#twitter gives me clout

[so-many-fantastic-colours-3]

I feel like my drawing of a slay transmasc Jesus is an appropriate addition to this

✅ tortured by Voices

✅ cursed by god

✅ small waist

✅ criminal record

✅ died once

Diagnosis: babygirl

[maplesyrupsainz]

˖⁺｡˚⋆˙no comment | LN4˖⁺｡˚⋆˙

pairing: lando norris x fem reader y/n (she/her)

genre: social media au

warnings: none just fluff!

summary: in which she finally gives him a chance, or in which he is sunshine and she is midnight rain 🌧️

a/n: LOVEEE THISSSS lowkey

request!!!: Lando with a girlfriend who plays very hard to get and Lando is down bad for her and will quiye literally do anything just to take her out?????

fc: beabadoobee

my masterlist

instagram ->

alex_albon

liked by lilymhe, landonorris, and 698,622 others

alex_albon an old friend and her cats

tagged: lilymhe, yourusername

view all 4,927 comments

user1 omg so cute who is she

user2 alex's childhood friend !!!

user3 y/n cameo!!! it's been ages

lilymhe i love miso and kimchi so much

yourusername THEY LOVE YOU

alex_albon im cuter than the cats

yourusername in your dreams perhaps

lilymhe im not saying anything...

user4 lily and alex cutest couple ever

user5 FAV WAG

messages ->

txts between alex & lando !!!

instagram ->

yourusername

liked by lilymhe, landonorris, and 18,163 others

yourusername life 🍸

tagged: yourbff, friend1, lilymhe

view all 1,863 comments

lilymhe beaut girl

yourusername ily

friend1 drinks again soon

yourusername you alr kneowwww!!!

user6 lando norris in her likes?

user7 peep lando

yourbff omg hot hot hot hottttttt

yourusername oh stop it u

lilymhe posted a story

liked by landonorris, yourusername, and 97,173 others

user8 widdol miso 🥺

alex_albon miss you

lilymhe shush it's been 2 hrs

user9 she's so cute

messages ->

txts between lily & lando !!!

txts between lando & you !!!

instagram ->

yourusername

liked by yourbff, landonorris, and 26,863 others

yourusername cute weekend 🎀

tagged: yourbff, friend1

view all 1,075 comments

friend1 ilysm

yourusername ilyyyy

lilymhe miss u

yourusername imy i'll see u at silverstone :))

alex_albon UR COMING??

yourusername yes u literally begged me i dont have a choice....

lilymhe YEY

user10 AWW cutest friendship ever

user11 can't wait to see her in the paddock wtf

messages ->

txts between max (fewtrell) & lando !!!

txts between lando & you !!!

instagram ->

landonorris posted a story

liked by lilymhe, maxfewtrell, and 315,782 others

alex_albon what the hell

landonorris heyy alex

alex_albon I SAID NO

landonorris 🥺

alex_albon get a job stay away from her

user12 who is she

user13 OMG Y/N?!!!

maxfewtrell down bad

twitter ->

instagram ->

yourusername posted a story

liked by landonorris, alex_albon, and 44,927 others

alex_albon 😍

liked by yourusername

landonorris you're at silverstone?

yourusername yupp

landonorris wouldn't be opposed to a visit from u

yourusername really? which garage is it

landonorris ...mclaren

yourusername ohh right yea my bad

user20 SO CUTEEEE

user21 OMG y/n & lily hanging out at silverstone so cute

landonorris posted a story

liked by yourusername, lilymhe, and 274,826 others

lilymhe awww you love her

maxfewtrell can't even tell if she likes you or not

landonorris the mixed signals are mixed signalling

maxfewtrell nah she's playing hard to get

landonorris don't say that it fuels my delusions

user22 ONG THIS IS REALLY CUTE

user23 ARE U DATING HER

yourusername wow im gonna get so many followers now

landonorris are you using me for clout?

yourusername jury still out

lilymhe 📍 silverstone

liked by landonorris, yourusername, and 318,636 others

lilymhe i won't tell you my favourite part of the weekend

tagged: alex_albon, yourusername, landonorris

view all 5,183 comments

yourusername why? was it me?

alex_albon obviously not

lilymhe 🤫

user24 they have double date potential tbh

liked by landonorris

user25 lando liking this omg he's down astronomically bad

user26 new fav fourple jus droppedddd

user27 all i wanna know is if lando is dating y/n

alex_albon same

landonorris same

user28 HAHAA WHAT

landonorris 📍 silverstone

likes by georgerussell63, maxfewtrell, and 792,513 others

landonorris p4 at the home race can't complain

tagged: alex_albon, georgerussell63, yourusername, oscarpiastri

view all 8,263 comments

user29 AHHH ILY LANDO

user30 omg y/n grid post

user31 THE RED PANDA

user32 omg??? y/n's red panda??????

yourusername omg my baby!!!

landonorris she misses u

yourusername return her to me this instant

landonorris ok fine. wuu2 tonight then?

yourusername im free at 7.

user33 I KNOW THEY AINT TALKING ABOUT THAT JELLYCAT

user34 omg lando got rizz???

user35 lando is so down bad it's insane

messages ->

txts between alex lily & you !!!

instagram ->

yourusername

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 172,466 others

yourusername she's a red panda and her name is rosie 🎋 and that's just some guy

tagged: landonorris, alex_albon

view all 6,162 comments

user36 OMG ROSIE RED PANDA

user37 OMG??? y/n finally acknowledging lando?

user38 omg such a cute carousel

lilymhe sooo playing hard to get worked out?

yourusername 🤫

user39 AWWW STOPPP

user40 her finally giving up her cool act to be cutesie with lando 🥺

alex_albon some guy sounds about right

landonorris she's actually on about you

alex_albon sure 🙄

yourusername no comment

user41 ARE THEY DATING

landonorris helllll yeaaaahhhhhhh

yourusername no comment!!! (yes)

user42 SCREAM at their two personalities

THE END 🧡

[pucksandpower]

So Good to Her

Charles Leclerc x Reader

Summary: the public reacts to the TikTok challenge you and Charles inadvertently participated in

Read So Good to Me (about the TikTok challenge) here

The TikTok that the British influencer posted of his encounter with you and your incredibly generous boyfriend quickly goes viral, racking up millions of views, likes, and comments within mere hours.

It spreads like wildfire across social media platforms, with people sharing it on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook — even LinkedIn of all places. Everyone marvels at this mystery woman with the boyfriend of all boyfriends who casually sent her €10,000 just to buy a pair of shoes.

In a cozy London flat, a group of university students and diehard Charles fans gather around a laptop, eyes wide as they watch the now-viral video for the umpteenth time.

“I can’t believe Charles has a secret girlfriend!” Megan, a petite blonde wearing a red Ferrari cap, exclaims. “How did we not know about this? We follow his every move!”

Her best friend Ethan nods in agreement, his brow furrowed. “Seriously, who is this girl? She’s drop dead gorgeous and apparently Charles is just casually sending her 10 grand for shopping sprees?”

“Okay but like, goals though,” Lexi chimes in dreamily, clutching a Charles Leclerc poster to her chest. “Imagine having a boyfriend who’s not only mega hot and talented but also spoils you rotten. She’s living the dream.”

Ethan scoffs and rolls his eyes. “Oh come on, he can’t just throw money around like that. I bet this whole thing was staged for clout.”

Megan shoots him a withering glare. “Don’t be ridiculous. What would be the point? Charles is already one of the most popular drivers on the grid, he doesn’t need to pull PR stunts for attention.”

“Plus did you see the way he talked to her on the phone?” Lexi points out, rewinding the video. “That was not acting, that was real love and affection in his voice. I’m so soft for them already, ugh.”

The trio falls silent as they watch the clip again, zeroing in on every little detail and facial expression from both Charles’ mystery girlfriend and the clearly shocked TikToker.

Ethan chuckles and shakes his head. “I still can’t get over her reaction though. Just a guy who loves driving fast cars — I mean, the cheek! She really knows how to keep a secret, gotta give her that.”

“An icon, honestly,” Megan declares. “The fact that she told him to donate the money to an animal shelter too ... okay, I can’t even be mad. She seems like a sweet person.”

Lexi sighs happily, starry-eyed. “They’re literally a power couple. The sheer confidence and BDE of it all. I’m so jealous but also like, rooting for them? We have to find out who this girl is!”

As if on cue, Megan’s phone pings with a Twitter notification. Her eyes widen as she swipes to view it. “Guys. GUYS. The TikToker just confirmed her first name is Y/N and posted another video with a few more details about her!”

“Well don’t just sit there, play it!” Ethan demands, practically launching himself across the couch to peer over Megan’s shoulder at her phone screen. Lexi scrambles to join them, bouncing with anticipation.

In the new clip, the TikToker is grinning excitedly at the camera, an extra bounce in his step as he walks along the same Monaco street where he first approached you.

“Right, so I’m sure by now you’ve all seen my video with Charles Leclerc’s girlfriend go absolutely mental viral,” he begins, running a hand through his artfully tousled hair. “Which, can I just say — thank you so much for the insane support and love, you lot are the best fans ever.”

“Get to the point,” Ethan mutters under his breath, earning a sharp “Shh!” from both girls.

“Anyway,” the TikToker continues. “After she left and I finally picked my jaw up off the floor, I did some digging. I headed to that little boutique she mentioned in the call with Charles, just to see if she actually went in and bought anything. Thought maybe if I asked the staff, they might be able to give me some more info, you know?”

