#ugh ANYWAY i have opinions on this woman clearly
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importantdestinydefendor · 4 months ago
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Chapter 130 rambles...
Okay, I stayed up late for this chapter so many of my first thoughts are gone, lost in the world of dreams, BUT I still want to try to form any coherant sentences.
Which is hard this chapter becaue when i read it my mind just goes blank. No thoughts behind those eyes lol. Warning: a lot of pictures!
Anyway (spoilers ahead! Read at own risk)
Possessed Innocentis still giving me the creeps eww
NOOOOO not the soldiers that guarded Innocentis!
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Like that we are still at the falling stage and have yet to hit the ground (this sounds horrible jesus)
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THE REACTIONS OF THE THREE samesies
The panel with the Lusitanian unifrom (is it a unifrom???) just haning there ragged - oof that was a red herring right there! I was convinced that something awful will happen to Estelle...
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Aaand we cut to this! The placment of the helmet! Their faces!
I will spare you the image of Innocentis and Amdragoras mangled bodies. @tired-reader-writer has it in their reaction post if anybody wants to see it.
The way Arslan reaches for the helmet! How we can't clearly tell if it is happiness (least likely - thats just not his character) or sadness (also not really likely in my opinion) or just pure shock (most likely)
okay, Elam calm thy self! Because if you say that now then it will most likely not happ-
aaaand I was right!
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Eww get back, get back, get back! Do NOT come ANY closer!
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The way Elam and Daryun immediatly get into action! Same, Alfarid, same!
~Andragoras, you are a hypocrate and delusional~ You were a shit king and your court was also full of shit. Being a king does not only require to be strong. Maybe you should have listend to Narsus instead of stroking your ego, ey?
Yes, Arslan! Tell him (again)! He will still not get it but tell him!
Oh eh, he-hello Tahamenay...
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Oh, why is that momet so fucking tender? It seems he did actually love her...?
Aaand it is over... serves you right, Andycakes!
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Love Tahamenays face here. The pure desperation and hatred...
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I also like that he slowly excepts his demise and hugs her one last time before dying... Ugh I am a sucker for tragic romances (here one sided though) and the last hug... GAH
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The faces of everyone! Alafrid is me through out this entire chapter for real!
Ugh Tahamenay! I have never fell more roller coaster feelings for this woman since her talk with Arslan! You are now free!
Estelle!!!!! No baby don't falter now!
Alafriiiid! My baby, my cutie! I will die for youuuu!!!! (I will put you through so much shit in my AU, I am sorry)
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This panel... It makes me feel so dejected...
The citizens stopping Estelle... There is noboy at fault (except the racism against Jaswant. Not cool, guys!)
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FARANGIIIIS! My queen to the resque!
The way my heart sank when Estelle opened the door and there was nobody...
And they were save afterall! Thank you, three boys whos names I forgot (sorry)
Oh the news are spreading like wildfire!
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Love the different reaction shots! And the diferent levels of emotions! (also side note: Zandeh looks really good here...)
aaand here we go! Straight to hell... here I had hoped that we get at least a little breather...
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FUCK NO! GET THAT THING AWAY FROM ISFANT AND KUBARD!
That is NOT Shapur, you two! RUN!
I had such a jumpscare. I was awake and tired at the same time.
No thoughts about my AU this time. Maybe some reaction scenes from Farzin and his army? Will defenitly wait until the kidnapping of Alafrid and Gieve here. Alfarid is way to important right now to just... yoink her from there.
OH! What if the do the same with Vahriz as they are doing with Shapur!? CHABIK REACTION SCENE OOOOOOH!
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lindszeppelin · 11 months ago
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Linds… ugggggggh. Just ugh. I’m about thisclose to losing my shit. I agree with you on the Cabo pix and it’s absolutely disturbing to see him AGAIN hiding under a towel.
I’m distressed that he is not more distanced from this group and my patience is running thin. I wish I could completely shut out Austin’s non-work related images and info. But honestly there’s no way.
I have some musings about the situationship status — that (full disclosure) have no basis in knowledge or reality. It’s just the crap rolling around in my head. Anyway…
We have discussed the complex elements he was navigating in his personal and professional life as this arrangement was orchestrated. I wonder if he has conflated his own increased level of fame/attention due to his work with the amount of exposure he has by being associated with them. I mean maybe he doesn’t see it as a “Gerber” problem but mistakenly thinks it’s mostly due to his own fame. Like they would be able to live a more private life if not for HIM.
I find it hard to believe a man in his 30s who grew up in Hollywood would be that naive. But maybe his good heartedness has blinded him a bit to their ways.
AND/OR
He’s 100% not interested in a life partnership at this time and this will do for now so why bother breaking up with K and drawing down all the associated drama when he clearly invests minimal emotional capital in her anyway. It’s a great idea except for the downside that she/this tarnishes his image. But he is likely unaware of that part. And maybe no one whose opinion matters to him actually cares.
I don’t know.
This is what my brain resorts to because I fucking can’t stand STILL seeing him associated with her. It’s like pairing filet mignon with funyuns.
What is wrong with me??? Why why whyyyyyyy do I waste my time/energy on this????
Thanks for being there bestie! Thank god I’m not alone.
haha MJ I adore you so much, and i love your analogy of filet mignon and funyuns.
but i first wanna say that the reason why you or us can't stop thinking about this no matter how hard we want to just support austin's work and not want to be forced to see the cringe shit about his situationship is because we clearly see it for what it is. if he was with the woman of his dreams that he loved, we would support him and we would invest a lot less time musing over it because well...there would be no issues with said relationship to be concerned about. as women, we have the deeply intuitive knowing that SOMETHING IS WRONG and the problem is not being corrected. it's being left to corrode. plus, we care about him and so we worry. just like any person in our lives that we love, we worry and our brains can't help but get drawn to it and hope that they're okay. same applies here. so, you're not crazy for thinking about this or putting energy into it. we would not be here if he was in a truly loving relationship that was fucking obvious to the entire world. we would applaud him and wish him the best and have peace of mind. this situationship disturbs the peace because it is not right.
but secondly, i think the latter of your theories is where my money goes, if i was a gambling woman lol. she is a "here for the moment" chick, not "wife material". minimal investment, not wanting to deal with the litany of press and media about a huge breakup announcement. he's probably still traumatized from how the media has taken and spun the vanessa breakup so i don't blame him for being a little scared. but what we know is that kaia is not his forever. men that are serious about their intentions on a woman will waste no time, and will not only show their genuine interests for a woman but they will make plans and they will settle down faster. it happens all the time. my parents got engaged after 6 damn months and they're still together after decades of marriage. he clearly is not ready at this time for marriage and she is too young for that serious commitment. so, low investment and probably biding his time waiting for the right time and the right woman for him to drop this gerber baby.
he's a smart man, he would not propose to a 22 year old girl like this is 1942. he just got out of a 10 year relationship not long ago. men don't jump ship like that so soon. it's gonna take him time to be ready for that serious commitment. and men take a lot longer to be truly ready for marriage before women are anyway. he is focusing on his career before settling down, clearly, as he has stated a lot that he is career focused.
but i'll end this by just reinstating that the cabo pics from last christmas and after the award season this year were vastly different in tone compared to this christmas. he was out and about the last two times, yes he had a towel on his head once, but generally he was seen pictured outside. this time he was seemingly hiding away in the resort, left by himself and not wanting to be seen by the paps with her or her family. alarm bells ring off. if this man has to practically quarantine away on what is supposed to be a vacation then it seems like he's at the end of this rope. also, what man that had a 2 year anniversary with their girlfriend act like that? a man that doesn't give a damn about her. he never did this with vanessa, not even once. he was proud to be around her, and if the paps came around when he didn't want them around then he protected her first from the cameras, using himself as a shield. but the towel over his head in cabo is different. how much more he is willing to take before enough is enough is up to him, but this felt like a desperate attempt to be by himself. and if kaia was the one, she would never put her man in that position out on the beach to be readily papped when she knows he doesn't like it.
and no bestie you're not alone <3
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waitmyturtles · 2 years ago
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I told myself that I was going to pause all other dramas/doramas to finish up Bad Buddy this weekend. But, I discovered through @respectthepetty‘s post about The End of the World, With You, that Yoshida Munehiro -- A.K.FUCKING.A. KIDO SHIRO of The Novelist/Mood Indigo -- has a guest role in this show, so I’m effing back into watching it. (GAH, too many dramas.)
TEOTWWY is by Miki Koichiro, the screenwriter/director behind The Novelist/Pornographer and all of its continued sequels and prequels, and that’s literally the only reason why I picked up this new show. After last week’s second episode, I honestly wasn’t feeling the chemistry between Ritsu and Masumi. I get that Ritsu is Masumi’s first passionate love, but I think I wasn’t feeling the tropes used to demonstrate Masumi’s post-breakup obsession with Ritsu, like following him. I don’t believe that I had seen Ritsu give Masumi any indication that they were exclusive to each other (but I could have very well missed something...). And also, it IS clear in other ways that Ritsu was/is, in Masumi’s wonderful words, a fuckboy, so like... Masumi, you knew this about Ritsu already. 
In any case, I kinda felt like the show is putting Masumi up to be a tiny bit of a whining weenie -- but that is purely my own humble opinion. I don’t think the show is doing justice to how complicated Masumi’s feelings might be. Ritsu is clearly a selfish jackass, but I think he’s owning up to it just fine in the show, and it’s Masumi’s deal to deal with it.
I mean, maybe this show is going to be about Masumi’s maturity journey, in that he needs (of all things) a meteorite to hit the earth to recognize that maybe he needs to get more knowledgeable, fast, about how adults hook up and have relationships in the real world. At the end of yesterday’s episode, when he’s laying in bed with Ritsu, and saying he’d get turned on if Ritsu touched him... tell me something I don’t know, honey. 
Anyway, I apologize for whining, because I really want to see what Miki does with Yoshida, and if there’s a character comparison between Ritsu and Yoshida’s Kido. Kido was SO COMPLICATED, and icky, and FASCINATING, and misbehaved, and totally demonstrated his struggle between het “normalcy” and his attraction/fascination with Kijima and his own queer revelations in Mood Indigo. Ugh, he was amazing. 
I am loving that recent QLs are referencing The Novelist/Mood Indigo, because they are brilliant. I also think this means that I really need to put Raise de wa Chanto Shimasu on my list, which is a dorama about a sexually active woman with multiple partners, also directed by Miki Koichiro. All of the seasons and specials are subbed by an absolutely fabulous fansubber and, besides Zettai BL, are some of Miki’s most popular work. I’ll maybe catch up on those seasons in the late spring/summer. 
So, TL;DR, come at me, Yoshida, because TEOTWWY is back on my list. But this is otherwise a big Aof week for me.
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caffeineandsociety · 2 years ago
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The thing is, right, violence against trans people is often dismissed in two very distinct ways based on gender.
Violence against trans women is dismissed by justifying it. In the mainstream, we all know what that looks like - they're pretty blatant about it. If someone assaults a trans woman, they immediately assume it was self-defense - she must have tried to sexually assault them, obviously. If she's denied medical care, it's probably because she got belligerent, not that she was trans, though really what's the difference, ALL trans women are secretly big bullies of men deep down, and she deserved it for being such a self-destructive freak anyway, what a waste of medical resources, right?
Violence against trans men is dismissed by minimizing it. In the mainstream, this looks like writing off corrective rape and other assaults with the same old victim-blaming excuses we've always heard, or talking about our difficulty accessing transition AND gynecological care as a frivolity - "ugh, quit your whining, some people have REAL problems" - or stalwartly refusing to count us even as a footnote in discussions about the latter. It's "noooo, we're not trying to HURT you by cutting off your access to transition care, we're trying to make sure you REALLY need it, because you're CLEARLY too trend-obsessed and incompetent to be SURE about what you want for your own body." At "most affirming", it's "okay, well, if the stupid little baby girl wants to play at being a real human man, we'll play along - this means we get to hit you now, right? Men can take a hit! If you're really a man, stop whining about it, it wasn't that bad!"
And the thing is...on an intracommunity basis, we often get the same treatment, just usually dressed up in a pretty rainbow tablecloth and shoved 5 inches to the left.
We don't immediately ASSUME that a trans woman reporting an assault deserved it in a queer space - we know transphobia exists! We know people just randomly assault trans people for no other reason than being trans! Or, at least, we do in theory - but of course that doesn't always stop people here from IMMEDIATELY accepting "oh, well, I guess she was an exception" if the assailant comes and says "nuh-uh, I was just defending myself, she sexually harassed me!" Never mind that we know damned well that many people's threshold for what they think constitutes "sexual harassment" coming from a trans woman is "she flirted with me in a space where flirting is socially expected" or "she made a joke about her dick in an adult space where we have no problem with cis people making dick jokes" or "she spoke to me twice in the NSFW channel in this Discord server" or "she posted lewd selfies on her own personal blog while we were mutuals" or "she talked to me about an anime with more fanservice than I'm comfortable with (and THAT means she's a PEDO on top of what she did to me!)" or even just "she existed near me while trans" - that doesn't come into play, because We Should Believe Victims, right? Also, geez, I know you're being medically abused, but calm down, no one WILL treat you if you keep bellowing about it like that! Yeah, it sucks that they misgendered you and called you slurs when they fought back, but you don't SOUND like you were the victim in this altercation the way you keep ranting and raving and throwing your weight around!
And with trans men, barely ANYTHING has to change. It takes a bit of a pop-feminist bent, with "but perfectly passing and gender-conforming trans men get paid more than cis women, so clearly you are The Privileged One in this conversation" being a running assumption throughout, but despite the slightly different justification, it's...almost if not exactly the same shit on the surface. Corrective rape? Well, was it REALLY? Or did you just have sex with this person and then find out they have a slightly different opinion on some petty intracommunity issue? Because that's all the likes of you theyfab blue-hair-and-pronouns types care about anyway, is stupid arguments over terminology and ship wars, obviously. Being denied transition care? Ugh, you're sitting here whining because you can't get taxpayer-funded plastic surgery, grow up, some of us have real problems, other queer people are getting murdered in the streets and you're crying about your appearance, how selfish can you be!? (Ignore that I just called transition care lifesaving three posts ago...) You're saying you don't have accurate violence statistics because when you DO get killed, you're usually misgendered in death? Well it's fair that they're reporting it as violence against a woman, because that was probably the motive anyway, suck it up and stop worrying about petty optics shit! Oh, and now you're whining about a GIRL hitting you? Well, you're a man, so she couldn't have hurt you THAT bad! No, no, I'm not talking about the physical injury (but that too, you're still ALIVE, after all), I'm talking about the PSYCHOLOGICAL impact, you're a MAN and she's a WOMAN, so you know that YOU have the POWER in this discussion, so brush it off! You got hit by a man? Yeah, well, welcome to BEING a man, learn to take a hit, get used to it, at least he wasn't hitting WOMEN, you're a man, you SHOULD be our shield, you CHOSE that responsibility when you CHOSE to become a man, if you don't like it, well, be grateful I'm telling you to just shut up instead of detransition like the REST of the world would!
