#ugh human connections suck

[yongseungkim]

.

[manasurge]

bleh

[queen-morgana91]

"Why do people dislike Zuko/Zutara stans??"

Mmmh

🤦‍♂️

Sorry but I can't stay silent anymore, these posts are insane

Aang: a kid/genocide survivor lashing out because his best friend and only living link to his people has been stolen. The avatar state (a power he is afraid of) was a response to losing another part of his home, the only person connecting him to his past and eradicated culture

Katara: saw Aang loosing control in the avatar state and CHOSE to be at his side and help him, because she KNOW what's it's like having your loved ones stolen from you, she is hurt from seeing him hurting because she's an empathetic person and she loves him. She's comforting a friend during an emotional crisis.

Zutara/Zuko's stans: Ugh violent destructive tantrums save yourself katara! Zuko <3

Mh ok.

It's funny because those people are stanning a character who called Katara a peasant and threatened to wipe her village and only were in good terms in the last few episodes. They are stanning a character who was a villain/antagonist for two seasons (and half of season 3) who tried to kill her and her friends over and over again. But that's ok, he suffered and redeemed himself in the last 3 episodes, so it doesn't matter, while everything the abuser/toxic Aang """did""" was beyond forgiveness.

That's the message of Avatar the Last Airbender :)

The way people in this fandom are so unempathetic towards a 12 year old who lost everything is so crazy to me.

These episodes are full of sad moments with a lot of hurt behind it. These are all children (child soldiers also) overwhelmed by moments of severe loss. These children are human and they have flaws.

This is why being a fan of most animated content sucks as their fanbases have the intellectual capacity of a goldfish

[impactrueno]

I think I rambled about this in a previous ask but my personal pet theory is that he started "life" as an actual demon (Betelgeuse being the name of a star, stars often being symbolically connected with angels, demons often being fallen angels etc) but at some point incarnated into human form and died. I also have suspicions that he's found like a million loopholes in the Afterlife Law over the years to come back to life multiple times, so that the time we saw him alive in the Italian flashback wasn't even his first lifetime. If this is the case, Delores might have been specifically seeking him out, as his soul would be uniquely powerful (and uniquely fucked up) from all the living and dying he's done

Also I like to think that if she *actually* soul sucked him, she wouldn't be able to contain him and would just explode lmao

this is a pretty cool theory, especially because it's much easier to believe that an entity like that would be named Betelgeuse and not some random graverobber in medieval italy LMAO

i don't know how much of it was intentional (probably more than we think) but i love all the little connections to demons and fallen angels ugh that's 100% my jam right there. i've seen people complain that he was referred to as a demon in the sequel (by lydia so it doesn't mean he actually is one) but i'm just like hell fucking yeah he is

besides when you think about it, if one subscribes to the demon theory he wouldn't feel too out of place in the goetia... 🤔

sidenote but you know how the name Betelgeuse comes from arabic right...but it's actually an error. the original name Yad al-Jawzā when translated to a european name got the Y replaced by a B by mistake. you know who else has a misspelled name? delores. IT'S DOLORES PLEASE IT HURTS TO TYPE DELORES EVERY TIME AS A NATIVE SPANISH SPEAKER

sorry i got sidetracked but yes i love thinking of him as a demon of some sort as well lol

[threepandas]

The Vod's List: Yandere Clones

The Galaxy changes, thanks to spit.

It's not even the first time it's happened, in my peoples history. But it's... kinda weird it happend? Twice? The FIRST time we actually PLANNED for it to happen. It was biological warfare. But this? This was just an accident. One that could have KILLED somebody.

Cause, see, the Techganic people? Are... well to put it lightly, we are the result of centuries of an ideological and spiritual holy war, that nearly tore our plant apart. The two sides don't really "talk" to each other any more. Or... you know... ACKNOWLEDGE the other.

They are waiting for the other to "inevitably die off, due to their own hubris".

Yeeeeeah. Fun times. You can see why I wanted OFF that dirtball.

At least on other planets? The politics aren't PERSONAL... is what I naively thought. Forgot about empathy! You know, like an idiot! Kark. Where was I? Right! Galaxy, changed, spit. Okay, sooo... here's the thing? My family was part of the bloody bone-sucking Holy Naturalist Empire. (Translated to Basic, the word "Naturalist" has more of a specific to the body? Meaning? Not so much "nature of the world" as "nature of the Self" you know? And in THIS case, the word they are using for "holy" in ancient means less strictly "divine" and more "pure like the divine"? It's Complicated.)

And the Progress Collective was ORIGINALLY this whole project, supposedly, that got WAY out of hand, became a cult, then a religion, and tore the planet apart? It was a technological hive mind that want to "perfect" the planet to a "higher state of being". And then extend its reachs to the stars.

We held the karking LINE. Died in legions. Refusing to give our bodies to be made machines. Droids and puppets. Refused to give our freedoms, our homes, our planet. Any of it. But it was at the cost of our original bodies. The only way to truely fight BACK? Was to become... poison.

The Jedi who eventually came, some how FEELING our distress, dispite the blockade the Collective created on the interplanetary transmitters? Our planet's holonet connection? Said that the creator of Our Salvation was guided by the Force. None of us could really argue. The Salvation treatment was madness. A machine so ahead of it's time, we STILL aren't sure how it works, just that it DOES.

We had a choice.

It was no choice at all.

And now? NOW? Kriffing CENTURIES later? I am STILL a biological weapon! Not do much to non-human adjacent races, but anyone human or human modified? Human descended? Kriff, even a few humanoids! If they're CLOSE enough!

I have to take neutralizers if I plan to be swapping any sort of bodily fluids with ANY race that isn't on the "verified Safe" list. For MONTHS. So it can build up in my system properly. And the side effects? Ugh. Stars and Bone, is it AWFUL! Like I GET why people do it. You love who you love. But the nausea! All those meds just to counter the side effects of other side effects!

It made me kinda glad to be single. Stars, poor cousin Tango.

Of course, I AM responsible. I always carry a FULL kit of emergency neutralizers with me. Just in case, Bones and Blood forbid it, the worst should occur. I have some for accidental blood mixing, some for plasma, a couple for bile, and the majority of the rest? Saliva. The most common accident reported. My kit even has an emergency medical guide on a lil piece of flimsy, on the inside lid!

...I feel like I'm getting distracted agai- OH! Right!!

I work in the senate building, now! Astral, right?! Center of the GALAXY! First step to making a DIFFERENCE! Granted, I am basicly the assistant nobody of no one... but STILL! It's a start! I'm ON Coruscant! That's more then most people can say! I go to work passing THE jedi temple each day! You can see them coming and going from your airspeeder!

Unfortunately? Rent is BRUTAL. I live in a glorified closet with barely a bunk and a sonic shower to my name. Not even a proper 'fresher! It's not like we're traveling. Or my species needs to avoid water! No, I literally just CAN'T AFFORD IT! And if you saw the prices? Droids be carting you off to the medcenter before you know it! Where do they GET their water? The outer rim?! Do they deliver it by HAND?!

.....I haven't had my Caf. Ignore me. I just miss feeling proper CLEAN. Sonic showers just... I know it's a psychological thing, but it doesn't FEEL as clean, you know? I am pouting. Pouty me. Unhappy.

Wait... what time is i- OH KARK!!!

See, on Coruscant there is no real "beating" the traffic. But there ARE certain steps you can take to cut travel time. Like making sure you're on the Senatorial speeder. It has right of way and is pretty comfy. And? If I get ON it early enough? Blend in with the walls? I not only can't get kicked off by some plasbone slimeball of a "I think I'm better then you" senator's aid... but they'll run their mouths!

I have learned SO MUCH that way~!

Unfortunately for me? The Caf merchant was REALLY popular today. So dignified I am NOT.

"Hold the 'LIFT!"

It more a desperate plea then an order, but two seperate armored hands immediately reach out and stop the turbolift's doors from closing. Out of breath behind my Goverments mandated mouth gaurd, I struggle to catch my breath as I finally make it. The kriffing thing makes running almost impossible. It makes most things karking near impossible.

"Tha... thank! You!" I manage to pant, trying not to double over. I am a bit light headed. It's hard to remember what I'm supposed to do when I'm like this. "Kriff! I hate running. Can.. never breathe! Afterwards!"

The lift is full of Coruscant gaurds, their mysterious gazes presumably locked onto me. I could only assume, given how their helmets were turned towards me, but ultimately it was impossible to tell. The gaurd standing next to me was more heavily painted then the others. I still couldn't for the life of me figure out what the marks MEANT. Rank maybe?

"Should we be requesting a medical droid?" Came the mechanized voice of... I was fairly sure the one to my left? I turned to address the one I was preeeeetty sure had spoken. It was a small, echo-y lift.

"No, no. It's just the mask. Makes it kinda hard to breathe. Gover-"

I never got to finish explaining. Just as we reach the Speeder platform. As the doors began to open. An explosion ripped the world apart. The very mask I disliked so much, likely saving my lower jaw from being ripped completely off. The turbolift slammed back, crashing, durasteel screeching as supports ripped apart and gave way.

Rapid fire, more explosions. The Gaurd next to me grabbed me, tucked me tight as they braced. Away from the exit. As.. the world... slowly LEANED.

All I could do was stare, terrified, down at the sheer drop of the now frantic Coruscant traffic below. Commuters desperately trying to avoid falling debris. I could hear alarms. The transparasteel below my face cracked.

Wait.

Below?

The 'lift had leaned. MORE then leaned. It was half unmoored. Hanging out into open air. I clung to the gaurd that held me, my caf dropped long ago, now seeping like dark blood through the cracks to drip... drip... drip... out into that terrible drop.

I.. I couldn't breath. My heart was pounding. Too fast. Too hard. Oh Stars that take us in the End, oh Bones and Blood, that we are! C-can't BREATHE! I managed to make a hand unseize. Rip the glorified muzzle from my face, so I could suck in air. I was drooling. Like a mad hunt beast. A panic response, I remembered distantly.

So far down. Oh Stars. We were going to fall so far down!

A creak. A snap. We jerked and swung downwards. I think... I think I sobbed. Pressed as tight as I could make myself to the red heavy gaurd. He was sturdy. Hold strong. I could hear the other gaurds working quickly and in tandem behind me. But... but I was frozen. Useless. N..nothing but dead weight.

I must have started babbling. Apologizing. Because the helmet near my head turned slightly, the arm around my waist tightened just a bit.

"You have nothing to apologize for ma'am. We were trained for this. Made for this. Not you. You're going to be just fine, all right? We'll get you out of here. Just stay calm and try not to move."

We are almost out. Almost free. When the next attack hits. The cheap duracrete crumbles and we DROP. Gravity releasing us for a few, brief, and terrifying moments.

I do not face them with dignity. I am terrified. A fractured, strangled, scream trying to rip its way free of me. Fear too great to let it. Some stars blessed 'Lift cord catches, arresting our fall violently. We slam into the side of the building the Senatorial Speeder pad is on. Throwing gaurds around the lift pod. Smashing us all together.

The man holding me has his helmet knocked off in a violent bounce that leaves his jaw sporting a shallow but painful looking scrape from someone's boot. Two panes of the transparensteel are just... GONE. Howling wind a deadly reminder of what waits below, should anyone fall through those holes.

"Hammer, Tricks! Get those doors open NOW! I don't care if you have to BLAST them open! We are running out of time and I'd prefer not to learn what the low levels taste like at SPEED." Growled a commanding voice in my ear. Then the voice turn reassuring. "We got you. You're not dying here. We're getting out, okay? Just hold on."

I managed to nod. Drool had long ago overwhelmed my mouth, now painting my chin, smearing everywhere. A mess. It mixed with my tears and some part of me was screaming. Dangerous, dangerous! But... but all I could see was that DROP. Gonna fall. Oh Stars, gonna fall! Please. Scared. Don't let go!

I pressed closer. Ignorant of the way my drool wet cheek pressed against the still bleeding wound on his his face. Ignorant of how I was doing the ONE THING I had been warned time and time again to NEVER EVER do.

The turbolift door gave a screeching clunk as they were force out of place. Toppling away. The gaurds ignored it, immediately getting into action. There was a patrol speeder clearly waiting to get into position. One by one the jumped into it. Careful not to destabilize the already precarious lift any further.

Finally it was our turn. And? With a gut turning drop as I was carried down? We were safe. The Speeder immediately making room. I cried. Clung. It took me entirely too long to remember that something might be amiss. It was only when the gaurd I was clinging to stumbled. Admitted to a "bit" of a headache. That everything came crashing back.

Like ice water to the soul.

Oh Stars! What have I DONE!?

I scramble for my neutralizers. The full anti-spectrum kit. Oh Stars! It's in his BLOOD! I stared in horror at the damning sheen of my own spit against his cheek, my hands shaking, trying to rip open the pack. A medic takes it from me. Opens it for me and reads the flimsy guide in side. Curses.

There is no way to REALLY know who was exposed to me. So everyone has to go to the medcenter. Immediately. Get emergency shots just in case. Then follow up with medical droids for a couple weeks afterwards. BARE MINIMUM.

Why? Because my spit carries organic nanites. They hunt and DESTROY anything they deem "non-native" to the body... as defined by MY species. They ignore obviously alien races but human adjacent ones? They were DESIGNED to destroy augmented humans. "Purge" them of their enhancements. They can't tell they difference. Alien humanoid? Augmented Techganic? Same thing, right?!

Without the neutralizers? The nanites will RIP PEOPLES BODIES APART. And even WITH them? All it does is soft reset them to whatever current race their in. They still cause massive problems and medical trauma as they go about "fixing" any perceived damaged. Like, you know, medical devices. Or shrapnel.

They are meant to break and cannibalize what they can. Fix indiscriminately. If it causes YOU unimaginable agony? So be it. At least you will be "whole". Die Technoganic. Pure. The pain has KILLED people. The nanites? Dumb enough to attack VITAL STSTEMS they deem "wrong". Killing their hosts before they themselves can FIX anything. They were a WEAPON. And... and I infected an innocent man.

I am a monster.

All I can do, is apologize. Again and again and again. Stare in horror, into the eyes of the man who SAVED me, and know that I returned the favor by poisoning him horribly. If there was room? I would grovel. This is... this is unforgivable.

He grimaced past the building headache. Pats my shoulder.

The worst part is... is no one is blaming me.

T-they SHOULD be...

The hand on my shoulder spasms, grip turning crushing as my savior's body violently seizes. His hands shoot to his head, limbs twitching and lashing. Blood trickles from his nose. Eyes shut tight against some terrible pain. They've GIVEN him the shot! It should be countering the nanites! The only reason he should be in this much pain would be if there was something lodged in his brain!

All at once... like a doll with his string cut... he relaxes. Just in time for us to arrive at the Medcenter. They try to usher me away from the gaurds. Push them off towards some "take care of it yourself" corner of nowhere.

I throw a FIT. Loudly.

I am prepared to sit on the floor and scream and cry like a youngling, and it must SHOW, because they hurriedly rush us along. People GET their kriffing bacta. Their technoganic poisoning shots. Yes, I had to harrass the nurses it digging the shots out of storage. NO it couldn't KARKING WAIT!

I learned my saviors name was "Fox". That he's actually stationed in the same building as where I work. The Senate.

Thankfully? "I got BOMBED" is a valid excuse not to show up to work. I was allowed to head home. Fox even escorted me. Showed me where the Gaurds all get their off duty meals. Pretty spicy! But good! I don't really notice how clear headed Fox seems. Surely he always was, right? I can't have CHANGED anything, right?

I don't notice him bracing for headaches that never come. Having thoughts that don't slip away. Seeing the world and for once... REALLY seeing it. Being about to trace all the changes back to one person. The smiling, laughing, soul who NEEDED him so much.

He...he was MADE to be needed. To serve and protect. But does everyone DESERVE his service?

Huh... a strange new thought, that one.

But THIS one... this one might make The List. He really hopes she does. Nodding to a passing vod, his eyes drift back to her. She was warm. Stands as a rare bit of bright in Coruscant's filthy everything. He'd... He'd really like to keep her. Feels too soon, but it's true.

Everyone else have their generals. What do the Gaurds have?

Maybe this? Might be nice.

He hopes she makes the List.

[tgrailwar-zero]

Guys, is it really difficult to just say we like her as a friend?

To be fair, we’re divided on a good day, but most of us like you? You’re funny, you’re smart, and you’re definitely strong—but there’s lot of super strong people out there too. We like you cause we had great times together, and we even saved the world(?) …in that time that didn’t actually happen(??) and…

… we just want our friend to be okay and happy and the good times to continue…?

Never mind, being emotionally vulnerable sucks. Pretend we said nothing.

BLACKSMITH: "…What're you makin' that annoyin' face for?"

BENNOSUKE(?): "Hehehe… hehehehehe… Did'ya hear that? They wuuuuuuv me! I'm gonna tell eeeeeeverybody! They're gonna be sooooo jealous!"

