#unfortunately my creative process is a lot of 'wait for it to come to me'

[mokeonn]

I love art and being creative so much but I really hate that low point in my story making process. Right now I'm trying to come up with the main plot for my story, my "defeat ganon" if you will, and it has been a huge nightmare. I am constantly coming up with the little details, smaller villains for arcs, and different cool concepts; without that "defeat ganon", I don't actually have anything to work with.

I basically have to wait until an idea pops in my head and I have a main plot idea down, then I have to refine everything to fit that idea, adjust the idea, and all that fun stuff.

But it's been a while since I came up with a story like this from scratch, so I completely forgot just how frustrating this period between coming up with concepts for the main plot is.

[honeyhotteoks]

a little update on what’s been going on with me (sorry in advance for the rambling) and a little preview for the next chapter of across stardust~

thank you all for being so patient and kind (as you always are) between my posts, i know sometimes it takes me months to return to something and it means a lot to me that i get so many kind and encouraging messages in those periods of downtime. as far as what’s going on with me…. i’m doing okay, but have been working really hard on my mental health and on myself in general over the past year or so. recently though, things with my adhd have been pretty challenging, work has been overwhelming, and one of the tests i needed to pass for that job i unfortunately failed and need to retake. it’s just been one of those winters i guess, but i know that’s led to me posting less here and even less on twt. on top of that…. and i’m honestly a little nervous to even write this, my therapist and i have been exploring the possibility of an asd diagnosis, and if that’s something you’ve ever thought about or experienced yourself as an adult, you know it can be a lot and bring up a lot of emotions.

i don’t mean to come on here and emotionally word vomit, but i guess over the years that i’ve been writing i’ve always tried to be honest about what’s up with me and what that means for my writing and my readers, so i wanted to do that. as you can imagine, it’s just been a lot of things to process and i’m only really writing in short creative bursts right now as compared to before when it was pretty constant. i’m working on prioritizing my mental health, keeping myself regulated, and hoping that the creativity comes along with it.

as far as what that means for my work? things are coming, just slowly as per usual. however, this past week and weekend i hit a good stride with across stardust and i’m feeling pretty confident that chapter two is almost ready. i’m hoping to get some time to myself to finish it this weekend so i can post it early next week.

as a huge thank you to everyone who has sent me kind messages about this fic in particular, there is a preview under the cut of the next chapter. please note, this is full of spoilers, so if you’d prefer to wait, just don’t click under the cut.

thank you, i love you guys, and i hope you enjoy!!

across stardust chapter two; preview

…

You find a home for his coat in the entryway nestled on a hook next to yours, his shoes already placed neatly side by side with your sneakers. It looks so right, your life against his, and you let your fingers skate down over the back of his coat as you take it in, a smile pulling at your lips. He belongs here, in every way, and for the next three days you’d pretend his presence in your apartment was permanent, solid and immutable in the way it feels in your heart.

His coat, his shoes, and in a flash you see it all, flickers of a real life together. Toothbrushes, coffee cups, letters in the mail, his keys kissing yours in a dish by the door, books slotted together on the shelf, clothes tangled up in the laundry basket.

Your chest aches with need, but he just walked into your apartment for the first time, so you shake off those thoughts and turn to him, “What did you have in mind for tonight?”

“Honestly,” He grins, “being able to talk to you face to face is as far as I let myself get,”

“Way better than texting,” You smile back, “you want a drink? Beer? Wine?”

“Sure,” He nods, “Beer?”

You nod and take the two steps into the kitchenette to locate glasses and two cans of beer, calling over your shoulder, “Make yourself comfortable, are you sure you’re not hungry?”

”I’m okay,” You hear him settle onto the couch and it occurs to you that you’ve never had a man in your apartment, at least in the sense of a romantic partner. For years you were going to their places, strangely protective of your own little haven between these four walls, and yet with Yunho you feel comfortable enough already not just to let him inside, but to give him your door code without a thought.

You blink at the realization, almost letting his glass overflow onto the countertop as you pour. How strange the last few weeks have been, how different you already are.

“How long have you lived here?” Yunho asks, and you let the thoughts about what it all means fade into the background as you turn towards him.

“Um,” You do the math in your head, “a few years? Almost four now,”

“It’s a great place,” He says again.

You leave the two empty cans on the counter and cross the room towards him, “Yeah,” you nod, “It’s small, but it’s nice and accessible, and in this area anyways I really can’t beat the rent,”

“Mm,” He nods, “I wish I could say I know what you mean, but idol life is strange.”

“That’s right,” You nod, “you don’t pay for your place?”

You settle onto the small couch next to him as he answers, “It’s part of our contract so it’s provided, but if we were to leave the group before contracts are up we’d owe the money back,”

You grimace, “That’s terrible,”

He nods but it’s with a slight shrug, “Some companies are worse, KQ being small has its benefits in other areas so that’s never been much of a concern for us,”

“That’s good at least,” You nod, “and they treat us pretty well, all things considered.”

“Did you ever work anywhere else?” Yunho takes a sip of beer and makes a noise of satisfaction at the flavor.

You smile and tuck your legs under you, angling towards him on the couch, “After cosmetology school I worked at SM for about a year,”

“And?” He asks.

“Awful,” You groan, “The pay was terrible, and the schedules were worse. It felt like being an intern,”

“And then you came to KQ?”

You sip your beer, nodding as you do, “Iseul and I went to school together, she got me in as soon as a position opened up, really vouched for me considering I had a smaller portfolio than she did at the time,”

“I’m glad she did,” He smiles warmly.

“What about you?” You ask, “Was KQ your first choice?”

He turns towards you on the couch, his knees pressed against yours and he rests one arm on the back of your couch, “Not initially,” he admits, “but I had two other competing offers, and something just didn’t feel right about either. Then I met Hongjoong, and I guess you know, that’s it,”

“A little bit of fate,” You smile.

“Mm,” He nods, “fate, maybe luck, I don’t care what it was, I’m just happy to be with you now,”

Your cheeks heat a little, and you look down at the popping bubbles on the surface of your drink.

”I just wish it happened sooner,” He admits, his hand sliding over the cushions to touch your forearm.

You nod and look back up, “I know what you mean, but, maybe that’s another thing fate got right, maybe we’re finally ready for each other now.”

He laughs, “What was the word Iseul used? Skittish?”

You sigh, “Yeah, she’s not totally wrong. I used to have terrible taste in guys, or maybe I wasn’t comfortable opening up, I don’t know, but,”

Yunho gives your arm a gentle squeeze, “I get it,”

You cock your head, asking him a silent question.

“I’ve dated a bit,” He explains, “and I always thought maybe it was me, but no matter how nice or compatible someone was on paper it was just…”

“Dull?” You offer.

He nods, “Like I was sleepwalking through it,”

Your stomach bubbles with a nervous thrill, your chest constricting with anticipation, “And with me?”

His mouth turns up in a small smile, eyes flicking from your eyes to your lips and back again, “I’m more than awake with you.”

“Me too,” You confess.

It’s quiet for a moment, Yunho’s thumb sweeping a soft line over the veins in your wrist, and then he exhales and drops his glass off on the table.

“Yun?”

He smiles at the abbreviation of his name and takes your glass away too, “As much as I want to talk all night, and I do, I think I might actually die if I’m not touching you after all these weeks,”

He reaches for you, wrapping his arms around your waist and tugging you over to his half of the couch. You squeak in surprise, bracing yourself with a hand on his chest and another on the cushions, but you end up pressed up against him and almost laying across his chest. Your body relaxes into him instantly, and Yunho lets out a relieved sigh. This, this is what you had been waiting weeks and weeks to feel again, the sureness of his body under your fingertips, the way your heart seems to slow and soothe with every touch.

“Anyways,” His voice cracks a little, a soft smile on his face, “you were saying,”

You’re nearly nose to nose, close enough to hear his breath, to feel the thump of his heart under your palm. His eyes flick over your face, his lips part, pupils dilating wider with every passing moment.

You try to remember where you were in the conversation, but with him so close and his hot hands on you, it’s all like a distant memory and you laugh lightly, “I have no idea,”

He grins, his hand brushing your face, the pad of his thumb tracing your cheekbone, and then without a single conscious thought you’re surging forwards to press your lips to his.

[queenie-official]

Chapter One: ‘To find a king’ Bridgerton Au!Anakin

a/n: some of this is going to be time accurate but i’m definitely taking creative liberties 😭 im not a historian so please don’t come for me if certain parts are unrealistic for the time (this goes for all future chapters as well btw)

you take a sharp breath in as the air is pulled from your lungs with the tightening of the corset. your lady-in-waiting finishes with one final tug on the laces that makes you huff in protest. “sorry your highness” She says in a brief whisper. “it’s quite alright Eleanora, you’re only doing your job” she nods in acknowledgment as she begins to put on your Pannier.

tuning back into the rather unpleasant conversation you where having with the man standing outside your bedroom door- Barclay your royal advisor had claimed the matter to urgent to wait for you to get ready before he spoke to you, Thus leading you to your current setup- “the people do not think you can rule without a king” he continues on with the same Argument you’ve been having with each other for days now.

“my father ruled by himself for years when my mother past” you counter while shuffling slightly so that Eleanora could put on your petticoats easier. “i’m aware your majesty but with all do respect, he was The king and you will be just a queen” as soon as the sentence leaves his mouth a bitter taste enters yours, glaring daggers through the door that you could only hope he’d sense. “i am not just a queen, i am The queen. its my birthright.” you state sternly as a final white decorative silk petticoat is placed on top of your other three petticoats. the process of getting dressed already aiding in your exhaustion that the conversation was providing you.

“i must remind you that you are not the queen yet. as of right now you are merely crown princess until your coronation day” he says matter of factly, god if your father hadn’t trusted him so much you’d have had him removed from the Castle effective immediately. unfortunately he was one of the only things aside from your own kingdom you had to remind you of him.

you had a feeling he knew this otherwise he’d be a lot less outspoken. regardless of all that you where still the soon to be queen and therefore had every right to put him in his place. “i’d choose your next words very carefully Barclay” it’s more bark than bite, the worst you’d do is send him off to his room for the day like a child who’d gotten in trouble for eating sweets before dinner but that didn’t make the threat any less real.

you hear Barclay take a deep breath, clearly trying to think of a different approach. “your majesty i of course see you as our queen, but the people not so much is what i mean. i think it pertinent to remind you the people must feel heard, and they want a king.” he tries and all you can do is scoff.

