man to laugh and reach out and steady him.

“Careful.” Steve said as he reached around him to flip the sign, pulled his packet of Malbrough out of his pocket and gently pushed Eddie out the door.

It was a well-practiced thing now, the first smoke at the end of the shift. If they were picking up Robin soon, it might be the last one Steve had for a while. Robin’s wrath at them smoking around her wasn’t worth the nicotine fix.

Eddie watched as the other man went through his routine, lighting two cigarettes in his own mouth then passing one to Eddie, he let Steve place it between his lips no questions asked.

Steve seemed to mill something over in his mind as he took his first deep huff of smoke.

“I’m not going to be alone, I’ll be at Henderson’s, just like you no doubt, because I’m sure as hell that Uncle Wayne refused to take the day off.”

“Stubborn as a mule, and just as predictable.” Eddie grumbled.

“Uncle Wayne or you?” Steve asked, blowing small smoke circles in the air. The sight momentarily hypnotized Eddie, unable to take his eyes away from the way Steve twisted his tongue to get the shapes right.

“You don’t have to call him Uncle, we've been through this.” Eddie groused as he ashed his own cigarette, before opening his side of the truck and climbing behind the driver's seat.

“Yeah I know, but he won’t let me call him Sir and he keeps telling me if I call him Mr. Munson, I’m not allowed in the apartment.” Steve lamented as they drove out of the car park and turned towards the forest. “I know for a fact that Mama Claudia would never leave you and Wayne out when she invited all the strays around for lunch, because she’s incapable of not looking after a lost cause.”

“Does this mean I have to get you a gift?” Eddie asked as they idled at a red light, the snow falling slowly outside adding an element of whimsy to the traitorous conditions. He took his last draw of his smoke and stubbed it out in his ashtray, eyes half on the road, half on his closest friend in the passenger seat. He looked good today, all ruddy cheeked and wind swept, even if his signature hair hid underneath a black wool hat that he had stolen from Eddie last time he was at the apartment.

“You mean you haven’t already?” Steve pouted from the passenger seat, angel and bastard all rolled into one being. “I thought I was a kept man?”

“Whores will have their trinkets.” Eddie lamented and Steve punched him in the arm.

“Strong words when you're the only one who’s had a date in months.” Steve grumbled waving his cigarette around in Eddie’s direction. It was almost burned to the filter, and Eddie wondered if Steve was determined to enjoy every bit before Robin got here, or if he had just forgotten he was smoking it like usual.

“Failed date’s Harrington. Failed dates. I’m an accused murderer, at least I have an excuse for striking out. What’s your excuse?” God the light was taking forever to change, Eddie rubbed his hand along the raised bumps of his steering wheel, the action burning friction to the tips of his fingers, the warmth welcomed against the bitterness of the snow.

“I’m just not interested? I dunno, I just…” Steve trailed off, rubbing absentmindedly at his right arm. “Maybe I’m just caught up on something I can’t have, keep sabotaging myself before I’ve even gotten them out the front door.”

“You got your eye on someone?” Eddie asked. Steve had mentioned no one recently, he hadn’t even really tried to hit on any of the women that clearly were flirting with him when they came into the store.

“Is it someone I know?”

“He is yeah.” Steve said quietly, so quiet Eddie was sure he wasn’t supposed to hear it.

Steve made a fuss of stubbing out his cigarette, raising his hand to his mouth where he had ignited the filter and it had caught his skin. It was quick and Eddie almost missed it but Steve looked over to him as Eddie inhaled quickly, a warmth spreading through him he couldn’t quite put a finger on, even if that was where it had started.

“He?” he asked carefully, aware that how he handled this was going to make or break this strange friendship that both he and Steve had cultivated. He didn’t want Steve to think he was about to punch him in the face.

“He.” Steve said again, rubbing at his arm with a little more persistence. “But you know, small town Indiana. So the chance of him liking me back? It’s like the chances of something coming from Mars…so what? A million to one? So like…” He waved his hand about weakly. This wasn’t the time to point out that Steve had definitely been spending too much time with him and Dustin.

“So is he like… You know.. Your soulmate?” Eddie asked, wishing the light would hurry and change color so he could make himself concentrate on the road.

“I had a feeling he was. But it was sort of confirmed the other week. But who knows, maybe I’m just clutching at straws. I don’t think he knows, or if he does, he's said nothing.” Steve said, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. “Maybe he knows and just doesn't care, that’s always an option.”

That made something twist in Eddie’s stomach, he had been so sure that Steve, like himself, was destined not to find his soulmate. But knowing that he had found him, and they didn't want him back?

It was making Eddie’s insides knot with jealousy and rage and he didn’t like the taste of it on his tongue.

“Maybe he’s scared? Or maybe he’s just an idiot, or he just hasn’t released? I mean Maybe he’s not looking for a dude? Although I dunno, how anyone could spend five minutes with you and not love you Stevie. You just need to turn on that Harrington charm right?” Eddie asked as the lights finally changed color and he could drag his eyes away from the worried expression that was plastered on Steve’s face now.

“I've tried, he's oblivious.” Steve said weakly, he sounded so defeated it was making Eddie’s heart ache.

This was why Eddie had given up, he never wanted to sound that sad over something that was outside of his own control.

He chanced a glance in Steve’s direction; he was chewing on his finger now, red from the burn and now the irritation of Steve’s tongue and lips.

“It doesn’t bother you… that I’m…that I like…”

“That, you like dicks?” Eddie asked, almost unable to keep the nervous laughter out of his voice. He didn’t have a problem with it, it had just thrown him, he hadn’t expected it from ladies’ man Steve.

“Dunno never tried it. I was gonna say dudes, but you just gotta make it weird right?” Steve said with a depreciated laugh. Eddie couldn’t let that slide. Steve was a saint, he didn’t get to belittle himself, not on Eddie’s watch.

“King of the freaks, remember? It’s my job to be weird, it happens by default. Anyway, who am I to ever stop anyone from being the best version of themself? Plus, if you’re gay that means more women for me right?” Eddie said, focusing on trying to find the turnoff to Hoppers through the now dense falling snow.

“Not gay.” Steve said as he tapped him on the arm and pointed to the turn in the road that Eddie had almost missed.

“You just told me your soulmate is a dude and that you like dicks…. Sounds pretty gay to me Stevie.” Eddie reasoned as carefully turned onto the wood-lined drive to the Hoppers- Byers cabin.

“You know you can like both women and men right?” Steve asked quietly as he zipped his coat tighter at the sight of Hopper and Jane waiting for them with a pre-cut tree. “There’s a word for it, but we all know how bad I am with words. Robin will be able to tell you later, but yeah.. Whatever that is? That's me, so, I just…” Steve seemed to sink into himself more lost in the many folds of his oversized jacket.

Eddie said nothing as he parked up. Processing what Steve had just told him? Both? That creature that lived in him paced, trying to process this new knowledge. Eddie tried to soothe it, this wasn’t the time, he could look at that new information later when Steve wasn’t spilling his heart out to him in a snowstorm.

They were both about to get out when he reached over and grabbed Steve’s arm, warmth running through him when Steve didn’t pull away.

“Thankyou for telling me, you didn’t have to-”

“-But I wanted to.” Steve said with a weak smile as he stepped out into the building storm.

*********

Robin and Steve had fallen straight into that silent communication that Eddie still didn't get but reluctantly admitted was kind of cute in a twisted way.

He preferred no words better than the hushed conversations the two of them were having in the back seat, keeping voices low so the sound of the truck kept their secrets.

After their earlier conversation, he and Steve hadn’t really circled back around to the earth shattering revelation that Steve’s soulmate was a guy.

It felt like with this new knowledge about Steve, Eddie’s world view was changing.

To be fair, his world view had changed a lot since 86, that ladies’ man Steve also liked guys was really pretty far down on the list of life shattering revelations.

