#u guys need to tel me these things | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

shop-korea · 2 years ago

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Watch "Best Things To Do In Cancun Mexico 2023" on YouTube

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WARNING - UNITED STATES - DANGEROUS -

WARNING - ONLY - PLACE - U - HAVE LEFT -

MIAMI - FLORIDA - BECAUSE - NO - STATE -

TAX - AND - FEDERAL - TAXES - CHARGED -

PAYCHECK - U - CAN - CLAIM - AT - OTHER -

FORM - SO - YOUR - PAYCHECKS - ARE TAX -

FREE - UNLIKE - FULL - STATES -

CALIFORNIA - LOTS - OF - FOOD -

BUT - NEAR - LAKE - TAHOE - DOGS - ARE -

NOT - ALLOWED - CAN'T - ENJOY - WATER -

AND - TREES - DOGS - OBSESSED - WITH -

WALKING - WHY - U - ASK - BECAUSE -

GOD - CREATED - ANIMALS - 2 - HELP -

US - PROTECT - US - GUARD & - SERVE -

US - IF - IT - WEREN'T - 4 - OUR LOVING -

GOD - NAKED - MEN - WOULD - HAVE -

BEEN - LIKE - TARZAN - WITHOUT -

CLOTHES - AND - HANGED - 2 GO -

FR - TREE - 2 - TREE - PLAYING -

WHILE - NAKED GOD SHOWED -

IMPORTANCE - OF - SOIL - NOT -

JUST - 4 - WALKING - 4 - FARMING -

BUT - THINGS - LIKE - GOLD - AND -

SILVER - DIAMONDS - SAPPHIRES -

RUBIES - LIKE - DIAMONDS - NOT -

JUST - SHINY - IT - STOPS - HEADACHES -

MIGRANE - U - WILL - NEVER - HAVE YES -

THEM AGAIN - BUT - THROUGHOUT -

TIME - NOT - ONLY - DID - PEOPLE -

KILL - THEM - 4 - JEWELRY - LESS -

AND - LESS - SEEN - ONLY - ENGLAND -

AND - INDIA - WEAR - JEWELRY I - WAS -

JUST - INSULTED - BY - ARMED - BLK -

FEMALE - SECURITY - I - CAN'T - USE -

LAWN - BEACH - BASEBALL UMBRELLA -

ALSO - 4 - RAIN - TRIPOD - AND - SCREW -

4 - IN - THERE - WITHSTANDS - 50 MPH -

WINDS - I ASKED - WHEN - IT - RAINS -

THEN - SHE - SAID - SEEK - SHELTER -

OVER - $1 BILLION - INCLUDING RISE -

APT - BLDG - EAST - HOTEL - ALL - R -

$1 BILLION - EACH - BUT - BRICKELL -

CITY - CENTRE - EIGHT - STREET FL -

METROMOVER - ALWAYS - BROKEN -

ELEVATOR - 2 - LONG - ESCALATOR -

ALWAYS - BROCKEN - SIMPLE RAIN -

OUTDOOR - MALL - ESCALATORS -

AND - ELEVATORS - BRICKELL - IT -

POUR - WATER - 2 - 2ND - FLOOR -

MAIN - 3 FLOORS - OTHER - SIDES -

4 FLOORS - THEIR - OWN - TOILETS -

WHEN - IT - RAINS - WIND - BRINGS -

2 - 2ND - FLOOR - POURS - RAIN -

BIG - TIME - SO - COMPUTERS - WET -

TABLET - SMARTPHONES - WET AND -

THEY - SAY - THEY'RE - NOT - LIABLE -

ACTUALLY - THEY - ARE - DAMAGE - 2 -

IMPORTANT - GOODS - DATE - TIME 2 -

CALL - EMERGENCY - TEL - NOS - THE -

WEATHER - MALLS - ARE - NOT - NICE -

2 - THE - POOR - AND - HUSBANDS FOR -

THEY'RE - WAITING - SO - B 4 - NO - YES -

CHAIRS - ALLOWED - NOW - THEY HAVE -

2 - PROVIDE - LARGEST - MALL - IN - FL -

AVENTURA - HAS - NO - FREE - WI FI -

THEIR - ONLY - AT - FOOD - COURT & -

QUITE - SLOW - EITHER - U - EAT - AND - BUY -

OR - LEAVE - POLICE - 4 - THEM - SINCE THE -

ILLEGALLY - ARMED - ARE - WORKING - CAN -

NOT - RELATE - 2 - SHOPPERS - SO - I'M NOT -

GOING - BACK - THERE - I - HAVE - 2 - YES -

BEFRIEND - THIS - ONE - GUY - I ALWAYS -

SEE - WITH - PUBLIX - SMALL - CART - & -

ASK - IF - HE - CAN - WATCH - MY THINGS -

AS - I - GO - 2 - PUBLIX - LA FITNESS - FOR -

MY - PACKAGES - I - USE - OUTDOOR -

9A - 9P - FREE - 5 MIN - TOILETS BUT -

WITH - BLANKET - OR - MY - COAT -

I - WAS - ABLE - 2 - USE - YELLOW -

TRASH - BAG - 2 - DO - WHAT - ME -

NEEDED - AND - IT - WORKED FOR -

WHEN - U - EAT - CERTAIN - FOODS -

POOP - WHAT - THEN - 4 - USA HAS -

NO - 24/7 - RESTROOMS - 4 - POOR -

THEY - ARE - CHARGING - THOUSANDS -

BASICALLY - 4 - BATHROOM - BUT WITH -

CONCIERGE - ALWAYS - ID - AT - ALL -

TIMES - 2 - PROVE - ADDRESS - AND -

YOU'RE - PAYING - THOUSANDS BUT -

GATED - COMMUNITY - THEY - HIRE -

TEMP - GUARDS - ALWAYS - SHOW -

ID - 4 - MILLIONS - PAID - AND NOT -

PAYING - RESIDENTIAL - PROPERTY -

TAX - U - LOOSE - PROPERTY IN THE -

FUTURE - HDG - BUYING - YOUR -

PROPERTY - 2 - DISAPPEAR THE -

BUILDINGS - BY - SATELLITE SO -

IT - DISAPPEARED - LESS - THAN -

1 SECOND - I'M - AT THE - UNDERLINE -

TYPING - 2 DAYS - AGO - IT - WAS - SO -

BAD - AT - 3RD - FLR - LAWN - I'M SO -

CONVINCED - THEY - WERE - TYRING -

2 - GET - RID - OF - ME - WELL - IT YES -

WORKED - NOT - BUYING - CHI PLACE -

ANYMORE - THE UNDERLINE - YES -

BAR - IS - FULL - BAR - SO - I - CAN -

I'M - USING - MY - LAPTOP - RIGHT -

NOW - IT's - ON - MY CALVIN KLEIN -

DUFFLE - BAG - WITH - WHEELS -

MANY - LIKE - ME - SINCE THERE -

ARE - NO - LOCKERS - 4 - LUGGAGE -

GO - 2 - MALLS - 2 - HIDE - FR HEAT -

THEIR - SECURITY - GUARD - DOES -

NOT - TELL - THEM - 2 - LEAVE - AS -

THEY - ARE - ARMED - 2 - KILL KIDS -

AND - NON-SERVICE - ANIMALS SO -

FLORIDA - WRINKLED - PRUNE - BAGS -

GOT - THEMSELVES - A - STATE 2 KILL -

KIDS - NON-SERVICE - ANIMALS -

CALIFORNIA - SOME - NEIGHBORHOODS -

3 DOGS - ONLY - PER - HOUSE - U - CAN -

KILL - THE - REST - OF - PUPPIES - NO -

ONE - WANTS - REMEMBER - THE LAW -

LAST - CENTURY - IF - U - PRODUCE A -

BABY - U - CAN - THREW - IN - TRASH -

EVEN - LIVING - ONES - BUT - ALL US -

VIOLATED - 8TH - CRUEL - AND - UNUSUAL -

PUNISHMENT - INFLICTED -

ONLY - PRESIDENT - SWEARS - 2 - PROTECT -

SERVE - AND - PRESERVE - CONSTITUTION -

BUT - THEY - FORGOT - 2 - MENTION - THE -

AMENDMENTS - BUT - BUSINESSES -

STORAGE - BUILDINGS

SHOPPING - MALLS

DON'T - OBEY - 14TH - NO - STATE -

CAN - DEPRIVE - ANY - PERSON OF -

LIBERTY - THE - RIGHT - 2 - BUY AT -

AMAZON - AND - USE - THEM THE -

RIGHT - 2 - ACT - AS - THEY PLEASE -

SO - I - WAS - HUMILIATED - AND XO -

EMBARRASSED - AT - BRICKELL MALL -

NO - LONGER - GOING - THERE - AND -

BUYING - THE - UNDERLINE - INSTEAD -

STORES - AND - PARKING - LOT - AT -

SW 7 ST - BUYING - THAT - MAKING -

OUR - MALLS - RESTRAINING - ORDERS -

EMPLOYEES - SECURITY - OF BRICKELL -

MALL - NOT - ALLOWED - EXCEPT - THE -

PEOPLE - WHO - CLEAN - THE - TRASH -

THEY - WILL - B - ALLOWED - OUR MALL -

INSTEAD - OF - ANOTHER - IKEA - NEAR -

SOLITAIR - BRICKELL - APT - BUILDING -

I'M - BUYING - 2 - MAKE - LEGAL PERMIT -

MAGIC - KINGDOM - MEDICAL CENTER -

NOT - ALLOWED - MIAMI - POLICE

ALLIED - SECURITY

SECURTY - EMPLOYEES - OF - BRICKELL -

CITY - CENTRE - EXCEPT - CLEANS TRASH -

OWNERS - OF - SHOPS - NOT - ALLOWED -

MAGIC - KINGDOM - MEDICAL - CENTER -

FREE - BABY - DELIVERY

FREE - DENTAL - AND - DENTAL SURGERY

FREE - PETS - WILD - ANIMALS - SURGERY -

PETS - SERVICE - ANIMALS - SERVICE FREE -

FREE - FOOD - THEIR - THINGS - DRINKS

FREE - SURGERY - BUILDING - NEXT 2 IT

NEAR - PUBLIX - SW 9 ST - I'M - NOT SURE -

WHAT - IT - IS - BUYING - THAT - MAKING -

SMALL - MALLS - 24/7 - APT - BUILDINGS -

IN - FRONT - OF - SW 1 AV - FACING - ONE -

WAY - BUYING - THEM - THESE - BLDGS -

DISAPPEARING - 1 SECOND - MAKING IT -

INNS - $0.25 - PER - DAY - 1 MONTH - IN -

ADVANCE - TURNING - INTO - 24/7 MALLS -

PLACES - TEENS - FAMILIES - CAN - GO 2 -

DAILY - 4 - SAFETY - FR - BAD LANDLORDS -

BAD - NEIGHBORS - BAD- POLICE - BAD -

PEOPLE - TERRIBLE - CITIES - PLACING -

NEED - 4 - MALLS - INNS - PRIORITY -

OUR - CONCEALED - CARRY - HONG KONG -

MALES - FEMALES - WE - HAVE - AUTO SO -

ELECTRONICALLY - WE - CONTROLED THE -

EMPLOYEES - SO - THEY - COULDN'T - GO -

NEAR - OUR - BUILDINGS - CAN - B - DONE -

INCLUDING - POLICE - STORAGE WORKERS -

AND - MANAGERS - THEY - WON'T - COME -

NEAR - US - AGAIN - SO - BRICKELL - 2ND -

FLOOR - NEVER - THIS - FAST - WHEN - I -

WAS - THERE - WHEN - WIND - BLEW - THE -

WATERS - STILL - THERE - WENT - 2 - THE -

2ND - FLOOR - ALWAYS - THESE - PEOPLE -

DON'T - NEED - ELECTRICITY - USING THE -

TABLES - NEXT - 2 - ELECTRICITY - WALL -

AND - SIDES - MADE - FUN - OF - FOREIGNERS -

TODAY - GERMANY - BEST - RVs - ON - EARTH -

SO - RESTRAINING - ORDERS - ON - ALL OF XO -

US - REGISTER - SO - THEY - CAN'T - COME -

NEAR - US - EVER - AGAIN - ELECTRONIC 2 -

THEY - JUST - WENT - SOMEWHERE - ELSE -

I - NEED - YOUR - PRAYERS -

FOREIGNERS - TOLD - U - CAN'T - U - CAN'T -

SO - WE'RE - TOLD - 2 - SCRAM - WE DON'T -

HAVE - THE - MONEY -

POLICE - 2 - CAPTURE - FOREIGNERS -

LOCALS - I - SAW - THAT - WEIRDO YES -

AGAIN - TRIED - 2 - TELL - HIM - 1ST -

LIME - SEAT - SW 1 AV - WHERE - I AM -

STRONGEST - MBPS - INTERNET - YES -

SPEED - HE - HAD - NO - IDEA - WHAT -

I - MEANT - LAST - TIME - HE - TOLD -

ME - MIAMI - TROLLEY - THAT's - 1 HR -

45 MIN - 2 - PLANET - FITNESS WHEN -

JUST - 20 MIN - WALKING - WE LEAVE -

STUPID - PEOPLE - HE - HAD - NO YES -

IDEA - WHAT - I - MEANT - ABOUT THE -

DIRECTION - I - GAVE - IN - ENGLISH -

SAID - IN - PARTING - HE - WANTED -

2 - HELP - GIVE - ME - A - PLACE TO -

SHOWER - HE - ALSO - SAID BEFORE -

HE - WAS - GOING - 2 B - THERE WITH -

ME - NAKED - AND - I - WAS - AGE 58 -

PERVERSE - HE - WAS - GOING 2 SAY -

2 - CUSTOMERS - OF - CASA TUA - CUCINA -

YOU'RE - HOMELESS - AND - I - WANT - TO -

HELP - I'M - ACTUALLY - NOT - I - HAVE -

LAND - IN - PHILIPPINES - BUT - I - YES -

CAN'T - REMEMBER - WHERE - HOUSE -

IS - WHO - MY - BANKS - ARE - THEY'RE -

ALL - ROBBING - ME - BUT - MY - IDEAS -

MY - 2 - SMALL - MAKATI - GROCERIES -

DON'T - KNOW - WHERE - THEY - ARE -

SO - I'M - JUST - PRAYING - TOKYO -

MALE - SCIENTISTS - FIND - ME - 2 -

START - HDG - BANKS - AND - SO I -

DON'T - NEED - MY - MONEY - THERE -

I - DON'T - NEED - MANILA - ADDRESS -

I - DON'T - NEED - MAKATI - GROCERY -

PRAY - 4 - ME - MY - TOKYO - SCIENTISTS -

FIND - ME - BECAUSE - TOKYO - HAS - YES -

TERRIBLE - EARTHQUAKES - PHILIPPINES -

EARTHQUAKES - NOT - PLEASANT - LIKE -

WE'RE - DANCING - SO - SCIENTISTS HAVE -

2 - FIND - ANOTHER - PLACE - I - CAN HELP -

THEM - WITH - THAT - PASSPORTS - AS - MY -

GIFT - 2 - THEM - LANDS - MY - GIFT - SO -

PRAY - THEY - FIND - ME - WE'RE - ALL XO -

FREE - FR - ARMED - BULLIES - THANKS 2 -

THEM - FOREVER - NOT - ONE - WILL - BE -

ABLE - 2 - HARM - US - EVERY - AGAIN -

PRAY - PRAY - JESUS - IS - LORD - YES

#Youtube

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jooheun · 7 years ago

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i love one (1) man

#JOOHEON #MONSTA X #not to sound straight but #i am not fucking kidding u guys when i say i have Complete tunnel vision for him #oh my god ?#i'm literally gonna lose my mind KFNDJSJSJDNDB #HIS LITTLE SMILE INT HE LAST ONE I HAD TO KEEP REPAUSING IT BC I KEPT MISSING IT #BECAUSE HE DIDNT SMILE FKR LONG ENOUGH #AND LET ME JUST TEL L YOU . I LOVE THIS MAN #EVERYONE: ELLEN SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT JOOHEON !!! WE GET IT !!! HES THE LOVE OF UR LIFE !!!!#IM MAKINGSO MANY JH LOVE POSTS BUT IDC THATS THE LOML!!!!!!#I NEED TO GO TO BED IM GONNA DIE #TXT #AND ANOTHER THING #ALL THE FLASHES OF HIS TUMMY!!! IM GONNA FUCKINNG DIE I LITERALLY LOVE HIM #MOM . I LOVE A MAN #love post #mx

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babysizedfics · 4 years ago

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content warning: discussing fandom discourse about virgils characterisation

listen i rlly do get why ppl dont like uwu baby fanon virgil but im begging people to stop talking abt it as if it's immoral and wrong to interpret the character that way, because it kills me a little every time and i know for a fact it hurts others too

we are all just broken little things in this honest to gosh wasteland of a world trying to find a morsel of happiness to keep us going, and if that's interpreting a fictional character in a way that brings us comfort then so be it

it is not wrong, it is not somehow offensive - this is a fictional character we're talking about remember

guys, having personal preferences as wel as stating them is okay of COURSE it is - you can hate uwu baby virgil to your hearts content idc you can be open about it if u so wish too - but my problem is when people believe they somehow have the moral highground for hating it and act as if the people who DO find comfort in it are commiting a cardinal sin

this interpretation literally hurts nobody

"virgil canonically doesn't like being babied" -> okay, this is headcanon though, we know where to draw the line.

