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Wait... Dream was born on August 12, 1999 and Dream was arrested in the Disc Finale on January 20, 2021 soo... wait, wait, wait, that means he was only 21 when he was imprisoned for life in a small lava covered box!... Did I do that math right? 21?! Man was barely able to drink legally in the United States and they gave him a life sentence in a boiling cell with nothing but lava, raw potatoes, a clock, and some books?!... oh my god...
#sorry.... I just... give me a minute to process... I mean I knew we were close in age but I guess I never really thought about it#sometimes I forget it happened all the way back in 2021 and just... wow.#and Tommy would have been 16 so getting his driver's license in most states... The age gap is like that of my siblings and huh...#my brother can be a real prick... its a weird thought to imagine him getting through in prison just for messing with us... damn...#dreblr#c!dream#this is fine#don't mind me researching for my lastest maddening project..... i can't stop thinking about Dream being Sam's project.......#I'd blame my job but... let's be honest the prison arc lives rent free in my brain lol XD#dsmp#dsmp dream#dream smp#dreamwastaken#no one does it like c!dream#prison arc#pandora's vault#dishing up lore#kinda? I guess...#lore thoughts#ouch... I'm older than c!dream was in prison now... poor baby... :'(
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throckmorton's wall of theories, 2021
#i was in deep. its a good thing none of this affected my ability to get schoolwork done!#what the fuck do you mean 2021 was three years ago. what the fuck#anyway i had/have a lot of theories about whatever the hell is going on with half life. fantastic games love to play another one someday#maybe i replay half life alyx. i have a job now i could splurge and get a used index. if i was stupid enough#half life#my art
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Only time yall will ever see me post about AI on this blog:
I'm glad that most people aren't treating Character.ai the same as something like Stable Diffusion. Online writers are way less protective of their work than digital artists. Maybe in individual cases there are exceptions, but by and large it is not the same at all.
With that said though, it always struck me as weird that fanfiction writers legally can not make money off their work, yet it *is* legal to use fics to train chat bots and then charge a fee to use those bots. Just incredibly weird.
#I am not pro AI or anti AI. I think it is a tool that can be useful; but could also harm people if used a certain way#I also think AI art is at its best when people embrace whatever weirdness crops up when you use a machine to do a person's job#This was more common in 2020 and 2021. It was cool. I miss AI creations from before the 20s boom. It was niche and experimental#And the idea of a computer replacing a human artist seemed so far away#Of course; people still used copyrighted stuff to train the models. But back then the average artist didn't even know what AI was#So it was kind of a “we'll cross that bridge when we get to it” deal. Well; we're at that bridge now. Time to cross it#Speaking of; it's genuinely hilarious how out of touch tech bros are with how digital artists feel about their work#Creators who regularly squabble over palette theft; pose theft; art program theft; etc are totally gonna be cool with scraping. Sure lol#<- sarcasm#Anyway; hope artists kick the asses of the “free use community” or whatever they call themselves in court
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oversharing in the tags time :)
#i think it’s time i go back to therapy#i keep having recurring nightmares about my ex best friend#or dreams where she reaches out to me. and explains why she cut me out#backstory. in high school had a lesbian toxic situationship with my#bestie. THEN i had another one. which kinda overlapped? the first one was open but also just messy#anyways. jade and i were like together for a year. then she got a boyfriend one day and i had a breakdown#it happened just after high school and i was sooooo … unwell. wasn’t out to my family felt like i was gonna die etc etc#(this is all pre dnp btw) anyways next year i found dnp. a couple months later she broke up with her bf#and we sorted dated for a while (this whole time we’d been just friends and i was still not really over it but hiding it)#and then she dated ANOTHER guy. they broke up and she had a breakdown and moved 9 hours away. i went#to visit her for a month. we like kinda dated again then and i thought we could make it work. then 2020. no travel#so she started dating a guy. didn’t tell me. even though we spoke every day. she moved in with him#then she breaks up with him mid 2021. i started dating my gf. but Jade was clingy and it was awkward#she started dating a sketchy guy who was homophobic. i went and visited her a few times#start of 2023 she tells me she wants to make more of an effort cause he didn’t like her friends so she cut everyone out. then she ghosted#in feb 2023. we had tickets for#mcr in march. i had to text her cause she’d blocked me on messenger and said im going to the concert whether she’s there or not#she said ‘yeah no worries! you can take someone else in my place too 😎’ she used that fucking emoji#and I haven’t spoken to her since. I think she quit her job . and that guy was not a nice man#so I still worry about her#writing this all down makes me realise she was a bitch and I deserve better#but I just want closure. it isn’t fair she replied so casually to my text when I said ‘you’ve blocked me’#it isn’t fair she HAS MY SIGNED COPY OF DANS BOOK#anyways. I need therapy to get over this#and I haven’t even written about my family issues (im#out and they’re supportive but my god they fucked me#up as a kid)#if you read this hi 👋 hope you are having a lovely day#don’t get in lesbian situationships!!!
