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only-lonely-lovers · 10 months ago

Text

09.21.2022

tags: repression/denial, dubcon, blowjobs

notes: This one really digs into how difficult & dodgy I imagine it can be to touch Hanako. Also alludes to the 'sake RP' later on.

Bird is あ / Avvy is つ

あ：Err, before bed/upon waking I actually really had a whole like oveur in my head, reflecting on 3way stuff very early on vs. later… This might sound disordered but let me do my best to collect everything.

It's always fascinating when I feel rebooted back into a certain kind of apprehension/fear of permitting Avvy to touch me. Despite everything you know. I think it's not uncommon after feeling so "in control" and proud of myself like heh yesss did so good at eating and fucking pussy… I can feel my little Amane brain become reluctant to transition into the brain that happens when dick gets touched. Like er… waito. [mouth tense]

Makes me really contemplate. There's this gap moe Amane has, despite being a sicko freak pervert, where he is so overwhelmed by the intensity of his own feelings, which is what leads to your tubro virgin repressed guy, who has a vacant stare and can barely talk while he is inundated with emotions. Face flushed, helplessly staring agog and all, that guy. When he's not in that mindset, I think he dreads it and fears it, he's not seeking to feel like his whole head is filled with hot fog and he is paralyzed. Don't want it. Also why he's like [snaps out of it] wourarhghh -- like often enough. Ah oh christ. [flees]

When you're a repressed guy, I swear the journey with having a cock is first it must make you feel very, very weak. Since you're not actually so familiar with handling it while it's, you know. Hard. Leaking. Wanting. Watching porn and thinking of the 500 things you would do to Yashiro can be cool, like, you can feel so aggrandized and powerful in your head, and telling yourself all the crazy things you'd say.. but, like, I think in practice, twitching and huffing and whining when brushed up against feels so feeble. It doesn't feel, hot and cool and sexy. And I think of Amane as being able to premeditate as much, and avoidant of bringing it out even, earlier on. I really do like to think of "hard mode" starts to runs, where you can't even brush your hands against his belt without him pulling his hips away and redirecting. Sex is ONLY under the context of doing things to Yashiro him self, and Tsukasa is extremely limited and allowed only to hold her in place or stoke things via dialogue… if Amane is benevolent, that day.

But ah, you know, I was thinking specifically about Nene's brand of thirstiness, and I realize I really want something like this to wear away at her brain. She has to deal with being so… in anticipation… for cock, specifically, that she feels a little cucked to not even get to look at it… Nene is not like Tsukasa, she can feel impatience and pointed desire. She has to confront that she has been waiting for so long to touch a guy herself. Want it. Need it! … like ah, at first, it's easy to be overwhelmed that Hanako-kun is touching her at all, and I think her goodgirl bones & desire to be convenient tell her to appreciate it. It's lucky he is even touching her [gets reduced] … for a while, this is the case, and well, like. I mean it feels good, it does. But eventually just starting to feel like mrrhghh… but… It's like a hot beacon in the corner of her eye sometimes.. Tented black fabric of slacks… Not fair…

Just thinking about a girl really having to baste in cockthirst, and have an impulse to just cup hand over it one day, and feeling it tense & jump under her hand. Feel dizzy from that -- but Hanako grabs her wrist like he is fighting for his life suddenly, and I think Nene feels like. About to cry. Like, ah I know I know, it's not… allowed. hghhrg…. [internally, boiling] BUT WHY… BUT- BUT YOU'RE A PERVERT.. BUT AREN'T YOU… BUT DON'T YOU WANT TO… YOU DON'T WANT ME TO ?? TOUCH IT ?????? … like starting to get, like 😭 what is the POINT OF A BOYFRIEND!!!!!! KSDJGFK

つ：in early situations I imagine Nene unfortunately has a simple "he's…. generous…" sort of feeling about how servicing Hanako is, feeling spoiled, lavishing under the obsessive and pornographic attention-- Hanako can even feel 'indulgent' and 'needy' in his own way while touching her, so it -feels- at first like a kind of shared vulnerability in some sense. but over time you have to realize he's holding something else back and it's not exactly a matter of 'most generous lover in the world needs not you to touch him' but that he's just, ah, protecting himself.

and he's just doing the physical equivalent of not talking about his feelings. it takes a long time to process that though. for a long time i think it's just a weird feeling in the back of her head.

I'm sure Hanako even benefits at times from FRAMING it with a word or two as if it's generosity, like, don't worry, no need, it's about you, shhh….

it works for a while, but he'll shatter the illusion some day with flinching too protectively and he won't be able to play it off enough for her to forget about it

あ：On paper, it can just feel like she's allowed to be a pillow queen, and um, girls… girls would like, love to be in her position, right-? it's… it's lucky… she's lucky. Ah, poor Nene, she's going to have to cross that bizarre threshold of being confused about wanting more, she's so used to the mindset of "if i could have anything-!!" … it almost feels like, illogical to question the circumstance

It's tricky you know. especially when it DOES feel good… you both are attracted to one another and enjoying what is happening-?

You'd be stupid to say Hanako doesn't love to lick your pussy. right ._.

つ：if only Tsukasa could be a bro and make a point to her by reaching HIS hand towards it for one second and Amane would so violently lurch to stop him without any of the pretenses he offers yashiro and look terrified and then have no recourse for explaining that

あ：... but this is why Tsukasa is vital backup

つ：would just throw tsukasa's hand away and huff and angrily get back to sex

あ：Protective and defensive, like he be! Tsukasa in the room is just like a dousing rod feeling the cumulative energy of Nene's yearning and Amane's avoidance and apprehension Everyone's psychic waves are hitting him

つ：the desires in this room! foo-wee

あ：[fans self]

Amane grasps Tsukasa's wrist like he is for real stopping a wild bear You really need Tsukasa in the room to help contextualize things….

つ：Tsukasa gently says gomen ne. and recedes his hand gently and moves back to holding yashiro in place for him. squeezes yashiro's middle as a communication to her like mm.. you see that?

あ：Something's going on here… Girlie to girlie communication

Something to maybe confer with Tsukasa later on her own… Like. Ah Tsukasa is just a safe place to field the raw insecurity and doubt, of like, it's not that he doesn't want to right…?

つ：oh! he wants to

あ：How validating but frustrating to hear. like well… YEAH….!!! BUT……… OOGH.. Wants to.. but won't let us…

つ：its also peeling for nene at least. its why its doubly hard to deal with. its hard to be honest about. wanting cock. want to see it smell it touch it taste it. mmmmm takes a long time to be able to talk about that even to tsukasa

あ：This is the part where there is no honor

つ：YOU can try to frame it protectively as like.. you feel bad/selfish only receiving attention, its only right to give it.. but tsukasa will tilt his head and smile at you and you knooow its not gonna work on him

and be like . chigau… thats not. right. i know.. its not. thats-- its like what he's doing , isn't it trying to say something another way…. to get away with it….

あ：^^ ………… nene-chan is smart to see how it's the same

つ：she's been around this world of hanako's, too much

あ：God one always feels bad for Nene, it feels like the journey intrinsically requires her to feel mindbroken and end up crying a lil fkdsgjhdghhg like tsukasa-kun [wails] I WANT IT

つ：ah but the convo is gonna reach the funniest moment, nene will be like this when she realizes wait. does tsukasa also want to suck off hanako

あ：A girl needs someone to pet her hair while this kinda stuff happens

what the. wait a minute

つ：hes going to be petting her and being so like amane is stubborn~ and he's not thinking about it either. theres gonna be a nice moment at least where nene is like…………….

tsukasa-kun………………………… would you like to..do that sort of thing… to Hanako-kun.. too?

and he's going to be staring blankly like he hasn't earnestly thought about it looks around

あ：the moe

つ：nene like…………… [it feels like he's processing something new, actually]………. [tsukasa-kun………….] but it helps her feel like slightly less of 'the child in the room'

あ：>Wants to.. but won't let us…

i actually thought it'd be cute if nene worded it like, "he wont let us…" due to tsukasa getting his hand smacked from touching him earlier, but that tsukasa just regards this wordlessly, internally like ?? us-? :)? hm well anyways

In his mind he was just showing you something. but not like. but he was never gonna, like… you know.

emptyheaded lil guy staring blankly like he has learned new colors existed

I feel like spiritually Tsukasa is always easily brought back to the "amane would be happier without me" mindset of little red house boy. like ah well it would be nice but he doesnt want that from me, this is about nene

つ：its like. i need to be a big girl…. Tsukasa-kun is disadvantaged, too….. I already felt unease about how he's more of a support character (in RPG terms….)… but I assumed at least kindof that it was OK, he doesn't seem like he wants anything….

nene needs tobe brave and be like

m . don't you. uhhm. [gets quiet] tsukasa-kun. uhm. don't you want to know. what it . . t. [SQUEEZES EYES SHUT] tastes like. he's like wow. blink! wow

あ：[brain buzzes] taste…

つ：looks down though but is just like hehe… ah. amane wouldn't want me to….. [twiddles fingers] nene angrily: TO HELL WITH ''AMANE''

あ：whoa-!

