#universal yum yums

[siddyyyyyyyy]

Red Knight in Shining Armour

Red Hood x Reader

wc: 1.3 K; part two summary: You ask Red Hood for help from a creep and he does so warnings: cat calling a/n: Something possessed me and I had to write this small drabble. Might consider writing more parts to it, dunno

Finally, you‘ve finished your shift in that overly warm bakery. After taking care of mostly elderly customers, baking fresh goods, and taking care of some more rather demanding customers, you could make your way home. The fresh february air hits you as you step before closing the small bakery, making your way to the busstop. Gotham is not known for warm or sunny weather, especially during the shortest month of the year. This is why you wrap your scarf tighter around you, making sure you won‘t catch a cold with the freezing wind that flies right against you. You eventually reach your desired destination, satisfied the bus is already standing there, possibly waiting for you.

As soon as you reach it, he cheekily drives away and leaves you waiting for the next bus… in two hours.

Now, of course you wouldn‘t wait two freezing hours around eleven PM in Gotham. It‘s probably safer and way faster to just walk the half an hour to your apartment. With that logic, you start trotting home, feeling a little moody now. What kind of bus driver just drives away even when a person clearly walks towards it? Muttering incoherent insults at the bus driver, you make sure to keep yourself warm enough at the same time. Your coat is doing a mostly good job at keeping you from trembling, so does your thick scarf. But you wish you brought your warm hat with you.

You tense at hearing heavy steps behind you. Sure, Gotham is definitely not the safest city, but you never had to actively protect yourself from any dangers because you always had the bus! That goddamn bus is driving you nuts, to the point you don‘t notice the strange man approaching you closer. He‘s about a few feet away from you now, finally raising his voice.

»Hey, princess! Are you lost?«

You finally glance behind your shoulder, not having expected for him to actually be a little closer to you now. Oh, he is taller than you. And has his hands in his pockets. This doesn‘t look good at all.

You quickly turn your head forward again, quickening your steps to get home faster and escape this creepy goon. He doesn‘t relent though and follows you, his hood over his head in a really suspicious way. You turn into a dark alley, cursing yourself internally for needing to go in there in order to get home faster. The alley is dark but also pretty long, as if a neverending hallway. Finally, the alleyway has an opening, walking a little faster again to escape the creep, but you also have to be careful not to slip on some ice.

A flash of red is appearing in the cornor of your eye, instinctively looking over to your side. Without further hesitancy, you hurry to the infamous vigilante and glance behind your shoulder briefly again.

»Red Hood! Please, there‘s someone following me, please pretend to be my boyfriend! Please!«

You plead desperately and stay by his side, your heart racing more from the paranoia of being followed and also from being so close to the real Red Hood, asking for help.

The vigilante doesn‘t flinch from his spot, studying you briefly before looking to the direction you just came from. The scary creep appears now too, eyes trained on you under his hood and possibly not even scared of the Crime Lord standing right beside you.

Without thinking, Red Hood wraps his arm around your shoulder and straightens his posture. The goon finally glances at him before his eyes fall back on you.

»C‘mon, sweetie, aren‘t you gonna spend time with me?« You shake your head urgently and press yourself more into Red‘s side, the hard material of his armour flush against your own soft coat.

»Does she know you?« The man beside you almost snarls, his voice a little distorted from his red helmet. An almost mocking scoff escapes the creep in front of you, staying there with some distance.

»Does it matter?«

A shudder runs down your spine at the words, making Red Hood squeeze your shoulder lightly with his hand.

He guides you to stand more behind him, glaring at the man under his helmet, feeling the strong urge to just beat him up into pieces. Still, he acts without any physical violence, not wanting to scare you even more.

»Listen here, you son of a bitch. Either, you go back the way you came here, or you won‘t recognise your face the next morning. If you‘ll wake up.«

He threatens, which makes the other man take a small step back. He seems to consider something, glancing to you as you still stand behind the vigilante. After what seems like a few minutes of tense silence, the weirdo walks away from you both.

