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stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale · 5 years ago

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An Explanation of Why Louis and Violet are Both Terrific Love Interests [1/5]

+Why both romantic routes are not only amazing but better than other games I’ve personally played in the past.

+Why some people are idiots and get off on picking stupid fights.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

Grab a beverage and sit down, I’m about to weave you a tale.

A long time ago, I made an Instagram account. I did this so that I could have another place to intake TWDG content. I got to see lots of artwork and watch fun little videos and edits and it was all great.

For about an hour before everything went downhill far too quickly. You see, I rarely go on that Instagram account anymore because no matter what tag I look under to search for content, a good 60% of it is all the same: hateful.

Hateful towards Violet, hateful towards Louis, hateful towards each other. I can’t tell you how many posts I’ve scrolled past with the title “TELLTALE AND SKYBOUND HATE LOUIS AND HERE’S WHY” or “VIOLET IS THE WORST AND HERE’S WHY” or “WHY VIOLENTINE IS CANON AND CLOUIS IS NOT” or any other nonsense along those lines.

After that, I quit going on Instagram.

Until one day, I thought to myself, “Well, maybe now that the game is over, those dingdongs have moved on and I can look at the twdg tag in peace!”

And to be fair, it wasn’t as bad, but it’s still actively being made. Along with other questionable content that I think has taken hours off of my life just by witnessing it but we’re not going to dive down that rabbit hole right now.

Anyway, after glancing over another “SKYBOUND HATES LOUIS” post, I couldn’t help but think, “Y’know, either y’all don’t realize how lucky we were to have gotten a bisexual lead with not only one great romantic option but two amazing romantic options, or y’all are just a bunch of idiots who get off on fighting. Maybe even both. I mean, sure, they’re not equal in every single way possible and there are a lot of things that I wanted, but it’s a helluva lot better than what we’ve been given in the past with other games.”

The thoughts kept building up as I recalled previous games that had optional romances that left me underwhelmed or downright disappointed. Neither Louis nor Violet have perfect romance routes, each with things that we wish we had more of, but we’re lucky to have gotten what we did, and because I haven’t written a post like this in a long time, allow me to break it down for you.

Keep in mind that this is just my opinion and how I see things. I’m sure there’ll be a point where you say “Well, CJ, I beg to differ on this particular topic and/or idea-” and that’s fine.

Hell, maybe you have a game with a disappointing romance that I didn’t list here because I’ve yet to play it. That’s great, feel free to share! This post is for fun but also because I need to vent some frustrations towards a fight that is 100% unnecessary but continues regardless.

Beware of spoilers for the following games:

Life is Strange Persona 4 TWDG: A New Frontier King’s Quest [2015] Catherine

[both Louis and Violet are great!]

all y’all on instagram are just idiots

Now, in case you couldn’t tell from my blog, I love Louis. When it comes to my personal canon of TWDG, clouis is my endgame. Louis is my favorite non-playable character of the entire series, if not my absolute favorite. I love him.

You know who else I love? Violet. She’s great. I found myself relating a lot to her character and I wanted to see her make it to the end okay. I was pissed when she was pissed at me, but in the end, I was more pissed about her treatment regarding her blinding and how easily she and Clementine made up.

But you know what I really, truly love? A great bisexual protagonist: Clementine.

Clementine’s the lucky one here in that she has the choice between sweet, charming, loyal Louis and witty, strong yet sensitive Violet. This is the definition of “bi panic” because really

I do want to add that I haven’t played Violet’s romance route, but I don’t need to to know that it’s great. There are a thousand and one blogs who can explain her romance with Clementine 100% better than I can, but I will try my best within this section and my conclusion since I’m mostly talking about them together.

Now, why is it great that Clementine is a bisexual protagonist? Well, there’s obviously the representation which was more than welcome in this case, regardless of what some idiots will say.

Not only that, but it allows the player to romance a boy or a girl, which again, is obvious but I have some points about this that I’ll bring up when I talk about other games, like Life is Strange and Persona 4, so put a little pin in that for later.

Both Louis and Violet are presented as loving partners for Clementine, and they’re both people who Clementine cares about. Based on your choices and how you play her, you can be as affectionate with them as possible and help them better themselves over the course of the game.

Louis and Violet have different but interesting backstories, they have different ways of communicating their feelings, they both deal with their own struggles [internal and external] and open up to Clementine in different ways.

Yes, there was plenty to be desired within the routes. We’ve talked about that before so I won’t go into great detail about it, but in conclusion: Louis and Violet are great.

So why do people argue about it?

My scientific conclusion states that they’re idiots who get off on picking fights over the internet.

And that they don’t know how good they got it because we could’ve gotten so, SO much worse.

At this point, I will be comparing the Louis/Violet romance to romances found in other games I’ve played, starting with a game that I liked very much, but was ultimately disappointed with, well.... everything.

[life is strange and imbalance]

every choice matters except not really until we hit episode 5: bae vs bay

Life is Strange is an episodic game that released in 2015. It follows Max Caulfied, a young, aspiring photographer attending Blackwell Academy who learns that she can rewind time after witnessing a girl being shot in the bathrooms.

I was pretty into this when it first came out. I played each episode as it came out, I read stuff on Tumblr and watched every theory video on youtube I could find. It had a likable and relatable protagonist, a pretty cool missing person mystery, cringy dialogue, and cool rewind powers.

Let’s talk about Max, our playable protagonist.

She’s shy, awkward, nosy, and she wants to be a photographer but lacks confidence when it comes to putting herself out there despite having the talent. She goes through a lot of grief and betrayal through the game, but ultimately learns more about herself and how her choices affect everything around her.

She’s also bisexual, and like Clementine, she can romance a girl or a boy.

Love Interest #1: Chloe Price

Chloe is the deuteragonist [secondary main character] of Life is Strange, and Max’s old childhood friend. She’s also the girl who gets shot in the bathroom, and the girl whose [girl]friend, Rachel Amber, is missing.

Over the course of the story, Max and Chloe reconnect and grow closer as they try and find Rachel while also trying to figure out Max’s powers. We spend most of our time with Chloe, going to diner’s and junkyards and what have you.

We learn a lot about Chloe’s home life: Her father died in a car accident, her mom owns a diner and remarried an asshole who smacks Chloe around when she smokes weed in her bedroom. We see Chloe as her most vulnerable, we save her life numerous times because she just won’t stop getting herself killed.

Hell, we do this to the point where it begins to physically hurt Max and makes her bleed. We do this because Max claims that Chloe is the most important person to her.

The most important person in Max’s life.

Now, spoilers for the ending, but it turns out that the storm that’s come to destroy Arcadia Bay is all because of Chloe. So, the final choice Max has to make is to either go back and let Chloe die in the bathroom or let the storm destroy a town and kill nearly everyone there.

Either you sacrifice an entire town of people or you sacrifice Chloe.

Bay vs Bae, as the kids dubbed it.

Romancing Chloe isn’t exactly full of fluffy smooches, though. You’d think it would, but considering that the girl we’re looking for is Chloe’s girlfriend who Chloe loved very much, it’s mostly Max saying how much she cares about Chloe and then Chloe turning around like “Boy, I wish Rachel was here...”

Then we find out Rachel’s fucking dead and that’s a real romance killer if I’ve ever seen one.

Hell, the only time you get a real smooch from her [that we see] is if you sacrifice her! If you sacrifice the town, the game’s like “Really? Okay....” and you watch Max and Chloe drive through a wrecked town and into the sunset together.

There’s a lot of different factors to it that you don’t get unless you’ve played it, but for me, it was disappointing. I didn’t even romance Chloe the first time because I didn’t even really like her, but when I did romance her, I felt cheated!

I only get to be happy with my girlfriend if I can live with the blood of an entire town on my hands?? And odds are, fate’s gonna keep trying to kill her, so I also have to hurt myself and numerous timelines to keep her alive until I eventually explode????

Man, I don’t know if I want to commit to that, y’know? Thankfully, there’s another romance option I can look at, right?

....Right?

Continued in Part 2

#twdg louis #louis twdg #twdg violet #violet twdg #twdg clouis #clouis #twdg violentine #violentine #twdg clementine #clementine twdg

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textbooksanddaydreams · 6 years ago

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University Essentials - Class Edition

Hey everyone! I know when I graduated high school, I was frantically looking at every possible list I could find for what I should bring with me to uni. I’m going to break this into two or three parts, but the most important is of course what you need to bring to class!

DISCLAIMER: obviously this varies by person. You may not need, or even want everything on this list, but it’s what I’ve found that I either like to keep on me, or end up wishing I had on me in class or while I’m on campus (I’ve always lived off campus)

So without further ado, here is a complete list of everything I consider essential!

Laptop (and charger) - You may not like using your laptop for notes, and that’s okay! Some profs won’t let you use your laptop in their class, but even if that’s the case, it’s a perfect way to kill time between classes, or even get to work on that pesky essay when you have a few minutes. This can be a distraction though, so use it wisely!

One or two pens or pencils you REALLY like - these make your note-taking experience so much more enjoyable, trust me

A few shitty pens and pencils - for the classmates who will inevitably forget to bring their own, and then steal yours. Don’t give them your good writing supplies.

Highlighters - I don’t use these all the time in class, but they’re good to have when you need them. I like mildliners, but whatever you have a preference for is good!

Mini Stapler - You won’t use it often, but when you print out an essay last minute, it’s really nice to not have to worry about finding a stapler

Sticky notes - These are great for writing any questions you have down, as well as any concepts you need to review more later, without messing up your note taking system.

At least one folder - For the love of everything, do NOT just shove papers into your bag. You won’t be able to easily find them later, they WILL get crumpled and torn, and it’s all around just not a fun time.

A water bottle - it’s so important to stay hydrated, and if you’re running to the water fountain every hour, you end up missing a lot of material.

A light snack - preferably something that doesn’t make noise. It’s almost impossible to concentrate when you’re hungry, so nip the problem in the bud by keeping a snack with you. I almost always have one or two Clif bars in my backpack because they’re easy to eat, filling, and tasty!

A USB - this will come in handy more times than you know, and it’s good to keep an extra copy of your assignments on there.

A notebook - seemingly a given, but even if you tend to take notes on the computer, it’s always good to have a notebook in case you can’t use your laptop for some reason.

A painkiller of some sort - headaches always strike at the worst times, so be prepared with something to relieve it!

An eraser or correction tape - Another given, it’s important to always have this with you when you’re taking notes!

A pad or tampon - even if you don’t need or use them yourself, at some point, you’re going to have a friend who does need one, and they’ll be so grateful

Lipbalm - The dry air in classrooms can really dry out your lips! Stay on top of it with some lip balm.

Paperclips - some professors won’t staple their papers. The mini stapler is ideal, but in a pinch, paper clips will do the job. Also good for marking places in your textbook that you’ll need to come back to.

Planner - to keep track of your commitments and assignments of course! If your prof changes the due date of an assignment or if your friend wants to hang out later in the week, it’s important to be able to note that down quickly!

Phone charger - always an essential when you’re away from home, this makes sure that you’re never without your most important tech!

Loose paper - for when your prof wants you to quickly do something and hand it in, or if a classmate needs paper. Ripping paper out of your notebook can hurt, so making sure that you have loose leaf paper prevents that!

Tissues - Even if you aren’t sick, it’s always nice to have on you! You never know when you’ll get the sniffles, or even a nose bleed.

Earbuds - for the breaks between classes when you need to listen to music or a video on the topic

Any materials provided or requested by your professor - whether that’s a textbook, the syllabus, or even a handout emailed to you last minute, it’s important to have!

Tape - tape can fix almost anything, including wardrobe malfunctions in a pinch

Some change - you never know when you’re going to want to grab a snack or drink from a vending machine or the campus store!

Your student ID - it’s so crucial to keep this with you. Some schools require them for exams, and it proves that you’re a student there if questioned by administration for whatever reason!

Gum or mints - these prevent you from being distracted by what you last ate, and can help you concentrate!

A jacket - Classrooms can be chilly, even when it’s warm outside

So there you have it! My ultimate list of essentials for the classroom!

#studyblr #studyspo #university #college #collegetips #mine #student #studying #study #freshman #tips

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secondscratch17 · 5 years ago

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weird asks that say a lot

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans? All of them. I drink tea in coffee mugs and teacups. I love drinking wine. I like that I can recycle soda cans

2. chocolate bars or lollipops? chocolate

3. bubblegum or cotton candy? bubblegum if the flavor lasts long

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you? the stereotypical quiet, obedient, smart, goody-two-shoes kid

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups? somehow I like the aesthetic from soda bottles

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear? hONESTLY I can dO ALL OF THE ABOVE in the span of days. Went to work one day wearing beach-y clothes for spirit day. Returned to pick up a friend to go see a metal concert in VERY metal concert attire. I own short, sweet summery floral dresses and gothic dresses, too

7. earbuds or headphones? Earbuds, they allow me to be more mobile

8. movies or tv shows? movies

9. favorite smell in the summer? Fresh cut grass. The smell of the ocean. Churros at the fair

10. game you were best at in p.e.? Soccer, obvs. Somehow would always last until the end of the game in dodgeball tho because I was small and no one could hit me

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day? Cereal

12. name of your favorite playlist? Don’t have one.

13. lanyard or key ring? Key ring

14. favorite non-chocolate candy? Smarties!

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment? I remember re-reading Holes over and over just to make my book reports easier since I knew the boo so well. The Kite Runner was phenomenal and unforgettable

16. most comfortable position to sit in? idk?? I really can’t sit still in one position for too long

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes? Currently my hiking/outdoorsy shoes. Also my black Nikes that I play pickup in and wear to the gym

18. ideal weather? Sunny and 65. Maybe one or two clouds. The tiniest of faint breezes to cool me down.

19. sleeping position? Any I can get into and fall asleep in quickly

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)? Laptop. I can edit easier.

