#turns out this thing is basically a baby
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Aurelionite
#risk of rain#risk of rain 2#aurelionite#risk of rain fanart#turns out this thing is basically a baby#beetledoesart#pencil art#artists on tumblr#traditional artist#beetle does art
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
ALSO if prisoners could get educated then prisons could run themselves more reliably and function like communities which is conducive to a growing/healing/learning/absolving mindset
#sorry i just have so many opinions on prison abolition thanks to being the child of a prisoner#former prisoner#tho prison basically ruined his life forever and now he's a crazy old man#what did he go to prison for?? a few things but most damning was when we has like 19-22 or something he stole a car to impress a girl#he also lit it on fire which I will admit is worse but#a 19 year old kid (who got kicked out at 16 mind you) just trying to impress a girl and he went to prison for basically his whole 20s#he did uh. he did actually allegedly escape at one point but my aunt turned him back in. snitch#anyway yeah#i was born when he was 34 and like a handful of years if not months out at most#i was an accident rebound baby but then he ended up being a single father lmfao#said it taught him more than prison ever could#if you read all these tags that turned into a rant have a cookie
173 notes
·
View notes
Note
Bless that trophy wife anon because they’re right. There’s no way mindscape citizens see whatever dipper does in the real world as a real career and he has no job in bill’s realm either, whether he likes it or not he’s entwined with bill’s world and his people and he can’t blame them for thinking his job is being bill’s husband.
That’s what pisses him off, the fact that they’re right.
No matter how Dipper protests that yes, he DOES have a job, the beings in the Fearamid don't believe it's 'real', or worse - humor him, then give Knowing Looks to the other demons in the room.
Meanwhile, Bill knows it's real - but sometimes he plays along like it isn't just to piss Dipper off.
#answers#Oh of COURSE it's great that you're keeping busy sweetie!!#I'm sure this..... 'hero' thing is pretty. Um. Interesting!!#All the while clearly Not Getting It in the same way tech-illiterate grandparents don't believe the Internet has Careers#Demons give negative shits about human life on average#When said lives are basically a point on a scorecard devoting your own to Improving them is very much an eyebrow raising 'job' choice#Dipper might as well be talking about his own personal MMO for all that they care about the 'points' he's scored or any of the 'characters'#Bill's smarter and gets that it's a serious gig - but he's also a very infuriating spouse at times#It's a good thing he has other qualities or he'd be intolerable#Some would even say he is even WITH his supposed 'positive' traits!#Sadly Dipper has very bad taste in men and loves the hell out of him anyway#Also the demons *do* have a point#Technically Bill's bankrolling all the magic you're using in your career Dipper#Even if it IS a real job you're still a bit of a sugar baby#Watch Dipper throw a fit and go no-magic for a time just to Prove Them Wrong#This in turn upsets Bill who's not thrilled about all the close calls to his husband's life#If Dipper weren't so stupid CLEVER about it he'd be furious!!#Now Bill's all conflicted with 'stupid not to use all the advantages and NEARLY DYING' and 'ah crap that was smart as hell and SUPER hot'#Overall leaving him very >:(
132 notes
·
View notes
Text
I have decided that i will get out of my comfort zone and actually make a fleshed out Strollonso AU. This idea has been plaguing my mind for a while so i feel like sharing it. ✌️
Its a Stripper!Lance x Bouncer!Fernando AU where Fernando is a gruff security guard at a night club located on the outskirts of the city and Lance is one of the dancers in said night club.
Fernando has sworn to never get infatuated with one of the dancers but when Lance arrives it has him fighting with his own morals. Lance is only there to escape from the pressure of his personal life, has the freedom to be himself, but when he’s on stage and sees Fernando standing there watching him he feels the need to impress him with his moves.
It starts off slow but progressively gets more heated when Fernando starts to give in to temptation and finally lets Lance take him into one of the private rooms. 🤭
Some characterizations i made at 3 am last night:
Lance (24) Son of rich entrepreneur and car salesman Lawrence Stroll. In line to take over the company and is placed in a business school to learn the basics. Hardly goes to class. Skips to hang out with his best friend Esteban. Due to the stress and responsibilities his father places on him, at night he has found escape in being a stripper at the downtown night club where he can feel alive, wild and free. Only Esteban knows he does this. Stage name is Lancey Angel.