つ：HE'S ALWAYS DOING WHATEVER HE WANTS TO US, WITH US-- ! BUT-- BUT WHAT ABOUT WHAT WE WANT !? MAYBE-- EVEN IF HE DIDN'T LIKE IT-- HE COULD JUST SIT AND TAKE IT FOR A MINUTE! FOR OUR SAKES…..!!!

CLASPS TSUKASA'S HANDS WE NEED TO WORK TOGETHER! WE NEED TO STOP LETTING HANAKO-KUN CONTROL THE PACE!!!

if he doesn't like it, he can be abig boy and TELL US! he can't be-- shoving our hands away, like a, picky, toddler!!! its not fair!!!

あ：In moments like these I imagine it's such a 50/50 split of Tsukasa being like wow nene-chan is so impassioned wow… [feeling her desires, feeling how they would be fun] but like intermediately she says words that kinda are like butter and distract him in the middle of it like . amane control . picky toddler. these things make me🤤

つ：awe but i like that💔

あ：like you ARE trying to give a rallying speech to a slave [finger in mouth] duhhh i dunno…

つ：takes a moment. breathes mmmmm. …………….. I think this has to be up to Nene-chan…..❤️

あ：i think tsukasa has enough wisdom stat though to be like. [through the haze] but amane IS bound to simply deny himself what he really wants if we do EVvverything his way. i will support you👍 like well it wouldnt like mess him up forever to get kinda molested by nene :3

つ：he's able to think 'its not fair' but only in the framing 'for amane to not let himself have what he wants'

if Nene-chan wants to be more forceful………….. [breathing very close to her] I will support Nene-chan, when the time comes. she shivers. like ah wait gmhnr what are we

あ：a moment of what are we. as is necessary, in these times

つ：she's hypnotized a lil though. its like o. okay……

i think that when the time comes it willl be more comedic than anything at first. for a second it will be like. nene will not be able to do it gracefully. it will be like. nnn… [quietly] nnn.. hanako: mmm~ whats that… Yashiro…. [purring] a request….? NNN… NOW, TSUKASA-KUN its like suddenly flung to the floor w tsukasa's chimp strength

あ：it's like FJKSDHGF??!/ she like. she straddles you like a madwoman

つ：panting. TSUKASA-KUN AND I…. WANT TO DO SOMETHING, HANAKO-KUN! hanako looking at tsukasa like betrayed WHAT'S SHE TALKING ABOUT????

あ：imagine tsukasa just looking down like [eyes squinted] like teehee

つ：he has god's power so you know. i think it really can be like holds you down w one arm behind ur back. reaches forward to unbuckle belt for nene

あ：The wildcard stat is always that tsukasa is more crazy externally OP

つ：the 1 moment hanako is like why do i have a seal on me i need to not. i gotta not

あ：yes

つ：gomen-ne, Amane…. [darkly, in ear] I promised nene-chan I'd help her, with what she wants….. she really, really wants something. [smiles up at her pleasantly]❤️

あ：Why don't we watch and see what she'll do-?

つ：nene insane mode. grabbing both her hands around the tent like she's possessed eyes spiraling

あ：thinking about your girl's crazy jerkoff strength hands what a . like YELPS

つ：stares at it just tented and squeezing it in hands like its really here right here… i can do . it he'll likeit though he's a BOY!!! he has to [angrily] he has to like it of course he will!!!!

あ：OF COURSE HE'LL LIKE IT!!1

つ：THATS THE PROBLEM if anything it has to be

unbuttoning. unzipping. tsukasa hearing the noises experiences an odd… nostalgia. its been a while, really… since hearing amane dress down…. it's naturally something that evokes the past-- just changing in the same room together….

あ：It's actually probably immediately, somewhat satisfying that Hanako was like, in the middle of saying something in rebuttal, in an annoyed/frustrated tone, only to cut off into a choked, higher sound as she grabs at it. like already, that's… new. hyeah

Indeed though… it's been so long. Tsukasa would even specifically be familiar with this uniform being taken off. like… same as it ever was

As panic sets in, I think Hanako starts to sound more overtly distressed, like. The reality of how no one is backing out, is hitting him. Thought you could clip Tsukasa to let go, thought Nene could feel guilty and embarrassed. But feeling the material all shuff and move away, she's over there panting above it like a maniac. alarming!!

Devolve into being like , "Y. Yashiro." swallows. "Come on, I said it wasn't necessary. What's with you.." dodgy hips pulling away, trying to lift a leg up to tuck in and cover self Jostles her

but you know, uncontrollably tries to be mean, like. "What, you're telling me YOU'RE the type to not listen when someone says 'no'?" the crazy noncon murdered his brother guy in here saying this

つ：Tsukasa, to Nene-chan: ah, he's being mean [not talking to Amane directly] Nene: h. he is. its like EH???

あ：like wtf i'm right here [gets objectified for 1 second] wtf treating me like i'm not a person

つ：Hanako-kun….. I. Want to. [closes eyes] I want to. To do it. Really badly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! I'M TIRED OF BEING HELD AT BAY! Its. its selfish. I know! it is! BUT I THINK I CAN BE SELFISH ONCE!!!! I won't do it again, if you hate it so much!

あ：spiritually tsuaksa seal clapping over amane getting called selfish i think its always like AHUHA yeah

つ：I'll-- [kindof… getting dizzy thinking this, and also knowing it will effect hanako who is possessive] I'll never get to do it… if you don't let me. If you won't let something happen… then…. isn't it my only chance to feel. something

Tsukasa being a wild card: or maybe she'd do it to me [EVERYONE SPITTAKES AND TURNS TO TSUKASA] I have one too, after all Nene-chan likes that part of the body. [being a simple kid] Amane would rather it be himself, right?

あ：at first mutually becoming dizzy. feels like a weight is dropped on his chest. NOT ready to hear Yashiro be so overtly desperate and also talk about this… but omg LOOKS UP AT TSUKASA

つ：Nene-chan's first taste. [nene: he said taste… no, tsukasa, please… i'm trying to not talk about the blowjob]

あ：WHAT IS THIS,A THREAT

つ：it's made her really crazy. This is already really out of character for Nene-chan! the word taste can hit hanako's brain at a delay

あ：He's got such whiplash at everything he's not really like. processing what the full implications are

going from like ohh she wants my cock.t o like wtf WHAT ARE YOU IMPLYING??/

つ：[nene, shaking, trying not to turn to dust] [understanding undermining hanako's possessiveness is a good tactic but is dying] r. right.

m . maybe I would. do anything. [weird moment with tsukasa, it's funny] rly funny but like Hanako is the: DON'T just jerk eachother off

あ：You're stoking the Hanako that is like. URGHHFHG MY WHORE GIRLFRIEND THINKIGN ABOUT OTHER GUYS

oh so you're just going to grab my little brother's cock if i don't put out. WHAT KIDN OF WORLD!! you're gonna hear his shoes scraping the ground from kicking angry horse

つ：gets it out into the open air. Tsukasa again is like… natsukashii I do remember that thang distantly…

あ：like a dream a dream i once knew

つ：[hanako hearing tsukasa and nene inhale]

あ：it's good actually if hanako is trapped in the whacky shack really. becomes completely stiff

"Alright… alright alright alright, okay, fine, can we just. Get it over with." "If you need it so badly."

つ：nene gets electrocuted to hear this its like. green means go swallows it

あ：oh once again like You really- [CHOKES] .. i think its really like, KNOCKS HEAD BACK INTO TSUKASA

つ：oofs

あ：immediately panicked breathing. like he's hyperventilating. trying to kick and pull away. despite what he said… it's like, the sheer panic to the intensity, means he really twists and pulls out of her mouth

つ：popppp scrabbles and grabs with hand

for Nene…. ah its all become raw impulse gklfgj no more thoughts HAD IT IN MOUTH WANT IT IN MOUTH!!!!!! FEELING REFRESHINGLY LIKE--SEXUAL!!! hot. cccock. sexy. in

Tsukasa's eyebrows are a little floating off of his head, not quickly but slowly

あ：Hanako is not really to feel… genuinely assaulted… It's rawwww such raw sensations. it makes being touched through pants feel like it was paltry little flirting grazes…

つ：tsukasa reaches forward, and presses a hand down into Amane's pelvis area, to try to anchor him down, palm splayed…

nice webbing of thumb and pointer framing base of cock, more or less, though he's leaving plenty of room for nene, they barely graze one another.

