#truly one of the underrated wags

[formulawolff]

carmen just exudes elegance and high fashion!!! i don't know if i want to be her or be with her!!!

[recurring-polynya]

Bleach Returns 2024 - Day 7 - Aftermath

This was the first thing I started for Bleach Returns 2024, and the last thing I finished. For theme weeks like this, it's always nice to have ideas that can fit under more than one of the prompts, in case you have to switch it around. This one could just as well have ended up under "Unlikely Pairs" -- they day I turned out to have skipped, but I needed the extra time, and I think it fits better as an "Aftermath" story anyway.

In any case, I have held the belief in my heart for ages that a truly underrated part of the Blood War was the fact that out of everyone in the Gotei, the only two people that got to see Komamura's wolf-man form were Iba and Hinamori, and I wanted to know if they ever talked about it later. I accidentally wrote it in the present tense, so it came out about a thousand times more melancholy than I intended it to be, but I'm actually pretty happy with how it came out. Consider this my Komamura Tribute Fic: you were a real one, sir, and for, like, 30 seconds you were a total smokeshow. Somehow I doubt you truly gave up your heart for good.

Rated T for one mild curse and endorsing lying to your boss | read on ao3 |

---

"Why are you asking me?" Rukia frowns. "Renji is a perfectly adequate liar." And your friend, she doesn't add.

Hinamori has an answer for this. She would have preferred to ask Renji, too. "He's too nice," she explains. "I know that I'm really bad at this, and he'll tell me I'm fine when I'm not. This is important. I need to do it right."

Rukia screws up her face and for a moment, Hinamori worries that she feels insulted, either on her own or on Renji's behalf. It's usually pretty rude to come up to a person and ask for their help in crafting a convincing fib. Hinamori knows Renji well enough-- she knows Rukia well enough now-- to expect that it would be taken as a compliment. But maybe not.

Rukia huffs. "You're right," she grumbles. "He's always been like that." She sighs expansively. "But if he were capable of running a team grift on his own, we never would have met, so I suppose I can't complain." And without any further preamble, she launces into a dissertation on the theory and practice of lying.

Hinamori blinks as she tries to take it in. There are fundamental precepts. There are classic techniques. There is ontology. There are hand-movements and eyebrow wagging. Hinamori should have brought a notebook, not that she could manage to get it all down. A lot of what Rukia says sounds like something Renji would say, but with far more conviction. He always used to say that he learned most of his chicanery from Rukia, and for the first time, Hinamori starts to believe it.

Rukia stops abruptly in the middle of an illustrative anecdote that has something to do with Kurosaki Ichigo's gym teacher. "What, exactly is the falsehood you need to fabricate?"

Hinamori tells her.

Rukia squirms for a moment. Momo realizes that she doesn't know if Rukia was asked to testify at any inquiries regarding her own captain. She wonders if she should have asked Renji after all.

"Look," says Rukia, in a way that is somehow simultaneously gruff and delicate, "Hinamori." She clears her throat. "I know it's extra weird because he's the Captain-Commander now, but you can just lie to Captain Kyouraku. It doesn't have to be convincing. He will ask you the question and you can say what you need to say and he'll write it in the official report. Whether or not he believes you is unimportant. He wants you to lie."

"I know," says Hinamori. "But I don't want it to just be a nod and a wink. Captain Komamura wouldn't have liked that. He was a good captain and a kind soul. Iba told me that he often tried to help people save face. I want to do a good job on my lie, for him. For Iba, too."

Rukia's brows furrow. She sets her jaw. "Your heart is very big, Hinamori," she says. "There are special techniques for lying with your entire heart. I will teach them to you."

"Thank you, Kuchiki-san," says Hinamori.

---

"Shortly after I became his lieutenant," Iba says, facing forward, standing at his fullest height, "my captain informed me that, in the case of his death, he had arranged a special exemption from the standard funeral rites for Gotei captains. He said that, if it was within my power, I should make sure his body was returned to his people."

"That is correct," the Head-Captain agrees. "Werewolves have a different path through the resurrection cycle than we do."

It takes Iba a moment before he is able to continue, but when he does, his voice is steady. He speaks in the cadence of a Lieutenant Delivering a Report. They can all do it. They all do do it. Momo does not remember anyone ever teaching her how. It just comes with the job. Iba's voice is naturally a little froggy, which Momo has noticed before, but it's even more evident when he is forgoing his usual tough guy turns of phrase.

Iba describes the damage sustained by his captain's bankai during the battle with Sternritter E. He makes a remark for the record about the unique relationship between Captain Komamura and his bankai. In this case, Iba says, the damage was more than Komamura could heal, would ever be able to heal. Iba states that by dismissing his bankai, Captain Komamura was able to eke out a few more hours of his life, but that his end was inevitable. This is why Iba and his captain did not regroup with everyone else, and why they declined medical assistance. Iba fought Soldat with his captain until the bitter, bloody end. At that time, zombies had begun to appear on the battlefield, and Iba felt it vital to deliver the body of his captain to the werewolf clan as soon as possible, so that it did not fall into enemy hands. That is why there is no corpse. "But my captain died honorably, in battle," Iba concludes. "I was there when he fell."

It takes some time for Head-Captain Kyouraku to finish up his note-taking. Lieutenant Ise is faster at transcription, Momo thinks, but she is not here. There is so much to do these days. She must be busy with something else.

