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gffa · 1 month ago

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This is a long rant and I apologise if this comes off as too much 😅 I just want to let you know that I'm SO GLAD you're part of the star wars fandom. You're one of the few reasons my interest in this franchise has survived despite the toxicness that it has seeped into everything the past few years. Yes, star wars fandom has always been pretty much a mess but I feel like these days it's somehow gotten even worse. And there isn't even anything coming out that could distract everyone from the constant drama.

Your blog and your posts about the books are always a breath of fresh air in all this. I really appreciate that you take time to make all these long canon references and share them with us. And that you actually engage with canon content! For some reason that seems to be a tall order for most 'fans' these days.

It's exhausting seeing the ice cold takes about the jedi be repeated over and over again by people who seem to have barely even watched the films, let alone read the random book they're referencing to show how the jedi are So Evil and failed poor anakin by Forcing him to let go of his Attachments so they definitely deserved to all get massacred down to the last child!!! And if you push back by citing literally anything canonical to show how ridiculous their takes are they reference a random obscure legends novel (that they are often twisting and also usually haven't even read) And if you point out that, no, Legends isn't canon (and never has been) and we could discuss it as its own separate thing instead of dragging it into canon discussions, they completely flip and say they don't care and to stop taking star wars so seriously 🙄 ( u can probably tell I've had some pretty frustrating fandom arguments recently lol)

It does feel like groundhog day sometimes with the same arguments being repeated over and over again to villainize the jedi while absolving the genocidal mass enslaving space fascists that are Very Clearly the Bad Guys. And it feels pretty much deliberate at this point when people misunderstand star wars' canon definition of attachment and project all their issues in their own lives with their christian upbringing onto the space monks... This has only been exacerbated by people like Headland jumping onto the franchise and doing this with fuckass disney's approval, so now the racist anti jedi youtubers have started attacking this new anti jedi show so if I defend the jedi I get lumped in with them *sigh*

Anyway, I just listened to Padawan's Pride because of your posts and it was fun and a much needed palate cleanser for me after the months of anti jedi takes. I also started reading your jedi citations project and it's gotten me back into reading some other of my favorite jedi fics and maybe writing some of my own. So tldr; Thank You!

Oh, anon, I hear you and I went through a lot of similar feelings over the last few months. In between a lot of IRL stuff coming up and the fandom getting incredibly weird about Jedi fans (soooo much projection going on that it started getting unsettling sometimes) and the same old constant beratement on my posts, I was thinking that I was just too tired to deal with any of it.

It did get hard some days because it felt like no matter how hard I tried to be friendly and make a point to say that everyone needed to be allowed their space whether we agreed or not, that I would still get words put in my mouth or my posts misinterpreted or accused of trying to shut down other people's conversations, when I've never even interacted with that person, I've never reblogged anything from them, never talked about them, just made my own posts about the Jedi on my own blog.

That aspect of how, if we write posts that cite Lucas quotes or moments from the movies and shows, we're taking things too seriously (or the super weird one of how we're trying to "force" people to have to take Lucas' commentary as a holy grail or whatever), then we're taking it too seriously is SO REAL, I have been through that SO MUCH. And it's like, no! Nobody has to take authorial intention into consideration! But if you're going to say that I ~missed the point~ of what Lucas intended with the movies, I'm going to break out the Lucas quotes to show that, no, I didn't miss the point. You're still not obligated to agree, but the point is that I'm not coming out of nowhere with my views and deriding me as not a ~true fan~ or whatever is asshole behavior.

And it's hard to have that groundhogs day feeling, especially because you don't necessarily want to spend that time getting into arguments with people--they are allowed their own space, if they want it! But if they're coming into our space, then yes we get to respond with an essay if we like. (And, hey, some of us genuinely like writing essays, it's satisfying!) But I've found the best mindset for me to have when arguing is: I'm not going to convince this person in front of me and that's fine, they're not going to convince me, either. But there are other people watching this discussion and they are seeing which one of us is being a pill and which one of us looks kinda fun to hang out with.

Which is my way of winding around to what I really want to say--I'm so glad that I can help you want to have fun in this corner of fandom! There's always going to be times to respond with sharp edges to Jedi-critical stuff (especially when it starts dipping into the racist, xenophobic, bigoted nonsense)(not all of Jedi criticism is this, but it does happen all too often), I don't blame Jedi fans for having their nerves scraped raw by people feeling absolutely free to treat our posts like public property instead of them coming into someone else's lane to make a mess. (I've met some very nice Jedi critical people, this isn't about them, this is about the assholes.)

But is it really worth being in a fandom where that's all we do anymore? We can't avoid the negativity, we can't avoid people being assholes to us, but we can work on making the content we want to see at the end of a long day when we get home and log onto the computer and want to see something that makes us feel joyful.

I hope I'm doing my part to make it fun to stick around the fandom, to want to read some of the books or some of the fic, I love the artists who are drawing the cutest Jedi art, I love the fic writers who are writing great Jedi-positive stories, I love people who make silly shitposts about how funny the Jedi fan be, I love people who cry over the deaths of their favorite Jedi, they help make the fandom worthwhile.

It really does make a huge difference, I think! Whenever I need that same palette cleanser, I just take a week or so to push aside all discourse (don't even go look), just pick up some of my favorite Jedi fics, just go looking for some of my favorite Jedi art, reread "Padawan" or "Padawan's Pride" or "Obi-Wan & Anakin" or "The Living Force" or "Dark Rendezvous" and just spend time thinking about the things I love about the Jedi in canon, thinking up headcanons about lineages or nerdy Jedi philosophy arguments or adrenaline junkies, and it helps create the space I want to be in.

Hearing that I can help you with that is a huge boost as well--I hope you know that it helps me in return to know that we can help build something together here in our corner of the Star Wars internet. We're in this together and we can cheer each other up with cute content and I am getting out the pom-poms for you to have fun with that fic! <3

#lumi.txt #star wars

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lost-technology · 1 year ago

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You Can't Outrun Your Past, No Matter How Hard You Try...

So, I got a DM from someone looking for an old fanfic of mine - or, they didn't know if I was the author, but were looking up stuff from the old Live Journal days and found me somehow - managed to connect my regular pename to my account here - well, I do mention it on my pin-post. They were looking for a particular old fanfic and I was all "Okay, that sounds vaguely familiar" but I couldn't find it. I googled the title mentioned and... promptly had a thousand-yard stare. I used to get up to some seriously fucked up shit in my early Trigun fandom days in the early 2000's. So, I had one of those experiences that fell into the annals of "this is why I do not do co-writing." It took a bad experience in the She-Ra and the Princesses of Power fandom to finally solidify that, but I really should have learned back then. I have had more bad experiences co-writing than good ones (although there is a Zelda fic I do not regret co-creating and a pretty good Super Smash short I did with someone I'm still friends with). Anyway, I did this fic back in the day with someone whom I eventually had a huge falling out with and hope to never see hide nor hair of again in my entire life - and, if possible, I'd like to continue that relationship of no-contact into the afterlife, should one exist. The falling out wasn't over this fic we created together, it was over a variety of other things that happened later and I can admit that there were two assholes in the equation, not just one - I was just as much of an asshole as my former friend. Anyway, indeed, I am the co-author of some fic that... people still talk about, I guess? titled "Dark Mirror." As I remember it - being that I erased its presence from the Internet as much as I could and no longer retain files (if I ever kept any, they were several computers and virus-attacks / hard drive reworkings ago), it was a WEIRD fic. I remember it being a take on the "Dark Vash" toy repaint. It involved Vash going evil, but not of his own choice. He basically got Plant-rabies. He got a fungal disease that was slowly killing him and eating his brain. He also found a somehow Survived!The!Big!Fall! Rem (coldsleep pods, baby)! who reunited with him, tried to help him find the cure and they fell in adult-style love. BLECK!!! WHY?! YOUNG SHADSIE, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!!!! YOU WERE INSANE! (In my defense, I have figured out exactly what mental illness I had / have and have gotten medication and treatment, thank you). I also seem to recall that most of the idea - certainly the structure of the Plant-fungal disease (which was actually one of the cooler ideas in it) was courtesy of the person known as "MillyFan" (or as I'd like to call them today, the Motherfucker). I think Vash / Rem was their idea, too, but I can't be sure. It was entirely my fault for going along with it. Certain stupid cameos from other animes were my fault, I recall that. (I was trying to insert Haibane Renmei characters into the whole mess for some reason). I... feel like taking a shower now. I already took one today... Anyway, I have a lot more weirdness and "What was I thinking?!" stories that do actually still exist on my old fanfiction.net account if anyone is interested in those. I have one where Legato propositions Vash for sex in a dingy hotel (Vash runs away very quickly). I have one where a woman that Midvalley got pregnant confronts him and he preforms an abortion by saxophone. I have this one really annoying anti-Vashwood piece back when I was an annoying little shit about Vashwhood. I have one that I actually recently re-read in thinking I could transfer it to Ao3 that isn't so bad, but I was overdramatic and predictable about Vash getting a pet cat. (You know the cat is doomed from the start, right? Very "Does the Dog Die?" stuff. Blech). I really like to think that I have become... a much better writer than from my early days. Please stick to my Ao3 page to see anything that I think is actually halfway decent in this fandom.

#trigun #personal #my old trigun fanfiction #I am Shadsie #if you see old Trigun stuff under the username Shadsie it is me #unless there is another person by the same name I don't know about #I know that there is some author who goes by Shadsie in Harry Potter fandom from googling #that is NOT me #I was never into HP fandom #I was also LadyShadowcat #Shadowcat #and LushDesolation #I have apologized to both Vash and Rem for Dark Mirror #just in case they actually exist in another universe #or will exist in the future

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wirewitchviolet · 2 years ago

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The Entire Plot of Final Fantasy 14, with all the expansions, and some serious analysis of how good it actually is. (Part 10 - Post-Endwalker... mostly.)

Last time, we covered Endwalker, the most recent expansion as of when I’m writing all these, and genuinely serving as an ending to the story. To date, the plot irons we’ve hard in the fire are the threat posed by this evil empire which was very much going for a nazi thing, this mysterious council of evil weirdos whose motives were never really pinned down until the third expansion, and this whole tragic cycle of races not considered to be human summoning gods that just exacerbate tensions with their neighbors, and we genuinely did resolve all of that. We also got uh... let’s say kind of ambitious, and established that basically all life anywhere in the entire universe has been wiped out except for the people on your planet and a few stragglers showing up at the cafe we’re helping some unstoppable killing machines set up as a change of pace. And I don��t actually expect them to walk any of that back, except maybe the god summoning, because I’m pretty sure the current writing team did in fact get the memo that people MUCH prefer the later relatively light-hearted self-contained adventures to the grim political stuff.

Also last time I tried to embed this cutscene from halfway through the final boss fight and it wouldn’t let me and I need to stick it in here because seriously it is hilarious how they just sucked all the tension out of fighting the would-be destroyer of all life in the universe to throw in this random silly nonsense.

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I also didn’t really get a chance to share my closing thoughts on the expansion, which are of course that it’s kind of a huge mess? Tonally it is all over the map in a really jarring way. That’s largely true of the game as a whole, but usually there’s a much smoother ebb and flow to it. You build up to a big tense dramatic moment, leave to regroup somewhere, have some lighthearted encounters with the locals, and build back up. Then major side content between expansions is either all silly, or a raid that builds things up then releases the tension with some super sappy happy ending. Here though? Intrigue with NO payoff, then some hijinks, then torture and suicidal nazis, then a big action beat immediately giving way to cute little moon bunnes, then tender gay moments with the past selves of villains, then a really legitimately dark climax, and this jaw-droppingly comedic bit with Zenos here. Just what the hell? Plus you know the actual major threat that this big old apocalypse is really going to actually destroy the world and all its splintered off alternate dimensions simply holds no teeth, because we’re coming DIRECTLY on the heels of the expansion where you pull one of those back from the bring of destruction, and nobody in their right mind would retroactively make that some sick shaggy dog story. Also it doesn’t really make sense how it plays out. We built up this meteor shower imagery forever but then it’s literally just an ominous skybox and we’re actually dealing with some sort of psychic attack.

It’s also a weirdly comedic expansion on the whole. I don’t know if I really properly conveyed it but basically every major scene has someone kinda taking the piss out of the whole conversation by being too self-aware about things in one way or another, and like, I’d honestly say it all lands. Anyway, I can’t get into the entirety of the next between expansions interlude because as of time of writing only 60% of it has been released, and again, that’s 60% of each plotline going on, so nothing has a conclusion right now. But I said I’d cover what there was to cover so here we go.

After getting back from the far reaches of space we have no outstanding crises to deal with for the first time ever, and have some nice relaxed conversations with people. Mostly Krile and Tataru who respectively are responsible for the cutscene above to some degree, and uh... from where I sit the biggest remaining threat to the world? While everyone else was off saving all life in the universe, Tataru was just aggressively expanding her personal business dealings all over the world. She’s got this international trade network going, status as a fashion designer, her own personal airship, and she’s just rolling in cash to a point where she just gifts you your own private island.

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The island is it’s whole THING where you basically play like Stardew valley in your downtime and I haven’t really personally gotten into it as I have work I’m trying to get done. Everyone else is off doing their own thing in semi-retirement. The twins are still doing relief work in what’s left of the empire, Krile and G’raha just sort of went back to college, with her clearly having a thing for him and him still having this hopeless crush on you. Pretty sure Thancred and Urianger are just shacked up somewhere and hanging out with the moon rabbits, and Estinein is hanging out with Vrtra and damn right do I ship’em. Hanging out in the markets though, he finds out about this secret underwater treasure vault which is another of the things Emet-Selch shouted out as something to maybe check out when you get home, and the most recent apocalpyse mainly hitting Thavnair means there’s a lot of orphans and such who could use rebuilding money. Y’shtola comes along too because any weird unexplored secret area could be of some help in her current personal project, working out how to hop dimensions at will, both because it just seems cool to do, and because she misses the cat man she was shacked up with in the First.

So you head to the bottom of the ocean, fight some guardian constructs, reach a huge treasure vault, and it has both heaps of gold and some big ominous construct which turns out to have a small stable portal to the void inside. Oh and then Vrtra walks in and basically goes “hey guys, you’re uh.... not seriously breaking into my personal rainy day fund to rob me are you?” And uh, whoops? We also explains what’s up with the gate, and turns out that forever ago, during the backstory to that demons and air pirates raid after Heavensward, he had a big sister who charged straight on through a gate duing a big demon invasion to take the fight to their leader. I’m not really cool with us continuing to retroactively give Midgardsomnr more children we’d just never heard of so hopefully five is our final count? Anyway, he wanted to rescue her, which is the reason he made his weird little kid spy body to begin with, but figured it wasn’t worth the risk. Y’shtola is all about taking a field trip to hell, because hey, portals one can actually walk through open up to there all the time, and this was even a thing in the First with the offensive caster role quest. Vrtra has misgivings, being a responsible adult, but all you have to do is take those new warding scales we have all over to keep the protagonist from being the only one who can do most things, have Cid add some extra protective plating, research how to create an artificial version of a hell-mouth demon to absorb this stable portal and make it bigger, and in you go. Vrtra wants to come along personally and gets an upgraded version of his weird kid body that’s an adult with a worse voice actor because again, these days actually playing with other humans is strictly optional and you need a switch hitter tank/DPS to round things out. Oh and for some advanced scouting Y’shtola sends in some nixies she creates with a ritual she came up with when she was like 6 and is now deeply embarassed by.