Yet Eddie was confused why the thought of it was giving him palpitations. The idea was sitting heavily in his chest and in his head and it was just as well he had to keep his eyes on the road because he knew if he didn’t he was likely to dwell on his new factoid and spiral down a rabbit hole he wasn’t sure he would get out of soon.

Every so often Eddie would glance at the two people in the back seat, covertly of course, the wonder of the rear-view mirror.

Steve was showing Robin something, his body twisted so that Eddie couldn’t make out what it was. He couldn't make out what they were saying with a quirk of the eyebrow and a knowing glance, no matter how good he had gotten at reading the expressions of the two weirdos behind him.

Was Steve telling Robin the thing that had confirmed to Steve that the person he thought was his soulmate was actually his soulmate?

Eddie turned the music up to give the two of them more privacy.

Steve would share his revelation with him when he was ready. If he was ever ready to.

As he turned towards Loch Nora, Eddie felt the mood change in the car.

That ache was back, it sat heavy in his chest, a longing for something he couldn’t have.

He couldn't work out why it snuck up on him like this, more and more when he least expected it.

When he glanced in the mirror again Steve was watching him. Robin curled into his side as she talked animatedly.

It was easy to see why people thought the two of them were a couple, joined at the hip, mirrors of each other in almost every way, now that Steve liked guys, that just added to the reflection.

“I heard dingus told you his good news?” Robin asked, leaning forward and resting herself between the two front chairs. It would annoy Eddie that one of them hadn’t just rode up front with him. But he knew the two of them had to fuze together as soon as possible when reunited, and it really wouldn’t have been safe for both of them to squash themselves into the front seat, at least not with the snow coming down like it was now.

“The whole, doubling his chances of absolutely foul balling his relationships?” Eddie asked as they passed the now entering Hawkins sign. “Yeah, he mentioned it.”

“And?”

“And what? I don’t have an issue with it if that’s what you're asking?”

“So you are cool with him being Bisexual-”

“That’s it Bisexual! How the hell did I not remember that?” Steve complained from the back seat.

“Doesn’t bother me what or who he sticks his dick in, or you know… the other way around.” Eddie had to really concentrate not to swerve the car as Robin smacked him in the arm. HARD.

In the back seat Steve yelped, Eddie figured Robin must have kicked him or something, but he couldn’t see past Robin in his rear-view mirror.

“Why are you both so revolting? Like seriously, what did I do to be stuck with the pair of you?”

“You love us both Bucks, don’t be giving us that.” Eddie reprimanded.

“God, you are like a bonded pair now. How am I supposed to prosper in this kind of environment?” Robin grumbled, throwing herself back into the back seat with a huff. “Why has the universe cursed me with two absolute numbskulls as best friends?”

“Hey! Less of the numbskulls.” Steve complained. “My dumbness is all the concussions. I’m sure you have plenty of opportunities to prosper at all the wild parties you go to. Not my fault you left me to spread your wild oats or whatever it is you get up to in that fancy school of yours.”

“You would know what I get up to if you ever ventured further than Indianapolis.” Robin sniped back. “But you two seem to have made roots here. When was the last time the two of you went over three days without seeing each other?”

“We work together Robs, I don't think that's fair…” Steve started arguing, but Eddie had turned his attention back to the road, the snow was coming down harder now, it gave him time to think about Robin's question.

When was the last time the two of them had spent more than three days apart?

Maybe when Wayne and Eddie had gone on that fishing trip?

Sometimes Eddie spent more time with Steve than he did with Wayne, and they still lived together.

Often when Steve's parents were away, Eddie would crash at Steve’s house, wherever they landed was where they slept. He had shared a bed with Steve Harrington more times than any other living being.

Hu? Now he thought about it, maybe he really was permanently in Steve’s space. He really had fallen into the gap that Robin had left behind that easily. Her old job, her place at Steve's side, her place in Steve's bed.

Eddie had never been like that with any of his other friends as far as he could remember. Maybe when he was little and Wayne had let him sleep over at Jeff's, but they had slept top to tail.

But the first time Steve had grunted at him to ‘just stay put man,’ when he had moved to get up and move himself to the guest room, Eddie hadn’t fought it, he had just settled back in and let Steve get comfortable against his side again.

Steve needed it. Eddie knew he wasn't sleeping well again. And after that first time it had just been a thing that happened. He hadn't questioned it .

Maybe Robin had a point.

Steve had become such an integral part of Eddie’s routine and he hadn’t even noticed it happening.

That led to the question: who was the mysterious man who had imprinted on Steve and left his mark? Because Eddie would have to be aware of them right? If they were always together it wasn’t like a stranger had walked in and whisked him off his feet.

The mysterious man of Steve's dreams itched like an irritation that Eddie couldn't quite reach, and when he looked in the rearview again, it didn’t surprise him to see Steve staring back at him.

**************

“Season’s greetings and salutations.” Eddie said as he darted into the kitchen to get the dustpan and brush to pick up the pine leaves trailing from the front door to the corner next to the fire.

Mr. Harrington looked every bit his son when he shook his head and the small smile creeped upon his face, it was a testament to how often Eddie was in the house that the older man hadn’t even questioned his presence in his humble abode.

Not that you could call the Harrington home humble, it was every bit the show home that Steve’s mom had intended it to be. Mrs. Harrington would have a conniption if she ever visited Wayne’s place, the only interior design magazine that had ever entered the place was being used to prop up the corner of the wonky coffee table.

Ironically, it was the one that featured Mrs. Harrington on page three with her newest grand design.

Perks of being married to an editor, Eddie supposed. But hey, if it stopped him losing his cereal to the floor in the morning it had its uses.

“I thought you were both on the close tonight?” Mr. Harrington asked as Eddie grabbed the cleaning things.

“We were.” He started, and the rest came out in a rush as he rummaged through the cupboard for cleaning stuff, but Richard Harrington seemed to keep up. “But you're leaving tonight and Steve wanted to see you before you left and we had to pick up Robin from the bus station, ‘cause her parents aren't back until ten. There was no way I was letting Steve try to drive the Beemer in this. And then I was roped into getting the tree from Hoppers with him, because that couldn’t have waited till tomorrow, and him and Robin have left a trail of destruction in their wake,” Eddie waved the brush around to show his intentions and the reason for his rush of words, “So you know, I’m left to tidy up that mess… and that’s why, if anyone from head office calls, the snow took the power out.”

Richard Harrington had a pleasant laugh, sweet like honey, another thing he shared with his son. That Eddie had noticed that made the twisting in his chest churn again.

He really needed to look at that a bit more. It couldn't be good.

“I take it that if I walk into my lounge I'm going to be bombarded with Christmas cheer?” He asked, the grin getting bigger.

“Alas, just a naked tree, apparently your grandchildren need to be present to festoon its mighty branches with glitter and gold.” Eddie said sagely. “And that I believe is my punishment tomorrow as I think I’ve displeased his lordship.”

“Ah, just as well Lenore stocked the candy and soda up for the festivities.” Richard said sagely as he sipped his coffee. Eddie knew what was coming next, it was Richard Harrington’s current new obsession. “Have you thought about writing that book yet?”

“Ah, Mr. H, you know I can't spell for shit…”

“And I keep telling you that's what one of my editors is for. Tell me you will at least think about it again over Christmas?” Richard asked, and oh great. There was that pleading look Steve used to get Eddie to do a lot of the heavy lifting. It wasn't as effective when it was blue eyes doing the requesting, it was easier to say no to Richard.

“I'll think about it.” Eddie said as the sound of Mrs. Harrington descending the stairs caused Richard to jump to his feet.

“Good, I just want Steve's-” he cut himself off looking sheepish. It was another one of Steve's traits that he shared with his dad, no brain to mouth filter, Steve was always putting his foot in his mouth, especially around the kids.

Still, Eddie really wanted to know what was at the end of that sentence.

