#v vitti

[kl-writes]

Zor/Phantom backstory drabble

I am honestly excited for IEYTD4 to come and disprove my theory/headcanon about Zor and the Phantom. In the meantime, it's good fanfic fodder.

Suddenly, the door to the room slammed shut. A mechanical hum reverberated to the room. V felt a pull on her waist, which sent her flying towards a wall. She saw Zor fly towards the other wall, head-first. His head struck it with a sickening crack. He slumped, head held firmly in place.

"Zor!" shouted V, "Zor, are you alright?"

"I'm fine, just… concussed. Probably bleeding. The walls are magnetized, if you undo your belt you should be fine."

The ceiling above them clanged open, revealing spikes. The spikes began to descend with a grinding screech.

"Just hold on, I'll be right there!" V struggled to get at the clasp of her belt.

Excalibur's voice crackled to life over the intercoms. "Oh my, it looks like love on the battlefield really does exist. How disgusting."

"You're going to die slow, Excalibur," spat Zor with a second wind fueled by rage.

"Don't make promises you can't keep, doctor. I suppose this is where I should berate you for choosing personal feelings over loyalty, but I was going to kill you anyways. You're simply too dangerous to keep around. But I should thank you for luring an agent into a death trap. Even if this time wasn't intentional." Excalibur laughed maniacally, then cut the audio.

V unclasped her belt, freeing herself from the wall. "I suppose it's a good thing you took my gun and tools, or else that would've been a lot harder."

"You'll still need them now, to get at the control box." Zor grunted, trying to push off from the wall. "If you can just unscrew the false panel, we can disable it."

"Here, let me unclasp you belt-"

"That won't help, my mask is what's magnetized."

"I thought gold wasn't magnetic."

"It isn't! But it's also expensive, this is gold-frosted steel."

The spikes from the ceiling descended ever closer. With some effort, V shoved Zor down into a sitting position. But with V's tools at Zor's waist, they couldn't maneuver to muscle even a screwdriver away from the wall.

Their last moments alive, and they couldn't even look each other in the eyes because of Zor's mask. V slumped to the ground next to him.

Zor clasped his hand around V's. "I love you."

"Zor, I-"

The spiked ceiling screeched to a halt.

Zor scoffed, "Don't tell me he forgot the launch codes to the doomsday device."

"Doomsday device?"

The knob to the door began to jiggle. Muffled cursing rang out, and finally the door popped open. Agent R walked into the room, smiling when he saw V.

"R! You saved us."

"Of course! We are partners, after all. You have my complete trust and loyalty. I'm not about to let the likes of Excalibur take you out." Agent R looked over at Zor, still pinned to the wall by the magnetic trap. "And you've finally captured Zor, too! Well, it looks like this mission is a success."

"Er, right. That's a bit more complicated," said V. "Look, the walls are still magnetized, you'll have to take your watch and belt off."

"Right-o!" Agent R undid his watch, then his belt with his toolkit in it. He walked over to look Zor in the face. He saw his own face reflected in Zor's golden mask.

V rifled through R's toolkit, then pried the tazer-pen away from the wall.

"Now, I know standard procedure is to wait until extraction for interrogation, but I don't think the Handler would mind if I got a peak under that mask. I've been on the edge of my seat about it this whole time!" Agent R lifted a hand up to Zor's mask. "Now, where is the clasp-"

"I'm sorry, Reggie." V shot Agent R with the tazer-pen. He crumpled to the ground instantly.

Zor let out a sigh of relief as V rifled through the rest of Agent R's toolkit. V finally found Agent R's trusty screwdriver, and used it to pry open the control panel for the magnetic trap.

"Remove the grounding screws and then cut the wires in alphabetical order by color," said Zor. "Otherwise you'll set off the electrified floor."

"And here I thought only you came up with convoluted traps."

Zor paused, "Well, this is one of mine, too. I did most of the security engineering for Excalibur."

V gave him a look, then disabled the magnetic field. Zor pried themself away from the wall, stretching their muscles in relief.

V looked down at Agent R's snoring body. "It's really all over, isn't it?"

"Reggie, huh? I suppose he didn't seem too bad," Zor scratched the back of his head. "For an EOD agent, anyways. I don't mind taking care of him if it's too sensitive for you."

"Take care of-" V stepped back. This wasn't happening. "No! We're not killing R."

"Well, we can't just let him report back to EOD. They'd kill you." Zor scoffed, then leveled his pistol at Agent R. "This is for your own good."

[the-valiant-valkyrie]

a compilation of overcomplicated hypothetical future IEYTD installments that i would kill to be canon

ft various spoilers for all three of the current non-hypothetical installments also ft really bad names for them in order to keep the list organized

I Expect You To Die; Once Burned, Twice Shy

During one of their usual heists against one of Zoraxis' latest schemes, Phoenix finds themself caught in what turns out to have been an orchestrated trap from the start. Not only is Zoraxis unscathed from the agent's attempt to stop their plans, but in the process, they find a way to pin their escape/the damage left behind on Phoenix in a catastrophic way, severing the Agency's trust in them and their handler.

Time after time again, Zoraxis have underestimated the Agent, but by separating the biggest thorn in their side from their main source of intelligence, power, and even locomotion, what can they possibly do to stop them from tearing down the rest of the Agency? And how is the Agency supposed to stop them without their star pupil turned 'traitor'?

Left with nothing aside from the guidance of their handler and their own sharp intuition- devoid of the Agency's tools or assistance- Phoenix needs to prove to Zoraxis and everyone else that they're more than just the tools the Agency lets them wield.

The 'gimmick' of this plot is kind of meant to be a parallel to what happened with Zoraxis at the end of the sequel. That being losing their trust with the rest of the world, and being forced to work in the shadows as opposed to hiding in plain sight. Because of this, a variation of this plot could be Zoraxis framing the entire Agency, instead of just Phoenix, forcing all of them to work and exist under the radar until they can clear their names. I just think the Phoenix specific plot is more entertaining, and made more personal by focusing on the protagonist.

I Expect You To Die; Pick Your Poison

The Fabricator probably has the most untapped potential and implied history with the Agency aside from Zor themself. While to me it feels like she's such an important character any plot that focuses on her would be a very late-game element, I can definitely see her serving as the 'main' antagonist of her own entry to the series.

The Agency- despite knowing the location of at least one of the Fabricator's workshops, are too intimidated by her lethality and talent to consider sending any more Agents to apprehend or face off against her. Behind Zor themself, they've gone on to list her in her dossier as the most lethal mind in Zoraxis' sprawling arsenal.

The Fabricator already has a bit of a vendetta against the agent, if not for the damage done to her workshop, then for the damage done to Zor's schemes, and by association, all of the tech she engineered for them.

There is also the point to consider that the Fabricator is in a very interesting place, for an antagonist position. Knowledgeable enough to know what happens to disappointing Zoraxis operatives- the cause of Juniper's death, almost Prism's, and who knows who else's- and yet… she seems more or less unbothered to remain by their side despite. The Agency wanting to get the Fabricator out of Zor's hands partnered with her seemingly deep running loyalty has very interesting implications for a betrayal arc of sorts.

I Expect You To Die; Reach for the Sky

Solaris is another character that has been brought up again and again in various ways, implying relevance- or at least, future relevance- to the series. While it would make perfect sense for her to accompany a Fabricator-focused installment, there's an equal probability for her to get something to herself.

Solaris- while perhaps not considered as dangerous as the Fabricator- is on par with her in terms of intelligence, and the Death Engine is still considered by the Agency to be one of the most powerful weapons to scourge humanity (as opposed to exclusively agents, as something like project KBOOM would have been).

While her loyalties to Zoraxis were obviously shaky even during her first appearance, Solaris is very self driven, and just because she may have broken ties with Zoraxis* doesn't mean she's completely out of the picture. As one of the Fabricator's tapes in Eaves Drop would suggest, Solaris still holds a grudge on the agent that destroyed her life's work. It isn't out of the question to consider that she would try to seek out her revenge, even on her own terms.

It's interesting to consider an arc that separates on competing with Zoraxis, rather than against them. Maybe- despite severing alliances with them- Solaris' tech is still of interest to Zor, which gets them involved the spat by proxy. Or maybe Zor- much like what they did when Anna intended to defect- is sending out a couple of operatives to take care of their newest loose end, with Phoenix finding themself caught in the crossfire.