But the real sneaky thing in the dismissal of trans men's issues is how often people - usually but not exclusively cis people - will use the violence against trans women to shut us down, presenting that as the "REAL problems" that we DEFINITELY don't experience anything even CLOSE to no siree and it's SO cruel and trivializing to compare such petty nonissues as the highest rate of corrective rape in the queer community and being barred from treatment for gynecological cancers to that! Of course, most of the people who make this claim are the same ones who take the previously mentioned approach toward trans women, but let's not worry about that, right? The point is you need to shut up so we can focus on REAL issues - like this non-passing she/her multigender woman ~*~*making us all look bad*~*~ by posting lewds while non-passing being a HORRIBLE SEX PEST.
And the thing I need more people to realize is: this is bioessentialist.
Look at what's happening here. The approach taken against trans women is exactly the same one taken against most marginalized men - being stereotyped as violent, sex-crazed, not innately weak enough to ever be a VICTIM, only a LOSER. The approach taken against trans men is all the same shit we constantly hear used against women - being stereotyped as infantile, incompetent, weak, frivolous, vain, hysterical.
I don't expect better of a garden-variety transphobe, but I demand better from our own fucking community. Watch yourself before you start parroting that shit.
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pastelwitchling · 1 year ago
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I'm currently reading Crescent City, and I think I'm going to leave my thoughts on it here, starting with Part I. Disclaimer: I am actually enjoying this book, but I am also trudging through it for many reasons, so I won't hate on the book, but I will have negative critique, so if you can't handle seeing that, please don't keep reading. Also, there will be plenty of spoilers.
So here it is, Crescent City Part I, the good and the bad:
EXPOSITION. It's taking SO much energy for me just to read a chapter because the info dump is relentless. And I get it, this is the first book in the series, you've got to establish a few things, but almost ALL of the information comes in unnecessary moments when we don't need to know it. Until we see a character doing the Drop, I don't need two pages of explanation and history on it in the middle of a business meeting!
I really like how much of a party girl Bryce is, because it very much embraces that lifestyle and it's not another FMC who says she hates going out and parties, and yet is constantly persuaded into going anyway. Know what I mean? It's not some Mary Sue who can blame a night out on her friends. Bryce at least enjoys it, so I do appreciate that. A lot of people are about to hate me 😂 but I'm not a fan personally of a certain thing she does in the beginning, I don't think you should be normalizing that stuff, but I'm still early on in the book, so maybe they address it later.
There's a serious attempt here to make Bryce seem really out there with her outfits, and it feels a little out of place. The book keeps referring to her skintight dress and long legs, and I'm just like... she's going to a club? 😂 She works in a gallery? 😂 This is not a baffling wardrobe. Fran from The Nanny wore stuff like that all the time, and she's considered a fashion icon. It just feels like SJM is trying to tell us, Ooh, she's a real rebellious woman who dresses like no one else does, but... don't most people dress like that to a club? I have skintight dresses in rainbow colors, this isn't a wild outfit to wear, would all these characters chill? She's dressed fine 😂
Okay. I've never minded the use of male and female because in my mind, I've always equated them to masculine and feminine. However 😂 I have never seen these words used in such an insulting way as they are here. Male seems to be used synonymously to "pre*at*or" or "ty*ant", while female seems to be synonymously used to "sl*t" or "wh*re." It's... icky to me. They're so, so, sooo derogatory in this book, and I just can't stand this idea that if a man acts controlling or obsessive, or if a woman acts supposedly any less graceful than the Fae women or other Vanir (though I don't understand that logic either, since they're all awful, too), it's because it's in their blood? Because one is male and one is female and shudder...
On that note, Bryce is very prejudiced, in my opinion. Connor seemed like a good guy from all we've seen of him, and yet Bryce turns him down, despite having feelings for him, because he's a werewolf male, so he's bound to be controlling and try to take over her life. Class act there, Bryce.
I think Bryce walking in on Danika and the rest of the Pack of Devils was really, really, really well-written. Actually getting to the apartment took forever, but the moment she walks in to the end of Part I? Brilliant. I teared up, I ached with Bryce, you really feel with her pain and suffering, especially since we got that time with Danika and got to see their friendship and how much they cared about each other. Ugh, you just get it. She's shell-shocked, she's losing her grasp on reality, she's numb, she's disassociating, and it just all works so well.
Ithan... Ithan... what're you doing, Ithan? Why would you say that, Ithan? Bryce is your friend, Ithan. Don't turn on her, Ithan. She needs you, Ithan. Come on, Ithan, what the hell?
I liked Danika. She was clearly a mom friend, I loved how protective of Bryce she was, how much she clearly cared about her. Just very good.
I LOVED Hunt's introduction, I loved Hunt, I loved the one-sided interaction between him and Bryce, the way he felt for her without saying it, I loved Ruhn, I loved Isaiah; the men in this are so good so far... too bad they're male though, huh? Might be tough, fighting their natural inclination to be assholes 🤣
I love the way Bryce looks. I love that she's not this skinny girl, and also not this perfect hour glass figure, she's actually on the heavier side. I appreciate that.
I... want Sabine to stop living. She's... awful.
Why isn't Fury talking to Bryce anymore? Where'd she go? Fury, Bryce needs you now, girl 🥺
I really like how sexually free Bryce is. I think that's a nice touch. (rim shot) 😂😂😂
What was the point of Reid? Was there a point to him? This boyfriend she's had for two years, and all of a sudden during a bad dinner that she's always had to sit through, she decides she's had enough? It just felt so pointless, as far as I can see, there's been no need for him, at least not as this long-term boyfriend.
Anyway, that's pretty much it. I'm over 100 pages in, and outside of us finally getting the blurb and kicking off the plot, nothing's really happened. I'm hoping we're just getting all the exposition out of the way now in the first 10 chapters, and then we'll be done with that, because it's seriously getting in the way. Now that we've met Hunt, I feel excited to keep reading, see what happens with him and Bryce, and how the story moves forward.
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monstermaster13 · 2 years ago
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ah, the fall season...the season where summer bids us farewell, the leaves fall down and everything starts to get a little bit chillier (or warmer depending on what country you’re from) and where everything isn’t as it seems. Picture if you will, a time of year in which September counts down and leaves us for the year, chances are it is happening to you right now and when the ghosts/ghouls/undead beings start to wake up and plan their plans for the season of fright, that’s right, October. October is the season of fright, the season of monsters and horror, the season where the horror buffs out there get ready to embrace their inner monster. Now you have entered a world of paranormal activity, strange events, and supernatural beings, a world simply known as being part of the other half of your dimension, known as the Aykroyd zone. Why the Aykroyd zone? Because of the Aykroyd-verse being a major part of this and because of the Were-Aykroyd in general. The Were-Aykroyd or ‘Dan’ as he’s often called, loves to pay visit to his admirers around this time of year. And who is he you ask? Well he’d tell you but he would rather keep it a secret.
Nathan Forester was a massive fan of the spooky season, of horror in general and also a massive Dan Aykroyd simp. He was part of the Simp Central group on Discord and often chatted with his friends on there about his love of Dan Aykroyd and shared his insane-ly brilliant tales with them, he didn’t think of himself was superior to anyone else, he was just being himself, and he had a secret. ‘Ugh...I don’t get why you deal with these sorts of people that don’t get your work.’ Mel the koala-girl exclaimed as she walked into the apartment room her friend was in.
“I know, seriously that Lorne guy…”
“I dealt with him myself, that guy is a pain in the ass.”
‘What is this? Like what is this? Seriously… isn’t it a lot to expect potential viewers to endure constant whining about being a victim?’ Nathan quipped, mimicking Lorne’s pompous comments. ‘Yeah, I found that comment to be stupid to be too. Like seriously, what was his problem with you anyway? You didn’t ask for his opinion, yet he showed up like a snooty parasite and sucked the life out of any enjoyment you were having at the time.’ ‘Absolutely and get this: He thinks i’ m whining about being a victim because nobody likes my uploads. Like he has any say in the matter, he’s not even a regular in the Amiright-verse. Seriously, what potential viewers? The Amiright-verse’s show was NEVER popular. Heck I was the only good character on that show during its initial 2008-2010 run.’
“Do you remember Lorne at all?”
‘No, all I remember is that the performances you get from that show often range from good to terrible and sometimes you get crap like Anondria/fake Andria who pretty much was already a stupid character idea since she was just a parody of a troll character pretending to be a woman, and she wasn’t even funny.’ ‘And that Annie Are You Okay chick.’ ‘Yeah, seriously pretending to be Jay Leno in order to defame me and attempting to ruin Jay for me like that. Why did Chucky and the other cast members even like her? She had no talent and she was the worst cast member of that year’s line-up. Heck it was her that caused me to hate Red and Agrimorfee during my run, because clearly they liked her and not me, despite her being medium talent at best.’ ‘Yeah I really have to question where he finds those people for that show. It really declined after you got kicked off the show though.’ ‘I admit that I was a bit of a Chevy Chase back then but I didn’t mean to. It’s just...why that medium talented hack was picked over me in terms of parody material is beyond me.’
“Yeah. I hated that character right from her first appearance. Why did she hate you? All she ever did was loathe you for stupid reasons and try to defame you. Such a bitch, truly the worst villain the Amiright-verse ever produced next to Andria.”
‘At least with Andria we didn’t find out she was actually a villain until much later, specifically the 2010-2012 run and by then I was just popping up for guest appearances on the show as a comeback. The twist with the Andria character actually being a male body-snatching demon from the Daloli-verse definitely paid off.’ ‘Yeah, Andria was the most complex villain in that universe. I wouldn’t call Red Ant or Agrimofee villains since they were both doing their jobs and they were obviously brainwashed by Annie into turning against you.’ ‘But this Lorne guy..I don’t even get it. Why did he just randomly show up and accuse me of playing the victim card when I don’t play the victim card since I actually DID lose two of my best friends and have trouble dealing with loss?’ ‘Maybe he thinks that you made a big deal out of it.’
“Nah. He clearly doesn’t think at all judging by his comments.”
‘Tell me about it. He told me that if you wanted to be more liked as a character you could drop the Were-Aykroyd act any time and talk about something else.’ ‘Well if he wanted to be more liked, he could have dropped the asshole persona anytime but nooo, it seems he didn’t get it.’ ‘Luckily though I fixed him…’ ‘Also act? What act? Does he think that this Were-Aykroyd thing is an act that I put on as part of a shock performance or something? Being a Were-Aykroyd is a way of life, since Dan possessed me this has been the way.’
“He’s just lucky he just crossed paths with me and not your Were-Aykroyd side.”
“Oh believe me, if he had met Dan he would have gotten straightened out for sure.”
‘Fortunately he or rather she...is now Laura Palmer.’ ‘So you turned him into Laura?’ ‘Yes and she is much nicer.’ ‘Besides, everyone knows all the Aykroyd centric song parody sequences I do in the Amiright-verse show aren’t done by me, well they’re written by me, but half of the time when those sequences happen it’s Dan himself singing them.’ ‘Everyone knows the Were-Aykroyd side possesses you when you do those sequences.’
“Being a Were-Aykroyd isn’t a costume, it’s not cosplay. It’s a lifestyle, it’s what I am.”
“Exactly.”
Nathan prided himself on being weird and dark, and he prided himself on creating material that astounded and frightened people and he knew that the Were-Aykroyd got himself a lot of admirers, and he couldn’t help but dream about it, being Dan Aykroyd was kind of enticing to him and he knew it. That’s why he couldn’t help but notice those masks on display, one of them was of Dan Aykroyd in the Twilight Zone movie.
Of course he had Were-Aykroyd powers that he often took advantage of. ‘Ha, those guys on that forum wannabe site who just sat there calling me a rando and saying I had a touch of the schiz and parental issues, well they’re the ones with issues. If clearly they say they don’t care about me then they shouldn’t have tagged me in their back-talking conversations in the first place.’ ‘I’ll say.’ Dan’s voice emitted from a mirror nearby.
“Dan...what a pleasant surprise.”
“You seem to be not too happy to see me.”
“It’s not that i’m not happy to see you, it’s just that I was in the middle of something.”
“And I couldn’t help but hear that you needed help dealing with those people.”
“It’s true, I do.”
‘Don’t you worry i’ve got this, just listen to me.’ Knowing how much he trusted the Canadian actor and writer, Nathan couldn’t help but listen to Dan’s words and agree with them, when he was in that forum-verse’s realm, he couldn’t believe just how stupid half of the people on there and he never could understand why they spoke in what he could only describe as edgelord language with such terms as ‘rando’ and ‘spedromon’. What even were those? He knew rando meant weird but there was not even any Urban Dictionary for ‘spedromon’. ‘Like what the hell even is spedromon anyway? Some kind of weird Digimon name? Gabu digivolve to..Spedromon! A racial slang term? Don’t they even speak real English?’ ‘Edgelord speak isn’t even a legit language, it’s like a bunch of aliens imitating humans thinking that’s how we talk online these days and decided to copy that.’
Those people obviously didn’t get that Nathan wasn’t demanding and asking them to care about his plight, but given his situation he would have done anything to get those Daloli-verse parasites away from him at the time, he knew they caused drama and did nothing but target hm for no reason and took things he said out of context. The Homestuck fanboy that tried to defame him and attack him turned out to be a demon who almost got away with taking over Jade Harley’s body if it wasn’t for one little flaw - he was a coward, a coward who obviously knew didn’t know when to quit and didn’t know when he had been beaten. Of course the Monster World universe’s version of Jade was designed to resemble an actual humanoid character instead of how she looked in the web comic. Nathan just felt bad for Jade in that sense, stuck with a deranged pseudo-serial killer wannabe who wanted her body and didn’t like her as a person. He thought Jade deserved better than that guy, he could tell Jade didn’t want anything to do with that stalker. It was literally like the Tales From The Crypt episode Dead Right. He knew Jade was only in a relationship with that stalker so she could pretend to love him and she only wanted to wait around until he died, or got arrested/defeated. She loved the bastard, she hated every little thing about him, from his two-faced way of saying he’d ‘move on’ only to complain behind other people’s backs, to his obsession with her, to the fact nobody even bothered to do something, she wanted him gone. Of course Jade did get her revenge on him by cursing him to be exactly like her, and now said stalker becomes Jade’s twin whenever he gets ‘bitchy’ with someone.
Nathan chuckled as he listened to Dan. ‘Listen to me, you don’t need people like that, so you lost two of your best friends within last year? If they were so quick to leave you like that, they should have told you.’ ‘One of them did, the other isolated themselves from me.’ ‘If your very own best friend isolates themselves from you without even explaining first, then I think they have problems, but problems can be fixed.’
“What do you mean?”
“I think last year ended on a terrible note for me. But you made things better.”