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spent weeks psyching myself up to stand up to my mum and then immediately got shot down by her 😃👍
#vent incoming i apologise in advance for the long tags#we've lived together just the two of us since dec 2021 (although her boyfriend is here like 2/3 of the time as well)#and since i got my job in march 2022 i have been paying half of all the bills (literally down to like tv license when i barely watch the tv)#which is £300 a month#plus i buy all my own food + pay for the amazon prime she uses + contribute to various household things like toilet roll etc#and she doesn't have a mortgage so i am paying the same amount as her to live in her house#(and it is very much her house not our house)#and I've never been very happy with any of that but never complained either#but then recently it turned out she never set up the water bill when we moved in (it's one of the only bills i didn't sort for us)#so we have a huge backdated bill from dec 2021 and i knew she was going to tell me to pay half#so for the past month or so I've been preparing myself for this conversation and sure enough today she came and said 'we owe £700'#so i was like 'oh i thought maybe it would've been covered by my £300/month' which is the biggest stand I've been able to work myself up to#and she immediately started going on about how i live here too and use water too so it's just as much my responsibility to pay#and how when we're both earning i should be paying my share and i was like yeah i know that's why i never complained about paying before#but also i already pay more than most people would to live with their parents#and she went off about how actually most people charge their grown up kids rent on top of the bills so really i'm lucky i don't have to#(when she got the original £300 figure it was actually rounded up from like £240 to include 'rent' but i wasn't gonna bring that up now)#and in conclusion she doesn't see why she should be subsidising my bills#like i don't know maybe because you're my MOTHER and i am your CHILD who is just starting out in the adult world#and maybe that entitles me to being treated better than some lodger???!!!!!#anyway i paid the bill and now i'm trying and failing at not crying at my desk 😃#talking
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my absolutely biggest online pet peeve is US centric people projecting their rich sorority girl bully stereotype of nurses onto everyone else, as if nurses aren't working class and mostly immigrants of colour everywhere else. and when did it become cool to hate on underpaid and exploited workers anyway
#*when i say ''everywhere else'' i mean sweden specifically. idk what it's like in other countries#anyway it bothers me to no end#most of my coworkers are 1. very nice and 2. quite poor and part of many oppressed classes and groups#a vast majority of them are either single mothers who have immigrated from the middle east or africa#or young afghan men who came here in 2015-2021 during the refugee wave#on many shifts ive been 1. the only nurse born in sweden and 2. the only female nurse#your experiences are not universal#the way the internet talks about nurses bothers me to no end! not every nurse makes insane dollars a year and is blonde and married to a cop#i googled this once and american nurses on average make 2x or even nearly 4x of what i made at my previous job. depending on state#enough ppl in the ward i worked at were muslim that we celebrated ramadan all of us basically. not exactly but it did affect the schedule#many of my coworkers could barely afford clothes for all their kids and we all worked crazy hours and kept getting overworked and burnt out#i hate the american stereotype!!!!!#''nurses are mostly high school bullies who like being in control of and hurting vulnerable people'' no! that isn’t true! it just isn’t!#lots of bad healthcare isnt bc the workers are sadists.its bc the resources from the government are lacking and the workers are understaffed#like#we know when the care isn’t good. and it feels Bad actually to not be able to do it better#lots ppl change professions bc of the ethical stress. it's not fun. and sometimes it's obvious a patient feels like theyre not getting heard#but you don't have the time to sit down and listen or whatever else. there isn't time or resources for it#and a lot of crucial vital conditions/symptoms sometimes get missed bc of lack of resources and competence quitting#it's not bc nurses are evil and want ppl to die and suffer. i feel like this has got to be some kind of propaganda circulating#it's such a bizarre stereotype when you think about it. and it's just not true to reality. idk#anyway what do i know. maybe they are actually evil in america. it's possible. a lot of bizarre things are true in america#i just hate the narrative online#pickapost