Fernando (43) Former bodyguard for Lawrence Stroll. Took care of Lance for a bit before he got fired due to an intense argument with Lawrence. Lance does not remember him cause he was still very young when he got fired. Been a bouncer ever since Lewis agree to hire him at his night club. Mainly guards the middle area and the stage. Immediately recognizes Lance as soon as gets hired, knows that Lance probably doesn’t remember him, but when he sees him dancing up on stage Fernando goes through hell in this mind. All he knows is that Lance is beautiful and should be protected. Personally volunteers to escort Lance to his car after Lance’s shift is over. Mentored the other bouncers Max and Carlos.
Esteban (29) Best friend of Lance. Works at a car garage and fixes rich peoples car. Hates the people but geeks over the cars they bring to him. Allows Lance to bug him while he works cause telling him to stop skipping class is a fruitless endeavor. Helps with the business school work Lance brings to him. Covers for Lance when he goes to the night club and tells Lawrence “he was with me the whole night” etc.
Other main dancers:
Charles: (26) Stage name is Lord Perceval. The prettiest and most requested one. Gets the most amount of money but is the most tired after every shift. The others are either jealous or feel sorry for him most the time. Lance likes to gossip with him in French. Max and Carlos fight for his attention and throw hands every time Charles asks someone to escort him to his car after a shift.
Lewis: (39) Stage name is Sir Lewis. The veteran and basically the boss of the nightclub. Started out as just a dancer but had to step up when the previous boss just abandoned the place one day. Wanted the dancers to still have jobs so he took over to help them. If a guest in the club is making the dancers feel uncomfortable they go to him and either he takes care of them or has Fernando take care of them. Had a fling with Fernando in the past but things ended badly, now they can’t stand each other, and only interact if it’s work related.
Alex: (28) Stage name is Alexander Allure. The most sweetest and kindest soul. Is always there to lift the other dancers self esteems up when they start to feel insecure. Lance has been in the presence of his encouraging words a couple of times. At the same time being the most kinkiest of them all. Has a whole different side of him he brings out in the private rooms. Stories of his raunchy escapades with guests in those rooms dont match the soft person that Lance is familiar with.
Logan (23) Stage name is America’s Sweetheart (Sweetheart for short). The youngest and newly added member of the club. Came in a month after Lance and is being trained by Alex. Very shy but overcame stage fright thanks to Alex. Doesn’t do the private rooms yet. Is the one Lance feels most comfortable talking with because Logan is going through the whole “getting away from all the pressure and responsibilities put in place by someone” thing so they bond over that.
Other bouncers:
Carlos (29) Fernando’s second in command. Usually handles the entrance and checks the people coming into the club. Inside he guards around the entrances and tables around that area. Very handsome so drunk patrons try to flirt with him all the time. Has his eyes on Charles and goes into the back to talk with him on his breaks.
Max (26) The strongest and the most hardworking of the three. When he was hired he simply just brought in supplies and inventory for the club. Fernando noticed how easily he lifted up the heavy boxes and got everything done in record time, so Fernando offered him a bouncer job cause he saw potential in him and thought he’d do good. Guards the back of the bar and around the private rooms. Also has his eyes on Charles and goes into the back to talk with him on his breaks.
Other people of note:
Lando (24) Dj of the club. Announces the dancers names in the most frat boy-ey way possible. Always succeeds in hyping the crowd up. Plays the most outrageously loud music and is so oblivious that everyone in the club thinks he’s going deaf.
Valtteri (35) Bartender of the club. Chillest dude in that entire building. Longtime friend of Lewis and you’ll always find Lewis sitting at the bar chatting away with him when he’s on break.
Zhou (24) Server of the club. Valtteri’s little buddy and helping hand around the bar. Usually very efficient in getting drinks to the guests but can occasionally get a bit clumsy. Fernando had to chime in one time and kick dude’s ass cause he wanted to fight Zhou over a little mistake. Has looked up to Fernando ever since.