Before we get into that though, we have some side quests to maybe deal with, and we are officially way overdue to check in on Hildibrand. After your last interaction where people got sucked through an interdimensional rift, Gilgamesh went off to do Gilgamesh things, and Hildy’s body got spit back out over in Thavnair somewhere, but he’s in a coma, so Nashu took him to a doctor. Doctors can’t fix souls being stuck in the First, which is clearly what’s happening here, so you just... rinse out that soul container you’re still carrying around and head off to grab him, and uh...

He’s fine, he just never ditched his ridiculous getup from the last time you saw him and has amnesia again. You apply the traditional cure of throwing big cartoon bombs at him and drag his soul home. There’s a bit of minor drama with Dr. Lugae’s sort of back from the dead form which ends with a big robot head in a jail cell, and then Hildy being kidnapped by a badly drawn alien in a crappy little UFO. You, Nashu and this conspiracy theorist crackpot you’re hanging out with head up to the moon to look at him, and find him... several times over. The little alien he met just kinda made a bunch of clones of him for fun. You deal with that, there’s more random shenanigans, his dad randomly shows up, as he’s wont to do, and messing around with the big stone face of mars type structure on the moon causes it’s mouth to open and this to happen.

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Apparently this was a big welcoming party thing they set up and nobody remembered to call it off when people didn’t end up needing to evacuate to the moon. Also Godbert’s here looking for meteors to combine with his own extra manly sweat as the base for this expansion’s obligatory set of ultimate weapons with a very involved side quest. Kind of him to share his terrifying power.

Meanwhile, there’s those twelve gods people theoretically worship that you’ve never had a chance to kill. That’s not right. The nerd squad and some random wandering bard type guy, along with another glasses wearing orc girl nerd end up investigating a mystery spot that takes you to a big secret floating island right over Mor Dhona which turns out to kinda basically be Mt. Olympus. When you show up to poke around, a decent swath of The Twelve pop out and insist you fight them. At first they fake you out with this whole bit about being bent on taking over the world given the new power vacuum but after you go smack them around they just pop up again and apologize for messing with your head. They swear up and down that no, really, they aren’t actually gods someone summoned who are parasitic and mind controlling and all that (but yeah Louisoix totally did someone some of those based on his ideas of them the one time), and don’t actually have any evil plans. They’re just chill party people and they want you to beat them up, for reasons they’re all kinda weirdly coy about. Given that they have freaking adorable little animal alt forms they might have the same basic thing going on as the auspices, the cute animals in a cave who need to be beaten up periodically to not go berserk from post-Stormblood. They’re very upbeat in any case.

Again, this chain is only two out of three 24 person dungeon raids in, time of writing, but they’re super friendly and after you’ve punched roughly 8 out of 12 in the face, a couple ask if you wouldn’t mind touring around with them, checking in on things, as they help the nerds research what their actual deal is more. Somewhere in here Halone, the goddess they worship in Ishgard, asks you for your honest opinion on what her worshipers are like these days and uh... you are diplomatic enough that the list of possible responses doesn’t include being REALLY honest. What with the calling everyone heretics and casting them into pits and waging holy wars against the dragons and all. She’s pretty disappointed in them.

Our other raid meanwhile involves heading into the past again to help some random Ascians deal with daddy issues and some security breaches at the incredibly haunted looking prison for really super dangerous monsters people make that for whatever reason people don’t just unmake. It... really isn’t grabbing me at all, because as I’ve said, they’ve only ever managed to make one Ascian even a little interesting as a character and I particularly can’t for the life of me be made to care about the tragic backstory of Lahabrea of all people. I will note that at one point you pretty much fight Dracula though, and at another point you fight the prehistoric megafauna version of carbuncle, the very pikachu-like starter the summoner class gets. Slightly less cute than the standard variation.

Also the current cliffhanger to all that involves the whole prison appearing in the present, which is less than ideal, but again, resolution to this currently on hold.

Oh and there’s also some sort of choose-your-own-adventure dungeon with 12 possible storylines I... really should have gotten around to before I sat down to write this, and a bit where Alpha and what’s left of Omega are exploring around as the latter continues to struggle with trying to work out the whole power of love and friendship thing. Mostly though, the real meat on the bone here is getting back to that field trip to hell, and a serious extension to Endwalker’s tribute to FF4.

You pop out at this big and honestly quite beautiful gothic castle with twisted and warped architecture just kinda floating in a big cloudy void, and start just kinda charging forward killing any demon who looks at you funny to secure the area, eventually reaching its master, which is... for some baffling reason a nod to Beatrix from FF9? But as soon as you take her down, in swoops another demon you immediately have to fight after he absorbs the big smoke cloudshe desolves into, the archfiend of earth, Scarmiglione, who yes, is the first in a series of four bosses we are going to fight in rapid succession, who are all serving a big super-powerful guy named Golbez, who I guess fairly appropriately swung by to seize power after the last time you were here and killed the final boss from FF3.

Having dealt with that, you just sort of have free reign of the place. There’s still various weird looking demons running around, but while it’s not particularly useful, they’ll talk to you rather than attack. Mostly begging you not to eat them and wondering what they’re going to do now that their mistress is gone. They do however point you to a smarter than average demon they have in the prison in the basement who Beatrice was planning to kill and eat later, who as you go down and let her out, recognizes you and asks if you’re Zenos’ friend.

OK look. You can’t just go and ask a thing like that. Especially not with Y’shtola standing right there, she is definitely the type to be too perceptive and never drop it. Not a conversation to really have in front of Estinien and his new boyfriend either for the matter. Turns out that when Zenos picked up that scythe, officially switching to the Reaper class, he bound his soul to this demon (that’s just what the class’ deal with, you get one too if you take it, proving you somehow learned absolutely nothing about giving random sketchy entities a space key to your soul after Shadowbringers), and ended up back here after he died. Which... is a little confusing to me. Like he DEFINITELY died, but that was at the end of Stormblood, before these two met. Before the credits rolled, the protagonist just had a knock down drag out fist fight with him, and I didn’t get the impression AT ALL that he got punched in the face hard enough to kill him. You could make some kind of argument about him just like burning himself out to get there or not having a way back or something but... there’s a nice cafe right there. Get rest up, get a sandwich and a coffee, show up for an awkward third date in another expansion or two. You don’t go to all that convoluted effort to bring this sick freak back and then give him an implied off camera death. Anyway, you clear up how you know her, and a big light crystal someone suggested you take along for elemental opposition purposes flashes and changes her to a less demonic form.

She’s pretty apathetic and doesn’t really recall a name she feels like giving you, so Y’shtola just decides to call her Zero, and apparently the developers claimed to be incredibly shocked when a huge chunk of the fanbase developed an instant crush on her. Which is about as plausible to me as when Capcom put out that press release about not wanting to see sexy doodles of the giant woman with the cool hat from RE8 and then proceeded to list her exact height and shoe size. Don’t go pretending to be surprised when people are into the badass futch slow to open up half-demon woman who acts tough but is secretly all caring and dresses like freaking Vampire Hunter D. We all see what you’re doing there! Anyway she has plenty of useful info but explains that all interactions here in the void are contract work with payment, generally in the form of draining aether out of each other. Also that the reason she looks human is that she hadn’t been born yet when everyone in the world started turning into demons because look for real she’s just female D here.

Anyway Scarmiglione, as is his deal from FF4, does not stay dead and jumps in with a second boss fight. He and his minions just keep coming back no matter how much you kill them, and Zero explains that yeah, death never sticks here. Now, I already knew that, it’s something I’ve been griping about this whole plot summary, but like, it’s an official canonical thing in the Void. The connection to the whole great aether flow/lifestream from FF7 deal is just broken like a lot of the laws of physics and general state of matter in the area, so when you die either another demon eats what’s left of you, getting stronger but then also having your soul and memories stuck in their head forever, or you just... come back from the dead after a bit, totally fine, at full HP even. She doesn’t actually say “full HP” but she comes weirdly close. So the only way to keep Scarmiglione down, since you not being demons can’t eat him, and she doesn’t want any jerks all bound to her soul like some kind of protagonist of this game, that just leaves her using her super cool ancient artifact scythe that kills you and converts you into a big magic crystal. But you know, gotta pay her first.

Anyway, the other deal with this place is the world’s kinda missing but if you’re sufficiently cool you get your own personally little castle on a floating rock and minions to boss around if you promise not to eat them. Zero invites you back to check hers out and see if any of the loser demons she lets live their if they promise not to start anything know anything useful about this missing dragon sister or this Golbez guy who’s apparently a real big shot she’s not personally familiar with. All the demons look like horrible evil things and they’re all just massive cowardly dorks and I kinda love it. There’s a mindflayer hiding out in a corner who’s all traumatized having gone in for one of those summoning deals and turns out it was just some real Hellraiser type psycho who wanted freaky bondage demon sex and knife play and just nope, nope nope, screw that, back to hell, never getting summoned again thanks!

Anyway on schedule, your next boss fight is Bayonetta. I mean Barbaccia. Or maybe I do mean Bayonetta because she totally has magic hair and halfway through the fight makes a skintight bodysuit out of it and starts making her hands and feat all super huge to smack you around.

After the fight you get one of those Echo flashbacks but all it tells you is Golbez doesn’t do face to face meetings so you still don’t know where to find him, but he does have our missing dragon, who still hasn’t become a demon because dragons are just tough like that. Except for the dragons you fought the first time you were here. OK elder wyrms are tough like that, OK? Anyway, Zero overexerted herself crystalizing Barb and a significant percentage of her mooks, and not really feeling cool leaving her unconscious with always hungry opportunistic demons around, you drag her back out with you. I appreciate how the whole party apologizes profusely for yanking her to another dimension without her consent, it is kind of a rude thing to do. In order to help her recover you bring her some apples, and she just goes “OK the deal was supposed to be that I take your aether directly, but, I guess this still works, holds her hand out, and drain’s an apple’s life force out.

And this of course leads into this whole “no no, eat it all regular, get the flavor” and her not really being impressed, and you giving her a tour around the place, and promising to take her home, and her just being “I literally don’t care about anything that isn’t basic survival, we’ve been over this. You wanna keep paying me in apples to help with your thing, sure, otherwise I’ll just sit around wherever.” But then you’ve got a whole thing with Cagnazzo getting conjured through by demon summoners Golbez has an in with in what’s left of the empire, Vrtra feeling his sister’s presence over there, which turns out to just be her eye, but it’s something, and generally dropping everything to run up that way. And while you’re distracted with that, Rubicante slips through the other portal and smashes it so you no longer have the upper hand on travel. Oh and I’m just kind of assuming you’re on a first name basis with the major bosses from FF4 here. If you aren’t go play FF4 already, it’s an absolute classic. But yeah, Italian names, elemental themes. Earth zombie, wind woman, water turtle-guy, fire flasher.

While you’re being distracted up in what’s left of them empire, because you know, they also brought a whole horde of demons around and the people who are survivng out there are just barely surviving, you run into the twins again. Alisaie is super jealous she didn’t get to go to hell. And you encourage Zero to socialize with the locals a little, figuring maybe she’ll get along better with depressed former nazis than socially functioning people. And she kinda does. Bonds with that jerk from the one cutscene I linked last time a little over buuz. Spicy mongolian dumplings. Imported from the steppe here, and the absolute food worship from Endwalker continues. It comes in a paper takeout bag too.

We’ve got hair misaligned textures on hair that clips through people’s collars in cutscenes all the time still, but we are pushing these graphics to the absolute cutting edge to tear apart cheeseburgers and spicy dumplings. Like most depressed goth women I know, Zero is super into spicy food. Damn it I’m hungry now. Anyway people get spread around, Zero feels obligated to fight off a big horde of demons alone to pay back that free buuz. Partway through the boss does the fairly standard trick of dropping rocks from the sky that you need to face tank before they hit the ground, but there’s too many dropping at once to solo so down she goes (I have the same problem trying to solo a couple otherwise easy old bosses, it’s annoying). And then of course everyone else shows up to the rescue, heals her, and has a proper fight where she learns the meaning of friendship via standard boss mechanics. We get more of the spread out and catch the rocks, and some of the “everybody run to the person with the crosshairs on her to split the damage of an attack that’d otherwise kill her” thing, and yeah, thanks to the combined impact of that and spicy dumplings, she comes around to the concept of doing good things for people without a contract. Again I much prefer this sort of stock sappy love and friendship crap to the grey morality political crap from the start of the game.

That just leaves confronting Rubicante to ask about what Golbez’ deal even is, and fight him. And you know, then fight Golbez when these patches finish releasing. Turns out his plan is actually really straightforward. Every single demon has been alive and literally living in hell since the very first time Ascians tried to recombine things and messed it up, most are all screwed up from absorbing the souls of a bunch of wimps they beat to death, and let’s be frank here, a lot of them have real messed up bodies like just a floating head, or big wad of goop with a ton of eyeballs. Many of them would largely like to come over here where death at least theoretically sticks sometimes and properly get to he afterlife. It’s pretty hard to object to that, except you know, they’re also all big horrible monsters with the uncontrollable urge to eat people and it’d probably cause one of those cataclysmic elemental imbalances and also these guys are jerks literally delivering body parts of a hostage. And of course this is all in a big post-boss fight speech before Rubicante kills himself all honorable warrior style, so first we have this big fight with a fun gimmick tracing lines across moving puzzle pieces, and while the other three had pretty standard renditions of either the normal boss theme or the theme of Golbez and pals, when this fight starts we get the unmistakable strings and drums from an all-time classic remix.

youtube

No really. In one of the most impressive fan service moves of all time, they actually tracked down Hyadain for an official commission to use this remix. That’s just great even if they DID chicken out on the lyrics. Maybe later for one of those tell-this-bard-about-it remix fights with the whole set or something. As is here’s the version we actually have.

youtube

Anyway we leave off with a challenge to come face Golbez on the moon. The uh, moon in the Void to be clear. Which presumably has a nice Lunar Subterrane tribute going on. And past that, I don’t know. It certainly feels like we’re setting up dimension hopping for the next expansion, but if I stopped this far into the interlude after Heavensward I’d have thought we’d be going directly into Shadowbringers. This might resolve and then the last patch sets up some completely different thing. All I know is I’m not going to care about the whole Ascian prison raid, I don’t expect a real shocking twist to fighting the rest of the Twelve, and wow between Fray, Sadu, Gaia, Y’shtola’s class-change look, and Zero here, it is VERY clear the current head writer has a Type.

Short of double checking the last 10 levels of the few job quest lines I haven’t done for interesting bits, I have nothing left to sum up, at least until there’s another expansion to this. If you enjoyed all this though, again, money so I can survive would really be appreciated. I also have a wishlist of mostly games I’ll likely have thoughts on when I get to them. And if you somehow found this blog without seeing it, you might enjoy my also rather extensive multipart essay from a few years back about how Ranma, the character, is in fact trans, on top of the magic gender change stuff.

Past that, not sure what my next big project is going to be. Might get back to Twitch streaming, or just focus on this browser game I’ve been working on for a while. I have honestly enjoyed playing FF14 a hell of a lot more than most recent entries in the series and definitely more than any other MMO, so I could MAYBE be convinced to see what’s up with 11 if I can work out how to without costing me a ton of money and time I really don’t have? We’ll see.

Now that you’ve finished this depreciated version of this, here’s the formal, finished part 10, covering this but with more, you know, conclusions.

#final fantasy 14 #ff14 #final fantasy xiv #ffxiv #it was legit tempting to skip this and just end on that last part's note #will this renewed interest in hyadain remixes finally give us wood man and air man?