21. obsession from childhood? Probably any cheesy show on Animal Planet. The Most Extreme, Meerkat Manor, Big Cat Diary, etc

22. role model? I have a lot of different ones. Role models for athletics, role models for career and ambition choices, artistic role models...can’t pick just one

23. strange habits? Spelling words with the tips of my fingers

24. favorite crystal? Aquamarine

25. first song you remember hearing? how in the FUCK am I supposed to remember that. I do remember my parents playing The Beatles for me when I was a toddler

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather? Soccer! (futbol)

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather? Sledding, making hot chocolate, or playing indoor soccer haha

28. five songs to describe you? Who I am Hates Who I’ve Been by Relient K, Proud by the Icarus Account, Land of the Dead by Voltaire, Always Leaving by Mayday Parade, Wavin’ Flag by K’naan

29. best way to bond with you? Listening to my favorite music with me or watching the US Women’s national soccer team with me

30. places that you find sacred? Belfast, Maine. Gold Camp Road. Newport Beach

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names? Tight jeans with holes in them, fishnets, and a crop top

32. top five favorite vines? Vines still exist?

33. most used phrase in your phone? “tbh”

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head? O O O O REILLYYYYYY’S autoparts

35. average time you fall asleep? around 9

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing? I don’t remember

37. suitcase or duffel bag? suitcase

38. lemonade or tea? Is it warm outside? Lemonade. Is it cold outside? tea

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie? PIE!

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school? Zombie hunting or my professor cutting lab a half an hour short to go look at some Cedar waxwings

41. last person you texted? I think it was Robert

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets? Pants pockets

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket? Jean jacket

44. favorite scent for soap? Anything fruity

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero? Fantasy. It depends on how good the sci-fi movie is

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in? as little as possible lmao

47. favorite type of cheese? Parmesan

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be? A raspberry

49. what saying or quote do you live by? A great amount of good is always evened out by a great amount of bad

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have? Honestly Daniel knew how to make me laugh better than anyone. There are a couple of memories with him that I don’t remember entirely but I know that I ended up cry-laughing so hard that my head hurt. There was a time during my orientation camping trip when a bunch of us were playing ultimate Frisbee, and Jesse went to catch the frisbee in the most perfectly lateral horizontal position and the expression of focus just frozen on his face had me laughing so hard that I couldn’t see

51. current stresses? Sam. Jobs that I can apply for starting in May of 2020. Sam. STUDENT LOANS. Bills. Car payments. Wondering how fucked up my car has gotten since I’ve lived here on this ranch. Sam.

52. favorite font? Anything that looks fancy and sarcastic

53. what is the current state of your hands? Need to be washed.

54. what did you learn from your first job? The world is cruel and bad things happen without warning

55. favorite fairy tale? Uh....the Pied Piper?

56. favorite tradition? when my family visits for Christmas, eating lots of traditional Chinese food with them

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome? Heartbreak. Staggering rejection from the field I majored in. Probably a lot of body image struggles in there as well

58. four talents you’re proud of having? Writing, futbol, adaptability, flexibility. I think the last two are just traits but I don’t have a lot of talents I can invest in

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be? Let’s make like a baby and head out

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be? No idea

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.? Though we are far apart, our spirits share the same earth and the same sky

62. seven characters you relate to? Bilbo Baggins from The Hobbit, Data from The Goonies, Luna Lovegood from Harry Potter, Eliza Thornberry from The Wild Thornberries, Raven from Teen Titans, Isaac from Teen Wolf

63. five songs that would play in your club? ANYTHING by Within Temptation. I wouldn’t be a good club owner. The catchy and pump-up songs from Hamilton.

64. favorite website from your childhood? Wasn’t allowed much computer time. I was allowed to visit educational sites and occasionally the Disney site

65. any permanent scars? some self-harm scars. Probably the one on my right leg that I got from CO parks and wildlife. I stepped on a barbed wire fence that had been plastered to the ground, but the metal sprang up when I stepped on it and ripped through my skin

66. favorite flower(s)? Plumerias

67. good luck charms? I’m not sure if I have any.

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried? earthworm flavor from Bertie Bott’s every flavor beans

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned? uh...Something about not being able to spray silly string on Halloween in Hollywood

70. left or right handed? Right handed

71. least favorite pattern? wtf

72. worst subject? anything math related, I really struggled in GIS.

73. favorite weird flavor combo? I...have no idea

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen? 2. I’m a baby

75. when did you lose your first tooth? I was 6

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)? chips and fries

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill? a succulent

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store? sushi from a grocery store, the quality can surprise you

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo? Both are terrible

80. earth tones or jewel tones? Jewel tones

81. fireflies or lightning bugs? I hate bugs

82. pc or console? PC

83. writing or drawing? Writing, I’m terrible at drawing

84. podcasts or talk radio? Not into either

84. barbie or polly pocket? I had both

85. fairy tales or mythology? God!!!! Like hearing about both but mythology I guess

86. cookies or cupcakes? Cookies

87. your greatest fear? Being forgotten. I also have a terrible, horrible fear of drowning

88. your greatest wish? In the times I’ve struggled I often find myself wishing for peace. Not only for myself, but for others to easily feel peace with everyone else

89. who would you put before everyone else? Sierra

90. luckiest mistake? Mistake? There’s been lucky accidents but I don’t think any of my mistakes have been lucky

91. boxes or bags? It depends on what I’m packing and where I’m going

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights? Sunlight

93. nicknames? T, Tear, Tear-tear, T-Dog, Miss T..a few of my recent favorites from soccer: Ronaldinha and Thierry Chun

94. favorite season? Fall! Shit, especially in New England

95. favorite app on your phone? I don’t know

96. desktop background? A picture of a simple dock leading out to sea

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized? My parents’ and brother’s

98. favorite historical era? Victorian era, for sure

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spale-vosver · 6 years ago

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A Year In Review: 2018 Edition

I don’t normally make my own posts here, nor are they ever personal (I say as though I make posts at all), but since the year is very close to being over—in fact, as I’m writing this it’s 11:02 PM on December 31st—I wanted to look back at where I’ve been and where I still have to go; review the year, basically.

2018 was one hell of a bumpy year for me, though bumpy isn’t inherently bad. I met some amazing friends (you’ll all be mentioned later on) and at the same time lost and almost lost some amazing ones, whether it was to them moving away or my own mistakes. I got involved in so many new things I’d never done before: I got fully involved in theatre, I got kind of maybe in shape, I started caring about my health, I met so many new people both irl and online, I asked my (now ex but still best friend) girlfriend out for the first time it was honestly so new to me and coming out of my shell was an experience I needed.

As the year progressed and school wrapped up, though, I started to wane a bit. Anyone who knows me knows that summer wasn’t great mental health, especially since I was cooped up inside all day doing absolutely nothing but watching YouTube and playing way too much Crusader Kings, and everyone I interacted with felt the effects. I wasn’t nearly as accountable for my own health as I should have been, and I ended up hurting the same amazing people I’d met that year. Truth be told, I’ve still not fully recovered from those mistakes, and though I know no one holds it against me, they’re still some of my biggest regrets. Even now I’m still making them, but each time I make one, it’s less severe than the last time, and each time progressively less and less bad, so I’m improving, though not as fast as I want to, and unfortunately that speed won’t be achieved until I finally start CBT.

Speaking of that, this year wasn’t totally awful on the mental health front, though, considering I both went to a gender therapist to speak about advancements in my transition and was properly diagnosed with anxiety and depression and probably autism, and I can finally start treatment for them. When I do, my own efforts won’t be in vain, and I’ll hopefully have a leg up on whatever treatment I start. I just hope it comes soon, though, because seasonal depression can actually kiss my ass and no, Pennsylvania, 11 days is NOT a suitable amount of time for a break.

Anyways, now on to the real gushy stuff where I @ my friends and acquaintances and tell them how much I lurvvvv them. So, starting off with who I met first:

@thefunrepository/Camille/pash: When you let me join your discord server, I met some of the best people and best friends I’ve ever had, and for that, I’m eternally grateful. Even though you’ve now left that server, when you were there, you tolerated so much of my incessant rambling and @ing and my overall teenage boy-i-ness, but you never made me feel excluded, and I loved every second of it. Thank you so much for even tolerating me, because when I joined and was even just talking to you, that was what I needed most. (P.S.: here’s a New Years resolution for you: FINISH A WIP thanks bye I love you)

@xinnic: my fellow Irish Catholic fam, you’ve been nothing but supportive of me and my work from day one, and I can’t count how many nights over the pretty-shitty summer I spent cooling down by rambling to you about my gay trash kids and my gay trash WIP. Likewise, I’ve never gotten tired of your ramblings about your gay trash kids and your gay trash WIP, and your rambles have singlehandedly made me weak for Roísín in 1000 different ways. You’ve always been there when I needed to talk or reference something, and when you bring your meme game, it’s top tier. I remember almost crying when you started the binder squad, and though it’s no longer around, I still appreciate it. Thank you so much for caring and just being you.

@lilquill: man, oh man do we have a weird relationship. I honestly kind of thought you were annoying at first and no that’s not unique to you but I also warmed up to you really quickly. Your energy levels are unmatched and no matter how tired I am, your ability to somehow shout over text fixes that. You’ve spearheaded so many weird and memorable moments for the hell server, including the readings that led us to our voice reveals, to the ACOTRASH find and replace kerfuffle, and so many other things. Besides that, you’ve been a great friend, always pushing me to do better and be better and calling me out when necessary; I may not show it the best, but I appreciate all of it, and I probably wouldn’t be who I am right now without you. You’re also one of the bravest and most outspoken people I know, with the whole whiteblr deal only proving how willing you are to speak out against bullshit and bigotry. Thank you so much for your undying support of me and of everyone else, and I only hope to be as badass as you someday.

@gingerly-writing: ok please don’t be upset that yours is slightly shorter than everyone else’s but I wasn’t around you as much SO. You’re an insanely talented writer and memeing at you as well as sharing my writing has been so fun. I annoy you so much but you still manage to tolerate me and honestly that’s insanely commendable. I want to see you succeed in all of your projects this year and the next and the next and so on, as well as continue giving amazing advice; when you told me I was really good at characterisation, it was the first time I’d ever gotten proper writing advice, and I’ll cherish it always. Thank you for being a pal and dealing with mine (and someone else’s who we’ll mention later) shenanigans.

@olympusrox123: Sian, you fucking Aussie meme, I love you so much and you won’t get this until later because you’re on a goddamn plane but oh well. You’re insanely funny and smart, and you’ve made me laugh so many times I can’t keep count. When you took part in the name change shenanigans on discord, that was when I knew you were A Top Tier Meme and someone I could send only my freshest. Apart from that, you’re so sweet and have always been interested in what I have to say; plus, I love screaming at you about whatever and whenever and that time we read the Sherlock fic? Godly. Anyways, I just want to say that I heckin love you and that I hope you stay just as you are. Thank you for being you.

@ardentlythieving: oh man oh man oh man my ultimate meme buddy. My compadre. Second member of the three Memesketeers. The shit we’ve gotten up to together is amazing and I’ve loved every second of it. From the day we met we’ve been basically inseparable members, despite your penchant for backstabbing and betraying my meme plans due to your chaotic neutral nature, and every memey thing we’ve done together and every in joke we’ve made has been one of the most memorable meme moments of my life. You’ve always been there when I wanted or needed to just let loose my chaotic energy, and the fact that you just sort of adopted me into both your meme house and your internet family in general has made me so happy. I’ve loved playing SWTOR with you and talking about Thrawn with you and sending you the worst shit I can find, and I wouldn’t trade a second of it. Thank you for being your memey-ass self, and if I don’t get even better memes this year I’m flying to your hell-sheep-rock-land to fight you.

@thornheartcat: we’re waaaaay too fucking similar for our own good. To our taste in video games and anime (max weebage) to our experiences with ASD, I’ve found so many ways to relate to you, which has made talking to you so fun. And that’s another thing: you’re older than me by a lot, but you’ve never treated me any differently, which has meant so much to me. You’ve always put me on equal ground with you and the rest of your friends, and have tolerated my fuckery since day 1, even if you do have some questionable choices in media you enjoy. The long and short of it is, you’re hella rad and hella nerdy, and I love nerding out with you. Thank you for seeing past my age and treating me just like anyone else.

@catcatamelia: chaotic Aussie lesbian says what??? Amelia you’re fucking great and so talented and so creative, and you’re so much fun to be around. I love playing shitty and good video games with you, as well as just talking and memeing back and forth and watching you draw; you’re so amazingly multitalented and interesting that I never get bored around you. I wish that we could hang out via the interwebs more, but bullshit scheduling is bullshit scheduling and whatcha gonna do. You’ve also always been there to comfort me because, like so many of my amazing friends, we share so many issues and commonalities that you always know just what to say. Thank you for never being afraid to open up and just be your wild self. Please never change.

@sea-reader: I left you for last because I have the most to say to you. Our relationship has been up and down in the almost one year we’ve known each other, and it’s mostly due to me. Since we started talking on discord, I’ve always loved listening to you talk about whatever; you always bring your own energy and passion to it, and even if it’s about stuff I don’t know a whole ton about, I’m never bored listening to you talk about it. You’re funny, and smart, and talented, and I’m so glad to have met you in the first place. You were a major factor in helping me out of my shell; there wasn’t a day that went by in the first half of this year where I didn’t mention you in some capacity to someone I knew because you’d said something hilarious or really smart or had brought some new idea I’d never thought of to the table or just done something. Was it the most healthy thing in the world? No, and looking back on it we started getting unhealthy even before The Thing That I’m Not Going To Mention In Public, but we’re continuing to grow and improve even to this day, and for that I’m forever thankful. You could have easily shut me out after that incident, but you didn’t; you gave me a second chance that I’ve rarely ever gotten, and I’m so, so glad. I know we likely won’t ever be as close as we once were, nor will we be able to talk like we once did, but that’s okay, because it doesn’t have to be perfect. It just has to be us, and it has to be healthy, and that’s enough for me. I love you more than I can say, just like everyone else, and I can only hope 2019 brings the best for the both of us. Thank you for being a friend, Lori, because our relationship, the good and the bad, was part of what I needed and got from all of the people I interacted with and met this year. Happy New Year, you dork.

If I missed anyone, please forgive me; it’s now 7 minutes to 2019, and I’m rushing. Tl;dr; Happy New Years, everyone. Be a little better, because you can be, even if you don’t think so.

-Geoff.

