#tw;;suicidemention
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brknmnds · 1 year ago
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@edhellfire asked:
❛ i am the devil, and i am here to do the devil’s work. ❜
"What you going to kill me?" Henry question as he looked up at his brother-in-law. Ever since the incident he had been locked up in Juniper Hill, most of the time being completely out of it due to the drugs they pumped into him to keep him calm.
He wasn't that day as it was a day where he was allowed out to see how he would cope with being re-introduced into normal living. He wasn't allowed to leave either his sister or her husband's sight and if he came under any duress then he was to be returned to Juniper Hill.
"go ahead, it's better than what I go through on a daily basis." He said to him, his voice, void of emotion. The only reason he never did was because of Olivia but she didn't need him anymore. That much was clear.
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neurodivergentcutie · 1 year ago
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TW: SI
I’m suicidal for the first time in almost 2 years.
I don’t see many reasons left to hang on. I’m suffocating.
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realmofthedragon · 2 months ago
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"She hates me... She said she doesn't love me and I am no son of hers." He said as he collapsed on the couch. His mother had told him this plenty of times, but it was always when he fucked up but this time he hadn't done anything. He was trying to be good, for his new wife, sure he still drank but that was nothing compare to what he had done for years. "I don't even know what I did this time."
He was in a deep, dark pit of depression. he felt worthless knowing that his own family felt so little of him. Sometimes, he wondered what he would be like to throw himself off his old bedrooms window. Would people mourn him? would people care? He very much doubted it, but he knew he wouldn't be able to do it. He was weak. So he kept on living and the only thing good to come out of it was Penelope.
"She will not talk about it, she will push it aside and carry on with life. I understand that she doesn't love me. My whole family doesn't but it still hurts to hear."
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Penelope had great sympathy for her husband-- but she knew he had done horrible things none the less. She heard the rumors-- but he had never been harsh with her, from time to time he spoke in anger but she knew it was never meant for her, it just landed in her lap due to proximity to him. So she forgave him and little by little she was working to help him direct his emotions into more helpful means than lashing out.
"I suppose it depends on what we are eating, I would not advise being undressed for soup-- seems like a terrible idea" she kept her hand in his own as they made their way down the hall. Once at their room the guards opened their door and she sent their maids to fetch the large tub and fill it, and asked for their dinner to be brought here as well.
"Your sister's wedding is next week, perhaps once it has passed your mother will calm and we can better speak to her about the issues that plague the two of you?" The redhead suggested as she lead him to the small couch that resided in their room.
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that-one-tea-addict · 4 years ago
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If you have TikTok, please be cautious if this happens to you. And for the love of whatever you believe in, TELL SOMEONE IF THIS HAPPENS TO YOU!!!
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uremoluvr · 4 years ago
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s0m30n3 r3bl0gg3d my p0st 4nd f0ll0w3d m3 wh3n:
- th3y 4r3 NSFW (n0t th31r f4ult s1nc3 1 d1dnt m3nt10n th4t 1m 4 m1n0r)
- th3y r3bl0g sc3n3 stuff but m4d3 fun 0f sc3n3 k1ds
- th3y t0ld s0m30n3 to k*LL th3ms3lv3s????
l0ng st0ry sh0rt, th3y r bl0ck3d
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1-800-suicidetrippin · 6 years ago
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Honestly I’m surprised I haven’t killed myself 
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2queer2function-22 · 7 years ago
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my life is so so different than I ever thought it would be rn. I dropped out of college(for now) due to health. Went back to being gin severe pain. Am still sick. Have a port in my chest. Live with my ex therapists daughter who is now one of my best friends, live in a city, don't have a job, am getting to know a hella cute girl, and to be honest I’m pretty damn happy except for the pain and the anxiety. Im not complaining though. A year and 2 months ago I tried to take my own life. My therapist at the time saved my life. I may or may not have been okay if she had not driven me to the hospital immediately but i took 1800mg of Cymbalta....thats a fuck ton. I spent weeks, months, almost a year being heartbroken from the changes that occurred during that time. I held anger in my heart, resentment, worry. Its all gone. And in its place is so much growth. A year and 2 months ago I couldn't say I was self harm free, or that I was (somewhat) in control of my emotions/moods, or that I could allow myself to cry when I needed to, the tears just falling freely down my cheeks. 
