#two boyfriends just talking I guess
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Being a Jane liker is so hard cause you go to her tag and it’s just a bunch of people lamenting how overhated she is and then continuing to ignore her, and being a Jake liker is so hard cause you go to his tag and it’s just tons of people making the most demeaning comments about him cause his character committed the crime of being annoying (unforgivable.)
#homestuck#jake english#jane crocker#vent#?#I guess hahaha#I am in the content trenches with these two#it’s always secretly about Dirk with them#Jane is Dirk’s bestie#Jake is Dirk’s boyfriend/ex#I just want content about them being friends/siblings/cousins or whatever#or with other people like Roxy or Jade#or even just stuff on their own#but nooooo always the same guy#and even the people who talk about how this fandom focuses too much on the dudes#characterize Jane as Dirk’s bestie and nothing more#I’m considering sharing my Jane analysis if only to bring more diversity#it’s actually kinda funny though that so much of their stuff revolves around Dirk#cause in canon that bothers Jane#how easy things are for him to just do#and she literally admits to being jealous of him#and while he interprets it to be mainly about Jake it’s honestly just in general#like he just does a bunch of stuff that she wishes she had the courage to do#and honestly he’s just more of a hero#they’re kinda like an inversion of John and Dave’s dynamic mixed with Jade and Dave’s#where from Dirks perspective it’s JadeDave in the sense that he just sees Jane as his silly friend who he must protect#while from Jane’s she’s the Dave to his John in that she wants to be heroic in the way he is#and like nobody does anything with that#The fandom ever focused on the boys takes Dirk’s side and says look at her#she’s just a girl
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with all these gaston crackships/rarepairs that are coming out lately it would be so fucking funny if he had a flig with all the main characters (ambar, nina, simon... hell luna too if you want) and they all know it except matteo
#mf would feel so betrayed once he finds out#and not because he's jealous or anything - or maybe yes (they kinda have a vibe between them if you get what i mean)#mainly because his best friend didn't tell him#gaston would 100% use “you didn't ask” with a shit-eating grin while shrugging his shoulder#he would have the time of his life making fun of matteo reaction lol#and matteo would also lowkey be insecure (understandable because gaston was probably a better boyfriend for all those people [real])#[from here on i'm gonna yap but like... YAP - get ready]#type of flings/situationships/whatever i think he had:#LUNA/GASTON : [barely a fling/ a kinda relationship (?)] - them just trying it out for the hell of it#they had a lot of fun and it strengthened their friendship#they never talk about it unless they're sure that they're by themselves#gaston sometimes reminiscences about it in front of others(to make luna panic/embarass)but in such a vague enough way that they don't get i#it always comes off as them play-fighting#it either happened before he and nina got together (which is what i'm running with for this post) or they did it after she left#because they were the closest to her and were the only people that could understand what it meant to lose nina#(luna also dated her in the past by this point)#GASTON/NINA: [literally canon and one of the main ships] so i don't have to explain it i guess#GASTON/SIMON: [was a “they were all in their feelings” during those moments - kind of deal]#that scene i reposted the other day is a good way to pinpoint when they started to actually eye eachothers /put a start to what they had#it ended two or three months later - don't know who put an end to it between them#but it wasn't a problem because they both had something else they wanted to focus on more - they're extremely chill about this#GASTON/AMBAR: [kinda the same - got to know eachother when they were kids and became extremely close (even tho it took A BIT since#even if gaston came from a good family ambar was still as standoffish as now (and also a bit shy even if she wouldn't admit it)]#gaston was the one that did the first step#at that point ambar actually never stopped to think about dating in general but especially him#but the idea of losing him as a friend for something so stupid as a relationship terrified her#he reassured her that whatever happened nothing between them would've changed#which was real but also not really#they ended up breaking up a year and a half later and became a bit awkward around eachothers for a bit (mostly because of ambar)#they're still cordial with eachothers
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i really wish the worst year of my life on a personal level was not happening while i also have to be on Good Behavior for a new job with the threat of unemployment looming VERY near
#i've had two family deaths in under six months and that's after coming off a stint of unemployment and draining ALL my savings#and i KNOW my boss does NOT buy it when i tell her i've never had this much trouble meeting expectations#she straight up said she's cutting me more slack than her boyfriend would if i was reporting to him instead and like. thanks.#glad you talk about me with your boyfriend i guess. negatively too.#i'm probably going to have to pass on my uncle's interment next month because it's in the middle of the week#and i don't have the pto available to take for it#anyway. i don't know why i'm bitching. i just need to Be Better.#that's literally the only option.