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stealingbones · 2 years ago

Text

can i just,, rant about south park? (spoiler warning obv)

I never thought id be into basic american adult tv buthere we are- I recently got into it, feb 19th i started watching and finished the whole 26 seasons and two games (sot and tfbw) in a month. Just finished tfbw game earlier today and almost lost my mind fr bc wth man.... anyway, theres your background for how mentally ill i am, now-

South park characters have so much detail in their characters, right down to the little things, like cartman having to finish singing sail away or kenny liking oragami, like??? i love the little character details that nobody thinks about hello??

Its so hard to take them seriously with that stupid artstyle (the artstyle has grown on me and i love it sm but still, theyre hella goofy) but seriously some parts cut deep- especially the whole fucking covid thing, never in my life did i think id cry at fUCKING SOUTH PARK ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? I see a lot of angst and it actually makes sense??? And just,, a lot of stan's stuff is really depressing, i hate the episode(s) 'youre getting older' holy fuck. The fact that stan knows how to drive at 8 years old most likely because his dad is an alcoholic who drives drunk too is graaAAA,, I feel so bad for butters too, the innocent child who gets all the trauma dumped on him 💀 none of the kids in south park are safe from trauma, not even 'new kid' (they fr made you choose a parent, dude.....) one of my favorite serious moments though actually is when kenny tries to get them to remember his deaths, the like "TRY AND FUCKING REMEMBER." is so dramatic and im fbedhunfinjecnijef

also cartman being the only one to remember kenny's deaths waa,, Cartmanland he says 'what kenny? he dies all the time' and when kenny tries to make the others remember,, cartman isnt there so á, then cartman isnt shocked when kenny escapes wherever tf cthuhlu sent everyone. cartman did drink kenny's ashes so that could be the reason he remembers epic

also also, i didnt even think about it before until i seen just kenny and kyle at the bus stop, but stan and cartman moving away and just having two of the main four left at the iconic bus stop scene is so upsetting,, I enjoy the older seasons best 💔 Like season 10 and earlier man,, their early seson voices too omg <3 When they started doing season long stories was kind of annoying (edit bc new episode dropped, they put cartman back lmao,, still missing stan though man...)

Switching topics- No wonder style is more popular than stendy, it has more content than stendy even though theyre cannon dating 💀i think cartman and wendy interaction more actually. Wendy's kind of cool and i wish theyd make an effort to show her and stan together more often (even small things like they do with creek) and a few times its even shown how little stan cares, like with the texting thing or the time they broke up for a bit stan had said he hadnt talked to her for weeks... Stan doesnt deserve wendy tbh, i also always forget she killed someone for stan lol, they really dialed her crazy back,,

I probably have more random thoughts but these are the main ones,, the little guys have been doing laps around my brain for a month straight and i feel like im going to explode

#sp #south park #Fandom post #Rant/story post #text post

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kleinstar · 2 years ago

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how did u get into this series? 👀 what's ur fav dynamic, and your fav character (probably apart from eiden)?

ASK ME ABOUT NU:C (NOT ACCEPTING)

Let's see... I'm like half convinced I saw a picture of Edmonds really stupid uniform (sorry nuc i cant take it seriously) in twitter which is when I took notice of it but I dont think I downloaded the game then... I faintly recall being like oh he which was Olivine like 'oh he looks nice' but didn't expect to really get into the game at all but boom Eiden drew me in pretty much immediately lol. Liked him from the start. Storywise speaking i think first chapter that i liked a lot was kuya's but i think the story didn't grab me until Garu's weirdly enough bc the dude's my least fave lol, Dante's chapter even more though.

Faves....Aside Eiden, Rei was just introduced but he's already a fave of mine, the pretty aloof personality (for now! he only met Eiden) paired with obvious underlying issues (reasons still a mystery) that he's got. Has a bit complicated relationship with sex where he seems to treat it more as a tool to achieve goals (get magical items etc, study essense... ) than something fun (to the point where he'll even go through unpleasant stuff for it) where its easy to see how Eiden will fit into that ! He's like this ....researcher type but his personality is very different from the usual archetype s so it's interesting for sure - ALSO FATHER IS REALLY CUTE It's still pretty interesting to see how it'll develop, I'm glad the main story's taking it's time with him bc i think nuc does a bit better when it slows things down rather than crams it up into one thing for sure. 'I've seen people complain about nothing happening these chapters but its like...time, atmosphere settling, wish the game did this more often. It doesn't work with events bc limited story space and all. His intimacy stories also expand on him pretty nice.

Kuya is other fave because apparently i like resident bastards but yeah, mr-im bored bc long life which is also why it's hard to open up. Youkai and humans also have a difficult relationship, have had for a long time so Eiden's attempts in patching things up piss him off a lot but also bring him that element of surprise he so enjoys when things dont go the way he expects - hope makes it painful when it goes wrong after all. I also like his dynamic with Eiden a lot - which is really just Eiden kinda trying to please him with best of his efforts. He finds it amusing ofc and with recent developments he even seems to like it when eiden just does his own thing - not that he'd admit - eiden 'owes' him so much now since he's let him close. He calls him a toy, it's amusing how he tries so much and brings so many surprises right.... It's cute dynamic.

Those two are pretty much faves but dynamicwise close come Dante, Quincy Olivine and Blade tho! I'm not running introduction on them though.

Dynamicswise... With Dante it's that fun bickering with Eiden but also the differences that flare things up, finding bridge between them and so on, I love his Kleinmas event intimacy story a lot. Also Olivine's got that fun serene horny vibes but also really calm, cute and sincere moments that also feel really fresh, I also love how he's just " : )" when eiden just horny stuff. It's actually cute.

Quincy too though, similar as with Kuya but also differently he's grown tired of the long life he's had but Eiden's opened him up and stuff. Also different (but not completely different) to kuya he likes when Eiden does his own thing, likes it when he's selfish too which balances out great since Eiden's very people pleaser type so that nice chill moments just work out very cute too.

I also like Eiden's dynamics with morvay though lmao fellow hornies exchanging tips with each other and stuff, it's fun.

#schleckermaul #I HAVE A LOT FEELINGS hard to cram up things in one

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cinnamonest · 3 years ago

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Kaeya is really touchy with his darling, right? So then,, what are the other Yan’s love languages?

NICE I love the love languages stuff! Sorry this was from April but I'm finally getting to it! Usually the two are similar, but sometimes people have different ways of expressing love versus how they want to receive it, so I'll elaborate on that as well. Enjoy my rareish semi-fluffy stuff, boys and which of the 5 love languages they are :3 Kazuha - quality time

Honestly, he's a simple boy. All he really needs to be happy and feel mutual love is sit with you close to him, arms wrapped around you, preferably with you returning the gesture. He has a lot of feelings and fears for the future, lots of emotions all bottled up, so someone to listen to him means a lot. Taking the time to listen to all he has to say makes him sheepish and embarrassed even, but as long as you assure him it's ok, he'll keep coming back for more of your listening ears.

Also, he likes to go on walks. These can be talking or not, sometimes he just likes walking in silence. Either way, accompanying him on said walks is a way to endear yourself to him and show him you love him. Sometimes it's just silently walking down beaches or pathways or in circles around the ship deck, sometimes it's him venting, sometimes it's him gushing about this or that... either way, basically providing him with an outlet for his emotions and spending time with him is what matters.

Zhongli - gifts, quality time

Sugar daddy

But in all seriousness he's big on spoiling a darling. I mean let's be real it's probably someone else's money OR this is in an era where he could just make some, so he will literally get you anything you could ask for, hell, anything he sees you looking at, tons of things you have no use for but he just likes the way your eyes light up all the same. It makes you happy, and that's what love is about, right? Wanting to make people you love happy.

However, for himself, it's a quality time thing, similar to Kazuha's where it's a lot of listening. He has a lot to say sometimes and can get to rambling about details of this or that thing he somehow manages to be an expert on, and while he usually catches himself early on, sometimes he can REALLY go on a while. He knows you don't have any clue what he's talking about, and probably don't really care, but if you sudden bring up a detail that shows you were listening -- it makes him feel oddly warm inside, like you actually think what he talks about is important and care about it. It makes him chuckle a bit, pat your head. He tells you if you're bored you don't have to listen.... so if you insist on doing so anyway, well, that just makes him feel even better inside, oddly validated in a way.

Kaeya - words of affirmation, touch

Is sex a love language?

But in all seriousness, yes as per the opening of the ask, he's very touchy. By 'touch' in this case, that... does translate to sex about 90% of the time. Can you blame him?? It's because he loves you! If he didn't love you he wouldn't wanna get his dick in you so bad! It's love that makes him so handsy and touchy, always rubbing you and running the edges of his fingers under your shirts and skirts and shorts even in public, hands wrapping around your waist and hips, sneaking fondles here and there... and it's out of love that you get railed all the time. His peak happiness is just being balls deep inside you, bodies pressed up against each other, moving slow and gentle and gradually building up... and he wants you to feel like that's love, too. To be honest he gets genuinely sad if you don't see it that way, or if you don't understand it as an expression of love. It seems so natural and innate that being pressed up close together should invoke feelings of love, right?

As for how he understands love as a recipient, well, pretty much the same thing, any sign of eagerness or willingness or especially initiative to fuck sets his brain off. But also, he's weak to any attempts to boost his ego. Say anything positive about him and he'll get excited and let it go to his head, particularly if your words of choice make him feel strong or powerful or capable.

Also speaking of touch, surprisingly big on handholding, especially in public. Sure part of it is a "signaling to others to back off" sort of thing, but he just likes the warmth of your hand as well.

Diluc - touch

It might be a bit surprising, given the stoic nature but... just give this man a hug. Please.

Being inside you is very very nice of course, but he's also notably a cuddly person when you get past the rough exterior. He likes to just sit you in his lap and hold you, spoon you in bed at night, etc.

And as for giving, he doesn't really have knowledge of how to go about other things. He's not good with words at all, he doesn't really know what gifts to get, and despite his affection he's not really submissive enough of a person to go about acts of service, and he's very busy, so while he might get quality time, it's not too often. In the end he doesn't really know how to do anything else, so if he really wants to express affection, the only way he can really think of is just wrapping his arms around you and squeezing. Sometimes a little too hard, like sir I'm asphyxiating please

Also it takes him a while to work up to it. At first he's just too nervous and can barely touch you without retracting his hand back out of nervousness, but he gets used to it.

Razor - quality time, touch

The others are kind of foreign concepts, really. But touch and time is how his kind bond! It's what he's used to. Nuzzling his face into your shoulders and neck and wrapping arms around you and holding you tight. He will often just cling to you physically in some way, holding your wrist in his hand or reaching out to embrace you at random. Of course, sex is a part of it, gotta have that too, it means love to him because he gets the urge whenever he thinks about loving you! And not gonna lie, he tries to remember you don't really like it but, he'll lick you every now and then too. It just comes naturally because he gets excited 'cause he loves you so much!! Lick lick.

Quality time comes in many forms. Every second is quality time in its own way, but especially naps in the sun and walks through the woods. Fun fact: wolf mates go on little "walks" together occasionally, breaking off from the rest of the pack to get alone time. It's fun! You can run through the woods with him! The naps combine the two expressions of touch and time, getting to spend lots of quiet, valuable time, all while snuggled up close. It's nice.

He doesn't really understand if you try to communicate love otherwise, but he'll kind of grasp that it's nice. But really, in the end he wants touch and time too. It's the only form he really understands. The rest just leave him a bit "??" But a nuzzle and a nap in the sun are things he understands perfectly.

Xingqiu - gifts, words of affirmation

The first is more how he shows, the second how he receives. It's a rather selfish form of love, really, because it benefits him as well and it's not exactly difficult. He doesn't have to put a lot of work into gifting, since he can pretty much get anything he asks for out of his father, and even if he says no to something, well, father won't notice a few hundred thousand mora gone from the stash of money kept in his bedroom, right? And he loves giving you gifts because of your reaction! You smile and say thank you and it makes him feel all warm and fuzzy inside... and he likes to think that maybe you feel indebted to him, maybe you're awed and impressed by how he manages to find you such expensive and rare things, maybe it makes you look up to him and see him as superior a bit. Hopefully.

However, because he's got so much wealth already, so gifts don't really do much for him. He responds well to praise, though, especially if you compliment him on the things he cares about, like his sword skills, his writing, his vigilantism. Make him feel like the protagonist he is inside his head, and he'll be beaming with pride and happiness, it makes him feel important, which translates to feeling loved.

Chongyun - quality time, acts of service

In particular, he likes to have you around when he's training. You don't have to train yourself, just be by his side. It makes him more motivated, so he's noticed. Not to mention, he likes showing off if possible to impress you.

Also, he likes having someone to vent to. He's a sweet boy, but he has his stressors and frustrations. He's used to strict self-discipline and normally refrains from talking about his feelings too much, but if you make him feel like your presence is a safe place for him to come to, he will end up almost becoming dependent on getting to emotionally unload on you every day, recalling all the details of every bad thing that happened and waiting for your soft comfort.

Here, "acts of service" is more like... consideration. Little moments where he's reminded you remember his needs and care about them. You make food and note that you made it especially free of anything hot, just for him! Or you make his little popsicles when he forgets, you help him deal with the damage and destruction of his most recent episode. Little acts like that make him feel appreciated, loved and cared for.

Childe - acts of service

Similar to Kaeya and touch, acts of service is... yeah it's basically sex. It falls more into the category of acts of service because it's a little different in nature from Kaeya's -- he loves normal sex of course, and cuddles are nice too, but in his mind really loving him is about taking initiative and doing things to him... in other words, to translate that in simple terms... blow him. Please. It would make him the happiest man in the world. Or ride him. Just anything that feels like you taking some initiative and making him feel wanted. ...And making him feel worshipped is nice too, getting you down on your knees in front of him or any act of service and submission gives him a sort of high from the ego boost and masculine validation.

And he's similar with how he expresses it himself. Most likely candidate to eat you out against your will. One infuriating and potentially humiliating thing about him is he's one of the most insistent to ensure you cum every single time, if you don't cum from him fucking you he'll just force your legs open and eat you out or shove his fingers into you until you do. Because he loves you and orgasms equate to love in his mind.

Venti - acts of service, words of affirmation, gifts

It's more on the giving end for him -- specifically, he can be a very sappy individual when he's in love, to a point it's nauseating to the people around you, really. But he spends a lot of time writing you poems and songs. To him, song is one of the utmost powerful expressions of love. It sort of combines the service and words -- the writing itself is a labor of love, but the words are filled with praises. He genuinely spends a lot of time on it, though, and it's really important to him that you like the things he makes and plays for you, and will continuously modify his next pieces to what he perceives as your taste. He's a bit of a perfectionist on stuff like that.

Venti is actually rather shy when it comes to receiving love. He tends to be very no, you don't have to do that for me! And things like gifts can make him feel a bit guilty, so... you just have to give him stuff he likes so much he's too busy indulging to feel guilt. Namely alcohol. He gets a bit red in the face, but, deep down he likes words of affirmation and compliments too, even the lightest of sweet words he'll replay in his head over and over for days after you say them.

Bennett - acts of service

One of the quickest ways to endear yourself to him is the simple act of helping him. This can manifest in several ways, such as healing his wounds when he's all scraped up or just come back from an adventure, helping him patch up his clothes that get ripped so much, helping him find some thing he lost in the woods yet again, or following him on one of said adventures. People don't really have him in mind too often, he tends to get forgotten a lot and left to handle things all on his own, and as a result, someone who reaches out to help him has a significant impact on him, he finds himself unable to stop thinking about it and the warm feeling it gives him to know that someone cares.