#new years 2019 #new year 2019 #new year reflection #reflection #personal tag #personal #my own posts

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violetemerald · 7 years ago

Video

youtube

Multi-Couples/Multi-Friendships - "Shout" (The Joy & Pain of My Queerplatonic Relationship) - WYA

Song is called “Shout” and is by Ross Copperman. This video was a NIGHTMARE to edit and render because idk, my software just KEPT crashing, GOSH it was trying to kill me I swear.

This was made for season 2, round 2 of GlowingAprilSky's "Who You Are" contest, this time themed around "The Relationship". (Round 1, “Breaking Point” I entered with a fanvideo tribute to embracing my asexuality & sex-aversion: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JqRr60lP444 ) The idea for this round was to show a person who helped really change who we are going forward in our life, basically. We participants in the contest were supposed to focus on capturing how they affected us, and how they shaped who we are.

YouTube descriptions have character limits but tumblr doesn’t so look under the “~~~~~” for more stuff than what I could fit in my YouTube description! I transcribed the voiceovers down there too.

Urban Dictionary begins defining Queerplatonic as "a relationship which is more intense and intimate than is considered common or normal for a 'friendship', but doesn't fit the traditional sexual-romantic couple model."

Every Queerplatonic Relationship (QPR) or set of Queerplatonic Partners (QPP) is different, chooses the terminology for different reasons, and that's really the beauty of it. This is a word to describe everything that was forgotten in mainstream culture's narrow boxes of "just friends" vs. "more than friends because of the romantic(&usually sexual too) component". Some sex-averse asexual people are in celibate romantic relationships. But others are in relationships that are "more complicated".

Robert* and I met at an asexual meetup group. I was 25, he was 26. He leaned gay and had no attraction towards women (I'm female) but we bonded quickly over having a lot in common, and became close friends. I wasn't sure if I was aromantic or panromantic or what, but I knew in the back of my mind I'd like a queerplatonic partner one day. We had a lot of fun, went to concerts together, played board games, watched TV/films, talked about families and pasts including the deep personal stuff, the traumas. He shared about his mental health with me.

(*name has been changed)

At some point along the way, we realized we wanted similar futures. We both had wanted, since long before we met each other, to become foster parents and later adoptive parents. We were both atheists & while I'd planned to wait to start looking for a qpp to be a co-parent for my future children until after I was no longer unemployed, maybe after I'd figured out where I'd live in the country and stuff, it just happened sooner than I was ready. It was too perfect, too good to pass up, and after we'd known each other for about 7 months we stopped just being super close friends. We became queerplatonic partners. We didn't do anything really different, but we had this shared plan to one day be committed life partners and to for now be logical "plus ones" to events where people might bring significant others, such as his siblings' weddings. We were "together".

He broke up with me the 1st time after we'd been QPPs for 4 months. I was really crushed but happy we were at least still friends. It took some time to get back into a groove. We weren't as close. He ended it because he wasn't sure anymore he wanted that future and because he'd been hoping to feel more romantic things for me with time but instead his feelings had remained platonic. He was super important to me, & he'd told me before we broke up that he was thinking of signing up to deploy (as a U.S. civilian contractor) to Afghanistan.

He ultimately did leave to go on the 6 month deployment about 2 weeks into me finally having a full time job, long after we'd broken up. But we started texting more, while he was over there. (Facebook messaging, actually.) Our friendship's closeness was rekindled. We each had lots of down time during workdays, and we got back together around 1 month into his deployment.

We talked about everything for the 5 months we were in a long distance relationship, shared our lives with each other, and were "together". I told him I looked forward to slow dancing with him one day, and ice skating, etc... we rekindled our plans to become non-biological parents....

Skipping over some details he broke up with me only days after we first saw each other in person for the first time in 6 months. He texted, said he "Couldn't do this anymore", and when I tried to ask why he said he got a call but we'd talk more the next day.

I had texted a little more after that, asking if our near future plans to do a suicide prevention walk together etc were definitely off (because last time we still did some things together as friends, I thought maybe it wouldn't be outside the realm of possibility).

He never texted back, never contacted me again. I feel kinda like I was ghosted, abandoned. He never explained why we suddenly after 2 years were just... nothing. This was 6 months ago.