#these are just the basics of it but i kinda got everything set for the story and how things will turn out#babies first AU basically#hope it sounds interesting enough 😭#strollonso#au
56 notes
·
View notes
Text
Just saw a picture of divine dragon chung myung before he got that title and it really hit me how small Cho Sam's body was when chung myung came back. This little thought has spoilers for chapter 400+ (I think anyway) and vague spoilers for everything past ch 400 until like. Ch 800
GOD OK so we as the reader understand chung myungs situation very very intimately. WE understand that he is an 80+ year old man mentally. WE understand that he is not in fact 15, then 17, then 19, 20, etc. Everyone around him, however, truly believe that he is those ages.
It's brushed upon multiple times throughout the novel, especially whenever chung myung is down for the count/recovering after a fight. The facade he makes around himself, the strong reliable leader, fades away and the "truth" of who he is reinstates itself to those close to him in this second life. His back, every time he wavers, is described as small. This is always through the perspective of anyone but himself. This is even more apparent whenever he is unconscious after a serious fight. I don't know exactly chapters, but i KNOW that baek cheon (and the rest of the 5 swords plus soso and hye yeon), at least once, has had the reality of Chung myungs apparent age dawn upon them. That they're youngest sajae (sahyung in soso's case) is constantly spilling his own blood to protect them. (This fact is straight up said by yu iseol after the particularly bad fight with Jang ilso, spitting her frustration with only getting in chung myungs way instead of protecting him).
This phenomenon is hardly limited to the main group of disciples. After the first myriad men siege on Mount hua (while The Gang is in Xian), everyone subconsciously gains courage with the thought that soon enough chung myung will come, that he'll protect them. The disciples (soso being the most prevalent since she's one of the main disciples focused on in the novel) of course correct this thought, realizing that they cannot rely on chung myung forever. Anyways moving on from just describing this arc. What I mainly want to focus on is Hyun jong and chung myungs interaction AFTER the siege is finished, after un gum is fresh off of his amputation, after chung myung has barely gotten treatment for his own (quite serious) injuries.
What do you think when through Hyun jong's mind, seeing his youngest disciple, the one who brought back the hope that had almost died out with his sect, ruthlessly kill the enemy, return heavily wounded, and then try to sneak out almost immediately to go back to smite those who have harmed his home? To us, Chung myung is more than capable. He's the plum blossom sword Saint, the one who (even with all the regret he holds over this) severed the head of the heavenly demon. He's an 80+ year old man trying to protect the only thing besides bloodshed that is familiar in this second life. We understand the guilt he has over not being able to protect his home the first time. We understand that he would rather die than allow Mount Hua to fall again.
Hyun jong does not know this. He does not understand chung myungs rage (and guilt and grief and longing and-). He looks at chung myung and sees an 18 or 19 (I don't remember) year old boy, covered in wounds, trying to sneak out of his home on a suicide mission of revenge. He sees a boy. He knows that if he let's this boy go, he will never see him alive again. So he uses chung myungs borderline (who are we kidding, it is way past borderline) unhealthy loyalty with mount hua to dissuade him from walking to his death.
ANYWAYS long story not so short, I need need need more analysis over what everyone but chung myung thinks about him. Everyone sees this young teen, then young adult, bend over backwards to the point where he has almost died so so so many times just so mount hua can flourish. They've seen him kill ruthlessly, they've seen him sob over the skeleton of an ancestor (one of his brothers, a reminder of what he has lost, what he will never get back), they've seen him silly and carefree, they've seen him almost mad with bloodlust.
To us, he is chung myung, the old plum blossom sword Saint, slayer of the heavenly demon. To them, he is chung myung, the scrawny 15 year old that changed their lives, that faces unknown traumas, that has had a life so, so unkind to him.
Sometimes I look at chung myung pre time skip, how small he is, how he looks like a child, how he acts nothing like one, and remember that only we, the readers, get the full context behind his actions.