As a result, he starts basically mimicking the same behaviors because it's all he really knows how to do. He wants to give you the same warm happiness that you give him, so he tries to help you out with the things you need, complete tasks he knows would be helpful to you. Unfortunately for him, this tends to backfire as something usually goes wrong and it turns into a mess that he fears will just make you hate him. Poor baby.

Albedo - quality time

He's one of those people that really loves to just spend time in the presence of the people he loves -- you don't have to be doing something together, or the same thing. Even if you're just reading a book or drawing or something on your own, he likes you to be nearby him. It's kinda cute how if you go wandering off or go into another room, he'll wait a minute, then silently kinda come peeking around the corner to check on you because?? Why did you leave? Did he do something to upset you? He's too proud to explicitly ask you to come back, but he might blatantly follow you to the room you're in, claiming it's just better lighting in here, or the other room was too cold, or some other excuse.

He still likes doing things with you, though, too. Another favorite is late night conversations, the kind you get into once you're already laying in bed in the dark, pressed against each other and mumbling little thoughts that occur to you before you drift off to sleep, questions about tomorrow, or a hey remind me to do this or that, that sort of thing. Little conversations you never really finish, your voices get softer and sleepier with each moment, you eventually close your eyes as you talk back and forth, until one of you eventually doesn't get a response, and then drifts off themselves.... and in the morning neither of you remember who was the last person to speak or what the conversation was even about in the end.

Xiao - touch

He just doesn't... get much else. Words are hard. He doesn't know whether this or that gift or gesture is considered appropriate to present to a human as sign of love, and those kinds of things, words and gifts and stuff, embarrass him too much... and he doesn't every really know whether or not he's correct when interpreting your actions and words either. How does he know the gift isn't just because you wanted to be nice, or that the nice things you said were just meant mildly, and he's just indulging in wishful thinking when he thinks it means more? Ugh. It's too troublesome to have to deal with.

But touch... it's straightforward and easy and impossible to misunderstand. And it's also objectively the best, he thinks, even without the issues in understanding it's just what he feels the most natural urge towards. Why would anyone do any differently? Why do humans waste their time giving each other gifts and compliments and stuff when they could just do the thing that feels so much better than that other stuff? It confuses him. He doesn't want material goods, he just wants to cuddle you and put his dick in you. Yeah it... also translates to sex here, similar to Kaeya. Like, he likes it when you kiss his forehead and snuggle up close, but those things will inevitably result in wanting more. And he loves the rests you two take, half-asleep soundly wrapped up and bodies pressed close, spooning with his arms latched onto you. It's just that said rests/naps are almost always very much naked due to being after cumming in you a few times.

Scaramouche - acts of service, words of affirmation, touch

I mean, you're kinda forced into the acts of service thing, but the idea is that you start to perform said acts willingly, or without needing to be commanded. Eventually you get to where you do things on your own initiative, and he likes to think maybe you just want to (and not because you've been beaten into doing it so many times it's become instinctive, definitely not that). A lot of it is just tasks, but similar to Childe's acts of service, it's definitely a sex thing too, wants you to show initiative and do things on your own -- not that you won't likely get told not to do shit like that without permission, but he still does like it, internally.

Words of praise are similar. Say anything nice about him and he'll probably accuse you of lying or trying to manipulate him/get something, but deep down he kinda thrives on anything positive you have to say or think about him. Not that you'd ever know.

As for how he actually shows love, well... does... he...? Yes actually, primarily it's a touch thing. Not always pleasant touches, but touches. It's similar to how other yans equate different things with love, like Childe sees orgasms as a form of love, to him possession is the utmost expression of "love" in the sense that he perceives it. Possession, to own a thing completely and entirely, to have full power over something... that sort of connection is incredibly intimate, when you think about it. It's a connection on a deep level, it's loving. So anything that expresses possession -- pleasant or unpleasant for you -- is thus an expression of love.

#lena's asks #atml #scheduled post

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absolutelyfizzing · 3 years ago

Text

plant mom

(Bucky x reader)

description - When Bucky met you you were a leather clad assassin. The next day he finds you in cottagecore clothes taking care of your plants. He cant help but be fascinated.

word count - 1300

warnings - None really? fluffy? confident reader and mentions of gun skills

A/N - This takes place sort of out of timeline? Like all of the avengers living in the compound without any of the crazy shit going on.

MASTERLIST

Bucky was fascinated by you. You were an avenger with a similar skill set to Natasha. You were a badass assassin plus you were the best sharpshooter in the group. Obviously, not with a bow like Clint but you could just about hit anything in any conditions with your rifle. You were terrifying and you even actually scared Bucky the first time you met him, your body clad in black leather and your gun strapped to your back. You looked murderous. That was why, when he walked downstairs into the kitchen the next day, he was shocked at what he found.

You were wearing a light sundress with butterfly clips in your hair and comfy looking socks. You were nursing a hot cup of tea and you seemed to be dancing slightly to the music you were playing on your phone. From what Bucky could tell it was something slow and sweet and he was astonished. He knew you were the same person he saw yesterday but you seemed so innocent now.

"Hey, James!" You chirped and he was startled out of his daze. You were smiling at him and he felt his heart melt slightly.

"Hello." He mumbled against his will. He didn't want to scare you off or come off too strong but after what he had just said he was worried he would come off cold.

"Do you wanna come and say hi to my plants?" You asked lightly and Bucky wondered how he hadn't noticed before. The counter next to you was filled with plants of all kinds. They were happy and healthy and you gazed at them for a moment as if they were your children.

"Say hi to them?" Bucky questioned, not sure what you were asking of him.

"Yeah! Or you could just come see them if you want. Did you know that spending time with plants is proven to improve mood?" You questioned in a genuine tone. You seemed so content and Bucky couldn't help it when his feet began to move him toward where you were hoarding a small forrest.

"Hello plants." He mumbled like he was embarrassed. When he looked at you you were beaming at him and he suddenly realized he would do anything to make you look at him like that. "Can I ask why they are all here?" He tried to ask in a tone that would let you know that he wasn't trying to be judgmental.

"Well, it's watering day and these are the ones that I needed to give a wipe down so I just brought them from my room. In hindsight that might not have been a great decision but thats okay." You seemed to be in a great mood and Bucky would find that you were just like this unless you had a good reason not to be.

"Do you want help carrying them back to your room?" He asked before he could even think about what he was offering. You immediately smiled and nodded.

"That would be so helpful. Thank you, James" His heart was in his throat at your words. You disposed of your finished mug in the dishwasher and picked up an armful of pots, motioning for him to do the same. He did and he followed you to your room which was just down the hall, trying his hardest not to jostle any of the plants in his arms too hard. When you got to the door you asked FRIDAY to open it for you and he was astonished at what he saw inside.

It was like a jungle. There were a couple huge pots that he thought even he might have trouble lifting and then throughout the room was every kind of plant he could imagine. They covered your windowsill and bookshelf, hanging from the ceiling and the walls. He felt you take a few of the pots from his arms and he realized he had been staring, the green tinted sunlight catching him in a daze.

"This is amazing, doll. How do you keep them all alive?"

"I don't know I guess. I just love them and they seem to like me back." You shrugged and he felt a warm smile come to his face.

"They're beautiful"

"Thank you! You're welcome to come in and visit them any time, it's pretty soothing to be around." You looked around the room in pride. You had been building your collection for years and they were your favorite hobby. You had made Tony give you the room with the most sunlight in the whole compound.

"I might have to take you up on that" Bucky mumbled and he thought that he would love to spend some time in here. The plants were not his main motive though, he wanted a way to spend more time with you. "You know, this isn't how I expected you to live considering how you looked when we met yesterday."

"Oh I know, I get that a lot. If a sundress was as practical I would love to wear that instead of the bodysuit but unfortunately the enemy doesn't usually get intimidated by that sort of stuff." You almost seemed sad that you couldn't do such things when you were on the job.

"I think you look great either way." Bucky spoke before he thought and he regretted his words. Not that he didn't think they were true but he was scared you would be offended by the thoughts he had accidentally spoken aloud.

Instead you beamed at him, a smile appearing on your face and a slight chuckle leaving your lips.

"Thank you, James. You know, I normally wait a while before I do this but would you want a plant?" You questioned seriously. Bucky thought for a moment that you were kidding but soon realized that you weren't when you made no move to laugh.

"Are you sure? I don't know if I could keep one alive." He honestly didn't. He hadn't ever tried to keep a plant.

"Well I would give you some care instructions and I would come check on it every once in a while. Pretty much everyone else has one except Tony, he kept killing them and I eventually gave up. But you are absolutely welcome to one if you'd like. Is there one that catches your eye?"

The question breaks Bucky out of the trance he had gone into when you spoke and he looked around the room at the seemingly endless array of plants.

"Could you chose? Maybe something easy?" He asked quietly. As he finished his question you were already moving toward a plant that fit his description.

You came back toward him with very small leafy plant that Bucky thought looked very healthy.

"This one is one I propagated pretty recently, he should be pretty easy for you." You muttered reassuringly.

"He?" Bucky questioned and you just nodded as if it were obvious. Bucky then found himself realizing that his excuse to be in your presence was leaving quickly and he was wracking his brain to try to come up with a reason that he should keep talking to you.

"Hey this might be a bit forward but would you want to go to dinner sometime?" You asked confidently and Bucky thought he might have a heart attack.

"I-uh-I yeah. Yes that would be great." Bucky smiled and he couldn't be more thankful that you had stepped in. "Would you maybe, I don't know, I mean theres this place on the other side of town. Its a little old fashioned but-" He started to stutter.

"I would love to go there, or really anywhere. You tell me how dressed up I need to be and I'm all in." You grinned and Bucky couldn't stop beaming at you. At how open you were. He couldn't help but hope that you would maybe rub off on him and he prayed he could keep this plant alive to impress you.

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english8muffin · 4 years ago

Text

Vogue morning routine

Y/N Y/N/L’s guide to effortless natural makeup

Summary: you are asked to do the Vogue Beauty Secrets video and your two boys decide to join the party

Word count: around 2000

Warning: none, just pure floof!

I apologize in advance if there are any spelling and/or grammar mistakes, English is not my first language (+ this is my very first fic)

HEADLINE Henry Cavill’s new girlfriend, designer Y/N Y/L/N reveals her everyday morning routine in recent Vogue video: Y/N Y/L/N shows off her secrets to the perfect fusion of European and Asian beauty.

You stood in the spacious bathroom of the hotel room, only wearing a big, fluffy, white robe, that was actually Henry’s. But since the man was in the gym, you took the opportunity to lend it and bathe yourself in his musky smell, that calmed your nerves. Last night you started panicking, thinking you would probably look stupid for the entire world to see, luckily Henry and Kal tried to calm you down with cuddles and kisses.

This was the first ‘interview’ you would do, being such a young, successful entrepreneur really caught the attention of the media. When you first started your small online shop, you never would have thought you would end up here. Five years later, with a steady income, the job you always wished for and the man you had a crush on since the first time you laid eyes on him. Being a creative, it really made your heart soar with happiness, seeing all your products, your babies, in new homes where they would make others happy.

You were really proud of yourself. Henry was as well, and he made sure you and everybody around you knew. You were apprehensive at first, being with such a well known actor, who was also much older than you, it made you nervous of what people would say, what the media would say. You didn’t want to tarnish Henry’s image. You knew there were people with a much bigger age gap, but still, people were ruthless. So you both decided to take it slow, being careful with going out in public and social media posts.

You stand in front of the large mirror, which had a camera attached to it and open up your makeup bag. Right before you went into the bathroom, you made yourself a nice cup of tea, trying to stay calm. “Hi! I’m Y/N and today I am going to show you my everyday makeup routine,” you say with a smile, “I am not a dermatologist so please don’t take what I say too seriously.”

You grab a small white washcloth and hold it up, so it was in the frame, “First, I am going to wash my face and put on a few drops of serum,” You dampen the cloth and wipe it over your face and neck. You put a few drops in the palm of your hand and pat them into your skin. “Now I going to use my jade roller to massage the serum into my skin. It’s quite funny seeing so many people use these nowadays. In ancient China they were mostly used by the elite to keep there skin ageless. They would call jade the Stone of Heaven. It’s really helpful for the people who wake up with a puffy face like me,” you chuckle.

Somethimes you’d wake up with puffy cheeks, which led to Henry calling you his chubby bunny in the morning.

“Just a quick tip, and this is for everybody, make sure you always use SPF. I personally use SPF 30 and this one is shine control, since I tend to get an oily skin, but you can also use a regular one or a foundation with SPF in it. Believe me when I say your skin will be thankful.”

You grab the small tube of sun cream and show the amount you’ll use. You even convinced Henry to wear SPF everyday. At first he said he didn’t think it would make such a big difference, but when he realised you were going to be the one to put it on him, he was convinced about its benefits and adamant to wear it everyday. After working the thick cream into your skin, you put on some lipbalm and rummage through the pouch in front of you. When you find the product you’re looking for, you hold it up. “Now, I am going to put on a bit of concealer, this one is from Maybelline. After this, I will use a lighter shade under my eyes and on my acne scars that I have here,” you point and circle around the small cluster of scars on the sides of your cheeks.

Before blending out the concealer, you smile at the lens and put in two bright yellow hairclips, to keep your dark locks from falling into your face. “I probably should have done this at the start,” you laugh. The nerves creeping up a little. It wasn’t that you where a shy person, but knowing thousands of people will watch this, did something to you. You were always a very easygoing person, who could talk with pretty much everybody. But knowing people were going to watch you do something so intimate in a way, and would probably comment on it, scared you a little. While you would be 100% yourself, doing something as mundane as getting ready. If they didn’t like you now, then they probably won’t like you later. And that was what made you so afraid.

The bathrobe falls a bit down your shoulder, but you ignore it, since your hair fell down your shoulders in big waves. “Okay, brows. I used to block them in really dark when I was younger, but now I try to keep a light hand. I’ll use this Got 2B Glued as a brow gel afterwards. The tails of my eyebrows tend to move if I don’t use a strong enough gel. If you’re Asian you will understand the struggle.”

You quickly finish your brows, put some bronzer on your face and eyelids and take out your liquid eyeliner. “Am I the only one that acts like I’m a beauty guru whenever I do my makeup? Like, I’m just acting as if I’m used to this, right now, but to be honest, I was really nervous to do this video for Vogue,” you admit, “they will probably regret asking me,” you chuckle. You finish your eyemakeup with curling your long lashes, thanks to your mother’s genes, and add a coat of mascara.

You take in a deep breath, excited to show everyone the product you had been waiting for. “The next thing I am really proud to show you guys, because I designed the packaging. This is the new limited edition blush and highlighter palette from Dior, which they created for Lunar New Year!” You beam with pride, holding up the elegant looking palette. It had a darker toned glossy finish and the borders were the traditional Chinese looking frames, which were 3D and were surrounded by a wild variety of peonies. In the middle of the lid was your Chinese calligraphy in big golden brush stokes that said ‘year of the Ox’, the clasp was designed so it resembled an antique Chinese coin and on the side hung a jade charm.

“You can pre-order this palette now, I think they will put a link-thingy in de description. I wish you all a happy and blessed Lunar New Year, ��农历年新年快乐牛年大吉!”