This vid should hopefully capture a lot of that (& more?). (Btw: I purposely didn't show ANY kissing.)

~~~~~

Some of the details I skipped over were that while I was with him, I realized how “demisensual” I am, not demisexual, I’m 100% asexual, but rather the “Sensual” suffix - I do not crave touch at all in my relationships unless I have a strong emotional bond, but I looked forward to reuniting and hugging him for months, and I did and it was a glorious hug when he was back home.

I also started fantasizing about maybe marrying him, or thinking about legality of adopting together if we weren’t married and how that probably would be impractical... and how we would or wouldn’t queer the wedding, and do it secularly without religion because that’s important to us, and how I probably wouldn’t want to wear white and stuff... but I was scared to voice these fantasies too early and scare him away.

Also we gave each other gifts by mail even during those 5 months when we were long-distance, and over the course of our relationship before that too. That was a pretty good indicator of how close we’d gotten, he bought be an iPod, gave me a necklace I liked to wear, I picked out gifts for him really carefully for Christmas too, etc.

But how did this relationship change who I am or the course of my life/my future? I mean, because of Robert I realized it’s possible for me to fall in love, and it made my dream of finding a co-parent despite my orientation seem tangible, it gave me hope and optimism for a time, showed me how much joy I was capable. For a while there I had started basically thinking of him as my fiance, I felt that committed to him.

I could tell things weren't perfect, especially at the end, but I couldn't tell for sure where his mind was at. I was waiting till we were alone and in person together and it basically never came. I was a little worried about him & his mental state near the end, also just worried about us. The time we spent together when he first got back was mainly in groups with other friends though so we didn’t get privacy.

I kinda sorta saw it coming here and there. He seemed a little afraid to commit to me, and much more closeted than me about any of his non-straightness, him being gay-gray-asexual, the gay part was hard given his upbringing and the asexual part he acted like was more private but I... I am not private about this stuff. Lol see this video I just made. So that was part of why I wanted to include David/Keith from Six Feet Under and capture the complexities of internalized homophobia/wishing he was straight/”using me” to be able to say he had a “Girlfriend” as a good thing for his reputation in front of his straight guy friends/co-workers while I kinda felt like I was lying every time I might call him my boyfriend maybe to a co-worker. The whole thing was more complicated than I can really explain right now, but I wanted to try.

After he left me with no explanation of why he “can’t do this relationship anymore”, why we couldn’t even stay friends, with nothing more than answering my initial “Was it something I did??” with a “Not really”, uh... my heart was shattered and I was so angry and so heartbroken and... at first I was a little worried he might be struggling so much mentally that he’d be suicidal and I was checking to see that he still was “Active” on Facebook sometime that day so I’d, I guess be assured he was fine.

He showed me how much grief and sadness I really can feel over a breakup, he affected how I think of so many little things with a twinge of sadness for 6 months now, he may not be the love of my life, but he will always be my first real love. He wasn’t my first boyfriend. But he was my first queerplatonic partner, the first person I fell in love with, and the first relationship I truly had to learn to mourn. He will always be “a” love of my life, in my life story I’ll never forget him. Those 2 years were so significant.

He also has made it really hard for me to forsee ever trusting that a person really means it when they tell me how much they’re looking forward to plans for the future, how committed they are, how much they care about me, etc, because of how suddenly he changed his stances on everything. He left me traumatized to just suddenly go from assuring me yes he wanted to spend Memorial Day in two weeks with me and sending me cards in the mail expressing how happy he was to see me again in person soon, and then the next day be breaking up with me and cutting off all contact whatsoever, ending our friendship and acquaintance entirely. It gave me whiplash. It made me doubt my instincts about other people, and I’m going to have to make an effort to not let him taint any future relationship, if I’m so lucky to one day have one. Which. I’m not holding my breath there...

Because yeah, even now, 6 months later, I am legitimately worried I will never be able to find anyone to co-parent adopted children with who wants a queerplatonic type kissing-free, sex-free relationship with me. I’m trying to think practically about possibly doing the parenting thing single. I just don’t know yet where my life will lead, and if I indeed do any single or joint-parenting thing, it’s still a few years off.

About this video, I wanted to include a mix of friendships and couples to capture how being queerplatonic is neither one nor the other. I’m not “shipping” all these friendships, at least not in the traditional sense. I’m embracing loving them for exactly what they are in canon as a representation of what queerplatonic level bonds can be!

The majority of the ships started as friends and then started kissing/dating, and may or may not have ended up together on the show, but they had this heart to them of deep friendship which helps me relate to them and pushed me to want to include them in this video. I had so many options and some of the ones I chose to include in the end surprised even myself.

Every single pairing in this video remained friends with each other, at the very least, by the end of the TV show, except for the two Parenthood ones and also I think Jake/Peyton never saw each other again. So that’s pretty good, either ending up together or at least being on friendly terms till the end for 18 out of 21 “Ships”. Even one of those two parenthood ones, Ryan & Amber, did end up being co-parents so they are still in each other’s lives, LOL!!

I almost included other model relationships I love on TV shows like Reid/Maeve (Criminal Minds) but so much of their relationship is about literal grief over a death and idk, this is just different. There were tons of choices of ships, more queerplatonic level partnerships in things I watch - remember http://luvtheheaven.tumblr.com/post/155333908172/list-of-queerplatonic-level-relationships-people and well, basically... I watch WAY too much TV. But I ultimately settled on these 21 to get to the heart of what I wanted to go for. I even included two couples I usually consider myself not to ship, Laurel/Oliver and Chloe/Clark. I was never rooting for either, and think Lauriver are much better as friends on Arrow and don’t believe their chemistry, but the way Oliver and Clark act towards Laurel and Chloe respectively really reminds me of some of the moments of unreciprocated feelings Robert seemed to have towards me at times, like he cared deeply but didn’t care as much as I did, etc etc.

Friendships With Fully Incompatible Sexual Orientations to really capture our Asexual and Aro-Spec type of attraction me and my qpp had for each other:

John/Sherlock (to me these are THE classic queerplatonic bond) (BBC Sherlock)

Wilson/House (based off Sherlock Holmes and John Watson, these two also have so much of that vibe) (House M.D.)

Mario/Angus (Code Black)

Scott/Stiles (Teen Wolf)

Neal/Mozzie (White Collar) - it’s important to me that I headcanon them as queerplatonic these days, they are such partners in their lives, it’s like... the commitment, gosh

Friendships that also had one-sided romance or were more complicated:

Caitlin/Cisco (The Flash) - their friendship isn’t more complicated at all, yet, not really. But they are more obviously shippable even if you’re not a slash shipper because they both are straight and female/male. Like they totally could end up together on the show and it wouldn’t surprise me if they go there eventually, who really knows. They have compatible sexual orientations is all. They are therefore “more likely” to find each other attractive than either me or my qpp were likely to have those feelings for each other. That’s why I’m putting them down here.

Brian/Voodoo - Voodoo is asexual, Brian is straight (Sirens)

Karma/Amy - Amy is queer, Karma... well people might debate if she’s straight or not... (Faking It)

Chloe/Clark (Smallville) - I don’t think them dating for about 1.5 episodes out of 10 full seasons and over 200 episodes counts to put them in the category below.

Regular ships/couples, who still had long periods of being “just friends” (before and/or as exes):

Bay/Emmett (Switched at Birth)

Toby/Spencer (Pretty Little Liars)

Jake/Peyton (One Tree Hill)

Laurel/Oliver (Arrow)

Joan/Adam (Joan of Arcadia)

Auggie/Annie (Covert Affairs)

David/Keith (Six Feet Under)

Ryan/Amber (Parenthood)

Jim/Pam (The Office)

Drew/Amy (Parenthood)

Matt/Julie (Friday Night Lights)

Rory/Jess (Gilmore Girls)

Voiceovers:

Toby: I feel like when we’re picturing our future together, we’re not looking at the same picture anymore.

Peyton: Do you want to get married?

Peyton: Giving your heart to somebody; that’s the scary part.

Karma: What do I have to do to get you to stay?

Joan: But you had my heart, Adam!

John (Bay’s father): You okay?

Claire, David’s sister: What do you see in him? Keith: He’s smart. He’s kind. He’s funny. When someone sees you as you really are, and wants to be with you, that’s powerful.

Wilson: I need a friend. I need you to tell me that you love me.

Stiles: What if... What if Scott’s my best friend now, but he’s not my best friend for life?

Ryan: I... I went back, and I re-enlisted.

Mozzie: 48 hours. I hope you’ll come with us. Neal: You’re giving me an ultimatum.

Pam: You were my best friend before you went to Stamford. I- I miss having fun with you.

Brian: You don’t want to have sex, and that’s fine with me. ‘Cause I’m not having sex right now either! I’m just happy being around you.

Amber: I’m so mad at you. I don’t understand why you would leave me.

Amy: I need some space. Drew: How much space? Amy: A lot.

Amy: Karma and I are more than just best friends, we’re soulmates. The normal rules don’t apply to us.

Mycroft (Sherlock’s brother): This is a private matter. Sherlock: John stays. Mycroft: This is family. Sherlock: That’s why he stays!!

Oliver: What’s this for? Laurel: Because you’re important to me.

Laurel: Ollie, I know that I am not the love of your life. But you will always be the love of mine.

Rory: You know, I have actually thought about this moment. What would Jess say to me if I ever saw him again? I mean he just took off, no word, so he couldn’t possibly have a good excuse for that!

Mozzie: And I find myself reminded that... unshared life... is not living.

Jess: You still going to Yale? Rory: It’s really close to here. Jess: 22.8 miles.

Rory: You ended up not coming to my graduation, and leaving again, so... That’s it I guess.

Bay: I waited for you, to come back to me, to talk through what had happened! And I gave you space, and then you... just... you disconnected without telling me! You moved on!

Keith: Fine, why don’t we cut our losses and call it quits right now! David: What? Keith: As long as you feel a need to keep our relationship a secret, David... you’re ashamed of it, man!

Brian: She met him on... one of those Asexual Message Boards.

House: Boy meets girl, boy says, “I’m asexual.” Girl says, “Yeah, me too.”

Wilson: I think they were happy.

Amber: You’ve been through so much, and I hate that you hurt.

Adam: I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to drag you through a whole ‘nother mess, you know?

Matt: You know, with everything that I was going through- Julie: Matt, we were together for almost four years!

Joan: I know.

Julie: I know everything about you!

Amber: I want to have kids with you, and I want to be your wife.

Auggie: This isn’t our song.

Julie: I hate you so much for leaving me. How could you do that to someone you love?

Amber: I loved him, and now he’s gone!

Stiles: Scott, just tell me how to fix this, alright? Please, just tell me. What do you want me to do!

Tami (Julie’s mom): There’s gonna be somebody else special for you. Julie: But it’s not Matt.

#Queerplatonic #Queerplatonic partners #Breakup #fanvideo #fandom

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crimsxnflxwerz · 7 years ago

Text

Don’t Want it Troubling Your Mind [bfu fic] -chapter 3

Don’t Want it Troubling Your Mind Fandom: buzzfeed unsolved Pairing: Shane Madej/Ryan Bergara; Shane Madej & Ryan Bergara Summary: Shane Madej really liked Ryan Bergara. He was funny, a joy to mess with, and took his brand of teasing pretty well. He would consider him a friend, kind of. But when the team goes to investigate the Franklin Castle for ghosts, Shane gets more than he bargained for, and the results could cost him his friendship with Ryan. Rating: teen Warnings: Demonic Possession, Existential Crisis, Complicated Relationships Authors note: This is a repost from Archive for people who don’t like Archive/prefer tumblr/etc. sup guys.

In the middle of their third movie, this one was about strange disappearances, Ryan fell asleep. His head was resting heavily upon Shane’s shoulder. It was a weight that felt strangely nice. Shane nudged a popcorn bowl with his foot that they’d set on the floor, and leaned his head back against the couch. He heard the voice of the narrator on the television saying something about a man who disappeared in Mexico, but he wasn’t really paying much attention anymore.

He thought about how Ryan would probably have a supernatural explanation for this one too. Like the girl who drowned in the hotel water supply, that was a poltergeist, not just a tragic accident. It was almost like Ryan couldn’t really accept that sometimes those things happened. People died, and sometimes we can’t explain why. If this was a time before medicine, he’s sure Ryan would have a supernatural explanation for cancer, for heart attacks, or mental illness. Everyone did, at the time.

He guessed though, that some of those things were real, with his new-found evidence. He had half a mind to ask Anael about the girl at the hotel, or the man in Mexico, or maybe even D.B. Cooper. A part of him, though, wanted to keep it all a mystery. It was more fun that way, he thought. Yeah, they looked at unsolved cases, and yeah, they made him question things a little bit, but ultimately, he stood by what he had said before. He was okay with them being unsolved. It’s so exhausting to go through life trying to solve everything. There wasn’t always an answer, and that was the truth.

He felt Ryan shift a little into him with a soft mutter. He moved his arm so he could put it on the back of the couch, to keep it from getting crushed between them. With his other arm, he grabbed the folded blanket Ryan had taken out for him earlier, and spread it over them.

As the voice on the television droned on, Shane felt himself drifting off. He was warm, and comfortable, and he needed a good rest.

In his dream, he’s hot. He takes off his shirt and starts unbuttoning his pants when he realizes that the heat isn’t coming from the air around him, it’s coming from inside him. He’s not sure what to do, watching his skin as it rapidly dries up, blood rushing through him, his body blushing in awkward patches. He curls up in a ball, breathing heavily. Even his breath scorches his throat.

From behind him, a pair of hands grab his shoulders. They’re cold as ice, and where the hot and cold skin meet, steam billows out. He turns to face the person touching him, but the steam is thick and white and he can’t see through it.

He blinks. He finds himself in a bedroom. It’s a dark blue, light peeking in from the moon illuminating strips over various furniture and clutter. He’s sitting on the bed there, his face turned to the side, watching a body cast in shadow. His own body moves on its own, leaning in towards the figure, and kissing them delicately. The figure lets it happen for a moment, before pushing him back an inch.

“No,” and it’s sounds like Ryan. But why would he be kissing Ryan? His head hurts, his chest hurts. He didn’t mean to do that— The figure gets up, standing in the light, and it is Ryan for a moment. Then his body twists, and he becomes a shadow even in the light, a void of swarming bees. There’s a noise, like static radio, in his ears, drowning out everything else. He can’t move, even though he wants to leave, to get away.

Shane jolted awake, looking around the room frantically. The light in the kitchen was on. The television was turned off, the droning narrator silenced. He looked to his side, and Ryan was gone, but the blanket remained. He looked towards the window to see that it was still dark out. His phone chirped.

Low Phone Battery – 12%

He groaned as he leaned over to dig his charger out of his bag. The blanket slipped off his shoulder onto the couch. He plugged his phone in, and watched it until the screen darkened from inactivity. He rubbed his eyes. He could barely remember his dream now, as the edges of it began to blur and fade, but he does remember something very vividly. He remembered not being able to control his body, feeling trapped as he kissed his friend. He shivered at the mental picture. He didn’t dwell on it, however, and backtracked to the hot and cold. What even was that? He remembered the cold hands from Franklin Castle. The demon named Anael had done that, right? Well, if the demon was actually real, and not just a rabid figment of his imagination.

A clatter in the kitchen, followed by a hushed curse, practically made Shane jump. He stood up sleepily and ducked into the kitchen. The first thing he saw was the time: 3:53 am. The second thing he saw was Ryan bent over to retrieve a metal spoon from the floor. He put the spoon on the counter and started when he saw Shane peaking in.

“Whoa, dude, don’t scare me like that!” Ryan said, smiling a bit and laughing. “I didn’t expect you to be awake. You looked pretty clocked out.”

“Well, with all the noise you’re making,” Shane teased. Ryan flicked at his arm playfully. “Nah, a dream woke me up.”

“Oh? What kind of dream?” Ryan asked, moving the spoon to a cup in the sink. He grabbed a mug on the counter that was steaming slightly. He guessed Ryan made coffee or something. He hadn’t noticed when he first came in, but it did smell like it. He looked around to see what he’d made it with.

“Just a freaky dream about demons or something,” he said quickly, then, “is that coffee? Did you brew a pot or-?”

“Oh, this? I just used my Keurig. Feel free to make yourself a cup, though. I have half and half in the fridge.” He paused, thoughtfully, and took a sip from his cup. “What kind of dreams have demons in them?”

Shane nodded and opened a random cupboard, finding the mugs by luck alone. Well, he figured they were there, because the cupboard was right above the Keurig. He took out one that said, “Boo Bitches” in a font that looked like bones. He related to this mug. “I dunno, the freaky kind?”

While he picked out a kind of coffee to have (Normal or dark? Or really dark. Such a hard decision), Ryan leaned against the counter and sighed.

“Sorry if I drooled on you earlier. I didn’t think I was that tired.” He said. “The guy just kept talking, and his monotone voice put me right out.”