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sometimes my boobs hurt so much i think they're gonna bleed surely this is normal right
#i think im pmsing.. but im not sure#like the dates aligned but also they've been super irregular hence the whole pcod etc#like im already wearing a size 38 bra because of all this fucking weight gain#and even that feels tight?? like the next size available was free size😭😭#but like it feels normal good even everyday just from the past two days it's been hurting like hell#and fucking worst festivsl of the year so i can't even stay in my room bra off all day#but oh god why do they pain so much it's never been like this before ive been having periods since i was 11 and im 21 now#maybe another pcod uhh idk side effect? symptom? whatever it's called#and i definitely have that pms wali feeling#i mean i haven't broken down yet but#you know that feeling when you WANT something but you don't know what and you try everything but nothing works#like i ate pasta i ate ice cream i studied and accomplished my targets i slept a lot i watched comfort show#i even washed my hair and danced to so many songs today morning while booping#but then it keeps crashing#and it's not enough#don't ask me what's it because even i do not know#i think i want. a hug. i guess#but from my bestfriend#because me and my sister keep fighting and i don't think she's really understanding me rn#but i think she's (bsf) avoiding talking to me because she's getting back together with her shitty boyfriend#i want to call and whine and say fuck that i don't care just talk to me but#i can't#the thought of asking for help needing people is. wow it's genuinely making me puke#i hate hate HATE being pathetic and needy#sometimes i wish#i mean obviously i would prefer it if i was perfectly healthy qnd normal and fine#but sometimes i wish someone just looked at me and said#oh honey how are you carrying so much sadness inside you and hiding it so well?? how are you even functioning???? how are you not#on the floor wailing and crying and unable to get up?#like you need [insert idk pills or whatever the cure is] BADLY
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Its like. SO surreal when you grow up "alongside" an artist- youre the same age, but they had a following bigger and better before you ever had social media to begin with, you two grow up, you follow their progress and they enjoy your support..
the clock strikes 19, and suddenly its like a ticking time bomb to see if they realized the responsability on their shoulders and that they need to grow up-their sudden power imbalance with younger friends, mutuals and fans. Do they know the damage they can cause? most of them dont.
Through a mix of self unawareness and selfishness, they hurt someone. they hurt a minor and now this person you watched develop before your very own eyes is the religated piece of shit of the week and shunned from the community.
Its even worse when thats your friend..
#i was kind of in such a situation but we spoke recently and i promised to stop talking about it. sort of. i guess i forgave them?#theres some leeway into forgiveness when the offense isnt extremely dire i suppose#what Synnibear did was..not good. and her refusal to self reflect and actually maintain her apology shows shes a bad person. theres no -#-forgiveness#and the guy i knew as a kid. they were just unaware frankly#i feel kind of violated by them but we made amends and moved on. i just kinda feel..gross for it still.#so thats kind of like. a reminder. to correct my posture and not be a freak weirdo around people in general#still a shame aint it#i can now name two artists who ive respected. followed and wanted to befriend turn out to be horrible people! wow#the other guy has a ally that im in personal kahoots with aswell#. ok i know his boyfriend is what im saying#and he says theres 'personal troubles' that the victim 'failed to mention'#i really. doubt anything can excuse talking to a 16 y.o weird when youre 18-19 bro#but am i being twofaced#i forgave Chris#but its not our place to forgive Kaz#does he realize he hurt someone for life#i was hurt for life#im still struggling with that weird shit that happened to me. theres effects im trying to hurdle over#that person probably had it way worse then i did right? imagine their struggle#how is Kaz any more superior or innocent enough to be 'forgiven' and 'permitted return'#even if somehow that kid turned around and forgave him. nobody will want him back#whats done is done. and if there was a way to 'justify' or 'explain' himself ... it doesnt matter#they dont forgive him#he hurt them#fuck this dude for real
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y’all ever so absolutely embarrassed you start crying