"you're disrespecting his boundaries" -> HE'S NOT REAL you cannot upset a fictional character because they are not in this plane of existence

"anxiety isn't like that" -> lemme tel you something. my anxiety IS like that. my anxiety makes me cry and tremble when i meet new people and it makes me sensitive and it makes me stutter and it makes me blush and it makes me typically uwu baby. you don't have a monopoly over ALL anxiety, you understand your own and no one elses. don't make generalised assumptions please

and that's why it bothers me. i project onto virgil i basically make him ME and its all because i need comfort in the form of fictional worlds and that's okay. but then people talk about how that specific interpretation is UNREALISTIC and OFFENSIVE and DUMB and it hurts because that is someone's comfort and someone's projection that you're calling those mean words. it is not just me who does this i know that basically everyone in fandom projects onto their fav characters so before you tear down someones interpretation, consider you might be unknowingly attacking THEIR personality

basically: not everything is a sociopolitical statement. if someone wants to draw virgil blushing it doesnt mean they think anxiety makes you weak. if someone writes about virgil sobbing and being comforted by his friends that doesnt mean they think he is purely innocent in canon.

let people project onto characters and if you don't like it then DON'T INTERACT it's that simple!

#im sorry i got so worked up but this is so importsnt im TIRED of people thinking they are morally superior for having an interpretation -#- that differs from something they disagree with #YOU CAN HAVE AN OPINION AND PREFERENCES #but dont fricking tear down everyone elses on the way #let people find joy for goodness sake #it hurts NOBODY #bee babbles #sanders sides #discourse

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pacifymebby · 2 years ago

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You answered a anon afew days ago about what makes someone a good or bad kisser but girllll

some of these men out here are HORRENDOUS 😭 as like a person who feels validated when someone gives me attention, I kiss a lot of strangers. like some people call angus thongs a comedy but that slimy little fourteen year old kisses better then most adult men in the world. like why so wet? why so aggressive? why do you insist on licking my face ? i’ve met like one decent kisser in my life and she was a woman. please tel me there’s hope out there 😭

Yeah omg okay it's been awhile since I had a truly bad kiss but for sure to me everything u just said sounds gross and icky.

I swear some guys though just see how people kiss in porn and think that's what we want and like no. No.

Saliva boy in Angus thongs and perfect snogging is a real problem. A plague against the good kissers of the world.

For sure though I think there's hope for you bestie. There is probably a part of like, when you're kissing random people all the time and you're not building up any familiarity that might be part of it? My experience of one night stands and random snogs as a younger adult was that like, well, I never had a good one where I genuinely thought it was the hottest experience ever.

They were always aggressive because they were usually trying to escalate to a shag as quick as possible. Also when ur out at clubs and bars these guys are drunk and probably think they kiss way hotter than they do or whatever. They aren't giving u their best that's for sure.

But also, I feel like I used to feel like that too, where when people give you confirmation you're attractive by kissing you or showering you in attention, you feel validated and stuff.

And like I'm not telling you to stop kissing random men right, have all the fun you like, as long as you're having fun and enjoying the kisses. Like if someone's a bad kisser pill away and walk away bc u wanna enjoy the kiss and not just be a washboard for their tongue.

Like, part of the reason the kisses feel shit is because their isn't any kind of feeling in them, I don't mean only kiss someone you have romantic feelings for because I know that's not everyone's thing, but, there needs to be some form of chemistry there beyond you wanting validation if that makes sense?

Like if the feeling between you and a guy isn't 100% you would drop ur pants for him there and then because he's hot and turning you on, then do not kiss him.

It's something I've been forced to consider recently because there's ways me and B kiss (like with full tongues and a bit aggressive sometimes) (or like he puts his hand on my neck when we kiss) that I have genuinely found have made me feel sick when other people have done it.

I think that's what I mean when I say it's subjective, if you don't find the person gives you that physical turned on feeling just when you're talking/looking at one another, then chances are, when they kiss you your initial instinct will be "ew"

I have an ex that I was pals with prior to going out with them, but like when we started getting stronger feelings there was always this bit in my head like oh but am I actually physically attracted to him because I'm not sure, and sure enough the first time he kissed me, I was thrilled to bits that he WANTED to kiss me BUT, the kiss made me flinch and I had to force myself to like it?

Like that relationship lasted until that ex started being a cunt, I forced myself for a long time, but he really wasn't a good kisser and I used to find myself grossed out every time he pulled away from me. And I think it's cause the chemistry of actually finding him hot and wanting him to ruin me wasn't there and never was?

And when you're kissing random men and a lot of its to do with wanting affection and validation, you'll drop your own standards of who is attractive enough to you to kiss. Whereas the key to a really good snog is havin that intense physical attraction to someone? Like think about it like this right, clinically speaking you're rubbing your open mouth and all your spit into someone else's and you're letting someone else, a stranger, put their tongue and spit in your mouth and like, actually even though its just a kiss that's some intimate shit? Like you NEED to be genuinely physically attracted to someone and not attracted to the validation their affection can give you?

Like I get affection making you feel validated and stuff because bestie, boy have I still got that issue!! I still feel like I need random strangers to want to hit on me or check me out in order to feel validated, even though I have B and I know I'm loved and that he finds me attractive. I think as women were taught to seek out men's affection as validation bc the patriarchy. But you can get that validation AND reject bad kissers or guys you don't find attractive!!!! They still fancy you, and you know they would kiss you, but you don't want to kiss them because actually you're only kissing guys that aren't going to disappoint you?

I hope all that made sense and didn't come off as harsh at all, becayse I totally get what you mean, but for sure there is 100% hope xxx

❤️

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themetaphorgirl · 4 years ago

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I asked for cute and cuddly things so I could write something adorable!! I tried to combine as many as possible!

@therestisconfettis : “the psolc babies making a pillow fort!!”

@birds-are-better-than-you : “My brain immediately goes to people actually listening to him talk instead of cutting him off, but thats just rooted in sadness”

@fragolinaa : “I just want people cuddling him, maybe someone who hasn't yet like Emily or Dave?”

@purpleturtle31extra : “Spending an off day exploring music together! Like showing him songs that remind you of him or a certain memory..”

anonymous: “cute cuddly idea: u mentioned Emily and Dave getting Spencer legos. Write a little thing of a rainy day or whatever and everyone’s just chilling building random shit with legos and then there’s gonna be Spencer actually building something with proper ratios and actual potential urban planning and everyone else is just like “hmm... I have built something vaguely resembling a plane”

anonymous: “omg cuddly mom alex?? maybe spencer napping with her and he has a nightmare??”

I hope I touched on everything!! I think I captured at least a little bit of everything!!!

----------

“Hey,” Emily said. “Are you feeling okay?”

Spencer dragged his fork around his plate, his chin resting heavily in his hand. “I’m not hungry,” he said dully.

“This is your last day to eat whatever you want,” she pointed out. “Go get something sugary. Donuts or something.”

He shrugged, and she bit back a sigh. Everyone else had left on Wednesday afternoon to spend Thanksgiving break with their respective families- literally everyone, even Hotch- and while they’d had a nice Thanksgiving at James’s house, and she was enjoying having her room all to herself, she and Spencer had been left behind, and the kid was moping like it was his job. She was starting to figure out that while he liked doing things on his own, he needed the security of knowing that everyone else was nearby.

“I guess I’ll go get some chocolate milk or something,” Spencer sighed, sliding down from his chair.

“See? There you go,” she said. “Treat yourself.”

As soon as he slid down from his chair and trudged away she pulled out her phone.

the cause of hotchner’s headaches

9:09am

You guys need to help w the kid hes so sad i dont know what to do

James texted back first, which didn’t surprise her.

doctor james, medicine man

9:10am

Is he okay?

the cause of hotchner’s headaches

9:10am

HES SAD I CANT HANDLE IT COME HELP ME

spaghetti grandpa

9:11am

He’ll be fine. He knows everybodys coming back today right?

the cause of hotchner’s headaches

9:12am

HE IS SAD NOW COME OVER

She set her phone aside as Spencer walked back up to the table with a carton of chocolate milk in his hands. “Can you open this for me, please?” he asked.

She did and handed it back, but he didn’t drink it. “How about we go watch a movie or something?” she suggested. “While we’re waiting for everybody to get back on campus. That’ll be fun, right?”

He shrugged. “I guess,” he said. “What time is it?”

“A little after nine.”

He scrunched up his face, calculating. “Who do you think will be back first?” he asked.

“I don’t know, babe, we’ll have to see,” she said. “Drink your milk and we’ll get out of here.”

He sighed. “I don’t think I want it anymore,” he said. She shot him her best impression of Alex’s mom look. He rolled his eyes, but he drank it anyway.

Outside the dining hall it was cold and gray and dreary, rain falling just steadily enough to be irritating. She pulled the hood of her jacket over her head and made Spencer put his purple galaxy-print raincoat on over his his sweater before they walked down the steps.

“Do you think the weather will ground planes?” he asked anxiously.

“Your guess is as good as mine, squirt,” she said. “It’ll definitely rain all day, but I don’t know if it’ll affect planes. You’ll probably know better than me.”

He said nothing, but he slipped his small hand into hers. She squeezed back gently. The kid had been perfectly well-behaved the whole time she’d been left to watch him, but it was frustrating to see him so sad and quiet and droopy. She didn’t think it was possible to be homesick for other people, but Spencer definitely had a bad case of it.

They settled in the common room, but the cozy space seemed cavernous and empty without the rest of the group. Spencer left his coat and his shoes in his room and settled into Alex’s usual spot on the couch, leaning on the armrest.

“So what do you want to do, kiddo?” she said. He raised and lowered one shoulder. She huffed. “I’ll just pick something then.”

“Nothing scary, please,” he said, his chin resting on his folded arms.

“No, don’t worry, I learned my lesson,” she said. She grabbed a Star Wars off the shelf- she wasn’t sure which one it was, but she figured she couldn’t go wrong with something sci fi.

“Hotch’s plane lands at eleven, right?” he said as she plunked down on the opposite end of the couch.

“I think so,” she said. She reached over and ruffled his hair lightly. “Stop overthinking, you’re going to blow a fuse in there. Everyone will be home soon, don’t worry about it.”

“I’m not worried,” he mumbled.

They got about halfway through Star Wars (she still wasn’t entirely sure which one it was) when they heard Dave and James on the stairs. “Hey, guys!” Dave called. “We’ve got presents!”

Emily paused the movie. “What do you mean, presents?” she said. “What’d you bring me?”

James and Dave each held large plastic tubs that they dropped with heavy clatters on the floor. “Spencer, you’ve been having fun with the legos we got you for your birthday, right?” James said.

Spencer raised his head. “Yeah,” he said slowly.

“Well, we decided to dig around for our old lego collections you can have your own giant collection,” Dave said.

He slid off the couch. “Really?” he said.

“Yeah, absolutely,” James said. “Go get yours, we’ll put them all together.”

Spencer’s eyes lit up. “Okay!” he said, darting off to his room.

“Oh my god, thank goodness you two are here,” Emily said.

“You know, you said he was sad, and I didn’t believe it till I saw him,” Dave said, wrenching the lid off the first bin. “He looks like a deflated balloon.”

“See? I wasn’t lying,” Emily said. “Poor kid has been moping all week.”

James checked his phone. “Hopefully everybody will get in without any problems,” he said. “Alex texted me a little bit ago and said they delayed her flight by an hour.”

“Oh, yikes,” Emily said. “She’d better get back here soon. And don’t tell the kid that, he’ll worry more.”

Spencer ran back into the room with his legos. “How should I organize them?” he asked. “Color first or size first?”

“How about we, you know, build something?” Dave suggested as he sat down on the couch. “C’mere, passerotto, I think I have all the pieces to the batcave.”

“Ooh, which version?” James asked as Spencer sat down on the floor in front of Dave.

“I don’t know. I think I built it once when I was Spencer’s age and then never touched it again.”

Emily leaned over James and scooped up a handful of plastic pieces. “What are you going to build?” she asked.

“Hey, don’t copy me!”

They worked on their projects mostly in companionable silence, sometimes absent chatter. Rain continued to tap at the windows. At least Spencer seemed distracted at last, focused on his projects.

Lightning cracked, white light shining through the window for a brief moment, and everyone jumped; Spencer knocked over one of his structures. “Holy shit,” Emily said. “That was terrifying.”

“You okay?” Dave asked, touching Spencer’s arm lightly.

He nodded, leaning against Dave until he lifted him onto his lap. “Do you think everybody’s okay?” he asked. “Planes can’t always fly in this sort of weather.”

“I’m sure everybody’s fine,” Dave reassured him. Spencer bit his lip, still staring out the window. “So what have you been building?”

“Scale model of campus,” he said. “Well, it’s not exactly to scale. But it’s pretty close.”

James held up a lump of legos. “This was supposed to be a plane,” he said. “But it doesn’t look particularly aerodynamic.”

Spencer laughed. “What kind of plane is it supposed to be?” he asked. “It looks like an off-kilter Cessna.”

“I don’t know. Just...a plane,” James said.

“I’m trying to see how tall I can build this thing without it falling over,” Emily said. “Not much success yet.”

“I’m sure you know, caro,” Dave said, poking Spencer lightly in the side. “How tall is the tallest lego structure ever?”

“The tallest one is in Milan, it’s a hundred and fourteen feet, eleven inches tall,” he said. “The previous tallest was just a hundred and fourteen feet tall, in Budapest.”

“Milan, hm?” Dave said. “Maybe I’ll go see it next time I’m over there.”

“There’s one in Tel Aviv that was built to be four feet taller but-”

Lightning cracked again and Spencer jumped. Dave rubbed his back lightly. “It’s okay, it’s just a bad storm,” he said. It was too late, though- the attempts at distraction had failed, and Spencer was clearly back to worrying, the corners of his mouth tugging down.

Dave looked over at Emily. What should we do? he mouthed. She shrugged helplessly.

Thankfully, right at that moment heavy footsteps echoed on the stairs. Spencer raised his head. Please let it be one of our group, please let it be one of our group, Emily thought fervently.

A tall figure in a rain-soaked coat made it to the top of the stairs, almost terrifying for a split second, but he threw back his hood and shook his head. “Jesus, that was a nightmare,” he said.

Spencer scrambled to his feet and ran towards him, nearly kicking Dave in his haste. “Hotch!” he shrieked, throwing his arms around his waist.

“Hey, kiddo!” Hotch said, bending to hug him. “Hey, careful, it’s raining really hard out there, I’m drenched and I don’t want you to get wet.”

“How was your flight?” James asked.

Spencer, undeterred, still clung to Hotch; Hotch ran his fingers through his thick short curls. “Unbelievably shitty,” he said. “Flights were getting canceled left and right, it’s just storming bad everywhere. If I hadn’t gotten such an early flight, I might not’ve made it back.”

“That’s what we’ve been worrying about,” Emily said. “And when I say we I mean Spencer.”

Hotch tugged him back so he could see his face. “Hey, stop worrying,” he said. “Everybody will get back eventually. I promise.”

“I can’t help worrying,” Spencer said. “What if everybody’s flights get delayed? What if something happens to their planes. What if-”

Hotch scooped him up. “Hey, I think the dining hall’s open for lunch,” he said. “Anybody else hungry? I didn’t have time for breakfast before my flight and all they gave me was one packet of pretzels.”

“They stopped giving away peanuts because of allergies becoming more common,” Spencer said, leaning his cheek against Hotch’s shoulder even though his coat was soaked with rain.