“utterly ridiculous, i am just as capable as any man” You reply curtly, moving your arms as Eleanora puts your dress on.

“it’s not necessarily that they think you ill fit, but you also must consider that a husband secures the throne..” your brows knit together in confusion at this admission. now standing impossibly still as engageantes where now being basted onto the elbow part of your sleeve, not wanting to get accidentally pricked from the needle. “secures the throne?” you ask unable to deduct what Barclay had been insinuating.

“with a husband comes the ability of an heir” a silence fills the air as he awaits your response. “oh” was all you could muster out as your mind now raced, how that had slipped your mind. You truly didn’t know but at the very least the need for a king made more sense in your mind now. Of course the people thought you fit to lead, but they also want to make sure you wouldn’t be the last.

“though that aside i think the people would trust you more with a man leading as well” Barclay said cutting off your string of thoughts immediately. you roll your eyes, wanting nothing more then to curse him out but you bite your tongue.

“he would not be leading- i would be leading and maybe i’d allow him to aid me” you say as Eleanora finishes, now just adding the final touches of jewelry and perfume. “your majesty-” he began clearly taken aback and slightly appalled by your statement. “Barclay” you cut him off, just wanting the conversation to end. “it is your most important role as queen to provide the people their future.” he chimes back, doing his best to redirect back to the main point of all of this.

you sigh, brows knitting together as you walk out of the bedroom now facing the Annoying man head on. “provide them a future by baring an heir- to place the weight of that on a child” you state slightly appalled at the thought. “you’ve handled it well” he points out, making your face sour.

“have I really..” you trail off, thinking back to your own childhood. you’d been blessed to have a father that tried to shelter you as long as he could. but of course there was a point where the truth was told and the weight of it all crashed down on you, at the time you weren’t sure if you would have rather known sooner. maybe it would of felt less world ending, then again you knew it wouldn’t have made it any easier to cope with. Having the entire kingdom of Alderaan watching your every move as you grew, a scary thought and even scarier reality you live.

“a husband then” you say forcefully pulling yourself from your own thoughts. Beginning to walk down the hallway with Barclay trailing after you. “correct” he says seemingly pleased with your sudden shift. though in your defense days of his constant blathering about finding a king had worn you down, at least you could say you put up a good fight. “easy enough i suppose” you say while mulling the idea over, keeping your head high as you walk towards the dinning hall.

“he must be of sufficient status” Barclay adds quickly making you pause and turn to face him.“how am i to find someone of sufficient status in such a short time between now and my coronation?” you ask in disbelief and frustration.

“well…” he starts clearly not having thought of that either. “whatever we do we’ll have to be discreet about it, if word gets out that you’re simply marrying a random Man just so he’ll fill a role- it would be a scandal. the people would question how much you truly care if you are to put a stranger on the throne beside you” he warns.

“well they wouldn’t have to worry about that at all if they just let me lead the way i wish. Without a King” you huff and yes you’re aware how childish you must be coming off, but come on marrying a man just to gain your people’s approval? it all seemed rather arbitrary. 

“your majesty.” Barclay says clearly annoyed, he looked like he was about to go on another tangent to explain why you must marry someone. the idea of having to listen to him go on and on again made a headache form and you quickly interjected before he could do so “yes i’m aware Barclay.. we’ll keep this a private matter for now, let’s not tell anyone including the royal council” you say reaffirming what he’d warned you about as you enter the dinning hall, honestly you weren’t even that hungry.

Between your conversation with Barclay and how tight your corset was you truly didn’t have much of an appetite at the moment. “it’s a matter of the people, for the people” he says surprising you. utterly confused you turn to him, giving your full attention. “i’m sorry didn’t you just warn me that if word got out it’d be a scandal?” you raise a brow at him, and he scoffs “i meant the people of Alderaan not the royal council” he states with crossed arms a unamused look on his face.

“my private life is non of their business” you say say with a glare, crossing your own arms mocking him. “your business is all of their business, you are the queen” he’s quick to point out and all you could do was laugh at the audacity. “i thought you said i was merely the crown princess? funny how quickly that view changes when needed” before he could fight back you hold your hand up silencing him. “we can discuss this more further later, currently i have more pressing matters to attend to. I mean it when i say we tell no one Barclay, not yet anyway.” you walk away before he can respond, off to do your duties for the day.

part 2

okay here’s chapter one🤭🤭 i hope you guys like it- i actually had a lot of fun writing this and researching certain things. this is going to be more of a reverse Queen Charlotte bridgerton story situation. 😗Anakin is going to be introduced in the next chapter, i’ve actually already got like two more chapters started so i’ll probably work on those tonight 😋 anyway i did go in with the intent to make this a one shot but quickly realized that was not gonna work if i didn’t want it to seem rushed 😭 so yea… anyways i think that’s all i had to say, have a good day huns Xx<3

[petalruesimblr]

Download Link: Sim File Share | MTS Name: The Crocus Nectary Description: Founded with a passion for the sweet harmony of nectar, Crocus Nectary has been a beloved haven for locals and travelers alike. Our diverse range of nectars from budget-friendly sips to exquisite vintages ensures that we cater to all taste buds. Embrace the art of nectar-making with our unique service, allowing you to craft your own blend for a day for a memorable experience! Need to rest those creative juices? We offer cozy bed accommodations for a relaxing break during the process. Come, indulge in the essence of Crocus Nectary – where dreams ferment into delightful reality! Price: 84,804 Lot Size: 30x30 Version: 1.42 Store Content: None CC Used: None Packs Needed: The Sims 3, World Adventures File Type: Package

This was the first nectary lot I created for the Sunset Valley world when I bought the World Adventures expansion pack. Originally 25x30, I changed it to 30x30 to make it easier for others to place it in their preferred worlds. I removed all CCs and decided to keep it exclusive for WA objects only. No spawners but it does have WA grapes, so your Gardener Sims can harvest them without traveling to Champs Les Sims. Unfortunately, all of them are normal to nice quality only but when I have more time on my hands, I will definitely get back to this and update it to perfect quality.

I placed a L'amour des Fruits Nectar Maker for your Sims to try making their own nectars and added a bedroom, bathroom, computer and fridge in case they get tired or hungry waiting for the nectar process to complete. I only placed 18 nectar racks to prevent routing issues because, for some reason, this lot is busy in my world almost every day.

This lot has been play-tested and I've used it in all my saved games. Let me know if you experience any problems on your end. Click on the link below for more information about this lot.

Outside:

Plants: Cherimola Blan Grapes Renoit Grapes Avornalino Grapes Meloire Grapes Cranerlet Nuala Grapes Gralladina Fran GrapesGrapevine

Decent parking lot with bike racks

1st Floor (Nectary Store):

Buyable and Tasteable nectar racks:Flavor Savor Nectar Rack The Necteaux

Public Bathroom

Nectary Register

Tables and chairs on the patio

Private testing area

2nd Floor (Nectary Making Area):

Bedroom > Bed, Dresser, Mirror, Seating area

Bathroom > Bathtub, Toilet

Fun > Computer, Bookcase

Small Kitchen > Fridge, Dining table and chairs

Empty nectar racks

Nectary Buy Debug Objects:L'amour des Fruits Nectar Maker

[tapeworrmart]

what’s your creative process like? asking bc i deeply admire the bloody and visceral quality of your art, but when i try to make mine similar it never really hits the same :(

Hmmm good question. Well first of all THANKS!!! Im glad it comes across as visercal as I want it to :)

My creative process usually starts when I get super inspired by a certain theme or media. This can be a song that makes me think of my OC or certain shots in a film or a pic on here of a great pose that I can apply to an idea I've had for a while that I haven't been able to figure out. Basically I keep myself constantly surrounded with things and input, I love watching films and listening to music and seeking out new stuff. That keeps my creative juices flowing. And once I have that bit of inspo I run to sketchbook and just get drawing. I think in order to capture gore and visercal stuff it's important to me to be in that mindset, music helps. Also idk I surround myself with a lot of dramatic media and stuff so I gave a good well of thoughts to dip into sometimes. And unfortunately whenever I try too hard it never works haha, so u just gotta be patient waiting for inspo to strike.

I think it always takes a lot of practice, I'm still not great all the time tbh, but I always know when something clicks right. It's down to having good references I think and inspiration. In terms of the art itself I try not to overwork a peice, as soon as I'm correcting or getting frustrated I know it's not gonna be what I want - which tbh has been happening a lot lately lmao - and I think using dramatic shadow and colour, and not being afraid of weird poses or or odd anatomy in order to fit the emotion in the art can help make things look more interesting too!

[subzeroparade]

How much do you write in one sitting? How much of it stays, how much of an effort do you have to make it pretty? Does it comes naturally? I've never been able to write up until very recently and I find myself constantly baffled by what I am able to write, but it takes such a conscious effort not to make it garbage, and I never know how much of it is palatable and not just idiotically purple for no reason. Do you deal with those thoughts? I'm asking because I admire how you write, just, so much.

Hi anon, I have no idea if this post on my own writing process helped you - I hope it did - but please do not doubt that it takes such a conscious effort not to make it garbage is a universal truth, and I get it. Writing is a craft, same as all creative arts. Anyone can dabble in it - and should, it’s part of being human - but honing your skill requires conscious (and sometimes frustrating) effort. To answer your questions:

How much do you write in one sitting?

Depends on the deadline I’ve given myself. I can plan to sit down for some light edits and churn up a few thousand words, but also vice-versa. I might say fuck it and cull half those words after, because they’re weak enough to be edited out entirely. I might write a poor excuse for a paragraph one day, but tease a whole, worthwhile scene from it the next. So: it depends. Quality over quantity. After furiously writing and editing, I recommend going away for a while - like, a week. When you come back you’ll find your perspective on what does and doesn’t hold up has probably changed. 

How much of it stays, how much of an effort do you have to make it pretty? Does it come naturally?

