#uninformed thoughts

[not-souleaterpost]

Sinuhe, the prestige tv anti-hero

Yup, this post will probably be the farthest from anything I am usually known for

So some months ago, while being stuck in the hospital, I didn't have anything better to do than read this book which I somehow got into my possesion. Funnily enough it's author is supposedly the most famous Finish author, and during the 60s there even was a Hollywood movie adaption all the jazz. Yet today it's hard to find anybody online talking about it.

So in a way this is my motivation. Yet what is there to say? Will I repeat the one thing everyone praises of it being so accurate to ancient egypt? (I'm not from Yugioh, so how would I know either way?) That it is a metaphor/retelling of the authors life and experience during the events of two world wars and the rise and fall of empires and emporours? About the cycle of history, that even if how depressing in retrospect seems to be moving, even if it all takes tragedy? - Nah, let's better talk how it reminds me of a prototype of all these grimdark shows with lots of nudity lol.

From Breaking Bad's Walter White who is driven to crime supposedly, while only being a power fantasy for both the viewer and charachter, to the as popular as it is forgoten Game Of Thrones, or even the ever so Classic Sopranos - it's funny to see how all the things were already atleast half a decade old (and probably a lot more, just read the Coun of Montecristo, which may be more relevant to a certain topic so lets just wait for that in a certain video...)

But for examples, we have the narrator figure, a quasi tragic yet at the same time clear figure for the reader to insert and feel powerful - he gets seduced by a beautiful women, get's access to the highest court, has an mystical origin (being a proto-Moses figure, but thats another topic), gets into serious yet allways non-lethal adventures, ending like cartoons with last minute saves and contrivances - his growing mysantrophy and cynicism only making him appear more cool for school.

I think maybe that's what I'm getting at - many "serious" shows today (or maybe ever? Guess I'm actually kinda uncultured so who knows) - seem in a lot of ways more childish than the silliest cartoons - atleast the later do their gags for their own sake, not to get a one up on the people that bullied and spiteted them, which the motivation for most of these shows are.

But what am trying to say? Am I shiting on the book? Nah just on the shows, and even then not really - still like the Sopranos, the only one I truly dislike is Game Of Thrones and am happy that I only saw a few scenes and moments passing by the family tv years ago before it was ok to dislike it. Still one will ask, what my point is? Well I think it is, what actually makes it different from all the anti-hero tv shows afterall?

And I think it's the universal project of trying to get through all history, to give a map of humanitys progress - in both ways of a map of something existing and as a roadmap - to show where and how it all can go.

This is lacking even in the Sopranos, which in the end just stews in it's cynicism and condemns the viewer for even identifieng with the family - "they are killers and bigots, how can you care for them, you don't even the ending" - no end in sight, in all senses, no message for the future or possible resolution - like Walter White dieing in some redneck nazi bunker having removed himself from reality as the only possible solution.

Yes this book also ends in a sad way, but as I said with one in which I saw hope - the burying of his books seems more than just a framing device, but a message, that the future can and was influenced by all his experience, even if it took hundreds and thousands of years.

Even if he buried them to the void, as we all do who post here and other places, without getting any attention, not even hate mail or spam. Maybe it will all be deleted in a few years, maybe some catastrophy will destroy it even if it was backed up by some magic ai computer, yet still one has this absurd hope of what if?

So as the song stops mid scene for the anti hero, maybe it will continue for it's opposite some day as unexpectedly?

Damn.

(Also the book is mostly mundane with no supernatural elements, yet there is a guy whose ability is to just magically stop bleedings, guess I can't escape Soul Eater references lol)

[oh-no-its-bird]

New Itama and the senju weed empire lore just dropped, the real reason he died in canon finally revealed,,,

[painandmovies]

Sorry to those of you who are misinformed but despite what the show says Malakai did not gaslight Amerie. This show's cringe a$s lines are generally nothing to take too seriously, but some of you do not know what that word means. Say he wasn't perfect, but what Malakai did was not gaslighting and it's clear that none of you have actually been gaslit if you think anyone treating you badly is them gaslighting you like it's a common descriptive verb. In season 1, I thought this show generally used teen-cringe language to be tongue-in-cheek, but words like narcissistic (s1) and gaslight are not just used as synonymous with lying and being a jerk.