“Yeah?” Hotch said. “How about you go get your coat and your shoes, okay? I’m starving.”

“Okay,” Spencer said reluctantly. Hotch set him back down on his feet and he ran down the hall to his room.

“I am so glad you’re back, Hotchner,” Emily said, sweeping her lego tower back into the bin. “He’s been so sad with everybody gone.”

“I can tell,” he said. “Has he been like this the whole time?”

“Oh, yeah,” Emily said. “I’ve barely been able to get two words out of him.”

“Even when they came over for Thanksgiving he wasn’t talking much,” James added.

Hotch sighed. “I didn’t even think about this,” he said. “Poor kid.”

Emily’s phone buzzed. “Oh, it’s Penelope,” she said. “I’ll put her on speaker. Hey, Pen, how’s it going?”

“Terrible!” Penelope said, her voice crackling over the line. “I made the flight from California to Texas for my layover, but they canceled my connecting flight. It’s storming too bad.”

“Oh, yikes,” Dave said. “Are you going to be okay?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” she sighed. “They have me booked for a flight first thing in the morning, and the airline is putting me up in a hotel for the night, but it’s so frustrating.”

“I’m sure,” James said. “Stay safe, okay? Do you need anything?”

“Are you kidding? The hotel has like a million channels and room service, I’m doing great!” Penelope said. “I’ll call you guys in the morning before my flight, okay? Talk to you soon!”

Emily sighed as the call ended. “Well, that’s one down,” she said.

“Penelope’s not coming?”

Spencer peeked out of the hall, his rainboots on and his coat dragging from his hand. “Yeah, her connecting flight got canceled,” Dave said. “But she’s safe, and she’ll be on a flight tomorrow, okay? So don’t worry.”

Judging by the way he pressed his mouth together, he definitely was worried. Emily pushed herself up from the floor. “Let’s go get lunch, okay?” she said. “Before Hotch starves.”

The rain had gotten decidedly worse, coming down in heavy sheets and flooding patches of the courtyard. Her umbrella helped a little but not much; Dave complained loudly the entire walk over. Spencer stayed glued to Hotch’s side, clinging tightly to his hand even once they made it to the warm safety of the dining hall.

Hotch pulled Spencer’s hood down as they got in line. “What do you want?” he asked.

“I’m not hungry,” he said.

He frowned, then covered Spencer’s ears. “Emily, be honest,” he said. “Did he eat while we were gone?”

“Not for lack of trying,” she said. “I kept putting shit on his plate and he barely touched it.”

“Did he just eat ice cream and candy?”

“He didn’t even want sweets. Or coffee, even.”

Hotch’s frown deepened. “Well, shit,” he said. He dropped his hands to Spencer’s shoulders. “Okay, kid, you have to eat something. If you don’t pick, I’ll pick for you.”

Spencer shrugged. “That’s fine,” he said.

Hotch met Emily’s gaze, eyebrows raised. “I told you,” she said.

She followed Hotch down the cafeteria line as he filled up two plates. Spencer stayed so close he ran the risk of getting stepped on, his small hand clinging to the hem of Hotch’s jacket.

Dave and James had beaten them to their usual table, and neither of them looked particularly happy. “Bad news,” James said. “JJ just called. Her parents rescheduled her flight. They were worried about the storms, so she’ll be here tomorrow afternoon.”

Emily glanced over at Spencer. “But she’s okay?” he said anxiously.

“She’s fine, caro,” Dave said. “And she’ll be here tomorrow.”

“What about Derek and Alex?” he asked. “Have they called? Or texted.”

“Not yet,” James said. “Maybe they’re already on their flights, though. I”m sure we’ll hear from them soon.”

Hotch set the tray down on the table, then picked Spencer up and set him down in his chair. “They’ll be fine,” he said. “So how did Thanksgiving go for you guys?”

Even with their attempts at changing the subject and trying to draw him into the conversation, Spencer seemed to sink further into himself, his legs tucked up under him and his chin resting in his hand, his plate still mostly untouched. Emily couldn’t blame him for being sad. All week it had been just the two of them in the nearly-deserted dining hall, and even with the boys there it seemed wrong without the rest of the group- Penelope shrieking about something that didn’t need to be shrieked about, Derek regaling them with stories from football practice, JJ’s pretty laugh bubbling over, Alex keeping the peace and stopping cups and plates from getting knocked over and tilted onto the ground.

Hotch didn’t make much headway getting Spencer to eat, but at least he ate a little bit, and their little group braved the storm to get back to Lincoln House. “What have you guys been up to?” he asked as they settled in the common room again, coats and umbrellas hung up to dry.

“Legos,” James said. “This was supposed to be a plane.”

Hotch laughed. “Yikes,” he said. “I’m glad you’re not planning on going into engineering.”

“Yeah, probably for the best,” he said ruefully. “I-”

“Hold on, hold on,” Dave interrupted. “Did you guys see the group chat?”

Emily fumbled for her phone. “No, I didn’t, I...oh.”

“What’s wrong?” Hotch asked.

“Derek’s flight got canceled too,” James said. “He says it got delayed and he sat on the tarmac for three hours, but they pulled everybody off the plane. His mom’s already picked him up, so he’s fine.”

Emily glanced over at Spencer. He curled himself up smaller, his knees tucked up to his chest, chewing on his thumbnail. “But he’ll be here tomorrow?” he said.

“Yeah, he’ll be here tomorrow,” Dave reassured him.

Spencer lifted his head. “Can we call Alex?” he asked quietly.

“Yeah, of course,” Emily said, immediately pulling Alex’s contact info on the screen. “Here, kiddo. Just press-”

Lightning cracked, and with a sharp pop the common room went dark.

“Holy shit!” Emily shrieked, the phone falling from her hand.

“Did a fuse blow?” Dave said.

James got up and looked out the window. “Well, judging by the other buildings on campus...I think the power’s out everywhere,” he said.

“Well, fuck,” Hotch said.

Emily raised an eyebrow. “Watch your language!” she said in mock horror.

“Oh, shut up,” Hotch said good-naturedly. “Well, I guess we’ll just have to wait for the power to come back on. Spencer, do you want to go ahead and call Alex? She’ll probably be glad to miss the power outage.”

“I think the tower’s down too,” Spencer said in a small voice. “There’s no signal.” He held the phone back out to Emily. “Thanks anyway.”

She reached for the phone, and as the lock screen flickered she caught the faint mark of tears on his cheek. “Oh, no,” she said. “Oh, fuck. Spencer, don’t cry.”

“I’m not crying,” he said, but there was a distinct wobble in his voice.

“Spencer, it’s going to be okay,” Hotch said. “The power’s going to come back on, and everyone will be home soon.”

It was too dark to see, but she could hear Spencer sniffling in a valiant effort to keep form crying. “I know,” he said. “But I-”

Hotch picked Spencer up and placed him in Emily’s lap. “Stay here with Em for a second,” he said. “James, Dave, come with me.”

Spencer dropped his head against Emily’s collarbone as she wrapped her arms around him. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled.

“Don’t be sorry,” she said. “It’s been a rough week, dude. You didn’t get to go home and see your family, and you miss everybody. And you’re worried because of the storms. It makes sense.” She kissed the top of his head. “And now we’ve got all this power outage shit. But it’ll be okay.”

Hotch dumped an armload of stuff onto the nearest armchair. “Thank goodness for Penelope’s illegal candle stash,” he said.

Emily twined one of Spencer’s short curls around her finger. “What’s with all of the pillows and blankets?” she asked.

In the dim light she could see Hotch grin. “We’re going to make a blanket fort,” he said. “C’mere, Spencer, I could use your brain for this.”

Emily set Spencer on his feet as James and Dave brought in their collections of pillows and blankets. She busied herself lighting candles and placing them in safe places around the room as Spencer directed the older boys in their construction. He seemed to perk up a little bit with something to focus on, especially as they let him be in charge.

“Okay, I’ve made some blanket forts in my day, but this one is pretty cool,” James said.

“That’s because Penelope has about eight million blankets and they’re all soft as baby puppies,” Emily said as she crawled into the fort. “I claim the blue pillow!”

All five of them fit comfortably inside, the interior lit with a string of battery operated fairy lights, also taken from Penelope’s room. Spencer nestled himself between Hotch and Emily. “Are we going to tell Penelope that we borrowed all of her stuff?” he asked.

Hotch handed him his favorite blanket. “I think if we leave the fort up till she gets back, she won’t mind as long as she gets to hang out in here,” he said.

“What should we do?” Dave asked. “Power’s still out, and there’s no wifi either.”

“Oh!” Emily said. “Okay, I’ve been trying to get you to listen to this album for weeks. Now is the perfect time! You’re a captive audience.”

They took turns passing each other’s phones back and forth, listening to different songs in the comfort of the handmade blanket fort, playfully arguing over each other’s tastes in music as the warm glow of the fairy lights cast soft shadows. Spencer seemed a little less tense now, snuggled safely between Hotch and Emily with his blanket hugged to his chest.

She hadn’t kept track of time, but it was at least two hours before the power switched back on, the overhead lights suddenly way too bright after the dimmness of the tent. “There we go,” Dave said, sitting up and checking his phone. “And we’ve got signal again!” He stretched his arm over James and Emily to hold out the phone to Spencer. “Here, passerotto, see if you can call Alex.”

He took it eagerly and tapped at the screen to bring up her info, but his excitement faded almost instantly. “It went right to voicemail,” he said. “Thanks anyway.”

James scrambled ungracefully to his feet. “Hey, since the power’s back, who wants to watch a movie?” he said.

“Not a Star War, please,” Emily called. “I can’t tell any of them apart.”

Hotch propped himself up on his elbow. “Hey, Spence,” he said. “It’s okay. I’m sure Alex is fine.”

“Yeah,” Spencer said. He turned to Hotch, one corner of his mouth tugging up in a rueful little half smile. “I bet her flight got canceled too. It’s okay.”

James flipped the overhead lights off, leaving them back in the glow of the candles and the string lights, and crawled back into the fort with the remote in his hand. “All right, if anyone has objections, y’all can get up yourself and change it,” he said.

Emily settled back as the movie started. Spencer was quiet beside her, but after a while he rolled over onto his stomach, his forehead pressed against Hotch’s arm and his blanket tangled around his legs, and she smiled when she heard his first little snore.

“Hotchner,” she whispered. “This blanket fort idea was genius.”

Hotch grinned. “Sean made me make one for him while I was home,” he said. “I figured Spencer might like it too.” He paused. “Is he asleep?” Emily nodded. “Thank god.”

James sat up and pushed his hair out of his eyes. “Guys, I still haven’t heard from Alex,” he said. “It’s still going right to voicemail when I call her and she hasn’t answered any texts.”

“Maybe her signal’s out too,” Dave said. “Don’t worry about it. Alex can take care of herself.”

James pouted. “Yeah, but...I might be a little worried about her,” he said. “It’s not like her to not answer.”

“Awww, you miss your girlfriend,” Emily teased.

“I do! I do miss her!” James said.

“Guys, if any of you wake up Spencer, I will murder you,” Hotch hissed.

“I’m sorry!” James whispered back. “I just- I think I need to be worried about Alex.”

Suddenly a familiar person knelt down and leaned into the tent. “You’re worried about me?” Alex said, her long red hair hanging loose around her shoulders. “That’s so sweet!”

James scrambled up, smacking Dave in the face in his haste. “Oh my god, I missed you!” he said. He tugged her closer, cupping her face in his hands, and kissed her deeply. “Oh my god. Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she laughed, running her fingers through his hair. “My phone died and I didn’t pack any of my portable chargers in my carryon. Where’s everybody else?”

“Everybody’s flights are delayed,” Emily said. “Spencer’s been beside himself.”

“Oh, poor thing,” she said. “Is he sleeping? I don’t want to wake him up.”

“Yeah, he just dozed off,” Hotch said. “He’s going to be so relieved to see you.”

Emily scooted over to make room. “C’mere, the movie hasn’t been on for very long,” she said.

“Hey!” James protested. “She’s my girlfriend, shouldn’t she be next to me?”

“Well, she’s my roommate, and I’ve had her for longer,” Emily said. Alex laughed as she settled between her and Spencer, busying herself with snuggling him against her side and tucking him in. Emily leaned over to whisper in James’s ear. “Besides, we all know you two are gonna go fool around the second you get a chance. You’ll get your quality time, don’t worry.”

Even in the dim light she could see him turn red. “What are you guys whispering about?” Alex asked.

“Nothing!” James squeaked. Emily made a rude hand gesture and he smacked her arm. “Emily! Stop it!”

She snickered as she leaned her head against Alex’s shoulder. “How was your week being in charge?” Alex asked as she adjusted Spencer’s blanket around him.

“Could have been worse...could have been a lot better,” Emily said. “He was so sad. I’m not good with sad kids.”

“I’m sure you did great,” Alex reassured her.

The movie was almost over when Spencer began to shift and whimper in his sleep. “Is he okay?” Emily asked.

“He’s-” Hotch winced as Spencer kicked him in the shins. “Ow. Bad dream, I think.”

Alex sat up. “Okay, I’m going to wake him up,” she said.

“Careful, he can be pretty feisty,” Hotch warned.

Alex stroked his hair back from his forehead as he tried to pull away from her. “Spencer, wake up,” she called gently, her hand resting on his chest. “Come on, darling.”

She kept coaxing him until his eyes finally opened. “What’s going on?” he mumbled.

“You had a bad dream,” she said.

He blinked. “Alex?” he said sleepily. “Did your plane land safely?”

Hotch laughed. “Yeah, kiddo, her plane landed safely,” he said. “Get the sleep out of your eyes.”

Spencer rubbed his face and blinked again. “Alex!” he yelped, throwing himself into her arms.

“Hi, baby,” she said. “Did you miss me?”

“A little bit,” he said, tilting his face so she could kiss his cheek. “Was your flight okay? Was there a lot of turbulence?”

“Everything was fine,” she reassured him as she cuddled him against her side. “Now, sh, I think Dave is getting invested in the movie.”

“No, I’m not,” he said absently.

“Yes, he is,” Emily teased.

Spencer settled down with his head on Alex’s knees; Hotch tugged his blanket around him. “Everybody else will be here tomorrow,” he said. “Penelope’s connecting flight got canceled, and Derek’s got canceled, and JJ’s parents rescheduled her.”

“That’s good,” she said, stroking her fingers through his hair. “Go back to sleep, darling. You look so tired. And everything’s going to be okay, nothing to worry about.”

The rain had settled back into a light tapping on the window; the thunder and lightning had long since stopped. Emily leaned back against her pillows, smiling in contented relief. Alex was right. Everything was going to be okay.

#au: patron saint of lost causes #caitlin writes things #emily prentiss #alex blake #alex miller #aaron hotchner #hotch #dave rossi #james blake #spencer reid

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wdymwhatdoyoumnea · 3 years ago

Text

I posted 14,453 times in 2021

1365 posts created (9%)

13088 posts reblogged (91%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 9.6 posts.

I added 1,091 tags in 2021

#ask to tag - 297 posts

#chi my beloved - 222 posts

#cat cat cat cat cat ca - 135 posts

#adorable - 103 posts

#tiny my beloved - 87 posts

#kitty!!!!; - 69 posts

#wwwww chi my beloved this is so cute - 62 posts

#amazing - 48 posts

#skeleton rattles out an awnser - 36 posts

#skeleton and rat: halloween spooks - 32 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#currently failing one class and like very very closs to failing this ither classes and as soon as the deadline hits fir my other class ifai

My Top Posts in 2021

Give me your opinion on all the HypMic characters

(also if you don't remember what some are like just tell me and I'll tell you because I know how horrible your memory is ☆)

ifbajdbakfbskd anitxh they dont know i have a bad memory you just exposed meeeee

okay speed run fucking gO:

BB!!!:

uhhhhhh ichicro; dude fix your sibling realshinships yall nit really functiong as a healthy family i think, but also trust them more, they can handle it

jrio; dude buddy man you have to be a litttle tiny bit nicer i think but other then that rock on youre rad

saburo; i love him but also work on being a little nicer you do need to start working on communication i feel like but again that kinda just what happens in that family, but that dosnet mean you can imrpove

uhhhhhhhhhh cool color guys????? the bule?????? hhhhhhhhh whats thier nAMe??????????:

samatoki: sir you need therapy. also lay of the smoking sir i dont the sister you no longer talk to likes it alot.lol. also i do like your asthwinc ily but work on your anger and please.dont yell around kids youll scare them sir

jyuto; not to be rude but what the fuck. why??????? if you wanna be a a good c*p do it the right way??????????????? ??? i mean like what???

rio: rock on dude but please stop cooking so many nice and cute animals im so mad at you for that, also did you have youre pericings ehile on tour?????