See above. Also I assume by pretty you mean good, compelling, readable. Rarely anything from the first draft is exactly intact when I publish - much of it has been reworked. Occasionally I have a moment of epiphany, so a sentence written in Draft 1 remains unchanged - because it does everything it needs to do - but they are few and far between, and I can pick them out for you myself from memory. One of the greatest lessons I learned (ironically from a fine arts prof but it 100% applies to writing) is that nothing in your first pass is too precious to destroy and redo, so don’t get attached.  As for whether it comes naturally, I think two things come naturally: 1) the desire to write (you are compelled to, or not, that's all. unfortunately the discipline to sit down and do it does not come naturally - for me, anyway). 2) the particular cadence of your voice, and so certain particularities in your prose. People who've heard me speak irl know that I have cadence and speech patterns that tend to match my writing. It's hard to undo that, so it's something to think about leaning into, and working to your benefit.

Do you deal with these thoughts (the question of how much is palatable and not just idiotically purple for no reason).

I did and still do, though less. I’d also argue that these thoughts, if channelled in a constructively critical way, are extremely useful. You should be asking yourself Is this good? Have I considered turning left instead of right at this plot point, and what would that mean for the story? Do I really need this turn of phrase? If I read this out loud does it transmit meaning, or does it sound like senseless decorative blather? You should have a roster of these questions ready (again, if your aim is to take a fine-tooth comb to your work and get better). I still cringe at shit I’ve written recently and think about paring down where I can, or rephrasing until it makes the impact I want it to. 

The best way to get perspective on this is to (wait for it) read. Read a lot. Read stuff that is beyond you, outside your preferred genre, both contemporary and not. Variety - consuming a vast amount of good work - is how you hone your critical eye. If you want to get better, look for things that will challenge you, and by extension inspire you. You don’t necessarily have to read only prize-winners or peruse literary mags for recs (though full disclosure, that’s what I do) but you might want to consider the roster of authors you turn to when you need to make stylistic adjustments, or are simply starved for inspo. For example: if I’m finding my output a little too monotonous, I will pick up someone hypnotic like Joyce Carol Oates, or baroque as Angela Carter. If my voice is getting a little “idiotically purple” - which it can - and I just need to fucking describe something and calm down, then it’s Hemingway (I hate him but he's really useful, sorry), or someone contemporary like Mark Haddon. What these authors have in common is they’ve all written something that feels like it has blown the back of my head out (wow sorry again that follows a Hemingway reference), and that’s the high I am always chasing when I am reading, be it for study or pleasure, because I want to hurt/love my own reader in that same way.   

Tldr; it takes work, it can be frustrating, but don’t stop. Don’t doubt yourself but do question your work, vigorously; have at it with the pleasure of knowing it can always be better, and it will be. Hope this helps :’)

[utilitycaster]

Hello there! I wanted to pop in again to thank you for answering my ask before in regards to Midst. After your answer I thought to start the first episode and see how I felt about it... and I ended up swallowing 12 episodes in a roll because I couldn't stop.

It has such a fantastically unique way to tell a story, like you're in a bar with 3 slightly drunk friends that can't quite wait for the other to finish telling their line.

If possible I'd love to hear your thoughts on the style of storytelling Midst uses and the worldbuilding of the podcast.

I'm so glad you enjoyed it! I do think with podcasts my advice ultimately lands on "just try a few episodes, it's free and not much time and you can do so while commuting or cooking or something" so I'm glad that worked out.

I am never very good at coming up with general discussions of storytelling style on the fly; I need a prompt or something narrower. I also am someone who's always loved works where the narrator breaks the fourth wall, having been exposed to them quite young (The Princess Bride novel, the A Series of Unfortunate Events books, my previous mentions of Ellen Raskin novels) so that doesn't strike me as unusual. It's a great creative choice, and doing so in podcast format really brings it to life, but it's not something that jumps out to me as unique. Similarly, rotating POV is something I'm pretty used to with various fantasy novels (Lord of the Rings, A Song of Ice and Fire, The Stormlight Archives, The Old Kingdom Trilogy) as well as plenty of fiction podcasts (notably the Silt Verses for this one). I don't want to sell Midst short but essentially they took two very established and enjoyable storytelling tools, and combined them incredibly effectively and with fantastic chemistry and improv skills and a very strong sense of narrative that is always prioritized. I think that's the thing about Midst's story, too - while there are some great science fiction ideas it's a fairly straightforward story structure, just done extremely well.

The worldbuilding is also hard to really discuss without more guidance because I don't know how they came up with it! The design of the cosmos is particularly weird, and I think Unend is going to give us even more weirdness. I think the improv allowed them to set broad parameters and then build a world that fit the story and the actual starting information was detailed enough to allow consistency and open enough to allow flexibility, which is important. I think the best way to sum it up, however, is with Bocs. I think about "It's bocs" a lot because we are on the "um actually if you don't explain the entire process of flax farming to the economics of linen garments you're a bad worldbuilder" website and "it's bocs" is just a breath of fresh air. You build the world to serve a story. We do not need to know the exact intricacies of how this specific mechanical/electrical technology functions. It's bocs. I think how bocs are handled is the best summary of both the worldbuilding and storytelling: this is a story made by three people who understand what is important to the narrative, and understand how to present it in the medium in which they're working.

[renthewriter1]

The creation of 'The Psychology of eight' , an important essay. Feel free to read if you have time to spare.

Back in early 2022, I came up with the idea to create something that I’d stick to for a long while. At the time, I was struggling with my mental health and needed something to use as an escape before it got worse. Desperate to prevent myself from causing serious harm to myself, I sat in my bed thinking for hours on end. Ideas poured into my head but none of them intrigued me enough to know it’d be what I’d cling on. I got tired of waiting for my brain to give me answers unfortunately. So I just sighed with disappointment and listened to music on my phone. That’s when it happened. For reference, I maladaptively daydream. And when does it trigger most? You guessed it: Listening to music.

Kurutto Mawatte Ikkaiten. That was the song I think. The more I listened in, the more my brain began crafting up a character dancing along to the melody like they’re in some sort of music video. Blue hair, Purple outfit.That’s what came first. Then the yellow eyes, the iconic captain hat that matches the colour of the outfit, and a legendary black cape. When the song was over, I sat there in silence for a moment. “This is it” I thought. “A sign” I also thought. I felt the urge to do something. I couldn’t just throw this away, even though it was just a character made based around one song. I wanted to take any opportunity possible to find permanent comfort. 

I didn’t do much about this at first, I was still processing it all. But… on January 3rd 2022.. That’s when it officially started. The creation of The Psychology of Eight. The blue haired character became a person known as the one, the only Aggro Vertreuse. At first I’d decided Aggro would just be a Gacha persona I’d have for a while, but after months of  hyperfixating and my confidence subtly being boosted each day, I thought. “This needs to be something more.Something bigger.” Yes, I wanted to make a fictional series, having Aggro Vertreuse be the main character. I did some experimenting, crafting up gacha tweening tests, small story writings,etc.

Between 2022-late 2023 was when I came up with the other characters. I recall it being in this order: Vivienne,Berry,Globo,Pofoyo,Roxy (Originally named Xixie before I changed it), Xeno, then last but not least Orion. Orion was originally named Ren, but I had to change it to prevent confusion. You see, I have the same name lol. But yeah. As I came up with the rest of the main character, it fueled my motivation and dedication towards creating a fictional series even more. I knew this was the best thing to in my life. A reason to keep living. Sharing my imagination and creativity.

Though I do have difficulties and struggles with creating art for various reasons, I’m still trying my hardest to put in as much effort as possible. I’m aware that a lot of my art may be low quality,lacking expression,etc. But that’s the best I can do for now until I improve. It takes time, y’know? The more I grow as the days & years pass by, the more I will be capable of showing the world the creativity I want to express. You have no idea how much I have bottled up inside of me, ready to share and bring happiness, intrigue, and excitement to people. But you will know one day, I hope. 

Back to late 2023 now, ahem. After finishing the pilot of TPO8 on AO3 I felt that it was the perfect time to start the development of a book series. The first volume. As often as I could, I wrote ideas then some chapters shortly after. Each being 6000+ words big. Unfortunately, between late january and this month, I completely lost motivation on creating the book. I still want to give my fictional story its own series though, don’t worry. I just can’t do it as a book series. My initial idea was to use the book series as a way to promote TPO8. But coming up to the time I promised to release this, I realized its not possible. The fanbase for my series is nowhere near big enough to make the book series happen. There would be purchases, but not many. I know there’s still a chance. Someone (likely a friend) could pick up the book and share it to others, meaning there’s a chance I could still go through with doing the book series. But there’s other factors preventing me from doing so; I’m too young for a bank account+depositing/withdrawing from said account,gaps in professional skills. To be honest of you, this was hard for me to write considering that I put so much effort into the 3 chapters I’d written, and being quite confident (overconfident) on releasing the first volume and making promises to others as such. Though, one thing I’ve learnt is that everyone makes mistakes. I assume its some sort of canon event to write something for a year, only to scrap it at the last second. I believe I will learn more from this experience, and work out when and how I’ll get this story out there. Maybe on the big screen, or little screens. Who knows? The future is yet to come. 

Don’t panic. I will find another way somehow. “But what about the chapters of the book you’ve already written?Is it going to get deleted?wasted away?” Nope. I will share the google docs containing the scripts at some point, or something similar. I would never delete my hard work,no matter what. After all, archival is better than deletion. Especially when it comes to fictional media. For the last part of this video/post, I will explain the plot of ‘The Psychology of Eight’ for those who don’t know:

The Psychology of eight tells the tale of eight significant characters. Aggro Vertreuse, a non binary ambivert who adores spending his time interacting+connecting with others,figuring out how to fix his mental health issues, shapeshifting, and causing chaos. Vivienne Boudica, a POC Trans woman who has a passion for literature,taking care of flowers,occasionally joining in with Aggro’s antics, and relaxing at coffee shops. Orion Williams, a genderless person driven by anxiety and uncertainty. He has a hard time trusting things+people, and keeping calm. Usually walks at a slow pace, and has a look of exhaustion on his face. Globo Sweetlocke, possibly the happiest person alive who spends their time spreading kindness, helping others, expressing her joy, and making balloon art. 

Pofoyo Utsagi, the second youngest member of the main cast who spends his time making the most of his childhood due to something that occurred in his past, afraid of it happening again. Xeno spiderwell, a genderfluid spiderperson with a heavily complicated backstory and puzzling mindset. Roxy, someone who seems like your average robot, but somethings off. Is there a real person hidden inside its “computery” mind?How did they get there?  Last of all, we have Berry Mercia.The youngest of the cast. How unfortunate that she died so young.