“Indeed I did, and you know what? I can help you.”
“You can?”
“Yes...a good Were-Aykroyd always helps.”
Those words made Nathan feel better and more relaxed as the eyes on the mask gave off an eerie glow and hypnotized him, he began to think about being Dan again. Those people who called him a rando would pay for that and he knew just how he’d do so, as he thought about letting his own inner Were-Aykroyd out. He examined himself for a bit as a tingling sensation slowly crept over him, his arms slowly broadened as brownish hairs grew on them while his skin matured and as his hands grew in size. The same type of hairs grew on his palms too.
In addition to this his chest broadened as the hairs grew on them, his stomach also broadened and grew in size and width, sporting brownish hairs on it while his back also broadened a it, he examined himself, feeling quite proud of himself as his legs altered in the same way as his hands, his feet enlarged as two of the toes between both feet stuck together at the knuckle, becoming webbed in appearance. He slowly shot up in height to 6’1 as his rear plumped up, his shoulders broadened and he could already hear Dan Aykroyd’s voice in his head, telling him this was natural as his neckline altered, his hair darkened a bit as his brow altered while his forehead elevated, his eyes widened, one turning green while the other remained brown, his nose broadened, a small cleft popping up in the middle of it as his lips became a bit more kissable and his features contorted, becoming Aykroydian. He looked very much like Dan now and he knew it, he always couldn’t help but simp over himself. Naturally since the Were-Aykroyd in general was extremely alluring and charismatic and thicc, that part in particular was often overlooked. His voice deepened and matured, developing a Canadian accent and altering into a replication of Dan’s voice, as his mind and personality altered, giving him the charismatic personality of his persona. That persona was a separate persona from his normal one, that he just so happened to enjoy being.
It was at this point he was fully this persona and he was still himself at the same, he was Dan the Were-Aykroyd and he was protective of his other half. His other-half ‘Nathan’ was someone that he took pride in teaching his ways to ‘Nathan’ and making sure that everything was right, and he knew he had an important job to do. ‘Ah yes, i’ve got some particularly nasty specimens on the chan-board forum realm to sort out.’ He used his powers to appear in the realm known as the Daloli-verse reject zone.
This zone’s main inhabitants were antagonists that even the main daloli-verse citizens turned down, one was IanBlanko. Ian’s appearance was basically akin to a sewer mutant, as a result of his hatred for Nathan, he hated Nathan and thought that it was disgusting that Nathan was a hypocrite for liking pig transformations while also disliking weight gain transformations were just skinny characters becoming larger versions of themselves. He himself was a grotesque creature and his avatar form did him no favors, his avatar form depicted a man who wore makeup that resembled the face of a cow, obviously this man was part of the Daloli-verse subculture and believed all that garbage that the Daloli-verse’s conspiracy theorist high-priest told him about him being a humanoid cow-monster. ‘Ah here we are, hello Mr Blanko.’ ‘I know you...you’re the Were-Aykroyd.’ ‘Yes I am and you’ve been a bad little parasite haven’t you?’ ‘What? No I haven’t.’
“A good Were-Aykroyd always knows when someone has been lying, and your group is notorious for it.”
“What? How did you know that?”
‘I know that you said that you found it hypocritical that Nathan didn’t like weight gain stories/transformations where someone just becomes an overweight slovenly version of themselves. You heard incorrectly, he specifically said that he hates it when it’s just a skinny or non-fat character being fattened up and made into a slob, not that he hates weight gain in general. Also what do pig transformations have to do with it?’ ‘I….’ ‘Oh I get it, it’s because half of the pig tf subjects in the wall of favorites are female and you think it’s body-shaming, yet it’s totally not body-shaming if it’s a man, right?’ ‘I didn’t say that.’ ‘You do realize that it’s not Nathan’s fault that the wall of favorites features mostly female transformations, right? I mean he didn’t commission those morph sequences to happen, those were courtesy of others, so why blame poor Nathan for it? And also...yes, it’s hypocritical...for you to think this is disgusting, yet you yourself clearly according to your official bio state that you identify as a cow-monster.’
“So I identify as a cow-monster, so what?”
‘You claim to identify as a descendant of the dark anthro bovine goddess Moocifer, who isn’t even part of your universe or the Daloli-verse. She is a Monsterverse and DA-Verse villain, and she has never had any descendants in the universe she comes from, in order for her to do that, her powers would need to be transferred to others.’ ‘Okay so I got one little bit of her myths wrong.’ ‘Not just one...but all the bits. Nothing in the myth says anything resembling what you mention in your bio, you didn’t even mention her shadow form or the fact that she pretty much ruled over the nightmare city.’
“Okay so I got everything wrong..”
‘Not just that, but you’re not even the same species. You only appeared in the form of a cow-monster because you were told by the Daloli-verse’s high priest that you have the soul of a cow-monster inside you. Said priest is a scam artist who uses his powers to con people and honestly if you are gullible enough to believe him, even the Daloli-verse’s dumbest would think you’re a moron.’ ‘But…’ ‘And about racial changes? Why do you dislike them? It’s not even offensive, ugh...you wannabe dalol-ilians these days.’
“What?”
“Looks like i’m going to have to teach you a lesson.”
Dan used his powers to bring the dimwitted Ian closer to him, he then used his powers to drain the hate-demon attributes out of him before entrancing him. Ian realized he had been a horrible person and thus broke down in tears, he never meant to offend Nathan or ‘Dan’, it’s just he wanted to belong and to be known, but the problem was the Daloli-Rejects were only ever noticed because of how just they seemed to vapidly agree with the actual Daloli-verse on everything, he was basically a patsy to those types of people. ‘Now what kind of organization actually allows this to happen to someone who clearly didn’t deserve it?’ ‘A bad one?’ ‘Exactly, your friends and the Daloli-verse are evil. They corrupted your own opinion of Nathan to be a hateful one even though you don’t even know him.’
‘My friend isn’t corrupted and we’re not evil!’ Another ‘reject’ chimed in, that reject was Jake, Jake was a bit of a smug jackass who always thought that there was always subtext that meant something else.’ ‘Says the man who said that the one Nights of Alterations episode was an incest allegory.’ ‘Well it was. That monster-boy was in a gay relationship with someone who was also his surogate father figure, clearly it’s incest.’ ‘No, it’s not. Whoever told you that it’s incest, they don’t know what it actually is. Look, people like you are the reason the episode got edited and remade. Because honestly the show wasn’t made for you to complain about.’ ‘I’m sorry, okay.’ ‘Oh and by the way, Nathan is bi and so am I. He didn’t choose to make them bisexual in the remake to make fun of snobby wannabe critics like you.’
“Okay i’m sorry.”
“Oh and i’m not done yet, remember that one deranged Homestuck fanboy?”
“The Jade Harley fetishist?”
“Yes, the demon with the Jade Harley fetish who turned out to be a serial killer.”
‘Okay I do admit that he got a little carried away….’ ‘ And who’s fault is that? Oh that’s right, yours.’ Dan held him up with his super-human strength and grabbed him before running his hands through his hair. ‘I hate to admit it, but you’re right.’ ‘Of course I am. I mean if I was Andrew Hussie and I saw that freak trying to stalk me I would become afraid of my own biggest fans for life. Heck, i’d self isolate from them forever.’ ‘We’re sorry.’ ‘You still need fixing though, allow me to show you.’ Dan used his powers to condition Ian and Jake forever, helping them remember all the mistakes they had made and as they did he transferred his powers to them, transforming them into Were-Aykroyds just like him, both of them were turned equally as Aykroyd-like as he was, and immediately forgot about the Daloli-verse or being part of the group to begin with. ‘You’re right, why would we be part of such a ridiculous group? Clearly we are too intelligent to be with people who think little of us.’ ‘Of course, you’re my new siblings after all. You’ve got a little bit of me in you.’ The two new Were-Aykroyds then gestured over to the direction of the Reject members who called Nathan a ‘rando’, one of them was a ratty looking humanoid named Jacobslaughter who looked like a mix of a stereotypical stoner and a Chud. ‘Excuse me, are the rando guy?’
‘Who wants to know?’
‘I do. Hi i’m Dan. And I heard you talked about Nathan to your fellow rejects-members behind his back after he quit your group and called him a rando.’ ‘Well that’s just because he came across as someone who obviously has a case of the schiz and parental issues who acts like a major rando for no reason other to make threats and demands towards us as if he thinks we care about who he is.’ ‘Threats? Demands? Look, all he did was ask you to get rid of two little pests known as Ian and Jake. But don’t worry I fixed that for you. Next time, keep your little minions away from my friends. And also using schizophrenia as an insult is offense to people with actual mental conditions.’ ‘And we should care about this why?’ ‘Because if you go around calling someone who wants you to help him rando and act like he’s a nutcase, then you have problems.’
“Uhhhh…”
‘And another thing...if your friends clearly don’t care why bother talking about him at all? He’s gone, he’s not coming back, shaming him will not make him come back. Also don’t you know his father died two years ago? Bringing up parental issues around him is one way to tick him off.’ ‘What are you, my grand-dad?’ Dan cleared his throat and manifested as an elderly version of himself as he appeared next to him and mocked him. ‘You kids and your randos and your spedromon and whatever slang term you’re using these days. When I was your age we spoke proper English and didn’t use textspeak and we didn’t say no1currs either. We used words like moron, knucklehead, peabrain, stupid, brain-dead.’ ‘Are you mocking me?’ ‘I sure am. Like what kind of person outside of the dimension/realm you come from talks like that?’ ‘Hey...don’t trash my language.’ ‘it’s a language ripe for trashing if you ask me. It’s like an alien that thought that humans talk in textspeak and memes all the time so that’s the default style and it’s a style that doesn’t speak to you.’ ‘What?’ ‘It’s so true, oh and that attire of yours too...ugh, deliver me from LL Bean.’
‘What?’ ‘I think there’s a lot about you that needs to be desired. But you’re not right, I can fix you.’ ‘Fix me? But i’m fine the way I am.’ Before the foolish Jacob could say anything though, Dan grabbed him and dragged him closer, using his hypnotic voice to put him under his spell and condition him, making him regret everything he had said. He felt more relaxed as Dan conditioned him further and he realized…’why would I be here anyway? Clearly I don’t belong with those non-Aykroydian specimens. I want to be Aykroydian.’ With a kiss Dan fully converted Jacob and turned him into a fellow Were-Aykroyd, before going after the rest of the rejects and converting them.
It wasn’t long until the entirety of the Daloli-verse’s rejects groups were all Aykroyded up, with that done Dan decided to leave the Daloli-verse reject’s realm and head back to the Monster-verse, after all he was getting ready for the halloween season and he had a party to plan for all his admirers. And thus our little tale comes to a conclusion, but not before Dan decided to set up a few Dan Aykroyd mask displays, including a Valkenheiser mask, he knew that there were people that would definitely want them.
The lesson for this story is to always be careful of who you pick on online, if you end up questioning or picking on someone who has powers then you should always apologize or they might come to get you as a form of revenge, be careful of who you call a ‘rando’, because the real rando isn’t the person you’re mocking, it’s YOU. When someone who looks and acts different than you asks for help, don’t dismiss them and call them a ‘rando’..help them, after all there’s no place in this world for that kind of behavior. But don’t worry, you can fix that, by going on a little to a place known as the Aykroyd zone.
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wclfwiife · 2 years ago
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Rehab sucks - pt 1
“Up and at ‘em, girl.” the voice, much too loud for this ungodly hour, rang out through the dark hospital like room. It cut through the white noise from the walls like a knife slicing through her skull as she slowly tripped back into consciousness. 
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“Ugh,” she groaned, her hands shooting up to cover her eyes as the staff member pulled her curtains open. “Leave it.” Ash hissed, the photosensitivity part of her detox kicked in hard and already having not been a huge fan of immediately being sucker punched by the sun anyway, the head-achey woman was irked by this to say the least. “I prefer the dark.” 
The staff member denied her request for darkness, walking towards her with a tray holding the familiar little plastic cup of pills sat beside a plate of plain toast, dry scrambled eggs, and 2 bigger plastic cups, one half filled with apple juice and one with water. She’d have rolled her eyes if her head didn’t hurt so much. It seemed counterintuitive really, giving the drug addict more drugs to detox off the original drugs. Only in America, probably. Seemed like a very America thing to instill. They claim its for comfort during the detoxification process but to her, it seemed like just another insurance scam because they sure as fuck weren’t helping her feel better the past few days. The nausea wasn’t better, the headaches weren’t duller, her fluctuating temperature and chills did not get less painful so in her humble opinion, the doctors here long with their oh-so-caring staff could take these pills and suppository them right up their--- 
“Morning medicine time, c’mon. I cant leave till you shove these down your throat or I do.” His voice once again sliced into he skull right through her last thought, resulting in an extremely pointed glare from the young woman. “Be my guest. Your throat seems to need them more than mine does.” She shot back, well aware that his threat was aimed at her but it wasn’t in her to let anyone who thought hair gel was meant to be seen as a top layer boss her around. 
He shoved the pills closer to her rather violently, as if to strengthen the threat. “You wanna go to jail? We all know you’re in here to keep outta the big house, girl, so do yourself the favor and just take the damn meds.” 
“If I want to detox dry, I can.” She pushed the cup back in his direction before crossing her arms. “They said I gotta detox, they didn’t say I have to take any of your bullshit. Or your pills.” 
The man she came to know as Ted, although endearingly preferred to call him dick head (it did rhyme after all, just a moniker to help remember his name, really), was clearly getting impatient at this point. He pulled a syringe from his pocket and grabbed her arm roughly. “Hey!” she yelled, yanking her arm as hard as she could to release his grasp but he only tightened it. “Let go of me! What the fuck!? Let me go, you big fucking oaf, get the fuck off o’ me!” She kept writhing and tugging her limb in hopes to get free but the more she struggled the harder he gripped around her upper arm. He said something about making him strap her down and something else about it hurting more if she struggled but he didn’t say what was inside the syringe in his opposite hand. She kept making a scene hoping to catch the attention of someone outside the door and to her relief, the doorknob lowered and another staff member, Pete, rushed in. “Oh my God, please, help me, he’s fuckin’ crazy, please, get this asshole off me, he’s n---” The relief however, was short lived when Pete asked what was happening and instead of helping Ash, he too came to hold her down. “What the fuck are you doing?” She screamed at Pete, now strapping her other arm down at her bedside and moving to strap her legs down. Ash wasn’t a weak girl by any means, but these two grown men tag teaming her while she was in a weakened state was clearly an unfair fight. 
“What are you waiting for?” Pete spat to Ted in a hushed, urgent sounding tone.  Ted grimaced as he strapped her left arm down, tighter than the other restraints were drawn, and pointed to her pill cup with the needle. “She wouldn’t take her damn meds. She’s supposed to take the meds first.” “Well make her take them then. What, ya got a crush on this one? Going soft on us?” Ted snorted, pulling the strap harder, tightening the already too tight restraint on her left wrist and she winced as her skin pinched as it twisted and her bones felt like they were in a vice.