Kyouraku's eyes scan quickly over his notes. "Thank you, Lieutenant Iba," he says. "Very complete. I don't think I have any further questions."

"If you think of anything later, please don't hesitate to ask, sir," Iba replies.

Kyouraku turns his gaze to Momo. "I understand you are able to corroborate portions of this, Lieutenant Hinamori?"

Momo straightens her spine and clears her throat.

You are telling a story, Rukia reminds her. Parts of that story are true and parts of it are not. Start with the parts that are true.

Hinamori tells the story of fighting her way through the Soldat-flooded city, trying to rejoin her captain. It is their practice to maintain distance when he is using his zanpakutou, but she likes to be within shouting distance. In case he needs her. She talks about seeing the columns of light and feeling the burst of strange, acidic reiatsu as the Quincy unleashed their Voll Stern Dich. She does not mention the way her feet were already moving even before she felt her captain's reiatsu plummet.

One of the things that makes you a bad storyteller, Hinamori, is that you always needs to add in extra detail, even when it doesn't add to the story, even when it makes you not look great. Especially when it makes you not look great. It's like you're always afraid of people thinking you are lying, so you want to lay everything out there up front.

This is still the part that is true, and Rukia said it was important to build up some momentum, so Himamori allows herself the indulgence of being a bad storyteller. If I tell the true parts poorly, she reasons, the lies will be less obvious.

"When Captain Hirako was injured, I made a poor decision. I wanted to save my captain. I thought I could get the drop on Sternritter E. I thought I could fight her fire with mine." Hinamori swallows. "Captain Komamura saved me. I know he wanted to go on and fight Yhwach, but he stayed back to protect me and my captain. I know it's not really relevant to this inquiry, but I would like it added to record anyway, if possible."

"Captain Komamura was always looking out for others on the battlefield," Head-Captain Kyouraku murmurs as his brush makes soft swishing noises over the paper. "I've made a note. Please continue, Lieutenant."

It's not a lie to not say something. It's just editing. Hinamori had wanted to tell Kuchiki the thing, the thing she had to edit out, but Kuchiki didn't want to hear it. Kuchiki had, in fact, put her hands over her ears and sang "LA LA LA LAAAA" until Hinamori gave up. It had been a little bit rude, in Hinamori's opinion. You want to tell me because it feels like a secret, Kuchiki had scolded. It's not a secret. It's extraneous information. Throw it in the trash. Burn it to a crisp. Forget about it forever.

It sure feels like a secret, the thing she had seen. She tries not to think about it, afraid that if she does, it will leave a hole in her story the size of a werewolf and the shape of a man. Instead, Hinamori continues. "Captain Komamura ordered me to take Captain Hirako and leave. I wanted to stay. I wanted to help. But I had seen her explosions, and I knew he needed the space. He went to bankai as I left."

"You didn't actually see them fight, then," Head-Captain Kyouraku surmises.

"Captain Komamura's bankai is--was--very large," Hinamori states the obvious. "As I left, I could see it taking explosion after explosion. I could hear and feel the bombs. They were deafening. I shouldn't have, but when they stopped, I… I looked back. I saw Captain Komamura's bankai crumble to pieces. It did not seem like a thing that would be possible to survive."

"Indeed," agrees the Head-Captain. "A great loss for the Gotei."

"Agreed, sir."

Iba draws in a long breath, but says nothing.

"Anything else, Lieutenant Hinamori?"

"No, sir. That is all."

"Captain Hirako has declined to give testimony. He said he didn't think he had anything to add."

"Probably not, sir. He was unconscious for most of it."

Kyouraku nods as he finishes writing. He puts his brush in the holder, and folds his hands. "Thank you both. I'm sorry we had to go through all this procedure for something so simple as a death in battle, but he was a captain, after all. Usually, the Central 46 would hold a hearing, but I think this--" he pats his stack of paper-- "should suffice."

She has done it. It's over. Kuchiki was right. It was barely a lie. It was a careful arrangement of true things. Hinamori feels like she has run a thousand miles and bench-pressed the Soukyoku. She wants to throw up. She wants to go to sleep for a million years.

"It was an honor to serve under him," Iba says.

Hinamori has no regrets.

---

Okay, it turns out that Hinamori does have regrets. Not about the statement. She receives a short note from the Captain Commander several days later informing her that the ruling of "Killed in Action" has been accepted, and thanking her again.

She wishes she had said more to Iba.

Hinamori is very busy these days. There have been three wartime actions in the last two years, and for once, Hinamori has come through relatively unscathed. She wants to make the most of this by helping everyone she can. She and Captain Hirako take on paperwork from the Tenth while its leadership needs extra treatment to purge out the last after-effects of the zombification. It's only fair. Hitsugaya has done enough of the Fifth's paperwork. She goes to PT with her Third Seat, who ended the war with a pair of prosthetic legs. She volunteers once a week at the Pop-Up Mess Hall the Ninth has been running to help out the squads whose facilities were destroyed, or who simply can't spare the manpower (also, the Ninth has a lot of talented cooks, and it's as good an opportunity to socialize as you can get these days). She tries to make time for all her friends, but especially the ones who are injured or grieving or overworked.