Megan, Ethan, and Lexi all subconsciously lean closer to the small phone screen, hanging on to his every word.

“So get this — not only did she buy the shoes, she apparently also went next door and purchased, and I quote, a frankly alarming amount of lingerie. The cashier said she dropped over 5 grand like it was nothing!”

Lexi lets out a scandalized gasp as Ethan chokes on his sip of Red Bull. Megan just shakes her head in wonderment. “The actual legend,” she murmurs reverently.

The TikToker laughs and waggles his eyebrows suggestively at the camera. “I don’t know about you lot, but I’m definitely sensing some spicy thank you for the shopping money activities were planned for a certain Ferrari driver, if you know what I mean. Get in there, Charles!”

“Gross, I so did not need that visual,” Ethan grumbles, but there’s a slight smirk playing on his lips all the same.

“Oh shut up, as if you wouldn’t do the exact same if you were dating Charles,” Lexi retorts with a playful shove to his shoulder.

“ANYWAY,” the TikToker presses on, “I did manage to squeeze a few more details out of the lovely shop girl. Apparently Charles’ girlfriend is named Y/N, no last name given for privacy reasons. But she’s a regular customer and, I quote, an absolute sweetheart who only ever has glowing things to say about her man. So there you have it, folks — Y/N and Charles are the real deal and we’re all just peasants watching a fairytale unfold.”

Megan sighs dreamily as the video ends. “Y/N and Charles,” she repeats to herself, already typing the names into her social media search bars. “God, even their names sound good together. I have to find out everything about her.”

“Dibs on making their ship name hashtag go viral,” Lexi calls out, already furiously typing away on her own phone.

Ethan snorts and rolls his eyes affectionately at his friends, but there’s no denying the small, reluctantly impressed smile tugging at the corners of his mouth too. “I give it two days before they’re papped together on some glamorous date night now that the secret’s out. Hope she’s ready for the attention dating an F1 star brings.”

“With that level of confidence and the way Charles clearly adores her? I think our girl Y/N will handle the spotlight just fine,” Megan says confidently.

Lexi nods in firm agreement. “Yep, a true queen. Charles better lock that down and wife her up real quick before one of us tries to snatch her for ourselves!”

***

In a cozy apartment not far from the very street where you had your memorable encounter with the TikToker, three young women huddle around a laptop screen, eyes wide and jaws slack as they watch the now viral video for the umpteenth time.

“I can’t believe this,” mutters Isabelle, a pretty brunette with an impressively encyclopedic knowledge of Formula 1 stats. “Charles has a girlfriend? Since when?”

“And he just sent her €10,000 like it was nothing!” Exclaims Maia, nervously twirling a strand of her platinum blonde hair. “I mean, I know he’s loaded but holy shit, the way he spoils her ...”

The third girl, Claire, bites her lip, a pensive look on her delicate features. “Did you hear what she said at the end though? Just a guy who loves driving fast cars. She was obviously talking about Charles. But the way she said it, all mysterious and like it was some inside joke ... I don’t know, it just rubs me the wrong way.”

Isabelle scoffs and rolls her eyes. “Please, she was totally gloating. Didn’t even have the decency to act a little humble about the fact that THE Charles Leclerc is apparently head over heels for her.”

“Exactly!” Maia chimes in, nodding vigorously. “Like okay, congrats, you bagged a hot, rich, famous race car driver. No need to rub it in the rest of our faces.”

Claire wrinkles her nose. “I just don’t get the vibe that she actually cares about him, you know? I mean, who asks their boyfriend to send them money in the middle of the day for some stupid shoes? While he’s working? She seems like such a gold digger.”

“Ugh, you’re so right,” Isabelle agrees, her lips curling in distaste. “Poor Charles is probably blind to it because he’s so gone for her. He didn’t even hesitate to transfer that money!”

Maia sighs dramatically and falls back on the bed. “God, it’s so unfair. Why can’t I find a man who’s that generous and totally obsessed with me? I’d treat him so much better than she does, you can already tell.”

Claire hums and taps her chin thoughtfully. “You know what, I think this smells fishy. How do we even know she’s actually Charles’ girlfriend? For all we know, she could have paid some guy who sounds like him to play along for a TikTok clout.”

Isabelle’s eyes narrow as she considers this possibility. “That’s true ... I haven’t come across any photos of them together or anything. Why has no one ever seen her before if they’re supposedly so in love?”

“Exactly!” Claire exclaims, growing more animated. “I’ve been a Charles fan for years and I’ve never seen or heard anything about a girlfriend. If they’re really dating, there’s no way it wouldn’t have come out before now.”

Maia sits up, suddenly energized by this new conspiracy theory. “Oh my god, you’re right! She’s probably just some wannabe influencer trying to get famous by pretending to be with Charles. That’s so pathetic.”

Isabelle nods slowly, a determined glint in her eye. “You know what? We should do some digging. Try to find out who this girl really is and expose her for the fraud she clearly is. Charles and the world deserve to know the truth.”

��Yesss, I’m so down for an investigation!” Maia says gleefully. “Imagine if we’re the ones who reveal that this whole thing is fake. We’d be doing Charles a huge favor.”

Claire is already pulling up Instagram and Twitter on her phone. “Let’s start by going through the comments on that TikTok and seeing if anyone has identified her or posted any receipts. There have to be some clues somewhere.”

The girls spend the next few hours poring over social media, searching for any scrap of information they can find about the mystery woman who has supposedly captured Charles Leclerc’s heart. They work themselves into a frenzy, convincing each other more and more that you can’t possibly be Charles’ real girlfriend. In their minds, you’re clearly just an opportunistic clout chaser looking for your 15 minutes of fame.

“God, I hope Charles sees through her act soon,” Isabelle says for the hundredth time, shaking her head. “He’s too good for some two-bit gold digger who’s just using him.”

“We’ll make sure he finds out who she really is,” Claire assures her firmly. “And then he’ll have no choice but to dump her lying ass.”

Maia sighs wistfully, hugging a throw pillow to her chest. “Do you think once he’s single again, I might actually have a chance? Like, if I run into him at a race one day and strike up a conversation, maybe he’ll realize I’m the girl he’s meant to be with ...”

“Okay, let’s not get ahead of ourselves,” Claire says with a laugh. “First step is taking down this fraud of a girlfriend. Then we can daydream about being Mrs. Leclerc.”

The girls giggle and go back to their social media sleuthing with renewed determination. They’ve decided you’re public enemy number one and they won’t rest until they’ve exposed you for the fake, money-hungry, clout-chasing liar they’re certain you must be. In their eyes, they’re crusaders for truth, fighting to save their beloved Charles from your clutches.

What they don’t realize, of course, is just how very real and very deep Charles’ feelings for you actually are ... and that you’re not going anywhere anytime soon, Internet conspiracy theories be damned.

***

In a dimly lit basement somewhere in Italy, a group of die-hard Charles Leclerc fans huddle around a computer screen, their jaws dropping as they watch the video for the umpteenth time.

“Guys, are you seeing this shit?” Enzo, the self-appointed leader of the group, asks incredulously. “Who the hell is this girl and how did she bag Charles freakin’ Leclerc?”

“Dude, we don’t even know for sure that it’s actually Charles,” Giovanni points out skeptically. “She never said his name. It could be some other rich dude with a fast car.”

Enzo scoffs and rolls his eyes. “Oh come on, who else could it be? €10,000 like it’s nothing, is it possible that Leclerc has a secret girlfriend we don’t know about all this time? A guy who likes driving fast cars? It’s obviously Charles! Our boy is LOADED and that’s exactly how he’d spoil his girl.”

Luca nods in agreement, a dreamy expression on his face. “God, can you imagine being with Charles though? Having him call you all those cute pet names and just showering you with love and gifts? I’d fucking die.”

“Yeah, she has to be the luckiest woman on the planet,” Enzo sighs wistfully. “I mean, I’m straight, but even I’d let Charles ruin me, you know what I’m saying?”

The other guys murmur and nod in emphatic agreement, all of them momentarily lost in a fantasy of being Charles Leclerc’s pampered significant other.

“Okay but like, how is this even fair?” Giovanni gripes, breaking the spell. “The rest of us mere mortals are out here busting our asses on Tinder and Hinge, praying a decent girl will swipe right, and Charles just gets to date a literal goddess who is probably a model?”

“Life isn’t fair, Gio,” Enzo says solemnly. “Charles is on a completely different level. He could have any woman he wants and they’d all say yes before he even finished asking. The rules don’t apply to a guy like that.”

Luca suddenly sits up straight, his eyes widening with realization. “Holy shit, guys. Do you know what this means? If Charles is taken, that’s one less F1 driver on the market for all those grid girl groupies to throw themselves at! Maybe the rest of us actually have a chance now!”

Giovanni snorts derisively. “Yeah, you wish. Those chicks are still gonna be busy trying to get with Sainz or Verstappen or Norris. They’re not gonna settle for some nobody Ferrari fan. Let’s be real.”

“Wow, way to kill the vibe, Debbie Downer,” Luca mutters. He turns back to the computer and hits replay on the video, watching enviously as the TikToker clearly shows the €10,000 bank transfer on your phone. “Seriously though, how is this chick not freaking the fuck out? If Charles Leclerc randomly sent me 10 grand I’d be screaming and probably pass out.”

“She’s probably used to it,” Enzo says with a shrug. “I bet this is like, a regular Tuesday for her. Just casually strolling around Monaco, stopping into designer stores whenever she feels like it, Charles’ black credit card weighing down her Hermès purse. The bougiest of WAG lives.”