You're kidding.

There she is.

BLACKSMITH: "Excuse me? They said a lot of things, but I don't think that was one of 'em. Did you hit your head again when I wasn't lookin'? What the hell is 'wuv'?"

MUSASHI: "It's called subtext, old man. Maybe they didn't invent it in your time? Still, gosh, it's about time. I was starting to get a bit discouraged."

MUSASHI stretched, before looking over at you and nodding. The BLACKSMITH frowned, folding his arms.

BLACKSMITH: "That look in your eyes, you've reached some sorta conclusion. I guess that means you're leavin'… well, if that's what'll make you happy, I ain't gonna stop you."

The Blacksmith said... ugh, remaining still, not going back on his word.

MUSASHI: "Mm. Thank you though, for giving me a home for a bit."

The children ran up to her, tugging on her kimono.

GRANDDAUGHTER: "But you can't leave! Not yet! We'll miss you!"

You saw her smile grow soft as she knelt down, pulling the kids into a hug.

MUSASHI: "Trust me, I feel the same. I'll miss you too. Take care of your grandpa, okay?"

She hopped up to her feet, turning back to you.

MUSASHI: "I don't think so, though it's not like I've really had much of one. But... living in this Shimousa, with old man Muramasa, Onui, and Tasuke… it's a pretty lie. One that if I wasn't careful about, could live in for a really long time without realizing something was wrong. That Pretender really is a devious one."

She turned away slightly, clearing her throat as she caught her breath.

MUSASHI: "…This was the place where the human 'Miyamoto Musashi' died, and the Heroic Spirit 'Miyamoto Musashi' was born."

BLACKSMITH: "Bennosuke…"

MUSASHI: "I know. I'll take care of myself. But that means you've got to take care of yourself too, next time we meet for real, I'll be bugging you for a new sword."

BLACKSMITH: "…See you."

MUSASHI: "See you."

She readied her katanas.

MUSASHI: "Some privacy, please? I'll pull through, don't worry. I always do. But that Jaguar wants us to put on a show, right?"

She winked, flashing a roguishly charming smile. It was bewitching enough that you only just caught the upswing of her blade. The strike was swift, sudden, and perfectly painless as it neatly severed your connection to MUSASHI's dreamscape.

…As expected of a sword saint.

You found yourselves back in the room with JAGUAR MAN, who was violently shaking you as your Servants continued to yell. It was a lot of noise at once. Was this what they heard every time you got panicked? You looked back at the screen, seeing MUSASHI still asleep.

The ninth chime sounded.

PRETENDER stood over MUSASHI, still as confident as he was when you last saw him. Which... was actually a few seconds ago. Dream-time was strange.

PRETENDER: "It's but a shame, but this is where the story ends. I repeat that I only did this because you were my most formidable opponent, may you have sweet--"

Before he could finish, he was suddenly cut off.

PRETENDER: "…?!"

Two hands shot up, grabbing him by the side of the face and yanking him downwards. The entire arena was treated to a wide shot of the previously asleep samurai having yanked the prince into a kiss- on the forehead at least. This was followed by a rather brutal headbutt as MUSASHI slammed her forehead against his, the PRETENDER letting out a pained yell as he stumbled backwards, reeling from the dirty strike. The samurai spoke up, her voice loud and clear for the observing parties as she hopped up to her feet.

MUSASHI: "And thus, the lovely princess was awakened by true love's kiss! Oh, Jeran, you dirty dog! What will your fans think? Stealing a kiss from a maiden like myself? The scandal of it all!"

Before the PRETENDER could comment, the swordswoman thrust the pommel of her sword into his nose and kicked him square in the chest, knocking him into a nearby wall.

He crashed into it, slumping down as MUSASHI stretched, yawning dramatically.

MUSASHI: "Aaaawaa… man, I needed that! Hm? Why's the air so tense? Did I miss something big?"

SALIERI: "That woman…"

NERO: "She's truly devilish…"

CONSTANTINE: "Making us worry like that…"

KUKULKAN: "That's our Saber!"

You heard the PRIEST's voice echo over the footage.

PRIEST: "And… at the last moment before the tenth count, the Null Zero Samurai awakens!"

The arena burst into wild, chaotic cheers.

[localcatmutt]

WELCOME TO MY TED TALK

Today's topic; hate on common identities 🦂

If you discourage or put down therians with common theriotypes, you aren't helping us build and maintain a good community. Even if its indirect like "i love NON-canine/feline therians" or "ugh everyone is a wolf/cat", its unkind. I get that most people don't realize their words can hurt, but they do.

Nobody chooses their theriotype. Common or uncommon. There isnt one that is cooler or better than the others. Quit praising uncommon theriotypes and putting down common ones. Who cares if its unrealistic. There is way more psychological factors in play when it comes to common identities anyways... imprinting on house pets, being exposed to movies or books about wolves, even spiritual factors based on cultures such as north american indigenous cultures that have deep connections to animals. More likely to be an animal that is significant to humans than those who arnt. Thats just how it is.

I get it might be frustrating when someone wants to connect to others but cant find someone with the same uncommon theriotype. But ill let you in on a secret... we may not have the same shifts, but animals have many things in common. Zebras (uncommon) and deers (common) are different animals, but theyre both herbivores with hooves. Wolves (common) and orcas (uncommon) are both pack animals that eat other animals. There may be major differences, but we all have SOMETHING in common. No matter how different our identities are.

I'm not butt-hurt by these kinds of comments. I could care less. Im just speaking for others who are more insecure or anxious than I am. All i want is to see a community. That means, people supporting eachother, helping eachother and looking out for eachother.

Im also sick of unnecessary comments like these. And then other people share it like "yeeeaaa common theriotypes suck!".

Hiss hiss (translation : kindly shut up).

(^з^)-♡♡♡

[daiseukiis]

╰ ⋆ ❝ 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓'𝐒 𝐌𝐘 𝐁𝐄𝐒𝐓 𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃 ! ❞ ଓ.° ╮

FEAT. ⠀⠀⠀⠀ mikage reo

CONTENTS. fem!reader x mikage reo, profanity, mutual pinning, best friends to lovers, frustrating slow burn boo

SUMMARY. you and mikage reo go way back, since second year of jr high. yet who knew you'd fall for your one and only best friend.

W/C. 15.2k

A/N. good fuckin' tangina this is done. i didn't even expect it to take this damn long. here's to the ( possibily ) longest mikage reo oneshot in ur lives bc damn imma sleep now. im too tired to proofread u gais r on ur own omg. @17020 @adorlings @lov3nagi uhh who else ugh whatever goodnight at 6:30am

⠀⠀⠀⠀ “you’re pretty good.” the bustling sound of ‘high score!’ rings through your ears along with the sounds of loud gaming machines with the occasional ‘k.o!’ from a fighting game. your hues look directly at the ball which swishes through the net and the record of the machine changing from the bright led light of 48 to 62. the ball spins in your hand momentarily as you throw it once more despite the timer already ticking to zero— just for fun. “thanks, i’m actually on the basketball team.”

“no wonder, you beat the record.” periwinkle strands matching with his eyes look at the score you hit before directing his eyes to where yours was. the boy smiles, one which you easily reciprocate as you point at the blinking number 60 on his side of the basketball game. “you did pretty good yourself, you also beat the record on your machine.”

“what can i say?” the young boy shrugs his shoulders, making you chuckle at his easy going attitude— he surely did interest you lots. you pick up your school bag and blazer you had thrown to the ground upon arriving at your game, quickly putting on your belongings as you notice him also grab hold of his school bag, one which you recognize to also be in jr high.

“you’re cool, i’m yn.” you outstretch your hand to him with a smile. he takes your hand, showing you a smile of his own that made you want to melt on the spot. the sound of his voice brings you quickly back to reality, “i’m mikage reo.”

the more you soak in the features of this boy the more something in you just wanted to tell you to stay, even the warmth of reo’s hand was like calming a sea of uneasiness. there was something in his violet diamonds that allured you like a moth to a fire. but you knew you had no luxury to find the truth so easily.

“hate to be rude, but you’re kinda screaming rich boy.” you wanted to distract yourself from this bubbling interest, quickly pulling your hand away that had seemed to hold on for a bit too long on to his. your smile wavers slightly though not noticeable to the human eye. with a lighthearted joke, you continue your conversation with him. “and your name sounds like the—” 

“heir to the mikage corporation? yeah, that’s me.” your jaw almost drops at his response, staring at his handsome stature. you blink your lashes a couple of times, letting the new information click in until it finally processes properly. your gasp surprises reo, raising a brow at your sudden change of attitude once he revealed the truth about his background. “no way, you’re a rich boy and pretty boy?”

“i guess so? thanks, you’re pretty too.” reo didn’t know how to reply back to your words, in fact he found you odd. usually at this point, maybe people would suck up to him for connections, yet you didn’t. “you’re flattering, really.” you were… refreshing to him. the boy grins, changing his confusion that that of a more comfortable look. “let’s keep in touch, yeah?”

the way your eyes lit up at his question made him internally chuckle, he had to admit it, you’re cute. “i’d love to!” reo goes and reaches for his pocket, taking out his phone to gesture to you to exchange contacts. “do you have line?” 

you look slightly bewildered at his actions, staring at the line home screen to add contacts. “uhm, email or number works, is that okay?” you nervously look through your bag, lifting up your rather outdated flip phone at him. “i know, i really need a new phone but it’s a hand me down. hope you don’t mind.”

“i can get you a new one.” reo says so instantaneously that it catches you off guard. you blink your pretty lashes at the look of his raised brow, waiting for the answer. shock is instantly running through you as your face scrunches up, “what?”

“i’m serious, you’re my friend now and you seem like you’re struggling with that.” to say you were speechless was an understatement, he couldn’t be serious, right? though the look on his face is unwavering you start to think— he’s serious. “hold on! i appreciate the offer but that’s too much, seriously.” 

“here,” you quickly grab hold of his phone, quickly typing in your contact information to his number. you lift the device, creating a peace sign with your free hand as you click the button to create a contact photo for yourself. as you finish it up, you hand the phone back to reo before spinning on your heels out of the arcade. “text me later, alright? let’s meet up again, mikage! i gotta head to work!”

reo watches as your figure disappears from his view. he can’t help but smile to himself at your rather honest and odd antics, he was going to lie to himself that he tried to test you earlier if you were just going to use him for his money; and you didn’t disappoint. this encounter would forever be burned into his mind, for better or for worse.

⠀⠀⠀⠀ “she’s pretty, think i could get her number?” a male classmate say out to his group mates, the female of the group letting out a small chuckle at him. “pfft, i thought you’d want a girl with more class?” the boy sends her a smirk, shrugging his shoulders. “hey, maybe she’ll let me be her sugar daddy? i got the money for it.”

‘what assholes.’ it’s not like reo didn’t want to be there, it was more or so he had no choice but to be with the other three students from his class. what did he expect though? he knew that they only chose him for his relations and connections, and for the fact that it wasn’t going to be the last instance like this to happen.

“oh, here she comes!” one of the other guys smacks their friend by the forearm, slightly pointing a finger towards the waiter discreetly. everyone but reo was whisper yelling their cheers to the male who had gotten his words ready in his mind to say. “get ready.”

“here are your orders—” this voice. immediately the boy turns his head to the side, eyes going into contact with your jewels. “yn?” there was a small pause in the air, your hand had reached out to place a drink down on the table. you felt a part of your locks drop from your shoulders due to the angle of you hovering over. “mikage?”

“you work here?” reo being surprised at your appearance was an understatement, and you seeing reo at the cafe you worked part-time at was also a pleasant discovery for you. after placing down the rest of the orders the table had gotten you prompted yourself up to a more relaxed position upright, a hand pushing back the lock of hair which fell earlier. “yeah, surprise to see you here!”

“that’s why you’re always so busy.” he jokes, jabbing at you since you did tell him that you had other plans and bailed out on him last week due to a sudden work shift. you can’t help but smile at him. “work and basketball, i’m a busy body myself.”

“clearly. just take rests too.” reo scoffs at you, knowing full well that your life revolved working shifts like a dog and playing ball after school with little to no social life left for you. rolling your eyes you can’t help but scoff back at his slightly nagging nature. “yeah, yeah, i heard you, mikage.” waving a hand out, you dismiss what he says. “anyways, i’ll be right back. i’ll bring that latte over for you.”

“yeah, go ahead.” without another word you nod your head at the other three, walking away from their table to go back to the front counter. just as you were out of ear shot all eyes direct themselves to reo with questions flying out their mouths. “yo! you know her?”

“we met at the arcade playing on the basketball machine.” one of the guys wraps an around reo’s shoulders as he grins at him. “cool, she plays sports too huh.” interested, the female soon asks her question as well; all surprised to see reo know the same girl their classmate was after. “what school does she go to?”

“i remember her telling me she went to teiko.” reo says, sighing a bit as he removes his classmate’s arm off his body. the other boy is astonished by the fact, “woah, that powerhouse? the kiseki no sedai are there!” “think she knows kise ryouta?” his girl classmate urgently asks, yet all these questions were tiring reo out. the two know of each other, and it was just around two weeks ago, it annoyed him a bit that rather than finishing what they came there for he was being interrogated. “dunno, ask her yourself.”

“alright, here’s your latte.” just when another question could be fired at reo, you had came and placed the last glass of the order down on the table. gods, did reo was good to see you come back so fast and save him from his classmates. “hey, i got a question for you.” you hum in response, looking at her after you put down the tissues and straws for them. “you’re from teiko, right? do you know kise ryouta?”

“ryouta? he’s a friend of mine, what about him?” though slightly odded out, this was once again a norm for you. “great! could you give me his number?” being on the basketball team of an infamous school really had its perks and cons, and seeing how you watched the girl search through her school bag to fish out her phone meant that it was going to be one of those days. 

“can’t do that.” she stops her actions and twists her brows towards your direction. “what, why?” you shrug your shoulders at her, blunt as possible since this scenario played so many times in your life already. “i don’t know you.” the small glare is evident on the girl’s features, “fujmoto tsukina, second year jr high. now you know me, will you give it to me now?”

“i don’t just give ryouta’s number to anyone.” you were quite surprised when something like this first happened, you’d thought some people would have common sense but clearly they were either shameless or pushy. the girl at the table pouts, crossing her arms and slumping back on to her seat. “ugh, fine.” was it another fangirl crushed? definitely.

reo had to admit that you were a charismatic character, seeing your ideals and beliefs showed what type of person you were in his eyes. you were so different than all the others around him that he can’t help but be attracted at the single thought of you. noticing the gaze reo had on you makes you beam a smile, one which felt so different to him compared to the ones you gave his classmates. “if there’s nothing else that you need, i’ll be going now.”

“wait, what about your number?”

‘he still asked for it.’ reo internally sighs to himself, glancing at you to see what your reaction would be to being asked that question. ‘what’s your answer, yn?’ your body pauses for a moment, though you stand up properly and send your customer service smile towards the boy. “you’re not my type.” and without another word you walk away from the table.

“damn! she shut you down bro!” reo is beyond baffled at what you said, starting to laugh at himself the moment you were out of ear shot. it was like the more you were around the more life felt so… lively. the rest of the group pout and huff at your words, yet reo was starting to take such an interest in you. “mikage, you sure you’re friends with her?”

“right! she’s so stingy!” the female of the group groans, remembering the interaction itself annoyed her. as soon as reo hears those words leave from her mouth he starts to frown, staring at her with furrowed brows and a dark look. “don’t talk about yn like that.”

⠀⠀⠀⠀ “you off your shift?” the look of shock on your face was almost priceless in reo’s books, a small chuckle erupting from his mouth as you stood there with wide eyes. after collecting yourself, you couldn’t help but also laugh with him— you knew you probably looked funny. “what’s this? you stalking me now?”

“i just thought i’d walk you home, it’s getting pretty dark.” he was right. the sun had already changed skies with the moon that barely illuminated both your bodies, yet with the help of the tokyo street lights were you able to see him there. reo did scare you, but regardless of that you found it comforting that it was him out of anyone else in the world. 

“aren’t you sweet.” the boy sends you a toothy grin, one you can’t help but send one back. gripping hold of your school bag you make your way towards his figure, leading him towards your home. “were those your friends?”

“you could say that.” reo flatly responds to you, thinking back to the group that he was with in the cafe. “we were working on a school project.” you nod your head remembering how they interacted towards each other. “i noticed. you didn’t seem too close with them.”

“yeah, sorry about that. i know they were being kinda rude to you.” he sighs as his right hand goes to rub the nape of his neck, to say that he was embarrassed and felt bad for you was an understatement. reo knew that to some extent you had to be professional due to the fact that a word from them could get you fired. you giggle at how he reacts, feeling his honesty which noticed that many privileged like him don’t usually have. “i appreciate your concern, mikage, but i’ve dealt with worse.”