Hinamori is friendly with Iba, but she's not sure they are friends. He's not quite part of the close-knit core of the lieutenants that she hangs out with. He has his own friends, she's sure. He's pals with Abarai (who isn't?) and Madarame, who finally showed up to a lieutenant's meeting this week, even if he did so with a facial expression like he'd just drank a glass of slugs. Hinamori just isn't sure…well, it's not that those guys aren't sensitive to each other's feelings--scratch that, Madarame is definitely not sensitive to people's feelings--but Hinamori can't help but wondering if anyone has extended Iba any sympathy that didn't come the form of a moment of manly, stoic shared silence or possibly a punch on the shoulder.

Hinamori intends to swing by the Seventh shortly before the end of the work day. She isn't sure how this is going to go, and she wants to leave her options open. Her plans are derailed slightly when, on her way out of the door, she runs into Ise with a pile of new forms and feeling chatty to boot. By the time Hinamori walks into the Seventh's administrative building, it is half an hour past quitting time. The hallways are already pretty empty, and even as she knocks on Iba's door, Hinamori resigns herself to trying again tomorrow. "Lieutenant Iba?" she calls tentatively. "It's Lieutenant Hinamori. Are you in?"

"Ah, yes! Come in!" Iba's gravelly voice calls back.

Hinamori slides the door open and steps through. Iba is hunched over some paperwork. "Sorry!" he says. "Just a moment! I'm trying to finish up--there!" He looks up. "What can I do for you, Lieutenant Hinamori?"

For a long, long moment, Hinamori stares at him.

Iba has brown eyes. He blinks them once, then suddenly scrabbles around on his desk, shoves over a pile of forms that looks suspiciously like the one Ise just foisted on her, grabs his sunglasses, and crams them on his face. "Sorry!" he croaks. "Sorry!"

"No, no!" Hinamori waves a hand frantically. "It was my fault! I didn't-- I didn't see anything!" Her stomach clenches. Why is she always seeing things she isn't supposed to see? She looks away, frantically, and her eyes land on the floor next to Iba's desk. There is a pillow there, and on the pillow, a handsome dog regards her judgmentally. "Oh!" she says. "Hello, Goro!"

Iba clears his throat. "He's, uh. I don't keep him in here all day. He just had his dinner, and I'm going to take him for his walk as soon as I…" He looks at his stack of papers and then looks at Hinamori. "I'm sorry, what did you need? Are those more new forms?"

Goro puts his chin on his paws and sighs.

Hinamori looks down at the pile of paper nestled in the crook of her arm. "This?" she says, trying to get her thoughts together. "Oh! Right! No, no new forms! I got some flyers printed up for my weekly meditation circle! Do you remember, I mentioned it at the last lieutenants' meeting?"

"Oh…oh, yeah," Iba manages. "Yeah, that's not really my…"

"For your squad," Hinamori emphasizes. "I was hoping you might be able to post them in a common area. Or you could hand them out to anyone in particular you thought might benefit. Everyone's working so hard and dealing with so much right now. It can be, well, sort of a subtle way to suggest that someone takes a little break. I got a little stipend from the Fourth, so we have snacks afterward, now!"

Iba nods. He obviously does not need even one more thing to think about. "Ah, okay! Yeah, great idea! Thanks, Lieutenant Hinamori."

Hinamori slides the stack of flyers onto an extra table that Iba has pulled up next to his desk, apparently for increasing its paperwork-holding capacity. "You can have someone deal with these tomorrow," she says gently. She kneels down to scratch Goro's head. "Are you doing all right, Iba-san?"

Iba misinterprets her and immediately begins to bluster. "All of this looks much worse than it is! I'm getting the important stuff done! Ask anyone in Squad Seven--who have been champs, by the way! You see how empty this place is? It's because I make everyone go home on time, that's why! They'd be working night and day if I didn't make them take a rest. Maybe I'll send the whole lot over to your meditation whatsit!"

"That's not what I meant," Hinamori cuts him off. Unlike the Head-Captain's office, this is a place where she doesn't need to be parsimonious with the truth, so she goes on to say, "I only brought those flyers over as an excuse to come see how you were doing. You must miss him so much, and you can't even talk to anyone about the way it really happened."

Iba's mouth opens as he starts to say something, but then he closes it again. "I do," he says finally. He jerks his head towards an extra chair sitting along one wall. "You wanna pull up a seat?"

Hinamori does so. "Have you…heard anything?" She knows that Captain Komamura is still alive because Iba told her when he came to ask her to testify at the hearing. When he came to ask her if she would help him tell the story the way Captain Komamura would prefer it to be told. All the same, she is wants to let Iba be the one to say it out loud first.

"Ah, one of his relatives is a regular at the weekly market outside the eastern gate. There was a letter." Iba is silent for a moment. "He's healed up from his war wounds. He says there are some faces he's glad to see again." Iba reaches down to scratch Goro around the ears. "The cousin, he sells mushrooms, actually, really good mushrooms, I guess they sniff them out of the woods or something. Anyway, he says that, ah, well… they're happy to have him home."

Hinamori feels sadness settle on her chest like a stone. She barely knew Captain Komamura at all, but she knows he must have overcome so much in order to join the Gotei, in order to live in the city. She loves Junrinan, and yet she remembers feeling the cold terror that she might be sent back there after…when it seemed unclear whether she could still be a shinigami. "I'm sure it will be an adjustment," she says slowly. She wishes she could think of something else to say.