#ANYWAYS#this turned out to be uh. not so small.#but no i saw 15 yr old chung myung and went#wow he really does look like a baby#and then my thoughts went WILD#i know this is kind of just like. a summery of a few different parts of the novel#and i kjnd repeat myself a lot#but i read a fic a whole ago that kind of touches on this whole conceot#i Do Not remeber what its called#but its basically the mount hua elders discussing things#and then chung myung is brought up#and all of them are like#wow this kid has obviously been through some shit. life has NOT been kind to him#but uh no yeah#sometimes i forget that the people of mount hua do NOT have the same context we do#and in place of the chung myung we see#they see a very very traumatized and scarily capable teen/young adult#and they dont know WHY HE ACTS LIKE THAT#but yeah hope this kinda makes sense#this novel makes me sick#return of the blossoming blade#rotmhs#return of the mount hua sect#analysis
79 notes
·
View notes
Text
I had been worried that cutting my dad off and distancing myself from him would put me in a difficult position with his side of the family but I've actually reconnected with a couple family members over how shitty he's been and it turns out I'm not the first one to stop talking to him, he's been blocked by like two of my aunts And my cousin
#my cousin texted me out of nowhere yesterday and we've been chatting which has been really nice#and I asked her like btw did my dad send you to talk to me and shes like oh God no I haven't talked to him since he got drunk and rampaged#and I was like oh which time and she's like the one a couple months ago and I was like ayy me too lmao#so! turns out the only person who is straining and breaking familial relationships is him 🤔#not that he'll ever see the pattern that his sister and aunt and two of his nieces AND his ex wife/baby mama AND his own kid#have told him to get his shit together and stop being an asshole to everyone#but yknow#if he stopped drinking it'd solve 25% of his problems and therapy would solve another 50%#but he refuses to stop drinking or listen to anyone but other brainwashed trumpheads so! fuck 'im#dad mention#alcohol mentioned#anyway. feeling better about my choice to stop talking to him#he went off on my mom today and called her a lot of horrible things and accused her of leading him on#when she has actively been telling him since they got divorced TEN YEARS AGO that nothing is ever happening w them again#but since he doesn't listen to her he didn't hear it and just dug his pity party hole deeper#anyway. back to my night having a nice time and having a good relationship with basically everyone else in my family#unlike some people 🍵 🐸
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
Agonizing over Tsubasa and Yuu in the FE AU that I will never public the writing
#Fyi Tsubasa’s the commander of Steel Wings platoons (Griffinknights) under Ryuuga’s (but actually Doji’s) command#Same for Reiji his comrade who’s the commander of Steel Fangs platoons (Dracoknights)#Ryuuga might be an emperor of their country but he’s heavily corrupted by a dragon stone Doji brought back#(Yes Hades cult is still a thing)#(Also Doji assassinated the prev King Ryuusei/Ryo and made Ryuuga#Who was basically Ryo adopted kid at the time#The king)#(Also Ryuuga is a manakete who got exiled throughly the dragon gate because the other dragons fear him#Prophecy that he will destroy the dragon world#But basically he will destroy Nemesis who’s an ancient Fell Dragon but that’s the end game plot for later#Anyway back to the plot Tsubasa is a Branded who got exiled too and got taken in by Ryo long time ago#So his lifespan is a little fucked he looks like a you by adult but he’s like in his 30’s#Anyway Ryo made him sent a baby Gingka to a countryside and away from the throne because he sniffed out something is suss#Ryo then got assasinated and Ryuuga is the heir to the throne#But Doji quickly corrupted him using a specialized dragons stone aka Black Gem so he’s a corrupted emperor now#And his goal is to collect the rest of the gem stones in other countries to finish the fire emblem#Which is in their possession#To revive Nemesis#So Tsubasa has to listen to orders to raid other country and terrorized people#Which he activities try to shy away from because of a pledge he promised to Ryo and in the day Ryuuga got coronated#Doji being the snake he is was saying that it’s for the greater good and made planted evidence to turn all the countries to each other#Yuu was a survivor from a village he and Reiji raided so Tsubasa took in in#Yuu lost most of his memories so he imprinted on Ryuuga because omg cool dragon lord#Anw Gingka eventually tag along with other and Kyouya gang who’s the Prince of a country to take down the Empire and eventually Ryuuga#But that’s a plot for another time#so Tsubasa bid his time until Gingka army needs a diversion - he then proceeds to sabotage the Empire by betraying them#And giving Gingka an opening#So he’s immediately got apprehended by Reiji and Ryuuga and narrowly escaped by taking Yuu with him#Yuu doesn’t understand shit yet so he thought Tsubasa was being the traitor and fight#But the bird is just tired very very tired he doesn’t want to part take in this bloodshed anymore