Just as you’re about to add some blush to your cheeks, the bathroom door creaks open and a curly-headed, sweaty Henry pops his head in. Fresh from the gym, and were you thankful for his new intense workout, because he was truely a sight to behold. A cheeky smile graces his handsome face when he spots you in front of the mirror, only wearing his robe, which made his grin widen.

“what are you doing in here? Are you hiding from me? Playing hide and seek is it?” he teases and rakes his large hand through the tousled curls, but just as he’s done speaking, he sees the camera behind you, and blushes. “Oh, I didn’t know you were filming, I’m sorry darling,” he smiles and gives a small wave in the direction of the camera. You led out a giggle, cheeks turning red already, if he’d keep this up, you wouldn’t need to add blush. You couldn’t focus anymore, he looked so attractive, only wearing his black gym shorts and a tight dark blue tank top. Damn that camera, otherwise you would have jumped him. Henry, thought the exact same thing. Seeing you, only wearing his robe and your hair still a bit wild from this morning’s cardio, made him hold back a moan. Those two cute, yellow clips in your hair could have fooled him, because you were anything but innocent.

Before he’s about to close the door again, he blows you a kiss. But his actions are stopped when a big bear makes his appearance. Bolting past his dad’s legs, Kal comes into the bathroom. Henry tries to catch him but misses. The black and white akita excitedly sniffs his head around the sink, trying to see what you were up to with all the stuff lying on the marble counter.

“Kal!” Henry whisper-yelled, trying to stay hidden behind the door. But you could still see his massive body crouched down behind the wood. It was rather funny, seeing the large man so panicked about getting his dog to listen. It kind of reminded you of that one video from BBC were a professor was being interviewed and his baby and nanny showed up in the background. While Henry tried to get Kal’s attention, the dog just sat next to your legs, and smiled when you pet him behind his ear. He was your good boy.

You both knew there was no other option but to keep Kal here, once he saw you do your makeup, he wanted to watch and get his ‘makeup’ done as well.

Henry also saw the look in Kal’s eyes and let out a sigh. Might as well stay with his two loves. He stood up from his position and walked to you, wrapping his sweaty but oh so save body around your figure, and placed a prolonged kiss on the exposed skin just by your shoulder. So far for taking it slow… He pressed himself thighter against your back, hiding his face in the crook of your neck and intertwined your hands, slowly rocking you two back en forth. “You look beautiful, my love,” he whispered, so only you could hear it, at least you hoped the camera wouldn��t pick that up. You let out a little giggle, like the inner schoolgirl you were whenever he was around you.

“Kal loves when Y/N does his makeup as well, don’t you boy,” Henry explains with a smile and looks down at the bear by your bare feet. Kal gives a small ruff and sweeps his tail eagerly. “Did you show them what you made,” he asked you with a wide smile, and looked straight in to the camera, “she worked really hard on that design, so I hope you all like it,” he declared proudly.

You ended up doing your makeup routine with your two boys in the background. Henry left for a few minutes to shower in the second bathroom your hotelroom had, and came back clad in a pair of light jogging trousers and a sweater. Even though you were inside, it was still a bit too chilly to walk around in short sleeves, being mid-winter and all. He just sat on the small wooden bench by the door, still in frame for everybody to enjoy and behold. His hair now damp. He was reading in a book and patiently waiting for you to get ready, occasionally looking up and laughing when you would wet your hands or Kal’s special makeup brush in the sink and pretend to do his makeup. The dog would bark excitedly and give you kisses. “Wow Kal, you look so pretty,” Henry told the big floof with the chuckle.

“Okay, this was my -somewhat- everyday makeup routine! Thank you guys for watching this chaotic mess, hope you laughed a bit, bye-bye, 再见!” How do those vlogger end their videos? Smash like and subscribe?

Behind you Henry looked up from the pages of his fantasy book and arched his brow, “Hey! No shout-out for your special guests? See you all next time!”

WOOHOO!! This is my very first fanfic, I really hope you enjoyed it. Liking, reposting and commenting would mean a lot to me! If you do repost this, please do not edit or copy my work. I worked really hard on this.

Much love, Nahmi xxx

Masterlist can be found HERE!

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proserpina-magnus · 3 years ago

Note

i loved your blurb where the marauders comforted the reader about her eating issues. i have struggled with and eating disorder for two years now and i sadly when to the hospital recently. your fic made me feel so much better. I was wondering if you could write another one like that where james is sitting at dinner with the reader and he eats with her. again i love your writing all well <33

Hi!! I'm glad you found comfort in the blurb I wrote! I'm sorry you have struggled with eating issues and I hope in the future you can slowly lead yourself into a healthy life style that makes you feel safe and comfortable! I hope this blurb helps you. If you ever need someone to talk to, my dms are always open!

One where he helps you back into a healthy eating habit [ James Potter ]

Word Count: 1609

[ warning: female reader, eating issues/struggles, petnames such as "baby", background wolfstar + peter, James Potter in-fact strutted, not edited well ]

James had known about your eating issues, so he tried his absolute best to be a good boyfriend and help you in any way he could.

He first started to leave you small candy as gifts, always keeping sweets in his pockets. When you refused most of it, he only frowned but understood.

He kept trying new things, ranging from eating with you alone or taking you on dates that involved food. He even decided to cook your favourite foods for a date idea, he was thrilled when you ate everything and praised him for the meal.

You had been slipping back into your harmful eating habits again, skipping meals and trying your best to only drink water. James caught on pretty quickly, making a note to himself to get you back on a healthy eating track.

You gathered your things up, Care of magical creatures class had just ended. You look at James who is walking over to you in a confident strut, a smile on his face.

"Hi baby, can I walk you to the dining hall?" James asked, his hand resting on the low of your back. You sling your bag over your shoulder, shaking your head.

"Sorry James, I'm going to the library," you tell him, slipping away from his hand but he only moves closer. You both walk out into the hall, getting pushed to the closest wall by all the running students who are trying to get to the dining hall.

"I didn't see you at breakfast," He says, pulling you by the waist to get closer. Your head rests on his shoulder briefly, cuddling into his body.

"Yeah, I ate in my dorm. okay, I'm heading this way," You lied, smiling as you both walked down the crowded corridor.

"I'll see you at dinner?" He asked, a small worried feeling filled his gut. He was determined to help you in any way he could, he cared deeply about this and took it seriously.

"Sure James," you began, leaning up on your toes to kiss his cheek gently, your hand on his forearm for support. "Alright, I'll see you later,"

You part away from him, waving as you twirl to walk faster down the corridor to the library. James has a goofy smile on his face, watching you walk away.

"I better see you at dinner!" James calls out, getting shushes from talking paintings. He makes a shrug to them, giving a glare to tell them to piss off.

"Okay!" You yell back, waving your hand as you walk out of talking distance. James watches you leave for a moment, before heading towards the dining hall.

He catches up with Sirius and Peter, his arms swinging around them as he pulls them towards him.

"Where's [ name ]?" Peter asked, turning his head to see if you're where following them.

"She's going to the library," James answers, ruffling his fingers between Peter's blonde locks, making him giggle.

"She wasn't at breakfast prongs," Sirius tells James, giving him a small look. James shrugs, nodding as they get to the Gryffindor table. They plop down, shoving food onto their plates.

"I know. after I eat I'll pop into the library 'n give her a small snack," James plans, placing one of your favourite sandwiches to the side of his plate to save for you. The boys nod, soon Remus joins them at the table and they start to talk about classes.

James finishes his lunch, putting your sandwiches on a small plate as he bids his friends goodbye. He almost skips to the library, a small smile on his face.

"Hi baby," He whispers, sliding into the chair beside you. You sat in the back of the library, bookshelves hiding you from the rest of the students. You feel James kiss your head, sliding the plate next to your open book.

"James, what are you doing here?" You ask, giving him a confused stare. He smiles, gesturing to the sandwich.

"I'm bringing you lunch," he says, moving his chair to bump with yours.

"I already ate breakfast," you lied, pushing the plate away from your schoolwork. You almost frown at the thought of eating but smiled instead at the small action James took. His small actions always meant the most to you, it made you feel cared for and loved.

"Okay? Now you're going to eat lunch, you need three meals a day to fully function and be healthy," James states, pushing back the plate as he gives you a knowing look.

"I'm not hungry," you protest, going back to writing on your parchment paper. You were just about the dip your quill in ink before your book and parchment got snatched from you.

"Hey! James!" You gasp, trying to grab your work but he only pulls it away from your grasp.

"You can have it back after you eat," James reasons, sliding your work to the other side of the table. You go to stand up, but James only pulls you back down with a gentle hand on your wrist.

"James I don't want to," you whispered to him, you felt his hand slide into yours. He gave it a gentle squeeze, a knowing smile on his lips to give you some comfort.

"I know, but you need this to stay healthy. You deserve to eat okay? You don't have to torture yourself anymore," He assured, his eyes holding a comforting look in them. You sigh from uncertainty, turning your gaze to the plate.

"It's your favourite, you'll enjoy it. You deserve to enjoy this," James whispers into your ear, you turn away from him. You feel slightly embarrassed, so you lean your back against his chest as you pick up the sandwich.

You place it to your lips, taking a small bite. You chew for a slow minute, uncertainty in your veins. But James slides his hands around your waist, his chin resting on your shoulder.

You swallow it, instantly taking another bite. You realize how hungry you had been, so you gladly finish the rest of the sandwich.

"Can I have my work back now?" You asked, James presses his lips into your hair. He grabs your stuff, placing it back in front of you.

"Thank you, I'm glad you're eating, I know it's hard for you but you make me so proud," James praises you, which makes you give him a genuine smile. He takes the plate, pulling away from you as he pushes the chair back into its original place.

"You're not going to stay?" You ask, looking up at him as you dip your quill back into the ink pod, a confused look on your features.

"No, I can't. Sirius wants to... uhm, go fishing," James says, lying through his teeth. It's obvious that wasn't the truth and you roll your eyes at the thought of James doing something stupid, again.

"Alright, I'll see you at dinner?" You asked, James smiles proudly as he leaned down to capture your lips against his.

"Of course, but I really need to go! I'll see you at dinner!" James yells as he walks away towards the doors, his loud voice earns him a shush from the Liberian. He gives a mouthed apology, making you giggle.

—-

You finish your class of the day, hurrying along with the rest of the students as you all rush to the dining hall. You see James chatting loudly with Sirius at the Gryffindor table, but to your surprise, he's soaking wet.

You slid next to him, feeling his cold lips against your cheek. You shiver away from him, letting out a small sound of disapproval.

"You're wet," you claimed, seeing as James takes out his wand and mutters a quick spell to dry himself. His hair was a puffy mess, making everyone stare and gasp at his crazy curls.

"Just for you baby," James winked, which earned a laugh from his friends. You chuckle, pushing food onto your plate. Weirdly, all your favourite foods had been made for dinner.

"Charming," you mumble, taking a sip from your cup. You take a piece of food, the first bite being the hardest. James's hand comes to rest on your knee, giving a small smile.

You swallow the first bite, sighing as you cut another piece. Thankfully, the next few bites had been easier than the first. James kept you laughing the whole dinner, making you completely forget about your food. By the time you knew it, your plate was cleared.

"Have sum' more," James huffs, piling some tasty sweets onto your plate. You give him a look, but he only returns it with a look of his own. The pastries looked absolutely dazzling, they looked too good not to eat.

You take a bite, smiling as your taste buds get filled with a glorious warmth. You have to deny letting out a moan from satisfaction, the pastry tasted amazing.

James smiled at your obvious well liking to the food, he nuzzles into you, happy that you're enjoying your food.

"I'm proud of you," James whispered, kissing your shoulder as he earns a groan from Sirius.

"Why do you never kiss me like that?" Sirius whines, making everyone laugh. James kisses Sirius's shoulder, rolling his eyes.

"Happy?"

"Yes," Sirius chimes, giving a wide smile to everyone. James yelps when he gets kicked in the foot by a jealous Remus.

James pulls his attention back to you, a smile on his face. He's beaming at you, a proud look on his face. He was so incredibly happy you ate, he was proud of you with every fiber of his being.

#sirius black #peter pettigrew #james potter #the marauders #james potter x reader #james potter x you #james potter fluff #james potter blurb #marauder x reader #prongs x reader #moony wormtail padfoot and prongs #marauders era

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forever-rogue · 4 years ago

Text

Baby Steps (A Good Man)

A/N: Hello my sunshines! I’m back with another little installment of the AGM ‘verse with our favorite Javi and Dulzura! I love them so much and I’m glad y’all do too! I hope you guys enjoy! As always, comments and feedback are welcome, and if you’d like to be tagged let me know! Xx

*can be read as a standalone or part of the ‘verse as a whole*

Pairing: Professor! Javi x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 5.8k

Warnings: language, pregnant!reader

A GOOD MAN ‘VERSE MASTERLIST

MASTERLIST

JAVIER MASTERLIST

»»————-　♡　————-««

“Mrs. Peña?” the sound of your name still surprised you, despite the fact that the students had been calling you for several months now. A grin worked its way onto your face as you looked at the young boy who was watching you with wide, eager eyes. Putting your pen down, you motioned for him to continue, “will you come outside and play with us?”

“You want me to hang out with you guys?” you almost laughed at the idea that any kid deemed you worthy of spending time with them, “I thought teachers were lame, Mikey?”

“Some of them, but not all of them! You’re pretty cool,” he smiled and displayed his toothy grin. How were you supposed to say no to him? You nodded and stood up, taking the hand he was holding out to you, “besides we’re playing kickball and we need one more person!!”

“I should have known you were just using me for my exceptional skills,” you pretended to be hurt as he pulled out of the building and into the playground, where the sun was shining brightly.

Normally, you’d have turned him down, opting to get some work done during the lunch period, but decided you might as well indulge him and yourself. You really enjoyed the kids you had this year, and it was a gorgeous early spring day.

»»————-　♡　————-««

Turns out, kickball with a bunch of seven and eight year olds was not as simple as it seemed. They seemed to come up with all sorts of nonsense rules, and on top of it all, they happened to be extremely competitive. And yet...you were thoroughly enjoying yourself - and glad you had opted to wear jeans today instead of a skirt or dress. Javi had been particularly fond of the tight, high-waisted jeans that hugged you in all the right places, getting very handsy before you both had to leave for work. Typical Javier; not that you minded of course.

“Come on, give us a good one, Mrs. P!” Mikey yelled at the top of his small lungs as you proceeded to kick the ball that was rolled at you. You offered up a firm kick, but not one you would have used if you’d been playing with only adults. Taking unfair advantage was something you definitely didn’t want to do.

As soon as your foot made contact with the red rubber ball, you watched it whistle through the air before running to the first base. But...it was over before it started as you ran and then immediately proceeded to trip over your slightly untied shoelaces. You made contact with the hard earth before you knew and rolled your ankle in the process.

You landed with a mixture of an annoyed sigh and a loud oof as you chided yourself. You should have made sure they were properly tied before doing anything. The kids clambered around you, faces anxious as they tried to make sure you were okay. Physically you were sure you’d be just fine, but mentally your pride was wounded. Oh, to make a fool of yourself in front of a bunch of children.

“I’m alright,” you promised as you slowly rose to your feet; an instant tinge of pain shot through your ankle and leg as you almost lost your balance again. Maybe you were hurt… “it’s alright - you guys go back to playing and I’m going to go back to the classroom and sit for a moment. I might have twisted my ankle.”

They nodded, but gave you wary looks as you hobbled back inside the building. You should have remained the umpire and refused to play; you were obviously not coordinated enough for any of this. Slumping back in your chair, you rolled up your pant leg and hissed at the sight of the already swollen ankle. Shit.