“hey,” with that simple word the conversation resets to another, your giggling dialling down as you stop to listen to what he has to say. “what’s up?” “y’know, you can call me reo.” you blink in astonishment, seeing the look of seriousness on visual. it was as if he was in a board meeting for god’s sake! but then again, it has only been a few weeks since your last encounter with him and it was the second time you saw him in person was today. maybe he just rather be called by his first name?

“sure we aren’t going too fast?”

“what?”

“in this relationship.”

“huh—?!” the shocked look of wide eyes and a blush that hid under the darkness of the night sky is what causes you to burst out in laughter as you clutch your stomach. “i’m just kidding! don’t get your panties in a knot, pretty boy.” 

“you’re so unexpected.” it takes reo a second to recover from your joke, cheeks pouted out for a few moments. his head is a bit jumbled by what you said to him, who wouldn’t? he watches as you finish your laughing fit, wiping a tear of joy from your eyes after witnessing an award winning expression. “i get that a lot.”

“well, this is my apartment.” you point to the building right around the corner in a quiet neighbourhood, it had a modern look to it with a slightly old infrastructure. you lead him up the stairs to the second floor and stop at the very last door that had number fourteen on it. you go through your school bag to take out your keys. “did you want to come inside?”

“sure, if that’s alright with you.” since he was there and had time to spare he thought why not? it was you who invited him in the first place as well. “it’s no problem,” you nod your head and turn the doorknob for the place to open up. you take a step in and open the lights to the entrance of your cosy apartment, “a bit cramped so i hope you don’t mind. make yourself at home though.”

he answers with a hum, mumbling out ‘pardon for the intrusion’ before taking a step in your home. reo takes off his shoes and places it beside where you have left yours, noticing that there wasn’t many shoes on the rack. “do you live by yourself?”

“yeah, my parents are always abroad so it’s just me.” you casually throw your bag on your sofa as you make your way to your kitchen not even bothering to turn the lights on. it was already such an exhausting day for you. from basketball practice in the morning and a full shift having to deal with rather rude customers; yet you can’t really complain since you chose that sort of lifestyle.

“it’s probably not as big as your mansion, but here,” opening up your freezer you grab hold of a popsicle, taking out the wrapper and snapping it in half. “i know you just ate but share this with me.” reo looks at your hand as you make your way towards him, he gives a rather odded out expression as you direct the other half of the popsicle to him. you chuckle and urge him to take it, one which he hesitates to take. “thanks.”

you shot one of your signature smiles at him, though to reo your smile just made his heart skip a beat. with a smile that elegant he felt like he was dreaming. what was this feeling? the more he steps closer to you as you make your way towards such a small balcony, watching as you lean on the railings while the wind plays with your hair, hell, even the curtains started to dance along the night breeze. the way the moon shines down and blesses your skin was like looking at a goddess, and reo knew in this moment you were much more than just a simple girl he met at an arcade.

“from now on let’s stick together, reo.”

this was where mikage reo knew he found his treasure.

⠀⠀⠀⠀ “oh look at these,” you stop by a stall on the way to the train station, a shop which sells charms of all sorts. your eyes land on a minimalistic phone charm which had a golden bell and a deep plum stone connected to it all with a white string. you point at the object catching your friend’s attention, “it’s so cute reo!”

the two of you were on the way to meet up with nagi at an arcade on a wonderful saturday afternoon, the sun shining on both your figures to warm up the skin on your bodies. nagi who was late as per usual was not yet there, and reo who had went to pick you up from your apartment earlier that day had suggested you might as well browse around and look at the things in tokyo.

“those are real amethyst.” the elderly shopkeeper states, smiling at the two of you to urge you closer to her booth. reo didn’t care much if it was real or not, but the way he watches your body looks at the charms with so much interest he couldn’t help himself. “we’ll take two.” “wha—” it wasn’t the first, and it will never be the last where reo would impulsively buy something just because you mentioned it, you love the thought, but it weighed down on your consciousness that in the long run he has spent a lot on you subconsciously.

“close your mouth yn, you’ll catch a fly.” reo lets out a chuckle, glancing at your flabbergasted expression with amusement. the boy fishes out his wallet to pay for two of the exact ones you had pointed out earlier. “why did you buy it?” you pout at the boy who soon hands you one of the charms, the two of you sitting down at the side to attach it to your phones.

“it looked nice.” though he won’t say it verbally that it was because you like it, he genuinely thought that the charms you saw were beautiful pieces. he pops his phone case off, wrapping the small section of string through the holes intended for the charm to go in “besides, these are best friend charms for the both of us.”

“that’s a first.” mirroring reo’s actions, you stop when he places his hand to you for him to wrap the charm himself for you. though reluctant, you gave your phone to him, a smartphone which he forced you to take two years ago saying that it’ll ‘help’ him contact you better. you knew he was bullshitting and was just giving you excuses to receive the phone.

“i can give it to nagi if you don’t want it.” he gives you a side eye, taking the charm and halting his movements from putting it on your phone case. you gasp at him, obviously offended to why he would suggest that. “don’t you dare!”

you lunge forward at reo, but due to that guy’s superior physique he stretches his arm faster than you could grab the charm from him. one hand landing on the other side of reo’s body and your other hand outstretched to the sky, yet even with your efforts you couldn’t reach the charm. lady luck really wasn’t on your side today, leaning a bit too fast caused your momentum to throw yourself on reo, and the boy securingly wraps his arm around your waist so you wouldn’t tumble and fall.

if you let out a breath now, reo would for sure feel the graze of your lips moving ever so slightly on his. both hues stare so deeply at the other, faces centimetres away with noses touching each other as light as a feather falling. it was cliché, and the both of you knew that. yet you can’t help this feeling of attraction to your best friend, it was like your heart was beating in sync with his. 

as reo lets go of your waist you sit up just as fast as you look away from him, hands laying on your lap with your cheeks turn into a pink blaze. you manage to croak out a measly, “i’m sorry” to him where he just nods at you. the both of you didn’t know how long you were in that position, but was enough to make your hearts go in a frenzy. the sa

words cannot describe such a feeling of catharsis that threatens to escape through the heart— was it really worth the risk?

“just don’t get upset yn.” he wasn’t too sure if you were alright with the silence, but reo knew for a fact it didn’t sit well with him at all. as a sigh came out from his mouth, he tried to ignore the fact that the tips of his ears were burning a bright red colour. with that one comment alone you reset back to your conversation. “you threatened to give our friendship charms to him!”

“thought you didn’t want it.” the boy flat out states something from earlier, but you roll your eyes at him, finally looking at the face that mocks you teasingly. “i do though!” you grab hold of your phone case once more, hand out for the charm as this time he finally obliges and has it to you. reo watches as your slender fingers work with the string to put it into your case. you finish by putting your case back on your phone

“because look, we’re matching.” you take reo’s phone from his lap and hold the two devices side by side to show him. lo’ and behold the two charms matching with both your phones. your grin doesn’t fail to make the boy’s feel some type of way. just the way you smile at him is enough to question why you weren’t in his arms.

“wherever i am, you’ll always have a piece of me with you.”

⠀⠀⠀⠀ “when do you plan on telling yn we’re going to this blue lock?” nagi mumbled, eyes focusing on his phone as he tries to win a fighting game. him and reo recently finished school club activities, walking back to their respective places. nagi momentarily moves his eyes to glance at reo who shows the look of distraught on his face. “i was going to visit her today after work to let her know we were going.”

“she’s not gonna be happy.” reo’s white-haired friend stated, a groan leaving the said male’s lips just thinking about how upset you’d be when you hear the entirety of what the project is about. “i know.”

“well i’ll leave you to do that, i’m going home.” nagi had no interest in your guys’ quarrel, especially knowing since he’d felt the terror of ln yn before. so this was an off limits final boss that he had no magic armour to participate in. reo shoots a semi-small glare, knowing as much as nagi that the situation was less than optimal but is undeniably unavoidable. “thanks for the support.”

“no problem. i’m tired, so tell yn i said hi.” he gives reo a thumbs up as a sign of good luck against the final boss, waving his hand right after he had done the same. “yeah, i’ll see you nagi.” the second year heaves in a small breath, walking towards where you worked. the automatic doors open once they notice his presence, and there you were.

his plum hues land on your figure that had been helping with a customer over the counter, your signature customer service smile so bright as you hand the bag of goods to the person. reo wasn’t going to deny it, as many times he had seen you in uniform for work, your beauty never ceases to blow him away. be it at work or just a bare face, he knows you made him feel such a warmth in his stomach. 

“reo! just give me a second, i gotta have to clock out.” it took him a moment to realize you were already standing in front of his figure with the smile that causes his stomach to go through twists and turns. reo nods his head, smiling back at you. “take your time.” he watches as you wave your hand out, bidding you a short ‘bye!’ before you grab hold of your water bottle and head to the staff room to change.

reo walks out the store, waiting by the entrance of the building as he continues to check through his social media to see what the world was up to— not much interested him really. despite having his phone in his hand, the thought of your sad look that may grace such visuals made his heart crack just a bit. why did it hurt like this?

“alright, i’m all done! thanks for waiting for me.” your voice breaks him out of his train of thought, eyes scanning your once work uniform now in your school attire. reo nods his head to show you that he heard you, a smile to greet your figure as you take your position beside him.

the walk home seemed… awkward on your end. it was unusual for reo to seem tense around you, and he knew that you knew he was hiding what was on his mind. with an expression that shows reo’s slightly furrowed brows and droopy eyes, it wasn’t hard to tell that he was distracted.

“hey, i gotta tell you something.” you flinch at his sudden words, much to your surprise he was the first to break the silence. your mouth was already open, yet he beat you to it— perhaps knowing how awkward he was making this. “what’s up?”

“me and nagi got accepted to this blue lock to train for football.” a small gasp leaves your lips, a grin spreading from ear to ear. immediately your first response was to jump hug him ( one which you gained a habit from nagi ). a loud giggle runs through reo’s ears, his body slightly leaning forward due to your leap on him. “that’s great! you guys are aiming to be the best in the world!”

“here’s the thing,” reo starts as he sucks a breath in, his tone was far from happy which causes you to raise your brows at his rather negative reaction. “i don’t know how long i’ll be gone.” your movements stop as your arms remove itself from around reo’s neck, much to his dismay. you regain your posture, standing up straight to face him, the smile on your face slowly drops at the news. “you’re leaving?”

“just temporarily.” it hurt reo to see this look on your face, it burns his heart knowing the smile falters from such a face like yours. you couldn’t lie to him even if you told you weren’t happy with his decision, but who were you to stop him from his dreams? it’s a hard pill to swallow, but you never wanted to get in the way of him and his future so you can’t help but put on a smile, “don’t make me wait too long.”

“and then what? are you gonna leave me?” he didn’t really want to hear the answer, even if he was praying to the gods that keep you from answering it. reality was always inevitable in many ways than one, and that included you.

“of course not.” to reo, your smile was as angelic as the day he met you. the wind plays with the locks of your hair, causing you to lift your hand up and put the strands behind your ear. reo can’t deny it, just your existence alone made his heart beat out of his chest— winning the world cup was almost a side quest to him in that moment. 

“i’ll just miss you too much.”

and that’s how mikage reo knew he had fallen in love with you.

⠀⠀⠀⠀ “hey, yn’s working right now right?” reo notices that nagi had been texting you, or so they were notifications from three hours ago. the white haired boy nods his head at him, showing the chat which just consisted of you and nagi talking about how work was ever so busy on your end. “hmm, yeah, said she got a full shift.”

“you know when it ends?” reo quickly scans the text messages that nagi was willing to show him, but the boy shrugs his shoulders after trying to recall what you had texted earlier that morning. “beats me… you text her.”

“woah, hold up.” multiple blue lock players freeze on the spot when they hear their conversation, stopping whatever they were doing and stare at the two boys who only hum in confusion. “‘she’?” another presses on, moving towards nagi and reo while a few others follow suit. the lot of them were in shibuya having a break from training, and were hanging out until the topic of you disrupted the flow of things. 

“who’s yn?” the first to ask is isagi, just as interested as everyone to hear your name being casually dropped in a conversation with nagi. to him it was the first to see reo be interested in something other than the said boy, so he couldn’t help himself but be curious. chigiri gapes at reo a bit, “is she your girlfriend or something?”

“she’s my best friend!” reo yells out rather too defensively which makes many of them question his feelings for you. the boys snicker, not even bothering to respond back as the smirks and evil grins some of them had only made the lilac haired footballer to lift a fist up along with his middle finger.

“i thought i was your best friend?” nagi was nowhere near offended, in fact he didn’t mind at all since he knew how reo looked at you. before the rich boy could answer back nagi heaves a sigh and leans his head on the table, “well, it don’t matter anyways… you want yn to be your girlfriend.”

“don’t just say shit like that, nagi!” reo screams out, making nagi only close his eyes, lips pursing into an ‘x’ like shape as he takes both of his index fingers and plugs it into his ears; mumbling things along the line that he was being too loud.

“oh, now we gotta meet ‘er!” the black haired boy; karasu gets up from his seat which causes a chain reaction where the other boys who are equally invested in figuring out this mystery girl that reo and nagi are talking about. reo panics a bit as he also stands up when they do, trying to stop their advances. “she’s working right now!”

“who cares.” otoya shoots at him, holding reo’s right forearm and urges him to get a move along. seeing how reo almost fell, karasu quickly grabs his left forearm to drag him forward as well. the boy gave a smug grin, joining in on the teasing, “i’m sure you’re dying to see her!”

“alright! let go of me!” reo is now struggling to even keep you to himself, and he knew for a fact that these guys were not gonna let you go after carelessly mentioning you. the boy stretches his arms out in an attempt to get out of the two’s grasp, which they did. 

reo can hear multiple other players asking nagi to lead the way, as well as asking who you were. when he looks up from groaning and struggling free, he could already see half of them walking away from his figure. “yay! to yn-chan!” reo could not catch a break, easily when bachira threw himself on the said boy’s back. 

⠀⠀⠀⠀ “oh yn, you’re always helpful as usual.” you chuckle at the elderly woman in front of you, giving her the change she has from the purchase. with two hands you hand the receipt to her, giving a courteous bow. “thanks so much, tanaka-san. i’ll follow up next week to see how that cream is doing for you!”

“such a sweet child, tell that mikage friend of yours hello for me!” tanaka swipes her hand down in a slow motion, flustered to hear such kind words coming from you. she gives you a sweet smile before giving a wave and heading out towards the exit of the store. “not too sure when i’ll be seeing him, but i’ll let him know.”

“she’s yn?”

“holy shit.”

“she’s so glamorous!” 

“ya girlfriend’s a hottie.”

“like i said, yn isn’t my girlfriend.” his words are stern and sharp, almost malice dripping out from his tone of voice. reo is irritated at this point, throughout the entire walk to get to your workplace they had been non-stop asking questions about you that he would have rather they have not asked, and answered questions he had not wanted to answer. at this point he’s convinced that they’re doing this to annoy him.

“she’s not your girlfriend, so can i make her mine?” 

“back off!” otoya face drops from a bright up to an irritated look. his phone was already out to ask for your number. though that was what caught the group’s attention, but how both reo and nagi had shut them down at the same time. “woah, even nagi’s agreeing!”

“reo?” your eyes connect with the said male’s lavender gems, ones which held the warmth and comfort you always looked for. your eyes widen at the sight of him standing just a few feet away from you, were you dreaming? your body freezes what it was doing watching as he starts to make his way to where you were, until he stands right in front of being.

“i’m back, yn.” 

the way your eyes brighten, hiding the glistening sea that almost escapes your hues shows the feelings of sadness she had been suppressing. in a quick motion you wrap your arms around him into an embrace, the feeling of joy overwhelming you that you’d even discard the professionalism you were supposed to have. but in this moment you wanted no other but to feel his warmth back in your arms.

the action catches reo off guard, not knowing that you’d even react this way after not seeing him for a couple weeks. the tips of his ears flush that pink, arms hesitantly wrapping around you in a slightly awkward manner. this wasn’t the first that you two have hugged, but this type it felt different.

“i can’t believe you’re here! i saw the game!” pulling away a bit too soon than reo had wanted, you take a step back to quickly fix your attire. to you, this was one of the moments you had dreamed of for the last few weeks. yet to reo, he was quickly shutting down any sort of snickering remarks he was quietly hearing from his blue lock mates. though the mention of the game catches his attention, “you were at the stadium?”

“i worked a shift… but i was watching it on my phone.” you playfully stick a tongue out with your peace sign, sending an animated wink his way which seemed to have caused reo to sigh in defeat at your antics, once again.

“hi yn.” a familiar white haired boy steps into your field of view. the sight of him made your body excited just remembering the moves the two of them did during the game— in fact you never saw nagi be that motivated for anything in his life! “nagi! you guys looked so cool!” the boy nods his head, a small smile creeping up his lips. “thanks.”

