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orshii · 10 months ago

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Limitless (through the night)

Author: orshii

Pairing: biker! Choi San x female reader

Warnings: cursing, brief mention of death

Word count: 11,5 k

Summary: You have broken the rules, again. The punishment? You’re moving in with your father, sent back to your hometown which you had grown to be a stranger to. What happens when old affairs return in the form of Choi San? The only guy you wished to forever avoid, the guy who was a menace and always knew which buttons to push.

Will he put aside your differences and help you out when you get in trouble again?

A/N: Wow, I guess I'm here again...Ever since I saw these pictures of San, I'm obsessed with it, so a story kinda popped out of my mind lol. Like, I'll just never get over biker San pls, he drives me crazy, and I don't like it (lie). Anyways, thank you for my talented bestie @bvidzsoo for helping me a lot. I'm really a newbie to this whole writing and Tumblr world so, ly bestie hehet. Please, enjoy! I'mma be back soon, with a Hongjoong series too, lmao. Okay, byee, xoxo, orshii. (divider)

Moving to a new place could excite you due to all the new opportunities coming your way, alongside with new people, which may become your new friends.

In my case it wasn't like this. I was moving back to my hometown, which I have left almost ten years ago, leaving behind my father and all the people who I was once close with.

Now, I'm on my way back to my father, back to the house where we once were a happy family. My mother left my father, because it seemed like my father cheated on her. But the actual truth was that she just wanted to escape from this little town. She had no opportunities here, so she just blamed everything on him to have a reason to leave this shitty little town behind, alongside with me. I was only 10 years old, I did not understand back then what the hell was happening, so I just went with her. We moved to a bigger city, which was full with people. I never liked it, I hate crowds, I hate how the city is full with life.

After a while, my mother met someone and he was rich, so, we moved into a bigger house, which looked like a castle. I did not like it; I like simple things. I liked our old house, where the walls were cracked like a river spreading through the map. It was beautiful in its own way.

So why am I going back again to my hometown? I look to my left, where my mother is driving. She looked tired and mad; she was continuously frowning while she was driving. Maybe she was thinking about how she could bring a child like me into this world. Of course, I was the cause of going back to my hometown. It was my punishment.

I'm going to be honest, lying isn’t something I do often. Since I was little, I adored motorcycles. They are so beautifully shaped and their sound is simply music to my ears. I love watching them through the TV, the bikers riding their fancy motorcycles and competing against each other, going in circles like Formula 1 cars on the circuits.

My dad had owned an old Yamaha, it was beautiful. He noticed that I adored it, and so, he taught me everything about motorbikes; which part of the bike belongs where, he even taught me how to repair some broken parts. That was the moment I fell in love with motorbikes. I could not wait until I grew up and finally got my license. I had one purpose in life, and that was it.

And after a lot of patience, I finally got my license, but I had no motorbike. This became my next goal. To buy a bike. I succeeded doing that too, and I was proud of myself.

I looked back, where my beautiful matte black Yamaha R6 was tied safely onto the trailer. After I bought Toothless—I have named it that—I naturally joined a motorbike gang and slowly got into the world of racing. But these were illegal affairs, illegal races. You’d rarely get caught, so I didn’t worry about it. But one day I made a very bad mistake and I was left to face the cops. I was alone, the others—whom I considered my friends—left me there, letting me face the repercussions all on my own. As soon as my mother got me out of the police station and we got home, she started packing my things, saying 'You're moving in with your father.' My opinion did not matter, it was settled, and I just needed to obey. I did not care about anything at that point, so I just went with it without a word. Since that incident I did not want to make any friends, I did not trust people anymore, not even my mother. She betrayed me by sending me back to our hometown, treating me like I was a nobody to her. I never felt like I belonged anywhere, I am used of being passed around by others.

As soon as we drove through the streets of my hometown, little memories started resurfacing and I smiled. It was good to be back, to be honest, I have always loved this area. I never actually wanted to leave it behind, I just really had no choice but to do otherwise.

When we finally arrived to the house where we had once lived, a whirlwind of emotions hit me like a truck. My father stepped out from his car service, wiping his oily hands onto a used black cloth, which was once white. He looked tired and worried, mimicking the same expressions reflected on my mother’s face.

I stepped out from the car, looking around a little bit. Nothing has changed since I had last been here, and that was a long time ago. We never came back after the separation, my father used to visit us when he had the time, but it was rare, and our relationship went from having a happy father-daughter connection, to a shallow 'How's school? Good.' connection.

As I looked around, my parents were talking quietly just so I wouldn’t overhear them, but I knew they were talking about me. They were talking, and then suddenly my mother was moving, giving me a kiss on my cheek and saying 'Don't get into any trouble', leaving me there like I was an abandoned cat, handed back to the streets because it kept causing trouble. She chose the easier way, passing me into the hands of my father.

I pushed my bike into the garage and covered it with a blanket, I did not want Toothless to be dusty from all the dirt flying around the air. My dad showed me around the house acting as if I was there for the first time. I stepped inside my old room; everything was just how I had left it. The old drawing in which I had drawn our once happy family, and even my little pink shoes, which I had cried about leaving behind accidentally. Everything was the same, except me.

I got enrolled into the local University. I wanted to learn still as I had nothing to do; I needed to keep my mind busy. As I was headed to the new University on my bike, I felt anxiety crawling up through my body. I never liked new places, and besides, this was a little town, everyone knew everyone. And so, I was the new girl in town to them. The girl who came back after years of being gone. I don't really think anybody is actually aware of who am I. I had changed.

I arrived to the parking lot of the university, and cut the engine of Toothless. I sighed before I got off my bike, taking off my raven black helmet with red lines on it. My anxiety had finally crawled through my body, managing to reach my mind and thoughts, clouding them and keeping me locked in, not letting me go for even a second. My thoughts had always been my biggest enemy. Overthinking made me feel anxious about even the littlest things. It wasn’t good as this influenced my behavior, all the time. I tried to gather myself, not having noticed that somebody was watching me.

"Princess is back in town and has a little motorcycle, I see." I jumped at the sudden deep voice coming from behind me.

I turned around and saw a very familiar looking, handsome, guy in front of me, but I did not remember his name. He was smirking at me, his eyes sharp like a knife, glaring at me like he was a predator and I was his prey. He was wearing a black hoodie that hugged his broad shoulders perfectly, with black shorts that reached his knees, pairing with red Jordans.

"And who are you?" I asked frowning; I really did not know him, he looked familiar, but I could not place a name to his face.

He just tilted his head, looking at me sharper than before, "You don't remember me? I'm Choi San."

He was frowning his thick eyebrows, a little cut in his left eyebrow making his glare more intense.

Choi San, the mayor's son. Now I knew who he was, and I did not fucking like him. He was always the annoying rich kid from school, always stuck-up, acting all-mighty due to his family being rich. And he didn’t like me either anymore. At the beginning we were friends, but then shit started happening at home—my parents arguing constantly, not even noticing me anymore—and so, I closed myself off, not wanting to befriend anyone. I was just a child, my parents constantly arguing was a big enough trauma for me to stop caring about other things. So, I pushed San away, who, I assume, took it to heart since he started hating me and acting like a total jackass, not letting me live. It was like that until I left my hometown, leaving everyone behind.

"Oh, well then, I don't care." I said while grabbing my helmet from my bike and turning around to leave. I did not have the energy for this arrogant prick, he didn’t change at all, I could tell by his one little sentence.

He laughed, "Princess is mad, huh? Is that a Yamaha R1?"

He had asked while pointing at my bike, not letting me leave quite yet.

I sighed and turned around looking at him annoyed, "No, it's an R6."

My answer was short and snappy.

"That's from one of the newest series. I bet you begged on your knees your rich stepfather to buy it for you." He laughed sarcastically, and it sounded like an engine that needed an oil change. I sneered at the thought.

It hurt, it hurt because he didn’t know how many days I didn’t sleep because I had shift after shift, working my ass off. My stepfather and mother didn’t want to buy me a bike, actually they hated just the idea of it, but I didn’t care, so I took as many jobs as I could, and after three years of hard work, I finally get to buy this beauty. It had nothing to do with my stepfather. San was just being his old self, being an asshole, judging even though he did not know anything at all.

"Just fuck off, San." I snapped before walking towards the building. I was starting to get annoyed, but I didn’t let it show because I knew that was what he wanted out of this exchange. To piss me off, get on my nerves.

I finally stepped inside the building. I was a bit lost; I didn't know where I was supposed to go now.

"Let's race someday or are you scared, baby?" But San suddenly stopped next to me, looking at me arrogantly, not leaving me alone.

I laughed at the nickname, it was cringe, what the hell was he thinking? "I don't do shit like that."

I didn’t even spare him a glance.

"Then why do you have a motorbike?" San asked, looking at me like the police officer had when he was interrogating me.

"I obviously use it to go to church." I rolled my eyes as I started walking down the corridor. I got a lot of curious looks from the other students littered around in the hallways.

"I bet you raced in that big town of yours." San said, of course, following me.

I suddenly stopped in my tracks, and looked at him with deadly eyes, "Can't you just go and fucking annoy somebody else?"

"Princess is being mean for what? I just wanted to welcome you back in town." He said with a smirk on his lips.

"Oh, how humble" I said ironically, "Thank you for your kindness."

I smiled at him and saluted him before turning around. I did not have the energy for this egoistic guy.

I somehow found the director's office. He handed over my schedule and wished me good luck, and I was abandoned again in the empty corridor.

I was looking at my schedule, trying to figure out which classroom I needed to get in.

"Hey, new girl, are you lost?" I heard a voice calling out to—me— I had assumed.

I looked up and I found myself standing in front of a tall, black-haired boy, with the kindest smile I had ever seen in my entire life. He was wearing bright colors, which highlighted his bright smiley face, he looked like a walking sunshine.

"Hi, yes, a little bit." I said while looking at my schedule confused.

"Let me see." He took the paper from my hands and looked at it humming, "Oh, you are in the same major as me. I'm headed to that class; I can show you the way."

He offered me up with a sweet smile.

"Oh my god, thank you, you saved me." I huffed the air out from my lungs.

"This way." He pointed out the direction with his finger, and we started to walk towards the classroom.

"By the way, I'm Yunho." He said, reaching his hand out towards me.

I smiled while shaking his hand, "Y/N, nice to meet you. How did you know I am the new girl?"

I had asked him curiously.

"Everyone knows, it's a little town, the rumors here spread like the plague." He shivered with a smile.

I chuckled, "Oh, I see. Too bad, I just wanted to remain unknown."

"Your dad is quite famous in town, did you know? So, I assume he told someone you are coming, and puff, the rumors are everywhere." He gave me a side glance as he smiled.

"Yeah, maybe." I said, thinking about the fact that my father has a car service, which, I assume, is the only one in town. Therefore, people meet up with him constantly, thinking more of it, it isn’t a surprise that people know who I am, in the end it, it is a little town. We arrived to the classroom, and headed in.

The day went by quickly. I was glad I met Yunho, he was a funny guy, and he led me around the University, making funny comments about some students. I really needed him in order to integrate into this new community, which I was once part of ten years ago. It was as if I had to relive the past, as if I was walking down the same path, I had done so ten years ago, a path which might have changed during my absence. It felt like I had to start everything from the very beginning.

The days passed by quickly, and I just tried to avoid being in the spotlight as I found out everyone knew me, but I knew nobody, because who would remember the people they had met while being just a little kid? As I was randomly walking on the street, headed to get some groceries, random people would say hello and even ask how my mom was. I just quickly answered them, but I didn’t know who they were. I didn’t like the attention, when all the eyes were on me, so I tried to lay low, live my life quietly.

Then one day, as I had gotten closer to Yunho, he somehow convinced me to attend a party held by some guy named Song Mingi. I wore casual clothes, meaning simple black ripped jeans paired with a black crop-top, and a leather jacket. I am a biker, so the leather jacket is a must, even when you have to leave your bike behind, as I had done now. I felt like drinking something. I hadn’t gotten drunken in a while, not that this was my purpose for the night.

Yunho came to pick me up with his navy-blue Nissan GT-R. The car was beautiful inside out. And that is when I found out that Yunho used to do street racing, held by some local racing company. That's another reason as to why we became friends so quickly, as we were interested in the same things.

When we arrived to the house where the party was held at, it was already crowded. Luckily, there was the opportunity to stay outside, next to the pool, and so, I told Yunho I didn't really want to go into the crowd. He stayed with me, and to our luck, we found some alcohol outside too. There was a table next to the pool, and there were a whole bunch of alcoholic drinks on it, so, we took some tequila shots. As we were talking about some of Yunho's street races, I heard someone approaching us.

"Where did you leave your expensive bike, princess?" He clapped his hands together, reaching for a can of beer, opening it quickly with his thumb. He was wearing dark jeans, a white T-shirt, and on top a leather jacket. At least he knew the unsaid rule of the bikers. Leather jacket is a must, like I have said.

I looked at him with a glare, "I left it at church since I got drunk on the communion wine."

I said annoyed as it was my last wish to meet him tonight, “Just leave me alone, San.”

"Where's the fun in that?" He leaned close to my face, bending down to be at the same height as me, whispering it in my face.

"The fun must be where you brain is, which you seem to be lacking in." I pointed at his head.

He laughed loudly, "You'll see where is the fun when I beat you at the race."

He glared at me with his typical sharp gaze. It whispered danger. And I liked danger.

“I said I don’t race; do you have issues with your long-term memory now?” Despite meaning to be teasing and unabashed, my voice came out a little angry as I frowned.

“I saw the news about your little incident. You can’t be fooling everyone and telling them you nearly got arrested, princess.” He spread his arms, as he raised his voice, so everyone could hear it who was outside. I felt everyone’s eyes on us, coming closer, way too interested in hearing what the whole fiasco was about.

My blood had started boiling and I clenched my fists together, until my knuckles turned white. I was blinded by my sudden anger towards San, I just wanted to wipe that annoying, arrogant, smile off of his face. I stepped closer to him, my face inches away from his, as his back was facing the pool. He just needed a little encouragement for a swim, and so, I strongly pushed him towards the pool, and before he could fall in, I quickly whisked the beer out of his hand, and lifted it into the air.

“Have a good swimming, Choi San.” I placed the beer down on the table. That was my que to leave him there. I could feel his glare pointed at my back from the pool as he swum to the surface. I could feel his annoyance, that he felt embarrassed. I smirked to myself, Choi San, you have no idea whom you’re trying to annoy. Yunho came after me quickly and gave me a high-five for the move I had just pulled off.

The next hours at the party were spent by drinking and dancing, as I went into the dancing crowd. I just wanted to disappear in the crowd and feel good. I tried to avoid San the whole night as I didn’t want to see his furious side, San, who got humiliated by me. It was funny, I had to smile the whole time as I remembered his face when I pushed him into the pool, amused by the whole ordeal. I also got to know the guy who threw the party as Yunho introduced us to each other. Mingi was a tiny bit shorter than Yunho, but you could barely notice. He had a buzz cut and rocked his blonde hair; his sharp nose completed his small eyes well. He wore a black T-shirt with some silver necklaces around his neck, and black ripped jeans. His nails were painted black with some rings on his fingers. I am not going to lie; he was hot as hell. And I also found out that he races alongside with Yunho. He owns a Toyota Supra, and that nearly made me faint when he told me about it, because it’s a rare car. He then proceeded to show it to me. It was so beautiful and unique due to its painting. It was kind of a papaya orange with some words on it painted on it, 'Fix on' and 'Youth'. I really liked it.

I had asked the boys about what kind of race San spoke about, and they said it’s an illegal motorbike race, which happen to be very rare here. I quickly tried to forget about it. I didn't want to cause trouble again; I had promised my mom and also myself to stay low, to be better. San was just provoking me; I wouldn’t fall into his trap.

The next day at university as I was walking down the corridor, headed to the cafeteria, something immediately caught my eyes. It was a poster with a motorbike on it, of course it caught my eyes. I went closer to read it. It said that a motorbike competition was to be held, and the prize were some new parts to upgrade your motorcycle. This was the competition San was talking about, and it's going to be held tonight on the deserted streets of the city. I'm not going to lie; it piqued my interest. I miss speeding down the roads, the adrenaline coursing through my veins every time I race. And my bike is in urgent need of an upgrade, because these past days it felt like something was wrong with it, but I couldn’t figure out what it was exactly. For now, I'm going to let it go, but I still took the poster with me…just in case.

Evening came and I was in my room, I barely talked to my father all day, nothing unusual. Sometimes when I'm alone, and that happens a lot recently, I just start thinking about useless things that make me feel weak. I have never opened up to anyone before, I was never that kind of person, and besides, I always thought it's useless to open up to someone, because in the end they never truly care about me. And the fact that I was betrayed by my own "friends", it just confirms that I really should just stick to myself. I'm not going to say that it didn’t hurt when I saw my friends running away from the police, pushing me straight in front of them, telling me, "You are the new girl, handle it." Funny, I'm the new girl everywhere, I'm not going to belong anywhere, I am always going to be the new girl. They thought it was a nice joke, it wasn't; it ruined me. I started to think that the problem was me, that I deserved this, that I am not enough. As some time went by, I realized it wasn't my fault, but these thoughts still remained deep in my heart. And I will carry it with myself for a long time.

Here I am again, thinking about these things. These are those moments, when I need to clear my head. My solution for it is going out into the chilly air with my bike, cutting through the wind with the highest speed my bike can handle. The feeling of it being night, and I'm alone with Toothless, speeding through unknown streets, I feel like it's just me and my bike in this whole world. It’s like therapy for me. It just…understands me, just like the feeling you get while listening to music; sometimes you listen to a sad song, it makes you sad, it just describes your feelings, but if you are happy and you listen to that exact same song, it'll bring happy tears out of you.

I was going around the city aimlessly, when suddenly I saw a bunch of bikers headed somewhere. That's when I realized they were going to the competition. My heart started to beat quickly. I started inhaling and exhaling slowly, just the thought of racing made my blood boil, my skin itch, awakening my body like nothing else.

And as I kept following after them, suddenly I realized I arrived to the location of the competition. It was really my subconscious taking over, driving me here. I slowed down a little. There were a lot of people around crowding the bikers, watching their unique motorcycles. Some background music accompanied the sound of the engines as it melted together, creating an intriguing melody. The atmosphere here were totally different compared to the one in the big city. Back there it was just serious faces, who hated each other. But here, I only saw smiles and laughs even between the racers as it seemed like everyone looked at each other friendly, not viewing the other as the enemy.

I stopped my bike, turning the engine off after having parked it. I noticed some curious eyes on me. I didn't know what to do now, I was totally alone. I didn’t know anyone, but I needed to fight my anxiety as I took my helmet off. My helmet always gave me safety, kept me unknown, and that's what I always wanted.

When I stepped next to my bike, someone immediately caught me into a hug. It was Yunho. He lifted me up in the air and smiled.

"Oh my God, you are here, Y/N!" He said excitedly, putting me down.

I laughed, "Yes, I am. I don't know how exactly, I was out for a ride, and then I found myself here."

I said placing my helmet down on my bike.

"I am so happy you are here." Yunho said, his smile never disappearing.

"Yeah, I can see that." I chuckled looking at his bright face.

"Will you sign up for the competition?" He asked me with curious eyes.

I sighed, "I'm here so—I guess?"

I lifted my hands into the air, shrugging.

"Yes!" Yunho fist bumped the air happily, making me chuckle.

He then led me to a person at which I needed to sign up for the competition. I didn't know who I was going to compete against, just until Choi San came to sign up as well. I had already finished signing up as I stood aside with Yunho, while he leaned towards me and quietly started to introduce each racer.

"Did you know that we are going to race against each other, princess?" San said, throwing a quick glance my way with his sharp eyes, signing the paper in front of him. I checked him out very quickly, hoping nobody would notice. He was wearing his typical leather jacket but with a black T-shirt underneath, and ripped jeans this time. His black hair fell into his eyes as he finished filling out the paper. Every woman very noticeably thirsted after him, and I wasn't an exception…he’s fucking hot. What a shame he has a shitty personality.

I rolled my eyes and ignored him, tuning to face Yunho, who was talking to some guy I didn't know. Did San really not understand that I didn’t want to talk to him?