“God, what I wouldn’t give to trade places with her for just one day,” Giovanni says longingly. “Can you imagine getting to wake up next to Charles every morning? Having him make you breakfast and give you forehead kisses and tell you how much he loves you in that sexy accent?”

“Okay, now you’re just torturing yourself, bro,” Luca laughs. “You’ll be lucky if you can get a Tinder match to agree to split the bill at McDonalds.”

“Why you gotta bring me back to my sad reality like that?” Giovanni groans, chucking a throw pillow at Luca’s head. “Let me live vicariously through Charles’ bougie mystery girlfriend for a little while longer, damn.”

Enzo sighs and leans back in his chair, hands behind his head. “You know what the craziest part of all this is? The fact that Charles managed to keep a whole ass girlfriend hidden from the world. Like, the media has been speculating about his love life forever and no one had a clue he was actually in a serious relationship. That man moves in silence like a ninja.”

“Yeah, and did you see how he just casually threw out that he loves her?” Luca gushes. “He was all I love spoiling you, you deserve the world. My dude is head over heels for this girl and I am LIVING for it.”

“Ugh, why can’t I find a man like that?” Giovanni whines dramatically. “All I want is a guy who will write me cute Instagram captions in three languages and buy out the Gucci store for me but I guess that’s too much to ask!”

“Maybe if you stanned Charles harder, the universe would reward you,” Enzo snarks. “Start leaving thirsty comments on his shirtless pics, see if that manifests your dream F1 boyfriend.”

“Bold of you to assume I don’t already do that,” Giovanni retorts with a smirk. “How else do you think Oscar Piastri ended up in my DMs last night?”

“Wait, WHAT?” Luca and Enzo exclaim in unison, whipping their heads around to gape at their friend.

Giovanni bursts out laughing at their shocked faces. “I’m just kidding, jeez! You think I’d be sitting here listening to you losers if Oscar freaking Piastri actually messaged me? Puh-lease.”

“Man, don’t even joke about that,” Enzo grumbles, clutching at his heart. “You really had me going there for a sec.”

Luca huffs and slouches down in his seat. “Can we get back to being jealous of Charles’ sugar baby girlfriend now? I was enjoying that more than whatever the hell this conversation turned into.”

“She’s not his sugar baby!” Enzo argues. “They’re clearly in love! Did we watch the same video? The way he talked to her was mad cute. That’s his GIRL girl.”

“You’re right, you’re right,” Luca concedes, holding his hands up in apology. “Charles might spoil her but he obviously adores her for more than just her looks. That’s the real relationship goals right there.”

“Imagine being so secure in your love that you can just ball out on your partner like that and know it’s only going to make them love you more,” Giovanni muses. “Cannot relate.”

Enzo nods sagely. “Charles is just built different, man. In more ways than one.”

“Truer words have never been spoken,” Luca agrees. “So, are we watching this video another 50 times or are we moving on to the Grill the Grid compilation I found of all of Charles’ most adorably flustered moments?”

Enzo grins maniacally and reaches for the mouse. “Oh, you know we’re watching the hell out of this absolute gift again. And then we’re gonna spend the next three hours cyberstalking Charles and seeing if we can find any other crumbs about who this legendary mystery woman is. For research purposes.”

“This is the most productive thing we’ve done in months and I’m not even ashamed,” Giovanni declares, cracking his knuckles in preparation for the intense social media deep dive they’re about to undertake.

***

In a crowded sports bar in Dublin, a group of die-hard Ferrari fans gather to watch the latest race. But today, there’s another bit of F1-related content that has their attention. They huddle around a phone, repeatedly watching the now-infamous TikTok video.

“Can you believe it? €10,000 just like that!” Exclaims James, a tall, lanky guy with a mop of curly hair. “I mean, I knew Charles was loaded but damn ...”

“Forget the money, did you see his girlfriend?” Tom, a stocky redhead, chimes in. “Absolutely stunning. Like, how does a race car driver land a girl like that?”

Mark, a quieter guy with glasses, rolls his eyes. “Uh, maybe because he’s Charles freaking Leclerc? The man’s a beast on the track and has the face of a Greek god. Girls probably throw themselves at him left and right.”

The guys all mutter in begrudging agreement, a note of envy coloring their voices. On screen, the video replays yet again, showing you confidently calling up your boyfriend and securing the small fortune without batting an eye.

“God, what I wouldn’t give to have a woman look at me the way she probably looks at Leclerc,” Tom sighs wistfully.

“In your dreams, mate,” James scoffs. “Girls like that are way out of our league. We can’t compete with a Ferrari paycheck and Monaco real estate.”

“Still doesn’t seem fair though,” grumbles Mark. “The dude’s already got it all — talent, fame, money. Leave some for the rest of us!”

On screen, the video reaches the part where you coolly inform the gobsmacked TikToker that you don’t need his measly €2,000 and he should donate it to an animal shelter instead. The guys let out low whistles, clearly impressed by your classy move.

“See, that right there, that’s what separates the Monegasque princess types from regular girls,” says James with an air of authority. “We would’ve taken the cash in a heartbeat.”

“Speak for yourself, I’m a man of principle,” Tom jokes, puffing out his chest exaggeratedly. The others snort and shove him playfully.

As the video ends, the guys sit back, each lost in their own wistful imaginings of what it must be like to be Charles Leclerc. To have the money, success, and effortless charm to win over a girl like you.

Mark is the first to break the contemplative silence. “Maybe we’re looking at this all wrong,” he muses thoughtfully. “I mean yeah, Charles is a lucky bastard, no doubt. But that girl, she seems like a real catch too. Like the kind of person who’d keep you humble and grounded, even when you’re a superstar athlete with the world at your feet.”

The others consider this, nodding slowly. “Fair point,” concedes Tom. “Behind every great man and all that jazz. Leclerc may have his millions but he still needs someone to call him out on his BS from time to time.”

“Exactly,” agrees Mark. “And did you hear the way he spoke to her on the phone? The dude’s completely smitten. He may have all the money and fame, but I bet she’s the real prize in his eyes.”

“Alright, alright, settle down Dr. Phil,” James interjects with a good-natured eye roll. “You gonna start writing romance novels in your spare time now? Maybe they’ll make a movie — The Tifosi Who Loved Me: A Charles Leclerc Story.”

The guys all crack up laughing at that, the tension broken. Their envy towards Leclerc’s charmed life remains, but it’s now tinged with a newfound respect and even a touch of empathy.

“Y’know, jokes aside, I do hope he realizes how lucky he is to have her and treats her right,” Mark says sincerely as their chuckles subside. “A love like that seems rare these days.”

Tom reaches over to clap Mark on the shoulder. “No worries, mate. Did you see the dopey grin on Charles’ face in those paparazzi pics of them together that came out earlier? That man is whipped with a capital W. He knows he’s got a keeper.”

“As he should,” nods James sagely. “Behind every great Ferrari champion is an even greater woman keeping his ego in check. Tale as old as time.”

On that note, the guys clink their pint glasses together, silently saluting the unnamed woman who stole the heart of Charles Leclerc and the envious admiration of Formula 1 fans worldwide. The mystery girlfriend with impeccable style and a heart of gold.

As the pre-race coverage starts up on the bar TV, the guys settle in to cheer on their favorite driver, their fleeting jealousy replaced by the camaraderie and excitement of race day. But in the back of their minds, a single wistful thought remains — what they wouldn’t give to find a love like Charles and his girl seem to share. Guess that’s just one more thing to add to the list of reasons to idolize Charles Leclerc.

***

Among the hordes of viewers obsessively replaying the clip are three best friends gathered for a girls night at a posh Parisian penthouse. Colette, the willowy blonde draped across a velvet chaise lounge, takes a sip of her champagne and shakes her head in wonder.

“God, can you imagine having a boyfriend who just casually drops 10k on you like it’s nothing? Talk about relationship goals,” she sighs dreamily.

Next to her, Nadia snorts derisively while scrolling through Instagram on her phone. “Oh please, like that’s hard to find. I bet loads of rich guys would do that for their girlfriends. It’s not that impressive.”

From her perch on a tufted ottoman, Stephanie raises a skeptical eyebrow. “Really? You think Liam would send you that kind of cash without batting an eye? Mr. I-Need-To-Check-With-My-Financial-Advisor-Before-I-Buy-A-New-Tie?”

Colette erupts into giggles at the scathing impression of Nadia’s banker boyfriend. Even Nadia cracks a reluctant smile before tossing her sleek dark hair.

“Whatever. I’m just saying, that TikTok chick’s boyfriend can’t be THAT special. I’m sure if we did the same challenge our boyfriends would come through too,” she declares with more than a hint of competitiveness in her voice.

“Oooh yes, let’s do it! Let’s recreate the video and see what happens!” Colette squeals, bouncing up and down on the chaise with excitement.

Stephanie, ever the voice of reason, looks uncertain. “I don’t know, guys ... isn’t it a bit tacky to demand money from them like that? What if they get mad?”

Nadia rolls her eyes. “Oh come on Steph, live a little! It’s just a silly experiment. Where’s your sense of adventure?”

“Okay, okay fine,” Stephanie relents, unable to resist her friends’ cajoling. “But I’m blaming you both if Omer breaks up with me over this!”

“Deal!” Colette grins impishly as she grabs her phone. “I’ll go first — let me call Henry and we’ll see if he’s as generous as Mystery Monaco Man.”