Iba regards her for a long time. "You get it," he says. "I can tell." He groans and leans back in his chair. "Aaah, Hinamori, you're right! It's been agonizing not bein' about to say anything! Everyone thinks I'm sad 'cause he's dead, and I gotta pretend that's true, but I'm actually sad 'cause all I can think about is his wolf-mom given' him a bunch of grief about wastin' his time on shinigami shit!"

"Does he have a wolf-mom?" HInamori asks, suddenly curious.

"Hell if I know! He never talked about werewolf stuff, so I've just been coming up with stuff in my head. I'm sure it's all wrong."

"I feel like if he has a wolf-mother, he would love her very much," Hinamori said. "He seemed like that type."

"You're right, Lieutenant Hinamori," Iba said, wagging a finger at her. "You're absolutely right." He cleared his throat. "While you're here. Listenin'. Well--there's something I been wanting to say so bad I feel like I'm gonna explode sometimes. You, ah, don't mind, do you?

"Of course not," Hinamori agrees. "Go ahead."

Iba leans forward, crumpling some of his paperwork. One side of his mouth curls up into a boyish grin. Goro looks up, curious. "He was awesome, there at the end, wasn't he?"

"Oh," says Hinamori, "oh, my, yes."

"For the length of that fight, he was immortal. Untouchable."

"I will never forget how I felt when I saw his bankai," Hinamori blurts out. "It gave me shivers."

"I know! It was absolutely incredible. I've--I've been working on my own bankai and I just…it's never going to be that."

Hinamori tilts her head to one side. "It might be," she says.

Iba frowns thoughtfully. "He gave me something to shoot for, for sure. What a captain he was!"

"Mm," Hinamori nods, thinking about captains she has loved.

Iba looks away for a moment, then looks back. "Hinamori, I gotta ask. You saw my captain. In his human form."

Hinamori is momentarily shocked to hear the secret thing, said out loud and in such a casual way. "Yes," she says eagerly.

"He was…he was, like, better than average on the looks scale, right? I'm not…I'm into ladies, you know, I'm not much of a judge of that kind stuff. But, like. Wow."

"Oh, yes," Hinamori, who is generally very circumspect when offering opinions on other people's look. "He was--well, that's not really my type either but--" She clears her throat primly. "Whew!"

"Whew!" Iba agrees.

Goro whines and puts his paws over his nose. Iba laughs, the kind of big hearty one that comes from getting something off your chest. "I know I've already taken up too much of your time, Hinamori, but, uh…I don't spose you'd like to help me take this guy on his walk?"

Hinamori smiles. "I'd love that."

[blorbocedes]

Wait I've never heard you talk about valtteri. I want to hear everything you think about him as a person, as a nature free guy, in the brocedes aftermath and maybe as a driver

I love that you've been keeping track?? 😭 I'm wondering if you're like a valtteri stan...... do people care what I think about drivers ahaha

It's true I don't talk about him much but I actually like valtteri a lot. so here's my bottas 🍑 thoughts

replacing a World Champion in 2016 is no easy feat, especially constantly being measured up against lewis. he came into Merc as a young(er than lewis -- in his mid twenties) driver in a championship winning car, obviously he was gonna have WC hopes, esp when Nico already achieved it. Look at Max, he wasn't even a WC but the best driver in his team and he ran through at least 3 teammates who couldn't measure up to him and their own dreams at becoming wc in the same car -- until they landed on Checo, who understands his role as second driver well and after a decade in f1 he's just grateful for the seat in the best car.

There's a reason HAM BOT VET/VER was a meme for Years and that speaks to Valtteri's consistency aa a driver. i think bc merc saw what happened with Nico and Lewis, they decided no more team fighting and we get the 'hi valtteri it's james' team orders here's a 3 minute compilation of it happening and you can hear James going 'I'm sorry' which is truly... you can't help but feel for it. But Valtteri was nothing but a team player and collected his second place in the WDC

ppl assume ah he's Finnish so he must be cold but that's not true, I personally find him very warm and tends to his own business. I think my favourite reaction of his was after the GR collision where GR came to flip him off (George's only interesting moment when his mask slipped) and Valtteri on DTS going, I thought he was going to check if I was alright (smile) -- like he saw George's cunt era!!! we get it

There's also a lot of racers who don't have hobbies outside of racing, but Valtteri seems so much more rounded as a person? i love that he loves Proper coffee even tho lewis wouldn't touch it... his bucket hats, he goes hiking with his cycling gf, he even won!! a cycling event during summer break and he supports her in her hobbies/career. here's him being a wag. he also has the opposite vibes of lando norris, aka he looks like he knows how to eat pussy. just has the vibes of a good lay.

If anything, posting a tasteful ass nude and then giving it framed to lewis is iconic??? love the Scandinavian lack of shame, and that his DTS scenes are ass out him on a sauna. highly respect.

One underrated thing I really like his relationship with Zhou Guanyu. older experienced teammate - younger junior with everything to prove can always be tricky; you can get anywhere from raging competition to complete indifference but it really does seem like ZG likes him, looks at him like a mentor and that's sick <3

MasterEyebrow had a LOT to do with my opinion on Valtteri, they changed it from who? to that guy :) ! and if you know, you know

Tldr: Valtteri seems like a cool dude, is driving his little heart out in that Alfa Romeo and is cool with posting nudes on main. Top notch.