"I want to race against her." I heard San's voice coming from behind me. I turned around to look at him annoyed.

"You can’t get rid of me so fast." He winked at me, that fucker.

"I will, on the track." I smiled at him sweetly, turning around again as I went back to my bike with Yunho, adrenaline slowly starting to course through my body. I had to win this, I had to wipe that confident smile off of San's face.

The race started, it was a drag racing, meaning three bikers were lined on the starting point, it was a shorter straight section, then as the lights turned green from red, you just needed to shift the gears up as perfectly as you could. The first who reaches the finish line wins. Speed mattered only here, and how detailed you are about the gearing.

A few bikers were already done with the race, and I watched them curiously. Slowly, it was our turn to race. People were loud and they cheered whenever their favorites won.

I rolled over to the starting point. One guy was already there and I found out that I'm going to race against San and a guy named Hongjoong, whose nickname was the Devil. I didn't know him, but Yunho said he is one of the most well-known bikers in the town. He had a Honda CBR. His bike was sick, it was bright red and the owner sitting on it with his red helmet really looked like the Devil himself, I get why they call him that.

As I rolled next to him, I glanced towards my right as he was there. He looked at me and bowed his head, I did the same. It was a sign of respect. I liked the guy already.

San arrived to my left side with his Suzuki GSX, painted also with a very dark red, reminding me of blood, mixed with some black. These guys weren't playing, their bikes were absolute monsters. I could almost hide with Toothless, but my bike was almost on the same level as theirs, so I saw hope in winning this.

When the announcer spoke, saying our names and a few things about our motorbikes, I slowly started to focus on the task at hand. I did not hear anything else, just my fast-beating heart. I fixed my eyes ahead, breathing in and out. The engine sounds pushed away the crowd’s noise. The red light suddenly switched green, and I quickly lifted my left foot off the ground, concentrating on the perfect timing of the gearing, bending over a little to adjust with the speed. From the outside it looks like three bikes quickly reach the finish line, but when you are the driver, it feels like the longest minutes of your life.

At the beginning the three of us were head-to-head, then I was the one who was leading. I could feel the victory coursing through my bloodstream already. But suddenly, I heard a puffing noise from my engine, and it stopped without any warning. My bike started to slow, the thoughts of winning long forgotten.

'Shit, shit, no, no, no, no, no!' I mumbled to myself. I could barely stop; my bike was still resonating.

The two other racers quickly passed by me, leaving me with my broken bike. I glanced forward and saw San reaching the finish line first. I was so fucking close. I hit my bike angrily, and got off it to push it over to the side. This is the worst feeling ever, when you are so close that you can already feel the win, but then something out of your control happens and it’s not your fault, you can’t do anything about it, you’re only left with cursing the world, asking, 'Why me?'

I could feel something was faulty with my bike, but I didn't think it was this bad. I heard someone running my way. It was Yunho, and when he reached me, he leaned his hands on his knees, catching his breath.

"Fuck, what happened?" He asked straightening up, still breathing quickly from running.

"I don't know, the engine just stopped working." I kicked my bike. I loved Toothless, but when it did things like this, I felt like I was going to throw it out.

Yunho came closer to my bike, to try and see what the problem was. He crouched down to take a closer look as I stood next to him, using the flash of my phone to help him see better. I heard an engine slowing down next to us. Of course it was San, he took his black helmet off, smiling at me deviously.

"Daddy's money wasn't enough for a normal motor? It’s called karma, princess.” He said with a death glare, smirking annoyingly. “This is because you fucking pushed me into the pool."

Why the hell did he enjoy spitting out words that made no sense at all?

I could feel my blood boiling, my biggest desire at the moment being the want to punch that confident smile off his annoying face. I was so close doing it, I swear to God, I was ready to punch him hard, but that little sanity I was clinging on to did not let it happen. I always had problems controlling my anger. But slowly, I learned to handle it. I learned how to manage these feelings, so I just let it bounce off of me.

"Next time I’m going to push you into the sea, if you don’t stop being an asshole. Go, celebrate your fucking win, you really deserve it." I said, staring at him with deadly eyes.

"Your wish is my command, Princess." He saluted with a smirk, and then placed his helmet back on, driving away with his annoyingly loud engine. I scoffed as I watched him roll away.

"I think I'm going to call my dad, there's no hope in fixing it." I sighed. I'm going to get into so much trouble now. I was forbidden from racing, my dad won't be happy, I'm sure. But it is what it is. At least the cops didn't show up this time.

I called my dad and told him what happened. I was nervous of how he would react. To my surprise, his first question was about my well-being. He said he was coming.

While I was waiting alone for my dad—I told Yunho that he could since my dad was coming— Hongjoong stopped by my side, taking his helmet off. His blonde hair fell into his face as he ruffled his hair. He was damn handsome, he looked so soft, the opposite of his nickname.

"Everything alright?" He asked, his eyes full of understanding.

"Not really, my engine is broken, so yeah…" I said with a sad smile.

"Can I help you with anything?" He looked at me as if he really understood what I was feeling right now.

"No, thank you, I'm waiting for my dad to pick us up." I pointed at my bike.

"Okay, such a shame this happened. It was a good race." He smiled at me and then reached his fist towards me.

"Yeah, it could’ve be a good one." I fist bumped him, smiling.

"Next time perhaps then." He winked at me sweetly, "If you need any help, I'mma be around." He put his helmet back on.

"Okay, thank you." I smiled at him sincerely.

He rolled away quickly, leaving me there with my thoughts. Now, that's what I'm talking about. Why aren't there more people like him on Earth? He looks like an angel, not like the devil I suppose he is—on track. I was intrigued, I wanted to get to know him better. San could really learn a thing or two from him.

My dad arrived after a few minutes and we quietly placed my bike up on the trailer. As we were headed home, silence settled around us. I could feel he was pissed.

"I'm sorry." I said, looking straight ahead at the road, not wanting to see his disappointed expression.

"What did you think?" He started, "That you would race and I wouldn’t ever find out about it? It's a little town, Y/N, you already know how fast rumors spread here."

He glanced at me for a second.

"I know, I didn’t think, I just miss racing." Tears appeared in my eyes. "Please don't tell mom. She will send me to Azkaban after this."

Call it a defense mechanism, a trauma response, but I had always been like this…joking in serious situations.

I glanced at him and saw a very small smile appear on his lips, "I won't tell her, but it was very bold of you to race again. You can't do that, you know it, it'll have consequences."

He lectured me.

"Yeah, I know. Thank you for not telling mom." I said, relief spreading through my body.

"But you're still punished. You have to help me in the car service after school." He said glancing at me with a serious look.

"Okay, and maybe we could fix my bike too?" I said, glancing at him with a smile.

My father smiled back, "Maybe after we fixed some cars, we could check it out next week."

I clapped happily, "Thank you!"

The rest of the ride until we got home was quiet, I was happy my father was this understanding. I thought as soon as he finds it out, he'll send me back to mom, passing me between each other like I was a tennis ball. But to my surprise, it was the opposite, and I really didn't mind working in the car service. At least we could spend some more time together. I hoped we could fix our relationship, alongside with the cars, of course.

My days went by and they all were quite the same. I attended my classes at university, then my whole afternoon went by fixing cars with my father. He managed to teach me a lot of things about cars, even though my world was all about motorbikes I was always interested in cars too. I was planning on buying a car, but I needed to put that aspiration aside for a while. My priority was fixing my bike so I could finally ride it.

We checked out my bike and we found out that my engine was overheated, and that's why it shut down. An engine upgrade was needed, and we changed the turbo as well while we were at it. It was going to be even more powerful than before; I was so excited to finally try it out. On some days, Yunho and Mingi would come by the car service to check on me, and they even started helping me out in fixing my bike. We started getting closer, we laughed a lot in between the late-night repairing.

Yunho and Mingi invited me to watch their races, which were going to be held today. I had never been to races like this one before, so I happily accepted the invitation. I could finally try my bike out as I was headed to the race. It felt so good riding it again after a while. I felt like I could breathe again. I think I had gotten addicted to this feeling.

The race was held at the race track of the town, in the afternoon. The sun was slowly going down as I rode my bike, painting my black bike and helmet with the shade of dark orange.

When I arrived to the track, there were lots of people being excited about the race. It was a drag race again, but with cars this time. I looked around and I saw different types of cars, each looking very sick and unique. I started to feel excited as I was rolling down between the cars, searching for Yunho's parked car.

Then, I suddenly recognized someone with a blonde hair. He noticed me and started walking towards me with a smile. I stopped and took off my helmet.

"Fixed your bike, huh?" Hongjoong approached me with a genuine smile.

"Yeah, finally." I pet my bike with a smile.

"I'm glad, we shall try it out some day." He said with his white teeth flashing.

"We shall." I smiled back at him. I would wholeheartedly race with him again.

"Are you racing?" I asked with a frown.

"No, I came to watch, I won't betray my beast." He laughed sweetly. I swear to God, his laugh was like music to my ears, "You came to watch too?"

"Yeah, I've never been to races like this one before." I said, feeling excited.

"We can watch it together; I know the best place where we can watch it from." Hongjoong offered with a sweet smile.

"Okay." I accepted his offer quite easily, "But first, I want to wish Yunho and Mingi good luck."

"Come, you can put your bike down there, I’ll show you where they are." He pointed towards my right, where I could park my bike.

I pushed my bike to the designated area, and brought my helmet with myself. I did not want to leave my treasure there. Hongjoong lead the way to where Yunho's blue GT-R was parked, next to Mingi's orange Supra. These two cars next to each other looked so good. I was very tempted to take a picture of them.

I approached Yunho and hugged him from behind, surprising him. He laughed, "You came, finally."

"I would never miss it." I smiled looking up at him. He was wearing his racing suit with colors that matched his car. His hair was lazily brushed over his forehead, almost reaching his eyes.

I hugged Mingi too, the top part of his orange racing suit lazily hung around his waist, a white T-shirt underneath. This orange clothing suit him very well, highlighting his blonde buzz cut. They looked handsome. What is it today, everyone is looking so good?!

"I'm going to be in the crowd, watching you guys, good luck. Fighting!" I smiled and hugged them both again. Hongjoong also wished them good luck, resorting to giving them high-fives.

"Thanks, we'll try." Yunho said laughing.

We then walked to the spot Hongjoong mentioned before. It was really a good one, we could see everything from here. The crowd started to cheer as the first cars appeared on the track. It was a 2v2. Yunho was the first one, competing against a Mitsubishi Lancer. It was going to be hard to beat that car, but Yunho did not disappoint, and he won with a lot of advantage. Every minute counted here; they were measuring the time up until you crossed the finish line. Time mattered here as it could beat your opponent.

After a lot of quick races, the sun went down, street lamps were lighting the track up, the crowd cheering loudly. We laughed a lot with Hongjoong, and he explained the rules of the races we were witnessing. I finally felt happy after a long time, I loved the atmosphere here.

That is until someone sat next to me.

"Now you’re into cars too? Tell your stepdad to send you a car, a broken one perhaps." San said, looking at me with those fucking annoying sharp eyes of his.

Every time he appears, my mood is fucked, "I will, now leave me the fuck alone."

I had said not looking at him.

San laughed, "Not until we're racing with equal chances."

"Oh, so now you admit it wasn't a fair win for you?" I looked at him with a glare.

"No, I would've won anyways. I just wanted to see how much you could push. But your bike said, nah. I bet it'll fall apart again." He said, leaning closer to me.

My blood started boiling, it was one thing if I was the one saying shit about Toothless, but him spitting out these words about my bike were not allowed. Ever. San was provoking me, and I knew it, I fucking knew it, yet…

"Come, I'll fucking beat you this time." I looked at him with blazing eyes, starring at him sharply.

He stood up smiling, "It'll be my pleasure, princess."

He put his right hand on his heart and bowed.

Oh, how I would hit him in the face, I had nightmares about that fucking confident smile.

I stood up, Hongjoong grabbed my hands to make me look at him, "It's not the best time going out there, Y/N."

He said with concern in his voice.

"I don't care, I want to wipe that confident smile off his face." I was long gone, there was no chance of anyone convincing me doing otherwise.

Hongjoong stood up, looking at me with concern, "But please be careful, call me if anything happens."

He held my hands, he really looked concerned.

"Don't worry, savior. I'll keep her safe." San glared at Hongjoong with the deadliest stare I've ever seen.

Hongjoong stepped closer to San, letting go of my hands. "If anything happens to her because you’re a fucking idiot and your ass is just itchy, you'll regret it, I promise."

Hongjoong stared back at San, and in this moment, he really looked like the Devil. I stood between them as they were eyeing each other, glaring with their noses flared.

Whoa, whoa, hold on a second, what was happening right now—

"Okay, guys, stop! Let's not waste any more time and get this shit over." I looked at San, losing my patience.

He winked at me and then smiled, his dimples appearing. Did I just notice he has dimples?

He did not wear his usual black leather jacket tonight; it was a leather jacket with some red on its sleeves and on the waist with white lines. On the front there was a writing 'SUZUKI', referring to his motorbike being the same brand. I’m not going to lie; he looked hot as fuck.

We walked over to our bikes, which were parked next to each other. I sat on my bike.

"So where are we going? You know this town." I looked over to my left side to meet San's gaze.

"There's a freeway not far from here. There’ll be traffic, but it’s more exciting that way." He smirked.

I started my engine and reached my hand out, motioning to him to show me the way. We both placed our helmets on, and then it was game on from there on. There was no turning back anymore.

I followed San, turning on unknown streets, it was barely a five-minute ride. We stopped where the freeway began.

"The winner is who gets to the end of the freeway first. It's not that long." He told me through his helmet, being on my left side.

I just nodded, it was late into the evening, but the cars ahead of us were countless. It was a three-lane road, people might’ve been going home from work, because there were a lot of cars. We lined up at the side of the road, in front of the red light. San pointed at that, signaling that if it turns green, we start. I started to reeve the engine, my legs in starting position with my eyes focused on the road ahead of me, counting the cars, and analyzing how could I pass by them. Adrenaline crawled through me; my skin covered in goosebumps. I have never felt like this before, I was so hyped about winning this. I had to win this.

The red light suddenly changed to green, and I quickly lifted my foot off the ground, bending over my bike and shifting up. We slid through the cars like the river runs through the rocks. We were two quick arrows passing by the cars, wheezing from left to right. At first, we were head-to-head, but I got lucky and I could pass by a big truck very quickly. San wasn't that lucky, he stayed behind a little. We arrived to a tunnel; sudden strong light hit my eyes. Traffic was lesser here, so, San quickly caught up with me. The sound of our engines were so loud that its echo bounced of the tunnel’s walls. It was like music, the two-engine sound melting into each other. I'm not going to lie, I was enjoying it so much as I have never felt like this before, it was the definition of freedom. I quickly glanced at San and he lifted his arms, giving me a thumps up, then quickly passed by me. But I did not let that happen, I went after him. We arrived to the end of the tunnel, sudden darkness hitting me now, my eyes needed a few minutes to adopt to the dark again. As cars were in front of us, I quickly took the chance to go in between two cars, and I was leading again. Until I suddenly saw red and blue lights flashing from behind.

Shit, shit, no, not again—

It felt like my heart was about to jump out of my chest, it was beating so fast. I can't get caught again, no way. I started to panic, and suddenly all strength escaped my body as I started to slow down. I couldn’t think straight as all thoughts left my mind seeing those colors again, getting flashbacks of that night. The lights, then being pushed straight into the cop’s hands, my friends running away, leaving me alone. San was suddenly next to me.

"Hey, Y/N, don't slow down, we need to lose them! I know a shortcut, follow me!" He yelled over the sounds of our engines and through his helmet, as I suddenly was back from the flashback as I looked behind me, seeing as the cops getting closer and closer.

I just nodded, suddenly feeling my strength coming back to me. There's no way they will catch me again. I quickly followed after San, passing by the cars, the police still following us, getting closer. San turned right onto a street, then left. We went through alleys and little streets, where only a bike would fit. I had no idea where were we, but I didn't care, because it seemed like San's plan was working and the red and blue lights were now far away from us. Suddenly, San turned left and went inside an abandoned factory's court. He quickly stopped and turned off the engine, signaling for me to do the same. I rolled next to him, and switched the key to turn off the engine. I glanced behind my back, I didn't see any signs of the police, but I still felt like I couldn’t breathe. I took off my helmet quickly, starting to inhale and exhale quickly.

"Fuck." I ran my fingers through my hair stressed, pulling it away from my face.

"Come, let's go inside, bring your bike too." San said, getting off his bike as he started pushing it towards the building.

As I got off my bike, I was shaking, the adrenaline was still in my blood. We brought our bikes inside and I needed to sit quickly. I sat down, pressing my back against my bike, lifting my knees up to my chest.

"I think they're gone." San sat down, doing the same as me.

He glanced over me, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah." I said, still not looking at him.

"Are you really that scared of the cops?" I could hear it in his voice that he was smiling.

"San, this is really not the time where you can say shit like that." I glanced over at him. I guess he saw my expression, because his face changed.

"Sorry, I didn’t—" We lifted our heads up as we heard the siren sounds. The red and blue lights lit the walls of the factory, and my heart dropped to my stomach.

"Shit, shit, they are coming here." I stood up, San did too. But suddenly, I heard the sirens getting further and further away. I let out the big breath I was holding this whole time.

"They just passed by, idiots." San laughed.

I glanced over at him in disbelief, and sat down again next to my bike.

San mirrored me, "We need to wait a little, though, so they will give up searching for us."

"You were in these kinds of situations a lot, huh?" I asked San, staring ahead into the darkness.

"Kinda, that's why I knew what to do." He said sighing. Quiet fell over us as we both were thinking, probably not about the same things as he spoke up, "But I don't get it. What did you do that you got almost arrested? Did you crash your bike and kill someone?”

He looked at me frowning. I scoffed at him; I really couldn’t believe he was like this.

"You don't know anything about me, so please stop assuming things when you don't know shit." I stared at him angrily, "It's making me feel sick, San. I'm so fucking tired of your comments, what did I do to you for you to behave like this with me?"

I asked him, looking his way then at my hands, "I was just fucking racing because I love to do so. Why is that so bad? Don’t you do the same thing, San? I’ve got arrested because my friends left me there, so I was blamed for that whole mess, on my own. So, please, ask before you talk shit."

There was a minute of silence, "Fuck, I didn't know, Y/N. I don't fucking know why I'm an asshole with you. It is so easy to piss you off."

I glanced at him; he was staring ahead as he ran his fingers through his raven black hair.

"And you are enjoying this?" I scoffed at him in disbelief.

"Of course I don’t, it’s just—" He turned my way, "Lately I did it just because I wanted to race against you and I thought if I provoke you, then you'll come. I know it sounds stupid, but don't say you didn't like it."

He seemed nervous a little. Choi San being nervous, interesting.

"I did enjoy it, San. But what the hell, why couldn't you just ask me nicely if I wanted to come with you? I would've, if you weren't such an asshole.” I looked at him, “And our bickering or whatever did not start here.”

"Yeah…I know." He looked down at his hands, "When we were kids you suddenly just got cold and pushed me away like I was some garbage. I was a little kid, it hurt."

He admitted. I didn’t recognize this San, this softer, nicer, side of him was strange to me.

"I was a little kid too. Kids are mean, you just had a weak heart." I said to him, "That does not mean you have to be an asshole your whole life, because I mistreated you when we were fucking kids. This is it, San. You need to adapt to some situations; you have to let go of foolish things at times."

I looked at him seriously.

"Forgive me for being such an asshole, you did not deserve it. I just tried to blame other people for my weaknesses." He admitted, and for a second, he looked vulnerable. But it vanished away quickly.

And suddenly we started sharing about our lives, the cops long forgotten, things that we didn't know about the other. I could see the side of him, which he rarely let anyone see. He could be really goofy, we laughed together, trying to recall the ridiculous situations we were in when we were just kids.

"And just so you know, I bought my bike, not someone else. I worked for it, for years. I took shift after shift, because I wanted something. You know…it hurt when you said those things to me." I suddenly felt like I had to tell him how much he stabbed a knife into my heart that day.