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decided for giggles to see what dsmp has been up to in the. Two and a half years since I last looked
Anyways so canon is trashfire but the part of me that started sunbringer in dsmp is now stirring to make More stuff. Like a "the universe reset thing but dream is still in prison so it doesn't reach him" thing that I'm trying to remove from brain bc I actually didn't do the catching up via vods and instead looked at fandom reaction for instructions and uhm.
Yeah no I genuinely want to write this it's gonna be so interesting but also who even does dsmp anymore like is there an audience
#dsmp#Anyways reminder to everyone that's new here that sunbringer started in dsmp#and therefore the current hermitcraft fic will mention multiple dsmp characters#Like. There won't be a fic for dsmp in sunbringer bc I can never decide how I wanna approach it#But the reason its called sunbringer is bc I used to be a dream apologist for a hot minute in 2020#(tbh. Not an apologist but also still standing in the “if I met c!tommy I would also want to hurt him” camp. like fuck that kid)#Anyways so the sunbringer is dream he fought the original ender dragon and won the best prize aka the literal sun#And uhh#Also he and tubbo are brothers in that one and there used to be a prophecy abt how dream gonna die at the hands of a human child#Which is. Why sunbringer dream did everything#He's a “self fulfilling prophecy as in I'm working to fulfill the prophecy on purpose” type guy#So he meets his first confirmed human child that fits all the criteria for the prophecy and its tommy#And he goes “well how do I convince this child to murder me” and tbh does a pretty good job at it I think#Also tubbo reincarnates and is a seasons god so rn is spring tubbo but in the hermitcraft fic we get mentions of summer and winter tubbos#Idk#dsmp au#Sunbringer au mentions in tags ig#Anyways tho the new dsmp au idea is gonna combine w one I had in like early 2021 I think#Featuring c!george bc I think using the xd bit to have George communicate w dream of the original world in dreams would be. Interesting#... Goddamnit I'm gonna have to name this one grass whistles like the old george au was called#Anyways I'm back to being a dsmp enjoyer by accident bc one of my mutuals rbed a post on how its been a while since dsmp on dashboard#And I genuinely enjoy some of the fanmade stuff for it. Like the music is all good stuff obvs but like#Bc I'm deep in fandom gachatube reaction vids. That community is so good in terms of what they do to dsmp#Like hello this is stupid good stuff#They straight up do like. Blinking. And microexpressions. And lip syncing the text to the character#Ghhkhj
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ive been on that hybrid schedule since like 2023 but i worked in person 5 days a week through 2019-the whole early pandemic and i can't remember how i used to manage going to the office on the first day of my period like i cant imagine. every month. im complaining about my day NOW and im in sweatpants how did i manage to do this for years
#and i was wearing makeup in 2020 too like why was i doing that#AND i was way worse about painkillers a few yrs ago i was so scared of dependency i wouldnt take one unless i was like dying#also the fact that my first shitty office job made us come in even though our work is remote ready was crazy. cause it was 2021.#like we were masking up at our desks which was good but also if you are taking that precaution just let us wfh#EVERYTHING was already set up for remote work like everything. i took work home all the time#so. what was the reason.