*It is also possible that Solaris' 'defecting' from Zoraxis may have been a hoax or an effort to save face, with her being publicly tied to a newly exposed homicidal company. While somewhat unlikely, were this the case I don't think much about this hypothetical plot would change, save for Zoraxis being more of a main player (as they usually are) as opposed to a background threat.

I Expect You To Die; Playing With Fire

Vitti will almost certainly be given a mainstage role in a future installment, though with so little known about her, it's difficult to place how or where she'll show up. We know she used to be a field agent (maybe even Reginald's agent, when we consider that he used to hold the title of 'lead handler' at the same time she was 'lead agent'), and that she either had or gained ties to Zoraxis that may have lead to her erasure from Agency history. She also has the best case argument for being the Phantom, implying an interest in the Phoenix, as well as their survival.

To me, she's the perfect case for a betrayal/eluding-to-betrayal style arc without dipping into mind control. With the Agency being a dubiously-moral force as it stands, Vitti seems the perfect character to at least raise the potential that the Agency isn't really as good as they project themselves to be… and that the Phoenix isn't as safe with them as they'd like to think they are.

Maybe the two of them communicate off radar- Phoenix chasing after Zoraxis' tail while Vitti watches from the sidelines- breaching their coms to say her piece… Maybe the handler gives a piece of advice that Vitti contradicts, with her's being the safer option… Quietly worming the idea into the agent's head that even their own handler may not always have their best interest in mind… Whether or not there's any member of the Agency they can actually trust.

At the end of the day, Zor wants to tear apart every last facet of the Agency. But, they have a rival's fondness for the Phoenix… If they join Zoraxis, they'll be spared. They'll survive. If they stay with the Agency, they'll inevitably burn with the rest of them. She made her choice a long time ago… and she expects the agent to choose correctly.

I Expect You To Die; World in Your Hands

I don't care if it isn't likely I would do ANYTHING for a mind control arc (or something similar, at least), where we play as a Phoenix who- one way or another- has become a Zoraxis operative. It doesn't need to make sense while it happens because it would be fun as shit.

It isn't as if Phoenix still doesn't get to leave a trail of fiery destruction in their wake, it just isn't to the detriment of Zor this go around… Instead of the handler in your ear (🙁 no jared mason…) you can have one of the Zoraxis Operatives- either a new one, or a rotating cast of old ones (😊 yay mela lee). The souvenirs you bring back being exceedingly dangerous contraptions, explosives, prototype weaponry, and of course, many, many Zoraxis brand foodstuffs of varying degrees of quality. AND it would give Schell an excuse to bring back things like genuine gun combat from the first game.

And you get to be evil. Which literally who doesn't want to be evil?? Hello? We can get an epic evil cinematic intro and everything? An encounter with the handler where his voice shakes in genuine fear- for his life, for who his agent has become, for what Zor has done to them- HELLO??

[lunacornfan2k25]

Zor: “I expect you to die”

Juniper: “I don’t expect you to understand. I expect you t— well, frankly I expect you to find a way out. But you’ll be too late!”

Phantom, in code: I expect you to live

[blueorchid-95]

Sliding in here to say that I don’t think Reginald has actually been Lead Support Agent for all that long.

First off, the very fact that he ends up working as our handler should say something. At the start of the first game, we’re either a total novice agent or a fresh member of the EOD. Even if we did have experience working in the Agency before the TK implant, it seems unlikely that the Lead Support Agent of all people would settle down to work with us.

Maybe there wasn’t enough support agents available, and therefore Reginald had to become our Handler, you say? That does make sense… but according to the radio in IEYTD 3, the Agency has a surplus of new field agents coming in to help out in the EOD, enough that they “might run out of kinesium for TK implants.” This implies that there’s plenty of handlers set up to handle the sudden influx of field agents, as there’s never any mention of new support agents joining en masse. In turn, this tells us that there definitely was more than enough handlers back before Agent Phoenix became Agent Phoenix.

Second off, his photo in the post-mission rooms during IEYTD 3 tells us a lot too.

Just… look at it.

For comparison’s sake, here is Director Morales:

Most of the photos on the wall are similar in nature to Director Morales—calm and stoic. Yang Jinyi, the Head of Operations, is smiling, but still rather low-key. The only person who fully matches Reginald’s energy is Hank Jenkins, the Head of Public Relations.

But what is that energy? Why are Reginald and Hank smiling so hard in their photos compared to everyone else?

That’s easy. They’re nervous.

We’ve never heard of Hank before, but we all know the Handler. He’s good at his job, but he’s also incredibly anxious. If you’ve listened to the Operation: Jet Set song on IEYTD 2’s soundtrack, you’ve heard him stammer over himself trying to sound cool while addressing his favorite actor. “We’re, ahh, we’re the best in the business! The secret agent business—oh, uhhh…”

Reginald photo captures this energy masterfully. He mainly looks happy and excited, but when placed around all of the other photos, doesn’t it look like he’s trying too hard? Like he’s suddenly found himself on top and didn’t ever expect to?

Of course, there’s the party photo you can find in Roxana’s house. Reginald even refers to it as “a long time ago.” It shows him having a ball with Morales, Roxana, and the ever-mysterious V. Vitti in the back. So that should discredit this theory, right?

Nope! Because everyone in that photo looks the exact same as they do in their respective Agency Lead photograph. The banner above the four implies that they’re celebrating the invention of the TK implant, which seems to be a decently new tool for the Agency—the Handler implies that implants came into play after he left the field, and there’s no way to tell exactly how long it’s been since then—whether a few decades or a few years, it’s at least been long enough for our Handler to adjust to his new position. This fact can crunch our timeline considerably. If Reginald wanted to become Lead Support Agent, he’d have to make his way up through the ranks after he was promoted… which clearly could’ve been much later than we think.

Not to mention that the party photo also doesn’t present any information relative to their ranks in the company at the time. It simply shows a band of friends gathered together to celebrate an accomplishment, making it impossible to date as well. All we know is that it took place a while back.

It’s impossible to know exactly when Reginald became Lead Support Agent. But with this information in mind, it’s easy to believe he’s new to it.

[crazybunnyyy]

Esc 2024 contestants astrology natal personal placements

Joost klein- Scorpio sun. Pisces moon. Sagittarius mercury. Capricorn Venus. Capricorn mars. 

Kaleen- Scorpio sun. Pisces moon. Scorpio mercury. Scorpio venus. Leo mars. 

Iolanda- Scorpio sun. Scorpio moon.  Libra mercury. Scorpio venus. Leo mars. 

Mustii-  Scorpio sun. Capricorn moon. Sagittarius mercury. Sagittarius venus. Gemini mars 

Luna- Virgo sun. Pisces or Aries moon. Leo mercury. Leo venus. Scorpio mars. 

María Bas (from Nebulossa)-  Virgo sun. Cancer or leo moon. Libra mercury. Libra venus. Leo mars. 

Mark Dasousa (from Nebulossa)- Capricorn sun. Aries moon. Capricorn mercury. Aquarius venus. Taurus mars.

Slimane- Libra sun. Pisces or aries moon. Libra mercury. Sagittarius Venus. Libra mars. 

Windows95man- Leo sun. Scorpio moon. Leo mercury. Cancer venus. Leo mars.

Marina satti- Capricorn sun. Libra or Scorpio moon. Sagittarius mercury. Scorpio venus. Pisces mars. 

Angelina mango- Aries sun. Scorpio moon. Aries Mercury. Aries venus. Sagittarius mars.

Silvester belt- Sagittarius sun. Libra moon.  Sagittarius mercury. Capricorn venus. Capricorn mars. 

Tali- Sagittarius sun. Sagittarius moon. Scorpio Mercury. Capricorn venus. Libra mars.

Aiko- Capricorn sun. Leo moon. Sagittarius mercury. Scorpio venus. Aquarius mars. 

Bambie thug- Pisces sun. Leo moon. Pisces mercury. Aries venus. Cancer mars. 

It's interesting how Bambie was also born on the 6. Their birthday is March 6.

Baby lasagna- Cancer sun. Libra moon. Gemini mercury. Cancer Venus. Virgo Mars.