"Fuck this, this whole situation is ridiculous." He scoffed, his voice getting weaker. "I'm so fucked up. I'm so fucking tired of adapting to what people expect of me. I did this my whole life."

I looked at him as he buried his face into his palms.

Silence fell over the chilly air as San seemed to be on edge, while he quietly sniffed. I couldn’t believe that San was crying. It came out of the blue; I did not understand the cause of it.

Suddenly, I slipped next to him. I just wanted to hug him, he looked so broken. So, I went closer to him, still sitting on the ground, and hugged him tightly as he scooted closer to me and buried his face into my neck.

"It's okay, San. Sometimes life can be too much. Just let it out." I stroked his back patiently. I felt some tears falling onto my neck.

I couldn’t believe I was hugging Choi San right now, but I have always been like this. I don't care if he harmed me, if he needs a shoulder to cry on in his most vulnerable moment, then I’m going to be there for him because no one deserves to be alone in these moments.

"I'm so tired, I'm sick of this pain…" He mumbled into my neck, sobbing a bit, "After my mom died—"

"Your mom died?" I lifted his head from my neck, cupping his face with my hands. I looked at him with round eyes. I didn't know his mother died; I was shocked.

"Yeah, right after you moved away..." He said, looking into my eyes with his puffy ones. He seemed empty, he seemed like he wasn't feeling anything at all, "She had cancer, she…She struggled a lot…and I was alone, I needed someone to be there for me, I tried…I really tried." He said, his voice getting quieter.

I did not want to believe what I just heard, his mom was an angel, everyone liked her when she stepped on the stage alongside with the town’s major. They looked like true leaders. I always looked up to her, and now she’s gone.

"Oh my God, I didn't know, San. I'm sorry for your loss.” I blinked away my own tears as I wiped away his, “If I would've known—"

I felt a bit overwhelmed.

Suddenly his expression changed, it seemed like he had realized what he had done in the last few minutes. He locked his feelings away, again. He thought he showed too much of his weaker, softer, side and suddenly, he started closing off, just like I used to do. The old San was coming back. He pushed my hands away from his face aggressively, not looking at me.

"Whatever, I don't need your pity." He stared ahead, and leaned back against his bike, lifting his knees up to his chest.

I scoffed, "What did I do now?”

I blinked at him, not understanding the sudden mood change, “Okay, you can't be helped. I tried, I really tried to be nice with you, but you are impossible."

I stood up, "I think the cops are long gone, let's get the fuck out of here." I pushed my bike outside not waiting for San. I sat on my bike, starting the engine. San arrived next to me, with his bike.

"I'm sorry, Y/N." He looked at me with sincerity, but I did not fall for it.

"Yeah, me too, have a good night." I said with a disappointed look and I put my helmet on to drive away quickly. I just needed to get as far away as possible from him.

Weeks passed since that night. I tried to avoid San as much as I could. I just couldn't face him; I was so tired of his games. There were a few occasions when he tried to talk to me, but I just ignored him. It's not that I don't understand him, I do, I know what he's been through…at least I can imagine. That night, I tried to see his good side, but he did not let me in. And it hurt, because I knew he needed someone, and I would've been by his side. But he suddenly decided to push me away. He closed himself off, stayed in the dark, not allowing me to light his path for a way out. I really felt hopeful for a second that he could change, that he would lower his walls and let me in. But no, he'll just never change, so I gave up on hoping. At least I thought so, but these past days I just couldn't get him out of my mind. When I closed my eyes, I saw him as he smiled at me in for that few minutes when we were freely talking about ourselves. I'm not going to lie, I liked that side of San, it was so pure. And I would've never thought I was going to say such things about Choi San. But he made me feel strange things.

It was late into the night when I was still in the car service. A car needed to be fixed by tomorrow and I told my dad he could rest, he has worked all day long and I could see he was really tired, so I wanted to fix this car by tomorrow. The weather seemed like it would rain soon, lighting striking every few minutes.

Suddenly, I heard an engine sound from outside. I frowned, who it is this late? I opened up the garage door and I found myself facing a soaked San, getting off his Suzuki, staring at me the whole time. His clothes were starting to soak through, the raindrops falling off from his leather jacket. It had started pouring badly; I haven’t even realized it. My heart was beating fast. He took off his helmet, his hair immediately getting wet. San ran his fingers through his hair.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him without any emotion.

"I just want to talk to you, Y/N. Please, let me take you to a place." He looked at me with pleading eyes.

"In this weather, San, seriously?" I pointed out, still standing under the garage, safe from the pouring rain.

"It'll stop in a few minutes." He said his, black clothes soaked now, waterdrops falling off his face.

"How do you know? Are you a weather expert now too?" I asked frowning. I was just as hostile as he once was towards me.

He chuckled and ran his fingers through his hair again. "I deserved that. Just like the pool."

He looked at me again. I could see a lot of regret in his eyes.

"That night, I closed myself off because your face reminded me of all the people who pitied me back then, when she died. I was only 11 years old, and I got sick of seeing those faces, it always reminded me of her death."

He started to tear up, his voice getting weak again, "Please, Y/N, forgive me. I know I fucked up everything, I just—you—you drive me crazy and I can't behave around you. I feel like when I'm near you I’ll lose my mind, like I’m not myself anymore. I said a lot of shitty things to you, and I judged you a lot even though I didn't know anything about you. I want to change that, I want to know you better, Y/N. I want to let you in, I'll do that if you also want it, but I hope you won't be scared of what you'll see."

I saw as teardrops fell down on his face, but the rain immediately washed it away, his voice cracking from the flow of emotions.

My heart wanted to jump out of my chest. I didn't except him to say things like these to me, "I'm not scared, San, to see your dark side. I never was, and I never will be."

Tears started to appear in my eyes, to my surprise, "You said some hurtful things to me, but I get it, I really do. I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable, but I was just so shocked, I didn't know…I didn't know, San."

I started to sob, tears falling from my face.

"I know, I know, baby." He stepped closer to me as he reached out for my hands pulling me out into the rain, into his chest. I cried into his chest as he rubbed my back up and down, my clothes and my hair soaked. I should’ve been the one comforting him, but in the end, I was the one sobbing like a little girl into his chest.

We stood in the heavy rain; our clothes wet, my hair sticking to my forehead yet he still hugged me like he never wanted to let me go. Caressing my back, he kissed the top of my head. I tried to inhale and exhale, so I could finally speak.

"I forgive you, and also I'm sorry." I whispered to him, lifting my head up from his chest.

He didn't let me go, his left hand was on my waist and he reached his right hand up to my cheeks to wipe off my tears, but they were wet again with tears and raindrops. "It's okay, don't cry, please, because then I'll cry too."

He smiled at me with the sincerity I've never seen before. His eyes were saying so much, it hurt. He finally let me in, allowed me to see his real self.

I laughed at that, and he followed suit, laughing together at this predicament, "Look at us, soaked like wet rats."

He smiled at me, never taking his sharp eyes off me.

Then suddenly his expression became serious, he stared at me as if I was his treasure, wanting to bury me, so no one could take me away, "I want to know you better, I want to know everything about you. What you like, what you don't, what is your favorite color, what do you like to eat, what you did while you were gone from here, what does it feel like to ride your bike…I want to know you, and never let you go."

He said, his hand still on my cheek, accompanied by his other one.

I smiled at him. I felt so happy at that exact moment, I didn't care if I was soaked, I only saw him, "Me too."

I said quietly.

He leaned closer to me, his lips almost touching mine, "Can I kiss you?"

He whispered against my lips sweetly.

Chills ran through my body. I never wanted anything more than him kissing me. I just nodded; words long forgotten. He closed the distance between us, and when our lips finally met, there was a loud thunder rumbling the world, lighting flashing around us and rain pouring from above, washing away our past where we said a lot of stupid things to each other. We could start with a clear page, melting our futures together. Our lips never stopped moving, it felt like heaven and hell met with each other as our lips moved against the other’s, just like when we were racing, both of us tried to win the other over. I welcomed San's darkness wholeheartedly and tried to scare it away with my light.

Then suddenly the rain stopped, and we separated from each other, looking up at the sky. The clouds were gone and the full moon was shining so brightly it looked like it was almost daylight.

I chuckled looking up, "You should apply to be a weatherman."

San was gazing at me so lovingly I felt like I was going to melt right there, "See? Now you can come with me, I want to show you something."

He held my hands.

"Okay, I should bring my bike then." I smiled at him, feeling as happiness crawled into my chest.

"It would be more proper if I was the one taking you there, but I want to race you." He held my waist and pecked my lips a few times. I still needed to get used to this San. I really liked it.

"I'm going to beat you." I scrunched my nose cutely.

"Okay, princess, but first, go change. I don't want you to catch a cold." He caressed my cheekbones.

"I'll bring you some clothes of dad’s, you'll catch a cold too otherwise." I kissed him quickly and then went inside the house, smiling like a fool, to grab some dry clothes.

It was the middle of the night, but two engine sounds cut through the late-night life. We were going up on winding roads, forests covering both sides of the road. I was laughing beneath my helmet as San goofed around, slowing down and then speeding again. I think I have never felt more happier than right now. It was pure freedom going through these curvy roads, racing against each other. But in the end, it was just the two of us sharing our passion, riding our motorbikes, the moon shining upon us brightly, guiding our roads, showing our future ahead of us.

I finally knew I belonged somewhere, to someone. It was my hometown, and Choi San.

162 notes · View notes

somniseeker · 8 days ago

Text

“ding!” [ undertale x reader ]

series masterlist : [here] | chapter one

summary: you can’t sleep, and at 3:49 AM, a notification pulls you into a mysterious group chat called UnderChat. the members—quirky and chaotic sans au’s like ink, fresh, and error—welcome you as their newest recruit, insisting you’re from an alternate universe. confused but curious, you hesitate to believe them, wondering if you’ve stumbled into the strangest roleplay or something more.

3:49 AM

That was the time, obviously. You were not catching a wink of sleep tonight, even though those eyes of yours were pratically burning at this point. Blinking at the bright light which popped up when you clicked a notifaction. "DING!" echoed the phone on full volume: You were just about to scroll through tumblr aud—

Oh.

Oh. .

You've been added to a groupchat.

Immediately sitting up you rubbed your eyes, curiousity gleaming in them.

UnderChat

You don't remember downloading that app. . Perhaps you accidentally clicked on one of those explicit advertisements on accident while reading on pirated websites, that seems like a plausible explanation. Still doesn't explain why you're recieving notifactions saying your in a groupchat. A groan escaped your lips as you clicked the notifaction, although accepting the fact this was some sort of call-out cancel groupchat, an accidental add, or it's fake and it's a virus. Probably the latter.

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[ SLEEPRLUVR has joined the group ]

FunkN'Fresh: wellllp ill be diddly darn darned we gots a new funky fresh membah?

GlitchBitch: Stop typing like that.

FunkN'Fresh: noo can do funny magic maannnnnnnnn

[ GLITCHBITCH has muted the groupchat ]

FunkN'Fresh: you maaaaaaad.

Ink: Oh! New member yay, Okay so I can explain this as your probably confused sans!

Ink: Eheh, "how do you know my name" you might ask! wellllp, yknooow the multiverse and all that stuffs? We made a groupchat!

SLEEPRLUVR: what?

Ink: Okay so a basic run down of how the app works, the three icon's at the side shows you every AU that has joined so far and what their username is - You need to create a profile with yours!

SLEEPRLUVR: what

Ink: Oh— You must still be confused, I'll just do it for you! What AU are you from?

SLEEPRLUVR: what.

Ink: ...

Fell2cool4school: prolly from "what"!tale lmfao

SLEEPRLUVR: no, just wasn't expecting roleplayers in my schedule today. i can do this - what aus are open?

The chat suddenly went dead silent, leaving you staring groggily at your phone, squinting at the screen. You couldn't help but wonder what was going on. Does it really take this long to grab a character masterdoc? It's been a while since you last roleplayed, but this felt off. When the next message finally popped up, you couldn't help but roll your eyes.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ━━━━⊱༒︎ • ༒︎⊰━━━━ ⋆⁺₊⋆

Ink: Oh, uh... this isn't exactly roleplay, but I get why you'd think that! Anyway, we’ve got a lot of AUs here, so take your pick! Let’s see… there’s Underswap, Underfell, Dancetale, and even some wacky ones like Dusttale and Underlust, but let’s not go there unless you’re into, well, *that* kind of stuff.

SLEEPRLUVR: ...i’m just going to ignore that last part.

Fell2cool4school: aww c’mon, why skip out on the fun? 😈

SLEEPRLUVR: This is ridiculous. Okay, so let's say I believe this whole “multiverse” thing. Why am I here?

Ink: Well, every AU needs a representative! Think of it like... a council! Each universe gets one member to join the chat, share ideas, keep peace, y’know? And... well, you’re the lucky one picked from your AU!

SLEEPRLUVR: but i don’t even know what AU i’m from. how am i supposed to “represent” it?

FunkN’Fresh: uhhh doesn’t seem too funkay to me, guess they jus got dropped here like a beeboppin’ newbie!

GlitchBitch: Figures. Another clueless one. Just what we needed.

Ink: Don’t mind them! We’ll figure out your AU together! It’s kinda exciting, right?

SLEEPRLUVR: mmm, more like nerve-wracking. can i leave?

Ink: Nope! Once you’re in, you’re in. But don’t worry, we’re all friends here! ...Sort of.

Fell2cool4school: speak for yourself, inkhead. i ain't here to make friends. only enemies. and sometimes frenemies. but mostly enemies.

SLEEPRLUVR: yyyeah, i’m definitely going to regret this. okay, so if I’m stuck here… how do I create this profile thing?

Ink: Just tell me a bit about yourself, and I’ll set it up for you! Favorite color? Likes? Dislikes? Any cool abilities? C’mon, spill!

SLEEPRLUVR: umm… favorite color? any, I guess. Likes? Sleeping. Dislikes? Waking up. Abilities? being normal???

GlitchBitch: Abilities: None. Fitting.

Ink: rainbow, sleeping, normal. Got it! I’ll just make your profile super quick…

FunkN’Fresh: "likez sleeping" heh. typical standard sans bruh.

[INK is typing…]

Ink: Done! Welcome to the UnderChat, SLEEPRLUVR!

SLEEPRLUVR: …i’m going to need a lot of coffee for this, aren’t I?

FunkN’Fresh: forget coffee, maaaaan. get some soda in yer veins, get the funky fresh groove goin’!

GlitchBitch: Or you could just log off and get back to your irrelevant existence. Just saying.

SLEEPRLUVR: …i’m starting to think leaving this group would be the sanest option.

Fell2cool4school: too late for that, buddy. you're one of us now. welcome to the madness.

You sat on your bed, legs crossed beneath you, staring at the screen with a mixture of bewilderment and curiosity. That was... ermmm, certainly an experience. These people seemed like some serious kinnies or something. You hadn't seen roleplayers this deep in character since the wild days of Danganronpa Kokichi Tumblr drama. You gnawed at the inside of your cheek, debating your next move. You had things to do in the morning, so maybe it would be smart to just get some sleep. But then again—shouldn’t you figure out which AU to be? They didn’t even give you a proper list of what was available!

You could at least deduce a few things. Obviously, GlitchBitch was the Error Sans of the group, with his snarky, broken-text vibes. Ink was, well, Ink, and FunkN’Fresh was soo stereotypically hippie, it was a dead giveaway who he was supposed to be. But who else was in this group—this "UnderChat" as Ink called it? And how were you supposed to see these profiles they mentioned? The whole thing was making your head spin, trying to figure it out.

Still, as you finally set your phone down and pulled your covers over you, you couldn't help but feel a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips. Yeah, it was weird—being added to some mysterious group chat by what seemed like over-enthusiastic roleplayers—but there was something almost... nostalgic about it. It had been a while since you just sat back and played pretend, no matter how weird the scenario... or old the fandom was.

Maybe tomorrow you’d hit up the Undertale Wiki and find a cool AU to rp as. After all, if you were going to be stuck here, you might as well have some fun with it.

* A/N: uhm, this was written for ao3 and crossposted on quotev and now we're here. it looks best, imo, on quotev because it comes with extra media!! but im here because ppl can send asks n stuff for extra content of the skellies. please reblog or comment , it helps my motivation

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mrsevans90 · 1 year ago

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Masterlist

Hi! Welcome to my tumblr blog and thank you so much for being here! This is an 18+ blog so please know that you are responsible for your own consumption of reading materials.

I'm a newbie at all of this so if the links don't work, please message me. I'm hoping I can turn this blog into a little slice of heaven with all of my favorite things. Show kindness or show yourself out! I won't tolerate online bullying and will not hesitate to block. If my writing is not your thing, that's totally okay. I hope you find something that is. Don't be a hater :)

I plan to write about Chris Evans Characters, Henry Cavill Characters, possibly some Sebastian Stan and Glen Powell.

Here's what I've got so far!

Clark Kent/Superman:

Double Life

Captain Syverson:

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 1

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 2

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 3

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 4

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 5

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 6

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 7

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 8

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 9

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 10

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 11

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 12

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 13

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 14

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 15

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 16

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 17

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 18

Syverson Series: Puppy Love Part 19 Epilogue

Taglist: @shellyshellshell @kingliam2019 @identity2212 @geralts-yenn

#henry cavill characters #captain syverson #superman x reader #clark kent #chris evans characters #steve rogers

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amysubmits · 4 months ago

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Is there any kind of... sub beginner classes anywhere? I think there should be at least a youtube series about it. There's such a fine line between "i'm submitting to this person" and "this is abuse papered over with BDSM language" and there should be classes to help new subs learn the difference before they're murdered

Kink classes do exist. There are sometimes conventions that will have a bunch of classes to choose from across a day or a weekend. I have never participated in our local BDSM community but I have heard that sometimes if you go to a local kink club they will sometimes host evenings where someone will teach on a certain subject, too. I think generally it's easier to find classes that are more about specific aspects of kink (like how to flog or a beginners shibari class) than lifestyle D/s stuff, but they do exist. Some people on here advocate really strongly that they feel in-person communities are significantly safer than online ones. On the other hand, I've also had a lot of people message me over the years telling me about how they were harmed by someone who was in good standing in their local community. Sometimes even how they reported a consent violation or other abuse with a community member to leaders within a community and that person was not kicked out or nothing else was done. Some claim they can basically be a 'good old boys club' kinda mentality, unfortunately. So as someone who doesn't have experience with a local community I've never really known what to believe, but my advice would just to be super cautious in ANY community, in person or not.

For those wanting to be educated but not wanting to do anything IRL, there are books about healthy D/s, podcasts, youtube channels, etc. Loving BDSM is a solid resource from what I understand. I personally felt like I learned a lot from Tumblr when we were new, though we were careful in picking and choosing which content to embrace and which ones to reject and not everyone may have the insight to know which posts are promoting healthy D/s vs which ones aren't, so that can be messy. I think educating yourself is great, but I think people who want to educate themselves can pretty easily dive in on their own, in most cases. And people who choose not to, are choosing not to. So I'm not sure that any sort of class or even series of classes or books could really guarantee to keep newbies safe, unfortunately. Sharing red flags so that newbies can recognize them is a great thing, and I try to do that when I see good info coming across my dash. At the same time, it's not uncommon for subs to share that they engaged with a person who they knew had one or even sveeral red flags and they ignored those red flags. They were so desperate to get to try out D/s or they wanted to cling to the good they saw in the person, or so many other reasons. And that doesn't make the abuse their fault, I am not blaming them, but it does mean that educating new subs about what dangerous "doms" look like isn't always enough, unfortunately. It's complex.

#asks #d/s

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byslantedlight · 7 months ago

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Hello OFMD Tumblr thingie, and all the amazing people who are out there, and especially the ones who've been making all the posts that have made me so happy over the last few months. 💖💖💖 First and most importantly, thank you, thank you, thank you, to anyone who sees this!

This is my first post to Tumblr (probably pretty obvious from my huge lack of Tumblr sophistication! And the length of this post...) If you don't count reblogging things that I wanted to be able to find again. I've braved up to comment thank you to people a couple of times, but that's been it so far. I must admit it all looks a bit scary from this side of the glass, even though I can also see how friendly people mostly are.