Also he should never ever shave that beard does excellency for him

[thelocalmuffin]

ginasusahao for 14 if you please :0

Oh that's an underrated ship! Susato has two hands, let's goo. Prompt 19-Casual. To be honest, I don't know what casual quite means, but I ended up just writing a small fic.

Mild DGS2 spoilers. Also, once again, I used Haori's original name.

Fic summary: Haori and Gina meet for the first time. About 600 words.

“I really can’t wait to meet Miss Lestrade!” Haori excitedly chatters away as they walk down London’s streets. “She really seems like a bright lady. Maybe not conventionally, but I must confess street smarts are something I’ve always found appealing.”

“I’m glad you can’t. She’s quite lovely.” Susato smiles.

When she had told her girlfriend in a letter while she was in London that she had grown feelings for someone else, but had not lost feelings for Haori, she was expecting her to lash out and leave. Which would have been reasonable, but instead, she had been curious of what she had meant.

A very long story short, after a lengthy discussion, it was determined that Susato is polyamorous. Haori thought it was interesting and appreciated the honesty and gave her blessing, not showing any sort of jealousy.

When Susato confessed her feelings to Gina, she was also transparent with her and she was perfectly open with the idea, too.

Today, both of Susato’s girlfriends are going to meet for the first time, and she’s a bit nervous. She hopes the two get along well, but as they sit down at the restaurant where they agreed to meet, her nerves have not settled.

Not for her own sake, but she would really like it if her partners both got along. 

“Oi!” Gina calls out. Toby rushes over to Susato, wagging his little tail in excitement, barking as he jumps on her leg, begging for pets. Susato can’t refuse and scratches his little head.

Gina comes over and kisses Susato on the cheek. She flushes red as she sits down. Haori hasn’t said anything. Susato glances over, hoping everything is alright, but she’s beet red, looking away and covering her face with her kimono.

“O-oh, when Susato-san said you were beautiful, I didn’t think you were stunning.” Haori whispers. "I can't believe how breathtaking you are."

Gina’s the one bright red now, stunned at the compliment. She composes herself when Toby gets back on her lap, offering kisses.

“Fanks. That’s real nice o’ ya!” Her face brightens to a smile, petting Toby. “She usually this flustered?”

“Only around her crushes.” Susato teases.

Gina bursts out laughing. “Oof, just throwin’ her in the flames like that?”

“I’m afraid I must. Otherwise, she won’t say anything. My apologies, Haori.”

“It’s okay.” Haori sighs, moving her hand with a quick bow. “I’m sorry if I came off strong, but I was not expected to be smitten. My apologies if I made you uncomfortable.”

“Nah, nah at all!” Gina laughs, “Well, shall we order? I’m starvin’!”

*

When Gina says goodbye, she kisses Susato again, this time on the lips and rather passionately. She decides to give Haori a quick hug, leaving a goodbye cheek peck before pulling away. She waves, patting her leg to get Toby’s attention.

“Oh wow,” Haori blushes again, waving at Gina.

“So you have a type, yes?” Susato teases. Gina’s always dressed a bit unconventionally, and leans more into masculine tastes such as jeans and button up shirts. She should have guessed she would have liked Gina almost instantly.

Haori nods. “Yes, I think I do…you’re not mad, right?”

“No, of course not. You’re overthinking it. I’ll make sure to give you some private time to talk when we meet up next.”

“That would be lovely. Thank you, Susato.” Haori beams, wrapping her arms around her waist, kissing her partner without any hesitation. “I truly appreciate it.”

**

Hey, so I need a few more requests to make it through the rest of the challenge! If you'd like something, please feel free to read the prompt list and send me an ask!

[pepsivomit]

HEAR YE, HEAR YE!

Ahoy feller scurvy wags, 

You gay? You a pirate? Like fuckin’ operas? and angst?

I assume you’re all ofmd fans so uhh you’re atleast one of those. But anyway. This talented musician, Billy Cobb, i’ve been listening to his music on Youtube for awhile now, made a severely underrated wholeass gay pirate opera MASTERPIECE with only 46k views (can’t believe it), Johnny and Joel are my first beloved gay pirates. I danced, i also cried. Sobbed to the bop even.  And it has been one of my favourite goddamn sea-shanty albums ever since. It’s truly a hidden treasure so PLEASE. Give it the attention it clearly deserves. 

S.S KRILL BY BILLY COBB:

https://youtu.be/KCVbhhAUd-Y

Trust me, it’s not just an album. It’s a fucking experience. Enjoy the sail and spread the message in a bottle, of course.

[sit-communist]

I don't normally post but this is for @discoveringenterprise

A/N:

Can a Captain date an Ensign? Why not?

Does the ship have a garden? It does now!

ArcherxRyan

You were laying on your bed, filling out reports on your padd. Your shift had ended over an hour but you were feeling lazy and hadn't even showered yet. You were considering getting up and doing so when you heard a knock at the door.

For a second all you did was stare blankly at the door. -no one ever came to see you- But you snapped yourself out of it, set your padd down on the bed and stood. You looked down at your wrinkled uniform and smoothed it out ineffectively while saying "Come in".

The doors swooshed open and there stood Jonathan Archer, Captain of the Enterprise. Your crush.