#That was the most humiliating apology I’ve ever had to give#I cannot believe someone in this group would behave like that#Someone my age if not a year older kicked open the door of the building that we were invited to so hard it made a cracking sound#in front of people who work there#I’m so fucking embarrassed#I had to go back in and say “I’m so so sorry that was so wrong and that’s not what we do in this group”#But like I guess it is apparently#The younger one of the people working their looked at me like I was straight trash while I apologized#I don’t even know who it was#I’ve spent the past 15 hours working as hard as I can holybshit#Two people have passed out one sprained an ankle ones pissed and exhausted#Three people got fucking wacked equipment broke my leader broke down into tears#Someone cut their finger I lost all my fucking bicep strength in front of a judge#Spent an hour comforting a sobbing mess because her ex boyfriend is an abusive dick but she’s still in love with him and still talking#To him. Which sounds just like me talking about someone I used to be with but fucking hell I wish I had someone to say that stuff to me#I’m so tired my feet are bleeding I’m humiliated and exhausted and lonely
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hate how im now at a point where im legit like kicking my legs and grinning like an idiot over fictional characters SEND HELP
#take One Guess who im talking about. YES ITS KOI BOI#hes so prettyyyyy and cute and lovely and i love looking at him i wanna hear him speak and laugh and sing just AAAAAAAAAAAA#(turns to my own brain) BITCH WE ARE MEANT TO BE AROACE WHY ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH TWO FICTIONAL CRIMINALS WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?????#my brain: (that fuckin anime girl gif from evangelion (i think??))#like fuuuuuck man is it self shipping if u use a proxy? like. hes an oc but he's a stand in for me. he is me and i am him but we also arent#he is his own person and i am my own our lives are very very different but i use him to express love for Mad Dog and Koi Boy#cause they could actually love him if i were in their world i wouldnt stand a chance but my boy has one so he loves them for me#its far easier to imagine him kissing them than it is for me to imagine myself kissing them but that might be because im wired weird#idk it *feels* like it counts yknow. my dumbass out here gettin jealous when i see a Certain Ship cause like i disagree with it on#a Fundamental Level. and on TOP of that half the time the art is so CUTE and im like 'motherfucker that should be ME' or i guess my lad but#STILL am i making sense?? doesnt help that i worry im like. misreading what content i have but also fuck you i can do what i want and also#i get him more than yall kgyugkhjhk (jk jk. Unless) basically when i call them my boyfriends i fuckin mean it#look its Real Missing Nishiki Hours i love him i wanna kiss his perfect face someone shoulda shown him love i could save him and he could#make me worse <3 I Want Him#and do not get me wrong i may be focused on him but Majima is still my wifey too!!! hes mine you cant have her <3#i just have koi boy brainrot i very much desire them Both (YES THAT MIGHT BE WHY I SHIP THEM TOO LOOK I ALSO THINK THEYD WORK WELL TOGETHER#OR AT LEAST HAVE A FUN DYNAMIC TO EXPLORE I SHOULD DATE THEM AND THEY SHOULD DATE EACH OTHER WE ALL HAVE 2 HANDS)#might delete this in the mornin who knows but im feelin silly i wanna talk about them i wanna talk about my boy but idk if ppl would really#GET IT yknow i can think of maybe Two People and that INCLUDES bestie but just aaaa point is i love my koi boy so much hes so lovely <3 <3
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my eyes have been opened to the possibility of rory x paris oh my GOD
#listen i always knew it was a ship#but now that im a Lesbian For Real i've been actually noticing and considering the wlw ships in media that i like#and oh my god the possibilities with this one!!#paris pining is all i need in my life#im obsessed#i just watched the episode where paris spreads it around school that mr medina is dating lorelai#and she comes clean to rory later that she only did it to get everyone to stop talking about her parents divorce#and rory says that if she ever wants to talk shes there#and then they have a cute little thing where paris keeps insisting that she wont want to talk and then making sure that its still an option#thats so !!!!!!#oh also i hate max medina with a passion#i didnt think he was so bad in my first five times watching the show i guess because the bar is so low for lorelai's boyfriends#but hes gross and manipulative and i hate him#thats my two cents#gilmore girls#cloudy rambles#cloudy rewatches gilmore girls
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other thing i did tonight. the whole polycule's here now
#give me vertigo#god coming up w a ship name for the whole group is TOUGH uhh#cassverowdy#I GUESS??? it's the best one so far that ive come up with#anyway quick notes i think the polycule is v-shaped w vertigo as the joint#basically it's vertigo and his two weird blond boyfriends#because why choose just one?#i probably said this already LOL but it doesnt hurt to reiterate#also rowdy is cis gay vertigo is trans gay and cass is cis bi :)#i have more thoughts but i will talk about them later in an actual post maybe
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my sister is home for christmas and I can't wait for her to leave.