“Steve's what?” Eddie asked just as Lenore Harrington joined them in the kitchen trailing a suitcase behind her that her husband was quick to take off her hands so he could ignore Eddie's question.

“Oh hello Eddie dear, did I hear Steve and Robin?” Lenore asked with a quick hug as she passed en route to the lounge, she didn’t wait for an answer as she sashayed past with an elegance that Steve had not inherited.

“Lenore’s mother is a bit of a drama queen,” Richard said as he followed Eddie and his brush to the hallway. “She’s been on the phone several times already tonight asking us to try to convince Steve and his lovely young lady to come with us.” he explained as Eddie swept up the fallen pine leaves.

“By young lady, I take it she means Robin?” Eddie asked as Richard added the case to the pile by the door.

“Yes. She’s rather old-fashioned Steven’s grandmother, I don’t think she really understands the dynamic between the two of them. She nearly had a heart attack when I moved her precious socialite daughter to Hawkins of all places.” Richard said with a little chuckle to himself. “I keep trying to convince her to come visit, she never does, I would love to see her face when she meets you.”

Eddie didn’t know how to take that, unsure if it was meant as an insult or a complement. Mr. Harrington didn’t seem to notice though as he followed Eddie as he swept the entire trail of pine needles away.

“Dad, are you trying to get Eddie to sign to your label again?” Steve asked as he broke free of his mother’s hug. Evidently the conversation had carried from the kitchen, either that or Steve’s mother was whispering in his ear again.

“Just looking after my future interests Steven. Eddie has talent and he would be an excellent addition to the Harrington family, or do the two of you really intend on spending the prime of your life negotiating late fees for someone else's business?”

“I’m happy if you are Eds?” Steve said as he gave his dad a quick hug, “Some of us aren’t built for jet setting around the world. Well, I’m sure, given half the chance Eddie would be off like a shot as long as it involved his guitar-,”

“I’d always have room for you as my glamorous assistant Stevie, you know this.” Eddie said as he brushed around the base of the tree where the worst of the needles had fallen.

“See what I mean? You can’t separate them, you know, a bit like freezer burned burgers or that weird black mold in the back of the fridge.” Robin piped up from her perch on the end of the sofa. “The longer I’m away, the more tragic their bond becomes.” She lamented, popping a marshmallow in her mouth and chewing it, never once dropping her menacing smile.

Lenore laughed as she pulled on her big winter coat. “Last chance to change your mind, you and Eddie are welcome to join us?”

“See, even you are treating them like a unit. I feel like I’ve been replaced. Have I been replaced, Steve?” Robin huffed as Steve dropped on the sofa next to her, he shot her with a loaded look, and Eddie suddenly felt like whatever conversation the two of them had been having in the car needed to be continued, possibly louder and possibly involving a fair bit of bitching.

Eddie was not stupid enough to get caught in the crossfire of that.

“As much as I appreciate the offer of getting out of dodge for the festive season, Wayne likes to have me about, and I feel like Mr. Harrington needs a few days off trying to wrangle his next big book deal.” Eddie said, handing the dustpan and brush to Steve to finish what Eddie had started.

“Speaking of Wayne, I should get home, I want to see him before he goes on to shift, so I better hit the road.”

Eddie couldn’t read the expression on Steve’s face, but he could tell that Robin was biting her lip to hold back whatever was on her mind. No doubt he was going to get sounded out as soon as he turned up at Steve’s tomorrow. There was no point in fighting the inevitable.

Eddie grabbed his coat and followed Mr. and Mrs. Harrington out to the cars, helping with the bags like the good little boy scout he was.

“Eddie?” Mr. Harrington asked just as he turned to jump back in his truck. Eddie spun on the spot, no matter how much he got on with the Harrington’s he was still deep down aware of the class divide. Permanently torn between needing to fight the hierarchy and knowing that there wasn’t a threat.

“Yeah, Mr. H?” Eddie asked as he pulled his coat tighter around himself.

Richard stepped closer, making sure that his wife couldn’t see him from the car.

“Can you keep an eye on Steve over the next few days? Something’s been up with him these last few weeks and he won’t tell me or his mother what it is.” He asked, and it made Eddie feel a little worried that Steve’s dad was coming to him out of all of his friends to watch him.

“I mean, Robin is back, she will get whatever it is out of him-” Eddie started, not wanting to share the secret that Steve had shared with him, not if Steve hadn’t shared it with his parents yet.

“But you know him best. Just, I don’t know, maybe he will tell you what’s wrong?” Richard said, gripping him on the shoulder and giving it a tight fatherly squeeze.

For the second time that night, Eddie felt like the rug was being pulled out from under him. First Steve telling him about his soulmate and now Richard Harrington saying that Eddie knew Steve best? Robin was right there, and when Steve’s soulmate finally made himself known the two of them would probably descend in the ranks. Although Eddie very much doubted that he would ever outrank Robin in that department.

“Yeah, alright, I will talk to him.” Eddie agreed, the feeling of being watched itched at him. His scar on his neck aching slightly with the cold. “You best get going if this snow gets worse they might ground the flight.”

“True, very true.” Richard said, moving his hand away, waving towards the house as he stepped back to the car. “Merry Christmas Eddie. Think about that book again please.” He said as he got in the car.

When the engine started Eddie moved away to get in his own truck, but not before looking back to the house to see who had been on the receiving end of the wave.

Steve stood in the window, backlit by the harsh overhead light, but it was clear to see he was watching Eddie, his hand resting against his neck.

They held eye contact for a moment before Steve waved and pulled the curtains shut.

Whatever that was about, Eddie would not look at it too hard right now.

Right now he needed to get home to Wayne, then later he could unpack the cluster fuck that had been the last twelve hours.

*************

Ever since Eddie had been old enough to fend for himself over Christmas, Wayne had taken the crap shifts over the holidays. The money was better, often double or triple time, and the two of them weren’t exactly in a place to say no to that back in the day. Now Wayne did the shifts so that the people with little kids could have it off, because that was just the sort of self sacrificing fool that the guy was. After all, Eddie had to get it from someone.

So Wayne had left him in the early hours of Christmas Eve, and Eddie had all the intentions in the world of getting himself to bed and maybe getting some much needed sleep.

Unfortunately, Eddie’s mind had other ideas.

He had finally nodded off just after 6am, his books and notebooks scattered around him as he went through all his notes on soulmates trying to itch that scratch in his brain that was triggered earlier by Steve in the car.

He couldn’t work out how Steve could have met his soulmate, not if he was close enough to them to have confirmed his suspicions in the last few weeks. He was pretty sure that was the strangeness that Mr. Harrington had noticed, and now Eddie was trying to work out if he had seen Steve acting weird around anyone they knew.

Eddie had run through every interaction that they'd had with people since thanksgiving. Maybe it was the new delivery driver? He was cute, if you were into the blond hair and blue eye’s thing. He had muscular arm’s and with all the lifting he did day in day out, and he looked like he was probably a jock in high school. Maybe that was Steve’s type?

What was Steve’s type, anyway? Now that Eddie was looking at it, he wasn’t even sure Steve had a type he jumped around between the Molly Ringwalds and the Sigourney Weaver of this world, but did that apply to guys too?

Was it Jeff? It was a possibility he supposed; they had hung out a bit recently, but Eddie was pretty sure that Jeff was head over ass for the girl that worked at the drive in.

Maybe it was the guy that worked the ticket booth at the drive in? The punk guy that got Eddie's heckles up every time he lent his slutty little waist up against the Beemer.

That would just be a crying shame, Steve lowering himself to the crushing on a punk.

He might have to rethink the whole friendship if Steve ended up being soulmates with someone whose musical taste revolved around only three chords.

The kicker though came when Eddie realized how much the whole thing was upsetting him. And the more he looked at it, the more he was realizing that he wasn't sure where the jealousy was coming from.