“are these your teammates?” you point to a rather large group of boys that was currently occupying a good chunk of your section. almost all of them were identifiable thanks to the close ups and names that popped during the game, yet seeing them in person did kinda make you feel nervous. reo notices the shift in your body language, he steps a foot closer to your body and puts a hand of your shoulder to ease you up. “yeah, from blue lock. we were hanging out and passing by when we heard you were on shift.”

“it’s nice to meet you, yn.” the first to greet you was a certain male that you were very familiar with— in fact, he was quite popular outside of blue lock already. mouth gapes open to see the brunette male and his signature glasses moving forward to you with a bow. “oh my gosh, you’re really yukimiya kenyu!”

“you’re a fan?” maybe yukimiya should’ve expected this; he knew he was popular with the ladies due to his modelling career outside of football, and the shocked and rather excited expression you gave when he called out to you really showed. he just wished reo would stop giving him that stink eye that he saw from the side of his peripheral vision, though it seems like you didn’t even notice your best friend was doing that. “kinda, my friends have a huge crush on you so like i just hear about you lots.”

“right. rie and rosie.” reo watches as the two of you interact with each other, the annoyance getting to him as he clicks his tongue at how excited you are to meet his teammates. a frown slightly drooping by his lips and hands by the sides of his hips as he watches you fish out your phone, “think we can get a selfie together? they’ll totally get jealous!”

“yeah, that’s no problem.” he knew he had no right to have this feeling, especially since the two of you weren’t really in a relationship but there was just something in him that made his eye twitch seeing you get so close to yukimiya, holding up your signature peace to take a selfie with the model. 

a quick ‘thank you’ and bow is given to yukimiya by you as he bows back before you direct your attention once more to the group of boys. “thanks for dropping by, let’s catch up later? i still got about half an hour left till i’m off.”

“ya wanna come hang out with us after?” karasu questions as he takes a step forward before nudging his head as a gesture to include everyone. just as you were about to decline their offer due to the fact that you were still on the clock, you felt bad for having them just wait around the store. “i’ll wait for you.” closing your mouth you look at reo who nods his head, which is very reassuring to you. a breath of defeat goes out, smiling at him you look back to the group of boys. “if that’s the case, i’d love to.”

“yn!” subconsciously you straighten your back and turn on your heels to the owner of the voice, “yes!” your manager makes his way towards where you are, looking at you, the boys behind and then back at your figure with a brow raised up. “what’s with that crowd? friends of yours?”

“yea, they’re blue lock—” your voice easily drowns over your manager’s deep one, shutting your lips tight as he waves his hand to ignore whatever you had to say to him. he sighs, not wanting to waste any time than he has to. “listen, suzuki called in sick today. i’m gonna need you to work till eight tonight.”

“but that’s overtime for me… i have plans today sir.” you wanted to give it a shot, and you knew that it was hard to convince your manager for anything but this was important to you. “we’re short staffed, you got no choice yn.” 

“sure then.” you sigh in disappointment as you nod your head. “and stop talking to your friends if they’re not gonna buy anything, you got lots to do and hourly quotas to reach.” with that your manager waves you off and leaves you be for now.

“ugh, fat pig.” you groan as your smile drops from your face, sticking your tongue out at your manager before turning around to the group of boys who were as equally as bummed out as you. arms cross over the other in an ‘x’ and you shake your head, “sorry guys, yn is cancelled for tonight.”

“hey, he’s obviously overworkin’ ya.” karasu states out while many of them look amongst themselves. chigiri suddenly starts getting worried for you and your health, stepping forward with his thoughts. “isn’t that like… illegal?” 

“what can i do? besides, i guess i am behind on rent so i need the money.” you shrug it off like another typical saturday. this wasn’t the first time you had to do this against your will, and this job was your only source of income so you had no choice but to actually stay.

“you don’t go to the same school as reo and nagi?” pulling a deadpan expression on whatever isagi says, your thumb pointing at the said two. with a more or so condescending tone you say, “you’re asking too much. my brokeass could never attend some high-class super expensive preppy school like these guys.” 

“yn, why don’t you just quit.” reo suggests but you scrunch your nose and purse your lips together, “easier said than done.”

“how much do you get paid an hour?” you hum, thinking in your head about it. “like ¥1000 per hour… on top of commission maybe i hit like ¥210,000 a month?” you try to do the quick calculations in your head, thinking how your usual monthly income looks like. reo pulls a look, softly facepalming once he hears the numbers come out of your lips, with any other purchases  you had to do on top of rent. “and rent is ¥150,000. if you told me you were behind on rent you should've told me.”

“you haven't texted me in like weeks!” pointing an accusing finger at reo, you start to remember how you were indirectly being ignored ever since he entered this blue lock ( all which comes back to you only after the excitement of seeing him again disappears ). “in fact, you didn’t tell me you were gonna be gone for that long!”

“i got preoccupied, alright? calm down yn.” reo brings his hands up in defence as you get closer to him, leaning backwards a bit due to your close proximity. many of the blue lock players chuckle and snicker at the sight of you two having a quarrel. karasu snickers, “uh-oh, yer girlfriend’s mad at ya.”

“y-you told them i was your girlfriend?” you’re taken aback by karasu’s words, really blessing the gods that you applied that blush make up today for work or else they would’ve noticed how such a pink dances across your cheeks. reo on the other hand had that exactly happen to him, more or so embarrassed that they kept insisting that the two of you were a couple. “no, i didn’t!”

“if that’s the case, i’m otoya eita. can i get your number?” you weren’t quite sure how he quickly got in front of you, touching the tips of your fingers so gently with his phone out on his other hand. you were impressed— but you were also at a lost for words in a weirded out way. you stare at his hand that touches yours for a few seconds, not really knowing how to respond to him. “yn…?”

“cut it out.” reo is glaring daggers at otoya, but he isn’t the slightest bit afraid at the purplette boy’s words whatsoever. “what, she’s not your girlfriend. that means i can take her on a date.”

“you’re not yn’s type.”

“how would you know yn’s type?”

“yn’s type is someone with money and is a complete ikemen.” 

nagi blurts rather easily, causing your face to dance with pink. “don’t call me out like that!” the rest of the boys watch as you shake nagi by his shoulders in a rather aggressive way. they’re silent, but they knew exactly who fit that description perfectly. ‘ah… so she basically likes reo.’

“yn, just quit your job already.” reo pinches his nose bridge, trying to stop the possible migraine that might come flying into his head the more he stays here and listen to this bullshit. you scoff and cross your arms at him with an incredulous look, urging him to continue with his plan. “then what?”

“work for me.” the silence is a bit too loud for everyone when reo blurts out those words. a piece of your hair falls on to your face, “what?”

“work as a maid at my place?” reo’s response was more of a question rather than an answer, one you weren’t expecting like the rest of the group. with the look of bewilderment on your face, you open your mouth, nothing coming out only for you to close it shut once more not knowing how to respond to reo.

“oh~ ain’t that kinky?” karasu chuckles at reo’s suggestion for your new occupation, one which you have no comment on for. many others nod their head and agree. hell, even nagi has something to say about it too. “i didn’t know you had those kinds of fantasies, reo.”

“shut up! or be my assistant, just quit this job yn. i can treat you better than that scum.” reo was most likely losing braincells the more he hung out with these guys, ignoring how pink his cheeks flare up for a second. this is when you finally have something to say, chuckling at reo’s cute reaction to everyone’s comments. “as much as i’d love to do just that, i can’t rely on you all the time.”

‘i wish you did.’ 

“i’ll pay you twice what you make in a month.” he sighs and twists his brows, thinking of ways just to get you to leave. you ponder on that for a bit, it was a really enticing deal though your dignity to always have reo save your ass stops you from it. you give a smile, one that hides how exhausted and painful it’s been. “thanks for the offer though, reo.”

“are you sure? he’s giving you a pretty good offer.” yukimiya urges you to take the deal knowing full well that that type of salary is above the average amount a regular worker earns. shaking your head off the concerned looks you were getting from them, your smile ever gets wider. “yeah, i think i’ll try to manage.”

“if that’s what you want, yn. i’ll always be here for you.” if he can’t change your mind, he’ll just have to live with it not wanting to pressure you into doing something you’re not comfortable with. though he reminds you that you’re not alone anymore. ‘she’s always so damn stubborn. she knows i can easily fix her problems but she never asks for help.’

“i appreciate it reo.” your smile looks sad to him, and this doesn’t go unnoticed by the human analyzer karasu. he coughs, breaking the sentimental aura around the all of you to get a move along— he felt bad, but he knew pity was the last thing you’d want from anyone. “we should probably get going, sorry for bothering you at work.”

“no, it’s fine! i’m happy to meet you guys!” you reassure them that they weren’t bothering you with reo moving to talk to you. just as the rest of the group had bid their goodbyes to you, they start to walk away.

“let’s meet up sometime this week, alright?” reo suggests, trying to make up for today’s rather unfortunate turn of events. a small laugh comes out, with your hand pushing a lock of your hair behind the ear.“i’d love that.”

“yn, get to work.” your manager’s voice is heard loud and clear in your ears, but the footsteps of mikage reo walking away from you overshadows it. though the sting of your heart to see reo with a rather disappointed expression, waving his hand and walking away from you. it was as if he was leaving you behind…

“no…” when you think about it now, did you really want to waste your youth stuck working over forty hours a week in a management that doesn’t even care for your well-being, trying to make a day’s ends meet? “what did you just say?” your manager is baffled, urging you to repeat those words again so he can hear you loud and clear.

“i said no. i don’t want to work overtime, you can't keep me here!” spinning your heels to face him full of determination, you indeed were fed up with this place. “you perverted manager!”

“why you—! then you’re fired! get out before i call security!” he screams loud and clear for even customers to hear, a vein popping by the top of his forehead. even if he towers over you, shouts and let his anger out on you, there was no shred of fear that runs through your body. you tilt your head slightly to the side and smile, “fine with me.”

“yeah~! yn-chan in her bad bitch era!” bachira cheers you on, clapping and hollering while a few others of the group whistle and make remarks about your rather boss girl moves ( all which are very proud of you ). “you tell ‘em!”

despite the glare your now former manager was bestowing on you, you felt the weight of a million burdens fall off your shoulders. your chest that felt tight to the core loosens, maybe this job really was taking your youth away without you knowing? hands take off the name tag that used to be pinned at the corner of your left shirt and placing it down on the counter. you walk away from him and towards reo that stood with a rather proud look on his face.

“reo, does that offer still stand?”

“for you, always.”

⠀⠀⠀⠀ “where’s everyone else?” you exit from the building, looking for a certain group of football players that you would have thought would make a commotion. though reo was the only one you saw, not like you minded. in fact, you preferred it this way. your voice causes reo to look up from his phone in the same spot he would always wait for you to finish your shift. the messages he was getting from the group telling their whereabouts were. 

“told them to just hit the arcade and we’ll catch up with them.” he says as he scans your body while you move in front of him. the more reo looks at you the more he sees that nothing had changed at all, you were still in your uniform and the only difference about your appearance now is that you were holding your bag. the boy raises a brow, slightly offsetted at the turn of events. “you didn’t change?”

“i wasn’t planning on going anywhere after work.” you deadpan while shaking your head. this motion was enough for reo to get the jest of it, knowing full well with what you meant as a small ‘oh’ comes out from him. reo points with his thumb behind him towards the whole of shibuya. “then let’s just buy some new clothes.”

“i’m broke,” you scoff, baffled at his sudden declaration. this wasn’t a first that he suggested things like this, in fact; you should’ve been used to it by now! a hand manages to be placed on the side of your hips, the other lazily pointing a finger at yourself. “how do you expect me to buy clothes?”

“the least i could do for not texting you back.” reo brings his hand out to yours, that smirk of his making you succumb to his antics once more. this man is one-tracked, you knew if he wants something he’ll definitely get it one way or another. though reluctant and even opposing his idea, you hand him your bag to carry as the both of you start to walk towards the shopping district of shibuya. “fine. but don’t spend too much on me, i feel bad.”

“what do you have to feel bad for?” he blinks his periwinkle hues thrice, glancing towards your figure from the corner of your eyes. the two of you continue to cross the infamous shibuya crosswalking, moving closer to you so neither of you could get separated from the crowd. you pout, looking at a different direction away from his gaze. “you’re my best friend, i feel like i’m using your money.”

‘right, best friend.’ those words stung, especially since it came from the same lips he always wanted to kiss so badly. he didn’t mind if he said it since he didn’t want to risk losing you, but when it’s you who says those words it would make his stomach churn. “let’s go to this store.” reo grabs hold of your wrist, dragging you to the store that had caught his attention.

‘that’s pretty.’ the moment reo had let go of you, you had already started booking it to the nearest outfit that caught your eye. he can’t help but smile at how you immediately started getting happy at all the amazing outfits you could pull off with just that one shirt you were looking at. “does anything catch your attention?”

“wait, this place is kinda pricey…” your eyes are ready to pop out of your sockets when you see the multiple zeros at the end of the number on the price tag, contemplating if you should even let reo buy anything from here for you.

“just let me spoil you, princess.”

“if you insist, my prince charming.”

when it came to free stuff, reo realized quickly it was easy to convince you on three things; food, clothes and anime. in fact, he had bought you an airfryer for your birthday once and the fact that you didn’t stop posting and raving about your airfryer on your instagram for a good three months made him think you just haven’t started to feel alive yet. 

“what do you think?” opening the curtains of the dressing room you stood there with all your glory on the platform with reo just waiting for you to come out on one of the sofas. you wore a rather oversized sweater with a linear pattern to it coloured in white, blue and maroon. a pair of blue baggy jeans to finish off your simple look for today’s outing.

“you look beautiful.” even if you didn’t ask, reo would have said it already. especially since you had let him agree to even pick out the clothing he couldn’t help but stare at awe. the look of infatuation in reo’s eyes makes you want to melt, “t-thanks.”

“let’s get outta here?” a hand goes out to you, and you gladly accept as you eagerly want to go see the others and get to know the people reo had spent his days with. your phone vibrates in your back pocket, so you reach out to it and see that it’s an email from your former manager. you click on the attachment, and there it shows your contract with the company nulled. “oh, i just got the termination letter from my manager.” 

“you really made a flashy exit, huh?” the both of you can’t help but laugh at what you did back there, even you still don’t believe you did that. “yeah, to be honest i was so fed up working with him and trying to keep up with the hours…”

“let’s just sue him for breaking youth labour laws and wrongful termination.” why didn’t you think of that? you have yet to turn seventeen and he had already made you go overtime, which was against the law in the first place ( thanks to reo even reminding you ). “you’re a genius!”

multiple bags soon fill up the counter, one employee folding clothes to put in the bag as another scans them. they were like woodswork, going at a swift and quick paste. though you and reo waiting at the counter confuses you since the two of you were the only customers in the store. you point at the ever growing line up of bags, “wait, whose are those?”

“they’re for you.” reo says so nonchalantly you could break down by just looking at the total of all of them. especially since reo gives you such an innocent smile that hides the intent of spoiling you like spare change. “we only agreed to have you buy my outfit today, not an entire closet.” you pout at him but he looks away, “just accept my gift.”

“won’t change your mind even if i said please?” you inch closer to the boy, giving him your best selling puppy dog eyes to see if he would budge if you were to act this cute. “nah.” the same ones he gave a side eye too before inserting his card in, a few button presses and the transaction goes through.

⠀⠀⠀⠀ “woah, what took ya guys s‘long?” karasu is the first to notice the two of you walking towards the bowling lane that was assigned to the group. many others turn their heads to anticipate the both of you who wave back at them. a specific heterochromia captain, oliver is amused at the sight of you, “who’s the girl?”

“oh god— almost everyone from the game is here.” you recognize many faces, seeing how half of them were on the opposing team of the football game you had watched. the look of excitement to be able to meet such talented players is shown all over your face. “yeah, we’re bowling with them.”

“wanna join us, yn-chan?” bachira is waving his arm nice and big, urging you to come to their side of the bowling lane. your eyes light up at the invitation, “can i?!” “‘course ya can! be on our team.” karasu gestures you to come over to them and you move your feet to make your way to their group. “don’t mind if i do then!”

“she your girlfriend?” oliver walks over to reo who gives a dissatisfied look, out of everyone he didn’t expect the other team to also be interested in you. “she’s not.” he flat out says, but the look on oliver’s face shows that he’s amused by reo’s reaction. “doesn’t seem that way.”

“what’s in the bag?” yukimiya approaches reo with otoya in tow, everyone’s eyes now looking down at the paper bag that reo had been holding ever since arriving with him. “yn’s uniform.”

“did you buy her clothes?”  the model asks, intrigued with how everything has been playing out today for you and reo. somehow, reo senses that he’s being picked on and his brow starts to twitch slightly. “i mean she just quit.”