"Ensign Ryan" he started, looking down at the padd in his hand as he took a step inside. "I see here you work in engineering, but I don't think I've ever seen you down there" he looked up at you with his eyebrows squished together questioningly.

"Um, I'm usually scrubbing out a plasma conduit" you responded quickly and redirected your gaze at the floor. You couldn't believe he was in your quarters.

"I see" his gaze was pointed at you, then the floor where you were looking, then back at you. He raised one eyebrow and said, "is everything ok Ensign?"

You cleared your throat. "Yes sir" you said as formally as you could. Then you lifted your head to look at him, adding in a in a softer voice, "am I in trouble or something?"

A warm smile spread across his face, as he shook his head "No Ryan, you're not in trouble" he chuckled. "I heard you had a dog" he explained.

Your shoulders relaxed and you couldn't help but return his breath taking smile with a small one of your own. "Yes sir, I do" you said.

His smile that had faded but never truly gone away was back in full force now. "What would you say to a date?"

Your face flushed. "Sir?"

"A play date, between your dog and mine?" He said, clueless to the fact that your heart was beating at warp 2.

"Oh, right. Sure!" You swallowed your drool and blinked a few times to bring yourself back to reality. "When and where?" You asked cheerfully, then added "sir" when he didn't respond within .005 seconds.

"Are you free now? I can go get Porthos and meet you in the garden" he pointed down the corridor towards the greenhouse section. "Unless you want to go somewhere else?" His smile wasn't fading at all now.

"Yes, Captain. I will get Daisy and her things ready. I will report to the garden in 15 minutes sir", you automatically came to attention at the last word.

He cocked his head to one side. "This isn't an order, Ensign. At ease" When you loosened up again he added "You are not to 'report' anywhere, but I do hope I see you and Daisy in the garden this evening" and with those words he turned and left.

You smiled widely at the thought of spending time with the handsome man but your smile faded and your eyes widened as you started to worry about what you could possibly talk to him about.

You walk over to the mirror and run a brush through your blonde hair. -I am the girl who cleans up the mess after the guys 'fix' the engine. I am a nobody. He's the freakin captain!- Your thoughts continue like this as you pull off you uniform shirt and starfleet issue undershirt to replace them with a light blue tank top.

After gathering her treats and her ball, you scoop up the little Jack Russel Terrier in your arms and head out the door.

You take a deep breath before you open the doors to the garden. You look around but you don't see the Captain, maybe he hasn't arrived yet. Daisy squirms so you set her down and she runs in circles around you, making you giggle.

You toss her ball towards the large grassy area and follow her over. She's quick and you have to throw her ball again before you even get there, and once more before you can sit down on the only bench.

Daisy was bringing the ball back to you for the third time when you heard the swoosh of the doors. Daisy heard it too and ran to sniff the other dog. You kept your eyes on the two dogs, Daisy had been attacked by a large dog last year and you were still anxious about her meeting new dogs, but Porthos seemed to be a perfect gentleman.

Once you were reassured that Daisy was safe with Porthos, you turned my attention back to the Captain. He had made his way over to the grassy area and had stopped a few feet from the bench.

He put his hands in his pockets and looked around. "We're the only ones here, huh?" He chuckled. "This place is underrated, the flowers are beautiful! And this is the only place on the ship that the air smells fresh", he took a deep breath, smiling as he exhaled loudly.

-Flowers, ok flowers. You know flowers. You can talk about flowers- "That is a Lord Baltimore hibiscus" You pointed to the tall plant with big red flowers to the right of the bench you were sitting on. "It was named after a 17th century Earth governor, who was only 5 years old when he became Baron" He wasn't responding but he was watching you intently so you continued.

"And the purple one next to it is called a ipomoea nil, more commonly referred to as a morning glory" you paused, you could name all of the plants but you doubted he wanted to listen to you. You shook your head, "I'm sorry you came here for our dogs to play not to hear me ramble about flowers" you said.

He looked at Porthos and Daisy, who were chasing each other playfully. "I think our dogs are ok" he said as he turned back to you. He paused and opened his mouth like he was thinking about saying something. But he simply closed it again and walked towards you.

In fact, he walked past you. He approached the bush with tiny bright yellow flowers on the other side of the bench and bent over to smell it, closing his eyes as he did.

"What's this one called?" He asked when he had stood up straight again. He looked at you with bright eyes, and you couldn't help but smile. "That one is a Japanese rose bush, it is not a true rose, but it is beautiful" You brushed you hair behind your ear and kept your gaze on the plant.

You heard Daisy bark and you whipped around, barely catching the sight of Porthos running out the door with Daisys ball in his mouth, scurrying past a startled Dr. Phlox and down the hallway.

"Porthos! Get back here!" Archer called as he rushed past you and out the door. Daisy walked sulkily towards you and sat at your feet, looking at you sadly. "It's ok girl, we'll get it back" You say, smiling. She wags her tail once in response.

Daisy stood up again and went to sniff Dr. Phlox as he was walking over. The doctor smiled at the dog before looking at you, "May I?" He asked as he gestured towards Daisy. "Of course!" You started, "Your animal collection is legendary though, I'm sure you've seen your share of dogs."

He bent down and scratched Daisy behind her left ear, her favorite spot. "I have seen many dogs, but never a Jack Russel" he replied, nuzzling noses with Daisy before standing up again and walking off towards the insect habitats. "Thank you Ensign, that was a valuable experience!" He called over his shoulder.