But OFMD fandom is big! And you've been here a long time! I loved Series 1 when I watched it, and knew I wanted to watch out for Series 2, but it wasn't until I re-watched it when the Series 2 trailer came out on BBC iPlayer that I fell veeeery in love with it! And by then you were already here, and there was a language and debates about things I'd barely even noticed, and it's mostly me staring with big eyes thinking wow, and sometimes huh? and... well, you know. Plus there's trying to work out Tumblr, which I definitely haven't actually managed to do yet, and possibly never will, so... I decided to just jump in and post summat. Even just rambling, which is a bit of a specialty of mine... I mean - what's the worst that can happen, right? 😬

So... how come now? Well, I can't make art or gorgeous screenshots or gifs. I do write, but I'm still hanging out to get the right voices in my keyboard... I know them when I hear them, but you've gotta get the right rhythm going, and I'm not quite there yet, I don't think. Although really, I should probably just sit down and try (and stop waiting for work to shut up and give me time - I should be a pirate and take it!)

Anyway (told you about the rambling...) what I'm mostly doing apart from rewatching the eps on a constant loop is reading the fic. I'm picking it according to kudos on AO3, and according to recs that I see on Tumblr, and it's occured to me that alot of the stories I'm loving must have been recced looong ago, and that newbies like me totally missed them, and so maybe I could do my own recs, even if they are of older stories, and someone might find them useful. You know, if I work out how anyone else might ever see my posts. 😁 And if people aren't put off by my probably age-revealing use of emojis. (But I am entirely age-appropriate for Ed and Stede, and if I had to look up what zaddy meant too, well, that just means I matched Rhys Darby's expression in the bts, right? 🤨)

So it's not much, but I'd like to contribute even just a tiny bit to OFMD fandom in return for everything it gives me, so... yeah. That's my plan. I'll start in a bit, but this post is probably already too long since it's just rambling. And kind of dull. I should probably have said tl:dr at the top, shouldn't I, but then maybe anyone who actually saw this wouldn't, so... See, I kind of live in hope. 😊

Okay. Tags next, right? ... ack ... why won't it let me create new tags instead of just using ones from the drop down...? Well, those will have to do for now... maybe someone who sees this will have mercy and tell me how? I'll just be over here being a slight failure at Tumblr... And if you've made it this far (how long is an acceptable post over here?! Not this long, I don't think...) - thank you hugely for just that, and may your dreams be OFMD and joyous!

#ofmd #ofmd fanfic

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dilucpainsme · 6 months ago

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StarStruck (Diluc X Reader) (Movie star/actor au)

Ahhh, this is really rough and my firs time posting something just for tumblr. When I mean rough, its like only been looked over a few times. Anyway I like the idea of Diluc cheating on Jean lol, he's a little out of character but whatevess

TW: Cheating, Smut, affairs (?)

Words: 10950

A female walked onto a busy set that had just finished being built. Busy workers and extra’s being pointed around in different directions. The (h/l) (h/c) haired girl stopped and looked around. She was dressed in some casual clothing, sunglasses covering her eyes. The girl was a bit lost, and honestly kinda confused as to where she should be. This wasn’t her first time on a movie set, but it was a huge lot with a ton of different places, and trailers. She lifted her sunglasses up and placed them on top of her head, glancing down at her phone to see the text from her manager.

“(Y/n) (l/n)! I haven’t seen you since you were a newbie!” The female named (Y/n) twirled around to see a short woman, with white and blue pastel hair. Her bright eyes lit up at the sight of her. “Furina!” The girl happily called out for her old friend while walking towards her.

“How are you? You’ve gotten so much taller, oh my gosh are you wearing Dior!?” (Y/n) laughed and dismissed her friend. “I’m doing well, where is Neuvillette? Is he here directing the movie or are you?” The whole reason the female was even here was to act in the new romance movie Furina had recently written. It was supposed to be a box office hit and she had personally been asked by her old friend to play the lead female protagonist. It was only fitting for her, after all, the writer was the reason (Y/n) even got into the acting scene.

“Oh yes! He is on the main set speaking with Diluc Ragnvindr. Do you know him?” She shook her head and started to follow Furina as she began walking. The woman didn’t know much about the movie, only that it was a romance, and if this one did well like everyone was predicting then there would be a series to follow. She was hopeful it was going to go well because she cleared her schedule for the next few months just for this role.

“Uhm, not really. I mean I know of him, we’ve spoken once or twice before at events but other than that we aren’t friends or anything.” Furina nodded her head and opened a door to one of the stages, and inside it was filled with people. But even so, she could see the tall man with striking white hair and his classic dark black cane in hand. She waved a bit trying to catch his eye, and he just waved back to her along with a man next to him. She could tell it was Diluc from the striking red hair and matching fiery eyes.

He was well known in most action movies, his most famous one being the ‘Dark Knight Hero’. He wasn’t a romance or rom-com type actor so she was kind of worried about how they would get along, but she kept that thought to herself for now. She kept following Furina, and people cleared a path for them as they walked through the building. On their way over few people said hi to (Y/n) and she just smiled at them, giving a few familiar faces a wave.

It only took a minute or so to reach the main set and finally catch up with the two men. “Diluc, this is my dear friend (Y/n). She is going to be your co-star for a couple of months!”

He held his hand out, hardly any smile on his face as he spoke. “Hello, I think we’ve meant a few times at red carpet events.” The female gave him a small smile and nodded her head, reaching to accept his handshake. “Yeah, I’m usually around Kaeya and Tartaglia.” He made a humming sound and looked down at the script Neuvillette handed him a bit ago.

The man wasn’t exactly keen on any of his brother's friends but if he was going to be working with her, they might as well get along with one another. This type of movie also wasn’t his scene, but his fiance Jean was begging him to try new things lately. So when Furina asked him to be in her movie he was pretty much forced to say yes. He liked acting, it was all he wanted to do when he was younger, following in his father's footsteps, but, his father was more of a crime, and science fiction actor. He preferred action-packed movies, and occasionally if the pay was good horror. Not petty-filled drama stuff. But here he was, with the contract already signed.

The girl across from him seemed to know Furina and Neuvillette already, and he recalled her face from some movies that Jean and Lisa would watch. She was a decently talented actor, more known for her singing career but still good at her work. He figured they would get along fine, besides the fact that she was friends with Kaeya.

(Y/n) on the other hand, was excited to start working, she wasn’t sure if he would live up to her expectations and that made her nervous but she could only hope they would be a fit for each other. Even if the man seemed to be a bit standoffish she would have fun, and hopefully gain a new friend during this whole thing.

—-

“Alright, you two, this scene is very important. It’s both of your character's first time speaking to one another, both of them very unhappy with the situation they are in. A princess being married off against her will, the knight is forced to keep guard over a bratty princess! It’s-”

“Furina we got it.” (Y/n) laughed a little trying to keep her smiles hidden behind the script in her hand, Diluc beside her rolling his eyes. It was the second week of filming and they had done most of their solo scenes at this point. It was now time for them to start working together on screen. They were on a tight schedule with the production team trying to get teasers for the movie released as soon as possible. It was a fantasy movie about a princess and a knight, but knowing Furina it had to have some sort of dramatic plot twist in it. So with all the interviews she was doing, teasing and almost spoiling the damn thing, everyone wanted to wrap up filming as soon as they could before the woman said something.

“Good, then get to it!” She turned the two around and shoved them back onto the set, the female nearly tripping in her long dress. “Places-And action!”

(Y/n) took her place sitting on the fake stone wall, pretending to look down at the ‘scenery’ below her. Diluc also took his place, a bit off the scene, as he needed to walk in during the start of the shot. The camera started rolling, and the two began to talk to one another. While they were filming a woman walked up to the sidelines beside Furina. She looked down at the short woman and whispered. “How’s he doing?” The white-haired girl looked up to see Jean, Diluc’s fiance smiling at her.

“So far so good! His acting is amazing for someone who hates romance.” The blonde snickered and watched the two go on.

The princess turned her head as she heard someone approach her, the woman's eyes scanning the garden walls behind. She sighed as she saw the knight that was made to follow her around. “I wasn’t going to jump if that’s what you think.” Her voice held a tone of annoyance to it as she spoke. The man cleared his throat and stood there, his eyes looking up to the high wall, slowly rolling them at the princess’s ignorance.

“I assumed that wasn’t your intention, but if I may so boldly ask. What are you doing up there my lady?”

Furina bit her nails and smiled, excited to see her work coming to life. The two worked together effortlessly, as if this wasn’t the first movie they shot together. Jean was even a bit impressed seeing her soon-to-be husband doing so well in this kind of movie. It took a couple more calls, and a few more takes to get the whole scene finished up but it went rather quickly. She called it quits for the night and they had managed to get a decent chunk done today. The blue-eyed woman excitedly told everyone to get some rest and that she would see them all tomorrow, at the same time.

(Y/n) sighed in relief and immediately took the annoyingly heavy crown off her head, handing it to one of the assistants, and thanked them. She loved fantasy movies but man she hated the costumes. They were always so bulky and tight. She just couldn’t stand to be in them. The girl walked over to the vanity near the costumes and started to take off a few more pieces of her costume, the gloves, the jewelry, and hair clips. She couldn’t wait to take the makeup off as well, set makeup was always so cakey.

“Hi, (Y/n) right?” The female looked over to see a blonde girl that looked vaguely familiar. Once she came closer it clicked in her brain where she knew her from. Her name was Jean, and she was a model in some fashion magazines, and most importantly Diluc’s fiance. “Yea! You’re Jean, like from the modeling magazines I see all the time?” The blue-eyed woman nodded laughing a bit.

“I just wanted to come introduce myself, I’ve seen most of your work and I’m kind of a fan.” The girl felt her face heat up and she brushed some hair out of her face. “Oh really? That means a lot to me thank you!” Her voice perked up and she was incredibly grateful to get such a compliment from such a well-known figure in the industry.

“I was wondering if you wanted to join me and my fiance for dinner tonight? I would love to chat more about your work, and it would be a better chance for Diluc to get to know you. I mean the movie has some pretty intense scenes.”

“Of course! I would love to.”

—

After that dinner, (Y/n) could see her and Diluc getting along better. Not that they fought or anything before but they started to talk off-set and in between breaks. Like today, during lunch, the two decided to grab a bite at the Cat’s tail. They each went over their scripts looking at the next scene they were doing later. “Furina is going to kill us with this.” The girl wanted to smack her head on the table.

“It’s sort of–” He cleared his throat. “Raunchy?” (Y/n) finished the sentence for him.

“Yes, that.” Diluc gave her a small smile and she just laughed. “Okay putting work aside how’s the wedding planning going with Jean?” The question wasn’t something Diluc hadn’t heard often as of lately. It’s all anyone was asking him. Jean was the one planning most, if not all of the wedding because of the movie. She told him over and over again she didn’t mind doing it but he felt bad. He knew how long she had been dreaming of their wedding. The two of them were high school sweethearts after all, and it drove the media crazy. He wished he could do more for her.

“Can I be honest with you?” (Y/n) nodded her head. “I don’t know, Jean is planning it, I’ve been preoccupied with the movie. I want to help more, but when I get home I just drop onto my bed.” He frowned and took a bite of his food, glancing down at his phone. The two didn’t live together either, so it made it that much harder.

“That sucks. I mean we're already one month into filming we only have like, what, two left? Then you can focus on helping her more.” She gave him a small smile and grabbed her script once again. She flipped through the pages figuring out how she would keep a straight face saying half these lines.

“What about you? How is your current dating life going?” (Y/n) froze a bit, her eyes lifting to look at the redhead across from her. “Huh?” The question caught her off guard. Her dating life was never in the news, because it was non-existent. It was a fair question though, she had technically asked about his, so he was doing the same thing. But besides that, her dating life was dry, dry as a bone. The media only ever spoke about her when she had done something to change her appearance and picked her apart for that.

“Oh, I don’t date.” She looked back down at her script, trying to hide the red spreading across her face. It was a little embarrassing to say that at her age she didn’t date or even hook up with people. “You don’t date? But you do romance movies?” She nodded her head.

“Well, I find it easier, if I date someone who doesn’t like my choice in movie roles then there is a problem. If I don’t date then I don’t have to worry about it. Plus I’ve never had a boyfriend so I wouldn’t know where to start.” Diluc raised a brow at the female. The girl across from his had never even considered dating it. Which made him see her differently for some reason. It wasn’t bad but that was just an interesting part of her he didn’t expect. Maybe that was why she liked doing romance movies, it gave her a taste of dating but without actually doing it.

“I see, so that’s why you don’t attend any events with a partner.” She glanced up again and glared at him. “Hey, I go with friends.”

“You’re friends being known to hook up with anything that breathes.”

“That’s only Kaeya, Alhaitham is dating Kaveh. Oh shit don’t tell anyone that.” She covered her mouth with her hand looking wide-eyed at the man in front of her. Diluc chuckled and nodded his head. “I won’t, but we should get back soon.”

—-

“Furina!” (Y/n) stormed the woman’s trailer, her arms flailing around with the script in her hand. “Hey, (Y/n)! What’s up?” She smiled innocently and scrolled on her phone as if she didn’t have a clue as to why the actor was barging in her trailer.

“When did you add a sex scene to the movie?”

“Well the investors wanted to make it an R-rated movie so I had to throw something in there, plus Diluc doesn’t mind, and neither does Jean.” Her eyes never left her phone screen. It didn’t bother her that she had a sex scene, she had done plenty of those in her career so far. It was the fact it was with Diluc. The more time she spent with him, the more she started to like him. It wasn’t even in a cute schoolgirl way. He was so hot, and his personality made him even more attractive. The idea of an R-rated scene with him made her head spin.

(Y/n) sighed and after their very short conversation left the trailer starting to make her way back to set. They still had quite a bit to shoot today and it wasn’t even lunch yet. She was already tired from yesterday because they had stayed later than they all wanted to due to the timeline being shortened even more.

On top of her current workload, she was in the news for a rumor spreading about her and Diluc. Jean would make light of it and joke but (Y/n) didn’t want anything to make it awkward between her and Diluc. Plus it was a rule she had made when she first started, she didn’t date. Plus the homewrecker label wasn’t something she wanted attached to her either.

She carried herself to the set, then fixed up her hair and makeup as the crew rushed her over to the stage. Neuvillette was the director for today, and he wasn’t as fun as Furina, but he got stuff done that was for sure. So once she was there and ready he started rolling the camera.

The princess was pushed into the corner, her knight being the one to move her there. She was trapped between his arms, their faces just inches away. She could hear him panting as he tried to hold himself back, in fear he would do something they would both regret. The two were hiding from the wondering maids around the castle, for if they heard they would surely gossip about their affair to the King. “We can’t keep doing this,” She muttered her eyes trying to avoid his. “You don’t love him, why do you feel so wrong about this? The king doesn’t respect you,”

“Because I am to be wed to him in the next few days if anyone catches us he will surely have you killed.” She turned her gaze back to his. Her whole body tensed under his stare, and she couldn’t help but lean forward. “I couldn’t bear to see you suffer such a fate,”

“Cut! Come on this is supposed to be a tense moment between you two.” Diluc and (Y/n) turned their heads to see Furina entering the room, a scowl on her face. Everyone sighed and stopped what they were doing. The woman wasn’t even supposed to be on set right now. “I want his hands all over you, pulling you close. Not just staying in one spot!” The woman started barking orders at the two, both of them rolling their eyes in unison.

“Diluc I know this is your first romance but come on you should feel the passion between the two.” The redhead sighed and removed his hands from their place, moving them to cross over his chest. He frowned at Furina. (Y/n) just huffed and ran a hand through her hair. She was already annoyed from the heat, and how much she was sweating in the tight corset undeath her bulky dress.

“What exactly are you wanting from us Furina?” The actress leaned against the wall she had just been pressed against moments ago.

“Passion! Lust! Something this is just stale! Now let's go again!” She twirled her finger in the air, signaling for everyone to start over.

The man moved his hands, to the female's waist and pulled her close to him, their bodies flushed against one another. “I can’t let you fall into his hands, the King is no good for you,” The knight's free hand moved to grab her chin, gently pulling her face towards his. “My love I would go to the ends of the earth for you-”

Furina was mouthing the words that Diluc was speaking, her hands placed on her chest as she watched the two. This was exactly what she was wanting, she could see the heat between the two, the lust growing. Or really what was happening (Y/n)’s brain trying to process how close Diluc was to her, and how he was touching her so gently.

The gap between the two closed, as the knight pressed their lips together. The hand that was cupping her face now moved to her shoulder and traced down her body. The action left goosebumps on the girl’s skin as he crept further down to her waist, now having both of his hands grip so tightly. The princess tangling her hands into his long hair, pulling ever so slightly. She gasped between every frantic kiss he gave her, trying her best to keep quiet in the echoing hallways.

It didn’t take too long to get what Furina wanted. A full makeout scene in a dark-lit castle. The woman was ecstatic and once ‘cut’ was called the two slowly pulled apart from each other. Everyone else too excited with the shot they just captured to notice either of the actors. The couple stared at one another, panting breathlessly. (Y/n) felt her face bloom with a red color and she cleared her throat. “Good job, uhm I’m going to head back- uhm- goodnight.” She excused herself from the set and fled the room her brain spinning. Diluc on the other hand stood there a bit dazed not sure how he felt. He had kissed people before for movies but this was-it was different. It wasn’t even (Y/n) taking the lead in that, it was all him and he was very confused with his feelings at the moment.

The man turned to Furina. “Is that it for the day?” Neuvillette nodded his head and went back to talking with his coworker.

Once (Y/n) had reached her trailer she locked the door and pressed her back against the wall. She had a hand tangled in her hair, her other hand placed over her beating heart. What the hell was that? She had made out with plenty of people on set for a movie but this was-this was something else entirely. Maybe Diluc didn’t realize how intense he was. He was pressing against her so hard, and the way his lips felt on hers-

She shook her head. He was getting married, it was for the movie. That’s all. They weren’t even that close. They were possibly friends. They went out for lunch and hung out after filming sometimes but that's it. It was for the romance effect, he didn’t see her like that. Even if she secretly wished he would.

—-

(Y/n) was in her trailer, scrolling through her phone. It was her hour break and she intended to take every second of it she could. They had to shoot so many scenes outside in the heat today. It was so hot, almost 100 degrees out. The California heat trying to take out everyone on set. A knock on her door caught her attention and she told whoever it was to come in. The door opened and she saw the familiar red hair.

“Hey ‘Luc.” She greeted him and kept her body on the sofa. The fan was on full blast as she relaxed in her tank top and shorts, one headphone in her ear, and she tapped her fingers to the beat of the music. (Y/n) was grateful to be out of that heavy, stuffy dress that Furina insisted she wore and finally in a cool room, where she could just get a second of rest.

“I barely managed to escape that insufferable woman,” Diluc mumbled while tossing his jacket off, then lifted the woman’s leg and plopped himself down on the sofa. She moved her legs to the spot where they rested before, so they were draped across his lap. “She let you out of your costume as well?” Her eyes looked up from the device in her hand.

“Neuvillette did.” (Y/n) laughed a little and put her phone down, grabbing a hair tie off her wrist and handing it to Diluc. He thanked her and grabbed it, putting his hair in a high ponytail, not caring if Furina would chew him out later for messing up his hair. It had been a good bit of time since they started filming and the two of them were getting rather close. They were attached at the hip when they weren’t on set. The media going wild with allegations, and the friend group laughing at them all.

“One more month of this and then we can finally be done.” He muttered and leaned his head back, feeling the cool fan hit his boiling skin. The redhead had changed into a tank top himself and some cool sweatpants. He was always in that stupid knight costume when he wasn’t in some comfortable clothing. Furina’s orders of course.

“Aw come on, you aren’t going to miss me when this is all over?” (Y/n) lifted her head and gave him a teasing smile. “We can still hang out after this, you know that.” She laughed and sat up, removing her legs from his lap.

“I was comfortable.” He closed his eyes, a frown settling on his face as his friend removed herself. She shrugged her shoulders and walked over to her vanity, tossing her phone on the desk, along with her earbuds.