“Death?!Then how is she existing?!” This is where the main plot comes in. The thing is, all eight of the main characters are hypothetically dead, but…not..quite??? You see, they are a species of demon called a purgatory demon. A purgatory demon is a type of demon that used to be a human in a past life, but died due to health related complications/incidents, and had their spirit transported to a special galaxy that grants them magical powers that are the equivalent of the abilities a character would get in a dreamscape world. Not only that, but they are also granted immortality. Meaning they spend an eternity in purgatory. The group sees this whole concept of living forever and views it as a blessing for a while at first, but later realize it is also partially a curse in disguise. Some of them go mad with distress, some of them go into a phase of confusion and uncertainty.

Anywho, that was the basic synopsis of The Psychology of Eight. I cannot explain it any further as I do not want to give spoilers for the series.

I thank those who’ve taken their time to read through this post/video, I really do appreciate it. I created this message to help people understand my goal regarding TPO8, why it exists, and why I have such high levels of passion for it despite the inconsistency in posts about it. Though my content hardly gets noticed these days, I still hold the confidence that I will finally be noticed by a large audience of lovely people. I know I get low view counts that tend to range between 5-50 views , but nowadays I’m starting to care less about this. Because I know. I know that one day someone will take notice of my dedication of my creativity, and let their friends or whomever they care for about it. Thank you; For your time and patience.

[queenofbaws]

For project prompts/questions: 6 for bad moon rising (lol) and 8 and 17 for the Almosts! Truth serum would be INSANE at any point of the Almosts...

oh GOD ldkfjslkjflskdjf HAHAHA the snort i snorted.....................i rearranged the order of the questions for my own nefarious purposes, hope that's okay ;)c

(6) describe the premise/plot of [project] from the perspective of each main cast member.

the plot of before the dawn, a bad moon rising by all those involved would do a little something like this - a-he-he-hem!

jack and the hacketts: a routine monster hunt becomes a babysitting mission. the babysitting mission becomes a hostage situation. the hostage situation becomes out and out war...and then reverts right back to babysitting. oh, and also? the worst cardio of their lives. sure. why not. this might as well be fucking happening.

the blackwood kids: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

(17) do you have a specific structure or method of plotting for [project]? what does your drafting process look like?

my method for plotting the (almost)s was - unfortunately - the same method i use for all my big fics! namely, uh...i had...so many documents.

my outline, which was a fleshed-out skeleton of the main beats each chapter would hit, and what info absolutely HAD to be there

the working fic itself, meaning the chapters i was working on at the time - because i am mentally ill and work on aaaaabout 3 chapters at once at any given time, lol

my snippets, which were scenes i had already written out of chronological order, simply waiting to be slotted into place

scraps i ended up taking out if they didn't fit the way i wanted them to/no longer worked with the overarching story as a whole

usually, when i'm drafting, i'm coNSTANTLY refreshing my outline as i work on getting the biggest, juiciest scenes out first, then everything else comes after, and it sort of becomes the narrative version of piecing a puzzle together! fitting connections between major plot points and making little shifts where they're needed!

(8) what are your favorite character dynamics from [project]? elaborate on why. what scenarios not followed through with in-story would you want to put each dynamic in most? (ex: truthserum-ed and locked in a room; roadtripping; coffeeshop au; etc)

man..........don't get me wrong. clearly. i am. Unwell™️ about all the main dynamics in the (almost)s, but if i had to pick one i'm the MOST unwell about, it's for sure josh and ashley's friendship. i really, really feel like it's a friendship that gets overlooked a LOT by the fandom and i don't know why* because it's just...so...JUICY??? there's so much josh and ashley have in common that gets brushed past (they're both creatives, they have artistic aspirations, they're lame, they take the curtains being blue way too seriously, you KNOW these bitches have mastered the kubrick stare), but then they're also such heartbreaking foils of each other that it just. makes me. a little crazy. i think some of that crazy spilled out in the (almost)s. i sure hope it did. because i feel like it's now my job to infect people with it aslkdjfalskjdfaklsjfk

and while my REAL answer to the second half of this question is i wish i could've just had ashley and josh snowed in at the lodge until they fuckin worKED SHIT OUT ONE WAY OR THE OTHER, i have to be...so real right now. all i saw. in my mind's eye. was. THIS.

(under the cut for comedic effect)

[shinycupcakebaker]

Chapter 1: The first meeting

Pairing: Robert "Bob" Floyd x reader (nicknamed Siri) 

Summary: You find out Natasha is in San Diego and has a possible job opportunity for you. you surprise her with a visit and meet Bob.

CW: A couple of swears.

WC: 6.1K

~A year ago~ 

It was nearly midnight and here you were, sitting in your small one bedroom apartment, going over the menus for the upcoming week and events. You scrolled thru the recipes, making adjustments here and there, knowing that the pastry chef would probably just go thru it again and scrap all the hard work you put into it. You hung your head and rubbed your temples as you search for a new job had so far proven fruitless. 

Just as you were about to shut down your computer, your phone chimed with a new text message. Smiling as you saw the familiar name and quickly replied. 

  Bratty Nattie: You still awake? 

Y/N: Yeah, unfortunately. Going over menus. 

Bratty Nattie: calling… 

You rubbed your eyes as Natasha FaceTimed you and answering the call, propping your phone up against a water bottle. “Hi brat! How are you?”  

“I’m good. How are you?” Nat asked, noticing that looked frazzled. 

“I’m gonna pull my hair out. Marc-Antony is an ass. I used to love what I did, but he just makes me hate it now. There aren’t any jobs here.” Hearing loud shouts come from behind Nat. “Where are you Nattie?” 

“The Hard Deck, it’s a bar here in San Diego.” Nat looked back over her shoulder, into the bar.  

“Wait, what?! You’re in California!? When did you get there?” You rubbed your hand across your forehead. Picking up your phone and walked to your bathroom. Propping your phone up on the counter as you removed you contacts and put on your glasses. “Did I miss the family email? Did you even send one out?” 

“Got here about a month ago.” Shaking her head, Nat chuckled. “No, you didn’t miss the family email. I haven’t sent one out yet.” 

“Excuse me, Sissy!!” You yelled and picked up phone, heading into you bedroom. Flopping down on your bed, you laughed with Nat. “Shame!! Do Mom and Dad know?” 

“Well, of course they know. I’ve just been busy with training and shit.” Hearing a door open behind Nat and a bespectacled man walks out. “Hold on Y/N. Bob, you’re leaving?” 

“Yeah, I have something I have to do. I might be back. Sorry, for interrupting your call.” Hearing the muffled reply as Nat held her phone close to her chest. 

“It’s okay Bob. It’s just my sister. Have a good night.” Nat flipped her phone out, showing Bob that it was no big deal. You smiled and awkwardly waved at the man that appeared suddenly on the screen. He smiled shyly and gave a small wave before heading to his vehicle. 

“Nat… Nattie!!” You yelled, getting her attention back to the phone. “Who was that?” 

Waving her hand non-chalantly in the air. “My back seater, Bob. But the reason why I’m calling you is because I might know of a way for you to have your own bakery.” 

You sat up and stared at Nat, blinking rapidly, trying to process what she just said. “I’m sorry, what? My own bakery? How?” 

“Well, there is this bakery, right outside the base, it’s amazing. The owner is getting ready to retire, his father opened it when he was like in his 20’s and gave it to him when he retired. None of his kids want the bakery and he doesn’t want to sell it to some corporation that’s just gonna ruin everything he built. It’s been around for nearly a century. I told him that you’re a pastry chef and looking for a new and better job opportunity.” Nat rambled on about the bakery. “And he’s kinda wants to meet you.” 

“Oh my god.. Natasha!!” You stated at her wide eyed.  

“What!? You are always complaining about your job now. How you don’t get any creative say in anything. Now, you can. And you make such amazing cakes and cookies and everything. BTW, when are you gonna send me some?” 

Laughing, shaking your head. “Well, send me your address and I’ll box some up for you. And you’ve given me a lot to think about.” 

Nat shrugs and smiles. “I know. I’ve already sent you an email with all the owners information. Call him when you get the chance. And I just texted you my address. I want your salted caramel chocolate chip cookies.” 

“Yeah maybe.” You yawned and glanced at the time. “Shit, I gotta get to sleep. 5am comes quick.” 

Nat nods and smiles. “I know. Just think about it, okay.” 

“Okay sissy. I love you.” You laid back in your bed.  

“Love you too, Y/N.” Nat waved and blew you a kiss as a tall, dark haired mustachioed man flung an arm around her shoulders. “Good night.. Nope, Roos….” 

The call quickly ended and you laughed. Sinking back into your pillows, your cat Simba curling up next to you and thought about the proposition that Nat just presented to you.  

You tossed and turned all night, unable to sleep with all the thoughts coursing thru you head. You groaned when your alarm went off at 5am, smacking your phone to make it stop. Kicking the covers off you in protest, you slowly slide out of bed and stretches. You stumble into the bathroom, starting the shower and quickly brush your teeth. Before hopping in the shower, you put in your contacts and close the door, so Simba doesn’t bother you. You rush thru your morning routine, eager to get to work and talk to your boss. Slipping on your sneakers, you grab your work shoes, a muffin and your water bottle as you run out the door, locking it behind you. Slipping down the stairs and out into the morning rush as you head to the train station. The train arrives about 5 minutes later and you enter as you think about what you are going to tell your boss. You have about 2 weeks of accrued vacation time plus about a week of PTO. Right now, it’s not the busy season so you should be able to take a weekend off.  

You exit the train at your stop, walking a couple of blocks to your job and head inside. You flash your badge to security and head back to the kitchen. You flag down your boss, Miranda, letting her know that you needed to speak to her. You start on your daily tasks, getting everything set up and dove into your first order of the day.  

Around noon, you took your lunch break and headed down to Miranda’s office. Knocking on her doorframe, she waved you in as she spoke on the phone and you sit in the chair opposite her. She hangs up and greets you. 

“Hey Siri, what did you need to talk to me about?” Miranda sits back in her chair, smiling softly. 