You called Daisy over and scooped her up, petting her softly for a moment before standing up and walking calmly in the same direction Porthos and Archer went.

Ten minutes and three pointing crewmen later, you found Archer trying to convince Porthos to come out from behind some crates in engineering storage room c.

Archer was clicking his tongue and saying "come on boy" over and over but Porthos knew if he came out he'd have to give up the ball.

"Captain" you started. His head jerked around, his right hand going to his side where his phaser would be, but he immediately relaxed.

You shifted the unhappy Daisy in your arms and jammed your hand into your pocket to pull out the small bag of treats you had brought. "Would one of these help?" You asked with both eyebrows raised, gesturing the bag in his direction.

He smiled a small forced smile accompanied by a slight scowl. He clearly didn't like the idea of accepting help. He shrugged and flatly said "Sure", reaching out a hand with his palm up.

You pulled out two of the small bone shaped treats and placed them in the Captains hand. Your fingertips grazed the edge of his palm and you felt goosebumps up your arms, then a chill down your back. Your toes curled inward and your breath hitched.

Somehow you maintained your composure as you withdrew your hand and took a step back. "Thank you" Archer said with a much more genuine tone than he had spoken with a moment ago, though he still wore the scowl.

He turned back to coaxing Porthos out, but he didn't have to try very hard now. The beagle was already sticking his nose around the corner of the crate nearest the wall. The Captain held the treat out and Porthos trotted happily around the corner, head held high.

Archers scowl melted and he smiled widely at the dog. The Captain took both of Porthos' floppy ears into his hands and kissed him on the forehead. Then, he dropped the second treat on the floor to keep the dogs attention as he bent over the crate to reach the ball that still laid behind it.

He handed you the ball. "Sorry about that" he said, "Porthos doesn't normally do that, I promise!"

You shifted Daisy again who was now getting heavy. She licked your cheek once and whined. "It's not a big deal Captain, really" you responded as you took the ball from him.

Daisy whines again and you set her down as Porthos comes over to apologize. You hold the ball behind your back as you watch the two canines interact.

The Captain isn't looking at the dogs, he's looking at you. "My name is Jon" he says after a short silence.

"I know" you blurted out.

Your face got hot real quick and you opened your mouth as you tried to think of something to say to recover from that. "I just mean that you're the Captain, everyone knows your name"

"And I just meant that you can call me Jon." He grinned lopsidedly as he took a step in your direction.

Your heart rate was back at warp speed as he took another step, effectively closing the gap between you. He cocked his head and brought his hand up, brushing your cheek with the back of his fingers.

Your eyes were glued to his. "Ryan?" He asked quietly. "Cap-" you stopped yourself, "Jon?" He smiled when you said his name. "Request permission to kiss you"

You knew no one else was there but you still looked around to make sure he was talking to you. Heart rate was at warp 5 now. "Permission granted" you tried to speak normally but it came out as barely more than a whisper.

He lifted your chin and it seemed to take a year for him to lean in. When his lips finally touched yours it sparked something in you. This must be what warp 10 feels like. You threw your arms around his neck, pulling him closer. His arms came around your waist, his hands ever so slowly moving their way up each side of your back.

Porthos barked and you two reluctantly separated. You had dropped the ball, and Daisy had grabbed it and jumped on top of a crate that was too high for Porthos to jump on.

Jon chuckled "Seems like Daisy won this round" he said to the dog. His hands were still on your hips. Your hands had fallen to his arms, your fingers wrapped around the back of his arm just above the elbow.

You shuffled nervously and it brought his gaze back on you. "Ryan, what would you say to a date?" There was that lopsided grin again. "This time, you and me?"

[ramajmedia]

10 Things In Fantasy Movies You Didn’t Know Were CGI

Even though most of us will have a hard time believing it or recalling it, there was a time when CGI really wasn't a thing. It's not like that stopped directors and producers from making high-quality films. However, when it comes down to fantasy movies, it sure does help to have some besides puppets, strings, and your imagination.

Related: 10 Things In Historical Period Movies You Didn't Know Were CGI

When used poorly, CGI can completely destroy a movie. It doesn't really matter how big of a budget you have, if you go overboard with the special effects, you can wave those stellar critics goodbye. But when used properly, CGI can come in handy to make some scenes even better than they already are. And how do you know if it was well used? Well, most of the time, if audiences don't notice it! Let's take a look at ten instances from fantasy movies where the use of CGI was seamless.

10 Shazam! - The Shopping Bags

Shazam! hit the screens pretty recently. With a mix of good and bad reviews, one thing is for certain - this movie speaks to all fourteen-year-olds out there who wish they had superpowers. It's a fairly entertaining movie and a fresh take on superheroes in a day and age where Marvel and DC are everywhere.

Overall, it didn't go too far with CGI besides the bare essentials. However, there was a particularly seamless instance when Shazam is fighting Dr.Sivana at the mall, and some shoppers appear in the scene. These were actual crew members shot accidentally, and shopping bags were added to make it seem intentional.

9 The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe - The Wolves' Tales

Obviously, the Chronicles of Narnia movies were swimming in CGI. It's pretty much impossible to find any of the creatures in this imaginary world roaming around the streets of our cities. These were pretty obvious scenes where digital effects were used, along with several scenic shots.