あ：Necessary, otherwise he'd really be twisting and pulling back a lot

つ：Nene's little brain becomes only the goal of making Hanako come. getting to the. finish line. I WANT

あ：we got this far

つ：I like the idea of Hanako starting to plead tsukasa and manipulate to tsukasa's slave brain nature lol…. like, Tsukasa-- TsuSkaasa yy, you-- listenn--! you listen to me--!!! HISSINGGG

あ：Underhanded… but I think Amane is also just, like sincerely feeling like, THIS ISN'T FAIR… i tell tsukasa what to do…

つ：you do what I say, you're….. [can't bring self to say 'you are mine' though…] [which is a weakness, maybe if you could say it so directly he'd give in]

あ：[huffing air through teeth, ungracefully] You know.. you know-!! how it works [cough] mm but you like this all happening while the blowjob is starting to really deteriorate faculties. slurs. blinks out of sync

つ：his last ditch effort really trying to use your big brother voice on tsukasa… sound angry with him

tsukasa leans down…. again says sorry…. but… …. [whispering just to him] I can tell….you like it. aren't you glad it's happening, Amane….

releases some of the pressure on pelvis… moves hand towards Nene, gently strokes her cheek with his thumb, stokes her to open her pleading little eyes wet and determined… so admirable

あ：I think you finally get Amane to just have brows pinched, looking miserable… in that way that's clear he does like it and knows he does. staring up at tsukasa and then eyes shifting down to where yashiro is, naturally drawn by the movement of tsukasa's hand. feel struck at the sight of her… Ugh

to not be able to see your own cock because it is enveloped in a mouth… instead, looking down at her face nestled flush against… huuurts. can't squeeze eyes shut fast enough, to hide them rolling back into skull

rambling in his mind like stupid sexy… stupid…. what kind of girl does this… force a blowjob-?? insane. since when. can't be happy just getting fingered-? need to suck my cock. need it so bad you do THOS?? crazy fjsdjghdfj whore lskfdghfj d what kind of girl… have to smell it-? need "a taste"… GGGODD

つ：letting the fetish truly sink in. SHE JUST WANTED IT SO BADLY!!! becomes violently narcissistic

あ：finally… roll hips a lil the freed up room from tsukasa moving his hand…

つ：Tsukasa nuzzles Nene is like TT____TT he moved…… into it…… [angelic choir] [starts tearing up] finally thinking: I don't want to do it only once…. TT___TT

あ：feel awareness of self occupying her mouth… ugh…

つ：I want to do it over and. overrrrr every day after class… please wish he could become addicted to it--!!!!

maybe he was holding back cuz it'll drive him crazy [getting fetishistic] [whore brain]

あ：Wish it could feel so good… that he wouldn't… that he COUDLN'T give it up…

once again tsukasa feeling the psychic waves coming off of you two I think you could break hanako though once we're this far. once he's starting to sink into the divine ego of it all.

つ：tsukasa pets nene…..

あ：want to reach down to rest a hand on her head finally, too

つ：hanako wiggling but, differently wanting to free a hand… tsukasa would be like … ! hmmm… allows…..

あ：It's like sigh… i may not have liked how we got here. but. it's a blowjob. Not trying to make Yashiro feel rejected here it's already happening so i might as well get to feel the motion thread through her hair…

つ：Tsukasa will settle into just arms around shoulders and nuzzling amane enjoying the vibes.. mmm I did good Amane is having fun❤️

あ：Nonconsensually has become a king resting in his throne what can be said. all makes your dick feel good.

つ：finally sit up at length…..

あ：Uehh but you want moments like this to be like… sex is special, it really makes you capitulate to your desires more urgently and wholly than you normally would. it's like rhghh well. well. WELL!

つ：if you want it so badly……

i like sitting up 'cuz it makes him loom over her, finally taking control back in the situation tsukasa hanging off of you, not over you… nene under you, not over you.

あ：readjusting… take a deep breath. exhale

つ：poor desperate girl….. mmm. have to pity her….

あ：I like to think it fluidly shifts into grasping her jaw and like.. adjusting the pace, directing her to slow for a second… but it's not like it's stopping, just taking the reins. moving in and out of her mouth willfully Pity indeed… like it finally loads in

つ：poor nene is clearly so relieved to see hanako becoming agreeable…. its like ahh.. she didn't want to force it, now did she…. she does want to be good…. she just got so desperate

あ：Such a needy little thing. sigh…

つ：and so agreeable to just once….. maybe a fine time to sigh and drag her a little… like "just once…. won't be enough, will it….? I can tell…"

"you're. already thinking about doing it all the time, aren't you…?" the response is like he read her mind and she ducks back to her task…. iiieiiiiei…..

あ：drinks it in. "Ahhh, that bad, hm…" "I should've known. It's, the kind of girl you are, isn't it, Yashiro." punctuating it with shoving forward, more firmly… sinks to the base closes eyes, winces. mhh.

つ：Hanako's new mission: i've gotta get so freaking good at controlling the . moans i gotta. meditate in a cave

あ：it's a gd test

つ：it WAS cowardly to just run from it…. I just need… endurance.

あ：It's hard to juggle talking and moving, in reality… if you try and pick up the pace, you're gonna stutter and cut off into a moan or whine. sooo difficult to hear self like that egh… the hard part.

つ：must tactically speak… and pause… hoold tongue mm tsukasa toussles nene's hair affectionately with both hands for a second……

…. then moves her head over Hanako's cock kinda… absent-mindedly. for a second some pressure…. up, down…. but just for a stroke or two. then quietly recedes

something for Nene to notice happened…. Tsukasa himself is like oh what am I doing ? idk

あ：oh well.

つ：looks on blankly its fun to watch woo

あ：i think hanako should leak pre in this moment like conspicuously just something to make nene feel like, a little crazy you really like get a taste

つ：its like. concurrent things to note. it also sorta shakes her around to get serious like AH w, wait the, finishline,,, so close

あ：Hm the wax and wane of it all… I think Hanako will have settled for a moment and been leaning into it all, but getting closer to finishing is like ah, wavers… looks like he's struggling to keep his eyes focused, gets all twitchy. slumps a bit. it FEELS so egregious when you can no longer talk clearly rly, when you've been keeping up dialogue, it's embarr. [covers mouth with a hand]

つ：want to learn how to come cooler but its so wmmarnwarm mouth good

あ：gotta work on that. feeling all jittery

つ：stamps foot. feels stupid twitch twitch fidget jitterrrrr

あ：Oh at this point I think Tsukasa is really like [stare.] but thankfully i dont think Hanako can observe this meaningfully now this is new

つ：and his little brain thinking mmmfmng… ffffin her mmmmouth. gknh.. amane losing his cool brain aaouh girl tsukasa excited to see new movements. spellbound

あ：but also for nene it is like. I WANNA SEE WHAT ITS LIKE WHEN HE COMES…. ;;;; ><….

つ：I do think a good step 1 after this IS nene just offering tsukasa to like…. hold her, face , while she does it…. like being brave w him privately like.. [puts his hands on her cheeks] you…. liked. uhm when we were… doing that…. you seemed to like. holding, like this…. …. so you can if you want…. … its only fair….

あ：twirls hair

つ：it only happened because of you…. if its fun…. you should, do it, then….. Tsukasa is like…. that was fun it would be fun…. okay…. staring. the synchronicity of tsukasa and nene doing this is going to fuck up hanako he's going to be afraid

あ：observing tsukasa when he gets a little [tumbleweed] must rly be interesting

つ：stop.. working together

あ：you need to stop conspiring [comes faster] [but hates this]

つ：staring at tsukasa's hands on yashiro's face is like. mmgm no… not. not two great tastes that taste great together i do not want this NO strawberry and cheese!!!!

あ：stop making me taste the strawberry and the cheese i dont think they should taste good together

but oh it must feel nice for nene. to just get held through it all and you feel like you're sharing something with tsukasa

つ：but tsukasa's hands being there makes you feel subconsciously more like just rutting face and its a moment of [catches self being more. facefucking] nnggh no [slows down. calms] not-- because.. of any reason, no if i do it like that i want to do it to make nene feel like a whore it cant be subconcious response. no i wont let it

あ：it should be a decision it shouldnt just happen to me

i always feel like this 'phase' should be the peak like. being unable to stop tsukasa before he does something innocently. like ah, tsukasa watching nene's hand wrapped around the base of cock, and looping his fingers around for a sec too. at times, to be helpful, angle something. the sort of stuff you can't even always notice until you've already pushed into it fervidly multiple times. again, cock makes you feel weak and able to be manipulated ww stop making me enjoy this

つ：Tsukasa is truly just not thinking hard about the impulses coming out of himself its like. me halp

nene truly is in her state of peak what are. we lol? also. what are you and hanako… i dont know would hanako-kun like it… if tsukasa-kun…..? -just doesn't know-

letting him be there at all is weird but it's always another thing entirely to… you know… Nene is familiar with porno rules. the balls don't touch etc you can have two guys and a girl and a reasonable distance

あ：Right. but well tsukasa-kun himself is… um, not afraid to think about this stuff. he likes it. so… what could hanako-kun feel…?