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Time (2021) dir. Ricky Ko
#eyes#i enjoyed this so much omfg#its about three people who used to be assassins but are now older in a modern world that has no use for them or their job#the found family themes are off the charts my god#i loved the youngest girl so much theres a whole other main character in this that i didnt include purely just bc i loved her sm skjdhf#time (2021)
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arey
#fir hit ho gayi kya hai tumblr ko im in my feels#using tumblr the way i used to (dear diary...)#haan so like. fees#and like#unhone foundation ki registration ki bhi bhari thi way back in 2021 jab unka package abhi jitna hai usse bhi aadha tha😭#i remember telling dad back then ki aap wapis kar dena didi ko#and she said arey babe tension mat le ye mera investment hai fir return tujhse bharvaungi😭😭😭#like. return bharne mein jitne paise nahi lagte usse kai zyada baar unhe meri fees bhar di#like just#i can't explain why it indicates so much love and trust and support#imagine being trapped in ek ghar bachpan se and you know the only way out is to be financially independent#and to live there in the meantime you have to scarifice your everything your thoughts opinions freedom YOUR VOICE#your whole life basically#and then finally FINALLY after clearing the toughest fucking exams of the country getting a awesome fucking degree and#slaying at a job for a huge multinational company#you finally achieve your dream you're finally free and independent you can do whatever you want#and then in such early stages of your career you spend it all on your loserass little sister jo fail ho chuki hai 1 baar#like bhaii😭😭😭😭#anyway i love her hope woh wapis jaldi aa jaye already bohot yaad aa rahi hai but itsok hope woh wahan khush rahe heal ho jaye
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Why is my granddad messaging me and shading my uncle
#my uncle’s business was featured on a youtube channel because he and various other people at the business collaborated with a local artist#on a very (physically) big project#(i’m being deliberately vague to avoid doxxing my uncle)#and tell me why my granddad was like ‘he’s doing so well. i didn’t know he had it in him’#sir THIS IS YOUR SON#you invested in his business!! did you do that thinking it would fail#i’m ngl it sounded like kind of a bizarre idea when he pitched it to us all; but it also sounded like an untapped market & something that#could be a goldmine in the right hands. and it does seem to be in the right hands#i was just like ‘yeah i didn’t expect this either but it looks great’ and left it at that#i am once again asking when me and my uncle traded places as ‘the successful one’ & ‘the black sheep of the family’#i would never suggest that there’s a correlation. but also since my uncle started his business; i have been mugged twice#my mentor who i trusted tried to ruin my career and did succeed in making a lot of people lose respect for me; i had to leave the only job#that accepted me because they tried to make me work thrice as many hours as i was being paid for and gave me zero support#i was unemployed for months and losing my mind and finally had to become a barista and just as i was starting to enjoy that; i dislocated#my knee & sprained two joints in the process#oh and it wasn’t the first time!! i’ve actually dislocated that knee four times. all during the time my uncle had his business#let’s not even talk about how i got covid 3 times or all the shit that happened to me in 2021 because i really will scream#2021 literally had it in for me in every single way#i literally think my uncle was being dunked on by the universe but he found a way to dodge the curse and he has no descendants#so it just passed to me. i need to hand this curse over to a child#maybe i should just start a business. doing what though 🧐#personal
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rant in tags bc I want to sob into a pillow