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“I’m not gettin’ into shit from Doctor Douchebag because the ratios are wrong and the whole thing gets fucked. The meds are supposed to be first.” He stressed again, pointing to the untaken pills on the tray once more. “Jesus Christ,” Pete shook his head, frustrated and moved back up towards her face and picked up the small cup with almost too much of that frustration as they almost flew out of it and onto the bed and floor.  “Nice job, dumbass.”  “Shut the fuck up!” Pete, who usually had a calmer demeanor than Ted, which she now realized was obviously an act or he truly had the shortest fuse known to man, repositioned himself so he could grab her jaw and keep it in place as she turned her head violently away from him until he grabbed a fistful of her hair at the base of her neck and wrenched backwards. She hissed at the pain, trying to keep her mouth shut as the plastic cup was being shoved at her lips. Pete kept pushing the cup at her mouth, muttering angry words until Ted grabbed her face, pushing his thumb and index fingers into opposite cheeks, prying her teeth open from the outside like trying to give an animal a pill who wouldn’t unclench its jaw. He finally got her mouth open just enough for Pete to throw the pills in. 
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Three differently shaped pills of varying sizes spilled across her tongue, playing a disgusting tasting game of tag as she tried to spit them out or at least hide them in her cheeks or under her tongue until Pete, the stupid jerk, also poured the water into her mouth, giving her no choice but to swallow or essentially choke to death on both as her head was still pulled backwards leaving the pills and liquid nowhere to go but down. She coughed violently as it all made its way roughly down her throat, it felt like all three pills rolled oddly down her trachea threatening to get stuck at the odd angle she was being held in. When Pete finally let go, she threw herself forward, still strapped to her bed, gasping for breath and choking on the awkward liquid, air, and pills. She wanted so badly to throw up or rub her throat at least, or even just her scalp where his fingers clutched her hair so tightly she was sure he took a few strands with him. 
“You’re both sick bastards,” she muttered through heavy breaths, still fighting against the restraints as best she could but her headache had easily turned into a full blown migraine at this point and the movement was agonizing. Ted took this moment to stab her bicep with the mystery needle and almost immediately the room was no longer still and the two men, who she could realistically presume were not swaying at the foot of her bed, were definitely swaying as he head and eyelids became heavier and heavier until the moving wavy room just turned black. The two staff members waited until they were sure she was out, although didn’t bother undoing her restraints as Ted shoved the used syringe back into his pocket and the men took their leave, quietly bickering on their way out.
@staysaliive​
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lochnessies · 3 years ago
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so i finished season one of downton abbey at my mother’s request and it’s very good but honestly the drama and characters in this show have made me angrier than anything in game of thrones.
i’ve never disliked a main character more tbh… like mary is fucking awful! at least w the people i hate in game of thrones i know they’ll get what’s coming to them eventually but i know she won’t
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firebirdsdaughter · 3 years ago
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… I have no problem w/ the direction RE has taken, I just can’t stand Ethan or the Winters family.
Not any sort of high moral argument, either. I just do not like them as characters and if they were live people I would not like them either. I find their personalities and behaviours irritating and infuriating.
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robininthelabyrinth · 3 years ago
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3. I have no idea if this time line would work, but MYX and XY get attached to each other, so when the time comes that MYX and XY need to leave Koi Tower, JGY helps them get married in secret and run away to Dongu. Anyways, a few years latter, JGY has a kid that needs to go and people in a removed location that owe him favors! Isn’t that a wonderful combination! A Jin(?) Rusong raised by Uncles Mo and Xue, or whatever they go by these days, would be very chaotic. Bonus: they start a relatively safe demonic cultivation sect, maybe with some guidance from the Nie (has NMJ never been killed by the Jin in this Au?), or more specifically, Huaisang. SL and XXC who got a happy ending decide to check out this no blood line sect (it looks slightly dubious, but surely can’t be to bad! Right?) A-Qing at least is enjoying her new friend -🟪🦋
Should Have Been Listening - ao3
“Let go of me.”
“I won’t,” Mo Xuanyu said, clutching Xue Yang’s arm. “I won’t, I won’t! You’re my only friend here!”
Xue Yang looked down at him in what he thought was mostly exasperation, but might have also been a little fondness – after all, if it’d been anyone else who’d grabbed him, he’d have stabbed them.
He still didn’t know why he didn’t stab Mo Xuanyu, too, but in all honesty, he wasn’t that interested in exploring it. He did what he wanted, and right now, he didn’t want to murder Mo Xuanyu.
Irritating as he sometimes was.
“Little brat,” he said. “I have important business to go do.”
“It’s not something that he ordered, though!”
“So what?” Xue Yang bristled. “I don’t just do what hetells me!”
“But that means he won’t cover for you, and that means you’ll get in trouble!” Mo Xuanyu argued. “How can I let you go all alone to get in trouble? You have to take me with you! What will you do without me? Who’ll keep you entertained and sneak sweets for you if not for me?”
Xue Yang’s lips twitched. Okay, maybe there was a reason he kept the brat around.
“You don’t understand,” he said. “This is something I’ve got to do – something I’ve wanted to do for a long time. I’m going to kill a lot of people and get into a lot of trouble, more trouble than ever before. I’ll probably lose my life. How can I possibly take you with me?”
Mo Xuanyu scowled up at him. It was a very weak scowl – barely more than a pout. “You think that’s going to make me not want to come with you?”
Xue Yang’s eyebrows went up. “You cry at the sight of blood!”
“I cry at a lot of things!”
Xue Yang wasn’t sure how to respond to that. It was true, Mo Xuanyu cried at a lot of things.
“Maybe if I come with you, it won’t be so bad!”
Yeeeeah, Xue Yang wasn’t going to count on that.
“Or maybe you don’t have to go…?”
“I have to go,” he explained. “If I don’t go, I can’t get revenge, and I have to have revenge.”
Mo Xuanyu blinked up at him.
“I don’t really understand, but okay,” he said, and tugged on his arm. “Let’s go together, then. I promise I won’t cry!”
-
He cried.
He cried a lot.
-
“Stop fucking crying.”
-
“Just – ugh. Listen. You’re ruining the mood.”
-
“If you can’t stop crying, go away. Now. Or I’ll stab you!”
-
“Okay, see, look, I just killed the leaders, see? Just the old men. Everyone else is just locked in their rooms. Once the sect leader comes back, I’ll kill him too, and that’ll be all. Okay? Everyone else lives. I promise. Now stop crying, okay?”
-
“I don’t want to know,” Jin Guangyao said when they got back. “I don’t want to know at all.”
“Good,” Xue Yang grumbled. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Enough people heard about the reason for what you did that opinions are mixed as to whether your actions were the Chang clan’s just rewards for their former misdeeds or if they were actually wrong,” Jin Guangyao said. He looked irritated. “But you still killed high-ranking members of a sect, and you left enough alive that they’re demanding your head on a platter. You’re going to need to run away.”
Mo Xuanyu hesitantly gestured as if he wished to speak.
“Yes, you can go with him. Now that my father is dead, no one cares where you are.”
Mo Xuanyu beamed.
“You’re just going to let us go?” Xue Yang asked suspiciously. “That seems unlike you. What’s in it for you?”
“Oh, I’m not just going to let you go. I’m going to give you money, too,” Jin Guangyao said. “And all you need to do for me is one little tiny favor –”
Pity that that was when Xue Yang stopped listening, too busy staring at Mo Xuanyu’s delighted face and counting all the way he was in for it now.
-
“I’ve always wanted to take care of a baby,” Mo Xuanyu said happily.
“Good for you,” Xue Yang said darkly as he stalked through the streets.
He would rather that Jin Guangyao had needed a body buried and a death covered up or something – and judging by the baby’s perturbed expression, it probably agreed with him. Fuck, maybe Jin Guangyao had meant for them to murder the baby once they got it far enough out of the way. It was just as plausible as Mo Xuanyu's assumption that they were supposed to take care of it.
Damnit, maybe he should have been listening.
“Listen, neither of us are equipped to handle a baby. Go find a woman to help us – someone poor and helpless who doesn’t have any other choice.”
“Okay!”
-
Xue Yang shut his eyes. “What exactly,” he said slowly, “did you think I asked you to get us a woman for, exactly?”
“To…watch the baby?” Mo Xuanyu guessed. “When we’re busy or sleeping? Anyway, what’s wrong with A-Qing, anyway? She’s nice!”
“I’m not nice,” A-Qing said. The damn brat was smirking – and for once it wasn’t his damn brat, but some blind brat with a cocky expression. “I stole your wallet and you burst into tears and it was really embarrassing.”
“He does that,” Xue Yang said wearily. At least he’d noticed the theft this time – all of his lessons in ‘how not to be a sucker and get constantly taken advantage of’ were maybe having something of an impact. Maybe. “For some reason I’m apparently into it.”
He couldn’t explain it any other way.
“…loser.”
“I will stab you,” Xue Yang threatened. “I don’t care if you’re blind.”
“Won’t someone tell me why A-Qing isn’t a perfectly good babysitter?” Mo Xuanyu demanded. He was holding the baby in his arms again – the baby liked him more than it did Xue Yang, which meant that between Mo Xuanyu and the baby, the baby had better self-preservation instincts – and he was trying his best stern scowl which was of course barely more than a pout and a so-called ‘fierce’ expression that made Xue Yang want to laugh.
Not even Mo Xuanyu’s horrific make-up skills could make thatface intimidating. Or maybe it was just that the person behind the face was just so completely unthreatening that there was no help for it?
“Well? Tell me!”
Xue Yan opened his mouth, then shrugged and shut it again.
A-Qing patted Mo Xuanyu on the shoulder. “I’m too young. No milk.”
“…milk?”
“You know. The thing babies eat?”
“…milk,” Mo Xuanyu repeated, only now he looked absolutely heartbroken at having failed the mission that Xue Yang had assigned him almost entirely just to get him out of the way while Xue Yang collected some spare cash and threatened their way onto a ride out of this piece of shit town.
“It’s fine,” Xue Yang said hastily. “We’ll just get a goat or something, I don’t know.”
“Okay, I actually only came here to laugh at you,” A-Qing said. “But now I’m legitimately worried about this baby. Don’t you two know anything? How’d you even get a baby, anyway?”
-
“Stop laughing. It’s not that funny.”
-
“Seriously. Stop laughing, or I stab you.”
“Don’t worry, A-Qing,” Mo Xuanyu said. “He doesn’t mean it! Threats are just how he expresses affection!”
“It most certainly is not.”
“That is absolutely amazing,” A-Qing said, wiping her eyes. “Best thing I’ve ever heard., if by best I mean worse-but-hilarious. I mean. If that’s what he considers affection, what must his flirting be like?”
“No one is flirting with anyone!”
-
“Are you going to leave at some point?”
“Obviously not,” A-Qing said. She’d caught the same ride as them, using Xue Yang’s cash no less – Mo Xuanyu had insisted that it was the least they could do after the whole milk misunderstanding, which was stupid, she ought to be paying them for wasting their time. Xue Yang couldn’t wait to get rid of her, although he had to admit that she’d been pretty useful in terms of putting on the ‘poor sad blind girl and her two brothers all alone in the world’ act to get them a room at the inn at prices even Xue Yang felt comfortable paying. “Are you joking? This is so much funnier than walking by myself. Anyway, I enjoy watching people crash and burn.”
“Aren’t you too young to be such a bitch?” Xue Yang hissed. “And, I don’t know, blind?”
“You know what I mean.”
“I don’t care what you –”
The sound of crying came from the other room.
It was quickly followed by a second set of crying.
Xue Yang felt the onset of a headache.
“…truce?” A-Qing suggested sweetly, as if she knew exactly how much it pissed him off and thought it was the funniest thing ever, which was…probably accurate, actually. “I’ll get the baby to stop crying if you do the same with Mo Xuanyu.”
Yeah, that was definitely a headache. The sort of headache called why do I like that brat.
Mo Xuanyu owed him so much candy for putting up with this shit.
“Fine,” Xue Yang said begrudgingly. “Truce. Temporarily. And then you leave!”
-
“So we live here now, huh?” A-Qing said, looking around the house they’d claimed. “That’s neat.”
“Why do you live with us again?” Xue Yang asked her, though by now he barely even meant it. A-Qing was clearly another one in the same mold as Mo Xuanyu: you just couldn’t say no to her…or, rather, you could, at length and top volume and with threats, only it just didn’t stick. “I definitely did not recall asking you to stay.”
Though it was nice to have someone else around that wasn’t going to get immediately ripped off by literally anyone who came their way. Mo Xuanyu’d started getting conned by the literal infant that they were taking care of – he was completely hopeless.
Also, questionably blind or not, at least A-Qing had no hesitation about beating people with her stick if they struck her the wrong way, which was a life approach Xue Yang agreed with wholeheartedly.
“She’s going to learn to cultivate!” Mo Xuanyu chirped from where he was applying his make-up. “Demonic cultivation, too! We had a whole discussion about it while you were out getting groceries!”
That made a certain amount of sense, Xue Yang supposed. You didn’t need talent to be a demonic cultivator – technically speaking, given his bloodline, Mo Xuanyu was more naturally gifted in cultivation than Xue Yang, which was just wrong on all sorts of levels – and it was certainly more effective a defense mechanism than A-Qing’s stick. If there were two of them, they could protect Mo Xuanyu and the baby more effectively, taking shifts when needed, and Mo Xuanyu, who was also going to learn demonic cultivation no matter how many times Xue Yang had to hammer it into his head, could be the last line of defense, largely since no one would ever expect him to be able to do…anything…and they’d be right, too.
So it wasn’t the craziest idea in the world, only…
“…who is she going to be learning from, exactly!?”
-
“Have you ever considered charging for your skill in teaching cultivation lessons instead of your skill in stabbing people?” A-Qing asked one day. They were lying on the ground and having the corpses they’d raised fan them to try to reduce the temperature – it was that sort of day. Also, Mo Xuanyu, who might’ve objected, wasn’t around. “You’re not actually that bad at this. Might be more profitable, and less work. Just a thought.”
“Shut up. I’m great at stabbing people.”
“Yeah, but then after a while we have to move because people get annoyed at that, and it’s getting a little annoying to have to pack up all the time.”
“We’d have to move anyway. We’re wanted criminals, remember?”
“We could be wanted criminals with a house. Besides, wouldn’t you like to be called Teacher Xue?”
“What? No. Gross.”
-
“So you see, it turns out that they were teaching demonic cultivation in a safe and organized fashion,” Xiao Xingchen explained enthusiastically. “They’d even gathered up their own little sect! And of course everyone heard what the Chang clan did, so there’s no need to worry about them going around and murdering people at random – it was a targeted revenge scheme.”