“Haha, no worries. I was surprised your head even reached my shoulder.” Shane teased. Ryan rolled his eyes, but smiled nonetheless.

“You’re the one that’s freakishly tall!” Ryan accused. Shane popped a k-cup into the coffee machine. It read Jim’s Quality Morning Brew. Whatever a morning brew was. He hoped it was good.

“I dunno,” Shane said. He merely shrugged.

“One time you hit your head on an exit sign.”

“That was a low exit sign!” Shane argued, although the point was convincing. “Talk about real fire hazards.”

“Well, they’re not hazards to people of normal height.” Ryan said, unhelpfully. Shane moved over to the fridge and grabbed the half and half. His coffee poured rather loudly into the mug as he glared at his friend.

“Sure, you’re normal height, and I’m a monkey’s uncle.” He said. Ryan laughed, grinning, his hand on his chest. Shane grabbed his cup when it was done pouring, and got a spoon to mix in a bit of half and half. He sipped it, the heat warming his body. He watched Ryan laugh with humor in his eyes.

“Maybe you are!” Ryan chuckled. He took another sip of coffee.

“Did you sleep well, though?” Shane asked.

“Yeah, actually. You’re comfier than you look.” He teased. He scratched he back of his neck. “You look so lanky, but it’s actually kind of nice.”

“That’s good.” Shane paused. The silence between them was soft and natural, and it stretched on a bit while they drank their coffees, both leaning against the kitchen counter. Ryan tapped away on his phone, probably playing a game or something. Shane wished his phone wasn’t in the other room charging, although he probably wouldn’t be able to focus on it anyways.

“What are you doing today at work?” Shane asks.

“Editing the video,” Ryan said. He shrugged. “We got a lot of pretty good footage. Maybe we even found something this time.”

Shane shrugged, but there was a small part of him that felt hot on the inside. He thought about the cold hands from the basement, from his dream. He thought about the static noise. He didn’t want Ryan to find anything. How could he deny what’s happening to him if he caught something on film?

“Maybe we did,” he said. “But probably not.”

Even though they both had coffee, at 4:30am they piled back onto the couch and fell asleep under the blanket. Pressed warmly into each other’s space, their sleep was dreamless and quick. Shane felt as if he’d simply blinked and it was suddenly 9:15am. They got up together, brushed their teeth, and popped two bagels in the toaster oven. Shane complained about plain cream cheese, and Ryan was exasperated ‘What is salmon flavored cream cheese? That sounds disgusting!’ They took their own cars to work. It wasn’t super busy at the moment, but that was good, because they would be less distracted that way.

Ryan started editing the video together, adding the commentary screens and other miscellaneous things that made their show a little quirky. Shane poked around on their social media pages, looking at suggestions for places to go and cases to talk about. Of course, it didn’t take him long to stumble upon the various comments about how the two stars of Buzzfeed Unsolved should get together. Honestly, the comments made him feel so tired, like he was talking to his mother over and over again, and listening to her say ‘you’ll find someone eventually’ until his ears started bleeding. Their favorite thing to point out was his apparent single-ness. Well, he was single, but it was by his own choice. If you don’t go fishing, you never catch any fish. Shane didn’t want to date, so he never went out of his way to find a date. He was perfectly fine making friends at the office, eating lunch with coworkers, and chilling at his apartment alone.

Well, at least he used to like that stuff.

He was going to try and go back to his apartment today, of course. He couldn’t live with Ryan. Well, he could, but it would be kind of rude to just invite himself over for forever, wouldn’t it? He’s sure Ryan wouldn’t want to see his face 24/7 anyway.

Where Shane lacked in dating and going out, Ryan made up. He went out a lot, dated girls on and off. He wasn’t a player, no, none of that. He just wanted to have fun, a lot of his exes remained friends with him, it was no big deal. No one’s expecting him to settle down yet. Well, Shane doesn’t know his friend’s whole life. Maybe he is getting pressured by his family, and just ignoring them, like any other young adult. A few weeks ago, Ryan broke up with that girl Helen Pan. He heard it was mutual, though, so that was good. In fact, Shane’s pretty sure he’s still seen Helen around just as often, looking happy and casual.

He was glad they were still friends. It reminded him of one of his coworkers and close friends Sara. He really enjoyed her company, and there was a point in their relationship where he could have seen himself dating her. He wasn’t sure, though, if he really wanted to date her, or if he was feeling pressured to date someone so that people would stop asking. In fact, there was a day that they’d gone out to lunch together, and he asked her if she wanted to go out for a coffee sometime. It was a sneaky way of seeing if she was interested. Although, it mustn’t have been that sneaky, because she picked up on it immediately.

“Shane,” she said, a soft smile on her face. “Are you asking me out?”

“I- I, uh, I,” he stuttered, a blush spreading across his cheeks. “M-maybe?”

She giggled. “I think you’re a great friend, Shane. Maybe let’s keep it that way?”

Shane let out a long breath. “O-oh.” He was expecting to feel crushing disappointment, but instead he felt a little lighter. “Actually, I’m okay with that.”

As he was daydreaming, staring down his computer, he felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned in his chair and saw that it was their cameraman David. He had a camera bag slung over his shoulder.

“Did the footage turn out okay?” he asked. Shane’s first reaction was to turn and ask Ryan, but when he looked, Ryan wasn’t at his desk.

“Oh, um, I would say ask Ryan, but he doesn’t seem to be here.” Shane said. David shrugged.

“Well, I just ask because the cameras were acting weird today while we were shooting a different video. I hope that the film from Franklin Castle isn’t messed up.” He said. “That was a lot of footage, if it’s messed up…”

“I’ll find Ryan and ask him if he ran into any problems, okay?” Shane said. David nodded and wandered off. Shane looked over at Ryan’s desk again. His laptop was open to the video editing software they use. His headphones were laying haphazardly on his desk, next to a stack of papers and an empty mug.

He figured that Ryan got called away to do something. No need for concern, of course. Although, it must’ve been important for him to stop editing to go do it. One time, Ryan had told him that he either did it all at once, or not at all. It’s a sentiment that people tend to share. Just get it over with while you’re inspired, and then it’ll be done, no more worrying. Shane thought about how hard it was to get back into the swing of something once you’ve left it for a bit.

Just then, his phone buzzed.

Ryan: Dude, you gotta come see this! I’m in the studio.

At the text, Shane’s blood ran cold. Normally, he’d be excited to go in and listen to whatever sound that Ryan thought was a voice, but this time was different. This time, he wasn’t sure what was real and what was fake. He felt himself starting to get a little overwhelmed.

It’s just a video or audio clip, Shane, nothing to worry about.

Shane: Be there in a sec.

He made his way to the studio and peeked inside. He could see Ryan in there, listening to something, adjusting things occasionally. He walked up and knocked on the studio door to get his attention. Ryan turned quickly, and smiled when he noticed Shane. He took the headphones off and let him into the room with him.

“I was looking through the videos, and I realized that some of the clips got a little messed up.” He said. Shane thought back to what David had said about the cameras. “At first, I was a little disappointed with the corrupted video and audio, but then I noticed that it was only happening in a specific part of the house.”

Ryan handed Shane a pair of headphones. When they both had headphones on, he pulled up a video file on a monitor and played it. It was a shot from a camera at the top of the stairs to the basement. The scene where Ryan accused Shane of being scared of the basement. Shane hadn’t even thought about how they were still filming, so it was weird to see the conversation played back. Everything was playing fine, until Ryan started going down the steps. A part of the screen’s pixels seemed to die, and the audio clipped in and out for a bit, before the screen just turned black completely. You could still hear the voices, but they were muted. After about two seconds of this, there was a much clearer voice over the other audio. It was a deep voice, smooth and haughty. It grumbled a little when it spoke, like a warning.

It’s cold, down here.

And then the video and audio went straight back to normal, like nothing had happened. Shane felt like someone had poured cold water down his back. The voice was so clear, so breathy and real. In fact, the video didn’t even have Ryan’s tacky subtitles, but he knew exactly what it had said.

“Well, it,” Shane started, but honestly didn’t know where he was going to go with that.

“That was definitely a voice. Something knew we were there, I would even say it knew we were recording.” Ryan said, excited, but also horrified. “It’s so clear! It said, it’s cold down here. That’s so crazy!”

“That- that’s doesn’t prove anything though,” Shane said, desperately grappling for something to disprove it. “It could be… could be anything. Maybe it’s one of the camera men.”

“Shane, are you serious?” Ryan said, exasperated. “That’s clearly a voice! It doesn’t sound like David or Steve.”

Shane took the headphones off. He felt his head pounding at the evidence. “You must have edited the clip or something. That can’t be real. Ghosts aren’t real.” He knew he sounded crazy right now, but he didn’t care. The voice in his head, the things he was seeing, the demon… it was all real?

“Seriously?” Ryan asked, taking his own headphones off as well. His voice rose. “I wouldn’t fake this. I’ve waited so long for evidence, and you’re just going to tell me I made it all up?”

“I don’t know!” Shane was practically shouting now. “I don’t know what this is! It’s can’t be real, I don’t believe it! I don’t want it to be real! I thought this show was a big joke from the beginning, I never expected it to be serious! I didn’t want it to be!”

Ryan furrowed his brow. He looked mildly offended. “Then why did you even join the team if it was never real to you? How can you not accept evidence right in front of you?”

Shane groaned in frustration. He looked down at his shoes. “I need to go, I’ll talk to you later.”

He turned to leave. As the door was closing, Ryan shouted, “Don’t bother!”

Shane went right back to his desk and packed up his things. He was tired, upset, and confused. He emailed his manager and said he was getting sick, so he went home. He got in his car, throwing his bag in the backseat. Shane sat in the driver’s seat and put his head in his hands.

He flipped open his phone and dialed the number of the last person he texted that wasn’t Ryan. It rang three times.

“Shane?” a feminine voice said on the other end. “Is everything okay? I saw you walk out of the office.”

“I may have fucked up,” he said, his voice a little shaky. “Sara, I really fucked up.”

“What happened?” Sara asked. There was a rustling through the phone, as if she had gotten up or moved. “Do you want to talk in person or-?”

“I- I don’t know,” he stuttered. He felt the headache getting worse. Keeping his eyes open hurt, so he closed them. “I have such a bad headache. I don’t think I can drive.”

“I’m coming to get you. Do you want me to take you home?” her voice was soft, but he could tell she was a little panicked. He wished he could be a little clearer, but his tongue felt swollen in his mouth.

“I- I-“ he tried, but failed to answer. His phone slipped from his hands to the floor of the car. He noticed that he hadn’t turned the car on. He couldn’t remember where he’d put his keys, anyways, so he guessed it didn’t matter. He heard Sara’s voice coming from the phone, a static sound, like an imitation of a human voice.

Why did he say those things to Ryan? Yeah, the show was supposed to be comedic, but that didn’t make it a joke. Ryan worked really hard to get the show to even happen, and Shane just stomped all over it. He wasn’t sure to think. He was pretty sure he was losing his mind. He just hoped he didn’t lose Ryan as well.

A few moments later, his driver’s side door opened, but he was still sitting with his head in his hands, and didn’t respond to the movement. He felt smaller, warm hands on his shoulders, an arm across his back. He leaned into the warmth.

“Shane, what’s wrong?” a voice said. He recognized it as Sara. He wondered if she had trouble finding his car. He always parked in the same space. He was a creature of habit just like anyone else. Why was this happening to him again?

Oh, right. Skeptic. Yeah.

“My head hurts, it must be from fucking up my sleep last night.” Shane said, although he was lying through his teeth. He knew that his headache was from hearing that audio. From seeing that video clip. He knew the headache was from the evidence, the stress, the anxiety. It was real, it was all real. The demon was real, and it really wanted to ruin Shane’s life.

“You said on the phone that you fucked up,” she said, and it was soft and gentle. He always thought her voice was nice. She was small and warm, quirky and funny. She always seemed to know what to say. “What happened? What did you fuck up?”

Shane lifted his head slightly. Though, when he did that it felt as if the world had dramatically tilted, so he put his head back down. “It’s Ryan, I really fucked up with Ryan. He probably hates me now.”

“Oh, no, no, no,” she reassured, rubbing his back in large circles. “You and Ryan, you guys fight, but friends fight. Whatever it was, he probably doesn’t hate you.”

“I called his show a joke.” He admitted. Sara made a soft noise of disapproval.

“Maybe you shouldn’t have done that, per say,” she said. “But he doesn’t hate you. How could anyone hate you? You’re great.”

Shane pulled his hands away from his face, opening his eyes to stare down at them. He heard a small, sharp voice in the back of his head. It said, mockingly, ‘yeah, you’re great.’

“Do you have any migraine medicine?” Shane asked, his voice barely above a whisper. Sara pulled away to rummage through her purse. After a moment, she sighed.

“No.” she said. “Want me to take you home?”

“What about the car?” he asked.

“You could get it later, I’ll tell the supervisor about it.” She said. She gently tugged on his shirt, and he stood, slowly. He blinked open his eyes, and it hurt, but he figured that he wouldn’t get any better sitting around in a parking lot.

Sara took him to his apartment building and made sure he got upstairs and into his place okay. She came in and helped him get something for his migraine, too. He let himself be fussed over, since he was too tired and upset to have done anything anyways. When he was situated on his couch with a pillow and a comforter, Sara put the back of her hand against his forehead. He laughed.

“What do you think, doc? How long do I have?” he joked. She giggled, withdrawing her hand.

“I’d say three months, better get to that bucket list.” She said, and they both laughed. She sat on the arm of the couch and sighed.

“Listen, Shane,” she started. “I don’t really know what happening with you and Ryan, or just you and work, but if you ever want to talk, I’m here for you.” She paused. “Also, I know I really great therapist…”

Shane gave a small huff of laughter. “Thank you, Sara. To be honest, I think I’ve just been stressing myself out lately. I think I’ve just been questioning things lately that I’ve never questioned before.”

Sara tilted her head, reaching down to play with Shane’s hair a little. “Like what?”

“Well, this sounds dumb, but,” he paused, biting his lip. “I’m kind of starting to believe in ghosts? Or maybe I’m just going crazy and I don’t know it?”

Sara laughed. “Oh yeah, you’re definitely crazy.”

“It’s just been a crazy week, I think.” Shane admitted. “It can’t possibly get any worse. I’ll be better next week.”

“Don’t jinx it.” She smiled, giving Shane’s hair one last flick, before standing up. “If I was a witch I would cast a good vibes spell for you.”

“That sounds like it’d be nice,” he said. He really did mean it. Maybe witch stuff was real, too, now.

“I should probably get back to the office now, but if you need anything,” she said. “Don’t be shy, just hit me up.”

“Thanks Sara,” Shane said. “You’re great, you know that?”

“Yeah.”

Then she collected her things, wished Shane one last goodbye, and she was gone. Shane felt comfortable in his apartment, but now that no one else was there, he could tell a sort of tension returned. He closed his eyes, hoping the pain medicine would make him drowsy, so that he could slip into easy unconsciousness. He didn’t want to think about what happened today. He didn’t want to think about how it would change his friendship with Ryan. He didn’t want to think about demons, or ghosts, or witches. He just wanted to sleep.

If only the world would let him do that.

#bfu fic #my fic #buzzfeed unsolved #shyan #shyan fic #me

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pandoraships · 5 years ago

Text

420 views!

Well I promised myself I would do something special for 400 views. I figure if you keep coming back I should thank people for their support. So before I launch into my treat I want to make sure to say:

If you are looking for a sound track for the Fiction please see after the cut!

Also Link to the fan fic here

When I write part of my pre-prep is to make a music list for various scenes and characters. Like an inspiration board. That way I can sort of get a flow to the typing I am doing, or if I feel stuck I can get myself unstuck by listening to the music and getting back in the scene.

I never liked when people put in little stop breaks into fiction, it often breaks the immersion for me, but I also sometimes wish I could just insert a sound track into the page you are looking that will fade in and out as you scroll down the screen.

So in the vein I have sort of organized the songs I listen to into a curated list. This is the “sound track” for the general feel for Shards of Power : Awakening. I’ve given some small commentary about each song, and they are in some “order”. All of these are available on spotify.

Shards of Power: Awakening- A “mixtape”.

1. There is a war going on for your mind - Flobots

The Seers, who you will be meeting very soon, are the True Villains of our setting. They are the men and women who control everything we interact with on day to day basis. The Concillium fight against them, and this small interlude is something I feel that the Free council broadcast, hoping that someone out there still cares enough to listen. I mentally call my music “ Musutafu Awakened Radio” because I like to pretend that Zero is broadcasting this to try to find someone he is desperate to awaken.

2. Defend Atlantis -Flobots

This ultimately is the explanation of the world. It’s got some really excellent segments that explain the Orders best.. It’s like this entire thing was custom built for the World of Darkness. The relevant segments are as follows :