“You’d better get that checked out,” Anna, one of the teachers from across the hall looked at you with a pained expression, “looks painful.”

“Nothing some rest and elevation won’t fix,” you insisted as you slumped against the back of the chair, “I’m too old for this! When did I become an adult?"

“Hey, at least they think you’re cool,” she huffed playfully, “they never ask me to play! But seriously, that looks pretty bad. And it happened at work, you know how they get about stuff like that.”

“Fineeee,” you groaned, “I’ll go to the school nurse.”

“I would recommend an actual urgent care or ER visit,” she raised an eyebrow, “besides, you know how Javi gets - he'll flay us all if he thought we weren’t looking out for you.”

“He’s...something else.”

“He’s amazing,” she reminded as you nodded in agreement. For how much of a worrywart he could be, you knew it was all out of love, “now go and get it checked out. I’ll handle getting the sub in and telling everyone. You have enough to worry about. Can you make it okay, or will you need a ride? Should I call Javi?”

“I can drive myself,” you promised, thankful it happened to your left foot and not the right, “I’m not going to bother my darling, overprotective husband just yet. Not until I can confirm that nothing is actually wrong. I don’t want him to stress over nothing, and I’m sure by the time he gets home tonight he’ll just be laughing at me and my clumsiness!”

“Alright,” Anna grabbed your purse and handed it to you, as you managed to slink out of the chair, “go get checked out and feel better. If you need anything at all, just call me.”

“Thanks for all of your help,” you hobbled towards the door, trying to keep as much weight off of your foot as possible, as Anna grimaced at you, “I swear it’s not that bad - worse than it looks.”

“Sure, sure,” she disagreed politely, “now quit stalling and go get help!”

»»————-　♡　————-««

The white walls and bright lights of the exam room were enough to rattle your nerves, even if just ever so lightly. You sat on the examination bed and tried to keep yourself calm as you waited for the nurse to come back and begin examining you. Nothing but the distant sounds of people outside and the tick-tock of the aging clock met your ears. You almost wish you’d called Javier just to have some company. Shit.

“Mrs. Peña?” a kind looking woman, maybe around Javier’s age poked her head in as you nodded, “sorry for the wait, we’re pretty busy right now. You’re here for a rolled ankle?”

“Yeah,” you answered as you relaxed at her comforting presence as she came in and sat on her rolling stool, eyes immediately dropping your swollen and irritated ankle, “I was playing with my kids outside - kickball - and then tripped over my own damn feet and ta da!”

“Were you at home when this happened? Playing with your kids?”

“Oh no, I’m a teacher,” you quickly explained, a warm flush rising up your cheeks at the thought of children, “it was on their lunch break at school. I-I don’t have any children of my own.”

You weren’t sure why you felt the need to offer up a clarifying statement.

“I see,” she made a few notes before turning back to you, “it looks pretty bad, to be quite frank. I’m going to assume it wasn’t a break, a sprain rather, from how you’re managing, but we’ll need to do some x-rays to confirm. We’ll do your blood work as well just to make sure everything is in order. Before we do x-rays or anything - are you pregnant?”

“No,” you admitted, looking at your feet as you tried not to sigh. It had been on your mind recently, and you weren’t sure quite what to make of your own feelings on the matter. While you hadn't been actively trying, you couldn't help but wonder if it would ever happen.

“Any chance you could be?”

“Umm,” you twiddled your thumbs as you shrugged your shoulders, “I-I suppose. I’m not on birth control and my husband and I don’t use protection...we’ve been trying but not trying if that makes sense? But my cycle’s been regular so I highly doubt it.”

“Okay,” the scratching of her pen on paper was almost maddening as she was making notes and you just sat there. You could curse yourself for babbling on to her, but you couldn’t really help it. Besides, it’d be better for them to know all the details if they were going to x-ray and poke and prod you, “very good. Let me just go get everything and we’ll get started and a better look at everything. We’ll have you set and on your way in no time.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

“Here you go,” you scratched Stevie’s ears as you offered him a treat, a scrap of carrot from the vegetables you were chopping up for dinner, “what do you think, buddy? Should we tell him tonight?”

“Should we tell who and what tonight?” Javi’s voice startled you so much that you almost dropped your knife. You hadn’t even heard him come in, ever the sneaky DEA agent as he walked into the kitchen. A smile was on his face as he came over to you and pressed a soft kiss to your lips, “hi baby.”

“J-Javi,” you couldn’t help but melt into his touch, despite his surprise arrival, “you’re home!”

“Oh very observant of you, Dulzura,” he teased as he pulled back and started to undo his tie. It was only then that he noticed you weren’t wearing what you had earlier in the day; you were in one of his sweaters and a pair of joggers and… “what the hell happened to your ankle?!”

There it was - Javier switching into overdrive. You put everything down on the counter and turned to him, putting on your most innocent and sheepish expression. His large, warm hands found your face as he looked you over to make sure you were okay.

“It’s nothing, Javi,” you promised him, “I swear it. It’s just a bad sprain, but I went and had it looked at and they wrapped it and gave me pain killers. It’s umm...a stupid little story actually…”

“What happened?” he bent down and reached out to tentatively and delicately cheek the binding to make sure the nurse had properly tended to your sprain. He made a small sound of disgruntled satisfaction before standing up and waiting for a proper explanation, “why didn’t you call me?”

“I didn’t want to worry you, Javier,” you promised as he crossed his arms over his broad but acquiesced with a nod, “you’re so busy, and honestly, it wasn’t a big deal at all. Besides, Anna was ready to call you immediately, but I told her not to worry. All that happened was that I was outside with the kids and we were playing kickball and I tried over my laces, fell, and twisted my ankle. It hurts, but no fracture or anything.”

Javier’s lips twitched as he tried not to laugh, his shoulders shaking with effort as he just studied you, “are you....are you serious, Dulzura?”

“Don’t laugh at me!” you pouted as he started laughing at your dismal nod when you confirmed that that was what actually happened, “they thought I was cool and how was I supposed to say no to them!? I’m the cool teacher to them!”

“And look what that got you,” he snickered as you sighed heavily, “I’m sorry - I’m sorry. As long as you’re okay, that’s what matters. Whatever you need, just tell me the word and I’ll make sure you have it. I’ll take good care of you, Dulzura.”

“I know you will...you always do,” your heart raced as you tried to decide whether or not to tell him the rest of your revelations. But then he looked at you with those eyes, those soft brown, gentle eyes, and your heart melted. He gently pulled you into his arms as he kissed you again, chasing after your soft, sweet lips with his own, seemingly never able to get enough of you, “Javier, I love you.”

“I love you too,” you felt him smile against your lips, “what’s brought on your sudden declaration of love, mi alma?”

“I...I’m pregnant,” you blurted it out without even really thinking about it. Javier pulled back as a surprised expression crossed his features. He looked at you, seemingly in a state of shock, before opening and closing his mouth a few times, “Javi?”

“You’re pregnant?” he repeated as you nodded. It took about a moment for everything to finally come full circle as he finally realized what you had said. Immediately, an overwhelming wave of emotion came over you as you felt the back of your eyes start to sting with tears. He grabbed your face and slowly crashed his lips back onto yours and kissed deeply and slowly, “holy shit.”

“I know,” you beamed at him, “they asked before they did x-rays and blood work and then well...they discovered I was pregnant. I had no clue and then they told me and yeah - holy shit."

“That’s amazing,” he said softly, “pregnant....”

“I know,” you breathed him in and ran a hand through his dark curls, “I’m not far along, only like six weeks, so it’s still very early, but yes. We’re finally having a baby, Javier!

“I don’t know what I ever did to deserve you,” he whispered as he wrapped his arms around and held you in a tight embrace, “I love you so much.”

“You deserve this - everything. You are such a good man, Javier, and I am so honored to call you my husband, and the father of my child,” he almost melted under your praise as you traced along his features before resting your hand on his cheek, “I love you, Javi. I am so excited for this.”

“Me too,” he agreed, “this is everything - you are everything.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

3 months pregnant

“Dulzura?” Javier yawned as he wiped the sleep from his eyes as he got up and found you in the kitchen, peering into the fridge. You were in the mood for...something. You just weren’t sure what that something was. Everything sounded good but nothing seemed to satiate that craving you had deep within, “what are you doing up?”

“I couldn’t sleep,” you admitted, hoping you hadn’t woken him up by accident, “and I got hungry. I’m sorry if I woke you, my love. Go back to bed, Javier.”

“It’s fine,” he insisted as he shuffled into the kitchen and slowly pried you away from the fridge, “sit down, and let me make you something to eat. What sounds good?”

“Javier,” you did as he asked, padding over to the other side of the counter and taking a seat at the bar. You rested your head on your hands as he stifled a yawn, "honey, go back to bed. You're exhausted and you've got back to back classes tomorrow."

"They start in the late morning," he insisted, with a sleepy nod as you just laughed at him. He was such a stubborn man sometimes it drove you crazy - but you knew it came from a place of love and concern, "don't sleep well without you anyways. 's better when you're there."

"Oh, my sweet husband," he reached into the fridge and pulled out some cheese, butter, and your favorite pickled jalapeños. You watched in curiosity as he went to the bread box and grabbed the fresh loaf of bread you'd purchased earlier at the store, "grilled cheese?"

"Grilled cheese with jalapeños," he corrected, a lazy smile tugged up the corners of his mouth. You made a small sound of musing as you realized it didn't sound too bad at all, "and tomato soup, naturally. How does that sound?"

"Sounds delicious," you grinned eagerly as you leaned in to watch him work. You made a small sound of surprise as your stomach rumbled loudly. Apparently you were hungrier than you had thought, "apparently, my stomach and I agree. I think its your daughter that agrees."

At the mention of your baby, Javier paused and smiled, his eyes flitting to your barely visible bump. Some days he still couldn't believe that you were having a baby. You were his wife. What a wild world it was indeed; years ago he'd never dreamed he would have all of this. The Javier that once existed and refused to believe that there was any light in the world could never have pictured any of this.

But here you were. Continually proving him wrong. And he loved it all.

"Wait - how do you know we're having a girl?" he asked, suddenly wide awake as he raised an eyebrow at you, "I thought we still need to wait another month or so."

"We do," you grinned at him, "but I just know. I'm sure of it!"

"Well, you do have a fifty-fifty chance of being right…"

"I have a hundred percent chance of being right," you insisted as you reached over the counter and grabbed the jar of pickled jalapeños and fished a few out, and popped them into your mouth, "don't argue with your pregnant wife, Javier Peña. You of all people should know not to cross someone so dangerous."

He snorted with laughter, suddenly feeling much more awake as he sliced up cheese and turned on the stove, "and if we end up having a son?"

"Then we keep having more until we have a daughter and I am proven right," you plastered on a sweet smile, knowing it would wind him up. You'd never really discussed how many children you wanted or planned on having. It was just a sort of...whatever happens happens type thing. But, if you were being honest, you'd probably have given Javier as many children as he wanted. Your husband fell silent as he watched you for a moment before taking the jar away from, "nothing to add? Silence isn't like you, my love."

"We can have as many as you'd like," he promised, "you're the one doing all the hard work. If you're done after one, then it's fine for me. You already amaze me every day."

"Don't make me cry, Javier," your whole body soaked in the warmth and love from his simple words, "its getting really easy at this point, and you're taking advantage!"

"Sorry," he shot you a wink before leaning over and pressing a soft kiss to your lips, "back to business."

"Hmm," you mused quietly, "I thought kissing me was business."

"I thought you were hungry?"

"Fine," you playfully huffed as he carried on cooking, "Javi?"

"Dulzura?"

"I love you," you beamed at him, the little smile that worked its way onto his face take your breath away - as it always had.

"I love you."

»»————-　♡　————-««

6 months pregnant

A huff escaped your lips as you tried to reach for the socks and underwear that had fallen out of the laundry basket. It was no easy feat when you couldn’t see your own feet anymore. But you were determined to get everything up and off the floor as you walked back towards your bedroom to put away the clean clothes. And you weren’t about to give up and ask for help - not yet anyway.

Instead, you opted to awkwardly lower yourself to the floor in order to blindly grab for the discarded items. But it was no use...this was almost harder.

“You alright, Dulzura?” Javier came in and found you struggling, cleaning his dirty hands off on a rag. He’d been working outside, getting the garden spruced up as the summer slowly came to an end, “can’t reach?”

“I can,” you stuck your tongue out at him as he huffed with laughter, but motioned for you to go on. Wanting to prove that you were right, and weren’t completely helpless after all. It hadn’t been easy having to give up a lot of the things you used to be able to do with ease as you progressed in your pregnancy. The fact that none of your pants would fit over your belly anymore had been a point of horror for you - it meant you were truly and actually pregnant, you were actually having a baby. You’d always known, but that had been what made it all extremely real. Every day you got closer and closer to your due date, it all became a little more real. Exciting - but terrifying.

Not being able to see your feet had been another blow. You could hardly get proper shoes on anymore, opting for easy slide ons, which were great for the warmth of summer and didn’t matter since you were on summer break along with your kids. It was almost as though Javier could sense your frustration, and he’d often silently help you with getting your shoes on in the morning. He never said a word, knowing he didn’t have to. He always told you he loved you in so many ways, often without saying it.

You tried to again, dangling your hand along on the floor as you tried again. After watching you struggle for a moment, Javier came over and grabbed everything in one foul swoop before taking your hand in his and helping you upright.

“Hey,” you pouted at him as he put the items back into your basket, “I almost had it!”

“I know,” he kissed the tip of your nose, “but I wanted to help. Why can I not help my gorgeous wife?”

“Your very pregnant and easily frustrated wife?” you teased as you started to walk towards the bedroom. He followed after you, swatting at your bum as you squealed in delight, “Javier!”

“Come on, mi alma,” he grinned, “let me help put everything away.”

“If I let you help, you’re just going to take me to bed and then I’ll have to wash the sheets again!”

“I’ve never heard a single complaint from you before,” as you set the basket on the dresser, he came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist before settling a hand on your belly and gently rubbing it a few times. He pressed a few kisses to the side of your neck as you tilted your head to give him easier access, “there we go, Dulzura. Just like you like it.”

“You’re the worst,” you teased as you turned your head to kiss him, “you’re lucky I love you. And I’m seemingly always in the mood right now - they really weren’t kidding about pregnancy making you more horny. Although, I’ve never heard a single complaint from you before.”

“And you never will,” he promised, his low in your ear as you tried not to completely let your mind wander too far away, “do you have any plans for this afternoon, Dulzura?”

“N-no,” you managed to choke out as one of his hands skimmed along the waistband of your leggings. You knew exactly where this was going, and you were loath to stop him, especially as he slowly kept kissing you.

“Good,” he rasped, “because I have plans for you. Been thinking about you all day, especially in these tight leggings. You knew exactly what you were doing, didn’t you honey?”

“Uh huh,” you agreed as his warm hand slipped inside and a shiver ran up your spine, “Javier. Please.”

“Don’t worry, mi alma,” he captured your gasp in a sweet kiss, “I’ll take good care of you.”

The laundry could definitely wait.

»»————-　♡　————-««

9 months pregnant

It was an early, chilling morning as you sipped on some tea as you sat out in the garden. It was probably too cold to be sitting outside, but you were handled up in blankets and didn't care.

Christmas was a few weeks away and you enjoyed peeking into the neighbor's yards to see what they all had going on for decorations.

"Are you sure you don't want to come inside?" Javier poked his head out from the sliding screen door, his brow furrowed in concentration, "its freezing! And I have breakfast!"