FLING POSSE flingposseflingpos:

hhhhhhhh dice; i mean first off mood and vibe but also set up a fucking savings fund. please.please. also whats going on with any lack of passion for mosly laegal activitives????? gamblies have no honuer even tho honhr among theifs thing?????? sir please. a braincell. use one. get one and use it

gentaro; skndskbdakdb amazing incredible show stopping breath taking never been seen before i dont care what you say the way he talks and dresses is just him being him and habing fun living his life and not hurting anyone doing it, and he's able to enjoy himself around people who let him be him and express himself he has good taste

ramuda ramuda ramude: he's more complex (duh) but he's till able to care about the people around him in his own way and supports them and enjoys himself do he needs to work on being more to himslef but give the whole clone thing it makes sense but also should also be more to himself beacuse of the whole cone thing

MAT MAT MAT MAT MAT MAT AMT::;

hifumi: . i dont want to be mean but,,; u gotta work on talking to people with out the jackt buddy. or work on more boundeirs in the jacket atleast!! but iverall he's suppoerive and a good guy he's desveres what he has and the nice and also suppoetive people in his life

doppo: buddy. threapy helps ive heard. anyway you need to really just get the meantal health unser co troll. u have good people around you to help so i thi k you can also illy

jakurai; . express yourswlf more sir. trust your team mates a little more, you can be yourself with them. also good charcter and im glad u have your realxing hobbys and a good head on your shoulders

do i do dh and hhhhh BAT????

35 notes • Posted 2021-02-19 09:30:49 GMT

click on this if were firnds its a gift <3

35 notes • Posted 2021-05-18 21:54:27 GMT

neither if us have the fucking braincell

@thou-shalt-not-staple-rats dweeb

38 notes • Posted 2021-09-16 21:42:38 GMT

good mo5 everyone, nobody fucking tell danny but im love keaya now???? sm???????

46 notes • Posted 2021-08-07 06:04:41 GMT

im not saying that all my friends are amazing and that i care them, but i AM saying that exactly, actually

72 notes • Posted 2021-05-30 02:56:35 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

jd fucking look the post where i make fun if you is a top post

#your tumblr year in review

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jokerfan99 · 4 years ago

Photo

Icebreaking (RWBY/RVB) by Necroceph

*RVB Opening Theme*

Grif: Ugh... Simmons: Grif. Grif? GRIF! Grif: Wha- Mom? Simmons: Nope it's your old pal, Simmons. Grif: Oh man, I had the weirdest dream. There was this blonde chick who emerged from this crashed ship. She was hot as hell, you could've seen her! But then all the sudden she started sabotaging everything just to cover her tracks because she claimed that Command kidnapped her because they chose her to be a new host for O'Malley. Yang: Who's O'Malley?

That was no dream!

Grif: O-oh fuck... me.

He faints again.

Ruby: Not again! That's the third time he fainted. Next one might end up a coma. Sarge: Dagnabbit. Lopez, get a bucket of hydrofluoric acid. Water won't work this time. Lopez: Sí señor. Ruby: Wait won't that kill him? Donut: Nah I think he'll be alright. Probably with just a few bald spots. Ruby: Okay... By the way, Yang, what is Omega? Yang: Hey don't ask me, I only heard it from the guards. But from the way your team reacted, it looks like they know what it is. Ruby: Do you? Sarge: Of course we know him. He's our greatest nemesis. A crazed computer program that tried to kill all of us with his rockets and his laughs. Ah, those were the good old day. Simmons: No it wasn't! He made me call, Sarge a cocksucker!

WHACK!

Simmons: OW! Sarge: Still haven't forgive you for that. Donut: He tried to kill us with a robot army. Lopez: Incluso me secuestró y me convirtió en su asistente personal del mal. Ruby and Yang:... Huuuuuh? Simmons: Christ, let me tell you in detail. Long story short, he's an angry unstable megalomaniac AI used by a mercenary the Blues hired years ago. He went loose and started trying to kill every last one of us while possessing the body of conscientious objector with a rocket launcher. He was destroyed when he went into a Pelican with a bomb rigged inside it. Do you get the jist? Ruby:... Yang:... Ruby: I got lost when you said 'conscientious objector with a rocket launcher'. Simmons: Ugh... you know, forget what I said! Donut: C'mon, Simmons. You'll have to try harder. Give a story a little... 'pizzazz'. Ruby: I don't know what they're talking about, but I really wanna be in their world for five minutes. Yang: Totally. It must've been very fun here before you came. Simmons: Sigh, I don't understand. How did Command get their hands on him? Didn't the Pelican blew up with him and Tex inside? Sarge: Of course it did. I made sure he stayed dead by adding more payload inside the ship, strong enough to obliterate everything in a fifteen mile radius into space dusts. That explosion was a huge sight to behold! Lopez: Realmente no era tan grande. Simmons: And did you remove the ship's radio before that?

Both stared at each other for a moment.

Sarge:... Ah fiddlesticks. Simmons: HOW COULD YOU FORGET ABOUT THE RADIO?! Caboose: Hello! Weiss: Quiet!

Someone's calling from outside.

Yang: Who's that? Simmons: The Blues. Sarge: Captain Ahab's Barnacles, they must be here to salvage the ship for themselves. Damn vultures! Donut, Rose, go handle them. Donut: Wha- what about you guys? Sarge: One: Me and Lopez are trying to wake Grif up with EXTRA pain. And Two: Simmons' is needed here to find where O'Malley is being held at. The black box might contain information where did was being headed. Simmons: I would love to do that, Sir. IF YANG DIDN'T DESTROY THE COMM'S ROOM! Yang: I said I was sorry! Ruby: Why not call, Vic? Maybe he can ask you. Simmons: Oh please. He isn't that dumb enough to give us, O'Malley's exact location... unless... Sarge, permission to rip out the Warthog's radio. I have an idea. Sarge: Now wait a minute, you can't just rip out a piece of the Warthog! That's a penalty of- Simmons: I can do extra shifts. Sarge: Deal! Yang: Hey what about me? I can also fight those guys too. I really need to stretch this punching muscles of mine. Sarge: Punching muscles, hmm? I see why not. Permission granted. Alright, Lopez. Ready to pour that acid on him. Ruby: Yes! It's good to have you fight by my side. Yang: Hey, you're not going to let me miss out the fun. So, Donut. How many out there? Donut: Two. Yang: Two?! I expected more than fifty. Donut: Nah just two. There was suppose to be three more but I'm not sure why they didn't come along. Ruby: Hmm... maybe it's a Blue tactic. The two waiting outside are acting as a distraction while the other three are prepared to ambush us. Yang: That means we'll be surrounded. But that ain't a problem for me once I kick their asses. Donut: You against five of them? Wow, you're a bigger badass than I thought. Ruby: Trust me, she is. Back at basic, she destroyed an entire team all by herself without needing any help. It was awesome. Yang: Thank you. So what do you know about those two? Donut: Well there's Caboose on the tank and then there's Weiss. Yang: A tank, huh? That'll be easy once I throw my homemade... who was the other person?

Outside

Weiss: This is the Blue team! Come out with your hands up or be destroyed. There's no point in fighting 'cause we have a tank that outguns your pathetic little Warthog. But if do you seek battle, that's fine by me. That is all.

She turns off the megaphone and turns to Caboose, sitting inside the tank.

Weiss: Alright, Michael. We're just here to talk about the ship, no need to go all guns blazing. Caboose: If we're here to talk with the Red, why did we bring, Sheila here? Weiss: Just for precaution. Plus, I intend to see a shell liquifying both Ruby's legs. Caboose: Okay. Hi, Donut!

Donut appeared on the roof alone. Where is the rest of the Reds?, Weiss thought. Something's up and good thing she brought the tank.

Donut: Hi, guys! Hey where's everybody else? Weiss: Busy scrubbing the floors with their toothbrushes. That's what happens when you don't report anything important to your leader. (whisper) Keep an eye out for, Ruby. We're here to talk about the ship. Do you know what happened to it and where it came from? Donut: Didn't you guy's hear the crash yesterday? Caboose: Weiss didn't hear it because she was singing in the bathroom when it happened. Donut: Ooh can she sing Mordern Major General? Weiss: No. Donut: Sorry, guys. But there's nothing left to trade with you except ash and stuff. And it wasn't carrying anything too. Weiss: We're not here to trade. We got enough SMGs in the armory. How can you be sure it wasn't carrying anything? Donut: Yang told us. Weiss: I-I-I'm sorry, can you repeat what you said? Donut: I said... Yang: (offscreen) Shh! Not now. Donut: I should go back inside. We're quite busy today. Grif fainted not too long ago. Sarge and Lopez are trying to wake him up. Simmons' working on a pet project on communication and I was sewing silk for the winter. Weiss: Silk?! You don't use silk for the winter, you idiot! And winter isn't coming in another six months. Donut: I mean- Sangheili silk. It's a very nice alternative to wool... kinda Weiss: Really? And tel me, what is Rose doing? Donut: Making runs around the base. Weiss: Oh you mean... HER?

Weiss sticks out her foot slightly up in the air. Then a flash of red accident trips on the leg and crashes on the tank, head first. Ouch, that did not go as plan.

Ruby: Ow...! Weiss: Ah, poor old, Rose. Always forget that I've read every move she makes back at Beacon. Alright, Donut, enough games...

HISSSSS

The sound of hissing caught her attention. It came from next to her and... oh no. A plasma grenade is stuck onto the turret!

Caboose: Why do hear a snake hissing? Weiss: MICHAEL, GET OUT OFF THERE!

Caboose quicky jumps out from the tank. They both ran away until the grenade explodes, blowing the tank into pieces. Bye bye, Sheila (or her body), you will not be missed.

BOOOM!

Caboose: SHEILA, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

At Blue Base.

Church and Tucker could see the mushroom cloud erupted on the field. Must be one hell of a fight out there.

Tucker: Man I'm glad we're here cleaning up the base. Hey, Church can I burrow your toothbrush? Church: No.

Back at Red Base.

Weiss: KUFF KUFF... Michael, are you alright? Caboose: Yes, I'm fine. But Sheila... sniff... is dead. Weiss: What the hell was that? There's no way a plasma grenade can create an explosion that big! Yang: Unless it was made by me, YOU WHITE HAIRED BITCH!

That voice, that tone. No it couldn't be. She turned to the direction of the voice and sees a Red soldier carrying the same weapon that almost split her head into a bloody mess. And the only one carrying it is...

Weiss: Oh no...

Yang Xiao Long.

Yang: Hello, Weiss. Long time no see. Caboose: Weiss, is that the angry friend you talked about? Weiss: Yes. Yes she is... RUUUUN!

Weiss grabs Caboose's hand and run away from Yang. However they were stopped when three more plasma grenades land in front of them and exploded, creating two large craters roughly about 12 meters in diameter, six meters in depth.

Weiss: Oh crap! This is Weiss Schnee to Blue base, we require reinforcements, NOW! Yang: NO ONE'S COMING TO SAVE YOUR FIRST CLASS ASS, SCHNEE! Just you, me and these two babies, Mr. and Mrs Fisty.

Yang cracks her knuckles as she approaches towards them, with raging red eyes focused on the one and only teammate who ran away.

Weiss: AAAAAH! MICHAEL, KEEP THAT PSYCHOPATH AWAY FROM ME!

Weiss quickly hides behind Caboose, cowering herself away from that golden monster that tried to kill her. Yang stopped as her path is block by Caboose who stood calmly between her and Weiss.

Caboose: Hello... big scary lady... with big boobs. My name is, Caboose. You must be,... Yang. Yang:... Caboose:... Yang:... Uhm...hi? Do I know you? Caboose: Yeah, Weiss told me that t you are the angry friend. She also told me that you and Ruby are sisters and were part of a team in the letters R, W, B and Y. Ruby: Actually it's pronounced... ow my nose!... 'Ruby', with a 'W'. Caboose: Oooh! Wait if it's pronounce Ruby, shouldn't 'W' be a 'U'? Yang: (whisper) Who is this guy? Ruby: That's Caboose. Dumbest member in the Blue team here. Yang: A mentally retarded guy serving in the Blue army, huh? I'll deal with you later.

Yang glares at Weiss.

Yang: So, Weiss. This is where you've been. Stationed in a desolate box canyon with nothing but sand and rocks. I thought you'd be in the Atlesian army by now. Weiss: GULP! Yang: What's the matter, still afraid to face me after all these years? Hmph, how pathetic. To even call yourself a soldier is just embarrasing. Caboose: Hey you can't talk, Weiss like that! She's my best friend. Yang: You... her friend? Caboose: Yeah she may be a little noisy. Weiss: Gee, Michael. Thanks. Yang: SHUT UP! Weiss: EEK! Yang: So you know who I am, that's something. But do you know what she did before she came here? Caboose: Yeah she told me that she was in a base with you during an exam. But it got attack by space pirates who want to steal things, arrrgh. She was then given orders by her teacher to escape because she had to bring back important dates before the pirates steal it. You know I like the Egyptian ones. They're very chewy like gum. Ruby: Don't you mean 'data'? Caboose: Yeah that too. Yang: And what else did she tell you about us? Caboose: Well I know is that Ruby disobeyed her orders to save everybody, leaving the pirates to take over the base. And you kicked a guy's balls because he ordered you to tell everyone to fight back despite the pirates winning. And... Weiss, what did Blake do...? Yang: TO HELL WITH ORDERS! Caboose: Mommy!

Caboose stepped back away from Yang's explosive wrath.

Yang: Those soldiers back couldn't stand a chance against them! I don't give a damn what our superiors ordered us to do, but me and Ruby won't stand idly to see them get slaughtered. And Weiss over there, just left us and those people to die, just for what? A PLACE IN ATLAS' MILITARY! Is that something you would consider her a 'friend'? Caboose:... Yep. Yang: Good... wait, what? Caboose: Uhm... because, no matter what your friends did, he'll always be your friend. Yang: That... is the most stupidest quote I've ever heared. IT MATTERS WHAT SHE DID... TO US! Now move aside so I can pummel her bitchy face! Caboose: Nope. Yang: Sigh... then you left me no choice. EAT THIS!

Yang raises her fist and strikes Caboose, only for him to catch it mid air. His quick reflexes surprised everyone. Yang's tries to yank off her fist from his tight grasps...

CRUNCH

... followed by the sound of a metallic crunch. Caboose finally lets go of her hand. Yang looks at her right hand and was shocked to see her hand has been crushed.

Yang: WHAT AND HOW?! Caboose: Sorry! I squeezed it too tight. Weiss: Holy... shit. Ruby: Is... that normal? Yang: No. This was supposed to be made out of titanium and he crushed it... as if it was paper. That's so... metal... RETREAT!!! Ruby: RUNAWAY!!!

Yang and Ruby, run like hell from Caboose. Oh the sweet irony.

Donut: (from afar) Hey, guys. Why are you running, aren't you supposed to fight them? Yang: We're not running. This is the Xiao Long secret technique! Ruby, you didn't tell me he was that strong! Ruby: I didn't know, just keep running!

Weiss emerged from the safety of Caboose's back. She can't believe, they're gone.

Weiss: My God, Michael. How did you do that? Caboose: Oh it was nothing. I don't like bullies harming my best friends. And I like catching hands. Weiss: Nothing? I've never seen Yang run away from fight before. That's was... AWESOME. Since when did you do workout? Caboose: I just drank a lot of milk till my muscles grow strong. That's what they said in the commercials. Weiss: Milk makes your bones stronger, not muscles you beautiful dope. Now then, let's get the hell out of here before Yang come's back!

In the caves.