“We’re working on teaching them regular cultivation,” Song Lan agreed, nodding. “To help mitigate the negative effects of demonic cultivation…well, we started out by just teaching them.”
“It turned out that they’d been secretly teaching all of the local delinquents, too, or at least Mo-gongzi had been teaching a few and Mistress Qing was teaching a few others, and even Sect Leader Xue had a few disciples,” Xiao Xingchen said, politely omitting or possibly having not noticed the fact that Mo Xuanyu had been teaching his ‘friends’ (read: scammers trying to take advantage of him), while A-Qing and Xue Yang had each been trying to form competing gangs and/or obtain lackeys. Xue Yang didn’t mind the oversight, largely on account of the fact that A-Qing had been winning, damn her – he’d kept getting distracted by inventing new things. “And a few of them had real talent – and you know that Zichen and I have always wanted to start a sect of our own, with no bloodline ties –”
“We’re joining their sect,” Song Lan said. “We’ll be leading the orthodox side, while they lead the demonic cultivation aspect – safely, of course.”
“I guess it’s better than them being crazy,” Jiang Cheng said. He sounded dubious. “I don’t like it, but at least all the demonic cultivators can be in one spot, you know?”
He made it sound like they’d be dropping off new ones there in the future.
Like they’d opened up some sort of pet rescue and were taking in unwanted puppies or something.
“Agreed,” Nie Mingjue said. “To the extent that they aren’t causing active harm, containment seems an appropriate remedy here. Who seconds the motion?”
“I do,” Lan Xichen said, and smiled at the newly agreed-upon sect. “Welcome back to the cultivation world, Sect Leader Xue.”
-
“I don’t want to know,” Jin Guangyao said, glaring.
“Don’t worry,” Xue Yang told him. “This comes as much of a shock to me as to you.”
The glare intensified, but that was fine. Jin Guangyao’s facial expressions, however minor and generally overlooked, had been the only thing getting him through that awful, awful meeting just now where people kept trying to salute him and make him salute back and if he didn’t then he was letting down Mo Xuanyu (who would send him a sad look) and A-Qing (who would hear about it from Mo Xuanyu later and then find a way to step on his foot right when he was concentrating on something).
Not to mention their two new resident lovebirds, who looked so righteous and proper from the outside but who also may or may not have accidentally full-on actually resurrected some dead asshole cultivator more or less the first time they’d joined Xue Yang in his demonic cultivation laboratory – which would have been fine, you know, that happened in demonic cultivation though not normally to quite such a wow-is-he-actually-alive extent, except that the guy’s intermittent moments of clarity suggested that his two new sect members might have just brought back the Yiling Patriarch himself, which was going to make all of them wanted criminal again the second anyone found out about it.
Ugh.
Being called sect leader was completely not worth this shit.
Xue Yang comforted himself with the reminder that later today he was planning on publicly introducing Jin Guangyao to the Xue sect’s head junior disciple “Xue Song” and announcing loudly that the brat needed some lessons in manners, that he’d heard that that was Lianfeng-zun’s specialty, and nominating him to take care of the kid while they were visiting.
See how the fucker liked that.
“I always knew Xue-gege could do great things!” Mo Xuanyu said, clapping his hands as A-Qing rolled her (by now, Xue Yang was almost definitely sure not actually blind) eyes behind his back. “As long as I went with him!”
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fandomlovingfreak · 3 years ago
Text
Glacial Passion (9/?)
Regulus Black/Reader
Rating: E for Everyone
Trigger Warning: Arranged Marriage, angst, swearing occasionally
Word Count: 2059
MasterList Link I AO3 Link I Wattpad Link
Summary: Glacial, cold, icy… all words that described Regulus Black’s grey eyes. Was there truly no emotion behind those eyes, or did a caring man exist beneath? Could she defrost those glacial eyes?
Disclaimer: Regulus Black (Walburga Black, Orion Black, and Sirius Black) is a character from Harry Potter by J.K. Rowling. Reader or y/n is not owned by Rowling. This work has not been created for profit or financial compensation, and is a transformative fair use work in accordance with Section 107 of the United States Copyright Act.
Notes: Okay so I feel rushed 24/7 with this fanfic because of my schedule. I hope you all like it! I rewrote this like 5 times ugh! aha
Enjoy
Visitors at nine o'clock at night was far from uncommon for Sirius Black. But, he usually expected said visitors to arrive with him, hopefully after a wonderful night out drinking and dancing. Visitors that arrived at nine o'clock at night and by themselves were quite an uncommon occurrence at Number Five Godric Lane.
Sirius opens the door at the second knock. The figures of his younger brother and a young woman standing on his front porch both looking gloomy.
"Regulus?" The girl looks younger than his brother, very attractive-- well, she would be, he assumes, if she weren't wearing a scowl that rivaled Regulus's cloudy expression. Sirius leans against his door frame, crossing his arms against his chest nonchalantly, "And you must be (y/n)."
(y/n) opens her mouth to respond, but Regulus cuts her off before she can confirm or deny his statement, "Can we stay here?" The interruption seems to piss her off further, her anger coming off her in waves as she stares daggers at Regulus.
Sirius looks between the young couple for a beat, "I-- sure? But why are you here? What happened?"
"Walburga." Regulus steps forwards to enter, prompting Sirius to move out of the way of his brother and sister-in-law. (y/n) gives him an apologetic look but doesn't say anything as she follows her husband into the small space of Sirius's living room.
He wonders what Regulus has done to piss his wife off so thoroughly as he watches them take a seat on his couch, Regulus somewhere near the middle cushion and (y/n) as far to the right as she possibly can be without sitting on the armrest.
Sirius sits adjacent to them in the comfy reclining chair. After a moment of silence, he sighs, "So, are you going to tell me what's happened?"
"We'll only be here for a couple of days at the least. There was no way we could spend another night-- there."
"I don't care how long you stay. Stay as long as you need to." Sirius looks at (y/n), who still has not said a word to him or Regulus. She's not even looking at either of them, her lips drawn tight and her fingers neatly folded together on her lap. "Were you disowned?"
Regulus's eyes meet his, "No. Can we talk in the kitchen? Just for a moment."
"Sure," Sirius stands up, "I've been rude, though. (y/n) would you like anything to drink?"
The girl's eyes meet his, "Water would be fine, thank you."
"I'll be right back with your water." He leads Regulus into the small kitchen.
"Why are you speaking to me with your wife not present? And what happened anyway?" Sirius opens the cabinet, reaching for a glass as he speaks.
"I wasn't disowned specifically because of (y/n). I know it's the truth. Walburga thinks she's possibly pregnant, and besides, I am sure my father-in-law would be furious to find out our parents ruined his daughter's future over me."
"Is she?" Sirius asks as the glass overflows as he fills it.
"Is she what?"
Sirius rolls his eyes, "Is your wife pregnant?" Honestly, he can understand why (y/n) may be annoyed with Regulus. His little brother was always so distracted by his own thoughts he could hardly converse at a normal rate. Skipping over questions and statements, eager to give his take or changing the subject. He could sometimes be exhausting to talk to, especially if you weren't used to Regulus and his ways.
Regulus scoffs as if Sirius was an idiot to suggest such a thing, "I've never failed to cast a contraceptive charm before. It's just an inkling the woman has, hoping that even as I continue to put up a fight against her ridiculous opinions on how my-- my relationship should look, or how it should operate. Of course, when she suggested that... conceiving an heir was a family matter, I told her it wasn't any of her business. Which she didn't like, at all."
"So you're hanging on as the heir because she's convinced (y/n) is carrying your heir?" Regulus makes a face, the only convincing Sirius needed that he wasn't telling him the complete truth.
"I assume that's what she thinks. You know Walburga. She's convinced sex is strictly reproductive."
Sirius chuckles, "talk about your sex life much with dear old mum, eh Reggie?"
Regulus's frown deepens. Oh, how his younger sibling hated teasing, "of course not. She's become a complete nutter about my private matters. I don't even know how she figured out I was using the charm."
"Well, she is a nutter. Maybe she has Kreacher following you around." It's meant as a joke, but Regulus seems to question if there's some truth in the words. "Oh, c'mon Regulus. Wouldn't you notice the little creep if he had been what-- hiding underneath the bed?" Sirius stifles a laugh. Imagining the little gremlin sneaking into Regulus's bedroom to spy on him from under the bed. The image of Kreacher under the bed, the springs of the bed, knocking against his lumpy head.
"It's not funny. That's entirely possible--" Regulus takes the glass from Sirius's hand, downing it in one go.
"Hey! That was for (y/n)!"
In a very not-raised-by-Walburga-Black manner, Regulus wipes his mouth with the back of his sleeve, nearly slamming the glass on the countertop, "You can refill it."
Sirius mutters something about Regulus being a 'little git' as he refills the glass and pushing past Regulus to bring the glass to (y/n).
"Here you go." The younger woman takes the glass from him, smiling. The smile seems false in his opinion, her eyes immensely sad.
Sirius practically scurries back to his chair, "right-- so all I have to offer is a couch, which I suppose we can transfigure into a bed? Hopefully, that's okay?" His eyes meet (y/n)'s ignoring a sulking Regulus who sits down next to his wife.
"Of course. Thank you." (y/n) stands, looking at Regulus, "Do you mind?" He scowls but gets up off the couch, shuffling towards Sirius. Both brothers watch as (y/n) pulls her wand from her sleeve.
With an elegant flick of her wand, the couch transforms into a comfortable-looking bed large enough to fit two adults.
Looking pleased with her work, (y/n) sits back on the edge of the bed. Almost reluctantly, Regulus sits on the side of the bed (y/n) isn't occupying.
Again, Sirius has the desire to laugh. Clearly, there has been some sort of spat between the couple. Their mother's rudeness can't be the only thing that's got the couple this worked up.
The uncomfortable silence that overcomes the three of them is unbearable. In an attempt to put an end to the awkwardness, Sirius, with a grin, speaks, "I'm still baffled that I didn't get a wedding invitation."
Neither (y/n) nor Regulus look amused by his words.
"This is not the time, Sirius." If looks could kill, Regulus would have surely ended his life.
***
Undoubtedly, Regulus and Sirius shared DNA. I ponder the similarities between my husband and his older brother as I get ready for bed. They both have the same piercing grey eyes and deep brown hair. But their differences could be plainly seen as well. Regulus is a tad bit taller and far skinnier than Sirius. And Sirius's hair is much longer.
Even as their faces share similarities, Regulus always seems to wear a frown while Sirius clearly had an air of ease. Funnily enough, the frown that Regulus wears doesn't match the woman you'd think he would resemble, as Sirius was the one who favored his mother's sharp features. Regulus had clearly inherited Orion's bone structure.
Undoubtedly though, both men were attractive in their own way.
Spitting toothpaste into the basin, I make a face when the thought pops in my head that I find Regulus more handsome than his brother.
I suppose I am allowed to be biased, or at least should be biased, as I'm married to Regulus, but-- I feel silly thinking about this.
Walking back into the makeshift bedroom, I pass Regulus, who doesn't even meet my eye. We've barely spoken since we arrived in Godric's Hollow, only passing looks of anger between us. Part of me longs to reach out and grab his arm, tell him I overreacted, that I'm sorry... but am I really sorry? Or was I just longing for him to whisper sweet things as he held me in bed how he has for the past weeks? I certainly could go one night, or maybe even a few, without his touch.
Unfortunately, I very much wanted him to play the loving husband again. I wanted to listen to his stories and comfort him when painful memories were brought up. I wanted to kiss him in all the ways we could think. Soft and sensual, deep and unforgiving... I wanted the goodnight kisses and the sleepy morning ones.
I obviously-- I don't love him, not yet. Maybe never if this rollercoaster of hot and cold continues on with us. But I did find myself craving affection and attention from Regulus in a way that would suggest feelings had been developing.
And Gods, did I hope that he felt at least an inkling of these developing feelings of mine. Regulus could be soft and sweet in moments, but part of me wondered if he only felt something for me when I was beneath him. It-- was a thought that had begun to plague my mind as our honeymoon had taken a turn for the better.
I had no proof that he didn't have budding feelings for me; I ultimately felt insecure because of that fight.
The way he spoke to me reminded me of every time I was scolded by my parents or grandmother. Like I was a dumb child who didn't have a say in a decision like practically running away from home-- his home.
Climbing into bed, I pull the blanket up towards my chin. The curtains aren't completely drawn, leaving an opening for a sliver of moon to be seen.
I feel my eyes grow tired as I focus on the moon's illumination.
***
Regulus makes his way back into the living room, meaning to discuss their spat. Guilt had sat in the back of his mind since their argument, but he needed her to realize that the anger he showed hadn't been aimed at her. It was stupid to assume that she would just know and understand the history between himself and his parents, and why wouldn't she assume he was attacking her when he raised his voice?
Part of Regulus had hoped she would just understand, and he wouldn't have to explain the rocky relationship between his family to her. (y/n) could be incredibly understanding, but she wasn't a mind reader. He had been unfair.
The carefully crafted apology he had rehearsed in the bathroom as he brushed his teeth sat at the tip of his tongue, dying instantly when he noticed her already under the covers of their makeshift bed.
The moon shines through Sirius's shitty, cheap curtains, casting a beautiful glow on her.
His voice comes out quiet as he calls her name into the dark. Her body doesn't stir, and he walks closer to the bed. The gentle rise and fall of her sleeping form has him convinced she really has fallen asleep without him.
Almost by instinct, he gets into bed, moving closer to wrap her up in his arms, but he hesitates, wondering if she'd even want to be held by him after their fight.
He feels the pang of sadness at the thought that she may not want his touch any longer.
Regulus reasons with himself that if she really didn't want him near her, she would push him away during the night. Maybe-- maybe she would wake up with his body pressed up close against hers, and it could fix something, or at least maybe she'd wake up less angry at him.
Carefully he moves so she's tucked against his body, his arm wrapping around her waist the way he knows she likes best. With a content sigh, she settles back against his body.
Regulus holds still, making sure she hasn't woken up, eventually relaxing and burying his face in her hair.
At least as she sleeps, she still desires him.
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mochegato · 3 years ago
Text
The Night of the Consequences
Continuation of Well, Well, Well, If It Isn’t the Consequences of My Actions
“Ladybug!”
Ladybug’s eyes widened, recognizing the voice booming through the Watchtower halls without even having to turn around.  She eyed Chloe nervously.  Why did these things keep happening around the nosy blondes in her life?  She turned around with an overly wide smile.  “Oh… hi… um… M.… Wing,” she stuttered out.  
Son of a bitch!  She really should have prepared for this.  She knew it was coming.  Granted, she didn’t know it was coming today, but it had to be coming soon, they couldn’t afford to let just anyone go around knowing their identities.  If the family was really worried, they couldn’t afford to wait to talk to her about… well… her.  
Bee side eyed her with an incredulous stare.  “What the actual fu…” she started quietly.