"I've got blankets and a baby keeping me warm," you reminded him, pointing at your large belly. You were due in a couple of weeks; how time had flown. He jokingly frowned at you, sticking out his tongue. Playfully rolling your eyes, you clambered to your feet and waddled over to him, "fine, hold on you big baby. This is because I want breakfast."

Javier was on his winter break from teaching and you were on maternity leave now and you definitely didn't mind having him around all the time. If you could have always had it this way, you definitely wouldn't have minded.

"I'm just looking out for you," he insisted with a pout as you pressed a kiss to his lips, "I talked to Papà. He's really excited to come in a few weeks - more like excited to meet his grandbaby."

"I'm not complaining at all," you insisted, knowing there would be many sleepless nights and chaotic days ahead of you, "we'll need all the help we can get. Hell, maybe we can convince Steve and Connie to come and visit too…"

"I'm sure we'll have all the help in the world between our families and friends, Dulzura," he promised as he took your hand and pulled you into the warm kitchen, putting a plate of breakfast for you on the counter, "I'm sure we'll get sick of having so many people around."

"I guess we'll just have to wait and see," you took a bite and smiled as Stevie laid by your feet. The whole house was warm and cozy, perfectly decorated for Christmas, with a huge tree and already lots of presents. Javier had really outdone himself this year, seemingly more in the Christmas spirit than you. Honestly, you were feeling a little bit out of it - being so pregnant would do that to you.

You watched your husband for a few moments, admiring his profile and lazy smile. Gods, you were still so in love with him. He felt you watching him closely, and turned to you, cooking a dark brow, "what's on your mind, mi alma?"

"Nothing much," you shrugged lightly, feeling a flush of warmth was over you at him catching you, "just thinking about how I love you, and how I'm glad you're here with me, that you knocked me up, and yeah. Are you…are you nervous Javi?"

"About the baby?"

"No, about the Astros' odds next season," you snorted as he groaned at your joke, "of course the baby. I'm just...so nervous. Like I feel ready to meet her, but I'm so scared that I'll fuck it up somehow."

"You still think its a girl?"

"Positive," you grinned at him - you'd decided not to find out the sex ahead of time, leaving it a surprise for both of you. You were still convinced it was a girl, Javier was undecided, "we'll find out soon enough!"

"Either way," he brought his plate and sat down next to you, "everything will be alright. You're going to be an amazing mother, Dulzura. You are everything."

"I love you, Javier," you beamed as he gently put a hand on your belly, "I know it'll be alright, but holy shit - I'm so nervous. Its getting so real lately. We're going to be parents."

"Parents," he repeated, "fuck."

"Who would have thought-" you were quickly cut off when you felt the baby flutter round. A small sound of surprise left your lips as you grabbed Javier's hand and placed it on your belly, "she's telling you not to curse."

He was silent for a moment as a smile spread on his features; despite having felt this many times by now, it still continued to surprise him. He couldn't even imagine how it felt for you, "this is...everything."

"I realized I didn't know what to get you for Christmas so I got you a baby instead," you don't know why it came to mind, but as soon as the words left your lips you brought into a fit of laughter - Javier joined in, a brilliant sound that you adored above all.

"Best Christmas present ever," he whispered before leaning in and giving you a gentle kiss - sweet from the syrup and pancakes he had just eaten, "I mean it. I love you both more than you will ever know."

"We love you too," you grinned as he stroked your belly, "I'm glad your class was the only one available and I took it. I'm glad you were a grumpy professor that let me into his office - I was able to work my magic and look where that got us."

He threw his back with laughter, his dark curls shining brilliantly in the light as his eyes crinkled in the corners. You'd never been more glad for subjecting yourself to his class.

"Me too," he whispered as he put a hand on your cheek, "you always were a stubborn thing."

"Some things never change," you stuck your tongue out at him, "I trust your daughter will be the same!"

»»————-　♡　————-««

You were humming to yourself as you shuffled around the kitchen and tried to put together a mid afternoon snack when you felt an odd sensation in your lower belly. It caused you to drop the knife on the counter as you held onto the marble and gritted your teeth. Stevie was at your feet in an instant, looking at you with concern.

"Its okay, buddy," you reassured him as the pain passed. Surely it couldn't have been anything too bad...probably just an end of pregnancy pain. Sighing at your nonsense worry, you reached for the knife again but before you reached it, the pain was back, "never mind, shit shit shit."

Trying to keep yourself calm, you leaned against the counter and tried to even your breathing. Contractions. Of course. You were due in a week and you still hadn't been expecting it.

"Javier?" he was down the hall in the second bedroom that had been converted into the nursery, putting away the final touches of clothing. Before he could respond, you felt an odd sensation followed by liquid running down your legs, "Javier!"

"What's wrong, Dulzura?" he rushed down the hall and back into the kitchen, worry etched onto his features as you stood there in shock and clutched at your belly, "honey-"

"My water broke," you said meekly as you pointed to your wet pants, "and I've had a few contractions - I think the baby's coming."

"Okay," he immediately kicked into gear as he remained cool and calm, despite wanting to panic and worry along with you, "its okay. I'm going to get the hospital bag, we'll get you in the car, Stevie to the neighbor, and then we'll go and have a baby."

"You make it seem so simple," you huffed lightly as you tried to channel his inner calm demeanor, "we'll be okay, right? I-I'm scared…"

"I know, honey," he promised as he kissed the side of your head, "you've done so amazing already, it will all be okay. I'm right here, okay? I'm just going to grab your bag and the dog and we'll go. Ten minutes and we'll be on the way."

"Okay," you agreed as he practically ran down the hall to get your packed bag, "we're going to have a baby, Javi."

"Indeed we are," he agreed with a small smile as he reached for his wallet and keys and stuff for the neighbor to watch Stevie for a few days, "we're having our baby."

Holy shit.

»»————-　♡　————-««

“You’re doing amazing, sweetheart,” Javier praised you as you squeezed his hand after another push. You groaned and gritted your teeth as you glared at him; this was absolute hell, “the baby’s almost there.”

“Shut up, Javier,” you hissed as you got ready for another push, “I am never letting you touch me again! You did this to me.”

“Hey - it was a team effort,” he reminded you in a vain attempt at a joke. Your death glare and the squeezing of his hand said it all, “sorry, Dulzura. I love you.”

“I love you too,” you said as you took a deep breath, “but right now, I’m blaming this on you.”

“Fair enough,” he said as you pushed again. He was sure his hand was going to break.

»»————-　♡　————-««

It wasn’t much longer before you were laying back and holding the smallest bundle you could ever imagine in your arms. You were somewhere between crying tears of joy and exhaustion, as you stared at your newborn daughter in awe. Javier was sitting next to you, looking down at her, his own eyes glossy as he gently touched her cheek. She had the darkest eyes and a shock of dark hair, already taking after her father. She had come into the world squealing and crying but had fallen asleep almost as soon as Javier held her.

“I told you we were having a girl,” you teased him softly, “I was right. Look at her, Javier. That’s our daughter. We made her.”

“You did all the hard work, mi alma,” he whispered as he pressed a kiss to the side of your head, “she’s beautiful.”

“Lucia Luna Peña,” you grinned at your husband, “it’s perfect. I love you both more than you could ever know. Javier...you really are everything to me - the best friend, best husband, and now the best father. She’s going to love the hell out of you, just like I do.”

He remained silent for a moment as he looked at the sleeping baby before looking back at you. His whole world was in his arms, and the thought of that alone was enough to overwhelm him with emotion. He’d never thought he wanted this - a “boring” job, a home, a wife, and a baby.

But here he was. And he had never felt happier, never felt more full of love and life. This was everything.

“I love you so much, Dulzura - you and Lucia,” he promised as he rested his head on top of yours, “you have given me everything, more than you know. Te quiero con todo.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

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#javier peña #javier peña x reader #javier pena x fem!reader #javier pena x you #a good man #agm universe #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader

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afriendlyblackhottie · 4 years ago

Text

Kin

Summary: Bucky’s been acting weird and you can’t help it when you expect the worst.

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Black!Reader

Warnings: 18+, smut, swearing, breeding kink, daddy kink, dirty talk, degradation, GGFIL (you’ll see), arguing, cheating accusations

(A/N: this is different but I had fun writing it. And isn’t that what matters. Reblog follow like 💜✌🏾)

Tagging: @titty-teetee @zaddychris @queenoftheworldisdead @olyvoyl @liquorlaughslove @mariahthelioness29 @donutloverxo @little-baby-vixen @mochamaniacbabe @brattycherubwrites @iam-laiya @whiskey-cokenfanfic @doloreshazes

——————————————————————————-

Bucky had never given you a reason to not trust him. He’d been nothing, but the perfect boyfriend now fiancé for the two years you’d been together. Sure it was a little difficult dating an Avenger mostly because you worried about him coming back to you, but still being with him was kind of perfect.

The first time you started to sort of question things was when a phone number fell out of his pocket while you were doing laundry. Some girls name written on a napkin. You didn’t want to jump to any conclusions especially since it’s not like he wasn’t meeting new people everyday because of work. Who knows it was probably nothing.

Then he came home all late that day smelling like vanilla. You know it was bad, but you tried to check his phone while he was sleeping. Not that it worked because your super assassin fiancé was a very light sleeper and woke up before you could even try.

“Hey, what’s up?” He asked, in that sleepy voice.

“Oh it’s nothing,” you said, playing it off by stroking his hair. You know you should have said something, but you couldn’t bring yourself to do it.

All he did was smile and kiss you before pulling you close. Like everything was fine. You know you should have asked him right then. The words had been on the tip of your tongue.

But you didn’t ask. Instead you let him roll on top of you before he started making out with you. Would a man that’s cheating be fucking your mouth with his tongue like that. Probably.

“Alright, what’s wrong?” Bucky asked with a sigh, putting his forehead to yours.

You shrugged, looking down at his mouth so you didn’t have to look him in the eye. “It’s nothing.” Then you out a fake smile on to really sell it.

“Come on,” he whispered. “You know I know you better than that. If somethings wrong you can tell me. Daddy’ll take care of you, Doll.”

You made the mistake of looking into his blue eye that seemed to be seeing into your soul. There was always this gentleness towards you. That he seemed to save for you especially.

“I’m fine,” you replied before rolling over on your side away from him. Bucky sighed again before wrapping his arms around you from behind.

“Hey, so I’m busy tomorrow, but when I get home why don’t we do something?” He asked into your shoulder before pressing a kiss to it. “Just the two of us?”

You nodded, but didn’t reply out loud because if you did he’d hear that you were crying. You’d rather not deal with it.

So the next day you went to get some stuff done. Grocery shopping and shit. On the way home you passed by this coffee shop, recognizing his car as some girl got into the passanger seat.

Your stomach felt like it was doing fucking somersaults on the way home. You tried to keep yourself busy. Not wanting to think about Bucky or his lying cheating face.

When the door opened, you could hear him set his keys down on the table beside the door. You were making dinner because you were hungry. He could worry about himself.

“Fuck it smells good in here, Baby,” he said, coming to hug you from behind before kissing your cheek.

You didn’t say anything at first. Instead you continued to cook and even though he noticed how quiet you were, he didn’t let go of you.

“What? No hello?” He asked, kissing your neck.

You tried to shrug him off, but no you just had to be engaged to a super assassin who was strong as fuck.

“What’s wrong?” He asked.

You shook your head because you were pretty sure if you’d say anything you’d explode. Not that he wouldn’t deserve it. You were trying to keep an ounce of dignity instead of blowing up like your brain was telling you too. “Nothing.”

Bucky leaned up against the counter beside you, bringing your face up so he could look at you. “Baby, I know you better than that.” He tried to smile to get you to open up then it faltered when he saw that you were clearly not in the mood. “C’mon. Just tell me what’s up.”

“Nothing, James.” You turned off the stove because now you’d lost your appetite. As you tried to walk away he grabbed your hand.

At hearing his first name, he crinkled his nose. “Baby,” he whined all pouty, “please. I let it go last night, but you’ve never not talked to me. What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong is that we’re supposed to be getting married in two months and you’re cheating on me.”

Bucky looked so taken aback. His face getting all scrunched up. “What?”

“Oh so now you don’t know what I’m talking about?” You scoffed. “I saw you.”

“Saw me doing what?” He scoffed out a laugh. “I haven’t done anything.”

“Bullshit!” You yelled. “You’re lying to me!”

His jaw clenched as you raised your voice. “Watch your tone,” he commanded. “I didn’t cheat on you. I have no idea what you’re even talking about.”

“Really? Well then who the fuck is Becca?” You finally asked.

Bucky pulled away and you finally turned to face him. “How did you...” he trailed off.

“So, it’s true. You��re cheating on me?” You asked with a sniffle.

He shook his head. “No! Of course not, Baby,” he said.

“You’re lying! I saw you, James. I fucking saw you with her!”

“Hey, hey, hey,” he said, putting his hands on your shoulders. “Let’s just calm down so we can talk.”

“I don’t want to talk. I want you out.”

He shook his head. “No, Baby,” he said. “I know how this looks, but I promise it’s not like that. I’m not... I’m not cheating on you. I’d never.”

“Fine then explain.”

Bucky hesitated. Closing his eyes like he was trying to find the right words.

“If you don’t tell me then I want you out.”

It wasn’t like this was the first time you and Bucky had ever fought. This was just the first time you’d ever done this. Usually when he messed up, he’d buy you flowers or kiss you until you forgave him. This time you needed to let him know that none of that would work.

He scrunched up his face before finally looking at you. “Okay. Becca is...” he took a deep breath. “Becca’s my great granddaughter.”

You also finally understood what it meant for it to be so quiet you could hear a pin drop. Bucky’s eyes bore into yours as he gave his answer.

“Can we just sit and talk?” He asked.

You nodded and he turned off the stove so he could grab your hand to lead you over to the couch. He sat you down in his lap and you couldn’t help it as you started crying into his chest because you felt like the worlds biggest asshole.

“Hey, Baby, don’t cry,” he said. “Not like you could have known. Hell not like I knew until recently.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” You asked him with tears in your eyes. “We usually tell each other everything.”

“Because... I dunno I was waiting for the right time. It’s kind of hard to go to your fiancé and ‘go hey meet my great granddaughter, Baby.’” He chuckled before wiping your tears. “Or that I have a son and he’s seventy-six.”

You raised your eyebrows. “Seriously?”

Bucky nodded and laughed. “I know right. It’s...” he sighed, “it’s so weird, but I’ve been hanging out with them and its been kind of great actually. Having a family. Hate that I didn’t get to see him grow up.”

“God I’m... such a bitch.”

He chuckled, shaking his head. “You would have never guessed,” he replied, placing a kiss to the side of your head. “So, yeah. Becca is my great granddaughter. I was picking her up from work. She’s seventeen.” He looked down then at you again. “I just... I wanna be in their lives. Make up for lost time.”

You nodded. “I get that.”

“I should have told you. I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t want you to get freaked out.”

“Bucky, I’d never get freaked out over something like that,” you said. “Things are different for you and I wanna be as understanding as possible.”

He smiled. “I know, but doesn’t make it any easier.”

“I know.” You put your head into his neck. “God I’m such an asshole.”

“No you’re not. Any woman would have assumed the worst like you did. I didn’t give you any reason not to.”

Your lip trembled as tears fell from your eyes again. “I’m sorry, Bucky.”

“I know, Baby,” he whispered.

“So, how did you find out?” You asked.

“Becca came looking for me. Saw stuff about the Avengers and saw me. My son James, his mom told him all about me so...”