“Well, I need to use some of my PTO. My sister is in California and I need to go out and see her.” You fidget with the buttons on your chef coat. 

Miranda sits up slightly, leaning her elbows on her desk. “She okay?” 

You sigh softly, nodding. “Yeah, she’s fine. Didn’t know she was out there. Apparently, she’s been there for about a month. But… ummm…” You pause, trying to figure out how to word everything properly and it just rushes out. “She told me about a really great job opportunity for me out there and I kinda want to check it out.” 

“Oh… Well, that’s new. When were you thinking about going?” Miranda sits back in her chair, hands folded. 

“As soon as possible. I don’t know if it’ll work out but come on. I love working for you. And Marc-Antony is an amazing pastry chef but I’m not getting anywhere under him. He’s always undermining my work. This is just something I want to check out.” You explain everything to her. “He has 4 interns and 3 other chefs under him right now, plus Beth and Cathie both are competent in their knowledge of the patisserie.” 

She sighs and nods, “I know Siri. You are an amazing pastry chef. I would hate to see you leave us but if this is really something you want to pursue, let me see if I can move around the schedule and you can have next week off.” She turns to her computer, clicking a few different tabs and starts to review everything. “You are off this Saturday and Sunday but let me see what I can do. I let you know by the end of your shift.” 

“Thank you so much Miranda. Even if it’s only a couple of days next week, that would be amazing.” You smile and stand up from the chair. 

She stands with you and grabs your hand. “You truly are an amazing pastry chef, no matter what anyone says. Your cakes are impeccable, and I would kill to have your ginger peach scone recipe.” 

You squeeze her hand, smiling brightly. “Thank you Miranda. That means a lot.” You head back to the break room, feeling lighter, to scarf down the half muffin you never finished on the train ride. Opening your locker, eating the muffin half and gulping down the rest of your water before clocking back in for work. 

You headed back to your station, feeling lighter, and set to work on coloring fondant and making royal icing for the next batch of cookies to be decorated. You were so engrossed in your work that you didn’t see or hear Miranda come up next to you.  

“Hey Siri, I just wanted to let you know…” You jump hearing her voice so close and turned to look at her. “Sorry about that.” 

Stepping slightly to the side and turns to her, chuckling softly. “It’s okay. Sometimes I’m so into my work I don’t hear anything around me.” 

She nods, understanding. “I get that. But I just wanted to let you know that I was able to shift some things around and get you time off until Thursday. We will need you back for Friday tho. We have that big wedding and it’s all hands on deck.” 

You beamed and quickly hugged her. “Thank you so much Miranda!! This is amazing.”  

  “You’re welcome Siri.” She smiled and laughed. “Start cleaning up your station, it’s nearly 5:30. I'll see you tomorrow.” 

You nod as you start to clean up. “See ya tomorrow.” Filling piping bags with royal icing, securing them and placing them in your bin. Setting your bin on the shelf behind your station, you clean and sanitize your table for the night. You put away your other work bins, leave a note for the bakers in the log and clock out.  

Catching the train home, you stop at the small grocery store a block from your apartment and pick up the ingredients to make scones and cookies. While in the grocery store, you sent a quick email to your financial advisor and looked up flights to San Diego. Checking out, you practically skipped home. It seemed like everything was going to be working in your favor.  

The next few days seemed to fly by. You managed to book a decent flight to San Diego leaving Sunday morning, arrange for Simba to be looked after by your sweet older neighbor in exchange for some muffins and scones and book a hotel for your stay. Your financial advisor had called you and you told her about the opportunity that had arisen. She advised you that she would make sure everything would be all set if this was something that was really going to happen.  

Saturday came and of course you woke up early. Instead of trying to fall back asleep, you set to work packing a carry on and baking some sweets for Natasha. You had texted back and forth a couple of times over the past few days but you didn’t tell her you were coming out. You wanted it to be a surprise. As you set the timer for the cookies, you called the bakery owner and set up a time to meet on Monday morning. He had received your resume and was impressed with what you had accomplished in your short culinary career. You thanked him and couldn’t wait to meet him. Hanging up with him as the timer went off and pulled the cookies out of the oven, placing the next batch on the rack. As the cookies cooled, you set to work on your ginger peach scones. You continued to bake all thru the morning and into the late afternoon before you noticed the time.  

“Shit.” You mumble to yourself as it was nearly 5pm. Glancing around at your crowded counters and kitchen table before grabbing some Tupperware containers from your hall pantry. Filling one with some muffins and scones for you neighbor, another on for the bakery owner to sample and 2 more for Natasha filled with cookies, muffins and scones. You placed all the containers, save for your neighbors, in a reusable grocery bag and set it by the door. You cleaned your kitchen and start to make dinner.  

Just as you set the pasta in the water, your phone was ringing with a FaceTime call from Natasha. Answering it quickly as you sat down in your oversized chair. “Hey there Nattie.” 

“Hi Sissy. How are you?” She smiled. 

“I’m good. How are you?” Noticing it’s all dark where she was. “Wait, where are you?” 

“Yeah, about that.” You notice her wincing slightly as she shifted. “The hospital. There..” 

You interrupted her, “Wait, I’m sorry… What the fuck!? The hospital!! Are you okay?! What happened Natasha?!” 

“Y/N, calm down. I’m fine. Just a couple of scrapes, bruises and bumps. They are keeping us overnight for observation, but a really am fine.” She explained. 

“Us? Who’s us?” You questioned, getting up from your chair as you walked into the kitchen to drain your pasta. Propping up your phone on the counter as you finished making your dinner.  

“Bob and I.” She sighed softly as a nurse came into the room, Natasha shaking her head and turned her attention back to you. “We were doing training for a mission and we had a bird strike. Bob and I had to eject. But I swear Y/N, I’m okay. Just a little sore. I just wanted to let you know since you didn’t answer your phone earlier. You’re my emergency contact after Mom and Dad.” 

“Shit!! I’m sorry Nattie. I’ve been baking all day. You know how zoned out I get.” Frowning as you scroll thru your phone and sees the missed call from an unfamiliar number.  

Natasha laughs and shakes her head. “Yeah, I know. The place could be burning down around you and you wouldn’t even notice until your door was busted down.”  

You hang your head and laugh, “Shut up brat. That was one time. And it wasn’t even that bad!”  

“Well, I just wanted to let you know that I was okay. Just in case you got a text from Mom and started freaking out.” She yawned. 

Your phone chimed with a text from Mom as she was talking. “And speak of the devil, there’s a text from Mom now. I’ll let you go, get some rest sissy. Love you.” 

“Love you too sis.” You hang up with Natasha and reply back to you Mom. 

Momma: Just wanted to let you know that Natasha is in the hospital but okay. 

Y/N: Thanks Momma. She told me, just hung up with her.  

Momma: That’s good. How are you doing sweetie? 

Y/N: I’m okay Momma. Been working like crazy but I have a couple of days off. Might have a new job opportunity.  

Momma: That’s wonderful Y/N/N. Tell me about it. 

Y/N: We’ll, Nattie told me about it. A bakery owner near her is retiring. And he doesn’t really want to close his bakery. Nor does he want to sell it to a big corporation. I’ve already called him and I’m meeting him on Monday. Don’t tell Nattie. She doesn’t know I’m meeting him or that I’ll be there in San Diego. I wanna surprise her.  

Momma: That sounds wonderful Y/N. I won’t say a word to Natasha.  

You stir the sauce in to the pasta and text back your Mom.  

Y/N: Thank you Momma. About to have some dinner. I’ll talk to you soon. Love you. ❤️ 

Momma: Okay Y/N. Love you too. ❤️ 

You add the grilled chicken and roasted broccoli to the sauced pasta and mix everything together. Scooping some into your bowl, you head to the couch and sat down. Simba was instantly at your side, begging for chicken as you started to eat and go over your checklist. You had everything packed except for a few toiletries. You wrote out instructions for Simba’s care as you finished up dinner. Cleaning the kitchen, you packed the leftovers into small containers, placing them in the fridge and started unplugging all the unnecessary appliances. Making your way to the bathroom, you double check everything and decide to call it an early night. Brushing your teeth, you set up everything you would need in the morning. 

You laid down on your bed, relaxing with Simba and set your alarm. You knew you had at least an hour or more of travel before you got to the airport, so you wanted to be well rested as you hated to travel tired. Doing that one too many times had taught you a valuable lesson when you ended up stranded at the airport for nearly half a day once. You flipped thru the TV channels before finding something to watch as you fell asleep, popped a few melatonin gummies and set the sleep timer on your TV.  

You woke up the next morning a couple of minutes before your alarm went off and snuggled with Simba before it did. Turning the alarm off, you climbed out of bed and popped in the bathroom room to get ready for the day ahead. Showering quickly, you grabbed the small toiletries bag and placed it in your carry on as you get ready. Double checking that you had everything packed, you zipped up your bag and placed it by your front door. You fed Simba and grabbed the instructions for him and the Tupperware container, heading across the hall.  Knocking on the door, you waited as your neighbor shuffled over and opened it.  

“Hi Miss Parker. I just wanted to give you the instructions for Simba and a little thank you gift for checking on him.” You smiled at her. 

“My dear, you didn’t need to do that.” She shook her head but graciously accepted the container. 

“I know how much you like my muffins and scones. It’s the least I can do since you won’t take my money.” You laughed and kissed her cheek. “You still have my spare key, right?” 

“Of course I do dear.” She held up the key with the small acrylic muffin keychain. “You have a safe trip.” 

“Thank you Miss Parker. I’ve already fed him this morning, so you won’t have to check in on him until tonight. I’ll be leaving in about a half hour.” 

“Okay dear. Thank you for the muffins.” You nod and head back into your apartment. Grabbing your laptop, all your chargers, and your phone, packing everything into your personal bag for the plane. Double checking  that you had everything, you grab your bags and head out the door. Making your way to the subway. You had to make a few transfers but you were soon on your way to the airport. Your flight wasn’t until about 11:30am but you wanted to get there early enough to find your gate and relax until you had to board.  