Nemo- Leo sun. Aries moon or Taurus moon. Cancer mercury. Virgo venus. Scorpio mars. 

Hera Björk- Aries sun. Virgo or libra moon.  Aries mercury. Taurus venus. Gemini mars. 

Dons- Aries sun. Cancer or leo moon.  Taurus mercury. Aries venus. Scorpio mars. 

Saba- Leo sun. Scorpio moon. Virgo mercury. Virgo venus. Libra mars.

Jaklin baghdasaryan (from Ladaniva)-  Taurus sun. Libra or Scorpio moon. Taurus mercury. Taurus venus. Virgo mars. 

Louis Thomas (from Ladaniva)- Aquarius sun. Libra or scorpio moon. Aquarius mercury. Sagittarius venus. Aries mars.

Zaachariaha Fielding (from Electric Fields)- Libra sun. Aquarius or pisces moon. Virgo mercury. Virgo venus. Gemini mars.

Michael Ross (from Electric Fields)- Sagittarius sun. Gemini moon. Sagittarius mercury. Aquarius venus. Virgo mars.

Olly Alexander - Cancer sun. Aries moon. Leo Mercury. Gemini venus. Taurus mars. 

Jerry heil- Libra sun. Libra moon. Libra mercury. Scorpio venus. Sagittarius mars.

Alyona alyona- Gemini sun. Cancer moon. Gemini mercury. Leo Venus. Leo mars.

Sarah bonnici- Gemini sun. Leo moon.  Taurus mercury. Taurus venus. Gemini mars. 

Nutsa Buzaladze- Aquarius sun. Virgo or libra moon. Capricorn mercury. Capricorn venus. Libra mars.

Raiven- Taurus sun. Leo moon. Taurus mercury. Gemini venus. Aries mars.

Silia kapsis- Sagittarius sun. Gemini moon.  Scorpio Mercury. Sagittarius venus. Scorpio mars. 

Besa- Gemini sun. Aquarius or pisces moon. Gemini mercury. Cancer venus. Capricorn mars.

Teya dora- Taurus sun. Aries or taurus moon. Aries mercury. Aries venus. Pisces mars.

Henri Piispanen- Gemini sun, Sagittarius or Capricorn moon.  Gemini mercury. Cancer venus. Taurus mars.

Gunnhild Sundli (from Gåte)- Cancer sun. Capricorn moon. Leo mercury. Taurus venus. Cancer mars.

John stenersen (from Gåte)- Taurus sun. Leo moon. Taurus mercury. Cancer venus. Gemini mars.

Jon evan Schärer (from Gåte)- Libra sun. Capricorn moon. Virgo mercury. Virgo venus. Gemini mars.

Magnus børmak (from Gåte)- Sagittarius sun. Pisces or Aries moon. Sagittarius mercury. Sagittarius venus. Capricorn mars.

Mats paulsen (from Gåte)- Pisces sun. Libra moon. Aquarius mercury. Aries venus. Aries mars.

Kenzy Loevett (from Megara)- Leo sun. Aquarius or Pisces moon. Leo mercury. Virgo venus. Gemini mars.

Vitti Crocutta (from Megara)- Taurus sun. Capricorn or Aquarius moon. Taurus mercury. Aries venus. Pisces mars

Tio rober bueno (from Megara)- Cancer sun. Scorpio moon. Leo mercury. Cancer venus. Scorpio mars.

Mihkel Tamm (from 5iimust and Puuluup)- Cancer sun. Libra moon. Cancer mercury. Leo venus. Leo mars.

Marko Veisson (from 5iimust and Puuluup)- Leo sun. Cancer moon. Leo mercury. Leo venus. Virgo mars.

Karl Kivastik (from 5iimust and Puuluup)- Leo sun. Aquarius moon. Leo mercury. Gemini venus. Aries mars.

Ramo Teder (from 5iimust and Puuluup)- Virgo sun. Pisces or aries moon. Virgo mercury. Scorpio venus. Virgo mars.

Kristjan Jakobson (from 5iimust and Puuluup)- Scorpio sun. Sagittarius moon. Scorpio mercury. Libra venus. Aries mars.

Priit Tomson (from 5iimust and Puuluup)- Aquarius sun. Pisces or aries moon. Aquarius mercury. Sagittarius venus. Aries mars.

Natalie barbu- Leo sun. Leo or virgo moon. Leo mercury. Leo venus. Cancer mars. 

Isaak-  Aquarius sun. Aquarius moon. Aquarius Mercury. Sagittarius venus. Leo mars.

It's kind of ironic how Isaak is an Aquarius stellium, the sign that's known to be unique/different when the first lyric in his Eurovision song is “I am nothing but the average”

Marcus & martinus- Pisces sun. Gemini moon. Aquarius mercury. Pisces venus. Aries mars.

[kayssweetdreams]

I'm just gonna throw it out there now.

V. Vitti is Zor.

If you turn 2 Vs to their side, then you get a Z.

[warriorend-2]

ok ok since i can't be stupid and gay all the time (<- college student)

putting this shit under a cut bc while it's mostly just me rambling it's. spoiler heavy. & also wound up being 1600 words. sorry

1: possibly the most glaring thing, which makes me doubt the Phantom being a lot of otherwise-possible candidates, is that they would have to be very good at infiltration

-I presume Roxana didn't put the medal in her computer herself, which means whoever did put it there had to get in after she left, get into the computer without waking up Robutler, modify it to put it there, & put everything back (mostly) the way it was & leave a combination. granted maybe they just gave the medal to Roxana to put in there, but like. why

-getting it into that spot in the mines wouldn't have been too hard i don't think, just. knowing where the mine is and then sneaking in during off-duty hours (...assuming those happen)

-tbh the one in blind spot is probably the easiest to place given that it's just behind a license plate, & cars do have to stop sometimes even if it's not often

-i'm. not sure how they got the medal into hot water though. i'm guessing they snuck it in among the materials? (the other option here is that Zor had a hand in getting it there, which opens up a whole other can of worms so i'm not gonna. think about that one too hard)

-the one in cold shoulder is also not too hard to see it getting there. i would laugh if they had to make a mold of that little compartment & then make a block of ice for it though.

-the one in kboom is where i'm like. OK this facility is presumably not super new but it's also not super old given its current purpose. it may have been repurposed but still. how did they get the medal where it is and then also tag the bucket. the volcano doesn't look like it's horribly far away from shore (in the ending credits) but (also i'm aware the medal shouldn't even be able to be where it is but. yknow.)

and odds are that it doesn't matter that much, i'm just. they had a little safe set up in the control point already, they had access to the pneumatic tubes, etc. if the locations have any bearing and aren't just "here's somewhere to stick this puzzle that would be hard to figure out", then that implies some Shit about the phantom (& possibly also their allies. if they have any. if they do I highly doubt they're Agency-related.). given where the phantom gets to i am somewhat leaning towards the idea it may be V. Vitti (also the. insignia), given that we've seen the sort of places Agent Phoenix gets into (...seat of power) & so

2: Zor's goals feel a lot more on a personal bent this game, not just irt destroying the Agency but also. destroying the kinesium & anything that uses it. so whatever their reason, it seems to be a lot more personal (+ they actively Address the player more often, which could be Phoenix's infamy but also in the other games they were barely present, both in terms of voicelines & actual like. Story Push. they were a very passive supervillain in the other games, is what i'm saying)

which leads me up to like. we all know characters can lie, & in this series it's kinda expected, but. idk. i keep circling back to the shield generator. & the lava generators being accessible from Phoenix's cabin, but not the one Roxana was in. & Phoenix's cabin seemingly having all this shit that the others didn't have, & it could have been a tactical choice on Phoenix's part, but.

i mean. Zor does definitely say they want you dead, but they don't say it directly a whole lot (iirc they say "kill you and Prism" but otherwise they don't directly address the player in death threats, it's usually just. agents, plural. or "whatever end you meet" which is also a threat but is vague)

which just. why is Agent Phoenix still alive? Game design aside, of course. It wouldn't be much of a game if the villain kills you in the first level, after all.

But it feels, to me, like the weaknesses are far too glaring to be just missed over, especially in 3, because. if they want you dead that badly, why. why leave things so safe?