His knee jerk reaction had been that he was jealous that Steve had found his soulmate. But now?

Now he was questioning if it wasn't something more, if he wasn't jealous of the fact that Steve had feelings for another man and that man wasn't Eddie himself.

It was making Eddie question everything he knew about himself.

Because he couldn’t say he hadn't looked at other guys. He couldn't stand up and honestly say he hadn't seen photos of Ozzy and felt something more than an admiration for the man.

Did he have a crush on Ozzy Osborne? That would explain a few of the more questionable dreams.

So that opened up another question.

Did he have a crush on Steve?

It was certainly a possibility.

The two of them were constantly in each other's orbit, and they flirted like it was a second language that they were more than fluent in. Only now Eddie wasn’t sure that he hadn’t meant all the things he had been dishing out to Steve on the daily for the last few years.

If would explain the gut churning and the ache he was currently feeling at the thought of Steve having found his soulmate.

What had Robin called it? Bisexual.

Steve liked women and men, apparently that was a thing.

Was that a thing that could apply to Eddie?

He definitely liked women, that was a given, if he was to believe Steve he was getting the most action out of the two of them.

Although Eddie had hit a dry spell that was embarrassing even for a self confessed nerd like himself.

It had been at least nine months since he had to find excuses to sneak out of anyone's bed rather than face the awkward next day conversations.

He had been striking out lately, turning down dates when Steve asked him to hang out, Eddie was running over his last few dates in his head, had he been sabotaging them because they weren't Steve?

The more he looked at it the more likely it seemed.

Eddie knew he was spiraling. Knew if he could just sound out the busy thoughts in his head to someone, he might make them make sense. But the person he would normally run to was the source of his confusion and that left him nowhere to turn.

This definitely wasn't the thing that he and Wayne were finally having that big heart to heart over.

“Yeah Wayne, I think I'm in love with Steve.” even in his head it made him want to cringe and hide away.

Love ?

Oh fuck right off, it wasn't love.

It couldn't be love if he only just realized it was a viable option right ?

Only it wasn't, was it?

Steve had a soulmate. Eddie didn't.

It would be a match made to fail even if there was the smallest chance that Steve liked him back.

Maybe he should just keep his distance?

The idea of not seeing Steve made him ache in a way that he recognized now, it made him feel sick but now he understood what it meant.

And that made it a million times worse.

He had a joint and tried to make his brain stop for just a moment, and it must have worked.

The next thing he knew someone's car was grumbling to life outside in the street and sunlight was streaming through the window.

***********

His new resolution to stay away from Steve hadn't lasted long.

The snow had fallen again during his existential crisis last night and the world seemed merry and bright. Or as bright as it could be when all Eddie wanted for Christmas was an interdimensional rift to open under his feet and the demobats to go three for three on his earthly demise.

Steve had given them both the day off, perks of being the boss, and Eddie had expected to be one of the first to show up at the Harrington home to set about operation Christmas. Yet when he crunched up the driveway his own footprints got lost in the imprints left by the hoard that had evidently already descended. The kids having their own wheels these days was making him feel old .

He let himself in, Steve had left it unlocked to save him the hassle of having to keep getting up every person who pounded on the door.

Not that it would have mattered if the door was still locked. Eddie had a key.

That was another thing to add to his list of confusing things that had happened between him and Steve.

Steve had given him a key in the middle of the night when the nightmares got too bad. He could get in without waking the whole Harrington clan. If Steve rang him in a broken down state Eddie would drive over and let himself in, climb the stairs and hold Steve until he calmed.

Eddie didn't mind, more often than not he was in the same messed up state.

Trembling in the quiet of his and Wayne's new apartment, that would never feel like a home in the way the trailer had.

Steve's parents knew, they didn't seem phased by it.

Not in the way Eddie was sure they should when a guy who was once a wanted murderer wanders down from their son's bedroom first thing in the morning, sleep rumpled and looking for coffee.

It was all a little overfamiliar, and Eddie wasn’t sure how he was supposed to deal with someone else taking that place in Steve's life. Was this how Robin felt when she left for college? Because if it was Eddie understood the tears and the mini breakdown now. It was completely justified.

The absolute chaos he had expected greeted him as he crossed the threshold.

The kids had commandeered the job of dressing the tree. Max was yelling, bossing the boys about as was her God given right, and Will was trying and failing to get the others to decorate the back of the tree as well as the front.

It hung limply towards them threatening a topple under the weight of the many brightly colored baubles and static fairy lights, a pale comparison to the fluffy tree that Eddie and the four armed Steve-Robin beast had blundered through the door the night before.

Max looked just about ready to smack Lucas and Mike with her cane, just to get Will and her point across.

Jane sat on the sofa, a bastion of calm as her and Erica slid popcorn onto string making garlands, eating just as much as they threaded on the needle.

Apart from the ruckus, it made quite the sweet Christmas scene, even with the chaos unfolding.

The kids all had matching sweaters on, no doubt courtesy of Dustin’s mom. Eddie's hunch was confirmed when Robin walked up to him and dumped a neatly wrapped package in his arms.

“Claudia is trying to make this into a thing, and she scares me sooooooo….” Robin said, looking at the two bags of presents that Eddie had brought with him. He wished he had hung fire and left Steve and Robin's gifts in the car. Because Steve was right, he had bought him something pretty and now he was sure it was a stupid idea .

“You gotta be kidding me”

Steve's voice piped up from behind them, and now Eddie had the inkling, he knew exactly what that skip in his heart meant.

“Dustin, stop. You're going to pull the damn thing down, you already stripped the bottom two branches, and Eddie spent ages picking the needles up last night.”

Steve rushed past them both, carefully depositing the tray of hot chocolates on the coffee table as he passed. Erica and Jane wasted no time in grabbing the ones with the most marshmallows whilst the rest of the party were occupied.

Steve Reached out and secured the tree while the others removed some of the heavy ornaments that were causing it to buckle and bow.

“The children never listen.” Robin said sagely as she relieved Eddie of his bag and nudged the present in his hand, indicating he should probably open it.

Eddie was too distracted though, he couldn't stop looking at Steve. It was the first time he had seen him since he had come to terms with the recent development in his life and he was mentally kicking himself for not realizing what any of the obvious feelings he had for Steve had been before.

Eddie caught Steve’s eye, and something in Eddie's stomach swooped like he was about to plummet over the edge of a presapiss. Oh, he was done for.

He was definitely going to die old and alone, watching Steve happily live his life with another man.

If he had worked this out sooner would it have made any difference?

Probably not, Steve was his friend, he had zero romantic interest in Eddie.

Eddie just had to go making everything weird.

Evidently he had been staring too long, Robin dug him in the side again, glancing between Eddie and Steve and the strange staring contest that had started across the lounge.

‘Pathetic’ Robin muttered to herself, then aloud she said “Come on Munson, you're the only one not dressed in a Christmas monstrosity. Strip dude.”

“It's a good job I know you.” Eddie said, ripping the paper from the present and pulling out his own matching festive cheer. “I don't know if I like these bad habits you're learning at that fancy School of yours.”

“They teach me how to get oversized man-boys to do what I tell them.” She said, poking him in the side again with extra vigor.

She was vicious, for someone who's only recreational Sport was soccer, her upper body strength shouldn't be so good.

He quickly pulled his jacket off and yanked the black sweater he had been wearing over his head leaving him in just his faded and worn undershirt he hadn't intended for anyone else to bear witness too. From the sofa Max let off a loud wolf whistle, Eddie flipped her the bird, but he couldn't help glancing to see what Steve's reaction was. From beneath his flop of hair Steve's eyes were fixed on Eddie, and under his gaze Eddie felt himself starting to heat up.

“You've been defiling yourself with the devil's sacrament again?” Robin asked, grabbing his wrist. It shook him from whatever fleeting vision of possible interest he thought he had seen in Steve's eyes as Robin twisted his arm. She held on as she looked closer at his new tattoo. “Either Jeff is getting better with his little pricks, or you put on your big boy pants and went to a professional.”