“she quit just for you.”

“stop fuckin’ annoying me you guys.”

“yn’s up!” chigiri hollers after you when the name switches to yours on the tv screen. you stand up all excitingly after you put on your bowling shoes, the boys cheering your name as you look for a bowling ball that wouldn’t weigh too much when you throw it.

“i’m gonna strike this!” with a rather smug grin you cockly announce, quickly making your way towards the bowling lane you let go of the bowling ball from your fingers. you as well as everyone watch as all pins fall down in one full swipe. you jump up with your arms out wide, laughing out loud with everyone on your side as the tv reads ‘strike!’ 

“hell yeah! all hail yn-chan!” bachira screams all excited, jumping on your back along with nagi. you can’t lie that all of them were feeding your ego a bit too much. you go around giving high fives to them all congratulating you for your flawless strike.

“beat that. you shits are losing to a girl.” barou taunts the other group with a smug grin, one which touches you because you heard a few things about him and complimenting you almost even made you an egoist. you make your way towards barou, wide smile with hands up for a high five. though he scowled at you, he grumbled things along the lines of ‘it’s only ‘cuz you got a strike you deserve this’ before giving you the double high five you wanted.

“awe, look at ‘em bein’ some proud boyfriend.” karasu who bares his teasing smirk crosses his arms and looks at reo who had been admiring you from afar, watching you get excited with the players that he had grown close with. he loves how your smile just gets brighter the more he watches you, your laughter tuning out everything else from the rest of the world— or so it did until karasu opened his damn mouth. “shut the fuck up.”

“how long have you known reo?” isagi takes a seat beside you, easily taking an interest between you and reo’s relationship. you hum in response, quickly thinking about the first time you and reo had met. “it’s been three years now? we met second year of jr high at an arcade.” the boy’s eyes smile at his new found discovery, quietly applauding such a long time friendship that the two of you had. “woah, it’s been a while then! it’s weird, nagi and reo never mentioned you whatsoever.”

“because reo said if we mentioned yn there’s a possibility that you guys would hit on her.” nagi walks over to the two of you, finishing his turn to bowl. the young boy scratches the nape of his neck as he takes the seat on the other side of you. you didn’t mind, to be honest you saw it coming since you were kept a secret from the blue lock members which may have been for better. though, it might’ve been because nagi and reo cared too much to share you with the others and that thought made you giggle. “ah, and he was right, huh.”

“omg, are those the football players from tv?” you turn your head with a few others to spot a crowd of girls who had their phones out and talking to themselves, giggling to see so many boys in one area playing a game of bowling ( while also completely ignoring you there ). two boys, respectively otoya and sendou went up to them asking for their socials. “they’re so handsome!”

“could we take a picture together?” reo looks to his side as he comes into contact with a female, her face flushed and shy at his presence alone. you could tell she had a crush on the football player, seeing how her phone was out and the lockscreen was reo from the game they had. the boy pauses for a moment, before nodding his head and moving beside her. “sure.”

“what’s with the face?” chigiri who stands a few feet in front of you tries to hold in his laugh at how you had a deadpan expression, eyes slightly furrowed and watching at reo and the other girl’s interaction. isagi notices your change in aura, looking at where your eyes had directed and examines your face, you looked like you were trying to burn holes behind that girl’s back. “you look jealous.”

“i am not.” you snap back at the two of them, but their chuckles only cause you to lowly growl ( in a cute way ) at them. you knew they were teasing you, but were you really that damn obvious that you didn’t like how reo was talking to a bunch of fans? was it because you thought some of them even looked prettier than you? 

“i thought you liked reo.” nagi inserts himself into the conversation, overhearing it after he had took his turn throwing the bowling ball. the boy makes his way to sit on the other side of you, and out of everyone you didn’t really want nagi to know because you making him a third wheel was something you’d rather avoid. you wave your arms in front of your body, trying to justify your actions and what you said, “i-i do! he’s my best friend—”

“yn stop lying to yourself.” your white haired friend’s words are sharp, as if stabbing you and stopping you from spouting anymore excuses. it was like getting hit with nagi’s ult and immediately you were shut down. you whine in response to his words, elbows being placed on your lap and your chin laying on the palm of your hands.  chigiri and isagi nervously laugh since they didn’t know how else to react because they knew you had accepted the truth.

“just give it a chance, maybe he’ll like you back!” isagi is the first to try and cheer you up, trying to get you back to the positivity you were in before nagi had hit you with his negativity. chigiri nodding his head and seconding that opinion, trying to make you look at the bright side of things. 

“we’re not close enough to be having this conversation, isagi.”

your eyes lazily give isagi a side eye with an exasperated sigh, not even bothering to turn your head fully to acknowledge him. maybe he’s right, or maybe not. at this point you were probably coming to a dead end. the said boy bashfully scratches the nape of his neck, chuckling and agreeing to your words, “i guess you’re right.”

“yn! let’s exchange contacts!” bachira comes running back to you after his turn is up, phone in hand along with a large grin. you sit up properly and smile back at him before standing up and walking over to the table. “sure, bachira meguru right?” you spot your phone with many others that lay on the table, glancing back at bachira whole sends finger guns your way and a playful wink. “bingo~!”

the others also ask to exchange contacts with you, and you happily accept it before everyone huddles around your figure and bringing out their phones. you go to your contact profile, showing them your number so they can insert it into their profile. “that charm…” chigiri notices the bell and amethyst that hangs from your phone, and with him bringing it up the other two start to take notice of it.

“oh, this?” seeing how everyone was now looking at the charm you had attached, you bring it up into a better view after the trio had finished putting your number in. all three of them stare intently at him, yet your smile comes forth everytime you see this charm. “reo bought it for me a few months back.”

“i knew i saw it before!” isagi points at the charm in your hand, not really knowing what he means by that. the three football players then recall back to the u-20 game where reo had left his phone out, and everyone thought it was chigiri’s due to the slightly cutesy girly charm by the phone. bachira giggles, feeling all giddy just thinking about the two of you. “you two like to match, huh? it’s so cute!”

“you could say that?” why did you even say that? because you have absolutely no idea what they’re referring to. blinking your lashes thrice they just giggle at you, as if they didn’t even want to inform you in the first place.

“what’s not cute is when they flirt in front of my face sometimes.” nagi’s voice interrupts their giggling, you gasp dramatically at him. when you look at nagi he looks away, avoiding eye contact with you knowing you’re just going to lecture him.  “we do not do that in front of you!”

“so you two do flirt with each other!” bachira gives you a teasing grin with the other two, hand in front of him as if he was one of those gossip girls. he wiggles is brows at you, causing the peachy hues burn the tips of your ears and slapping him ( affectionately ) on the arm as an attempt to stop their teasing. “that’s not what i meant!”

⠀⠀⠀⠀ “so what do you think about the guys from blue lock?” after the lot of you finished a day filled with fun activities, reo had offered to take you home, as per usual. you can’t help but give him a big grin. “they’re nice,” you think back to all the new memories and friends you made today, it was probably the most fun you had in years. yet what really made it special was the way reo smiled when he was with them. “you looked like you genuinely were enjoying yourself.”

“hey, that was back in jr high.” he retorts back making you laugh at him. you remember all those times he had study sessions at the old cafe you worked in, it was really a sight to see such a social bird still being picky to who he talks to. “when you hung out with the classmates you had, it was like there was a wall between you and them!”

“they were snobby, yn.” his matter-of-fact tone doesn’t go unnoticed by you, which gives you a chance to tease him once more. you use your elbow and gently nudge his side, “oho? and i’m not?”

“‘course not! you’re literally one of the most precious people in my life.” the way reo had said those words struck your heart, it wasn’t the usual sarcastic one he would throw at you when you were teasing him, it felt more honest. your lips slowly curl into a smile, looking at the ground you walk to avoid eye contact with him. “i can say the same to you too, reo.”

“are you free tomorrow night?” breaking a string of silence after the previous topic, he glances down to you where you pull a questionable look towards him, not really knowing how to answer. “i mean, i quit my job? so, yeah, i am.”

“my parents are making me go to this party, i’m wondering if you want to go with me?” you ponder on the offer for a bit, humming in the process as you think about it. “i don’t have the facilities to pull off anything remotely close to all this rich stuff. what’s in it for me?”

“there’s free food.” 

“you should’ve started with that.” giving a rather dramatic hand gesture, you lightly tap his chest making him laugh at your antics. you smile at him, loving how such a joyous sound could emit from his lips. “food really is your love language, huh?”

“of course! growing up in the working class, you might not know my dear struggles.” you bring two fists up to your eyes as you pretend to cry and wipe your tears away, fake sobs here and there as you ramble on about minimum wage jobs and rude customers. reo blinks his lashes, slightly done with how you indicated that such hardships cannot be found in the day to day life of a rich boy. he rolls those lavender hues, “haha, very funny yn.”

“wait, do i wear a dress?” you immediately look up, the party suddenly sinking into your brain. if it was a social gathering that his parents was making him go, then wouldn’t that mean that it was going to be a formal party that included wearing decently expensive clothing that your paycheque could never handle? the thought of that makes your brain spiral, and reo easily saw the look of distress on your face despite the smile. “there’s one in the bag for you.”

“oh, so you were gonna bring me to the party from the very beginning?” sighing in relief you had dodged a financial bullet to the heart, though that makes you look at all the bags reo had been carrying for you all day. you’re reminded of how you went back to one of the train station lockers to get all the bags. “i knew you’d be free.”

“anyways, thanks for being there for me today.” as the two of you near your apartment door, you open up your home for the two of you to come in. “i’m happy to see you again.” reo places multiple bags near the entrance of your doorway before heading back out again. he gives you a sweet toothy grin, “anything for you.”

chuckling at him, you take a step out of your apartment towards reo. taking to heart what a certain striker had told you earlier, you took your chances. placing your lips on reo’s cheek makes your heart beat faster than the force of a football being kicked into the goal, eyes shut close as you make this quick. reo stands there in a blushing mess as he watches you retract back into your apartment and closing the door in front of him.

“goodnight, reo.” 

⠀⠀⠀⠀ “i’m nervous, i’ve never been to these things before.” when reo had guided you up some rather luxurious stairs, you knew instantly this was not a lifestyle you were used to. the feeling of your stomach wanting to flip inside out earlier has a whole new meaning to you now; one that involves trying to walk through this black evening gown and heels reo left at your apartment last night.

“don’t worry, you look beautiful.” the boy takes your hand in an attempt to soothe your worries away, his thumb ever so gently rubbing the back of your hand as he takes the lead and carefully helps you up the stairs to the entire mansion. you puff out your cheeks without fully soaking in what he just said, eyes looking at the staircase to watch where you were placing your foot so you wouldn’t trip up. you weakly groan at him, “i know, but that wasn’t my concern—”

“just wanted to let you know.” quickly reo takes hold of your hand and pulls you close to him, his arm wrapping around your waist as he pulls you close to his chest after you had successfully missed the last step of the stair. a rather defeated look plays on reo’s face when he sees how clumsy you were in the dress, noting to himself to probably not have given you feels nor a dress like that if he knew you were just going to place your face on the ground within the first thirty minutes of you wearing it.

“jeez, pretty boy.” as you try to keep up the farce that you weren’t embarrassed by how close you were to him, you look away for a bit, hand placing on to his chest to create some distance between the two of you. taking a step back, you start to rethink your life choices up from the moment you put the damn dress on to now.

after last night it was unfortunately normal between the two of you, much to your dismay. you had thought that if you at least made the first move reo would start to realize you liked him more than just a best friend. in fact, the ride in the limo was awkward for you, and up until now it still is because he has yet to mention last night to you. gods, this is not good for your heart.

“the food table is over there if you want to calm down.” reo knows exactly what was on your mind, especially since he was the reason you had the look of discomfort. he nudges his head to the side where your eyes track to; which was a long table of hand food for you to eat. instantly the clouds that flew in the sky of your mind is wiped away at the view of such delectables— some you’ve never have even seen before. “can i take some of it home?”

“knock yourself out.” though it was only for now, reo had successfully distracted you from your mind that was hung up on last night. you happily make your way to the food table with reo following behind, grabbing your phone and taking all sorts of videos and pictures of such high class food before getting a plate to eat all of it.

“i’ll be right back, alright?” reo is behind your body as he puts his hand by your waist, him being a bit too close for your comfort. you can’t bring yourself to look back at him when you start to stiffen up, for god’s sake you can feel his breath on the nape of your neck already.  “my father’s business partner is calling me over, stay here.”

“i’ll see you soon.�� trying to hide the voice crack that emerges from your voice box, you knew reo had heard it. his hands stops lingering by your waist before nodding his head and walking away, then only then did you dare to look at him disappear into the crowd. you knew that if he stayed any longer your heart might go into cardiac arrest.

“odd to see your face here, waitress.” taking you out of your trance is a slender woman around your age, your eyes dart to look at her stoic look that was unphased. you pounce on the thought for a bit, trying to see in your little pretty head if you could remember who she was, but no no avail you say, “do i know you?”

“i— why—” she fumbles on her own words, lost for what to say as she’s taken aback by your blunt response. she lets out a groan, fingers pinching her nose bridge before running her hand through her brown locks. “it’s fujimoto tsukina.”

“ah.” you had just now remembered, she was the girl reo was with in the cafe a few years ago with you. you’ve only encountered her a few times but since you never really did go to reo’s preppy school often you weren’t familiar with the people he knew other than nagi. “if you’re going to ask for ryouta’s number again, i’m still not going to give it you.”

“oh shut the fuck up!” your deadpan expression frustrates her, hands balling into fists as she’s insulted thats all you remember her for— it was three years ago. you raise a brow at her actions when she finally cools down, regaining her composure with a slight cough to calm herself. “but i’m not surprised you’re here. i take it you’re still smooching off mikage.”

“what…?” there was something with the way she worded those words that made your lips drop down into a frown, eye brows starting to scrunch up. “don’t ‘what’ me.” fujimoto heaves a prolonged sigh from her nose, rolling her chocolate hues to mock you. “there’s a reason why no one is entertaining you here. you might dress the part but a lot of us can tell you’re not part of this high class society.”

“and that’s understandable, but that’s not the answer that i’m looking for.” quickly snapping back at her, your questions start to raise each moment she’s in your presence. “i’m not smooching off reo or whatever you want to call it.”

“really? it doesn’t look that way to me.” fujimoto gestures at your figure, rolling her eyes at you. “a chanel evening dress with a matching handbag, van cleef necklace with christian dior earrings and bracelets. you’re branded head to toe, commoner.”

you knew she was right, but you never asked for any of this. you bite your bottom lip trying to hold yourself back from trying to make a scene. “i didn’t ask for any of this, i’m just borrowing it—”

“oh cut the shit, yn.” she scoffs obnoxiously, looking to the side to change her scenery before glancing back at you. fujimoto cross her arms and confidently says, “we all know mikage reo can do better than a gold digger like you.” it takes a bit to process that information— that description in general. fujimoto can see from how your face twists that you were taken aback. you blink, “are you jealous?”

“of course not! you just need to learn your place!” her face turns red and puts the blush she applied to shame, causing you to verify your suspicions. you scrunch your face up in discomfort at the second thing she said as your patience starts to run thin. “i’ve barely talked to you in my entire life.”

“that’s a good thing because you don’t belong here.” fujimoto’s voice lowers down in an attempt to scare you. she moves towards your figure whilst opening her limited edition black birkin handbag. her eyes feast on the sight of cash bundled up in her small bag, grabbing hold of the stashes of ¥10,000 banded together. the girl aggressively grabs your hand and places the money in your palm without a second thought.

“don’t bother mikage reo anymore and get the hell out of my sight.” fujimoto tsukina had just bribed you to stay away from reo. her words holds malice and resentment towards you as she looks at you ask if you were in hindrance in her eyes. you look at the cash in your hand, it was probably enough to not work for the next five years. yet the way she started to walk away from you left a bad taste in your mouth.

“fuck you.” clicking your tongue in annoyance, you can’t help but let your frustrations out at the source of your negativity. fujimoto turns around angrily at how you had addressed her after she had just selflessly helped you out; as if charity. your eyes show the rage and raw emotions you’ve been bundling up since the beginning of this conversation.

“i’m not leaving reo because i’m in love with him.”

it was your turn to unplug the cord to fujimoto’s power trip, walking up to her whistle taking the bands off the money she gave you. just as you were at a good distance from her, you effortlessly threw all the cash she handed to her right back at her face. the look of anger bubbling up on the rich girl’s face from in between the paper that fell from above only causes you to smile ever so menacingly.