“Don’t we have to film that cheesy ass sex scene later this week?” The girl had been thinking about it since Furina added it to the script. It was constantly on her mind, it was such an intense scene, not that it would bother her—But the idea of doing something like that with Diluc while she had all these pent-up feelings growing for him. All that she knew was wrong. He was so much fun to be around, he made being out in the heat for hours a day worthwhile. Under that stone-cold demeanor, he was just a soft, funny guy. Furina was tormenting her.

Even if she felt the way she did, the woman needed to be professional about it. So she would bring it up with Diluc now, instead of the day before. To get any of the weirdness out of the way of course.

“I think, why?”

“You aren’t uncomfortable with it or anything are you?” She took her seat back, but this time sitting next to the man and leaning her head against his shoulder. The two of them had gotten pretty comfortable with physical touch at this point during shooting. They were pretty up close and personal every day, hands-on with one another, whether it be for filming or helping each other fix their costumes. So they just naturally began to lean on one another. She had grown pretty fond of her friend and because of that, she didn’t want any weird sex scene to ruin what they had.

“Not really, the movies I’ve been in have a lot of sex in them,” He rolled his eyes at the thought. Jean always teased him about, how the women were always so nervous to film them and how Diluc looked like he would rather be anywhere else in between shots. This time she didn’t pick on him too much, but he didn’t find it weird she was probably too busy with her own things to annoy him. There were a lot of weird things going on with Jean at the moment if he thought about it.

“Okay so then you’re all good?”

“I’ll be fine but what about you? I figured you would have filmed one before.” He peeked open an eye and looked down at her, “I have, I just wanted to make sure you were okay with it.” The redhead nodded and closed his eyes again, throwing an arm lazily around his friend. When he first started filming the movie with her he was weary of the girl. She was bubbly and friendly and never stopped talking. He was the exact opposite of that, so he didn’t think they would get along too well. Then Jean invited her to dinner with them and once they got to talking they found out how much they had in common. From the literature they read to the music they listened to. Their views on the world in general seemed to line up.

He enjoyed having conversations with her, ones that weren’t shallow and meaningless. For once he could talk about stuff that didn’t involve acting and fame. That didn’t revolve around his career and the industry. It was, well, refreshing. He enjoyed being around her, spending time with her felt like a break from everything else in his life.

“It won’t be awkward if that’s what you’re thinking,” (Y/n) nodded weakly and leaned into his touch. Her mind drifted back to that kiss they shared while filming a few weeks ago. The memory gave her butterflies and she felt the heat rise to her face again. The two of them hadn’t discussed it since, they just went about their normal routine pretending like it wasn’t anything special. Even if she wanted it to be. Like right now, she was so close to Diluc, and he was so comfortable with it. It probably meant nothing to him but to her, it meant a lot. She wanted to ask him about that day on set yet the fear of destroying their friendship stopped her. It was probably all in her head, he was getting married for fucks sake.

“I didn’t think it would be,”

“Did Furina mention that dinner to you this weekend? I think we’re supposed to meet with the production team to set up interviews.” Diluc was still in his spot, unmoving as he talked. (Y/n) just couldn’t help but stare at him, how he was so relaxed around her, how he didn’t mind the close contact. But her heart was aching thinking how this could all mean nothing to him and she could just be crazy.

“I need to ask you something.” The words blurted out of her mouth, ignoring Diluc’s previous sentence. She wasn’t even sure what she was going to say, or how to even explain it—But when she said those words, her tone must have worried the man because he instantly sat up his eyes opening. “Is everything okay?” He removed his arm from around her and gave a concerned look.

“I’m not sure, I just-I just wanted to ask you about a few weeks ago.” She looked over at the clock on her wall. They still had about 45 minutes left til they had to be back in costume on set. “We had that intense makeout scene and it was-”

“It was kinda different than what I usually experience, I mean it’s your first romance movie so I know you probably aren’t too sure what you’re doing. I just didn’t want to keep thinking these silly thoughts that it wasn’t just for the movie that you-” As she was trying to get out the word vomit in her brain she felt Diluc move. Then suddenly his lips were mashed on hers. The girl’s heart skipped a beat as she felt his body move, and pull her closer to him. Her mind grew clouded and a dizzy feeling swept over her. It was different than the scripted kisses she had, but so similar to that one moment on set when he kissed her. She couldn’t relax in his touch, her whole body was tense as the voice in the back of her brain screamed at her to pull away.

But she didn’t have to, he did that for her. He pulled away as quickly as he kissed her. His eyes darkened and he looked so confused himself. “I’m sorry, I have no idea why I did that.” Diluc glanced up at her, seeing her red face. But he saw more than the blush spreading across her cheeks. He couldn’t help but stare at her bright (e/c) eyes, and how they seemed to shine in the light, the way she bit her bottom lip with so much anxiety. He just couldn’t help it. But she was so quiet and stared at him with such a look he couldn’t place.

“I’m, sorry, I should get going now.” He stood up, trying to leave before he could do any more damage, but he stopped in his tracks, feeling his wrist being pulled. He turned his head to see her still sitting down, her head tilted up “Don’t.” Her pleading eyes begged him to stay. “You don’t have to,” She gripped his wrist tighter and tugged on him a bit more. He’ll be damned if he walked out now.

He moved to sit on the sofa, her hand still holding his wrist so tightly, and even if he wanted to, he couldn’t resist the urge. The minute she was face to face with him, he threw all of fucks out the window. Diluc pulled her towards him, so she was now sitting on his lap straddling him. He pressed his lips against hers again and felt her hands grip his shoulders so tightly, her nails digging into his skin. He was intoxicated with her. They were always so close on set but with just the two of them, it felt so different. He could smell the sweet perfume she wore, and taste the strawberry chapstick she would use often. It was a different experience. One he wanted more of.

His hands started to move up her arms and down her back, just barely gripping her waist, and he pulled her tighter against his body, getting a small mewl out of her. She was sweet and addicting like this.

Her body was starting to relax under his touch, and with each passing second, she felt herself start to melt the more he touched her. His hands moved to cup her ass and grind against her. Her head rested against his shoulder, trying to hide the embarrassing blush on her face, and the sounds she tried to choke down.

Even if her head was fuzzy, and her body was growing hot, she knew she couldn’t do this. He was engaged. To a very sweet woman. A sweet woman who trusted her a lot, and made her one of her bridesmaids. Suddenly she snapped back to her senses. What was she doing? She was being a home wrecker. “Diluc-mm-wait we can’t-” She tried to get the words out between each gasp, and it was so hard to as each time she spoke, he would grab her waist, and gently rock her body against his. God, it was so hard to stop. “You’re engaged I shouldn’t have-” He paused his actions, his hand leaving her waist, and moving to grab her chin making her face him.

He pressed a kiss against her lips before he spoke.“Who’s gonna know?” The man wasn’t wrong. Who would know? She felt him grab her thighs, and his lips were back at it again. She started to forget about the issue she was so concerned about moments ago as she felt Diluc bite her bottom lip.--The action making her part hers just slightly. Enough for him to slip his tongue in. The movement from before resumed as they grinded against one another.

The redhead grabbed at the ends of her shirt and tugged at the fabric trying to remove it from her body. They pulled apart for a moment, and she left her arms as he took the item off her, tossing it somewhere on the ground. His hands immediately explored the exposed skin. His gaze on her body was so intense, she had to turn her head away. “Stop staring,” The words came out in a mumble.

“You’re acting as if this is the first time I've seen you in a bra.” He laughed a little, and moved his lips to her neck, placing gentle kisses as he went down her chest.

He had seen her like this, a few times on set during some scenes. She wasn’t embarrassed then because it was all scripted, this was different.

He finally reached near her breast and stopped, gently nipping at her skin there. She let out another sound, cursing at herself. “Diluc we don’t have enough time for this,” Even if she wanted to keep going, they had to be back soon.

We have 30 minutes that's enough for a-”

“I’m a virgin.” The words left her mouth suddenly and her eyes still looked away from Diluc. She was embarrassed about it, and as much as she wanted to despite her conscious yelling at her not to, she didn’t want her first time to be a quickie.

That was enough to make the redhead freeze and pull away from her. His hands dropped from her breast to her thighs, thumbing over them softly as he chuckled to himself. He found it kind of ironic that the romance actor was a virgin. He wasn’t judging but it was just a little funny to him. But it also let him realize what the two could have done. “Don’t laugh! I told you I’ve never dated!” She buried her head in the crook of his, her body resting against his.

“I’m not laughing at you. I promise I’m sorry I didn’t know.” A knock at the door made them both turn their heads and stop. “(Y/n), we need you on set early! I know this is your break but-” The door was about to open and the female jumped from her spot and ran to the door. Just barely catching it before it could fully open to reveal Diluc in the room. Furina was on the other side, a brow raised as she looked at the actress.

“What are you doing?” She asked looking her up and down. The female was panting and dressed in her bra and shorts.

“It’s really hot out there okay, anyways I’m getting dressed I’ll be out in a minute.” Furina sighed and spun around, telling her to find Diluc and drag him back out as well. (Y/n) took a deep breath and shut the door, her eyes turning to the redhead on the sofa.

“This never happened got it?”

“Never happened.”

—-

(Y/n) sat in her chair on set, glasses covering her eyes, as she tried her best not to fall asleep. She was watching the actors in front of her go through their scenes. The man playing the king shooting his big reveal, with a few of the other main characters in the movie, joining in on the big plot twist. She sighed and fanned herself with a magazine, it was beyond hot, even for it being dark out–she was still burning up. So Furina the wonderful director she was, let the girl dress down into her tank top and shorts. As she was dying in the heat, some type of commotion faintly behind her caught her attention. She turned to see Diluc in his day clothes walking away from a furious Jean. It seemed like they were arguing about something. The blonde was holding a planner in her hand, and pointing to it.

“You can’t be serious right now? You aren’t going to help me in the slightest?” Diluc sighed heavily and glared at his partner. “Jean you got everything under control, this movie is my main priority.” His red eyes glanced ahead to see (Y/n) eyeing the two of them, and he looked away quickly. The movie wasn’t his main priority, she was. (Y/n) had consumed his mind ever since that moment in the trailer. It was all he could think about, her body, her voice, her laugh. It consumed him so much that whenever Jean did anything it got on his nerves. Everything she did was annoying him—especially the wedding planning. Every time he went back to her place she just wanted to talk about the wedding, and the guest list, and the food. Suddenly he didn’t care for any of it.

So Jean picked up on that within the first night and instead tried other things to do with him. Movies, dates, shopping trips. It all seemed like that annoyed him even more. Then she thought maybe he was stressed and needed to blow off steam so she tried to have sex with him and it just–He wasn’t up for it. All he could think about was his co-star. And if Diluc wouldn’t talk to her about at home then she would fight him at work, trying to figure out what his issue was. Why he was so mean to her?

“Diluc I swear if you don’t knock your shit off I’m calling off the wedding.”

“I’m at work can we talk about this later?” The blonde stormed off flipping him off as she walked away. His gaze returned to the girl watching him from the set. She gave him a pity smile and then frowned. He just waved to her and walked off, she supposed to his trailer. “Hey, Furina can I go for the night?”

“Hm? Yea! Your scenes are done for the day, but tomorrow, phew, you have a heated day.” She shot the actress a wink, and (Y/n) just rolled her eyes. She left her magazine behind and started to make her way to her friend's trailer but-

“(Y/n) can we talk?” Her head spun to see Jean approaching her. She swallowed thickly and nodded. God if she suspected anything, then she was done for. She had never done anything like this before, all her other co-stars weren’t like Diluc. She didn’t know what was different about him. His looks were great sure but it was so much more than that. Like how his laugh was so enchanting and his rare smile made her heart flutter, or how they could talk for hours about anything.

“And I have no idea what’s going on with him, but do you think you could talk to him?” The girl snapped back and looked at Jean wide-eyed. What did she say? “What? You want me to-”

“Check on him, you two get along so well and he can get so in his head. I trust you so let me know what’s up okay? I’m heading home, send him my way when you're done here.” Oh god, she was a horrible person. The female just nodded her head. “Of course, I’ll text you.” Jean smiled and hugged her, thanking her for being such a good friend. (Y/n) was going to throw up. So once the woman left, she looked over to the trailer at the back of the lot and started to make her way over.

She didn’t even knock as she entered the trailer. She scanned the freezing room for the man, and instantly spotted him in the back, laying face down on the mattress. The lights were off, and Diluc was well hidden in his sheets, but (Y/n) could spot his striking red hair from anywhere. She sighed, walking over to his bed, and crawling onto the plush surface next to him.

“You’re not getting along?” The words came out as a mumble. “We are not getting along.” The two were lying in opposite directions of each other, staring at the wall. The moment they shared in her trailer earlier this week wasn’t a one-off thing. It seemed every time they were left alone, whether that be on set or in their private dressing rooms, they were on top of one another. It was getting to a boiling point where (Y/n) couldn’t take anymore. She was so fucking pent-up.

“Is it because of me?”

“Not exactly,” He glanced over at the female who had a worried look in her eyes. “It’s more than that. We’ve been drifting apart for a while.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.” Diluc turned his body to face (Y/n), but she was still looking away from him. He lazily threw his arm around her torso and pulled her close, burying his face in the back of her neck. She relaxed in his hold, even if she felt sick to her stomach at the thought of Jean. She had asked her to talk to him, not fuck him. But he was here, so close to her, and she couldn’t help it. She was falling hard for the man.

“She asked me to talk to you, try and make you work it out with her, but I don’t want to.” (Y/n) wanted him for herself, she had never felt this way about anyone. He had taken her heart, and she didn’t mind it.

“Even if I don’t want you to, you should fix things.” She turned her body to face him, his red eyes piercing her (e/c) ones. Her heart started to beat rapidly as they stared at one another, basking in each other's hold. “I don’t care to,”

“Diluc, this is wrong and you know that,”

“You could put a stop to it, but you don’t.” She groaned and lightly bonked her forehead against his. He just gave her a weak laugh and pressed a kiss against her lips. “Because every time I tell you we shouldn’t do this, you do that.” They hadn’t gone much farther than a heated makeout session, and feeling each other up–the girl being way too shy to do more. She especially didn’t want her first time to be in a trailer at work.

She got a weak hum out of him and he smirked a bit. “Do you wanna get out of here?” Her body froze. “To where?”

“My place?” She swallowed thickly and blinked a few times. She would be completely alone with Diluc, nobody to interrupt them. If she was at his place she might cave and take things way farther with him. But as much as she knew she shouldn’t she agreed.

—

(Y/n) threw her shirt off as Diluc kissed her relentlessly, his hands roaming every part of her body that he could get it. Tugging her pants off as she fell back onto the bed, their lips being apart for only seconds. His tongue already found its way into her mouth, teeth clanking at the fast-paced movements. They couldn’t help it, the moment they got into his house they were on top of one another, the tension from the week building up. She wanted Diluc so badly, and even if she knew the amount of shit this would cause, she would do it. The man didn’t seem like he cared either, his hands finding the clasps of her bra and undoing it.

She grabbed his shirt and tugged at it signaling she wanted it to come off. The man did as she wanted, and (Y/n) began to shrug off her bra throwing it onto the floor, her hands going back on Diluc’s body. Her fingers gripped the waist band of his pants, pulling him towards her. She gasped as she felt his hard-on press against her. The girl was about to open her mouth to speak but the two froze as they heard her phone ring. She groaned and reached for it, Diluc wanted to stop her but she had already grabbed the damn thing.

“It’s Jean.”

“Answer it,”

“Are you crazy? Hey no-” The man grabbed the phone from her and pressed the green button, handing it back. She glared at him, as she watched him lower himself, pulling her panties off as the phone was pressed against her ear. “Hey, what's up?” She was about to lift her head to see what the idiot was doing but she instantly tensed up at the feeling of something wet licking her clit. It took everything in her to not moan.

“Did you talk to Diluc? His phone is off and I’m worried about him.” Her voice was filled with concern and she sounded like she was driving. “Mm-Mhm! Yea I-uh” She covered her mouth and pulled the phone away. Her back arched as felt him swipe his tongue over her clit again, but he slowed pace this time, teasing her so she would make more sounds. More sounds that only he got to hear. “Are you okay?” Jean’s voice brought her back and she panted for a second.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m working out right now. I needed to get my cardio in.” She laughed a little but stopped when she felt her partner insert a finger inside of her. One of her hands grabbed his red locks, and tugged at them slightly, rocking her hips against him. She could hear him laugh as he went on with his current task, curling his fingers inside of her. The way she was choking back her cute moans, and gasp. The woman was barely keeping herself together at this point and he didn’t even care if Jean heard the two of them. This was the most fun he has had in a while. He couldn’t help but stare at her, seeing the phone pressed against her ear, her hip eagerly bucking towards him begging for more.

“But yeah, I uhm talked to him before I left, he said-fuck.” She swore as Diluc pumped another finger inside of her. “What’s wrong?”

“He was upset, and told me he didn’t want to talk.” She couldn’t keep this up for much longer, she wanted so much more of the man, this wasn’t enough. “Was he rude to you?” The blonde’s voice held sympathy for her, knowing how cold he could be when he was upset.

“Yeah, I just let him be.”

“I should go see him, I’m on my way already.” (Y/n) lifted her head and looked at Diluc who didn’t pay any mind to the girl and kept his pace playing with her sensitive bundle of nerves.

“I wouldn’t do that, he-ah shit-uhm wanted to be alone. I need to go just don’t trust me.” (Y/n) hung up the phone and tossed the device on the bed and let out a string of curses at the man.

“You idiot she’s on her way here-fuck Diluc please-”

“She doesn’t have a key, it's fine.”

The girl just sighed and grabbed his arm tugging him close to her. He hovered above her, his arms resting on the mattress. “Do you want to go any farther?” She nodded her head. If she didn’t get more of this man, she would go crazy. “I don’t know how to do anything though.”

“I’ll take care of it, just relax.”

—-

It was the final week of filming and the affair that (Y/n) had with Diluc was going to end. She couldn’t keep doing this to her friend. Jean had trusted her so much and went to her to vent about Diluc and she just couldn’t help but feel terrible. As she should though. Even if she had was more than just lust, even if she felt something more for the man, it had to be over. They had already filmed the rated R scene and everyone was surprised at how well they got through it, like it was no big deal. It shocked even Jean a little bit, mainly because the girl was telling her how nervous she was to film it. But when the time came the two got through it as if they had done it before

(Y/n) huffed in her chair and looked at Furina giving a speech to all of the cast members. Most of the scenes were done and Diluc was no longer needed. She wasn’t really either, but the two stayed just in case something came up. Her eyes looked around the room, and she could see her co-star near the back, once again fighting with his fiance. The two angrily whispering to one another. She just frowned and looked away. They were always butting heads about something, whenever the woman was on set Diluc was miserable. Even if he would tell (Y/n) how badly he wanted to end it, he didn’t The wedding date was set for next year and the plans were put in place. Everyone he knew had already been informed and Jean was getting new gigs because of it.

Internally she was screaming, begging Diluc to just leave the woman, and let himself be happy. Yet if he didn’t and this was it then she had to live with that. “So, thank you everyone for being a part of this movie! The curtain will soon be closing!” The female took a bow, and everyone clapped. (Y/n) lazily moved her hands together, unaware of the person sneaking up behind her. Then without warning, someone placed their hands on the girl’s shoulders and she let out a screech. Her loud yelping sound caught everyone’s attention but most importantly Diluc’s. But the laughing sound that followed calmed everyone down.

The (h/c) haired girl whipped her head around to see the cackling man behind her. An angry expression started to form on her face as she glared at the dark-haired man “Kaeya!” She shot him the best glare she could and jumped out of her seat. “Not funny,” Her eyes looked behind him to see Tartaglia waving to her from the back of the lot. She shyly waved back to him and smiled. It had been a while since she saw their ginger friend. He was traveling for a modeling gig he booked. The three of them were known to be a close-knit group but since she started this movie they hadn’t been spotted together. Diluc had taken up all her time.

“What are you idiots doing here?” She placed both of her hands on her hips, seeming pretty peeved with Kaeya. “It’s your last week on set, Furina said we could come to hang with you.” She rolled her eyes and glanced behind her to see the cast getting back to work, but the red eyes on the other side of the set never left her.