I have grown. I have blossomed. My life may be the exact opposite of what I imagined it to be at age 20 but I am fucking working on myself and welcoming healthier people into my life. The woman I wanted to badly to be my mom is now my roommates/best friends mom and still in my life even when I thought she wouldn't be. Things happen as they should and I am so incredibly grateful for my life. 
and thank you K, for making sure I stayed here on this Earth <3
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entrywaytofixation · 7 years ago
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I’m terrified because my mood patterns are so intense and unstable that I might actually end up killing myself; in that moment suicide seems to be the only solution. I have been so close so many times. If I didn’t want to spare my dad finding my lifeless body I would have slit my wrists months ago. I don’t wanna die, but I have no control over my actions when my mood switches. My bpd is eating me alive.
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hole-milks-blog · 7 years ago
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Wow
I made it guys. I turn 19 today. I loved passed my 17th birthday. I'm graduating highschool. I survived my depression. I did what a lot of my friends couldn't do. I'm gonna keep living and fighting. For everyone For my self. I did it.
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bimbo-bear · 8 years ago
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Hey I'm okay y'all
I haven't been on Tumblr and probably won't be on tumblr much for a while because I'm recovering, but I was briefly hospitalized because I attempted suicide. Don't worry though, I'm okay now and I'm getting the help I need. I have a lot of resources to help me get better, and I'm doing fine.
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neurodivergentcutie · 1 year ago
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I guess I don’t want to k*ll myself anymore. But I am having strong self h*rm urges. I miss the blood.
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Tonight,
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I contemplated suicide. Not for myself, but for others. Those that think about their death daily. As I sat in the tub, I thought it through. It would be so easy to do. To just relax and lower my face below the water, breathe it in, go peacefully. I thought about all the things I wouldn't have to worry about anymore. The stressors in my life, they would all be gone, mean nothing to me.
Then I thought about my family and friends. My mom's face when she came to check on me and saw my lifeless body floating in the water. How she would blame herself for not checking on me sooner, her thinking that maybe she could've saved me. The rest of my family and friend's faces when they heard the news. My death plastered all over social media. I wondered how many people would come to the funeral, or maybe just the visitation. I thought about the afterlife. If God would forgive me since I've been saved, or if Hell awaited me.
I thought about all the good things in my life and how they outweigh the bad. I thought about all the events I would miss. Babies being born, birthday parties, graduations, marriages. I thought about if I ended my life tonight, I would have no future. No career, no car, no house, no husband, no children. My timeline would end, exactly where it is tonight, before it had really even began.
And then I thought, how could anyone truly want to kill themselves? How could someone not see all the potential they have in life? That things will get better? And I realised that I had never been pushed that far. I've only ever had people build me up in life, and me build up others. Some people don't have that privilege. They get abused at home, then go to school or work and get abused there. A never ending cycle of physical, mental, and emotional abuse. Others have a chemical imbalance that makes their brain think and their heart feel terrible things. To those people, dying is better than anything they can see in their future. We should all have the right to be built up by those around us, to feel loved by others, and feel safe. Not everyone has that.
So, from now on, I will be a light in the darkness that is this crazy, messed up world. I will continue to support others no matter the differences we have or face, as long as those decisions aren't harmful to the person involved. I will always be there for someone when they need me. I will not judge or discriminate against anyone, because I don't know their situation.
I contemplated suicide tonight, and no one should ever have to.
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yike-city · 8 years ago
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Some characters for a (superhero?) webcomic that’s currently is currently in the works! (and yes those names were intentional, their Mom was kind of obsessed with Edgar Allan Poe’s poetry as a poet herself and didn’t miss the naming opportunity when it arose. 
If you can’t read my awful handwriting here’s some fun facts:
Edgar
- Loves to remind people how awful the world is 24/7 (pessimist 101%)
- Face is stuck like this because of how impossible it is to express his constant agony.
- Black shirt with white stripes.
- Cries self to sleep.
- Is 25 years old and he still shares a bed with his “twin” brother.
- Can erase matter (kinda)
- Constantly haunted by his deceased triplet shit boy Allan
Allan
- Most average, boring and shitty (@ everything) / Dead
- Rarely mentioned in the comic due to his untimely death
- Super allergic to nuts
- The middle triplet but was never recognized as such due to him not being identical to his brothers/suffers from poliosis (he was born with black hair, unlike his siblings)
- Constantly forgotten about 24/7
- Outwardly cheeky idiot who makes too many jokes and acts kinda like a smart ass despite not appearing all too s ma rt
- Inwardly wishes he wasn’t born at all and refuses to acknowledge his own self-worth.