#🐇#I've said before that she's not the same person anymore but like it's ridiculous#all she does is talk about her boyfriend that she's in love with. which if y'all remember when I said she was cheated on? it's that guy's#best friend. so. you can imagine. they're apparently already talking about living together#she doesn't want to do anything but go to the gym and she's just got a very like....body shaming energy about her#I mean she's literally been calling my cat fat. it sounds insane and stupid but not even the cat is safe#she keeps like....legitimately making fun of me for being autistic and mentally ill too which is fucking weird#she's saying like genuinely really mean shit and laughing hysterically and my mom is like she's just playing around!!!#so yeah.....I can't wait for this to be over. at least I get to go to the movies two days in a row I guess idk
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unpopular opinion maybe but when an idol makes fun of their group mate whether its joking or not, it's not a good look. Like I get they are probably friends and it's probably fine. But when they tease someone for being fat or ugly or the way they talk... what does that say about what they think of other people with those traits?
#I've been trying to learn a little more about an idol to write him as an ex boyfriend in a fic#originally I felt guilty making him a bad guy....#but watching him nit pick one members english and then be cocky and dismissive about another members dance skills...#I don't feel as guilty....I'm sure they are all friends and maybe the english correction thing is because he's older and just trying to hel#but just over all it's not a good look in my eyes at least#I write woosang/woosansang.... two guesses who I'm talking about lmao
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It's giving the...main character syndrome. like who tf does she think she is??? Y/N???
NO OH MY GOSH ANON. LET ME TELL YOU. LET ME FRIGGIN TELL YOU.
#okay so i need to give her a name. we will call her yn bc she is just so different and quirky and not like other girls#so i haven't liked yn since freshman year (am a junior) because she seemed incredibly pretentious. she has like awards n stuff for this#asian advocation group and tons of other stuff which is GOOD. but she has a tendency to brag and be very cocky about it.#AND YOU KNOW WHAT. IT WASNT JUST ME. MY FRIEND FROM SEMINAR who we will call Pie for certain reasons (her name rhymes with it) AGREED WITH#ME ABOUT YN BEING COCKY! and Pie and Yn are in the same group since they are both Asian and ppl at my school typically hang out w their rac#is that racist? like there's an asian boys group and asian girls group. but it's only asians and white people; but it's weird since a large#portion of my school is hispanic. i dunno WEIRD SIDE TANGENT BUT BASICALLY THEY ARE IN THE SAME GROUPS; RIGHT? so Pie was agreeing that Yn#can be very pretencious; and I'm then like#oh i don't really like her for the cheating stuff she did with Mac (fake name) and how she got#him to basically cheat on his girlfriend“ and Pie says ”oh well Mac started it; but Yn lead him on for over a month while he had a gf#and they kept this going until Yn decided to break things off; WHICH MEANS MAC'S NOW EX GIRLFRIEND NEVER KNEW ABOUT ANYTHING W MAC N YN!#also allegedly according to my boyfriend; Yn was doing homework as Mac was yk DOING it to Yn and she just like... LET IT HAPPEN WHILE HE HA#A GIRLFRIEND. HELLO? and when Yn ends it; he's like “omg but yn... i love you...” “no. i'll only hurt you; if you're with me it'll only hur#uh okay 25k words slowburn vibes.... ANYWAYS so she takes screenshots and sends them in a SUPER big groupchat with 20+ people (including Pi#and my boyfriend) and Pie (who was childhood friends with Mac) called her out saying how it was also kind of her fault for being with a guy#who was in a relationship; but she got super defensive about it. and this same thing happened AGAIN 2ish months later with a girl Jas and#her boyfriend Ben; where Yn was friends with both but basically was emotionally cheating with Jas; leading them to break up; and then she#GOT WITH JAS. HELLO???? WHAT??? and they r still together. none of them talk to Ben even though Yn said they were 'all cool and friends'#SUREEEE GIRL SURE. KEEP TELLING YOURSELF THAT. and Pie called her out on this AGAIN since Pie is friends with Ben and Jas too but Yn got#defensive AGAIN! BC SHE KNOWS ITS A SHITTY THING TO DO! and Pie doesn't really like her because of it and when Pie told me all of that I wa#in shock. because Yn was trying to play the victim in the situation with Mac when she sent the messages to the gc; and tried to do that AGA#N BUT IN THE SITUATION WITH JAS LIKE NO U ARE JUST A CRAPPY PERSON ! and appearently she is SO toxic she was nearly kicked out from a#leadership role at my school's asian pacific islander club or something! like girl WAKE UP! but that's not all; so i didn't know she was#known for going for people who had partners; yet still didn't like her; and last school year (about 4 months ago) my boyfriend got a 'reall#bad haircut' (i thought it was cute; but everyone made fun of him ) and Yn RAN around our campus trying to find him to make fun of him..#like wtf that's so weird and she will post screenshots of their convos on her story and be like 'omg he's bullying me!' when he's being dry#and did that in the gc (this time; i'm in it!) and i crashed out but my bf was apologizing and saying he told her to not post anything but#she didn't listen or something i guess. and sometimes when they are wearing similar outfits she'll post on her story that they are matching#um girl he has a wife and 12 kids. back the FUCK off. and i told him to distance himself from her or set boundries cuz i don't like that n#it makes me uncomfy; so he did which is good! but i still don't like Yn. she is a major pick-me IMO and very two-faced and covers her