But when it came down to the wolves that destroyed the Beavers' homes in The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, although pretty much all of the animals were actual wolves, their tales were digitally inserted using CGI. This happened because the animals kept wagging their tales, making them look more like sweet puppies than vicious beasts.

8 E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial - The Walkie Talkies

E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial is one of those heart-warming classics that will live in our memories forever. The genius of director Steven Spielberg didn't keep him from introducing us to an extraterrestrial on a flying bike all the way back in 1982 when CGI was something still rough around the edges.

Related: Disney's 10 Most Creative Uses Of CGI, Ranked

But besides the most obvious things, there is a curious thing that was altered from the original recording using digital techniques. During the police standoff, the officers were originally pointing guns at the kids. But because this was considered quite a horrible practice, walkie-talkies were inserted instead - and incredibly seamlessly too!

7 Charlie And The Chocolate Factory - The Oompa Loompas

While the original motion picture of Charlie And The Chocolate Factory was the one that gifted us a meme that will probably last forever, Tim Burton's more wonky and colorful version also has its merits. Aside from the stellar performance, Johnny Depp gave us as Charlie, the movie also gave us the weird little creatures called Oompa Loompas.

Curiously enough, every single one of the Oompa Loompas was played by the same actor, and CGI was used to replicate him. Even though special effects were used, each Oompa Loompa consists of a different performance by Deep Roy. A great example of acting and CGI working together!

6 Harry Potter And The Sorcerer's Stone - The Great Hall Candles

Look, as much as we wish magic wands and flying cars were actually a thing, they simply aren't. At least not for now, or at least not in a universe we're familiar with. Describing all the things that were CGI in the Harry Potter movie franchise could fill a couple of textbooks, so we'll focus on the more subtle details.

Related: 10 Things In Sci-Fi Movies You Didn't Know Were CGI

In the first installment of the series, after experimentation went wrong, it was decided that the floating candles had to be done using CGI. This happened because the initial attempt of having actual candles hanging by wires almost resulted in a true disaster. The second best thing would probably be a spell, though, but we're okay with special effects!

5 Harry Potter And The Half-Blood Prince - The Pensive Liquid

Not much was ever truly jolly when it comes to the Harry Potter movies. We did get some laughs, mostly thanks to the awesome characters of Ron Weasley and Neville Longbottom, but something dark was always looming around. And the sixth installment of the series was when things started taking an even more dramatic turn to the worst.

The scenes where Dumbledore yanks his thoughts out of his head with a wand are somewhat uncomfortable, and we couldn't help but wonder what kind of mushy liquid was used to represent the liquid in the pensive. As it turns out, the whole thing was digitally inserted using CGI. Everybody chill, it wasn't snot after all.

4 Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows Part 1 - Godric's Hollow

Many iconic sets and views were used throughout the entire Harry Potter series, and many of them were actual places. Even though some pretty obvious alterations had to be made for the sake of magic, many landscapes retained their original characteristics without needing to be altered.

The place all fans know as Godric's Hollow is, in reality, the historic village of Lavenham, Suffolk. All the scenes that happen there didn't use any CGI, except for one - when Hermione and Harry are walking, the whole thing was created digitally. And very masterfully, we might add, since it was barely noticeable.

3 Bridge To Terabithia - Jess And Maybelle

Bridge To Terabithia explored the creative minds of children in the most poetic and beautiful way possible. Also, it awarded us with a pre-teen Josh Hutcherson, which is always a cute sight to behold. While the world created by the two main characters, Jess and Maybelle, is truly a sight to behold, it's safe to say that most of it couldn't be accomplished without special effects.

But the movie did feature an extremely smooth CGI move. When we see the huge panorama shot of this wonderful world that is Terabithia, we also see the two friends. However, none of the actors were actually present, and they were inserted using CGI instead, mostly for practicality purposes.

2 Cinderella - The Glass Slipper

Live-action Disney movies tend to be a hit or miss. As much as we all love the chance of seeing our childhood heroes being portrayed on-screen once more by actual actors, CGI can completely butcher characters (yes, we're looking at the Beast from Beauty And The Beast because, honestly, what was that?).

Related: 5 Disney Characters We Hope Never To See In CGI (And 5 That Can Make It Work)

Cinderella was actually a very good example of a Disney movie turned real. The special effects weren't overboard, and everything was pretty believable -  as far as fairy godmothers can be. Hats off to the special effects team for making the glass slipper fitting into Cinderella's foot completely CGI since, ironically enough, the original it didn't fit on Lily James' foot.

1 Pan's Labyrinth - The Faun's Non-Legs

When it comes to beautiful fantasy movies that also have the power to scar you for life, nothing can hold a candle to Spanish classic Pan's Labyrinth. It's eery, it's magical, and at times, outright fear-inducing. The movie gets a place on its list due to a very interesting use of CGI.

Instead of adding something, this time around we're talking about removing. See, the Faun's legs were actually a concoction from director Guillermo Del Toro that allowed the actor to control them, which is why the movements seem so seamless and natural. In post-production, CGI was used to remove the actor's legs and voilá - we got ourselves a Faun!

NEXT: 10 Most Underrated Sci-Fi/Fantasy Films Of The Last 20 Years

source https://screenrant.com/fantasy-movies-cgi/