You arrived at the airport at about 9:30, giving you enough time to check in, get thru security and grab a quick bite to eat. Stopping at a Dunkin Donuts in the terminal, a large Salted Caramel cold brew and a bagel with cream cheese, and headed down to your gate to wait. You sat down in a somewhat quiet corner, sipping your coffee and pulled your phone from your bag. Confirming your shuttle from the San Diego airport to your hotel, you did a quick search on what else there was to do. You figured you see what the city had to offer if you were possibly going to be living there soon. Browsing thru different websites, you got the idea what you could do in your free time.    

The hour passed quickly and you were soon boarding your flight. You sent a quick text to your mom to let her know that you boarded the plane and on your way to surprise Natasha. She was excited for you, you hadn’t seen Nat in nearly 2 years, and she wished you luck with your meeting on Monday. You let her know that you would keep her informed of everything going on and quickly shut down your phone as the plane began to taxi. 

The flight was uneventful and you made it to San Diego a little ahead of schedule. Gathering your bags you head out of the plane and onto the concourse to find your shuttle to the hotel. Once at the hotel and after checking in and unpacking, you forced yourself to take a quick nap to try and stay ahead of the jet lag.  

You woke up as your alarm went off, sitting on the edge of the bed and checked the time. It was nearly 5:30, perfect time to go and find your sister. You arranged for an Uber to take you to The Hard Deck, quickly freshened up and grabbed your purse and bag before heading down to the lobby to wait. 10 minutes later, you were on your way to the bar. On the ride over to the bar, you were suddenly anxious. Wiping your hands on your jean shorts as you arrived, thanking the driver and exiting the car. You stood outside the bar, shaking out your hands as nerves overcame you again. Walking inside and up to the bar, the woman behind it smiled warmly and set a napkin in front of you.  

“What can I get you?” She greeted you as you sat down on a stool.  

“I.. umm.. Sorry. I’m okay right now. Just looking to see if someone is here yet.” You shook your head and smiled back at the woman. 

“Who are you looking for?” She leaned over against the bar. “I know most of the regulars.” 

“Umm… My sister, Natasha Trace.” Scrunches your brows together, realizing that she’ most likely known by her callsign. “Umm.. sorry, Phoenix. She’s a pilot with the Daggers.” 

“They aren��t here yet but will probably arriving soon.” The woman stood back up and narrowed her eyes at you. “You must be Y/N. She’s told me a little about you. I’m Penny, owner of The Hard Deck.” Holding out her hand to you. 

You shake Penny’s hand and let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding, smiling. “Yeah, that’s me. Maybe you can help me. She doesn’t know that I’m here. I didn’t tell her that I was coming out here. I mean, she knows that I will be here eventually to check out Caroline’s but not when.” You ramble on. 

Penny places a hand on yours and squeezes lightly. “Breathe Y/N.” You take a deep breath and shake your head. “How do you want me to help?” 

You shrugged slightly and bit your lip. “I’m not sure. I have something here for Nat. Some of my cookies and scones. She’s been wanting them.” 

Penny holds her hands out and you give her the containers. “Give me those, I have an idea. You go and wait over by the jukebox. Your back will be to the entrance. And here.” She slid a cup over to you. “Water. Relax.” 

“Thank you.” You take the water, sipping it slowly as you make your way over to the jukebox. You were browsing the song titles when you heard a ruckus at the entrance. Glancing over your shoulder, you see Natasha enter the bar with a group of loud men. You set the water down as you heard Penny call out.  

“Hey Phoenix. I got something here for you.” She shouted over the ruckus.  

You watched as Phoenix approached the bar and took the containers from Penny. She opened the top container that held your salted caramel chocolate chip cookies. “Penny, where did you get these?!” As a tall dark hair man reached for a cookie, Phoenix smacked his hand away and closed the container. Penny glanced over her shoulder towards where you stood by the jukebox. 

Phoenix looks around the bar and in the direction Penny looked, her eyes widening. “Y/N!?” She set the containers on the bar and ran over to you, hugging you tightly. 

You laugh and hug her back, mumbling. “Surprise sissy.” 

“What the fuck are you doing here?” She pulls back and smacks your arm. 

“I managed to get a few days off. I have a meeting with the owner of Caroline’s tomorrow morning.” You rub your arm and smile brightly. “I wanted to surprise you.” 

Phoenix hugs you again, sniffling slightly. “Well, shit!! You did surprise me!!” 

You pull away from Phoenix slightly and wipes the stray tear from her cheek. “Don’t get all weepy on me now Nattie.” 

She rolls her eyes and nudges you with her shoulder. “Come on.” She links your arm with hers and starts to walk over to the pool table. “Let me introduce you to the Dagger Squad. Fellas..” She cleared her throat. “I want to introduce you to my sister, Y/N. That’s Fanboy, Coyote, Bagman and Rooster. Where’s Bob?” 

The tall blonde she said the Bagman, grinned, handing his pool cue to Coyote and walked over to the two of you. “Jake or Hangman, actually.” He looked down at Phoenix. “He was finishing up some paperwork last I saw him. Didn’t know you had a sister Phoenix.” 

Phoenix rolled her eyes again and shook her head, leading you away from him when Fanboy spoke up. “Her picture is in her locker with all her others. Hi. I’m Fanboy or Mickey.” He gave a small wave and smiled. 

You smiled back and sat with Phoenix near the pool table. “So, how long are you here for? And how the hell did you manage this?” 

“Until Thursday. My boss was able switch a few things around and got me the days off.” You grinned. “I told her about my opportunity out here and she wished me luck.” 

Phoenix grabbed your hand and squeezed it. “You are gonna love Caroline’s. It’s so cute and they have the best lemon poppyseed scones. Do you want something to drink?” 

You shook your head. “I have water for now. So, tell me about your back seater? Better than your last one?” 

She laughed, shaking her head. “Bob is Bob. He is an amazing WSO. A bit shy, not cocky like Hangman there. Quiet, almost stealth like. You don’t even realize he’s there sometimes. Takes everything in, always observing. A great guy to talk to. He knows his shit. It’s like it all comes naturally to him up there. Is always on top of things.” She slides off the stool and heads towards the bar. “I‘ll be right back.” 

“So, you’re the one that bakes the cookies Phoenix can’t shut up about.” The tall dark-haired man named Rooster said as he sat down on the other side of you. 

“That would be me. Rooster, right?” He nodded. “Brought her some. Maybe if you’re nice, she’ll give you one or half of one.” 

Rooster brings his hand to his chest, “You wound me. I am always nice. It’s that one over there you gotta watch out for.” He motions towards Hangman with his beer bottle. 

“Y/N, this is Bob.” You turn in your seat and stand quickly, not realizing how close Phoenix and Bob were when you were suddenly all wet. 

“Shit…” The cup that Bob was handing was suddenly at your feet, its contents running down your shirt and legs. “I’m sorry… Let me.. I’ll get you some napkins or a towel.” 

He hurried off to the bar and you laughed softly. You sat back down as you heard Hangman, mumble something to Coyote. Raising an eyebrow to him as Bob returns with some napkins and a dry rag. “Hey, it’s okay. It was just water, right? I’ve had worse spilled on me.” You smile softly up at the bespectacled man, taking the rag from him. You wipe off your legs and scrunch your shirt into the rag, drying off. Bob sat down where Phoenix was once sitting and Phoenix shooed Rooster out of his seat beside you. 

“Again, this Bob.” Phoenix smiled, introducing you again. “Bob, my sister Y/N.” 

You sat back down, shifting towards Bob and smiled shyly as you tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear. “Hi Bob. How are you? Nat mentioned the other day that you both had to eject because of a bird strike.”  

Bob nodded, looking down at his hands before looking back up at you. “Yeah, we did. We’re okay tho. Just some bumps and bruises. Wasn’t too serious.” 

You scoff at him. “Serious enough to keep you both overnight.” You reach over and place a hand on his arm. “Don’t diminish the seriousness of anything that might happen.”  

Bob shook his head as pink slowly crept up his neck. “Never. I.. uhh.. I would never.” He adjusted his glasses, looking back at you. “It wasn’t the first time I’ve ejected and probably won’t be the last. But.. umm.. Phoenix tells me that you’re a pastry chef.” He quickly changes the subject. “That you make the best cookies and scones.” 

Glancing back at her, and nods. “Yeah, apparently, she’s been telling everyone. Maybe I’ll let you try one of my cookies.”  

Bob choked on his water as it was now your turn to blush. Heat crept over your cheeks, and you hung your head. “I’m sorry.. that came out very sexual..” Bob placed a hand over yours, sending a shiver up your arm and down your spine. 

He grinned and chuckles softly. “It’s okay. Don’t be sorry. I’d love to try one someday.” 

You and Bob continue to make small talk throughout the night. He told you about why he became a WSO. And you told him why you became a pastry chef. You both seemed to have similar interests. You were about to excuse yourself to get some fresh air as the bar was becoming a bit too loud when Hangman challenged you to a game of 9 ball. 

Phoenix spoke up when she heard the challenge. “You really don’t want to do that Hangman.” 

“You afraid I’m gonna beat your sister, Phoenix?” Hangman taunted as he racked the balls. 

“No. I’m afraid she’s gonna kick your ass and we’re gonna have to deal with your pouting for the rest of the week.” Phoenix laughed.  

You took the pool cue from Coyote and walked around the pool table. “Ladies first.” Hangman smirked. You break the balls, send the 2 and 4 balls into pockets and walk around the table to the 1 ball. You quickly sink the ball into the corner pocket. Following the cue ball, you line it up with the 3 and sinks that ball. Sinking the 5 and 6 balls in pockets and starting to line up for your next shot, when you glance over to Phoenix and motion for her to come over. Mumbling softly to her to finish the game for you. “I need to get some fresh air. Kick his ass.” 

You hand Phoenix your pool cue and step outside to the side deck. You lean against the railing, taking deep breaths of the cool salty air. Closing your eyes and hanging your head as you listen to the waves crash against the sand. You weren’t sure how long you stood there but you heard the hollering and felt a presence beside you. You glance up and see that Bob has joined you. He placed a hand on your shoulder, looking concerned. “You okay Y/N?” 

You shivered slightly as he said your name. The way it just rolled off his tongue made you feel like everything in the world was going to be alright. “Yeah, I’m fine. Sometimes I just gotta step away from the loudness of everything.” 

Bob nodded and leaned against the railing with you. “I get that. It can become suffocating and overwhelming.” 