“Ha ha hilarious.” Eddie said, trying to shake his arm free. “Me and Gareth went to Indi when he was back for Thanksgiving.”

“It's a bit morbid isn't it? Doubling down on the bats?”

“Robin, leave him alone. Come here and help me with this will you?” Steve shouted from across the room. But Robin was more interested in making fun of Eddie, after all she hadn’t seen him since she went away at the beginning of fall, she must be champing at the bit to bring him down a peg or two.

“You can just tell me it looks metal as hell if you like Bucks, you won’t lose any brownie points over it.” Eddie said, tugging his arm back.

“Never said it wasn’t cool, Munson. I just said it was morbid, I mean didn’t they technically kill you?”

“And technically Stevie boy brought me back to life, should I have tattooed a picture of the boy wonder on my arm? I could have gotten him in that nice little sailor outfit the two of you used to wear-” Robin punched him, hard in the shoulder. Her penchant for physical violence making itself known.

“Rob’s for fuck’ sake!” Steve piped up from behind them, as the tree crashed to the ground. The baubles scattering far and wide.

“Sorry! Sorry!” Robin said, rushing to help Steve get the Christmas tree back on its stand straight.

“What was all that about?” Dustin asked as he started scooping the ornaments from the rug, throwing them into the box they had come from.

“Nothing, tree was just too awkward to hold on my own and Robin abandoned me to beat up Eddie, instead of helping.” Steve grumbled, shooting Robin death glares.

Robin wasn’t showing any sort of remorse, holding the tree and watching as Eddie finally pulled on his Christmas sweater.

“None of you are fit to decorate this fine specimen, everyone knows you put the enormous balls near the bottom and you always decorate the ample behind.” Eddie said walking over and hooking a fat red bauble out of the fallen mess, he got close to Steve as he deliberately pressed close to get to the back of the tree, nudging Steve’s ass as he passed. God how had he not noticed just how loaded his flirting really had been getting.

“So, are you talking about personal experience then?” Steve asked, as Eddie hooked his ornament in place.

“Wouldn’t you like to know, big boy.” Eddie teased, surprised to see the tips of Steve’s ears flushing red. Was that a recent occurrence? Has that happened before? Eddie really hadn’t been looking, but now he was and it was something he was determined to investigate further.

Around them the kids had peeled off and were now diving into the hot chocolate that Steve had left on the table. He knew that their interest in actual manual labor would only last as long as it took for candy and chocolate to get involved.

Robin grabbed the discarded box of ornaments and divided her haul as the three of them worked quietly, Eddie acutely aware of every time his and Steve’s hands brushed his as they dressed the branches or maneuvered around the other.

Now Eddie was looking for it, it was surprising how often he and Steve casually touched. A hand to the bottom of his back, Steve leaning up tight against him the long line of his chest curving into Eddie’s back as he stretched to put the smaller ornaments towards the top of the tree.

Eddie was almost certain that Steve was lingering in his space more than normal, he could feel Robin watching them. It felt like he was under a microscope far worse than any time the kids had tried to trip him up and get the juicy details of his next campaign.

Every time he caught her looking he would be met with the smug ‘ I know something you don’t know’ look that she had learned from Erica and honed under Steve’s careful guidance.

“Have I got something on my face?” He asked as he hooked a small robin on the branch in front of her. “It’s rude to gawk you know, I might start getting the wrong sort of ideas about you Bucks,”

“I would rather gut myself and use the entrails to summon a demogorgon than look at you in any way that wasn’t just platonic you weirdo.” She straightened up the ornament, glancing over to where Steve had just stuck his head in one of the old Family Video shipping boxes to hunt out the remnants of last year's tinsel. “Which is more than I can say for you and Mr. Bubble butt.” She stage whispered as she lent into his space.

Eddie shot a glance over at the table where the kids had gathered, too busy fighting over the toppings for the Christmas cookies that Will had just gotten out of the oven, to pay much attention to what was happening over by the tree.

“Just because Steve… is … you know… doesn’t mean that he’s going to fawn about like a damsel in distress around any guy with a pulse.” Eddie chided under his breath.

“Never said he was. He might be a dingus, but he’s a dingus with standards. I wasn’t talking about him. I was on about you, what’s gotten into you tonight, you're normally a lot more covert when you’re scoping out the Harrington goods.” Robin goaded, “You can’t seriously think you're being subtle about it.”

Eddie tried to defend himself but he couldn’t exactly deny that he had just seconds before been staring at Steve’s ass in his stupid skin tight Levi, he opened his mouth to protest but nothing came out. He couldn't lie to Robin, she was too clever for subterfuge.

“It is a bubble butt, “ he settled on in lieu of finding a way to address her observations.

“That you can’t stay away from apparently. You don't have to say anything, but you know, if you need to talk about it, I don’t really share a brain with him you know?” Robin said quietly with a shrug.

“Thanks Robin,” he said earnestly.

“You looking for Narnia at the bottom of that box Steve?” Robin yelled suddenly, breaking whatever heartfelt moment the two of them were having.

“I can think of better ways to come out of the closet Robs’, ones that don't involve candy that tastes like perfume.” Steve said as he emerged from his quest, hands full of tinsel and fairy wire .He beckoned Dustin and Erica over to add it to the tree. No matter how much Steve liked to pretend he didn’t have favourites, Eddie knew better. They ignored him completely of course, too involved in debating who deserved the cookie that had come out of the oven looking comedically phallic shaped.

“Come on, let's deck this baby and then see if they have left us any cock cookies to decorate.” Eddie said, reaching out to grab a handful of shredded silver.

“Right after we dick the halls?” Steve asked as he tried to hide a bald patch with some of the silver and red tinsel.

“Well, you have to, right before you jingle balls, especially if you want a white christmas…” Eddie reasoned, taking extra joy in the way that Robin gagged before throwing a plastic baby Jesus at him.

Eddie watched as Steve and Robin started lobbying clumps of glitter at each other laughing and giggling like little kids, although they managed to avoid hitting the tree in their play fight thankfully, Eddie wasn't convinced he had it in him to decorate the thing again.

It made his heart happy to see Robin and Steve like this, screwing about and looking the fool with his best friend.

Could Eddie deal with it if this was all he got to have?

Maybe he was confusing friendship for love, after all Steve had made the same mistake when it came to Robin. Finding answers on a bathroom floor was all well and good but Eddie didn't think that would work the same between him and Steve.

Maybe he would be lucky. Maybe he would get to hold on to this. To feel like he was part of something good, even when Steve’s other half joined them. Eddie was sure more than ever that nobody could be On the receiving end of one of Steve's longing looks and not cave in at the first flutters eyelid , still he dreaded the day a forth wheel joined them.

He didn't have much time to wallow in his own self pitty, soon he had a face full of tinsel and he was drawn into the fray.

*******

It was getting dark when they finally got all the decorations in place, the kids had decided that now the complicated bit of untangling the mess off lights and cleaning up the deluge of pine needles was tackled by the ‘older kids’ (Eddie refused to let anyone call him an adult) they would all join in, fighting over who got to put the star on the top of the tree.

“Technically, it should be Steve, I mean it is his house.” Max reasoned, glaring at Dustin who was currently in possession of the shiny metal adornment. The man in question glared at her before handing it over to Steve.

“How generous.” Steve snarked, as he turned to the tree and reached up to tuck the star in its rightful place.

“Hey Steve?” Dustin asked.

“Okay, okay …I’ll let you turn the lights on,” Steve said exasperated.

“No, I mean yes I want to turn the lights on. But this isn’t about that. When did you get a tattoo?” Dustin asked, reaching out and grabbing Steve’s right arm, pushing the sleeve of his sweater up to look at the skin underneath.