“take your money, bitch.”

the last yen bill falls to the ground along with the last shred of fujimoto’s dignity, her sense and social awareness thrown out the window with only the thought of slapping your face. she tramples through the money and raises a hand to bring down on you. “why you—”

“don’t fuckin’ touch my girlfriend.” 

you never expected that hand to come down on you, but what shocked you was reo’s interference— nevermind that, but what he said is what set your mind in a spiral. reo had grabbed fujimoto’s wrist and stopping her from touching you, and by the look on his face you can see her was furious at what was happening. hell, a crowd had even started to form just now, and were already whispering to each other.

“g-girlfriend?!” fujimoto chokes on her own words, she’s more shocked about reo’s words than his appearance in your twos’ argument. his grip letting go of her wrist when he notices that she wasn’t going to go through with her movements. he furrows his brows and gives her a look as he steps in between the two of you, “you got a problem with that?”

“she’s a good digger mikage!” fujimoto’s voice is over the top, her finger accusingly pointing to the girl behind reo ; you.

“yn is one of the most honest and hard working people i know, she’s anything but a gold digger.” he scowls at her words, flicking his wrist to slap her accusing finger out of his view. “don’t you ever bother us again.”

reo grabs hold of your hand and pulls you to exit the seen of gossiping rich people who had nothing else to do but bad mouth others. you try to pick up your pace to match with his as you grab the dress with your free hand so you wouldn’t trip again as the both of you make it outside where there was more privacy for the both of you. you’re speechless, baffled and… honoured? your thoughts are all jumbled and everywhere, yet your brain is still in hung up on one thing;

“since when did i become your girlfriend?” this is when you finally snap out of your daze, looking at reo who was checking if you had gotten hurt with your argument with fujimoto. instead of being shocked to hear that you suddenly have a boyfriend now, you rather tease him for it. your eyes raising a brow of curiosity.

“ever since you said you were in love with me.” reo heaves a long sigh whilst looking out towards the garden of the mansion. he had to admit, he was being way too bold back there, but he can’t shake the thought of you getting hurt either. he had just said whatever was the quickest way to get fujimoto to back off, and calling you his girlfriend was something he didn’t think through after hearing what you said.

“you heard that?” your eyes widen slightly, were you too loud? you were sure the crowd only started to form when you called fujimoto a bitch. you felt the blush creeping up to your cheeks, tinting it with a coral colour just realizing maybe you had gone overboard with your confrontation.

“yeah,” he flatly says, swallowing the lump of saliva that was stuck in his throat. reo starts to rub the nape of his neck, moving his feet to face you, but his head hangs low due to the fact that he lost all confidence to look you in the eyes, “i’m sorry if i’ve been making things awkward for you today—”

“just shut up and kiss me.” you grab hold of the velvety tie that hangs around his neck as you pull him towards your body. you close your eyes in embarrassment as your lips move to crash into his soft ones. reo’s eyes are wide at the sudden change of pace, but he can’t deny that he’s been wanting to kiss you for all these years.

his gaze softens before he too closes his eyes to melt into the kiss. reo’s left hand wraps around your waist while the other holds you by the side of your neck to pull you close to him as he kisses your lips right back. in that moment the both of you felt like everything was finally complete, the missing piece finding its rightful place within you. your stomach erupts like little fireworks, you wouldn’t have your first with anyone other than mikage reo, but let’s keep that a secret, shall we?

in that second reo wished that you were the only air he needed in his life as the two of you gently pull away, your foreheads leaning on each other while the small shaky breathes escape from both your lips. even as the silence engulfs you whole, your sweet soft laughter comes out.

“i love you, reo.”

“i love you too.” 

snuggling your nose against his he chuckles at your actions, pulling back to leave a chaste kiss on your forehead. “let’s get out of here.” the love and sincerity in his eyes is what makes your heart skip a beat and want to melt in his gaze, his gentle touch cuffing your cheeks makes you lean towards him. 

reo wasn’t going to lie to himself any longer, nor was he going to hide how much he loves you anymore. you are the same, and maybe you’d just have to thank isagi’s encouraging words.

“wait, just one more thing.” reo raises a questioning brow at you, though not answering he was curious to know what else you had wanted to go before your departure. sending him a rather mischievous grin, you slyly take one of the wine glass from a butler. making your way to fujimoto who had been ranting about her encounter with you to other guests that attended the party. many of the guest she was with starts to quiet down as they notice you approaching behind fujimoto, before you finally go ahead and tap her shoulder.

“what the fuck do you want—” her words are cut short when you throw the glass of wine at her face. many people gasp dramatically loud which attracts the attention of many people. raising the middle finger at her, you can’t help give her your award winning smile. “i’ve always wanted to do that.”

“that’s my girl.” reo looks at your direction in a fond way. unexpected? yes, but he wouldn’t trade you for anyone in the world. your goofy grin drowns the ear piercing shrek fujimoto lets out, making you scoff before running towards reo. grasping on to his hand intertwining with yours you urge him to run with you, which he gladly accepts. “now we can go!”

“mcdonalds?”

“you treating me?”

“i’ll treat you like my princess forever.”

bachira : guys !!!! yn texted me!!! isagi : what did she say? bachira : she said ty her and reo are tgtr now isagi : told her to take her shot otoyo : she could’ve been with me aryu : thats so SLAY of her <3 chigiri : nah yn is way too whipped for reo nagi : good for them yukimiya : i hope reo can stop sending me death threats abt yn now karasu : r none of yall gonna question why tf they’re in suits n dresses in a mcds

REBLOGS ARE APPRECIATED !

© daiseukiis 2023. all rights reserved. do not repost, modify, translate without permission. do not claim work or layout as yours.

[yanderepuck]

Kinktober Day 31

AND WE'RE BACK FOR A FOURTH TIME. It's that lovely time of the year where I write mediocre smut with no plot for a whole month. So sit your ass down and take a few minutes to read some smut.

As always, kinktober is held by our local Napoleon simp, @xxsycamore

If you'd like to read the last three years, go here

Remember to reblog and tell me what you think

Non-Human Traits | Sexual Roleplay

Writers note: roleplay literally means petplay to me. Hope you enjoy.

~~

Comte bites his lip to stop.himseld making too much of a moan. His hand combs through your hair, pushing you further down.

He is keeping you under his desk as his little pet. His finger brush through the end of your hair, pushing it out of the way to grab the back of the collar that he has on you.

You look up at him as more of his cock pushes past your lips. He sits back in his chair, looking down at you.

"Ma Cherie," he gasps.

Your arms in front of you, helping you keep yourself up while you are on your knees. He has blankets and pillows under there for you. A nice little comfortable spot for you to spend your day while he does paperwork he needs to do.

He gives you little commands for when he needs you, but for the most part it's like you are a dog sleeping under his desk, wanting to be by his side.

Comte groans and pushes you down more, wanting to feel the back of your throat.

You stop for a moment before you continue to suck on him, trying to bob your head but his grip on you is a little too strong.

"Ugh. I know I basically only answer letters, but God people are stupid," he groans through his teeth and picks up his pen and leans closer to his desk to continue.

He tugs on the collar around your neck. "Stay still."

You whine softly but keeps your head still, his cock resting in your mouth as if that's where it is meant to be. As if you are a holster for it.

You try to look up at him, feeling drool coming out from the corner of your mouth. Your body shuffles back and forth, rubbing your legs together.

"As long as you are a good girl and listen to me, I'll reward you after," he lets you go to focus on his work.

Your jaw starts to get sore but that little deal gets you excited and so you don't move. You try to sit as still as possible for him even if his cock is twitching in your mouth.

After some time he sits back in his chair, looking down at you. He grabs your hair and pulls you off of him, drool connecting your tongue with his tip.

You pant, finally being able to catch your breath. He tugs upward, wanting you to stand up. You do as he wants, groaning a little from being on your knees for so long.

He turns you around to face his desk, lifting up your skirt and having you sit on him. You helped with moving your clothes, knowing exactly what he wanted. Your legs spread to be on either side of his. With your feet unable to touch the floor you have no choice but to sit all the way on him.

"Good girl," he puts an arm around your waist and moves his chair closer to his desk to keep reading something.

Your walls clench around him, getting used to his length so deep in you. Comte:s hand goes under your shirt to feel your bare skin, feeling your stomach.

"Mmm, I can feel you all the way up here," he kisses your neck and presses against your stomach making you moan.

You pant without him having to do anything. The little twitches his cock does inside of you is enough to drive you crazy. You feel like just a little thrust will get you to cum.

"A-Abel," your fingers dig into your own thighs.

"Yes, Ma Cherie?" he kisses your cheek as if your current situation isn't anything out of the ordinary.

"P-please. F-fuck me."

He covers your mouth. "Ladies don't say words like that. Try again."

You think for a moment until you're able to speak again. "Please. Just a little bit. I want to feel good," you moan.

"If you're already moaning then you must be feeling pretty good. Now sit still. Don't upset me even more than these letters. You know what will happen."

He will bend you over his desk and fuck you relentlessly so that you won't be able to walk right for days. It sounds amazing until even after that he still has you cock warming him until the end of the day.

Having him take out his anger on you sounds great until you are dripping cum all the next day when he still wants to use you for stress relief.

"Y-Yes," you just hope he doesn't have much left to do.

[jupyt3r]

Black

Gale stinks. Astarion wonders if he might be turning.

--

The bestial hunger growls through the psionic link Gale has opened between them, threatening to make its way out. Astarion gasps and forces his hand away, severing the connection. He's left heaving as the black mark on Gale's skin dims.

It's bloodlust. The ebony shadow of Karsus's failed apotheosis looms thick and heavy and bitter on his tongue as the air rips its way down his throat. He knows that feeling. It's bloodlust.

Gale's presence is a black shadow curling over his nostrils, that rancid scent permeating everything. Burnt cardamom and woody smoke; something that may have once had warm and toasty notes but is now nothing short of acrid. It overpowers even the smoke from the campfire the wizard leans over, as well as the scent of whatever slop he's fussing over in the pot. Astarion can't help but twitch his upper lip towards his nose in disgust, and Gale happens to catch his eye in that moment.

“Yes, well. I suppose I now know why you've been avoiding my cooking. Suffice to say, I was a little bit offended, so I'm happy to know it's a matter of biology rather than taste.”

He's completely misinterpreted the expression. Which, Astarion supposes, is fair given that humans are more often smelling food rather than blood, and because Astarion's vampiric tastes are likely top of mind for everyone tonight. The open wounds on Tav’s neck this morning had made it a little bit difficult to keep that particular detail under wraps any longer, but he doesn't regret it for a second. He's never felt better.

“Gale, my dear, you wouldn't know taste if it knocked you over the head.”

An irksome smile wrinkles his eyes. "I really don't think you're in any position to be throwing stones on the matter.”

And he's not, but he's in a good mood, so he lets the comment slide. He would be in a better mood if he wasn't drowning in the wizard’s stench, though. After the blood– that delectable, velvety nectar of life– everything is oversaturated. Scents are brighter, more vivid, and sounds are as if he'd unstuffed balls of cotton from his ears that he hadn't even known were there. He can see every pore and pockmark in Gale's skin. Not to mention the improvement to his reflexes in combat– he's nigh unstoppable. But he's also never noticed this smell as strongly before.

Is he… turning? Gale is the only human among them, so perhaps his body is simply more susceptible to the parasite. How long until the rest of them will go? The others are gathered nearby, hungrily awaiting the dubious mush bubbling over the flames; it may not be a good time to broach the subject. But later, when the rest have settled in for the evening, Astarion will get to the bottom of it.

—

He melts out of the shadows around Gale’s tent. The wizard is laying back against the pillow, reading by the light of a small, hovering flame.

“What's wrong with you?" Astarion's whisper slices from the darkness.

Gale jumps, sucking in a breath and flipping onto his stomach, fingers crackling with a defensive spell. When he sees it's Astarion, he seems a bit reluctant to let the magic fizzle out, but does so nonetheless. "Mystra's sake, Astarion, don't sneak up on me like that. I'm afraid if you're looking for a nightcap, you'll find I'm not quite as generous as Tav,” he says, rising and placing a hand over his heart, which is hammering quite loudly.

“Ugh. Trust me when I say that is the last thing I want from you. Gale, your blood is positively vile smelling. Again, what's wrong with you?”

Gale looks taken aback, as if he's unsure whether to be more offended by the accusation that he smells or that something's wrong with him. "I- I’m afraid I don't know what you mean,” he lies. “Hang on– you can smell my blood?”

“You're sick. Or something. It's not normal. Is that parasite of yours gearing up to worm its way out by explosive means? You owe us a warning before we find ourselves with a Mind-flayer in our midst." Astarion's hand comes to rest on the hilt of the dagger at his hip. “I'll make it quick."

Gale's hands fly up in a placating gesture, and he takes a step back. "No, no no! It's not that. I swear to you, it's not that.”

“But you do know what it is, then?" Astarion's eyes narrow as he recognizes that something's being kept from him. He resolves to expose this liability before it has a chance to become a threat. If the wizard can't be relied upon, let that knowledge come sooner rather than later.

“Yes," Gale admits, “but I do think that particular course of conversation is one best left alone. For now, at least. I ask that you simply trust that I am aware of my condition and I am managing it, so you needn't worry yourself." A smile surfaces on his mouth, but it's hollow.

"If you're going to faint on us mid-battle one day and require that we drag your sorry self to safety, then I think I have a right to know. We can't afford secrets like that if we're going to make it out of this alive.”

"Oh, that is rich!” Gale laughs. "Coming from someone who hasn't told us for the last tenday that we've been traveling, sleeping, with a vampire! You're one to talk about secrets.”

Astarion flounders. "I– that's different. Vampire spawn, by the way. And do you think any of you would have allowed me to stay if I had told you that on day one? Of course not. I had to keep my best interests at heart. I didn't even really mean for Tav to find out, but at least my raffish charm and good looks have had time to work their magic so I didn't end up with a blade in my chest."

He realizes then– Gale's the same. No, not the raffish charm and good looks, but he's keeping the details of his condition close to heart not because he's private, but because, like Astarion, he poses a risk to the group, yet can't afford to be exiled. He's dangerous, somehow.

"You didn't mean for Tav to find out? You were going to– what, take a bite and hope for the best that they didn't–”

"Quiet,” Astarion interrupts. "You're deflecting. How about this: you tell me a little more about whatever's putrefying your veins and let me make the risk assessment for myself, or I can simply let the others know how concerned I am for our dear magical friend who smells like he might be ill. I'm sure Lae'zel will be patient with you if she suspects you're becoming ghaik." He smirks upon seeing Gale's expression of embittered resignation.

“Alright, alright,” he relents harshly, glancing around nervously as if their camp mates could have been roused by the mere threat. "You win. But please, keep in mind that I've been open-minded about your circumstances, so I ask for the same grace to be returned to me.” Gale looks to the stars, a wistful look falling over his face.”I'm going to tell you a story. It is the story of a man– a man who fell in love with a goddess.”

Astarion rolls his eyes. "I love a good drama as much as the next man, but please, can we skip the exposition? I don't think I can bear to hear the details of your… romantic exploits.”

Gale hardens, clearly upset at being robbed of the chance to monologue. “Fine. Have it your way. My goddess, Mystra, is more than simply the object of my faith– she is the object of my affection; and I, hers. Or at least I was. I was her chosen, and she unveiled to me the secrets of the universe. I only sought to return something to her that she had lost. But I… miscalculated. If you're insistent upon the abridged tale, the short of it is that a fragment of the very Weave itself, sealed during the fall of Netheril, now resides within me.”

"What in the hells does that mean?” Astarion deadpans.

"Are you familiar with the tale of Karsus’s Folly?”

“Who?"

“Good gods. The empire of Netheril?"

“Vaguely? Ancient, floating cities. What's that got to do with your… problem?”

“Well, I'd gladly give you a history lesson, but since you're impatient to get to the heart of the issue, how about we just–” Gale reaches out and grabs his hand, pulling it in towards his chest. Astarion tries to flinch from his grasp, but his fingers graze the wizard's skin and–

I'm going to give the tome to Mystra, adorn her with this sealed specimen of primal magic. I'll prove my value to her, be more worthy than a simple mortal consort. But… its secrets are alluring. Surely a peek won't do any harm. I open the forbidden tome, the archaic pages vibrating with the promise of the arcane. Something dark and hungry bursts from the parchment, clawing at my connection to the Weave, clawing at me. It's eating me from the inside out. I have to sate it, or it will escape, I have to–

The bestial hunger growls through the psionic link Gale has opened between them, threatening to make its way out. Astarion gasps and forces his hand away, severing the connection. He's left heaving as the black mark on Gale's skin dims.

It's bloodlust. The ebony shadow of Karsus's failed apotheosis looms thick and heavy and bitter on his tongue as the air rips its way down his throat. He knows that feeling. It's bloodlust.

“That was– you can't let it– you have to–”

"As I said before, I have the situation under control.”

Astarion's still breathing hard, but his knife is at Gale's chest in an instant, directed at the center of the offending orb. "That did not feel like one iota of control,” he hisses. He knows control.