Though if only she could really press her brain one day and think about what Hanako does already permit. and think, like ahm. well. i guess guys in porno, don't, like, lay against the other guy and get held and nuzzled in the face. while they get stuff done

つ：briefly: what would I feel. that is my uh… boy… friend … ? [wind blowing thru head]

I guess it just doesn't… bother me. it's just tsukasa-kun…. that's his brother so, they're as close as they're going to be….

…..but …. [squeezing pea] like….. what is it…. it wouldn't be, NTR, or something…. right would I start feeling weird if Tsukasa-kun took the reigns…

あ：Really so much to ask yourself. would i feel like-? something was being taken from me-? ._.

つ：[simulates tsukasa blowing hanako] [brain flips upside down inside of skull] I uh. I don't… I don't know. how it would feel. laying in bed. Or do I

あ：Get 1000 yard stare feeding black canyon

つ：nooooo… enough of the running from anything and forming indirect thoughts….! slaps cheeks yus. going thru ur little chores

あ：But you're finally at this point liek mgh… come on girl THINK IT

つ：think it sooo hard fully form the thought. sits on corner of bed

あ：imagine Tsukasa-kun really doing it okay. and, imagine if Hanako-kun lovedi t

つ：[distant shot of her sitting on corner of bed] [zoom in with zoom lines but no change in expression] I'M HORNY

あ：welcome. to the mindfuck

つ：opens eyes and looks at floor good job nene. you're being a big girl. rn. that was a hard thought. girl [to self]

あ：A lot of other girls. Couldn't think about their boyfr.en like this

つ：it's quite taboo….. on a few levels. both infidelity (in a sense…) and….. you know. [incest]

あ：I'm uniquely mature.

Able to think about these all.

つ：these topics, they're a lot for anyone. it's good I'm not completely freaking out.

well, if Hanako-kun wanted, I would ……………………………….. be willing to sh…are…….. [sits up straight] NO, NO NO NO! STOP THINKING OF IT AS A FAVOR TO OTHERS! WE'RE PAST IT! PAST THE PHASE OF THAT! FOR REAL! ………………………………… but then what …. …..

あ：._.

つ：do I just … do I say I want to . see it for . . myself …. thats a little much

あ：Hm. Somehow… I have a feeling that it wouldn't go well, if I said it like that.

つ：it doesn't seem good either. to want your boyfriend to have sex with his . brother. for. your own pleasure. also-- thats not, entirely it? o-okay, I need to walk it back actually… maybe its OK to a little want it for Hanako-kun….. and Tsukasa-kun? Well, mostly Tsukasa-kun

あ：maybe it can just be for all of us !?

つ：it's more like, an accessory detail, really that I might be into it. it's-- a side perk. I mean, it's good I'm not…. not into it

あ：Of course, I just want them to be happy. that's the truth [writes a poem]

つ：fkldskg i must express myself you have to like lay in bed and intrusively think about being like a sexual harpy like mmmgggh fuck eachother for meeee

あ：nene-sama commands it

つ：Hanako like. trying to be like creepy and you just clipping him. get to it BROCON

あ：a fantasy where, like, it's YOUR turn to be like "i KNOWWW you want to"

oh but you know i'd love to envision an insane run where nene just is like do this for me thats new like. what if we applied everything we learned just be forward

つ：she needs to just like, jerk off tonight about this so hard and then lay starfish on the bed like OKAY

あ：>__O what's the worse that could happen Hanako-kun will say no, or make fun of me? ……………. that already happens.

つ：hanako-kun already laughs at me and makes fun of me

unfortunately there's no punishment hanako-kun should think about this stuff before he belittles me for nothing. i'm like a poorly trained dog.

this is a funny circumstance bc tsukasa will also be like jaw dropped like ?!?!!? NENE-CHAN? whoa!

あ：[pointing kid from IZ]

つ：to be like… Hanako-kun….. I…. want something… I want you to………………………. do something…. different…… if you don't want to. you can make fun of me. I don't care. [no eyes] [shockingly still and stern]

Hanako would be so👂🖐️

あ：like lmao??/ whatcha got for me queen

Literally puts hand to ear and leans in

つ：his mind is thumbing thru pornhub titles fetishes things she might be into, probability wise the kind of girl she is

あ：want me to spit on her? spank her? smack her?

つ：I….. I want. To see…………………. you………………………………………………. [Tsukasa is also floating by, leaning in]

you. ANDTSUKASA-KUN FOOL AROUND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [SUDDENLY SHOUTING] [sonic blast] [epicenter]

WHATEVER YOU WANT!!!! H. HANDJOBS???? B, BLOW, BLOWJOBS???? N-N-NECKING??? TONGUE??? [insane] WHATEVER YOU WANT TO DO!!!!!!! THE TWO OF YOU!!!! I'LL WATCH

Tsukasa's tiniest needle eyes hair blown back tooo everyone's ears are ringing. the silence. nene just fists to side. breathing.

あ：there's like blood running down hanako'[s ears

つ：hes gonna black out his little brain is like hearing it echoing handjobs? blowjobs? necking? tongue? fool around. fool around

あ：It's really like. looks at her. LOOKS AT TSUKASA? LOOKS AT HER. you PRANKING ME ?

つ：tsukasa is also doubletaking but like you're both clearly so clueless tsukasa. like i had no idea this was anything. mentally. whoa.

あ：he's having his own version of repeating things, but slower. tongue..........................

つ：fool around ........

あ：This really should be such a cray move that Hanako cannot actually say anything for a good min

つ：you've stunned the boys to silence

あ：you killed him. for asec. you're not speaking human language it's almost like. how can i address this. i can't

つ：you're not ready for any of this.

あ：what could i possibly say [quietly floats further from tsukasa] [backs up]

つ：tsukasa looks at that looks at nene. who is just like staring at the ground. also silent. she's just a stone. she's very ready for anything…. you can feel her holding so much in. just letting this pass over everyone in the room as it will….

"so brave, nene-chan…" tsukasa finally says….. "you really think about that?" she nods "you would like it?" nods. "why?" flinches

あ：[hanako's pupils focus] [center of eye] [looks]

つ：Nene's little brain… struggling. a childish question…. honestly, she doesn't quite entirely know them all…. so well…. the reasons. but why not be the most mockable, first? isn't it what hanako wants to say? "It. Would be hot."

"I thought about it, and, that I'd want to see it. A. And." swallows…. "maybe. if you'd like to do it, that'd be nice. For. All three of us." "If it was-- if it was-- if-- if you'd ever, second-guess doing it, because I'm here. I want you to know, to not do that." "I won't be jealous. Or. Feel. Ch. cheated on? uhm.." getting slightly awkward

"I mean, I won't feel weirdly about it…… in that way…." "so, now or later, if you ever wanted to.." [getting weaker] "if you did anything, you wouldn't have to worry…… about my response……." "if you know where I stand….."

あ：I do think internally, Hanako is like 'HOT'? YOU'RE ASKING, BECAUSE IT WOULD BE HOT. but tongue still is lead. just stares incredulously… I think Nene seems to be moving at such a faster pace, she's talking faster than he can scrape his braincells together to reply. just reeling.

つ：Tsukasa drinks in the reply, it's so interesting.. "Really? You wouldn't be jealous?" shakes head he's just like wow most people are. two-timing is bad you know "Nene-chan is into two-timing?" "IT'S NOT REALLY-- I mean, it doesn't feel like that…. !" getting a little tweedle dee tweedle dum while hanako loads

"Th-that's what I'm saying really, it wouldn't feel like … uhm… a breech, or something…."

Tsukasa glances at Amane, but without intent for eye contact… just to try to read his expression a little, out of corner of eye..

"Just. Think of me as a. A. Stupid, girl into that kind of thing….." trying to preempt the mockery aloud… "s-so, if nobody wants to, it's just funny, okay…..?"

あ：Indeed really like. having the babiest conversation suddenly. hanako inhales and rubs his face, pushes back bangs and hat for a sec. Feels like he's getting too hot in his jacket and everything, tugs collar.