With a deep breath, she dials her property developer boyfriend and launches into her rehearsed plea as soon as he picks up. “Baby!” She whines. “You’ll never believe what happened. I’m out with the girls and my Louboutins broke! Like the heel just totally snapped off. I’m absolutely gutted, these were my faves. Is there any way you could send some money to my account so I can grab a new pair on the way home? Pleeeaaase, I’ll love you forever!”

There’s a heavy pause before Henry’s clipped voice comes through, tinged with annoyance. “Christ, again with the bloody shoes? What is it with you women and wasting my hard earned money on bits of leather you don’t need? Can’t you just take the broken ones to get fixed?”

Colette’s perfectly glossed pout trembles, her blue eyes shining with disappointed tears as Nadia and Stephanie look on in pity. “Never mind,” she mumbles. “Forget I asked. Chat later.” She hangs up and flings her phone down despondently.

“What an ass,” Nadia spits. “You deserve so much better.” Colette shrugs sadly but rallies as she turns to Stephanie expectantly.

“Okay Steph, your turn to give Omer a ring! Let’s hope he restores our faith in rich boyfriends everywhere.”

Stephanie grimaces but dutifully calls her Qatar-based hedge fund manager beau. In her most saccharine voice, she makes her case. “Habibi, you know that gorgeous YSL bag I showed you last week? It finally came back in stock but only for today! Could you maybe pop some cash in my account so I can treat myself? I’ve been working so hard lately and-”

“Wallahi Stephanie, how many handbags does one woman need?” Omer cuts her off irritably. “If I buy you this one, I don’t want to hear any more whining for designer things for at least 6 months, got it? I’ll send you 500 euros, that should more than cover it.”

“Oh. Right. Thanks, I guess ...” Stephanie replies glumly before ending the call. She shakes her head at her friends. “Well, it’s something at least?”

“Hardly,” Nadia scoffs. “These men, I swear. Okay, time for me to show you girls how it’s done. Watch and learn, ladies.”

With a confident smirk, she video calls Liam who answers distractedly, clearly still at the office despite the late hour. “This better be important Nadia, I’m right in the middle of-”

“Liam. Focus,” Nadia cuts him off crisply. “I need you to send €10,000 to my account right now. No questions asked.” She arches a commanding eyebrow, daring him to argue.

Liam just blinks at her for a moment before letting out an incredulous laugh. “I’m sorry, you need me to do what now? 10 grand, are you mad? For what possible reason?”

“To prove you love me,” Nadia retorts smugly. “I saw this thing on TikTok, some girl’s boyfriend sent her-”

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” Liam interrupts. “I’m not one of your little social media playthings to manipulate for views, Nadia. My money is not a toy. I’ll buy you a thoughtful gift for your birthday next month, but I’m not in the business of flinging cash at you for no reason. Now if you’ll excuse me, some of us have real work to do. Goodnight.”

With that he abruptly ends the call, leaving Nadia staring at the blank screen, a red flush of embarrassment and anger creeping up her elegant neck. Stephanie and Colette exchange knowing looks.

“So … that went well,” Stephanie quips sarcastically.

Colette sighs morosely as she flops back onto the chaise, hugging a silk pillow. “Maybe that girl’s boyfriend really is one of a kind. God, I bet she feels like the luckiest woman alive. Can you even imagine being THAT loved and adored?”

Nadia seems to deflate, her bravado evaporating. “No,” she whispers. “I can’t. You’re right, Col. Mystery Monaco Man is clearly in a league of his own. I bet he makes her feel like an absolute queen every damn day.”

Stephanie nods thoughtfully, twirling a lock of hair. “You know what though? Good for her. She seems lovely and down-to-earth in the video. If anyone deserves that fairy tale romance, it’s a girl like that who doesn’t even realize how special it is.”

“Ugh, so true. god I’m depressed now,” Colette groans, reaching for the champagne bottle to refill her glass. “To Mystery Monaco Man — may he set the standard for rich boyfriends everywhere. And to the girl who’s lucky enough to love him — may she live happily ever after and never take a single moment for granted.”

“Hear, hear,” Nadia and Stephanie chorus, clinking their glasses against Colette’s.

As the bubbles fizz on their tongues, the wistful faraway looks in their eyes betray the same thought — what they wouldn’t give to trade places with you for just a day, to know what it feels like to be cherished so completely by a man like Charles. To them, you’re living the ultimate dream.

If only they knew the best part isn’t the extravagant gestures or lavish gifts.

It’s the little moments. The soft kisses pressed to your temple. The fingers intertwined with yours. The sleepy smiles over morning coffee. The shared laughter and inside jokes. The unwavering support and unconditional acceptance. The bone-deep feeling of safety and coming home.

That’s the real fairy tale. And no amount of money could ever buy it.

***

Back in Monaco, Lando Norris slouches comfortably in his gaming chair, eyes glued to the triple monitors in front of him. He’s meant to be reviewing telemetry data in preparation for the upcoming race weekend, but the notification chime from his phone proves far too tempting. Lando picks up the device, fully intending to only glance at it for a second before dutifully returning to his work.

But then he sees it — the TikTok that at least a dozen people have sent to him in the past hour alone. Curiosity piqued, Lando clicks on the video and watches intently, his brows steadily rising towards his hairline with each passing second.

“Wait, is that ...” he mutters to himself as the clip plays out. When your boyfriend’s voice comes through the speakers, Lando’s eyes bug out comically. “Holy shit, it is Charles! And Y/N!”

A knock on the door makes Lando jump slightly. Before he can respond, a familiar mop of tousled chestnut hair pokes into the room. “Hey mate, did you see-” Max Verstappen starts to say.

“The TikTok of Charles simping hard for Y/N? Yup, watching it right now,” Lando finishes for him, eyes still glued to his phone screen in fascination.

Max invites himself into the room fully and flops down on the couch. “Absolutely crazy, right? Who just casually sends their girlfriend 10k for a random pair of shoes?”

Lando snorts. “Certainly not you, you stingy Dutchman,” he ribs playfully. Max chucks a throw pillow at him in retaliation.

“Hey, even I splurge on my girlfriend sometimes!” Max protests. “I just bought her ... erm ...” He racks his brain trying to remember the last lavish gift he purchased unprompted.

“A six-pack of Sugar Free Red Bull last week?” Lando supplies dryly.

“... Shut up.”

The two dissolve into snickers before turning their attention back to the TikTok, which has now looped to the beginning again.

“Charles is so whipped for Y/N,” Max observes, shaking his head in amused disbelief. “He’s just asking to get taken advantage of, throwing money around like that.”

“I think it’s kinda sweet,” Lando admits with a shrug. “He just wants to make her happy. Don’t act like you wouldn’t do the same if your girl asked!”

Max scoffs. “What, fall victim to a gold digger? No thanks mate.”

“Y/N’s hardly a gold digger and you know it,” Lando chides. “She works hard for her own money and buys plenty of expensive gifts for Charles too. They just like spoiling each other ‘cause they’re in luuurve.” He draws out the last word in a silly voice, making dramatic kissy faces.

“Yeah, yeah, true love and all that sappy bullshit,” Max says dismissively, though there’s no real heat behind it. “I’m just saying, no way in hell I’m sending 10k on command for a pair of fucking shoes!”

Lando hums thoughtfully. “I would.”

Max’s head whips around to stare at him incredulously. “You what.”

“If it was the right girl? Sure, I’d do it,” Lando says nonchalantly. “Maybe not for something frivolous like shoes, but if my girlfriend called me up and said she needed 10k transferred ASAP? I’d do it, no questions asked. You gotta have that level of trust.”

Clearly torn between wanting to take the piss out of his friend and feeling a reluctant sort of respect, Max just grunts noncommittally in response before turning back to rewatch the clip once more.

Debate rages online among the fans about the cute interaction. Most find the whole thing adorably romantic, cooing over what a doting and generous boyfriend Charles is. They swoon at the obvious love and care between you two, speculating excitedly in the comments about when Charles might pop the question.

Others are more cynical, rolling their eyes at Charles “simping” so hard and accusing you of only dating the Ferrari driver for his money. However, these naysayers are quickly drowned out and ratio’d by your legions of adoring supporters.

Through it all, you and Charles pay the speculation little mind, blissfully wrapped up in your fairytale romance.

Charles returns home that evening to the mouthwatering aroma of his favorite pesto pasta dish wafting from the kitchen. He grins when he spots you at the stove, swaying your hips to the sultry jazz music playing from the speaker as you stir the sauce. Quietly, he comes up behind you and slips his strong arms around your waist, pressing a kiss to your temple.

“Mmm, smells amazing,” he murmurs appreciatively.

You turn in his embrace and loop your arms around his neck, smiling radiantly up at him. “Welcome home, Cha-Cha,” you greet him, using the silly pet name that never fails to make him chuckle and scrunch his nose adorably. “Dinner’s almost ready.”

“And what’s for dessert?” Charles asks with a playful waggle of his eyebrows.

Biting your lip coyly, you untangle yourself from his arms and saunter off towards the bedroom. “Come find out after we eat. Oh, and I picked up a little something special to express my gratitude for earlier ...” you call over your shoulder with a wink.

Charles’ megawatt grin could power all of Monaco for a year. Viral TikTok or not, the Monegasque knows he’s already the luckiest man in the world to have you as his partner through this crazy ride called life.

No amount of money could ever compare to the joy of being loved by you.

[hkthatgffan]

Hey, Kiki-Kit. Your customers are waiting!