TZZT

Vic: Hello, Project Freelancer Operational Command Center. This is your friendly neighborhood, Virtual Intelligence Computer, calling from Blood Gulch. ???: This is Command. What seems to be the problem? Vic: Finally, been calling for ten minutes. Hey listen, your drunk driver called me last night and asked if he can parked right next to the Red base. I allowed and now the ship's here, burnt up to a crisp and sitting there like it's nobody's business. ???: Copy that, V.I.C. Is it the ship, Sanctuary? Vic: That's the one. ???: And what is the status of the subject? Vic: She is hot as hell. Where did you guys pick her up, the Red Light Outpost? ???: Ahem. Vic: Sorry. The good news is, she's a-ok. The bad news, she told the Reds what happened. They're willing to hide that fine body to stroll around their territory, tsk tsk. Send in those Recovery people to pick her up. Also get aclean up crew for this mess. Seeing that ship here is an eyesore. ???: Acknowledge. We'll send in a Recovery squad. And one more thing. How's the Alpha? Vic: Still a hot head as always. Why do you ask? ???: Nothing. We just want to know its current status, that's all. Hehehe... nyehehehehehehe... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! YOU FOOLS! THE DARKNESS WILL CONSUME YOU ALL! NYEHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!... Command, out.

TZZT

Vic: Hmm, must've said somethin' funny. Ah, oh well I'm sure it's nothing serious!

A/N: Sorry the is so rushed. My degree started and I've been busy lately

Deviantart: https://www.deviantart.com/necroceph

#weiss schnee #yang xiao long #michael j caboose #Red vs Blue #rwby #Rooster Teeth #monty oum

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sole-cuore-amore-e-droga · 6 years ago

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Tel Aviv 2019: Straight outta Lithuania to Eurovision with a rampaging mess that gave a lukewarm conclusion

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Oh dear.

When it comes to my country to choose, they’re often chosen to be overlooked by the Eurofan community, especially because of our insanely long procedure of choosing, that would often cause everyone to hear the songs live more times than they’re supposed to. And it seemed to be a similar case this year because while not as long as usual, we still had 7 shows + an additional week break (that allowed me to watch some more Destination Eurovision! Woo!), and a big pile to songs to swim through, usually submitted by all ranges of songwriters who’re willing just to get their names known to the world creditswise (looking at you Ashley Hicklin and co.) and often are paired with our talent show rejects that fade away as soon as they come in if their song and their chances crash out before the final (see Germantė Kinderytė - she didn’t make it to the lives of The Voice Lithuania, had a killer song though that didn’t make it to the semis thanks for the jury annihilating her pointswise TWICE and only ended up lucky the televoters’ 10 was enough to get her through. Another example: Benas Malakauskas, who got lucky to be on the selection for two years in a row, but did not go beyond the AUDITIONS in said talent show! Yet progressed to the second round at farthest both of his years). And even then, you’re never sure if these songs ARE even on the lineup. Last year we had angry Erica Jennings pulling her song out of the comp just because of having to hear the juries critique others so abrasively (at least abrasively I guess?) one show in, but then it suddenly re-emerged back, but instead sung by Monika Marija - fresh off her The Voice Lithuania victory. This year we had some names pulling off for no reason, some names pulling for A reason (like Sasha Song who couldn’t turn up for the live recording of Heat 4 because of his song not sounding the best way possible, and was fined for it lol), and some names being added last minute or even changed unexpectedly (Tomas Sinickis, you heard of him? Now he underwent by Tommy Modric... yes the footballer Modric). Which is as crazy as MIIIIHAAAAIIIII deciding not to compete in the Romanian NF because “it’s all rigged and me a tryhard won’t feel too safe enough to finally win on this one” oh boo-hoo, think of the kids who never liked your sorry ass anyway. And think of the kids in general before showcasing your half-naked or mostly-naked body in front of them.

Excuse me for my long ass paragraph number 1, BUT we were actually so dang dramatic this year that I cannot contain myself without letting y'all know why this NF deserved a much better winner to come out of it rather than THAT that actually came to be. I'm a native so I know every single detail. So if ya wanna know why exactly I'm underwhelmed, read 'em up. If you wanna know that I'm just underwhelmed, just skip ahead to the review, idc. Did you make your choice? Well then. Let's delve into the details:

• The first clear competitor, Monika Marija, releases a song that people really want to see in the selection but she assures everyone it’s not THE song. Then she shows her other one, and people honestly want the first one back, but grow to adapt to it.

• Lineup reveal happens with her in it, wbk. Along with some other interesting names like Jurgis Didžiulis (off InCulto), Jurgis Brūzga and etc.

• First show is filmed and broadcasted as normal. But, after the broadcast, a pissed-off parent is mad at his son’s result on Facebook (and the result seemed fair enough to me actually despite liking the song because it’s such a second-hand NF tier entry that isn’t meant to last that I’d even see fizzle out in... A Dal for example).

• Also a minor lulz related to one contestant’s song lyrics sounding like Russian swearwords (you know the ones the kids are yelling on CS:GO) but that was fixed

• Lineup changes that include Sasha Song, the second-most-recent X Factor Lithuania season winners at the time 120 (yep that’s the band’s name) and some other guy who came and went last minute without a word from him back as to why lol. (As well as one of the lost starlets of 2018, Emilija Valiukevičiūtė, was initially announced in the first lineup reveal but fizzled out by Heat 4 as well.)

• And it turns out Monika Marija chose both of her latest releases (including the first one she said she won’t enter) to participate because her fans want it so and she felt like it, although fans were more attached to the 1st one she entered.

• Jurgis Didžiulis brings Erica Jennings with him - yep, the same lady who withdrew because of the jury has grew some thick skin over a year and joined the lineup too. Among other things.

• Second show had a major televoting issue that affected the scores massively (basically only a few hundred votes were missing lol), and had the issue affected any of the nonqualifiers enough for them to qualify, they’d be added to the semis as a wildcard. So naturally, someone of the NQs complained about it BUT it turned out it did not affect anyone anyway. Another act got pissed for being mistreated by juries too by the way.

• Sasha Song withdraws last minute for reasons above, and his fine is 2000 euros. Well, now you have to know that if you, fellow Lithuanian, want into Eurovizijos, you need to be a bit rich to accept circumstances like these, otherwise you’re totally fucked.

• Heat 3 happens as normal BUT Heat 4 brings in some fire as it turns out that one of the contestants’ stepfather was offering his company’s services (like, those outside children play parks’ assets) for televotes to her dear stepdaughter’s song, with her EVEN NOT SEEING ANYTHING WRONG WITH IT. LRT, as clever as they are, decide to null her televotes in protest. Shame tho as the song was good, and way better Laurell Barker submission than the ones she got on ESC this year.

• One contestant, Alen Chicco (also from X Factor Lithuania, may or may not even be from the same season that was won by 120), causes a bit of controversy by having a black man on his performance

• During the semi stage, Monika Marija asks her fans not to vote for the 1st song she submitted to the selection, but rather support her 2nd song that won the semi comfortably, way after the folks were attached to her 1st song already and claiming it’s better for Eurovision (no it’s not), but it backfires spectacularly when the jury has enough guts to make her qualify with it, even if the televote for it was rather low.

• But before semi 2 happened and Monika Marija sang her weaker song, a contestant with the name of Migloko resorts to middle-finger the audience during her performance for no reason in semi 1.

• Monika Marija succesfully goes on to withdraw one of her songs (the one from semi 2) just to not split her fanbase even further when it comes to the final, therefore not lose. Also has to pay a fine of 2000 perhaps.

• Jurijus Veklenko, which was one of the front-runners along Monika Marija, was accused of having his song published on Soundcloud a year too early, but as a demo version, therefore not commercially viable enough for ESC rules. Later he was let off easy by LRT, but decided that EBU should investigate and report if they think it’s not fine, but if he was allowed to compete with that, he was possibly not in danger afterall.

• And since Monika Marija has got only 1 song, her final spot she got with that other song was given up for the aforementioned Alen Chicco.

• Finally, Monika Marija was still THE front runner of all this, having a sizeable amount of a fanbase enough to support her, even more so than the eventual winner... yes, she did happen not to win in the end. U mad?

And even if Monika Marija would have honestly been an anticlimactic winner, this next guy is even more so, because although shocking, his song is pretty much by-the-numbers Eurovision NF pop you’re gonna get, although not as cheap as the one written by constant NF failures that submit their stuff for countries like Moldova, Belarus, Romania and Malta (that until Malta ditched their NF). And the one that ended up winning is the said person whose song was uploaded a year too early as a demo - Jurijus Veklenko, but for now, he’s pretty much needed to be addressed as Jurijus. No wait, he’s back to being Jurijus Veklenko, but he dropped the “us” from his name, that’s odd. (By the way, he’s the only ounce of Ukraine you’ll ever have this year - his father is of that nationality, hence why the ever-so-Slavic Veklenko surname)

“Run with the Lions” is the song name, and for a title as anthemic as this, the song... not so much. Like I said, it’s pop, and it’s good that it’s pop, but it’s just pop. I doubt that Jurijus’s songwriter team did anything to distinguish the demo from its final product, hence why it was so easily autodetected somehow. Like, the structure is there, the lyrics are there (but what even ARE they? “if you wanna see, just open your eyes”?? “if you want a voice, just open your mouth”????), but where’s the depth, man? I really felt like I needed more of this song, especially in the choruses. Like, some additional background instruments like strings wouldn’t have hurt? In fact, this song has a slight revamp (I’m saying “slight” because no marginal changes had been done) that adds up some acoustics in the background of the 2nd verse and only changes one line (”there’s no need to be afraid” now is “you don’t have to be afraid”. Wow, revolutionary. What about “You don’t got to hide away”?? Why repeating “You don’t” twice in the prechorus???!!!... ooh I’ll be here all day if I only talked about nitpicks)... and it yet still feels too little. Thankfully the choruses have someone shouting something like “huh huh hoo” synthetically to liven it up somehow.

Yet somehow, out of nowhere, I admit liking this? Our boi is capable of singing live - both high and low; his voice and the song fit in delightfully with each other; and while basic, the melody is pleasant, non-offensive, non-ear-grating... perhaps the problem of it all is that it’s too inoffensive? Something that flows away in the wind and passes you by without you knowing. Something that you’re told that it’s not background filler and you were just not paying attention to the actual music that was playing. Something so algorithmic, you’re easily able to make your ears cancel it out as it were just some sort of white noise!

Yeah, I don't think I want to describe us all that much. It's a pretty okay pop song, it's nothing groundbreaking (bar the message of being free to do all you can do), I enjoy the sound of it, it doesn't annoy me, I can fully be down to supporting Jurijus and his voice. Too bad it's in a year AND a semi where MoR pop songs DON'T dominate - we're way past those ages. To stand out, it needs to be anthemic, it needs to have a stage presence, it truly needs some X factor, and our staging nor our song offers it. And guess what, various other people are still mourning over the loss of Monika Marija, which I find perfectly reasonable, but who would have to lend us their final spot instead if she won? Armenia? Romania? Denmark? So many questions, so little time left to answer them all.

Right now I will just conclude with me saying that I like this. It's inoffensiveness is pleasant, and in any other year we'd be the perfect filler songs for the final, like we were in the past. Cool cool.

Approval factor: Anything that will make me forget how much of my nerves did I waste over stanning someone in our selection while knowing that Ieva will win is a good noodle in my book. Jurijus wasn’t exactly one of my favourites (you’ll see why when you hit the unfortunately long NF corner section), but that’s perfectly fine, seeing that I can finally be a proud supporter of my own country’s song.

Follow-up factor: we're a completely and utterly random nation, sending anything our juries found amusing the most at the time. So don't bother about follow up consistency every being good or bad. We're just going with our own flow and... that's basically it. Though we could, on an occasion, do better with picking songs, that's for sure. And maybe finally we will not have a song that's littered with "oh oh oh, yeah yeah yeah" kind of sounds... like seriously, "Run with the Lions" has a bridge that mostly consists of "ooooooohhhhhhh" and then one actually non-interjective line at the end. (At least in Tel Aviv you'll be hearing the backings murmuring "run with the, run with the, run with the lions" during it, and that's something.) I love it that we never change in our random tactics, I'd just love it more to see some actual change in the song quality, y'know? THEN will it be a good follow-up.

Qualification factor: I’m so devastated at saying this, but foreigners say that we’re probably going down to deat meat levels this year. But I still have hope in us qualifying. Believe it or not, the people out there still don’t buy into the Lithuanian diaspora power, and genuinely believe that our harmless tune is chanceless. I only understand that it cannot work its magic when we send something risqué and incredibly opinion dividing (but most people dislike it anyway), but just look at our results on the years when we were generally received bad when we were just boring. “C’est ma vie” qualified. “Something” qualified. Back when Donny Montell was such an unknown in the Eurovision lore because 2012 was his first year and his song was considered “dated”, he still qualified. See something here? We still can, and WILL, be able to pull through possibly, and I don’t doubt it that diaspora will lap up our mediocre song because Lithuania. Patriotism strong! (Oh and a handful of votes for Jurijus for being so hot.)

NATIONAL FINAL BONUS

I already discussed the Eurovizijos drama in lenghty detail, so expect me not to re-iterate everything down here shortly, but what you need to know off it is that it had every single drama aspect you’d ever want - faulty line-ups, voting frauds, televoting malfunctions, forced plagiarism accusations, too-early-published-song accusations, late entry withdrawals, qualifier replacements, technical difficulties allowing to repeat a performance and some contestants being visibly pissed off by the jury (and to some extent, the overall) results. A total jumble <3 Never change, Lithuania. (except for the godawfully smug-ass HoD, I started to get tired of him AND his bald head doing this to us. It's been 10 years, retire already.)

So it’s better to talk about all the non-dramatic things I liked about our NF this year! From songs to performances, from shits and giggles to something serious - I’m taking you for a hefty ride.

• First and foremost, I actually didn’t mind one of the Monika Marija’s songs? Yeah, “Light On” was a good and polished pop track that has THAT power to get you good, with them strong sublime female vocals. Even if it kind of sounded like an Ikea store version of "Stay with Me" by Sam Smith. Not that there's anything bad with it, but any kind of plagiarism cases have and will always be barred from Eurovision if noticed by the organizers. This is not 100% dead-on ripoff, but there are shades of knock-offery here and there. And it's even a better "Stay with Me", and with a better message - Monika Marija reminisces of that one time she was almost dying herself, but she's here, she's survived, and you musn't hang her off the lifeline. At least it's "Light On" that got all the love in the NF in the end and not the painfully mediocre "Undo" ripoff wailfest "Criminal". It was so slow and plodding and I never got why so many people loved it. If "Undo" was a product, "Criminal" would have been its "made in China" counterpart. Anyway, here's "Light On". And please don't spam me messages with how much this would have been a contender for top 10 over Jurijus. :P In Eurovision it's an added bonus if your faves do well - the fact that they were in Eurovision is the most important thing, and I perfectly understand why do you miss it here on ESC grounds. Just... I'm tired of "MM top 10, Jurijus bottom 3 in semi", okay? Monika Marija can try our NF again. She’s very talented, and there’s a possibility that we’ll see her in ESC in the end anyway. Pave the way for our Polyglot Queen, Eurovision 20xx! ^^

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• Now here's for once a cool Lithuanian artist that didn't come from a TV talent show! Antikvariniai Kašpirovskio Dantys ("antiquarian teeth of Kashpirovsky") is probably one of the coolest Lithuanian bands that I know - doing absolutely any kind of genre they're pleased with - from folk to rock to ska to acoustic pieces - I admire them for being so diversive! Too bad they entered with one of my lesser favourite tracks in their entire discography - "Mažulė" (one of the many ways to say "baby", as in, trying to call your lover cute, female gender case. Can also mean "baby girl" in this context). I have nothing against this kind of track they thrown in the selection, ska music and Eastern musical elements are gooooooood, plus I finally got to know what is a "forró" that doesn't mean "hot" in Hungarian - it's a music style popular in Brazil! However, the chorus could have at least sounded more "party"-ier. It doesn't really excite me to dance the window-cleaning dance to it. (Oh yeah and do you remember that this song is about a car, not an actual lover? They're basically confessing their love to an automobile. How they're protecting it from vandals, how did they dream of getting the car since young age, how wouldn't they change their car for any other. Romantic, I'd say.) However I am happy for the over 30 year olds that find this song completely and totally amusing when I can't quite seem to. I do say that I like those elements, the brass and all that. It was the only Lithuanian song in the sea of English ones in the final (just like A Dal was, but inverse - almost all songs in Hungarian but one English (and a bit Russian), and that's an achievement. AKD should be proud of themselves for impacting both our nation AND the international viewers which found fun in this! Respect. Maybe they'll win our NF soon if they keep on winning the audiences, or they'll probably GTFO forever. IDK, the latter is more plausible, sadly. They're so unique that they cannot be just a thing for more editions - just one for a try out, and that's enough.