You nod in agreement, shifted towards him. “Yeah. Sometimes I start to get a headache if it’s too loud. But I just needed some fresh air. It was feeling it a bit stuffy.” You pulled out your phone and noticed the time. “Shit. I should head back to my hotel. I didn’t realize the time.” 

You started to head back inside, Bob following behind you and you find Phoenix talking to Fanboy. “Nat, I’m gonna head back to my hotel.” 

Phoenix notices the time and nods. “Okay. How are you getting there? I can drive you back.” 

You shook your head. “No, you stay here with your squad Nats. I’ll just get an Uber.” 

Phoenix’s eyes widen. “Nope. No way. Not this late.” 

Bob quickly spoke up from behind you. “I can drive you back to your hotel.”  

You turned and looked up at him. “You don’t have to do that. I’m really fine with getting an Uber.” 

Phoenix shook her head. “Uber is out of the question. Not this late.” 

“Umm not winning this argument, am I?” You sigh and start to gather your things. 

“Nope, you aren’t.” Phoenix hugs you and mouths a ‘Thank you’ to Bob. 

You hug Phoenix back tightly. “I’ll text you when I get back to my hotel and I’ll let you know what happens after the meeting at Caroline’s. Love you Nats.” 

“Love you too, Y/N.” You make your rounds and bid everyone a good night, following Bob out into the parking lot. He led you to his truck, opening the door for you. You slid in and buckled as he closed the door.  

You didn’t notice as Phoenix and Fanboy watched from the window and gave each other a fist bump. 

“Which hotel are you staying at?” Bob asked as he started his truck. 

You told him the hotel and address and he headed off in the direction of the hotel. It was a short ride there and you hopped out of Bob’s truck as he parked. Turning off his truck, he slid out and walked beside you into the hotel. 

“Thank you, Bob, for the ride. You don’t need to walk me to my door.” You smiled as you waited for the elevator. 

“What kind of man would I be if I didn’t make sure a pretty woman made it to her door safely?” Bob mumbled shyly. 

You both entered the elevator, you pressed the button for the 4th floor and waited for the doors to close. “And Phoenix would probably kick your ass if you didn’t, right?” 

Bob let out a laugh and nodded. “Yeah, she probably would.” 

You exited the elevator to the right and walked a short way to your hotel door. “This is me. Thank you again Bob. You really didn’t have to go thru all this trouble.” 

“No trouble at all Y/N. I was going to be leaving soon anyways.” Bob smiled. “I.. umm.. could I text or call you sometime?” 

You grinned and held out your hand, nodding. “I’d like that. Let me see your phone.” 

Bob unlocked his phone and handed it to you. You added your number to his contacts and sent yourself a text. “Now we have each other's numbers.” You handed him his phone back, leaning up and kissed his cheek. “Good night, Bob.” 

Bob’s cheeks flushed pink, and he stuttered, clearing his throat. “Good night, Y/N. And good luck tomorrow.” 

You tapped your key card against your door, opening it and turned on the lights. You turned and smiled back at him. “Thank you, Bob.”  

Slowly closing the door behind you, making sure to lock it and flopping onto your bed. Bob stayed outside your door until he heard it lock and headed back towards the elevators. You sent Nat a quick text that you were at the hotel before plugging in your phone and getting ready for bed. You drifted off to sleep, thinking about the meeting in the morning and when you were gonna see Bob again. 

Taglist: (always open) @sweetwhispersofchaos

[albatris]

wait how'd you get over your 8 year "writer's block" if you don't mind me asking?

My "writers block" stemmed from several things!

The first was.... in school, I learned to be highly perfectionist and I stopped writing for fun and only thought abt writing for approval and good grades. It really really stressed me out and often left me paralysed with indecision and fear. This perfectionism carried over into my personal writing too. I needed to get back to my roots and remember how to enjoy writing, I needed to retrain my brain to get the happy chemicals from the act of writing something I'm passionate abt rather than from others' response to what I write. How I conquered this..... it was a slow process.... the most important thing for me was to write only when I felt like writing, and stop the moment I wasn't having fun anymore. Sometimes I wouldn't write for weeks. But this allowed me to slowly build up my strength and joy again, and eventually allowed me to relearn how to push myself, this time in a Healthy Manner. There was no shortcut

The second was just depression and other mental health issues. I'm simply just in a much better place now than I used to be. Depression and psychosis come with avolition and anhedonia, n none of that has disappeared, but it certainly has improved for me over the past few years; I also don't live with my parents anymore, I'm on HRT, I'm medicated, I'm becoming a person I like a lot more. Without so much heavy weight to carry I've been able to write more and get excited about writing again! Unfortunately there's no one size fits all answer to how to feel better in your mental health, so I can only tell you to be gentle with yourself and to know that the words will come back! I was in a place for so many years where I hated everything I wrote and thought I'd never find that joy again, but that joy is always waiting for you as long as you don't give up on it c:

A lot of people say the cure for writers block is to Just Write, but that always made things worse for me. Patience and not forcing myself helped me much more and were the only way I could start writing again in a healthy way! It took a long time but I'm a stronger writer now because I took the time and kinda overhauled my whole relationship with writing. Sometimes the most productive thing u can do is rest or invest in other creative hobbies for a while!

Idk if any of that made sense!

[ink-flavored]

Slow-Down Announcement

Hey everyone! Thank you so much for your patience during my break, my move, and through the holidays. It means a lot that you’d all be so generous as to keep paying me while you wait. In general, your continued support is incredibly important to me. And as much as I appreciate it, I will have to ask you for a bit more patience.

Ko-Fi was an experiment I started to see if it was practical for me. I was excited about the response my AUgust 2022 prompts had gotten, and I wanted to see how my audience would respond to access to more of my writing and more of my process. I was also curious to see if I could use Ko-Fi to grow my audience, or supplement my writing career. Building a brand online is difficult, but I couldn’t let an opportunity like this slip by me.

After about 15 months, I can say I’ve had a lot of fun on Ko-Fi. I love Magnet Mondays, I like sharing what happens behind-the-scenes, and giving you all sneak peaks of what’s to come. Like I said, I’m forever grateful you thought my art to be worth paying monthly for in the first place, it’s not something I ever dreamed people would do for me. Unfortunately, posting on Ko-Fi as regularly as I wanted has become impractical for my schedule and mental health.

Keeping up with the rate of posting I promised—weekly, biweekly, and monthly, over my various categories—isn’t sustainable in my current environment. If I had the opportunity to do nothing but write for 8-hours a day, 5-days a week, it would be easy! I would have plenty of time to share my writing with you, continue my personal projects, and maintain a healthy work-life balance. Sadly, my writing schedule is not so generous. My full-time office job cuts into my creative time a lot, and stacking the self-imposed obligations of my Ko-Fi schedule on top of that means that I’m “at work” a lot more than I otherwise would be.

Long story short, I’m getting fatigued trying to keep pace with Ko-Fi updates. I’m going to be slowing down my activity here, and prioritize what I can do without burning myself out. I have a flexible plan that I’ve been developing, so you know where you can find me outside of Ko-Fi if you’d still like to follow my work elsewhere.

Keep Reading below here or on Ko-Fi

First, Magnet Mondays are sticking around, but this time for free. Polls are easier than counting comments, so I’ll be hosting the weekly vote and the poems on my ink-flavored Tumblr account. I really don’t want to give up doing Magnet Mondays, since it was a lot of fun for me (and for you all too, I hope). The first poll will go up this Sunday (January 7th) and the first poem will go up the next Monday (January 15th), so I hope I’ll see you all on Tumblr! I’ll still post the final poems here on Ko-Fi for organization's sake.

Second, one of my goals for 2024 is to be more active on my new Neocities website. The freedom of having my own writing website where I can post whatever I want without the need to be overly professional like a portfolio, and no risk of getting my content reported like on social media, means that I can share a lot more of what I write. Please do check it out, and feel free to sign the guestbook while you’re there!

More generally, I want to migrate some of the Typewriter-tier behind-the-scenes posts to Tumblr and Neocities, so more people can see what goes on under the hood when I write. I don’t have imminent plans to share the exclusive content on Saturdays anywhere else—save for things like AUgust, which are already all free—but I won’t write it off.

Finally, as for the fate of this Ko-Fi account, I’ll be reworking the tiers a bit. Magnet Mondays will be free, so it can’t be a perk, and my plan is to post behind-the-scenes or exclusives sporadically, whenever I feel like I have something to share. I’ll keep the BTS to Wednesdays and the exclusives to Saturdays, but that will be the only consistency in scheduling. Nothing from the Manuscript tier needs to change, since I don’t plan on halting commissions.

Thank you all for being so understanding, and for being so generous this past year and a bit. I’m happy I even had the opportunity to try this out, and it would have been over before it started if I didn’t have people like you.

[hyunjinspark]

JADE 🗣️🗣️🗣️

the screaming anon is back (what I’m now calling myself) & I just have to say…

ch. 18? the angst? the heartbreak? THE PHOTO BOOTH PICTURES??? the argument beside the train? the fact that her professor was a fucking creep? all of it.

the wait for this chapter was so worth it. the way you pieced everything together was incredible. the way that still, with everything going on between them, your writing reminds us that Hyunjin & y/n are the only two people who truly see each other. nothing else matters when it comes to them & I find that so imperative to remember as a reader. & the way that you convey their hurt & how we’re able to physically feel that heaviness & hurt & frustration alongside of them??? but somehow still feeling light whenever a laugh or a smile between the two is mentioned??? wheeew bestie, I feel it all. not to mention how heavy & exhausting it felt to be reading Hyun’s POV. like I felt so bad for him & all he wanted to do was see but also protect y/n. 😭

I had a feeling that it was the professor who was going to make some kind of pass at her, & I was completely devastated to read this, and to feel her devastation & confusion & terror was heartbreaking & unfortunately familiar due to something similar happening to me. but!! I trust you & your writing & the life that you’ve created for Hyun & y/n so I have a feeling that all of this is just the catalyst to come back together somehow. that Hyun is going to show up & be the steadfast anchor that she needs in the middle of this storm. to ease her mind & kiss her doubts & fears away. my god. 😭

& I’m sorry to bring it up again, but the photo booth pictures!!! her copy is ruined & I feel so ridiculous for sobbing when I read that they were crushed in the process but they have to make a comeback, right? like hyun has another copy & we’ll get the full explanation of how he got them?? maybe???