You exhaled relievedly, stepping closer to Red Hood again.

»Thank you so much! You just probably saved my life from him, I don‘t know how to pay you back.«

He looks to you again, his expression unreadable due to his helmet. But he does shake his head and holds one of his hands up lightly.

»No need to, lady. I‘m always here for help, don‘t worry.«

Red feels lightly weird calming down a random person, but he feels like he needs to. After all, he just pried a man – a really creepy bastard – from you. And it feels wrong to ask for something in return for it. He never does that sort of stuff.

»Well, still… You know what? You can visit my bakery, I‘ll give you a treat. On the house, of course!«

He feels surprised at your request, thinking over your suggestion for a moment.

»I‘ll see what I can do.« He pauses before saying goodbye, glancing around the area briefly.

»Do you need a ride home? It‘s not safe around midnight.«

Now it‘s your turn to be surprised, mulling over the suggestion. It‘s only twenty minutes until you‘re back home safely, but you also don‘t want to be a further bother to him. Eventually, you decide to be truthful.

»I was just planning on walking the last twenty minutes home. I don‘t want to bother you any longer...«

Another sudden wind goes past you, which makes you wrap your scarf tighter around your neck again, the action not going unnoticed by him. Finally, despite his own pride, he suggests taking you home with his bike. You feel star-struck, never having thought someone like him – no, Red Hood would give you a ride home. After saving you, too.

Not able to miss such an opportunity, you agree, and he helps you put on his extra helmet for the quick ride. Luckily, he knows this area of the city well, just needing the name of your address, and he knows which route he needs to take.

»Hold on tight, yeah?« At this point, he muted his comms, as well as the others, not wanting for them to hear you both and the other way around. He starts driving you back to your apartment complex, feeling a small thrill as you sit behind him and have your arms wrapped around his torso. Every time he makes a turn, you hold on even tighter to him, not used to riding a motorcycle at all.

Eventually, after some minutes of driving, you arrive, and he helps you get off the bike. You take off the extra helmet he gave you, ruffling your hair to let it look less messy from the helmet. He watches, taking the helmet from you, and eventually leaves on his bike, but not without memorising your street and face. Just in case.

Finally, you made it home, having a big story to tell your best friend tomorrow morning at work.

»You‘ve got a girlfriend now, Jaybird?«

Dick‘s smug voice chimes into his earpiece once he turns the comms on again.

»None of your business, Dickhead.« Jason grumbles back, earning a brief scolding from Bruce to use their callsigns again.

←MASTERLIST

[phoenixcatch7]

It's always funny to me when in an lu fic the chain is offered bananas and don't accept them. Like, you're offering these high energy adventures free food?? Fruit they'll have never even heard of before??? A ridiculously expensive imported good at best?? AND it boosts your attack?

Not ONE of these idiots would ever turn down something new and interesting to eat at least once. They'd be all over those bananas and immediately get dubbed yiga and I'm honestly surprised no one has used it in a fic yet 🤭

[who-always-pays-their-taxes]

i love the batfam they’re so whumpable they’re so angsty and pathetic. they make me so sad all of the time and i love it, i wanna squeeze all the sadness out of them. i wanna hit them around like a piñata and see what sad pathetic things come out.

[grishaversegirlblogger]

davina // fem!crowley wip

this was started as a fem crowley wip. got too distracted by davids big baby browns so here we are..

this was basically how it went vvv :

need to get the full body shot done soon because david as the dr's assistant is UNBELIEVABLY cvnty. no notes.