The childishness they're both exuding suddenly makes him feel like, okay. [big brother mode] break it up… but Nene's preempting is like mmhh well. you understand that much

"Okay, okay okay, calm down…" closes eyes. a long inhale. but…. he's really not as put-together as he'd like, feels his mouth twitching at the corners. Trying to move past this procedurally, not make Yashiro cry… "I get it, you have a 'thing' for it. I know people are into… twins, is that it-? -- well, whatever, it's. I mean, it's nice of you to offer, to not be jealous." condescending. "But, that's not how it is. Between us." [gesturing back and forth between him and tsukasa]

つ：Tsukasa feels: ah. but gracefully and seamlessly

あ："We wouldn't 'like that'."

つ：Nene looks at Hanako, feeling small.. fleetingly. its fine though…. but, looks at Tsukasa, kinda sadly….? Tsukasa smiles at her but doesn't say anything……. Nene squints at him… twists her mouth….

あ：[reclines in the air, crosses leg]

つ：At length, Nene finally says…. "…. you said We…….. but…………. don't you mean…. you……? wouldn't like it…."

あ：... ? arguing with me. why. cracks eye open at

つ：sortof feeling like. mm… I mean obviously….ah… uhm….. "Tsukasa-kun……. you would like it…. wouldn't you?"

Tsukasa keeps smiling at her…. ahh what a funny position to be in….! Ahhh…. hmmm! mmm….

あ："I meant we." stubborn "You're just projecting onto Tsukasa."

つ：Nene keeps looking at Tsukasa. Like…. mm… I'm not-- ????! Tsukasa is like whuh. whoa! conversation….. uhmm…. but just twiddles his fingers like a toddler… "I don't need anything…." like heehee awwuuuu me? little ol me

あ：…………….. wait that's not the reply i wanted. tilts head

つ：it's hard for Nene to place the-- mmmgghh--! like… rrurghh its not… mmm "I'm… not projecting….! It's-- it's so rare for Tsukasa-kun to-- (sorry) show a new feeling, and so-- so I notice when he… does! I've….seen him……" "look….. at you……"

あ：really don't like to hear that. like, don't be gay turns head. "He's always looking at me."

つ：Nene holds Tsukasa's hand. IGNORES YOU

あ："It's nothing new."

つ："Tsukasa-kun……. you…. want to do what I do sometimes, don't you…..?" [does not have a mouth now] feeling like a pet asked to misbehave. dont you wanna go apeshit dont you wanna chew amane's shoes. well

あ：hruu hruu… of course we all want to chew shoes…

つ：a very very long pause….. i'm sure hanako isn't even looking and is frustrated by all of this

あ：No he's not observing it up close. he's like whatever. tilts hat over my eyes I already said what I had to

つ：maybe just feels like, ah she's doubling down fsr….. sigh

あ：She just needs to sulk about her idea not being accepted

つ："hai." really small from Tsukasa. but he's like. fingies together "it looks fun…." she's like POINT

あ：THERE IT IS!!!

つ："EXACTLY!!!!" "Tsukasa-kun, you're just always thinking about what Hanako-kun wants!" "uhhuh"

"BUTWHATIFYOUCOULD-- HAVEANYTHING!!" throws hands up in air tsukasa is like… eyes wide. uoh anything puts finger to mouth……

あ：Hanako is feeling like wtf i looked away for 1 second whats going on

つ："ah, but Amane doesn't want to" "HE DIDN'T WANT THE OTHER STUFF EITHER-- OR HE SAID--!" devil horns "we can't trust him always! I-- mean. Maybe this is a little far." "-- BUT also most people would say its ALREADY PRETTY FAR, so"

あ：

つ："--ANYWAY-- TSUKASA-KUN!" "HAI" "YOU WANT IT!!" "HAI." "do you want anything in particular!??!?!" long long pause………………………………………………………………………………………. "chu." "…chu…….?"

あ：this is going to make nene like weep 💔nooo

つ：falls to the ground hands to the floor "chu…………………………." he really just said chu…… my soul is leaving my body…..

あ：It's like ah. The soft "hai" from Tsukasa finally admitting he would likey, like kinda fails to load into hanako. and then they're off to the races and rambling and he's like staggering to catch up, hey hey hey… but once nene is like WE CANT TRUST HIM i think he really freezes and becomes a little statue. like whatre you saying 😭 wait was starting to stammer like chotto matte

つ：he's gone to them theyre in their bubble "Tsukasa-kun, you have to want more than 'chu'…… I can't handle that meek of a desire, actually….." shaking on her arms

あ：but you know I think the truth of Hanako in such a situation, is that, he would rather make sweeping statements about him and tsukasa mutually being 'fixed'… Our relationship is what it always was, we're just brothers. if you think you see something, you're imagining it, or projecting. tsukasa is just weird, he's clingy, he just likes to be here, but it doesn't change anything. he's "just" my little brother

if we so clearly establish Tsukasa. wants. things. it puts him in a position to. REJECT? him. and it's like n i don i dont like that either

つ：Dont like to make choices

あ：it feels cruel, like why did you just set me up to "turn down" tsukasa this is…. illogical i shouldnt have to

つ：Tsukasa meanwhile already just feels turned down and he simply is graceful of it

getting way too simple about it like: "awe, but Amane doesn't wanna, so….." when nene argues its like g,mfgh "I like to watch, its ok Nene-chan!" confused pat her

あ：Fucking. slides between you two grabs Tsukasa by the shoulders

つ：ouhp oh noes

あ："Tsukasa."

つ：me in trubble nods Im gonna get scolded ouh "hai."

あ：[kinda like. desperate.] "... Yashiro is just getting carried away, right...?"

つ：looks down at Yashiro on teh floor like. little tears coming outta her eyebolls "carried away?"

あ："You don't really want that." continues, pressingly. "Right-? I mean. But why would you, all of a sudden. It's the same as it's always been, right."

つ：oh but the. "Uhhuh" it is the same as its always been. Nene from the floor, strangled: "its…. the same… in that….. " shes dying "you've…………………………………….." "wanted it…………………………………………………………………. the whole. time" rasping "isn't that right. Tsukasa-kun" like its her last words

あ："Okay, this is what I mean, by 'carried away'."

つ："Eh? She's right" Nene collapses onto the floor

あ：you know when griffin is like ahh my bean. and then is liek THE BALLS ARE BACK IN THE ORIGINIAL CUPS [STRANGLED] this is nene

つ：yes. LMGMNMgjg ahhhh steaming on the ground. "It's the same, nothings changed!"

"you and nene-chan are both kinda right?" too casual

あ：You're really hurting his little Amane brain. he understands this part its the same

つ：from the floor: "its that………………… you wanting it…… is the same…………" curled on her side "thats why--" "it doesnt feel different" curling in "to Hanako-kun" shuddering

あ：looks at her looks at you looks at her looks at you

つ："he's used to it. so, used to it," "that he's……………….. BLIND" COUGHS

あ：[arguing] "THAT'S JUST HOW TSUKASA IS"

つ：nene is like i understand everything… ho god the shape of the universe… too big for my brain

あ：don't you tell me about my brother wtf

つ："it is…." rasping

"It is." Tsukasa agrees. like whats going on

あ：[furrows brow] "It. Is." !?!?/ gf f what tf conversation are we having

つ："But if Amane doesn't want something, I don't need it."

Nene dragging herself forwardddd… "Tsukasa-kun… is too used…. to having……… it be what it is……!" cough…. "he cant…" shaking a fist in the air weakly "he can't…. dream…. of more….." Tsukasa touches her fist like a truck would tuch

あ：his little amane brain its just like stop it… youre making it sound like its all on me or something

つ：tfw it is all on amane

あ：what, so its my fault that tsukasa cant have what he wants

つ：master overlord slave the situation. i know i have total ownership but

あ：frowns thinking about him having such a petulant… like ah… slowly relinquishing Tsukasa. and getting reduced, like. "I d. I don't want us to feel. Differently." Helplessly looking around. mrghh. RUFFLES OWN HAIR REALLY FAST takes off hat

つ：tsukasa earnestly: ah handsem mmm… gazes at with little pin eyes as always amane really is feeling stuff rn…. what an interesting day

あ：struggling to word it. like. I'm not……………. trying to… REJECT???????????????????????????? YOU?? you just hate the concept of this being spun like its unrequited

つ：its rough its like mnghr.. but you also dont want. to clarify. that tsukasa wants you. its hard

あ：…. I DIDNT MURDER YOU IN A JEALOUS PASSION TO LIKE… MAKE IT SEEM LIKE I'M SHOOTING YOU DOWN LATER

つ：you dont want to unnecessarily clarify you're not rejecting, if you haven't properly clarified. tsukasa is so into it. but you dont wanna do that ohhh i'll stab you with my knife but we cant. watever seems INSANE

I think a fun wildcard would be tsukasa going "we sorta did stuff once" Nene: "eh"

あ："Eh."