#I can’t describe to you guys what my job is like. I know I post ridiculous funny stuff but it’s very rarely funny in the moment#I’m a substitute teacher‚ which means that even though I’m in the building EVERY DAY OF THE YEAR#and even though I’ve known most of these kids since LAST DECEMBER (2021)#they just. don’t fucking listen to a word I say#it took 14 minutes and a dean of students in the room with me today to get one of my classes to stop talking over/ignoring me#and I’m not even yelling at them‚ I’m literally trying to 1.) say ‘good afternoon folks!’ and 2.) tell them what the assignment is#all day long I’m ignored and disrespected by the same kids and there are no consequences because this is a charter school#and day after day I’m also disrespected by staff because I’m ‘just a sub’ and you#everyone keeps calling out of work#we finally filled the last VACANCY we had TWO WEEKS AGO. we’ve been down 3 full time teachers since the beginning of the year#and as of two weeks ago we finally filled the last vacancy. so I could go back to JUST substituting.#but today the 7th grade ELA teacher just gave us his one-week notice which means that now that I am the ONLY BUILDING SUB#(we started the year with 3‚ now it’s just me)#I have this terrible suspicion that I’m gonna get stuck with 7th grade ELA for the rest of the year. while trying to do grad school.#I just… I’m exhausted all the time#and I act like I’m not but I am#this job is so demeaning and exhausting and I love my students (specifically my 8th graders and high schoolers)#but I’m not gonna see them for the rest of the year. I’m gonna be stuck in 7th grade ELA I just know it#when I say that the middle school is like an active war zone I’m not joking#I had to stop a kid from choking out his classmate today#I leave work every day with headaches because it’s always so fucking loud‚ even in the middle of lessons#I want my old job back‚ this year has been exhausting and I don’t know how I’ve ended up taking on so much more than I’m supposed to#I covered 6 out of 7 periods again this week. the most that any full time teacher has to teach is 4 out of 7#and the subbing coordinator keeps giving me the heaviest coverage loads and then telling me he’s ‘disappointed’ by how tired I am#he also gave every single person on the subbing team specific shoutouts in his daily emails… except me#tldr I’m feeling disrespected by students and overworked by my coordinator and undersupported by admin and taken for granted by coworkers
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student loans took cash out of the wrong acct on the big bills month (between wifi, rent, phone, effectively i have maybe 100$ left on my paycheque, so, rent). so i had to pay off credit AND that negative balance so my small savings is drained.
#i have a cash thing with a little extra cash in my room but i have to use ha#lf of it for this#i need to get access to the money my mom is keeping from me#cuz when i have access to that#its not a lot but its more than ive ever had#and i can use that to send around to people so i dont have to worry about being in this stress#im keeping a note of everyone who's ever helped me out#and when i get out of this financial abuse sitch w my mom proper they're getting whatever i can afford first#im so mad no one should be struggling fuck capitalism#but when i got this job in 2020 my rent was 700 and we were in a pandemic (Still are)#but still having like lockdowns#it was just groceries#now my rent is 1000#i spent a bunch of money supporting someone early 2021 which drained my savings#and i dont regret it but god i wish i was smarter with money#and my student loans kicked back in when they stopped the hault on repayments#and then inflation#im literally employed by the government and i dont get paid enough to live here#i used to be able to support my people financially and now its like#5 or 10 $ is ahhhh a lot of the time#i keep getting up to almost 1000 savings and then credit card or student loans or mental health episode#and i know part of it is my own fault#i am bad and impulsive with money#and i havent confronted my mother proper about the $$$ thats in my name but somewhat inaccessible#fuck i just gotta do it i cant keep up like this and my ppl deserve my support i cant fucking ask#i just#idk#im gonna go delete the post i made askin its my damn fault
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How do you tell your parents that you have depression, anxiety and adhd without them going ‘no you don’t have it, it’s just an excuse/you’re imagining it’? Because damn I heavily need that if I’m going to go back to Russia. Because if I do, I’ll have to… really talk to them. Face to face. About… many things. 🫠
#irl cw#mobile.#I do need to talk to them about 2020#and 2021#and how I was affected it#December of 2020 and January of 2021 were…#really dangerous to me#but gods. how do you tell that to those who’ll probably just say you’re imagining it and using it as an excuse and you just need to be#better than that which is fucked up but whatever#anyways. I just.#I’m tired#I’m applying for jobs. AGAIN.#I’m…. gods….#I’m going to write starters rn and see where I’ll go from there#one day at a time#❄ ― OUT OF CHARACTER. ╱ fun time’s passing by like river’s flow.