Free Council - From “ We flow like water” To “ Many tales radiate from one nexus.“ The Free council is the counter cultural revolution, and they believe that Humans, more than anything, hold the key to magic. They reject the idea that a chosen few know the truth and believe that the many tales people tell all reflect the true world in some way.

Mysterium- From “That which creates Life” To “ with nothing left to plunder “. The Mysterium is the idea that one should be beholden not to a faction but to the Truth of the world. They are the “mad Scientist” Mage that is determined to make the world better through finding the scraps of magic and figuring out how to recreate them. They want to do this to save the world from it’s fate.

Sliver Ladder- From “For Centuries” to The most diverse aversions when I first channel”. The Silver Ladder are corporatism incarnate, but they believe that stories, laws, and history make magic, and that upholding them and being judged not on merit alone is ultimate way to unite people.

The Adamantine Arrow - From “ Is that all you hold for a warriors roll” to “ Only sea to shining sea.” The Arrow are incredibly service oriented and see themselves as the point of last defense. They believe that they as mages should not rule but serve as a defense for Sleepers until the world becomes one.

The Guardians- From “And survival hinged on the ascent by the humble” to “ And the voices were many but we spoke as one “. The Guardians are a hard group to understand, but they believe that the world is by nature corrupt and corrupts those around them. They believe magic needs to be controlled and placed in the right hands, and that they stand as a guardian against the corruption. They believe that if they stand their ground and route out corruption they can help make sure the right people get in place to storm the gates.

3.Farthest star - VnV nation

This is the awakening song for every path, though I most often place Obrimos under this particular song. It’s very broad and light and hopeful in a way that the act of Awakening is.

4. Handlebars -Flobots

The feeling of doing anything that comes after awakening is something every mage goes through. Having access to the unlimited cosmic power of the universe is a hell of rush, but the problem is the crash. You can’t get enough to do what really matters, and you could destroy the world in trying to save it.

5. Uprising - Muse

The understanding that their limits are imposed by the world around them and the Archmages that inhabit the Supernal world created this world leads most Concillium mages to feel like they need to rebel. The alienation of know you could have the power promised of people weren’t keeping it from you is what drives many of even the oldest mages.

6. Freak Radio Edit - Timmy Trumpet

The Concilium is a group of people who reject the world around them and they tend to connect over their feeling of being freaks. It’s a fun song, and I like to think that Zero has done that one “When X isn’t home” Tictok thing with Deku once.

7. Shatter me- Lindsey Sterling

As a mage grows in power it tends to have a feeling of being locked into place. More often than not they are kept in control by those around them but they are acutely aware that “ If I break the glass, then I'll have to fly //There's no one to catch me if I take a dive “

8. A Moment of Silence- Streetlight manifesto

Mages often come to a point where they begin to doubt if they can throw out the Archmages in the Supernal world, if they can make it work. They regret having lost the comfort of being a sleeper. And they realize quickly that Casting isn’t always what they want to be...

9. My Demons - Starset

Casting has a down side, it opens you out into the open for the Abyss to feed off your magic and infect you. If you cast enough in a reckless way you can eventually become tainted by the abyss. You can break in ways that can kill yourself, or worse make you turn your powers on everything around you.

10. I’m Alive -Becca

And yet you have to keep going, because you are are there, and you have to fight, even if everything goes wrong, because refusing to give in is what being awakened is.

11. We are Giants - Lindsey Sterling

And when a group of them struggle, when they connect and find themselves in the same path as those who understand them they can do anything. Also this is a fun song and I love the music video that goes along with it.

12. Warriors- Imagine Dragons.

Another song about gathering together to do good, with the understanding that sacrifices will happen but that if one day it changes the world it’s worth it.

13. One for the Money- Escape the Fate

The marching song for those who want to change that world. For some reason it lets me imagine mages all charging upwards across the abyss, spells going off.

14. A moment of Violence- Streetlight Manifesto

This is a good wrapping point, and I like the ending trumpets fading back into the first song. It’s an awesome transition.

Bonus for having 42 kudos (because that is the answer to Life the universe and everything) I’ve included some background music that I use for fight scenes and exciting moments that don’t fit the over all mage theme:

1. Strange Games- Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles

I love this techno beat with the psychedelic sound and flutes. It’s very much what I listen to when I type for the Southern Courts or more fantastical moments. It also doubles as any time we have Bakugo on stage fighting.

2. Song of storm and Fire - Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles

This is my fight music song, coupled with the next few. It’s very broad and powerful, the vocals adding a sort of angelic sense to the pounding beat, and the slow soft break half way through the song is always mentally a “freeze frame” for me. Normally matched to fights involving Izuku.

3. Break the Sword of Justice- Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles

Do you all see a pattern here? If you want some top tier music that you can type to that isn’t lyric driven you want Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles osts. Sadly Spotify and a lot of other places don’t like giving us access them. Oh well I get at them.

Heavier than it’s prior counter part it is a lot of thrumming strings and frantic movement. I like to think of this as Kirishima’s music for fighting.

I don’t actually have an instrumental for Todoroki yet, but To be honest he’s probably some epic japanese peice I haven’t heard yet.

4. Finally This song mix. Yes this is Gravity falls but the two songs are perfect for angst. Give the artist some love!

Thank you again for reading and Thank you again for your kind words and attentions. I will have the next chapter out!

And if you want specific Sound tracks please feel free to ask!

#sountrack #bnha #fanfic #bnha fanfic

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shimadatales · 7 years ago

Note

this is the arcade headcannon person (the one where Hanzo is good at video games) could I have a imagine or something of Hanzo's s/o finding him in an arcade, like she had no idea he even liked video games and he just impresses her with his talent and he wins her a stuffed animal or something?

Ohh, I wanted to write something for this as well actually! So, it became quite long. Hope you like it :) Also, I made it more gender neutral it seems. Hope it’s not a problem. If you like something different, please tell me!

It has beena long day of work for you and you were in need of some relief in some kind. Playingvideo games or any other type of game really, was always an interestingactivity for you, one that you held close ever since you were a child. Gameswere the ultimate stress reliever and the local arcade never failed to amuseyou with the newest editions. As you bid your boss and colleagues good evening,you went on your way to the bustle of excitement that was the arcade. Itsbooming techno music and bright lights already falling into your vision andhearing. You honestly couldn’t care less about the music, as you often found ittoo noisy, but the lights definitely gave the place a certain kind of aestheticand you couldn’t help but feel like a teenager again, whenever you entered. Youdecided to play one of the RPG games this evening and made yourself comfortableat the back of the room, save for a few people, you were the only one sittingthere. Just as you were about to start up your game, a loud cheery noise camefrom the arcade box seated next to you, apparently the person had won a jackpotof some sort. You only looked briefly at the screen of the person’s game, tosee what they had won, but another game had already started and the person wasonce again completely immersed in their next prize, not paying attention toanyone that might be peeking at their gameplay. The prizes you could win atthese types of games varied, as they were different from the claw machines. Youcould win tickets of a certain value, which you could then turn in for the respectablereward it possessed. The person appeared to be quite skilled at his games, as apile of unspent tickets laid neatly beside them.

Shrugging,you once again directed your gaze at your own screen as the game was about tostart, hoping you would be just as fortunate with the prize tickets as theperson next to you. Perhaps their luck would wander over to you as well. As thebouncy and cheery voices of the arcade box next to you became more frequent,you couldn’t help but be distracted by this person’s talent once again and youwere even slightly starting to think that this person might even be cheating astheir prizes kept flooding in. But then again, cheating in an old fashionedarcade was not as easy as with digitalized ones. You decided to indulge moreinto this ‘mystery competitor’ and paused your own game, turning your head tothe screen next to you. Your eyes went from the lively pictures on the box tothe person sitting in front of it and you got a more clear look of said personnow as you narrowed your eyes at their figure. They wore nothing but a hoodedsweater and a pair of jeans, the hood of the sweater carefully secured on theirhead, which made their full identity tricky to detect. And they also seemed tobe wearing sunglasses? Whatever this person’s motive or occupation was, theyclearly did not want anyone close to them finding them here or noticing themand you became all the more curious about the reasoning behind it. What if theywere some kind of criminal on the run? But then, why would a criminal hang outin an arcade for children. You shook off your anxious thoughts and closed youreyes as your rational being took control of you once again. Perhaps this personwas just shy and introverted, not wanting anyone to disturb their concentrationeither. A truly passionate gamer you thought as you fondly looked back at yourown childhood in which you spent many hours doing quite the same.

Somethinginteresting caught your attention though, as you often had an eye for detail.You couldn’t help but notice a trace of a particular tattoo resting on theperson’s left arm as they lightly moved it to get into a more comfortableposition, the sleeve of their sweater slightly rolling up in the process. Wereyou dreaming, or did this person possess the same tattoo as your significantother? You knew that more people had dragon tattoo’s, obviously, but none wereas define as the one Hanzo carried with him. This one was quite a similarresemblance to his own and now that you looked closer at this person’s posture,they seemed to be around the same height as well. Much to your curiosity, youdid not notice the person slightly tensing up at your analyzing gaze. He waslong aware that you were watching him and was silently wishing you would notnotice him and leave him in peace, so he wouldn’t have to embarrass himself infront of you and would come home to you after he was done, however he was quitewrong. Hanzo should have known you would be able to notice him somehow, youwere always so attentive and often knew him better than he did himself, much tohis dismay. He did not want you to know that he, Hanzo Shimada, fearlesswarrior and former heir to one of the greatest criminal empires, the embodimentof sophistication and a true master at every art a man could possess, too,liked to spent his leisure time occasionally in a busy arcade room. For him, itbrought back many memories of his once carefree days with Genji, which he infact did enjoy but never told so, which was the main reason for his visits.However, through time he had also come to enjoy it as a place to let out somefrustration onto a programmed world, which was sometimes a bit easier when a practicerange was not in reach and it was honestly out of a big feeling of boredom aswell. Without intending so, he became the skilled gamer he was in the past whenhe competed with his brother in various games, once again and actually couldget some enjoyment out of it now and then. Right now however, he made a quickrun for it to the ticket booth to hand over his tickets and get out of theplace, before you were able to look under his hoodie and see his face. Youwould definitely be able to recognize him then, even with his sunglasses on,cursing himself for his signature beard in that moment.

You lookedon in confusion as the seemingly, male person, hurriedly scrambled out of hisseat, his prize tickets crumpled tightly in his hands. You also noticed that heapparently forgot a few of his tickets as they fell down around him and youpicked them up before sprinting after the man. Hanzo never held secrets fromyou and never liked to lie either, but he couldn’t bear to be in such anembarrassed position, would you be able to see him like this, almost an addictover this type of amusement. No, he could not allow it. He waited with anagitated expression, as well as his posture, until the man behind the booth scannedover all of his tickets. How foolish of him, why did he even bother turningthem in, you were of course, following him with his lost tickets, like the goodperson you were and Hanzo couldn’t help but feeling like he wanted to disappearright then and there as you tapped his shoulder lightly, pushing the fallentickets into his hands. It was one of the reasons he fell so hard for you inthe beginning and he sighed in defeat as he could no longer hide his shame fromyou any longer. He slowly turned himself to you, a bead of sweat noticeablyrolling down his forehead as you looked up innocently at him with a sheepishsmile. “You lost these, mister.” The archer looked at the few tickets that hehad left behind and took them from you, muttering out a low thank you, hopingsomehow that you still had not recognized him. His voice however, only seemedto link things together in your head again, which you had tried to shake offbefore. He also wrote the same facial hairstyle, now that you had a front face viewand you tentatively called out his name, quickly saying that he looked familiarto someone else as to not make things embarrassing, in case it was not the sameperson. Hanzo slumped his shoulders and sighed heavily again, slowly removinghis sunglasses from his face to reveal the piercing dark eyes of your lover.You probably had never been this surprised in years, to see your boyfriend in aplace like this? Ones he always said he despised so much? He was truly one bigcontradiction sometimes. Your face revealed the obvious surprised expression inturn, as well as some kind of hidden excitement and Hanzo sharply averted his gazefrom you. “Not a word. I come here simply to practice my alacrity and forfurther cognitive enhancement.” You couldn’t help but smile devilishly at hispoor explanation of his reasoning for him being here, never admitting towanting to have some fun and relaxation, as is your grumpy boyfriend.

He wasright in a certain way though, as games can often help you with yourconcentration and reaction speed, and besides, it must have been hard enoughfor him already to have been caught in a place like this. His pride wasobviously hurt a little and so, you decided not to tease him any longer aboutit and asked if he wanted to try out some games together, now that you hadfound each other here anyway. The archer reluctantly agreed, still seeminglyantsy about the fact that he was discovered and actually did not want you tosee him meddling around with these games any longer, but you seemed quitethrilled over trying out some of the harder ones and actually said he was veryskilled and one of the best gamers you had come across, not viewing it assomething childish at all. Hanzo did not like to see you upset, so he wentalong with your wishes and the two of you made your way over to the claw cranes.You always wanted to try your luck at these machines, but they never allowed youto win anything special, as they made them often with slight defects onpurpose, making winning something very difficult. It was not surprising thatHanzo even had a hand of skill in these, taking over once you became frustratedwith your own attempt and failing miserably and winning a small toy after justthe first try. He said that timing was key and a watchful eye at that,something that you can train yourself in and you continued to listenattentively at his advice as you tried the next round together. The archeralways liked teaching you new things and often tried to reassure you as wellwhenever you became bummed out if something did not work out. Consistency isessential and eventually, you will be able to master it as well. It was quiteromantic really, as he held your hand that was on the joystick, moving it withhis own in the right direction. His face was barely touching your own and hisbreath was hot in your ear as he instructed you at the same time. To him, itwas but a simple demonstration, but you couldn’t help but blush heavily underhis ministrations, almost losing your focus in the process. Hanzo knew verywell what he was doing deep down though, as a slight smirk was visible on hisface.

After thetwo of you had won a medium sized teddy bear together, you shyly thanked him ashe gave it to you rather forcefully, once again embarrassed by this sort ofdisplay of affection. You only giggled at his rather ruffled up appearancethough and said you appreciated his tutorial. The archer still deemed you inneed of more education of the subject and told you so as he made his way overto the next row of claw machinery. In fact, it was actually an excuse to winyou some more of those ‘ridiculously soft looking stuffed animals’ and see thatjoyful smile on your face once again. You never complained though, knowing heactually did enjoy playing with these things, as a competitive look replacedthe previously dull and uninterested one from before. The prizes seemed to flowin as well and at some point you had to refrain him from winning anything more,as the bigger ones were almost too much to carry. With a gesture of “For you.”He gave them all to you, including the prizes he had won earlier with his owntickets when you so cautiously looked him over, a delicious red color paintedon his cheeks as he averted his eyes from you. You gasped at the many gifts hebestowed on you, refusing at first as he worked so hard to obtain them. Thearcher merely scoffed in response, saying it was barely a challenge for him andhe has no use for such things. Once you knew it was alright to accept them, yougave him a kiss on his cheek as a thank you, making Hanzo cough up slightly outof embarrassment in response. He did very much enjoy your displays of affectionthough, but often did not know how to react on them. Often awkwardly squeezingyour hand in both of his in return, as he did now. You wholeheartedly squeezedback to reassure him you were appreciative of his effort to return the gestureand the two of you played a few games more before you went on your way home,making sure to go for the smaller prizes this time. You even made a few moreattempts at winning something for your boyfriend and was able to win him somecute trinkets, which he accepted of course. Even though he was not very fond ofthem himself, if he would get them from you, they were special. After all, hewould never turn down a gift from you as he loved you greatly.