[veerbles]

thoughts about dream thieves (and some predictions!)

After probably almost a decade of thinking to myself, I’m an adult who’d like to read more and also enjoys YA, I should finally pick up TRC, I finally picked up TRC. I finished Raven Boys and immediately started Dream Thieves, so I didn’t pause to gather my thoughts on the first one, but here I am now. Ready to unleash several K’s of words by using my limited information to analyze characters and make some predictions that may or may not come true.

• I really enjoy the whole magical-realism, bordering-on-alternate-dimensions theme, but I’m SO SORRY Cabeswater gives me the creeps. I can read context clues and infer from the fact that Blue and Gansey both love it that it’s not meant to be sinister? Probably? But like, talking forests and time loops and magical possessions have, in the history of literature, revealed ulterior motives. I’m mostly side-eyeing the way Adam’s sacrifice to Cabeswater immediately derailed his life and mental stability. It might just be an Adam thing. It’s probably an Adam thing. But like, if I were these kids I’d be a biiiit more wary of the scary time-defying magical land I stumbled upon.

• The sudden emphasis on how time is circular kind of came out of nowhere. There was definitely a point made in the first book about how time doesn’t flow the same way inside Cabeswater, but mid-second book the nonlinearity of time was suddenly a huge thing and all the Sargent seers made a point of how every prophecy is something that both happened already and hasn’t happened yet. I’m totally down with some time-fuckery, but I would’ve liked some more build-up. Also, is this meant to play into Blue’s prophecy? Adam’s visions? Gansey’s fate? Glendower’s fate?

• I was preparing myself for a long, drawn-out love triangle B-plot, and I’m glad it didn’t happen. I couldn’t tell if I missed some subtext and Blue’s intense attraction to Adam faded before their fight at his room, or if it was a direct result of it, but I like that their thing (he called her his girlfriend and I was kind of like… is she? Who established that?) was short and not too well-developed. I think it mostly served as a lesson that Blue can influence her fate, but she can’t run from it (“Why couldn’t it be Adam?”). 

• Also, I think the marketing of the first book did it a HUGE disservice. I have nothing against romance as a main plot and maybe I would have enjoyed that as well, but adventure and the found family trope have a much stronger pull. Was really glad the romantic relationships aren’t really the main focus (at least yet?).

• On the same note, these books are so far really good with show not tell. The numerous unspoken hints about the Blue/Gansey attraction did such a good job making me root for them. The slow progression from Gansey caring an inordinate amount about how Blue views him, to Blue dedicating large chunks of her time analyzing him and trying to figure out all of his layers, to Gansey definitely growing aware of his feelings but not doing anything explicit because of Adam… The boat scene with Orla was pure comedy, lmao. Tell me you’re 16/17 years old without telling me you’re 16/17 years old.

• The Blue/Adam “break up” scene was so good because it evoked true emotions in me. I think a reasonable percentage of teenage girls were once The One Girl in a group of guys, and Blue’s feelings of being treated differently because she’s a girl really hit right where it hurt. I think Adam’s inability to understand that she wants to be his friend first and a love interest later was so real. I also do think that this scene brought up multiple points and maybe Blue’s character would have benefitted from addressing each of them separately, even just in her own head. She feels left out because she’s a girl, and she feels he only views her as a Girl and not as a friend; she’s wary of his anger issues and feels she doesn’t know him; she has feelings for Gansey; she has an ominous prophecy hanging over her head. Ultimately, her saying he’s not “the one” is what hurt him most, because she hit him directly in the insecurities, but it wasn’t really the most interesting or impactful point. Who is Blue Sargent and what does she really want in a relationship (or in general?)

• I have a hot take, but don’t kill me for this. …Adam gives off real Peter Pettigrew vibes. I’M SO SORRY. I really hope he gets more character development later on, because right now he’s straight on the path to evil villain. Or, okay, maybe he veered off that path after his talk with Persephone and their quest to fix the ley line, but for a minute there I was like… My guy, I get where you’re coming from, but you’re slowly gnawing on the leg that you used to stand on. It’s okay to be mad at the world because you were handed a worse hand of cards, and it’s okay to want to climb your way up to prove your own worth. But a minute ago your whole point was that you HAD worth, and now you’re acting out because you feel worthless? Adam’s getting eaten away by his insecurities and thinking/saying/doing really uncool things to his friends, and it’s just Not It. At this point of time, I personally would not have made him Secret-Keeper of the house I’m hiding in.