Hot Water is one i wind up on a lot, because you could chalk things up to being deathtraps, but Ollie knew about the gas and the grenade trap, & seemed completely unfazed by them (& kinda implied that's just How It Is for new folks), so they're not necessarily targeted, it's just standard practice. Putting aside the fact that even if they were intended to be deathtraps, they're so. Mild. to put it bluntly. Zor knows Phoenix by this point, knows the shit they've pulled & survived, a gas trap & a grenade in a vending machine feel very. yknow. that's like throwing a rock at the back of someone's head, comparatively

and then the KBOOM demo & the shield generator, both explicitly left for you to see. & it's a pretty 1-to-1 comparison for how the actual KBOOM mission goes, except for the telekinesis save at the end. the squid gets involved, but for the most part, considering it's a lab Zor loosely implies they were at, the security is very. lax. & everything is accessible to the "new hire", popsicle-ID necessity aside. (also apparently Ollie has been down there a while, given he doesn't seem to. know about the whole "world domination" thing. which is Eerie because if that's the case then how long exactly has the whole Kinesium thing been a plan?)

to me. & it has felt like this since the end of the second game. When Zor says they want you dead, there's a whole host of unstated conditions to that, which they would be good at given the whole CEO thing.

"I want you dead if you aren't good enough at your job to survive" sort of deal. which also lines in nicely with how they seem to be as an Actual Boss. of course, they never say the second part out loud, but. short of them just being Really Smart in a lot of cases (failsafe in Juniper's mask, leading Roxana along long enough to get her research & then trying to kill her, etc) but Really Dumb in others (leaving the shield generator, making the squid the only real danger to Phoenix down there, not having any failsafes to make sure the missiles launch at the end of 2 even if the briefcase is compromised (or just not using them), etc), it's like. the ways their plans get foiled at the end of 2 & 3 feels intentional.

plus you could make the argument that Roxana was also being used to lead Phoenix along until they were where Zor wanted them, at which point both of what they were using her for (Kinesium research, kite Phoenix around until they're in position, even if that second one wasn't in the deal) was done & they could get rid of her without feeling bad.

would stopping KBOOM have been possible without Roxana's help? Dunno. Not the way it's presented in-game, because in-game she was also instrumental to stopping it.

i'm also going to briefly play semantics for a second. i'm not sure i consider "even the great Agent Phoenix will eventually burn out" to be a threat because. that's what phoenixes do. They burn, and then they come back. Sometimes it takes a while, but. if i'm not just thinking about semantics Way Too Hard, the wording of "burn out" suggests something far different than "die". combining that with Zor talking about the Agency like That, & the Phantom (at least vaguely) implying prior experience with the Agency, & realizing that their involvement would cost them their life, makes me think. maybe "burn out" isn't a threat of death, but a threat of something about Phoenix changing soon. Maybe as a result of almost dying. "burn out" is also used for like. becoming exhausted, stopping trying, & maybe that too. who knows. i don't, i'm not on the dev team, i'm just some 21 year old chewing on semantics.

at the end of the day, my current standing on Theories is. hard to sum up but i will do my best. o7

-The phantom is probably one of a very small handful of candidates, & I'm leaning towards it being V. Vitti or maybe possibly Zor in a funny hat.

-Zor is trying to kill Phoenix, but not inescapably. maybe they're testing Phoenix, maybe they're just trying to almost-kill Phoenix enough times they get tired of the Agency and fuck off so Zor can do the whole "world domination" thing (which i am not. wholly convinced they actually are after.)

-summing those two up made me think of something else. perhaps the Phantom was also testing Phoenix in a roundabout way, by seeing if they could survive everything else, because they only show up in the third game. Their note opening with "it seems you're as good as they say" indicates they are at least familiar with Phoenix & their reputation, albeit maybe not directly (if it is Vitti, i doubt she would have access to Agency knowledge, but post-Rising Phoenix, once the rumors started getting out...)

-this is a silly theory i like to throw around in my head, but i'm very fond of it, so: the "death room" you go to after dying in a mission may not necessarily always indicate Actual Death. in some cases, yes, but in other cases. idk. i've always gotten more the vibe of having been captured as opposed to outright killed (although being able to respawn does throw a wrench in there, but oh well. game has to be a game & all)

[definitelyunhingedagentphoenix]

Question, was talking with friends who also like ieytd so I thought I should also try and get your opinion, who do you think the phantom is? Like do think they are a whole new character, an already seen character, because I have my theory that the phantom could be V. Vitti, the top field agent whom we see in Ieytd 1 and 3, from portrait.

So I agree with you 100% and because I just put out a really long post on a different person's post I'm just going to copy and paste what I wrote there here under the cut so people who have already read it don't need to read it again. I totally forgot their name though when I wrote it so it is supposed to be V. Vitti

So my running theory at the moment is that dr. Zor is that person from the photographs in the office after you finish a mission in I expect you to die three. You know how there are five portraits on the wall and a missing space for the sixth one but then you find the sixth one in the plant on the other side of the room? Obviously that has to mean something right? And I can't remember their exact title but basically it's the top agent in the EOD.

In the third game during project KBOOM when Zor is addressing the agent they say something along the lines of "there's nothing in the agency worth saving. I would know." Which seems to allude to the fact that they have a more in-depth knowledge of the agency then someone who has always been opposing them. So what if they saw something during one of their missions as an EOD agent or were asked/told to do something that was truly despicable by the agency itself. After that they turned their back on the agency and left with a pretty sour taste in their mouth. Probably a deep hatred of the agency and all of the high ranking members that they had probably considered friends at some point.

I would even argue that they probably faked their own death to remain anonymous because at no point in time does Handler even speak about them let alone talk about them in a negative light. If the pain of the death was still hurting him he probably wouldn't bring it up. That would also kind of explain why that person's photo was still in the office and not in the trash can, but was not hung up either. Whoever was taking it down was probably doing so because that person was no longer with the agency but they were distraught about it. Then whatever happened to that particular headquarters, happened, and they just dropped the photo. Based on the moldy sandwich still sitting on the plate when we first arrived there before the opening song, it seems like everyone left in quite the hurry.

I could even paint a sadder picture here because imagine if the reason for all of that was that Dr. Zor showed up and killed all of the agents that were there. Maybe Dr. Zor, seeing themself still memorialized on that wall sent them into a rage and they threw the painting.

So then picture, a new agent arrives that at first seems like any typical agent that the EOD has. But then they do something remarkable. They kill commander Solaris and destroy the death engine. Performing extreme feats of both self-preservation and lack of self-preservation. No person in the right mind no matter the training would send themselves up in a commandeered space shuttle from their enemy in order to destroy something that they knew would get them killed. And at first it's just another agent gone and a failed mission for Zor.

But then Juniper later tells Zor that the agent has resurfaced. Ever one for the arts, he's already named them Agent Phoenix seeing as they have risen from the ashes. They are alive and once again performing amazing feats that no other agent (well... Other than Zor themself) have ever performed. That's when Zor begins to take a personal interest. They begin to follow the agent and see what makes them tick. That's why Zor wanted John Juniper to film the agent once they actually had them captured. It's not because they actually believed that the phoenix would die, even John Juniper didn't believe that Agent Phoenix was going to die there so why would Zor?

To put it simply, it's because they want Agent Phoenix to live. They want to see how they escape. They want to see how their mind works. Zor sees a potential in Agent Phoenix that people in the EOD used to see in them. A true ambition and drive to do what they believe is right. And not only that but the willingness to put themself on the line for that very goal, not caring what the consequences of their actions are as long as the greater good still benefits.

Zor knows that Agent Phoenix survives after the whole incident with John Juniper. It wasn't just the EOD that was looking for a body there. And Zor had a pretty solid gut feeling that Agent Phoenix would have survived regardless. When no body is discovered they know that Agent Phoenix will be back and where is the most likely place they'll go? A EOD safe house that's not too far from the Zoraxis building. The very same one where they threw away their own picture.