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
a starstruck odyssey is for lovers
#more than acofaf even. the love story of the wurst is what dreams are made of#emilymurph sitting next to each other...skip straightest man ever prince of alien slugs learning to be free bc of the crew...gnosis...#best on average npcs. lucienne plug bambi leroux the butch at the space station fuckin space heiress trust fund baby bajar crunch moon jone#and this is not to say ANYTHING of how good the characters are.#they could keep making d20 seasons forever and starstruck will always be a cut above the rest because of how fucking good the setting is#like with crown of candy even tho i loved it sm i feel like some politics were discarded in favor of the others; all out war was eh to me#the build up to a war tho? now that's interesting that's where the juice is basically i wanted asoiaf book one vibes with this cast but#that's a matter of personal preference! i don't feel like acoc did the most that could've been done with a “politics” campaign#dimension 20#dropout.tv#a starstruck odyssey#because of their deep investment in the world and the genre it never feels like starstruck couldn't do anything. it feels limitless!#season two...god if they never do one that'd be such wasted capability#ik fantasy high is so beloved and it is a beautiful lasagna of time and playing style but if i could get multiple seasons w starstruck...#the thing that makes asoiaf asoiaf is that we have a similar level of insight into the minds of baddies like the lannisters as we do into#the minds of the clean jesus allegory starks. and in acoc the “worst” character we got from the heroes was lapin n even he was aligned#to the rocks' cause. saccharina WAS a rocks -- that was her whole deal -- and even then she wasn't a morally reproachable character bc#she was right! i wanted acoc to be down and dirty and when they said ravening would be i was excited but even that turned out to be them#destroying a secret cult which was going to kill the world. no really down low shenanigans!
11 notes
·
View notes
Note
Can't believe Scar saw a rapidly approaching, dishevled mumbo and went "he's so cute." I need to run unorthodox experiments on them.
IKR SAME OMG
They’re literally perfect for each other <- delusional
But seriously they have so much lore together in my silly brain and the few interactions they do have (WHICH HAS BEEN INCREASING A LOT LATELY MAY I ADD) has been FUELING the fire rapidly and gods gods GODS do I have many thoughts about them
#literally making an illustration type comic on Mumbos whole vampire timeline#Scar will be next with his vex schenanigans..#the worst part is I always cycle like three to five different backstory’s in my brain for these two I CANNOT decide#but now that I’ve written a short ficlet (that no one will see unless asked) abt a few scenes of Mumbos backstory I think I’m pretty set on-#-his part#Scar tho??? no clue#I have the Hotguy backstory (which I daydream about WAY too much) I have the apocalypse backstory. I have the single player raised by villa-#-gers for years and years cuz his mom dropped him off in the single player world when Scar wasn’t conscidered a player yet since he was an-#-infant cuz it was a teen pregnancy and she was too scared to tell anyone so she just dropped him off with the villagers never to be seen#again. and since it was technically HER single player world when Scar DID grow up old enough to be recognized as a player he couldn’t#access any of the 'exit world' stuff or anything like that since it wasn’t his world#and then like a watcher or smth pulled him out of it so that Scar could be put through the horrors of gun related things for experimentstuff#and then there’s the backstory of where scar IS a watcher. like not a person turned watcher he was BORN (if you could say that) a watcher#and like the other watchers wanted to do an experiment of basically 'could a watcher if stripped of its memories and placed in a people-#-world be able to produce its own feelings and emotions?' and so they did that to Scar but they didn’t place him there as a baby no. they#placed him there as a full grown man so bros even more confused. and when the life series stuff started he had exactly one ☝️ dream per#Series and it was tiny little snippets of his watcher self but he didn’t know that it’s him but like he felt a strange pull towards these#dreams so that’s basically the reason why he kept coming back to the life games even tho they hurt him deeply as we all know#and then when he won secret life the secret keeper asked him what his wish was now that he’s won and he didn’t ask to know who he was and#where he came from (since he just appeared one day as a full grown man with no identification) since he’s made peace with that maybe it is#better not to know. so instead he asked abt the dreams he always has in these series and wth their abt and the context and stuff#and then BAM the secret keeper just drops all that information on him and he has an identity crises :D#anyways. I put both of these guys through many horrors I just have so many ideas for scar specifically. oh also there’s that backstory where#hes an assasin guy and he feels rlly guilty abt it when he gets split in half (gtws and btws) cuz like he has morals now apparently?? also#it explains the scammer stuff cuz he was a HUGE scammer bacl them#asks#hermitcraft#goodtimeswithscar#mumbo jumbo#redscape