You could hear a pin drop, Eddie didn’t think he had ever known the kids be this quiet ever, all eyes drawn to where Dustin was holding Steve’s arm out for inspection.

Silently someone turned on the fairy lights, giving everyone a clear view of the six highly stylized bats on the inside of his right arm.

That was when all hell broke loose.

“Right. Everyone just be quiet.” Robin yelled over the commotion. “Everyone out … not you Eddie.” she added, pushing him towards Steve.

“But presents…” someone complained, probably Dustin, Eddie didn't have it in him to look away from the damning evidence illuminated in reds and greens.

“The purple bag is all the kids’ presents from me,” Eddie said, not looking up. He knew all eyes were on him and Steve and for the first time ever he really didn't want to be the center of attention.

“Yeah, that one with a snowman on has mine in, dish them out between you.” Steve waved his hand in the general direction of the pile of gift bags on the sideboard.

Eddie traced the movement, yup that was definitely his tattoo etched on Steve's skin.

Fuck.

Eddie didn’t know what was happening around him other than Robin was ushering the kids out of the door as fast as humanly possible. He could hear Dustin huffing at being made to leave, but he also heard Robin threatening to expose his deepest darkest secrets if he didn't get a move on.

Any other time that would have piqued Eddie's curiosity, but right now he couldn't make sense of anything enough to form any coherent thought.

“Call me if you need me.” Robin yelled as she slammed the door behind her.

“Alright-” “Okay” Both of them shouted after her. To be fair, she could have been speaking to either of them, but Eddie had a feeling she meant both.

The house was calm now. The crackling sound of the old and lightly scratched Christmas record accompanying the popping of the logs on the fire.

It had been a long time since a silence between him and Steve had felt awkward, but Eddie wasn’t sure how to fill this one. It stretched, and he ached to fill it but his mind was racing, trying to patch together everything that had happened to him since spring break of ‘86. It was as if the tiny bit of string that had been holding the box of his realisation closed had just frayed and the box had split at the seams. Leaving him to wade through the deluge of information in a new light.

“So,” Eddie started eventually, when the quiet became too much.

“So,” Steve echoed back.

“Robin’s kind of right. It is a little morbid.” Eddie nodded at Steve’s arm, chancing a step forward to get a better look. It wasn’t ink under his skin, it was dark red, almost black, but fading at the edges.

It was fading at least, Eddie felt guilt building up, Steve had enough scars, he didn’t need more, no matter how temporary this blip on his skin was.

“Yeah, well, I was expecting it to have disappeared by now, but apparently you have a habit of sticking around.” Steve huffed.

It had been almost four weeks, and the bats on Steve’s arms looked like they were fresh. He looked like he wanted to say more, but bit his lip trying to hold back the words. He stepped back, pulling his sweater back down over his hands.

“Trust Dustin to be observant for the first time in his life.” He said, but his voice sounded distant, like he was on the verge of tears.

“If you want to leave, I wouldn’t blame you.” Steve said as he turned his attention to the tree, fiddling with one of the paper stars that hung on the nearest branch.

“Like I said yesterday, The chances of anything coming from Mars are a million to one.”

Eddie really wished that Steve would look at him. He might have hidden away the newest scar under the sleeves of his sweater, but Eddie could see the silver markings tracing round his neck as they flecked red and green in the shimmer of the Christmas lights.

He instinctively brought his hand up to his own neck, tracing his own scar, the way it twisted up into the the back of his hairline and up behind his ear. Steve’s was similar but just how similar?

They had both grown their hair out to hide the worst of it so it was well hidden but…

Curiosity got the better of him, reaching out he gently brushed the hair from behind Steve’s left ear, tracing the end of the scar his fingers swooped up behind and into Steve's hairline. An almost perfect copy of Eddie's second most dangerous wound.

Under his touch Steve froze, but his fingertips betrayed Steve’s heart. The pulse thrummed through his skin at a rapid rate, making Eddie’s heart want to chase and match the rhythm.

“You do know that quoting nerd shit at me is going to have the opposite of a negative effect on me right?” He asked, hoping that for once Steve would just see through his words.

“Stevie? Yesterday you said…” Eddie trailed off, yesterday Steve had said a lot of things.

Eddie had become overly very familiar with them all in the last twenty four hours.

But the shining factoids that were barreling around his mind at a billion miles a second, causing galaxy’s to implode and die as fast as they were born, were this:

Steve liked men.

Steve had found his soulmate.

Steve had feelings for his soulmate that he thought were not returned.

Eddie liked men.

Eddie may well have found his soulmate, right under his nose and in plain sight.

Eddie definitely had feelings for Steve, it was very much returned.

“I hadn’t… I didn’t…” Eddie was lost for words, a rare occurrence, normally he had way too many words and nothing to do with them. But finding the right ones here, so as not to screw this up, felt like he was pushing a boulder uphill and the landslide of destruction was fighting him every step of the way.

“Steve… in the car… you said he was oblivious. I… I… was oblivious.”

“Yeah well, surprise.” Steve said weakly, almost on the edge of tears. “I’m your soulmate, sorry it's not some metal chick with huge tits that loves all your nerd shit.” He tried to pull away from where Eddie held him, but a simple tug at the base of Steve’s hair stopped him in his tracks.

“You are perfectly nerdy, and you have fantastic boobies Harrington, You also happen to be several chapters ahead in this book we call life. You gotta let me catch up, I only found out I was allowed to like guys and girls yesterday. The old grey matter isn’t what it used to be. I’m processing a lot.”

Steve turned to look at him, pressing his cheek into Eddie’s open hand, Eddie’s fingers still tracing the twisting scar tissue. The move felt familiar, even if Eddie was sure they had never done this before, a calm settling through him like thick toffee in his veins.

“And do you?”

“Do I what?”

“Like guys as well?” Steve sounded so hopeful that Eddie was sure he wasn’t going to get shot down from a great height. Steve had Eddie’s marks all over him and Eddie had just been to stupid to see what was staring him in the face all this time.

Eddie wanted to see Steve smile again, catch that starlight from the tree sparkling in his eyes rather than in his tears.

“I like you Steve. And I like you a lot. But you're not just any guy are you? You’re you, and apparently the universe thinks I’m good enough to make you happy.”

“And you do Eds, nobody else has ever made me laugh so hard I want to puke. Or at least nobody ever made me laugh so much I split my stitches. Nobody else has stupidly dived head first into danger with a hero complexion just to put me first.” He shot Eddie a loaded look as if to say ‘ am I wrong?’ and Eddie couldn’t argue the facts. “Someone's gotta keep saving your life. If fate says it’s me, who am I to argue?” Steve said with a wet sniffle, yet the smile was starting to creep back on his face. Eddie carefully wiped away the tears that had dropped to Steve’s cheeks with the sleeve of his Christmas sweater.

“Fate could have clued me in a little bit sooner,” Eddie said, chancing a step closer to Steve, pushing Steve’s sleeve up and run his fingers over the bats, curling behind them he traced his fingers over the raised scar they both shared from luring away the demodog from Max’s hospital room. A shared sacrifice, a decision made together. Was that the point this had taken hold?

Just how long had the two of them been entwined like this?

As if reading Eddie’s mind Steve took his free hand and lifted it to Eddie’s neck pressing gently at the left of his adams apple.

“It was such a tiny nic, I don’t think you even noticed it, but the bottle was pretty sharp when you pressed it to my neck. I felt it then, the first spark of something, an adrenaline rush pulsing under my skin like electricity. Dad had tried to explain it to me before, but I wrote it off as a load of bullshit. But there you were, living proof that the shit dad pedals for a living was actually true. But you were so scared and so stressed that I don’t think you even registered the scar showing on your skin, let alone the elevated heart rate and the scar had faded by the time we jumped in the lake.”

“The boat house? That’s where the bond happened?”