つ："Amane got us sake" "eh"

あ：tilts head

つ："our parents kept it in a cabinet." "we were just role-playing, though." "so it wasn't really me. I was a lady." Nene lifts herself on her palms ???????????????

あ：nene is going to feel so

つ：furrows brow.

あ：opening crawls are supposed to catch you up to speed not make you go Wait run that by me again

つ："Amane was Amane, though....."

あ："Tsukasa what are you... talking about."

つ："you got really sick after it" "you were in bed the next day, whole day" "and, you said we can't have sake again, so we didn't"

あ："N…nnh, wait, I mean. I remember that." brushes past it. "but what do you mean roleplay-?"

touches temple. its like heoughh looks like he's trying to have a psychic vision

つ："what do you mean roleplay." nene sitting up on the floor

あ："I do remember we dug around… for fun, we just wanted to try it. But, it just made me sick, and I couldn't…" SLOWING, FEELING BLOOD FREEZE. "….remember…. anything…."

つ：nene "you don't remember…………………………….."

あ：nene is so extremely in this BL vn

つ："Amane was always looking at those magazines. with the girls" "so I was pretending to be like that" "He wanted to think about girls, after the sake" looking pleasant "it was fun. It was sorta like what you do." "is that fooling around?"

あ：you put amane in SUCH a position. of like. oh mygod i can't be guy who will only do stuff with his brother if he's sloshed and also his brother is pretending to be a girl from a porn mag that's actually a new echelon of creep that i'm not ready for you know its literally this emotion though.

yashiro, no, don't see me like thsi

つ：no. my image

あ：makes brocon seem like small potatoes

つ：Nene though like actually a new kind of sad "….. he pretended you were a girl……" like jfc…. no…. i wanted to feel uplifted "Tsukasa………….kun….." crawls up to grasp at his hakama "I like you just the way you are, okay….?"

あ："-- I WASN'T THINKING CLEARLY! OBVIOUSLY!"

つ：Tsukasa: wow, so many emotions rn

あ："I WAS DRUNK!! AND WE WERE… I DON'T EVEN KNOW-!!"

つ："eeoouuuhh… 10?" "11?"

あ："-- HOW CAN I TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR 10-YEAR-OLD ME" [is 13]

つ："It was fun. It doesn't gotta happen again."

あ："But-- no, ugh… I!!!!!!!!!!!!" [cant even finish the sentence, hand just held up pointing in air] ….. [tries again] "-- Tsukasa doesn't need to be different, or something-!!" "I'm not asking him to be any different-!!! He can be the same forever!!!!!!!!!"

つ："Amane has Nene-chan now, so he doesn't need to pretend with me"

あ：[SCREAMING] "-- THAT'S NOT-!!!"

つ：Nene's "IT CAN'T BE MY FAULT--"

あ："TSUKASA!"

つ：tsukasa: whoa, nobody liked that

"TSUKASA-KUN!" "Nene-chan is a real girl"

あ：[devastated] "I WASN'T JUST PRETENDING WITH YOU BECAUSE YASHIRO WASN'T THERE!!!"

つ："so you don't need sake"

あ："I NEVER NEEDED IT!!!"

つ："but it didn't happen any other time"

Nene like to herself: "I can't, it can't be, me, breaking you two up, no…." "I don't wanna get between…"

あ："N- no, that's not what I was getting at-- I mean, I meant I didn't need it to do that, I didn't take it to do that, it just. Happened, I guess! But we. You remember-!! We were just, curious what it did."

つ：nods, nods

あ：[eyes spiraling] "but it's not like I need you to pretend to be a girl for me or something, you're. You're always you." sputters. "Look, this conversation is, crazy-- you're both crazy-- I never said it'd be gross-!"

"I JUST. WAS SAYING. IT'S NOT OUR RELATIONSHIP."

つ：Nene snapping out of it to listen to that. little electricity

"Yeah, it's not." flatly. no emphasis. tsukasa says. "I'm Amane's twin brother!"

あ：[feeling soothed] "That's right…" [pets head…]

つ：mmmm… enjoys. leans into mmmm

あ："You'll always be that. Okay."

つ：Nene, frustrated on the floor: "no. you can't start it all back over!" "after all of that!!!"

あ："You-!!"

つ：POINTS "TSUKASA-KUN! YOU DID SAY YOU WANTED MORE!!! YOU SAID YOU WANTED TO KISS!" "AND YOU LIKED BEING A GIRL FOR AMANE!!! You don't know it, but you're TRAPPED in the role of 'brother'!!"

"YOU THINk that because Amane has me, a real girl, now, that he'd have no reason to want you, in that way!" "… THAT'S SAD! RIGHT? THAT'S TOTALLY SAD….!"

"so you'll just be his brother forever, while I get to be his girl, 'cuz I'm a girl and not his brother" sounding insane

あ：hanako is like 😭!? AND??!?@wtGKF,DKLF;SD'

つ："And I get to do all of the girl stuff"

あ："WHAT, ARE YOU GOING TO SAY YOU WANT TO DO THE BROTHER STUFF NEXT."

つ："IF I HAD TO:!!??!" doesnt know what she means

Tsukasa listening "is it sad…." thinking deeply….. "I like being Amane's brother……" looking down at the floor…….

あ：[sternly] "You can't stop being my brother." [oppressive aura]

つ：Nene. "You don't have to stop being his brother....."

あ："Would this conversation stop if we kissed."

つ：Tsukasa's hair flies up for a second m ? Nene's too

あ：Jostles the treat bag

つ：everyone looks at amane with massive anticipation

あ：and fucking. take control of the table

つ：tsukasa….. does a quiet… chu……?

あ：[inhales] "Yeah. Okay, fine. Like, if we already did stuff…" grits teeth. "Like, whatever. Sure! Let's prove it can be sober and without a whole roleplay, and it'll be fine. And then after you both can stop thinking about it like tragic and sad."

I'VE DECIDED, TALKING ABOUT IT FOR ANY LONGER IS GOING TO MAKE ME INSANE its feeling so small potatoes rn

Just a little kiss??? like, god, you princesses

つ：Tsukasa. the floor is kindof falling out from under him no mouth staring.

あ：[grabs jaw]

つ：aaogkgh… does not understand how the situation lead to this at al Nene is staring. seeing tsukasa's response is breaking her to pieces but she is stilll like shes watching deer eat flowers she's paying close attention, so she can see his breathing quickening…

あ：You've just made nii-chan so depressed at the concept of Tsukasa being like. some unfulfilled girl trapped being his younger brother. like jesus christ…

I think it's fluid tbh. Just grabs face and dips thinking to self ITS JUST A KISS. GOD!!!!!!!

つ：Tsukasa whines

あ：[air becomes different]

つ：grabs at front of gakuran feebly

あ：[humidity increases] [chest hurts] but… must prove point… persist.

つ：breathes into your face

あ：looking at Yashiro through a narrowed eye, like… You see this?

つ：ohsb she sees it

あ：Pupil drifts to look at Tsukasa… but then goes, mn. no. closes eyes. Inhales… Leans in. It's fine… [arrogant minded] I'm a good kisser. I get why Yashiro wants to watch sicko

つ：its a lot. the layers so thick thicker than she could have ever imagined. the air

tsukasa suddenly looking sf weak, reduced, tiny. never seen tsukasa seem so …. overwhelmed….. swear you see his hands shake a little against the black gakuran…..

あ：What a sight…

つ：this will stop the conversation indeed

あ：I think it simultaneously feels like she has fought so hard for Tsukasa's sake.. and ah like 'what. have i done.'

Hand holding jaw strokes with a thumb. Amane's other hand grasps at Tsukasa's wrists. … trying to ah… do his usual, ~feeling benevolent~ deal. but. Quietly.. Tsukasa could feel his hand trembling too. Chest… really hurts. … barreled at something. painful.

You're also stuck there thinking about. ah, all those years ago, sake night… what happened… frustrated at the murky, half-formed memories. It's just feelings. Not really typically reflecting on life that often, these days, anyhow… rusty at it.

つ：maybe having a moment of . wishing you were doing it for a better… reason. not… frustrated. is that any better than doing it cuz of sake….. if you did? to prove a point….

あ：You got like, argued into doing this… That really doesn't feel any less scummy You didn't just say, "ah, I want to do it too"

つ：Tsukasa is passive.... he doesnt lean any pressure into it. he only waits for Amane's pressure. you have to use your hand to push him into you firmer, if you want to

あ：As is expected… Tilts his head up Persisting forward, but feeling like a coward, like… can't look at what Tsukasa's expression is doing rn…

つ：can't handle it….. wet little anticipating eyes, sparkling tooo much Nene's here to look at it all, though

あ：Also dunno how long this 'ought to' be. when will it be 'satisfying'… sigh. guess tsukasa would just let it last however long he chooses to. mrghhh…. feels lip snarl (edited) like of course. it's Tsukasa's entire nature.