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just
#There's just this horrible crushing feeling in my chest and it's not that I think Johnny hates Moz or anything#It's not that#I can on some level understand why Johnny's immediate reaction would be no#Andy is gone#Moz refused to join him in 2008#There's been so much before this moment#On Johnny's end#And I get like#Why Johnny be like I just can't do it#I really do#That's so much emotional turmoil to survive#And to have begged for years#Only for Moz to just now say well okay I guess let's make amends#It must have been an incredibly hard thing#I'm not even sure what to feel about Moz' agreement#I sort of thought in my mind Moz would have rather dunked his face into a bucket of hungry piranhas before sharing a stage with Johnny agai#He has just been so distant in public#I know that doesn't mean anything about what they do privately#Moz guards his personal life to an extreme extent#He's never even talked about Damon as his boyfriend#Or had a proper picture taken with him#But Moz saying yes#I don't know how to feel#On one hand it amazes Moz wrote that whole pissy open letter last year#Then is like Johnny come back#It's not the first time though is it#I just can't#Moz feeling so hurt when Johnny wouldn't stand up for him in court#Or appeal the decision#Then after two decades to be able to say Johnny I want to be with you again
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.
#tag talk#we're lowkey making huge progress between us! I'm trying to allow space for Lear to speak even when I'm running the show#I'm a little overbearing I guess. hard to even think about him when I'm in control#but we managed to have a bit of a conversation!!! which honestly might be the best we've ever done in terms of dialogue#usually it's vague thoughts back and forth and then radio silence between us until the slight shift as we switch places#we need to get better at communicating because sharing a partner means we need to communicate about stuff#and sure. neither of us are good at sharing our emotional needs but we can get better it just takes practice#anyway this is cool and I love my boyfriend and I love my headmate a lot he's been through a lot with me#communicating is so important and I'm glad we made it happen.#I keep saying I and then changing to we because I need to not take all the credit for the progress we've made. he deserves some credit too.#but yeah. huge progress. learning to accept my duality and talk about it openly and learn to communicate between the two halves#instead of shutting myself away in a closet somewhere I wanna learn to be open about who I am.#I learned to do that with being gay. I learned to do that last year with being trans. and I'm hopefully learning to do that with plurality#one of these days I'll run out of personal problems to solve. but at least I have a clear goal for personal growth this year now.#here I thought if I could figure out being trans I wouldn't have any more issues to work on. hahaha I was so wrong hhhhhhhh#anyway bye I'm gonna get up and cook some fish and broccoli and rice for breakfast
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let me b-a-n-g baby
rafe cameron x fem!virgin reader
summary: “she told you she celibate, but she told me i can nail her shit” - nle choppa
warnings: smut, loss of virginity, dirty talk, reader seems sweet and innocent but is secretly dirty, dom!rafe, sub!reader, oral (m + f receiving), unprotected piv sex, a spank, creampie, slight breeding kink, daddy kink, cheating, reader has a boyfriend that is not rafe, degrading, praise, cursing, celibacy but not specified why
obv this is based on gang baby by nle choppa
God, you drove Rafe fucking crazy.
Wearing those skirts that were normal length around your family, but hiked up to barely cover your ass around him.
Whenever Rafe would see you with your boyfriend, you always seemed so uninterested, giving him looks with your pretty eyes.
He just wanted you so bad.
You currently stood in Rafe’s living room as he threw a party, one of his lavish ones that everyone in Figure 8 knew about.
Sipping on whatever little drink was handed to you at the beginning of the party, your boyfriend, Miles, spewed on and on and on about some side project at work.
“Good job, baby.” You hummed, not paying attention, eyes locked on Rafe’s icy blue ones.
Rafe was smirking at you, drinking a glass of scotch on the rocks as he noticed you not even paying your poor boyfriend any ounce of attention.
“Y/n.”
You snapped your gaze back over to Miles.