“Yeah, and I thought you were such an asshole, it had to be some cosmic joke. A twisted mistake, that Eddie Munson was my soulmate. But then you dived into the lake after me, and you kept just knowing what I was thinking when we were in the Upside Down. It was like you knew exactly what I was going to say and do even when I wasn't sure myself. Then I couldn’t believe you would run into danger to keep Dustin safe. To keep me and the others safe, when you hardly knew us.” Steve said, inching his way more into Eddie’s space. “Only my stupid ass soulmate would go being a hero when he had been told in no uncertain terms not to do that. ‘Cause that’s exactly what I would have done too”

Realization dawned on Eddie like the sun coming out from behind the darkest of rain clouds. It had been Steve’s voice he had followed back from the brink of death.

“It was you, you called me back.”

“Yeah, well Dustin worships you dude. I couldn’t just let you go and die on me.”

“Oh, so you only saved me so you didn’t have to be a single father, I understand.”

“No you dipshit, I saved you cause you slipping away was the worst pain I’ve ever felt in my life. And I’ve had several concussions and had part of my stomach sewn back together in a field hospital.”

“You say the most romantic things baby.” Eddie said with a grin, “Intestines are sexy.”

“You are so weird.” Steve said with a smile, his thumb stroking the length of Eddie’s matching scar.

“You’re the weird one that keeps saving me with your creepy soulmate powers, don’t go blaming-” Steve cut him off, shoving his hand over Eddie’s mouth and rolling his eyes with a sniff, the last of the tears now gone. It took everything in Eddie’s power not to lick his palm.

“And I would save you a million times more, because for some insane reason I’m extremely glad the fates decided you’re my other half, even if you are a feral racoon of a man.”

“Mmnsnatmuccun”

“What?” Steve asked, removing his hand.

“I said, I’m not a raccoon.” Eddie answered, letting himself be brave and pulling Steve towards him by his waist.

“I’ve seen you eat from the trash dude, definitely raccoon behaviour.” Steve said with a smirk. Letting himself be pulled in.

“It was one peanut butter cup, and the bin was brand new.” Eddie said in his defence, “Anyway I think that says more about you than it does me, I mean you’re the one who wants to kiss someone who ate something out of the trash.”

“Well you did say I was weird,” Steve reasoned as he lent in closer, “But you're right. I really want to kiss you Eddie, I have done for a long time.”

“Then we better make sure we aren't about to be invaded by little green men from Mars, ‘cause I really want to kiss you-” This time Steve cut him off with his lips. Eddie definitely liked it a lot better than the palm of his hand.

It was a sweet thing, tentative in a way Eddie hadn’t been expecting, but it felt different to every other kiss he’d had to date, the gentle thrum of belonging radiating from the soft press of Steve’s lips to his own.

Steve’s hands twist up into his hair, grounding him and deepening the kiss, pulling and pushing against each other until Eddie could taste the chocolate on Steve’s tongue and feel his body pressed hard against him.

It was all too much and not even a tiny bit enough.

All too soon Steve broke the kiss, his soft breath ghosting Eddie’s lips as he started to pull away.

“Nope, get back here.” Eddie muttered pitifully, pulling Steve back towards him. “Just so we're on the same page.If you look up the words oblivious, scared and idiot they all have my name next to them in the dictionary. Right under the entry that Robin has edited to deem me pathetic.”

“How would you know? You don’t know how to use a dictionary, that's why dad keeps telling you he will get you an editor.” Steve said with a chuckle, moving to pull Eddie closer.

“Don’t you start sweetheart.” Eddie softly scalded. “I can say no to your dad. But you start batting eyelashes at me and I’m done for.”

“He’s just looking out for you… for us.” Steve said bashfully. “He’s practically married us off already if you hadn’t guessed.”

Suddenly Mr. Harrington’s fumbling words made more sense, the insistence that he wanted to help Eddie in his writing career, the way he hadn’t battered an eyelid that first time Eddie had sauntered downstairs scars out in search of caffeine.

“How long has your dad known?” Eddie asked wearily, aware that he may well be the last person to have picked up on the glaringly obvious.

Steve itched at the scar on his neck, and now that Eddie knew they were connected, he could feel the ghost of it on his skin. Just how many nights had Steve been lying awake thinking of him, because the tingling was like a hug as it washed through him.

“Since you were in a coma the first time? ” Steve said sheepishly, “I swear other than Robin I didn’t mention it to anyone else… If you didn’t want me I didn’t want to become a pity case. Have you seen Dustin aim for sympathy? It’s like watching a muppet show real emotion, it makes me uncomfortable.”

“Of course you told Robin, I wouldn’t expect anything else, at least that explains why you got all weird whenever I brought up your soulmate” Eddie wasn’t sure how to process the fact that Mr. Harrington had known about this since 86 and had managed to keep his mouth shut about the whole thing since then.

“But Still. How did your dad know?”

Steve looked at Eddie dumbfounded, “Eddie, did you ever look to see who wrote the books you have been hoarding in your dragon cave? The ones about soulmates that you think nobody but you knows about?”

Eddie had not in fact looked, not even once, but now he was questioning if that was a major oversight on his behalf.

“Dad has been doing research and writing about Soulmates for the best part of twenty years now,” Steve said, pulling him in from the waist this time, taking the lead. “I was confused, because up until that point, I hadn’t really thought that my soulmate could be a man, let alone someone I thought was the very definition of straight. Turns out fate, just like my parents, doesn't really give a shit if I love another dude, just as long as it makes me happy.” Steve laughed. “And just so you know, him and Uncle Wayne have been plotting behind your back, I think I get you for like … two pigs and a packet of magic beans.”

“Wayne knows?”

“He has his suspicions.” Steve admitted. And yeah maybe Wayne did suspect something, his old man knew him better than he knew himself.

But now Eddie knew what he wanted, understood all the strange feelings in the pit of his stomach and the way his heart raced now was all down to the man who was holding him like he was something precious.

“Wayne knows to barter better than that, I’m worth at least three chickens, a pig and a cow, the only beanstalk I’ll be climbing at any point is you,” Eddie said with a flirty wink.

“Speedrunning the whole bisexual thing are we?” Steve gulped.

“I'm Stevesexual, If that isn’t a thing?” He asked, "I'm making it a thing.”

“I don’t think that’s how it works, baby.” Steve said , and that baby tugged at the part of his brain marked horny and flicked a few switches for good measure.

“Is it not in one of your dad’s books?”

“If it was, you would have found it by now.” Steve said as he lent in and stole another kiss. Eddie’s heart sped up, this was what he had been missing, this was the thing he had been searching for not knowing that he had already found it.

“Another disclaimer,” Eddie said when they broke apart. “I was in love with you before I found out you were my soulmate, so don't think this is all just because it's something I think the universe wants from me.”

“When have you ever done anything someone expected Eds,” Steve said with a dopey grin, “I can't even get you to follow a rota, let alone someone invisible forces master plan. Why did you think I was so scared you weren't going to like me back?”

“Well that's just crazy thinking, this time the universe didn't have to help, I think I'd have fallen for you no matter what Stevie,”

Steve’s hands started to wander, and somewhere in Eddie’s peripheral, he heard the record skip to the end of the last song, its gentle hiss accompanied by the soft but hungry sounds Steve was making in the back of his throat as he kissed him deeply.

“You got anywhere you need to be?” Steve asked as he came up for breath, “Or…”

Eddie smirked and tugged them towards the stairs.

“What about the presents?” Steve questioned as they passed the hallway table.

“It's not christmas day until tomorrow. You’re trinkets will wait until morning sweet prince,” Eddie said, ushering for Steve to ascend the steps after him.

“I thought whores would have their trinkets?” Steve asked.

“You can be both.” Eddie said, matching Steve's teasing tone. “Now if you wouldn't mind, I would like to assess just how many of our scars actually match.” He said with a loaded wink, acting a lot more confident than he actually felt. He was a showman after all.