つ：it is the way he is...

あ：Lick teef…

つ：aaaaaahhhh mmm a… fidget, paw at… tap foot situation

the conversation didnt overwhelm tsukasa at all, but the result of it is thinking very hard about how this isn't… about pretending, like it was before

so its explicitly between the two of them…Amane directly…. and what Nene said was so interesting….

あ：Suddenly launched into this interaction…

つ：he never would or could think of it as being trapped being a brother, of course she's got her own foolish spin (few people can, understand, incest, really, so nene has a simple view)

but…. there's stilll something sortof sticking about it all…. he hadnt thought of anything as limited… more like…. whatever he was allowed was glorious, and as it all came from the relationship of brother, he owes everything to what that means, or else Amane wouldn't even look at him

Amane had no friends, only his brother. so , it was the best thing, to be the only thing to be

あ：It was the most prized, precious position in Amane's life back then… at this point, inarguably yorishiro seal and all…

つ：it was the only thing to think about being….. and everything it entailed was more than incredible

あ：No one else got to be that

While, I think Amane is frustrated/depressed by his own motivations, I feel like for Tsukasa it's also interesting to digest the motivation to explicitly do this w/o sake, w/o roleplay. like, Amane himself wants this to be its own thing, in the present moment

つ：Nene really is… nene, she's different. having what she has, it's so hard to apply to self…. to Tsukasa it is a very sincere gesture, interesting to want to do

Amane was upset at the iidea it was sake, or that, being a girl had any sort of thing to do with it… or not being a girl…. which is confusing for tsukasa-- it seems like, just normal stats facts? plain and simple things? well, the sake makes you funny, do funny things, even if you're a grown up, like wanting to pretend your brother is a girl its just a silly thing. people take it to be silly, cuz its fun to be silly

あ：It was never a tragic thing to Tsukasa… just a night they had, they might as well have just played a specific game together.

つ：neither of them are capable of understanding all it did briefly unravel, which was just the undercurrent of mutual attraction and willingness. thats all really

it's like anything! it's like, ah technically it's a kind of fooling around, is all….

Amane wants to prove though, that it wasn't about conditions or qualifications……

あ：doki doki…

つ：but if it isn't about conditions or qualifications.. can it just…. happen…..? as easily as it does for Nene…….?

if it wasn't the conditions of being 10, or, sake, or, being a girl or not, then there's nothing to it but a thing you can do…… mm. its like aoaoo… no, that doesn't mean it'll happen more, does it…..

I like when, Hanako finally pulls away, Tsukasa just earnestly squeaking out the question, "will that happen more, sometimes….?" just confused… really…

あ：drop an anvil on him like oh my god right away huh

つ：is it the 1 'proving'…. ? is the new 'condition', 'proving'? the 'condition' replacing 'age, sake, gender, game' will I need to wait for another moment for 'proving' something? or…. does it just happen?

あ：[rubs mouth with back of hand] "… if I feel like it." now everyone shut up💔

つ：💞if he fffeels like it….? the new condition then, is 'when Amane feels like it'….. likes that💞 eeheeheheheheheheehe. giggles and nuzzles face a lot

あ：eugh.

つ：nuzzzzzzlenuzzlenuzzle nuuuzzle Nene claps

あ：okay okay.

つ：wipes a tear from her eye

あ：[holding tsukasa by the waist on reflex] [really looks at him. like raises brow.] ………………. i cant resist cuz im shitty…….. "… was it that good."

つ：as tsukasa rubs his face all over yours, you regretably feel the wetness of his eyes rubbing all over you

あ："Already thinking about it happening again."

つ："HAIIIIiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeieeieeeeeeeeeeee" tippytoes leaning into

あ："So you're both that desperate and needy."

つ："HAAAAIIIIIIII" I guess SOOooo Nene is like. mghk. but.. laughs ah, finally… the mockery. she was waiting for

あ：[rubs back mindlessly.]

つ：Tsukasa laughs with Nene "Nene-chan!" reaches a hand out to her "your idea…. was good" "Amane will do what he feels like doing."

あ：Thinking about the girlies like holding hands

つ：they simply do. heehee hheuu

あ：Amane watches this like. static and unmoving.

つ：Nene is liek "I'm so happy for you, Tsukasa-kun….."

あ：mutters. "Ugh. Maybe you are like, a girl, Tsukasa." "I see it, actually."

つ：Nene is AGOG

あ：like what the fuck!

つ：its like wtf that is your brother excuse me

"are these a girl's feelings?" tsukasa asks plainly

あ：the thought that hanako-kun could already allude to THAT TIME HE-? MAYBE DID STUFF WITH TSUKASA-KUN…

"Yeah. I don't have those."

つ：NENE DOESN'T LIKE THIS

"Hanako-kun…."

あ："I guess, maybe I just understood it all, for a moment. Back then." lol

"Yashiro."

つ："It has to be about everyone but you, doesn't it………." squinting at you. i'm becoming too smart

あ：raises brow tf… getting saucy?

つ："uo? It's still tense." Tsukasa looking at everyone

あ："It's not tense."

つ："mmm....."

あ："Yashiro's just struggling to accept how you're both completely obsessed with me." "So, it IS about you two."

つ：well ok. that's a very fair get

あ："I can't control the fact that you both want me so badly."

つ："…. I wasn't projecting onto Tsukasa-kun….." turns this into a beautiful moment thru her heart. "I was… relating, to Tsukasa-kun." swaying his hand in hers

"you do look at Hanako-kun the same way I do…." "It hurt to watch, sometimes." Tsukasa tilting his head "did it….?" its like uoh….

あ：looks too

つ：nene is so interesting

あ：thinking about hanako being half hard ambiently through this at this point

つ：the effects.

the funny thing about this scene is nene is incidentally on the floor on her knees and the boys are like just upright embracing next to her the look of them all talking rn

its so funny for hanako to be like arms around tsukasa. lingering tsukasa draped on amane but reaching his arm down to hold nene's hand

maybe a fine ender is Tsukasa just dragging Nene forward by the hand to Amane's cock and directing her to take care of it

あ：i felt dis

つ：like he notices it. and is like oh..... well!

あ：this is the ultimate.

つ：get Amane sucked off while hugging and nuzzling him.

あ：like, nene gets to feel smug for a sec whats all this then

つ：sooooo smug ohhh what could it be indeed. is silent butit doesnt help hanako feel less about it

she's like. i willl be benevolent i will not call him out i will simply start sucking him off unbuckles gracefully

あ：all the reassurance you need here. mmmm it was worth it i was so smart and braev

hanako just has to be silent in the end like whatever hold tsukasa. fine get my dick sucked cuz you all love this

つ：everyone. fine!!! HAVE AT ME. YUO ANIMALS

あ：[just vents frustrations by death gripping tsukasa]

つ：mm but in my mind hanako is a little like whats next is tsukasa gonna start macking on me ? [crickets chirp. tsukasa will never instigate the kiss himself, not anytime soon anyway] you really are just hold him

あ：The ball is in your court, psycho this'll make you feel worse in reality

つ：I bet yashiro is so wet right now. freak so-- horny for, seeing us kiss all. dripping. down there probably, visibly shiny under her skirt. probably seeping thru the tights

あ：oooh

つwas jerking off all night about this ig, before trying to talk about it been envisioning it in her crazy little head. inher bed at night

あ：Just how your whore mind needs to conduct its business, I suppose going to bend you over

つ：ooo you want meto fuckgyou while i kis my brothre [hasnt noticed how jittery and fast he's pumping] oohhhim jsut suspposed to have you adn tsukas a inmylap nowbegging for a turn

[mind going back tot he beginning of the convo] wait she didnt only say kissing she was thinking about handjobs and blowjobs what the fuck…. ooohhhhh???? youy want meto finger you whil tsukasa sucskk me off/?

あ：have you really been thinking about this!?

つ：got all emotional at the end got distracted but you were just being really horny thinking about us straight up fucking. 'fooling around'...

あ：Oh and I'm just supposed to... be like yeah, sure, I'll love that thanks for the OK, Yashiro

つ：ohhh thank god I was scared you'd judge me I'll do whatevern i want to tsuaksa i dont ened permission

あ：You don't get how this works If I wanted to fuck him I would just fuck him [brain boiling]

つ：not worried about how it'll make my gf feel its about how i want my. cock to feel ok

あ：i. killed him with my own hands i'm not afraid to do things to him. rhgh .gnjg hf [comes]

つ：oh gkldfg the funniest guy on the planet comes so hard it makes yashiro cough

あ：becomes a hose

つ：a good long nut

あ：she will just walk away from this like jesus. i guess he really liked to kiss his brother

つ：she will quietly. log that was a crazy. orgasm

あ：the nut was different.