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
about to leave a scathing review for a historical fiction book on goodreads (felt so strongly about it i made an account for the first time) then chickening out once i realised i'd put down my full name and i dont want to offend the author TOO much in case we end up working in the same field as historians
#missives#i admire her a lot too which sucks but holy shit. this book is bad its SO bad#maybe i'll post my review here just to get it out of my system#in essence its a book about a real historical figure but shes written in this way where literally all she ever does is serve men#and have babies continuously#and we're meant to believe she's fallen in love with her dropkick of a husband who does fuck all and is constantly abroad#and like. of course i can believe that's how some women were especially given their religious inclinations#but i could feel the feminism leaving my body the longer i read the book like it is that bad i felt like i was being brainwashed#it starts good like it goes into her childhood and relationship with her siblings#but then she just turns into her husband's mother essentially and its so revolting. and it doesnt even feel authentic? like#none of these people feel like real people. they dont fight they dont have nasty thoughts they are so fucking sanitised#i dont know what i expected.jpeg#and this woman is a historian!! she has a phd!!#yet she gets basic things wrong to an immersion-breaking degree#the whole thing is set during the civil wars but she NEVER talks about there being surgeons i have not seen a single mention of a surgeon#shes always referring to doctors and physicians but it's becoming apparent to me that when she says physician#shes just using it as an old timey word for doctor not because she properly understands the 17th century medical hierarchy#fucking hell. im so mad
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
really do like shri'iia being an oath of the crown paladin when she was still in menzoberranzan meaning that she very much upheld the terror and status quo lolth enforced over her drows. she was kind of an inquisitor in a way, or a crusader, and she hunted down anyone who didnt want to follow lolth. she was very much a part of the people who enforced that fear and paranoia lolth particularly likes, more so as she was kept in the shadow so she just instills dread on others without them knowing. her name is supposed to mean 'silent chaos' btw and she did just that. but then the script flips and now suddenly she's one being hunted. the worst part is shri'iia never understood why anyone would want to defy lolth before, but now that she's seen the other side and she's seen the potential that they were robbed from, that's when she understands why even though they were raised in the dark, some still yearned to see the sun. that's when she understands why her own mother was willing to throw everything away and be an outcast so she's not under lolth's gaze anymore, and i don't think shri'iia regrets what she has done when she was still following lolth - more so that she regrets and scorns that she never knew there were other options besides lolth, and it's possible to live without that constant fear and dread that comes with serving the spider queen.
#honestly becoming an eilistraee paladin fits shri'iia's route sm except that i dont think she wants to serve any gods or goddesses anymore#like she knows full well the depths of her own devotion and how it will lead to her own ruin#and she knows herself enough that she doesn't do things by halves lol. it's all or nothing for her#but man mmm i really like the concept of shri'iia being this kind of person who used to hunt down anyone who tried to escape lolth#/or worshipped anyone else than lolth. then when she gets forsaken she's suddenly thrown on the opposite pov#now shes the one who's hunted down like a dog. she's the one who's running for their lives to taste the sun that was stolen away from them#and now she's understanding why they'd risk everything for it. so now her story goes like does she keep running or does she turn back#you know .. i really like that possibility for her of regressing and turning back even though she's seen and tasted what freedom is like#bc she wants that certainty again. and there's a strange comfort in being in that hostile environment bc that's all she knew before u know#which is the more tragic end for her but it is possible and i want to do that route someday (its basically where she reclaims her oath agai#lol) but every time i think about it i get sad for her 😭😭😭😭 like you deserve to be out of the cult u were born in baby girl..!!!#shut up about bg3.