- Pretended to hate any of the dares he was getting from his brothers in a game of truth or dare and dared himself to chug a jar of peanut butter. His brothers were too busy arguing over what to do to actually save him. 
- No one knows his death was intentional suicide, they all think he was just being really stupid
- Almost eaten in the womb/shorter then his brothers by 1/2 inch
- Occasionally haunts his siblings. 
Poe
- Mary Poppins nanny bag of positive cheesy quotes and facts 101% optimist
- POSITIVE-ly annoying with his excessive positivity, he can see the bright side in any situation but sometimes it’s really not what people wanna hear.
-  Super naive and stubborn.
- Horrible resting bitch face/has very mild expressions
- Stays up all night consoling Edgar so he always has tired/droopy looking eyes.
- White shirt/black stripes.
- Used excessive originally fake optimism to help cope with his brother's death until eventually he “faked it until he made it” and just became an over the top optimist.
- Can create matter (more or less) 
- Youngest triplet but taller than the rest by 1/2 inch.
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that-one-tea-addict · 4 years ago
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ALL IM SAYING is you might lose a limb if you bully someone into trying to off themselves. Lose more than that if you continue after (if) they succeed. I’m done playing games.
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kawaiiknives · 7 years ago
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I would add to keep in mind the cultural context this subculture was born out of and to respect it being a Japanese fashion. Menhera emerged out of unique circumstance and a specific cultural back ground that is rooted in mental health / suicide in Japan being stigmatized and taboo and not having accssess to mental health services. I hope the fashion can serve as a way to cope with mental health or even just appreciate it. But this subculture is so much more than an aesthetic to the people who started it. It is activism. It is community. It is breaking the silence in non verbal ways by telling their stories through fashion. Co-oping /appropriating styles like this can happen. But I also think people if well researched can respectfully participate too. Please please be mindful if anyone out there wants to dress in menhera. Also I totally think appreciating cultures from a far is cool too. We don't have to insert our selves in everything just BC we are drawn to it. (P.s) this is more of an add on not necessarily a reply to the persons question above I think people who are neurodivergent and ppl with physical disabilities can totally use fashion like this to build solidarity. This is my opinion as a Japanese person who has dealt with PTSD / depression ~ I also just wrote a 30 pg. research paper about suicide/mental in Japan (and also focus on menhera fashion for a good portion) so if anyone has questions feel free to message me I lots of resources !
Question: is it ok if I like Menhera if I don't have any mental diagnosis but I have physical (like my HLHS) it's helped me get over my fear of needles and yearly hospital visits to the cardiologist. tysm!
Answer:
Of course! The answer to your question is similar to what I answered for this one: ( https://menhera-tips.tumblr.com/post/169400095595/question-ive-gotten-interested-in-menhera-but-i ) but yes! Menhera is a style that should give you so much courage and it’s great that this fashion style can help you!
Menhera is for everyone except just don’t forget that since the style is based of mental illness, the motifs you include in your coordinates should keep that in mind (aka not excessive gore otherwise you are now wearing pastel gore instead menhera motifs are needles (as you stated), pills, and things that would have to do with a mental illness) but from what you said, it seems you got that all down! ;3 Once again though, your clothing choices should make you feel brave and fearless. Own it! ;D
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battling-my-demons · 6 years ago
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Tw: suicidementioned, self-harm mentioned,
I know people say that some people don't see the signs of depression and suicidal thoughts. I know my friends, family, and school counselor didn't. My "friends " would get mad and annoyed at me for saying things like "I'm tired" or "this is so hard that I want to die". My own friend called me horrible names. My own friends left me. You know what sucks more, my one friend literally saw blood and a handmade bandage. She asked what happened and I said nothing. She never even thought about it again. My other friend that I had known 14 years saw my family at its worst and saw everything. I actually did tell her that I wanted to jump out of my mom's car while she was driving. I actually told her I wanted to die and she didn't do or say anything. A couple years later, she just stopped talking to me or answering my calls even after she made plans to hang out.
To make the long story short, I did actually say i wanted to kill myself when I was in high school and still no one did anything. I know people can see signs of depression and suicide. It is so easy to spot sometimes! I know my signs were obvious in my high school photos. I looked so miserable. I looked like I wanted to die and no one did anything!
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