Gale goes stock-still beneath the tip of the blade. “You really don't want to do that," he warns, quietly, evenly.

“Give me one reason why I shouldn't take down that thing inside you with you as collateral."

“Because it wouldn't be just me that's collateral," he responds. “No matter how desperately I wish that were the case."

“Explain. No more secrets. And don't touch me again."

“I'm the only thing keeping this… Netherese Orb contained for the moment. If I were to die… I fear the ensuing eruption would level a city the size of Waterdeep. So, if you please, it would be in both of our best interests for you to lower your blade.”

Astarion lets the true magnitude of Gale's predicament sink in, feeling simultaneous relief that his own secret was not the most dangerous one among the group by far, and fear for the numerous threats to their lives which could now spell disaster for countless others. He lowers the knife. “How, exactly, do you plan to prevent that from happening?"

“It can be stabilized, for a time, by absorbing raw pieces of the Weave. The most convenient source, I've found, is potent magical items. The enchantments are enough for it to lay dormant for a while."

“That did not feel dormant."

*Well,” Gale hesitates, "it's… awakening. You see, I haven't absorbed any magic since before the abduction. I imagine that's why it has a more potent… odor, to you. Although I'd really like to learn more about that, if you'd oblige me, the thought that magic has a smell–”

"Is not important. Just how long until you can't contain it anymore?”

"I don't know, exactly. I'm making it a priority to locate a suitable artifact as quick as I can. As I said before, I am managing it. You really needn't worry yourself. This is why I didn't want to tell anyone; that, and to avoid exactly the stunt you pulled with that knife.”

Astarion scoffs, rolling the knife between his fingers before sheathing it. “Oh, come now. You can't say you blame me for that. Next time, perhaps it's better to start off with I am quite literally a walking bomb so please don't kill me and therefore yourself and anyone in the surrounding area. Then you can talk about lovemaking with the divine, or whatever you were prattling about."

“I'm hoping there won't be a next time." Gale meets his eyes earnestly, and Astarion realizes he's being asked to keep a secret. His first instinct is to be spiteful, to retaliate for the extremely pertinent information that was kept from him, but Gale's secret feels… all too familiar. The serendipity of Tav's defense of his vampirism this morning is fresh in his mind, and despite his better impulses, he decides that Gale could use someone in his corner, too. More importantly, secrets are part of his allure of mystery, and as of today he's down one secret, so he sees no harm in replacing it with a new one. He tucks Gale's secret right in with the rest of his arsenal. It’s delicious to have leverage.

“Very well," he acquiesces, “but only so long as you are able to feed it. I don't intend to go out in a blaze of… whatever that is."

Gale sighs in relief, laying a hand over the mark. “Thank you, Astarion. Truly. On Mystra's honor, I'll keep it sated."

Astarion sits, uninvited, on Gale's cushion and uncorks a bottle of his wine. "Why doesn't Mystra just solve your little problem for you, if she's so fond of you?”

Gale eyes the invasion of his space warily, but falls cross-legged to the rug across from him. “By opening that book, I'd… flown too close to the sun, so to speak. I'd crossed a boundary that she could not forgive. She cast me out. And this… thing in my chest consumed the power I've spent my entire life honing. I'm no longer her chosen."

He looks away, his voice entirely absent of its usual confidence. Astarion takes a pull of the wine and screws his face up, his palette tainted by the previous night's indulgence. "And now you're just like the rest of us. I can't say I have much sympathy.”

“It wouldn't hurt you to try."

“I think it might, actually," Astarion muses. “The gods have shown themselves to be rather indifferent to my plight."

He looks as though he's suddenly very interested in whatever's happening to the cuticle of his second finger, if only to hide the rage that's begun to seethe beneath his skin. The gall to complain to him, of all people, about having lost the gods’ favor. At least Gale had had it to begin with. Astarion had lost count of the number of gods he'd prayed to as he lay, beaten and bleeding, at Cazador's feet. It's been a long time since he stopped; the last of his prayers had been to the god of death, and that, too, had gone unanswered.

"And what plight might that be? A shortage of plump necks to puncture, or perhaps a lack of hair gel?" Gale remarks flippantly, ignorant to the thin sheet of ice upon which he's tread.

“Don't presume to know me, Gale of Waterdeep,” he warns in a low tone. "We've all got our demons. Mine just so happen not to be as odorous as yours."

“Well," Gale says, sobered, his eyes probing analytically at Astarion's well-masked expression. “And here I thought that being a vampire would have been your deepest secret."

“Do you think me so shallow? I'm hurt," he responds with forced levity. “But we've disclosed quite enough to each other for one day, don't you think?”

"Couldn't agree more,” Gale drawls, his gaze lingering for a moment longer.

“I'll leave you to your reading, then. Do us all a favor and try not to explode tonight. Your fragment felt… hungry.” He picks himself up and dusts himself off, beginning to head towards his own tent.

"Astarion?”

"Hm?” He turns to look over his shoulder.

"Say the gods weren't indifferent. If they could grant you one request, what would you ask for?”

That's an easy question. "Power.”

"Funny,” the wizard answers, a smile on his lips, "I would say the same thing.”

Later that night, long after everyone's gone to sleep, Astarion tells himself that it's only some misplaced sense of pity that brings him to Tav’s tent, rifling through their bags. His fingers graze the prize, and he pulls it out to gleam beneath the moonlight; a locket, given in thanks for the safe return of one of the tiefling children. It’s enchanted to produce a small halo of dancing lights. Yes, it's pity, and nothing more, when he creeps through the darkness and lays the necklace at the threshold of the wizard's tent. And it will be pity (and fear) when, days later, a shade delivers the instructions for a timely resurrection, and Astarion follows each one to the letter. Pity when he tells him that the goddess of magic can fuck herself before demanding something so unthinkable. Nothing more.

[morlock-holmes]

Gonna try to Steel-man the whole “ Star-dew valley is satisfying an inherently conservative fantasy” as someone who sort of agrees but not strongly and doesn’t care particularly much

The game is fundamentally around the idea of a single person ( and eventually there spouse), managing a substantial plot of agricultural land they have private control over alone, I can’t underestimate how /unusual/ this is as a mechanism of food production, typically pre-industrial societies functioned with a large patch of agricultural land that was managed communally by the entire village, the area of which in practice probably was owned by some lord, but who wasn’t really involved , this was particularly true in rice based societies where the gains to be made via working together to terraform the landscape for irrigation were greatest, but It was the norm in say, wheat based midevil Europe as well, the Idea of a “ Family farm”, of a quaint small, but substantially large, plot of land managed and controlled and privately owned by a single family for agriculture , Is an incredibly Recent and American phenomena, one only possible do to low population densities in the areas being colonized via mass genocide of native Americans, and they’re being a-lot of “ Terra Nulius” to divvy up into chunks, The Idea of The Homestead or Family farm is very heavily tied To American Imperialism And Genocide

( Ugh tumblr deleted this part: anyway It’s not directly related but I had an aside about how this method of agriculture can’t take advantage of economies of scale and is incredibly inefficient and impractical, which is part of why it has gradually been replaced with fewer larger industrial scale farms, that can have the same economies of scale the old village-farms did( and though automation has done a-lot for some crops like corn, for others like cucumbers they are heavily reliant on mass manual labor of many migrants, so for these sort of crops we have sort of moved back to the older “ lord owns a-lot of land, many laborers work together to tend it” (except these people are generally migrants traveling between different farms and not involved in decision making of how to farm) ( I also sort of suspect if American farmers in the late 18/early 1900’s were working together over larger areas of the landscape to irrigate and manage the land, the dustbowl would have not been as bad as it was, with individual farmers trying to maximize production in an individuals tiny chunks of land with basically no control over where the water goes)

Moving on from the innate connection of Family Farms to American imperialism and genocide, we can talk about the role/fantasy of the rural homestead in American patriotism and About the romanticization of rural life in general across conservative/fascist regimes in many countries in contrast to the more multicultural/ formally-educated /liberal cities, or we can talk about conservative doomsday preppers and the myth of individual self-sufficiency, and how the privately owned family-farm plays into that,

or switching subject matters a bit, how a game centered around the farming of livestock and the buying/selling of them and their products reinforces ideas of some sentient beings as less-then/commodities/existing to serve, especially with the humane-washing of these situations as happy or mutually beneficial that erases the existence of such creatures before humans and the innate violence of their subjugation.

There are premises here that I do not agree with.

First: The idea that since America was built on genocide of Native Americans, any fantasy rooted in American culture or norms is necessarily a fantasy of indulging in genocide.

That American small farms were built on genocide of native Americans does not demonstrate that the idea of a small family farm can exist only in such a case.

Like, flip it around, would you find it convincing if I argued that any fantasy of collective land ownership "sucked" because such things can only happen in communist countries, and therefore invoked the purges of Stalin and Mao?

This attitude would seem to rule out any fantasy rooted in actually existing society as inherently right-wing on the grounds that all existing earth societies have built themselves on atrocities.

Second, Preppers are right-wing, preppers believe in self-sufficiency, therefore fantasies of self-sufficiency are inherently right-wing.

I don't buy that thinking.

Preppers presumably fantasize about having sex with attractive people or falling in love; this does not make such fantasies inherently right-wing.

I get the to me disturbing sensation that certain people believe all fantasies of power or control to be right-wing. I find that disturbing, to be honest; individual control, the ability to make certain decisions even in the face of opposition from others, is a very important thing for people. I don't trust a political philosophy which only allows collective decision-making.

[heich0e]

been writing something that has actually become something for once and i just wanna show it to someone eventually but i have like no friends on here and im scared ill post it and it will just go unread UGH how do u deal with that like how did you go about posting your writing for the first time

hi friend!! this is so exciting!! i'll be honest, this is sort of a loaded question—and i have a pragmatic somewhat callous answer AND an empathetic one that both exist at the same time and aren't mutually exclusive.

the reality is: when you post the thing that you've been working on, and that you're proud of, people might not read it. or less people may read it than the amount of pride you feel for it seems to deserve. and that sucks, it really really does, but it could happen. no one HAS to read what anyone writes, and it's hard for new writers/new fics to break through the very saturated landscape of fan created content to find the right audience. that doesn't mean it's impossible, or not worth doing, but it's important going into it that you don't tie the value of your art to the number of eyes that see it. it's worth something because it's yours!!

my second answer is that it's not wrong to want to share the thing you made with other people. it's not wrong or selfish to want other people to like it and tell you why they like it, or to use your art as a catalyst to connect with people. art has always been a very social part of human existence. it's something that was largely always meant to be shared. i've written fic for a long time but never posted it because it was just a silly thing i would do in my spare time because i had stories i wanted to put into words. when i did post my first fic, i didn't have any kind of community/following that i expected to support it. i just did it because i liked what i was writing, and thought maybe other people would like it too. but i didn't write it for the PURPOSE of people reading it, if that makes sense. i'm not a blueprint or an expert or qualified to give advice, but i think this worked for me. i didn't post it because i expected or needed people to read it, but rather i hoped they would. i think if you write something because you're passionate about it, and at the end of the day you're reconciled to the reality that it might take time for people to find it (if at all,) it will all work out. but please don't get discouraged if it's not what you expected—keep writing, and growing, and sharing for your own sake.

sorry if this is a disaster answer, i don't quite know how to express what i'm trying to say here. creating art (of any kind) is a very personal and vulnerable thing, and i truly hope from the bottom of my heart that if this is something you love and are proud of that it works out for you—whatever that might mean.

[kaleidosouls]

random text post of day #

been watching creepcast more or less since the first/second episode and after latest i keep wanting to talk to ppl abt my thoughts and im tired of trying to engage with other youtube comments / i dont wanna keep bothering my spouse with this plus id want to talk to other ppl who are viewers but dhkdhfk im gonna rant behind the cut; tw animal death/violence, child abuse

gonna rant assuming readers is also a viewer cause too tired to explain, sorry. this is just “stuff id want to chat with fellow fans of the poscast but i dont have friends who watch it, and the youtube comments suck for the most part and id rather be turned inside out than login to reddit”, like i did end up using rhe comment section way toomuch already, jm tired and its like 3% normal ppl and 97% dicks and assholes with bully disorder

like it was a big enlightening to just properly label things last night at last and process the feelings and situation. this is jsut a podcast with isaiah bullying his cohost hunter (“as a joke”) and the fans at large are people who enjoying bullying snd find it funny, and try to bully commenters who disrupt their “fun”, trting to discret and demean them as friendless parasocial losers for not playing along the theater of mockery and treating it as socially acceptable.

like its one thing to tease between friends and make dark jokes, its another thing to repeatedly, insistently, laugh at your friend for being traumatized as a child by violent animal death? like. its like i get that initially he was just really baffled at the event like haha oh my god did that happened thats so fucked up (which is annoyingly normie in its own way like yeah dude, none of us have control over fucked up shit happening to us as children, like he makes such a spectacle about it like its this earth shattering thing). like its tragic and a big deal but like wrt trauma its usually safe to be on the level that the person with the trauma is setting, if theyre talkinf about it really intensely it makes sense to match up to that tone or lower. instead hunter is trting to move on while isaiah is just obsessed fascinated with it like its fiction almsot. idk just . uggghhhhhhh

i could kust make a collage fo commwnts that made me like lose hope for humanity each time but i dontw anna dwell on annoying bullshit and commit it more to memory. like people are jusr… like there is some dark humor inherent to like calljng your mom as an adult on your show to have her back you up only for it to turn out it was way worse, but like the way isaiah kept laughing about it for so long.. like hecan laugh and joke like that at his Own traumas if he has them. just. idk. tgisn podcast like just. ugh its making me irritated tot hink abt explaining whats happening in it to people like go watch it with adblock on, im gonnaskip explainjng more and jsut say some feelings to the void that id rather like scream at someone about. i was gonna say scream at assholes in the commmebts but i actually want their internet connection destroted and for them to be forced to dismantle their phones and pcs and set them on fire so they can never speak again.

isaiah is coming off like such a monster. like, “””as a joke””” acting like an asshole is still acting like an asshole, i dont care anymore that hes actually probably rly well intentioned and ncie bc he jsut needs to stop being fucking rancid and a shitty cohost and friend. an honestly i cant even believe the “hes actually nice” shit anymore. starting tj feel hes been an ashsole all along and just pretends to be a good guy. like he takes too much joy out of excessive bullying to be a good person. like genuine just bullying, with no consequences. ppl are like “oh hunters fine with it bc hes putting up with it” like as if every single person alive Never has to put up and laugh along shit that bothers them. specially on what is essentially their Job. hunter barely appears comfortable and he does not dish back nearly as viciously- and we jnow hes capable of rly dark humor and banter too, on his own channel tje vibe is completely different but he has none or that edge with isaiah. while isaiah is literally like i wnan dox you please fans m*lest hunter in the meet and greet, i want this guy dead; isaiah literlaly makea such a huge deal every time hunter had a disagreeing opinion irs clear hes started to just not weight in when he doesnt like something, itd be one thing to make these super intense mean comments if hunter did them back but every time isaiah would not take or tolerate it when it was towards himself,; and honestly all of the stuff before had been like accumulating to be pretty bad but rhe latest ep with the dog story eallyi guess like crosses a line of like, this is just genuinely wrong and i dont care how mcuh the comments say its ‘parasocial’to have basic human empathy! youre watchint a guy talk abt having the family dog shot in the back of the head in front of him by his grandfather, only to then find out on air feom his mother the shooting had been intentional and his grandfatehr was actuallt a monster instead of a disabled man traumatizinf you by accident. like the ironic tragedy of him calling his mom to back him up on that ‘its not a big deal’ only for her to contradict him is funny on a cosmic sense, but like it is iust. not that funny dude. like isaiah kept bursting into laughter just thinking about it. oh is it too absurd for you to take seriously? do yoh just not give a fuck about how tour friend might feel? dude didnt even fucking ask. he didnt eveb show a sliver of care , sympathy empathy anything. he literally says “ill never let you live this down”. LIVE WHAT DOWN???? having his grandfather intentionally shoot his dog in front of him as a 7 year old child? like what the actual fuck is wrong with him??!! have like even a shred of respect for your cohost, like its all ‘as a joke’ but if you consistently ‘as a joke’ act like a cruel manipulative bullying person, im just gonna choose to believe youre actually just that person using “humor” as a shield to excuse your behavior.