I love this story down to my bones & I will never not be obsessed with it. my love for it grows with each chapter & ch. 18 is just another example as to why. thank you for sharing this with us. for trusting us with your words & your creativity. for providing a story that feels like a friend & a comfort & a cozy place to reside. I hope you’re happy & healthy & are looking forward to the new year. thank you for all that you do. ♡

welcome back !! 🗣️🗣️

ohh this is such a sweet review. they are the core of the story so despite the misunderstandings, ofc they still belong together 🙁 its a relief to hear that it still conveys their bond, amongst everything going on !

im sorry to hear about that ! the professor truly sucks but yes all of that is a catalyst for everything else to come, it was also not meant to be “random” suffering for the sake of angst and i hope it doesnt come off as that 😭 it is an important plot point to the arc of the story and how everything will fall into place.

hyun definitely needs to be that anchor :( im glad you are fixated on the photobooth pictures,,, hopefully there is the other copy…

thank you for this message 🥺 i reread it a lot, and it made me feel happy.

[dapperinsanity]

Last Saturday, I had the wonderful opportunity to see The Nightmare Before Christmas Live in Concert for the movies 30th Anniversary!

It featured Danny Elfman himself and it was amazing to see him perform on stage. He is an inspiration to me and is the reason why I wanted to learn piano. Ken Page was also there and it was amazing to see him as well. The conductor and the orchestra brought the movie to life on stage. It was so cool to witness them playing the entire film’s score. Unfortunately, I was only able to get tickets for Saturday and Catherine O’Hara was not performing that day. But! The woman who filled in for Sally’s role was very talented and she deserved the spotlight. I have some photos below!

Now onto a gush about “The Nightnare Before Christmas” below.

It was surreal to experience this as Nightmare has been my special interest for my entire life. It sounds cheesy but this movie means a lot to me. As a kid, the movie expressed feelings and emotions that I could not put into words. I went most of my life being undiagnosed and neurodivergent. I was the lonely outcasted weird kid who tried his best to fit in and learn how to act like my neurotypical peers. I was a walking character trope. The Nightmare Before Christmas has gotten me through tough and lonely times growing up and ironically enough, I went through a similar identity crisis that the movie touches on. The loneliness and depression Jack experiences in the movie just struck a chord with me. The story, the character, and the music helped me to process many things as a child. It’s a comfort and is also a place I can escape to in my daydreams.

This movie and Burton’s work also played a part in my artwork. The unique style had opened up new and creative pathways for me and helped me to embrace my own weirdness. Although, I don’t give him much credit when it comes to Nightmare, I admit his art style has played a part in my art. I give full credit to the people who worked on the movie as Henry Selick and his team as they deserve it.

Henry Selick is another artist that also inspired me as stopmotion in general, is a part of my special interest. When I was introduced to Rankin Bass movies, that’s where my fascination began. What really honed in my love for stopmotion was The Nightmare Before Christmas. The amount of work that was put in this movie was phenomenal. They were passionate about their work despite the long process and hard work. Since discovering Selick’s work, I’ve been a long time fan. Of course, I’d love to work on my own stopmotion project but that will need to wait for now until I find a stable career lol.

Overall this movie has always been meaningful and important to me in many different ways. Again, it’s cheesy but true. I’m glad to have celebrated its anniversary along with Halloween itself this year.

[mrmojorisinrisin]

I understand, the ending of Interstellar still upsets me too, but it's also fascinating. I don't know if I've made that connection before, why is it you think he told himself not to go and where not to go? Because he knew he'd miss out on his life with his kids or because he didn't find a planet as they hoped they would? Because eventually, his daughter found one. That film is so full of details and logic that I think I need to watch it again. Understanding it fully is a process to me 😅. I was similarly fascinated by Everything, Everywhere All At Once and have to watch it again. I loved how creative and mindblowing the film was — maybe that's something I like in films. And the subtle philosophical part with many layers is what I liked as well.

I agree with you about music biopics. I still have to watch Back To Black. Haha I understand that, doing handicrafts while watching TV is fun and you need to divide your focus 😅

I like knitting socks the most and knitting in rounds in general, but I'm also not really creative when it comes to that. I've never really understood how to crochet but it looks fun as well. Wow those cardigans look difficult to make but very cool! Good luck 🍀

What gave you the idea for the west? It sounds very creative!

Next question: What kinds of holidays do you celebrate and what's your favourite holiday? Why? :)

I'm sorry to say but I'll be gone until Sunday, which is when I'm next going to find the time to write to you. Have a great weekend! 💚

— 🎅

I don't remember Interstellar enough to awnser. Maybe i need to watch it again. The motif for the west simply appeared in my mind. It's sort of an interpretation of Jims words: "I want roses in my garden bower, dig?

Royal babies, rubies must now replace aborted

Strangers in the mud

These mutants, blood-meal

For the plant that’s plowed

They are waiting to take us into the severed garden"

I'm quite practised in embrodering roses by now.

I may switch up the grave of the person, but Kierkegaard's I've visited once and i feel like his works complete the quote.

I like Christmas quite a lot. Celebrating the return of the light is a joyous thing and i like the traditional foods. I get to live with my contry grandparents for a bit. I also enjoy another handicraft (invented by no other than H.C. Andersen). A woven piece of paper, that forms a heart. It's called a 'julehjerte' (Chistmasheart). I've gotten really good at making my own motifs, but I unfortunately lost the paper and templates i need.

Don't be sorry and have a great weekend.

[parksprout]

Sprout Journal 11/4/24

Wow! What a day! I have so much to say about today, but I'll try to keep it brief. So first of all, I hate the time change more than almost anything else in existence. That stuff messes me up so bad!! I woke up at 5am dude, what on earth is there even to do at 5am? I ended up cleaning my room for a lil bit before the sun rose and got dressed for school extra early, so that was nice at least. I somehow managed to rush out of the house early and forget to grab my breakfast, so my banana oatmeal will have to wait another day ToT

On my walk to school I listened to the rest of the first Ghost album and oh my god! I am becoming such a big fan of them so quick, their music is so striking both instrumentally & lyrically. I need to actually read their lore and become a real fan but so far I am LOVING this band. Tobias Forge's accent is also so nice!! That lil bit of Swedish that comes out as he sings adds such a twist to his style. But after my walk to school, I settled into Spanish class for my oral exam - which I think I did pretty dang good on! We had three random prompts that we could've been given, and I unfortunately got the one prompt I didn't have time to practice before the exam, but I aced it anyways! I didn't stutter once, I conjugated all of the verbs in the correct tenses, and my professor let me use the e ending because I'm nonbinary instead of the a (feminine) or o (masculine) ending which made the language work a lot better for me! After Spanish class I had Creative Writing class, which I unfortunately am behind on. I didn't read the chapters in the novel we're supposed to be reading for the rest of the semester. We actually had a different professor today and will have a different one for the next three weeks! Our main professor had his baby last week. He seems like such a good father, apparently he's taking full time care of the baby while his wife rests ToT how adorable??? If I ever have a kid I wanna be like that, taking care of my partner while they recover. Anyways our new professor introduced herself in such a funny way. I could hear the distinct clop of her faux alligator skin platform shoes echoing down the hallway from a half mile away, and she burst into the classroom late with a flourish then SLAMMED the door behind herself. She's so quirky and chic. She was wearing this seashell patterned dress shirt, fancy ass corduroy pants that I really am jealous of, and even more jewelry than I wear each day! She led us through a really fun discussion in class.

After that, my Anthropology professor called off so I had an almost four hour period of downtime during which I told myself that I was gonna do a bunch of reading, but instead I ended up just posting to tumblr and texting my [REDACTED]. We talked so much this morning and it was so fun ToT I know I shouldn't be ridiculous and hope too much about things so soon, but at the very least we're communicating a lot better than we have in months regardless of what we are. I do keep finding myself sending them hearts, or messing up and saying a pet name. I called them babe earlier out of reflex and deleted the message super fast, I don't know if they even saw it? I think that if we do become a couple again I'm gonna find myself laughing over how awkward I've been while trying to keep my natural inclination towards affection repressed. Either way, our conversations were super fun today, but I started getting both too feelys and wanting to say things I shouldn't like the big four letter word, and also I started getting a bruuuttaalll headache. I had to buy myself a water and some acetaminophen and put my phone down for a while.

Archaeology class was after that, and it was such an interesting lecture! We had a guest lecturer today and she discussed the actual process of applying for, obtaining, and working field jobs specifically within Cultural Resource Management. So, CRM is this pseudo-governmental job in archaeology that typically requires you work with both state governments and construction agencies. Basically, anytime there's a state or federally funded construction project it's legally required that the construction company and state pay for archaeologists to examine the site to make sure that no artifacts/cultural materials are being damaged. It's the bulk of all field work conducted by archaeologists today and probably what I'm gonna end up doing as my career!

Gosh this is turning out to be a lot. After that I went to the gym and worked my ASS off. I wrote down what I did so here it is :3

15 minutes (two miles) on the elliptical as a warmup

3 sets of 10 shoulder press reps at 85 lbs

1 set of 10 shoulder press reps at 110 lbs

3 sets of 10 leg raise machine reps at 140 lbs

1 set of 15 leg raise machine reps at 200 lbs (I MAXED OUT THE MACHINE MY LEGS ARE SO STRONG OUGH)

3 sets of 10 incline bench machine reps at 85 lbs

1 set of 10 incline bench machine reps at 110 lbs (this one I barely managed omg)

15 minutes (two more miles) on the elliptical to finish off strong!

I was sweating so much by the end omg. I ate a protein bar and had probably 1.5 liters of water while at the gym aklsdjfhaksdjf but I'm loving the effect that working out has on my mentality for the rest of the night after I get home. Also, the people are starting to recognize me there and someone even cheered me on today!

This is a lot. Besides that, I called my sister and got some super solid relationship/self care advice, got stuff to make the bnuuy their christmas presents in the mail, and played a bunch of bass! I also recorded myself singing along to two songs I really heavily fw and sent it to the Bnuuy as well, and got myself some food at my favorite local restaurant for the first time in a while!

It was a very good day <3 thank you for listening tumblr, I love you! Have a good night everyone