They get there and of course scope out the place to make sure that Agent Phoenix isn't currently in the building. Remarkably, they've healed from their injuries quite quickly and are already back on another case. A perfect time to set up a little scavenger hunt of sorts. A medal. One in every place that they know Agent Phoenix is about to be in. They give one to Roxana and tell her to hide it but not well enough that Agent Phoenix won't find it. Of course they don't actually tell her the reasoning behind it but they know Agent Phoenix will find it. They hide one in many places with little hints and clues on how to find them. Even in their underwater lab they make a little stencil that agent Phoenix could put on the chalkboard to find out the code that will BRING THEM THE MEDAL. Zor was even there very recently if their personal message to Agent Phoenix is anything to go by. Ollie has been down there long enough to run out of food, be starving, and not know that Zor was outed as a supervillain but there just so happens to be a tape labeled "Phoenix" that was recorded by Zor themself, referencing the Juniper incident? Ollie didn't bring all that down there. Zor was down there setting this all up.

In that same mission, we learn of the secret code symbols that Zor is using. When you collect all the phantom medals, what do you find? A set of gloves which are suspiciously gold (a colour that's associated with both the EOD and Zoraxis) and the letter addressed to the Phoenix once again that has the same encrypted symbols that once deciphered read "I expect you to live."

ZOR expects them to live.

Zor WANTS them to live.

Agent Phoenix isn't just an adversary that Zor finds amusing. They see potential. That's why the entire note reads:

It seems you're as good as they say, Phoenix. They used to say I was good, too. But I made a choice. And before they get you killed, I hope you realize you have the same choice: to die or to live.

I expect you to live.

Zor has lived through this before. THEY were the EOD's best agent and they made the choice to leave for one reason or another. They've seen something in the EOD that caused them to do what they've done. That's why there's "nothing in the agency worth saving" because they DO KNOW. They've seen the agency's true colours. And now that they've seen Agent Phoenix... They were kind of right. There's only ONE thing in the agency worth saving and that's Agent Phoenix.

My prediction is that we are going to meet Zor in the next game but they're going to be introduced to us as this other agent. Maybe Handler has caught word that this person is still alive and he sends us to get them back; not unlike what he expected us to do with Roxana in the first mission of 3. But the twist is that this person is Zor and they are trying to convince Phoenix that they should join them. That they belong in Zoraxis. Maybe they even belong as Zor's partner.

Side note. I bet those gloves that this mysterious phantom leaves for the Phoenix is the pair that the EOD gave them when they were promoted to their role as one of the top 6. That's why they left them there for Phoenix. And also explains their association with Gold. Not to mention that the EOD symbol is very present throughout Zoraxis. There are loads of EOD logo's hidden around. It's even on the flooring if you die on a mission in 3 which could just be there for show but considering every other item in the room is branded with the Zoraxis logo... It feels too suspicious.

[kl-writes]

IEYTD Phantom/Zor/V. Vitti Theory

Spoilers abound for IEYTD 3.

Who is the Phantom and why do they use Zor's code?

We know the following about the Phantom:

They used to be associated with the agency, but quit before the agency could "get them killed" (implying that they dislike the agency or its methods)

They have either the skills or access to go to every mission location, and the Handler seems to think it's the former

They use the same cipher as Zor

They want Phoenix to live (final cipher is "I expect you to live")

We know the following about Zor:

They keep trying to take over the world, and don't care about casualties

They seem to want Phoenix to die, but often leave things open for Phoenix to escape (commented on by Juniper who wanted to just shoot Phoenix)

They use the same cipher as Phantom

They imply that they know something about the agency that Phoenix doesn't. This implies either a history with the agency predating their attempts to take over the world, or some sort of double-agent in the agency feeding them information

Although left uncertain, Zor is most likely a woman

They want to make Spanish class mandatory

Every single Zor operative has an American background. This could just be because Schell Games is an american company, but even the Fabricator and Solaris explicitly have dual-citizenship (this is according to https://iexpectyoutodie.schellgames.com/page-locked/login?ref=https%3A//iexpectyoutodie.schellgames.com/shawnsdesk -

password: that`sTHEpASscOdEx

Handler notes at one point that Zor is behind just about every nasty plot the agency has foiled (he says "we", so this could just refer to Phoenix's missions)

Their handedness is uncertain. The portrait of the hand holding the globe in "Winter Break" (first game) is left handed. The hand holding the snow globe is also a left hand in "Cold Shoulder" (third game). However, the data sphere override hand is a right hand, and in "Seat of Power," there are buttons on both armrests, but the emergency evac buttons are on the right.

We know the following about V. Vitti:

She used to be a field agent at the agency

Her photo is in Dr. Prism's office. She seems to not quite be part of the group, though she doesn't seem unhappy. This photo also shows that she knows the Handler, Director Morales, and Dr. Prism

She is most likely right-handed (she holds a wine glass in her right hand in the photo)

Her portrait is in Zor's office. This is just of her face, and she's smiling.

I don't think the Phantom could have picked up Zor's cipher just from looking at the items in the fourth mission. Although you can decode the Phantom's message partially using the cipher and brute-force it from there, the Phantom uses symbols not seen in the fourth mission. Because of this, I think the Phantom already knows the full cipher. Therefore, the Phantom either is Zor, is part of Zoraxis, or is otherwise affiliated with Zor.

I don't think Zor is the Phantom because Zor pretty clearly wants you dead. It's true that they leave different ways out for you to escape, so maybe they're only 99% on board with you dying (prefers you to suffer), but they do not "expect you to live" like the Phantom does. Additionally, even if they had some sort of change of heart post-game, the safe and letter were set up before Phoenix arrived at Babadag (and before anyone discovered that Phoenix had cheated death again).

I don't think any of the Zoraxis folks we know could be the Phantom either, including Juniper. All of them want you dead. Maybe Ollie could be the Phantom, but if that's the case, then Ollie is almost certainly a made up name. He could even be masking his voice since we never actually see him.

I know Juniper=Phantom is a popular theory, but without the mimic mask I do not think Juniper has the skills (and no longer has the access) to get to every mission location. First of all, it would be very difficult for him to get to Babadag before Phoenix and set up the safe with custom keys (not to mention, he'd have to both anticipate which hideout Phoenix was going to and discover the location of that secret hideout). Additionally, although I could see Juniper teaming up with the agency to get revenge on Zor or the Fabricator, I don't see why he would "Expect you to live." Granted, he did expect us to escape the death trap, but the message from the Phantom is more of a plea for us to leave the agency to save ourselves. If Juniper wants allies to take down Zor, this is counterintuitive to his goals. Finally, Juniper did not have any history whatsoever with the agency: if this were the case, the Handler would know about it.

Additionally, the Handler specifically refers to the Phantom's skills being why they could show up at every location, rather than any access they might have due to Zoraxis affiliation. However, the Handler's been wrong about whether or not people are part of Zoraxis in the past (such as with Juniper).

So, my thoughts are that the Phantom is someone who is acquainted with both Zoraxis and the Agency.

This is a bit of a gut feeling, but I don't think Zor is V. Vitti. This is based on the portrait in Zor's office: for one, I don't think Zor would keep a portrait of themself laying around for agents to find. Second, it doesn't really seem like an ego-driven portrait. If you look at self-portraits of generals, dictators, and so on, they all try to exude power or status. That's not the feel I get from that portrait. This portrait seems warmer, more like a family member of romantic interest. Additionally, people don't put up pictures of people they don't respect. Also, I get the feeling that the Handler would have commented on the picture if they didn't expect to see V. Vitti's picture in Zor's office.

A bit of a silly one, I don't see why V. Vitti would want Spanish class to be mandatory, since Vitti is an italian name. Based on what we know about Zor, he's either from the United States or from Spain. Given the US's horrible track record with latino immigrants, I could see a world where an american Zor wants to turn the tables and make Spanish mandatory. I could also see a world where a spanish Zor wants to reassert Spain's dominance over the world, because ego. I don't see a world where an italian or italian-american Zor wants to make Spanish mandatory. (Granted, the whole spanish class/spain thing could be an elaborate ruse by Zor to obscure their identity.)

So, via process of elimination, I think V. Vitti is the Phantom. I believe that she worked for the agency for some time, possibly even fighting against Zor. For some reason, V. Vitti and Zor became friendly with one another. Either Zor divulged the dark secrets they knew about the agency to V. Vitti, or V. Vitti discovered some dark secrets and shared them with Zor. They became friendly or romantic with one another (or perhaps discovered that they were related- brother's cousin's mother's ex-roommate, etc.). It's possible that Zor's code is what they used to communicate.