“Hm?” you hummed.
“I think I’m gonna head back home, you coming?” Miles asked sweetly.
Miles was genuinely an okay-ish boyfriend. He obviously cared, the two of you had been together for three months.
But when you first got with him and told him you were waiting til marriage, it set some kind of tension in the relationship.
“No, I’m gonna stay. I’ll get a ride home, though. promise.”
You felt Miles give your kiss a soft cheek, patting your knee as he stood up to leave.
As soon as he was gone, a familiar voice loomed over you. “not desperate to leave with your boyfriend?”
You glanced up, making eye contact with Rafe as he towered over your sitting position. You swallowed, licking your lips.
“The party isn’t over yet, is it?”
Rafe smirked at your response, taking the last sip of his scotch as he moved to sit in the seat that was previously occupied by Miles.
You had spoken to Rafe multiple times before, always seeing him at events.
“You’re not wearing your little skirt?” Rafe hummed, his eyes trailing your form.
You crossed one leg over the other, heart pounding at his intimidating gaze.
“Decided on wearing some jeans… ‘s too cold at night for a skirt.”
Rafe didn’t respond, not bothering to hide the fact he was blatantly checking you out. But he always did that.
“You don’t seem very into your boyfriend.”
Your eyes widened as he randomly called you out. Face feeling warm, you broke eye contact with him.
“I don’t think he’s very into me,” you murmured back, feeling suddenly shy.
“Yeah? How come?”
Rafe leaned closer, his large, veiny hand coming to rest on your knee. Goosebumps erupted on your skin from the contact, and you were grateful you decided to wear jeans to cover them.
“Told him I’m celibate on our third date… been a little awkward ever since,” you admit softly.
Rafe was shocked, but he masked it well. His eyes widened a little at your confession, those soft wrinkles tightening a little on his forehead.
“You practice celibacy?” Rafe hums, his thumb running along your knee still. No way this girl who hikes her damn skirts up so much to show him her ass was celibate.
“I try to, yeah.”
“Try to?” Rafe questioned, a small smirk curling on his lips.
“Guess it depends on how horny the person makes me,” you blurt out, feeling your face immensely warm from your admission and the cocky grin Rafe gave you, you sank back into your seat.
“Oh, pretty girl. You tellin’ me your boyfriend doesn’t get you all worked up? Doesn’t know how to make you all needy?” Rafe cooed.
Oh god.
His voice was enough to send shivers down your spine and a throb in your clit.
Rafe took your lack of response as something good, his self-assured smirk still plastered on his sexy face.
“I… uh… don’t really know how to answer that,” you murmur shyly.
“Mhm. How about I take you somewhere more private? Can’t hear your sweet voice surrounded by all these people,” he suggests.
You knew it wasn’t a good idea, no way in hell was following Rafe Cameron to a private bedroom ever a good idea.
He currently had your plush thighs over his shoulders, fingers digging into the sheets, noises escaping your mouth as he ate your cunt as if he was starving.
His eyes were locked onto your face, watching how with every delicious swirl of his tongue against your clit, it contorted up in pleasure.
“That feel good, pretty girl?”
All you could do was mumble something incoherent, the pleasure completely new and overwhelming to you.
Miles hadn’t offered to eat you out, despite you sucking his dick once. You were fine doing other sexual things, just not penetration, as that was what you wanted to wait for.
But when Rafe’s long fingers slid into your soaked hole, the idea of penetration was driving you insane.
“Clenchin’ around my fingers so much… never had someone pleasure this sweet pussy?” Rafe murmurs, sucking on your clit.
“no… fuck, Rafe,” you gasped.
Rafe had that stupid cocky smirk on his face as he purposely hummed around your clit, the vibration making your body twitch.
“I can tell, baby. So turned on but still so tight… you gonna let daddy put his dick in here?”
Your brain was so fuzzy, the coil in your stomach tightening as the pleasure started to get overwhelmingly good.
Rafe just chuckled against your cunt, watching as you came undone on his mouth and fingers.
Panting for breath, you were out of it for a good minute. No one else had ever made you orgasm, only used to your own fingers or a vibrator every now and then.
The tall man pulled away from your cunt, unbuckling his belt and tugging down his pants and boxer briefs.
“Taste so good, baby.” Rafe leaned forward, connecting his lips to yours in an attempt to pull you back down to earth.
“Mhmm, Ray…”
“Yeah? What do you need?” Rafe smirks.
You lifted your head, finally looking at his dick. Eyes widening a little, mouth growing a little damper with drool.