Well, this is a painful post to make given the respect and admiration I had for her, but a long overdue one because I'm not alone in this mess and I refuse to let another fan fall for it when I could've said something!

Back in February, I bought a commission from Kiki-Kit. You may know that artist as she was one of the best in the Gravity Falls fandom back in the day and the illustrator of Don't Dimension It in Lost Legends.

She'd been running emergency commissions at the start of the year and I got one from her for $40 USD.

I have the invoice and everything saved and also messages with Kiki of us talking about the comm and me paying her. I owe nothing on my end money wise! I paid in full.

She said later she'd have them finished by around the end of March but come late April, still no response. So, I messaged her about it. Nothing odd I thought. I get things can happen and if Kiki is busy, at most she'd reply telling me it'll be a while longer and all's good.

But I got nothing. I messaged her, emailed her on the commissions email she had and tweeted at her. NOTHING! Turns out there were other people, including some friends of mine who had not heard back either. Then in June, Kiki made an update post explaining the situation.

Naturally I felt bad and wished her the best. She said iirc, she'd have the remaining comms done by the end of the Summer but here we are at the end of October and still nothing. I messaged her too again and no response.

You know, it's one thing if there's a reason for no response for a few days but then another when it's been months and still nothing. Oh and btw, I very much remember Kiki on Twitter liking tweets (back when Twitter let you see liked tweets) while I was there messaging her for an update. Real sus if you ask me.

But okay, I shouldn't rush it. Everyone has reasons to take time and maybe Kiki is just very busy and can't get back. She went through a very rough and difficult experience and I can understand and respect that. I'm more than happy to wait. But how long is too long without an update? Maybe a bit longer I guess. Art takes time.

Well, IDK about you all, but I don't remember any other Gravity Falls fan artist taking oh, idk...FIVE YEARS TO FINISH A COMMISION AND STILL NOT RESPOND!!

FoxieSkullzArtz on Twitter made me aware she has been waiting since 2019 for Kiki to respond to a commission they paid her for.

2019!!

I'm not an artist, so forgive me if I'm wrong. But I don't think it should take any artist 5 years to make a commission and even if, at least communicate with the person who paid you about it so they're not left guessing.

Oh, and it gets worse. I got another person who let me know they've been waiting since 2020 for a comm and Kiki handled it far worse!

Oh yeah, she blocked them for asking about it!

And okay, even if we give Kiki-Kit the benefit of the doubt and assume she has reasons to not communicate with people and maybe even assume people messaging her are being mean about it, then why not refund them? Nice or bad, you were paid by them to do something but also have the power to deny it and refund their money. And yet, Kiki did not even do that. And even if we be super kind and assume everyone is lying, I'm still here.

I paid Kiki-Kit $40USD for a comm I thought I would get in late March and it's now late October and still nothing. And even if you don't wanna believe me cause you can't believe an artist like Kiki-Kit would do this and assume I'm after clout (which would be odd, given why would I take pleasure in calling out an artist I respected)...well, there's gonna be someone else who says this too. And people have been saying this for years and she still is getting away with it!

It's disappointing honestly. Kiki-Kit is a name so many in this fandom know and love. And I love her art too. She's a fan artist who got to be on Lost Legends. We all celebrated that in 2018 and still remember it. And I know how hard it may be to hear this, but it has to be said.

I do not like having to do this, but I have a platform that can get this message across further than others could and having been someone who lost money to her too, I know first hand what all these people have been through.

And before you say "Kiki was going through a rough time in her life. Why are you blaming her? Be patient and she'll get your stupid art done," read over everything again. I'm not saying Kiki-Kit needs to be making art 24/7 and fulfilling these comms. I'm not saying she isn't allowed to be offline and not finish things on time for reasons out of her control. What I'm saying is that she hasn't communicated properly with anyone here who paid her and has continued to accept more and more commissions from people despite not finishing ones she has backlogs of.

When an artist opens commissions, why do you think they have slots or only accept a few? Because they know they can get that many done in a certain time or know anymore will take longer. And even if it took longer, at least they give updates. I bought a commission for the interview with Alex Hirsch and got it both on time and with proper communication from the artist.

And even if you disagree with all this, be honest with yourself...is making someone wait since 2019 or 2020 for a comm and not responding to them really something still worth defending?

I'm not here to cancel anyone. I don't want Kiki-Kit's reputation to be that of an scammer who stole money from people. But she's painted herself that way to far too many people who have been warning about this for ages but no one either saw or listened to them.

I tried to be nice and messaged Kiki-Kit over and over for an update and she never responded. I had friends who she took money from who similarly have not heard anything back! If you know Kiki directly, tell her to reach out to these people and all the ones she has taken money from and not gotten back to and either refund them or commit to finishing their commissions. Please don't be rude or hostile either though, given despite it all, she is still a person like your or me who deserves a chance to make things right.

I wanna believe Kiki-Kit has just made some negligent mistakes and isn't the best with time management or communication. I mean, I'm not the best either. But I'm not asking people for money for something and then not getting back to them with it. I'm sorry to everyone who is learning about this who saw Kiki in a positive light and I'm sorry also to everyone like me who lost money to her.

I hope if nothing else, Kiki will respond and make whole everyone she has taken money from. If she really cares about this fandom that put her on a pedestal high enough that Alex Hirsch himself picked her to work on his book, she can respond to us and fulfill what we paid her to do.

I'm not asking for my commission to be done tomorrow...I just want an update. That's all. We all do! No more stalling, @kiki-kit. Please respond to us now!

Sincerely,

Every person who has paid you for a commission and has yet to hear back from you and every Gravity Falls fan who your work inspired and are now having to learn this about you!

[tinystepsforward]

automattic vs wp engine mastterpost

adrienne's GitHub recap is probably the best place to see a comprehensive timeline of what's going down. it's been kept up to date. my (very out of date) previous writeup is here.

what's happened/other links

Matt has not logged off, just switched platforms, so there's lots on X/Twitter, Reddit, and Hacker News. it's really not worth wading through.

WP Engine actually filed suit.

the complaint includes some truly remarkable screenshots of Matt trying to blackmail the CEO of WP Engine.

which... personally i would not happily work for someone who just blackmailed me while not even my boss, but that's just me. he hasn't denied this at all, in fact confirming on Hacker News:

I haven't doxxed any private texts from other parties like they have. [source]

and, notably,

I even invited her to my 40th birthday on Jan 11, another text message she decided not to share. [source]

this gives me the creeps. in the context of the rest of the way he's talking to her, and the ways in which he's interacted with women in general, it's. not great.

also he slid into an ex-employee (also a woman)'s DMs asking why she was being mean to him bc he'd never been nothing but nice to her, while also making legal threats. so y'know, pattern of behaviour.

a good writeup of the social side of things

if you don't care so much about the open-source stuff, Steph Lundberg's writeup is, like her previous one on Matt's Tumblr meltdown, pretty solid and people-focused.

Mullenweg has already demonstrated egregious lapses in judgment and abuses of power, it’s just that up until now he’s wielded his power against vulnerable populations without access to high-powered lawyers and their own massive platforms.

a more technical writeup

this one is melodramatic in the same ways Matt was (uses war terminology), which i don't agree with, and which led to some... internal arguments at Automattic. that part's not my story to tell, but a little more on that later. it's a solid writeup of the actual WordPress side of things. there's some seriously dodgy trademark behaviour going on here.

of note: this blogger locked comments on his post:

and then Matt, uh, found a way around that:

wild!

10% of Automattic leaves

that's a link to Matt's blog post. here's an Internet Archive link.

in short, staff were offered a severance deal of the higher of $30k or six months' salary. while that's very generous, it's still very risky in today's tech market, especially (for the same reasons i mentioned when Matt was melting down on here) for people outside the US, people who need the health insurance, or people with young kids. despite that, 10% decided with very little notice (they had two days to decide) to leave.

However now, I feel much lighter. I’m grateful and thankful for all the people who took the offer, and even more excited to work with those who turned down $126M to stay. As the kids say, LFG!

i'm thrilled to see some of my ex-colleagues make it out. i'm keeping the rest who have stayed on in my thoughts. i don't know anyone who's wholesale shilling for Matt.

Matt's been pressuring staff to post in support of him, @-ing the entire company to vote on Twitter polls in his favor, and so on. many of the people who stayed have written blog posts about it, all starting with "I stayed". people on social media have pointed out the very clear pattern of Automatticians jumping into discourse to defend Matt, and it doesn't look good.

i don't have a lot to say about those posts, except to highlight Jeffrey Zeldman, whose "I stayed" post is perhaps one of the more honest ones. (his Rodney King reference was in poor taste, and he... i don't like his role at automattic, tbc) but like. he's nearly 70. he helped shape the modern internet and develop its accessibility standards. he has often put his neck on the line for disabled staff who don't have as much clout as he does. given the financial troubles he talks about and the state of this market and how old he is, i personally have read between the lines of what he's saying in a particular way.

fuck, man. i'm sad. i'm sad for all my friends who are creaking under the strain and watching others leave but who can't do that. i'm sad that many of them are left in teams which are half-empty or divisions where significant senior leadership are just gone, with no time to document what they had in progress.

i'm sad for Josepha Haden Chomphosy, the former executive director of the WordPress Foundation, who was dealing with a personal emergency and ended up having to miss WordCamp US (where Matt started publicly starting shit with WPE). she came back from that to a gigantic fire in the community she's invested a decade of careful, Matt-negotiating, stewardship to, and decided to take the severance offer. she deserved better.

other things Matt's been up to

mostly linking to comments or posts which compile things here, bc it's too scattered otherwise.

blocking people from the official WordPress X account if they disapprove of his actions.

publicly talking about a vulnerability in ACF, a plugin WPE maintains, which could put thousands of sites at risk. this is not normal, and he met with so much horror even from current staff that he deleted his post.

saying he comes across badly because he's "a little ASD", which is driving me personally up the fucking wall. he's never once said it before and he really is turning into Temu Elon.

generally bragging that he still has more planned. jesus fucking christ

continually saying that WPE's suit is against WordPress.org and the community, which is not true. on which note, his pinned tweet is certainly something:

his choice of lawyer is uh. the kind of guy to defend nestle against literal child slaves.

as always, while i think WordPress crumbling will disproportionately affect websites in poorer parts of the world, there are certainly tyrants who are causing much more immediate and potent suffering. if you've read this far, please do send anything you have spare to gazafunds.com.

