#unwrapping presents!

[officialjohnjones]

*Skull walks up to you, and places a comically wide “Swiss army” style pocket knife in your palm. It was about a foot long, and had everything from a knife, to a bottle opener, to a nose hair trimmer, and even a tiny, hardly even bright flashlight, among other contraptions which I am too out of ideas to come up with. All the while you’re questioning the very existence of this item, skull is staring at you with “The Jim Carrey smile”*

Thanks Skull, I'm quite certain I'll need some of these items at some point. Eh, never hurts to be prepared!

*Jones pocketed the knife-thing. Maybe this is a chekov's gun, or maybe the last we see of it. Who knows?*

[affixjoy]

[thisisnsfw-v3]

@littlemousekeeper turned me into a pretty little present to unwrap for you all 🥰

Presents from my favourite mutuals always make me feel so lucky 🥹

[atanerrum]

a follower brought the first donuts cd from japan just to gift it to me specifically. Insane. ignore the giant trigun tapestry i have in my room, i'm normal

[kirby-the-gorb]

(as always, no obligation, but if you wanna do something for my birthday, my kofi is in the pinned post, or I will always gladly accept kirby drawings <3 )

[marvel-lous-guy]

Tony: What the hell was that!?

Peter: what was what?

Tony: you shot me!

Peter: no I didn't

Tony: Yes you did

Peter: *awkwardly hiding a paintball gun behind his back* when was the last time you slept? Maybe you're hallucinating again

Tony: ...I literally just woke up 5 minutes ago

Peter: maybe you hallucinated going to sleep

Tony: what

[missbubblesoda]

from levi’s instagram (2024.10.14)

you can support my art on kofi.com/missbubblesoda

[stevethehairington]

eddie munson has one of those traditional style bicep "mom" heart tattoos except instead of mom it says "wayne"

[nicofan57]

merry christmas!!!!!!! i hope everyone gets what they wished for today 🌷

[satans-knitwear]

May we politely request some floofy babies content as a little Christmas treat? 🐶🐶

Merry Christmas my loves!!! I hope santa paws had you all on the nice list ✨

Beanie Baby was allowed to open her present first!!! And she proceeded to spend much of the day watching us from her new froggy bed 🐸

Rosie is unable to comment rn bc she is chomping on her new bone somewhere. 🍖

[officialjohnjones]

[ Many presents come directly by messengers or in person by the gifter but a too-late response to a camera's motion sensor is Jones' only indicator of a visitor in his own office. By the time anyone arrives they only catch a glimpse of silver hair from the intruder making her exit and the heavyset box sat on his desk. How she even got on board, let alone how she'll get off is less pressing ultimately than the box.

Well okay maybe it's a pressing matter for later. ]

[ The aforementioned box is wrapped in glittery red paper and there's a leather envelope tied down to it. The letter inside is scented like cinnamon. ]

Jones,

While certainly not familiar with each other in any sense I figured an act of good will would help keep your quips to yourself, as thanks. Though as I write this I know it'll only increase them tenfold so I have only myself to blame.

I hope what's enclosed is appreciated. Especially the clothing as I know you need better wear for formal events, specifically New Years.

Cheers, Valeria

[ Inside the box sits a hefty and well-made quilt, expensive but handmade, and two sets of clothing. A nice silk dress shirt in a heavy dark blue with a suit jacket and slacks to match in duller almost-gray tones, alongside a sleek leather belt and tie with a fun banana print. There's also a designer watch, notably one that spies would wear. ]

The second set of clothing is from one of the designer shoots Valeria had done ages ago, a short black dress with a chunky oil-spill belt separating the sleeveless top from the mutli-layered skirt that poofs out. The bottom of the skirt is autographed by both the designer and Valeria herself in white ink. It comes with a pair of matching boots and shades. ]

- @valeria-fortnite

*Jones first considers that he should get that new security system installed ASAP, and have Evie and a few other hackers look over the holes. Maybe Mae is available somewhere.*

*He then considers the actual gift. Leave it to Valeria to give a thoughtful gift while also being incredibly conceited about it. Why, the generosity almost made him feel bad for not sending her a Winterfest gift. Well, almost.*

*He's got no idea what in the world he'd possibly do with the dress-- maybe someone with a keener eye for fashion would help him handle that disaster. The suit, however, is nice, and looks like it will fit well. Considering he's the average build of every Jones on the island, perhaps it hadn't been too trying for Valeria. And the banana tie was a funny touch that he genuinely chuckled at, before determining to never wear it in public.*

*The quilt, though... That is nice. He attempted a quilt, once, and its sad remains were wiped from history (thank goodness) several islands ago, so he's aware the time, effort, and resources that would have had to go into it. Was it made by Valeria herself, or someone else? He did recognize that stitch on the bottom as one Hope also tended to put into her own stitched-up outfits, so maybe Valeria did make it. Props to her, if so.*

*Finally, the letter itself. Expensive stationary, clearly premium ink, and dusted with just a touch of cinnamon that was still somehow powerful enough for him to smell it from inside the envelope.*

"At least she didn't add a lipstick stain to it."

*Jones commented wryly. Apparently she could be tasteful, a revelation in and of itself.*

*All in all, it seemed he would have to get her a gift himself, one as equal parts thoughtful and tongue in cheek. Time to start writing down ideas...*

[ryuusea]

some silly doodles upon finding out I’m the one April baby in a server full of January babies haha

[hurglewurm]

ah that holiday depression

[saintlaurentbby13]

[nanocados]

Ling-er’s idea of a Christmas gift ;)

(Drew this last year but forgot to post)

[hailthegodsong]

the ribbon and jingle bell around his neck, the “be naughty save santa the trip” shirt , the leopard santa hat, the MINI SKIRT, and the fucking STOCKINGS