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
i might be dumb as rocks lmao
#hdhddjjss you know all the mulling and being really down made it really hard to accept to be around people#MOSTLY bc its a 'ahhhh i shouldnt bother them they have better things to deal with'#but then it went back into isolating again and 😐 sir youre not getting better by doing this#jfjdjd did i ever say? i used to invite my friends to go study together and all early on#but i stopped doing that bc i couldnt handle the idea of people dealing with me#bc of everything that happened + not wanting to have a breakdown in front of people but#oh and also a bunch of classmate drama but thats a different thing#sO it turned into 'oh wait i think people hate me'#girl you isolated YOURSELF what do YOU think is going on#tw vent#vent#anyways.#so friends kept inviting me out to study this week which made me kinda :')#like listen. nothing about being here feels real tbh. its more a dream and im just ready for it to come crashing down#but it sure is nice to still be invited out and kinda reminded people want me around anyways#regardless if i think im not worth their time and all that#i just feel bad if i start crying on the spot if i show up bc i am ! a cry baby#vent in tags#its not really a vent but meh#anyways. assurance goes a long way basically. im very bad at asking for assurance bc i dont think people should bother but#when people do these things its nice#just small gestures and all#am i romanticizing it a bit? i guess but ill just hold onto any belief for some sense of good lmao
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
was talking to my mom about how the adoption process worked when they adopted my brother and man some people truly are just scum
#all of their process was basically public? since there wasn't a private institution back then (not sure how it is now)#so it was basically women who were 100% sure they were going to give their baby away no matter what#and then when the day came they were like noo i'm keeping the baby (which should be good right?)#and then they would do a follow up and turns out there was no baby because they were basically sold illegally#obviously to people that were not from chile#because what um hospitals? no it's not hospitals but adjacent i guess#what they would do is that they would have a program basically were pregnant women would be like hey this kid once they're born?#i'm gonna abandon them basically. so they hospital would get in contact with the social service#the social service would contact people that wanted to be parents. the they would come and there was no baby because they were sold#obviously didn't happen to my parents but what did happen was the social service lady asking them#if they wanted to see the kid first in case they ''didn't like him''#and my dad being my dad got furious because what the hell that's my kid no matter what#and the sad reality was that a lot of adoptive parents would like to look at the kid first to see if they liked them as if they were what#a fucking couch#anyways. everyday i'm more thankful for how open my mom is about this whole thing and how it was#she still has the name and all the info of my brother's biological mother in case he wants to contact her again#(which hasn't happened since he had his very big and bad bipolar crisis)#but yeah idk i admire my mom a lot she's always trying to do what's best for everyone even if sometimes it comes out a little harsh#b.txt
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
my personal hc is that before cain and able had their little disastrous reunion at daevon (empire of dirt canon), cain had a lock of able’s hair braided into his own
#oh to carry the physical reminder of your brother with you all the time (the brother you killed)#the irony of able turning into a murderer vs cain becoming the repentant wanderer is not lost on me#ik agent xiaoshan basically said he was an angry lil twerp who played cod and was mad no one could beat him but i feel like its deeper#than that. like imagine you get murdered n then you get resurrected by a group of people who basically point you#at a rival army and go 'kill' and you do. bcos you're immortal.#and every society that encounters you afterward does the exact same thing#like when the foundation found him he had basically been in a cycle of drowning and resurrecting for like. centuries#thats enough to drive anyone crazy#and now everyone he actually gave a fuck about is either dead (agent AA) or hates him (iris) bcos the foundation#exposed him to a different scp that had the exact opposite effect on him that they wanted it to#like this isnt me saying able is some poor lil meow meow poo poo baby bcos i love his characterization#but just feel like ppl either flatten him out or overlook his character#and it is annoying to me
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
If you want a non scientific but lib-friendly irl example, my mum is obsessed with the show naked and afraid.
There are various reasons (eg men showboating as hunters while women quietly get to work with ten other types of food gathering, quietly rolling their eyes)
But the one that's relevant is the pair Vs the "XL" (?) episodes.
No matter how experienced and competent the individuals, the pair sessions are always a struggle to survive and eat.