[luckyshinyhunter]

💑Gotta love character growth and the quality of friendship!💑

[delecttric]

🌍 everyplaces4free Follow

Diamantsholmen, near Where-No-Dragon-Goes-Hungry, Ice Kingdom

🟩 alchemical-sin Follow

greatest icewing architecture

🌫️ iceyspicey-deactivated49970701

this entire fucking site hates us so much. gå ad helvede til og spis lort din fanden intet liv ingen forældre PIKSUGENDE UVIDENDE SPILD AF LUFT

🟩 alchemical-sin Follow

whoa rødgrød med fløde cunt

[scarletackrmn]

Tim Drake is the person who sings good in the shower, and outside of it probably sounds terrible

- quote from my wife yesterday

[kevindavidday]

AU where canon compliant monsters are travelling to edens via their beloved maserati and neil's staring bored out the window. everyone in the back is asleep. when, suddenly, neil notices they've passed one of the sign boards twice now and blinks. then he sees another building he saw a while ago. then another. and he turns to andrew. "something's wrong, we've passed by here before."

and andrew is already frowning because he's not one to forget where he's going. he slows down a bit but then things start looking normal so they both calm down.

except when they reach the house at columbia there's already a car parked there. and not just any car, it's the one they originally had before it got vandalized and crushed.

and then they see the monster's stream out. younger. more carefree. more alive. all five of them watch with various expressions of shock as andrew takes neil's hand in his own, unbothered by the public display of affection. jaw's drop when neil turns around to talk casually with aaron minyard of all people. and worst of all is the outrageous gasp that leaves nicky's mouth when kevin moves up behind aaron and places a kiss on his forehead.

aaron's fake-puking, kevin is just staring in shock before he notices andrew's expression and starts shaking his head in denial. neil is up in front of andrew before he kills kevin, telling him that those people aren't real and clearly something's gone wrong. and nicky is hyperventilating with shock at all that he has just seen.

that's when the younger, more well-adjusted, monsters notice the older ones and nicky stops.

"uh- guys? am i hallucinating or are we standing right there?"

[dizzybizz]

ALL I WANNA DO IS SEE YOU TURN INTO A GIANT WOMAN A GIANT WOMAN ALL I WANNA BE IS SOMEONE WH-@thekittyfox2999

[ummsomethingis1]

Hiper sans!! (My oc)

He’s partially colorblind and he colors on himself with crayon!! (He also eats crayon)

[hurtslikeyourmouth]

[inkykeiji]

Thinking about touya nii making reader spread herself after he creampies her and taking a photo of his cum running out for safekeeping >//<

ah yes, one of his very favourite pastimes <333 it’s art, baby, is what he tells you, when you ask him why he does it so often. he’s making art of your body; you’re making art, together—his cum is paint and your body is the canvas (cheesy, but true!). but isn’t it all the same? you ask, so soft, so naive, so incredibly stupid that he can’t help but chuckle, caressing the curve of your ass or your inner thigh with his knuckles.

no, sweetheart, he says, cooed out condescension drooled from his lips, his eyes gone melty and warm as he stares at you, lidded and shimmering delicately. each creampie is unique; each creampie is special, and it is his duty as an artist—as the artist of your body—to document the prettiest ones.

he rarely lets you see them. these photos are something he keeps just for himself, locked away behind a password-protected album in his phone, hidden buried within folders. these photos are something he cherishes deeply, fondly, in lonely motel beds and dead backroads and cold nights—something that warms his chest straight to it’s rotten core, to see that the two of you created something so beautiful, together. sometimes he doesn’t even jerk off to them; just stares at them wistfully, daydreaming about creating another the moment he returns home to you <3

[profedger]

“Do you think we’ll be lovers in every universe?”

“.. I think so.”

Edit: I forgot saikis limiters. Pretend they’re there😁!!..

[enthusiastic-nimrod]

Pink Taffy' bedroom!!! I loved drawing this- bedrooms are so much fun because you can put so much character into them!

One of the things I knew I wanted was for her to have a platform in her room, and I thought the fence would be a fun add on. I think my favorite prop in her room is the cotton candy lamp! I just think it's cute.

[caty3440]

i finished itttt it's probably really underwhelming because there's no shading or good background stuff but i'm proud of it

[miaoqing]

which came first; PIDW the universe or PIDW the story? is it all made up by SQH's imagination or is he some sort of seer/messenger who simply recounts what happens in PIDW (with some edits)? so many interesting implictions either way.......