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• So, Alen Chicco. What’s so special to have him in the final instead of Monika Marija's weaker entry? Well, he's just a fantabulous persona, unique in every step he takes. And surely I was excited to see him preparing something for Eurovizijos after I read his name on the participants list. And then his entry did come. I wasn't quite sure what to think of "Your Cure" at first but the chorus is a pop beauty I hold up to myself somehow <3 now I find the song nice as a whole, the theatrical-like verses peak my curiousity though the prechoruses feel too drawn out a bit and could have had some big pauses be shortened or removed... yeah. But the most interesting thing is HIS LOOKS <33 his wardrobe and level of expressiveness is vast, I love it how eveything here was different each and every time he performed, and it all was always presented incredibly differently. I admire ONE (1) chameleon

which Alen Chicco are you today? ✨

• And that's almost basically it I have to show you concerning my faves? Yeah, I definitely had enough of our NF having this many songs too, I almost had no good favourites that made it to the semis and people would care about slightly if they'd be willing to. Nothing I could be excited over, nothing I could be passionate about as I was last year about my fave. Well I did like some qualifiers to semis but I don’t think they are THAT worth y’all’s attention all THAT much... However, I will definitely let you in on two of my personal non-finalist faves. Allow me to introduce the first band whose song is a guilty pleasure of mine only - it's Laimingu Būti Lengva ("it's easy being happy") with "Pasaulio vidury" ("in the middle of the world"). Now, it's not very competitive or anything, in fact the guys looked like hobos on their live performance and one of them was randomly shouting "heeeeyyyyy" a LOT of times, like a random heckler that's supposedly livening(??? is that a word???) up the performance, and they sang disappointingly... but the studio version, man. I dare you to not get hypnotized by the slow electric guitar feel. (You probably won't but idc.) I love it, I love the beats and how trappy but cool they sound on those verses, I love the slow soft rhythm, I definitely love the whole melodic execution, and the vocals actually sound alright on there (mainly thanks to autotune but yeah whatever). I have problems though - with a band like this, I barely see how can I get genuine enjoyment out of this song myself without having to slap myself in the back for admitting to actually like this. So I call it my "guilty pleasure" quite a lot of times. The song's structure is quite interesting, but it's mainly the repetitive verses and choruses smeared across the whole song at random. I get the song's point so much that I hate the band for hammering it into my head all this whole time - the song's protagonist met a red-haired and blue-eyed girl named Isabel in Portugal (the supposed "middle of the world"), they fell in love, that's it. But they emphasize it a lot that the girl was blue-eyed... not even I would if I had to write this song, and *I* have a blue-eyed people bias. The whole package was completely unappealing and with how they showed it it didn’t really look like something that even needs a staging or Eurovision at all, but I still keep this song to myself, and will definitely replay it a lot this summer. Just as much as the song that you'll actually get to watch the performance of down below - it's "Song of My Life" by Soliaris & ForeignSouls. It's cool, funky, catchy, vibey, laidback and summer-fun-infested. I cannot really describe separate parts all that much because all flows in so well. It's a good song to chill out and have a cocktail too. And it features a rap part that doesn't bother me at all! Good one, Soliaris. I didn't like your music back when you did mediocre 00s R'n'B, but you positively surprised me, both by returning to our NFs after like 9 years of absence AND bringing this gem. It didn't need an extreme staging - just some dudes having fun and that's it. And they brought it. It saddens me that these kind of songs don't stand a chance to qualify to the very final in our NF anymore, as they kind of would have in 2012 or so, but I'm still happy they exist. I only have had some issues with the lyrics laying out the words in sentences ("spend with me this beautiful night" bothered me a bit because if you translate it to Lithuanian in the exact same sentencing way, it'd make even more sense than it does to me now), but other than that, I fucking loved "Song of My Life". It might as well be my overall NF winner, haha.

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• Oh and how could I forget Tiramisu??? That's perhaps my biggest discovery of this year. They moved on from utter unknowns to... still unknowns, but more known for the Eurovision fandom that does care about Lithuanian NFs. Here you have an oddly titled song, "The Smell of Your Eyes" (and you thought Safura smelling lipstick was extreme - but to her credit, lipstick DOES have a faint odor, doesn't it?), which is both insane AND original, and insane original is obviously encouraged. And the whole song sounds pretty damn good for a band that no one heard of and that used to do jazzy-ish and inoffensive musical flairs before. Here we have slight influences of folk even! And the violins, too. A generally charming piece that draws you into a pagan forest. Too bad the staging was completely misunderstood - they definitely had to put on some guy with a cheap Iron Man mask to pretend to give the band some intensity... lousy move. It could've looked way better if it were more mysterious and forest-like and had a more enchanting camerawork. And a little more colors than emerald and forest greens, too. The video clip looked way better and more high-budget than the staging came to be. Observe:

Felt like everything beautiful was stripped of it because the music video could not be repeated on stage. Ah well. The televoters gave them love but the jury did not let them to improve, and down the Bermuda triangle of fallen female violinists from the 2019 season went a lady of the name Rima Tamo, together with Gabriella Laberge and Tilla Török (who did not even appear on stage at that time of need!). Here's a spooky fact for all these 3: female violinists that all featured on songs in E minor, performed 1st in their respective heats/semis, were really loved by televote but hated by the juries, missed out on the next stage of the NF by 1 place. Coincidence? A curse? Tiramisu were obviously disgusted by the jury trashing their staging so they talked about hating them on Facebook. What's worse that they could have actually qualified if they've gotten at least 9 more telepoints that could've pushed them to get 10 televote points in general rather than 8, all thanks to a televote count error that removed large portions of votes. And that way they could have been wildcard qualifiers instead because they would have still gotten 8 televote points with the actual televote numbers, but the organizers of the NF said that if the televote failure would have hurt anyone's place in the final, they would have wildcard-qualified instead. No one did not, so screw it. At least "The Smell of Your Eyes" remains THAT song - lots of folk, lots of violins, lots of effort put into it, and the people actually loved it for that. Just that it's so sad that the jury didn't let them improve overtime... just like Hungarian jury didn't let Leander Kills go further... a shame, really.

• And now, onto the non-entry-events and stuff that happened, besides some actual good jury shade (like the one time at least one juror says that “you wouldn’t win even if all the contestants got sick”, technical errors in the production (thanks to one of them, one of the semifinal acts actually got to perform again... but the televote didn’t give her votes anyway lmao) and the constant reminder of one of our charities which gives tickets to Eurovision for the best disabled person story.. I don’t know where that is but our NF somehow acquired a skit from an Austrian man that’s been exploring stuff in Israel (I think) because of Eurovision this year... and man did I think that this skit was rather... hmmm... middle-ground funny? Slightly too annoying but still kind of alright to look at? It was fun, but certainly odd to find out about that it even exists.

• After feeling so disappointed with Hungarian juries's decisions on the night of February 22nd, I left my room to watch our NF's final on our living room TV, hoping for everything just to end already because I did not expect anything good happening on this final. I haven't even decided to go back to watch A Dal and see AWS reprise their song a little less louder than when they competed last year. And then our NF gave me a complete and utter surprise - The Roop reprising THEIR Eurovizijos 2018 entry. If you've been long enough here on Tumblr to know me, you would probably guess that I'm a big fan of "Yes, I Do" by The Roop, which I wanted to see winning our NF so badly last year, but in the end... you finish the quote so I don't have to. And it's odd because this year I felt the exact similar way with Hungary as with Lithuania last year - I have clear favourites I root for in both of those but deep inside I knew there was gonna be a different winner I only find okay and nothing else. (The difference is that "Az én apám" has grown on me since, "When We're Old" did not at all.) So back to discussing the interval act instead. For this one guest number of the NF's, the song began on a piano, "pretend" played by The Roop's lead singer, and then he got his butt off from the piano chair (unlike Duncan in Tel Aviv), to the microphone stand, and the song continued off sounding like its original version that was sung in last year's NF. I still love this song and even loved that version with piano at the beginning, but why did it not take over the whole song though? Just to not let the audience fall asleep before the Carousel would've? (Yes by the way, we got guest acts from other countries performing on our NF as well! But Carousel were the only ones to have a guest appearance, the other acts were either unchosen or perhaps busy doing Tel Aviv preparations, lol.) Well, good for them. I may or may not still would love The Roop entering and winning our selection someday, if they ever decide to participate again. They could've this year but they did not return, so maybe in 2021? Let this girl dare to dream for once, Lithuania ^_^

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• I love when our NF has postcards, no matter at which stage of introduction they are on. In 2016 the postcards were present in every show (the ones for the final were the best), in 2017 they were only introduced in the round 3 of heats (sometime before the semis), in 2018 - from the 2nd round of heats onwards, in 2019 though they were only for the final... what’s the punchline for this paragraph? Oh, there IS none. I just confessed my love for our NF postcards. Just keep scrolling :)

• Okay so I know no one really pays attention to our heats because we have too many of them AND we have too many songs in them, and the eliminated ones always stop mattering to everyone right away. But I'm here to bring you a favourite meme of mine that hailed just from the heats alone: miss RÙTA, who could have done much better during her performance if she didn't constantly look like she's incredibly constipated. I don't know what makes her look like that - the lipstick? the grin? her over-dramatic entry about wordly disasters, "Paradox"? I may never know, but I will let you have a good look at it if you don't want to watch the whole video I linked. Personally, I liked the red staging this song had, and the song wasn't bad, but the singer felt agonizingly nervous and never got the chance to do better, sadly. Oh and look at that sleek tattoo, mmm.

• Oh and our NF featured a metal song but it’s so formulaic and by the numbers dad metal that I didn’t even support it all that much.... however I’ll let you listen to it if you’d really like. And there's this best alternative song of this year's NF that I've heard that also ended in the semis, and it's way better than Fusedmarc's alternative (despite having some ugly beatboxing skills). Check it out too if you will.

And thankfully, that’s that for another year. I’m getting so awfully tired to compress my own NF even further more, especially with my enthusiasm for the actual quality of this NF going down the shithole with every single heat show coming after each other just like that, with more mediocre songs after more mediocre songs. I’m also openly declaring that I have barely any energy left with continuting these writeups, seeing that there’s too many to go and most of them are STILL undercooked drafts. But I’m tryna pull through. I have another completely completed review underway afterwards - just a few edits here and there on it and I’m done with it, m8s! And then I’m piling up new paragraphs after new paragraphs on other reviews.

So I hope I let you know why do I think that the end result of ours is lukewarm - from a dramatic NF there should have been a slightly dramatic winner tbh, but in the end we got a pop song that only a few people like. Brutal. And with the biggest hopes in my eyes for our success I’d like to finish this off with two words. Sėkmės, Jurijau!

#eurovision 2019 #tel aviv 2019 reviews #lithuania 2019 #jurij veklenko #run with the lions #lithuania

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eurovosion · 6 years ago

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some thoughts on this year’s entries

or i guess just a ranking with comments tacked on

albania - this year’s nf season was a let down for me, partly because a lot of the winning songs weren’t the best on offer, and partly because albania picked first and nothing could live up to it. i love the depth this has, the dark, almost tribal vibes, and most of all i love how they didn’t fuck up the revamp like they usually do. if this is staged correctly, i think this could do really well. 10/10

greece - i feel like this has been overlooked in the wider fandom, which is odd because greek entries are usually pretty polarising, for better or for worse. regardless, i really like this. it’s atmospheric, powerful as hell, and katerine is more than capable of nailing it live. don’t count greece out just yet! 9.5/10

portugal - festival da canção was easily the best nf this year and the portuguese public picked wisely. telemóveis is such an intriguing song with a really curious sound, so traditional yet so modern at the same time. i’m not 100% on the staging, but they have time to figure it out. 9.5/10

spain - la venda wasn’t the song i was rooting for in the selection (rip todo bien, never forgotten) but i’m fully on board with it now. this works so well with a big audience, and you just know that the crowd will be on his side. if this doesn’t go top 10 at the very least i’ll be stunned. 9/10

cyprus - this is just as instant as fuego for me. not sure if tamta will do as well as eleni, but the cypriot delegation has definitely found their winning formula. 9/10

malta - malta is not fucking around this year. this is a verified banger, and their best entry in years, perhaps their best ever. take as many youtube ads as you want, michela, you deserve them. 8.5/10

azerbaijan - without a doubt, azerbaijan is back with a vengeance. you can tell they’re determined to set the record straight and prove that last year was just a blip, because this is great and hopefully the live performance reflects that. 8.5/10

denmark - i really should hate this, but i can’t. it’s so innocent and cheerily optimistic in a way that i can only be jealous of whilst humming along to the chorus. this deserves to do well. 8/10

italy - it took me a little while to warm up to soldi, but once i finally got there i really started to appreciate it. i don’t think it’s a winner, but it’s a very good song, and in the end that’s all that matters. 8/10

san marino - yes, serhat is in my top 10, and what of it? you only wish your fave could write a song in ten minutes and have it go off like this. and yes, if he doesn’t qualify you’ll catch me openly sobbing in the streets for weeks. 8/10

switzerland - an unabashed bop with some actual choreography, but lacking lyrically. then again, so was fuego and that popped off live. he’s also working with the same stage director as eleni, which can only be good news for him. 7.5/10

the netherlands - don’t get me wrong, it’s a very polished song and i’m sure duncan’s great but like... is that it? this is the big fan favourite? i’m very whelmed. 7.5/10

armenia - i was expecting something like yete karogh es from srbuk, so this came completely out of left field in the best way possible. i thought we’d lost our token edgy pop song when ukraine dropped out, but armenia saved us at the last minute. the only thing i’m worried about are her vocals, because, from what i’ve seen, she isn’t the most confident performer. 7/10

serbia - another respectable but ultimately pretty safe pick from serbia this year. nevena has a really strong voice and she sells the song well, so i think she’ll avoid another moje 3 style placement. 7/10

germany - first of all, aly ryan was robbed. secondly, thank god the surprise song didn’t win. thirdly, this is alright. nothing spectacular, but it’s cute and the spinning stage was a great stylistic choice. 7/10

latvia - thank you latvia for letting this win and rejecting markus riva’s basic ass for the sixth year in a row WHEW i really love the whole atmosphere that surrounds this. barring a miracle, however, i don’t think it’ll qualify, but it’s still a good attempt. 6.5/10

sweden - i don’t think it’s john’s most solid composition, but it’s a decent entry nevertheless and it’s nice to see sweden picking an entry that isn’t generic pop again. 6.5/10

united kingdom - my only faint glimmer of national pride so far this year is that we managed to pick the only good song from the flaming garbage pile that was our nf. yeah, the lyrics are redundant and it’s a ballad by numbers, but michael gives it his all and it really pays off. 6.5/10

ireland - this will absolutely not do well but who cares, it’s fun and harmless. super chill and easy to listen, and i think sarah’s a big eurovision fan already which is nice. also i’d just like to take this opportunity to thank her for ditching the ylva and linda song she originally applied with. 6.5/10

iceland - hm. this is one where you need to listen a few times to get a full impression of what the fuck you’re hearing/seeing. i really did not like this when i first heard it alongside all the other söngvakeppnin songs (and most of them sucked lbr), but now i’m kind of ambivalent towards it. i still don’t like the screaming or the key change, but it’s something different and i can admire that. 6/10

slovenia - fine, but forgettable. she has a nice voice, but there’s a distinct lack of stage presence from the two of them and i fear that this might get lost in the semi final. 6/10

israel - i’m conflicted here. i definitely don’t think home is as bad as the fan polls and reviews imply, but it’s not great either. a verse or two in hebrew would have really elevated this and i’m a little baffled as to why the writers didn’t include even a little bit considering the contest is on home turf this year. still, kobi’s a very convincing performer and israel probably didn’t want to win again anyway. 6/10

poland - this is an odd one, which isn’t a bad thing at all in a year full of safe entries. not sure if using the bilingual version was the best shout, but it’s clearly still very polish and i’m glad to hear that they’ll be wearing the traditional clothing on stage in tel aviv. 6/10

czech republic - the chorus absolutely slaps, and if i was judging by music alone this’d probably be in my top ten. unfortunately, though, the rest of the song exists. the lyrics are truly abysmal, with some of the lines ending awkwardly and without proper rhymes where they’re needed, and the spoken-word section is genuinely unbearable. 5.5/10

austria - i honestly don’t know where to place this one. very underwhelming when it was first released, but now i feel like there’s potential here. most of austria’s recent entries have been very under the radar only to end up doing quite well. i’m not as optimistic about this as some of those, but only time will tell. 5.5/10