“Come on princess, let's go get lunch or something.” Kaeya walked over to his friend and wrapped his arms around her shoulders. “I can’t just leave the set, what if they need me for something?”

He laughed and pressed a kiss against her cheek smiling, both of them knowing that wasn’t true. “Come on we have to catch up, you’ve been stirring some drama in the news.” (Y/n) sighed and shoved her best friend off and looked to see Diluc approaching them, an annoyed Jean following behind.

He looked so fucking pissed to see Kaeya anywhere near her. Tartaglia had also made his way over here and the girl didn’t seem to notice as he draped both his arms around her shoulders. Hovering behind her. “Heya girly.” She tilted her head back and smiled at the man. “Hey, Ajax.”

“Kaeya what the hell are you doing here?” Diluc’s voice caught the trio's attention. “I’m here to see my friend, not you.” He gestured to (Y/n).

“Great you’ve seen her, now leave.”

Jean smacked his arm lightly and glared. “Those are her friends, just because you don’t like Kaeya doesn’t mean you can be rude.” Kaeya stuck his tongue out and grabbed (Y/n)’s hand. “Lunch? Me, you, Childe?” Before she could decline she was being dragged away, mouthing a sorry to the couple in front of her.

—-

(Y/n) laid next to Diluc eyes glued to the ceiling. The man was passed out next to her and she had this gut-wrenching feeling in her chest. She wanted to cry knowing that this was it. This was the last day on set and they decided to spend the night together, but after this, it was over. The man never said it was but, she knew in her heart it was. He would have free time and no excuse to be with her. I mean how was Diluc supposed to justify the two of them being alone together? Jean basically had him on a leash as is. One time after she left Diluc’s place Jean was over shortly after. She had told (Y/n) she found a pair of underwear that was not the blondes. She confided in her friend, her worries about her fiance cheating. Ever since then, Jean would never let him hang out with people alone. Never anyone but her. Because the she trusted her.

She felt like crying at the thought of all of it. Jean invited her to go dress shopping cake tasting, and all the fun things that came along with wedding planning. (Y/n) would nod her head and agree feeling this intense guilt inside. Didn’t Diluc feel any of it? Probably not, he enjoyed it or something. But after this. She couldn’t do it anymore, she wanted him all to herself. She didn’t want to hide him from everyone. All she wanted was him.

So after confiding in Kaeya and Tartaglia, they told her to just break it off after filming. She was only going to hurt herself more in the long run, and if nobody knew about then stop before someone did. Both of her friends were right, and that’s why she made up her mind. Even if this was going to crush her. (Y/n) had truly fallen for him.

The girl sat up and got her things together. She didn’t want to stay here, it would be worse in the morning when he was awake, begging her to stay. Why would she do this herself? From the moment this started, she knew that he wouldn’t pick her. She was fooling herself into thinking that Diluc would leave Jean for her. The two had been together for almost ten years now, they were high school sweethearts. (Y/n) hurried along ignoring the tears falling down her cheeks. This really was it.

—-

“Welcome to the premiere of Betrayal at Dusk,” Furina and Neuvillette were standing on a stage, people mingling around the room. It was the first showing of the new movie that (Y/n) had starred in with Diluc. One whole year later The girl hadn’t seen him since that day in his apartment. When she left while he was sleeping, so she didn’t cave for him. So ignoring all that she tried her best to prepare herself for tonight. She had to get Kaeya to tag along to keep her from being stupid. It didn’t matter though, because the moment she stepped out of the limo and onto the red carpet, the man was straight ahead of her. Jean attached to his arm smiling wide. She looked so perfect next to him, her wedding ring shining with all the camera flashes. His arm wrapped so tightly around her. They look happy and it made her want to vomit.

Once she got to the door of the venue a few reporters were crowding her.

“(Y/n) Who are you wearing? Is it Dior?”

“What was it like to star in the first romance movie featuring Diluc Ragvandir?”

“People are saying how raw and passionate the scenes are how did you two form such a bond?”

“Are the cheating rumors true?”

She answered each one carefully, trying not to make a mess she would regret later, and somehow she managed to debunk all of the rumors. At some point she was able to make her way inside, Kaeya at her side leading her around to chat with everyone. It worked for most of the night and even made her forget the reality of the situation for a minute. Yet, she found herself glancing around the room for him. “Don’t worry he’ll avoid you like the plague if I’m here.” (Y/n) just nodded her head and grabbed another drink. She noticed Jean trying to pull him towards her a few times, but failing. He waved in dismal at her idea to go greet the girl. He looked rather annoyed, and it crushed her.

She wanted to go home, she didn’t want to come to this but her friends made her, and it was the first showing so. A sigh escaped her lip and she handed her drink to Kaeya. “I’m going out for air.”

“You want me to come?”

“No,” She turned and walked away from him, and tried her best to find an area outside that wasn’t crowded. Yet everywhere she went it was packed with people, and each time they saw her they couldn’t help but strike up a conversation with the female. It was getting on her nerves that she couldn’t find a place to escape just for a bit.

Eventually, she wound up in an empty hallway near the back of the venue, the lights off, and it was quiet. She could just breathe for a minute. Clear her head, and then she would get back to the main party. No matter how hard she tried to forget the past year, and pretend like she didn’t have an affair with Diluc, it was pointless.

She couldn’t even escape for a second though, being interrupted again.

“Why are you hiding back here?” Her gaze turned towards the familiar voice, and she saw the man who caused all of these emotions.

“I needed to think,” She stood up from the plush seat she was in, debating on heading back to the party. “You haven’t returned any of my calls.” He approached her, reaching his hand out to grab hers.

“Don’t do that.” (Y/n) could feel her heart being squeezed at the mere thought of him touching her again.

“I haven’t heard from you, I miss yo-”

“Don’t say anything please.” She jerked her wrist away before he could even lay a finger on her, tears welling up in her eyes. The girl didn’t even know why she was upset over this, she knew this was going to happen. It was a fling for him. He loved Jean, not her. He didn’t have the same feelings for her as she did for him. Not once did he ever mention that he liked her, or even wanted more than just a quick fuck. A year had passed and she hadn’t texted, called, or even thought about visiting him. No matter how many times Jean tried to get the two to hang out, she would go running at the sight of him. It made the blonde suspect something but she didn’t say a word. Because (Y/n) wouldn’t do that, (Y/n) was a good friend.

“Just hear me out.”

“I don’t want to, I knew you were never going to leave her, it wasn’t anything more for you. But for me, it was something else entirely. I had feelings for you, I have feelings for you. I just-I can’t believe I thought you would choose me over her. I’m so stupid.” The sound of footsteps approaching made her quickly wipe her face and storm off. As she went she saw the blonde she was incredibly jealous of pass by. “(Y/n) Hi!”

She gave her a little wave and kept walking, and she didn’t stop. Not for Kaeya, not for anyone. She wanted to go home and pretend this didn’t happen.

—-

“I’m sorry Furina I can’t come back for a sequel, I know it did well.” (Y/n) paced her apartment as she was on the phone with her friend. The girl was asking for her to come back and film another movie in the series. If she did that then she had to be around Diluc again.

“Is it the pay? I can pay so much more than that if you want, or is it the heat? I can film it in the winter, oh please (Y/n), they loved you, and they loved Diluc with you.”

“That’s the problem, Diluc is the problem.” She leaned against her bedroom wall and sank to the floor. Her heart aching at the memories from last year. “Wait, were the rumors true?”

“Mhm,”

“Oh (Y/n).” The girl brushed away the tears that started to fall, sniffling, trying her best to keep it together. “I’m sorry Furina, I can’t”

—

“You what?!” Jean was screaming at Diluc as he stood there. The blonde overheard the phone call with Furina he had, and the other woman also screaming at him for the whole thing with (Y/n). It wasn’t exactly how he wanted Jean to find out, he never really did want her to find out. Honestly, he was planning on breaking it off after the movie, but Jean kept getting more and more offers from different agencies and he didn’t want to ruin that for her. Then before he knew it a year rolled by and he couldn’t back out now. The wedding was in a few weeks.

“I cheated on you with (Y/n), it just happened. I don’t know.”

“How could you? I trusted you, I trusted her. This whole time, you never thought to tell me?” The blonde was furious, tears in her eyes as she glared at her fiance. “It wasn’t her fault it was mine, she tried to stop but I just couldn’t.” Jean rolled her eyes, and more tears rolled down her face as she grabbed her keys.

“You can forget about the damn wedding.”

—-

(Y/n) sat at her favorite coffee shop scrolling on her phone happily as she waited for a friend. The news had already hit the magazines and press about her affair with Diluc. It was insane at how big it blew up. Most of her friends came asking for her side of the story and she didn’t lie. She knew she was guilty but they all sided with her in the end. She was moving on from all of that though. Her career was getting bigger and bigger and she decided she wanted to do more than just romance movies, she was taking a break from them.

Even though Furina begged her every week to make a sequel for the movie. She always told her the same answer. No.

It always upset the girl but she wouldn’t take no for an answer. Repeatedly coming back with new offers or bribes for her. Nothing on the planet could make her want to go back and film with Diluc. “Sorry, I’m late.” (Y/n) looked up and saw Childe waiting in front of her. “Ready to go?” She got up and grabbed her drink smiling happily as the ginger wrapped an arm around her.

“Yea! Where are we going for our date?”

#diluc ragnvindr x reader #diluc x reader #genshin x reader #diluc headcanons #fanfic writers #genshin impact x reader #diluc x reader headcanons #diluc x reader smut #diluc smut #diluc ragnvindr #diluc x you #kaeya alberich #genshin diluc #smut #movie au #celeb au

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sonicenvy · 1 year ago

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So I was poking around through my followers list and I noticed that there are a few of you who have no title, no profile picture, no custom site and no bio who do have enough likes to make me think you might be a real person and not a bot. If you are indeed a real person, please read this post.

If I click on you and your blog looks like this:

you look like a bot, yes even if you have a substantial amount of likes.

It is very easy to make yourself look human, and because I'm feeling helpful and chatty today, I'm going to show you how to do that, with screenshots. I even went on this site in safari where I don't have dashboardunfucker set up to take these screenshots, so you know I'm feeling good today.

Step 1:

In your sidebar go to "account" highlighted in blue below:

Step 2:

Select your blog in the drop down. (There are a bunch of blogs on mine because I have multiple junk side blogs.) For the purpose of this exercise I made a brand new blank one called imtotallyabot56789.

Step 3:

Go to "blog settings" in the right hand sidebar. This will take you to a new page.

Step 4:

On that new page, select "edit appearance".

Step 5:

Get to editing! I've highlighted for you the 4 most important things you need to change to not be a bot.

Those things are:

your icon

your header

your title & bio

you banner/bio colors

Some notes:

Your banner can be a .gif, a .png or a .jpg. It is best at a 16:9 ratio. I can't remember how big mine was, but a little bit bigger is better so that it displays decently on desktop and on mobile.

Your icon/profile picture should be a square. I think it displays at 128x128, but I don't know for sure. Use a bigger image than that though. Mine is apparently 886x886 at 72 ppi. Don't pick a photo of yourself unless there's something interesting about it (ie: you're in cosplay or something) because a regularass photo of a person looks like a bot as well. If you don't know what to pick, you can head over to picrew and use an icon generator there to create an icon. There are a lot of fun options. If you want to design your own and don't have photoshop or something like that, check out photopea which is an in browser photoshop clone. Have fun with this -- pick a character you like or a pretty image. Like whatever you want just don't stick with the default one. Use either a jpg or a png.

Your title doesn't have to be that deep. Or descriptive. A lot of people use lines from books, music, poetry, tv or movies for theirs. Mine is related to Elizabeth Warren ("Nevertheless She Persisted"). I've previously used "Death Cannot Stop True Love" and "This could be a little more sonic"

Your bio also doesn't have to be long or, like describe anything super detailed about you. The beauty of tumblr dot hell is that it is one of the more anonymous social media sites out on the internet. You could literally just put something like "Fandom Lurker". Just have something.

The banner/bio colors just change the color of the border around your header image/icon "background" and the accent color.

Step 6:

Some additional basic (optional) things to do:

Enable "Custom Theme". This gives you an actual website rather than the dumb little tumblr dot com/blog/yourblognamehere thing that you get by default. The advantages to having an actual yourblognamehere dot tumblr dot com website are numerous. I made a whole post about that with instructions on how to do that. (note that the screenshots in that post were made before the tumblr layout change that was tumblr staff copying twitter's homework). A big benefit to having your own site is that it is easier to find tagged posts on a site because the default search that tumblr has on the /blog/yourblognamehere thing is hot flaming garbage and pulls posts that don't have that tag whilst also missing ones that do. with a yourblognamehere dot tumblr dot com site you can simply go to yourblognamehere(dot)tumblr(dot)com/tagged/mycooltag and see all the tagged posts. Dooo this. you know you want to doooo this.

2. Open your ask box and turn off tumblr affiliate links. Asks can be fun. They can also be terrible. You can always turn them off later if you decide that people are being mean to you. Personally I have not had that problem in the 12 years I've been here. Maybe it's just the relative obscurity of this blog? who knows. glad for that though.

3. Add some featured tags.

This is a newer setting but I think it's fun. If you make posts (or reblog lots of posts) you can add a few tags that you use very often to this as little shortcuts for people visiting your blog.

Whew! That's all for today folks! Thanks for coming to my tumblr how to for newbies talk. I'll probably post another tumblr for newbies chat at some point.

with love and light,

💚 your local internet crazy lady slash tumblr oldtimer

Be kind to yourself and someone else today!

#tumblr #tumblr how to #how to tumblr #tumblr for new users #tumblr tips #tumblr tutorials #tumblr for newbies series #long post for ts

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lynxnothinks2 · 11 months ago

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FR Fanart Stats

Have you ever wondered which FR dragons are the most popular to draw? No? Well clearly you're not a university student with looming deadlines, a severe procrastination problem and unlimited access to research grade statistics software let's dive in

Originally I was doing this to see which dragons I'd drawn the most for commissions over the years, but then I got curious generally about if the popularity of dragon breeds correlated with the amount of fanart produced. We artists are always fighting algorithms and trends, so this info may be useful to those of us looking to utilise them!

A brief intro/some disclaimers to the data:

I've only included modern breeds as they are more numerous than ancients on-site, have been around for less time (excl. Obelisks) and Excel was already protesting with what I had so I saved myself the headache. Look forward to the ancient breed sequel ahahahah :P that's a joke i'm not doing this again

For my 'tumblr popularity' data, I counted the breed of dragon of the first 100 featured in the '#flight rising art' tag. I excluded ancients and any unidentifiable breeds. Each individual dragon was counted in multi-image posts, unless if the dragon(s) in question were in a comic, series etc. in which case each unique dragon was counted once.

Assuming my personal commission stats are the least interesting to most people, but I'll give some background. I started doing comms in mid-2018, producing art at a relatively impressive volume (rip my time and motivation.) I do a lot less FR art now, but if we assume breed popularity has stayed consistent since then the only breed this should really effect are Obelisks as the newbies.

And then finally, on-site breed popularity. I used the dragon search feature on FR to identify the number of named, active dragons for each breed. Total dragons as of 27/01/24, if you were curious: 12,924,070! That's a lot of guys!!

I threw everything into percentages, then made a graph. it's got issues probably but my degree isn't in niche pixel dragon info and i was getting bored at this point

I ran some stuff through statistical tests but they don't show anything remarkable that you can't see in the graph. Rstudio claimed a few more years from my lifespan for naught

Conclusions:

Skydancers and Imperials are crazy popular in all categories, but SDs are Tumblr's favourite

Obelisks and Ridgebacks do disproportionately well on Tumblr compared to their site popularity

Snappers and Bogsneaks are pretty unpopular across the board. I've never drawn either! But at least snaps are getting a bit of love on here

The popularity of Faes and Guardians on-site is not significantly reflected in fanart (excl. Guardian comms for me which is? an odd outlier??)

Mirrors and Nocturnes are not popular on Tumblr - found the latter interesting as I thought there may be lingering bias from NotN, but apparently not

Coatls, Pearlcatchers, Spirals and Tundras are pretty consistent between categories. Nothing really of note for these guys except for less people wanting me to draw spirals (good they're complicated)

I could draw a Wildclaw with my eyes closed and although that will not make me popular, it can make me money

Well that was a good use of 4 hours I'm going to write my essay now

and if you'd like to show your support for this cool art stats guy check out my main @lynxnothinks commissions are open thank you byeee

#flight rising #fr art #flight rising art #ramblynx

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waitmyturtles · 9 months ago

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Turtles Catches Up With Old GMMTV: KinnPorsche, and Analyzing the KP Cultural Zeitgeist Edition (Part 2)

[What’s going on here? After joining Tumblr and discovering Thai BLs through KinnPorsche in 2022, I began watching GMMTV’s new offerings -- and realized that I had a lot of history to catch up on, to appreciate the more recent works that I was delving into. From tropes to BL frameworks, what we’re watching now hails from somewhere, and I’m learning about Thai BL's history through what I’m calling the Old GMMTV Challenge (OGMMTVC). Starting with recommendations from @absolutebl on their post regarding how GMMTV is correcting for its mistakes with its shows today, I’ve made an expansive list to get me through a condensed history of essential/classic/significant Thai BLs produced by GMMTV and many other BL studios. My watchlist, pasted below, lists what I’ve watched and what’s upcoming, along with the reviews I’ve written so far. Today, I conclude a two-part series on my thoughts on KinnPorsche, my very first Thai BL, and the impact that I think KP has had on the Thai BL industry since 2022.]

Top of the morning (or whatever time zone you're in) to ya! Yesterday, I ruminated on KinnPorsche's foundation in regards to how the show wasn't as innovative as newbie members of the Thai BL fandom, like myself, may have thought in 2022 -- but was rather a great example of a show that derivatively used a lot of excellent past Thai BL influences in order to make a newly stylized show that I think, for the most part, worked well.

Harkening back to the outline for these two pieces that I laid out yesterday, this post will concentrate on:

3) How I think KP has impacted how other studios approach, market, and write Thai BLs now, and 4) A quick passing thought on BOC's own continued influence on the Thai BL genre and industry since 2022, particularly by way of Dead Friend Forever.

Before I get fully into point 3, I wanted to take a second to offer one more thought on an element about the KinnPorsche series itself that I didn't unwind on much yesterday, and one that'll connect with point 3 in a second. I mentioned yesterday that I personally (in my own opinion, I am accountable here) don't think that some of the VegasPete elements of the show helped the show's flow and continuity at all times. After my rewatch, I think the show could have stood for more episode editing to better its flow. I very much know how beloved VegasPete are in much of the KP fandom (thanks so much to dear friend @wen-kexing-apologist for the conversations about this during my rewatch!), so I don't want to pooh-pooh very hard, because at the same time, I think Bible as an actor was valuable to the show regarding Vegas's interactions with Porsche -- that side storyline offered intrigue and depth particularly into Porsche's mindset at the end of the series. At the same time, I think the VegasPete scenes contained enough questionable takes on trauma and attraction that I think now contribute to the show's legend and status as a uniquely heaty drama, but (in my opinion, people, I own this!), I think some of those takes could have been removed, smoothed, or tamped down for editing's sake, vis à vis those questionable takes in particular.

Taking VegasPete's trauma-and-kink-driven storyline, and KinnPorsche's romps and unravellings, into consideration, along with the show's excellent use of comedy as a plot driver: I think that KinnPorsche has clearly had an impact on how subsequent "heat" BL dramas have been created and marketed since KP's run. I'm thinking in particularly of some big ones (heh heh), including 2023's Only Friends, and 2023-24's Playboyy (which I did not finish, FYI).

Heat -- and the increasing use and management of it -- has long been an important element of the Thai BL industry. Like I said yesterday, MaxTul (my beloved) were pioneers of it in Together With Me and Manner of Death, and MAME consecrated episodic heat in 2019's TharnType, and even introduced enough of it notably in 2018's Love By Chance by way of those awesome spicy AePete scenes. And the WONDERFUL Lovely Writer offered meta commentary about the dependence that the Thai BL/Series Y industry has on heat in order to drive in fans, oftentimes to the detriment of more interesting and/or fulfilling and/or emotionally complicated plots.