[stxrr-strxckk]

hi! can you do headcanons of what is it like to date quackity in 2018/2019? your writing is really good btw 🫶🏻

Aww, ty! Gonna be honest, I don't know too much about 2018/2019 Quackity (I didn't watch him as much as I did in 2021/2022) but I'll try anyways!

You're just one click away!

(Dating 2018/19 era quackity!)

Pairing: Quackity x gn!reader

Any warnings?: Nope!

Whats that on the record player?: Hello?; Clairo

✭First off: You probably met him online. Whether that was during one of his raids, in an online chatroom, discord's got talent, or just through common interests, one things for sure: he was smitten.

✭Always calling you, texting you, inviting you to hang out, whatever you want. Anything for his princesa <3

✭Probably tells chat about you.

"Gamers, I have to confess something." Alex states dramatically. "So, there's this person, right? And they're SO cool. Like, the coolest person I know. And I need to impress them so lets make this raid turn out good, okay?"

✭You have a feeling it's you and it's a bit silly seeing him be so whipped

✭When you guys get together he's so happy he's yapping about it to all of his friends and fans.

"Gamers, remember that person I told you about? Well I finally fucking pulled them, thank god! Yeah, hide your girl 'cause I've got game over here. The people love me!"

✭Invites you to judge Discord's got talent with him and spends the entire time flirting with you.

"Okay, so you're talent is singing, correct?" Quackity asks. The contestant replies and you smile. "I love guys who sing. It's so romantic!" Alex perks up at this. "Actually, you know, I'm a pretty good singer myself. Yeah, uh, I'll actually- I'll actually serenade you guys right here. Right now. And you can see who's the better singer." He grins when he hears you and the other judges laughing at his singing. "So, how was that?" he asks when he's done. "It's gonna be a no for me." you laugh, and the other judge agrees. "What? After all that? This is crazy. You guys can't judge anymore." He laughs, kicking the other judge from the call. "Aah, don't kick me! I'm too young to die!" you joke. "Okay, fine. You're too cute to kick anyways..."

✭Also features you in raids like all the time. Lets you pick out the games he raids.

✭You two make so many roblox videos with the craziest fucking clips ever. They're titled stuff like: Roblox with my s/o is the funniest thing ever and roblox sucks way less with my s/o (kinda corny but still really cute)

✭You two play crappy games together and make fun of them in videos

✭When he gets banned from twitter and discord and other sites he has you make a cameo in his video and ask for his account back.

"Okay, so I just read the card?" you ask Alex, who's behind the camera. He nods. "But this doesn't sound like me at all." You deadpan, and he laughs, almost dropping the camera. "Just read it anyways, for the clout!" "Fine." you roll your eyes. "You're lucky I love you." you clear your throat as Alex straightens the camera and focuses the lens. "Dear twitter: please please please give my super handsome boyfriend his account back. He is too hot and too cool to be banned, and it makes me very very sad. If he remains banned I'll cry forever- Alex, this doesn't sound like me at all." you laugh. "Hey, you're not getting paid to complain!" "I'm not getting paid at all!" "Shhh, they don't know that!"

✭Overall very cute and funny. 10/10 would ship again.

A/n: first set of hcs! Hope you enjoyed, make sure to like, follow, reblog, and submit any requests!

wordcount:618

[orgasming-caterpillar]

Mahabharat characaters on Social Media: pt. 3

Pt. 2

Dhritarashtra

Boomer

Does not know what social media is used for

Only social media he uses is Facebook and WhatsApp

Sends 👌 and 👍 in response to everything

Old as fuck and partially blind

Thinks Duryodhan is gonna join the army since he's training so much (he won't, he just likes to have muscles and challenge bheem)

Gandhari

"A day in my life as a selectively blind person"

BLINDFOLD CHALLENGES LMFAOOOOOO

Here's ten reasons why I've never seen my children's faces

1. Judging from my husband's personality and... other things, they're probably ugly

Cutu cutu mom-daughter vlogs with dushala

Pandu

He's dead.

Don't ask me for anything he's just dead in this au that's all he is

Used to cameo on madri's channel a suspiciously large amount of time

Kunti

Wholesome cooking channel

With stories in the voiceovers

Does livestreams teaching people to cook

Internet mom for many teenagers countrywide

Randomly drops insane mom lore in the middle of cooking

"There was this one time I had to put my newborn kid up for adoption because I was 17 at the time and now he's adopted by a neighbour and also my nephew's boyfriend so if any of you know a good therapist please recommend."

Madri

Used to be on twitter only but she overshared too much and had to be making insanely long apology videos over it

Does QNAs only and people watch that just cuz she's such a problematic cunt

"Madri you said in one post that you were married but you've never mentioned your husband." "Madri you made posts about post partum depression but you never mentioned your kids."

Replies to this with a video explaining how she was having an affair with a certain influencer's husband and got pregnant with twins but then the guy died of a heart attack so she left his SINGLE MOTHER wife with two more sons

The people hate her for what she's done. She loves them for the clout they give her.

Vidur

He doesn't do social media. He does what people call "A Job".

Only on Facebook. Only there to bunk people who spread misinformation.

Also now on ao3

[riacte]

Re: popularity and clout gap, this thought has been lurking at the back of my mind but it didn’t hit me until a friend pointed out it was like how some parts of the audience used to treat hermits in MCC. As in: the hermits could achieve something technically amazing but were ignored simply because they weren’t popular (see False’s back to back win being ignored post MCC12) when the exact same achievement would cause them to lose their minds if it was done by someone who was more “popular”.

Post Demise 2, I joked this was like Blue Bats over again in which False (and Ren) won with the power of friendship in a wholesome storyline yet some parts of the audience chose to be salty their fave didn’t win instead. Sometimes you can see such a severe cognitive dissonance because people watch different hermits. Like that post on Reddit innocuously asking about Perry when I’d seen him around for weeks now and people pointed out Perry had been featured in the Neighbourhood’s videos for a while. (Nothing wrong with the post but it shows how vastly different the viewing experience is.)

It’s kind of like we’re back to 2020/21 era esque “hermit erasure” but it’s (unintentionally) done by some hermit fans. Okay, actually I’ll erase the unintentionally. Plenty of people only watch a few hermits and I emphasise that is fine and you can do anything you want forever. Enjoy HC in any way you like. Be free. The problem only surfaces when people pretend their corner is the only corner that exists and everyone else are the side characters. Like, it’s really fine to admit you don’t know everything. Someone on the MCC Reddit tried making teams and admitted they didn’t know the hermits well but somehow their teams ended up being more hermit accurate than most teams I’ve seen.

This situating done by some parts of the audience of some hermits as “main” and some hermits as “side” to the whole production of Hermitcraft makes me think of 2020/21 MCC again. In which people were discussing protagonists and villains and cannon fodder. Which was why I wrote Battle Scars, a parody / satire / sincere piece of work / whatever, to show that my faves (Blue Bats) could be the protagonists too. And it feels like I’m back. Scrambling to script my faves as characters worthy to have their stories told. Why are we back again.

And why does it lowkey feel worse because this is happening within the same fandom.

… And now I realise that’s also part of why I wrote Feel It Still, another crack treated seriously fic. Because it’s a Superhero AU proudly situating my faves in the lead roles based on canon stuff, while the typical protagonists of Superhero AUs in this fandom are delegated to side characters and are the trainees under a main hero. It’s this sort of twisting of canon that I keep on (subconsciously) doing, attempting to give some sort of spotlight to my faves by mimicking / parodying fandom trends and tropes, trying to make them more palatable and spread propaganda or whatever.

Tldr: it feels like we’re back to “hermit erasure” era and there’s a lot of fanon attention on a few. And you just know certain events would receive significant more attention if they were done by the popular hermits instead of the less popular ones. But it’s mostly crickets outside my circle and the people that I know of. Like hey yeah this is someone I know from chat and someone I know from Twitter. And I know about “being the change you want to see” and “make stuff you want to see” and “promote your faves”. I know. We all know.

It just gets tiring sometimes.

In the end, a number’s game is a number’s game.