• Direct follow up: Honestly? Gansey should punch someone. As a treat. Gansey certainly has flaws, but he’s also certainly the most self-aware of the whole bunch. He is continuously harder on himself than anyone else is hard on him, and trying to make things right, and he’s kind of getting stepped on by his best friends. Adam stole his most prized possession and sneaked away to do exactly what Gansey didn’t want to do on GANSEY’S search quest, and then took the offer of networking but spit it back in Gansey’s face, and admitted he’s going to fight Gansey for Glendower’s favor because he thinks he deserves it more. Ronan ALSO stole his most prized possession after letting Gansey clean up his messes, and didn’t even really apologize? Like, it’s somehow okay because after he stole it he wrecked it and then dreamed it back? Nah dude. It wasn’t okay you took it to begin with! Now, I definitely think it’s not a black-and-white situation; Adam brings up plenty of good points in his arguments, and Ronan, to the best of my recollection, never asked to be cleaned up after. They’re both super traumatized and Gansey chose to stick by their sides through that. But everybody else gets to lash out and make stupid decisions and I, personally, think Richard C. Gansey III should pull a teenage boy move and punch one of his best friends. Which one is up to him. The punch can be metaphorical.

• This book focused mainly on Ronan and Adam’s journeys, and I have to say I loved the night terrors as a symbol of self-loathing. But I remain unsure about Ronan himself. Unlike Adam I don’t think he’s doing villain-y things, but he’s definitely doing very normal teenaged self-destructive things. And that’s fine. It's expected. But it’s also not really productive to self-acceptance? Which he somehow reached at least partially by the end of this book anyway? My point being, Ronan kind of lost it when Gansey was gone and went on a weird dreamer-bender and took all kinds of suspicious drugs and made all kinds of bad decisions, and I expected that to have ramifications. He didn’t really face any of his self-hatred or made efforts to be a better friend. He did kind of face (literally) his grief over his father, which is obviously huge, but I would have liked him to take down some of those walls, be vulnerable, apologize? Face some of his obvious inner homophobia? Anything before that wholesome ending. I guess I just stay hopeful that it’d happen in the next two books.

• On that note, the whole goddamn Lynch family needs therapy. What the fuck. Hated Declan significantly less than the last book, but all three of them should get some professional help for their asses. Their mother is a dream? Ronan’s new friend’s mother is dating his father’s murderer?? Ronan’s dad kicked him out of his home on the heels of his tragic death to teach him some lesson about… dreaming??? So much shit happened in this book. However: loved the idea of Ronan having an actual parent and functioning sibling relationship now. Hopefully, that would do some good for everybody involved.

• Very happy at the subtle queer themes and foreshadowing that led up to Ronan’s very understated sexuality revelation. I could smell it coming from a mile away without it being spelled out for me, which is good: it means it was written into his character really well. I was both thrilled and kind of confused by some of the Adam/Ronan hints in this book, though. Ronan… slept on the floor by Adam’s bed…? ("Surely he would wake up soon and find himself [...] lying on the floor beside Adam’s bed at St. Agnes.") This was literally mentioned in one line and then never again. And he doesn’t spend too much time thinking of Adam, but somehow the epilogue still explicitly states that his secret is Adam and not his sexuality as a whole. I’m rooting for them, but I’ll need more convincing in later books that this apparent crush didn’t spring out of nowhere. 

• On the subject of themes I didn’t see coming, the redemption arc for The Gray Man with the gray morality surprised me. It’s not that I’ve never read or enjoyed books where this subject was explored, I just didn’t expect it to happen in this book series. It seems to me like so far every character we’re supposed to root for is very clearly that, and evil characters give off hints in advance. Gray Man definitely did some dubious things in this book, even if you disregard the killing itself, so I expected his ending to line up with that. I guess it still might? Truthfully I find the subject of responses to trauma and how it affects your moral compass very interesting, and I’m definitely into characters’ redemption arcs, but I just don’t know if romantic entanglement with a known dissociative killer is a smart thing for a mother of a sixteen-year-old. If the Gray Man drove away at the end and started a new, less-violent life, I’d be far less conflicted. But he very clearly stated his attachment to Henrietta, which just… leaves me mostly confused. 