They do not have the same goals, since the Phantom is not currently working with Zoraxis. In fact, I'd bet that V. Vitti is presumed dead by both Zor and the Agency (with this possibly occurring after the agency discovered said relationship- hence why the portrait of V. Vitti in the briefing room is thrown in the plant and not on the wall).

Of course, this is still just a theory hanging on a gut feeling about a portrait in the first game. It's entirely possible that we do not yet have enough information to determine who the Phantom, Zor, and V. Vitti really are. And maybe Juniper did have some dark history with the agency that has yet to be discovered (Was he a triple agent, perhaps?) Or maybe Zor and the Phantom are the same person, and Zor's simply changed their mind on whether or not he wants Phoenix to die (and he's decided that it might be easier to manipulate them into quitting).

[carverl]

Throwing my hat in the ring with the whole Phantom, V Vitti, Zor connection;

I feel that Vitti was definitely someone close to Zor, hence why they keep their portrait as well as an Agency lighter in their safe. Vitti disappearing and Zor blaming the EOD for it is the most compelling answer to me and it explains Zor's initial interest turned malicious obsession with Pheonix as they feel like Pheonix is an insult to Vitti's memory.

Feel like in either the next game, we're going to get betrayed by the Agency, with what Vitti said, I'm 100% certain that they're super shady

[lunacornfan2k25]

🥪 Tell us any random headcanon/s you have?

Most of my head canons end up in my writing but there are a few that are just floating around…

1) Kinesium comes from space

Since kinesium was found around iron, nickel, and hydrosulfuric acid, I think kinesium started out as a iron-nickel alloy that was kit be a meteor that trapped/had trapped H2S within it and brought the element that makes kinesium special that was substituted into the alloy.

Why were there aliens in Russia? Because Russia has the biggest kinesium deposit and the aliens use it/wanted it

(I put way to much irl chemical analysis to kinesium to a game with a very different periodic table)

2) John Juniper is the Phantom

This is largely wishful thinking but I think he’s the only character unaccounted for that knows both Agent Phoenix and Zoraxis well enough to get the tokens in their hiding places and predict our behavior (he could also be working with V Vitti)

3) Zoraxis’s main goal is to be evil and all the business stuff is secondary

It’s why all of their products that were advertised to us are dangerous/shitty. The world leaders didn’t trust Zoraxis for a reason

4) Zor collects the lighters of the agents that have been defeated by Zoraxis

This one was mentioned in passing in the latest entry to the celebrity crush series but I think that’s why they have so many EOD lighters. They were never part of the agency

[nickvitti]

Blog 3- Nicholas Vitti

The Director- Australian Horror Movie

Jennifer Kent

Video Interview (Great Video!!!)- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pAKZb1MNaZY

Critical Evaluation- https://www.indiewire.com/criticism/culture/review-jennifer-kents-inventive-dark-and-psychotic-horror-the-babadook-269782/

2 Reviews- 

2 Videos-

Clip from The Babadook (Reading Mr. Babadook for the first time) (Letting it in)-

Blog 3-

Jennifer Kent who is one of the most famous Australian horror movie directors if not the most famous one of all time was born in Brisbane, Australia. While watching some of her movies as well as some of her interviews it was clear to me that she was not as dark as some of the films she has made. Her two most notable films would be The Babadook and The Nightingale. Both of these were released within the last 10 years with The Babadook released in 2014 and The Nightingale released in 2019. Based on reviews it was clear that The Babadook was the favorite and most popular out of the two and perhaps one of the most famous Australian horror movies to date in regards to certain sources and opinions. 

Kent is a very down-to-earth person that likes to find her inspiration from a number of other films and directors as well as herself. She will sit on ideas for years as nothing just random;y comes to her and she will combine a bunch of ideas throughout a period of time until she essentially gets the central idea and plot that she likes. She is very creative as she uses many different cinematic experiences such as playing along with different lighting, for example here would be the difference between The Babadook as well as The Nightingale. In The Babadook the lighting was darker and did rely on certain famous sounds while The Nightingale’s lighting was displayed through candlelight when the characters were inside and natural light when they were outside. The difference between the two makes her have a unique way of creating an image for viewers.

She focuses on the camera angles as well as sound. She explained in a famous interview that she likes to focus on negative space as this results in “whether a viewer thinks it or not” making them feel uneasy. This I can agree with as The Babadook for example, I felt messed with my mind more than it scared me. She thinks the camera was a way to embrace an audience. She thinks that the different angles can provide a more scared and uneasy effect on the audience.

Overall, I think that Jennifer Kent is the most notable and famous Australian horror director that the genre has to offer. Her unique thinking about horror and the way she goes about things in her films has earned her this popularity through her peers as well as through her popular movies. She likes to play with sound and lighting as her horror in contrast to other directors leaning towards a more jumpscare type of approach. I like how she does this and it provides for a more wholesome and interesting effect as she psychologically messes with your brain as a pose to just scare viewers. 

Pictures-

[c-rox-sprites]

Could you do a panel edit or something with your take of a Roxy Pyrope? I'm trying to figure out what I looked like so go wild wirh ideas! - Ro Pyro

im always up to help a fellow rox! i also once again dont know how to do swaps so i hope i did this right kjsdkfjshdfkjsdhkj

-C. Rox.

[onwacollective]

Womb Healing Masterpost

 Please share far and wide.

With the increase of hormonal imbalance as a result of the collective being fed constant cycles of stress through the media, I’ve felt called to organize info that’s been useful to me on healing the womb and healing hormonal imbalance. While menstruation pain has been normalized, it is not natural to regularly be in pain during your cycle. Consistently painful cycles are the body’s way of communicating that something is wrong and that the womb needs attention.  I’ve provided some tools below to help.

I’ve broken the info up into three categories: energetic, physical, and gut health. I’ve found it to be true that womb related issues are always energetic first. Fixing the physical issue without addressing the emotional/energetic wounding will cause the illness to manifest in the body in another way. The physical category focuses on how to address womb imbalance by making changes to diet and behavior. The gut health category is gut specific healing because many hormones are created in the gut or called into creation by the gut microbiome. If you have hormonal issues it’s likely you have gut health issues as well.

The most important element of healing your womb is discernment. Use your discernment when moving through this information. Some things will be helpful and relevant to you and some will not. Everyone’s body is unique. Honor that on your journey to healing.

**note: some of these resources advise restrictive dieting (example vegan, low/no carb or otherwise) to heal the womb. While using these diets to detox for a little while may be beneficial, I’ve personally found restrictive diets to be more damaging long term. I’ve found the most benefit from prometabolic eating or eating ancestrally.  With any dietary info provided in these resources, use your discernment and prioritize listening to your body’s unique needs.**

Energetic

VIDEOS

Caroline Myss: Why People Don't Heal

The Truth About Uterine Fibroids In Melanin Dominant Women (Black Women) - Dr. Jewel Pookrum

5 Mindset Shifts That Have Completely Transformed My Health Journey

PODCASTS

S3E07. HOW TO GIVE YOUR BODY A “SOFTWARE UPDATE” - the art of updating your physical body on emotional breakthroughs for better lymphatic drainage, emotional release, and brain-body connection w/ Julie Tracy

BOOKS

You Look Like Something Blooming: A Memoir of Divination Seeds to Cultivate Your Feminine Garden Temple by India Ame’ye (you can also check out India’s tumblr HERE)

Sacred Woman: A Guide to Healing the Feminine Body, Mind, and Spirit by Queen Afua

Set Boundaries, Find Peace by Nedra Glover Tawwab

Physical

VIDEOS

HOW TO V STEAM AT HOME | DIY Yoni Steam

The Goddess Collection aka KrystalTheHealthAdvocate YouTube Channel

DIY Castor Oil Pack Tutorial | How to Castor Oil Pack for Fertility, Fibroids and Liver Health

BOOKS

In the FLO: Unlock Your Hormonal Advantage and Revolutionize Your Life by Alisa Vitti

Hormone Intelligence by Aviva Romm, MD

PODCASTS

S3E02. FROM WELLNESS EXTREMES TO A HEALTHY FOUNDATION - why getting back to basics, saying no to fads and fueling our bodies is the medicine women need with Nina Passero, FDN-P

S3E05. BEYOND BIRTH CONTROL - tracking your menstrual cycle, reproductive empowerment + ways to take control of your fertility and health with Lisa Hendrickson-Jack

S2E12. PCOS: WHY ARE SO MANY WOMEN SUFFERING? - a conversation about carbs, body temperature, metabolism, stress and phone addiction with Amanda Montalvo, RD, FDN-P

S2E2. WHY HORMONE IMBALANCE IS ON THE RISE - Dr. Aviva Romm shares tangible solutions for endo and PCOS

BLOGS/INSTAS/WEBSITES

What is Yoni Steaming?