hungary - not a patch on his previous entry, but pleasant enough. he’s a good performer and unless the staging really sucks, he’ll do fine. 5.5/10

north macedonia - it’s a nice ballad? i guess? and, unlike a lot of their recent entrants, tamara is an established singer who we all know can sing live. there are also rumours that the delegation has been planning the performance for a while, so who knows, perhaps this’ll qualify. 5/10

georgia - this has been growing on me lately. the song itself is a bit of a bust, although the revamp helped, but oto really brings it to life on stage. even if you don’t understand what he’s saying, you can tell by the emotion in his voice that he really means it. 5/10

russia - the nightmare dream team hasn’t produced a good song in over a decade at this point, this included. kirkorov needs to quit fooling himself and let someone else have a go. 4.5/10

belgium - belgium’s had quite the glow up since 2014, but i fear they’ve gone for style over substance this year. wake up is very polished, but it doesn’t go anywhere and eliot’s live performances haven’t been convincing as of yet. 4/10

lithuania - i don’t know what was more shocking, him winning the selection or me finding out that he was lolita zero’s real voice in 2017. this isn’t awful, just very repetitive and strangely put together. 3.5/10

norway - sue me, i don’t like this. the bald guy feels out of place and out of tune, it sounds like it was written by a child, and oh my god it’s so unbearably cheap. 3/10

estonia - eesti laul was such a let down this year. usually there’s a good mix of mainstream and alternative genres, but the new producer doesn’t seem to give a shit about variety, which is a real shame. anyway, victor’s performance is slick, but he can barely sing and the song itself is nothing to write home about. 3/10

romania - when this was first selected i didn’t mind it, probably because i just really didn’t want laura bretan to win, but as the season drags on i’ve really soured to it. it feels like it lasts for a minute longer than it actually does, and the whole ay-ay-ay part was not a good choice. 2.5/10

australia - as someone who was a big fan of estonia last year, this is honestly the furthest thing from that. it comes across as quite cheap (even without the questionable staging), and the chorus really grates on me. 2.5/10

belarus - i didn’t watch the entirety of the belarusian auditions for them to reject the potato monks in favour of lidl’s own brand zara larsson. 2/10

france - this is why delegations should be wary of selecting social media stars for their national selections. yes, they might get the viewing figures up a little, but they’ll probably win and the song will be Bad. i respect his message, but holy shit is this hamfisted as hell. 1/10

finland - if anyone was wondering how darude only ever had one hit two decades ago, here is your answer. 1/10

moldova - they really don’t want to qualify this year, huh. could’ve had ca adriano celentano, but nope. basic tune, painfully simple lyrics, but i guess her voice is nice enough 1/10

croatia - this... is awful. upsettingly so. at least jacques’ last entry had a novelty factor, but he’s doomed this poor kid to failure. 0.5/10

montenegro - i have absolutely nothing positive to say here. honest to god one of the worst songs i’ve ever heard, and no amount of clumsily shoehorned in folk instrumentation was ever going to save this. i can only pray that they’re spending their preparation time wisely and taking singing lessons, but considering that they probably blew half the budget on the music video, it’s unlikely. 0/10

as for potential winners, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

a lot of the big fan favourites don’t have a winning vibe about them, so we might be in for a shock this year. please let it be albania or greece

also feel free to drop me an ask if you want to chat about last year’s entries since i kind of ditched tumblr for a year or two lmao

#god that's a straight up wall of text i'm sorry #i tried to format it as best i could i promise #but i am Very rusty #eurovision

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hamilton-one-shots · 6 years ago

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Hamilton High School AU 63

He tried to break away, but the arms were too strong around his waist. "Who the fuck are you?"

"You'd think you know. Last time you heard me talking, it was in court, where you got off free for breaking my leg defending my stupid ex."

James Reynolds. John kept fighting his grip and he'd usually be out of it without a fight, but he felt so weak. And that dizziness never went away. What was happening to him?..

His answer came out of the bathroom as Reynolds dragged him towards the back entrance. John Jay came by with a sly grin.

"What did you do?.."

He held up a packet of pills. "You really should watch what you drink. Turns out, James was after you and I hate you, so I helped him out. In return, he hurts you in the worst way I know how to."

"All that time in prison because of you and Maria. I know what I'm doing."

In John's mind, he was screaming and thrashing, but whatever Jay had put in his drink simply sucked the life out of him and he was hardly moving, hardly making any noise. He was completely at their mercy.

Thomas went into the bathroom only a minute later, furrowing his eyebrows as he saw that John was gone. Maybe he already went back into the- Woah! He almost slipped on some lipstick tube. He tutted and picked it up, furrowing his eyes. The color seemed a bit too familiar. He walked out and kept looking down, finding a phone.

He felt his heart drop.

He ran out into the main hall and looked around. Think... Think... He knew this building better than anyone there. Whoever was there would find a back entrance without a fire alarm. And the closest one was... This way! He began running and went straight out of the door, fire filling his eyes at what he saw.

He ran forward and tackled the other guy off of John, beating him down into the concrete until he heard the weakest voice coming from John, calling for him. He jumped off of the half conscious stranger and gave him one last strong kick before going to John. "I'm here for you.. I'm going to see how hurt you are, okay?"

He made sure to wait for a weak nod from John before he checked under his skirt. John didn't seem to be too badly hurt, but it was clear that Thomas had only gotten there seconds too soon. He heard a camera click from behind him and turned around, growling as he saw John Jay with a phone.

“I tried to be your friend, Thomas. Have fun getting your reputation back up after this.”

Thomas jumped to his feet and grabbed the stupid thing from Jay’s hands, smashing it too pieces against the ground, about to do the same to Jay himself.

John moved around a bit and tried to sit up. "Tho... Thomas... Home..." he whimpered.

Thomas paused, giving Jay just enough time to run, and let his expression soften before he turned to John. "We have to get you some help, sunshine..”

John whimpered and shook his head.

“I’ll be with you the whole time. We have to make sure you’re okay.”

After another few seconds, John replied. “Okay...”

“Can I pick you up?.."

He nodded.

Thomas scooped him up and carried him to his car, reclining the front seat as much as he could. "Are you hurt anywhere?.. He didn't hurt you anywhere else?"

John shook his head. "He touched me..." he whimpered. "Jay.. bad stuff in my drink..."

"He drugged you?.." He sighed. "I'm calling the police. I'm not letting that monster get away with this and I'm not letting Jay run free, okay?"

John cried softly and nodded, curling up as Thomas stepped outside and did just that.

When the police and ambulance arrived, Thomas sat with John in the back of the ambulance, holding his hand as the paramedics took his vital signs.

Jay was dragged out of the building kicking and screaming and an officer behind him had the pills that he'd kept in his pocket in an evidence bag. James Reynolds was in an ambulance too, but with more officers than anyone else.

Thomas sighed. "Do you want me to get Alex?.."

He shook his head and held Thomas's hand tighter.

He nodded and kissed his hand. "Can I tell him what happened? I'll tell him you don't want anyone else around."

He nodded and Thomas did just that, seeing that Alexander had been spamming his phone.

[tomas, wers jon? I cant find him] [serisly, im worying] [if ur doin da do jus tel me, but im woryd] [tomas, thers cops and ambulans her, wer r u nd jon?] [tomas, pls! jon wont nsr me eder!]

[I'm here and John's with me. I'm going to tell you what happened, but John doesn't really want me to let you come along. xx]

[ud betr not b fucin lyng]

[I'm serious, Alexander. I told you I'd never do anything to hurt John. xx]

Alexander frowned. He just wanted to know that John was okay. [fin]

[John got drugged by John Jay and sexually assaulted by this James Reynolds guy or something. xx]

Alexander felt his heart stop. He completely shut down, unable to respond, unable to talk, unable to think. What was he supposed to think? Supposed to do? Go to sleep and act like his boyfriend hadn't just almost gotten raped? Like he didn't want him to be there right now?

"Alexander, are you alright?.. Where's John?.."

"I... I..." He began clamming up and just gave his phone to Lafayette, who went pale at the texts before frantically responding. [It's Lafayette, can I com and make sure hes okay?]

Thomas frowned and asked John. "Do you want to see Lafayette?.."

He thought for a few seconds before shaking his head. "Just you..."

"Alright.." He figured that John would change his mind later, but for now, it was best to just listen. [I'm sorry, I really am, but John says he doesn't want to see anyone else. xx]

[Thomas, if you are lying to me, I will castrate you with my bare hands.]

[I'm taking you serious, Laf. I need you to trust me for John's sake, please. xx]

He sighed. [Fine.] He gave Alexander back his phone. "Maybe he just needs his space right now... He doesn't want to see me either. He's not mad because of the pamphlet." Of course he knew that Alexander thought it was because of that.

And Lafayette was right. Alexander visibly relaxed at hearing that it wasn't only him, but only by the slightest amount. He was still worried about John.

"Let's go home, okay?.. We can talk to him later, I promise. He's going to be just fine."

Alexander nodded and let Lafayette lead him out of the hall, joining the rest of everyone in a flood towards their cars.

Lafayette sat with him in his car for a few minutes, letting everyone get to their own and letting the crowd clear up as he called Hercules. "I'm going to be with Alexander. I have to make sure he's okay."

"What about you, Laf?.. I want to make sure that you're okay too... John is like a brother to us both.."

"I'll be fine.."

Alexander reached up and grabbed his wrist. "Let him over.. He can sleep with us as long as you two aren't all gross.."

Lafayette smiled softly and nodded. "Why don't we all stay together? You, me, and Alexander?"

"Alright. I'll pick up Rosie and some clothes, then I'll be at yours. I'll see you then, baby."

"I'll see you then." Lafayette hung up and began driving, taking Alexander home.

Luckily, George and Martha were already asleep, so they got upstairs without a problem, changing in their own rooms before laying down in Lafayette's.

When Hercules got there, Lafayette let him in and he joined them upstairs with little Rosie, laying down with Lafayette and Alexander. He kissed his datemate's cheek and they all fell asleep.

Thomas paced around the waiting room as he was forced to stay there, John getting checked out somewhere in another room. He only stopped when a nurse came in, calling his name. "How is he?"

"He's going to be okay. We want to keep him just until the drugs leave his system, then do another quick evaluation, but, from the details we got from him, we highly doubt that he could have contracted any diseases, though we did make sure to test him. He should be getting those results in a few days or a week. Over all, John is going to be just fine."

Thomas sighed and relaxed. "Thank you so much.."

"It's my job. You can come see him and I think you can make a case for staying the night. You're his boyfriend?"

Thomas nodded.

"Then having you here should be nothing but beneficial for him." She smiled and led him up to John's room.

The freckled boy was laying in his bed, watching the tv in the corner and wearing a hospital gown underneath the blankets. He smiled as he saw Thomas and opened his arms for him, hugging him as he sat on the edge of the bed. "Thank you.."

"No need to thank me.. Even if I wasn't your boyfriend, I would've kicked that guy's ass without a second thought."

The nurse smiled. "He's going away for a long time. He may not have done any permanent damage, but it was damage all the same and he does have a record."

John nodded. "Thanks.."

She nodded and walked out.

Thomas laid down beside John and put an arm around him. "How are you feeling?.."

"High as hell... But I've been worse."

"Poor baby.." He kissed his forehead. "Do you need anything?"

He shook his head.

"You still don't want anyone else here?"

He shook his head again. "Just you.."

"That's fine." He smiled a bit.

"Thomas?.."

"What is it, baby?"

"Is the dress okay?"

He chuckled. "It's not in too bad shape. I'm sure Sarah would understand and help you."

John just nodded.

"Go to sleep, sunshine."

He nodded again and fell asleep, Thomas sleeping beside him.

In the morning, John woke up to a gently nudge from one of the nurses, Thomas still fast asleep beside him.

"Sorry to wake you.. I just need to ask a few questions about your condition."

He nodded. "Okay.."

"How are you feeling this morning?"

"I'm kind of sore everywhere.. And my head kind of hurts, but I'm not too bad. Like, if I had the flu."

She nodded and wrote that down. "Is there anything else?"

"No. I'm alright otherwise."

"Great." She smiled and gave him a brochure for a therapist. "I recommend seeing this doctor when you're ready. It's not necessary in the healing process, but I highly recommend it."

John nodded, pretending to consider it. "Thank you.."

"Of course. We just need to run a few quick tests, then you'll be ready to leave."

He nodded again and let her test his reflexes. He couldn't even let them test his pupil dilation the night before because he cried and thrashed as soon as it started thanks to how blown out his pupils already were. And Thomas had to hold him as they took his temperature and hold his hand as they got his dress off and checked him for physical damage. He was a mess made a whimpering child by drugs.

"All done."

John blinked a few times. Already? He only vaguely remembered a few followed instructions, but it seemed that he'd spent his attention on his own internal turmoil.

Thomas began to stir. "What time is it?.."

"It's just about to be 8 in the morning. Mr Laurens is ready to go home once you're ready. You can run and bring him a change of clothes, if you want."

Thomas nodded, then sat up and stretched once the nurse left. "I'm going to get you some clothes."

He nodded and gave him his key, checking his phone as he waited. He sighed as he saw all of the missed calls and messages mainly from Alexander. He called him, knowing that would put him more at ease than just a text.

Alexander had been half asleep, but answered in record time. "Hello?"

"Hey... It's me.. I'm okay.."

"John... Thomas told me what happened last night. I'm so sorry.."

"I'm going to be okay, I promise. I hope you know I'm not mad at your or anything... I just don't really want to see anybody.." He didn't want to be coddled, made to feel like what happened broke him. It hurt, but John had easily been through worse. Thomas knew how he wanted to be treated, not in any way special, but like he had someone there if he changed his mind. Lafayette was too soft as to try not to treat him any differently and Alexander saw John as fragile, as he'd already made clear. And Hercules would no doubt treat him differently, too, seeing John as a younger sibling. Thomas was probably the only person who wouldn't since he understood what it was like not wanting to be treated differently, most people did just that when they learned just how rich his family was, and he understood that he wasn't the only one who felt that way.

When he came back, John changed into the outfit that he'd brought him, just a simple shirt and some sweatpants, then went with him back to his apartment. John immediately took a nap with Thomas, then got up and ordered some pizza a few hours later, neither of them feeling much like cooking. John ate most of it, though he made sure to leave enough for Thomas, then got up and pulled his shoes on, looking at Thomas.

“Want to come with me?”

He got up and grabbed his shoes before asking, "Where are we going?"

"I kind of just want to go to the gym.. Blow off some steam, work out a bit or something."

"That sounds good." While he’d gone out to get John some clothes, he'd also gone home and quickly changed into a tee shirt and shorts, ready to just relax for the whole day, so he was ready. He got up and went to the door with him, walking out behind him. "Where are you going?" he asked as he walked right past the car.

"I prefer to walk."

Thomas nodded and followed him down the street. John seemed independent on the outside, but they both knew that he needed Thomas following him and keeping an eye on him for a while. "So.. what did you say to the nurse about therapy?.." He knew it was a sensitive topic, but he wanted to see what John would see.

"I said I'd think about it, but I threw the brochure she gave me into the trash.."

"I get it.. Nobody's forcing you to do anything."

John nodded and flinched as he leaned against a light pole at a crosswalk, feeling the sharp sting of static. It normally didn't bother him, but he couldn't help it, not while he was thinking of that time only moments before.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah.. I'm alright." And this time, he was telling the truth. Of course, the memories still made him jump sometimes but it was nothing serious anymore. Not like the time when he burst into tears after someone offered him a stick of gum, only for it to shock him. That was so embarrassing...

"Alright." He kept following John until they got to the gym. As usual for the weekends, it was fairly empty, so the pair played some music as they sat in the weight room, not talking much because, frankly, they didn't have to. The few shared glances or song lyrics that they sang out loud was more than enough to know that they were both okay. Things weren't great, but it was a good start.

Once they were warmed up, they headed into the boxing ring at John's request and after his promise of not hurting Thomas. It was an interesting match up. Thomas wasn't too largely built to be fast nor was he too thin to be strong while John was thin and shorter, but strong for his size and with speed to match it.

But Thomas wasn't a boxer. John saw his moves from a mile away and it was only a few minutes before John won the match.

"Alright, you got me. As the runner up, I get to give your your prize."

John smiled and leaned up, letting Thomas give him a quick kiss. "And as the winner, I declare this day to be over. I'm ready to go home."