つ：may as well be that you edged him th e entire conversation how long was he half-hard. before any of you noticed

あ：having after shocks of twitching… another stream… I think ther'es something wrong with Hanako-kun.

つ：much to.. investigate.

あ：going to be at home later like, tf could that RP have been like. oh it was just so passionate gahhhhhtta ask tsukasa-kun about it later

つ：truly a haunting thing to be told, that they jsut fooled around as kids. later interview tsukasa about itlgdfg yesh but the deets will be like: he's been. sleazy. for this long

あ：Make your skin crawl like oh Tsukasa can tell you things he did and said

つ：in my mind its just like pantomime and humping and stuff which is sad in its own way to her like, jfc all of that feeling and he just rubbed it on tsukasa and came in his . pants.

あ：Just dab her tears with a hankie It's her mission to let Tsukasa feel more in this life

wish she could just wig hanako so hard though like Ah, it was different… after you kissed. It felt… Different, when Hanako-kun… [gestures]

つ：Tsukasa would be so like waaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!! she's like i 'll be keeping track of this. any time. you. are involved what its like.

あ：I'll tell you later. Okay.

つ：tsukasa like hai…! looks up … I wonder when the next time Amane will feel like doing it will be… nene you… you could kiss him, I think…. blinks at you. …. no, he said when he feels like it. so, it's up to him. he might not feel like it

あ：But we can't trust him Tsukasa-kun… people don't just kiss each other like that without there being… [fujo who writes poems voice] something there… oh right! Amane said you play games Just try it… okay!!!

つ：Nene-chan knows a lot about this stuff oh right! Amane said you play games games all about dating

あ：Dont like hearing this like. oh he's talked about that >:T Ooh. I hope you kiss him do this for me

つ：looking at the ground….. hard 2 think about

あ：its just like, when you helped me before, though-! … so, what, if he has to stop it, is it so bad… [she's trying so hard for you] but nene is so surel like…. HE WONT STOP IT-!!!

つ：poor Tsukasa i kinda think he'd get close to Amane's face and Nene would be like SPARKLING EYES and then she'd watch tsukasa get no mouth and turn away just hving a lil period of feeling like. oh i dunno… twiddles fingers for hanako i think its funny to be like. ah--! ff.. fuck, he's about to…. [isn't]

あ：Indeed though. oh poor baby

well geez. fine then i wont either. it's not like i want to.

つ：nene watches that happen FKSL!!!!

あ：you watch hanako moodily turn away it's SO FRUSTRATING.

つ：gotta be a day tho amane talks to tsukasa and is like. frustrated that tsukasa collabs with nene lately like ok. well me too i'll do it too. hey tsukasa. you should find out what Yashiro really wants most. you know you guys talk, right? she mentioned a lot of stuff that first time things came up. I wonder what she really wants to happen.

あ：[swirling finger on a surface] You know, there's quite a difference between a kiss and a handjob… even, the difference between a kiss and necking is a bit much. I wonder, what she was envisioning would happen.

つ：she'll probably tell you…..

Tsukasa is just like okei………! it does sound interesting

あ：Mmmh. Yeah, you do that. Do your big brother a favor, okay? pet.

つ：such a fucking dirty story girls conversation wth hard to imagine though i do think tsukasa could get nene to talk about it but.

her brain like THE HOTTEST… THING//??? THAT I WOULD MOST WANT???

あ：[propeller hat spinning]

つ：brain becomes the soup

あ：oh i want to hear dirty story girls though now this is some new shit

つ：but like. the first thing she thought about was. fsr. blowjob. tsukasa

maybe Nene could simply want…. a reversal in a sense, of the first blowjob scenario… simple but, like. holding and comforting and kissing. hanako while tsukasa……. goes she can lay that out. but then be like………….. …………….. well, I mean, thats waht I thought at first……… …………………………………

あ：tsukasa leans in there's more?

つ：w, well.. I guess I did think about….. when you pulled me over to hanako-kun after everything…. i thought you'd maybe keep kissing… hehe. so… mmm~…. [becoming whimsical in mind. becoming whore]

あ：seeing such tapestries

つ：[brain blast] AH, I didn't think about................. penetration ...... [simply envisions hanako plowing her while making out with tsukasa] ettooo.... mmm heehe... eeooo...

あ：but ah, it… sounds nice, doesn't it… 👉👈hehe…💦

つ：maybe Hanako-kun….. doing that…. to me…. but euo, kissing you…. OR, ahhh, or, wait….. ahhh, mmm, you could g, g [gets dizzy] get it ready, first……

??? ready ???

あ：[twirling hair in fingers]

つ：g. your-- put, spit… get, his, thing wet… [becoming stupid] it makes it go in, easier tsukasa, pleasantly: that sounds helpful!

あ：m… mhmm…!

つ：yashiro turning the triangle cylinder sphere aohhh. wait.gg..

あ：Umh…. it's um, it takes effort, you know.. to get it in… have to hold it, and… it would be helpful, to have more hands… [rambling]

she really is rotating the pyramid rn

つ：[getting off of the helpful track] youcould jerk him, off int. into or on, to me. hhhhe could just sit there… [LIKE A KING drools]

i wish yashiro could be so cumbrained. i want it for her to be so like aofookhm the possibilities are endless ohhh gfm

Tsukasa: what about the other word. necking? Yashiro: [closes eyes reeling remembering. words and things]

あ：it's a safespace.. she deserves it… this is a girl who has endured so much. but i think she could be this bold if she felt sure about their history, being, like loaded. knowing they've messed around and that tsukasa shares her feefees like well if we're all down then fucking.. anything could happen

つ：like. hanako obviously is soo into it. god

y. yeah I. could work on him while the, you two. necking…..

あ：I think Hanako-kun would like doing that, to you…. //// and it would /// be h. hot! to watch

つ：having a moment of like hehheeuoouhu marks on tsukasa AND me....

あ：matching… uohh g….

つ：m, maybe us both….. on our knees, that would be good too….. he can make us take turns……………………………… uhm. touching it or.. together……

あ：i would like a girl to run all around the bend, it is definitely conveyed it's beyond efficiency. it's so indulgent and lavishing.

つ：Tsukasa's magical mind logging every word of this to recite to hanako later

あ：[wrrrrrr] His eyes may as well be a camera recorder

つ：he holds inhuman capability for knowledge and memorization

あ：I think Hanako-kun would like us both……… [quietly] under him…. don't you think it'd make him feel…………………………… [really, admitting. liking something here] [sigh] important….

He likes to feel… important… He. He likes to feel like we're , 'obsessed' with him. [closes eyes]

つ：Tsukasa nodding. also. buzzing at being, under he really hasn't thought about this all…. it beinga sortof mission for amane has displaced his processing a little

He does…… It feels good to make him feel important!!

あ：Slowly inundated with this all It just makes Nene seem so capable of dreaming for Amane's behalf

つ：Nene's magical ability to dream FOR others....!

あ：she knows what he is like… she's thinking about what amane likes… ah, so magical

i'd like nene to also get to humbly be like. at the end of this . like. [coughs] and. ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm………… maybe, just for me. i would. enjoy. umm. getting to feel 'it'. inside. while also. maybe. one of you. also. in my mouth. sounmds. fun

as a girl i think about what i can do.

つ：she gets to be twirl hair twiddle thumbs…. if that would be fun….. Tsukasa is just like !?!? OUH… SURE !!

あ：like alskdfghdf... whoa-!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

つ：If Amane would like it…!! nene, crazy: you could, also, kissing during that.

あ：8U o3o ?

つ：so much!!!

あ：when i think about hanako digesting nene's 100 desires for him/tsukasa slowly. i feel like he winds up feeling like, You know actually I need to see it for myself. Yashiro getting horny about the prospect. and plans to do some sort of fake out where in the middle of something he makes Tsukasa get on his knees in front of him. and both Tsukasa and Nene ARE like [praying mantis eyes really looking] and Hanako observes this. and is like. Mongrels.

つ：poor tsukasa really is like idk💔 its if amane feels like it…. so when it seems to crest its very [no mouth] feel like it…………?

あ：surely starstruck… it's like you're placed in a timeline you didn't know could exist

Ah but you know, for Hanako, I think this time he can actually be perceptive and distinctly note that Tsukasa IS receptive, anticipating… and this is something heavy to swallow.

This little ploy forces you to perceive it

つ：they both really await my command… sigh….

あ：Simply the truth.

#22 #ghosties #i

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