[xx-slug-xx]

Here's a summary of some keypoints that Sabersparked touched on in his video about Kyle Carrozza

He made it clear he Does Not Like lolisho, and doubts that Ang's therapist really told them coping like that was okay, even going so far as questioning the validity of using art like this to cope

He constantly mixed up the terms CSEM and CSAM

He said he didn't like either of them right after talking about Ang attempting suicide

He claimed he supports Kyle's victims... while leaving out Ang

He completely glossed over the involvement of Holly Meadow Disch, Tony Goldmark and Jane because the whole thing is too "terminally online" to get half the understanding of

He touched on YoumaCon, but was mostly bitter about people trying to convince the con staff to kick Kyle from it

He calls out Kyle's grandstanding on lolisho while having his own collection

He made a nod to Kyle's GDrive being "borked" as a sign that he Fucked Up Majorly

He completely ignored Jane and Tony trying to cover their asses and denying they knew Kyle was grooming people (even though Jane admitted they knew)

He made a scathing remark about how Kyle tried to be different from John K (Ren and Stimpy creator), but ended up just like him in many aspects

In the video he referenced someone else's twitter account, who was also one of Kyle's blacklisted victims. However, Saberspark not only got the info wrong, he also didn't ask the person if he could use their tweets

To sum up: he made a video with half assed research and it feels like he did so for clout

All the man does now a days is make videos for clout tbh. He wanted to get likes and views on a popular subject of discourse and didn’t even bother to talk about the facts at all. This isn’t about “oh well lolicon makes me feel gross”. It’s about abuse done to real people and a man getting away with it BECAUSE of people’s adverse reaction to lolicon! He can say it’s chronically online all he wants, but he still decided to post about it. If he didn’t want to go down the “chronically online” rabbit hole, why make a video about it to begin with?

I won’t watch the video because I refuse too give the man money for cashing in on the suffering of others while not saying anything with accuracy :/

[live-laugh-lenney]

Hellur, how are uu!!! This is my first time in tumblr. And there are only a few of george clarke or arthurtv fics. Very thankful for one of the people who creates them🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️

May i request a reaction for Arthur or George where all of their fans love their gf, especially she's just a normal beautiful gal 😍😍😍 what if their girl has dimplessss

hi lovely. welcome to tumblr, welcome to my blog, welcome to a safe place to come vent and chat all things arthurtv and chaos crew as well as youtube! lots of love! thank you for popping by - don't be a stranger, at all. i have so many thoughts for this :')))

G E O R G E

everyone loves her.

he takes his time to introduce her publicly because she's isn't a girl who is known - she's not a youtuber, she's not a tiktoker, she's not an influencer so he wants to slowly wean her into the chaos of his life and shield her from twitter's hate and the tiktok comments that will be written about her.

because, of course, there will always be some people who dislike her - its part and parcel of being with him and she knows that.

those that love her, she loves back. she always keeps an eye on her social media, always checks in with them, replies to their tweets and she does little q and a's on her instagram story about herself... with the occasional question about her and george or anything to do with their relationship (without going into much detail - she leaves that for his podcast).

and he definitely has her on for an episode, alongside andrew, like a couple's podcast episode where they just spill the beans on what it's like to date max and george. from the horse's mouth comments from someone who is dating someone so loved and well-known in their industry line of work.

"i'm pretty sure everyone loves yn more than they love me."

"what can i say? you're not the only one with a pretty face., georgey boy."

"it's the dimples, i'm telling you."

and she will always tease him because she knows how loved she is in amongst his followers. always having pictures taken at events they see her at, taking cute and funny selfies, hugging those who want to give her a hug and george just loves to see it happen.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

A R T H U R

his followers speculate before arthur actually announces that they're in a relationship...

he's much more of a soft launcher with the two of them as opposed to completely introducing her - he never sees the point in posting her alongside her social tags because she's not someone known to many in the world.

he can't hide on social media; and that doesn't stop him from being a simp for her. people go digging once they see them together in public, people see that he likes her posts, they can see his comments and he doesn't see the problem because that's his girl and if he wants to show his love for her than he can. he just chooses not to launch her hard by giving her a dedicated post so people know who she is.

so when it's been long enough, and he sees that people love her and want to see more of her, he starts bringing her onto his channel.

that's how he properly and formerly introduces her.

"yn's here with me today."

"he needs the views, figured he may as well use me as clout."

"well- no, that's not- no-"

he gets so soft in the face, cheeks going red and he stutters and she loves that he still gets giddy over how she has such witty remarks back to him.

"i'm just messing, i'm here for my five minutes of fame."

"again, not what's happening."

and it's just sweet moments where people can truly see them for how they actually are together - so sickeningly in love with each other that it's almost too sweetly gross to witness.

and, my god, the edits that come out of it are something yn could sit and watch for days because it really captures just how they are as a couple. and she's no stranger to sharing them on her socials, saving them to her camera roll, showing them to arthur when they're sitting and aimlessly scrolling their accounts, commenting how she loves them and that it's so special to have their sweet and loving moments documented in such a way.

out in public, he's so soft with her and always stands close to her on their museum dates and they're always holding hands down the busy streets of london and he always holds her close to him on the tubes whenever they need to get public transports and he's always weary of her going over to meet those who had seen the two of them in the street... people take photos, they take videos, they share them all over the internet - they can't stop them from doing that. he knows she's just being kind but he always tells her that she can never been too careful. but she loves them just as much as he is thankful for them; and of course, he sits back and watches as they start showing off how much they adore her. xx

[yridenergyridenergy]

On the eve of the seven-year mark for this account, let's address the biggest hate point about me: how I insist that people either ask before, come and say thanks, simply link to or credit this page when they share/repost the content.

Even if I manage to convince a handful of peopIe, I will continually have to argue and work with people on this because it's not inherent. For example, I come from an online community where, decades ago, we were shocked when we learned that Japanese artists were mad that some people had simply copied and pasted their fanart. It's obvious when you stop to put yourself in their shoes, but for a lot of people, it takes some personal effort to accept the realization that: "Oh okay, I see where you're coming from." In no way am I comparing fanart with most of my content, as artists deserve a ton more praise, but the concept of being grateful for where you got stuff and not simply saving and reposting stuff is the same. And guess what? People outside of that aforementioned community, and even probably newcomers to that community, are still sharing uncredited fanart. It's not inherent, I get it.

For almost seven years, I have posted twice daily, at least, and this requires quite a lot of budget, time, innovation and effort. And absolutely, the content comes from the band themselves, I'm not the photographer(s), the live show recorders, the interviewers, etc. However, you also wouldn't have that GIF, JPG, etc. if it wasn't for me. I do it to share the love, the passion. If I don't mention the source in my post, then it's either directly cited on the picture or the band has not mentioned the source either, like for memocas.

Also, each perpetrator thinks of themselves individually, but imagine my perspective too: it's not just one, but dozens of people who keep reposting my content to their own crowd of followers without any context. When you don't mention a source and just display new content out of nowhere, you are indeed claiming it as if you were the benefactor.

So, am I fighting for the "clout" or whatever? Well, maybe in the same capacity as those people are clearly attracted to. Whether we are or not, it's just about the principle behind the whole situation that reposting is not the proper way to show that you are grateful about something. Unless it came from a robot or some big corporation without feelings or humanity. If you don't wish to interact and ask permission or say thanks at all, let alone like or reblog on Tumblr, then the least you can do is to mention where you found stuff. To whom you owe the pleasure of having seen that content and being able to share it.

And it's so stupid because on Twitter, for example, you benefit from 280 characters now, plus a link gives a preview of the images that are on the landing site. There is zero excuse for not mentioning your source right there in the post where you repost an image (or screenshots of a translated interview, mindblowingly enough), in addition to whatever small comment you want to make regarding the content, instead of in a subsequent reply that nobody will bother to check.

A lot of people will still disagree on this and hate me, and that's fine. If you don't like me, then don't engage with what I share, because that's just hypocritical. This really shouldn't be that controversial, it's just that your feathers are temporarily ruffled. People added watermarks on their GIFs and scans etc. way before I did.

And the descent from "Please credit if you repost" to "Do not repost" came because people didn't do even that anyway. But if someone comes to ask me if they can nevertheless, I'm super likely to say 'yes'.

At the end of the day, I want to keep this blog positive, I want to foster a good environment to lift people's mood day by day. We have enough bullshit in our lives. I've heard of the Dir en grey community being toxic at probably more than one stage of its existence, but hopefully we can keep avoiding that.

As for me, I am eternally grateful to those who keep up with my apparently insufferable self.

[olderthannetfic]

When m/m writers say "women DNI / don't read" on a platform like here or AO3 that's majority female, what's the thinking behind this? Are they insecure in their masculinity and trying to preemptively block fujo cooties from getting on their fiction? Are they trying to meet people for RP or dating through engagement with their fics? That I can maybe understand. But if it's the former, there's a culture mismatch. "Women DNI" writers mostly aren't writing stuff that's popular on Space Battles, Sufficient Velocity, Royal Road or even ff.net, which gets more of the "malebrained" (sorry) game nerd stuff with sexless shonen-like characters levelling up or solving problems with "hard magic." Those spaces also have a concrit culture where you can be a little mean and mocking, and the "women DNIs" only want praise and clout. It always makes me think of Married with Children and Al Bundy's NO MA'AM (National Organization of Men Against Amazonian Masterhood) club.

Anyway, it's extra odd when I see this kind of clout goblinry in a market context where most of the sales are to women. I've seen gay dudes (cis and trans) lightly threaten that a big conversation about what gets popular in paying m/m space was coming soon (spoiler: it never came). And it's always someone who doesn't have the kind of career they want despite doing lots of marketing. I think it's OK to vent, but the gay men who are doing numbers in m/m space don't threaten women's careers or disparage their own readership.

--

Are they insecure in their masculinity and trying to preemptively block fujo cooties from getting on their fiction?

Yes.

No, really. That's it.

Ask any trans man who's been on T for a few years and has supportive friends and family what he thinks about this dumb behavior vs. a scared trans boy who just figured it out in his own head and whose entire experience of living openly as a man is being rude to strangers on twitter.