Herbal Tea Nourishment - https://thealkalinegoddess.com

@thegoddescollection on insta

@JessicaAshWellness on insta

https://www.jessicaashwellness.com/

Gut Health

BOOKS

Gut and Psychology Syndrome: Natural Treatment for Autism, Dyspraxia, A.D.D., Dyslexia, A.D.H.D., Depression, Schizophrenia by Dr. Natasha Campbell-McBride

Glucose Revolution: The Life-Changing Power of Balancing Your Blood Sugar by Jessie Inchauspe

BLOGS/INSTAS/WEBSITES

@GlucoseGoddess on Instagram

@JessicaAshWellness on insta

How to make your own Saurkraut

How (and why) to do an Enema

PODCASTS

S2E13. THE LIVER GUT CONNECTION - Dr. Asia Muhammad on why fatty liver is exploding, leaky gut, and the root of most health concerns

APPS

Monash University FODMAP diet (for locating food sensitivities)

I’ll add to this list as I continue to find and remember resources that have been supportive. If we let it, womb healing can be a beautiful initiation into feminine power. Be gentle with yourself 💗

[thejewofkansas]

The Weekly Gravy #4

The End of August at the Hotel Ozone/Konec srpna v Hotelu Ozon (1967) – ***

Also known as Late August at the Hotel Ozone.

I might not have ever heard of this film if it weren’t for my friend Ethan, who tipped me off after he discovered it himself. I was lucky enough to find a copy in the wild not long after, but didn’t get around to watching it until last night (as I write this); I was…

[spaghettificationandpretzels]

Rest Your Weary Hands Part 19

I said that chapters would be longer but out less often, this one is on the shorter end of that but I didn't want to leave anyone waiting for more than a week for each new chapter. I kinda feel like this was a nothing filler chapter, maybe it's because I've been at it for 8 days.

Part 18

Series Masterlist

Contains: Fluff, smut (oral sex F and M reviving, P in V, CONSENT)

3,228 Words

Comment if you want to be tagged

Queen Aslaug walks into your little Healers store with one request, help her son. Said to be blessed by the gods, you find your life becoming more and more intertwined with the young prince as you do your best to ease his pain. It will soon be apparent that outside forces have other ideas.

"It's time for the feast!" Of course Hvitserk would bring up the food.

The brothers all stood in a line, ready for the wedding race. With a blast from Floki's horn, they were off, pushing each other aside while they leapt, dodged and swerved.

Sigurd reached the finish line first, crossing then throwing his arms up in the air in celebration, then Bjorn, then Ubbe. With Hvitserk's food falling just behind Ubbe's, he slumped over in defeat before going to collect the jug of honey meed.

"Well brother, you did make all the food. Why shouldn't you serve it too." You reached over and thumped Ubbe on the chest, "and Ivar and I are very grateful for that, I'm happy Hvitserk cooked for us. Don't be bitter because you couldn't put some meat on a bit of bread."

Hvitserk clearly heard you because he turned around to face his brother with a righteous smile on his face, "see brother, that's why she's the favourite."

"Boys, no more fighting. I would like to enjoy the rest of my wedding celebration without someone ending up rolling around in the mud."

The feast started in earnest right away, there was one very long table that everyone was sitting at, with you and Ivar at the top and Aslaug and Lagertha at the head of the other end. Hvitserk was running back and forth with food and drink, stopping every now and then to take a bite of something or a sip of meed.

"Vitty, please sit down. You've done plently. I want you to enjoy the night as well." He smiled at you, pouring you one more drink before sitting down next to Kindra.

Food and drink were flying in every direction, not a minute went by without someone reaching over another person to share something. There was an air of ruckus laughter and genuine affection, and various stories were being shared up and down the table.

The tap of a metal cup signified that it was time for speeches, Bjorn got up first, clambering over half-drunk to the podium.

"I find it both funny and endearing that the youngest of Aslaug's sons was the first to marry. It proves that love and marriage have no timeline, that when love finds us, we have to grab it with both hands." There was a cheer and Bjorn stepped down to allow his mother to have her turn.

"We will all have struggles throughout our lives, sickness, war, death and loss, but each of those is made easy if we have the person the Gods created for us. I believe that Ivar and y/n have found that with each other and that the Gods have truly blessed them."

As Lagertha got down, Ubbe ran up, with a smile on his face, he said one sentence, "I was right, you must name your first born son after me." There was a roar of laughter and Ivar pulled Ubbe into a hug as he walked but to his seat.

Hvitserk stood up from his seat, not bothering to move. "Speaking of blessing, the Gods are going to bless me with a child." Another burst of cheers. Leif's voice boomed across the table "may the gods bless you with daughters."

The rest of the feast went on much the same, with different people giving speeches and toasts. Floki's was a giggled love fest that ended with most people in tears of joy and the Blacksmith's story about love being like the strongest steal was well-meaning if not a little confusing.

Aslaug got up last, standing tall at the head of the table.

"With all this wonderful news, I thought it would be time to announce some of my own. One of my sons has just been wedded and another is expecting a child by winter's end. After much thought and prayer, I have decided to step down as Queen to allow my late husband's sons to take their place on the throne." There was silence.

"This doesn't mean anything will change, Ragnar's sons want the peace and prosperity we have brought to stay. In fact, it means you will have five people to hear your concerns and worries, this is a good thing for all of us." It started with a soft clap and grew to a thunder.

"LONG LIVE THE SONS OF RAGNAR."

After another round of food and drink, Ivar took your hand and stood up, "as much as my wife and I would like to spend the whole night drinking. We have a wedding bed to break in."

Another cheer and Ivar bent down to kiss you triumphally, "come now wife, we have a marriage to consummate."

*****************************************************************

You and Ivar stumbled back to your room, between pulling each other into kisses and the utter joy you both felt, it was hard to walk straight. "Are you ready for the rest of our lives wife?" You smiled at him, brushing your lips over his neck, "with every part of me husband."

Once you got to your bedroom, Ivar was already pulling off your dress. "you must wear this dress whenever you get the chance, it almost looks as good on you as it's going to look on the floor."

You giggled, gripping his chin in your hand, "we're married now. You don't need to charm me." Ivar put on a tone of mock seriousness, "if I ever stop trying to charm you, stab me."

Kissing the side of his face, you reached up to begin to unlace your dress but Ivar stopped you, "let me." You dropped your hand and Ivar ran his hand up your body along your shoulders and to the lacing at your neck.

You let the dress open and Ivar's hands slid under the loosening fabric and off your body, his eye raking over your skin as it was revealed to his eyes.

"You are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, when Freya looks at you, she cries in shame." Ivar's eyes were slightly wet and he was looking down at you in wonder, "oh Ivar, I don't deserve you."

He leaned down and kissed you, slow and deep, pulling away to brush his fingers over the freckles on your cheek, "oh no, it is I who doesn't deserve you. I swear on my arm ring that I will spend the rest of my life trying to be worthy of your love."

Your hands went to the tie on his pants while he took half a step back to remove his shirt. Guiding him to sit down on the end of the bed, you knelt down and removed his braces, then his pants, kissing up his legs, to his torso.

"You are so attractive it causes me actual pain, how dear husband am I ever meant to thank the Gods for all they have given me?" you reached his face, holding his head with both your hands.

"My Husband." You kissed his cheek, then his forehead, then the side of his face, and finally, his lips.

Ivar pressed his forehead against your, "my Wife." He repeated the same pattern, once he reached your lips, he fell back onto the bed, pulling you with him. You went willingly, slipping off your undergarments as you fell against him.

He paused, pulling your hand away and to his lips, kissing the meat of your palm, "we have our whole lives ahead of us wife, there's no need to rush."

You smiled at him, a mix of mischief and joy, "oh really? I'm going to make you regret that." His eyes went wide and he mirrored your smile, "do your worst."