KinnPorsche's lengthy marketing, from its Filmania days in 2020 and 2021, to its eventual 2022 premiere through Be On Cloud, certainly helped to drive interest and intrigue in the show, from the debut pairing of MileApo, to the clear use of heat that the show was promising before its airing. (Red Peafowl could never.)

Looking at the moment we are in right now -- early spring of 2024, with the ability to look back on the conclusions of both Only Friends and Playboyy -- I see the influence that KinnPorsche had on these shows being HUGELY marketed as cutting-edge-entrées to a high-heat and high-interest slice of Thai BL, particularly for Only Friends, which was GMMTV's own first step into really high-heat territory.

Both of the shows ended in meh territory (and both shows were written by the same writer in Den Panuwat, who may very well have a monogamy kink). Both shows ended up putting pure monogamy on a pedestal, and seemed to judge extra-monogamous sex as a "mistake" that was worth rectifying through "true," i.e., monogamous, love.

I posit, and I'm glad, that KinnPorsche did NOT go this route. Extracurricular sex wasn't even in the show's genes anyway, but -- the heat that KP marketed at the time of its premiere was solely associated with the centralized romances of the two main pairings. KinnPorsche didn't have to get extra-monogamously messy in its bones (huh huh) in order to be hot -- and it makes me curious to wonder why shows like Only Friends and Playboyy felt the need to promote relational messiness as a way to hype up their heat, all of which kinda putzed out in the end run of both of those shows.

Of course, we've still had heat in many other shows since KP's premiere, including in directions that roundly surprised the larger fandom, such as Pit Babe's take on omegaverse, and maybe even the vets Earth and Mix getting hot and heavy in Moonlight Chicken, a direction that Aof Noppharnach has been known to not take for the sake of keeping the ratings on his shows kid-friendly. But I do find it interesting that the heavy promotion of Only Friends and Playboyy led the fandom to think that these shows were going to have progressive takes on sex and sexuality, when they ultimately did not (I'd even argue that both of these shows ended up being judgemental of sexual experimentation). And while I don't think KinnPorsche's takes on heat were necessarily progressive, I do think the marketing of their actors getting into that, particularly as compared to Apo's previous career path in leaving acting for a while, was notable -- and as well, the care that the show took to depict heat scenes with excellent cinematography makes many of those scenes so memorable today.

I want to make one final note about KinnPorsche's and Be On Cloud's general influence on the Thai BL industry, in that I'm impressed by their investment in generally good-to-great writing and directing. As I overviewed yesterday, KinnPorsche heavily featured veterans from across the BL landscape, and Be On Cloud's latest serial offering, Dead Friend Forever, continued that trajectory, having an OG BL director in Ma-Deaw Chookiat partly take the helm of that show. Very importantly, Ma-Deaw Chookiat has been the screenwriter and director of a number of seminal Thai queer films and shows, including 2019's Dew, and more impactfully, 2007's The Love of Siam, which is considered a harbinger of the television Thai BL industry, and a film that has notably influenced important Thai BL creators, especially New Siwaj, who doesn't hesitate to include references to LoS in many of his shows, including Until We Meet Again, My Only 12%, and more. Chookiat has also screenwritten and/or directed three shows written by the notable Thai Y novelist, Sammon, in DFF, Manner of Death, and Triage. Sammon has been on a tear recently, as she will be the screenwriter for BOC's upcoming drama, 4 Minutes, as well as Spare Me Your Mercy, the hugely anticipated BL drama starring Tor Thanapob and singer Jaylerr.

Going back to my thoughts earlier about big marketing of big BLs: we've seen some duds recently from shows that were marketed at a big tip, from OF, to Playboyy, to Idol Factory's The Sign. From what I've gathered from the Tumblr tag regarding The Sign -- it seems that show suffered mostly from a lack of editorial context and plot sensibility and tightness, and that there could have been a good show, if the show had spent less money on CGI, and more money on the script.

Be On Cloud seems to mostly be putting its money where its pen is. I say "mostly" as a caveat. Was the ending of DFF fantastic? No, and I totally admit as much: while the show mostly stuck to its slasher genre conventions (thank you so much to @lurkingshan, my genre guru, for explaining this to me), the show seemed to poop out in the end by giving us a PheeJin BL ship, instead of Phee's and Jin's gruesome deaths. Womp womp. The pull of BL, and the need for clean-ish endings for the fujoshi crowd, may still be too economically enticing for studios, including Be On Cloud itself.

But I'm optimistic for BOC's upcoming shows, with the talent and money they're putting into scripts and directing. And we know that BOC's first film, the non-queer Man Suang, was an important artistic point for the studio as it continues its investment in MileApo and experimental content to market within and outside of Thailand. It was important enough that Dead Friend Forever, emanating from the Thai BL world, took on an entirely different genre instead, and literally presented that back to BL fans on a silver platter. I hope 4 Minutes can tread similar experimental territory. And I'm glad to see Be On Cloud being able to invest in high-quality writing and directing after the publicly major obstacles the studio experienced last year during the Build Jakapan scandal.

From the time I discovered Thai BLs in 2022, to now: I would not have expected KinnPorsche and Be On Cloud to start such a journey in my personal drama fan life. As well, considering how many damn shows I've now watched from Thailand, I also didn't expect this rewatch of KinnPorsche to be so much fun. AND, I truly didn't realize I had this much to say about it -- but there was a lot of say, especially by way of how referential the original KinnPorsche series was, which touched my little nerdy BL heart.

With that, I say ta-ta to my entrée to this fun world of Thai BLs, and move on to the next one!

[OKAY! We are kind of back of the grind, although my ability to watch dramas has really been hampered by real life obligations and schedules. BUT: I'm trucking along through War of Y, and I have some fun rewatches coming up in The Eclipse (my first-ever GMMTV BL), as well as two new-to-me dramas in GAP (the first GL on the list, WOO!) and My School President, which I can't wait for.

I've made a few tiddly adjustments to the list below, including adding Dead Friend Forever as an important addition, and I'm deep in my giggles with 23.5, which I am LOVING. ONWARDS! For more details about the ongoing list, please checkity-check here!

1) The Love of Siam (2007) (movie) (review here) 2) My Bromance (2014) (movie) (review here) 3) Love Sick and Love Sick 2 (2014 and 2015) (review here) 4) Gay OK Bangkok Season 1 (2016) (a non-BL queer series directed by Jojo Tichakorn and written by Aof Noppharnach) (review here) 5) Make It Right (2016) (review here) 6) SOTUS (2016-2017) (review here) 7) Gay OK Bangkok Season 2 (2017) (a non-BL queer series directed by Jojo Tichakorn and written by Aof Noppharnach) (review here) 8) Make It Right 2 (2017) (review here) 9) Together With Me (2017) (review here) 10) SOTUS S/Our Skyy x SOTUS (2017-2018) (review here) 11) Love By Chance (2018) (review here) 12) Kiss Me Again: PeteKao cuts (2018) (no review) 13) He’s Coming To Me (2019) (review here) 14) Dark Blue Kiss (2019) and Our Skyy x Kiss Me Again (2018) (review here) 15) TharnType (2019-2020) (review here) 16) Senior Secret Love: Puppy Honey (OffGun BL cuts) (2016 and 2017) (no review) 17) Theory of Love (2019) (review here) 18) 3 Will Be Free (2019) (a non-BL and an important harbinger of things to come in 2019 and beyond re: Jojo Tichakorn pushing queer content in non-BLs) (review here) 19) Dew the Movie (2019) (review here) 20) Until We Meet Again (2019-2020) (review here) (and notes on my UWMA rewatch here) 21) 2gether (2020) and Still 2gether (2020) (review here) 22) I Told Sunset About You (2020) (review here) 23) YYY (2020, out of chronological order) (review here) 24) Manner of Death (2020-2021) (review here) 25) A Tale of Thousand Stars (2021) (review here) 26) A Tale of Thousand Stars (2021) OGMMTVC Fastest Rewatch Known To Humankind For The Sake Of Rewatching Our Skyy 2 x BBS x ATOTS (re-review here) 27) Lovely Writer (2021) (review here) 28) Last Twilight in Phuket (2021) (the mini-special before IPYTM) (review here) 29) I Promised You the Moon (2021) (review here) 30) Not Me (2021-2022) (review here) 31) Bad Buddy (2021-2022) (thesis here) 32) 55:15 Never Too Late (2021-2022) (not a BL, but a GMMTV drama that features a macro BL storyline about shipper culture and the BL industry) (review here) 33) Bad Buddy (2021-2022) and Our Skyy 2 x BBS x ATOTS (2023) OGMMTVC Rewatch (Links to the BBS OGMMTVC Meta Series are here: preamble here, part 1, part 2, part 3a, part 3b, and part 4) 34) Secret Crush On You (2022) (review here) 35) KinnPorsche (2022) (tag here) 36) KinnPorsche (2022) OGMMTVC Fastest Rewatch Known To Humankind For the Sake of Re-Analyzing the KP Cultural Zeitgeist (part 1 here)

...interrupting the OGMMTVC list here to watch War of Y (2022) (watching) in chronology to decide if it gets listed...

37) The Eclipse (2022) (tag here) 38) The Eclipse OGMMTVC Rewatch to Reexamine “Genre BLs” and Internalized/Externalized Homophobia in GMMTV Shows 39) GAP (2022-2023) (Thailand’s first GL) 40) My School President (2022-2023) and Our Skyy 2 x My School President (2023) 41) Moonlight Chicken (2023) (tag here) 42) Bed Friend (2023) (tag here) 43 La Pluie (2023) (review coming) 44) Be My Favorite (2023) (tag here) (I’m including this for BMF’s sophisticated commentary on Krist’s career past as a BL icon) 45) Wedding Plan (2023) (Recommended as an important trajectory in the course of MAME’s work and influence from TharnType) 46) Only Friends (2023) (tag here) (not technically a BL, but it certainly became one in the end) 47) Last Twilight (2023-24) (tag here) (on the list as Thailand’s first major BL to center disability, successfully or otherwise) 48) Cherry Magic Thailand (2023-24) (tag here) (on the list as the first major Japanese-to-Thai drama adaptation, featuring the comeback of TayNew) 49) Ossan’s Love Returns (2024) (adding for the EarthMix cameo and the eventual Thai remake) 50) Dead Friend Forever (2024) (thoughts here) 51) 23.5 (2024)]

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theclairvoyage · 10 months ago

Text

Centrifugation: Chapter 1

plasmadonor!Joel x f!reader

You’re the star phlebotomist at the local plasma center, and the job has been increasingly mundane as of late… until a new and handsome Texan donor comes to the center and changes that, and the rest your life.

Series Masterlist

Series warnings:

AU, M/F, Age gap (20 years)-reader’s YOB is 1995 (purely coincidental lolol), eventual SMUT, blood, needles, & plasma talk (nothing too graphic, I promise!), a bit of blasphemy, criticism of religion, mentions of death, divorce, angst, fluffity fluff fluff, alcohol consumption, violence. Individual chapters will have specific warnings.

FYI – this work contains criticisms of religion and reader is atheist/agnostic. Feel free to scroll if this offends you. If you decide to read, remember that even if you are religious, this is not an attack on you, but rather ideology. And remember the tenets of religious freedom. Everyone has the right to believe – and NOT to believe – in the things you do.

Plasma Center UrbanDict:

Stick = venipuncture

PR = permanent rejection, aka permanent deferral

Reception = where donors have vitals taken to determine if they are suitable to donate

Donor Floor = where the magic happens, baby! Where donation occurs, aka sticks with big 17G needles

Processing = where units of plasma are sampled and frozen

This is my first ever fic! Excited to share all of it with you. I'm new to posting this kind of stuff on Tumblr, so please forgive rookie formatting and whatnot. Hope you enjoy! As of 03/10/24, I have 6 chapters written - I'm juggling my writing with finishing my MPH degree, so my schedule might be a little spotty until mid-May.

Chapter 1

Chapter warnings: blood, needles, & plasma talk, light violence.

WC: 3.7k

Friday, October 15th | 0755

You turn into the parking lot at the plasma center, a little later than your usual 10 minutes early. Your shift is at 8, so you don’t have much time to walk to the center, clock in, grab your coat and face shield and get to work. Thankfully, the parking lot is just across the street. As soon as you step out of your car, downtown Omaha greets you with the familiar scents of cigarette smoke and fall air, along with the sounds of the city buses and commuters chugging along.

It’s a nice morning. Living in Nebraska means you get to experience the peaks and valleys of all four seasons, and during fall, this means the leaves of what few trees are in the downtown area are painted lovely hues of orange, yellow, and even red – if you’re lucky enough to find a scarlet or pin oak tree.

The plasma center parking lot is shared with employees and donors, and it’s packed this morning. Not a great sign. You walk up to the back employee entrance and punch in the code. The keypad beeps and lights up green and you pull open the ages-old, heavy-as-hell door and make your way to the break room.

The donor waiting area is just outside the break room door, and you can tell by how full it is that it’s going to be a long day, confirming your earlier suspicions in the parking lot. Somebody definitely called in, you think. Great. Punching in the same code as before, you enter the break room, throw your stuff in your locker, and clock in.

As soon as you’re on the Donor Floor, donned with your white lab coat, blue nitrile gloves, and face shield, one of your best phlebotomists and good friend Keri approaches, looking flustered as hell.

“Jesus, thank fuck you’re here,” she sighs, taking a deep breath and raising her eyebrows at you. She smooths back her frizzy hair and sets down her face shield on the counter next to you.

“Are we short today, or did corporate send out some bonus texts to half of Omaha?” you say, checking the Donor Queue on the computer. 15 people waiting, average wait time of 43 minutes. Fucking clean up time, I guess.

“Two call-outs, but they’re newbies, so it wouldn’t have mattered, really,” she says. “Definite yes on the bonus texts. Regulars are all pissed off because they didn’t get any.” You roll your eyes and sigh. To get more donors in, the company you work for has been sending bonus texts to donors that haven’t been in in a while, which really ticks off the regular, twice-a-week donors. It’s all about meeting that liters budget.

“Where do you need me? Breaks need to be sent?” you ask her. You’re the lead phlebotomist, but you always check in with whoever opened before you make any decisions. Keri nods. “Send Blake to break, he’s got an open section now and we’ve got to get these wait times down.” You grab your mobile phlebotomy device and head that way.

Each phlebotomist can have a maximum of 6 donors in their section. You see Blake cleaning up the machine from his last disconnect, leaving you an empty section. “You can head to break, I’ll take over here,” you say, helping him wipe down the now-empty donor bed.

“Thanks… really happy that you’re here. It’s been a shit show today,” he says, walking away from the section toward the break room. You groan and head up to the front near the waiting area, grab a chart, and start climbing the mountain.

Thursday, October 15th | 1230

The morning turned out to be an absolute disaster. You quickly filled up your section once you sent Blake to break, apologizing to every donor you sat for the wait times. Most were understanding. There were a few that gave you an eye roll or a shrug. A few left the center, not wanting to be late for work. The fall is generally a busy time at the center, with people seeking extra money for football tailgates and games, college students needing extra money for just about everything, and parents stocking up early on holiday savings.

Thankfully, Keri, you, and the rest of the morning Donor Floor crew knocked the Queue down to 3 donors and wait times down to 10 minutes. Once the last morning break was done, they came over and sent you to your lunch. Delighted, you took off your sweaty coat and hung it up, washed your hands at the sink by the coat rack, and headed to the break room.

Before you’re able to punch in the door code, a deep, velvety voice stops you.

“Uh, miss? Can you point me in the right direction?”

You turn and look in the direction of the voice and see a taller man with dark, silvery-streaked curly hair, tanned skin and pensive brown eyes staring at you. He’s donning a red flannel that squeezes his broad shoulders and ropy arm muscles, and dark wash Levi’s that have the outline of his wallet imprinted in the front right pocket. He’s definitely a blue-collar guy, not unlike a lot of the current donors. Must be a new donor, you think. Damn, he looks good. You feel a little zap in your chest, not unlike the fingerstick donors get during screening.

“Hi! Are you a new donor?” You ask, turning on your customer service voice in hopes of calming your nerves. You step back from the door and walk toward him. He’s got a small white paper slip in hand, which tells you he needs his veins checked, so he must be new.

“Yes ma’am, need someone ‘ta look at my veins. Been here before, but it’s been a long time,” he says, watching you approach him and giving you the once-over. Twice-over. Your pulse quickens. His voice is like icing, dripping with a sweet Southern accent and mushing your insides. You smile and take the paper from him, hoping that you aren’t blushing.

“Roll up your sleeves for me and let’s take a look,” you say, watching him roll up the sleeves of his red flannel. He’s got thick, veiny forearms that are tanned and covered with freckles. He wears a watch on his left wrist that you assume hasn’t been removed in years, judging by the pure white skin peeking underneath. His hands are big and scarred. Definitely works with his hands, you think. He has a small, circle-shaped scar on his right arm near the venipuncture site, so he was telling the truth about donating plasma before. You grab a tourniquet hanging on the cabinet near the chart area, wrap it on his upper arm, and feel. His veins are huge and muscular, and you realize you didn’t need the tourniquet in the first place. Rookie mistake.

“Guess I really don’t need this,” you say, removing the tourniquet and feeling his ropy veins with your index finger. His skin is warm under your clammy finger. He chuckles. “Heard that one before,” he says. You laugh and make eye contact with him, noticing the crinkles at the corners of his eyes and his salt and pepper beard. His gaze is amiable and filled with something else you can’t quite pinpoint, and your stomach twists. You look away before you can decipher it.

“I don’t think you’ll have any issues with the stick,” you say, and he laughs. “Are you hydrated? Had a good meal in the last hour or two?” You ask, writing your name on the vein check slip and circling “Pass.” You see the name Joel Miller written at the top.

“Yes ma’am, I do a lot of workin’ outside and with my hands, so I know better,” he says, confirming your earlier assumption. His voice is sending a wave of tingles from your ears to your neck, and you feel goosebumps start to erupt in their pathway.

“Good man, Joel,” you say, noticing him perk up at you saying his name, “Take this back to the front desk and we’ll get you processed as quickly as we can.” He nods, gives you a handsome-as-fuck lopsided smile, and walks back to the front. You head back to the break room and turn to glance at him once more to find that he's already looking at you. Fuck, you think, looking back at the door. Don’t need a hot donor making me feel nervous like this. He’s older than you, but he might be the most handsome guy you’ve ever seen. You can only imagine how homely you look, clad in your scrubs and sweaty from the morning hustle and bustle.

You see every part of humanity at your job: young and old, foreign and domestic, all races and ethnicities, handsome and near homeless. There have been a few men that have caught your eye, and a few that you’ve met up with outside of the center, but none like this one. As tedious and mundane as the job can be, it’s the people that make it exciting, especially attractive ones. Well, hopefully he passes screening so I can see him on the Donor Floor, you think, contemplating what you’re going to get for lunch in the short time that you have.

Thursday, October 15th | 1430

Your break went by too fast. You decided on some fast-food place just across the street from the center. It’s good and cheap, but you know the greasy food is going to put you in a late-afternoon lull. Oh well. After you got back, the lobby was still relatively empty, so you started working on doing the monthly machine cleanings in the meantime.

The plasmapheresis machines are complicated and like everything else in the plasma center, they come with lots of rules and regulations. You’re a seasoned pro, though, so the cleaning and documentation are a breeze. You’re heading over to clean the last of the machines in the third row of the Donor Floor when you see a familiar, handsome head of dark salt-and-pepper curls walk behind Keri to one of the donor beds in the first row. He smiles at you as he lies on the donor bed, and you feel your cheeks heat and curl up into a smile of their own. Get a fucking grip. You’re relieved that Keri is taking care of him, because you’re nervous just seeing him in your work area. You can only imagine how shaky your hands would be with a needle if you were the one sticking him.

While cleaning the machines in the third row, you periodically look over at Joel and Keri. Keri is great with the donors, and it’s evident when you see Joel laughing with her. Each time you look up, he’s either already looking at you or looks up right after you do. You try to play it off like you’re scanning over all the donors, making sure everything is going as it should, but the sweat sheen forming on your face and neck betray you.