The pro version is just professional jealousy.

If Jordan L. Hawk can come out and stay at the top of the heap (despite, sorry not sorry, a bit of a career slump lately due to Life), so can other trans dudes, and there are plenty of cis dudes who write in a BLy style and sell just fine to BL/slash fandom type readers.

Dudes who are secure don't need to pull this shit, and good marketers know not to insult their paying customers in public because it's bad for business.

TBH, when I find out a m/m author is a guy, I'll usually try one of his books. I don't think fujoshi culture is ~appropriation~, but i guess I do think it's nice to give a guy a shot. I have pretty universally been underwhelmed (in the Sturgeon's Law way, not the men can't write way). But I doubt I'm alone in this behavior. A dude who's not a whiny little bitch about having a chick audience can use this to his marketing advantage. Instead, a lot of losers want to shoot themselves in the foot.

[gvftea]

If you just wanna attack the guys over every thing they do, why the fuck are you a fan? Go find another band to be creepily parasocial with and leave the rest of us to our “problematic” faves. I am so serious about this, either shut the fuck up or just leave.

Despite your months of wailing about Palestine on Twitter you still camped for barricade and I didn’t see ONE of you performative bitches (LOOKING AT YOU SHAY! 😉) on barricade holding up a sign in support of Palestine, asking them to speak up where the band would’ve seen it face-to-face.. why? Because that would’ve diminished your IRL interaction with them and derailed your delusional attempt at a y/n moment. You can hide behind your PFP and Twitter handle but sure as fuck won’t back anything up when there’s a chance to do it face-to-face.. because God forbid Josh read your sign and not give you a fucking rose. 🥀 They never spoke up about Palestine, despite you calling them out for months. You’re still here…

FUCKING LEAVE

They’re still associating and in relationships with people that you bitch and whine and complain about nonstop. People that you have confidently labeled as bad people. Last I checked, you are the company you keep. So obviously, that must speak volumes about the guys’ character. So why continue to support them?

FUCKING LEAVE

Josh hugs and kisses a few fans on barricade and y’all lose your fucking minds, calling him a predator and comparing him to a fucking pedophile. What the fuck is wrong with you people? If you feel that you need to make that comparison, what the fuck are you doing here? How the fuck can you come out with that shit and still be a fan? So he’s being creepy and kissing fans without (what YOU consider to be) proper consent and yet you’re still here supporting him and the rest of the band?? Are you fucking serious? If I felt that any member of a band I supported was sexually assaulting fans (cause sexual assault is what you were describing in your tweets) I would stop supporting them immediately. Not publicly whine about Josh’s actions and how badly they triggered me and made me feel so unsafe in the fandom, but then turn around and still gush about how much I love the band. Be so fucking for real.

FUCKING LEAVE

Now you’re turning on Josh about cultural appropriation (yet again) for including a fans sign in a photo dump. And most of ya’ll are white bitches with no ties to the indigenous community yelping like you were personally victimized by a photo of a sign. At what point will you finally fucking acknowledge that they are not living up to the stupidly lofty ideals you’re holding them to and find yourself a band that aces your purity tests?

JUST FUCKING LEAVE

It’s exhausting watching you attack the band over and over and over again for miniscule crumbs of Internet clout cause you don’t have shit going on in your real life. And let’s be honest, that’s all it is, a performative circle jerk of outrage ya’ll are acting out for each other. Every time one of your self made dramas blows over you initiate a new one within a week cause you can’t seem to survive without something to rage at the band about. I don’t blame the guys for going as far underground as they can when they are on hiatus. They are in an abusive relationship with their alleged “fans”. No matter what they have going on you always find shit to nitpick and attack and bitch about. And if you’re not attacking the members of the band, you’re attacking each other. I’ve never seen any band have such a miserable bunch of cunts for fans. What is it that keeps you around? I genuinely would like to know because it seems like you truly hate the members of the band. They can never do anything right yet you won’t just leave them in peace to the rest of the fans that actually want to support them. I fucking implore you, next time you feel like you want to get on your little soapbox and call out the band for whatever imagined slight you’ve conjured, how about you just cut your losses and walk away from the fandom instead?

[keepthedelta]

Maybe I'm being overly cynical (I Do Not know these people and this is just my outsider view), but the whole 'Piastri family social media' stuff has made me uncomfortable from the start because (to me) it gives off huge 'chasing clout and followers by using my famous family member'

None of them were particularly active social media posters before, none of them had an interest in influencing or building a career from it. But, suddenly now Oscar is more popular they are posting A Lot. (For comparison, someone like Max's sister has definitely used her brother to her advantage in gaining a following and popularity, but, she also seemingly always had an interest in fashion and makeup and having a career in it + her posts are not about Max/F1 directly)

It's only going to cause headache and pain and sorry, if my brother was famous, I would not want to even remotely see people thirst trapping him or shipping him romantically with people. Why would you invite that into your space. Also, if I was on Oscar's PR team I'd be fucking worried because what happens if your mother or sister says/posts something that is controversial or actually bad. That now will have a huge audience and actually affect how people see Oscar, and he will be obligated to comment on it. And, if he doesn't, it will be to his detriment (See Max and the Piquet family)

Obviously, fans should just act fucking normally, but we all know that isn't how things work on the internet. You sometimes have to take steps yourself to avoid getting into those situations.

see i personally don't view it as them using him for clout because i think that it is at minimum a symbiotic relationship from which they both benefit. i am a long time hater of the piastri family socials, but i have disliked it because in my personal opinion oscar's family are being used as fodder for his pr.

you say they weren't really active before oscar's career in f1 but even if they are seeking to become influencers etc. which i cannot confirm or deny because i don't know them and frankly have no interest in them, the main reason imo that they did become more active was for oscar. it seems as though his pr is very much trying to portray him as a normal, down to earth relatable kind of guy. a gen z kimi raikkonen who is very calm and level headed (even if he's nothing like kimi, nor honestly is kimi like that). and it benefits oscar (and by extension his pr team) for him to have a cool mum who says funny things on twitter and cool young sisters interested in kpop etc. who aren't impressed by him. his image benefits from the "normal family guy" aesthetic.

there's a reason dts wanted to film him having breakfast with his family. his family has become a part of his media strategy. his mother goes on podcasts or whatever as part of his pr strategy. she is there to talk about him and to promote him without it seeming like promotion. you think if oscar or his team didn't want that she would still have gone on? i don't. that's not to say she's being disingenuous or inauthentic, but i'm sure someone went through roughly what media narrative they wanted to tell and how she should tell it. they are part of oscar's media strategy. they're there to make people think that he's normal and just some guy who happens to be an exceptionally talented driver.

i don't know if his family are benefitting from his fame or to what extent they may be but it's not oscar who should be worried about fan response to his family, it's them. they are being used as a proxy personality for him (and i know that sounds mean but it's not intended as criticism of oscar himself) and at some point things are going to get nasty. what happens if oscar and lando get into an actual wdc title fight at some point? what happens if the chirlies or cultLH turn on him and his fans? oscar has the protection of being a famous f1 driver. his family don't. people will send death threats to his sisters or turn up at his mum's house. they'll search through everything they've ever posted looking for a miniscule detail to cancel them over and justify their hatred and abuse.

everyone involved in this, oscar, his family, his pr team, mclaren, their pr team, needs to recognise that enabling these parasocial relationships, letting people think of oscar's mum as their friend or mum figure, letting people think it's okay to send his sister rpf as though she's their friend is not acceptable. there do need to be boundaries (frankly i think that all f1 drivers need much stricter boundaries than they currently have because some fan behaviour is worrying. people have already shown up at charles's house this is not a worst case scenario it's already happening) for the safety of everyone involved.

i do also think there's something to be said about fan culture and the increasing entitlement to a public figure's life. as fans i think we all need to be a lot more respectful of these people, whether they're famous or simply connected to someone famous. at the end of the day they are people and should be granted basic respect and privacy because they are people. we do not know them, we are not friends with them. how we feel about them should have no bearing on their lives.

but public figures personal lives are increasingly being used for promotional purposes and i think they need to recognise that they are feeding the entitlement and aggression of fans when they do that. the reason why fans get more and more demanding is because people keep offering up more of themselves and their families for promotion. and i think that needs to stop before someone gets hurt.

[silvyysthings]

I'm sorry for all the Charmies.

I quote this: "this timothée being a hoe is bringing the community back together LMAOOO" from some stan here on Tumblr, as I was lazy to get back to Twitter to quote the stans there, and I wanted a real example. And of course, they watch every little word we say in our corner, and they get mad and start attacking Charmies. 

They say this is their sense of humor, but honestly, tell me how many times every one of us has seen these jokes from Twitter stans. Their humor is as funny and original as a loaf of bread.

They would rather, as "fans", have random people use Tim's name for clout and make fun of him because they fetishize the idea of having sex with him. And they wonder why Timmy no longer interacts with them on the internet.

Please, don't believe us. This fandom has survived every era of herd of stans that comes every couple of years, being mad at our mere existence, and still watches every move of this fandom. We own you. 🐶

😏😏 💯

instead of thinking about us they should dwell on the smallness of what they have in common. Keep talking about us because I assure you that in this little world of ours we don't even give you a thought 😂

this also applies to all the anons that I have in my inbox who begin their asks with "you charmies"... I don't even consider your existence so I don't even read you 😂

[clydeznuts]

GIVE ME CLOUT NOW

im on twitter (or X idk)