You started slow, pushing him back so he was lying flat and began to kiss down his body. He thought you were going to go right to his cock but you bypassed it to press kisses along his legs.

As you kissed back up his body, you dodged his prick again, choosing to move to his chest. You lick then suck a nipple, Ivar's hand coming up to grab your head, he didn't press or shove, he just rested his hand on you.

You kept kissing up and down his body until his cock was red, angry and weeping, "that's not what I meant y/n and you know it." You smiled up at him, and the hand on your head became a little more forceful. You finally kissed your way to kiss cock, pecking it up, down and back again before putting the head in your mouth.

"That's it little wife, good girl." You went slowly again and Ivar's gratitude soon turned to frustration, before you knew it, he was hauling you up by your armpits, his arms rippling with strength.

"You are testing my patience y/n. Now, you are going to lay back and let me enjoy you or I will tie you up and you won't be getting out of the bed until I say you can." You smiled at him, making sure he knew you weren't worried about his threat.

He sucked on his tongue in frustration, his hand coming to gently stroke your face in contrast to this harsh tone, " I am a very lucky man to have a woman so strong willed, you will give me perfect children." You were taken aback by the comment, expecting more back and forth.

"Shall we get started then?" Ivar smiled then lunged at you, pulling you into a firm kiss. You were slowly inching your way up the bed, stopping when you reached the pillows. Ivar climbed on top of you as you laid down, resting most of his weight on his arms.

"My wife." He dropped his head and kissed you, one of his hands spreading your legs apart. He slotted himself in the space, moving down your body with gentle kisses.

He kissed over your hips, then a line down from your belly button to your mound, "do you consent my love?" You nodded and he kissed your slit, using his thumb to spread you open.

You pressed his head into you as he went at you with vigour, eating you like a man starved, "you are a gift from the Gods y/n, I will spend the rest of my life making sure you know that." His fingers were sliding inside you and the world shrunk to Ivar's hands on your body.

It was his turn to be hauled up the bed, "husband please, why do you torture me so? Ivar laughed, "because you tortured me first, dearest." His voice was laced with reverence, it matched the soft brush of his fingertips over your face.

He shifted a little and you felt his tip bump your entrance, "please Ivar." He smiled down at you and you felt the warm pressure of his cock entering you. He paused, revelling in the feeling of you squeezing him. He breathed out against your lips and started moving his hips, the slow drag of his pelvis sucking the air out of your lungs.

"Oh Gods Ivar, you feel like Valhalla." that got a snarl out of him as he sped up. The seconds faded into each other, as time stretched on you lost count of how many times you peaked before Ivar followed you into bliss. Ivar stayed inside you long after he was done, finally sliding off you when the sweat started to dry.

"I meant what I said, you are going to give me wonderful children." You nuzzled into his side, "how many do you want?" He huffed a chuckle, "as many as you'll give me. I can't say I don't want sons, because I do. But if Frigg only give me daughter I will thank her everyday." You ran a hand through his hair.

"I like the sound of that, a boy first would be nice. I was an only child most of my life and I have to say having older brothers is great." Ivar smiled softly, "we will have to see pretty girl, I think mother would prefer a girl, she's always complaining there aren't enough women in court."

You turned in his arms so his back was pressed against your chest, "shall we try again in the morning?" Ivar's hand went over your body to lay over your pelvis, "yes, we have a month all to ourself. We're going to be busy the whole time."

************************************************************************

You managed a week together before the new court system pulled Ivar away, considering you had barely left the bed, you were almost relieved.

"King Harold left his land a few days ago, he will be arriving here soon to discuss the new alliance, after all he did for us at York I think it's a good idea that we ensure he is always on out side." There were nods all around and Ubbe chimed in.

"Last I heard he was planning his wedding to the daughter of a powerful Earl, we should give him many wedding gifts before he goes back home." Sigurd waved over a servent and about ten minutes later that brought over a new batch of furs.

"I think he will like these, they're from the land Bjorn absorbed a few months ago." They were nice, fluffy and soft, "those will do fine, we have some looted weapons for England, those plus gold and sliver should make a fine gift."

Bjorn picked up a map on the table, looking over it before passing it to Ubbe on his left, "there's a mine here that's currently closed due to a cave-in, but it's still full of copper. I think we should hire the engineers who handled the gates to see if there's any way around the fallen rocks without getting anyone killed."

Ivar took this map, looking over the surrounding area, "we need to send men up there to set up an outpost. It's very exposed and we don't want bandits attacking the area."

Hvitserk signalled for one of the guards to come over, "ensure someone is here later today to discuss this, we want to start as soon as possible."

The rest of the morning and early afternoon went the same way, one of the brothers would bring something up and they would discuss it until they came to a consensus. It was far more efficient than before when it was just the Queen and her advisors, with each brother offering something different. The few disagreements they had never devolved into fights since someone always being there to stop it from getting worse.

The future of Kattegat was looking bright.

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"Wife! You need to tell me if you want to keep both beds, they're starting on the inside of the Hall tomorrow." Of course Ivar would yell across the hallway rather than coming to get you. As you walked into his room and pulled you into his arms.

"I think we will, for one it means we won't have to bring another one in when our children are young, also I think having two beds could be fun." Ivar smiled down at you, "you are insatiable women, there's only one of me, you know?" You giggled at him, "I'm ok with that, I don't think I could handle two of you."

He gasped in mock offence, "are you saying I'm hard to deal with. A loving wife would never say that about her husband." You giggled at him, "oh no my love, just that if I had two of you, I would never leave the bed."

His expression became smug, "maybe that's a good thing, now that you're my wife, you shouldn't be working your fingers to the bone. What will our allies say if they know how hard you're working?" You shook your head at him, "they will say that you married a woman who cares about the people she is ruling over. It's never about the people in power Ivar, the people that matter are the people out there."

Ivar thought for a moment, "yes, you are right. Still, once you're with child, I only want you working from the Hall, just so I can keep you safe." You nodded, "I understand and I will do as you've asked but that doesn't mean I'm happy about it."

"Thank you y/n, you have greatly eased my worry."

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The Great Hall was buzzing with activity, King Harold's scout boat touched down early this morning and informed everyone he would be arriving in the next two days. Between the rebuild and all the issues being brought to the brothers, it was becoming harder and harder to plan feasts that didn't end in someone screaming at someone else.

You could hear Hvitserk yelling for the kitchens about none of the meat arriving in time and Sigurd was complaining bitterly about the music stage being moved for the construction.

"What am I meant to do with this, no one is going to hear us back here." You wonder over, Ivar following close behind.

"For Odin's sake brother, just set up next to the great table and if anyone complains, we'll kick them out." Sigurd rolled his eyes but did as his brother suggested.

"I need to go see if I can find another hunter for Hvitserk, he's going to burst a vein if he doesn't get the meat for the feast soon." Ivar put a hand on your shoulder, "I'll go, you'll end up getting stopped by someone who needs help. At least if I go, I can tell them to come to the Hall when we're ready to hear their issue."

Your shoulders slumped slightly and Ivar pulled you closer to him, "are you about to get a headache?" You nodded softy, "then you are going to go lay down and have some tea, if you don't I'll tell Ubbe." You were going to protest but the mention of his older brother had you running off.

"Thank you, dear wife."

*********

You were waiting at the docks with everyone else for King Harold's boat to dock. The day before Ivar had bought you another beautiful dress, this one a blood red with fine gold knotted thread all through it.

"How long do you think he'll be here for?" Ivar shrugged, "until he gets the deal that he wants. He doesn't want land or power, I think he just wants new trade routes. If that's all then we just need to discus how he's going to provide security for them." You thought for a moment before responding.

"It would be fairer if he covered the passages on his land and we looked after the ones on ours. However, we should work out some kind of joint group on the border." Ivar leaned down and kissed your head, "you are right as always."

Harold arrived mid-morning, jumping off his boat to warmly greet the brothers. He was having a hush conversation with Bjorn and then Ivar was being waved over.

"What do you think that's about?" Ivar looked around the dock at the men moving around, "nothing good, Harold said he was having problems with some people in his court. I wonder if it's gotten worse."

"Only one way to find out. You go over there, I'll introduce myself later." With one last quick kiss, Ivar was leaving you.

Something told you something was very wrong.

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