“Merry Christmas to me?” Steve asked and he was honest to god blushing now, how had Eddie missed this for so long it was adorable.

“Merry Christmas to us both, baby, and here's to many more.” He said with a kiss as he pulled Steve into his room.

[slytherinshua]

ıllı　TABLOIDS GONNA LOVE THIS　( 휴닝카이 )

genre fluff , friends to lovers , popstar au , hueningkai x fem!reader   cw paparazzi here to ruin everything (be a helpful plot device) once again , not proofread   wc 1365   request @hyperdramas   note ik this idea was originally supposed to be indie band kai but the popstar fame idea was stronger than me skdjksd kai is so hot i love him, and hope you like it lyr !! tagging @soobchwe <3   net @kstrucknet @moadiarynet

Kai couldn’t write a single song that wasn’t about you. Although he always denied the fact, he knew that you were his inspiration. He poured his feelings out into pages and pages of lyrics, strumming patterns on his guitar in his studio for hours on end. The result was another smash hit, dominating the charts worldwide for weeks. Kai was known as a sensation, the best of his generation. No one knew who was the real reason for his success, though. Not even you.

You were back in Kai’s studio, legs sprawled over the back of his couch, staring at the ceiling as he played demos from his speakers. The beat was nice, and Kai’s vocals, although rough, still sounded heavenly. On rare occasions, you hated being the best friend to the world’s biggest artist. Wishing Kai was still a nobody like he was a few years ago, so you both could spend time together in the normal way. But most of the time, you loved every second of his popstar life. 

From hearing songs before their release, to free tickets wherever he was touring, you got benefits no one else did just from being Kai’s best friend. But you would never take it for granted. He would always be your friend before an international star. 99% of the time, you just saw him as your Kai, the same boy you had practically grown up with attached by the hips.

“So, what do you think?” Kai asked, pausing the song after the second verse. 

“It’s good. But you already knew that,” you said, smiling. “How do you manage to do it every time? The lyrics are always straight from the heart.”

Kai smiled. “I’ve just got good inspiration, I guess.” 

“And who would that be? Who are you singing your heart out for?” You crossed your arms, curious to hear his answer. If there was ever a chance to tease Kai about something, you would take it. Whether it was the fact that he had no friends or still slept with his childhood plushies, you never let him hear the end of it. A chance to tease him about a possible crush was an opportunity you wouldn’t pass up.

“No one in particular,” Kai shrugged, eyes darting up to the ceiling. You could tell he was lying immediately, and a grin spread on your face. 

“Come on, I know there must be someone! Every great artist has to have their muse.”

“Just someone I know,” he said simply, huffing at your stubborn resolve to get the answer out of him. He was really bad at lying, especially to you. But his stomach twisted at the thought of you finding out you were the inspiration for… every single song he ever wrote. If you found out, he’d either have a full album of relationship songs within the year, or a heartbreak album so depressing the entire world would be brought to tears. He wasn’t too keen on the latter.

“You know like… 3 people total. Me, Taehyun, and Lily. Oh my god— is it Lily!? Seriously?” you exclaimed, sitting up like a spring. Kai groaned.

“It’s not Lily. Stop wondering and help me think of a bass line,” he grabbed the bass from its stand and sat down next to you, thumbing at the strings to produce deep low notes from the instrument. 

You sighed, turning your attention to the notes he played. Your mind still lingered back to who his songs were about. You didn’t think Lily was a bad guess— she had even featured on one of his biggest hits. She had an insane voice that complemented Kai’s beautifully. It could be her.

But you also knew Kai was nearly incapable of lying to you. If he said it wasn’t her, then it probably wasn’t. That left the possibility of a mystery woman that he had met and you didn’t know about. Unlikely. Or… you. Very likely.

“Come on, let’s go out for dinner! It’s Valentine’s day. Neither of us have a date, so let’s just be each other’s!” Kai pleaded, pulling on your arm. He had shown up to your apartment with a small bouquet of roses, claiming he got it for you for a “friend date”. You had originally planned to stay in bed all night, watching rom-coms that would make you feel hopelessly single, but you couldn’t refuse a dinner offer from Kai. You put on the fanciest dress you could find and met Kai by the door twenty minutes later, taking the flowers from his hand. 

“You look pretty. Let’s go,” he said, smiling widely. He was out the door before you had a chance to process why your cheeks flushed from his comment. 

The restaurant he took you to was fancy, unsurprisingly. You didn’t even want to know how much the food cost. You could easily say it was the best food you had ever tasted, and it wasn’t like your best friend was struggling in the financial department. Valentines, which you always used to dread as it was spent single and depressed, was turning out to be quite pleasant instead thanks to Kai. Until you heard the unmistakable sound of a camera click from behind you.

“Kai,” you whispered, grabbing his attention. “Is someone taking pictures of us?” 

He looked around, alarmed, eyes scanning the other tables like a hawk. Once he located the camera, and the paparazzi it belonged to, his face twisted in irritation. He was used to his outings getting ruined by flashing cameras and crowds of people asking for autographs, but he hated that you had been accidentally dragged into it. He could already imagine the headlines tomorrow if those photos reached the public. He was at a romantic restaurant, dressed up, on Valentine’s day, with a date. 

“Go to the bathrooms. I’ll meet you there. Try to keep your face covered, okay?” he instructed, tone softening although he still looked pissed. You nodded and stood up, weaving your way through the tables of people until you found the bathrooms. 

The wait for Kai to join you felt like hours, and you were hyper alert for any sign of cameras or flashes. Even running into other people walking past the bathrooms had you tense. You knew the power paparazzi had, especially if their pictures reached tabloids. Huening Kai was the hottest star in the industry, and millions of people were desperate to get a glimpse into his personal life. A leak of this size could cause headaches for weeks. You hoped he could handle the situation well enough. 

When Kai finally arrived, he ushered you into one of the unisex bathrooms and closed the door, locking it for privacy. 

“So, bad news. The entire world may think that you’re my girlfriend tomorrow,” he muttered, running a hand through his hair and pulling on the strands in frustration. 

“What?” 

“There were multiple people and they all got pictures. I think they already got leaked by now. Even if I sue them and get the pictures taken down, millions will have already seen them. I’m so so sorry,” Kai told you.

Your face fell, knowing there was nothing you could do to prevent it. You really should have stayed home and watched those romcoms instead of going to dinner. 

“I can say that you’re just my friend. I don’t know how believable it will seem, though. We both dressed up for this, and it’s freaking Valentine’s day.” 

You sighed.

“It’s okay. What if… I just pretended to be your girlfriend? Then you won’t have to try to do damage control,” you offered, mulling over the options and outcomes. 

“What if you didn’t have to pretend?” Kai asked, taking a brave step for once. 

“What do you mean? We’re not dating.” 

“We could be.” 

“Are you seriously asking me out in the bathroom of a restaurant?” you teased, making Kai smile.

“And if I am?” You knew that look in his eyes, a soft glimmer. He really was in love with you.

“Then, I guess I’d say yes,” you smiled. He was lucky you were just as in love with him. 

“Tabloids are gonna love this story.”

txt taglist (bolded could not be tagged): @kangtaehyunzzz,, @eternalgyu,, @90steele,, @ddeonudepressions,, @cham3li,,

@wolfmoonmusic,, @98-0603,, @weird-bookworm,, @candewlsy,, @blossominghunnie,,

@amara-mars,, @wccycc,, @seunghancore,, @ujisworld,, @sobun1est,,

@bananabubble,, @talkingsaxy,, @sxmmerberries,, @talking-saxy,, @nicholasluvbot,,

@cupidslovearrows,, @50-husbands,, @hursheys,, @stannwjnss,, @gong-fourz,,

@nonononranghaee,, @forever-atiny,, @stantxtforabetterlife,, @loserlvrss

[yeslordmyking]

Genesis 3:15 — Today's Verse for Friday, March 15, 2024