You see the light on his machine turn green, indicating he’s been stuck and is running smoothly. You imagine what it would’ve been like to feel his veins again, feeling his warm, tan skin underneath your fingers… and underneath other things, like—

“Oh my god, that man is such a charmer… and asked about you at least three times,” Keri states, snapping you out of your horny daydream. Your eyes widen and you turn so he can’t see your face from where he’s seated.

“Shhh! Keep your voice down!” You hiss, making both of you giggle. “What was he saying?”

“Oh, nothing much, just asking what the cute girl that checked his veins was doing all the way over here,” she smirks. “He used to donate here over 25 years ago when the center first opened up. Can you believe he’s that old? He does NOT look like it.” Odd, you think. He didn’t sound like he was from here when you spoke to him earlier. Wait, did he say I was cute? Blushing at his remark about your appearance, you remember the scar on his arm and think he’s probably telling the truth. “Wow, he looks good. How old is he?” Keri pulls him up on her mobile phlebotomy handheld and you see he was born in 1975. Damn. 20 years older than you.

Before you and Keri can gush further about Joel, the front door slams shut, echoing throughout the center and catching everyone off-guard. You watch as one of the younger regular donors, Cedric, storms past Reception and the donor waiting area over to the Donor Floor front desk, near where you checked Joel’s veins earlier. He practically spits your name, his brows pinched in a rage.

“Cedric, is everything alright?” You ask, approaching the front desk slowly. The once-noisy Donor Floor is quiet, save for the quiet whirring and clicking of the machines. Donors not wearing headphones are anxiously watching the front desk. You give Cedric the once-over and notice that his arm wrap is soaked with blood, and some of it has gotten on his white shirt and shorts and the floor around him. First rule of donating: Never wear white to a plasma center, dude.

“Does it fucking look alright? My arm wasn’t wrapped right and now I have blood everywhere!” he fumes. The entire Donor Floor is watching, including Joel and poor Blake, who must’ve disconnected Cedric. Blake approaches tentatively, tail between his legs, but you put your hand up to him, saying I’ll take care of this. Blake gives you a thankful nod and tiptoes back to his section.

“Cedric, I’m sorry about that. Come over to the sink and I’ll rewrap it for you,” you say, putting a fresh pair of gloves on. “Keri, can you clean up the blood spots with bleach, please?” You ask. She nods and grabs a Clorox bottle near the front desk, putting her face shield on and quickly walking around Cedric to search for the path of blood droplets. Cedric raises his voice again.

“Not good enough. I need that kid fired for his incompetence!” he points aggressively at Blake, flinging some blood droplets on the arm of your coat and on the front desk.

“Everybody makes mistakes, Cedric. Blake is a great employee. We can fix this. Let’s get you cleaned up, and maybe we can compensate you a little extra on your next donation,” you offer. But Cedric isn’t having it. He rips off the arm wrap and gauze and throws them at you while screaming expletives. The bloodied wrap nearly hits your face shield. Oh, hell no. He’s a long-term donor, so he’s probably clean, but it’s too close for comfort.

“Blake, call Trina and call the cops. Get this guy out of here. Cedric, don’t ever come back to this place,” you calmly instruct, walking backwards to find a biohazard container a safe distance from Cedric, never turning away from him. Trina, your manager, doesn’t put up with this kind of stuff and will make sure he’s permanently deferred.

“Fuck you, bitch!” Cedric yells, sprinting out of the center with two fingers on his free hand holding his venipuncture site, some blood dripping underneath. Once the front door slams shut, you turn around and take off all your PPE and toss it in the biohazard container, saving your nametag and pen. Frustrated and tired, you walk to the sink to wash your hands. Keri and Trina approach you.

“You alright, hon?” Trina asks. She’s a good manager, always looking out for her employees. She used to work on the Donor Floor, so she’s no stranger to these kinds of mishaps. Tensions can be hefty in this area – some donors are desperate for money, some fear needles more than death itself, and some are just grumps. Phlebotomists usually get the brunt of it.

“Yeah, I’m fine, just need to cool off. I told Blake to call the cops.” She nods.

“Go ahead. When the police get here, they’ll want your statement, so I’ll come find you then… I’ll put in the PR now,” she says, giving your arm a supportive squeeze before walking back toward the offices. You give her a pained smile and look to Keri, equally concerned as Trina. “Take your afternoon break, love. I’ll handle everything else,” she says. “Thanks, Ker. I’m gonna step in the freezer to cool off and then I’ll go.” She nods. You head toward Processing, located at the opposite end of the center. Processing has two giant walk-in freezers that always maintain temps of -40ºC – great for keeping fresh plasma frozen solid and an instant cool down.

You step in one of the freezers, shutting the heavy door behind you. You walk over to the fans and stand underneath. The sweat on your neck and back quickly freezes in its downward track, leaving behind a sting that could soon turn to frostbite. It doesn’t take long to cool off here, and anybody staying in for longer than a minute is supposed to put on a heavy coat, gloves, and a ski mask. It’s a popular spot for blistering summer days and after heated interactions like this. Satisfied with the pink blooming on your fingers and the crunch of your frozen, sweaty hair, you step out of the freezer and make your way outside for your break.

Once at the picnic table at the outdoor employee break area, you do a quick scan for Cedric. You can see the trails of blood drops leading to and from his car, and an empty space where his car must’ve been parked. Heaving a sigh of relief, you plop down at the table and massage your temples. Fuck… glad this day is almost over.

“Sweetheart, you alright?” A soothing, Southern voice rings in your ear and you look up, seeing Joel approach from his truck. He says your name, surprising you. Keri must’ve told him it while she was going through the process with him.

You take this moment to return the once-over he gave you earlier. Twice-over. His sleeves are still rolled up and you can see his arm wrap. His jeans crinkle at the hip with each step, his strong, toned quads flexing as each foot contacts the pavement. You can only imagine what he looks like from behind. His cowboy boots are worn, the leather cracking around the toes. He’s probably the type to wear a pair until they crumble to bits. He walks with a quiet bravado, taking long, smooth strides until he reaches you at the table.

You’ve no doubt you look exhausted. Though your sweat has frozen, you can feel how frizzy your hair is, especially around your face. Your eyes sting with fatigue and the skin underneath your eyelids tug downward. Your throat feels dry and tight, like you might cry soon. He must notice because the look in his eyes morphs from concern to anger.

“Hi, Joel,” you state, forcing a smile. “I’m okay. Not my first rodeo,” you wink, giving him a sarcastic “yee-haw” motion. He laughs, but his eyes betray him, still showing anger.

“Mind if I sit?” He motions to the spot across from you.

“No, go ahead, but the cops are on their way and who knows if Cedric will be back,” you caution him. He waves you off.

“That fuckin’ kid don’t scare me, and I saw everythin’ anyway. I can talk to the cops if you ain’t comfortable,” he says. He puts his hands on the backs of yours, and you feel another zap in your chest like you did when you first saw him earlier. You notice now that he doesn’t have a wedding ring.

“Thanks, but you don’t have to. I’m well versed in this department,” you say, feeling the tears reaching their boiling point. You do everything you can to keep them in, but one betrays you and falls down your cheek. Angry that you’re crying in front of Joel, you try to move your hand out from underneath his to wipe the tear, but he beats you to it.

“It’s okay, darlin’. You did the right thing, stickin’ up for your people,” he soothes, his thumb wiping your tear from your face. He moves his hand to cup your jaw and swipes his thumb gently over your cheek. His angry eyes softened back to concerned.

For what feels like an eternity, the two of you stare at each other, exchanging more communication nonverbally than words could ever. He’s looking at each of your eyes back and forth, and you feel yourself start to get embarrassed under his hot stare. You try to turn your head away from his gaze, but his hand stops you. “You’re alright, darlin’, got nothin’ to be ashamed of here,” he says, reading your mind. You bring your hand up from the table to gently grasp his arm as a sign of appreciation. His gaze follows and he swallows loudly.

“Thank you,” you say, giving him a genuine, close-lipped smile. His eyes move to your lips and then quickly dart back to your eyes, like you caught him doing something forbidden. He removes his hands and stands up, walking over to your side. He offers a hand to help you up and you accept, letting him pull you to your feet.

“Sorry your first visit back here was so crazy,” you say, and he laughs. “Hopefully next time it’s not so… exciting.” He moves his hand up to your shoulder and gives it a quick squeeze before dropping it. A tingle rips up your spine.

“Oh, I’m sure it will be.” He gives you that same look that he did earlier, the one where you couldn’t quite figure out what it meant. This time, though, you think you know exactly what it means. Your stomach somersaults.

“I’ll see you soon, darlin’. Hopefully your day gets better,” he says, turning to walk toward his truck. Once he gets to the driver’s side door, he turns to look at you again and pauses. You stand and stare at him, wanting to say something in return, but too overwhelmed by all your emotions. He smiles and gets in the truck, starting it and driving off while watching you with a small wave. You smile as he leaves.

Fuck.

Next Chapter

#joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller smut #joel miller #centrifugation #pedro pascal fandom

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modmamono · 1 year ago

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Getting people into Puyo Puyo. A lesson in etiquette.

[Edit: The video adaptation with updated script:

youtube

]

(Some tips on how to get people into Puyo Puyo and where to get them to start.)

Introduction.

First and foremost. My Tumblr post here is (perhaps counter-productively) for people who may want to get their friends and newbies into Puyo Puyo and not for said friends and newbies themselves. (Though you’ll no doubt get something out of this too.)

I just wanna instill some etiquette into people. Because way too often in Discord servers I see a group of people shout at a newbie to play their favorite Puyo Puyo game instead of trying to actually considering what the best Puyo game to get started with is for that newbie.

My goal is to try and help you get people into this series you like.

This is by no means a guaranteed method and should not be seen as such.

What’s Puyo Puyo’s appeal?

Generally speaking these are the one people cite when I ask them:

The characters.

The Artstyle.

Stories/Lore.

A puzzle game with personality. Similar to those of fighting games.

It's funny and charming.

Simple-to-learn, hard-to-master gameplay.

Keep these in mind.

Do you know the person?

This is very important.

- If it’s a friend that shows interest in the colorful cast and the wacky words they shout as the jellies disappear on screen in a pleasing rhythm, then don’t be shy encouraging them to try a Puyo Puyo game out.

Not all friends have everything in common. But if you’re friends and know enough about each other, that alone should do a lot of heavy lifting.

- If it’s a stranger or someone online you barely know then its best to play it safe.

You can ask a few questions what they look for in a game and maybe consult the bottom of this blogpost what game to recommend to them.

- A tip for both: If they show no interest, then just accept it might not be their thing. It’s disheartening, not getting someone into the thing you love, but that’s just life sometimes. Doesn’t mean you have failed, it just means you’ve been pitching to the wrong people.

Dos & Don’ts.

- This is a series where you come for the story/gameplay and stay for the gameplay/story.

You can sell the game on both as well. But if the person is inclined toward one over the other then sell them on story, gameplay, or even the aestatics or the characters and chances are they’ll grow attached to all the other things. No need to rush things.

- Reign in your passion a little.

I’m not saying to not be passionate. But it’s possible you can turn people off to Puyo Puyo because you never shut up about it and keep trying to sell it to them.

This goes for anything really. Sometimes people just get sick of hearing a thing, and instead of checking it out, they’ll disassociate and distance themselves from it.

- Don’t oversell how tough the gameplay is.

Unless the newbie like to be challenged don’t tell them Puyo is hard. That can be discouraging.

You won’t believe how many people I see trying to get someone into Puyo Puyo and do this. You want them to get them into this series, right?

Most Puyo Puyo games have difficulty settings in the options menu anyway. Tell them there’s no shame to adjust it to their liking and switch it to another setting when ready.

- Be supportive and encouraging.

If they struggle with the game. Be kind and offer them some advice. Teach them some basic stuff to get through if needed.

Beating WakuWaku is already a huge accomplishment, don’t make that victory invalidated by saying it doesn’t count because they didn’t do HaraHara if you know what I mean.

There’s no shame in lowering the difficulty. They’ll get better eventually.

- Don’t force them advanced tactics right away or funnel them into competitive.

Let. Them. Have. Fun. First.

Don’t breathe down a newbie’s neck for not using GTR or whatever else stacking method. Let them learn and experience the game however they want to. And if they wanna ask for help, then provide that. Try not to preemptively answer EVERYTHING if they didn’t even ask in the first place.

When they’re ready for GTR, competitive, and the like, then they are ready. But they gotta make that call on their own.

- When you play multi-player with your newbie friend(s) try not to do this:

youtube

You wanna invite them into the series, right? Why turn them off like that? You don’t wanna chance and encourage them to try again. Losing to a player is way more demoralizing then losing to the game’s AI will ever be, they’re just two different things.

But if you do play with your less experienced friends the games have handicaps. If you’re good at the game put your board on Spicy, and let your friend choose whatever they want.

- Soooo, uh, about the lore...

Generally speaking, don’t entice a newbie in with that unless they’re a lore nut (and even then I have my reservations).

I know most Puyo fans love that Puyo Puyo has lore and that’s a big appeal to the series, but hear me out:

I think that’s a terrible way to entice a newbie. It’s fun lore for sure, and ideally, they get into it eventually. But have you ever thought about how much lore there actually is per game?

Puyo 1, Tsu, and Sun don’t have much of anything.

Puyo~n has Doppel and her intrigue and amazing vibe. But when you peel off the layer there is nothing but fanon.

Box and Minna have nothing much of note.

Fever 1 is a new world but otherwise is just another Puyo 1, Tsu, and Sun.

Fever 2 and 15th Anni are actually the exception to the rule. And I will go into why later.

And the rest while they do provide lore. It’s all contained within a single game for the most part.

Most of the interesting stuff are from Novels, Drama CDs, old dungeon crawling games. Which is cool and all. But, for now, you’re only just pitching the game(s) to the newbie. That’s quite a bit away.

I just don’t think it’s wise to hype up the lore when they’re barely ever gonna see any of it. I’ve been around too. A lot of the lore goes over a lot of people’s heads.

That and I think it’s just more rewarding to let newbies piece things together themselves. It releases a really nice feeling in the brain that SEGA’s run actually has a solid continuity.

I hope I’ve made my case? This is probably my most controversial stance here. But I think it’s for the best. Puyo Puyo is a series with lore, but it’s not a lore focused series. (I feel the same about Kirby.)

Entice newbies with surface level things first. Like the funny characters or the surface level stories. They’ll get to the deeper stuff eventually when they’re hooked. Trust me.

Unless you know they’re the type of person that likes lore for lore’s sake. But in that case do please let them know most games aren’t upfront about it and they have to put in the effort to dig. And digging for the obscure can be fun.

- Don’t push your favorite Puyo Puyo games onto a newbie without a good reason.

Sometimes your favorite game isn’t the best to start with. And while I believe you could give a newbie any game and if it clicks BOOM they’re a Puyo fan now. I do believe some games are better introductions to get someone into the games.

I’ll get into what I believe are the best options later on in this post.

- Don’t overload them on things to keep in mind.

Give them no more then 2 things to keep in mind. Things like “PPT1 will have a nasty difficulty spike, so be careful” and “I wonder what your thoughts are on a certain moment”.

If you give someone too many things to keep in mind they might get distracted from the game to remember everything you’ve told them.

And I believe that covers it all.

Which games should you recommend to newbies?

I’ll give you a bunch of options. But I’ll let you know which ones I think are the best for a newbie along with my reasoning.

Best:

Puyo Puyo Tetris 1 & 2

No contest. These are just the best ones to start off with. Either one of these will do.

You may disagree for whatever reason, but the fact it’s a crossover with Tetris is its biggest point in its favor. If they don’t like Puyo Puyo they will have Tetris as a safety net. By default that’s the best.

That and it’s been proven that it has been a surprisingly good entry. Over half of the current fanbase started of with PPT1. Like that guy who makes those Puyo Puyo in a Nutshell videos. You know, that guy.

Also you can buy PPT2 on all current consoles, most other games are only accessible through emulation if you want them in English. That’s important because some people are just against emulation or just plain don’t know how to emulate things.

And if they like either of these games maybe they’re willing to try emulation to play more Puyo Puyo.

Also who knows, if they use the Tetris as a safety net maybe they’ll bounce back and later enjoy Puyo Puyo after all.

Good options:

Puyo Puyo Tsu/Puyo Puyo 2 (Most versions)

Puyo Puyo Tsu introduced the standard ruleset most other rules are based off. And that’s the ONLY rule it has. Which I think works to its benefit for a newbie.

While the game lacks much in the way character interactions (maybe recommend them the Super Famicom translation patch which does have those) it does have a goal reaching the top of the tower and beating Satan.

I think the tower is an excellent motivator to get good at the game. If they can beat Satan at the top I’d say they’re ready for any Puyo Puyo game to come.

My preferred version is the Super Famicom version called “Super Puyo Puyo Tsu” but I don’t think you can’t really go wrong with any version besides the Neo Geo Pocket Color one.

For the emulator averse they can buy the game on SEGA 3D Classics Collection on 3DS or the SEGA AGES version on Nintendo Switch.

Super Puyo Puyo Tsu is also available on Nintendo Switch Online’s SNES app. So if you have the basic package, you already have that game at your disposal.

All versions except the NGPC one are in Japanese, but I don’t think that’s much of a hindrance with this game specifically. Any version without the cutscenes is sorta alingual. Sure there’s Japanese text in the game, but of all the games, I think you can enjoy this one the most without having to understand it.

Puyo Puyo!! 20th Anniversary (DS) (Precise Museum patch)

(Note, a Wii patch with a revised script is on its way.)

I think this game is a good introduction to the current day cast and has a ton of modes. So if basic rules don’t do it a newbie may find a mode that slowly eases them into more basic rules.

If you wanna 100% the game you gotta win 200 story mode matches. That’s a lot of Puyo, and that’s plenty of time to learn.

Do refrain from telling newbies that though. 200 is big number. Playing 200 without realizing it is more palatable then telling them you have to do 200 to beat the game. One’s fun, the other sounds like a chore.

Direct their focus on the cast, there’s a lot to chew on this game.

I would recommend, but...:

Puyo Puyo Fever 2 & Puyo Puyo! 15th Anniversary

These are the actual lore games. These games practically give you lore as a reward at every turn. These two games are the exceptions to my rule that you shouldn’t sell the games with lore to a newbie. And soaking all that lore in is a great motivator to play these games.

But we have no patches yet beside some out-of-date ones from Puyo Nexus. Which is the main problem (for Fever 2 especially).

Also, while these two games are a bit holy grail, their praises are rightfully sung. I’m a bit apprehensive calling them great entry points.

Fever 2 relies on the Fever rule. Which not everyone’s a fan of. I’ve been around and not everyone enjoys that rule (and anecdotally it overstimulates me). The Fever Rule has a ton of rules to it. But a lot of people were introduced to Fever 1 and became life-long fans so I don’t know, take my claim with a grain of salt. I’ve been told it’s an easier game then Fever 1 at least. Fever 1 does not play nice.

And 15th’s story mode relies on a roulette. Which doesn’t have to be a negative, but it is a game with a with a ton of gimmick rules. And while 20th is that too it gives you more freedom in that regard, which I think might be more beneficial to a newbie.

But any of the games above here are good places to start. One dishonorable mention to recommend to a newbie:

Puyo Puyo Champions

I’ve historically been nice to this game. But I don’t recommend it to a newbie.

It’s just Puyo 2 and Fever Rules at an admittingly cheap price. Not much to it.

You could argue that I gave Puyo Puyo Tsu slack in that regard. But my counter argument would always be: “What is the goal of Champions?”

This game is so competitive focused it hurts. No charming animations, the characters count instead of escalating their spells. Only good single-player content is hidden behind too many boring tutorials, which is watered down from the Nazo Puyo games.

Puyo Puyo Tsu you scale a tower and get an ending. Reaching the top and beating Satan is the goal.

Champions has nothing to offer besides online rankings. And as I’ve said before, don’t funnel a newbie into being competitive. They’ll do it when they’re ready. Let them enjoy the jelly game on their own pace first. Let them enjoy the characters.

And that’s all I wanted to say.

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