But the group sessions? Suddenly one guy is making shoes. There's a whole functioning society in a matter of days, with people specialising. If you are on your own, you *have* to focus on food shelter and fire, and you'll often struggle with at least one. But in a group? You've got someone building, someone foraging, someone making fish traps, someone watching the fire and boiling water, and there's enough space for invention that some guy is making shoes! (There's been at least one person evacuated due to an infected stab wound to the sole of the foot so it's no joke, there's sharp sticks everywhere).
Anyway if you look at that difference its obvious very quickly that our evolutionary advantage (as well as our evolutionary vulnerability) is our group nature.
Also just like, imagine if you had to make every tool in your house from scratch. People who think they're sooooo independent and disabled people are the only ones with "needs" think that because they forget shops do not spontaneously occur in nature 😂. Even your intensive homesteader who makes their own bread and milk n shit.. did they make all their tools? Build their house? Their car? The roads? The tomato seeds and tree starts? Their mixing bowl and milk bucket? And that's someone who *does* do a huge amount of labour daily to be independent, and they're still completely interdependent, let alone Jeff from accounting with his £10 protien power lunch he had doordashed
them: SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST MEANS HUMANS MUST BE INDIVIDUALLY SELF-SUFFICIENT AND COMPLETELY INDEPENDENT
biologist:
#also re the elders thing specifically#humans are very odd in having a lifespan after reproductive age#and it has two main advantages that I know about#one is childcare while the fit are out hunting#which in turn allows our slower and more conplex brain development#compared to say a baby deer who basically has to be born knowing how to hide and be quiet and run#because it has to while mom is out in the open grazing#the second is as information repositories#story tellers#medicine#knowledge about local plants and whether theyre toxic#skills like weaving and sewing
378K notes
·
View notes
Text
I met a girl when I was fresh out of high school in undergrad who frankly, annoyed me quite a bit, but I also had an inkling to continue to be compassionate to her given a few things about her life/background/family
I ran into her two years ago. Last week, her daughter turned 1. This girl, let’s called her “P”, is a really good example of why I never feel comfortable mocking trad wives
Her perfect trad husband, who was a shining young figure in the local religious community, volunteered in all sorts of groups, well loved in his workplace and everything else, beat her up at 1 month post-partum. I reached out to her after seeing her desperately asking for a stroller on a page, confused and slightly concerned knowing both of them came from wealthy backgrounds.
The reality for lots of tradwives living “perfect lives” is this: P was immediately ostracised. All the wealth of her husband and her family meant absolutely nothing if she wasn’t in favour and doing what she was told. Her child and her well-being didn’t matter. P, at 25 years old, was basically deemed an oopsie, and left on her own to figure out how to pay for herself, a baby, find housing, and every other task you can think of.
Having known many of these women (and supported many of these women), another factor most people don’t consider is this: they are intentionally raised to be helpless. When I immediately offered my support to P, she really needed it. This young woman needed to be guided through how to apply for government assistance, how to weigh up rentals and apply for them, how to apply for jobs, how to sign up for childcare. How to sign up for your own power and internet, and how to connect them.
It wasn’t that she was “stupid”, or incapable, or spoiled. While it looks like they’re being sheltered, in reality, these women are practically being held hostage. Sure, they might be allowed to learn things that are expected of them (see: basic cooking, baking, cleaning, child rearing, women’s bible studies, hosting, and so forth) but they are heavily controlled from family life into marriage life, and they are never given the opportunity or the reality of what many of us would consider basic adult tasks.
She’s doing okay now. Her daughter turned 1, is happy and healthy. They live frugally, but they have a roof over their heads and the essentials. I often babysit for her so she can attend counselling, or go to a woman’s support group. She is painfully aware that she has so much to learn about how to live as an adult.
I don’t envy tradwives, but I don’t find any joy in mocking them either. Even when they live the most picturesque lives, they’re also practically living a real life Jenga game. If (and often, when) it comes tumbling down, they’re screwed too, and they often have 0 skills to help themselves or find community (that again, isn’t carefully curated).
#if anything I would say I pity the majority of them#material living aside - what an awful way to live.#katie rambles#tw domestic violence#tw abuse#ask 2 tag
19K notes
·
View notes