#hanzo x reader #hanzo shimada x reader #overwatch #overwatch x reader #overwatch imagines #overwatch hanzo #hanzo shimada #hanzo imagine #anonymous

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evenstevensranked · 7 years ago

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#32: Season 1, Episode 7 - “Foodzilla”

Louis convinces Ren to let him do a live news segment on the school lunch lady for the Wombat Report. Unfortunately, his inability to be serious turns the story into a fiasco -- ultimately causing the lunch lady to quit her job.

The episode opens with Louis and Ren walking home from school. He’s nagging her and asking “please?!” over and over. This is obviously setting us up to wonder what the heck he’s asking for. Side note: I love how even though I know they filmed the interior shots of the house on a set, I STILL like to think they used the real house from time to time, lol. This is another one of those instances. They’re walking out and about in the real world, up until they reach their front door. You can’t tell if they’re still outside or if they’ve captured great artificial “natural” light. Gahhh. You can also hear legitimate sounding wind and cars driving by, which is either great sound editing or... ya know, they were actually at the house. In which case.. IT TOTALLY IS THE SAME INSIDE!

Yeah, this is definitely (probably) my wishful thinking talking tbh. The more I stare at these images the more it looks like a set with bright lights... But still.

Anyway, nerd analyzation aside... Turns out Louis desperately wants to host a segment on the premiere installment of the Wombat Report, which Ren is in charge of. He says that he could make her a comic masterpiece, which is where Ren immediately shuts any prospect down. Naturally, she absolutely will not allow it because she thinks Louis is incapable of taking anything seriously. I don’t blame her. If only she could lighten up, though.. Louis probably could’ve delivered something great, hilarious and take it seriously. I would’ve loved to see that, tbh.

Literally a million scenes/lines from this episode were used in Disney Channel promos for the show. Including “You think I need to shave my pits?” “I rest my case.” which happens around this point of the episode.

Louis heads out to the backyard, where Eileen is attempting to do Tai-Chi. The only problem is that she can’t find the right music to help her relax. Louis confides in her about the Wombat Report situation, and she tells him if he really wants to do it, the only option is to take it seriously and present Ren with a professional idea. She invites Louis to try exercising with her “Do this with me! It’s called: Golden Chicken Stands on One Leg.” Louis gives up right away and says:

So freaking good. Louis Stevens is all of us.

Eileen eventually looks though Ren’s CD collection for better relaxation tunes and chooses Limp Bizkit. Oh my god. “The Limp Biscuits. That sounds relaxing” she says. bahaha I can’t.

The next day at school, Louis tries to figure out a good idea for a story and goes to Twitty and Tawny for help at lunch. Twitty suggests that he do a behind the scenes look at his band, The Alan Twitty Project! Ahhhh! This is the first ever hint at the band arc! :D He also says that his lead singer has mono. The number one sickness mentioned on teen shows that literally no one I’ve ever known in real life has contracted. We get another one of those lines used in promos here: Louis: “You think I’m just some goofball who can’t be serious?” Twitty and Tawny: “...........yeah.”

Right about now is when Louis gets the bright idea to do his story on the school lunch lady.. played by Wendy Worthington who’s been in a zillion things you’ve probably seen. Including “Tower of Terror” -- the single most horrifying movie to ever air on Disney Channel. (Well, except for “Don’t Look Under The Bed.”) There’s a decapitated corpse and doll in the film. Just sayin.

She’s honestly really good at playing a creepy lady, I guess. Also, the little girl is Morgan from Boy Meets World... which instead of a direct parallel, you could consider a 6 degrees of separation deal between this show and BMW. I mean, that’s kinda reaching... but.

Just for the laughs, here’s me on the ride at Disney World. I was... well, terrified of it, but oddly obsessed at the same time. Also, that is my uncle laughing at me to my right.

Louis presents Ren with a rough draft of his report “The Lunch Lady: Life Behind The Hairnet” which seems extremely promising. Ren thinks so too, and allows him to do the segment. We sort of get mirror talk that night... but not really. It’s just Louis practicing various ways to act on air -- another bit used in promos.

Okay, we’ve finally reached the debut of The Wombat Report! For some reason Ren can’t correctly pronounce “Wombat Report” and says “Wombat Waport” I never understood this until I asked my mother for confirmation today. Louis refers to her as “Bawa” (a.k.a Barbara Walters) at one point, so I always assumed this was a reference to her or something... turns out my assumption was correct. I apologize for being an uncultured swine.

They start off with a “Coming up...” intro that features a character named DaNica Henderson (played by Alexis Lopez from The Luck Of the Irish, whose sister is Bianca Lopez a.k.a Mandy “Always Gets Her Man” Sanchez! Holy crap!) To quote Season 3 Louis:

DaNica says “Ever wonder what happens to the fines you pay on overdue library books? I have a shocking report.” And the camera zooms out to reveal a fancy sports car in the librarian’s parking spot:

Like, wth?! lol. Imagine if the librarian saved up enough piddly overdue fines to buy a freaking lambo or something?! omg. What’s funnier is that I’m picturing the stereotypical, old lady librarian driving around in that car.

They segue to a sports report by the underused Artie Ryan. Yesssss. He’s interviewing Twitty about a recent basketball game. This scene cuts to Louis, who’s on next, telling Tom (who of course is the AV guy/cameraman) that he’s just gonna wing the interview with the lunch lady. Not good. When it cuts back to Artie’s segment, we get another one of those backends to a random sentence from Twitty: “...Let’s just say it’s the last time I played without a cup.” Oh my god. Chill, Disney. Twitty takes this on-air opportunity to say that his band is looking for a bassist. Artie leans in like “Hey! I play bass!” lol. This is so great because Artie goes on to join The Alan Twitty Project/Twitty-Stevens Connection! Again, very cool to see the band arc starting to form. Gotta love solid continuity.

It’s time for Louis’ report and, well... this is just one of those absolutely iconic scenes ya gotta embed:

youtube

“It’s FOODZILLA! Tokyo is dooooomed!” (At least, I think that’s what he’s saying.)

..........as you can see, Louis started off his live-streamed interview sort of okay? And then it all just went down in flames pretty quickly. Only Louis Stevens could take an interview from a simple question, to a full out food war between the news crew and the Lunch Lady. It’s actually pretty hilarious, but you just cannot help but cringe at the fact Louis f’d up… again -- Much like his meltdown in Wild Child. But, I’m ranking this disaster higher because I find it less horrible than tarnishing the name of his own family and jeopardizing Eileen’s campaign on television. It’s a lil less cringy than that, which makes it funnier. I love how he shouts “MAN DOWN! I’ll try to get’cha out! I’ll try to get’cha!” as if they’re literally at war, which is too much lol.. and also predicted Shia’s future...? (Again, I’m reaching, but STILL.) That ending shot scene of Ren fuming with anger was also used for promos. Actually, you can just check out this promo video I posted recently to see every moment I’ve mentioned so far and then some.

To Ren’s surprise, everyone (including Principal Wexler for whatever reason) loved Louis’ segment and thought it was hilarious. DaNica refers to it as “phat” which definitely dates the show, lol. Just like that, Ren switches gears and tells Louis to prepare another segment. Wow. Unfortunately, at lunch that day.. all the kids start taunting the lunch lady by screaming “FOODZILLA!” at her. This one kid was the first one to shout it, and I always thought he was Khleo Thomas (Zero from Holes) lol:

The lunch lady is obviously mortified and runs away into the kitchen. :( Louis and Ren feel incredibly remorseful. When they get home from school, they tell Eileen everything and she forces them to go to the lunch lady’s house and apologize. (This is also the “You are a horrible little person” bit. As seen in that darn promo I linked.)

They go to her house later that night, and she reluctantly invites them in. We learn that her name is Elsa Schotz, and she “shows them who she really is” by yodeling for them. I don’t know how that’s supposed to reveal her true colors, but ok. We find out that she came over on a boat from Europe to become a professional yodeler, but sadly no one cares about yodeling in America — which is most definitely extremely factual. Have you ever heard a Top 40 yodeling hit? Honestly, why would ANYONE travel to America of all countries to pursue a yodeling career? She was already in Europe! That seems like something you’d go to Germany or Switzerland for??? I feel like this is a career endeavor you’d research where it’s most lucrative before moving to another country? Anyway, once she found out that yodeling work literally does not exist in the US, she started cooking at the school for money. But, now she’s depressed because she’s being made fun of.

This information somehow leads to Louis and Ren giving her a makeover??? I never realized it before, but that almost makes no sense? The kids at school weren’t making fun of her for the way she looks, but rather, because of her crazy outburst. I’d be so insulted and confused if I were Elsa. Is the makeover just a way to... somehow distract from the Foodzilla thing? Idk. She forgives them in the end though and her new-look gives her a confidence boost.

Where’d they get that outfit? Did she just happen to have something snazzy like that in the back of her closet? or did they seriously glamify her uniform?

They were pumped for the kids at school to see the “new and improved” Elsa Schotz, but she doesn’t show up the next day. Turns out she struck up a relationship with the school janitor and they eloped to Las Vegas to get married. Still a better love story than Twilight.

And that’s pretty much it! The short return after the last commercial break is Louis yodeling for Eileen while she does her Tai-Chi.

This episode remains super memorable. Probably because how many freaking scenes they used on commercials! It also aired a lot as well. Like, wow. But other than the actual Foodzilla scene, the rest of the episode is just a little bland and slightly random at times haha. It’s still good though. It’s nice to see Louis and Ren work together to help Elsa in the end.

Thoughts?

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#rank #even stevens #louis stevens #shia labeouf #disney channel #old disney #nostalgia #old school disney #ren stevens #christy carlson romano #wendy worthington #foodzilla #season 1 #band arc #the twitty stevens connection #the alan twitty project #artie ryan

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flowermikonotebook · 8 years ago

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Meeting Toshihiko Seki - Part 4

I had this finished a month ago but once again like usual, real life gets in the way of me editing it. But it’s time to finish like I swore I would, even if it took me this long. So here it is, the final day of meeting Toshihiko Seki & perhaps the most important day with lessons to be learned & a total fangirl confession...oh my!

Again, as a disclaimer, what’s written is entirely my personal opinion, although I’ve striven to the best of my ability to recall as much as possible purely from memory. All my questions are Saiyuki related. It’s a long read, so TL-DRs beware, and I meant it when I say it’s long. Otherwise thank you for stopping by and enjoy!

Sunday, August 7th: The Third Autograph and the Last Q&A

The time change was probably throwing me slightly off (Vancouver is two hours behind Houston time). Nonetheless, it felt great to wake up a little “earlier” than usual when in fact I was sleeping my longer usual hours on the weekend! Besides, Saturday’s events had left me tired to say the least. I decided to take my time that morning prior to going to the last autograph session & go on a short ride through Vancouver’s SkyTrain high speed rail and take a few pictures for my family.

But! By roughly around noon I was back at the Vancouver Convention Centre for one last autograph from Seki-san. My final CD choice for today would be Sanzo’s Character CD from 2013. Still, a part of me kept regretting not having brought back up items to be signed (I had intended to bring one Minekura wall-scroll but ultimately forgot to grab it from my room).

The Autograph Tables with Romi Park (from the AniRevo Closing Ceremonies Video)

Same as the previous days, I lined up in the VIP line with my CD in hand. Tara was already there in line and we started talking while we waited for the autographs to begin. I took a look to the side and spotted Seki-san along with Shiori & other helpers walking by to the wall far to our right. Nothing stood out other than them eventually coming back around to behind the dividing curtain behind the autograph tables.

I can’t remember how soon it happened after that, but as I continued to talk with Tara & another fan about wanting to find some other item to get signed, suddenly the loudspeaker came on: it was Seki-san speaking in English!

What a random, out of nowhere moment, and I only wish I could remember exactly what he said! All I can recall is him coming on the loudspeaker with a really warm voice saying “Hey! This is Toshihiko Seki from…” and I believed mentioned a few of the series he worked in, along with something how much fun he was having being here. The atmosphere had certainly changed since Friday when he first met up with fans and seemed much more reserved. I noticed this too when I met Suwabe Junichi at AX, but I’ll go into analyzing that some other time. What I am saying is, there’s certainly an effect and a period of guest seiyuus “warming up” to meeting international fans and I’m happy that Seki-san had felt so welcomed and warmed up to us.

Not much later after Seki-san spoke on the loudspeaker, he and Shiori stepped out from behind the curtain and walked to the autograph table. Like on Saturday, we’d let some of the regulars go first, since after all we had at least one signed item already. Before I knew it, my turn to get my autograph came. The next thing I knew, I was wishing I’d kept my “flowermiko” name card I had saved from AX and regretting I couldn’t find it because the moment I got to the table Shiori tells me “today we got more time, so he can sign the album with a dedication to you.”

. . . . . .

Needless to say, I was scrambling to find in my bag pen & paper so I could scribble down “FLOWERMIKO” for Seki-san he could copy & autograph my CD. Oh, but getting it signed with my name wasn’t going to be the kicker at all.

As Seki-san is signing my Sanzo Character CD, he suddenly asks me (and Shiori translates) about the meaning behind “flowermiko”. Precisely he asks “Is it a nickname of some sort?”.

You know, one thing is over the years of being a Saiyuki fan coming up with an Original Character/self-insert/you-get-the-drill thing like most fangirls do because you want to romance a guy in the series cause you ain’t into BL either and who cares if in my own private RPs I get to confess & romance Sanzo. But…having to more or less CONFESS to otherwise Sanzo-sama (or Seki-san anyways as the voice of Sanzo) that “flowermiko” is a “code name” for my own original character for Saiyuki is something that would have NEVER -EVER- CROSSED MY MIND that it would happen!

With a thousand thoughts scrambling through my mind & starting to feel a tinge of embarrassment, I try to put together as much of a mildly simple & generic explanation as possible. For the curious, “flowermiko” stands for “cherry blossom miko priestess” which is the code name for my OC “Tenjou Sakura”.

But thoughts pulled together and what felt like taking an inner deep breath, I tell Seki-san “’flowermiko’ is a character inspired by Saiyuki as a ‘companion’ character to Sanzo more or less.” Simple enough answer, right? However, to my sheer embarrassment and Seki-san’s amusement, he appears to see right through my answer as he looks at me rather very amused and says -very- assured of himself “Ah…I see” (and I still hear this in my mind as “naru hodo” just as he said it).

Honestly, I don’t know if he was more amused at my silly answer, or the fact that I was so flustered about confessing that, or that to him it was pretty obvious the precise kind of Sanzo fangirl that I am. I’m sure my friends would’ve had a field day seeing me in the moment, hah hah (or even better, how much I was flailing my arms and legs in bed later back at my hotel that night thinking back all that actually happened). But I recall back on it fondly. I’m sure it wasn’t anything new to Seki-san to hear how much fans like Sanzo, but I stand by what I’ve been saying since I began writing this: if it wasn’t for how Seki-san has voiced Sanzo and for so long, I don’t think I’d be half as much into him. Minekura-sensei of course created the character, but it’s all Seki-san that truly brings him to life. What can I say? I love Sanzo <3

And after all of that, Seki-san hands me my now autographed CD with a “To flowermiko (from) Seki-san”. I smile and thank him for signing it and we shake hands one last time before I exit the autograph area.

Score! Got Sanzo’s Character CD autographed with my nickname.

As I walked out of the autograph area, I had this lingering feeling that I really wished I could have gotten something else autographed by Seki-san, but what could I? Silly me had left back up items to be signed at home. But I figured for all I knew perhaps in the albeit small dealer’s room, I could find something Saiyuki I could get him to sign. So, I made a quick round around the dealer’s room but found absolutely nothing.

Feeling a little disappointed, I went back to the autograph area to see how Tara & the others were doing. Tara was already lining up to get some more things signed for friends back home. When I tell her how I couldn’t find anything else to get signed, she suggests “Why don’t you get your bag signed?” At first I blinked at her thinking the idea was odd but it quickly began to sink in, well why not?! I was a bit hesitant at first thinking that I didn’t have any fabric markers or anything but Tara told me Seki-san had plenty of different markers at the table.

No room for argument there, so it was decided: I would get my old but beloved baggy autographed. As we talked with the same girl from earlier (she’d lined up again as well to get her badge autographed) I had a sudden idea: I recalled from multiple Saiyuki books that I bought that quite often when an interview with Seki-san was included or some sort of autograph, he would often sign it as “3ZO” (because by now we all agree he IS Sanzo, right?). Most of you probably know it, but the number three in Japanese is pronounced “San” which is also the first kanji of Sanzo’s name is “三” from “三蔵” (San-zo). So, if I could just be this little bit greedy, I wanted to ask him if he could sign my bag exactly like that.