You smiled, but you were still all teary eyed from the way you’d talked to him just now. “I’m so happy for you, Baby.”

“Yeah, well, they’re your family now too. If you still wanna get married.”

“Of course I do! I was just... I was scared to lose you so I freaked out.”

Bucky kissed your cheek. “You’re never gonna lose me, Doll. Besides, if anything this all just made me wanna be with you more. All I can think about is making babies with you.”

You laughed. “You would.”

“It’s true. All this just made me realize how bad I wanna have a family with you. I just... I mean our wedding is two months away, would it be so bad if we started trying now?”

You shrugged and he smiled before leaning into kiss you.

“Tell me you don’t want me to put a baby in this pussy and I’ll back off until the wedding,” he whispered into your ear.

“Daddy, I...”

You could feel him growing harder against your ass as he started grinding you into him. Fuck he knew how to get you to that point. You hated how it took pretty much nothing for you to want him to fuck the shit out of you.

“Tell me you want it,” he whispered in your ear. “Tell me you wanna have my baby.”

You sighed so deeply because his breath against your year was making you feel fucking feral. “I want it.” It was like you couldn’t even stop yourself from saying it.

“What do you want. Tell Daddy what you want.”

You looked up at him with those big eyes. “I want you to put a baby in me.”

“Yeah? I wanna make you a mommy, Doll,” he said, before putting his metal hand around your neck as he leaned you into him. He helped you pull your legging down until you could kick them off. Then kissed your shoulder as he spread your legs. “You want Daddy to put a baby in this little pussy, Baby?” He asked now that he’d pushed your panties to the side so he could play with your clit.

“Daddy,” you whimpered, leaning back so you could connect your lips to his. He started doing that thing again where his tongue fucked your mouth.

All that plus with the way he was touching you was making you forget all about how embarrassed you felt for accusing him of such a terrible thing. You should know that your daddy would never hurt you like that.

“Gotta teach you a lesson now,” he said. “Don’t you ever accuse me of something like that again. I should fucking spank you.”

“I’m sorry,” you said, your pussy feeling all tingly from the way his fingers were rubbing you making you let out a moan. “Daddy!”

“That’s it, Slut. Don’t you ever threaten to take this pussy from me again. It’s mine.” He growled into your ear and it made your stomach tighten especially when he started nibbling on it.

You nodded. “I’m sorry.”

“Good little slut,” he said. “You know better. This is mine.” Bucky’s fingers now dipped into your pussy making you let out a whine.

“Yes, Daddy!” You mewled as he stuffed your pussy with his thick fingers. Metal hand going from your neck to your tits.

“You’re lucky I can’t wait to fuck you or else I’d be punishing you, Doll,” he said as he groped you.

You leaned back so you could kiss him again. Reached between the two of you so you could take hold of his dick through his pants. Enjoying how hard he felt through the denim. “I know, Daddy.”

“You’re so lucky I wanna cum in this pussy instead.” Thats when he tore his hands out of you before forcing you to stand up. Bucky undid his pants, pushing them and his boxers off before pulling you back down.

He didn’t waste any time in sinking you down on his dick. Hands on your ass as he helped you move up and down. “Who’s pussy is this?”

“Yours,” you whimpered. “All yours.”

Bucky grabbed the hem of your top so he could pull it over your head, watching as your tits bounced. “That’s right, Doll. Not gonna pull that shit again.”

You shook your head and then threw it back as you moaned. Bucky pushed you to the side against the couch before getting up so he could climb on top of you.

“Fucking love this juicy pussy,” he said. His metal arm coming to grab at your thigh as he bent your leg over his shoulder.

He thrusted in and out of you, shoving himself inside of you as his dick stretched you out. You tugged at his t-shirt that he hadn’t taken off. “Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!” Your head was bent back against the couch as you let out this low moan. “Fuck, Bucky!” Your eyes were watering as you started to feel your orgasm coming to you.

“That’s it, Baby, I know you want it. Want Daddy to cum in your pussy?”

You nodded as he got up so he could hold your throat again because he knew how much you loved it. “God, yes. I’m gonna cum.”

“Yeah?” He groaned. “Gonna cum on Daddy’s dick?” He was all in your face.

You reached up so you could tug on his hair. “Yes! Fuck, please.”

“Good because I’m gonna cum in you. Daddy’s gonna gonna fill you up, Y/N.”

You cried out wrapping your legs around him as you came so hard. Maybe it was from all that bullshit and you almost ruining everything because fuck it felt so damn good. Especially with the way he was fucking you through it.

That was when he got closer to you. His balls slapping against your ass as he started getting really deep into you. “Fuck,” he hissed. “Daddy’s gonna cum in this pussy, Baby. I know that’s what you need, Baby. Need Daddy to keep you pregnant.”

“Uh huh,” you moaned.

“I’m gonna keep getting you pregnant for as long as you can. Make you have so many babies.”

You couldn’t help it as the noises you were making started getting louder. “Yes. Please.”

That’s when his hips stilled as he started to fill you. His seed flooding into your womb for the first time. He put his head into your neck once he started moving them again, trying to make sure he could give you ever last drop.

He laid there on top of you. Breathing all heavy before pressing kisses into your neck again. “Was that our first time without a condom?” He asked.

“Uh huh,” was all you could say. It was like you couldn’t move.

Bucky chuckled seeing you all frozen before yawning and getting off of you. He grabbed you so he could carry you to your room, cradling you in his arms. When he finally laid you down he pulled the comforter over your body, pretty much tucking you in.

He took his shirt off before getting in beside you, “Comfortable?”

“Mhm,” you replied your brain feeling like it couldn’t think.

“You okay?” He asked.

“Yeah. You just made my mind into goo,” you grumbled.

Bucky smiled before kissing your nose. “Good.” He held you around your waist. “So,” he breathed, “what do you think about meeting everyone.”

“How much is everyone?” You asked with a smile, turning to him.

“There’s James. And, he had a son also named James and then he had a son named Kyle. He’s twenty-two.” Bucky laughed.

Your jaw dropped. “Jesus.”

He was still laughing. “I know, right. And he looks just like me. It’s kinda scary.” But, there was this softness in his face. It was different than the one he gave you, but there was almost this pride you’d never seen him have before. “Then there’s Becca. She’s so much like me it’s terrifying. She even has a friend like Steve. It’s awful.”

This time you laughed with him. “Would it be bad if I met them?” You asked.

He shook his head. “No. I’ve been wanting you to, they’ve even been asking, but I just... I didn’t wanna freak you out about being a great grandma.”

You pouted, creasing your brow. “Baby, I know how strange your life is to say the least. I’ve kinda made peace with the idea that there’s going to be random shit popping up. Kinda what I signed up for when I agreed to marry an old man.”

Bucky’s jaw dropped, before he patted your butt. “You’re such a brat,” he said before kissing you. Then he pulled you away. “Wait I didn’t tell you about Noel and Kimmy.”

You laughed and then wrapped your arms around him as he told you about the two youngest kids. God you felt like such an asshole now. Maybe a blowjob later would make it up to him.

#bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes x black!reader #Bucky Barnes x reader #bucky barnes x female reader #sebastian stan smut #sebastian stan x reader #Sebastian Stan x black!reader

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foryoumyheroes · 4 years ago

Text

Otaku

[Bakugou + Todoroki] are in love with the anime character [Name].

A/N: Gender-neutral reader Crackish??

Bakugou Katsuki:

He’s sort of picky with the genre, be it fantasy, horror, shonen, but his favorite character has to be a super cool, super powerful one. No excuses.

You know, the type of anime character that’s probably introduced through a silhouette of them posing dramatically with their notorious group whose image is teased throughout the first few episodes/seasons.

He goes pretty hard for All Might, and he’s definitely the same for your character.

Reads the manga (but he buys it super secretly, like in a hoodie at night and the cashier probably thinks that they’re being robbed until he brings the entire [Series] collection to the register). Watches the anime the moment it’s broadcasted, reads metas and watches youtube videos that talk about conspiracies/analyses of your character.

NO ONE CAN KNOW THOUGH.

He’s taking his anime phase to the grave.

For some reason gets super aggressive when you’re being flirty or being shipped with another character?? He hates all the scenes that tease any potential romance between you and other characters. asdfgj He’s like, “No one is good enough for [Name]!!! Except for me.”

He even tries to think up ways he can legitimately square up with them LMAO. Like he wonders how he could defeat your potential S/Os in a fight but y’all are like ,,, anime characters SO WHY DOES IT EVEN MATTER LOL

“Three-sword style?? Tch, I’d fucking blow that bastard to bits.”

“Who’s this Gaara of the Sand looking ass and why is the author getting so bold.”

He even tries to think of how well your abilities match up with his own Quirk, this dork.

THE LENGTHS HE WOULD GO FOR YOU.

If you were a real life person and your dislikes are lets say spicy food or loud, overbearing people, Bakugou would be like, “Tch I’m right, they’re wrong. Shut the fuck up!!!” But if his ultimate wifu/husbando has those dislikes he would be like, “Omg...😳😳 opposites attract...👉👈”

He honestly tries to be a low-key fan (as in, not be a fan at all to outsiders), but if one day during class Kaminari ends up saying that in [Series], you’re the weakest character in your group/squad, Bakugou would get super angry.

“Hey, Dunceface!! It’s so fucking obvious that you’re an anime-only fake fan, so don’t talk as if you know shit!”

Bakugou is those “um actually” ;; fans

Bakugou is a manga reader, so by the time your introduction scene or Ultimate Attack scene is being aired he becomes super OOC. He’s hyped for it for days, incredibly nervous at how the animators handle the scene.

By the time he watches it??

THE ANIMATION!! THE VOICE ACTING!! YOUR COOLNESS!!! PLS ORA ORA HIM IN THE CHEST!! HE’S BEGGING YOU! IF YOU’RE GOING TO UNISON RAID WITH ANYONE PLS LET IT BE HIM!!

He’s legitimately sweating buckets by the time the episode is over. A whole-ass fire hazard.

Probably knows how to play your character theme on the drums.

Omg but if your character dies/is hinted toward dying/or the most recent chapters ends with a cliffhanger where you’re fatally injured he will become legitimately depressed.

Like holes himself in his dorm room for a whole day without contacting anyone and with the blinds drawn type of depressed.

When he comes to class the next day with eye-bags and is slouching and his classmates think that something horrible has happened, it’s probably only Izuku who knows what’s going on.

He’ll say, “You’re upset about the most recent chapter of [Series], right? I know it must be hard for you right now.” He’ll give Bakugou an officially licensed rubber strap of your character and Bakugou will just ;; cradle it in his hands softly.

In complete seriousness, your character is probably someone who is strong physically, but publicly rallies for things like, “Failure is fine.” Your character arc would probably explore what it’s like being not good enough or feeling constantly disappointed, so he feels comfort in your character.

Todoroki Shoto:

In comparison to Bakugou, he’s probably a more low-key fan unintentionally, but goes just as hard.

Buys all of the merch, limited-edition or not, has your picture set as his phone lockscreen and homescreen, has a little acrylic charm of you on his phone, follows several fanartists that draw your character on social media. He buys enough merch that his room looks like a glorified shrine.

It’s canon that he reads manga, but I headcanon that he’s even less picky with his genres and willingly reads things like slice-of-life or shojo all the way to shonen or adult fantasy, so your anime could come from any possible story.

Your character is probably someone who is sweet and kind but has a traumatic character backstory.

He probably ends up thinking stuff like, “If [Name] was with me, I would never let them get treated like that.” asdhj he’s a dork too.

Unironically dramatically quotes you during battle and thinks that it’s still badass because he’s a teenage boy in his anime phase.

Doesn’t get into debates with people who don’t like your character. He’s like, “Everyone is entitled to their own opinion :)) even though they’re wrong. >:(.”

If you’re from a sports/competition anime he’ll try to learn all of the rules, and even try it out for himself (if it’s not fighting) but he finds out that he’s... not very good at it. That doesn’t make him any less amazed though!

If your character is from a different culture with different customs and traditions, he’ll even learn more about them outside of your anime!

Forces his siblings to watch the anime with him. They don’t necessarily have to, but the Todoroki household has one big TV and he hogs it all the time watching your anime over and over.

Natsuo is begging him to watch something else and Shoto will just pout angrily from the other side of the couch.( ￣＾￣)

It’s so jarring because he doesn't look or appear like a hardcore anime fan, but sometimes he’ll just butt into conversations randomly and talk about you.

Like you know those tumblr Naruto posts that talk about it as if it’s some sort of Renaissance literature. That’s Todoroki.

[”Man, they’re so hot--!”

“You want to see someone hot?” Todoroki asks with a perfectly straight face, and he’ll just... turn his phone around and show them a picture of an anime character.]

When his dad tries to set him up with someone else: “You think they’re my type? Do they watch [Series]? Do they know what true friendship is?? Do they understand pining and love the way [Name] does?”

Endeavor: who the FUCK is [Name].

Gets into fanfiction because of your character and series. He’ll just be reading on his phone during break times at school and everyone thinks that he’s being so well-read but he’s just reading pure smut with a straight face.

Doesn’t mind when you’re shipped with other characters necessarily but he is super picky. If your character is hinted toward a potential romance with another character that’s pretty crass and doesn’t necessarily treat you well but you’re sticking together through the power of friendship, he won’t ship it.

He’s just like “[Name] would be so much happier with someone else like me.” :////

And if your character goes through something traumatic or terrible during the series he’ll be so sad, like soooo sad. :((( Deku would probably be comforting him on the couch in the common room and everyone is concerned because he looks like he’s mourning a lost pet, but it turns out to be over some anime character pshhhsdfh.

Deku would just be patting his shoulder trying to console him and Todoroki’s just sitting there with a big frown on his face going, [“But they’ve been through so much throughout the anime already...”

“I know, Todoroki-kun, I know...”

“The author can’t do that to them... It’s just not fair.”

“I get it,” Midoriya says mournfully.]

Plot twist: They like the same anime character

They’ll probably find out when they have to retake the license exam together.

Todoroki will just take his phone out during off times and Bakugou’s eyes looks over because it’s drawn by the noise but then his head just snaps to the side when he realizes its a little charm of you, like, he’s going to get whiplash from that.

“What the -- is that [Surname] [Name]?!”

Like they have never really hung out together before this, so when they both first realize that their favorite character of all time is [Name] they’re left ,, just standing there ,,, pointing at each other like the spiderman meme.

At first they’re both inwardly excited because FINALLY someone cultured and with taste. They spend the entire time talking about your stats, your attacks, your post-timeskip character design, and your personality, and then they delve a little bit deeper and then they realize ,,, oh.

Bakugou says that you don’t belong with the dumb protagonist, you should be shipped with someone strong, confident and loud, but Todoroki is like noooooo they deserve to be with someone that treats them gently.

They connect the dots.

[“Bakugou, you aren’t compatible with [Name]. It says so in their trivia page.”

“Says you! They won’t want some bland-ass pretty boy! They would want a real man!”]

They’re such fanboys ;;; they do realize that you aren’t real, right asdfghj?

One day Kaminari and Sero separately invite them to an anime convention, but they both say no and that they have plans or “something better to do” that day.

Then Bakugou and Todoroki both turn up to the convention at the same place because they both reach for the last limited edition [Name] figure and they just stare at each other wide-eyed (ʘoʘ╬) like that.

They start verbally fighting each other over the last figure and then physically fighting each other andddd then they get kicked out of the convention.

Izuku ends up swooping in and getting the last box.

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