“Is there something we can help you with?” Ladybug asked loudly, cutting off whatever rant Chloe was going to go on.
“Um well, first off,” he gave her an overly wide, supposedly charming grin, “you can call me Nightwing.  M. Wing is my… father.”  He cringed as he the last word came out.
Bee raised an eyebrow.  “I thought your father was M. Bat.”
Nightwing puckered his lips.  “Yeah… that’s… true.”  He shuffled awkwardly.
“If you’re going to use that line, you’re supposed to say we can call you Night, which I’m not going to do, by the way,” Bee said flippantly and starting to study where her nails would be if she didn’t have gloves on.  “Otherwise it really doesn’t work.”
“Bee!” Ladybug lightly chastised.  She turned to Night… Wing… Nightwing!  She wasn’t calling him Night either.  “Sorry about her.  I’d say she’s just tired, but that would be a lie.”  She ignored Bee’s scoff and continued.  “You said ‘first’, so I assume there’s a second?” she prompted.
“Right, right,” he nodded, finally seeming to settle a bit, his face becoming a bit more determined and the ‘charming’ smile returning.  “I wanted to ask you about someone.  She gave your name as a reference and I just wanted to see if it was someone we could trust.”
Bee leaned over to Ladybug’s ear.  “Why does he keep smiling like that?” she asked in a normal volume.  She shivered dramatically.  “Creepy.”
Ladybug pursed her lips to stop the noise that wanted to escape, some kind of a combination of frustrated whimper and raucous laugh.  “Okay,” Ladybug smiled tightly, focusing entirely on Nightwing. “Who was it?”
“Yeah, a name would be useful here, Smile Boy” Bee added in.  “Or we could just give our opinion on everyone we know, along with a fashion critique.  We can start with your costume history.”
“Bee, didn’t you have something else to do?  Right now?” Ladybug’s voice was sharper than an obsidian edge.  This was her boyfriend’s… future boyfriend’s?... love interest’s?  Yes, love interest’s brother.  She did not need to piss him off while he was asking her as a ‘reliable source’ about her.
“Nope,” Bee smirked back.
Ladybug groaned and turned to Nightwing.  She nodded off to the side.  “Should we…”
Nightwing nodded and followed her over.  “Ugh, whatever.  I didn’t want to hear anyway,” Bee grumbled and walked to get coffee.
“So, the woman I’m asking about is Marinette Dupain-Cheng.  You may have come across her in Paris?” Nightwing prompted.
Ladybug nodded.  “I have yeah. She’s actually…”  She bit her lip.  She really should have planned this better.  How much should she tell him?  Clearly she wasn’t going to say it was her, but maybe she could say she was a part time hero?  Or maybe she could just say they trusted her.  The point was whether she could be trusted with their identities so maybe exposing her identity, one of them anyway, wasn’t the best idea.  Maybe just that she knew their identities and had never told anyone?  That should work, right?  She just had to…
“It’s just,” Nightwing spoke up misinterpreting her silence, “my brother has kind of fallen for her.”  He watched her face carefully when he said it to see if there was any indication of what she thought of the idea.
Ladybug’s eyes bugged out.  That was not the approach she had been expecting.  She thought he’d focus more on the identity aspect more than the personal aspect.  Not to mention ‘fallen’?  That was… they’d only just met.  She knew he liked her but fallen was pretty strong.  Did Jason really feel that way toward her or was Dick… Nightwing just exaggerating?  And she didn’t even think Jason had told him they were seeing each other, let alone how he felt about her!  She looked up and met his expectant eyes.  Oh right, he was waiting on her to respond.  But how did she respond to that?  “Oh?”  Very eloquent.  Her eloquence was clearly not improving around the bats.
His face scrunched as he studied her reaction.  It was definitely odd.  “Yeah. It’s kind of bizarre really.  Not to say anything bad about Marinette,” he rushed to assure her.  “I don’t know her well enough to judge her, obviously.  That’s why I’m here asking you about her.  But he’s really taken with her really quickly.  I’ve never seen him like this.”  He suddenly stopped and his eyes blew wide.  “Oh God!  Don’t tell her that.  Jason’ll kill me if he finds out.”
“Oh… um…” she looked away suddenly trying to hide her sudden blush and searched for a way to answer.
“Oh my god, y… Dupain-Cheng bagged another hero?” Bee exclaimed slapping Ladybug on the shoulder with her elbow and handing her one of the cups in her hands.
“Bee!” Ladybug exclaimed.  “I thought you didn’t care!  What are you doing here?”
“This is the thanks I get after bringing you tea?” she scoffed in pretend offence.
Ladybug rolled her eyes and let out a long suffering sigh.  “This is just water.”  She brought the cup to her lips.  “Not even hot water!  You brought me a cup of tepid water.”
“Oh my God, can’t you just be grateful I thought about bringing you tea?” Bee exclaimed, exasperation clear in her tone.
Ladybug gave her a deadpan expression.  “Did you though?”
“No, not really,” she shrugged.  “Let’s get back to Dupain-Cheng somehow managing to entice yet another hero though,” she continued, malicious glee sparkling in her eyes.
Ladybug’s mouth dropped in offense.  “She does not date a lot of heroes,” she rushed to assure Nightwing. “Only the one, really…”  She paused and looked at who she was talking to and her eyes widened in realization.  “… not that there’s anything wrong with dating a lot of superheroes… if that’s… um… what you want to do,” she finished weakly.
Bee snickered at the flustered cover-up.  “Yeah, she’s not like some heroes that date everyone they shake hands with.”
Nightwing gave an offended scoff.  “I have not dated that many people… or heroes.”
Bee scoffed.  “Maybe not that are officially sanctioned by the JL.”
“We didn’t say that you did,” Ladybug promised, “did we Bee?” she hissed at Bee through gritted teeth.  “And even if you had, there’s nothing wrong with that.  Right, Bee?  Because there’s nothing wrong with dating around.  Is there?”
“No,” Bee groused.  She crossed her arms over her chest and pouted for a moment before the pout became a vicious grin.  “Yeah, sure, we can stop talking about his dating history.  So, anyway, back to Dupain-Cheng…”
“Oh fu… I can’t believe I walked right into that,” Ladybug grumbled into her hands.
“It may be just the one she actually dated.  The rest just have wet dreams about her.”  She smirked at her.
“Bee!” Ladybug exclaimed her cheeks rapidly turning a dark scarlet.
“Relax, I know you and Dupain-Cheng have a… unique relationship, but that doesn’t change facts.  And pretending like she isn’t getting lusty looks from other people doesn’t change it either.”  Bee rolled her eyes and took a sip of her coffee.  The cup wasn’t nearly big enough to hide her widening smirk.  “You’re just going to have to suck it up.”
Nightwing perked up at that comment.  Well, that was an interesting tidbit.  “So you must know Marinette very well considering you know her dating history so well.”
Ladybug nodded while still glaring at Bee.  “Yes.  You could say that.  We know each other rather well.”
“Extremely well,” Bee agreed, her grin getting even sharper.  “I’ve known her since we were children but Ladybug still knows her much more intimately than I do.  Why don’t you tell him about her?”
“And I would trust her,” Ladybug continued over Bee.  “I have trusted her with a lot, both in and out of the suit.”
Bee cackled at the answer “Yeah LB do tell.  Go on about her amazing attributes.  Tell us all about her.”
“Bee,” Ladybug whined, her cheeks heating up.  Nightwing observed the interaction with a raised eyebrow.
“Come on, he’s going to think you don’t like Dupain-Cheng,” Bee teased.
“What! No!”  Ladybug straightened quickly, her eyes going wide.  “I do!  I like Dup… Marinette,” she glared quickly at Bee before she whipped back to face Nightwing with wide eyes.  “She’s great! She’s ama… She’s…” she faltered.  This was so awkward.  If she and Jason ended up getting serious, Nightwing was eventually going to know who she was and remember what she said here and if she overplayed it, he’d think she was pompous and hate her.  Then his whole family would hate her and Jason would break up with her because his family would convince him she was a terrible influence.
But! But if she wasn’t complimentary enough he’d think she didn’t like… herself and that she wasn’t trustworthy. Then he would convince Jason that it was a mistake to be with her and he’d break up with her because he’d trust his family’s word over hers and think she wasn’t a good person and deserved to be miserable.  She looked back up at Nightwing with a sigh.  “She’s a good person.  She deserves to be happy.”
Nightwing stared into her eyes for a few moments as if trying to read a part of her soul.  Finally, his eyes softened to a more sympathetic glint.  “I was worried about her knowing our identities but I’m mostly worried about him.  He’s been through a lot and he can be pretty hot and cold because of it and I just…”
Ladybug’s eyes softened too.  She looked down for a moment trying to figure out how to word her response.  “She’s… Marinette’s pretty understanding.  She’s had to deal with that before and it didn’t work then but… I don’t think that was on her…”  She pursed her lips and looked down while the memories washed over her. When she looked back up there was a bittersweet look in her eyes.  “She fights for the people she loves.  She puts effort in.  If you’re asking if I would trust her with an identity, I have before and she’s never let me down.  If you’re asking me if I would trust her with your brother’s heart, I would.  Whether it works out with him or not, she’ll still be there for him.  She’ll do everything in her power to protect it.  If you trust me, you can trust her.”
Nightwing reached out and squeezed her shoulder.  “Thank you.  This has been very helpful.  I’m sorry if I brought up any bad memories.”
Ladybug shook her head.  “No, it’s fine.  I hope I made you feel less worried about her.”
Nightwing nodded.  “You did. Thanks again.”
“You’re welcome,” Bee interjected loudly.  “Even though you didn’t ask me my opinion.”
“Sorry.  I hadn’t been given your name as a reference,” Nightwing said with only the tiniest touch of condescension.  
“I grew up with her,” Bee scoffed.  “And even though you didn’t ask, I’ll tell you my opinion anyway.”
“Bee…” Ladybug started, but her voice was tired.
“I don’t know who your brother is, but whoever he is…”  Ladybug sighed deeply and dropped her head.  “…he isn’t good enough for her.”  Ladybug’s head snapped up and her jaw dropped.
“Are you… are you admitting you like m… Marinette?”  Ladybug gaped.
“Relax, I’m not like hitting on her or anything.  I’m just...  Shut up.” She crossed her arms over her chest and looked away with a pout.  After a few seconds she looked back at Ladybug from the corner of her eye and rolled her eyes.  “Close your mouth, LB.  There probably aren’t flies here to fly in, but Beast Boy could always be transformed as a fly for whatever ridiculous reason and if you swallow him we can’t go on our date.”  
“You’re dating Beast Boy?  When did that happen?” Ladybug exclaimed.
Bee grabbed Ladybug’s arm and tugged her back in the direction they had been heading originally.  “I was trying to tell you before we were so rudely interrupted.”
Nightwing watched them walk away with a smile and a small wave.  That was a lot to take in, but at least now he knew she was trustworthy.
<><><><><> 
Marinette had just gotten home and immediately collapsed into her bed after an extremely long and wearing day when he heard an incessant pounding at the door that wouldn't stop.  “What the hell,” she groaned.  She pushed herself off the bed with a great deal of effort and shuffled to the front door. “Somebody better be about to die,” she grumbled to herself, “or someone’s going to be.”  She looked through the peep hole to see a frantic looking Jason. 
She whipped open the door for him.  “Jason! Are you okay?”  She reached to check him over to assure herself he was okay.
Jason stared at her for just a second.  “Dick just… He said… You slept with Ladybug!  She’s the one you dated?” he yelled.
Marinette blinked at him a few times trying to take in what he just said.  “What!?”
Continued in Truth so Cold
Tags:
@jasonette-july-event @maribatserver @ashbrea381writings
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headgehug · 3 years ago
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my disco elysium tier list / character opinions, below the cut, in no particular order, includes spoilers, very rambly lol.
Alice DeMettrie: lovely voice, as a phone girl i aspire to be like her
Judit (HFW) and Jean: um.. I guess I haven’t interacted with them enough to really enjoy their characters. I think Jean is hilarious and because of the fandom I feel bad for the poor guy.
Kim: couldn’t help but feel for Kim exactly how Harry feels for him, enough said?
Trant: made me mad that he wouldn’t let the kid learn about whatever he wanted to learn about
Gary, the Cryptofascist: dude has the coolest job in the world and isn’t even into it… come on.
Klaasje: girl… maybe it was having to go through a half-hour of loading screens to talk to her, or the way she was yanking my chain (and everyone else's), but I thought she was just sad. You have to wonder after a certain point why it is that trouble follows a person around so closely.
Garte: malewife material alert! I hope, by the end of the game, that he no longer thought of me as just his worst customer ever, but his worst customer ever who was also not too bad of a guy. The bit where he said he realized he didn’t care if he lived or died, the way he is so devoted to the Whirling even if it is truly doomed… damn.
Lena: on one hand, I’m annoyed with her husband for leaving her alone so much. On the other? The way he chases this cryptid just because he believes in her story? That’s sweet. But i think they should find a way for her to come along, because she obviously misses him, and it’s not about the discovery for her, it’s about the journey. Anyways, what a sweet woman. She should write children’s books, i think.
Annette & Plaisance: I thought Annette’s conversation was very bittersweet, but it didn’t necessarily get me too invested. Her mom was funny. idk.
Leo: Leo! Honestly, I talked to Leo every time I went to see the big guy in the box. Literally, the big man, physically, and big man, as in the man in charge. I talked to Leo every time I went to see him. What a great guy, honestly. That is, not necessarily Evrart, the guy in the box, even though he’s alright, for sure! But this time, I meant Leo. Leo is just a great guy, and I enjoyed talking to him. I was so sad asking him to keep it snappy, but I was thrilled when he did not let me being in a rush slow him down in the least. Truly, all in all, one of the greatest souls in Martinaise. Oh, that Leo. What a guy.
Frittte girl: i love her voice so much and i catch myself talking out loud like her just for fun… honestly what an icon! she doesn’t know and she doesn’t care.
Gaston & Rene: loved their voices so much! And their relationship, ugh. And the ending, ugh. 10/10 would play boulle with them again and let them bitch about me for years after. You ever compete for a girl when it’s secretly the other guy you’re in love with? And then hang out with him for decades, never sharing a kind word, and then sit and stare in silence after he literally works himself to death out of loyalty to a country that never loved him as much as he loved it? yeah…
Paledriver: i mean, if somebody bothered me when i was clearly lost in thought, i would probably also be as cryptic and snipey as possible.
Joyce: meant so much to me the way she went across the bay. I love all the subtle symbolism in the game, for sure. Hope she quits her job.
Tommy Le Homme: oh… poor guy, what a romantic doormat. He was disappointed in me and it made me disappointed in myself.
Call Me Mañana: very cool and chill dude. Enjoyed how much he didn’t get involved.
Evrart Claire: ugh.. You know a character is good when you really just hate his guts. Gross guy… does some good, when the good benefits him as well. That’s usually how it is.