He was big and thick. A pretty mushroom tip that was leaking precum, two prominent veins that ran along the whole shaft.
“Can I suck your dick?” you mumbled.
“What was that? Speak up, pretty girl. Tell Daddy what you want.”
Of course, Rafe heard you, he was just an asshole.
“Can I suck your dick, daddy? Please?” you asked a little louder, staring up at him with your pretty eyes.
“Good girl, askin’ so sweetly for daddy. You gonna let me fuck this mouth?” He placed a large hand on the side of your head, guiding you over to the side of the bed.
You lay on your stomach in front of him, eyes still locked onto the leaking tip.
“Open your mouth.”
Wasting no time, your mouth dropped open, a small lick being delivered to swipe off his arousal.
The little noise he breathed was enough to give you more encouragement, slowly wrapping your lips around the head.
“Relax that throat f’me… good girl.”
He slowly guided your head down more of his base, tears pricking your eyes. he was bigger and thicker than Miles, again, giving you a whole new experience.
He threw his head back slightly, a soft moan leaving him. You took your hand up, starting to stroke whatever couldn’t fit.
His hold on your head never released, but he stopped guiding you. As badly as he wanted to just hold your head still so he can ram his cock in and out of your mouth, he knew he had to be patient, as you were a virgin.
“Mhm, yeah. Suck that cock, pretty girl. You’re so fuckin’ naughty, huh? Lettin’ daddy eat your sweet pussy and now you’re suckin’ his dick. What would your boyfriend say?”
You would never admit this, but his words were spurring you on. Just the idea of being in Rafe’s room, having only talked to him a few times, both of you doing oral on each other, while your boyfriend sat at home.
Obviously, you couldn’t respond. Not when he was beginning to buck his greedy, sculpted hips into your mouth, making you choke on his dick.
You bobbed your head, eagerly trying to please him as your manicured hand stroked the bottom of his shaft.
"Fuck, where'd you learn to suck dick, hm? You secretly a slut?"
Rafe leaned over onto the bed, delivering a harsh slap to your ass. His forward motion caused his cock to slide deeper into your tight throat, his balls tensing.
He was going to cum sooner than he wanted to, but he slowly stopped caring. Not when a pretty girl like you was sucking him off so desperately.
"You gonna swallow my load? Drink it all down like a good fuckin' whore?" He grunted, his hand starting to guide you again.
Spit was dribbling down your chin, small gags leaving your dirty mouth as he choked you on his member.
You took your left hand and began to gently massage his balls, feeling the way they tensed up, signaling he was close.
He twitched in your mouth, sexy, deep grunts leaving his filthy mouth.
"Shit, take my cum."
Hot spurts of semen slid down your throat, the sensation and taste of it weird, but not disgusting. You swallowed it down like a shot, gasping and panting for air when he finally released your head from his crotch.
"You look like a cheap whore, spit and cum dripping down your chin. But you love it, huh? Bet that little cunt is just throbbin', desperate for this cock."
A small whimper escaped your mouth involuntarily. He was right, and you hated it.
"Want daddy to take that sweet virginity?" He cooed, watching as you laid on your back and spread your thighs, showing him your leaking cunt.
A guilty shiver ran down your blood, the idea of Rafe Cameron, someone who you had barely any romantic involvement with, taking your virginity instead of your boyfriend or future husband.
But the way his throbbing cock was staring at you, hovering over your aching clit, the idea of just saying fuck it was stronger.
"Ray?"
"What, baby?"
"Can you... nail my pussy? Fuck me hard?" You asked softly, staring up at him with those fucking eyes that drove him insane.
"Yeah? You want daddy to break this cunt in? What about your boyfriend?" He snickered, loving how needy you looked for him.
"He can't please me like you can, please, daddy. Want you to take my virginity, don't wanna wait til marriage." You were pleading pathetically.
His smirk was downright evil as he slowly slid his leaking tip up and down your drenched lips, making sure to tease your clit nice and slow.
"You're not as sweet and innocent as you make it out to be, hm? You're just a desperate cock-whore for daddy."
Another small whine escaped your lips at his degradation, clit throbbing with need.
"Please... need you s'bad."
He leaned down to gently capture your lips in his, although it slowly became more rough as he dominated your tongue and mouth.
He began to gently slide the tip into your leaking hole, the sensation making you gasp into his mouth.
"Relax f'me, yeah?" He murmured, sucking hickeys onto your throat as he began to slide further in.
Desperate fingers dug into his muscular back, eyes squeezed shut as he stretched you out. Luckily, you were soaked, so it was easy for him.