"So am I." Thomas smiled and followed him out, then walked back with him, getting a call from his mom as they walked. He tutted and answered. “Hello?”

"Thomas, where are you and Lucy?"

"Lucy's at a sleepover with her friends this weekend and I'm with my friends."

"Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

He rolled his eyes, knowing just what to say to get out of this. "I did."

"You did?"

"Yeah."

"Oh. Well, have fun then."

He sighed as she hung up and put his phone back in his pocket. It'd been that way for years, probably ever since Lucy was born. No, even before that. Always, maybe. It was so easy for Thomas to get away with anything when no one paid attention. It was one of the reasons he'd fallen for John so fast. He did.

When they got to the apartment, they laid on John's couch with pizza that they'd picked up on the way and put on a movie, spending the day quietly.

#hamilton #hamilton fanfic #alexander hamilton #lafayette #hercules mulligan #thomas jefferson #john laurens #john jay #james reynolds #lams #mullette #thaurens #63 #chapter 63

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imaginetonyandbucky · 7 years ago

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The next weeks Bucky and Tony met regularly and played games together, in private, off their youtube channels. It was a nice change to recording games. There was no pressure to do everything right and be funny at the same time. It was care-free and they could talk about a lot of things besides games as well. Both Tony and Bucky had outed themselves on their youtube channels and that exposed both of them to some hatred online. They talked about their experience with past boyfriends and what they had done before they had started on youtube. Tony had been an engineer before and he still was to some point. He told Bucky about his plans to start a new series testing out gadgets and tech devices, most likely involving explosions in one way or another. It all sounded very interesting.

Eventually Tony brought up the subject of doing a series together.

"I don't want you to think that I wouldn't want to do a series with you, I really do, but I don't want to pressure you into that kind of exposure because I know it's not just all hunky-dory, so I want you to make the call." Tony had said one day and Bucky really had to think about that.

He wasn't sure if he really wanted to be put on the spot and exposed to potentially 7 million viewers. Bucky was very happy with the way his little community was growing and you really needed a thick skin if you did a collab with Tony because Tony's hardcore fans rarely liked a newcomer and were not afraid to show it. He would like to see his channel grow but was it worth the risk that someone found out his secret.

His secret, that was a whole different story, because he hadn't even told Tony about his missing arm.

"I'll think about it. I like what we got going right now, Tones." Bucky didn't say that he feared their relationship would change if they started doing videos together.

"Yeah, no problem. I know my fans can be difficult."

(More after the break!)

---

It was a few weeks later when Tony was preparing to leave for PAX. The gaming convention was a regular thing for Tony and he always had large meet-ups with fans and was invited to speak on several panels for new games.

Bucky, on the other hand, had only ever seen a convention via the live feed and he didn't want to change that any time soon.

"You could come with me, you know? You could stay backstage if the exposure is not your thing, I'm sure I can get you a pass, they always give me some."

"Nah, It's too far away for my taste and too many people."

"Okay, I can understand." Tony had sounded disappointed at Bucky's refusal to come, had even offered to pay for the flight to Boston and accommodations, but Bucky had made up excuses that he couldn't come. Tony's desire to meet him had become clear to Bucky for some time now. Their friendship had evolved over the months, seeing as their relationship had started with both of them admitting they thought the other was cute there had been a certain vibe of something more since the beginning but it had become clear now. They were talking more and more outside of playing games, leaving each other messages on discord for when the other was offline.

They exchanged phone numbers at last, so far they had always been on their computers when they talked to each other, but now that Tony would be away for a while it had become necessary. Bucky hadn't thought about it much, it was just another way to message each other, but he was soon shown otherwise when Tony started to message him pictures of himself making funny faces when he was waiting backstage and bored.

"Even mining cobblestone for 5 hours wouldn't be as boring as waiting for them to set up the stage. You'd think they knew what they were doing." Tony wrote him on the day the panel with him and a few other YouTubers with a high sub count was being held. Bucky was sitting in front of his PC watching the live stream. It was currently displaying a message about technical difficulties.

"If only they'd let me help. I could figure it out." Tony wrote and Bucky could imagine the cute pout on his face.

"I'm sure you could," Bucky answered with obvious sarcasm.

"Hey, I totally could. I've got a Ph.D. in engineering."

"You what? O_O" Bucky almost dropped his phone.

"Yeah, I studied at MIT. Did I never tell you?"

"Nooooooooo! I mean... I knew you were smart but not that you were an actual genius." Bucky couldn't believe it.

"Got the paper to prove it an all. Oh, I gotta go, they finally figured it out."

That was the last message before the panel went live and Bucky could watch Tony answer questions about games and youtube. The fact that Tony was an actual genius never left him that day.

Tony sent him more and more selfies and photos of his day and Bucky had to grin at every single one of them. Tony was hilarious and extremely handsome. Of course, Bucky knew what Tony looked like but seeing Tony so carefree and private was something different and to know that these pictures were just for him. It made Bucky's heart beat a little faster and Steve occasionally caught him staring at his phone for minutes on end grinning from ear to ear.

"You're crushing so hard, Buck," Steve said one day when Bucky was lying on the couch scrolling through all the pics Tony had sent him.

"I'm not, I just like the guy, that's all," Bucky said and when Steve didn't answer with a snarky comment again Bucky looked up.

Steve was smiling at him, not that shit-eating grin when he wanted to make fun of Bucky but a fond smile that made Bucky pause for a moment.

"I'm happy for you, you know," Steve said. "After all you've been through. I'm happy that you found someone again."

Bucky had had a few relationships in the past and none of them had been particularly bad, but after he lost his arm he had never gone back to dating or meeting people in general. He had lost his confidence, didn't see himself as attractive anymore and so he had holed up in his room most of the time. It had only been a year or so ago that he had found the courage to be more open again. He had started using a webcam for his videos and had joined Steve on outings on occasion. Still, he had never thought about dating again. The thing with Tony, however, it had grown into something more than friendship without him even realizing what was happening.

It hit Bucky like a fist in the stomach. He had fallen in love.

With Tony.

He swallowed hard and buried himself deeper into his blanket. "He found me if anything..." Bucky mumbled and then gasped and dropped his phone when Steve hugged him without warning.

---

Bucky woke up at 3 am to his phone furiously beeping. It could only mean one thing.

Tony.

Already smiling Bucky reached for his phone and found that he had several messages from the other. Excitedly he opened them up and was surprised to not only find a few messages but also a rather large video file.

"Bucky"

"Bucko"

"Buckaroooooo"

"I hav to tel u somthin"

"Fuk, why is the"

"screen so fuzzy?"

Bucky chuckled. It looked like Tony had been out partying and was now drunk messaging him. He wondered what kind of shenanigans Tony got up to this time and clicked on the video.

The video was shaky and it looked like Tony was sitting in his bed, hair a complete mess and his eyes bloodshot.

"Bucky," he slurred, definitely drunk, "Buckaroo, Buckster, Sunshine. I have to tell you something." His tone was serious unlike the other drunk messages Bucky had received and a dreaded feeling came over him.

"I hope you're not mad at me. " Tony grabbed for a pillow with his free hand and hugged it to his chest. "I did something. I am drunk, as you see, but that is not the thing I did. It is /a/ thing I did but it's not /the/ thing I did." Tony shook his head and needed a moment to focus on the camera again. "I hope I don't regret this because I really like you. Like really really like you and that...that's the problem." Tony ran his hand through his hair, disheveling it even more and Bucky started to worry even more. He had a feeling Tony was going to cut off all contact between them, that Bucky was just not good enough. Tony certainly had more important things to do than hang out with Bucky late at night.

"Bucky." Tony's stern tone of voice made Bucky focus back on the video.

Tony had brought the camera close to his face and was staring right at it.

"I love you."

Bucky threw the phone across the bed like it had just bitten him. Surely he hadn't heard that right. Bucky stared into the darkness, the phone had landed screen first on the end of the bed and he could still hear Tony's muffled voice coming from it. It had to be a joke, Tony was drunk, that had to be it.

With a racing heart, Bucky crawled to the end of the bed and picked up his phone again. The video had stopped.

Slowly Bucky sat back down again, pulling the covers around himself and then played the video again and this time he kept watching after Tony had said the words.

"I said it. I said it. Yes. Bucky, I love you. I've been crushing on you so hard ever since I saw your first video and then I contacted you and then you turn out to be this amazing person and I shouldn't have fallen in love with you. You probably don't need someone like me in your life, but I couldn't stop myself. The way you smile, the way you laugh. You're such a wonderful person and you put up with me of all people when I'm such an obnoxious douchebag. I'm an arrogant asshole. If you looked up narcissistic Youtuber on urban dictionary there'd be a reference to me." Tony had worked himself up into a full-blown rant, about himself. Bucky could hardly listen let alone watch how self-deprecating Tony was behaving. It made no sense to him.

How could Tony even think that Bucky wouldn't want him?

Eventually Tony ran out of steam and he hid his face in the pillow.

"Please don't be mad at me, Bucky. " Tony mumbled, barely audible and then the video ended. Bucky sat in silence, stunned and confused. He had never dared to hope that Tony reciprocate his feelings and now Tony had been the one to confess his feelings to him and he even felt bad about it.

Bucky was still thinking about what to write Tony back to assure him that no Bucky he wasn't mad, quite the contrary when his phone rang with the call from an unknown number. Thinking it might be Tony Bucky answered without hesitation.

"Tony?" He asked hopefully.

"Sorry to disappoint you but this is Rhodey, Tony's friend. You might know me as Warmachine."

Bucky frowned, he had never talked with Rhodey before but Tony had talked plenty about his best friend. "I know who you are. Is Tony alright? Has something happened?"

"Tony's fine. He's passed out after he sent you that video, that I only got to see the end of. Live and in color. That's why I wanted to talk to you." Rhodey sounded serious and Bucky's heart sunk.

"I'm not gonna use the video to black mail him or anything."

"Didn't see you as the type to do that but I appreciate it, but that's not what I was worried about." Rhodey paused for a moment and sighed. "Could you let him down gently? When you tell him you're not interested? Make it a bit easier for him?"

"Hold on." Bucky sat up straighter. "Why would I do that?"

Another sigh on Rhodey's end. "I didn't want to go into details but Tony's had some not so nice relationships and he doesn't take it easy when he's rejected, so maybe tell him you're seeing someone else - "

"No, I mean, why would I tell him I'm not interested?" Bucky asked thoroughly confused.

Rhodey sounded as confused as Bucky felt. "Because you're not? Or.... are you?"

"I- ", Bucky was suddenly put on the spot and didn't know how to formulate his feelings. "I think I am? I don't know. I always thought he couldn't be interested in someone like me and I never thought anything would come of it." Bucky confessed, trying not to think about that he was talking to a stranger, a stranger that was Tony's best friend. But from what he knew about Rhodey from his videos and Tony's stories he seemed like a guy you could trust and so it just came spilling out of Bucky. "I'm a fucking nobody next to Tony that he even talks to me is a miracle in my eyes and I like him. I like him a lot and I didn't want to ruin our friendship because I suddenly developed feelings. And I haven't told him a few things about me. Important things that he should know before... you know."

Rhodey suddenly chuckled, a soft laugh with no malice. "You two are something. Tony told me the exact same thing, that he didn't want to ruin your friendship, yadda yadda and that you wouldn't want him if you knew about his past relationships."

"But I know about his relationships..." Bucky said.

"Yeah, he probably told you everything was fine and mutual."

"Oh," Bucky said intelligently, suddenly realizing what that meant. A long silence followed afterward before Rhodey was the first to speak.

"And what about you, what is your secret, huh?"

"I...," Bucky hesitated, was he really going to tell Rhodey what he hadn't even dared to tell Tony?

"You don't have to tell me, but just so you know, there is very little that could make Tony turn away from someone he really cares about. He's not shallow, contrary to popular belief. So whatever it is, I think you can stop worrying." Rhodey assured him

"I'm disabled." Bucky blurted out and was surprised at himself. That was probably the first time ever he had said it out loud. He heard Rhodey laugh and Bucky felt like throwing up. It had been a mistake. His thoughts were going haywire about possible consequences, he was screwed, absolutely screwed, he'd have to break off any contact-

"Hey, don't worry about that, okay?" Rhodey said and brought Bucky's racing thoughts to an abrupt stop. "I can assure you Tony's not an abelist asshole if that's what you're scared off. He knows how to deal with it."

"Okay." Bucky managed to say after taking a deep breath.

"I'm gonna go and tuck Tony into bed now, maybe you can write him a nice message so he doesn't freak out in the morning because I'm sure he will."

"Yeah, sure. I wanted to do that anyway." Bucky leaned back in bed, suddenly feeling like a weight had lifted off his shoulders that he hadn't even known he was carrying.

"And Bucky?"

"Yes?"

"You're all he ever talks about and I haven't seen him this happy in years, so...." Rhodey trailed off, leaving Bucky to figure out the rest.

"Is this the shovel talk?" Bucky grinned, Rhodey was clearly joking.

"I used to be US Airforce, just so you know," Rhodey said in all faux seriousness.

Bucky snorted. "So what, I was in the army, I can take ya."

"Treat my boy right and you don't have to." With that Rhodey hung up and Bucky fell sideways into his pillows completely exhausted, but wide awake. He spent a long time thinking about what he wanted to write back to Tony. He finally settled on a heart smiley followed by a simple: "I love you, too, Tony." And after a few minutes, he added a few more lines explaining that he had been scared to tell him too and what two fools they were by not realizing sooner.

Bucky lied awake after that, phone clutched in his hand, thinking about what that meant for them because if they were to take it to the next level Bucky would no longer be able to hide behind his PC and weasel out of meeting Tony and he didn't really want to now anyway. If Rhodey was to be believed and Bucky trusted him because Tony trusted him then there was nothing to worry about.

He spent the next hours looking up flights to California until Tony started to send him a barrage of messages with how, what, why and a bunch of question marks. Bucky suggested they take it to Discord and talk there. Tony couldn't stop asking questions, Bucky got the feeling that he wasn't quite sober yet from the way he slurred his words but he managed to convince Tony that yes, he meant what he had said. Eventually Tony started to make all sorts of adorable noises.

"So does that mean we're boyfriend and boyfriend now?" Tony cooed into the microphone for probably the 6th time in the past 20 minutes.

Bucky laughed and wiped the wetness from his eyes. "Yes, that's what it means." He explained patiently. Tony was so adorable but that he felt that it was necessary to ask over and over again that this was real and that it was really happening, made Bucky ache for him. Rhodey had hinted at it earlier and that made Bucky not only sad but also angry. He was mad at Tony's exes for installing such a fear of abandonment in him, that he couldn't believe Bucky even after assuring him over and over again.

It also made Bucky worry, that he might not be enough for Tony, that he wasn't able to give Tony what he needed and he would end up just like his previous relationships and leave Tony. It terrified him.

A knock on Bucky's door brought him out of it. Tony was hiccuping softly into his ears.

"Bucky?" Steve asked from behind the door. "Have you been up all night?"

"Who's that?" Tony slurred.

"That's my flatmate, Steve, told you he's a pain in the ass sometimes," Bucky explained.

"I heard that!" Steve yelled. "And all I'm asking is that you keep it down! I've been hearing you chitchat all night!"

"Well, excuse me. I've been talking to my boyfriend, didn't know that was a crime!" Bucky yelled back and then the door burst open.

"Boyfriend?" Steve stared at him with wide eyes. "When did that happen?"

Bucky checked the clock. "About 22 minutes ago." He said, grinning smugly.

"Tony?" Steve asked, searching Bucky's monitors for a clue and when Bucky nodded Steve tackled him in his chair with no regards to any recording equipment still attached to Bucky. They both tumbled to the floor, Steve enveloping Bucky in a bear hug and squeezed him tightly. "I am so happy for you!"

Bucky struggled to breathe under Steve's crushing weight and tried to get his arm free. He was worried that Tony might get the wrong impression. Finally, he managed to get his hand free and hit Steve in the shoulder, who finally let go. He hurried back to the computer and put his headphones back on.

"Tony, you still there?" The line seemed dead and Bucky quickly checked if the call was still connected. It was and then after listening closely, he could hear Tony softly breathing. Tony had fallen asleep.

"I hate you." Bucky punched Steve in the shoulder a few times for good measures because the guy was grinning smugly at him.

#winteriron #tony stark #bucky barnes #tony x bucky #gamer au #no powers au #long distance relationship #getting together #steve rogers #james rhodes #prompts #jamesprince

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