Measurehead: i was like… what? And… huh? His voice was really good though.
Ruby, the Instigator: hmmm. I think for all of the build up around her, it was very nice to see her as a roughed up, scared woman. Honestly, I think she is a very interesting counterpoint to Klaasje: both of them are followed by trouble, but Ruby seems to handle it with actions while Klaasje handles it with words. Is there some kind of commentary to be had there about how Klaasje studied lit while Ruby drove a lorry, how Klaasje essentially let everything about her drown while Ruby kept it close in her diary? Yeah probably etc etc
Elizabeth Beaufort: beautiful voice as well. Would love to know more about her backstory, and the way she protects the boys while keeping them at arm's length, to protect herself and them.
Titus Hardie: poor guy. Good heart. Hope he comes into his own, after everything.
Cindy the SKULL: loved her voice so much. Really wanted to impress her with my art. Not sure that i’m cool enough to ever achieve that. If i was a streetrat ne’er do well i’d have a crush on her too.
Cleaning Lady: I wanted to ask if she was okay. Who takes care of her?
Cuno: fandom kind of encapsulates the way I feel about him. Pure of heart, dumb of ass? I love any kid that can give a grown man a run for his money.
Cunoesse: oh… i don’t know if i want to know her full story or not. Cuno is alright, but that poor kid… she needs some help. You can’t rehabilitate every feral cat.
Smoker on the Balcony: good mysterious throw away homo-sexual awakening character. Distracted by his shirt being open. What did he say?
Sunday Friend: unfortunately too distracted by a hot guy’s skimpy outfits laying around to really pay attention to what he was talking about.
Don't Call Abigail / The Pigs (my reaction was the same so i’m combining them): oh lord. That was sad.
Idiot Doom Spiral: #cringe. Awesome character. Wheedled me out of several bottles of algul.
Lilienne Carter: love of my life, what a lady. Does she know she casually carries the courage of kings?
Acele: I really love her conversation and her backstory once you go back and talk to Evrart about her. I was a little distracted by how much I loved Egg and Noid but i care about her and i am so, so ridiculously happy that i was able to give her a nice warm beanie <3 she deserves a happy family and I hope she finds it there.
Egg Head (& Dolores Dei): I’m probably not going to explain the way I feel about Egg properly but I haven’t really seen this take anywhere else yet so I’m going to try! Even from just his portrait, I get such a strong correlation between him and Dolores. The way she “appeared out of time” and he just appeared to the other speedfreaks on the road. Not to mention the way he literally has the glowing lungs, her symbol, on his belt buckle. Like Dolores, he’s socially isolated, despite being with a few close friends, in that he hardly says anything of real value. His role as party boy, master of ceremonies, hype man, is similar to the way Dolores Dei was a leader to her own following, if you think of being a Queen’s advisor as being her personal emcee, subtly guiding and sensing discreet changes in the political mood. Finally, and this is what makes me the most emotional, is the way he is on the small church stage/raised area, but still very much near where the crowd would be. Considering how boisterous I can imagine anodic dance raves could get, i’d assume the crowd would be right up and around him, or at least very close. He is amongst his people, unlike how the stained glass figure of Dolores towered above them, cold and distant, detached. He has a sort of innocence about him that many other characters don’t have, a wholehearted belief in the power of love to solve everything. Like with any religious pursuit, it takes patience and intuition to truly speak to him. That’s hardcore, man.
Noid: oh gosh, I could talk to that guy all day. Everything he said made me stop and think for a good while. So comfortable with himself, so sure of things, honestly in sync with the world around him.
Andre: You know, he’s got good friends and he’s a good leader for them. Didn’t particularly interest me otherwise.
Soona, the Programmer: she’s got a great heart and a lot of patience. I think the kids will grow on her.
Tiago: obsessed with this guy. Just… good for him.
Mega Rich Light-Bending Guy: mind = blown
Harry: well. There really isn’t much to say that wouldn’t take me a long time and that someone else hasn’t already said better. What a wonderful player character.
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mingying · 3 years ago
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[spoilers] hosplay season 2 ep3 - ikjun/songhwa
I am on cloud nine. 
When I posted my theories about ep 1 two weeks ago, never would I have expected such a huge development to happen 2 episodes after! This episode is what I will describe as Songhwa’s preliminary realisation, and the catalyst for this is told through the perspectives of two people in this episode. 
TL;DR: This is a sign that Ikjun and Songhwa are now positively moving in the direction of endgame!!!
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cr: _fever_pitch @ twitter 
This scene made me smile so hard! While Songhwa may have asked Ikjun for dinner because she wanted to ask him about DLL, the fact that she initiated it by literally using Ikjun’s iconic “let’s eat” line, speaks a lot. I love the way Ikjun’s face lighted up in an instant when he realised it’s Songhwa.
What I realised also is that he even invited Junwan to eat with them in the cafeteria - maybe he didn’t want to burden Songhwa since they would be alone? Or maybe he was just trying to protect his own heart, we cannot be too sure but definitely, Ikjun-ah, best boi you, best boi. 
The next scene that comes is definitely one scene that highlights their dynamics as work partners. Other than the fact that Ikjun knew Songhwa was worried over something and asked her to just speak up just by looking at her stirring her food, it seems that Ikjun/Songhwa approach things in a somewhat similar wavelength.
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Ikjun points out at once that “we can help them”, to which Songhwa confirms saying that she already told them they could. 
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When Ikjun says that it doesn’t matter if the patients do it in a different hospital in Seoul because DLL can still provide financial support - Songhwa replies “I told them that”. 
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And when Songhwa said DLL will contact Yulje, because the other university hospitals aren’t willing to take the case, Ikjun agreed and said “good”.
Ugh, I absolutely love their rapport here. It shows understanding and compatibility between two friends who clearly share the same opinions about certain things and I love that they’re working together for DLL.
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Ms Songhwa saying this line just shows that she values and trusts Ikjun’s judgement. Just as how she whole heartedly believed him when he told her that a “Villain” is someone who works hard to pay bills (BUAHAHA I can’t wait for her to realise the truth and strangle Ikjun).
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Ma’am, why do you look like him as he is leaving like he is your entire world?
Coughs. Moving on!
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Heo Seonbin~~ Just like how long have you observed your Professor and her best friend that you’re able to form this sort of conclusion that he always makes her laugh and that he will ‘totally’ do it for her if she asks?
Of course, this whole fake dating thing didn’t materialise because Songhwa isn’t the type to go for that - plus she respects Ikjun’s feelings, I’m sure, so she wouldn’t want to put him in that sort of confusing situation after knowing how he feels for her. 
But I have a strong feeling that this scene is strategically placed for a reason and that is to nudge Songhwa towards the realisation that other people are seeing something special between them despite her insistence many times that they’re just friends. And who is the best to tell her that other than Seonbin, who is practically the closest friend that she has at this point that isn’t part of her gang.
In the previous episode, I posted a theory from a kfan that Ikjun was the one who asked for Seokmin’s favour to scrub in the Violinist’s surgery to ease Songhwa’s burden, and that the strawberry cake Seonbin brought for Songhwa towards the end of the ep, was actually bought by Ikjun. This theory remains as a theory until proven otherwise but I live for the fact that SilverDragon may be the ones playing cupid for their Professor this season. I mean, Songhwa did play cupid for them in S1, right?
Kekeke, now, onto my favourite scene of the episode. Kyuhyung’s cameo as Gyeongjin’s brother! I still cannot believe we got this scene handed to us on a silver platter but dude, it’s a complete parallel to IkSong and I absolutely LIVE for Songhwa’s expressions during Hanyang’s (I’ll just call him that) story telling.
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Songhwa drank her coffee twice - girlie probably felt so called out that she was flustered and had to busy her hands with something. That’s human tendency, anyway. And we know from EP 1 that her rejection didn’t address Ikjun’s confession in its entirety. So for Hanyang to say “my answer didn’t make sense,” could very well be what Songhwa had in the back of her mind after her rejection, or what she will now realise moving forward.
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“As a man and a woman, not just friends.”
A foreshadow, I hope? Because I am betting that this entire scene will play out in Songhwa’s mind over and over again. He is the catalyst she needs at this point of time to realise that the risk is worth taking.
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The best line ever. It’s so simple yet so profound. So realistic, too. Because we know exactly who it is that is capable of making Songhwa feel happy. It’s the one person that always makes her laugh. And what more do you need, honestly?
What struck me, as I’ve mentioned on Twitter, is that the scene could have just ended after Hanyang said this line - that being with his gf makes him happy/great. But instead, we got a follow up question from him in that he quite literally ASKED her straight up, if she had someone like that in her life too.
And...guess who showed up at that very moment? Casually, without any hint of jealousy or envy but just decided to stick a straw into his nose?
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cr: milly_v_v @ twitter
And made her laugh...without fail again?
I’m not crying, I swear.
My mind is officially at ease, because it seems that IkSong is definitely now headed towards the right direction. ShinLee really wasn’t joking when he put triple Rainbows during the drive in the tunnel. Triple Rainbow...for three episodes? Kekeke.
I’m thinking that Songhwa may still need one or two more eps to sort out her feelings, but by Ep 6 I’m guessing she will finally take the first step towards a relationship with Ikjun. But hey, I’m always prepared to be surprised in the best ways possible (like this entire scene in Ep3) by ShinLee.
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fangirlovestuff · 4 years ago
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All’s Well that Ends Well - Wanda Maximoff x female!reader
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a/n - hello lovely people!! i wasn’t gonna write another part for this because i didn’t really want to venture into the future with this series since i like the ending i have in water under the bridge, BUT i got this lovely ask and it was an amazing idea and i’m so happy / shocked that people still remember this so here’s another part! i hope you enjoy<3
Summary: a collection of moments in your journey, from Wanda’s eyes. (not moments that appeared in the previous parts!)
Word Count: 2.9k
Warnings: i’m pretty sure none. maybe the faintest alluding to smut you have ever seen but i don’t even know if that counts. also a smidge of angst but not really
read the previous parts: Silver Lining || Water Under The Bridge
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 
Wanda was walking through the long corridors of the compound, a frown on her face, a product of the mission she just came back from. They made it work, but things definitely weren't ideal for a while there. She expected Cap would go over that in the debriefing, the one she was currently making her way to.
Ugh. She liked Steve, appreciated his professional opinion, considered him a friend, most times. But damn it, can't the debriefing wait until she had something to eat, had a shower, slept?
Apparently not, she scowled as she quickened her steps. The last thing she wanted was to be late for this and get lectured by Steve. More than she's already going to be considering how the mission went.
She felt like banging her head against a wall.
Suddenly, she heard a sweet laugh. "No! The Black Widow herself is addicted to Pop Tarts? Well, that certainly makes me feel better about myself," the voice giggled.
Curious, since she didn't recognize who it was, she couldn't resist sticking her head into the room from which she heard the sounds.
"I'm glad, but it's a secret, so shhhh," Natasha smiled that half-smile half-smirk of hers, the fondness evident in her voice as she put her finger to her plush lips to imply silence. Next to her stood the most beautiful woman Wanda has ever laid eyes on. You were standing next to the black widow, who was considered a symbol for beauty and grace, yet Wanda found herself unable to take her eyes of off you.
"Oh, hi!" you smiled once you saw someone had entered the room.
"Hey," Wanda smiled timidly as she opened the door a bit wider.
"Wanda," Natasha smiled at her. To the untrained eye, she seemed completely normal, just as she did a moment ago, but Wanda thought she could see the faintest hint of surprised irritation in her eyes. Natasha introduced the two of you, and Wanda's grin went involuntarily wider when you shook her hand warmly.
"Lovely to meet you," you grinned.
"Likewise. Natasha, I thought you'd like to know we all came back from the mission, Carol included," she raised her eyebrow slightly.
"Carol?" you asked. "Oh! Captain Marvel? Oh my god, Captain Marvel's here?" your eyes went almost comically wide as you connected the dots.
"Yeah," Wanda chuckled. "She is. But she's gonna be a bit occupied for the next hour or so, since Steve insisted we do a debriefing now, which is just where I should be going if I don't wanna be late. I'll see you around," she said in what she hoped was a friendly tone and not too high pitched.
As she walked to the meeting room, even faster than she was walking before, her mind wandered to you. You looked so… energized. God, she wished that was her. She sighed and accepted her fate, entering the room.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Hey, Wanda!" Wanda heard you calling after her a few days after you got to the compound. She was just on her way to the training room, but he figured talking to you for a few minutes wouldn't hurt. If she could keep her mouth shut about her little crush, that is.
"What's up?" she turned around, waiting for you to catch up to her.
"Well, I just saw you and I figured I'd say hi," you smiled, "trying to get to know everyone and such. How are you?"
"I'm great! How are you? I mean, how's settling in and all? I know from experience that can be a little daunting," Wanda smiled sympathetically.
"I guess," you giggled, and Wanda really hoped she was only giving you internal heart eyes and not external ones. "but so far so good. I mean, everyone's just so nice. Just the other day Carol offered to help me train. Oh my god, I still can't believe I'm on first name basis with Captain Marvel!" you laughed.
Wanda hoped her disappointment didn't show on her face. "That's great!"
"Yeah, it's really awesome. Anyways, I'm sure you have better things to do, so um, I'll leave you to it," you said, that gorgeous smile never leaving your face.
Which was unfair really, since it definitely made Wanda's brain cells leave her head. Maybe that's why the next thing she said was, "Oh well, not really, I was going to go train for a while, but if you want maybe you could come with me. I'm no Carol but I'm not that bad either," she chuckled.
"Really?" your eyes lit up.
Needless to say, Wanda didn't get a lot of training time done that day. She spent most of it staring at you, so she could "um… correct your, uh, technique," as she so elegantly put it when you asked her if she didn't want to train as well.
It wasn't her fault you looked so pretty.
Per your request, she did show you a couple of things using her powers when you were finished. Your squeal of delight when she lifted up a super heavy weight bench made her cheeks blush slightly.
"That's so cool! So, can you like, read my thoughts or something?" you asked.
"I can," she smirked when you gaped at her. "but don't worry, I don't. I made a habit not to look into other people's minds when I don't absolutely have to."
"That's good to know," you grinned at her, your eyes shining with mirth.
She tried to remind herself she didn't stand a chance, she didn't even know if you liked girls, and even if you did she was no Carol or Natasha, but to no avail. No matter how much she repeated it, even after the three of you got together, she couldn't stop herself from falling a little more in love every time she saw you.
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Bucky and Wanda were an unlikely duo. Pretty much everyone agreed on that. Except for Steve.
"I think you two have more in common than you'd like to admit," he had smiled. When they asked him what he meant, he simply mimed locking his mouth up and throwing the key. "If you don't know, I'm not going to tell you."
They both knew what he meant, of course. The abnormal strength, fighting for the wrong side. They both made their mistakes, grew to be better. They never talked about it, not really. But when a sound made Bucky's jaw clench a certain way, or a mission was especially draining, or Wanda saw something that brought more memories of home than she'd like, they were there for each other. Actions, not words, but they understood.