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No it won't. This is the USA. Last time they boycotted an election we got Trump, but alas you all really want this country to be more disrespected then ever, and for everyone's info, the only margin you all have is Kamala Harris (love the idea she is the one manipulating Biden like guys he has a wife for that) and the Spanish Gal (she is in congress and is overall interesting worldview points) are funny as fuck. And Biden is 81 and Trump is 77 so heh. Just elect a dead guy or the one who has a worm in his head (frankly...Knowing this fuck ass country you might as well.)
Boycott doesn't work in the USA, Look at what happened to BLM.
The economy and shitty entrepreneur can be boycotted but you know what will happen if you just go :
"You know what I disapprove this whole gist I am not voting this election-" THAT'S HOW YOU GET TRUMP, IT'S LITTERALLY WHAT HAPPENED IN 2016 THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO VOTED FOR HIS FUCK ASS WERE PEOPLE THAT WERE LIKE :
"Oh wouldn't it be funny if we voted for the guy who was a TV reality star because WOmEn can't lead and oooooooh she going in them sheets with the Russian says the Orange Guy Epstein's best buddy looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool" and "YES THAT MAN RIGHT HERE COMMITING MORE TAX FRAUDS WITH BUILDINGS EVERYWHERE IS WHAT TRULY REPRESENTS AMERICAAAAAAAAA MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN, WIFE LET'S GET THIS RED BASEBALL HATS-" oh and let's not forget our all time FAVORITE fuck of course
"I mean she problably cheated to get where she is so I am going to vote for the duck face guy who talks like a failed drag queen and just hope he doesn't fuck up too much..."
Now...Guess how it went. Remember his terms were 2016-2020
I need you to connect the two neurons you have available and ask yourself "What am I doing with my life ?"
Now that Eurovision is over, I want you all, especially the Americans, to take a good hard look at how the voting results turned out when people boycotted the event.
In the UK, the viewing figures were down about 2 million people compared to last year. Up to 2 million people made the conscious decision to not watch and not vote because of Israel's inclusion.
The final results of the public vote, Israel came in first place in the UK and got 12 points. Because the only people watching and voting were people who backed Israel or at least didn’t care one way or another.
This doesn't matter. It's a music contest. The boycott was still the right thing to do because it is just a show at the end of the day, and the viewing figures have more impact than the results.
But it is also a good object lesson to show you what happens if you boycott a vote over something that does matter. Choosing not to vote in, let's say, a presidential election will have similar results.
#usa#i can't#you all so fucking stupid#voting is the only real right that you actually have#fucking use it#i have been through 9 mental crisis#6 exams that will determine wether i have enough to buy groceries#IF i find a god damn job#and you absolute morons have still not understood the simple “VOTE” command#like why do you hate your own country to the point you wish people to almost die#the only way you could boycott the elections is doing a fucking riot like 2021 at the capital
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I used to draw
#bts#park jimin#kim namjoon#jung hoseok#ive been feelinh very mentally unwell for probably the last 4 months to a year ngl#and i talked to a friend today just looking for advice#because i dont actually have any real hardships in my life#i have a great job#i have a great apartment#i did everything i was supposed to in college#i have so many many great great friends#but this whole becoming an adult thing is just very isolating#and i talked to my friend and she said i should go on a walk#but yk my apartment is surrounded by not 1 but 2 cemeteries#rip wei wuxian you wouldve loved it#so i drove out to the university and paid for parking#and my headphones were dead#so now im just walking the river#and im sitting on a cool little deck under some trees#and i thought about how i used to draw#when i graduated college in 2021 i felt much the same as i do now#very very unhappy#and really afraid of getting older#and even today im so mad that im still not in college#and rn im sitting at a college that isnt even my own#but hey i used to draw and that made me feel really good#i actually never drew until 2021 and really suprised myself at how good i was#i have yoongi piece i stopped because i got busy with grad school and work#but maybe ill go back to it#berry agenda rise
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