• Speaking of, I love how a major theme of this odd little magical book is how different people handle childhood trauma (Adam, Ronan, Gray Man). No further notes, just love it.

• I also really like that adults are directly involved in this story, instead of being intentionally kept out of the loop like in most YA stories. In the majority of the YA books I’ve read I really felt like 70% of the problems could be solved by a whole ass grown up swooping in instead of letting a bunch of kids handle real life-endangering shit all by themselves. The 300 Fox Way women are certainly a specific breed of adults, but they are adults, and they do intervene when needed and are kept mostly informed. It’s a nice change of pace. 

• Going to quickly mention my only real point of criticism and then move on. The dialogue in this book isn’t very realistic, and the clear preference for dramatic chapter endings is a little excessive. I can forgive the dialogue issue, because it does help create the atmosphere that this isn’t a real place in the real world but a magical and intriguing town in some mystery land, but I don’t know if this is what the author actually intended. In every other way, the kids are all pretty well fleshed-out and realistic depictions of teenagers. But every time they open their mouths I think: this is not how a natural conversation sounds. And the dramatic chapter cliffhangers isn’t terrible, because it does keep my interest, but I think it’s fine to have a few chapters not ending with a dramatic one-liner, lol.

Predictions! 

Gansey is a reincarnation of Glendower’s. This is not a certain one, but if it’s not true I feel like it’s a missed opportunity. Gansey is constantly described as “both very old and very young”. He died, but mysteriously didn’t die. He has this connection to Glendower and for some reason connects his sense of self to him. It would tie in to the theme of nonlinear time. I think it could be a good ending for this journey, a la “the thing you were looking for was in yourself all along”.

Gansey answering with “That’s all there is” will have more meaning later on. It could be that dialogue thing again, but I found it to be a weird response in the context of that scene. Since I am of the firm belief that this is all heading to a Blue/Gansey kiss, Gansey dying and then undying, and Blue somehow walking him back down that corpse road, I feel like that quote could maybe tie in to that future scene.

Is Adam’s vision really “gone”? In the scene where Adam makes peace with his powers and returns to Cabeswater he remembers the vision from the dreaming tree and thinks: "That wasn’t going to happen now. He’d changed his future. He’d chosen a different way." And I simply can't help but think that that's just... too easy. Why mention the vision so many times if it's not going to happen now? On the one hand, it would be far more interesting if it did happen, but it had a whole different connotation to it than Adam can currently imagine (he specifically says Gansey is dying, not dead.) On the other hand, it does seem like that vision fits in the reality where Gansey dies back in the first book on Neeve's pentagon, if Adam hadn't rushed in and made the sacrifice. I just feel like it's going to make a comeback.

Noah should not be a ghost. There was not once a good explanation for why this happened. Because he died on the ley line? Presumably, if the ley line runs through the US, many people die on the ley line. Gansey’s backstory is that he came back to life from those hornet stings because someone else who should not have died has died. But Noah is like. Not exactly dead? I’m assuming this will need to be addressed later on and serve as some sort of plot resolution.

Persephone has a connection to Cabeswater. She essentially told Adam that she was in his place once (“They won’t understand,” Persephone said. “They didn’t when I came back.”). That lady has something weird going on with her and this tell me it will have some sort of connection to Cabeswater. She kind of gives off the vibes of someone who will get forever lost in a magical forest. Also I feel like maybe one of the psychics won’t make it out alive, and I dread it’d be her or Maura.

Artemus is definitely a Cabeswater creature. I think this was almost explicitly stated? He appeared suddenly and disappeared suddenly? Almost like the surges and outages the ley line causes? Also, I don't remember the specifics from the first book but I think Maura needed Neeve's help to find him because he was in that "place where they can't see", or something like that - presumably Cabeswater. Also, his story does not give human.