"Feel so good, stretchin' you out on my cock. You're not celibate, huh? Just wanted to wait for daddy."
A soft moan left your throat, feeling him suddenly stop moving. Your chest rose and fell as you gasped for breath, trying to relax enough to make it feel good for yourself and him.
"Rafe, fuck..."
"I know, sweet girl. 'm fully in, just loosen up f'me so I can show this little pussy what 's been missing," he cooed.
It took a few moments, but you finally felt him start to push his hips in and out. Your painted toes curled as he continued to press kisses to your neck, getting sloppy the quicker his sculpted body moved.
"Takin' this dick so well, this pussy was made f'me, yeah?"
You nodded your head, brain fuzzy from the sensation and his naughty words. Rafe fucking Cameron was taking your virginity, inflating his already high ego.
He brought a calloused thumb down to rub your hardened clit, your legs tightening around him at the added pleasure.
"That's it... let daddy claim this needy cunt. Your boyfriend is gonna be so mad, huh? Knowing you're Rafe Cameron's bitch now."
Your walls fluttered around him at his words, a low groan leaving his lips.
"feels so good, daddy," you whined.
He just hummed, his skilled hips rolling roughly into yours, the added pleasure of his thumb on your clit was only driving you closer to the edge of release.
"You gonna cum f'me? You gonna cum on daddy's dick while he takes your slutty virginity?"
"Yes, yes -- shit."
Your orgasm hit you hard, your body shaking as the coil in your tummy snapped. Eyes squeezed shut, walls clenching around his twitching shaft.
"Good girl, good girl. You want daddy to cum in this needy cunt? Give you a baby to remember your first time?"
An embarrassing sound escaped you, head nodding quickly. If you were able to think rationally, you would have said fuck no.
But his body was so warm, his grip was so tight, his thrusts were so rough yet deep, you just begged.
"Please, Ray? Please fuck a baby into me?"
He grunted at your pleading, voice so sweet, how could he refuse?
His hips snapped quickly against yours, grunts and filthy words being poured out from his mouth as he chased his release.
Finally, you felt him twitching, and the new sensation of his cum coating your vaginal walls instead of your throat made you whimper.
"Fuck..." he gasped.
All you could do was pull him down into another sloppy, breathy kiss. Lips smashed together, tongues brushing and fighting.
He rolled over onto his back when he disconnected your swollen lips from his, a big, calloused hand caressing your hip.
"How was that?" He asked softly, a tone you had never heard from him before.
"Really good," you nodded, still out of breath.
He hummed, letting you rest for a moment.
"C'mere, pretty girl."
He guided you onto his lap, still caressing your hip with one hand, the other going to grope your left boob.
"Daddy's gonna teach you how to ride dick now."
Your eyes widened slightly, knowing you were in for a long night.
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pondering my orb
#personal#it appears i have fallen victim to the situationship industrial complex#this little arrangement i found myself in has escalated from ‘friends who hook up’ to ‘boyfriend without the boy’#and it is becoming lets say emotionally distressing#because i am leaving town for the summer in just three short weeks! and for the past two months we have spent every free moment together#and putting our own individual codependent tendencies aside i really do like him#i havent been alone long enough to shift my brain out of girlfriend mode#because the thing is i loved being a girlfriend#apparently it was a significant part of my identity#which i didnt really realize until i wasnt one anymore#and i miss it!#i dont even miss the boyfriend i was the girlfriend of particularly#i just miss being a girlfriend i think#and now i have found a man who i would very much like to be the girlfriend of#hes respectful and emotionally intelligent and he fucks me so good and we have a lot of fun together i think#but the thing is is that i cant be a girlfriend again#because since it was such a significant part of my identity now that i am no longer a girlfriend i have lost that piece#and i guess i dont know what is supposed to go in its place#who am i if not girlfriend? what do i do when i am not girlfriending? who do i talk to when its not my boyfriend?#my life purpose is certainly not ‘girlfriend’#i mean its not supposed to be. i was pretty happy with it but everyone in my life is telling me thats not what im supposed to do#so what am i supposed to do???? i dont like being alone i dont want to be#i want to be girlfriend!!!!!!!#i was happy and i felt fulfilled#sure it was for the wrong person but the right one will come along#im not very good at the whole casual dating thing though. i mean clearly#because this man is probably not boyfriend material either#as much as i like him it is questionable whether he deserves my girlfriending#so how does one find ‘the’ boyfriend?#is it a futile exercise in the first place
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