Right now, Bucky greeted Wanda as she entered the kitchen on a chilly morning.
"So, you hear about the new trouple?" Bucky asked her, handing her a mug of tea he made because he knew she needed it in the mornings.
"Trouple?" Wanda frowned, before sipping her tea and humming gratefully at him.
"Well, like a couple but… three," Bucky chuckled awkwardly. "Tony said that."
"Oh, um… no, I guess I didn't," she shrugged.
He explained that you were dating Nat and Carol. "It took me a minute to register it too, so I get it," he smiled at her expression.
"No, I mean, I totally get it. That was fast," she raised her eyebrows. When he didn't reply, she continued, "I hope they'll end up well. For the team, you know," she shrugged, gulping before taking another sip of her tea.
"Hey," Bucky laid a comforting hand on her shoulder. "I know you liked her."
"Which her?" she quipped back. He just gave her a look and she sighed, her shoulders slumping. "Yeah. But I mean, she's with two of the most powerful women in the world. The universe, probably. I can't exactly compete with that," she shrugged helplessly.
"Wanda, you're amazing. I hope you know that," Bucky said, his eyes sincere.
"I guess," she smiled at him.
"Wanna go eat ice cream and watch a sappy movie?"
"You know me so well," she giggled and magicked the fridge open, sending two tubs flying into her hands, as well as two spoons from the drawer.
"Showoff," he scoffed, taking one from her outreached hand.
"You love it," she winked, drawing a chuckle from him.
"Yeah, yeah. Let's go watch that movie of yours, young lady."
She laughed and followed him out of the kitchen.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After the breakup, Wanda was getting closer and closer to you. She didn't want to be a rebound, but also… she just couldn't resist. But, her intentions were purely platonic. For now, at least.
At first, you didn't want to talk to her about it. She understood, didn't push. She knew you needed time.
And indeed, after a couple of days, she heard a knock on her door. She used her magic to open it since she was on her bed, going over some files, which she immediately discarded once she saw you, the state you were in. You have clearly been crying, the tear tracks evident on your face, your quiet sniffle reaching her ears.
"What's wrong?" she asked, gesturing for you to come sit down with her.
You sat down and took a deep breath. She wrapped her arms around you, pulling your head to rest on her shoulder. That's what made you break down again. In the comfort of her arms, you felt safe enough to cry, to fall apart.
She started to pull away when she felt your shivers, but stopped when you clung to her tighter, letting your tears flow freely. She just stroked your hair gently, letting you cry as much as you needed, mumbling reassurances.
When you calmed down enough, you raised your head. "I'm sorry," you mumbled, averting your bloodshot eyes from hers.
"No, don't apologize. I'm here," she nudged your shoulder, prompting you to meet her gaze. "What's wrong?"
"I just… I guess it took a couple of days until it felt real. Until I realized…" you cleared your throat. "I- Wanda, I've been dating them for the absolute most of the time I've been an Avenger. What if… what if I don't have a place in the team without them? What if I'm not strong enough without them?"
"Don't think that, not even for a second," she squeezed your shoulder. "You are one of the most powerful people I know. You belong here, in this team. I've seen you fight, and you're incredible. You're strong, you're smart. All of that has nothing, absolutely nothing to do with them. I know losing them may hurt, but that hurt doesn't change who you are."
"Thank you," you said. It wasn't enough, so you wrapped your arms around her, squeezing her tight, hoping she'd understand.
"It's the truth," she said, stern but not harsh.
That night, after you left, with plans to hang out tomorrow, she took a couple of deep breaths, calmed herself down. If she didn't, she was sure she'd go out there and kick the asses of two of her extremely stupid teammates.
Okay, they weren't actually stupid. But at that moment, Wanda was ready to hurt them, only for making you feel like this. Like you needed them. Seeing you like this made her want to blast them both into oblivion.
But you'd be fine, and you certainly didn't need her to interfere in your business. Besides, she got caught up thinking about the smile you gave her before you left.
She'd move planets to see that smile as often as possible.
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Wanda smiled when she saw you approaching, your swimsuit wet since you had already jumped in the water. Because of course, Tony had a pool in the compound, and of course, he insisted everyone would come together at least one day a year and "bond". Honestly, the man was a bit of a sap. Not that Wanda minded, if it gave her opportunities for sights like these, she mused as she looked at you above her sunglasses.
"Having fun?" she asked once you were close enough to hear her.
You smiled. "Yeah. But you know what would be even more fun? If my lovely girlfriend will join me in a game of chicken against two annoying super soldiers? Maybe, you know, work your magic?" you batted your eyelashes at her innocently.
"Are you asking me to help you cheat so you can make Steve drop Bucky from his shoulders and you would win?" she chuckled.
"No! I mean, maybe. Ugh, his shoulders are so big Wanda, it's unfair! Bucky has so much more space than I do! Clint can't hold me properly," you grumbled half heartedly at your teammate. "But if I hold you up on my shoulders, and you'd, you know," you gestured in a way that was supposed to be similar to how she uses her magic, but only made her giggle at your antics, "I really think we can win."
"Alright, I'm convinced," Wanda announced, pulling off her sundress and revealing her swimsuit so she can get in the pool. "But only because I'd love to see Bucky's face when he falls into the pool and ruins his hair. Steve wouldn't hear the end of it either," she giggled. "Come on, let's go," she said as she started walking towards the pool.
"Babe?" she turned back to find you staring at her.
"Yeah?" you said, shaking your head a little.
"Are you coming?" she smirked.
"Oh, I dunno, I think I was in the sun for a long time, it's getting kinda hot. Maybe we should go inside, cool down a little, and I could kiss you, and-"
You got cut off by Wanda pressing her lips to yours gently. "Now come on," she smirked when you parted, "we have a pair of super soldier asses to kick."
And you did indeed kick their asses. Even without using her magic, Wanda managed to knock Bucky off with you balancing on one leg and using the other one to kick Steve under the water, making him lose enough of his balance.
You both laughed when Bucky and Steve went out of the water, Bucky complaining about his ruined hair and, "God Steve, I pulled you out of the river and you drop me in the pool?"
"I'm pretty sure you were the reason I ended up in that river in the first place," Steve snarked back. When Bucky opened his mouth to protest, Steve continued, "And I’d fall into that river for you again if I had to. Besides, your hair looks just fine," he smiled sweetly at Bucky, who stopped glaring daggers at him and was instead giving him the usual heart eyes.
"Punk," Bucky muttered as Steve went out of the pool. He extended his hand to help Bucky out, who instead pulled on his arm and made him fall into the water at him.
"Jerk," Steve shook the water from his hair before picking Bucky up and getting them both out of the pool as Bucky laughed.
You and Wanda looked at them with a smile.
"I'm glad they're happy," she said, moving her hands in the water in slow motions.
"They deserve it. You do too," you told her sincerely.
"I am happy," she smiled. "You make me happy," she cupped your cheek in her hand, and you kissed her sweetly.
"You make me happy too," you said, "the happiest."
Later, when you were all gathered around an outdoor table, it somehow ended up with you and Wanda sitting across from Natasha and Carol. Now at first, Wanda half considered being rude and asking to switch with someone.
But then she realized, maybe this isn't so bad.
"Hey baby, can you pass me that salad?" she asked you, sneaking a side look at Nat and Carol. They were talking between them, but the way they tensed up let her know they were paying attention. Good.
"Sure thing," you reached or the salad she gestured at, passing it.
"Thank you," she grinned, planting a firm but sweet kiss on your lips.
You hummed in delight. "Not that I'm complaining, but what was that for?"
"For passing me the salad," she shrugged with a smile.
You let it go, not thinking anything of it, but Wanda snuck another look across the table, and sure enough, Carol's jaw was tightly clenched, while Natasha was looking down at her plate, moving her food around as if she lost her appetite.
It wasn't as good as kicking their asses, but it would do. She barely managed to contain the smug grin that threatened to spread across her face. Having you to herself was more than enough, it was everything she could've ever wanted.
But, having your ex-girlfriends realize what they lost? Well, it certainly didn't hurt.
She didn't do it a lot, didn’t brag or show you off around them most times. But every now and then, she couldn't help herself, because you deserved it. She knew you'd probably never really confront them about how they made you feel, so when she could, she subtly did it for you.
You didn’t deserve what they put you through. No, you deserved the world, you deserved to smile and laugh and be happy and loved. Wanda hoped she could be that, give you that, for the rest of your lives.
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tell me your thoughts!! i couldn’t help but make stevebucky date because i love them hehe. the little look into Wanda’s friendship with Bucky was really fun too, i felt like i sorta alluded to it in the previous ones but yeah, anyways i love them and i hope you liked it<3
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thefeedress · 4 years ago
Text
FFA MUSINGS
I was 17 when I learned the terms "feeder" "feedee" and "feederism" from stumbling across one of those trash documentaries about the kink. Apparently, my sexuality revolved around extremes and predators: creepy straight men coercing naive women into transforming their bodies and their lives - the women didn't particularly seem to be getting off on it or even have much agency in the whole thing. The men were awful. (Sometimes, these days, I look back and wonder how much all the negatives of what I saw were exaggerated by the editing…)
That was my lightbulb moment, where I discovered the label for something very personal and private that I'd had all my life but always felt confused and ashamed about. I now also had the pleasure of feeling extra disgusting and very alone, having been shown what horrible company I was in, and that I now knew I was a feeder, but apparently all feeders were men.
Any furtive investigations online (in the reasonably early days of the internet) seem to confirm this suspicion: female feeders were not A Thing, there might possibly be one or two others out there at best. Male gainers only seemed to exist in their own niche in gay subculture, and although I was happy they were out there somewhere living their best lives, they were obviously Not For Me.
I was 34 when after years of pushing it all to the back of my mind, I finally gave in. I've been with the same (non-feedist) partner since my early 20s, so I just assumed that I'd never be able to explore it irl anyway, and that was that. I can't remember what happened or why I decided that I had to try to find some others to connect with, even just to chat with, but in the end (with my partner's blessing) I found and joined Feabie (of which I have many opinions but I'll leave those for another time…) and interacted with other feedists online for the first time in my life.
Guess what: straight male feedees exist. They exist, and there's fucking loads of them!! Tons of the buggers in my inbox all day every day for weeks. Pretty heady experience going from outcast freak to Much Sought After Item - apparently female feeders really are quite rare, or we don't have much of an online presence (or most of us are lurking in a secret lair somewhere that the others haven't invited me to, rude….) or they're also out there somewhere thinking they're the only one.
The unbridled glee of feeling popular and desirable for being something I'd always felt ashamed of did wear off a teensy bit after the endless onslaught of "hey" "hi" "how u" "ayy babygurl" "I'm looking for a feeder please accommodate all my kinks even though I'm a total stranger and I clearly don't give a shit about you as a human being" "You're a woman on the internet I'm entitled to your attention don't be difficult what's your problem" and my current favourite, the bizarrely ominous "Can I ask ur opinion?" (The answer is no my friend, if I wanted to be spammed with anonymous torso pics that I'm meant to manufacture comments about that you can get off to I'd have asked YOU.)
But. I'm still completely overjoyed that male feedees exist, that I've spoken to so many cool and interesting and lovely guys, that I've had experiences I'd always assumed I wouldn't, that I FINALLY MET OTHER FFAs and they are awesome and now I'm close friends with one and it's freaking GREAT. All of this has also lead my partner and I to discover polyamory and now I'm in love with two people who love me back NOBODY EVER SAID YOU WERE ALLOWED TO DO THAT WHY THE FUCK DID NO ONE TELL ME
There are so many nuances and preferences I'd never considered. I knew what I liked and that's what I sought out in terms of porn and that was that. Actually talking to feedees and learning about the whole spectrum of things they each did or didn't enjoy or want to participate in was a revelation, and also helped me clarify my own preferences myself.
There are still things I've yet to come to terms with or decide how to feel about. The main things I'd always felt guilty or ashamed of were less to do with fat or fat guys, it was the feeding itself.
Where being an FFA is concerned - I like to think that if I'd ever been lucky enough to have a fat boyfriend when I was younger, I wouldn't have been shallow enough to care what anyone else thought. It's possible I'm giving my younger self too much credit; I know for certain that some people in my life would have made nasty comments, I was also hugely insecure myself, and I have no idea what it really would have been like. I have no doubt that living all my life in a fatphobic society has affected me in more ways than I'm even aware of (same as everyone else in some way, I'm guessing....). I think any uneasiness I felt there was less worrying about shallow friends or family members, and more how to find potential fat partners without offending them. I have always been conscious of the fact that the majority of fat people would very likely be horrified to be thought of and objectified through the lens of this fetish. You never know what someone's relationship to their own body is, but it's safe to bet that it's a more complex one than it seems, and also, unless you're expressly invited into that relationship by that person, it's none of your fucking business.
But anyway, the main reason I never had many hangups about it was that I don't think I even *was* attracted to fat people when I was young - sometimes I'm not sure I was even attracted to anyone. I had crushes on boys all the time, but I never thought of anyone sexually. My teenage fantasies were pure belly kink: stuffing, chugging, bloating, inflation, any kind of ridiculous fantasy belly expansion - the actual fattening aspect of feeding was less a part of it, and fancying fat dudes was never connected to it. By the time I'd begun to join the dots and wonder if I liked fat boys, I'd started to happen across media that portrays the worst of Feedism, and since I liked sadistic fucked up stuff and already felt ashamed of it, all of that just confirmed to me that I was right to hate myself. Even now, when I'm exposed to much more conversation about this kink than I ever used to be, I notice a lot of love for soft feedism, wholesome fatness appreciation, body positivity, romance (all of which I absolutely love, don't get me wrong) and I still sometimes feel Iike I'm being left out of the party. Keeping my fingers crossed for more consensual femdom-feedism love (and content, ugh…)
But… what would have happened if I hadn't gotten the fuck over myself and put myself out there, tried to find others? How many other young people see themselves portrayed horribly in the media and hide parts of themselves FROM THEMSELVES forever? What happens next? I've apparently found the one person who likes all the same twisted things I do, but actually getting to see him irl ever or do any of the things we want to do seems impossible, and not just because of Covid.
This fetish is lonely for most of us I think, in some way or another. There aren't many feedists, there don't seem to be as many female feeders or male feedees, there probably aren't many people who will share the same preferences within the fetish that you do, and frankly when you filter out the people who aren't crazy or creepy or don't know how to hold a conversation, the pool shrinks even further. I've seen plenty of posts bemoaning how hard it is to find someone, but seriously, having spent most of my life in a vacuum where this stuff is concerned, I'm still buzzing from having engaged with the small handful of people I've engaged with, even just to chat to.
What I want to say to my younger self is: you're a good person. You're just a kinky bitch, that's all.
I feel like this description probably applies to all the best people, I can live with that.
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