[risotto38]

So I'm taking an Indigenous History class

[rawliverandgoronspice]

did my part, removed some frustration posts, let's hold hands, ganondorf is very cute, kiss on the top of his forehead <3

[r4pira]

Hello! I hope this ask finds you well! Found your art by chance today and couldn’t resist ordering a print!! Wanted to say how wonderful your creations are - I’ve never seen anything like it (in the best way possible). The way your style is so vibrant whilst simultaneously surreal and almost melancholic is 🤌

If you don’t mind me asking (and are open to sharing ofc), how has your style evolved?

- lore

hey! thank you so much for kind words :D!!!

that's an interesting question - i'm not sure what part of the "evolution" you'd like to hear about more, but here we go 👇

i guess the short answer is "artistically evolving by striving to perfectly recreate the visions i have in my mind" but of course that'd be too much an obvious thing to say..

so, if we're talking more about the technical aspects.. at the "beginning", so like a year ago or so, when i realized i couldn't actually draw at all, i had (like anyone🫡)to learn some basics - anatomy, color theory etc. (keeping it very simple of course), but after that to get any satisfactory results what i really needed was to understand what was the precise thing that i wanted to express in my art. that could be done by 1. analyzing the art pieces i enjoyed 2. experimenting with brushes and filters 3. drawing a lot.. so i did👍 and while doing all that, i had to constantly remind myself to draw only the stuff i liked and felt passionate about and to do that only in a way that wasn't feeling too forced - that is to say in a completely amateurish style - and really, it's not like i had to be crazy academical about it. that thought, while being trivial, really helped me not to lose the sight of my Main Goal - to see the anime guys i liked looking and feeling exactly like i wanted them to :D and a couple of other things😉👍

the famous "drop the lineart" advice worked really good for me, and i feel like the real progress began only after indeed dropping it and focusing more on the painting process & i found it helpful just going with the flow when it came to choosing colors during painting and not shying away from throwing million filter masks on top of the final drawing - really, the filter masks are really fun (gradient masks, color balance tool, various layer modes, stuff like that), and the crazy colors really help to achieve the dreamlike look i'm aiming for..

so i guess my algorithm for "evolving" is extremely simple - 1. draw the suff you really feel strongly about while freely experimenting with the style 2. analyze the results 3. repeat with new knowledge

the more you draw the more attentive you get to the surrounding world (or at least how it looks like), and that gets you more and more things to artistically explore.. and so the process goes on🐣

thanks for the question! :D

[lucabyte]

making posts about headcanons that have basically no textual backing makes me itchy but someday i should probably elaborate on my opinion that "mirabelle being aroace is the one thing keeping her oblivious to the fact that the dormont house of change is the religious coven equivalent to fleetwood mac"

[alvadee]

funny how us americans always shame everyone who's online for not caring (as in posting about, no matter if the caring is genuine or performative) about the political event that is important to them right now but will gladly discuss movies, ships, their new haul, all that irrelevant day to day bullshit, without a care in the world when something goes down in the world the US isn't (yet) involved in.

[bayetea]

seeing non-black people critique rick's portrayal of black characters is interesting sometimes. only like 30% of the critiques I see make any sense to me to be honest

[theartofangirling]

.

[astronomodome]

sorry I don't want doc here either since he blocked people that informed him about palestine, for a "no politics" person he sure doesnt shut up

I get that, I was watching that when it happened as well, sure he was uninformed and there were some people trying to educate him who shouldn’t have been blocked, a lot of people were just yelling at him though in classic twitter fashion. Which may be a controversial thing to say but I don’t think shitting on him for not being aware of an issue is going to help him get informed about it, as he pointed out at the time

[hungergameshyperfixation]

I’ve seen AI images of Katniss and Peeta on Pinterest (like, painfully obvious ai) and all I have to say is that we truly need to re-embrace the art of shitty photoshopping. I’m begging. I cannot stand to see any more AI; I would literally rather see a million photo edits of Peeta and Katniss’s heads put over stock images, with a B&W filter over the image, and a white text caption in cursive font about love. I’d take 100 “cringy” imagines and personally frustrating fan theories over circulating AI image generated stuff.

At least those are all made by real people 💀

I guess you really don’t know what you have until it’s missing.

[1moreff-creator]

im in a Very Normal situation where im speedruning understanding lore so i can know whether i should vote for or against the psychological torture (i think that’s what it is) of a traumatized 12 year old girl.

(this is about milgram FBI don’t @ me)