like wtf. i was actually a fan of isaiahs chanel first and i didnt rly vibe with hunter that much and i wouldnt have expected, bc i woildnt enjoy watching an asshole, that isaiah wouldve turned out to be such a self centered horrible person. like its all funny TO HIM, i dont get the sense its enjoyable at all to be in that room when isaiah is getting all giddy and having a kick out of treating hunter like a punching back. yeah he probably doesnt mean to be actually hurtful but it doesnt look like the thought even crosses his satan spawn eyes that someone could have a different reaction than the one he was intends there to be. like i dont know hunter and idk if id even like him if i talked to him in person but it sucks qnr is horrible to watch anyone be treated that way consistently. like i wish creepcaet juet actually ended or isaiah learned how to not be shitty. i dont care if its not in his nature to not be awful he should just try to pretend to be a decent person for once. like i feel bad for hunter becuase it comes across like hes more stuck in the podcast than enjoying it and i empathise with struggling to leave “friends” who treat you like shit. and its like work too, i have no idea how much of a monetary and reputation loss it would be to leave. ppl are like “theyre adults they surely worked within themselves” yeah bc no adult ever has struggled or been stuck in a situation thats hard to get out of. honestly like yeah this is just a shitty podcast with shitty fans who just enjoy watching a bigger guy get bullied for no reason because they are probably mostly awful bullies in their own lives too hurting the people around them and i dont need to convern myself over what people who get a kick out of hurting others think.

i guess obligatory like. insane and unwarranted comment to the hosts bc no one is readingnthis let alone either of them but its like what if they read it and like felt x or y way in reaction. maube writing this will give me some semblance of peace

@ hunter: you seem cool and youre a really talented artist and naturally funny on camera/audio. i relate to having memories from childhood warped like that, and im sure/i would imagine that was the story told because it was far from the actual worst one. i think you deserve to respect yourself more, im sure being bullied is no skin of your back, im fat and ive been derided bc of it my whole life, from since i was 70kg and im 100kg now. its smth you get used to and it feels like not a big deal but on a fundamental level i thibk everyone deserves to respect themselves at least enough to not let friends treat you like shit to this extent. like i know banter and teasing is normal, butlike. its so excessive dude. it comes across like youre just stuck there and idk your financials and maybe you coulr be, ive heard of stories like that wrt youtube projects, and subversive animations arent loved by youtube’s revenue. heavy condolences if this turns out to be the case and hoping things can change. im sure it would be hard to quit anyway bc ppl would make such a big deal abt it. but if you are free to leave at anytime and you have freedom and are safe with isaiah,thank god thats great, get the FUCK out of there or get isaiah to stop treatiny you like shit cause you deserve better. if somehow you iust love beint berated like that i guess like each to his own too, i just hope youre doing ok juwt oj the basis of beint a fellow human being who appears to be in a legitimately shitty situation. if you are ajd im insane, thats fine too, id rather be insane than someone be suffering.

sigh

@ isaiah: i really liked your youtube vids. you seemed like a decent enougu guy. ofc like i dont actualyl Know either of tou, injust am human and relating on basic emotional levels based on the behavior you choose to display online. man. what the hell is wrong with you? if i expected you to actually read this i would be more polite but i dont expect a single soul to read this, really. like, man… i want to believe theres capacity of good and kindness in every person so surely you must have it, and if you do.. why are you acting like that. is being mean That funny? i love dark humor but ive never taken joy out of actively bullying people so i cant really relate but like, surely you can find otuer ways to have fun with your friend? im sure you think its all fine bc hunter wont throw a tantrum like you do but some people are actually way more inwards with their emotions and like you coild try to be a little more interested in how someone else feels when you bully them. “as a joke”. like maybe its not as funny as you think itnis, or they migut not be enjoying it like you do. i know its hard to stop when you want to talk but please try to stop interrupting hunter repeatedly after you clewrly mustve heard him adter the call delay? honestly, i thought you were a fine guy but now its like maybe youre just on a power trip, havint someone hostage to validate your opinions on horror and to bully for fun who wont talk back to you in a way thats actually challenging. since you love the sounf of your own voice so much you could do a solo podcast, you dont need hunter to be there as a punching bag in order to make a podcast. if you lvoe and care about hunter as a friend sincerely and iust have been totally by accident actint like a major piece of shit, id like want to hope for you to improve as a person in how you act and id want to believe thats very possible, but episode after episode its just.. like i dont give a shit abt dark mean humor i dont care if you call us in the audience pieces of shit or freaks or whatever, we’re not there talking to you, but hunter Is hearing what youre saying and is actually there.like id say for a christian you are extremely cruel but that is just ao on brand for open christians to behave that way that i honestly wanted to believe you would subvert that expectation, but it seems i was wrong. you know like i dont get this being mean as a joke thinf and neber have, i would say if hunter died tomorrow would you not have rather spent time with him in a positive way where he was loved instead of berated, but youd most likely “joke” that youre glad hes dead and that you didnt bully him enough. im not christian and i dont believe in heaven or hell but i know for you that youre most likely not seeing the pearly gates until you learn to pretend to be a good person to your friends. its probably not even smth you genuinely want to do or care to do but you could make that sacrifice of being nicer so the world is a better place while it has to have you here.

big sigh this isjsut hggggghhhhhh like a shame bc i love horror and i had enjoyed isaiahs youtube vids but , man this is such a disappointment. obviously i dont rly wana watch the podcast anymore butni like hunter reading and his voice and i would just hope for the best for him going forward, and the insane in my brain is like i gotta check it out maybe isaiah apologizes and acts like normal and nice without being rancid for once. even tho i know that wont be true bc it hasnt been for weeks since i started watching, i guess ill tune in for the next and if he foesnt shape up i’ll quit it. find a diff horror podcast or smth. makes me sad imagining hunter stuck in there. kike idk if hes even a good person like hes edgy on his own channel too but in general like he comes across like isaiah used to , lile someone who just seems fine and i havent heard anything saying theres smth horribly wrong with him. just on a basic human level it sucks to see people struggle and suffer. speciallt when its situations i relate and have been to. its been at least (uhh math…) damn 10 years or smth since an event that really stuck with me, where i was kust telling soem school friend abt my life at home bc we were just talking, and i relayed one of the ways my parents would beat me and how i was so scary, and she burst our cackling in my face. its a feeling that took a long time to stop having it sting in my head. she wasnt intending to laugh At me, or bc she thought beating children was genuinely good or funny, but to her the situation was so absurd it was funny. i can understand that on a detached level like if it wasnt real there would be some comedy timing to it. but instead i iust felt like a joke. like i was stupid, like it was this really funny ass thing, and i tried to play along, and it was like the fear trauma and pain that resulted from those events was a joke too. like i was stupid for having my life warped ny the abuse and it affecting me, because it was just so absurd and funny! like damn, i shouldve been abused as a child in a less absurd and funny way so people wouldnt mock me to my face about it. i guess i deserve it and its natural to be treated this way. until i met someoje who actually respected and gave a fuck about me and wouldnt make me feel that way i thoight it was normal and like i was fine with it too. i used to get bullied communally by my entire classroom for half of middle school and i thought those people were called friends too because id never been treated any better by anyone.

hgggghj i think its helped a bit to get it off my chest, maybe. man this sucks. i wish people would iust be nicer to eachother. life is so short, and some people cant even have the courtesy to not be tormented by people they call friends

[stevie-petey]

GOD the last chapter was so so heartbreaking to read :( bug just wants steve to live his own life without dragging him with her to college in fear of it being the cause of their relationships downfall in the future UGHH and max and bugs sisterhood will never not make me cry they’re just so alike that it actually scares me bc they’re both willing to do anything to protect those around them (and are both stubborn about it!!) i don’t even know where to begin with dustins crying 😭😭 he’s forever bugs baby brother!! i love how even if they’re going thru a rough patch as siblings they still care for eachother just as much if not more now that they’re aware of what’s happening in hawkins <3 robin is still hawkins #1 bae like if no one’s gonna take her out Ik here im ready please give me a chance!! sorry vickie! (sorry i just had to share my thoughts about rob) AND IM WISHING EDDIE STRENGTH FOR WHATS ABOUT TO COME oh btw nance and bug?? i love these two so much!! and i love how instead of creating a big fight over jealousy between the two girls we got them as supportive gfs who literally praises eachother everytime <3 my adhd is so bad excuse this very very long anon letter

but yeah jonathan..ily but not on my watch….you leave bug and steve alone okay? please and ty <3 btw i hope school is going okay for u!! sending love  x 

-a very very stressed anon (leaving this strawberry & star cuz ik i’ll send more rants soon! 🌟🍓)

every time i watch season 4 im just like damn rip eddie u didnt stand a chance. poor lad.

but YES bug n max <333 theyve always had a cute lil connection so them fighting literal demons together seemed very fitting. same for nance and bug, i see them all on the same wavelength of "we all mutually respect each other even though we are lowkey too similar to get along"

now max and bug both willing to die for their loved ones ,,,, oh just u wait <3

steve and bug :(( their first real fight and its about literally spending the rest of their lives together. very typical of them tbh. sucks that trauma is preventing this from happening rip.

and DUSTIN !!! man i love complex sibling relations ugh when theyre flawed its so <333 like yes !! be human !! hurt each other !!

[diddlesanddoodles]

As a small thank you to everyone who has ever read or suported me or my work, I'd like to present a small snippet from the Dumpling rewrite.

"The Uphill River"

An Excerpt from Chapter 7

She had wondered all day where her shoes had gotten to, but she could not care less of the worn slippers. Though the parchment map was mostly intact, the ink was terribly faded and there was a large rip in the corner that extended through the blackwoods and several of the small town names were completly illegible. Clearly it had been washed with her clothes.

Nenani stared miserbly and could feel all hope of finding her uncle slipping through her fingers. She laid it flat onto the table with trembling hands and pointed to where the Daehil-Nenani river began its winding path southward. “I was going here…to Creekbend. A-and then…I was gonna go and maybe look around… these towns.”

Farris hummed as he leaned over her, looking at the map. He frowned. “I’m afraid yer map’s no good, lil’un.”

“No, it’s fine. I can still read most of it.” It was hard to tell if she was trying to convince Farris or herself.

“Not what I meant,” he said and swept a finger across the tiny map. “Those little towns there at the base of the Blackwood? Those were all raided and destroyed during the war. None of them exist anymore.”

“W-what?” She wheeled on him. “No! Why? What?”

“Nethrin burned every one of those lil' towns to the ground. If there’s anyone there now, ye want nothing to do with them. It’s not a place for a lil’ girl to be wandering around by herself.”

Nenani continued to stare unblinking at the map, feeling her insides pull and push with growing nausea. “But she said that’s where he would be,” she said in a voice barely above a whisper. “She said…”

“Who said?”

“…the witch.”

“Witch?” Farris asked, eyes narrowing. “What witch?”

“The bone witch. She…she said he went north and he was waiting for me to find him,” Nenani starred at the map as the features blurred behind the gathering tears.

“Bone witch?” he repeated with growing incredulity. “Ye mean to tell me that ye risked yer damn life on nothing but the words of some raging nutter off her head waving pig bones at ye?”

His words hurt more than anything as she came to the slow horrible realization of just how true they were. She had been so desperate for anything that would lead her to Halden, that she would have willfully believed anything. Halden was her last connection to her family and happier times. But he could be anywhere in the world.

“She tricked me,” Nenani said after a long silence. She wiped at her wet cheeks. Her throat ached and the words felt too heavy to push passed her lips. “I was just trying to find him. He promised. He promised me he would come back…but he never did. He promised me.” Her hands clenched and the parchment beneath her fingers crumbled. She had been such a fool. And now she was leagues away from anywhere close to familiar, alone, and at the mercy of a giant from whom she had stolen from. It was the cruelest of jokes and she cursed whichever gods were laughing at her misery. She sucked in a shuddering breath and lifted her head to meet Farris’s hard gaze. “I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. Please believe me.”

Farris pursed his lips as though holding back what he truly wished to say. Instead, he idly swirled the hot tea in his cup and took the human sized one into his palm. With surprising deftness, he tipped some of the steaming liquid into it without spilling a drop. “I believe ye, Dumplin’,” he said gently and held out to her. “Drink. It’ll help.”

She didn’t bother questioning him and simply took the cup, mechanically raising it to her lips and taking the tiniest of sips. She reared back with a grimace. “Ugh! Oh, what is this?”

With a suppressed grin, Farris shrugged and took a drink from his own cup. “Tea.”

She stared at the dark liquid with uncertainty. It was sour and heavily medicinal and though it did not carry the pungent and bitter quality of pure cayne leaf he'd fed her before, it was not very pleasant. And was oddly minty.

“Honey helps,” Farris remarked with a chuckle and went to fetch some. “Have to make it sweet for the brat too just to get him to take it at all. I suppose ye’ll be much the same.”

Honey did help somewhat, but not enough to entice her to try for another sip. Farris did not seem to have any sort of objection to the taste and drank his as easily as if it plain water. With her cup still mostly full, Nenani gazed woefully up at him. “Do…do I have to drink it all?”

She had expected him to growl at her, but he just nudged her shoulder gently with a knuckle. “It helps settle a fidgety mind.”

“I don’t have a fidgety mind.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Dumplin’, everything about ye is fidgety. Drink.” She could not bring herself to drink anymore and just stared down at it glumly, tipping the cup this way and that. Farris frowned and sighed through his nose. “Tell ye what. I know the head of a collection of human villages not too far from here. They get their fair share of wayward wanderers and lost souls. I’ll send him a letter asking if he might know of this uncle of yer’s. If he’s been by this way within the last year or so, Gregis would be the one to know. Might even be able to tell us where he is.”

Nenani nearly dropped the cup as she scrambled to her feet clumsily with wide hopeful eyes. “What? You do? Where? When? Can you send the letter now? Can we go there?”

Nenani’s mind raced and she started to look around for a way down off the table; filled with undirected energy and still clutching the cup of tea in both hands. “I know my letters, I can help write it too!”

Two calloused hands reached out to hold her bodily in place and she began to push against them, but stopped when she caught sight of Farris’s stern expression.

“Fidgety,” he said pointedly.

[fandomfluffandfuck]

hi S ok you definitely dont have to answer this bc its basically just me venting and its pretty lame haha but im curious if its something you've ever dealt with or if u have advice... basically i have diagnosed ASD and marvel is my special interest and has been since i was a kid and im pretty positive its going to stay my favorite thing for the rest of my life lol. and sometimes i get so sooo sad and kinda lonely thinking about the fact that like .. i know its basically still one of the biggest fandoms out there but like all my favorite fics were posted like 5-10 years ago mostly from authors that arent even in the fandom anymore and theres never gonna be another movie with steve and bucky together that everyone gets excited about and wants to talk about and theres also just so much less of a fun goofy little tight knit community for stucky on tumblr and online like ... idk i just miss so bad when the mcu was at its peak and there was so much content to consume and so many people passionate about it... and i know theres definitely still a huge presence and like im so thankful that youre an author that i love thats still super active and im always glad to visit your page and to see that theres still so many fans out there that care and wanna interact yknow. but tumblrs different now and its been like ten years since peak stucky content and the actors are all doing their own thing now idk it just makes me sad 😩😩 i feel like such a loser saying it i swear i have other interests and an irl life that is very fruitful and lovely hahaha its just makes me a bit frustrated at my autism because i know i wont be able to ever really stop loving these characters even as others move on

Hey, sweets!

I understand what you mean and you're not a loser, not at all. It's fucking great to have an interest in something, anything--what else is life for? You gotta have something to be focused on and interested in that gives you joy, otherwise, what is there? Just blandness. And, yeah, Marvel fandom is still very much active and that's wonderful and great! But, it's also true that it will never be the same as it was in its heyday. Personally, I wasn't around when the stucky fandom was exploding along the release of CA:TWS/the general MCU height, but I certainly see all the old art, edits, cosplay, etc. that's still reblogged and I've read so many of the fics from years prior, so I have a grasp of what was happening. And I can totally see how you'd miss generally, but especially if your fixation has attached deeply to these characters.

I have a sibling on the autism spectrum (who's old enough to have been diagnosed with Aspergers's syndrome before that was phased out but they are, of course, on the spectrum regardless of arbitrary hierarchical labels that I will restrain from ranting about because I fucking hate that shit, don't talk to me about "high functioning" ugh) and they have a few different life-long hyperfixations as well. So, you're not alone, but, it is hard to think of any actual advice per se. I think you're already doing what you need to be doing, y'know? You're here and enjoying what is going on now, connecting to blogs that are active, finding space where you can talk about these characters, you've got other things to do that also capture your attention, and, of course, you know you're sad about what isn't going on anymore. It's okay to be sad. You can't control what you're passionate about in the same way you can't control who you fall in love with. Are these silly little fictional characters not just people we've fallen in love with a little or a lot, no matter if they don't "exist"? I love that for us. Humans are so cute and full of love.

Fandoms and people change and sometimes it fucking sucks when it happens, sometimes it's great. Either way, it's part of the ecosystem of life. Water and nutrients and air and sun--it makes people change, it makes them grow, and you're allowed to be sad about what they used to be, you just have to keep growing, too. Remember what they were and know who they are now.

Hopefully, something in there helped you feel better, even if it was just from telling someone how you feel.