Without hesitation, the moment I get to the table I tell Shiori I would like to have my bag autographed, as well as if she could ask Seki-san if he could sign it as “Sanzo”. I wasn’t sure at first if he’d do it or not, but the writing on my bag spoke for itself: as soon as Seki-san switched out to a better marker that he liked, he wrote “三ZO” followed by his actual autograph.

And like they say, pictures or it didn’t happen, hah hah.

~*~

A close up of Seki-san’s “三ZO” autograph.

I can’t remember how many times I’d seen his “三ZO” autograph through different Saiyuki books, anime guides, shikishi, etc., so between ever getting to meet Seki-san & getting his autograph, getting his Sanzo autograph was the cherry on top of the cake! One more time, because I’d never get tired of saying “thank you” to someone so special to me, I thanked Seki-san and stepped away from the autograph area as things began to wrap up. I ran into Tara & our other friend and showed off my now autographed baggy. I’m so glad she put the idea on my head and convinced me to get it signed—if I hadn’t I think right now I’d instead be kicking myself for it instead of writing about it!

With the last autograph session over, I went wondering about the convention for about an hour while waiting out the time to line up for the last panel. And before I knew it the hour flew by and I was back to the area where everyone lined up for panels. I noticed that the same Japanese girls from the previous day were there once again. I waved hi to them, though I still felt like kicking myself I didn’t even know how to say a thing in Japanese. Honestly, I worry about silly things like “omg, what are they going to think of the big plus sized girl…” not that things like that should matter, right? It’s like I have this incorrect thinking that in Japan there is a stigma against pochacco (“plus size” and there is), because am plus size, I would come off as an unapproachable person. As it turns out, by the end of my time at the convention, I’d learn how completely wrong I was about that.

Perhaps because I had my Saiyuki ita bag with me, it sent off the right signal I am just another fangirl. So, the next thing is I’m suddenly approached by the duo with one of them holding her phone in her hand. Even if we were unable to talk because of the language barrier, she had “Google Translate” open on her phone to try to ask me if anyone had asked Seki-san about the “Saiyuki Reload Blast” anime. I didn’t think about anything else other than I had to somehow reciprocate the effort and try to answer back! I had to think a bit to figure out Google Translate’s garbled version of the question (which came out something like either Saiyuki Blast Bombs or Saiyuki Explosions…), but once I did, it was funny to hear myself pronounce “Sa-i-yu-ki Re-ro-do Bu-ra-su-to” but at least it was clear I understood. So, I type in on my own phone’s Google Translate to reply that none had asked about the new anime but that they certainly were more than welcome to get up and ask during the panel.

A small back and forth starts between the two girls, as if trying to convince one or the other to go up and ask Seki-san about the new Saiyuki anime project. One of the girls is not able to convince her friend to ask, but rather convinces her to say something to me, so she’s tells me in English “I’m shy”, then both look at me with probably the same idea, heh heh. Not that I had any excuses to not ask since I’d gone up to mic before, but I felt that everyone should have a chance to ask Seki-san something and I’d already asked four questions by then (not even counting the Meet & Greet ones!). But well, as I like to say in these situations... “if we must we must.” Besides, it was true none had asked anything specifically about the Saiyuki anime and I was just as curious to know what Seki-san had to say about it. As we made our way towards the panel as the line moved, I started thinking how exactly to word my question. I had every intention now of lining up right away to the mic the moment Shiori called for it, and if this was the only question I got to ask in the panel, I had to make it count!

I’m glad I got thinking that way, because in contrast to the autograph session being less busy, the final Q & A was a full house! No sooner that Shiori ran through the house rules for one last time & called people to the mic, several members of the audience got up. Considering I was right at the front, I ended up being about 5th or 7th in line! The line itself this time was VERY LONG, so there was a high chance not everyone would get to ask a question and certainly no chances for lining up again, so yes, I had to make it count!

As agreed with my new friends, after ten minutes or so in line, my turn comes & I run the question in my mind one last time before turning to the mic. I turn to Seki-san and ask “If you’re allowed to share anything at all, what can you tell us about the upcoming ‘Saiyuki Reload Blast’ anime and/or what can we look forward to from it or from your role as Sanzo?”

As soon as he finished sharing his answer & Shiori jotting her notes, we learned that Seki-san as well as the other seiyuu did not even expect Saiyuki would even get another anime at this point in time— they were all very surprised. I quickly chimed into the mic “yes, even we as fans were all surprised” although I had always hoped this would happen sooner or later. Seki-san added that, at the same time, it makes him a little sad to think this will be the “end” of Saiyuki (Minekura has stated this is the final arc of the series), but like all things, everything has to have an end & has to come to an end. Nonetheless, his intention is to make the end a good one. In addition, Seki-san didn’t know (as of the time when I met him at AniRevo) what the anime project would be (TV anime or otherwise) but that he personally hopes it will be a movie.

Of course, by now we know from Saiyuki FESTA 2017’s announcements that the Reload Blast project will be a TV anime. Nonetheless, I was more than grateful to hear what he had to say about the upcoming anime. If anything, it increased my hopes for the series as a whole to be revitalized along with its fandom. Yet, there was ONE more thing I knew I had to say and what I felt was my mission all along and my one chance to get it accomplished.

I spoke up again, first, once again thanking Seki-san for all the hard work he’s put into this series and for sticking with it for so long. Next, came my final message:

“On behalf of the entire International Saiyuki Community, please tell Minekura-sensei for us that we are rooting for her, Hoshi-san, Hirata-san, Ishida-san & Seki-san and wish them the best— that even though Minekura-sensei’s health has been so bad, we will be with her & the Saiyuki boys until the very end of the journey.”

I might never find out if Minekura-sensei will ever get it, but I trust Seki-san will without a doubt let her know. My hope is that she’ll know she has so many international fans that support her all the way, even if we’re spread all over the world.

But if anything seems to signal that Seki-san will tell Minekura-sensei my message, it was that he seemed really impressed with my statement once Shiori translated it to him. Before I realized it, I was hearing Seki-san speak as Sanzo one last time...

“ARE YOU READY, BASTARDS?!” our “Sanzo” spoke out loud and clear. I am ready. No: We’ve been ready for this for a long time.

I made a small bow as the audience clapped for Seki-san and walk over to my seat. That felt like a wonderful parting gift if I can call it that. I came in to the first panel thinking at most I’d get to hear Seki-san only say ONE line as Sanzo. Turns out, I was beyond spoiled.

And so many others went by until time ran out and only one more question could be asked. But before said last question, Seki-san first begins saying he never knows what’s going to happen on these fan panels because heck—we even made him sing the previous day! Just as the last question is about to be asked, he suddenly shouts “NOI’MNOTGONNASINGAGAIN!!” Shiori translates and everyone in the audience bursts out laughing.

I don’t recall the exact last question but I believe it was Gundam related. But it was more painful to realize it was now over. Shiori gave the go for Seki-san to share his last few words. Seki-san thanks everyone for coming and says he has really enjoyed himself these past three days and that he’d now also be rooting for the Canadian Olympic team as he really had a great time in Canada (the Olympics were currently taking place at that time). Shiori then calls the panel to a close and everyone claps as she and Seki-san leave the stage. Several of us wave at him (myself included) wishing him farewell and a safe trip back to Japan. So many mixed emotions between happiness & sadness. My dream had come true. After so many years, it finally came true.

Once Shiori & Seki-san went behind the enclosed area out of sight from the rest, me & Tara walk up to each other, hug and say goodbye to each other wishing safe travels. Next I turn to my two Japanese friends. I give them the “thumbs up” –mission accomplished. They both come up to me and give me a hug!! I was just too happy and elated ,I asked them for a fangirl group hug. I think the moment of Saiyuki fandom love was going all around for so many of us.

We were ushered out of the room as it had to be readied for next panel, so me and the girls step outside to an open corner. Then, my friends started showing me pictures from Seki-san’s different performances in stage plays. I commented in one of them he really really looked like an old man (lol, I did actually say “jii-san” hah hah). I really wish I would have been able to say something more, but still we were able to communicate and exchanged twitter accounts and followed each other. They asked if I was going to the closing ceremony but I explained I had to go and get ready for my return home. We hugged again and I waved goodbye as I walked out of the convention center.

Lesson learned: When it comes to things you love, not even language barriers will stop fangirls from helping and reaching out to each other, especially us Saiyuki fans. Having learned that makes me really happy.

As I thought about that while walking down the boardwalk away from the convention center, I happen to run into Shiori. I stopped to thank her for all her wonderful translations and interpreting, asking for her name so I could remember her. We shook hands and I thanked her again for all her incredible work interpreting for Seki-san.

The Victory Round: All Three Autographed CDs

What a weekend that had been. All the feels settled in back at the hotel, at the end of the journey. I felt so happy because I got to meet Seki-san but so sad I already had to say good bye to him. But what’s a lifetime experience if you don’t get all the feels and write about it, right? Writing all of this has taken such a ridiculous amount of time, but I wouldn’t have had it any other way. It gives me a chance to travel back and when I think it all seemed so surreal or wonder if it was all a dream, I know it wasn’t: it did happen.

~*~

Closing Remarks

Bringing back Seki-san’s pic…because he IS SANZO.

The road was long & so was the delay writing this, but from the bottom of my heart, to anyone reading this, if you read through every one of my posts, really, a big THANK YOU. I know it was a ton to read, but thank you for taking the time to read through this and for letting me share with you my experience of making one of my biggest dreams & fangirl moments of my life come true. Truly, I am grateful.

#Saiyuki #Toshihiko Seki #flowermiko meets seki-san #flowermiko anirevo #Genjyo Sanzo #Seki Toshihiko

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ralphlayton · 4 years ago

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360i #SideHustle: Kyzr Blue with Michael LaVallee

Welcome to the 360i #SideHustle series, where we showcase the awesome side projects, hobbies, start-up businesses, and other ventures created by the entrepreneurial employees here at 360i.

At 360i, many of us know Michael LaVallee as an Associate Strategist – but what many of us may not know is he is also a producer, writer, and singer for his own solo music project, Kyzr Blue. He makes “music that’s blue, but something to dance to” with emotional lyrics told through a dreamy-electronica production style. And he just released a new single called “Time Between the Cuts,” out on major platforms – Spotify, iTunes, tidal, and more! Notable music blog, Culture Fix, calls him a “truly exciting rising talent in the pop music.”

Learn more about Michael’s journey below and his great advice to budding artists and all creative people.

How did your passion for music begin?

Music has always been a major part of my life. I grew up playing the upright string bass in orchestra, singing in acapella groups, doing musicals, etc. while after school I was listening to and watching MTV and VH1 music videos and collecting CDs. I always loved making CD’s for my friends with my own personally curated playlists, and I still make weekly Spotify playlists for fun playing around with song transitions and adding new artists I find.

Who/What influenced you to start producing/writing/singing music?

For college, I studied theater at an art school here in Chicago, IL. I moved here from Tennessee with a big flashy plan to be a television/movie actor – cliché, right? Throughout my 4 years at college, I didn’t just learn how to be an actor, but I learned what being an artist really meant to me. After graduating, my acting dreams didn’t seem right, so I took a couple months backpacking alone through Europe and realized that my dream of being a movie star wasn’t what I really wanted – I wanted to create and tell my story. My training in theater developed a core part of who I am and what I want to say, but my journey as an actor was ultimately going to be interpreting another person’s script. I wanted to be that person too. I wanted to do it all – write and perform my own real and raw points of view. So, I turned to music because it’s natural to me – I’ve always been a singer and my writing can always improve, but the big problem I had was that I didn’t know how to produce. So, when I came back from Europe, I made a plan: teach myself how to produce, write like crazy, and just create. I feel like as an artist, you just have to start creating because if you don’t put something down on paper, you won’t have any sort of starting line. A finished idea is never perfect in one try.

What themes do you touch on in your music?

Most of my writing is fairly somber and emotional. I tend to write about tensions in relationships, love, confidence, self-worth, and that sort. Gross, I know – it sounds very emo. But my genre influences span a wide range of house, pop, folk, and experimental. As an artist, your POV and your voice is always going to change. Right now, mine comes from a place of vulnerability. I write vulnerable lyrics told through natural, progressive beats and soft, layered vocals so it’s kind of a “vulnerability is strength,” message not just through the lyrics, but through the entire song as one piece of art.

How much time would you say you spend on Kyzr Blue every week?

I started Kyzr Blue in 2016, and since then I would say I average 5 – 10 hours per week. It’s a difficult balance – work, social life, music, self-care – that I go in circles with because I’m really hard on myself for not putting more hours into Kyzr Blue; however, my artist process usually comes in spurts and I try to start creating once I feel a natural inspiration. Usually I can work pretty quickly in that zone, especially as I get better and better in production. My first single took about 8 months to produce and my second took about 6 months so as I continue to learn the logistics, my process will become tighter.

What is your favorite part of the process?

My favorite part of the process is learning. In the three years I’ve been doing this, I have so many random songs I’ve started and never finished or finished but wanted to come back to because it doesn’t feel right. I’m now able to go back to old song mixes from 2016 or 2017 and almost re-produce it in a matter of hours to make it sound like what I actually wanted it to. It’s hilarious seeing how horribly I produced my first couple songs, but it’s also validating to see that I truly am getting much better over time.

What are you most proud of?

That I’m doing all of this myself. It’s hard to step away, pat myself on the back, and say “Wow, I’m really doing this by myself,” because I’m so in the weeds of editing and failing and changing songs that I forget I’m doing everything. I’m writing, producing, mastering, photographing myself, posting on social, reaching out to blogs, all of it. Many artists rely on others for certain aspects of their work which is absolutely fine, but I haven’t quite built a network in music and I want to be the only input in how I run the project. I do collaborate outside of music though, especially in photography and modeling!

Does your role at 360i influence your music producing, or vice versa?

I think it’s less influence on one another and more the similarities between the two. As a strategist, it’s extremely helpful to have a creative mind, but my brain also works very logistically in terms of breaking an idea or tension or problem down to its roots. For music and producing, it’s that same mental process where I have a lyric idea or sound in my head and then I have to break it apart in terms of a beat, bass, synths, verses, chorus, melody, etc.

What truly motivates you to continue your work with music?

Creating. The notes section in my phone is seriously made up of hundreds of random one-liner lyrics and even full songs I’ve written on the train to work one morning that have to see light of day! I wouldn’t feel whole if I didn’t finish any of them.

Do you have any quick tips or pieces of advice for someone looking to break into this area?

Start somewhere and be patient. You’re never going to feel like an expert and you’re always going to feel like you wish you knew more or could do more as an artist but start somewhere and be patient with yourself. The music industry and being a music artist comes with so many learning curves, but that’s also half the fun!

Where do you see this project going in the future?

Ha! Great question. Right now, it’s one step at a time – I’m focusing on finishing my first EP this year. After that I would love to figure out how to play live, in-person shows if/when that becomes possible again.

Where can your friends at 360i listen to your music?

I’m on all the major streaming platforms – Spotify is my main, and follow my Instagram for all updates and content!

The post 360i #SideHustle: Kyzr Blue with Michael LaVallee appeared first on 360i Digital Agency Blog.

360i #SideHustle: Kyzr Blue with Michael LaVallee published first on yhttps://improfitninja.blogspot.com/

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templified · 5 years ago

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Best WordPress Theme for Bloggers and Writers | Templified

New Post has been published on https://templified.com/best-wordpress-theme-for-bloggers-and-writers/

Best WordPress Theme for Bloggers and Writers

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